IWA Middlesex Branch, Middlesex Matters, Summer 2013

Middlesex Branch Newsletter email: middlesex.newsletter@waterways.org.uk

No. 31 Summer 2013

Cavalcade 30th Anniversary The Cavalcade opening ceremony; Councillor Angela Harvey, Lord Mayor of the City of Westminster is flanked by Libby Bradshaw, Events Manager and Les Etheridge, National Chairman of the IWA, with Jon Guest, Waterway Manager Canal & River Trust (London) on the left.

Photo: Ray Gill

Inland Waterways Association Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Diary Dates 2013 & social evenings 11th June Branch social evening Talk by Loraine Granger from the Hillingdon Narrowboats Association on the work of the association.

5-7th July Riverside at Ware Ware Boat Festival.

10th September Branch social evening Talk by Jon Willis on - Crofton beam engines.

14 - 15th September London riverside.

The Mayor’s Riverside Festival spectacular weekend.

19-21st July Cassiobury Park Watford IWA National Festival.

8th October Branch social evening Talk by Richard Thomas on Waterways Wonders.

1st September Canalside, Angel Islington Angel Canal Festival.

12th November Branch social evening Talk by Tony Brooks on Boat Wintering.

7 - 8th September Bloom Pk, Slough Slough Canal Festival.

Middlesex Branch social evenings are held at Hillingdon Canal Club, Waterloo Rd, Uxbridge.

Social meetings are not held in July, August or December.

For more information contact the Social Secretary Lucy Smith on, middlesex.socials@waterways.org.uk or 07947 451376.

Entrance is free and all are welcome including non members.

Organised by Slough Borough Council two days of fun for all the family

Slough Canal Festival 7 - 8th September 2013 Bloom Park, Middlegreen Road, Langley Entrance to the festival and parking is free gates are open from 11am to 5pm on both days.

Inland Waterways Association 2 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Chairman’s Column In January this year I was looking forward to the fact that the Slough Arm of the Grand Union canal was to be dredged, or at least spot dredged for the first time in ages. My plan was, following the completion of this work, to promote the Slough canal and the Slough Canal Festival in order, hopefully to get boaters to cruise the arm.

How things have changed! In February we discovered that the Slough arm was not to be dredged, as resources have to be allocated to more urgent work such as the Ridgeway Trading Estate; where the Canal & River Trust has to secure the collapsing embankment.

More bad news was to follow as in late April the C&RT announced the closure of the slough arm at Reeds Bridge (bridge 2A) as they had to carry out very urgent work to the supporting walls. At the time of writing the canal still remains closed.

In their press release of 2nd May 2013, the Canal & River Trust stated “Fixing it will not be cheap and as a charity we don’t have an endless pot of money.....”

This is true and the Trust will have to budget its limited resources to achieve the best it can in terms of keeping the network open. In the press release Jon Guest was also quoted as saying “Thankfully, considering the age of our canals, problems like this are extremely rare”. This is also true but as the network ages are we to see an increase in such problems?

The Slough canal was built in 1882 so is only about 130 years old and although not all the structures are this old, many of the main road bridges have for instance been re built, there must be many structures approaching the end of their useful life.

I can only assume that the CR&T have inspected the other bridges, aqueducts and embankments to see if there are any other problems to resolve.

One worry is that some back office accountant at C&RT will start questioning if they should spend so much money on maintaining what may be seen by some as an “underused dead end canal”.

The IWA has to tread a careful course in not being unreasonable in expecting what the C&RT can achieve with its limited resources. Our aim should be to keep all parts of the canal network open for all users, including boaters.

It is important that we keep track of the work and ensure that the canal opens as soon as possible. However we have to do more to promote use of this arm and therefore this is why we will be asking all our members with boats to attempt to visit the Slough Canal Festival this year.

We have to show the Canal & River Trust that we do care, that we will fight and that we do use all parts of the canal network.

If we do nothing then who can blame the Canal & River Trust if they decide that one way of matching budget to expenditure is to allow underused parts of the system to fade out of existence.

