Westender April 14 2016 by Westender

APRIL 14-20 // 2016

EVERYTHING VANCOUVER

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Spring style

• THE FINE ART OF INTERIOR DESIGN • • VANCOUVER STYLISTS SPILL SPRING SECRETS• • THE AVANT-GARDE WEIRDNESS OF THE RESIDENTS • NEWS // ISSUES • STYLE // DESIGN • EAT // DRINK • MUSIC // ARTS • FILM // TV • HEALTH // SEX

NEWS // ISSUES

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INSIDE THIS WEEK

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News3 Vancouver Shakedown3 Science Matters3 Cover Story4 Style File4 A Good Chick To Know5 Nosh7 Fresh Sheet7 The Growler8 By The Bottle10 Music11 What’s On12 Arts14 Reel People16 Real Estate17 Whole Nourishment20 Horoscopes21 Sex with Mish Way21 Classifieds22 COVER: ARTIST MARKELLA MILDENBERGER TURNS HER PAINTINGS INTO WALLPAPER AND FABRIC. DAN TOULGOET PHOTO

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You’re All Just Jealous of My Jetpack by Tom Gauld

RANT//RAVE email: rantrave@westender.com ALL RANTS ARE THE OPINION OF THE INDIVIDUAL AND DO NOT REFLECT THE OPINIONS OF THE WESTENDER. THE EDITOR RESERVES THE RIGHT TO EDIT FOR CLARITY AND BREVITY, SO PLEASE KEEP IT SHORT AND (BITTER)SWEET.

NEWSFLASH: YOU DON’T OWN THE SIDEWALK

To the young man who, walking with his girlfriend, intentionally knocked into me at the side entrance of the Denman Mall – were you so offended by the fact that I unintentionally crossed your path (without touching you), that you felt it appropriate to intentionally hit me with your shoulder?When I asked why you bumped me, you said it was because I had walked in

ADULT/PARENT PASS

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2 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

front of you. I explained that I hadn’t seen you. Did you consider that I (a woman probably old enough to be your grandmother) might have been dealing with a physical limitation? Is retaliation for imagined slights your way of operating in the world? The sidewalk, and for that matter, the world, isn’t there to serve only you. Time to curb your sense of entitlement and show some consideration for others. As for your girlfriend, I fear that she,

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too, may at some point have to bear the physical brunt of your self-absorption. –Long-timeWest End resident

BE AN ALLY, NOT A BYSTANDER

Today I would like to call out to my fantastically wonderful male friends who could be doing an even better job in their efforts to create a safer world for their fantastic female friends/partners/lovers/colleagues/neighbours/

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classmates/sisters/daughters/ mothers/etc. I have now heard too many stories of men witnessing other men do questionable acts (from Jian to my college dorm) that can, do, and will lead to relationally and physically violent acts upon women’s bodies and souls.Want to move from bystander to ally? Speak up and inﬂuence the questionable acts you witness of other men.They’re happening all of the time. Apparently, once a woman gets the unbelievable courage to step up and speak out on the stand, it’s too late and more violence is done upon her. Step up yourselves, because I’m much too tired of women carrying this burden.While certain types of criminal acts play out fairly in the courts – real justice happens via relationships, via the daily, up close and personal moments in our lives. Have you witnessed another man speak/touch/pursue a woman in such a manner that violates your ethics as a human being? Do what you need to do in your power to change it. As a human being living on this earth, on this day, at this time, under these circumstances, it’s your responsibility too. -Carys

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NEWS // ISSUES

@WESTENDERVAN

YOUR CITY CITY SHORTS // CITY LOOKS AT BLOCKING ROBSON OFF PERMANENTLY

There’s so few single men in Vancouver, even dating shows are having a hard time finding any. First Dates photo

