El Roi... The God Who Sees Me

by Lisa Hathaway

Let God Move

On a Monday night in May, after the release of a book I had trusted the Lord with co-authoring, I received a phone call. It was my dad. I had not anticipated this because my dad usually does not purchase books or have time to read. My stomach dropped to the floor when he asked why I shared about feeling alone and unseen in my childhood. What he didn’t understand was that the book was not about me. Unseen: You Are Not Alone is about how God sees us when we feel alone and even like our world is ending. This book was a labor of love. I knew this collection of stories written by college girls who came to trust God completely would touch so many because the subject is so prevalent in today’s society.

As I talked to my dad and shared my heart with him, tears streamed down my face. Prior to my writing, my dad’s and my relationship had been restored and redeemed as only God could have orchestrated. But on the phone at that moment, I thought, “I have ruined this relationship with my dad by writing my chapter.”

No matter how old you are or what has occurred, a daughter’s heart longs for love from her father. I love my dad so much and want to continue growing in the depth of our relationship. As I settled down, I knew I had been obedient to the Lord in writing what I did. It was not easy. It did not make others happy. But I had to trust that God was moving in the hurt. I had to stand by the truth God had placed in my heart. John 13:7 is one of my favorite verses. It says, Jesus answered…“What I am doing you not understand now, but afterward you will understand” (ESV).

After the phone call, the week continued, and I went on vacation with my immediate family; before that, my dad and step-mom confirmed they would come for a few days. However, two days before we left, they said they decided not to go because they wanted my family to enjoy the time without tension. I was heartbroken, but I had to keep trusting that God was working and would mend hearts. I had to release the fact that my dad was hurting, and I couldn’t fix it. I wanted them with us at the beach, but God knew what my soul needed. The beach trip with my husband and my three teenage children was the best vacation we have ever had. It was the sweetest time of refreshing and connecting with my kids. God knew. God saw me and what I needed.

God was working behind the scenes, giving me time and space.

God doesn’t leave us. When we are in pain, we can trust that, in His perfect timing, He will step in to make the way so much better. He will never leave you empty. He is a God who will fill you with all of His blessings—it just might look a little different than you thought or imagined. You see, in the hurt I was experiencing, God was working behind the scenes, giving me time and space as He brought healing. My dad has seen my heart transformed by God’s gentle touch.

I continually stand amazed at how God moves. If your faith is ever running low and you feel like He is not present, look back at what He has already done in your life and remember that if He did it back then, He will do it again over and over. Rehearse what you know of God and how He has shown up and seen the depths of your soul.

Our God sees you!

O BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS! DO NOT BE AFRAID AND DO NOT PANIC... FOR THE LORD YOUR GOD WILL PERSONALLY GO AHEAD OF YOU. HE WILL NEITHER FAIL YOU NOR ABANDON YOU. DEUTERONOMY 31:6 NLT