Washingtonblade.com, Volume 50, Issue 18, May 3, 2019

Page 1

Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

Rainbow Families to meet this weekend as mission expands, PAGE 26

OVERTURNED CONVICTION, PLEA DEAL, REDUCED SENTENCE FOR KILLER OF BELOVED ACTIVIST DENNIS DOLINGER, PAGE 08

MAY 03, 2019 • VOLUM E 50 • I S S UE 18 • WA S HI N GTONB LAD E.CO M


STONEWALL 50

A MUSICAL CELEBRATION OF THE ANNIVERSARY OF THE SPARK THAT IGNITED THE PRIDE MOVEMENT

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VOLUME 50 ISSUE 18 ADDRESS

PO Box 53352 Washington DC 20009 PHONE

The murder of Dennis Dolinger in 1999 shocked the city. More recent developments in the case have gone unnoticed by friends and the media. PAGE 08

06 08

Looking back:

26

New era for Rainbow Families

50 years of the Blade

28

QUEERY: Nichelle Johnson/

New information surfaces in 1999 D.C. gay murder

10

DJ Honey 30

Judge finds probable cause

LGBT Fallen Heroes honored May 13

in gay murder case

32

Arts & Culture

11

A proud first for Howard County

33

Pride season fast approaching

12

Biden wins early LGBT support

34

For Dr. Ruth, it’s all about respect

amid lingering questions

36

Preserving our past

Senate confirms former Log Cabin

37

An angel’s latest assignment

chief to State Dept. post

38

It’s film festival season

HRC hosts global summit

39

All Stars: Stonewall Kickball

of LGBT activists

40

P!nk’s new album disappoints

17

Cannabis Culture

41

Closet charade

18

Gay prostate cancer

45

Are you looking for

13 14

survivors report issues 21

Viewpoint

the simple life? 46

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D.C. to roast Anita Bryant — May 1977 The Washington Blade published once a month in 1977. The May 1977 issue of the Blade had a front-page article that noted plans to roast Anita Bryant, who led the campaign against Dade County’s gay rights ordinance that voters ultimately repealed.

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New information surfaces in 1999 D.C. gay murder Conviction overturned in 2013 for man charged in activist’s death; guilty plea and reduced sentence in 2015 By LOU CHIBBARO JR. LCHIBBARO@WASHBLADE.COM

Dennis Dolinger was stabbed 25 times with a screwdriver in 1999 in a case that shocked the city. Washington Blade photo Michael Key

The murder of gay D.C. Advisory Neighborhood Commissioner Dennis Dolinger inside his Capitol Hill house on June 4, 1999 drew citywide attention. Then-Mayor Anthony Williams, former Mayor Marion Barry, and D.C. Congressional Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton were among the many city officials who attended a funeral mass held for Dolinger, 51, at St. Augustine Catholic Church. Several of the more than 100 friends and relatives who joined the public officials at the funeral described Dolinger as a beloved neighbor, the founder of his neighborhood Orange Hat crime-fighting group, a vocal advocate for neighborhood beautification efforts, and the gracious host of numerous dinner parties at his house at 1516 Potomac Ave., S.E. Shortly after Dolinger’s death friends and neighbors persuaded the D.C. Council to name a small triangular park located across the street from his house the Dennis Dolinger Memorial Park. A memorial stone with a plaque with Dolinger’s name and an inscription honoring him has been placed in the park. Friends and neighbors have said they were especially troubled over the irony that a dedicated advocate who worked hard to end crime in the neighborhood had his life taken in a brutal act of violence. The city’s medical examiner found that Dolinger had been stabbed 25 times in his head and neck with what was said to be a Phillips head screwdriver. A trail of blood was found leading from the basement of the house, where Dolinger’s body was found, to all three floors and in the front yard and sidewalk, court records show. A police report said

the house had been ransacked, with some of Dolinger’s belongings, including $1,000 in cash, missing. An analysis of the blood found throughout the house showed that it came from Dolinger and another person, indicating the killer was also cut during an apparent struggle. From the beginning, police said there were no signs of a forced entry into Dolinger’s house, indicating he most likely knew his attacker and invited the perpetrator into his house. When D.C. police announced the arrest in January 2000 of Arlington, Va., resident Raymond Anthony Jenkins, then 38, on a charge of first-degree murder while armed in connection with Dolinger’s death, fellow civic activists joined friends and family members in keeping close tabs on the start of court proceedings that they hoped would bring their loved one’s alleged killer to justice. The road to justice turned out to be a long one. With what seemed like countless twists and turns, the court proceedings against Jenkins dragged on until June of 2015, when he pleaded guilty to second-degree murder and was sentenced to 26 years minus the 15 years he had already served since his 2000 arrest. Nearly all of Dolinger’s friends, fellow activists and family members, including news media outlets that reported on the case, assumed it had ended in 2006. That’s when a D.C. Superior Court jury convicted Jenkins on three counts of first-degree murder while armed, armed burglary, assault with intent to rob while armed, and possession of a prohibited weapon, court records show. Court records show that on Oct. 12, 2006, Superior Court Judge Rhonda Reid Winston sentenced Jenkins to 30 years in prison, bringing about what Dolinger’s friends thought was the end of the case. But in a little-noticed development, just under seven years later, in September 2013, the D.C. Court of Appeals overturned Jenkins’ conviction in response to an appeal by the defense and ordered that a new trial be held. The Court of Appeals ruled that the trial judge incorrectly denied a defense request to cross examine at trial the laboratory analysts that helped police identify Jenkins as a suspect by matching his DNA with that of the DNA in blood found in Dolinger’s house at the crime scene. Instead, Judge Reid Winston agreed with prosecutors’ decision to bring in as an expert witness Dr. Frank Baechtel, a forensic examiner and the head of the FBI’s DNA analysis laboratories, to testify about the findings of the DNA tests conducted by the

analysts that work for him and who did the actual testing. At that time, the FBI rather than D.C.’s medical examiner’s office performed DNA related testing for D.C. police in the investigation of crimes. Court records show that Reid Winston told defense attorneys they could subpoena the laboratory analysts as defense witnesses, but the defense chose not to do so. The appeals court ruled that regardless of how it came about, the fact that the defense was unable to cross examine the analysts that conducted the DNA testing rather than Baechtel, who testified about the DNA findings at the trial, violated Jenkins’ Sixth Amendment constitutional right to confront his “accusers” at his trial. Court records show that Jenkins was first linked to Dolinger’s murder when D.C. police sent the DNA information from the blood found at Dolinger’s house from an unidentified person – which they knew was not Dolinger’s DNA – to other states, including Virginia, to seek a possible match. Since Jenkins had an arrest record in Virginia on a burglary related charge, Virginia authorities had his DNA information in their criminal records database, court records show. The “cold hit” match of Jenkins’ DNA with that from the blood found in Dolinger’s house enabled police to identify Jenkins as a suspect in the Dolinger murder. Court records show police obtained corroborating information linking Jenkins to Dolinger through witnesses from the Dupont Circle area and the Dupont Circle gay bar The Fireplace, where witnesses said Jenkins was known to hang out. Witnesses told police that Dolinger also was known as a customer at The Fireplace, and that may have been where he first met Jenkins. At his 2006 trial, a witness named Anthony Scott, who knew Jenkins from the Dupont Circle area, testified that on the day after Dolinger’s murder he saw Jenkins and noticed he was “all scratched up” on his face, hands, and arm. Scott testified that Jenkins was carrying more than $1,000 in cash, a diamond ring, and a “bunch of little gold chains,” items that police believe were taken from Dolinger’s house on the day of the murder. Scott also testified, according to court records, that in the time he knew Jenkins prior to the murder he saw that Jenkins “always” kept a Phillips head screwdriver inside his backpack. Court records show that Jenkins remained in jail after the appeals court overturned his 2006 murder conviction in 2013. The records

show the case appeared to be stalled until 2015, when prosecutors offered Jenkins a plea bargain deal as an alternative to another trial. The proposed deal called for him to plead guilty to a lower charge of second-degree murder and one count of first-degree burglary. The records show that through his lawyers he agreed to the offer, waived his right to another trial, and pleaded guilty on June 18, 2015 to the two lesser charges. An online search conducted by the Blade for press coverage of the developments in the Dolinger case since the time Jenkins’ conviction was overturned in 2013 found that only one specialized news outlet – The Blog of Legal Times – reported that Jenkins’ conviction had been overturned in 2013. Interviews over the past two weeks with people who knew Dolinger found that none of them knew about the overturned conviction, the plea bargain agreement, or the subsequent new sentence handed down by Judge Reid Winston on June 18, 2015, the same day Jenkins pleaded guilty. Court records show that Reid Winston sentenced Jenkins to 20 years to life on the second-degree murder charge but suspended all but 21 years. The records show she sentenced Jenkins to 5 to 15 years for the first-degree burglary charge, and suspended all but five years. According to the records, the judge ordered that the two sentences run consecutively so that the total sentence came to 26 years. However, the records show she gave Jenkins credit for the 15 years he had already served in jail since the time of his arrest for the Dolinger murder in January 2000. That meant he had 11 more years to serve at the time of the 2015 sentencing. A spokesperson for the Federal Bureau of Prisons told the Blade in an email this week that Jenkins is currently an inmate at the Federal Correctional Institution at Petersburg, which is located in Hopewell, Va. The spokesperson said the projected date of Jenkins’ release from prison is Sept. 7, 2026. The spokesperson, who did not disclose his or her name, said in their email that “federal sentencing law allows inmates to earn up to 54 days good time credit for each year served.” The spokesperson didn’t say whether or how much good time credit Jenkins may have earned since he has been in the federal prison system. Since the closing nearly 20 years ago of D.C.’s long-term prison located in Lorton, Va., all people sentenced to prison in the D.C. court system serve their sentence in the federal prison system.

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Judge finds probable cause in gay murder case Victim found stabbed 47 times in D.C. apartment By LOU CHIBBARO JR. LCHIBBARO@WASHBLADE.COM

VONGELL LUGO was stabbed to death on Jan. 6.

A D.C. Superior Court judge on April 26 ruled that prosecutors have presented sufficient evidence to establish probable cause that a 26-year-old U.S. Navy hospital corpsman fatally stabbed gay retail and language services manager Vongell Lugo inside Lugo’s D.C. apartment on Jan. 6. Judge Juliet McKenna issued her ruling during a preliminary hearing in which a D.C. police homicide detective testified that Navy Corpsman 3rd Class Collin J. Potter allegedly stabbed Lugo as many as 47 times in the upper body and genital area shortly after Lugo invited him into his apartment at 2844 Wisconsin Ave., N.W. near the Washington National Cathedral. Potter has been charged with seconddegree murder while armed in connection with Lugo’s death. McKenna said her finding of probable cause cleared the way for the case to go before a grand jury, which court observers say they expect will hand down an indictment that could elevate the charge to first-degree murder. Assistant U.S. Attorney Nebiyu Feleke, the lead prosecutor in the case, stated at the April 26 hearing that Potter, through his attorneys, rejected a plea bargain offer made by prosecutors calling for him to plead guilty to second-degree murder in exchange for the government not seeking a first-degree murder charge before a grand jury. In his testimony, Homicide Det. Tony Covington reiterated details of the case included in a police arrest affidavit filed in court at the time of Potter’s arrest in

January. The affidavit says officers saw Potter fully nude standing over Lugo’s nude body, which was lying on the floor in the hall outside Lugo’s apartment, when police arrived on the scene. The affidavit says police came to Lugo’s apartment building after a neighbor called 911 to report hearing what sounded like a violent struggle inside Lugo’s apartment and hearing a male voice shout, “Please stop, please stop” and, “Please no, please no.” When Covington recited that part of the affidavit Lugo’s mother, who was in the courtroom along with about 25 of Lugo’s family members and friends, began to cry. Several of the family members and friends in the courtroom participated in a candlelight vigil in Lugo’s honor held Jan. 11 in a small park across the street from his apartment building. The affidavit says emergency medical personnel pronounced Lugo dead on the scene on the floor in the hall outside his apartment. Covington said police believe Potter dragged Lugo outside the apartment door after allegedly fatally stabbing him inside the apartment. “Defendant Potter had blood visible on various areas of his body, to include his arms and feet, however he did not have any apparent injuries,” the affidavit says. In his testimony Det. Covington reiterated the affidavit’s assertion that Potter referred to Lugo as his “girlfriend” and as “she” when officers first approached him outside the apartment. The affidavit says that when questioned at the police homicide office Potter initially said “he remembered performing oral sex on a male, he did not know why and it could not have been the result of having ingested alcohol, and he later saw that he had blood on him that was not his own, but did not know the source of the blood.” According to the affidavit, after being read his Miranda rights Potter declined to answer further questions without having a lawyer present. In presenting information not initially disclosed in the affidavit, Covington testified at the April 26 hearing that the police investigation found that Potter and Lugo met on the night of the murder at the Black Whiskey bar at 1410 14th St., N.W. in D.C. Covington, however, said the investigation has not determined whether Potter and Lugo knew each other prior to the time they met up at the Black Whiskey on the night of the murder. Covington said witnesses told police that Potter had been drinking that night in Virginia with people he knew from the Quantico Marine base, where Potter was stationed. The detective said witnesses told

police Potter told his friends in Virginia he wanted to go to D.C. to continue drinking. A friend of Lugo’s told the Washington Blade that Lugo, who was openly gay, liked to hang out at straight bars and the Black Whiskey was one of the bars he patronized. In response to questions by prosecutor Feleke, Covington said one witness told police Potter was seen buying two drinks at the Black Whiskey on the night of the murder and giving one of them to Lugo. Other witnesses saw Potter and Lugo talking to each other over their drinks before they were seen leaving the Black Whiskey and entering a car, Covington testified. He said surveillance cameras at Lugo’s apartment building showed that the two men entered the building together and entered Lugo’s apartment in the early morning hours of Sunday, Jan. 6. Covington testified that police found two kitchen knives with traces of blood on them inside Lugo’s apartment, with one of them in a sink with water running from the faucet. The two knives are being introduced as the murder weapons. In response to questions by defense attorney Matthew Davies, Covington said police have no known motive for why Potter allegedly stabbed Lugo to death in the apartment. In response to further questions by Davies, Covington said police have no evidence to indicate that anyone else was present at Lugo’s apartment at the time of the murder. In concluding arguments, Davies told the judge the defense doesn’t believe prosecutors established probable cause that Potter committed the murder. He said the evidence cannot rule out the assertion by the defense that the murder was committed by someone else who had access to Lugo’s apartment. “We don’t know who else was in that apartment and who else was in there and left,” he said. Prosecutor Feleke said the government has presented “ample evidence” to show Potter and Lugo were the only two in the apartment at the time of the murder. He noted that Potter himself told police at the time they arrived on the scene that he and Lugo were the only two in the apartment that night. “I do find that that the government has established substantial probability that Mr. Potter committed second-degree murder,” said Judge Mckenna in handing down her ruling. “The evidence that the government presented is incredibly strong,” she said. Mckenna denied a request by the defense that Potter be released into a halfway house while awaiting trial and approved Feleke’s request that he remain held in jail as he has since the time of his arrest.

