Apirl 2008
The Global Threat Is there any truth?
Scientology: church or cult? Banged up in Miami
The Oscars The classics that missed out
Euro 2008 preview Bertie’s money - fact or fiction?
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Contents
Editors
Sub Editors
Raymond Groarke Katie O’Rourke
Leesa Flynn Michael Hanley Karl O’Brien Paul Mallon Phillip Ellis
Features Layout and Design
Travel
Laura-Kate Dempsey Jane Ward Katie O’Rourke
Entertainment Sports
Email: Advertising
Graphic Design
Maverick was produced by journalism students in the Journalism and Media Faculty of Griffith College Dublin, SCR, Dublin 8. Tel.- 01 4150400 maverick.griffithcollege@ yahoo.com
Raymond Groarke
Jane Ward
Allegiance to Ahern Paul Mallon chronicles the slow downfall of one of Ireland’s greatest political vote getters. Bertie Ahern is the most successful politician in Irish history. We know his vices, his pet hates and now his finances. Public support is beginning to wane for the "father of the Celtic Tiger"; The Mahon Tribunal continues to deliver swift blows to the gut while Fine Gael nibble at his boot laces and The Greens remain in front row, afraid to look. The similarities between Charlie Bertie are obvious, with sources usually leading to an evaporation of footprints on an already vague money trail. As Enda Kenny put it "the pupil is now replicating the teacher". Ahern obviously realised what he was missing and opened several bank accounts in different AIB branches. He doesn't remember opening many of the accounts. Toxic fumes from certain AIB branches seem to trigger amnesia in our bemused leader. Bertie Ahern is a qualified accountant. Are we really expected to believe that he would deem it appropriate to have no bank account while being Finance Minister? How about the notion that a qualified accountant became confused as to the exact nature of a political donation. It seems accountants may also have trouble in judging when they are tax liable. The fact is that this fiasco is yet another branch on the Fianna Fail tree of corruption and public misdirection. The real question which we must ask ourselves is how a man with
little respect for the public's intelligence can remain in power. What is more startling is the indifferent reaction from sections of the media and the public. Kevin Myers (Irish Independent), wrote that tribunals finding corruption in government was like "sticking a shovel into the ground." Myers comments imply that things are better than they were, but things could get worse. Not only is this attitude a justification for ignorance of political ethics, but also the reason why Fiannia Fail seem to have endless charisma in elections and polls. Irish people seem devoid of any strong political opinions. We vote under the influence of media personalities rather than using any sort of political logic. Revelations about Ahern's finances were thrust into the media just before the general election. Opposition leaders pass every test required to be valid contenders to the throne, only failing to clear the hurdle of not being named Bertie Ahern. Suggestions that Enda Kenny could be the next Taoiseach are revoked by suggestions that such an action could plunge Ireland into the past. Ridiculous, of course, but enough to persuade the majority of voters that Bertie is indeed the second coming. Irish politics has inevitably followed the American style of political campaigning. The carefully constructed image of the politician has been pushed to the
forefront leaving political policy and action secondary. There is a sign that the tide may be turning. Recent opinion polls conducted by The Sunday Business Post say that 53% of people polled say that they do not believe the Taoiseach's evidence at the Tribunals. 50% no longer believe he should run the country. However Fiannia Fail support has increased since the last opinion poll by one percent to 37% with Fine Gael support decreasing by one percent to 31%. Realistically, many polls can be hugely inaccurate; this sort of public reaction is common. People feel that
Bertie's finances are personal to him. Most of the accusations relating to him occured in the nineties, when he was Minister for Finance. This is not the failing of one man but instead, an entire government hierarchy. Their defence of his unethical behaviour shows that not only does the current government lack any level of accountability within its ranks but also that at the heart of the Dail is a corrupt party. By the next election Bertie Ahern's reputation will lie parallel to the disgrace of corrupt Fianna Fail men who came before. Fianna Fail will be re-elected while Ireland breathes a sigh of relief.
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A Thing of Beauty is a Gift Forever They're everywhere you look. Sported by the world’s biggest celebrities on the covers of glossy fashion magazines as well as the lower backs of women around Dublin, the tattoo’s journey from ancient Eastern to modern Western culture and into common usage is a fascinating one. Danny Wynne talks ink. The word 'tattoo' comes from the Tahitian “tatu” meaning “to mark something”. Experts believe the art of tattooing has existed since 12,000 BC. The earliest tattoos are to be found in ancient Egypt from the period of the construction of The Great Pyramids. As Egypt began to
bigger, but then again so has the competition,” a Dublin tattooist comments. All classes of people seek the best tattoo artists. The rise in popularity of a previously misconceived artform has placed tattooists in the same category as fine artists. Styles now combine more traditional art with the artist's own concepts to create modern masterpieces for people to carry with them forever.
Tattoo Facts In Ancient Greece tattoos were used among spies to mark their ranking. The Romans used them to mark criminals and slaves expand their empire, the art-form spread with it into Crete, mainland Greece and Persia. The Ainu of Western Asia used tattooing as a method of indicating social status. They are noted for introducing the art-form to Japan where it developed into a religious and ceremonial rite. Polynesians used tattoos to mark tribal communities, families and rank. Spread to the indigenous tribes of New Zealand by the Maori, they developed their distinctive style of facial tattooing called Ta Moko which is used even to this day. According to one of Dublin's most prolific tattoo artists: “The first elec-
tronic tattoo machine was invented by an American tattoo artist named Samuel O’Reilly in 1990.” The invention gave birth to a new era of tattooing in which people started to have different kinds of tattoos put on various parts of their body. At this time however, tattoos were not respected, they were frowned upon, considered as a thing of nonsense associated with criminals. Tattooing is now more popular and widely accepted than it has ever been. “The demand for tattoo studios and various types of tattoos has grown in Ireland. I’ve worked back and forth for about ten years in Ireland and it’s definitely become
36% of people aged 18-25 and 40% percent of those aged 26-40, have at least one tattoo The top 5 most commonly requested designs among women are tribal, cross, stars, butterflies and fairies Historically tattoos were used as a way of smuggling messages accross enemy lines in times of wars The world’s most tattood man is Tom Leppard from Scotland who has 99.9% of his body covered with a leopard-skin design.
The Evolution Revolution Leesa Flynn questions: “Where are we going with this?” Long ago monkeys roamed this planet in place of human-beings. Today we are the result of the evolution of these creatures. Every so often humans change slightly. The strongest traits and the most dominant characteristics are what survive and get carried on into the next generation. It has taken us a long time to get to where we are today, but is there really much difference? With only a 2% difference between human and chimp DNA you have to wonder how much we have really evolved. Scientists have proven and recorded this phenomenal process time and time again. The facts are undeniable, however un-delectable it
may be for people to admit we come from monkeys. We may well consider ourselves superior and slightly more attractive than our hairy ancestors, but we are in fact still evolving, albeit in a rather subtle style. Our physical characteristics are the most notable change. The human forehead is no longer as protuberant as our predecessors' with smaller eyebrows and less sunken eyes. Perhaps a more defining feature is the evolution of the human jaw. Everyone has to go through the annoyance of developing wisdom teeth but have you ever wondered why we even need them? We don't! Our wisdom teeth link us to our prehistoric relatives who needed them for digesting their coarse diet of leaves roots nuts and meat. The removal of wisdom teeth has only very recently become practice, as up until recently they were very necessary. Some people nowadays don't
There’s only a 2% difference between human and chimp DNA even develop wisdom teeth. So it's possible we may now be entering the next stage of our evolution. The birth of a child is a very special moment, but what if your bundle of joy arrives with a few added extras? People around the world are born with extra fingers and toes and with changes to their internal organs. There has been an increase in the
number of babies born in recent years without an appendix, the part of the digestive system once necessary for digesting grass. So who knows what's left for us? It is believed that human life has only existed for around 12,000 years yet the universe is thought to be anywhere between 12 and 16 billion years old. We still have a lot of growing up to do.