Keith Clayton Chairman – IWA Middlesex Branch

Inland Waterways Association 3 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Slough Arm Closed The Slough Arm of the Grand Union Canal has had to be closed due to a serious structural fault with bridge 2a. This is a footbridge known as Reeds bridge a short distance from the M25. It is in imminent danger of collapse resulting in the towpath and bridge being closed at this point.

One of the brick-built sections that support Reeds Bridge moved and cracked, resulting in the entire abutment, the towpath and the waterway wall sinking by 1m and sliding into the canal.

The Slough Arm and towpath at Reeds Bridge is currently closed while the Canal & River Trust carries out emergency works. They hope to complete the emergency works by the end of June 2013.

The emergency works are already underway and include: the diversion of electricity and communications cables (including an 11,000V high voltage electric cable), temporarily filling the canal with stone to prevent further movement and provide a safe platform for workers, the removal of the main body of the bridge, demolition of the towpath side abutment, removal of the waterway wall and towpath; and finally building a temporary towpath and reopening the navigation. Once these initial emergency works have been carried out the Trust will investigate a permanent solution for the replacement of the bridge.

Aylesbury Arm Closed On Thursday 28 March 2013 C&RT announced the closure of the Aylesbury Arm from lock 11 to lock 13.

The closure was due to a collapse of the lock wall on the towpath side at Lock 12 which has resulted in the lock chamber being unstable and unsafe for navigation.

Work is expected to start in July and the section will remain closed until further notice The towpath is also closed.

Enquiries: 0303 0404040 Inland Waterways Association 4 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Congratulations - 25 years of the ACS Twenty-five years ago the Australian Canal Society came into being. To celebrate the anniversary 58 members enjoyed a lunch at Oatlands Golf Club, in the centre of Sydney.

ACS members at the 25th anniversary One of the ACS members, Julie Nugent, is a descendant of the canal engineer James Brindley and she gave a talk about her famous forebear and his connection with Australia.

Middlesex Branch Sales Stand events 2013 Robin will be out and about with the branch sales stand visiting some of the festivals etc in and around the Middlesex area.

5 - 7 July

Ware Boat Festival - River Lea

19 – 21 July

IWA National Festival, Cassiobury Pk, Watford.

7 - 8 September

Slough Canal Festival - Bloom Park

21 September

Hanwell Locks - Open House weekend

If you’re at one of these events and you see the sales stand why not introduce yourself to Robin and have a chat or even spend some time helping, you’ll be most welcome.

Middlesex Branch donations The Branch recently made a donation of £200 to the Cotswold Canal Trust Bowbridge Appeal and received a letter of thanks from Justine Hopkins of the CCT administration team. http://www.cotswoldcanals.com The Committee are always willing to consider donating to any waterways related cause. So if you know any group that might benefit, let us know and we’ll see what we can do.

Inland Waterways Association 5 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

IWA’s 2013 National Festival set for Watford.

19 - 21 July at Cassiobury Park The IWA 2013 National Festival is to be held at Cassiobury Park on the Grand Union Canal in Watford over the weekend of 1921st July. IWA intends that this will form part of an IWA Summer Festival of London Waterways.

Hopefully, the cold weather earlier in the year will have given way to warm summer sunshine.

Cassiobury Park is a very popular town centre park which slopes down to the River Gade and Grand Union Canal.

Opening times: Friday & Saturday 10-6pm, Sunday 10-5pm

Getting there: Watford Metropolitan Line

Underground station is about 5 minutes walk.

Gade Avenue car park will not be available, so car parking around the area will be extremely limited.

Better to use public transport wherever possible.

Activities: In the showground, the inland marine

trade will be showcasing new and used boats for sale and all the accessories needed.

There will also be a wide range of general interest stalls, probably the best varieties of food we’ve ever offered, a real ale bar, snacks and food stalls, and the IWA shop for an extensive choice of waterways books and gifts. A craft marquee will provide an opportunity for you to acquire traditional waterway craft skills in our workshops.

There will be a wide range of entertainments on site including a fly past by a World War II Spitfire (circumstances permitting), song and dance throughout the festival, a Victorian Fairground and lots of attractions for children and adults alike.

