Nostalgia

By Alexis Abide

Nostalgia /nɒˈstældʒə/ Noun

1. Acute longing for familiar surroundings, esp. regarded as a medical condition; homesickness.

2. Becoming homecoming royalty with a crown of memories and a bouquet of longing to return to what once was.

3. The feeling you get when you eat too many Lucky Charms on Saturday morning, and you don’t feel so lucky anymore when all that processed sugar coats your stomach into a bellyache. And all the technicolor Saturday morning cartoons are all the shows and episodes you’ve seen before.

4. When your serotonin can’t decide whether to be balanced or not.

5. When your hippocampus lights up like a Christmas tree in ‘06. Christmas trees seemed to be so much brighter then. Christmas felt like Christmas then.

6. When the reruns of an episode you remember from a season of your life need a stronger television antenna to get the fuller, clearer picture.

7. The retrospective questions. The I should haves the I wish Is. The hindsight you wish you could give your past self wrapped in an oversized ribbon and character-encrusted wrapping paper.

8. Seeing the small town you grew up in grow up itself. Looking at old stores and places you used to roam stapled with “CLOSING SALE” and “EVERYTHING MUST GO” signs.

9. The constant worry of seeing an old flame out and about. Thinking of dozens of ways to escape the situation before it happens.

10. Hearing an old song you loved back then and your soul leaving your body for a moment. But only for a moment.

11. Going to a high school football game when you are in college. Watching an extracurricular you enjoyed as a high schooler be enjoyed by another generation. Seeing the harvest of what you planted years ago.

12. Stepping into your childhood room and just sitting in the middle of it all. Around your old knickknacks and toys and books you once held.

13. Tears forming in your eyes while the corners of your mouth stick upwards.