VOICES
Blood Doesn’t Make You Family A good reminder for toxic family members and going home for the holidays BY KATHRYN RICHNER While branded as the most wonderful time of the year, for some, the holidays are seen as stress and anxiety disguised in ribbons and bows. For those who thrive off of Netflix Christmas movies, Michael Bublé, and the now worn out idea of an ugly Christmas sweater, it seems appropriate to label those who don’t as a Scrooge who is unwilling to embrace the joy of the holidays. But not only can there be stress around holiday shopping, party planning, and travel—for some, the holidays can also signify the dread of spending time with toxic family members. Consider this situation which I observed through someone I know: they recently found out through researching their ancestry that the man that they knew to be father for their entire life was not their biological father. Their biological mother had an affair with their biological father and kept it a secret from them as well as her husband. After discovering this information, does this person now have an obligation to the stranger they are suddenly blood related to? Should they reject the person who raised them and instead give the “father” label to whom their DNA came from? The answer is no, and this individual didn’t allow this new knowledge to change their relationship with their non-biological father. Family is ultimately earned and shouldn’t be forced upon us. Just like in any other healthy relationship, if a family member is toxic or abusive, there is no obligation to maintain that relationship simply due to your genetic makeup. What defines true family is those who give you joy and with whom you genuinely enjoy being around. How would holiday stress change if instead of spending it with toxic family members out of some distorted obligation to DNA, we instead chose to spend it with the individuals who love us back?
THE WAKE
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Oh, the Classes You’ll Take
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Make time in your schedule for something a little different this semester BY MARLEY RICHMOND It’s finally that wonderful time of year again… time to delve into Schedule Builder and register for spring semester classes! Whether you’re juggling 25 courses you want to take, or calmly referring to your perfect 4-year plan, registration is full of important choices. Despite degree requirements, making time in your schedule for something new, wacky, or just plain-old-fun will make your upcoming semester so much more enjoyable. You can truly find a class for anything: a dream you had as a child that you secretly still hold onto, or a niche interest you need an excuse to spend time on. Want to figure out why you can’t get your crush off your mind? The Biology of Sex will get you a little bit closer. Need more time for self care? Classes through the Center for Spirituality and Healing are there to help. Always dreamed of playing piano? Or the organ? The music department has you covered! Check out the physical education department for tons of one credit classes—from scuba diving to marathon running—that are sure to fit into even the most rigorous schedules. You can also find a less-intense elective in your actual major to spruce up your semester. After being inundated with intense lectures, labs, or discussions on dense topics, having a bit of breathing room in your schedule—focusing on something physical, fun, or different, not just studying—can allow your brain a break, making your “real” homework feel more manageable. After all, there’s only so much time you can spend on organic chemistry before your brain shuts off. Taking such a class pass/fail ensures that it won’t become yet another source of stress, but instead a weekly chance to take a much needed break. And who knows, you might even find a new life passion or educational interest! So go forth and take advantage of these opportunities that you’ll only ever have in college.
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