Ticket Prices: Advance ticket prices Single adult - £6.50 3 day pass - £12.50 Book tickets online

Gate ticket prices Single adult - £9.00 (children under 16 are free) Concessions - £8.00 2 or 3 day pass - £15.00 Late Entry (after 4pm) - £6.00

Inland Waterways Association 6 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Waterway staff to change working practices The bank staff at the Canal & River Trust have voted in favour of new flexible working hours. The introduction of ‘annualised hours’ was supported by 88% of union members.

This will result in customer services teams working longer hours in the summer, when the waterways are busiest, and construction teams working longer in the winter, when the majority of repairs are carried out. Unison’s Jane Ellis and Phil Allman from Unite, jointly commented that the trade unions recognise that both parties have moved barriers to

allow the workforce to achieve a yes vote on this ground breaking agreement, and especially supported by senior officials from both the trade unions and the Trust.

The changes, which came into effect from May 2013, will see Trust staff working hours that suit the operational needs of their area, rather than a standard, Monday to Friday, 37 hour week. This will mean that an individual’s 1,931 working hours will be distributed across the year as needed.

Kensal Town towpath improvements Towpath improvements in the Kensal Town area of the Grand Union are now well under way between Great Western Road and Gasworks Dock, near Sainsbury’s at Kensal Rise.

A wide range of towpath improvements including signage, speed bumps, chicanes, better surfacing, widening and more subtle design features to improve the overall appearance for users and visitors.

On the Regent’s Canal where peak time congestion is especially high the Canal & River Tust employs Rosie Tharp as strategic cycle routes coordinator. She is responsible for the Alternative Routes project, which is working for a better deal for cyclists on roads whilst lessening the burden on the towpath.

New Thames crossing nears completion The new road bridge at Walton on Thames is on target to become operational during the summer. The £32m bridge linking Walton-on-Thames and Shepperton will replace the two existing temporary bridges in use since 1953 and 1999.

The road surface is almost ready for use; the next step is to realign the approach roads to bring the bridge into use. This is on course to begin in July. Demolition of the old bridges can start once the new bridge is operational and is expected to start in August followed by final landscaping works.

Completion of bridge removal is expected to be during December and all construction works finished by March 2014.

Inland Waterways Association 7 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Canalway Cavalcade – Little Venice 2013

Round the chimney, step in time, Round the chimney, step in time, Never need a reason, Never need a rhyme, Round the chimney, step in time. (from Mary Poppins)

Inland Waterways Association 8 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Above: Chairman Keith and Plan/Nav Mike Phillips are kept busy on the IWA sales stand.

The sun and spectacle attracted the biggest crowd ever for the IWA's 30th annual Cavalcade with over 30,000 visitors to London's Little Venice during the May-Day Bank Holiday weekend.

Below: Polishing the brasses, a traditional folk scene at the Cavalcade.

Inland Waterways Association 9 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Blood found at scene of boat break-in A man who lived on a boat on the Grand Union near Cassiobury Park and broke into two of his neighbours boats was sentenced in January at St Albans Crown Court.

He broke into the boats leaving blood at the scene which was DNA tested leading to his arrest. Kit Green, whose address was given as Bridge-water Basin, Cassio Bridge,

Watford, pleaded guilty to two offences of burglary and was sentenced to a 12 month community order with six months supervision.

He was also fined £50 for possession of cannabis and ordered to pay £2,500 to the owners of the boats he burgled and prosecution costs of £350.

Canal rage Boat owners living on Regent’s Canal are being confronted by residents over noise and pollution.

Homeowners are reported to have marched to the edge of the waterway in Angel, Islington, to complain about smoke from boat engines pouring into their kitchens, bedrooms and gardens.

Six or seven narrowboats are allowed temporary moorings opposite the homes, but

currently up to 20 are moored, often three deep, residents say.

Councillor Martin Klute said: “This isn’t a case of snobby residents complaining, they have always welcomed the boats but in the last two years there’s been a huge increase.”

The Canal and River Trust, which maintains the waterway, said: “We urge boat users and residents to work together. Signs forbid use of smoky fuels and remind boaters not to run engines between 8pm and 8am.”

