WASTED! Magazine issue #8 by WASTED! Magazine

INTRODUCING: SINCERITY

WE TALK SHIT WITH ACCIDENTS!

ALT BEAUTIES: JESSICA ANN | INTERVIEW: CALICO STREE RIOT | REVIEWS | EVENTS

wastedmagazine.co.uk Facebook | Twitter | Tumblr Editor Zoe Blush Creative Director Vicky Webb Photography Robbie Candy Martin Hobby Rachael Tucker Vicky Webb Tommy Reynolds Zoe Blush Emma Duggan

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Writers Ian Gregory Vicky Webb Jez Silcock Zoe Blush Harry English Emma Duggan Pete Wilson Advertising Vicky Webb Website Sam Detnon

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PAGE 3: INTRODUCING: SINCERITY PAGE 4: BLUSH BANTER PAGE 5: GRAPHIC DEMISE PAGE 7: ALT GIRL: JESSICA ANN PAGE 9: WE INTERVIEW: ACCIDENTS PAGE 12: WE REVIEW: ACCIDENTS ‘OPEN EYES’ PAGE 13: WE INTERVIEW: ASKING ALEXANDRIA! PAGE 21: WHILE SHE SLEEPS, OF MICE & MEN &

ASKING ALEXANDRIA ELECTRIC BALLROOM REVIEW

PAGE 23: YOG IS BACK! PAGE 25: WE REVIEW: FAITH ‘N’ FURY PAGE 27: GAMESGAMESGAMES! PAGE 29: PAPI WANG PAGE 30: EVENTS

Bonjour lovelies, WASTED! have had a very special month this time round, what with Dan & myself getting to interview the AA boys, finding out we’re going to be covering Hevy Fest - it’s all going a bit mental. So I’m not going to rant about what’s in this issue, because it pretty much speaks for itself. Instead, here’s a picture of me & Dan with Cameron & Sam of Asking Alexandria!

BLUSH BANTER Hai again guys, hope you’re all well & such. I was going to bang on about how promotion companies should stick together instead of waging war, but after staring blankly at my computer screen for a good few hours, & getting distracted by heavily worded debates on Facebook, I’ve decided to bang on about the ‘pay to play’ argument that’s floating around between bands & promoters at the moment instead. Okay so the main statement overriding everything is that local bands should not be paid to play small local gigs. Now on one hand I agree with this & on the other I don’t.

Q1 Who are you? We are Sincerity, Jamie on vocals, Dan Fletcher on Guitar, Nathan on Guitar, Dan Brabon on Bass, and Jack on drums. We’re from Kent, (Maidstone/ Sittingbourne). We all knew each other before the band, because we’d all been in bands or at least jammed together before. Q2 Where are you going? Gigs and gigs and gigs and gigs and gigs, and record a music video! Q3 What are your intentions? To gig and have as much fun as possible and get lot’s of experience. hopefully come across lots of rad people and bands!

Photography by Tommy Reynolds

Q4 What makes ‘Sincerity’ different? We have so many influences that come in to our playing styles, and we’re always coming up with new ideas. and seeing as we are all in to a wide veriety of music it makes things easier to write different stuff I guess! We’re really laid back, love to chat to any one about anything, so dont be afraid to come up to us and chat! Jamies vocals are also a big factor, as he’s really powerfull, and he is always working hard to improve!.. bless him Q5 why should our readers listen to ‘Sincerity’? WASTED! readers should listen to us, because we know what you want because we’re just like them, but we play

the music, instead of just listening to it. We are all really thankfull for anyone who gives our stuff a listen and helps spread the word for us. and to anyone who comes to our shows when we start! Catch them here: 12th May - Beacon Court (first show) 14th May - Nags Head, High Wycombe 15th May - Westcoast Bar, Margate 21st July - Beacon Court, Gillingham 13th August - Rafa, Chatham 3rd September - Rafa, Chatham 2nd October - Tap n Tin, Chatham

On the one hand there’s the whole idea that bands should be making music for the love of making music, & as a local band you shouldn’t even be thinking about money at this early stage in the game, you should simply be doing everything possible to get their name out there & to be recognised & gather a fan base. For example, a quote from Adam ‘Wee Man’ James: “If I wrote a book and only 1 person bought it but lent it to 10 of their mates and then those mates lent it out to their mates I would rather that than 50 people buy it and then no one else know about it.” This backs what I’m trying to say 112% On the other hand there’s the fact that (I imagine) being in a band isn’t exactly a cheap hobby & money is needed for equpiment & such, particularly if you’re a drummer? Which brings me nicely onto my opinion that ‘bigger’ local bands should be paid no more than smaller local bands. Smaller local bands are just starting out & are still learning & likely to go through a lot more equpiment faster than a bigger band

with more experience & skill. Another point is that you’ve got to have money to make money, & this applies in 98.6846% cases in life. Shit does not make itself. Fair enough saying that bands don’t need to be paid because they can survive off of merch, that’s all well & dandy, but where does the merch come from? Because I bet you anything, printing & recordiwng companies etc aren’t going to say anything on the lines of “Oh we’ll do it for you, for the love of what we do.” It would be lovely if they could, but lets be realistic guys, it’s just not going to happen. So of course if bands want to produce merch to get their name further out there, they’re going to need the money to do that in the first place. So where are they going to get that money? Well, as far as I can see, unless your some rich little prick being brought up on Mummy & Daddy’s pay check rather than your own (& don’t get me wrong, I spose you’re luck if you are, but most of us aren’t) then the only other place I see that it’s possible to do so would be from putting gigs on or your shitty little job down at Sainsburys.

QT OTM:

Ben Bruce of Asking Alexandria Most looking forward to:

At the end of the day bands & promotion companies should work together, afterall that’s essentially what they’re based on surely? We’re just trying to help you & in return you should help us, kinda thing. I just wish more people thought that it isn’t just money that makes the world go round.

Also something else I’d like to bring to your attention that is rather fucking exciting, to say the least. WASTED! Magazine are now going to be covering this year’s Hevy Fest!

CONTACT: Facebook: Zoe Blush Tumblr: talkingclocks.tumblr.com

Graphic Demise The Artist probably behind Your Demise’s branding. Why you should know about Barbara Kruger, and how she probably has already influenced your life. In short, she’s an american conceptual artist born in 1945, she studied hard, she worked hard, was employed by big names in the 70’s like Condé Nast, Mademoiselle Magazine, and Aperture. To most artistically trained - or to anyone that’s been to Tate in the last 30 years - her style is iconic, automatically recognisable. Kruger uses found imagery, usually black and white photographs, the best bit is, “[they] are culled from the mainstream magazines that sell the very ideas she is disputing.” she experimented with layers, long before photoshop was around, she applies text to these photographs as aggressive captions in a red slash usually in black or white futura or helvetica. These are the things that you may have noticed, that Your Demise have adopted. These are the devices I have applied to the layouts of this article. Krugers aggressive tone of voice has always appealed to me. She’s well read, opinionated and She’s got balls. She’s a woman we should look up to.

feminism, desire, consumerism, individual autonomy, are the topics she attacks. From this its evident that Your demise had no clue who Barbara Kruger was, and informed me that they were

been in Art, in popular culture, and in music, InFlames have had many a joke at popular identities, and made money from it with merchandise (e.g. Motorhead, Carlsburg) Skate brands are a prime example of this. I could show you a million t-shirt designs, but I really don’t think I need to.

taking the Supreme NYC (a popular skate clothing company EST 1994) and using it as ‘their own’ I was unable to get a statement from Supreme about this. I imagine Supreme were using Krugers graphic identity originally to mock her ideals of ‘I shop therefore I am’ anti-consumerism.

What gets my goat the most, is that there are PLENTY of talented graphic designers in the local scene and people aren’t using them, so they get jobs in TK Maxx, and forget about following their dream careers. But also, designers (and musicians) that think “Why bother? When you can get famous/rich copying something that’s already popular??” .... I suppose it makes sense in a way... it’s just completely fucking immoral. Please JUST TRY. Rather than filling my eyes with your half-hearted attempts of stealing other peoples designs.

Now, as Pablo Picasso may or may not have said; “Good Artists Borrow, Great Artists Steal”...but I am failing to see where Your Demise were borrowing this, it does appear to just have been undeniably stolen. I end with a Quote. I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks this way. Borrowing gives the impression that they’ve adapted it some how, but it “I like to make fun of musicians whom seems that this was forgotten when i feel plagiarize or offend music as art, they took the imagery from Supreme by exploiting their embarrassingly NYC. A big ol’ game of designese pathetic versions of their work” whispers unravels. Kurt Cobain. You could argue that the fact that they’ve made it more... iconically Recommended reading specific to them, has made it more their own than the original ‘author’s’. How to Steal like an artist Don’t get me wrong, pastiche and parody have been around for … well as long as post modernism has

What is your favourite song?

A/S/L?

“19 / Female / Gravesend”

TELL US 3 interesting facts about yourself?

“1. I own 52 neutical miles of land, it was bought for me as a present and therefore makes my title Lady Jessica of Sealand. 2. I can do the splits and get both my legs behind my head! 3. I have a undying love for Harry Potter! I am a total geek!” What made you want to get into Alt modelling & how did you go about it? “I was scouted! From a young age I was asked to model for a wedding shop and then at 16 a photographer wanted me for his portfolio, that got seen then I was asked to do various ‘Student’ shoots and portfolio’s, I was then again spotted and done the ‘Zoo student strip’ to which Nuts magazine wanted me to do Real Girls and Bedroom babes, since then my modelling has landed me some work on the hit tv show - The Only Way is Essex!”

What is your favourite band/style of music?

“I love all sorts! But I’m really in to dupstep at the moment. “

“Lady Gaga - Born this way, because I love the words and I think Lady Gaga is awesome! She doesn’t give a crap!”

What is your best past time?

“I really enjoy dramatics, so I’m often applying for castings or reading plays :)”

What was the best gig you’ve ever been to and why?

“Areosmith at the O2 - was amazing even if my dad got dragged out for moshing too hard!”

What is your favourite film?

“Role models - funny as fuck!”

What is your favourite alcoholic drink?

“Sambucca Longshot... And for those that don’t know what that is its white or pink sambucca with a dash of lemonade and some ice!”

Describe a typical night out for you?

“Getting the girls round mine,

JESSICA ANN

having a few drinks, getting ready and then we have a mooch into town, have a few drinks and then we get stupidly drunk and wake up on a bench somewhere!”

Where you think you’ll be in 5 years’ time?

“World famous and in america!”

Your claim to fame?

“I was in nuts magazine? And my sister snogged the base player from Airborne!”

Your dream job?

“Actress :)”

What (else) do you do & what do you enjoy about it? “I do a lot of acting jobs and I’m currently in pre production of a horror film, I love getting to play someone different, for instance I’ve played Hiitler! Other than that I get tattoo’s done!!” What is your most embarrassing moment to date? “I passed out

new years and puked all over a myself in the middle of central London!” What has been the best year of your life & why? “Last year, I met some fantastic people and had a great time having no responsibilities.”

WHAT ARE YOUR NAMES AND OCCUPATIONS? George: “I’m George I sing.” Eddie: “I’m Rodrigo I play lead guitar.” Glenn: “I’m Glenn and I play percussion.” Ben: “I’m Ben I just quit (rhythm guitar)”

Joe: “I play the useless instrument, what do you call it? Oh yeah bass.” Marcus: “And I make noises with my mouth.” How would you describe your music to a first time listener? Glenn: “Well I don’t know if I should answer this ‘cause I haven’t been here long, but I see it as like 2006 ‘emo screamo’, when First to Last and all that were about.” Ben: “I like that.” Glenn: “That’s why I like playing in this band.” George: “Yeah that’s what I had to say.” Ben: “Then Marcus is trying to be TRC.” Marcus: “I wish I was Chris.” YOU GUYS APPEAR TO HAVE BECOME POPULAR QUITE QUICKLY, WHAT DO YOU ATTRIBUTE THIS TO? Ben: “It’s kinda weird ‘cause we’ve been around a bit longer but we were shit

about 2 years ago and then we suddenly got good.” Marcus: “That’s pretty stuck up man.” Ben: “Yeah were still pretty shit now to be fair.” George: “We’re quite young as well so it takes awhile.” What would you describe as your musical influences and how does your noise sound? Ben: “I don’t know kinda like A Day to Remember, Devil wears Prada that kind of stuff.” Eddie: “Cannibal Corpse. Dying Fetus.” Ben: “TERA MELOS. They influence everyone.” If you could be another local band for a day, who would it be? Ben: “TRC.” Marcus: “Yeah TRC.” Glenn: “No way. They’re awful. I’ve only discovered them recently but I’d love to be Pianos

Words by: Harry English Photography by: Robbie Candy

So we managed to meet up with Accidents last night in a car park and interrogated them with drunken ramblings about quiffs and chinos, but more importantly, ABOUT music.

become Teeth.” Eddie: “No comment.” George: “I literally have no idea.” What HAS been your favourite band to play with so far? Joe: “Dethrone’s always a good one.” Glenn: “Sacred Betrayal a month ago, they were fucking good.” Marcus: “Just putting out there, we’ve played with Silent

Screams.” You’re playing with Adelaide tonight. They’re pretty big. How do you feel bout that? Marcus: “I’m happy… I’m excited.” Ben: “Their merch board shits all other ours.” Marcus: “They have fairy lights and we have a table.” What venue has been your favourite to play? And what venue would you like to play in the future? Marcus: “I want to play Underworld. Joe: “We were going to but it got cancelled.” Glenn: “I was going to say YOG always has pretty good venues.” George: “YOG IN THE PARK. YOG IN THE PARK. Shit that was so good.” Ben: “Although Eddie wasn’t there for that.” Speaking of Eddie, you’ve had loads of line up changes, do you feel like this is the strongest one

and that it’s going to stay this way for awhile? Glenn: “Well tonight’s my last night so...” Ben: “To be fair Glenn’s like a temporary member all the time anyway. How many different line-ups have we had?” Marcus: “Technically about five?” Ben: “Well George has played every instrument in the band at one point or another in the band.” Marcus: “It’s very impressive.” What’s your favourite track of the EP and why? Glenn: “Open Eyes ‘cause the chorus is a tune.” Marcus: “Personally my favourite is Noah’s Shark. I just because I like the name.” Ben: “Yeah I like Noah’s Shark.” George: “I’m going to have to agree with Glenn… Or Beginnings.” Joe: “Come hell or high water, ‘cause it’s the only song were I ever really do anything on bass.” Glenn: “Also, Beginnings is good cause the beginnings like

a rapist is telling a story.” Marcus: “That was George’s past life, he’s moved on now though.” Glenn: “No longer paid for it.” What do you guys plan on doing after your EP? Marcus: “I’m going to go home and sleep.” George: “Gig the shit out of it. Then we’ll probably get back to writing.” Ben: “I bored of the EP already.” There are rumours that you guys are trying to play Hevy Fest. Is that true? Marcus: “Well there was talks about it, but I don’t really know what’s going on with it. There’s still time!” George: “WE got put on the waiting list last year, so if anyone dropped out we’d take the spot. And they said we’d

definitely play this year, but we haven’t heard anything back yet.” Have you had anY embarrassing mOments on stage so far? Ben: “Our first proper, proper gig at Leo’s; I broke a string, my amp cut out, my pedal cut out and my amp cut out

bit. BUT, I carried on. Like a soldier.”

again. Then I got another person’s guitar and it wasn’t designed for metal at all and I just got a load of shitty feedback.” Glenn: “My snare broke second song in at a gig in Chatham so I had to play on the tom, it was a bit shit.” Ben: “Marcus chewed through his face once.” Marcus: “Yes I did chew through my face. We was at YOG and it was the Halloween show and I jumped down like an idiot and got smacked in the face and then my tooth went through my lip and it hurt a

little

If you could have a line up of any bands alive or dead, who would they be? George: “Devil Wears Prada, Fleet Foxes and shit I don’t know Laura Marling?” Eddie: “Dying Fetus they’re the best band in the world, Children of Bodom, Mariah Carey and just Joe Kosma.” Glenn: “A Crash Course in Collision maybe, Rebecca Black and Whitechapel (sarcasm)….” Ben: “Devil wears Prada headlining. Giraffes Giraffes ‘cause they put on some weird shows and Deee-lite a bit of dance from the 90’s.” Joe Kosma: Berzum. Just Berzum playing a 3-hour set. No probably, Atreyu, Fightstar, Opeth, Cannibal and urmm someone out the ordinary. Snoop Dog Marcus: I going to say Vanilla ice, TRC just ‘cause, Sweet Baby Clyde of course and I’d see the Locust just ‘cause Harry likes them.

Who would win in a fight. Charlie Sheen or Chuck Norris? George: “I’d like to say Charlie Sheen Eddie: I’m not answering that ‘cause that’s just stupid.” Glenn: “Chuck Norris, no dice.” Ben: “Charlie Sheen would just pass out and die.” Joe: “Charlie Sheen, he’s the warlock c’mon.” Marcus: “I’m going to agree with Joe and Charlie Sheen is WINNING.”

YOUR QUESTIONS: We’ve got a question from Cody Watson: He wants to know, if Accidents were an ice cream flavour, what would they be? Glenn: “Rocky Road. Just cause it has rock in it….. And cherries.” Marcus: I’m going to say vanilla, cause were a bit shit, and no one really wants that.” Ben: “Yeah kinda bland.” Reece Parkinson wants to know, if you could perform with any hip hop artist. Who would it be?

Eddie: “Bone thugs and harmony.” Ben: “Probably Odd Future cause they fuck everything up.” THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME GUYS. DEFINITELY GET ONLINE OR TO A SHOW AND CHECK THESE GUYS OUT! You can find the boys on Facebook by clicking the logo AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE, or e-mail them at: accidentsonline@ googlemail.com

WE MANAGED TO CATCH UP WITH SAM AND CAMERON BEFORE THEIR FIRST UK RECKLESS & RELENTLESS DATE AT THE ELECTRIC BALLROOM, IN A SMALL LITTLE ECHOY ROOM ABOVE THE VENUE AND EVEN WITH DANNY INTERUPTING HALF WAY THROUGH, WE STILL MANAGED TO GET SOME HALF SERIOUS ANSWERS OUT OF THE GUYS, BUT WHY THE

FUCK ARE YOU STILL READING THIS BIT? SEE WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY FOR THEMSELVES! FIRSTLY, CAN YOU JUST SAY WHO YOU ARE & WHAT YOU DO IN ASKING ALEXANDRIA? “Hi, I’m Sam & I play bass.” “I’m Cameron, I play guitar.” YOU’VE JUST COME OFF YOUR SECOND HEADLING TOUR, HOW WAS THAT? Sam: “It was awesome, we got to hang out with some really cool guys, Emmure, they were awesome.” Cameron: “We’ve been out with Miss May I before as well, so it was cool to hang out with those guys.” Sam: “Yeah, Evergreen as well we’ve played with those guys a few times, they’re good friends of ours. It was good because this last headlining tour was the ‘Reckless & Relentless’ tour which was the first of

Sam: “It’s not a habit but-“ Danny: “It’s just an unfortunate truth. Ben has a habit of breaking TVs. Cameron has a habit of sleeping with girls that are way too old for him.” WE HEARD A RUMOR, THAT YOU [DANNY] HAVE A GUY WHO’S SPECIFIC JOB WAS TO ID GIRLS YOU WERE TALKING TO? Danny: “[laughs] It wasn’t his specific job, he just took it upon himself, yeah” IF YOU COULD BE IN ANY OTHER BAND FOR A DAY, WHO WOULD YOU PICK? Cameron: “Motley Crue.” Sam: “Danny’s going to hate me for saying this but, Avenged for a day because Avenged Sevenfold for me – I just love that band so much, but if we’re talking like, legendary then if they were still going, then at their prime, Queen would be awesome.”

that album, so it was the first time we ever played the new songs.” WERE THERE ANY HITCHES ALONG THE WAY? Sam: “Err, nah I think in terms of like, performing and playing the songs it was pretty solid, like we knew ‘em before. I want to say we practiced them but we, didn’t really [laughs] it just worked. Err, no hitches from playing, the tour was crazy, we had loads of crazy things happening on tour.” ARE THERE ANY PARTICULAR SHOWS FROM THAT TOUR THAT STAND OUT TO YOU? Cameron: “It’s got to be South by So What for me, Dallas.” Sam: “Or Las Vagas for me, at the extreme thing fest. Cameron: “It was just like, such a sick show. I just really like big venues, the bigger the better for me. Sam: “We played South by So What

last year, so it was nice to come back and headline it. There were loads of bands and loads of our friends were on it. For me Extreme Thing fest in Vegas was awesome, I just didn’t expect it to be so massive. I literally just rocked it there with my girlfriend, I was going to come play the show & then leave & like, so much was going on, like Motorcross and Wrestling and all kind of stuff there, it was insane. We walked up in stage and I’ve never played to that many people in my life, it was insane! Helped our show as well, I like our little shows.” YOU MADE YOUR NATIONAL TV DEBUT ON THE JIMMY KIMMEL, WAS THAT A REALISATION TO JUST HOW BIG YOU’VE BECOME? Sam: “It really hit us, you know when we flew out there & saw how, the thing is, I know of Jimmy Kimmel but I didn’t really get a grasp of just how big he is. Because we’re English

it’s like, the people over there, everyone, it’s weird how everyone knew who Jimmy Kimmel was, from older people to younger people. For me, that made me feel like ‘woah, this is the next step now’ when I say ‘we just played Jimmy Kimmel’ even older people will be like ‘oh, really?’ whereas I could say ‘I play in a screamo band, yeah we did this, we did that’ & they won’t have a clue what we’re talking about. To go there & actually be behind the scenes, see how it all works y’know, Hollywood Boulevard, it was insane. I thought it was awesome.” Cam: “It was good times.”

like 18,000.” Sam: “18,000 was predicted so-“ Cameron: “So we were like if we get to 20,000 that will be cool.” Sam: “When we heard we got 31,000 & we did 16,000 in the first day we were just like… ‘shit!’”

YOU MANAGED TO DO 31,500 SALES IN THE FIRST WEEK ON THE NEW ALBUM, WAS THAT EXCEEDING EXPECTATIONS? Sam: “Exceeding, definitely way beyond my expectations. I was gunna be happy with like, 20,000.” Cameron: “We were predicted to do

[DANNY WORSNOP ENTERS]

WHAT LED TO THE GUITARS GOING DOWN TO DROP C ON THIS ALBUM AS OPPOSED TO DROP D ON THE PREVIOUS? Sam: “I honestly think that, it’s weird because a lot of people thought that even though we were just standart drop D we made that sound so heavy on the last album.”

Sam: “I just don’t think it’s that much different, if we would’ve dropped down to like B or something it would’ve been like ‘woah’, I don’t think it really changed the sound, I don’t think it made it

sound a lot more – it did sound a little bit heavier, I think it was just right for us, because we can still write the same.” Cameron: “It was like, Danny was making the melody & it would just sound better. Instead of just being shit.” SPENDING SO MUCH TIME TOGETHER, HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED ANY REALLY WEIRD HABITS THAT YOUR BAND MATES HAVE? Sam: “James is obsessed with washing his hands. He’ll wash his hands-“ Cameron: “About 60 times a day.” Sam: “He’s so weird, I’ve never really seen someone wash their hands so much.” Cameron: “Danny’s cowboy boots we have to leave outside.” Sam: “Because yeah, Danny’s feet – Danny has the worst smelling feet, ever.” Danny: “That isn’t a habit.”

WHAT IS YOUR PERSONAL FAVOURITE TRACK FROM THE NEW ALBUM? Sam: “Err, ‘Dear Insanity’ I think. I could pick a few, but ‘Dear Insanity’ for me.” Cameron: “ It’s probably ‘To The Stage’ for me, it’s fucking sick.” Danny: “Someone Somewhere.” DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR FIRST EVER GIG AS THE CURRENT AA? Sam: “Millville.” Cameron: “It was so bad.” Danny: “There are videos of it on Youtube, we managed to delete all the other ones.” Sam: “We arrived there, set up on the floor-“ Danny: “We were waiting for the people that worked there who were having a mother’s meeting.” Sam: “It was like a village hall-“ Danny: “Fucking screaming ‘WE’RE A TOURING BAND, WE’RE FROM ENGLAND, WE’RE THE SHIT, LET US IN!’” Sam: “A floor show to about 50 kids, it was cool for the time, just because we were playing in America.” Danny: “We were so stoked because we made 100$ on merch. On t-shirts that were shit.”

it, lets just go to America. We get there & everyone’s so obsessed with the UK & like English people.” Sam: “Yeah, it’s completely different over there, like an American comes over here & it’s usually like English people are just like ‘oh god, jog on’ whereas over there, it’s like, they embrace it so much. They think we all sound posh! It automatically set us aside from the 20 bands that sounded quite like us there. We were just, already singled out, before we were even signed or anything.”

“This tour was jusT baaad.” DO YOU HAVE A PARTICULAR MEMORY AS A BAND THAT STANDS OUT ABOVE EVERYTHING ELSE? Danny: “The events that are good, we don’t remember.” Cameron: “All the bad ones get remembered.” Sam: “I feel like the bad ones always stick out.” Danny: “Because when they’re bad they’re really bad.” Cameron: “This tour was just baaad.” Sam: “Danny sounds like he’s really learnt his lesson, he’s just laughing his head off.” IF ASKING ALEXANDRIA WERE AN ICE CREAM FLAVOUR WHAT WOULD THEY BE? Sam: “Oh god Danny’s going to say jizz.” Danny: [laughs] “I was just thinking it just then! Sam: “I knew it, ‘jizz’ err, cookie dough because it’s the first thing that popped into my head.” Cameron: “Jack Daniels ice cream.” Danny: “That would be amazing.” LIVING IN EACH OTHER’S POCKETS 24/7 HAVE YOU EVER WANTED TO MASH A FELLOW BAND MATES FACE INTO A BLENDER? Cameron: “Yes!” Sam: “Definitely, I mean I think we all know how to deal with things now. We’ve learnt from being on tour with each other like, Cam will

YOU’VE GOT A REALLY ENGLISH SOUND TO YOUR MUSIC, SO THEY’RE EITHER GOING TO REALLY GET YOU OR JUST THINK ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?’ Sam: “Yeah, we tried to really make sure that it didn’t get really Americanised as well, we sat there in the studio & said ‘Danny, please don’t sound America, sound how you would normally, how you always have sounded.”

walk away from situations and have time on his own when he’s really angry.” Cameron: “It won’t really be anything serious, it’ll just be something stupid and we’ll start arguing about it –“ Sam: “We’re like brothers, and then we’ll just get in a shouting contest and you’ll just really want to hit them.” Cameron: “It’s usually when we’ve been drinking which is like, all the time.” Sam: “You should’ve seen the bus from our last tour, every single bus on that door had holes in it, and we went through two plazma TVs because someone’s fist went through them. Lots of money was wasted but it was rather that than each other I guess.” HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE ASPIRING BANDS LOOKING UP TO YOU AS INFLUENCE, INSPIRATION

& MOTIVATION TO CARRY ON, CONSIDERING 2 OR 3 YEARS AGO YOU WERE PRETTY MUCH NOBODY? Danny: “We feel like it’s time to apologise to the world, for what’s about to happen.” Sam: “It’s cool, it’s awesome. There’s a few bands that have said that that are really good, & they’re doing really well.” WAS IT INTENTIONAL TO BREAK AMERICA BEFORE BREAKING ENGLAND? Sam: “Yeah I think that was the plan. We just wanted to be different, do something different. I think the bands that we were listening to do America, I know Ben just had the plan to go over there from the start.” Cameron: “Like, the shit that we play is like that sort of scene, it was just dying in the UK for us. It was like the band was just not getting anywhere & we wanted to just like do it like, full time. So we were just like, fuck

REGARDING THE SEATTLE SHOW, WE KNOW DANNY PUBLICLY ADDRESSED HIMSELF AS HAVING PROBLEMS CONTROLLING HIS SUBSTANCES & WAS ON THE MEND, WAS THAT A SIGN OF HIM FALLING BACK INTO IT OR WAS IT JUST A WEAK MOMENT? Sam: “That was a really, really weak moment. He was just like, at peak.” Cameron: “He was like, sober pretty much the whole tour, he did really good, it was all going well. Something personal happened and it just hit him, he just went off the wall-“ Sam: “He did, he flipped, and that day he was just like ‘fuck everything,

“Fuck it, we’re all going to hell, it’ll be fun.”

rawrrr’, he was just so like – seriously, he was sober the whole way up to that point, that night, and he just flipped. Something personal must’ve just flipped him. When it comes to it at the end of the day I’ll stand by Danny, but there’s some things that – we are a band and people do things bad on stage, you’ve got to think about the rest of the people. We spoke about it afterwards and, you know we’re all there for each other and Danny was going through personal stuff.” BIRMINGHAM ALABAMA, YOU BROUGHT THE CEILING DOWN, LITERALLY. WHAT HAPPENED THERE? Sam: “Yeah, we got shut off. [They didn’t get put back on so] we just left. It was our second to last song and err, we’re not allowed to go back there, we’ve been banned. We sorted it all out though, we sorted all the damages. The

venue we walked into was half ruined when we got there. We walked on stage and they were taping the ceiling up before we even got on stage, they were shouting at the other bands because parts of the ceiling were falling down-“ Cameron: “I thought we were going to get arrested.” Sam: “I shouldn’t really have happened, but the kids enjoyed it, we paid for all the damages… It was just another crazy thing that happened on that tour, not to mention the bus. There was so much destruction that tour, but looking back it’s not like we’re just wrecking things and not having to deal with it, we deal with it all. It’s funny though. £15,000 down the shitter.” HAVE YOU GOT ANY LYRICS YOURSELVES, THAT STAND OUT? Sam: “[Shows tattoos on his arms] When every day’s the weekend. It’s not a very good tattoo, I got it done a couple days after we recorded in Indiana, which is probably why it’s not very good. That’s just because we literally all left everything we were doing in England, I was working full time in Phones 4 U, we were all doing our own things [directs to Cameron] you were working in Morissons. [laughs] We all did our own little things, we all went to college, we all literally decided to go and do this thing and now we’re literally living like every day’s the weekend, it’s just this every day, we’re always going to remember it, forever.”

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT YOUR FANS GETTING ASKING ALEXANDRIA INSPIRED TATTOOS? Sam: “I don’t know actually, because to that person when they get it done, it depends what they really get it done for but it depends what the lyrics mean to them, some people have come to see me & said it’s helped them through some really hard times.” Cameron: “I guess if it’s lyrics it’s okay.” Sam: “Even if the band does fade away, and we don’t exist anymore, they’ll always look at those lyrics and remember how it made them feel, they’ll listen to the song and they’ll remember how it helped them get through it. I feel when I see that, I think that’s cool. Even if it’s the logo that helps them, or even if they’re just massive fans, then it’s cool. It’s kinda weird when you see people getting like, our signatures tattooed on them and stuff, that

kinda freaks me out a little bit. It’s awesome but it’s like, a little bit strange. Like some guy got me to sign there [indicates the bottom area of his forearm, opposite his wrist] and then came to the show in Texas, straight tattoo and I was like, that’s going to be there forever, like, wow. Meaningful tattoos, they’re cool. If it’s to do with our lyrics, that’s cool.”

so much bigger.” Cameron: “It’s just different sorts, it’s not like, so techno.” Sam: “Yeah, it’s not so clappy, jumpy.” Cameron: “They’ve just taken it up mid-market.” Sam: “It’s crucial to make it sound really big and epic and, I think, we’ve changed as well since Stand Up & Scream.”

HAVE YOU GOT ANYTHING SET FOR YOUR NEXT VIDEO? Sam: “We’ve got a few plans, nothing set in stone yet. We’ve got a few ideas [regarding songs] but I’m not sure if we can say yet, I know we’ve got a handful of ones we want to do. We definitely want the video to be different from the last two.” Cameron: “It’s not going to be like a typical performance, there’s going to be more of a story to it.” Sam: “[Regarding the ‘Final Episode & ‘Prophecy’] personally, I felt like it was the same video, with rain.”

DO YOU THINK IT WILL PLAY A BIG PART IN FUTURE ALBUMS? Sam: “Err, yeah. We can’t cut it out completely, it is us to a certain extent, but maybe eventually if that’s what we decide to do, get rid of it but right now – I love what we’re doing right now.” Sam: “Yeah definitely. Like, we literally had no time to write that album at all. We had like a month to write Stand Up & Scream, we got signed so it was like ‘you’re going to be in the studio at this time’ & we were like ‘shit, we’ve got a month’ we spent just short of a year writing Reckless & Relentless.” Cameron: “We took like, two months off as well-“ Sam: “Yeah, & it was after we’d been touring that we really got to know each other & what we really wanted to do. We were such a baby then, we had three demos, each with three songs.”

HAVE YOU EVEN BEGUN TO WRITE TOWARDS ANY FUTURE TRACKS YET OR IS IT TOO EARLY FOR THAT? Sam: “I think - we’re always writing, I mean like, bits and pieces on the road and they just evolve into something. When you’re touring you’re constantly – it’s really hard to sit down with everyone and write a song so it’s like, Ben will sit down and he’ll write, if he’s got some cool riff or chords he’ll record that section and we’ll just add to it. We’re always recording stuff and thinking of stuff even when we’re just jamming on stage for sound check, Ben’s doing it all the time.” WAS IT A CONSCIOUS DECISION TO USE LESS TRANCE-STYLE SOUNDS IN RECKLESS & RELENTLESS COMPARED TO IT BEING ON PRACTICALLY EVERY TRACK OF STAND UP & SCREAM? Sam: “I just feel like if you listen to the songs there’s not synth breaks. We wanted to keep the synth, but we just wanted to make the songs sound bigger, we wanted the synth imbedded in there not as just a break. Listen to it, there’s synth all the way through the songs, it’s just in the background, it makes it sound

NOTHING LASTS FOREVER, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO AFTER ASKING ALEXANDRIA? Cameron: “Sit at home & drink all day. Danny: “I’ll be dead. I’ll be dead before it ends, we’re going to die young. Fuck it, we’re all going to hell, it’ll be fun!” WE WOULD LOVE TO THANK THE GUYS FOR THEIR TIME. MAKE SURE IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY, THAT YOU GET ONLINE OR GET ONLINE OR PICK UP A COPY OF THE NEW ALBUM ‘RECKLESS & RELENTLESS’ & CHECK IT OUT!

electric ballroom 22/04/2011

while she sleeps

OF MICE AND MEN

You could tell the crowd tonight were up for an energetic one as the opening band played to a pretty much full house, with the fans getting involved from the offset. The band didn’t hold back either, storming through their set with an energy and power that caught me by surprise. The riff laden songs, intermingled with tastefully used breakdowns and impressive guitar interplay kept the crowd involved right up to the last note. A wall of death

during the last song felt a little forced in for the sake of it, but the crowd loved every second, embracing the opportunity to get moving. The frontman managed to keep a good consistency to his vocals through the set, even when crowd surfing, although his projection began to show signs of tiredness toward the end of the set. All in all, While She Sleeps looked very comfortable in front of a big crowd and I expect to see more of them very soon.

The crowd tonight proved to be up to the challenge of the bands but jumping headfirst into action within moments of OM&M taking the stage. Vocalist Austin Carlile was clearly excited, informing us all this was the furthest he had ever travelled from home, whilst bounding around the stage and even climbing the light rigging. They played through their well rehearsed set with the presence of a giant whilst getting the crowd involved and throwing in some showmanship for good measure, with Carlile’s vocals going from strength to strength throughout the set, despite a minor setback when his Mic stopped

working mid song. They took the technical hiccup in stride and carried on giving their fans what they wanted, working their way up to a big finish. And as they broke into Second & Sebring the crowd let them know they had delivered. Bassist Shayley Bourget’s clean vocals never skipped a beat, despite his insistence he was losing his voice, and had the crowd singing along with him the whole way, even taking over at one point when the whole band stopped dead, before kicking back in to the finale of the track. They left the stage to a thundering ovation after making their mark, leaving only one thing left to do.

As the first note of intro track “Welcome” rang over the PA, the crowd erupted bigger and louder than I ever thought they could, and kept the noise up as each member made their way onto the stage one by one, and as the track dropped the place went nuts. Unfortunately, some technical difficulties led to a good ten minute wait before they could continue, however frontman Danny Worsnop relished the opportunity to get some banter time with the crowd, even leading them in a “call and response” accapella rendition of Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’. After the short distraction the sampled intro of “Closure” began to thunder through the venue to a massive cheer. At the kick in the crowd outdid their previous efforts and began moving and roaring immediately, leaving no doubt that this is who they came to see. Worsnop laps up the energy and sends it straight back at them, powering through the track, nailing cleans and screams alike, dueting with the crowd. Guitarist Ben Bruce and Cameron Liddell switch sides of the stage so often it’s hard to follow, dodging around the energetic fireball that is bassist Sam Bettley, yet they still operate as a unit, giving a stage show, yet still nailing every note. They plow through tracks from new album “Reckless and Relentless” intermingled with classics from “Stand Up And Scream”, delivering crowd pleaser after crowd pleaser, and getting the crowd involved at every possible opportunity. The crowd didn’t need to be asked, screaming every line right back at the band, delivering two walls of death AND a circle pit in one song alone, determined to show the adopted American band where the REAL crowds are. They left

the stage after playing album closer Morte Et Dabo, only to return to blast out the classic Final Episode, complete with intro track Alerion. The swells of people knew this was their last chance and really went for it, and the band bounced off this energy, upping their game and giving as good as they got, bringing the night to a close with a bang, and leaving the crowd with everything they wanted. These boys know how to put on a show, and I don’t see their rapid rise stopping any time soon.

asking alexandria

well attempted cover of Slayer’s ‘Raining Blood’, Kretos are definitely a band to look out for on the local scene. A little different from what you usually find in our current scene from a group of guys of this age, Kretos put a more ‘classic rock’ sound across. With a ‘Metallica’ feel and more melodic sounding solos, the boys get the crowd head banging in sync and kids throwing each other left right and center, which is always entertaining finishing with a

Within Silence opened with a cover of A Day To Remember’s ‘Mr Highway’s Thinking

About The End’ which sounded like a good try from where I was standing, but was later informed by a member of the audience that the vocalist had forgotten some of the lyrics. Moving on from that they laid down some catchy beats which the crowd welcomed with swinging arms and legs, including a guy in a gorilla outfit? They went on to do a cover of Blind Witness’ “Baby One More Notch”

In Ruins start with heavily treble laden pre-recordings and bass boom their way onto the stage, sync head banging and stomping their way through the set. A passion-filled frontman Kane, delivers powerful rough vocals that mix well with a range of

clean vocals produced by both guitarists. The crowd reaction seems to pick up at the line “that ship has sailed”, and they go on two stepping their way to a momentary break met by a nice twinkly guitar section and swaying lighters and phones to bring you back to a wall o’ death for their last song; ‘Faces’. George Ward steps in for guest vocals, enabling an amazing vocal range

Accidents took to the stage with two vocalists, something that made them stand out against the rest of the bands that night. With a mix of clean vocals as well as shouts and well-met high screeches, compact beats and easily likeable riffs, the boys give off an up-beat, energetic vibe that soon gets the crowd involved and moving about. They get round to ‘Beginning’ which is the first song the boys ever wrote together; with sped up tempo and riffs changes and beatdowns in all the right places it’s hard to decide whether some of the tunes are predictable or just really well thought out? Accidents really are a crowd pleaser: with the likes of ‘Dave Facking South’ providing guest vocals on

‘Alive’, then on to ‘Noah’s Shark’ with Marcus dedicating the song to his cousin, stating that he’s “under the thumb”, they go stamping and shouting their way through, ‘Cody Watson’ getting a little yelp in towards the end, the boys really do make the effort to connect well with their crowd, and it shows! They finish with the rather catchy, ‘Burial’, which went out to Sophie Ives, it just confused me as to why the crowd left the circle pit until the last 30 seconds of the last song?