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Maintaining the Fiction
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Raymond Groarke investigates why the Church of Scientology receives so much negative press “Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wants to make a million dollars, he should start his own religion.” These are the words of Lafayette Ron Hubbard, the founder of the Church of Scientology, as stated in Russell Miller’s book, The Bare Faced Messiah. Another interesting fact in The Bare Faced Messiah is that L. Ron Hubbard was an accomplished hypnotist. The Anderson Report, an inquiry into The Church of Scientology, conducted in 1965 in Australia, found that Scientology’s process of auditing people involved command hypnosis, in which the subject falls under the spell of the person conducting the session. The hypnotist then assumes positive authoritative control over the patient. The report found that most Scientology techniques are those of authoritative hypnosis. So, to put it simply, you have a creative writer, competent in hypnotism, who says the best way to make a million dollars is to start a religion. He in turn starts one, and becomes gloriously wealthy off the back of it. The church’s doctrine warns that even adherents who are cleared of engrams (painful events from the past that engrave themselves into the subconscious as inaccessible memories) face grave spiritual dangers unless they are pushed to higher and more expensive levels. Hubbard’s idea that all humans are descendants of an exiled alien race known as Thetans reeks of Walter Mitty syndrome. Scientologists strenuously deny being part of a cult. However, it is alleged that families have been split up and torn apart by this pay-as-youpray religion, and in 1991 TIME magazine dubbed it ‘The Thriving Cult of Greed and Power.’ Currently, the Scientology leader is David Miscavige, who former followers say is cunning, ruthless and paranoid. He has been said to buy massive quantities of the Church’s own books from retail stores to propel the titles onto best-seller lists. The Church of Scientology reacts ferociously to any sort of criticism and has an inability to deal with any such
negativity. This causes society’s uneasiness towards them. These overreactions to any negative coverage and their dedication to secrecy breed fear and suspicion rendering the church a cult in the eyes of many, instead of a fully-fledged religion. Even when you become a member it seems that unless you’re prepared to make Scientology the fulcrum of your life, you are not entirely welcome. It is promoted by enthusiasts as a step-by-step religion, but for each step there is a hefty charge. Of course the steps are many and thus lead to a long and expensive journey. It appears obvious that the inten-
“If a man really wants to make a million dollars, he should start his own religion.”
tion of the Church of Scientology is to make money, and lots of it; not to help people, nor to offer support to those who have suffered, but to prey on them and subsequently relieve them of their savings. If they were serious about helping people they wouldn’t charge them for spiritual improvement. The Cult Awareness Network (CAN) in America, that monitors religious cults, received more complaints concerning Scientology than any other group. The Church was listed at the top of their cult list, until they went into bankruptcy from suits initiated by The Church of Scientology in 1996. The CAN were bought in Bankruptcy Court by the Church of
Protesters wear Guy Fawkes masks in front of the Church of Scientology in New York in February this year. Scientology in 1997 which now operates the new Cult Awareness Network as a promotional arm of the Church. While making a BBC Panorama documentary on Scientology in 2007, John Sweeney, an investigative journalist, claimed to have been shouted at, stalked, had his hotel invaded at midnight, denounced as a “bigot” by star Scientologists and spied on during his wedding, with the perpetrator fleeing the moment he was challenged. Scientology devotes vast resources to silencing its critics. Since 1986, Hubbard and his Church has been the subject of many books criticising its very existence. In numerous cases, writers have been badgered and sued heavily. Those who disparage the Church often find themselves stalked by private eyes, framed for fictional crimes, beaten up or threatened with death. The Church of Scientology isviewd as a warped, manipulative monster; with a gluttonous thirst for cash. It is a cult, founded by a great painter of lies and inventor of jargon, in order to make money and massage egos. According to TIME
magazine, the founder of this enterprise was a true storyteller. Hubbard served in the Navy during World War II and soon afterwards Church brochures described him falsely as an “extensively decorated” World War II hero who was crippled and blinded in action, twice pronounced dead and miraculously cured through Scientology. In a 1984 case in which the Church sued a Hubbard biographical researcher, a California judge concluded that its founder was “a pathological liar”. Vicki Aznaran, who was one of the Church’s six key leaders until she left the Church in 1987, stated: “This is a criminal organisation, day in and day out.” Cynthia Kisser, former head of The Cult Awareness Network said, “The Church of Scientology is quite likely the most ruthless and classically terroristic; the most litigious and the most lucrative cult America has ever seen.” The Church operates one of the most elaborate pictures of deception we have ever seen. A tangled web of lies, manipulation and mistrust, it is unlike any other religion I am aware of and I cannot fathom why anybody would be a part of it.
Animals Aid Autism
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Guide dogs have long been used to assist blind people in everdyay life. It has now been discovered that they can be trained to improve the quality of life for autistic children. Fiona Craughan tells one family’s story.
Each day, people see the benefit an animal can bring to someone’s life. Today, dogs are being used to assist children with autism. The project that originated in the United States was introduced to Ireland four years ago. Participating in this project has greatly improved communication between parents and their autistic children. One of the problems associated with autism is that an autistic child will rarely look directly at you when speaking. It is said that they always look past you. However, according to some parents involved in the scheme, their relationship with their children has improved immensely. Children with autism find it very stressful to be in unfamiliar surroundings and are unable to deal with crowded situations. These problems have made it very hard for parents to live a normal life. The assisting dogs are trained to help both the parents and the child deal with the problems associated with autism. They bring stability and comfort to the child at all times, allowing the parent to bring the child outside its comfort zone without hassle. The
dogs are trained to be patient and always stay calm in uneasy situations, further reassuring the child. Sometimes, when autistic children are taken out of their surroundings, they try to run away. To prevent this from happening, the children are attached at the hip to the dog’s harness at all times. Going for walks is once again a possibility for the parent without the worry of the child running out in front of a car. The dog walks in front , attached to the child. Anytime they come to a road, the dog sits and waits. If there is a possibility of danger, the dog will also respond to voice commands from the parent. Simple outings, such as shopping and socialising have again become possible for these parents. One mother, Fiona Whooley, became involved in the project and can’t stress how much the dog has brought the family together. Fiona’s five-year-old boy, Robert, was diagnosed with autism as a toddler. In the beginning, Fiona was devastated because she had heard how difficult some children with autism can be. Three years ago she heard about the project for the first
A boy’s best friend time and was very interested to learn more. “When I first got the dog, Robert was not very interested in it, but after a short time he developed an amazing bond with the dog and it just changed him. He is a happy boy now, who likes to go for walks and doesn’t mind unfamiliar surroundings because he has Tom, the assisting dog. The connection Robert has with him is worth everything to me. I would seriously recommend this scheme to anyone with an autistic child. It certainly improved my life. I can go meet my friends, take him to the cinema, and he actually enjoys it. The reason why this works is because Tom has been trained to stay with Robert at all times which is how the bond developed. When Robert first met Tom, he was told that Tom needed him and he was not to leave him. This gave him a sense of responsibility which made him very proud, which was great because you
wouldn’t have been able to just tell Robert not to leave the dog. It doesn’t work that way.” Assisting dogs have given parents the confidence to bring their children out to socialise and to once again do the daily chores. Now that the parent doesn’t have to constantly hold onto the child anymore, their hands are free to write a cheque, push a trolley or even use a public toilet, which before was not possible. An organisation in America, 4 Paws for Ability, believes that “the scheme is a life saving miracle for a child paired with one of the autism assistance dogs. It brings so much hope to the parents.” The dog is a great benefit to the parents, but is an even greater one to the child. Each dog brings the child friendship and companionship, as well as unconditional love, bringing independence to both child and parent; it is clear the power of animals can never be underestimated.
