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Wearsitat | Issue: 001
Words by Kat Atkinson
‘Age is just a number.’ But under that carefree persona, that apparent lack of concern for age and everything that comes to represent, is the modern-day woman buckling under the inbuilt societal pressures?
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f we’re not trying to chip away at glass ceilings in the workplace, we’re dealing with (not so much ringing but) the sounding alarm of our biological clocks, unwanted advances and sexualised innuendos from colleagues or even strangers. Along with negative messages fired from the media like bullets from a gun. “Anti” aging, “Anti” sagging, “Prevent” lines and wrinkles. Has anyone actually sat back to consider the mental implications these negative connotations are having on our well-being? It’s no wonder women are finally standing up and saying this is not ok! The overall aim in life, for me anyway, is to look good for my age. I don’t want to look 18 again, or stay youthful forever. I’m not particularly fussed about being able to fit my thighs into a spray-on leather skirt anymore for I have honed my style I know what suits me and I stick with it, a bit like a foolproof recipe of style. I have snoozed my biological clock (for now anyway). For once in my life I am letting me, be me. n the following article’s, I talk to two extraordinary women, all kicking ass in their own fields. Alyson Walsh, a renowned writer for The Guardian, author of two books and creator of ‘That’s not my age’ a website dedicated to dressing for your age and feeling damn good about it too. auren Cokguler a mental health ambassador and brand influencer. I talk to her about it’s like approaching 30 in the modern world and see if her perceptions differ from my own. I also talk to her about the struggles with her mental health and whether all the pressures of being a woman have contributed.
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“I strongly believe it’s not about age, it’s about style” Alyson Walsh
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Wearsitat | Issue: 001
Words by Kat Atkinson
It’s not often you meet someone that radiates such confidence and knowledge that you’re instantly in awe. Well Alyson Walsh is one of those people. It’s safe to say the 54-year-old Blackpool-born journalist, blogger and author knows her stuff when it comes to writing and running a successful blog – ‘That’s not my age’. But, what is especially interesting for me is her mission to empower the over 50s, a demographic that is often forgotten. Having interviewed some of the most famous ‘over 50s’ in the business including the iconic Iris Apfel, Linda Rodin and Lucinda Chambers, she now is a well-equipped role-model herself for the ‘50 something’s’.
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When I asked Alyson to describe her blog ‘That’s not my age’ her passion for the topic was evident; lighting up she said, “I hope it’s empowering, fun and full of practical style advice - It celebrates life and style for women”. The words ‘empowering’ and ‘celebrates’ really resonated with me, the media tends to see aging as the ‘big bad wolf ’ that we’re constantly running scared from. I love Alyson’s take on aging as something we should be celebrating and being older is no less beautiful than being in your 20’s. “It’s not about age, it’s about style” she says. Despite her immense knowledge and intellect, I really feel the key part of Alyson’s success is her personality, she oozes northern charm despite now living in London and her personable nature makes her feel like an old friend rather than a journalist, a tone that she carries through into her writing, “I just wanted to talk to people the way my friends and I talk about clothes, sharing experience and advice in an honest, down-to-earth way.” She’s certainly well qualified to advise others on style – her personal style is unique and instantly recognisable, “My style has been similar throughout my life, I’ve dressed like a tomboy since I was a teenager: think unisex shirts, brogues and tailored jackets. The most important thing is to feel comfortable, at ease and feel like ‘you’” she says. With almost 30,000 followers on Instagram, I am not the only one who appreciates and takes inspiration from the way she dresses. Half-way through the interview, when I approach the topic of milestone pressures, the same topic I had spoken to Lauren Cokguler about; I notice Alyson’s tone change, she seemed almost regretful that she allowed herself to become embroiled in feeling that way. Then it occurred to me - could it be that being an older woman looking back on pressures she faced and how she felt as a younger woman is worse than living through the stereotypes at the time like Lauren is? “I spent most of my 39th year feeling sorry for myself. Poor me. Single, no kids and no sign of the Elle Decoration-ready house I’d imagined”, she says “I thought I’d be more organized/established at that point in my life”. She explained how she had a dream career, meeting famous people on a daily basis and being flown off to exotic locations but that she still didn’t feel fulfilled. But then she started ‘That’s not my age’ ‘It’s made me realise that those kind of milestones are outdated now, we all live complex and fluid lifestyles and there are no rigid rules”... So, although her blog has helped women around the world it’s evident that it was just as cathartic for Alyson herself as she approached her 40’s and the reality that her life wasn’t matching up to the stereotypes forced upon us and taught her to feel empowered by that. Despite looking back and recognising her own struggles Alyson openly admits that it’s much harder for women today than it was for her. “Social media, visual indentity, the gender pay gap – argh it’s a minefield!” She joked. But it’s true. Whilst women have the same pressures Alyson faced, they also have the extra burdens thrown into the pot. Finally, I ask Alyson why it’s important to #knowyourstyle – a slogan and hashtag she regularly uses across her channels. “Confidence comes from things other than clothes, but if your outfit fits well and makes you feel comfortable in all sense of the word, then that’s a good place to start, she says. Great style is about spending time figuring out what works for you, whether that’s experimenting with different silhouettes and textures, mixing high and low fashion or sticking to a tried – and – tested formula, ultimately, style is a very personal thing” Thank you Alyson, for a truly inspirational conversation.