The Mayor’s Thames Festival The Mayor's Thames Festival weekend from 14 – 15th Sept 2013 is one of the biggest and best free outdoor arts festivals celebrating London and its river. It sees the riverside from Westminster to the Tower transformed with market stalls, street entertainers and more; a great day out.

The night carnival on Sunday evening is a grand finale to the festival. Thousands of people join in the illuminated procession as the lanterns, costumes and floats make their way along Victoria Embankment.

The evening culminates in a spectacular fireworks display over the river Thames

Mid summer jazz cruise Friday 14 June - Chiswick Pier Trust offer Chiswick Pier Trust will be holding a jazz cruise on Friday 14th June aboard the Queen Elizabeth. Cruising to Westminster and back leaving Chiswick Pier at 7.00 pm, returning around 10.00pm.

restaurant will be serving a two course cold supper will be served during the cruise.

Tickets are on sale £35.00 per head.

Call 020 8742 2713 or 07594 596729.

Music on board will be from the jazz band Anacousis and Pissarro’s Inland Waterways Association 10 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

Major developments at Brentford Planning and Navigation

By Ray Gill The character of the Grand Union in Brentford is set to change dramatically as three major schemes are about to be implemented.

Brentford Lock West Construction has already started on the first phase of Brentford Lock West, a development located between Commerce Road and the Grand Union Canal. The northern boundary of the site is the railway between Brentford Station and Syon Lane Station.

The site also includes the overhanging sheds which were used for storage of lime juice, barrels of which were unloaded from Thames lighters prior to transportation to Rose’s factory near Hemel Hempstead.

The developer for the scheme is ISIS Waterside Regeneration, a joint venture between the Canal & River Trust (formerly British Waterways) and Muse Developments.

The entire development is likely to consist of some 500 dwelling units. The developers have indicated a five to seven year programme for the overall implementation of the scheme.

The first phase of 150 housing units in the southern half of the site will benefit from a range of measures to use sustainable energy, including district heating, green roofs, roof top allotments and PV panels. In addition, improvements will be made to the towpath to increase the width to approximately 6.5 metres.

We have expressed our support for the first phase of the development but the details of the northern half of the site are still to emerge and will require our further consideration. This second phase will include proposals for the overhanging sheds and a new footbridge over the canal.

Links: http://www.brentfordlockwest.co.uk http://www.isisregeneration.co.uk

Brentford Waterside Adjacent to the semi tidal stretch of the canal and River Brent above Thames Lock Ballymore Properties are progressing proposals for a large mixed development which they are calling Brentford Waterside.

Between the High Street and the canal they are proposing to re-create a series of ‘yards’ which will provide pedestrian and vehicular routes separating five courtyard blocks of 7 and 8 storey apartments. To the west of Workhouse Dock two blocks of 7 and 10 storey apartments are proposed next to the canal. Those familiar with the Grand Union at Hayes and the recently completed High Point Village development will be able to anticipate the scale and density of the proposals at Brentford.

A public meeting hosted by the local authority was held in November 2012. Local

organisations attending the meeting, including Brentford Dock Residents Association, Brentford Community Council, Brentford Chamber of Commerce and the Brentford High Street Steering Group were highly critical of the planning application proposals. When the meeting was opened up to the floor for the public to raise questions with the developer and the design team all of the comments made were overwhelmingly hostile.

Our Branch has also made written representations to Hounslow objecting to the proposals as we considered the scheme to be a gross over-development which will have a negative impact on the Grand Union Canal Conservation Area. >> cont p12

Inland Waterways Association 11 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

The intimate character of the existing waterside area will be lost as it will be dominated by tall buildings. Johnson’s Island and the MSO Island are untouched (they are outside the site) but they will still be dwarfed by the surrounding development. The boaters experience on leaving Thames Lock will be to pass through a canyon like space between the proposed peninsula blocks and the existing Brentford Dock flats.

The Local Authority’s web site shows that the application is pending consideration and there is no timetable for a decision to be made.

This suggests that the planning process is currently stalled perhaps as a result of considerable local opposition and the schemes apparent departure from the policies in Hounslow’s 2009 Brentford Area Action Plan; one of only two adopted documents in the emerging Local Plan. We await further news on the progress of the planning application with interest.