Posh Wash These Dublin dogs are anything but “ruffing” it, as Jane Ward finds out. A few years ago in Ireland it would have seemed crazy even to put a coat on a dog let alone dye it pink. Mutt Ugly is the first shop in Ireland to offer this unique service to anyone who wants a rainbow coloured pooch. Sinead from the shop says that the blue and pink hounds were to draw attention to the other services that they have available and to encourage people to get their dogs groomed
regularly. By getting your dog’s nails clipped on a regular basis it prevents the dog’s dew claw from growing into the skin and saves having to eventually bring the dog to the vet to have it removed. Even bringing the dog regularly to have its teeth brushed will benefit them as a build up of plaque will lead to an eventual vet visit. They have a fantastic variety of services that might surprise even the most informed dog owner. For €20 you can get your dog a pedicure finished off with a coat of nail polish. These services might seem crazy to some…okay, most people but it’s important for the dog’s general health to maintain a regular grooming routine. They can have bad hair days too.
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Is the Power of One Enough? Karl O’Brien questions whether or not our individual eco-actions really make a difference. By the year 2020 extreme weather will be the norm, causing global devastation. By 2040, much of Europe will be Saharan and parts of London will be underwater. These are just some of the catastrophic predictions made by James Lovelock, an outspoken but highly respected British scientist. He introduced the Gaia hypothesis, a revolutionary theory that the Earth is a selfregulating super-organism. This idea was initially ridiculed by his contemporaries as new age nonsense, but today forms the basis of almost all climate science. In a recent interview with The Guardian (01/03/2008), Lovelock dismissed the climate-friendly tasks we are encouraged to participate in, such as ethical consumption, carbon offsetting and extensive recycling. ‘The idea that individual lifestyle adjustments can save the planet are deluded fantasies, Lovelock says. “It’s just too late for it,” he adds. The Power of One campaign promotes energy efficiency for Ireland and plays with the notion that actions taken by individuals can lead to a reversal in climate change. Its website states: “If each of us becomes aware of our own power when it comes to energy efficiency, and uses it properly, we can collectively make a big difference.” Lowering your central heating thermostat may cut your heating bill by 10 per cent, but whether or not it will stave off those country-engulfing tidal waves is another question entirely. Power of One asks people to
“avoid unnecessary electricity use” to help reduce national carbon emissions between 5pm and 7pm, the very time slot in which most fill kettles, boil vegetables and stare at television. It is here that all these guidelines begin to seem a little fanciful, if not farfetched. Interestingly, in this noble battle against impending doom, very seldom are airlines scolded, for example.
“By 2040, much of Europe will be Saharan and parts of London will be underwater.” Again, the individual car owner is almost solely to blame for sky-rocketing carbon emissions - especially SUV drivers. Similarly, the carbon emissions produced by large-scale building projects or those produced by herds of livestock go seemingly unnoticed. If Irish voters ratify the upcoming EU Lisbon Treaty, Ireland will be obliged to further reduce its carbon emissions to aid the fight against global warming. Once again, it appears the onus will be on the individual. Best ditch that BMW X5, so. On the 16th of February 2005, the Kyoto protocol came into force with the objective of reducing greenhouse gases. While some saw this as a
triumph of international cooperation between scientists, others labelled it a case of ‘too little, too late’. Sceptics believe the evidence for global warming is inconclusive and the field is populated with argument and uncertainty. An article on the newscientist.com website reveals why: “The apparent scientific consensus over global warming only exists [sceptics say] because it is enforced by a scientific establishment riding the gravy train, aided and abetted by governments keen to play the politics of fear. Some may dismiss such claims as politically motivated and with no basis in fact, especially as the majority of sceptics are economists, business people or politicians, not scientists.” It is known that certain gases in the atmosphere, most importantly water vapour and carbon dioxide, trap infrared radiation emitted by the Earth’s surface and produce what is known as a greenhouse effect. In itself, this is not seen as detrimental, as without these gases, the planet would freeze. It is widely accepted also that human activity pumps carbon dioxide into the atmosphere and that this has caused a sustained yearon-year rise in CO2 concentrations. For almost 60 years, measurements at the Mauna Loa Observatory in Hawaii have charted this rise, and it is widely accepted that today’s concentrations are about 35 per cent above pre-industrialisation levels. According to newscientist.com, at the turn of the millennium researchers
based at Imperial College London examined satellitdadata covering almost three decades to plot changes in the amount of infrared radiation escaping from the atmosphere into space - an indirect measure of how much heat is being trapped. In the part of the infrared spectrum trapped by CO2, they found that between 1970 and 1997 less andless radiation was escaping. They concluded that the increasing quantity of atmospheric CO2 was trapping energy that used to escape, and storing it in the atmosphere as heat. These facts remain uncontested, and are enough to establish that greenhouse gas emissions caused by human activity are tending to make the atmosphere warmer. Temperature records from around the world going back 150 years suggest that 19 of the 20 warmest years - measured in terms of average global temperature, which takes account of all available thermometer data have occurred since 1980. It appears undeniable that the Earth is getting gradually warmer. Have we cataclysm on our hands, or are the shifts a result of a changing, self-regulating Earth, instead of climate hiccups caused by us inconsiderate humans? Lovelock feels global warming is now irreversible. Parts of the planet will become too hot to inhabit, others will end up submerged and mass migration and famine will be epidemics. However, don’t stop dividing your rubbish into coloured wheelie bins just yet; Lovelock has given us at least another 20 years.
Maverick
Back on Rory’s Stomping Ground
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The Rory Gallagher International Tribute Festival returns this summer to pay homage to the life and talents of Ireland’s greatest blues guitarist. Offering unbeatable value for money, this is music at its best, writes Laura Dempsey. This coming June bank holiday weekend will see over 4,000 Rory Gallagher fans descend on Ballyshannon, Co.Donegal, the celebrated blues guitarist’s hometown, for the 7th annual Rory Gallagher Tribute Festival. This year marks Rory’s 60th birthday and the festival, which runs from Thursday 29th May to Sunday 1st June will feature blues, rock and acoustic guitar workshops and sessions, with open air concerts and late night gigs lined up for each night of the four day festival. Regarded as one of the best guitarists of all time, Rory Gallagher first shot to fame as the founding member of Irish rock band Taste, before going on to have a successful solo career.
