THINGS TO DISCUSS

If you haven’t already had these conversations, now might be the time to talk about several things important to compatibility in a union or marriage.

Do you both agree on having children, for example, and will both of you continue to work if you do? Are your religious views similar and, if not, does it matter? Do you agree on where you’ll live together and if you’re saving for a mortgage? What about the in-laws: how often do you each want to see them, are they required to call before dropping by, and are there things you agree are off bounds? Do you need to talk to each other about your levels of debt? What are your thoughts about pre-nuptial agreements?

And then there’s the budget for the wedding or civil union: how much are you both comfortable paying and will you take out finance to pay for the day?

When thinking about the budget, you might want to list all the items you could potentially spend money on and then whittle them down to your preferences and amounts you agree you can afford. Here’s some key items you might want to think about:

 Rings: For one, or both, of the bride and groom.

 Pre -wedding parties: Such as hen’s dos and stag nights.

 Ceremonial fees: Marriage licence, celebrant.

 Venue for the ceremony and for the reception: Venue hire, the hire of furniture, equipment and marquees, decorations, and music/entertainment.

 Catering: Food and drink at the reception, cake.

 Outfits: For the bride: wedding dress, veil and hair accessories, shoes, accessories, lingerie. For the groom: suit, shirt, shoes, and accessories. For bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girls and pageboys: dresses or suits, shoes, accessories.

 Hair and beauty treatments: For the bride, groom and bridesmaids including haircuts and dos, spas, beard trims or shaves, nails, spray tans, and makeup.

 Flowers: At the ceremony and the reception, (if different venues), as well as bouquets and buttonholes.

 Photography: Photographer, photo booth, videographer, streaming, prints and frames, albums, and USB sticks.

 Accommodation: For yourselves and/or guests.

 Honeymoon.

 Other: Gifts and favours.

 Insurance: In case there’s a flood, an earthquake, an accident or, for some other reason, the show cannot go on.