Avenge Thee + Naime start with their trademark setup in the middle of the floor, which a fuck tonne of kids pitting around them from the word go. The doubled up drummers was something that I have personally never witnessed before, but was certainly distracting from the rest of the set up. However, I couldn’t help but think that this amazing idea was slightly wasted with the fact that the boys seemed to mirror each other’s actions the entire time. If they were to play complimentary c r o s s

rhythms then they would have the potential to blow minds! Looking at the audience, it’s sometimes a little hard to tell whether they’re genuinely listening, almost in awe, or whether they’re slightly confused; yet they go on cartwheeling and windmilling their way through and (literally) around their songs. It is made clearly obvious that AT+N are a definite crowd pleaser. Saying that, 102 repetitive ‘”jazz’s” later and slowing down to what can only be described as ‘stoner rock’, the boys make an interesting impact first off but are definitely not for those with a short attention span… Tim’s a paedo.

Words by: Zoe Blush Photography by Vicky Webb

is back

over all. You cannot watch this band and not pick up the Architects vibe they put across. I would definitely personally advise you get your arse to a show and see these boys live, definitely not to be missed.

Faith’n’Fury

If there’s one thing you can guarantee every time Faith’N’Fury are on the bill it’s entertainment, and their opening performance at Nambucca at the beginning of April was no exception. At the guest-list only event there were a total of 4 acts playing; with the local boys kicking off the night. The party had already started as the band had organised transport and entry; allowing the Faith’N’Fury fans to hit London in a vintage double decker bus. Always a good start! A downside to the event organisation though was that it wasn’t very clear as to when any of the acts were starting. This meant many missing the beginning of sets and in some cases the whole set altogether. This was mainly due to the stage being in a separate room to the main bar with the door generally kept shut. Despite that minor set back the audience was not disappointed. Faith’N’Fury front man Steve Leonard was on good form

with clear, clean vocals. Backed by bass guitarist Pace, the pair encouraged everyone to sing and dance along; even leaving the stage and getting in close with the crowd. On drums Rich Bladon gave an energetic and high paced performance only confirming that he definitely is one of the most underrated drummers around.

Faith’N’Fury were playing. The local fans had set up camp in front of the stage with the rest of crowd showing keen interest and support. There were a few technical problems through the set but nothing that really disrupted or hindered the performance. Just minor sound and equipment issues but all were dealt with quickly and smoothly.

In mid April the boys were once again hitting up London and played at the 100 Club in Oxford Street. There seemed to be a good turnout from the home fans, it was good to see some local support. The night had already attracted a large crowd as there were 3 other bands playing also. Compared to Nambucca, the 100 Club is very much a more performance friendly venue. All based in one large main room with a bar at both ends, seating or standing options and the stage in the middle. So no matter where are you can always see and hear what’s going on giving bands maximum exposure.

The set was once again full of energy and enthusiasm, clearly displaying just how much these guys love what they do. All their songs are high paced and encourage the crowd to get involved and sing or dance along. This element of the Faith’N’Fury show is what really makes them stand out, always leaving you with the satisfaction that you’ve been entertained.

And this was clearly evident when Words and images by Emma Duggan

The passion this 3 piece have is clear in their performance and when accompanied with their catchy signature tunes it is easy for even new members of the audience to get involved, really making them stand out. Altogether

Let me just paint you a picture... So you walk through a ruined street and come across a retro nightclub all destroyed and ruined. You enter and come across a table with a couple of bottles of booze on it, you drink both the bottles. Your vision starts to blur and the jukebox kicks in playing The Trammps’ Disco Inferno. Out of nowhere a brute with a gatling gun comes round the corner with two grunts. Seeing double vision due to the booze you kick one of the grunts into a bunch of dangling wires and he burns up. The second grunt you shoot in the

head and it explodes. You then fire on the brute until he falls down for a second whilst quickly running behind him, you kick him in the ass then shoot him in it as the words “REAR ENTRY” pop up on screen killing him dead. This is basically the theme of the game, its full of these crazy moments throughout that make you either laugh out loud in a fit of hysterics or stare in awe at what’s happening in front of you, hardly able to believe your eyes. Now I’m not here to review the game because as you can already tell I fucking love it, I’m here to show my appreciation for games that are just plain bad ass!

There are few games in my head that I call bad ass. The ability to bring that grit and aggression into the gameplay without making the game feel like shit. God of War is another one, the way you run through levels fucking women and ripping off heads! The other example that comes to mind is Gears of War, just having the ability to chainsaw your enemies into two pieces is stupidly satisfying.

fu ck you up?

“ the press

There are few games that really have the brutal factor now days but Bulletstorm just hits the mark for me. You already know that I think its amazing but for the sake of it, GO BUY THIS GAME!

Its back and its bigger, better and gorier than ever. If your a fan of the series then you wont be disappointed. Its Mortal Kombat but this time round the moves are better, the combat is faster, there are a whole load of characters to pick from. Yes the story is crap and the cut scenes are cheesy as hell but god is it entertaining. The game sounds amazing, from the awesome music to the amazingly over the top voice acting. The combat system is complex enough yet still keeping it nice and user friendly, just how we like it! With the addition of Kratos from the God of War series and tons of costumes and extras to unlock, If it is taken well by the gamers this will truly be a game that you wouldn't dare mess with!

So here we have yet another sequel and this time its Crysis 2. Now I have to say it doesn’t seem to pack the punch of the first one but don’t get me wrong, its still a bloody good game. Now in comparison to the first game visually it does present a slight disappointment. But don’t let its dumbed down visuals hold it back its still a great unique game that has a whole load of new combat features that keep it feeling fresh and original. Obviously every game has its downsides and with this one its a few issues with some A.I and multilayer flaws that just bring it back from being the future perfect game it set out to be. All in all its a powerful attempt in the world of the FPS but it just doesn’t quite hold its own against the giants of C.O.D and H.A.L.O.

So the first Portal was such a huge success due to unique gameplay and awesome story that unravelled throughout. Portal 2 makes the first game look like a demonstration of the gameplay. It takes everything that the first one has and evolves on it. With the much larger environments and more technical gameplay to some of the best voice acting i've heard in a video game. No doubt helped by the likes of J.K. Simmons adding his voice to the cast. Its puzzles are challenging but without being ridiculously un-completable. Once you have completed the story mode you then have one of the most rewarding co-op experiences you will ever play. This truly is one amazing package that gets my seal of approval.

just need to shut the fuck up

“

So here it is, my featured game and this issue I’m going for Bulletstorm. Why? Because its fucking brutal!