It is his live performances, however, that earned him his legendary status. The most notable of these being his Irish tour in ’74 which was released as a film documentary, and will be screened as one of the many events lined up for the weekend. This years’ programme will see some 32 acts take to the stage, attracting bands from Italy, Holland, Germany, France and the US, along with several local and Irish talents.Look out for Sinnerboy and The Brian Meakin Band making a welcome return. Bringing the festival to a close on Sunday is a Jamboree where anyone with an instrument is invited to play, while live bands have been invited to perform and showcase their talent through out the day.
Rory’s live performance earned him his legendary status Rory Gallagher was born in Ballyshannon in 1948, but grew up in Cork City. Teaching himself to play the guitar at age 9, he was 15 when he bought the sunburst 1961 Fender Stratocaster he became synoymous with. Releasing 16 albums before his untimely death due to complications following a liver transplant in June 1995, Rory sold over 30 million albums worldwide and toured the world several times, touring the US more than 25 times in total. In 1972, he was named Melody Makers’ Musician of the year, before being invited to record with The Rolling Stones as a replacement for Mick Taylor in 1975. Three years later, aged 29, he became the first ever performer on Rockpalast, broadcasting live to 15 counties with an estimated 50 million viewers. A legend in his own right, Rory Gallagher is said to have inspired many of today’s’ top guitarists, including U2’s The Edge, Brain May from Queen, and Slash of Guns’n’Roses.In the 12 years following his death in 1995, many tributes have been paid to this legendary blues rock guitarist. In 1996, Hot Press presented U2’s The Edge with the First Annual Rory Gallagher Rock Musician Award. The Following year, St. Paul’s Street Square in Cork was renamed Rory Gallagher Place and a tribute sculpture was erected in his honour. In 2002, Rory Gallagher featured in a series of stamps issued by An Post paying homage to Irish Rock Legends. More recently, in 2006, a life-size bronze statue of Rory’s infamous Stratocaster was placed at Rory Gallagher Corner in Dublins Temple Bar.
Meanwhile, the count down to this years tribute festival in Ballyshannon is well and truly under way. Further information and a full festival programme is available from the official website www.goingtomyhometown.ie . The campsite will be open from Thursday 29th May at a cost of only €25 per tent per night, with showering facilities also available. All of the gigs are free,with the exception of the late night concerts each night.Tickets for these are still a bargain at between 10-12 euro.Enquires can be made to Barry O’Neill on 086 8772325 or by emailing Barryfest@hotmail.com, you can also check out the festivals’ bebo page.Trust me, this is a festival not to be missed!
Maverick’s Recommended Downloads Philby Follow Me I Fall Apart Crest of a Wave I’m Not Awake Yet Messin’ with the Kid Wave Myself Goodbye Don’t Know Where I’m Going
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Thailand Uncovered Sarah Rowe looks into Thailand’s notorious sex industry. Thailand has increasingly become one of the hottest holiday destinations for Irish J1 students, many of them head to Thailand with little knowledge of the place they are visiting. Thailand’s obvious attractions are the vast amount of night clubs, bars, cheap food and drink and of course prostitutes. The reality in Thailand is somewhat less appealing than the dream holiday advertised in glossy brochures. Thai nightclubs are home to ‘katoeys’ otherwise known as ‘lady boys’. These lady boys are the epitome of attraction and sexiness. Some have undergone lengthy surgical procedures to change their genitals and have had their Adams apple surgically shaved in order to become more feminine. They also take oestrogen hormones in order to obtain the ideal hourglass figure and a softer speaking voice.
The most popular occupation for the lady boys is prostitution. They pry on ‘falangs’ or ‘westerners’ in nightclubs for their income. Many of these prostitutes’ customers are Thai married men. They allegedly are not gay but open to sexual experimentation. Their wives simply accept their husbands’ unusual sexual vices. This has been going on for years in Thailand. The prostitutes take home their clients and on finding out that the lady boy is male, the results of this revelation can be deadly. In some reports the lady boys have been known to brutally attack the clients using knifes. Bing, a 22 year old lady boy who has been living in Bangkok for 7 years says she has felt female from a very young age. “I was probably only 5 or 6 when I started wearing girls’ clothes. My family accepted that this was the way I was. It is my job to make the customers happy.” If Bing had a choice she would have been born a girl. “Every lady boy would tell you the same,” she said. Unlike Bing, many prostitutes in Thailand have a limited choice of occupation. Eak, a 23-year-old escort, was forced to sell his body to obtain enough money to support his
Banged Up Abroad Drunk and disorderly in the USA; a Griffith College student reveals all. The story of prisoner number 6650831F .
Arms behind my back bound with chicken wire and being escorted to the back of an armoured truck. No windows or bars just a door. Darkness sets in and at this point you may be thinking I am on my way to Guantanamo Bay. This, however, is not the case; I am finishing the end of a fantastic four week vacation to Miami Florida. But how the hell have I ended up in this situation? 30 odd minutes
Khao San Road, Bangkok family after the Burmese army raped and killed his fellow villagers. Eak had no identity card or work permit and so lived on low-paying jobs. That was until someone told him of a more lucrative employment opportunity in the escort/prostitution business. He feels satisfied about his occupation, as he can support his family and protect himself. “I remember to use a condom almost every time I have sex with clients, maybe one in ten times I don’t.” AIDS has gripped the country with more than 1 in 100 adults infected with HIV. With a population of 65 million AIDS has become a leading cause of death. Maylee, a pretty 24- year-old prostitute from Northern Thailand, once studied to become a veterinarian at a Thai University before the 1997 Asian
financial meltdown forced her family into bankruptcy and destitution. She worries about her family and contracting HIV. “I have 3 little sisters, and if it weren’t for this, they wouldn’t eat. My body is hard currency.” In the prostitution trade, the paler skinned girls from the North are preferred to the darker skinned girls from the ethnic Muslim and Malay South. These girls are exported to brothels as sex-slaves all over the world after being sold by their poverty stricken parents. The Thai government is reluctant to intervene and the industry is helped along with the support of Thailand’s tourists. This makes it difficult to anticipate any reform in the near future meaning many young prostitutes will continue to be exploited.
later the truck halts to a stop and me and what can only be described as a Columbian drug baron are sent hurtling through the air. Thankfully, he was a decent fella who warned me, “Watch your back in here”. After a brief induction, and a search, I was led with a bunch of other ‘criminals’ to the holding cells. Now pause for a minute and picture a 12 stone white Irish boy sitting amongst 300 pound black dudes and Hispanics from Miami. A funny sight by all means, but not from where I was sitting. Thoughts raced through my head; my mouth is dry but my requests for a glass of water are met with a, “Sit down and shut up”. In the cell, a man is sitting on the left with his feet in a bucket of water that has turned black with filth. He takes his feet out and his runners are on, he lies back on his bed and the water spills all over his sheets and he sleeps. A wrinkled old African Amercian is going through a bin, he’s apparently looking for an orange peel. There are 3 toilets down the end and no toilet roll. Over 60 guys in a room and three toilets! “Ok”, I think to myself, I have no idea how long I’m going to be in here and I am certainly getting
no assistance from the guards who are rarely seen anyway. The mental arguments I am having with myself at this stage have almost become comical; I’m insane! Suddenly out of nowhere I am approached by a giant man who introduces himself as Keke. I’m attempting to chat with him but the out of control man behind me on the phone is yelling to what I can only gather is his ‘bitch’ (as he calls her that repeatedly), about how he will finish off “that mother fucker” when he’s out. Time passes and although my fears of any sort of attack are fading away (jokes have been passed by now about the ‘crazy whiskey loving Irish boy’), I am still anxious to get the hell out. Last I heard from the guys they were trying to bail me out; this can take hours I’m informed by Keke. After dozing off, I’m awoken by my name being yelled, I bolt up in my bed and shout, “Yeah, that’s me”. “You’re out, come follow me”. I couldn’t even begin to explain the relief I felt. Then to my complete amazement, as I approach the cell exit, Keke and a few of the guys all come over and start slapping hands with me. I’m out.