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A proud first for Howard County LGBTQ Pride festival set for June 29 at Centennial Park

Lesbian magazine hung by ‘noose’ from D.C. light pole By LOU CHIBBARO JR. LCHIBBARO@WASHBLADE.COM

By STEVE CHARING

Howard County Executive CALVIN BALL announced plans for the first Pride celebration in the county. Photo courtesy Ball

Copies of Tagg magazine were tied to a rope and hung. Photo by Popville courtesy Tagg

Maryland’s Howard County will host its first Pride celebration in June. “This year we will finally celebrate Pride right here in Howard County,” said Howard County Executive Calvin Ball who along with the Howard County chapter of PFLAG is cohosting the historic event. After a year of planning by members of the local community with support from several key sexual and gender minority advocacy organizations along with an affirming and inclusive county government, the dream of holding the first-ever LGBTQ Pride Celebration in Howard County is about to become a reality. Coinciding with the 50th anniversary of the famous Stonewall uprising, HoCo Pride, as it is known, will take place on Saturday, June 29. The festival will be held from 11 a.m.-5 p.m. at Centennial Park, 10000 Clarksville Pike in Ellicott City. Indeed, planners of the inaugural event in Howard County have embraced its historic significance in the motto “Remember/Resist/Rejoice.” Says County Executive Ball, “At the 2019 Pride Festival, we will remember those who fought for justice. We will resist those who would turn back the clock on equal rights, and we will rejoice because of the LGBTQ+ love we have in our community.” This motto will manifest itself at HoCo Pride with an interactive Historical Art Wall consisting of a four-panel display, according to Alisha Tronetti, the display’s coordinator. Three of the four panels will depict past events that are significant to the LGBTQ+ community, which have occurred in the U.S. and in Maryland. “There will be space for attendees to add their own history into the wall,” says Tronetti. “This will be the Remember and Rejoice section that reflects both the good and the bad that has happened to our community. The fourth panel will be the Resist panel, where attendees will add where we think we need to go still, and what we still need to do to fight for our equality.” In addition, a memorial recognizing transgender people who have been murdered since last June is planned. It will be situated near the Historical Art Wall. There is a sizeable LGBTQ+ population in Howard County, and four decades ago it became one of the first jurisdictions in the state to enact protections based on sexual orientation in the areas of employment, housing and public accommodations. In 2011, the county added similar protections based on gender identity. Noting the diversity and the numerous accomplishments for LGBT individuals in Howard County, leaders believed the time was right to celebrate Pride. “Howard County [is] such a population center for the state but we don’t have an event to highlight the diversity we supposedly treasure here,” Jumel Howard, chairperson of the HoCo Pride Planning Committee and vice president of Howard County’s PFLAG chapter told the Baltimore Sun last June while the planning for HoCo Pride was in its nascent stages. “This is a great way to not just show how much we care for the LGBT community [but] to educate the community on some of the issues that affect the LGBT community,” he said. The festival, which is free to the public, will feature food, games, entertainment, speakers, art, and community-based vendors, at this family-friendly event. There will be Youth Pride spaces and Elder Pride spaces set aside from which to enjoy the festivities. The HoCo Pride website, howardcountypride.org, provides information on how to donate to the event and to volunteer.

LOCAL NE WS • MAY 03, 2019 • WA SHINGTO N BL A DE . COM • 11

D.C. police are investigating an incident listed as a hate crime in which an unidentified person or persons tied a rope around several copies of Tagg magazine, which covers news of interest to the local lesbian and queer community and is owned by a woman of color, and hung the fastened magazines from a light pole in the heart of the city’s Adams Morgan neighborhood. The incident was first reported on April 25 on the website of the D.C. blog POPville, which posted a photo of the hanging magazines, which themselves included photos of four African-American women on the front cover. A POPville reader, who posted the report, said the magazines were first seen hanging from the pole on April 25 in front of the Sun Trust Bank at 18th Street and Columbia Road, N.W. In a statement released on Monday, Tagg magazine called the knot binding the rope around the magazines a “noose,” which it said was a symbol of hate. “A noose symbolizes years of hate and the death of thousands of Black people in this country,” Tagg’s owner and editor, Ebone F. Bell, said in the statement. “As a Black lesbian, this incident is more than disturbing,” she said. “I believe there is a reason Tagg was a target, and I believe there is a reason the Enterprising Women issue with people of color on the cover was a target.” She was referring Tagg magazine’s MarchApril issue, which includes a feature story about lesbians involved in business that the magazine designated as Enterprising Women of 2019. Lt. Brett Parson, who oversees the D.C. police Special Liaison Division, including the department’s LGBT Liaison Unit, said the incident was being investigated by the Third District Detective’s Unit. He said the LGBT Liaison Unit took the initial report about the incident. Parson said the incident is being listed as a violation of a little-known D.C. law that prohibits

the public display of nooses, swastikas, emblems, or other symbols that, among other things, according to the law, “cause another person to fear for his or her personal safety.” He said the police investigation would seek to determine whether the knot fastening the Tagg magazines onto a rope could be interpreted as a noose. “I think it is troubling that a rope fashioned in a way that could resemble a noose – whether it is a noose or not is up to whoever looks at it,” Parson said. “But it certainly to some people looks like a noose wrapped around an African-American lesbian magazine and hung on a light pole is quite disturbing,” he said. “That’s why we’re investigating it as a crime,” said Parson. “But it remains to be seen if it fact it meets the definition of a noose, which has a specific type of knot.” Bell told the Blade she believes the knot was a noose. “I believe the person who did it just didn’t know how to tie a proper noose, but I do believe that was the intent,” she said. She said she learned about the incident from one of the women whose picture is on the cover of the Tagg magazines that were hanging from the pole. According to Bell, the woman who called her is a regular reader of the POPville blog and saw the blog posting with the photo of herself on the hanging magazines. Bell said the rope appeared from the photo to be tied to a place on the pole higher than the average person could reach without somehow having a way to get to the upper part of the pole. She said she was hopeful that nearby video surveillance cameras might have an image of the person who hung the rope on the pole. Parson said he could not comment on any matter related to possible evidence in an ongoing police investigation. Police are asking anyone with information about the incident to call the Third District Detectives office at 202-673-6918.


Biden wins early LGBT support amid lingering questions Some concerned over treatment of Anita Hill By MICHAEL K. LAVERS MLAVERS@WASHBLADE.COM

Former Vice President JOE BIDEN won many LGBT fans for his embrace of same-sex marriage. Washington Blade photo Michael Key

Former Vice President Joe Biden’s announcement that he is running for president has sparked a mixed reaction among activists and LGBT Democrats. “From his support for inclusive hate crimes protections in the U.S. Senate to his leadership on marriage equality as vice president, Joe Biden has been a vocal champion of equality,” Sarah McBride, a transgender woman from Delaware who is a spokesperson for the Human Rights Campaign, told the Washington Blade on Tuesday. McBride, who in 2016 became the first openly trans person to speak at a major U.S. party convention when she spoke at the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia, noted Biden “placed LGBTQ equality at the center” of the Biden Foundation that he and his wife, Dr. Jill Biden, created after he left office. McBride also said Biden was “consistently using his unique platform to speak out on international LGBTQ rights, family acceptance and transgender equality.” “Biden joins a field of trailblazers and pro-equality champions seeking the Democratic nomination who are exciting LGBTQ voters around the country,” McBride told the Blade. Biden in 2012 publicly endorsed marriage rights for same-sex couples before then-President Obama. Biden on June 16, 2016, traveled to Orlando, Fla., with Obama after the Pulse nightclub massacre and met with victims’ families. Biden less than four months later described LGBT rights as “the civil rights issue of our time” during a speech at the U.N. in New York. “Discrimination against anyone for their

sexual orientation and gender is anathema to most basic values,” said Biden. Biden in 2017 condemned the antiLGBT crackdown in Chechnya. The Biden Foundation, which suspended its operations after Biden officially entered the race on April 25, in August 2018 launched a campaign that sought to promote acceptance of LGBT youth among their families and communities. The Bidens a few weeks later spoke at HRC’s annual national dinner in D.C. “I’ll always be thankful that Vice President Biden forced Obama’s hand on supporting marriage equality before the 2012 election,” said Ryan Davis, a marketing executive who lives in Brooklyn, N.Y. “Without Biden and Obama’s support, it’s unlikely we’d have won all four of the states that had marriage equality on the ballot in 2012.” Former U.S. Ambassador to the Dominican Republic James “Wally” Brewster and his husband, Bob Satawake, have also said they will support Biden. “The vice president had my back personally and I have sat beside him with other leaders around the world,” wrote Brewster on his Facebook page after Biden declared his candidacy. “I have watched him defend those who don’t have a voice. I have also seen him be tough when needed.” Biden has declined numerous interview requests the Blade has made in the past. He also did not specifically refer to LGBT rights in his campaign announcement. Biden evoked the 2017 white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Va., that left Heather Heyer dead and prompted President Trump to “condemn in the strongest possible terms this egregious display of hatred, bigotry and violence on many sides.” Biden at the HRC dinner said he “could not remain silent” over the issue. “We are in a fight for America’s soul and we have leaders ... who at the time when that occurred, when these guys were accompanied by white supremacists and Ku Klux Klan and those who objected, making a comparison, saying, ‘There are good people in both groups,’” he said. “What has become of us? Our children are listening and our silence is complicity.” Biden entered the race amid questions over his previous interactions with women. The former vice president in 1991 was chair of the Senate Judiciary Committee when it held a hearing on Anita Hill’s allegations that now U.S. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas subjected her to sexual harassment. Biden on Monday told ABC’s Robin

Roberts that Hill was “not treated well.” The New York Times reported Hill felt “deeply unsatisfied” after she spoke with Biden before he declared his candidacy. “I still haven’t forgotten or forgiven Joe Biden’s treatment of Anita Hill,” Monica Roberts, a trans activist of color and blogger in Houston, told the Blade on Wednesday. “It will affect his campaign for the 2020 Democratic nomination.” Roberts, who said she likes U.S. Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), added she wants “a younger Democrat in that chair.” “We have plenty to choose from in this presidential election cycle,” Roberts told the Blade. Rev. Merrick Moise, a trans man of color and activist in Baltimore, said Biden “reminds me of the working-class men in my life as a kid in Queens.” “Yes, they could be bawdy or crude, but they really have hearts of gold,” Moise told the Blade. “He needs to tell sexual and gender minorities what he will not only do for us, but how he will partner with us to move progressive policy forward and encourage the country to recognize our rights to live as free and equal citizens,” he added.

Biden a ‘formidable candidate’ Polls indicate Biden became the frontrunner against Harris, South Bend (Ind.) Mayor Pete Buttigieg, U.S. Sens. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) and Cory Booker (D-N.J.) and Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) and the other Democratic presidential candidates. “Truthfully, he might be the strongest candidate to beat the current occupant of the White House,” Moise told the Blade. “Time will tell.” Earl Fowlkes, chair of the DNC’s LGBT Caucus and a former president of the Gertrude Stein Democratic Club, agreed. “Joe Biden is a formidable candidate for the Democratic nomination for president,” he told the Blade on Wednesday. “His commitment to LGBTQ rights is without question and he has a long record of supporting issues that are important to women and communities of color.” “His entry into the nomination process will make the Democratic primary even more interesting than it already is,” added Fowlkes. The Blade has reached out to Biden’s campaign for comment for this story.

12 • WA S HI NGTO N B LAD E.CO M • M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9 • N AT IO N AL N EWS


Senate confirms former Log Cabin chief to State Dept.post Mayor Pete Buttigieg on April 29 met with Rev. Al Sharpton at a restaurant in Manhattan’s Harlem neighborhood. Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

Buttigieg meets Sharpton in NYC

The Senate confirmed R. CLARKE COOPER to a senior State Department position. Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

With little opposition, the U.S. Senate confirmed on Tuesday a former head of Log Cabin Republicans instrumental in finding Republican votes to repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” to a high-ranking State Department position. R. Clarke Cooper, who’s gay, was confirmed as assistant secretary of state for political-military affairs by a vote of 90-8 nearly a full year after President Trump nominated him in June 2018. The position of assistant of secretary of state for political-military affairs is charged with linking the Defense Department with the State Department in areas such as international security, military operations and defense strategy. According to Inside Defense, Sen. Ed Markey (D-Mass.) placed a hold on Cooper’s nomination in the Senate Foreign Relations Committee over objections to the Trump administration allowing organizations to post blueprints for 3D-printed guns online. It wasn’t immediately clear why Markey lifted his hold on the nomination to allow a vote. The senators who voted against Cooper were Markey as well as Cory Booker (D-N.J.), Debbie Stabenow (D-Mich.), Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.), Gary Peters (D-Mich.), Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.), Mazie Hirono (D-Hawaii) and Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.). Not voting were Sens. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.) and Mike Lee (R-Utah). Many of the senators are either 2020 presidential hopefuls or have a history of voting against Trump nominees based on general objections to the president, who has built a long anti-LGBT record in the White House, and his administration. Under Cooper’s tenure at Log Cabin between 2010 and 2012, the organization oversaw a lawsuit challenging “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and assisted with legislative efforts to convince Republicans to vote to repeal the military’s gay ban. Under Cooper’s leadership, Log Cabin also endorsed Mitt Romney for president in 2012 after he met with Cooper and gay former Arizona Rep. Jim Kolbe at a Virginia farmhouse. Cooper most recently served as director of intelligence planning for Joint Special Operations Command’s Joint Inter-Agency Task Force in the National Capital Region. A combat veteran and member of the U.S. Army Reserve, Cooper’s active duty assignments included tours with United States Africa Command, Special Operations Command Africa, Joint Special Operations Task Force Trans-Sahara, and Special Operations Command Central, according to his bio. Cooper is now one of a handful of openly gay officials in the Trump administration. The highest ranking is U.S. ambassador to Germany Richard Grenell, who recently announced an initiative to decriminalize homosexuality in the more than 70 countries where it’s illegal. CHRIS JOHNSON

N ATI O NAL NE WS • MAY 03, 2019 • WA SHINGTON BL A DE . COM • 13

Pete Buttigieg on Monday met with Rev. Al Sharpton at a restaurant in Manhattan’s Harlem neighborhood. A press release Sharpton’s organization, the National Action Network, released before the meeting said the two men “will discuss the need to confront homophobia in the faith community as well as the mayor’s policy agenda for the black community in Indiana and around the country.” Buttigieg, who is the mayor of South Bend, Ind., is one of more than a dozen Democrats who are running for president. Buttigieg, who married his husband, Chasten Buttigieg, in 2018, would be the first openly gay man elected president if he were to win. His meeting with Sharpton took place less than a week after Rev. Franklin Graham said Buttigieg should repent because he is gay. Buttigieg has also faced questions over the impact his administration’s policies have had on South Bend’s black residents. In related news, a poll has found 70 percent of voters would be open to voting for a gay man as U.S. president. However, that same poll reveals a majority of voters — 52 percent — believe the United States isn’t ready to elected a gay man to the White House. The Quinnipiac poll, published Tuesday, found 70 percent of voters — including a plurality of Republicans — are willing to vote for a gay president, although 23 percent said they would not and 7 percent said they didn’t know. For Democrats, 85 percent said they’d be willing to support for gay presidential candidate, although 11 percent said they would not and 4 percent said they didn’t know. For Republicans, 46 percent said they’d vote for a gay president compared to the 45 percent who said they would not and 9 percent said they didn’t know. But the situation changes when voters are asked whether they think the United States is ready for a president. Only 36 percent say that’s the case, compared 53 who say no and 12 percent who say they don’t. MICHAEL K. LAVERS

Dems refuse to speak at anti-LGBT group’s summit Six Democratic presidential candidates have declined an invitation to speak at an anti-LGBT group’s summit in Iowa. NBC News on Monday reported U.S. Sens. Cory Booker (D-N.J.) and Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), former Texas Congressman Beto O’Rourke and South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg have all declined invitations to speak at the Family Leader’s summit that is scheduled to take place on July 12. “I welcome any opportunity to talk about how faith guides me, but I cannot — in good conscience — attend an event put on by an organization that preaches bigotry and sows hate against the LGBTQ community,” wrote Booker on Twitter. “That’s why I am declining an invitation to the Family Leader’s July 12 summit.” Buttigieg press secretary Chris Meagher told NBC News the campaign “will be declining this invitation.” The Family Leader on its website says it also invited former Vice President Biden and U.S. Sens. Bernie Sanders (D-Vt.) and Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) to the summit. Media reports indicate Sanders and Warren have also declined the invitation. “The Family Leadership Summit traditionally extends invitations to national leaders from the church, culture and government to speak to Iowa’s faith voters,” reads a press release on the organization’s website. “In the past, those invitations have included prominent figures from both political parties.” Bob Vander Plaats, the group’s CEO, is among the country’s most prominent social conservatives. The Family Leader asked presidential candidates to sign a pledge ahead of the 2012 Iowa caucuses that included a statement against marriage rights for same-sex couples. Vander Plaats has also made controversial comments about homosexuality. MICHAEL K. LAVERS