Words by Pete Willson

GAMES its raining bullets!

will the

Visuals 9/10 audio

9/10

Gameplay 9/10 Life

8.5/10

OVERALL 9/10

Visuals 8/10 audio 7.5/10 Gameplay 8.5/10 Life

7/10

OVERALL 8/10

Visuals 9/10 audio 9.5/10 Gameplay 9.5/10 Life

9/10

OVERALL 9.5/10

Now I know that this article is not going to cause masses if interest for you all but its something that as gamers we should all be paying attention to. The reason being that it is instances like this one that are destroying the gaming industry and I hope that if this situation directly affects you this will set you up with all the information you need. Lastly if halfway through this article you get bored and cant be bothered to read any further then go fuck yourself nicely. So the 3ds has been a large source of controversy in the press recently. There is a fair bit of truth to this. I hope that I will be able to explain as to how it truly is the bull shit that these things turn out to be. The two main points are that the 3DS is putting people in hospital and that companies aren’t giving refunds to people affected. So lets look at the health risk side of things, yes it has been all over the news recently but then so was swine flu, and swine flu actually killed. So think about this, swine flu was a big deal yes, in some cases it was quite serious, but how many people do you actually know that contracted it? If the answer is more or less none then the chances are that that number of people that you know who are affected by the 3DS are

less. Without sounding too melodramatic at least swine flu killed, all the 3DS has done is caused a few headaches. Now the 3DS has caused bigger problems such as epileptic fits but then I’ve known instances where the Xbox 360 has done the same thing, its just another console. Basically what I’m getting at is that the press really needs to just shut the f**k up about the situation because truthfully they know nothing. Just to touch on an example The Sun newspaper has been largely responsible for a lot of controversy. Just to pull a comment out of the bag on Tuesday the 5th of April in an article they had this to say, “The 3DS flashes separate images into each eye, creating the illusion of depth. Nintendo last week announced that the console is not safe for under 7s and advised not playing in 3D mode for less than 30 minutes.” this is just an example of their lies, Nintendo have only ever said its not safe for under 6s and even though the 30min bit is true they have

always said this, its says it when you turn on the fucking console. As for it “flashing images”, it doesn’t. HMV were also pissed off with the sun when in the same article they said “HMV is refunding fully, but only until Thursday.”. HMV have never offered refunds... While we are on the refund subject the retailers hold no responsibility to refund the product. Its the same as buying a sandwich, taking a bite, having an allergic reaction and going back to where you bought it and asking for a refund. They would laugh in your face. If you then think that its too much of a risk buying a £200 3DS then don’t buy a fucking 3DS. Now I know I’ve rambled on for a while now but its an important issue as far as gaming concerned, so the moral is, don’t believe what you read in the papers!

Why you shouldn’t drink and take amphetamines together in abundance when you have a mood disorder and you can’t be bothered to think of a succinct title. I had an epiphany earlier… I realised that my life probably isn’t going so well if I start inviting random crack heads off the street home just because I’ve run out of company and I’m off my face on Speed. To be honest, that sounds like I’m talking in a derogative manner about crack heads. I don’t think they’re all dickheads, or losers, or scumbags like some people do. If I meet a crack head I’ll always bear in mind that drugs are mind altering things, and if they do turn out to be dickheads, they might not have always been like that. But none the less, it’s somewhat dangerous to talk to strangers, so say mothers. So inviting them back to your home and offering them alcohol is probably worse… that’s my conjecture. They were clearly troubled people, but nice enough. Anyway, the previous night I’d started off with good old legal drugs in the form of wine, beer, and vodka. Then I invited all these people back to mine and we had a pretty good night I think. A few of us had been snorting speed supplied by a very generous and lovely girl, and the upside (from what I can remember) was that I had some really good conversations and felt comfortable in a way I rarely do around anyone. It is a shame that it takes a poison to make me this way, but that’s just the way it is really, brains are quite arbitrary and I definitely lost out on some of the social skill quarks when the cosmic soup was being mixed. Speed keeps you awake and feeling energetic for ages. You feel like you have to be with people, it’s a people drug, it’s a talk for ages about everything and nothing drug. Here’s the downside if you’re

anything like me. I’m currently writing this at the end of the worst comedown I have ever had in my life. I think that it’s possibly a mixture of a speed comedown and alcohol withdrawal. To be honest I’m over the worst of it by far, and would have been unable to write earlier without getting stuck in paradoxical cycles of language that feel like someone’s scraping their finger nails down the black board in my skull. It always feels like it will never end. Earlier I was shaking violently, throwing up repeatedly, despairing at the disgusting hopeless, pointless feeling that had imprisoned my brain in consciousness. You can’t sleep. It’s the one thing that will really help, and it’s the most impossible thing to achieve. Of course different drugs affect different people differently, our brains are like an eclectic range of shades of paint, and when we mix in some other colours the outcome is different depending on our original colour. I wish that I could make people feel like I did, just for 20 seconds, just because I’ve always wondered if other people feel as bad as I do, it’s a debilitating dysphoric hell. Actually, I don’t think I’m enough of a sadist to wish that feeling upon anyone, even for 20 seconds. I cannot begin to describe how torturous it is. I would rather have my arm broken (I mean this) and have that sharp seething pain than feel the unbelievable lows of this experience, the visual and audio hallucinations and the mental and physical omnipresent pain, it’s shocking. After the others had gotten the train home, it suddenly dawned upon me that I was a loner on speed. This is where I made the spontaneous decision to ask two random people if they wanted to come to mine and get drunk. I had picked exactly the right kind of people, and, they thought this was an excellent idea. I bought them a £20 pizza from dominos and ridiculous amounts of drink. I got to know them a little better and found out that one (a woman in her 30s) was an ex heroin addict who very much liked to smoke crack nowadays, and the other (a man in his 50s) was an alcoholic with a criminal record (broke some guys legs) that is the antithesis of a C.V unless you’re applying for a job with the mafia. I nearly bought some cocaine with the woman but luckily I couldn’t find my card; I have a funny feeling it might have killed me

considering my alcohol intake by this point, which was verging on blood transplant. The power nap turned out to be a bad idea because when I woke up she was gone, and so was about £20 plus random change of what I had left out on the table. I don’t blame her to be honest, she had told me some stories of a pretty traumatic childhood and life in general, and crack habits are expensive. Also the way I was going around buying them stuff was kind of like I was on a Hunter S Thompson version of the secret millionaire, it may have seemed like I had money to spare, however, all of my money is now gone and I managed to spend, lose,… or wealth distribute over £250 over Friday night and Saturday daytime. I am assuming most of this was on alcohol, pizza; Internet top ups, and crack for that poor lady. I really hope she spends it on food or something, but popes never fly. Don’t they use planes though? The guy (who had passed out) told me he was going to get my money back off of her when he sees her, but pope and pig clichés spring to mind once more, and I genuinely don’t mind. If those people had been lucky enough to have a good childhood, or lucky enough to have “normal” brain functioning in the first place they wouldn’t be in a position where they need to steal and struggle to exist without the relief of terribly addictive and devastating drugs. So I feel like it’s more a case of them trying to take what they never had… fairness, trying their best to get round the poor hand that life has dealt them. Anyway my word count is sighing at me. I have to wrap it up… in short: don’t take speed with excessive amounts of alcohol, (both drugs are dangerous) and don’t take it at all if you don’t want to risk your health (obvious), your mental stability (especially if you have a mood disorder), or having a fucking terrible comedown that makes you realise that existence really can be far more terrifyingly excruciating than you imagined. You’ll always have people like me who can do it for you.