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Heading Stateside With semester one behind us and summer just around the corner, Katie O’ Rourke gives a quick guide to four of the most popular J1 destinations. place to get jobs and accommoda- one of the most popular destinations are dangers involved in crossing the New York tion as long as you arrive early. Many for Irish students travelling on a J1. border. New York is one of the most well known cities in America. Located on the east coast, it’s a less popular choice for J1 students who usually only stop off there on their way to somewhere else.
Recommended for people who: love the idea of living in a very busy and bustling city.
It’s good for: its many shops and all the great sights that it has to offer. New York has back to back restaurants and bars and this is by far the best job to get in New York. Tips are mandatory so you could make a considerable amount of money. It is easy to walk around the city as it’s flat and easy to navigate; the subway is also a popular choice and it’s extremely efficient. Accommodation and jobs are easier to find because it’s less popular for J1 students than cities on the West Coast. Downsides: Accommodation can be expensive so it’s advised to head out of the city to find cheaper alternatives. The climate in New York in the summer can be extremely humid so that’s something you should be prepared for.
San Fransisco San Francisco is north of San Diego and has a distinct Cosmopolitan buzz with an eclectic mix of people and cultures.
Recommended for People who: are looking for a more rounded experience. San Fran is full of outstanding architecture including the famous Golden Gate Bridge. You can meet a lot of interesting Americans especially in Berkeley and get a more fulfilling experience. It’s good for: a lively bar and club scene. The vast student campus of Berkeley where accommodation and living is cheaper than downtown San Fran is easily linked by the Bay Area Rapid Transport System (BART). There is no denying that compared to San Diego this is a good
frat houses and Co-ops are open to Irish students at reasonable prices. There are a lot of retail jobs such as American eagle, Forever 21 and Abercrombie and Fitch. San Fran has a big Irish population so if you’re really stuck you could always try one of the numerous Irish Bars. Downsides: San Fran has a slightly cooler climate then the rest of California. Similar to Ireland, it can get a little chilly as it is prone to quite heavy fog. It can come out of nowhere so you should always carry around a jumper just in case. Downtown San Fran can be very expensive to eat and drink, so the best bet is to avoid the tourist areas.
Recommended for people who:
love the beach as it is located on the sandy West coast of California. If you love chilled out days and a crazy nightlife then this is the place for you. It’s good for: Sunny weather. There are also lots of activities in San Diego including Sea World and many Americans themselves holiday there. It’s also very close to the Mexican border where the legal drinking limit is 18; this can be a deal breaker for many students but there
The downsides: It can be difficult to find work and accommodation as there are many students living there in the summer months. Also, landlords can be reluctant to give accommodation to Irish students due to previous mishaps. If your idea of meeting lots of Irish people in a laid back city appeals to you then this is a good place to go; if not then you may want to look elsewhere. Bear in mind some people end up living in hostels for the whole summer which can be very costly especially if you haven’t found a job.
Chicago Chicago is the third largest city in the US. Located on the shores of Lake Michigan it has a unique atmosphere and is the business and financial hub of the Mid West.
Recommended for people who: want to experience a piece of the real America and who want to spend time in a hip and happening city with lots to do and see. It’s good for: some of the best Jazz and blues clubs in America. It is also home to many baseball teams and a match is a must see while you’re there. People in Chicago love the Irish, so it’s relatively easy to find accommodation and jobs. Many American students leave Chicago in the summer months freeing up numerous job opportunities. There are also lots of festivals that happen in the summer. Downsides: Chicago can be very humid in the summer and it’s important to get there early so as to avoid disappointment with accommodation etc. but for the most part there are a lot of opportunities in the city.
San Diego San Diego has rapidly become
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10
Maverick
The Tide Conductor
Oisin O’Brien is a third year Journalism Student. This is an extract from his forthcoming novel, The Tide Conductor... The moon illuminated a small portion of the black sky around her; giving off just enough light to see a smokey cloud slide by. After the brief encounter the cloud was on its way again into the night sky intertwining with stars and ascending prayers. Beautiful Luna was naked again free from the torments of that inquisitive cloud. It had been a long time since I had seen such detail on her before, each shadowy canyon and crater clearly visible. She hung so full and free, almost bursting at the seams, her pale face freckled in black. Her texture was so rich and creamy it reminded me of a pint of Guinness with its white head slightly tarnished by a black residue from the tip of the draught tap. What is it about a full moon that catches our attention? Before we even look up we know its going to be full. A spark ignites inside us like clockwork urging us to behold the majesty of the tide conductor. Is it her sheer gravitational pull drawing all the water in our bodies towards her or is it merely an infinite search for our own personal paradise? I was in a trance staring at Luna for she captivated me. I yearned to be with
her; solitary and safe like a baby to its mothers bosom, like the soft sand of a newly discover island running through an explorers weary hands. My connection was broken by the cries of an irritated baby behind me. I averted my gaze from the window and scanned the many faces with so many different expressions. Buses are strange. If there was enough space everyone would sit by themselves content with their own thoughts. Even when there is not enough space some people still reserve the seat beside them for their precious luggage, petrified at the thought that someone interesting might sit beside them and start a conversation. This bus was far from empty; this bus was the 5pm express from the city; packed with commuting workers, students, shoppers, foreigners and one hysterical baby and his ever reddening mother. The child refused to pay attention to the mother’s feeble attempts with the pacifier and seemed to become even more agitated after every ‘Shush’. I felt sorry for her, I reckon she was in her thirties but looked closer to fifty from stress. Her embarrassment regarding the child’s display forced her eyes to apologize to the other passengers for her. Why be embarrassed by the actions of a life which you created? Rejoice in the fact that he has eyes in which to weep from. So many people crammed into a sardine tin on wheels, driven by a tattoo sleeved bus driver who was more concerned about anything edible being brought onto his precious bus rather than the safety of its passengers. All these people have their own stories, personalities, faith,family and higher purpose and yet here they sit with their
heads buried in books, earphones in ears, eyes fixed on mobiles or day dreaming into the back of the seat in front of them, must avoid eye contact at all cost, but why? The journey would be so much more refreshing and liberating if people talked to each other. Why can we not look each other in the eyes, the most beautiful organs we possess? Peoples eyes have seen the most soul warming, horrific, surreal and life changing wonders that have ever been born from the inner depths of God’s subconscious and yet we are afraid to look into someone else’s and speak. We could find out things about one another that inspire, that make us feel alive, solve each others problems, we could create a unity among mankind that could filter out all the hatred, bleed dry the evil that clogs the earths veins.
“Beautiful Luna was naked again free from the torments of that inquisitive cloud.”
The young man sitting beside me was totally engrossed in his music. His feet were playing along to the drum beat, while his head nodded along to
the driving guitar rhythm. I watched him for a while, every so often he spun the dial on his iPod with such assured elegance that I knew he had landed on the desired track. He was completely entranced by the music. Was he imagining himself playing this music in front of thousands of adoring fans or was he simply feeling the rhythms; at one with the combination of instruments creating a musical harmony? Is this what I looked like a few minutes previous when in awe of Luna’s majestic charm? I felt like this young man with his lower lip piercing and spiked black hair was on the same wave length as me. Could he be interested in my day dreamed theory of talking to strangers? He had to be, I mean everybody needs a little push to get talking, I suppose it’s just because there is too much paranoia floating around looking for fresh minds to infect. I gave him a gentle tap on the shoulder. He sprung from his musical coma, removed an earphone from his right ear and eyed me a look built of both anger and fear. I pointed out the window beside me to Luna who seemed to glow ever more spectacular the second she knew someone was looking. “Have you ever seen a moon as beautiful as that in all your life?” he looked at me and then out the window for a split second, he placed the vacant earphone back in his ear, picked up his bag and headed for the back of the bus to the one remaining seat beside the screaming baby and its mother. Maybe the human race is not quiet ready to openly share their feelings to one another. Will we ever as a unit see the inner beauty in every living thing or will we continue to be repulsed by the stray and lonesome hair which spoils perfection?
Maverick
In Oscar’s Shadow Michael Hanley takes a look at the Academy Awards and asks “Do they always get it right?” The 80th Academy Awards took place after all on February 24th, with the contentious screen writers strike finally brought to an end, just in time to commemorate what has been by most accounts a pretty good year for films. The awards ceremony was largely monopolised by the brothers Joel and Ethan Coen, whose ominous thriller No Country for Old Men picked up the prestigious Best Picture Oscar, in addition to the Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Director gongs . With Daniel Day-Lewis rounding off the big winners in taking home his second Best Actor Award for his performance in Paul Thomas Anderson’s frontier epic There Will Be Blood, there was little controversy over the distribution of the Oscars this year. But has that always been the case? A quick glance at recent Academy Award winners seems to throw up more than a few “Did that really win?” moments. Although one’s initial reaction to the Academy’s celebration of a mediocre film here and there might be to brush it off, remember that the awards are given out after careful and detailed scrutiny carried out by experienced professionals with a specific task of reviewing and judging films. To be bestowed with an Academy Award is to receive the highest possible honour within the global film industry, and can be worth hundreds of millions in box
office takings and DVD sales. When Pélé was crowned ‘Athlete of the Century’ by the International Olympic Committee in 1999, did the masses rise up in dissent, declare their unbridled disgust, and participate in crazed rioting on the streets in a show of insubordination towards the scandalous decision? And how often is the Nobel Prize given out based on personal affection, nostalgia, or one’s status as a popular celebrity? Widely regarded as a cinematic masterpiece, Orson Welles’ Citizen Kane was booed whenever it was mentioned during the 1941 Oscar ceremony, due to the eponymous protagonist’s unflattering similarities with real-life media mogul William Randolph Hearst, who repeatedly attempted to have the film banned. Too controversial to achieve mainstream acclaim in its day, Kane was beaten to the Best Picture award by John Ford’s inferior drama How Green Was My Valley? Ironically, Ford was to experience Welles’ disappointment himself 15 years later in 1956, when the Academy bestowed the Best Picture prize upon Michael Anderson’s indulgent, threehours plus adaptation of Jules Verne’s novel Around the World in 80 Days. After the rebirth of Hollywood in the 1960s, and the emergence of a new generation of filmmaking talent including Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorsese, Francis Ford Coppola, Brian de Palma, and George Lucas, the Academy Awards became even more out of touch with the tastes of the film going public. Upon the rebirth of American cinema in the late 1960s and the increasing presence of pop culture references in cinema, films such as Bonnie and Clyde (Arthur Penn) and The Graduate (Mike Nichols) could still be overlooked by the Academy… in the same year! The 1967 Best Picture award went to Norman Jewison’s detective thriller In the Heat of the Night.
More peculiar, however, was the 1980 preference of Robert Redford’s directorial debut Ordinary People to Martin Scorsese’s superb biopic Raging Bull, a film that combined excellent cinematography, innovative camera work and an astonishing lead performance from Robert de Niro.
A quick glance at recent Academy Award winners seems to throw up more than a few “Did that really win?” moments
Twenty eight years of hindsight seems to have resulted in the consensus view amongst critics that Scorsese was indeed robbed, as Raging Bull’s legendary status increases year after year. And for many, Kevin Costner’s Dances with Wolves will always pale in comparison to its defeated rival for the 1990 Best Picture, Goodfellas (the second occasion that Scorsese was to lose out
11
to a first-time director). The 1990s marked a period when the Academy couldn’t find a worthy winner of the best film prize no matter how obvious the correct choice was. 1994 saw Robert Zemeckis’ allAmerican melodrama Forrest Gump defeat two of the greatest films ever made, in Quentin Tarantino’s postmodernist landmark, Pulp Fiction, and Frank Darabont’s inspirational Stephen King adaptation The Shawshank Redemption. The Coen brothers would have received their second Best Picture award this year had their 1996 cult hit Fargo not been shamefully ignored in favour of sentimental war drama The English Patient. James Cameron’s Titanic may well go down as one of the most overrated films in history, but that will be scant consolation to Curtis Hanson, who must have been surprised to see his modern noir feature L.A. Confidential lose out on Oscar night in 1997. 1998 proved to be the worst year yet for the credibility-free zone known as the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, as John Madden’s nonsensical rom-com Shakespeare in Love beat Steven Spielberg’s WWII classic Saving Private Ryan to the top prize. At this stage, people could be forgiven for beginning to suspect some kind of corrupt force influencing the distribution of the awards. Three consecutive years of awful decisions were absolved somewhat after the Best Picture prize announcement in 1999, which went to Sam Mendes’ American Beauty. Then again, it would have been hard to go wrong in a year that saw the release of The Green Mile, The Insider and The Sixth Sense. So although the Academy got it right in 2008, there remains no doubt that the Oscars represent only the personal opinions of an elite and select few. It is well worth remembering not to judge a film by its Oscar-laden back cover.
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Maverick
The Honest Answer Irish Independent journalist Ian O’Doherty speaks candidly with Raymond Groarke How did you manage to get into journalism? When I was 15, I interviewed Hotpress magazine editor, Niall Stokes; He gave me an album to review, The Shouting Stage by Joan Armatrading. I gave it a terrible review and it all started there.
What pisses you off the most? Hypocrisy! People who go with the flow and keep their head down. I can’t stand people who run with the herd, it really annoys me.
In Irish society, are people too quick to be offended? Absolutely. Political correctness has gone mad, but the ironic thing is that political correctness is brilliant material for satire. What offending a person actually does is challenge them to defend their own beliefs.
Who is your idol and why? Bill Hicks. I saw him perform in the Tivoli theatre in the 90’s and it was the best show I’ve ever seen. It was nothing like I’d ever seen or heard before, he just brought it to a new level; he’s the only comedian I’d call a genius, he was brilliant.
When interviewing somebody, what’s the funniest thing you have ever done?
Blogging allows everybody to become a journalist. Do you think this is a good thing or a bad thing?
I was interviewing Michael Bolton, the singer, in London and he had just got his long hair cut. Before the interview, some little obnoxious agent came up to me and told me I couldn’t talk to him about his hair, as he was unhappy with it, or about his romance with Nicolette Sheridan. (Edie from Desperate Housewives) The first thing I asked him was what did Nicolette think of his hair? It was the shortest interview I’ve ever done.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, we all know that. Some blogs I love, and in reality, some bloggers are better writers than some journalists, but I don’t fear that. I’m not afraid of the competition they present, but some journalists are; they’re afraid some underlying weakness of their own might be exposed. Some blog sites say I’m a left-wing Liberal when others call me a rightwing Nazi. I’m thinking, ‘make up
Sanctuary for the Famous Caitriona Rocheford talks about why the rich and famous are drawn to the quiet tranquility of County Wicklow. When Oscar winner, Daniel Day Lewis was seen enjoying a pint of Guinness in his favourite local pub
Ian relaxing at home in South Dublin
nestled in the Wicklow Mountains, people all thought the same thing. ‘Quite the unexpected choice of location for such a famous celebrity to indulge.’ The Roundwood Inn is located in a little quiet corner of Co.Wicklow. This quiet and relaxing pub attracts all kinds of people, from the locals to Michael Jackson and has become a celebrity magnet over time. The surrounding areas of Roundwood include places such as Glendalough, Laragh, Lough Dan and Annamoe. Annamoe is a very popular location for many actors, managers, musicians and chefs to live
in. It is a very small village with 200 residents but has been labelled by many onlookers ‘The Hollywood of Ireland. Superstar Daniel Day Lewis lives in Annamoe on his 100-acre estate with his wife Rebecca Miller and their two children. When Day Lewis is not filming he enjoys maintaining his fitness regime and is often spotted running the roads and also takes part in marathons in the area. He is described by locals as friendly and down to earth and lives just across the valley from John Boorman. Boorman, film director of The General and Excalibur lives in the nearby Glendalough Estate, in a beautiful country house along the Avonmore River with his 3 youngest children and wife Isabella. Roundwood and Annamoe have a peaceful entity that attracts celebrities to its absolute tranquillity that they so badly need. Though the countryside may not appeal to all, some have claimed that “If Killiney or Dalkey are all about porches and Prada suits, then Roundwood and Annamoe are all about Range Rovers and macs”. Luggala House, costing approximately ?30,000 a week to rent was home to Michael Jackson for a short time in 2005. It was also alleged that Tiger Woods stayed at the location
your mind lads.’
Who is the worst person you have ever interviewed? Alan Hansen. I interviewed him and John Aldridge a few years ago; who I have to say was a lovely man. But Alan Hansen didn’t even pretend he wanted to be involved, and it was a paid gig for him. What an absolute bastard.
What would be your advice to budding journaliststs? Don’t ever take ‘NO’ for an answer and don’t ever listen to PR - they are not your friends!
last year with his wife while playing golf at The K Club Co. Kildare. Paul McGuinness, U2 manager equally as low key to his celebrity neighbours, lives at Avonmore House and Estate with his wife Kathy Gilfillan and their two children Alexandra and Max. Who said that this town was missing some rock and roll! This estate was originally owned by Ireland’s 4th President Erskine Childers and since many celebrities such as Angelica Houston, Aidan Quinn & Julia Roberts have gone on to lives in the beautiful Georgian house. Still, The Roundwood Inn remains the biggest celebrity magnet of all, winning ‘The Pub of the Year 2007’. It welcomes anyone from Joe Public to Dawn French, Lenny Henry, Jamie Lee-Curtis and Robin O Reilly, daughter in-law of Independent News & Media Sir Anthony O’ Reilly. It is the very ordinariness of those within the area that make Roundwood and the breath-taking countryside such a celebrity land. It allows very successful actors, poets, managers and dramatists to adjust to levels of the common man. It is home to the famous, where they can unwind and become just another local at the bar!
Maverick
13
The Facts of Life… In North Carolina, it is illegal for cats and dogs to fight. In Miami it is forbidden to imitate an animal. A pigs orgasm lasts for up to 30 minutes.(In my next life I want to be a pig!) Some Lions mate over 50 times a day.(I still fancy myself as a pig…I value quality over quantity!) In Finland, Donald Duck comics were banned for a brief time because he doesn’t wear pants! A mans beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex. The first couple to ever be shown on prime-time television was Fred and Wilma Flintstone. There are NO clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos. One human hair can support up to 6.5 pounds in weight. Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, but only in tropical fish stores. LF
Something For The Weekend...
The Palace
Eden Meeting house square Dublin 2, 6705372
84-87 Lower Camden Street, Dublin 2, 4780808
After rucking our way past the
potatoes. Only your aul’ granny
Stumbling across from the queue
But if you’re in search of the
horde of smokers blocking the
will serve better mash. Chocolate
outside Coppers, my drinking bud-
proverbial Mad One, the down-
entrance, we made it inside and
lovers’ hearts will explodewhen
dies challenged me to a game of
stairs nightclub is where you wanna
asked has a blizzard hit this place?
they taste the hot chocolate fon-
pool upstairs in the palace. I was
be. The bouncers don’t exercise the
White tables, chairs and uniforms.
dant, served with flaky wafers and
already spending money I didn’t
boot of the law as many other
After a mishap with the starter we
crunchy pralines. Superb.
have and was sure they were a lot
places do and the music has all the
were given complimentary cocktails
Customers dine in close proximity
dizzier than I was, so in we stum-
cheese of your sister’s record collec-
by a rather over enthusiastic wait-
so you may risk hearing the sexual
bled. Compared to the thumping
tion. No one will judge you if you
ress who seemed a little too happy
exploits of a rather wrinkly 55 year
madness downstairs, the Pool Hall
sing at the top of your voice while
with her present employment situa-
old architect in the back of his
is relaxed and fun. It’s open late
air guitaring to livin’ on a prayer or
tion. As far as the food goes, it was
Merc if your table falls silent.
every night. You’ll often see
Summer of 69 (We’ve all done it!)
hard to fault; the chicken liver ter-
When Summer arrives, book a
bands/DJs hanging out with a pint
Head in early my friends; by half
rine was smooth and buzzing with
table for a movie screening in
after their gigs. There are plenty of
twelve the Palace is a thick congeal-
flavour, the pan fried duck was per-
meeting square; it makes for a nice
sofas for the over 30’s crowd or the
ing swamp of drunkards. I’ll be the
fectly cooked; tender succulent and
change from the old battered UCI.
annoyingly inebriated companion
chap who just lost all his money.
RG
who just can’t soldier on anymore.
RG
served with creamy dauphinoise
14
Maverick
This summer soccer fanatics will be treated to 22 days of action with Euro 2008 kicking off. Keith Nutley previews the teams to watch ... With Ireland’s crème de la crème of international football looking towards the qualifications for South Africa, the best of Europe will be looking forward to Toblerones and indulging in Austrian chocolate in this summer’s European Championships in Switzerland and Austria. The biggest international European football competition begins in June without any of the so called “home nations”. This means that we will have to do without the traditional English collapse come quarter final stage. Maybe this is a good thing as we can now watch this tournament without the English hysteria that surrounds most sporting events in which they compete. So who are the main contenders for Greece’s crown?
The Usual Suspects:
The World champions will be hot favourites to hold both the World and European title at the same time, but only if they escape the group of death. They are grouped with France, Netherlands and the unfortunate Romanians. For the neutral, this means an early renewal of rivalries and a rematch of the World Cup final as Italy take on France on the 17th of June. With Nesta and Buffon starring in their back five, Gattuso and Pirlo commanding midfield, and the sublime Luca Toni up front, Italy may come out victorious.
The French will make the short journey to Austria full of the trademark swagger that has served them well in recent tournaments. The ageing French argument is no longer valid, as they now have some exciting young players to watch out for, namely Frank Ribery (Bayern Munich) and Karim Benzema (Lyon). However, it is in defence in that their big weakness lies. Gone are the days of Laurent Blanc, replaced
by Jean Alain Boumsong. The French will be like a new Ferrari with no engine; attractive but ineffective.
The Germans, like the French, won’t be suffering from jetlag as they pop next door for what could be their biggest chance of success since their World Cup victory in 1990. Their impressive performance in World Cup 2006 will boost their confidence and with players like Klose, Bastien Schweinsteiger, and Philip Lahm, they have a working core and solid foundation to push to European glory.
Along with the Germans, the Portuguese will be the most likely to achieve European brilliance. In “Big Phil” Scolari, they have a manager who knows what it takes to win an international tournament. Their current squad still contains many of the players that featured in their runner-up performance in Greece four years ago. And with players on form such as Barcelona’s Deco and Manchester United’s Cristiano Ronaldo, Portugal’s flair might just be too hot to handle.
The perennial non-performers of international football will be looking to cast aside that tag, and on paper, there is no reason why they can’t. Undoubtedly, they have the players. Torres, Alonso, Fabregas, and Puyol means they have the sturdiness and firepower to scare any team. However, they do have problems. Their potential expulsion from the tournament due to governmental interference will probably amount to
Cristino Ronaldo will be one of the main threats at Euro 2008 nothing but could disrupt their preparations. Expect the ‘same old, same old’ from the Spaniards.
Marco Van Basten has taken drastic steps in getting his country this far, including dropping goal poacher extraordinaire, Ruud Van Nistelrooy. There are mixed feelings about him when it comes to his man-management skills and the jury is still out on his team’s chances this summer. With two semi-final appearances in the past two competitions, they do have a good pedigree and with the re-emergence of Robben at Madrid they could cause teams problems but are placed in a tough group. There are still other teams that are worth a mention, so before you Croats and Greeks out there start
writing-in, here they are: Croatia, who have knocked-out England in the qualifiers, will be looking to recreate their 1998 World Cup form, but without Eduardo of Arsenal, they could find goals hard to come by. That leaves a number of teams, including defending champions Greece, Sweden, Czech Republic, Russia, Turkey and Poland. While one of these might put up a spirited battle, a semi-final spot is the best they should hope for, while you can disregard Romania and co-hosts Austria and Switzerland.
Maverick Prediction:
Ger ma ny
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Maverick
Arrivederci e Grazie Trapattoni Maverick sends Keith Nutley into the future to see how well Ireland performs under Giovanni Trapattoni. The days of explosive interviews, assault charges, and sublime results from our adopted Italian godfather are over. In an emotional speech outside the GPO to a heaving O’Connell Street, Giovanni Trapattoni declared he was to retire to Inis Mór, off the west coast of Ireland to live his dream life of seclusion and privacy. In an address reminiscent of Margaret Thatcher’s upon leaving Downing Street, the most successful Irish manager of all time declared to his adoring public that after reaching the World Cup final, he was not to return to management. Through teary eyes, he spoke in perfect Englishish and admitted: “Managing another team now would be like cheating on a super-model with a low class hooker”. The mourning crowd were not your typical flag-waving, namechanting brigade we have come to expect. Instead, the air around the capital was filled with a sense of loss. This man in the last two years has given fans more joy than the government’s recent 24-hour pub law. Standing where Pádraig Pearse stood whilst reading out Poblacht Na hÉireann, he poured out his heart to the Irish public.
“Managing another team now would be like cheating on a super-model with a low class hooker” It was a mere eleven months ago, after a forgettable Ireland v Croatia friendly match in Split, which led to the Irish gaffer attacking Tony O’Donoghue of RTE. Trapattoni decided to play eleven Eircom League players and to recognise Drogheda’s magnificent achievement in reaching the Champions League group stages. Ireland lost 21, and it was put to Mr. Trapattoni that this was not the best preparation for the upcoming World Cup in
South Africa. This sparked a vicious exchange of words between the two and led to the Italian barraging the sports reporter with his 70-year-old fists. This led to a court case, which RTE won. Sporting chat shows, Gerry Ryan, Joe Duffy and even The Late Late Show were used as platforms for the ‘PC’ side of Ireland to denounce Giovanni Trapattoni as a bully and in the words of Eamon Dunphy, “a withering old thug.” They say time is a healer and it’s also a very good amnesiac. Once ‘Tonygate’ had occurred, people quickly forgot the nights in Croke Park and the one amazing night in Rome. People disregarded Ireland’s demolition of Bulgaria in Croke Park, and cast aside their memories of Aiden McGeady’s hat-trick in the Stadio Olympico to beat the Azzurri 3-2 and top the group. “I may have brought success to your land, but you have brought humility and kindness to my heart. Your love for calcio has reignited this old man’s love for life and I cannot wait to spend my summers in Ireland living the life of the Irish.” Nothing is going to spoil this moment, even the weather is paying its respect. The millionaire players that sit behind Trapattoni are lacking the glazed look that is all too common in footballer’s faces. Instead, they listen to his outpouring of emotion as if it is their father explaining why he is leaving their mother but how he will always love his children. At this point, many of the players are trying miserably to hold back their own sincere and heartfelt tears. They were expecting the usual post-World Cup get-together many had attended in the Phoenix Park in 2002; instead, they are faced with an emotional declaration. Robbie Keane, who has just won the Golden Boot for a record-breaking 12 goals in the World Cup, was consoled by Richard Dunne, who scored the dramatic last-minute winner against Brazil in the Quarter Final. Shay Given, who saved Cristiano Ronaldo’s penalty in the semi-final shoot-out, is staring at the ground, whilst beside him sits Aiden McGeady, who scored the decisive penalty to put Ireland through to the World Cup Final against Argentina. The most striking image, however, is the sight of Stephen Ireland, the player who won man of the match in
Fans sad at Trapattoni exit the World Cup Final despite losing to a wonder goal by Lionel Messi, who has his head buried in his hands. “The best tribute you can pay me now is to move from strength to strength and establish yourselves as a football superpower. I want to see Ireland contest European Championships and World Cups for years to come. People of Ireland, my love will always be with you.” “Forza Irlande e go raibh míle maith agat!” This sparks the loudest noise
O’Connell Street has heard since the bombs and gunshots of 1916. Tricolours, both green white and orange, and green white and red, fill the street’s air. Flares light up the sky. Never have two footballing cultures collided and synchronised so well. Daniel O’Connell wears a cape that reads: “You gave us passion and success, we give you thanks.” And a huge banner emerges from the crowd, enveloping hundreds of rapturous Irish fans, and it reads: “Arrivederci e Grazie Mr Trapattoni”.