HRC hosts global summit of LGBT activists More than two-dozen LGBT activists from around the world participated in the Human Rights Campaign’s annual Global Innovative Advocacy Summit that took place last week in D.C. Activists from Barbados, Mexico, Ecuador, Argentina, Ukraine, Pakistan, Malawi and other countries took part in workshops and attended events that included a Tuesday reception at Spanish Ambassador to the U.S. Santiago Cabanas Ansorena’s official residence in Northwest D.C. Wanuri Kahiu, director of “Rafiki,” a Kenyan film about two women who fell in love with each other, spoke with the activists on Wednesday. “At a time when so many LGBTQ people’s lives are at risk around the globe, the ability of advocates to collaborate on innovative tools advancing basic human rights and LGBTQ equality is crucially important,” said HRC Director of Global Leadership Jay Gilliam in a blog post. “We are thrilled to welcome these advocates whose commitment to advancing LGBTQ equality in some of the world’s most challenging places is truly remarkable.” The summit began a day after Volodymyr Zelenskiy, a Ukrainian television comedian, overwhelmingly won the second round of his country’s presidential election. Ruslana Panukhnyk, director of KyivPride, which organizes the annual Pride celebrations in the Ukrainian capital of Kiev, told the Blade on Wednesday that she and other LGBTI activists in her country “don’t know what to expect from” Zelenskiy because he “doesn’t have any platform or strategy.” Panukhnyk nevertheless said the summit has left her feeling “inspired … and motivated to work.” Damián Cabrera, founder of the Puerto Rico LGBTQ Health Services Directory, agreed. “What has been the best part of this experience is to learn about everyone’s experience,” he told the Blade on Wednesday. “This helps put me in the perspective of watching how we can advance in Puerto Rico as a country.” Cabrera said the Puerto Rico LGBTQ Health Services Directory “was born from the need” for health care providers “who know how to care for the LGBTI community.” He also acknowledged to the Blade that Hurricanes Maria and Irma that struck Puerto Rico in 2017 made LGBTI Puerto Ricans’ vulnerability to violence, discrimination and poverty “even more visible.” “It is a very slow process,” said Cabrera, referring to post-Maria recovery efforts. “A disaster like this doesn’t affect everyone the same.” The summit took place against the backdrop of continued outrage over the Trump administration’s record on LGBT-specific issues from HRC and other advocacy groups. The White House’s overall foreign policy has also sparked widespread criticism. The Trump administration in February announced gay U.S. Ambassador to Germany Richard Grenell will lead an initiative that encourages countries to decriminalize consensual same-sex sexual relations. Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro on March 19 reiterated his opposition to LGBT rights when he spoke alongside President Trump during a press conference in the White House Rose Garden. Grenell and the State Department have both criticized the provision of Brunei’s new penal code that calls for the death penalty for anyone convicted of consensual same-sex sexual relations. Panukhnyk told the Blade that Trump “is a big concern for the global LGBT community.” “We have a lot of questions,” she said. “We still have a lot of questions and they are not answered yet.” Cabrera echoed San Juan Mayor Carmen Yulín Cruz and others who have sharply criticized the Trump administration’s response to Maria. “This is one more example of a colonial violence,” Cabrera told the Blade, referring to Puerto Rico’s status as a U.S. commonwealth. “We are truly good citizens to be exploited and to give to the U.S., but when we are seen as different when we are in need during a situation like this.” MICHAEL K. LAVERS

OAS chief: Countries in Americas should expand LGBT rights

Organization of American States Secretary General LUIS ALMAGRO speaks at New York University Washington’s Brademas Center on April 24. He said countries in the Americas have an obligation to expand rights to their LGBT citizens. Photo by Polly Terzian/NYU Washington

Organization of American States Secretary General Luis Almagro on Wednesday said countries in the Americas have an obligation to extend rights to their LGBT citizens. “We expect that the violence in the whole continent against LGBTIQ people, the discrimination that they suffer is resolved,” he told the Blade at New York University Washington’s Abramson Family Auditorium in downtown Washington. “We want every country to resolve this discrimination that LGBTIQ people suffer. We want every country to investigate and to resolve any matter of LGBTI peoples and communities … We want every country to provide solutions for how the basic principles of human rights can be made operative in order to resolve these issues.” Almagro, a former Uruguayan diplomat, spoke about LGBTI rights in the Americas during a discussion that Geovanny Vicente Romero, a political analyst who has contributed to the Blade, moderated. The Blade asked Almagro about Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro, who continues to face criticism from activists over his rhetoric against LGBTI Brazilians and other minority groups. The Blade also asked Almagro about the Inter-American Court of Human Rights, a Costa Rica-based court the OAS created in 1979 to enforce provisions of the American Convention on Human Rights. The court in 2018 issued a landmark ruling that recognizes same-sex marriage and transgender rights in the Western Hemisphere. The decision is legally binding in the 20 countries — Argentina, Barbados, Bolivia, Brazil, Chile, Colombia,

Costa Rica, the Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Guatemala, Haiti, Honduras, Mexico, Nicaragua, Panama, Paraguay, Peru, Suriname and Uruguay — in the Americas that currently recognize the American Convention on Human Rights. Ecuador’s highest court last month heard oral arguments in a case that would extend marriage rights to same-sex couples in the country. Chilean President Sebastián Piñera in January signed a law that allows trans people over 14 to legally change their name and gender without surgery. The Chilean Supreme Court late last year ruled marriage for same-sex couples is a human right. The Movement for Homosexual Integration and Liberation, a Chilean advocacy group, has said Piñera’s government has “reneged” in a 2016 agreement it reached with Chile in response to a lawsuit filed on behalf of three same-sex couples who want to get married in the country. “We want every country to resolve the discrimination that LGBTQ people suffer,” Almagro told the Blade. Almagro said the OAS has a Department of Social Inclusion and has installed gender-neutral bathrooms in its D.C. headquarters. He told the Blade he marched in Vancouver’s 2018 Pride parade and plans to participate in this year’s Capital Pride Venezuela’s political and economic crisis, the ongoing unrest in Nicaragua, Cuba’s human rights record and Haiti are among the other issues that Almagro discussed. MICHAEL K. LAVERS

14 • WA S HI N GTONB L A D E.CO M • M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9 • IN T ER N AT IO N AL N EWS


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M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9 • WA SHINGTONBLA DE.COM • 17


First Gay-Bi Men’s Prostate Cancer Treatment Study Launched

By Morgan Wright Bishops. Among other prohibitions on Gay prostate services, Dignity hospitals ban abortions Being diagnosed with prostate cancer can be very frightening. There’s the fear unless the mother’s life is at risk, in vitro cancer and stigma that goessurvivors with having cancer, plus treatment can have major effects on fertilization and physician-assisted death. men’s sexual and urinary function. When you’re gay or bisexual, you can also feel Twenty-four of Dignity’s 39 hospitals report very isolated both fromissues other gay men and fromprohibit straight men with prostate cancer. contraception services and As Dr. Simon Rosser, principal investigator of gender-confirming the Restore study, explains, “When care for transgender my husband was diagnosed, I couldn’t believe so little was known about prostate people, such as hormone therapy and MINNEAPOLIS — Two-thirds of gay cancer gayreported men. After the most surgical common cancer affecting men, procedures, the Beeall reports. and biinmen fairall, to this poorissexual including us. But we don’t treatment talk about it,for many clinics very heterosexual, andUCSF The feel affiliation would not keep functioning following for many of us, prostate cancer carries a stigma. We can feel old, sexually broken, from performing such procedures at prostate cancer, Uro Today reports citing and Now, that’s about change. its own medical center and outpatient its alone.” study. Prostate cancer is to the second most common cancer in gay and bi men.

clinics, and both entities would remain

largest online cancer support group.

refer patients to other facilities when

Gay and bi men have worse EPIC

For opponents of the plan, the issue

Researchers at the University of Minnesota teamed up with gay andwith bisexual independent. UC doctors practicing For an online survey, 193 gay and have men with prostate cancerprostate to develop a rehabilitation program designed privileges at Dignity wouldspecifibe free to bisexual men with cancer cally our community. discuss all treatment options and could werefor recruited from North America’s

Are you a gay or bisexual man who has been diagnosed with prostate cancer? Join the first study on prostate cancer rehabilitation designed for and by our community.

Visit restorestudy.umn.edu to learn more and take the eligibility survey Email: restorestudy@umn.edu Phone: 612-568-8860 NIH grant #1RO1CA218657-01

The Restore I team spent years interviewing gay andthe bisexual men with prosnecessary, Bee reports. Sexual functioning was two measured using tate ThoseProstate interviews, combined with a comprehensive survey, documentBut they would have to abide by thecancer. Expanded Cancer Index ed the effects(EPIC) of treatment. found gaycare andrestrictions bi men have similar Dignity’s while practicing Composite and a They tailored Gaythat while at Dignity hospitals. Sexual Functioning Inventory. challenges to heterosexual men, there are some additional challenges as well. boils down clear-cut principle: urinary hormonal function and worse Most menand reported urinary incontinence, with almost half ofto thea participants report- How canerections, a publicnohospital that and has difbeen a hormonal bother, but better sexual function ing some urine problems during sex. Weak or no ejaculation, in women’s health care andthat medical and better scores than published ficulties in receptive sex were almostnorms. universal leader problems. It also became clear services forsymptoms. the gay and In the inventory, two-thirds of participants there was no standard treatment for these very common Whiletransgender some population partner private system described their sexual treatments, functioning,the postdoctors did recommend recommendations were allwith overathe board. notand onlydoesn’t denies such but also treatment, as fair to poor. As Dr. Rosser notes, “We Only need22 to percent know what that works workservices in helping casts them as immoral, thethat Beeworks reports. reported erections sufficient insertive men restore their function. An for evidence-based, rehabilitation program anal researchers said. will transform treatment.” for gaysex, and bisexual men

Fair to poor health care common for trans patients

For receptive anal sex, one-third met criteria for study, anodyspareunia, theanclinical The resulting RESTORE II, evaluation of the treatment of prostate cancer term for pain while bottoming. side effects in gay and bisexual More men, than is now recruiting participants. half reported urination problems during at orgasm. Erectile difficulties were Tosex Dr.orRosser, this is among the most exciting studies funded by NIH. “It’s both common, severe and a reason cited for not and honor and truly exciting to be part of the first study in an area. This kind of reusing condoms. search really takes a team effort. Our team includes a urologist, oncologist, urinary Sexual functioning significantly specialist, gay sex experts, computer scientist, psychologist, statistician, health predicted long-term mental and physical CHICAGO — The transgender communication folk, online interventionist, social worker, support network, nurse health. Gay and bi men scored significantly population is affected by diminished and clinician. Together, we have developed a start-of-the art, rehabilitation curworse on mental health and better on health-related quality of life more than riculum based on gay bisexual norms. men’s experience in treatment. Now, we need physical health thanand published cisgender individuals, according to a toSexual test if and how it works. recovery after prostate cancer recent study published in JAMA Internal treatment is problematic for most gay Medicine, Healio reports. Aand major in prostate cancer more treatment is that rehabilitation takes time. For bi challenge men. Research to develop The CDC introduced an optional Sexual that reason, participants in this study will be followed for two years. As is common effective sexual recovery, tailored to the Orientation and Gender Identity module inneeds a randomized controlled half the participants will receive newSurveillance treatof gay men treatedstudy, for prostate to the Behavioral Risk the Factor ment – a iscombination of drugs,said. behavioral exercises, guide to good cancer, needed, researchers System an in online 2014 to address the gay need for sex following prostate cancer treatment, individual coaching and social support; routine, standardized data collection while half will be asked to continue whatevertothey have been doing up totransgender now. evaluate health in the “This study is designed to test what works inpopulation, improvingHealio treatment for gay and reports. bisexual men. We have an amazing opportunity toBetween advance treatment, just for 2014-2017,notthe pooled gay men, but potentially for all men with prostate cancer,” says Rosser. data set classified 3,075 individuals, an estimated 0.55 percent of the sample, The study is enrolling guys right now. Rosser adds, “The best way to would get intoextrapolate as transgender, which contact with my team is through phone or email. to 1.27 million transgender people in the general population of the United States, Healio reports. SAN FRANCISCO — Trans health Compared to cisgender adults, care issues are front and center in the those who identified as transgender debate about whether the University of were more likely to have experienced California’s flagship San Francisco hospital diminished health-related quality of life should increase its treatment space as higher odds of fair or poor health or by joining a Catholic-run system that in the last restricts care based on religious teaching, The Restore Study is a National Institutes of severe Health-mental fundeddistress study through the30 days. Transgender adults also had more the Sacramento Bee reports. University of Minnesota. Reach out through email (restorestudy@umn.edu) days of activity limitation and poor physical and At issue is a proposal that UCSF(612-568-8860) or phone number mental health. Transgender adults were Medical Center affiliate with Dignity Health, less likely to have health insurance and a massive Catholic health care system reported more current cigarette use and that, like other Catholic chains, is bound physical inactivity than cisgender adults, by ethical and religious directives from Healio reports. the United States Conference of Catholic

Catholic hospital takeovers curtail trans treatments

You can contact us by calling 612-568-8860 or send an email to restorestudy@umn.edu.

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M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9 • WA SHINGTONBLA DE.COM • 19


Stop Cannabis Arrest & Prosecution in Washington DC

We the people of Washington DC ask that Mayor Bowser and the city council direct the Metropolitan Police Department to stop arresting and prosecuting citizens for Possession or Distribution of any amount of Cannabis , Cannabis oils and Cannabis Edibles . Arresting citizens for Cannabis Crimes is Immoral and against the community standard of the citizens of Washington DC Arresting citizens is a waste of the cit city’s resources and affects People of Color disproportionately. The People of Washington DC have spoken that they want the right to purchase recreational cannabis and smoke cannabis in private clubs overwhelmingly in 2015 . Stop All Arrest & Prosecutions of Cannabis We started this petition because... King Weedy Collective is a 501c3 non profit . Our mission is to bring safe access of Cannabis to all citizens and visitors of Washington DC

Please visit www.kingweedy.org to sign this petition 2 0 • WAS H IN GTO N B LAD E.CO M • M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9


KATHI WOLFE

is a regular contributor to the Blade and winner of the 2014 Stonewall Chapbook competition.

KEVIN NAFF

is editor of the Washington Blade. Reach him at knaff@washblade.com.

RICHARD J. ROSENDALL

is a writer and activist. Reach him at rrosendall@starpower.net.

VI E WPO I NT • MAY 03, 2019 • WA SHINGTONB L A DE . COM • 21

PETER ROSENSTEIN

is a D.C.-based LGBT rights and Democratic Party activist. He writes regularly for the Blade.

MARION MCFADDEN

is a public interest lawyer who lives with her wife of 20 years and their kids in Takoma Park. May 9 is World Ovarian Cancer Day.


KEVIN NAFF

RICHARD J. ROSENDALL

is a writer and activist. Reach him at rrosendall@starpower.net.

‘Why do we need the LGBT media?’

An offensive question rooted in homophobia As we prepare to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion, panel discussions are breaking out all over the country about the LGBT movement, its history and future. One of the topics getting some attention is the role of the LGBT media in the movement. The Los Angeles LGBT Center is hosting a panel discussion on May 8 titled “Breaking News, Breaking Barriers,” a conversation with LGBT journalists about the coverage and representation of LGBT people in the media from the late 1960s through today. The Los Angeles Blade’s tireless news editor/reporter Karen Ocamb will serve on the panel, along with LZ Granderson and Bettina Boxall of the LA Times and Luis Sandoval of Despierta America. No doubt, they will be asked to address the question of why we need the LGBT media in 2019. It’s a question I encountered countless times during the 2016 presidential campaign, when Hillary Clinton was assured victory and would cement all the progress toward equality of the Obama years. Clinton may have neglected the Rust Belt during her campaign, but she remembered her LGBT base and granted the Blade an interview late in the campaign. We get the rather insulting question about why we need our own niche press a lot in social media comments, usually after identifying a source as LGBT. “Who cares if Pete Buttigieg is gay?!? Why does it matter?!?” Cable news pundits have wondered the same. The reason it matters is that it’s never happened before at this level. And imagine the inspiration Buttigieg is providing to the confused, closeted kid in Indiana right now. Insulting the LGBT media and questioning the need for our existence is a particular form of disrespect and homophobia. That disrespect has come from all sides. Prominent Washington Post opinion writers for years relied on the Blade’s coverage to inform their commentary without citing us, a professional faux pas bordering on unethical. The Democratic National Committee’s former director of communications, Karen Finney, once wrote in an email that she used the Blade to line her birdcage during a tumultuous period when the DNC was being sued by its former LGBT liaison and we were running critical stories. The birdcage line is a lame insult, but if she’d directed it at the African-American press or

Jewish press, she would have been fired. The need for our work is clearer now that we’re back to a hostile administration in the White House. Mainstream reporters rarely ask questions in the White House and State Department briefing rooms about LGBT topics. As Barney Frank used to say, “If you’re not at the table, you’re probably on the menu.” Underrepresented communities need to tell their stories through their own lens. Take a look at the New York Times or Washington Post straight-washed obituaries of prominent LGBT people over the last 30 years and compare them to obits in the LGBT press and you’ll see that importance. More recently, the Blade has focused on Latin America and immigration, embedding with LGBT migrants at the border since their plight is unique and largely ignored by mainstream outlets. LGBT media outlets also speak the language of our community — and in a way that’s not patronizing. Take the recent trolling in the New York Post of a supposedly closeted bisexual presidential candidate jealous of Buttigieg’s surging poll numbers. We know they’re talking about Sen. Cory Booker, even as the Post hides behind dated, cheeky innuendo in raising the longstanding but unconfirmed rumors. LGBT media are also unafraid of writing about the sexual orientation of public officials when they are attacking their own or working for an administration undermining our equality. Most heterosexual, mainstream reporters and readers would be shocked to learn that President Trump has possibly appointed a gay Cabinet secretary in the EPA’s Andrew Wheeler. That as-yet-unconfirmed rumor has swirled since his days as counsel for the notorious homophobe Sen. Jim Inhofe. We’ve never had an openly gay Cabinet secretary, so Wheeler has a chance to make history if it’s true. And he’s not the only senior Trump official who may be hiding a gay secret (stay tuned). LGBT outlets were ahead of mainstream outlets on everyone from Sen. Larry Craig to Fox News’s Shepard Smith. As the Washington Blade prepares to celebrate its own 50th this year, all of us are working hard to fulfill that longstanding mission of telling LGBT stories and writing the first draft of our own history.

Those awful, scary people over there

Democrats bringing Robert’s Rules to a gunfight The bees at Lafayette Square are familiar to me. They have buzzed around me before, curious but not hostile. When they approached again the other day, I greeted them like the bird woman in the original “Mary Poppins,” saying how glad I was they had not been wiped out by pesticides. I mention the bees as an example of our need to coexist with others. This appears to be a foreign concept to Trump supporters. Take Franklin Graham. Please. Graham tweeted on April 24, “Mayor Buttigieg says he’s a gay Christian. As a Christian I believe the Bible which defines homosexuality as sin, something to be repentant of, not something to be flaunted, praised or politicized. The Bible says marriage is between a man & a woman— not two men, not two women.” Graham conveniently passes over lots of biblical barbarity. Besides which, America is not governed by the Bible. Meanwhile, Graham eagerly backs President Seven Deadly Sins. Like Mayor Pete, many LGBT people are Christians who use the Bible not as a bludgeon but a source of reflection. Scolds like Graham resemble a man who cuts “The Last Supper” into tiny squares, rearranges them into something monstrous, and attributes the result to da Vinci. When those who loudly cry “religious freedom” are silent about that of nonChristians, they show they are not about freedom, but supremacy. This is not an abstraction for me. I loved and was loved by a Muslim. Our last night shines in my memory. He arose just before dawn, unrolled his prayer mat, put on his kufi hat, knelt, and prayed. Then he put the things away and returned to bed. Give me my sin again, as Romeo said. If you would not be judged by the worst of your kind, do not judge another by the worst of his. We build a society with many small acts of recognition and respect. It is not monochromatic. Blind hacks and fanatics use fear and ignorance to pull us apart. Presumptuous people who claim God speaks to them tend not to mean it in Walt Whitman’s mystical sense of “letters from God dropt in the street,” but literally. Oddly, the voices in their heads never seem to tell

them anything they don’t want to hear. If one of these frauds got Jesus on the line, imagine Him saying, “Child, would you mind reading the Gospel?” They deserve a rebuke for the contrast between their noxious emissions and the teachings of the Nazarene carpenter’s son. Massachusetts Judge Shelley M. Richmond Joseph was indicted April 25 for helping an undocumented immigrant evade an Immigration and Customs Enforcement officer. Elie Mystal writes, “The irony is rich. The same forces that refuse to hold the president of the United States accountable for his multiple documented acts of obstruction of justice are trying to punish this judge for her compassion.” Henry David Thoreau wrote in “Civil Disobedience,” “Under a government which imprisons any unjustly, the true place for a just man is also a prison.” Men like Sen. Lindsey Graham and Rep. Jim Jordan want to turn the tables and investigate the investigators. Democrats fearful of fighting need reminding that the vandals will attack anyway. We can mock Trump’s constitutional illiteracy in vowing to appeal an impeachment to the Supreme Court; but with his dictatorial instincts, stonewalling, incitements, witness intimidation, and Mitch McConnell helping him pack federal courts, our laughter may prove hollow. While I was toasting friends at their wedding on April 27, white nationalists disrupted a book chat at Politics and Prose bookstore a few miles north—right down the block from Comet Ping Pong where Hillary was accused of running a child sex ring. The targeted author, Jonathan M. Metzl of “Dying of Whiteness: How the Politics of Racial Resentment is Killing America’s Heartland,” took it in stride. “In case anybody’s wondering what’s happening right now, they’re illustrating my point.” We have nowhere to hide. Democrats who stay in a defensive crouch are bringing Robert’s Rules to a gunfight. Guess who wins? Thoreau said, “Cast your whole vote, not a strip of paper merely, but your whole influence.” The Stonewall anniversary is approaching. Time to rekindle our rebel spirit. Copyright © 2019 by Richard J. Rosendall. All rights reserved.

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MARION MCFADDEN

PETER ROSENSTEIN

is a public interest lawyer who lives with her wife of 20 years and their kids in Takoma Park. May 9 is World Ovarian Cancer Day.

is a D.C.-based LGBT rights and Democratic Party activist. He writes regularly for the Blade.

Will Biden’s third try be the charm? Frontrunner must overcome controversial votes, avoid gaffes After much prevarication Joe Biden finally threw his hat into the ring becoming the 20th Democrat to enter the primary. He is leading in the polls. The question everyone is asking is whether this will be a replay of 1988 and 2008, his last two tries for the nomination or will the third time be the charm? I admire and respect Biden but think he is too old with too much baggage to run. But now he has actually entered the primary he deserves the same opportunity as other candidates to make his case and along with everyone else I will be listening. My unsolicited advice would be to beef up his staff with a diverse group of advisers. Had he done this I am sure his announcement video, though well meant, wouldn’t have included the line from the Declaration of Independence “All men are created equal.” It may have come from a good place but it still came off as tonedeaf considering the #MeToo movement, Biden’s own issues with women, and the newly ignited push to include the Equal Rights Amendment in the Constitution. Following release of the announcement video, Biden went to a Wilmington, Del., restaurant for a pizza and as reported in the Washington Post “was asked by a reporter if he had a message for the world.” Biden responded, “America’s coming back, like we used to be – ethical, straight - telling the truth…supporting all those good things.” I get how he meant to use the word ‘straight’ but it’s just not the word to use when talking about how America used to be when we have made great progress but are still fighting for LGBTQ+ equality. These are all small issues, but remember what helped end Biden’s campaign in 2008 was when he said about Barack Obama, then the only AfricanAmerican serving in the Senate, “I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nicelooking guy I mean, that’s a storybook, man.” Add to this his clearly unproductive phone call with Anita Hill. Her reaction wouldn’t be surprising if he repeated what he said publicly on “The View” and previously when he said “I wish I could have done more.” He was chair of the Judiciary Committee and could have done more. Then we find out he called Heather

Heyer’s mother. Heather is the young woman who was killed in Charlottesville, only after the video was released in which he talked about her. That is clearly another staff, or lack of staff, unforced error. Joe Biden has a 50-year record to run on and much of it he can be proud of. He has come a long way since being virulently antibussing to desegregate schools, and from authoring the 1994 Violent Crime Control and Law Enforcement Act. He will be attacked for his vote to support the Iraq war and is already being attacked by Sen. Elizabeth Warren for his support of the 2005 Bankruptcy Abuse Prevention and Consumer Protection Act. But Biden has much he should be proud of including his introduction of and fight for the Violence against Women Act. He is a supporter of gun control legislation, the Paris Climate Accords, and he supports raising the federal minimum wage. He has long stood up for the rights of the LGBTQ+ community and is credited for pushing Obama to support marriage equality. There are some impressive candidates in the Democratic primary. Women, people of color, even a gay candidate. They represent millennials, Generation X, Baby Boomers and the end of the silent generation, Biden and Sanders. They all agree we must ensure good affordable healthcare for every American; fight climate change; provide an affordable if not free education from pre-school to college; ensure an equal chance for every person to get a good job supporting themselves and their family by hard work that is decently paid; and a have a justice system that treats everyone fairly. But they have differing ideas on how to govern and how we go about reaching all those goals. During the next year primary voters will hear from each candidate on all those issues. My hope is each candidate will pledge when the nomination is decided, when one of them gets the required number of delegates to win, they will support and campaign for that person with all their heart. They will encourage their supporters to do the same by telling them every day how crucial it is to elect the Democrat. One thing they must agree on is any one of them is better than the disgusting lying thug currently occupying the White House.

Hey, you with the ovaries

I want the chance to save your life Trans men who have preserved your reproductive system and cis female queers, I’m talking to you. I want the chance to save your life. I first heard the word ovarian when I was 10 and developed a cyst the size of a grapefruit. I had been feeling bad off and on for months, suffering from abdominal pain that my pediatrician said was simply made up so I could get out of going to school. The doctor’s dismissiveness seemed off to my mom, since I liked school, but she didn’t push for a second opinion. It came to a head when I was at a sleepover at my best friend’s house and I said no when she asked me to go swimming. It was so out of character for me to lie around passively that my parents were called. A few hours later I was in the emergency room, sliding slowly and painfully flat on my back through a CT machine. Both the cyst and the ovary were removed the next day, and after recovery I didn’t give it too much thought. At some point last year, at 45 years old, I felt sick in several different ways, but didn’t understand how serious the combination of subtle symptoms could be. I had unusually bad cramps, which I haphazardly decided that meant I was going into early menopause. I felt bloated and attributed it to drinking too many fizzy drinks, even though it never went away. I had an upset stomach that didn’t respond to over the counter medications so I thought maybe I had IBS or had become gluten intolerant. Even though I was eating less, I got bigger around the middle, but by then it was the holidays so I shrugged it off. I had to urinate frequently at night, but I thought maybe it meant my diabetes medication needed to be increased, so I made a mental note to mention it at my next trip to the endocrinologist. I had lower back pain, which I figured was just a normal middle age thing. I blamed my incessant work travel for my swollen ankles and fatigue. On their own, each of these symptoms

was subtle, explainable. I had gotten an annual checkup with Pap smear less than a year before, so a gynecological problem never crossed my mind. Then the bloating demanded my full attention. I felt full most of the time, and there was a hard spot in my belly like constipation that wouldn’t go away, even though I was occasionally having diarrhea. When I looked down at my belly and it reminded me of being pregnant, there was no explaining that away. Soon I was flat on my back, getting ultrasounds and sliding through a CT machine, as scared as when I was a child. Tests identified an ovarian tumor roughly the size of a football, which was determined during surgery to malignant. Because the individual symptoms of ovarian cancer are subtle and there is no early detection screening, most people are not diagnosed until the cancer has metastasized to stage 3 or 4. This means that more than 50 percent of us do not make it five years from diagnosis. However, more than 90 percent of people who are diagnosed in the early stages live more than five years, so listening to our bodies is critical. I am amazed that despite ignoring the warning signs, I still ended up in the category of people diagnosed early, with stage 1 cancer – because the tumor was unusually non-aggressive and had not spread. My mother used to say, it’s a sign of intelligence to learn from other people’s mistakes. Please be smarter than I was. Pay attention if you experience persistent bloating, pelvic or abdominal pain, trouble eating, feeling full quickly, upset stomach, fatigue, changes in your bathroom habits, back pain, or painful intercourse. My oncologist said to seek medical attention if you have these kinds of symptoms for two weeks out of four. Go to your regular gynecologist, Whitman-Walker, Planned Parenthood, or the exceptionally good certified nurse-midwife at Takoma Park Gynecology. Queer-friendly medical professionals are all over the D.C. metro. I’m rooting for you.

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DARREN VANCE (right) with husband JOHN PAUL (left) and child ALEXANDER PAUL. Photo courtesy Vance

New era for Rainbow Families Local LGBT family resource agency expands mission as legislative obstacles loom

By LOU CHIBBARO JR. LCHIBBARO@WASHBLADE.COM

Rainbow Families, a D.C.-based nonprofit organization that got its start about 20 years ago as a local support group for LGBT parents, has expanded its programs and services to LGBT families throughout the mid-Atlantic region, according to recently named Executive Director Darren Vance. Vance told the Washington Blade in an interview last week that Rainbow Families’ main mission continues to be that of a provider of support for LGBT parents and prospective parents, both couples and individuals. Among the areas in which the group provides support is the access of LGBT parents to legal adoption rights as well as access to inclusive and welcoming schools, child care, health care and social services. He began his job as executive director last summer, becoming Rainbow Families’ first executive director and the mostly volunteer-driven group’s first full-time paid staff staffer. With LGBT rights organizations raising concern in recent years over hostile policies surfacing in the Trump administration in Washington and in many state legislatures, Vance said Rainbow Families is increasing its “advocacy endeavors,” including arranging for experts on public policy issues to speak at the group’s annual conference. Among the featured speakers at this year’s one-day conference, scheduled for Saturday, May 4, at D.C.’s Georgetown Day High School, are LGBT rights attorney Shannon Minter, who serves as legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights; and transgender activist Trystan Angel Reese. Reese, a gay transgender man, and his partner, gay activist Biff Chaplow, became the subject of international news coverage in 2017 when they publicly disclosed that they decided to have their own biological child, “one that Trystan carried and birthed himself,” the couple state on their website, biffandi.com. “As a transgender man, he has all the parts necessary to do so in a safe manner,” the website says of Reese’s pregnancy and childbirth. “He stopped taking his hormones, and they successfully conceived and had a beautiful, happy baby,” says the site, which adds, “Throughout that process, they shared their story with a wide variety of media outlets in the hopes that their story — of love and hope and family — might increase the visibility and acceptance of trans people and LGBT families.” Although Rainbow Families’ promotional literature for its May 4 conference doesn’t say so directly, the appearance of Trystan Angel Reese as the “featured speaker” and Shannon Minter’s role as the presenter of a conference “Town Hall Meeting on legal concerns facing our families with the current political climate,” appears to send a message that the conference will touch on hot-button political issues impacting LGBT families.

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“We really for years have worked both to support families and educate prospective families,” Vance says. “I am indeed expanding our focus a bit. However, everything we do is about families or family members,” he says, including what he calls an interesting development where straight parents of LGBT children, including trans and non-binary children, are becoming involved with Rainbow Families. Nevertheless, “in light of what is going on in our climate, I felt as executive director it is important to increase our advocacy endeavors,” Vance says. “Part of that certainly is with the conference and having Shannon as our keynote speaker to really make sure that we’re informed and we know what we need to do to stay engaged.” Vance says Rainbow Families believes at least three important public policy issues under consideration on the state and federal level have the potential for impacting LGBT families. One of them, he hopes, will be beneficial, the other two are harmful. The first was the decision by the U.S. Supreme Court earlier this year to take on a case that will decide in an official ruling next year on whether Title VII of the U.S. Civil Rights Act of 1964 bans discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity and thus protects LGBT people from discrimination in all 50 states. “That certainly can affect the family,” says Vance in referring to LGBT parents who would be protected against employment discrimination if the high court rules in a favorable way. “It could impact their income,” he says. The second issue of concern to Rainbow Families, Vance says, are proposed bills surfacing in state legislatures attempting to place restrictions on the legal rights of same-sex married couples. At least once such bill in Texas, he says, would in effect tell LGBT couples that although the Supreme Court gave same-sex couples marriage equality, “we’re not entitled to the legal benefits of marriage.” The third issue of great concern to LGBT families, according to Vance, is attempts in some states to deny parenting rights for LGBT people by allowing adoption organizations to refuse to approve an adoption to an LGBT person or couple on religious grounds. “And what is especially unfathomable is there are children all over the country in foster care,” Vance says. “And in the LGBTQ community, we adopt huge numbers of children out of foster care. And there are people that don’t want us to become parents. And so with this climate, that is gaining traction.” Vance says most of the anti-LGBT family developments are occurring in areas outside the immediate D.C. metropolitan area. “And we are lucky, those of us that live in this D.C. region,” he says. “We’re golden right now. We have a lot of acceptance. We’re in

a little bit of a bubble. The concern for our families as a nationwide community is that there are all these efforts in other areas of the country that are really trying to prohibit us from creating our families. It’s in the very fabric of this political climate to take rights away from LGBT individuals and LGBT families.” More information about Rainbow Families and its May 4 conference, whose theme is “Now More Than Ever,” can be found at rainbowfamilies.org. Following is a partial transcript of Darren Vance’s interview with the Washington Blade about Rainbow Families and its upcoming conference in D.C. WASHINGTON BLADE: The Rainbow Families website shows your organization has for a long time worked on assisting individuals and LGBT couples adopt children and secure legal help to establish families. But your annual conference this year includes a town hall meeting on “legislative threats” to LGBT families. Is Rainbow Families now taking on more political advocacy work? DARREN VANCE: Sure, let me address that. Indeed for well over 20 years and parts of us go back 25 and 27 years indeed providing get-togethers and events and support for LGBTQ families. But a large chunk of what we have done for that long as well is providing education and support for prospective parents and people on a family planning path to help them navigate the unique ins and outs of their family planning journey as LGBT individuals or couples. So it’s kind of two fold or both. We really for years have worked both to support families and educate prospective families. I am indeed expanding our focus a bit. However, everything we do is about families or family members. So for example we have a growing number of heteronormative parents who and their queer kids that are becoming members. And we have kind of a growing number of trans and non-binary members, which is phenomenal. BLADE: When you say heteronormative families do you mean families with straight parents? VANCE: Yup, yup. BLADE: But they have gay or LGBT kids? VANCE: Yup — or questioning or nonbinary or what have you. Again, if you’re in my generation — I’m in my mid-50s — it was kind of like it was this box or that box. And now there are no boxes at all. It’s kind of a big happy bucket of however one feels and identifies and like that.But anyway, to your question about getting into more of a political bent, that is not the kind of focus that we do. However, in light of what is going on in our climate, I felt as executive director it is important to increase our advocacy endeavors. Part of that certainly is with the conference and having Shannon (Minter, legal director of National Center

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for Lesbian Rights) as our keynote speaker to really make sure that we’re informed and we know what we need to do to stay engaged. And in fact, the theme of the conference is ‘Now More than Ever.’ BLADE: Have the conferences been an important part of Rainbow Families work over the years? VANCE: Yes, indeed. And we decided — this will be our ninth conference. So that’s how we’ve done it for the last eight conferences. Another thing that is kind of interesting is that we’ve received so much feedback from the community. We’ve always held it every other year. And we’ve gotten feedback that people wanted it held annually. So it is now an annual affair. We are going to focus our efforts on more advocacy and awareness, both on our own and in partnership with other organizations in our community. BLADE: I noticed you removed D.C. from your name. VANCE: Right, we have members from all over the region from as far down as Norfolk, Virginia to as far up as kind of south of Philly. So we felt that being called Rainbow Families of D.C. might lend the wrong impression. So it was about two years ago that we really kind of rebranded; not really rebranded, we just dropped the two initials at the end. But we are still based in Washington, D.C. But as far as advocacy, those things might entail educational workshops where we have a guest speaker. You know someone like Shannon or someone like that coming in for a day and doing workshops. It could include doing events on the Hill, participating in other events on the Hill to encourage our legislators to hear the things that are important to us. BLADE: Might that include testimony before congressional hearings? VANCE: Certainly. In fact, we’ve been invited to do some of that. So indeed that’s certainly part of it, yup. You know making sure that our membership is informed on issues that matter to us and then providing them with resources on where to go and what to do. BLADE: You mentioned the climate in the last few years. Is there anything that’s happened in the last year or two that could adversely impact LGBT families or Rainbow Families’ members? VANCE: Certainly. The biggest thing is the interpretation of Title VII, which will go to the Supreme Court this fall. And we expect a decision probably in January. And that is for the Supreme Court to decide if Title VII protects … transgender as well as sexual orientation. So that’s the biggest thing that’s on our radar. BLADE: Would that impact families as well as others, since Title VII is usually related to employment discrimination? The court cases have been about gay people and transgender people being fired from their jobs.

VANCE: Exactly. That certainly can affect the family. It could impact their income. The other thing that is really poignant and affecting families are numerous, numerous state level cases where for example, there is one in Texas, I believe, that they’re saying alright, the Supreme Court gave you marriage equality. They’re going to argue that we’re not entitled to the benefits of marriage. So what they’re argument is, sure we’ll give you a marriage certificate but we don’t have to provide anything else for you legally. BLADE: Is that surfacing in the form of legislation in the states? VANCE: Yes, legislation at the state level, so it is very likely that those types of cases will escalate. BLADE: To deny marriage-related rights? VANCE: Exactly. And then the third thing that I would say is there are numerous state and local attempts to strip parenting rights on the basis of religious freedom. And that is not-so-thinly veiled … legislation to prohibit our community from becoming parents. And what is especially unfathomable is that there are children all over the country in foster care. And in the LGBTQ community, we adopt huge numbers of children out of foster care. And there are people that don’t want us to become parents. And so with this climate, that is gaining traction. BLADE: The D.C. Superior Court each year holds an adoption day ceremony in which same-sex couples are among the many couples in the city that have their adoptions officially approved during that ceremony. Is this something that Rainbow Families is aware of? VANCE: Yes, and I’ve been to it twice just as an observer. And we are lucky, those of us that live in this D.C. region. We’re golden right now. We have a lot of acceptance. We’re in a little bit of a bubble. The concern for our families is as a nationwide community is that there are all these efforts in other areas of the country that are really trying to prohibit us from creating our families. Even an effort to modify parts of the Affordable Care Act will have implications for our community. And Shannon just told me about that yesterday and I don’t know the details. But it’s in the very fabric of this political climate to take rights away from LGBT individuals and LGBT families.

Rainbow Families 2019 Family Conference ‘Now More Than Ever’ Saturday, May 4 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Georgetown Day High School 4200 Davenport St., N.W. Admission fees vary for members, non-members Non-member registration: $90 rainbowfamilies.org


QUEERY Nichelle Johnson/DJ Honey Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

QUEERY: Nichelle Johnson/DJ Honey

The Youth Pride DJ answers 20 queer questions By JOEY DIGUGLIELMO JOEYD@WASHBLADE.COM

Don’t ask DJ Honey (aka Nichelle Johnson) what style of music she spins. She doesn’t believe in such discussions. “You cannot characterize people or music,” the 30-year-old Philadelphia native says. “The one thing that is commonly sound is how music makes people feel. I play to the people who want to feel good when the music starts to blare through the speakers.” DJ Honey is DJing this weekend at Youth Pride. It’s Saturday, May 4 in Dupont Circle from noon-5 p.m. Rayceen Pendarvis and Private Tails will host. The after party Infatuation Dance is at the Kimpton Hotel (2121 P St., N.W.). Youth Pride is for LGBTQ youth and allies ages 24 and younger. Details at youthpridealliance.org. Honey started spinning at Rayceen’s events about five years ago. This is her first time spinning at Youth Pride.

“It’s important that our youth have a place to be themselves,” Honey says. “That was rare in my youth. A place where there isn’t a closet but to only be your natural LGBTQ self.” Honey got into DJing at age 17 through her mentor Debonair Samir. She spins hiphop, Latin, Afro beats, reggae and more at mostly queer events but some straight as well. See her upcoming appearances at honeythedj.com. She works by day as an IT analyst for Comcast. Honey came to Washington six years ago. “I was too ambitious for Philadelphia,” she says. Honey and partner Erika Singley live in District Heights, Md. Honey enjoys traveling, collecting rare vinyl, hiking, dancing, spades, chess, writing music, poetry, photography and more in her free time.

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell? I’ve been out for as long as I’ve known. I grew up in a sexually comfortable home, so I was never ashamed for being lesbian. So I’d say 15.

What’s your greatest domestic skill? Cleaning

Who’s your LGBTQ hero? Lena Waithe! Every lesbian should be like her.

What’s your social media pet peeve? Most importantly, internet bullies. Social media became a platform where bullies can bully without suffering consequences.

What LGBTQ stereotype most annoys you? Assuming that bisexuals are greedy. Thinking that they want men and women at the same time. It just grinds my gears. What’s your proudest professional achievement? I was the 2018 Augusta Pride Festival DJ! To have the opportunity to DJ for over 15,000 LGBTIA+ lovers was a proud moment! What terrifies you? Honestly, I don’t have fears. I don’t believe in investing into negative entities that you have no control over. I deal with life and problems as they come. What’s something trashy or vapid you love? A good ratchet time! Sometimes going in possibly the most unsafe places to have a great time. That’s where the best memories are.

What’s your favorite LGBTQ movie or show? “RENT”

What would the end of the LGBTQ movement look like to you? For everyone to mind their business and worry about themselves. Stop worry about what others are doing with their lives. We are human and we have rights just like the rest of the human race. What’s the most overrated social custom? A couple who is in a long-term relationship should be gearing up for marriage and/or children. In my opinion, it’s rude to ask such questions. What was your religion, if any, as a child and what is it today? My home was very open religiously so there weren’t any boundaries on beliefs. I still live by that to this day. What’s D.C.’s best hidden gem? D.C. is its own best hidden gem. D.C. is compounded by hidden gems. It’s never ending with stumbling into a unique random place or garden or art show or activity. D.C. is constantly

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In love and war, what will you stand for?

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Tosca May 11–25 Opera House Music by Giacomo Puccini / Libretto by Luigi Illica and Giuseppe Giacosa Sung in Italian with Projected English Titles. Casting available at Kennedy-Center.org/wno

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changing growing with the times. It’s never left behind but in the forefront of evolution. What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime? Life changed when “The Box” video channel became “MTV2.” Music videos were never the same for me again. What celebrity death hit you hardest? That’s a hard one. Between Left Eye & Aaliyah, I can’t choose. If you could redo one moment from your past, what would it be? The moment I learned how to DJ. I would’ve professionally started when I was 17.

A DAZZLING RUDOLF NUREYEV ARRIVES IN PARIS AND MAKES A CHOICE THAT CHANGES HIS LIFE FOREVER. “LOVELY, ELEGANT, IMPRESSIVE. A CLASSY – AND RESPECTFULLY SEXY – NIGHT AT THE MOVIES.” -Peter Debruge, VARIETY

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I got my life together and stopped chasing women! Ha!

What do you wish you’d known at 18? That I am an adult and am responsible for myself. #Adulting Why Washington? Just something about this vibe of the city that I felt would make me into the best woman I could be. And I was right!

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Special Offer: Tickets starting at $39!* Join Washington National Opera as we partner with Capital Pride for a night at Puccini’s Tosca and an exclusive Night Out reception! ADVERTISING

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* Offer valid on select orchestra seats for the 5/22 performance of Washington National Opera: Tosca. Offer subject to availability. Not valid in combination with any other offer. Not valid on previously purchased tickets. Offer may be withdrawn at any time. Service fees may apply. Major support for WNO and Tosca is provided by Jacqueline Badger Mars. David M. Rubenstein is the Presenting Underwriter of WNO. WNO acknowledges the longstanding generosity of Life Chairman Mrs. Eugene B. Casey.

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WNO's Presenting Sponsor Generous support for WNO Italian Opera is provided by Daniel and Gayle D’Aniello. Unexpected Italy is presented in cooperation with the Embassy of Italy. International programming at the Kennedy Center is made possible through the generosity of the Kennedy Center International Committee on the Arts.

In partnership with


Counterclockwise from top: BEN PLATT plays the Anthem next weekend Photo by Julian Broad; courtesy Karpel Group; MATTHEW MORRISON performs at the Strathmore Gala Saturday night ANDY COHEN (left) and ANDERSON COOPER bring their antics to Baltimore May 11 Photo by Glenn Kulbak

LGBT Fallen Heroes honored May 13 LGBT Fallen Heroes Fund hosts CopCakes for a Cause 9, a wine- and dessert-tasting silent auction, at Uproar Lounge and Restaurant (639 Florida Ave., N.W.) on Sunday, May 12 from 5-8 p.m. There will be wine, soda, cupcakes and desserts from D.C. bakeries. Full cash bar will be open. Tickets are $25. Proceeds from ticket sales will benefit the LGBT Fallen Heroes Fund. LGBT Fallen Heroes Fund holds the LGBT Fallen Heroes Memorial Service in the theater at the Women in Military Service for America Memorial at Arlington National Cemetery (2 Memorial Ave., Arlington, Va.) on Monday, May 13 from 2-5 p.m. Stories of fallen LGBT heroes will be

read aloud by volunteers. Then the heroes’ significant others will receive the flags that were flown over the Capitol in their honor and a commemorative portrait to serve as reminder of their loved one’s service. The memorial service takes place before the Candlelight Vigil for National Police Week. For details, visit facebook.com/ lgbtfallenheroesfund.

Distrkt C goes leather Distrkt C’s Leather Pride and Market will be held at Karma D.C. (2221 Adams Pl., N.E.) on Saturday, May 11 from 10 p.m.- 4 a.m. The event will be hosted by Emerson Aniceto (Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather 2019) and Gerard Turner (Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather 2018). DJ Oscar and DJ Edgar

Photo courtesy Strathmore; and

Velazquez will play music for the night. Guests can also buy leather items at the market. Admission is free before 11:15 p.m. and $30 after. For more information, visit distrktc.com.

as gay in the music video “Ease My Mind,” the first single off the album. Tickets range from $50-355. For more information, visit theanthemdc.com.

Tony-winner Platt to play Anthem

GMCW black tie gala is May 11

Tony Award-winning actor Ben Platt performs at the Anthem (901 Wharf St., S.W.) on Saturday, May 11 at 8 p.m. Platt earned a Tony for Best Actor in a Musical for his role as Evan Hansen in the hit Broadway musical “Dear Evan Hansen.” His other acting credits include the films “Pitch Perfect” and “Pitch Perfect 2” and the musical “The Book of Mormon.” Platt released his debut album “Sing to Me Instead” in March. He publicly came out

The Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington hosts its 2019 Spring Affair, its annual black-tie gala, at the Ritz-Carlton (1150 22nd St., N.W.) on Saturday, May 11 Actress Jackie Hoffman will be the special guest host. Hoffman’s most recent acting role as Mamacita in Ryan Murphy’s mini-series “Feud: Bette and Joan” earned her an Emmy nomination. She has also appeared in “Birdman,” “Kissing Jessica Stein,” among others. Cocktails and the

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TODAY U Street Music Hall (1115A U St., N.W.) hosts Flaunt It Dance Party, sponsored by This Free Life, tonight from 10:30 p.m.-3 a.m. Special guests Imp Queen, Yuhua Hamasaki and FKA Twink will make appearances. Dee Dee Derèon, Venus Fastrada, Ariel Von Quinn, Washington Heights, Vagenesis and Desiree Dik will perform. DJ Honey will spin tracks. Doors open at 10:30 p.m. Show starts at 11:30 p.m. Free entry with RSVP. For details, visit tfl.events/dc. Catharsis on the Mall, a three-day festival focused on art, dance and healing, kicks off on the National Mall (900 Ohio Dr., S.W.) today at noon through Sunday at noon. There will be large-scale art, workshops, music, activities and speakers. Admission is free. For more information, visit catharsisonthemall.com. National Symphony Orchestra Pops welcome actress/singer Vanessa Williams for a performance at the Kennedy Center (2700 F St., N.W.) tonight at 8 p.m. The performance will include pop, R&B and musical theater. Tickets range from $39-99. For more details, visit kennedy-center.org.

Saturday, May 4 silent auction are at 6:30 p.m. Dinner and live entertainment is at 8 p.m. followed by the 2019 Harmony Awards Presentation and live auction. Tickets are $225. For more details, visit gmcw.org.

Cooper, Cohen back with ‘Shallow Tales’ AC2 An Intimate Evening with Anderson Cooper and Andy Cohen: Deeper Talk and More Shallow Tales comes to the Hippodrome Theatre (12 N Eutaw St., Baltimore) on Saturday, May 11 at 8 p.m. CNN anchor Cooper and Bravo’s Andy Cohen team up to give their take on pop culture and world news. The friends will interview each other and take questions from the audience. Tickets range from $93-137. For more information, visit ticketmaster.com.

“Glee” star Matthew Morrison and Broadway star Shoshana Bean headline Strathmore’s Annual Spring Gala at the Music Center at Strathmore (5301 Tuckerman Ln., North Bethesda, Md.) tonight at 9 p.m. The pair will sing a mix of Broadway hits and American songbook standards. Tickets range from $38-98. Patrons can also attend the Annual Spring Gala dinner with tickets starting at $500. For more details, visit strathmore.org. Rainbow Families hosts its 2019 conference at Georgetown Day High School (4200 Davenport St., N.W.) today from 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. This year’s theme is “Now More Than Ever.” There will be more than 30 workshops for LGBTQ families, prospective parents and allies including Talking with Children and Teens About Adoption, Setting Positive Limits with Preschoolers, Hair Ideas for Kids of Color and more. NBC 4’s Barbara Harrison will be the guest of honor. Trystan Angel Reese is the featured speaker. There will also be age-appropriate activities for children ages 2-and-a-half-16 years old including puzzles, stories, games, improv, outdoor

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time and more. Adult registration is $90. Breakfast and lunch are included. For more information, visit rainbowfamiliesdc.org. Youth Pride Alliance and Damien Ministries hosts Youth Pride Day today from noon-5 p.m. in Dupont Circle. Rayceen Pendarvis and Private Tails hosts the event. There will be giveaways, performances, speakers and testimonials. LGBTQ youth 24 years old and younger and allies are welcome. For more information, visit facebook.com/youthpridealliance. Youth Pride Alliance hosts Infatuation Dance at the Kimpton Hotel Palomar (2121 P St., N.W.) tonight from 6-10 p.m. There will be a DJ, food, drinks, face painting and mask making. The event is for LGBTQ youth 24 years old and under. For details, visit facebook.com/youthpridealliance. Comedian Wanda Sykes brings her “Oh Well Tour” to the Warner Theatre (513 13th St., N.W.) tonight at 7 p.m. Doors open at 6 p.m. Tickets range from $37.50-93. For more information, visit warnerthearedc.com. La Ti Do performs on the Millennium Stage at the Kennedy Center (2700 F St., N.W.) tonight from 6-7 p.m. Rachel Hogan, Tiffany Lynn Royster, Michael Santos Sandoval and Ava Silva will perform with accompaniment by Leigh Delano. Don Michael Mendoza hosts the show. Free admission. For details, visit kennedycenter.org.

Sunday, May 5 Gay Day at the Zoo is at the Smithsonian National Zoo (3001 Connecticut Ave., N.W.) is today from 9 a.m.-4 p.m. There will be programming for families and youth. LGBTQ people, families and allies are welcome. Attendees can purchase a Gay Day at the Zoo T-shirt online with prices ranging from $10-20. For more information and to purchase a T-shirt, visit thedccenter.org/gayday2019. Trade (1410 14th St., N.W.) hosts the Gay Day at the Zoo Afterparty this evening from 5-8 p.m. The bar will serve its signature cocktail in honor of the day, The Zeebra. A portion of the cocktail’s proceeds will be donated to the D.C. Center. High Heel Race winner Madame Chevitz will perform. Gallery Kitchen will provide free food. There will also be face painting and a chance to take a picture with Alex the Unicorn. For more details, visit facebook.com/tradebardc.

Monday, May 6 Twisted Dinner Show, a drag dinner show, is at Spaceylounge D.C. (2309 18th St., N.W.) tonight from 8-11 p.m. Desiree Dik hosts the show. Bombalicious Eklaver, Bratworst, Bellatrix Foxx and Emma Zon Prime will perform. Admission is $30 and includes your choice of vegetarian pizza quesadilla or cauliflower chicken wings. Ticket price includes unlimited hemp-o-mosas. Seating is at 7 p.m. Show starts at 8 p.m. For more information, visit facebook.com/spaceyloungedc.

Tuesday, May 7 Gay for Good D.C. hosts a fundraiser at Dacha Beer Garden (1600 7th St., N.W.) today from 4-8 p.m. A wristband is $10 and gives access to an extended happy hour until 8 p.m. All proceeds will support Gay for Good D.C. Extra donations welcome. Gay for Good’s mission is to bring together the LGBTQ community through social welfare and environmental service projects. For more information, visit facebook.com/gayforgooddc.

Wednesday, May 8 Dr. Lane holds a lecture on Black LGBTQ Pride and Black Queer Life in D.C. at Redrocks (1348 H St., N.E.) this evening at 6 p.m. Open discussion starts at 6 p.m. followed by the lecture at 7 p.m. Admission is $20 for the class. Visit facebook.com/ thedoctorlane for more details. D.C. Fray hosts men seeking men speed dating at Nellie’s Sports Bar (900 U St., N.W.) tonight from 7-10 p.m. The event is for men in their 20s and 30s. Tickets are $25. For more information, visit dcfray. com/events.

Thursday, May 9 The 2019 Center Global Annual Reception is at Room and Board (1840 14th St., N.W.) tonight from 6-9 p.m. There will be music, drinks, hors d’oeuvres and more. Rayceen Pendarvis emcees the event. Funds raised from ticket sales will go towards supporting Center Global’s work supporting LGBT asylum seekers, asylees and refugees. Tickets range from $25-1000. For details, visit thedccenter.org.


This Week in the Arts provided by CultureCapital.com Philharmonix. May 4. Washington Performing Arts. Sixth & I. washingtonperformingarts.org. Postcards. May 5. DC Concert Orchestra Society. Church of the Epiphany. dcconcertorchestra.org. Shenson Chamber Music Concert. May 8. National Museum of Women in the Arts. nmwa.org. Silkroad Ensemble: Heroes. May 5. Kennedy Center. kennedy-center.org. Tetzlaff-Tetzlaff-Vogt Trio. May 4. Library of Congress. loc.gov. The Lynnes Workshop & Concert. May 4. Arts on the Green. Arts Barn. gaithersburgmd.gov. Transfigured Nights. May 9. Washington Performing Arts. Kennedy Center. washingtonperformingarts.org. Turtle Island Quartet. May 4. Dumbarton Concerts. dumbartonconcerts.org.

Love’s Labor’s Lost Thru Jun 9. Folger Theatre. folger.edu.

A young king and his three friends renounce the company of women for three years, in favor of scholarly pursuits. Their pact is immediately jeopardized, however, when the Princess of France and her three companions arrive for an unexpected visit. Will the men stand resolute and keep their monastic vows—or surrender to the beauty and charms of the opposite sex. Shakespeare’s delicious comedy is full of foolish lovers and clowns, disguise, and the follies of love.

NY Gilbert and Sullivan Players I’ve Got a Little Twist May 4. The Alden. mcleancenter.org

A cabaret evening that demonstrates the timelessness of Gilbert and Sullivan, featuring ingeniously rewritten lyrics for G&S tunes, G&S numbers that are juxtaposed with more modern musical theatre, and, sometimes, classic Gilbert and Sullivan that is left intact and allowed to speak for itself.

Jackson Arts Center: Open Studios May 5, 12pm–4pm. jacksonartscenter.com

Jackson artists open their doors to the community for a free day of art, food and music inside the historic Jackson School where you can explore, meet and greet the artists, and take home original art.

Chiarina Chamber Players: Impressions May 5. Saint Mark’s Episcopal Church. Chiarina.org.

Nadia Boulanger’s colorful sound palette meets Caroline Shaw’s reverberating textures, while Spaniard Joaquin Turina’s infectious trio invokes song and dance. Schumann’s monumental Piano Quartet offers a triumphant finish. PHOTO COURTESY OF FOLGER THEATRE

THEATRE Annie. May 3-May 18. Reston Community Center. restonplayers.org. Curtains. May 3-May 11. Thomas Jefferson Theatre. thearlingtonplayers.org. FAME, el Musical (en español). May 9-Jun 9. GALA Hispanic Theatre. galatheatre.org. Into the Woods. Thru May 16. Ford’s Theatre. fords.org. God of Carnage. May 4-May 25. Keegan Theatre. keegantheatre.com. Grand Hotel, The Musical. Thru May 19. Spunk. Thru Jun 23. Signature Theatre. sigtheatre.org. I’ve Got a Little Twist. NY Gilbert and

Sullivan Players. May 4. The Alden. mcleancenter.org. A Comedy of Tenors. Thru May 12. Olney Theatre Center. olneytheatre.org. Laugh Index. Thru May 16. DC Arts Center (DCAC). dcartscenter.org. Love’s Labor’s Lost. Thru Jun 9. Folger Theatre. folger.edu. Mary Stuart. May 8-Jun 9. Olney Theatre Center. olneytheatre.org. Oslo. Thru May 19. Round House. roundhousetheatre.org. Pride & Joy. Thru May 12. National Theatre. thenationaldc.org. Shear Madness. Thru Jun 19. Shear Madness. Kennedy Center. shearmadness.com.

Still Standing. May 8. CenterStage at RCC. restoncommunitycenter.com.

DANCE La Fill Mal. May 3-May 5. BalletNova. BalletNova.org. Dana Tai Soon Burgess Dance Company. May 4. National Portrait Gallery, Smithsonian. Heart Stück Bernie & DancEthos. May 4-May 5. Dance Place. danceplace.org. The Moving Print. May 9. AU Museum at the Katzen. american.edu.

MUSIC Alexander Quartet/Joyce Yang. May 5. Bender JCC. benderjccgw.org. Silent Film: Sounds of Silence. May 3. Atlas. atlasarts.org. Cora Harvey Armstrong. May 9. Library of Congress. loc.gov. Danish Clarinet Trio. May 8. National Gallery of Art. nga.gov. Debut of the Bogany Piano. Embassy of Hungary. embassyseries.org. Deva Mahal. May 8. AMP. ampbystrathmore.com. Easter & Ascension Oratorios. May 5. Washington Bach Consort. National Presbyterian Church. bachconsort.org. Clarissa Bevilacqua. May 7. AMP. ampbystrathmore.com. Impressions. May 5. Chiarina Chamber Players. Saint Mark’s Episcopal Church. Chiarina.org. Jamie Barton. May 4. Kennedy Center. kennedy-center.org. The Contemporaries. National Chamber Esemble. May 4. Gunston. nationalchamberensemble.org. NSO: Berlioz’s Symphonie Fantastique. May 9-May 11. NSO. Kennedy Center. kennedy-center.org.

MUSEUMS AU Museum at the Katzen. Kenneth Victor Young & Paintings by Eduardo Carrillo. Thru May 26. Turbulence. May 4-May 26. Squire Broel. Thru Aug 11. Forward Press:. Thru Aug 11. american.edu. Anderson House.Revolutionary Reflections. Thru Oct 27. societyofthecincinnati.org. Dumbarton Oaks. Written in Knots. Thru Aug 18. Beyond Knotting. Thru Jun 1. doaks.org. Folger Shakespeare Library. The Architecture of the Folger Shakespeare Library. Thru Jan 5. folger.edu. Kreeger Museum. Charles Hinman. Thru Jul 31. kreegermuseum.org. Library of Congress. 50 Years of Stonewall: LGBTQ+ Activism in the US. Thru Jul 11. Baseball Americana. Thru Jul 27. loc.gov. National Gallery of Art. Tintoretto: Artist of Renaissance Venice. Thru Jul 9. American Pre-Raphaelites. Thru Jul 21. The Life of Animals in Japanese Art. May 5-Jul 28. Oliver Lee Jackson. Thru Sep 15. nga.gov. National Geographic. Queens of Egypt. Thru Sep 2. nationalgeographic.org. National Museum of Women in the Arts. Ursula von Rydingsvard. Thru Jul 28. More is More: Multiples. May 3-Sep 15. Thru Sep 20. nmwa.org. National Portrait Gallery, Smithsonian. Lincoln’s Contemporaries, Champions, One Year: 1968, An American Odyssey. Thru May 19. Votes for Women. Thru Jan 5. npg.si.edu.

GALLERIES Arlington Arts Center. Spring SOLOS 2019 Exhibition. Thru Jun 8. arlingtonartscenter.org. Arts Barn. Black and White. Thru May 12. gaithersburgmd.gov. Brentwood Arts Exchange. (IN)Justice Systems. Thru May 18. arts.pgparks.com. Del Ray Artisans. Sacred Feminine Art Exhibit. May 3-Jun 2. delrayartisans.org.

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Youth Pride Day is May 4 in Dupont Circle. Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

Pride season fast approaching

Youth Pride kicks things off this weekend, then it’s high gear By MARIAH COOPER MCOOPER@WASHBLADE.COM

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Pride season is only a few weeks away with plenty of events planned both in D.C. and surrounding areas. Youth Pride Day is Saturday, May 4 from noon-5 p.m. in Dupont Circle. Rayceen Pendarvis and Private Tails will host. There will be free stuff, performances, games, speakers and more. LGBTQ youth under 24 and allies are welcome to attend. Infatuation Dance, a Youth Pride Day afterparty, is at the Kimpton Hotel Palomar (2121 P St., N.W.) from 6-10 p.m. There will be face painting and mask making. For details, visit youthpridealliance.org. Silver Pride, an LGBTQ event for people over 60, is on May 10 at Human Rights Campaign (1640 Rhode Island Ave., N.W.). The day will offer workshops, resources and social activities aimed at LGBTQ people over 60. Rayceen Pendarvis hosts the event. For more information, visit silverpridedc.org. Asian Pacific Islander Pride holds its first ever Pride celebration on May 17. Visit capitalpride.org/api-pride-2019 for updates. Capital Trans Pride is on May 18-19. Attendees can expect a celebration of the transgender and non-binary community with workshops, a resource fair, happy hour, entertainment, an outdoor movie and more. For more information, visit capitalpride.org. D.C. Black Pride is May 24-27 with events at the Renaissance Hotel (999 9th St., N.W.) and various other locations in D.C. The Pride Exhibit Hall will be open at the Renaissance Hotel on May 2425. Women In The Life Pop-Up Archive Gallery and Open Mic Reunion, featuring a performance by Boomscat, is at the Renaissance Hotel on May 24 from 8 p.m.midnight. Early bird tickets are $25 and general admission tickets are $40. There will also be a happy hour meet and greet on May 24 from 3-9 p.m. at the Renaissance Hotel and a CommUNITY Opening Reception from 7-9 p.m. Complimentary speed dating follows from 9-11 p.m. Other weekend events include a poetry slam, workshops such as Substance Use in the LGBTQ Community and Ask the Doc Understanding Health and Wellness and a LGBTQ elders session. There will also be a Transgender Town Hall. Numerous official D.C. Black Pride parties will also take place throughout the weekend. For a complete list of events, visit dcblackpride.org. Capital Pride is May 31-June 9. This year’s theme is “Shhhout Past, Present and Proud.” The Capital Pride Block Party is on June 8 from 4-10 p.m. at 15th Street and P Street N.W. There will be entertainment, food and more. Capital Pride Parade is on June 8 from 4:30-8 p.m. in Dupont Circle and Logan Circle. More than 200 organizations will walk 1.5 miles on floats, vehicles or by foot holding sings, banners and offering entertainment. The Capital Pride Festival is June 9 from noon10 p.m. at Pennsylvania Avenue and 3rd Street N.W. About 300 exhibitors including local community groups and businesses, organizations and food vendors will be on display. There will be live entertainment, music and more. Admission is free but donations are encouraged. Capital Pride Concert is June 9 from 1-8 p.m on Pennsylvania Avenue and 3rd Street N.W. The concert is free but VIP passes with a private bar, complimentary beer, wine and spirits, complimentary light

fare and a view of backstage will be offered. Concert Pit Zone passes will also be offered for entry to the Pit Zone in front of the north side of the Capitol Concert Stage. Proceeds for both passes will benefit the Capital Pride Alliance and LGBTQ partner organizations. For more information, visit capitalpride.org. Pride on the Pier, the second annual celebration on the Southwest D.C. waterfront sponsored by the Blade, LURe and the Wharf, will be held Saturday, June 8, 2-9 p.m. culminating with a fireworks show sponsored by Compass at 9 p.m. DJs, dancing, a family zone and more. VIP tickets and more info at prideonthepierdc.com. D.C. Latinx Pride is June 1-2 and June 5-6 at multiple venues in D.C. The official dance party is on June 6 from 9 p.m.-3 a.m. at the D.C. Eagle (3701 Benning Rd., N.E.). Other events will include a parade and a LGBTQ history tour. For updates, visit latinoglbthistory.org/latinx-pride. Delaware Pride Festival takes place in Dover, Del., on June 1 from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. There will be food trucks and live music. Free entry. Delaware’s first ever Pride Parade is from 9-10 a.m. Pittsburgh Pride is June 1-9. Pride Rocks PGH is June 7-8 at Fort Duquesne Boulevard at 7th Street. On June 7, pop/rock band Walk the Moon will perform. R&B singer Toni Braxton and singer/songwriter Rina Sawayama will perform on June 8. PrideFest is on June 8-9 at Fort Duquesne Boulevard between 7th Street and 9th Street and the Andy Warhol Bridge. There will be 175 vendors, food booths, entertainment on three stages, free STI and HIV testing and more. The Equality March kicks off June 9 at 12:30 p.m. The march starts at the Blvd. of the Allies, turns left onto Grant Street, left onto Fifth Avenue and ends at Liberty Avenue.For more event information, visit pittsburghpride.org. Philly Pride Parade and Festival is June 9. Parade starts at 11:30 a.m. at 13th and Locust Streets and festival gates open at noon at the Great Plaza at Penn’s Landing. There is a $15 cover charge. For details, visit phillygaypride.org. Hampton Roads Pride is June 2122. The Pride Block Party is June 21 from 7 p.m.-midnight at Scope Arena (201 E Brambleton Ave., Norfolk, Va.). Pridefest is June 22 from noon-8 p.m. at Town Point Park (113 Waterside Dr., Norfolk, Va.). Pride at the Beach is on June 23 from 2-7 p.m. at 31st Street Park (Virginia Beach, Va.). Singer JoJo is the headliner. For more information, visit hamptonroadspride.org. Prides listed below haven’t released 2019 event details but save the date: Frederick Pride is at the Carroll Creek Amphitheater (Carroll Creek Linear Park, Frederick, Md.) on June 22 from 11 a.m.-6 p.m. For more details, visit frederickpride.org. Hagerstown Pride is July 13 from 11:30 a.m.-6 p.m. in the Central Lot and Elizabeth Hager Center Lot (14 N Potomac St., Hagerstown, Md.). For details, visit hagerstownhopesmd.org. Shenandoah Valley Pride Festival is on Sept. 21 at 80 Court Square, Harrisonburg, Va. For more information and updates, visit shenandoahvalleypride.org. VA Pridefest is Sept. 28 on Brown’s Island (Richmond, Va.). Visit vapride.org.


DR. RUTH WESTHEIMER and Director RYAN WHITE. Photo by Austin Hargrave; courtesy Hulu

For Dr. Ruth, it’s all about respect Nonagenarian sex therapist is subject of new Hulu doc

By BRIAN T. CARNEY Dr. Ruth’s sex advice boils down to one bedrock principle: “respect is not debatable.” And although she’s been a longtime champion of LGBT rights, her most basic sex advice could apply to anyone. “There is not such thing as normal,” she says during a phone interview. “Anything two consenting adults do is all right. I hoped that by saying that publicly a lot of people would listen to it. Young people must know there is support for them.” At age 90, revolutionary sex and relationship therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer is still going strong. The diminutive doctor with the thick German accent, the distinctive voice and the trademark cackle is still teaching college classes, lecturing around the world and working on a new edition of “Sex For Dummies.” She’s also promoting “Ask Dr. Ruth,” the excellent new Hulu documentary about her amazing life. The movie, which opened at the Sundance Film Festival,

opens theatrically in D.C. today at the Landmark Bethesda Row Cinema and drops on Hulu on June 1. Dr. Ruth Westheimer was born Karola Ruth Siegel on June 4, 1928 near Frankfurt Germany. In November 1938, on the morning after Kristallnacht, her beloved father was arrested by Nazis. Shortly thereafter she was sent to a boarding school in Switzerland as part of the Kindertransport. Both her parents were killed in the Holocaust. In the movie, Westheimer makes a poignant visit to Yad Vashem, the World Holocaust Remembrance Center in Jerusalem, to commemorate their lives and to come to terms with her own status as a Holocaust survivor. After the war, she moved to Israel where she served a s a sniper and was badly injured in 1948 during the Palestine War. She moved to Paris with her first husband in 1950 and emigrated to America with her second husband in 1956. She married her third husband, Fred Westheimer in 1961; the two lived together for over 30 years until his death in 1997. Following years of education and specialized training in human sexuality, as well as a stint working for Planned Parenthood in Harlem, Dr. Ruth stumbled into broadcasting. Her first show, “Sexually Speaking,” debuted on WYNY-FM in 1980. Although it only ran for 15 minutes every Sunday at midnight, it quickly became a media sensation. By 1982 it was the highest-rated radio show in the New York market and by 1983 the show was syndicated nationally. Soon, Dr, Ruth was hosting television

shows, making appearances on late night television, writing best-selling books and holding court as a frequent guest on “The Hollywood Squares.” But, in the middle of this media frenzy, there was serious work to be done. Dr. Ruth was a pioneer in openly discussing female sexuality (she famously made talk show host Arsenio Hall say the word “vagina” on air) and in supporting gays. She was also one of the first public figures to publicly discuss the HIV/AIDS crisis. “I had a couple of friends that died of that mysterious disease that nobody really had a name for,” she says.“I remember I went to visit one friend. I brought him a teddy bear and the next day he was dead. Gay people were a despised minority. As a German Jewish refugee, I took it very seriously. I had a lot of friends that died.” Even with the advent of PrEP, Dr. Ruth is still anxious about the transmission of AIDS and other STIs. “I’m worried about young people,” she says. “They say, ‘We have a medication so there’s no big deal.’ That’s a terrible mistake.” The media-savvy therapist, who says that she will never retire, thinks that this year’s Pride celebrations are a great opportunity to reinforce the message about safer sex. “You have an obligation to talk to younger people. Use the anniversary of Stonewall to talk about sex.” “Ask Dr. Ruth” is directed by Ryan White, award-winning director of the documentary “The Case Against 8” and the Netflix docuseries “The Keepers.” Westheimer and White were introduced by producer Rafael Marmor. Dr. Ruth was reluctant to have a movie made about her, but she agreed after she saw “No Place on Earth,” a 2012 documentary that Marmor produced. “You should mention that film,” she says. “It’s about 31 Jews who survived World War II in an underground cave in Poland. I watched the film and I was very impressed. I was also very taken by the title because that was my story. After World War II where would I have gone? They had to create Palestine so every Jew had a place to go.” Beyond her advice on good sex and great orgasms, Dr. Ruth is strictly nonpartisan and avoids discussing topics where she feels she has not done the necessary research, saying, “I have made it an absolute rule of my life not to talk about things that are not my expertise.” But there are some issues Westheimer does feel compelled to discuss. “I don’t do politics except to stand up when I see children being separated from their families. That’s my story. And abortion must remain legal and I am very worried about funding for Planned Parenthood.” Dr. Ruth is also very worried about the rise of anti-Semitism in the United States, but overall, she remains hopeful. “I’m a big optimist,” she says. “I love this country. For me, America is a very wonderful place. It will survive. These are difficult times, but we will survive.” And, as the wonderful documentary “Ask Dr. Ruth” clearly illustrates, Westheimer is definitely a survivor.

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MATTHEW RIEMER (left) and partner LEIGHTON BROWN. Washington Blade photo by Michael Key

Preserving our past

New book is spin-off of popular LGBT history Instagram page By JAMES WELLEMEYER

Matthew Riemer is shocked how many people think the Stonewall Riots were the beginning of the LGBT liberation movement. “We are teaching kids from the getgo that their history started in 1969. It’s ridiculous,” Riemer says. “As queer people, we’re this group who have been denied our history.” He and his partner Leighton Brown, both attorneys and Washington residents, run the popular @lgbt_history Instagram account and are now coming out with a book on the history of LGBT activism. “We Are Everywhere: Protest, Power and Pride in the History of Queer Liberation” (Ten Speed Press) will be released on Tuesday, May 7 and its two authors sat down with the Blade for an interview. They’ll be at Solid State Books (600 H St., N.E.) on Wednesday, May 8. It’s free and starts at 7 p.m. The men created the account as a personal project after realizing they didn’t know much about their own history themselves. Riemer does the text-based research and Brown finds photos for the account. “We were just on a personal quest to learn, and we had gotten a little bit obsessive about it,” Brown says. “A little bit obsessive” probably doesn’t do justice to the account or the research the two men have conducted. Brown and Riemer first posted on Jan. 17, 2016. Just over three years later, they have nearly 5,000 posts and about 380,000 followers. Each post is an image of an event in LGBT history or simply a historical photograph of LGBT people. These photos are accompanied by anywhere from a few lines to multiple paragraphs of descriptive text. Recent posts include a picture of the “How Gay is Gay” cover from TIME in 1979. Under it is a description of the article, which discussed the rise of gays and lesbians choosing to live openly. Another features an image of trans activist Marsha P. Johnson in Hoboken, N.J., on Easter Sunday. Both men say the account has seen gradual growth to where it is today. “It’s been just steady progress,” Brown says, while also noting that Laverne Cox regrammed a couple of their photos in the early stages. Riemer wants to emphasize that the account is more than just another social media page. It’s become a well-research archive for LGBT history. “We hope we are taken seriously and we believe we deserve to be taken seriously,” Riemer says. “We don’t write anything that can’t be backed up with primary, or at least secondary, sources.” They cite those sources, too. “We’ve been very serious about crediting and, when it’s possible, tagging photographers, archivists and activists or whoever is in the picture,” Riemer says. Brown and Riemer love the platform Instagram provides them. But they also realize it comes with restrictions. “The account is limiting not only in that it’s 2,200 characters but also in that queer

history is really all connected,” Riemer says. “We weren’t able to show that on the account. There’s no hyperlinking. We don’t know if people are reading the captions. And we don’t know when people started following.” That’s how the idea of a book emerged. “We Are Everywhere” comes out in a few days, just in time for the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall riots. But its content stretches back long before Stonewall and details LGBT history up until the early 2000s in a nearchronological manner. Chapters include large glossy images, curated by Brown, and accompanying narrative, written by Riemer. And it doesn’t focus on the events one might expect to see. “You don’t read that much about gays in the military or gay marriage,” Riemer says of the book. “We want to talk about queer history, our history, not our story of how we related to the straight people.” Reimer remembers that when he first came out as gay, he “tried to be the straight-gay.” “A lot of us did that and still do, especially gay, cis white men,” he says. His research into LGBT history changed his mind on how he had to act and who he had to be. “We don’t fit into the broader society,” Brown says. “And that’s great,” Riemer chimes in. “The book isn’t just about a few moments where we have had some clear advancement with respect to the larger society,” Brown says. “It’s about all the good and bad that got us to that advancement and the setbacks in between.” And it took hours of archival research to put the book together. Riemer left his job as an attorney to work on the book full time when he and Brown signed the deal with Ten Speed Press. He started writing the text over a year ago and visited more than 10 archives across the country as well as a bunch more online to weave the book together. “We just wanted to get it right, and it’s been absolutely exhausting,” Riemer says. The book has already received praise from giants within the LGBT community. Anderson Cooper, who also follows the @LGBT_History Instagram account, wrote: “Our history hasn’t been taught in schools; it’s been passed from person to person, whispered through the ages, often in the dark of night between lovers. But whisper no more. Here we are, in these pages — our pride and power, our blood and tears, our love and laughter. This is our fight, our history, and we must learn it.” Now that the book is finished and its release is around the corner, Riemer and Brown are focusing on promoting it. They have events at college campuses across the country and in June, they’re slated to speak at the LGBT Center in New York. “We Are Everywhere,” the two men hope, brings to life the stories of the radicals of the LGBT liberation movement. “What we’ve found is it’s always been the craziest, the most outlandish, the loudest — the ones who the mainstreamers say, ‘We’re not all like that’ — those were the ones who create the space for the rest of us,” Riemer says.

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When Michael Kahn asks you to do something, you do it. It’s that simple. And so, playwright/actor Ellen McLaughlin explains the genesis of her latest work, “The Oresteia” — not a translation of Aeschylus’ trilogy about revenge, murder and justice, but rather a new version freely adapted from the Greek classic. In the spring of 2016, Kahn and McLaughlin met for coffee in Manhattan. The out director confided that he planned to end his long and illustrious tenure as artistic director of D.C.’s Shakespeare Theatre Company by directing a play based on the original and he wanted McLaughlin to write it. “The offer came with just two stipulations: First, Aeschylus’ three plays must be performable in one evening,” McLaughlin says. “And secondly, the primordial, vengeful goddesses found in ‘The Eumenides,’ the final piece of the trilogy, needed to be really scary without costuming the actors as monsters. I accepted his challenging offer on the spot.” Aeschylus is the first of the great Greek dramatists. He actually came up with the dramatic form. In “The Oresteia,” the first and second tragedies of the trilogy include Agamemnon’s murder by his wife and her lover and his wife and lover’s murder by Agamemnon’s son Orestes. The third play is about justice. The ancient Greeks did not take matricide lightly. There’s a hugeness and majesty to what Aeschylus does, so the project was daunting, she recalls. But McLaughlin had successfully adapted the Greeks before, so she knew what to do. Since she doesn’t read Greek, McLaughlin relies on extant translations. After much reading, she pushes the translations away and gets down to writing wherever she might be (jobs take her far and wide), but mostly in her orderly, light-filled study in Nyack, N.Y., a quiet town on the Hudson River. Working with Kahn has exceeded her expectations. “What Michael has done is completely unprecedented in my experience as a writer,” she says. “He gave me complete freedom. He advised me to move away from the source and not worry about him or Aeschylus, but rather to find my own solution to the problem. And that is one of the greatest gifts a writer could ever get.” What’s more, throughout the rehearsal process, Kahn was generous in allowing McLaughlin to speak directly to the actors. “That’s very unusual for a director. But at this point in his career he has enough confidence in himself that he doesn’t have to protect his position in the room. He’s the top of the food chain. It’s remarkable and testament to his experience and how easily that experience rides on him.” From the start, McLaughlin’s career has been two-pronged. She’s a playwright whose works have received numerous national and international productions, and an actor who has worked on and Off Broadway as well as extensively in regional theater. On the acting track, she is best known for originating the role of the Angel in out playwright Tony Kushner’s seminal work “Angels in America.” “There’s nothing quite like working on Broadway,” she says. “And doing a profoundly important piece that meant so much to so many made the experiences that much more. We were creating a central

cultural event that would resonate in so many ways out into American and world culture; it would change the way people think.” McLaughlin says “Angels” worked largely because of its lead character, Prior. “The momentous thing Tony did was to have Prior, the American everyman at the middle of this long and complicated saga, be a flamboyantly gay man with AIDS. That was revolutionary. And because he used humor, people were defenseless against it. You have to love Prior. You can’t deny that he’s profoundly brave. He’s a hero.” She recalls a post-matinee talk back with a group of young Mormons. Mclaughlin and Stephen Spinella (the out actor who played defiant Prior Walter) were seated on the lip of the stage. A pretty, blonde girl raised her hand, stood and directed her comment to Spinella. “Everyone and everything in my life has taught me to hate you, and still, I love you.” They embraced and cried. “If that’s the only thing we accomplished,” Mclaughlin says, “It was all worth it.” Growing up in Chevy Chase, Md.., McLaughlin developed an interest in the arts early on. At Sidwell Friends School, she was exposed to Quaker pacifism, acted in plays, and also learned to paint scenery, a skill that got her through some lean years after graduating from Yale. Meeting Michael Kahn in the late ‘80s was a bright spot in her early career. At the time, Kahn was teaching acting at the Julliard School in New York while also helming STC in Washington (testament to his legendary energy), and McLaughlin was hired as playwright in residence at Julliard. “I got paid to hang around. I wasn’t required to write anything. I had access to everything except for Michael’s acting classes, those are private. I understood but was still curious.” McLaughlin looks to the Greeks for guidance in today’s world. And unfortunately, “The Oresteia” which explores the contrast between violent revenge and true justice along with the transition from personal vendetta to organized litigation, remains all too relevant. She describes the current atmosphere in America as a cycle of violence in which the right is trying to take back the ground, they feel they’ve lost. And in turn, the left feels a desire for retribution. “It’s a kind of politics and way of living that’s brutal and doesn’t bring out the best in any of us,” she says. The Greeks brought all of their big issues — how to treat each other, how to treat the gods, what’s a good life, what’s an ethical life — to the theater, and consequently that’s why everyone gathered to see these beautiful yet disturbing plays filled with difficult images. “They tell the most difficult stories and ask, but never answer, the hardest questions. That’s why I keep coming back to the Greeks,” McLaughlin says.

‘The Oresteia’

Through June 2 Shakespeare Theatre Company Sidney Harman Hall 610 F St., N.W. $44-118 202-547-1122 shakespearetheatre.org

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ELLEN McLAUGHLIN says after two initial stipulations, STC Founder Michael Kahn gave her freedom for their collaboration ‘The Oresteia.’ Photo courtesy STC

An angel’s latest assignment

Actress/playwright Ellen McLaughlin relishes working with Michael Kahn By PATRICK FOLLIARD


It’s film festival season By BRIAN T. CARNEY

A 1919 queer-themed silent film ‘Different From the Others’ will be screened at JxJ, a reboot of the Washington Jewish Film Festival. Photo courtesy JxJ

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This week, the Washington Jewish Film Festival (WJFF) returns in an exciting new format. A program of the Eldavitch D.C.-JCC, the new multi-disciplinary arts festival called JxJ encompasses the WJFF and the Washington Jewish Music Festival and will also incorporate original cutting-edge hybrid arts programming. According to JxJ director Ilya Tovbis, the new festival will include 83 feature-length and 21 short films from 22 countries, as well as live musical performances, art exhibits, conversations with artists, food and more. The celebration of the global Jewish experience will include programming in 30 or so languages. JxJ will include the return of “Rated LGBTQ,” the popular queer cinema series, along with a new programming strand called BEATSxJ that will focus on cinema that showcases music and musicians. The festival opens May 8 with “Redemption,” a moving and exuberant film about a single father who returns to his rocker past to raise money for his daughter’s medical treatment.The festival closes May 26 with “The Tobacconist” about a young man’s friendship with Sigmund Freud during the Nazi occupation of Vienna. Freud is played by the legendary actor Bruno Ganz in his final film performance. This year, “Rated LGBTQ” includes five fascinating films. Two movies offer a historic view of the fight for LGBT liberation. “The Einstein of Sex” by acclaimed director Rosa von Praunheim chronicles the efforts of German Jewish sexologist Magnus Hirschfeld to challenge anti-homosexual laws in the decade leading up to World War II. The 1919 silent queer classic “Different From the Others” is about a young musician who is blackmailed when his relationship with another man is discovered. On a more contemporary note, “Shooting Life” and “Family in Transition” examine the challenges of dealing with sexual and gender identity in present-day Israel. Finally, the fascinating “Black Hat” (part of the “Set Apart” program of short films) is about a Hasidic man whose double life is threatened when he loses his hat. In addition, LGBT fans of musicals will want to check out “Fiddler: A Miracle of Miracles,” a history of the beloved and ground-breaking musical “Fiddler on the Roof” and “Mack the Knife: Brecht’s Threepenny Film,” a surrealistic recreation of the chaotic filming of Brecht’s infamous decadent socialistic critique of capitalism.

LGBT music fans will want to check out “Book of J,” a charming duo whose vocal stylings encompass Yiddish songs, Piedmont blues and queer politics, and “Isle of Klesbos,” an all-gal klezmer sextet that has performed at Pride celebrations all over the world. Meanwhile in Baltimore, the Maryland Film Festival runs May 8-12. Now in its 21st year, the festival will present over 50 films in Baltimore’s revitalized Station North arts district. One of the perennial highlights is a screening personally curated by iconic Baltimore filmmaker and festival board member John Waters. This year’s pick is “Mom and Dad.” Starring Nicolas Cage and Selma Blair, the 2017 flop is about a mysterious pandemic that causes parents to attack their children. Directors Carolina Monnerat and Theodore Collatos will be on hand to host the world premiere of “Queen of Lapa,” a powerful documentary about Luana Muniz, a proud veteran transgender sex worker who runs a “hostel” for a new generation of trans kids on Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. “Being Impossible” is about Ariel, a young woman who discovers that she was born intersex and now faces difficult decisions about how to live the rest of her life. Some of the wonderful queer shorts include “Docking,” in which Canadian writer/ director Trevor Anderson reflects on his fear of dating; “Lavender” about a young man who becomes increasingly entangled in the marriage of an older couple; “Only Trumpets” about a young man and his relationship with sexual technology; “Miller & Son” about a transwoman mechanic who runs her family’s auto shop during the day and expresses her femininity at night; and “Something to Cry About,” a touching and humorous documentary about the difficulty of expressing intimacy between men, the complexities of desire and the gift of a good cry.

JxJ

May 8-26 Various venues in Metro Washington Tickets and schedules at jxjdc.org.

Maryland Film Festival

May 8-12 Various venues in Baltimore’s Station North mdfilmfest.com

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All Stars: Stonewall Kickball By KEVIN MAJOROS

UMPENDRA SHEVADE and VIC JONES, members of Stonewall Kickball. Shevade photo by Ian Foulk; Jones photo courtesy Jones

The Washington Blade All Star series continues to spotlight the journeys of members of the LGBT sports community in Washington. This week we meet two LGBT players who have found their place in Stonewall Kickball. Everyone has seen the packs of Stonewall Kickball players walking through the streets of D.C. on Sunday afternoons. With their colorful team shirts, they’re hard to miss as they make their way to the postgame events. After moving into the District, Upendra Shevade noticed them and a quick Google search showed an upcoming registration for the Spring 2018 season. Shevade’s work with Amazon had brought him to the area in 2010 and he had been living near Dulles Airport. He was finding many challenges to making friends, especially gay ones. He showed up to a Stonewall Kickball new player event not really sure what to expect. “I walked in and it was a really warm environment. I ended up joining a new team that was forming,” Shevade says. “This was a chance for something different. I had nothing to lose and potentially a lot to gain.” Growing up in Mumbai, India, Shevade played soccer until middle school. He began to distance himself from sports when he realized he was different from other boys. That awareness made sports feel intimidating. After receiving his undergraduate degree in India, Shevade moved to Austin in 2003 to pursue his graduate degree and Ph.D. in computer science from University of Texas at Austin. Before coming to America, Shevade had never heard of kickball. First up in his Stonewall Kickball experience was learning the rules and nuances of the sport. “I really had to play catch-up on terminology and strategy. I’m still learning in my third season and I love the game,” Shevade says. “There is a lot of specialization in various positions with different skill sets needed to excel. I feel like I have found my spot in right field.” Shevade has also played in Stonewall Dodgeball and Stonewall Yoga, both of which have added to the many life lessons he has learned along the way. “Stonewall has provided me with a sense of community and I like that we are all working together towards a common goal,” Shevade

says. “One good thing about sports is that they are also a mechanism for growing as a person. I’ve discovered you can be friends with anyone and it feels really great.” Vic Jones played a little bit of everything growing up in Lake Elsinore, Calif. — basketball, soccer, karate, baseball and football. He ran track and cross country in high school along with being a band kid as a drum major and saxophone player. Band and sports taught him a lot about leadership and balancing multiple things in life, but he would leave both behind when he arrived at Howard University at 18. “I thought I would walk onto the track team and join band, but everything was different,” Jones says. “I was intimidated by going to a black school. I was used to being the only black person.” Jones did join a step club at Howard but focused on his studies to earn his Ph.D in clinical psychology. He is now working as a postdoctoral fellow with the DC VA Medical Center. He joined Stonewall Dodgeball in 2015 with a friend before moving on to Stonewall Kickball the following year. The kickball league sparked a competitive streak and he fell in love with the sport. “I made some amazing friends that made me feel comfortable,” Jones says. “I never realized that losing could be so fun when the loss comes from a good competition.” Jones started meeting other players who were just as competitive and began joining other leagues. He is currently playing on three kickball leagues and is a member of a travel team. One of his Stonewall Kickball teams, Alpha Q Up, has won the title at the last two Sin City Classic tournaments in Las Vegas. This summer members are hoping to continue their success at the Stonewall Sports National Tournament in Raleigh. “It’s great to be branching out and playing people who are better players. Each team I have been on has been unique with its own vibe and culture,” Jones says. “It’s nice to reach that level of confidence and trust and know that everyone is just as dedicated as you are, giving 110 percent. We all put in the work and it pays off.”

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P!nk’s new album disappoints

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Mellower, less distinctive record features only momentary flashes of greatness By THOM MURPHY

P!NK has always been a breath of fresh air in pop music. Sadly her new record lacks the punch and buzz of her earlier records. Photo courtesy RCA

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Punk, independent, rebellious — these are just a few of the adjectives that P!nk brings to mind. From “Just Like A Pill” to “U+Ur Hand” and “So What,” her music has been synonymous with a defiant, feminist attitude that is refreshing in the predictable romantic intrigues of most pop songs. But with her 2017 album “Beautiful Trauma,” P!nk’s music has taken a softer turn. Her newly released “Hurts 2B Human” continues in this direction, making this her least rambunctious album so far. Of course, it’s normal for artist to go through major changes over the course of their careers, and P!nk has already had several distinct stylistic periods. The earliest album “Can’t Take Me Home” (2000) has strong R&B influences, as does “Missundaztood” (2001), though it begins to turn toward pop/ rock. By the release of “I’m Not Dead” (2003), especially on albums “I’m Not Dead” (2006) and “Funhouse” (2008), her music had taken a seeming definitive turn toward rock. With the “Beautiful Trauma” in 2017, however, her music becomes decidedly more self-reflective, a change that was well received by fans — the album landed at the Billboard no. 1 spot. But charts are not, of course, correlated to quality, and P!nk seems to be losing much of what makes her music distinct. The new album opens with “Hustle,” an uptempo pop track that has some of the attitude of the older P!nk albums. Her vocals are still top-notch, but the music is without its usual edge. “(Hey Why) I Miss You Sometime” is a mediocre dance-pop track with banal lyrics, almost to the point of absurdity: “Big time Johnny Cash kind of love/McDonald’s type of love/Can’t find my clothes kind of love/We dominate this love.” It’s a mostly meaningless wash of pop culture references. The lead single “Walk Me Home” is standard pop fare, but works well nonetheless. It’s incredibly catchy and destined for significant radio play. And it’s certainly one of the better tracks on the album. The same could be said for “Hurts 2B Human,” another inoffensive pop cut.

“Can We Pretend,” one of the more danceable tracks on the album, is unlikely to earn her any political points. It espouses a kind of escapism at the opposite pole from Barbra Streisand’s music activism, and equally clunky: “Can we pretend that we both like the president?/Can we pretend that I really like your shoes? Hell yeah/Can we pretend? ‘Cause honestly, reality, it bores me.” The unfortunate part about P!nk’s new album is its commonality. Most of the songs could be sung be absolutely anyone. And this has never been the case with P!nk. A rendition of “U+Ur Hand” by any other artist is unimaginable. The album is not bad so much as disappointing in its mediocrity. One of the most distinct voices in pop music is starting to sound like every other. “Courage,” another of the inoffensive yet predictable tracks on the album, repeats a vocal hook quite similar to the one in Katy Perry’s “Chained To The Rhythm,” and indeed, it sounds like a pop song that is already two years old. The album has a few happy exceptions, mostly in the way of semi-acoustic tracks. It makes one think a mostly acoustic album would have worked much better. “My Attic” is among the happy few. Her vocals are excellent throughout and musically, it’s one of the more harmonically complex songs on the album. The best song is without a doubt her duet with country singer Chris Stapleton. It’s a surprisingly good country song, one that may well find its way to country radio. It’s a bold choice and a testament to P!nk’s versatility as an artist. And the song is beautiful, even if she goes a little carried away with the country accent. Likewise, the song “Circle Game,” which talks about motherhood and her relationship with her daughter, is a touching, well-crafted track. But if the album takes a turn for the better around the last four songs, it’s too little too late. The path to mediocrity is well trodden. Nonetheless, it is a shame to see such a singular voice head in that direction.

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MICHAEL RADKOWSKY

琀栀攀

Closet charade

My girlfriend wants me to pretend I’m just a ‘friend’ when her parents visit MICHAEL,

MICHAEL REPLIES:

My girlfriend is graduating from law school in May and her parents are coming to D.C. for her graduation. Kristy isn’t out to her parents. They have heard of me, but only as a good friend of Kristy’s. We have been dating for a little over a year. Kristy wants me to be at her graduation and wants me to pretend we’re just friends in front of her parents. I don’t want to participate in a charade. This means not going to her graduation. Or, if I go to the ceremony, it means staying away from her and her parents, so that we aren’t together on her big day. Kristy is mad at me because I’m refusing to go. We’ve already had a version of this fight when her parents came for a visit last fall and she wanted me to meet them as “just a friend.” But this time is worse because it’s her graduation from law school. Her parents are staying with her at her apartment and I asked her what she will do with the pictures of the two of us she has out. Kristy told me she is going to hide them. I think this is a pathetic move and a horrible idea to lie to her parents about our relationship. If we stay together, how would she backpedal from having told them we’re just friends? Lying makes everything too complicated. Kristy says she isn’t ready to come out to her parents now. I asked her what she’s afraid of if she does come out to them, and all she could say was that she doesn’t want to let them down. She says she knows they’d be unhappy if they knew she was lesbian. Outside of this, Kristy is really cool and has a lot of self-confidence. I just don’t get it. How do I get though to her that she’s perpetuating a really bad situation? Also, how do I deal with her insisting that I “be there” for her at her graduation when this means pretending we’re not a couple? Kristy tells me I am being an unsupportive girlfriend and that I should be more understanding that her parents would give her a tough time and evidently be devastated. She says I’m basically a spoiled brat for thinking it’s easy for everyone to come out, because both my parents have gay siblings and are really gay-positive. I understand that coming out isn’t always easy, and I don’t think I’m unsupportive for thinking it’s important to come out to your parents and be honest. Help?

You can’t get Kristy to behave or think the way you do, or the way you’d like her to. Just as she can’t get you to do her bidding. You each can advocate for what you’d like from your girlfriend, but you have to let go of the outcome. This may mean accepting each other as you are, if you do want to be together at present. Can you make your peace with having a girlfriend who isn’t out to her parents? That absolutely does not mean that you must pretend to be straight or lie about your relationship to them. It simply means tolerating that Kristy is not out to them. Can Kristy be OK with having a girlfriend who won’t participate in her charade with her parents? If so, you and Kristy might have a viable relationship, for the time being. Obviously, this situation isn’t workable long-term, if the two of you want to take steps such as getting married, having a child or just including her parents in your lives in any kind of honest way. If you’re willing to tolerate the situation, waiting to see what Kristy does while honoring your own bottom line of behavior, then you can stay in this relationship — for now. This would mean letting Kristy decide for herself how she wants to proceed, without your suggestions, prodding or ultimatums. Similarly, if Kristy wants a healthy, mutually respectful relationship, she would be wise to respect your choices and stop trying to shame you into doing what she wants. Shaming at times serves a valuable purpose, but it is too often an ugly tool employed from a place of low functioning to manipulate another person. You can’t get Kristy to stop this behavior, although you can certainly ask.You do get to choose whether or not you want to keep living with it: If you decide that you don’t want to be in this relationship with Kristy as she is, you are free to go. The same point holds true for Kristy. If you’re considering staying put for the present, here is a question to consider: Is Kristy taking any steps to deal with her fears about letting her parents down? If she’s not, you have good reason to be skeptical that she will change her stance anytime soon.

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Are you looking for the simple life? Owning a home in the country offers many benefits By ROBIN GARBE It’s no secret that spending time in nature and just being outside can lead to significant health benefits. A simple Google search will lead you to multiple articles and studies that prove that a walk in the woods can improve physical and mental health. But really, who needs a scientist to tell us how much we enjoy breathing fresh air. We just know. We are drawn to open spaces when we need to “get away from it all.” Life has become so complicated; and most of us have an overwhelming desire to “Simplify.” For some, this need is strong enough to prompt a total lifestyle change. People express many reasons for moving to the country. Mostly, it’s a need to escape sprawl and congestion; and reside in a more peaceful and scenic setting. For many, there seems to be the need to return to their roots; get their hands dirty, grow their own vegetables, maybe even have enough space to have some animals. Living in the country, whether as a weekend or permanent getaway, offers a rich and rewarding experience. We are lucky enough, in the D.C. area, to have access to the Virginia Piedmont region and the Blue Ridge mountains within about an hour’s drive, with some of the most spectacular scenery in the country. But don’t let the bucolic setting fool you. This “simple life” may not be as simple as you’d think. Purchasing country property can actually be more complex than buying a single family home in town. Imagine this scenario: You’ve hired a Realtor who sells your home in the suburbs in two days, and now you are ready to buy your dream farm. He’s never worked outside of Arlington, but he sure did an excellent job selling your house, so you hire him

Living in the country, whether as a weekend or permanent getaway, offers a rich and rewarding experience. Photo courtesy Garbe

to represent you on your buy side. He sends you listings, shows you properties, and you ratify a contract on the ideal farmette. Everyone celebrates. Inspections begin and questions and issues for which you weren’t prepared arise. Things you just hadn’t considered. Remorse sets in. Who knew there was no road maintenance agreement, and you will have to fix those crater-sized potholes yourself? Or the land is subject to covenants and restrictions that prevent you from keeping farm animals? What a shock to find out, that there is NO high speed Internet available and you can’t even work from home. Or to discover at settlement that the property is in “land use” and you‘ll be responsible for five years’ worth of “roll back taxes.” Unfortunately, these are just a few real life examples. But these alarming situations can easily be avoided.

M AY 0 3 , 2 0 1 9 • WA SHINGTONBLA D E.COM • 45

Here are a few tips to help make your move to the country successful. 1. Most importantly, find an excellent Realtor that has a passion for country property. Interview at least three agents, and of course read their reviews. Attending open houses is a great way to meet local Realtors in person. 2. Get pre-approved for financing that is appropriate for the property you want to buy. A second home, property that generates income, large acreage, and property with multiple residences may require special financing. 3. Take time to explore and really get to know the areas you are considering. Make it fun – go to the shops and restaurants, the festivals, meet the people, hike the trails. Stay overnight whenever possible and go often. 4. Set realistic expectations. Because it can be difficult to find a property that

meets all of your criteria, you’ll need to prioritize. Find a Realtor that is connected locally, and can utilize her network to seek out properties that might not be on the market currently. Your peaceful country retreat is waiting for you. So, go ahead, put on your boots, fire up the four wheel drive, and find an agent that can guide you safely down all of those windy, back roads that lead to your dream home — be they figurative or literal.

Robin Garbe is Realtor with Long & Foster in Warrenton,Va., serving Fauquier, Culpeper, Rappahannock and surrounding counties since 2003. She owns a 22-acre farm she has shared with her horses, goats, chickens, dogs, cats and her husband.


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