Link: http://www.mybrentford.com/brentford2.0

Brentford ‘Making the Connection’ Project Finally a new initiative is set to improve links between the Great West Road, historically known as the ‘Golden Mile’, and Brentford High Street. The scheme is being financed through the Outer London Fund awarded by the Mayor of London.

The project has four main improvement areas:  New lighting to the area under the Great West Road bridge  The overhanging sheds (which form part of the ISIS Brentford Dock West site)  The towpath route to Brentford Lock-described as 'The Moving High Street'  The Market Place in Brentford High Street A planning application for the proposed improvements was submitted to Hounslow in April 2012. We note that ISIS Regeneration initially project managed the application for the Outer London Fund but rather strangely appear to be no longer involved with the detailed application. It also seems odd that the proposals for the overhanging sheds are described as an interim measure prior to ‘the redevelopment of these structures’. We hope that this is not because ISIS now has another agenda for these structures which could place the sheds at risk.

The proposals for the overhanging shed include the removal of the cladding at towpath level. This seems a sensible proposal as it will improve forward visibility for towpath users and give a greater sense of security/safety.

Of greater concern is the proposed slatted cladding to the sides of the sheds. Although this is attractive and will improve the daylight to the interior it may expose the existing steel structure to the elements. We have written to Hounslow to make this point and to suggest that the decorative elements incorporated in the cladding should be canal related.

The proposed improvements to the public realm in the Market Place are welcomed and should complement the Brentford Waterside proposals to regenerate the town centre.

Link: http://www.thebrentfordconnection.com

Ray Gill Planning & Navigation Officer

Inland Waterways Association 12 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

MIDDLESEX MUSINGS Is there anybody out there?

The Middlesex Branch has received a request from a Graduate Structural Engineer at the Institution of Civil Engineers (ICE).

Apparently they have identified the Hanwell flight of Locks and Three Bridges as being of particular engineering interest. As part of the September Open House tours they would like to have one of their engineers on hand for an engineering tour.

The request concluded that if this was acceptable could we supply contact details of the engineer who worked on the project so that he could be contacted with a view to assisting in the tour.

Unfortunately neither of the two project engineers Jessop and Brunel is able to attend as they died in 1815 and 1859. We’ll try to contact them; anyone for Ouija?

Garden gnomes?

Some people have gnomes or fairies at the bottom of their gardens but one of the committee members was in for a surprise.

He wandered down his garden the other day only to find two east European males had set up camp there. Well I never!

Armless mooring?

As reported in the earlier pages, the Slough arm and Aylesbury arm are both closed due to bank collapses. Looking at the pictures it might take a long time to repair both canals.

It would appear that mooring on an arm can damage your boating.

Other arms are available, although I think I’ll give the Wendover arm a miss for a while.

Reading the Brentford Waterside development proposal left me with a cold feeling. We’ve seen what some high-rise developments can end up like after a few years.

I’m not surprised that the local people and all the trade bodies and community groups were up in arms about it.

Let’s hope that Hounslow recognise that they’ve got a great opportunity to develop an area where people and businesses would choose to go rather than somewhere they’d choose to avoid.

A little less conversation The Canal & River Trust are generating a new policy regarding boats overstaying at moorings.

As for the new policy, sounds like ‘Here we go again’, another revamped set of continuous cruising and mooring rules.

There are calls for more affordable moorings and longer maximum stays, but one thing is so obvious that it sticks out a mile and that is if there’s no enforcement of the policy, whether old or new, then nothing will change. So why not try, as the king once said, ‘A little less conversation, a little more action please’.

It’s a jungle out there The reports from Ray about Planning & Navigation issues in our branch area contain some good and some not-so-good proposals.

Terry Liddle Editor.

Inland Waterways Association 13 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

IWA London Region boundaries Chelmsford Branch Chelmer & Blackwater Navigation Mundon (White House Farm) Canal River Thames - north bank east of the old GLC boundary

Chiltern Branch Grand Union Canal - Tail of Stockers Lock to Ship Bridge, Marsworth Grand Union Canal - Aylesbury Arm Grand Union Canal - Wendover Arm

Lee & Stort Branch River Lee from the M25 to Hertford River Stort

Middlesex Branch Grand Union Canal - Paddington Branch West of Ha'penny Bridge Grand Union Canal - River Thames to tail of Stockers Lock Grand Union Canal - Slough Arm

North and East London Branch East London Rivers - Bow Back Rivers Grand Union Canal - Paddington Branch East of Ha'penny Bridge Hertford Union Canal River Lee - River Thames to the M25 Limehouse Cut London Docklands waterways north of the Thames Regents Canal River Roding (including Barking Creek)

South London Branch Grosvenor Canal Kensington Canal London Docklands waterways south of the Thames River Thames - Teddington Weir to the old GLC boundary by Purfleet River Thames - all navigable creeks not part of N E London area

Inland Waterways Association 14 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

AND

FINALLY

Dates for committee meetings for 2013 are given below. Members are welcome to attend.

Meetings start at 8.00pm at the Hillingdon Canal Club, Waterloo Road, Uxbridge UB8 2QX. 30 Jul

24 Sept

26 Nov

YOUR BRANCH COMMITTEE Chairman Vice Chairman Secretary Treasurer Panning/Navigation Membership Sales Social meetings Newsletter Publicity Events Other members

Keith Clayton Michael Phillips Robin Bishop Lucy Smith Raymond Gill Michael Phillips Keith Clayton Robin Bishop Lucy Smith Terry Liddle Lucy Smith Lucy Smith Stephen Bray

020 8573 0883 020 8452 2632 07947451376 07785886255 020 8573 0883 020 8452 2632 07947451376 020 8863 2551 07947451376 07947451376

keith_clayton_1955@yahoo.co.uk michael@shirazphillips.co.uk robinebishop@tiscali.co.uk middlesex.treasurer@waterways.org.uk raycgill@hotmail.com michael@shirazphillips.co.uk keith_clayton_1955@yahoo.co.uk robinebishop@tiscali.co.uk middlesex.socials@waterways.org.uk middlesex.newsletter@waterways.org.uk middlesex.publicity@waterways.org.uk middlesex.events@waterways.org.uk

The newsletter welcomes communications from readers. If you have a point to make, a question to ask, or an interesting picture or article worthy of publication send it to us at Middlesex Matters, 39 Hillview Gardens, Harrow, Middlesex HA2 6HJ Email to: middlesex.newsletter@waterways.org.uk.

NEWSLETTER EDITOR

Terry Liddle

Middlesex Matters is produced using MS Word 2007.

The next publication will be the winter 2013 edition, issue number 32

The views expressed in this Newsletter are not necessarily those of the Inland Waterways Association or of its London Region or of its Middlesex Branch. They are however published as being of interest to our members and readers Š IWA Middlesex Branch 2013 The Inland Waterways Association is a charity campaigning for the conservation, use, maintenance, restoration and development of the inland waterways and is a non profit distributing company limited by guarantee registered in England number 612245 registered as a charity number 212342 whose registered office is at: Island House, Moor Road, Chesham. HP5 1WA. Tel. 01494 783453 http://www.waterways.org.uk

Inland Waterways Association 15 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex

This gas-rig lifeboat is one of the more unusual craft seen moored on the Grand Union near Kensal Green

Did you know?

Amidships Condition of being surrounded by boats Anchor A device designed to bring up mud samples from the bottom at unexpected times Son: When I grow up, dad, I want to join the Hillingdon Canal Club.

Dad: Sorry son, you'll have to choose one or the other.

1st Rule of Boating - If it ain’t broke, don’t use it.

2nd Rule of Boating - If you're working on a wooden boat, never keep your chainsaw near the boat.

Machinists work to the nearest 0.001mm.

Woodworkers work to the nearest 0.5mm.

Boatbuilders do it by eye.

Keep a lookout for Chucklefoot at the IWA’s National Festival.

Inland Waterways Association 16 Middlesex Matters Summer 2013 http://www.waterways.org.uk/regions_branches/london/Middlesex/middlesex