Calling all single men! Grant Lawrence Vancouver Shakedown @GrantLawrence

It might sound like a Vancouver cliché, but just like single-family-homes, there appears to be a shortage of single-available-hommes in this town. Case in point: Kristian Olsen, a Vancouver-based TV industry pal, recently approached me with a quandary. He’s a story producer on First Dates (FirstDatesCanada.ca), a reality dating show set here in Vancouver, which airs on the Slice Network. They’ve put forth the call for single men and women to appear on the show, but the producers were perplexed by the results: female applicants greatly outnumber the dudes. Olsen is hastily researching why so few of Vancouver’s single guys appear to be interested or available. He admits that he’s not an expert, but is willing to speculate. “Vancouver’s demographics might be the biggest reason why we are having tough time ﬁnding straight, single men to participate on First Dates. There are a lot of gay men in Vancouver, which takes a lot of males out of the eligibility pool. Also,Tinder has made it so damn easy to get laid that the process of dating – taking someone out for dinner and drinks – has become somewhat antiquated. Someone told us during an audition that there are men who are getting pizza delivered to their home, paid for by women on Tinder! Vancouver women will do anything to stand out!” (When I enquired about contestant eligibility, Olsen told me that besides single straights, anyone from the LGBTQ community is welcome to audition.) The workload of the show entails an initial audition interview, a two-hour dinner date at a typical local restaurant (captured by ﬁxed rigged cameras, so there’s no crew running around to distract you), and a 15-minute exit interview.There’s no pay, but

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the show will at least pick up a portion of your dinner, and you get to be on TV. I had to repeatedly email my single guy friends to get a response. One of them, who I know only as “KirkofDoom”, eventually got back to me: “I completely forgot that you asked me about this. Or maybe I blocked it out. I don’t want to be on the show, because the whole concept of a dating show seems weird and archaic”. I also reached out to solo female friends. Christine, who has been intermittently single in Vancouver for eight years, agrees about the lack of available guys. “It’s a quantity and quality problem in my eyes. A smaller pool of single guys means a smaller amount of quality partners.” Emily, also “footloose” (her term), has a more positive outlook on Vancouver’s apparent lack of single men. “We can’t wait for these gorgeous, interesting guys to drop in our lap. If you see someone you like, anywhere, for goodness sake, SMILE. Seriously, just showing your teeth in public can change your whole dating scene”. How about smiling for the camera? Or is First Dates just a ruse to set you up for a TV train wreck? Olsen responds: “Yes, awkwardness and bad dates are part of the fun of the show, but we don’t set that up deliberately. That’s not fair to the people who genuinely want to ﬁnd love. We actually do have integrity about our match ups.” Moments before my deadline, I received an email back from a friend named Colin. He’s a well-groomed, employed, ﬁt, totally eligible bachelor, who even drives a Mini. He’s game to be on the show. “I’m 34 and single. Why not?” Colin reasons. “I’m a bit of a creature of habit and tend to go to the same places and see the same people, so I might as well take advantage of this.” How about the rest of you single dudes of Vancouver, are you ready for your close-up? Check out FirstDatesCanada.ca for more info W

A short block of Robson Street that is routinely closed to trafﬁc for the summer and turned into a popular pedestrian plaza could be shut down permanently beginning this year. City manager Sadhu Johnston said staff is preparing a report to go to council in either late April or early May that will recommend the 800-block of Robson Street, between Howe and Hornby streets, be closed year-round. “It’s something we’ve been directed by council for a while to work on,” said Johnston. “We want to do it because we think it’s the right thing to do. There’s not that many public gathering places downtown – plazas like that. So we want to create a really nice public spot that people can gather.” Although the stretch of the two-way street is short, Johnston said closing it to vehicle trafﬁc would connect the public spaces at the law courts with the

The city has closed the 800-block of Robson Street to traffic every summer since the 2010 Olympics, but now the pedestrian plaza could be permanent. Mike Howell photo south side of Vancouver Art Gallery, a popular hangout for people, a public protest spot and home to a few food trucks and retail kiosks. The plan to permanently shut down the block to vehicles has been in the works since 2010 when the stretch was closed for the Winter Olympics. Since then, the block has been closed to trafﬁc every year, between June and August. Funky and whimsical furniture for seating and dining was added to the street

during those months. Chris Bryan, a TransLink media relations advisor, said if city council follows through on city staff ’s recommendation and permanently closes the stretch of Robson, then the No. 5 bus will be diverted along Burrard and West Pender streets. (4HD3 B8C3AA0=@;98GF3# Courier

BC LEADS CANADA IN JOB GROWTH

Employment in BC increased 3.2 per cent in the

12 months to March, making the province Canada’s top performer when it comes to job growth over the period. BC gained 72,000 jobs year-over-year in March, helped by an increase of 9,000 positions in the month, according to Statistics Canada data released April 8. March’s gain pushed the province’s unemployment rate down a tick to 6.5 per cent, although the rate is up 0.6 percentage points yearover-year from 5.9 per cent in March 2015, as more people in BC were looking for work. Compared with a year ago, BC has added 39,000 full-time and 33,000 part-time jobs Canada gained 130,000 jobs in the past year, pushing the unemployment rate down to 7.1 per cent. The good news is this gain is solely due to growth of almost 134,000 full-time jobs, which was partially offset by a loss of 4,000 part-time positions. The country gained 41,000 jobs in the month – almost all full-time positions. W (-??@ 1#@C$8#6 B@?%3A0 2G!H;3!! H;=@;98GF3#

Science proves nature calms the brain and heals the body David Suzuki Science Matters @DavidSuzuki

For the most part, our brains didn’t evolve in cities. But in a few decades, almost 70 per cent of the world’s people will live in urban environments. Despite the prosperity we associate with cities, urbanization presents a major health challenge. Cities, with their accelerated pace of life, can be stressful. The results are seen in the brains and behaviour of those raised in cities or currently living in one. On the upside, city dwellers are on average wealthier and receive better health care, nutrition and sanitation than rural residents. On the downside, they experience an increased risk of chronic disease, a more demanding and stressful social environment and greater levels of inequity. In fact, city dwellers have a 21 per cent greater risk for anxiety disorders and a 39 per cent increased likelihood of mood disorders. A study published in Nature links city living with sensitivity to social stress. MRI scans show greater exposure to urban environments can increase activity in the amygdala, a brain structure involved in emotions

such as fear and the release of stress-related hormones. According to the study, the amygdala “has been strongly implicated in anxiety disorders, depression, and other behaviours that are increased in cities, such as violence.” The researchers also found people who lived in cities for their ﬁrst 15 years experienced increased activity in an area of the brain that helps regulate the amygdala. So if you grew up in the city, you’re more likely than those who moved there later in life to have permanently raised sensitivity to stress. Author and professor David Gessner says we’re turning into “fast twitch” animals. It’s like we have an alarm clock going off in our brains every 30 seconds, sapping our ability to concentrate for longer periods of time. The demands of urban life include a constant need to ﬁlter information, dodge distractions and make decisions. We give our brains little time to recover. How do we slow things down? Nature seems to be the answer. Cognitive psychologist David Strayer’s hypothesis is that “being in nature allows the prefrontal cortex, the brain’s command centre, to dial down and rest, like an overused muscle.” Research shows even brief interactions with nature can

soothe our brains. Stanford’s Gregory Bratman designed an experiment in which participants took a 50-minute walk in either a natural or an urban environment. People who took the nature walk experienced decreased anxiety, brooding and negative emotion and increased memory performance. Bratman’s team found walking in natural environments can decrease rumination, the unhealthy but familiar habit of thinking over and over about causes and consequences of negative experiences. Their study also showed neural activity in an area of the brain linked to risk for mental illness was reduced in participants who walked through nature compared with those who walked through an urban environment. Korean researchers investigated the differences in brain activity when volunteers just looked at urban versus natural scenery. For those viewing urban images, MRI scans showed increased blood ﬂow to the amygdala region. In contrast, areas of the brain associated with empathy and altruism lit up for those who viewed natural scenes. In Japan, scientists found people spending time in nature – shinrin-yoku or “forest bathing” – inhale “beneﬁcial bacteria, plant-

derived essential oils and negatively-charged ions” which interact with gut bacteria to strengthen the body’s immune system and improve both mental and physical health. Spending time in nature regularly is not a panacea for mental health but it’s an essential component of health and psychological resilience. Nature helps us withstand and recover from life’s challenges. Even city dwellers can ﬁnd nearby nature – a garden, local park or trail – to give their overworked brains a break. Every spring, the David Suzuki Foundation challenges Canadians to spend more time outside for health and mental well-being. The 30×30 Nature Challenge asks people to commit to spending at least 30 minutes a day in nature for 30 days in May. When you take the 30×30 pledge at 30x30.DavidSuzuki.org, you’ll receive the latest research on the health beneﬁts of spending time outdoors along with practical tips on how to add green time to your daily routine. Let’s show our brains – and bodies – some love. Get outside! W & /@FH6 EG'GDH H! @ !9H3;IH!I0 <#8@69@!I3#0 @GIJ8# @;6 98. $8G;63# 8$ IJ3 /@FH6 EG'GDH +8G;6@IH8;, 73@#; ?8#3 @I /@FH6EG'GDH,8#",

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STYLE // DESIGN

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SPRING STYLE

Spring fashion do’s and don’ts

Tips from some of Vancouver’s bestdressed locals Niki Hope Style File

@NikiMHope Vancouver stylists Nadia Albano, Jason Pillay, and Nathalie Rees recently took part in Eco Fashion Week’s Value Village thrift challenge, where each stylist gets $500 to come up with runway-worthy looks for a fashion show. Now, they talk spring fashion, shopping, closet staples, and whatever else is on their mind this season.

NADIA ALBANO

This is a woman who wears lots of hats, stylish ones, of course. Albano is a stylist, makeup artist, hair stylist, media personality, and is the owner and operator of Nadia Albano Style Inc., a boutique studio in Kitsilano. How would you define your style? Casual chic. Where do you like to shop in Vancouver? I like to shop at many different places and enjoy mixing designer wear with mainstream and vintage/ second-hand fashions. Holt Renfrew, Club Monaco, Zara, Winners,The Bay and Value Village.

Three favourite pieces in your wardrobe? My red Alexander Wang bag, black leather jacket, white Converse sneakers (and my Sophia Webster Heels!).

to trends, but I don’t necessarily follow them. In my line of work, I have to be aware, but I like to create my own unique looks, and then it turns into a trend for myself.

What are you excited to wear for spring/summer? I’m excited to wear white! I think white makes everything pop and looks so chic. I love wearing white-on-white and layering a white blazer with pretty much anything. I also like white eyelet fabric, it looks delicate and perfect for both spring and summer seasons.

Biggest style mistake you see people make? I hope I don’t offend anyone, but personally I don’t like when men wear dress pants that are too short for them. Sometimes I think they are unaware.There are a couple other things: improper ﬁts, bling overload (I do it, within reason), and getting too creative with tights.

Do you follow trends? I always have my eyes on the latest trends, as I think it’s important to stay relevant, but I don’t necessarily follow them. I say, wear what you love and love what you wear.

Style heroes? Olivier Rousteing and Jeremy Scott.

Favourite local designer? I really admire Jason Matlo and Manuel Mendoza. Both really know how to dress a woman’s body and both design gorgeous bridal collections. For custom statement jewelry, I always wear Elsa Corsi, and for my subtle and classic everyday accessories, I love Leah Alexander. Biggest style mistakes you see people make? I created a style rule called S.A.S.S: Shop According to your Style and Silhouette. I sometimes see beautiful women, of all shapes and sizes, wearing ill ﬁtting clothing and it pains me. I believe that when you wear

Clockwise from top left: Stylists Jason Pillay, Nathalie Rees and Nadia Albano. clothing that fits your body it can enhance your body shape and, more importantly, your confidence. Style heroes? I have so many! I’ve always been drawn to Sofia Lauren’s beauty and style, and my modern style heroes would have to be Nicole Richie, Olivia Palmero, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen and Jennifer Lopez. What spring trends should people embrace? I really love florals, patterned patchwork and fringe details.They all add a little personality to an outfit. Denim is a must, as is a pop of color.

Which should they avoid? I would avoid the paper-bag trousers trend. I think this cut does not work for the majority of women.

JASON PILLAY

Stylist Jason Pillay studied fashion business and creative arts and has an unremitting devotion to supporting the local fashion scene.The busy style-maker also works in the costume department of Vancouver’s thriving ﬁlm industry. Where do you like to shop in Vancouver? I don’t have speciﬁc stores I go to, but I love shopping at all sorts of

places. It can range from the boutiques in Gastown, to secondhand stores, to mainstream retailers. Three favourite pieces in your wardrobe? Currently, it’s my beige trench coat, black combat boots, and super skinny jeans. I’m doing this basic beige trend right now. What are you excited to wear for spring/summer? I love wearing colour.Tanks, lots of white, neon colours, etc. I’m also really into sunglasses, so I enjoy wearing all sorts of styles. Do you follow trends? Somewhat. I do pay attention

What spring trends should people embrace? Colors, prints, stripes.

NATHALIE REES

Public relations and style expert Nathalie Rees has worked with top retail brands, such as Westbeach, lifestyle apparel giant lululemon athletica, and successful e-commerce start up Indochino Apparel. She has also worked as stylist for local brand marketing shoots, as well as a wardrobe stylist for some of Vancouver’s most recognizable sports media. How would you define your style? Classic and feminine, but with a West Coast laidback feel.

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Seven easy wardrobe updates for spring 1

NIKI HOPE @nikimhope

It’s spring, a time to revamp that dank winter wardrobe with some fresh new quality pieces. Be bold and reach for those statement earrings, stripes, slinky slip dresses, slip-on shoes, and bomber jackets for those cozy nights.

1. OFF-THE-SHOULDER

A festival favourite, datenight staple, easy summer dressing – the off-theshoulder look made its way down the runways and now it’s popping up everywhere. Aritzia’s Hollande sweet blouse is a darling example of this trend.

2. STRIPES

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Stripes of all sizes and shapes – graphic, colourful, sleeper stripes – are on trend this spring. But the TOPSHOP (at Hudson’s Bay) Moto Stripe oversized cotton shirt ($85) is a brilliant example of how to go for a subtle hit of stripes.

3. STATEMENT EARRINGS

Forget those delicate whispering cuffs and studs, this season’s accessories scream for attention. Vancouver designer Melanie Auld’s multi-crescent earrings ($175) and teardrop earrings with silk tassels attached ($187) are lovely ways to wear this trend.

4. LOOSE-FITTING CROPPED PANT

Check out the De Brauw pant ($110) from Aritzia brand Wilfred Free for an example of the trend that started last year and is only gaining momentum.These wide-leg, high-waisted trousers, inspired by classic sailor pants, are made with a soft denim and pair nicely with the Hollande blouse.

5. SLIP DRESS

The ’90s remain big in fashion, and nothing was bigger in that decade than the slip dress. It’s back, but this time a little more reﬁned,

a little less grunge.The midi-stretch silk slip dress in navy, available at Nordstrom ($420), is an example of a versatile and sleek modern slip dress that can be effortlessly dressed up or down.

6. CHIC SLIP-ONS

Easy, cool, relaxed – the slip-on basically deﬁnes summer.These sophisticated yet simple Palatines slide sandal, available at Charlie & Lee boutique ($298), are handmade in Los Angeles and exemplify the trend beautifully.

7. BOMBER JACKET

A classic that can be worn with shorts in the spring and pants in the fall. Some looks defy trends, and the good-old bomber jacket is one of them. Scoop up this reasonably priced navy blue number from TOPSHOP (at Hudson’s Bay, for $125).The satiny jacket is sure to be a favourite this season and beyond, which are always the best trends to follow anyway. W

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STYLE // DESIGN

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SPRING STYLE Continued from page 4 Where do you like to shop in Vancouver? I love all of the Scoop stores – they carry items that can’t be found anywhere else, but have really reasonable pricing. I also love Simons. I grew up shopping there in Quebec City when I was younger, so I am familiar with their store and their inhouse collections, and was so excited when they opened in West Vancouver.

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Artists find new outlets in home décor

Three local ﬁne artists offer a fresh take on their work Jennifer Scott A Good Chick to Know

@Jennifer_AGCTK ZOE PAWLAK

Zoe Pawlak is internationally recognized for her stunning abstract and figurative works, and well respected as a spokeswoman for the modern creative in public talks for speaker series like PechaKucha. She has not only foraged a path in the creative community for artists and, more specifically, women, she has lead the way for fine artists looking to bring their skill set to a wider audience through a diversified product range. We first saw Pawlak’s work applied to décor in a new way with her collaboration with Burritt Bros. Together they have produced two rug collections since 2013: Over Oceans, which explored scale with one of Pawlak’s abstracts, and most recently, Red Dust, which plays with figurative shapes as pattern. Further exploring the art of collaboration, Pawlak created a line of hard furnishings with local favourite, Jeff Martin Joinery. Using Jeff’s sleek credenzas and casegoods as her canvas, the two work together to bring us a fresh perspective on what a singular piece of furniture can offer to it’s surroundings. We have also seen Pawlak make an artistic statement in the fashion industry. For the Nicole Bridger SS14

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collection, two of Pawlak’s pieces were manipulated to become the pattern basis for the line, aptly entitled Ready for Love. Looking forward for Zoe Pawlak: full speed ahead with product diversity. Keep your eyes out for a sculpture and mirror line, as well as a return to fashion as she is designing the fall collection for Party Skirts. : +@<')F*),(A@E

DANA MOONEY

Makeup-artist-turnedﬁne-artist Dana Mooney has once again branched out to add a new realm to her creativity: home décor. 2015 was a breakout year in terms of brand growth, as Mooney ventured into collaborations with some major local brands to create a diversiﬁed décor lineup with her art that satiates the senses. First up was joining forces with Joue Designs to create a stunning throw pillow collection, allowing her work to become as touchably inviting as it is visually soft; then she was approached by Saje Wellness to design the art of

scent with multiple patterns for their aromatherapy diffusers. Mooney closed out the year with a multidisciplinary visual collaboration with another local talent, Andrew Hibbs of Endeavour Neon – after meeting at IDSWest and a strong push from Kristina Hibbs of Marie Joy Design (Andrew’s wife), the duo created stellar installations that combine the ambience of custom neon light with Mooney’s signature canvas style. What’s next for Mooney? A top secret summer collaboration you won’t want to miss, a show highlighting her paperworks collection and (ﬁngers crossed) further collaborations in both home décor and fashion. : !)C)-@@C<D(A@E

MARKELLA MILDENBERGER

With her artistic roots based in the Okanagan, Markella Mildenberger used her entrepreneurial spirit to build an international business through diversiﬁcation. When The Red Palette

was launched, Mildenberger was selling not only her paintings, but small accessories and jewelry created with her art as well. As she saw the success that a varied product line offered, Mildenberger was inspired to rethink the application of her craft and began to digitally manipulate her paintings in both scale and palette to create custom wallpaper and fabrics. The continued success of the brand brought The Red Palette to Vancouver where designers, private clients and the media were quick to embrace the unique concept, launching Mildenberger into the inner circle of the city’s design community. Since then we have seen her product line further expand to include a recent line of throw pillows using her textiles and, launching by early 2017, a small fashion line, Markella Markella, created from Mildenberger’s art derived textiles that “speaks to both the masculine and feminine qualities of design.” : 93<$<?')*<22<(A@E W

Favourite local designer? I love Karma Athletics. I’m usually hitting the gym at some point during the day, not to mention running around after my one-year-old, so I love that their product is great technically and functionally, but is also very fashion driven.The product is also manufactured here in Vancouver.

Three favourite pieces in your wardrobe? A classic black sleeveless blouse that I just bought from Scoop. I know this will be a staple for me all spring/summer because I can dress it up or down. Denim cut-offs that I bought at a sample sale almost five years ago.They have these little studs on the pockets and are just the right length and fit. My leather jacket. No matter what season or occasion, this jacket ups the cool factor in any look. I wear it with dresses, and I wear it running errands in leggings, a hoodie and running shoes. What are you excited to wear for spring/summer? I am all about the ‘70s-inspired looks this season. I absolutely love all of the off-the-shoulder tops and dresses. It’s very boho/relaxed, but something about the exposure of the shoulders and neck is just so classy and elegant to me. And even though there is a part of me that can’t believe I’ll do it, I can’t wait to get into a pair of super-flared denim. Do you follow trends? I do follow trends, but I think to make a trend work you need to: 1) actually like the trend

and want to incorporate it into your wardrobe, and 2) ﬁnd a way to make it work within your own personal style.

Biggest style mistakes you see people make? I think one of the biggest mistakes you can make is forcing a trend upon your wardrobe. If you’re only wearing it because it’s trendy, then it never works. I also loathe when shorts are worn too small. I always say, when buying shorts, always, always go up a size or even two. Style heroes? I love Jillian Harris! She completely embodies what I believe about style, which is that she incorporates trends, but stays true to her own sense of personal style. And of course, my mom. She taught me everything I know about style and to this day, can still pick out items that I would never have thought of for myself. She bought me a linen blouse from a ﬂower shop once and it’s still one of my go-to items in the summer. What spring trends should people embrace? I always say that people should embrace colours and prints as much as possible in the spring.Trust me, I love my black and white wardrobe staples, but spring is a time to come out of that shell a bit. W

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April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 5

7 NIGHT ALASKA & 3 NIGHT MINI CRUISE

STYLE // DESIGN

SPRING STYLE

Highbrow eyebrows

DAVE FRINTON

Co-Founder & President, CruisePlus

t’s always very convenient to board and return from Canada Place. The Alaska (7 day) runs all summer with some very special offers on early departures – but please ask us about any date (April-September). If a short 3 night getaway (great for new cruisers!) is more up your wavelength (get it, it was a cruise joke?!), then consider our (3 night) extended weekend sailing.

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Cosmetic tattoo artist Shaughnessy Keely on a growing beauty trend KELSEY KLASSEN @kelseyklassen

Facial tattoos aren’t something North Americans really expect to read about in a beauty column, but a certain trend has been raising eyebrows lately. With thin no longer “in,” eyebrow tattooing – a semi-permanent makeup or micropigmentation technique – has become a sought-after alternative to colouring in your over-plucked brows, or to replace hair lost to chemotherapy or illness. We don’t mean those thick, blocky ﬁll-ins of yore, though. Eyebrow tattooing has evolved to use more realistic, 3-D feathering effects over the last few years, as well as offering ink choices that suit your skin tone. And, with the rise of Instagram, it is now easier than ever to covet and connect with beauty techniques from places like Russia, Japan and Korea. You don’t have to travel that far to ﬁnd with one of the world’s most popular cosmetic tattoo artists, though. At 69,000 Instagram followers and counting, Langley-based artist Shaughnessy Keely is so popular, she only opens up her studio website for bookings for one day a month.We joined the queue in March to see what it might be like to try to get in with the “brows-ing”

BEFORE

AFTER

Appointments for Studio Sashiko’s semi-permanent eyebrow tattoos are a hot commodity these days. Contributed photo beauty, whose clients have flown in from as far away as Germany for the $700 treatment, and within seconds of the registration window opening there were 473 people waiting in front of me in line. A former student of Emily Carr University of Art and Design, Keely first mastered her illustration and design skills before moving on to tattooing and body mod – eventually becoming certified in cosmetic tattooing and micropigmentation. In 2015 she opened Studio Sashiko, a boutique, multi-artist tattoo studio (named after a Japanese needlework technique), to specialize in cosmetic tattooing, scalp micropigmentation, hairline reconstruction and eyelash extensions. It’s her eyebrow tattoos that bring the world to her doorstop, though. “I absolutely love creating a new set of brows for someone who has gone through some

form of hair loss,” says Keely. “We have a lot of clients who have alopecia or have gone through chemotherapy in the past and no longer have any eyebrow hair. It’s pretty amazing to see the client light up when they see the ﬁnal result.” She credits Instagram for helping her populate the map in her studio with pins from all over the world. “Once I began my career in tattooing, I started posting before and after photos to showcase my work and it just snowballed from there. I think eyebrow tattooing is something that a lot of people have considered at some point in their life,” she continues, “and through social media they were able to get a better grasp of what it would be like to have it done. It all becomes much more accessible at that point.” W ~ Want to learn more? Head toWestender.com for an extended Q&A.

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Clockwise from top left: Bao Down’s take on pad thai, Same Same But Different; Owners Gregory Edwards and Matthew Adolfo; Murals dominate the interior of Bao Down’s Olympic Village location; The Big Boss grilled beef shortrib; Sizzling pork belly on rice with fried egg and crisp garlic. Dan Toulgoet photos

More hits than misses at Bao Down’s newest location Anya Levykh Nosh

@FoodgirlFriday

BAO DOWN GASTROPUB & RAW BAR

115 West 2nd 604-620-5226 BaoDown.net Open for lunch and dinner daily, 11:30am-2pm and 5pm-10pm; open late Friday-Sunday. When the original Bao Down opened over a year ago in Gastown, I fell for their oversized and ﬂavour-stuffed twists on the traditional bao. Crispy chicken, pillowy bread, lush

Anya Levykh Fresh Sheet

@FoodGirlFriday

Tacofino is expanding its empire, this time into Yaletown. The newest addition is located at 1025 Mainland Street and set to open this June. Expect a counterservice operation with a 40-seat dining room, 16-seat patio and take-out service similar to The Burrito Bar in Gastown. Tacofino.com Pepper Lunch, the popular fast-steak eatery, has opened its first Vancouver location in Cambie Village.The 2,200-square-foot space has 50 seats and a private mezzanine.The DIY-sizzle concept came to Richmond one year ago. It uses a patented hot plate with electromagnetic technology that cooks the high-quality cuts of meat and seafood to diners’ preference. All sauces are made in-house daily from scratch, and the restaurant uses only Canadian Certified Angus Beef, in

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pork belly, and great-quality ingredients – this tiny closet of a space (albeit with a bit of upstairs room) was a hit. Paciﬁc Rim street food has turned out to be a hit and it’s been doing well since. A couple months ago, owners Matthew Adolfo and Greg Edwards expanded to southeast False Creek with a new, bigger location and menu. The new spot seats almost 70, although takeaway is still an option. Even better, the rather large bar features a series of taps pouring out everything from craft beer to prosecco. Lest you think it’s all about the bottles, there is a handful of mixed beverages on the list as well, and they’re as eclectic as

you might expect. A classic caesar ($15) is punched up with kimchi, bacon, tuna and a jumbo prawn, while the Highlander ($15) blends Drambuie and blended Scotch with Aperol and Fernet-Branca. Highballs are only six dollars and there’s even Thai iced tea for teetotallers and designated drivers. The room itself is as punchy as the menu. Wood-top tables, including massive communal, painted reclaimed panels along the walls, and some eye-startling triptychs and murals that feature rainbow-bright water buffalos and cows, as well as what looks like the Buddha and Lucky Mao, dominate the interior. There’s even

space for a patio out front that should see start seeing action soon. The biggest change is the food.You won’t ﬁnd the Bao Chicka Bao Bao that rules the roost in Gastown here, but you will ﬁnd Bang Bang prawns ($18), breaded in rice, garlic, coconut and green onion, served with deep-fried shrimp chips, sweet chili and a crunchy peanut sauce. Green papaya salad ($12) comes with a surprising but tasty chunk of deep-fried bok choy sitting on top. Khao soi with braised oxtail ($20) is meaty and a bit of a burn thanks to a rather liberal hand with the bird’s eye chilies, but sinusclearing properties aside, it’s aromatic and the “12 egg”

noodles are delicious and texturally pleasing. Dessert of the house bao beignets ($5) was a total flop. The chopped pieces of bao are carelessly deepfried in oil that’s not hot or plentiful enough, and the bread obviously hasn’t been allowed enough time to soak in any of the cinnamon or coconut sugar (your choice) or even given a bath in some coconut milk. The result is a dry chunk of bread faintly tossed in sugar with a definite oil slick left on the tongue and fingers. Infinitely better is anything off the grill menu. The restaurant uses special charcoal from Thailand called pokpok that gives off an impressive depth of flavour. Huli Huli

Chicken ($18) is marinated in a Thai vinaigrette, lemongrass and assorted spices and glazed with cane vinegar and shoyu. The chicken has incredible ﬂavour, beautiful moisture and lovely charring on the skin. A mushroom version in togarashi ($16) was equally impressive. At the moment, it’s not very clear what’s meant by the “raw bar” portion of the moniker, but it’s still early days, and hints of Hawaiian poke and oysters are in the wind. W

addition to local ingredients in each market, such as BC steelhead salmon.Try the beef pepper rice or ribeye steak, and the shrimp alfredo. PepperLunchCanada.com

Bistro Wagon Rouge is launching lunch! The tiny French bistro with the big ