This book was published as part of the Wellington Literary Magazine class. Cover Image by Sohavi Nonstavo Created by Adobe Spark premium and Google Docs Published using Impact and Arial font.
Table of Contents
Era------------------------------------------------------------------------1 In The Meantime-----------------------------------------------------2 Do Not Disturb--------------------------------------------------------3 Thug Cry---------------------------------------------------------------4 Wrinkled Images---------------------------------------------------5 Functional Statements-------------------------------------------7 The Desires in my Heart Began to Die Off-------------------8 One of Those Nights----------------------------------------------9 Pain------------------------------------------------------------------10 Stressed-----------------------------------------------------------12
ERA “You’re not from this era,”they said. Now, I don’t take that as a compliment. I never knew what you saw in me. This era took me in, but I vow to be different. I just put all my feelings in this paper. It’s not a sad feeling, it’s time. It takes time, it will be fine It’s not much like me anymore. Self-centered but ready to explore. I don’t even know anymore. I don’t feel like a good writer. My options are closing while others get wider. I stand and just look in the mirror, and just realize I’m not from this era. I realize it doesn’t have to end here. I can pursue in everything and anything I want, but will I be successful in such a career. Football being popular is all they want to hear. But it’s much deeper than that not being successful is my biggest fear. Knowing that my adulthood is near. Maybe I am from this era, but just a different tier.
1
In The Meantime The world is yours Never understood the meaning One second I’m happy Next my heart is leaning The word life what is the meaning Going through the same basis of life Reaching for the goals that never seemed to be reachable Overwhelming myself With physical pain With my heart critically stained Not even the storm nor the rain Can make you understand my pain
2
Do Not Disturb I’m screaming to you Silently your smile fills the room wraps my heart with shackles and I continue yelling and the room gets brighter your voice compliments my ears until my screams wear off all of my energy disassembled And I slam the door Silently
3
Thug Cry That first tear drop of 2020 has been held Now living check by check hasn’t changed I mean daddy still have to thug it out for me I know you stuck living in poverty Daddy you ain’t been seen around much You there every now and then Every time i see you it seems you in a rush Seeing your only son dead left your heart crushed Observing from the skies of heaven lord I never once saw you cry ,no shock Tears never been shown somewhere in a lock Safely held where no thug should ever be seen Watching you cry would be the last of me It was a image that decently scrapped my memory Day by day year by year can’t y’all see? How he showed the love he had for me Staying strong holding his tears he said was for me But once again something somehow I could never see I learned you never came to my funeral daddy, why? Knowing you never got to say your true bye “Son I never came to your funeral because I didn’t want you to see me cry”
4
Wrinkled Images
Define what you know of me How you believe what you see And how you quickly create an image of me Not understanding what I can one day be But that's just what you were taught I see These Wrinkled Images are repeated in your head How you can learn and meet me but judge instead Is my soul really that dark then why is my favorite color red How I affect the community but then again that's something you said You think you can judge me our connection is as strong as a thread But don’t worry, the best of these words have yet been said Why stress over so much about how I look? Trust me you won’t learn about me over just a book My freedom and courage is what you took The wrinkled image you created left the world shook You won’t find this in a U.S history book
5
Is it me or the skin color you truly fear? Even though we're all living on this colorful sphere The wrinkled image stabbed me but who’s the spear? Is this what you wanted me believing the end is near? And after everything you’ve done nothing, after everything Not even a tear Oh you thought I wanted sympathy I just wanted your thoughts simply Is there something wrong with me Or is it the way I carry myself Must be something you really see No just the wrinkled images you seemed to link to me I see
6
Functional Statements
Behavior of mine being criticized on the daily Living life so crazy yet so shady Understand what I’m up against never cared When he told me put your hands up I stopped I stared My police run in I never thought I shared It was an early morning kids probably still snoring His deep voice steady roarin The flashlight in my eyes my mind goes the soaring Inevitable his words he spoke to me The shock that controlled my body Lead to my whisper which was softly “Get on the ground” he said abruptly My police run in. I'm not ready to share.
7
The Desires in my Heart Began to Die Off This pain I feel right now I told myself no more No more struggling to believe to believe that a girl wants me for me Just the desire to have that girl that girl in my arms just for the comfort purpose To hold her hand as if we were magnetically attracted together These desires lifted my imagination I proceeded Proceeded with a new meaning of a new desire this pain that I feel right now is non existent maybe that certain girl I desire just happens to also be nonexistent but this desire for her began to die die off as i grew Matured and this pain I feel I feel no more.
 8
One of Those Nights The darkness has spread so have my tears This long road home is the worst How losing you to someone else was one of my fears But I made a strong turn and my tires decided to burst And with a truck full of opened cans of beers This night has turned for the worst But I drove to keep you off my mind Going 80 in a 50 I was losing control Me losing you was just a sign I gained control as soon as I hit a pole One of those nights I don’t want to remember But sadly it's one of those nights that are stuck It was the night where I became a member The way my body was laying inside the truck It was a night she regret they say That night it was the last she saw of me She comes weekly where my body now stay It was one of those nights that she never got to see
9
Pain Through the storm it’s his pain his only pain everlasting at most the suffering figure finds himself through the pain he feels as his heart seems to feel nothing but overload of emotions that runs through his stomach is he lost or suffering? Running away from his problems Where does he solve such issues? Is it by his unconditional love? Or the man in the sky above Painted pictures captured The ones he saw on his own walls appeared Elevated screams in his inner thoughts Where does the pain go?
10
Sustaining happiness between him and himself Seems to be unnatural Happiness seems to be unreal His heart seems to be faker than real He cries the pain over runs his thoughts His inner peace that was once there
11
Stressed Class of 2020 your valedictorian is... Not me Not once have I ever thought it would be me All this hard work I put just to be average I’m stressed I’m ridiculed on how I need betters grades All A’s Something that I just can’t do Sleep deprived at best is what I call it Expect us to be all this When I can barely be me My life is cloudy The future I can’t even see Once known as Mr. rowdy Is now something I could never be I’m growing But it’s scary How soon I might have to marry How love is almost here but I can’t get an A in math How soon I’ll have pay for my own water bill to take a simple bath Class of 2020 your valedictorian... Probably was raised to lead Probably was born as a smart seed Probably out the womb was taught to read
12
Class of 2020 ...I’m stressed Don’t even feel blessed I don’t feel different I just feel like the rest.
13
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