Wearsitat | Issue: 001
Words by Kat Atkinson
1. What encouraged you to start ‘Fashion Panic’? I’d been off work suffering from severe anxiety. I felt useless and wanted to concentrate on something. Although I’d trained to be a teacher, I’d also studied fashion and textiles and had a place to study fashion buying at Salford Uni. In those days (pre Instagram) “fashion” wasn’t a very reliable career path, I also knew my anxiety would limit my choices, so settled with education. During this time off, I discovered fashion bloggers and loved the fact it was real girls, wearing high street clothes, that I could create myself. Six months later, I thought I’d give it a go, and I’ve literally not looked back since!
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2. Do you feel any societal pressures as you approach 30? (e.g. kids, career sorted etc) Hell yes! I’ve never been bothered about my age, but the big 30 just sounds so old and seems like you should 100% know what you’re doing. My anxiety has limited so much in my life, I do feel like I’ve missed out on traveling and having ‘carefree’ times - but my biological clock is ticking and my husband and I would love to have a family. Saying that, I’m surrounded by such inspirational women who are also my age, who are freelancing and following their dreams so I do think everyone has their own path. I also heard fellow blogger @iamjennychat say that she lives by “it’s not your age, it’s your stage” which I love. Don’t compare your journey! 3. How has your style changed throughout your 20s and how do you think it’ll change into your 30s? It’s changed massively! I used to buy anything I liked, regardless of how it would fit into my wardrobe, or where I would wear it. Now I’m much more about sustainable, classic pieces, mixed with a few on-trend styles. I used to spend hundreds of pounds in Primark but as I’ve grown older, I realise the importance of quality and who made my clothes. I spend a lot less than I used to, despite buying more expensive pieces. I wear the same thing regularly and have more of a capsule wardrobe. I also finally feel like my age fits with what I want to wear (suits and blazers). I think I’ve realised you never feel your age. Although mentally I’ve learnt so much, have more confidence and care less about what people think; I still want to wear the same clothes. I can never see me stop shopping at Topshop/ASOS/Zara whereas I used to think there was an age limit on certain shops, but now I know its just how you wear it!
Lauren represents the new wave of influencers, targeting the high lucrative mid 20s to mid 30s demographic she juggles working full time with running her Instagram and blog ‘Fashion Panic’
4. Do you feel like women in their 20s today are facing more milestone pressure than women of the past? If so, why do you think that is? 100%. I know it’s a common story, but when I was in my early 20s, there was little if any social media. Facebook was only just starting and it all felt a bit weird - I remember saying “why would anyone want to look through my holiday photos”. Since then, it seems like everything we do has to be shared. FOMO (fear of missing out) and other phrases have literally cemented the use of sharing social sites, and it’s almost like if there aren’t pictures, why bother! I also think that the idea of beauty has gone to the extreme. I’m not blaming the Kardashians…but they have a lot to answer for. Girls think that you have to look perfect to feel valued, and the saddens me beyond belief. I think we were the last generation who got to enjoy being children. I didn’t wear make up until college, even then there weren’t camera phones, so my image wasn’t splashed across the internet if I was having a bad day. I feel lucky that I was brought up to believe what’s inside is more valuable than what’s on the outside and I think the next generation have SO much pressure, I don’t envy them. I think being a 22 year old woman in 2018 has benefits; we’re being more open about mental health, sexual/mental abuse and seem to be having a ‘Girl Power’ moment again (I was there the first time round!). 5. Have you ever felt any pressure to dress in a certain way? Honestly, no. I think I felt pressure to have the latest trends for Instagram, as it all happens so fast, and I want my followers to know I’m aware of the latest ‘must haves’ - but I’ve honestly always just dressed the way I’ve wanted. Admittedly, I’ve never really been that extreme in my fashion. I have always gone for chic and stylish, but that is what me feels good. I know that pushing boundaries excites some women, and I follow several bloggers who I admire, but would never dream of walking down King Street in one of their looks. I think it’s important to dress exactly how you want. I think bloggers can help or hinder this, as I know I get so envious of the girls wearing my dream outfits that I just can’t afford - but that’s why I follow a range of influencers who mix Zara with Balenciaga! Thanks Lauren!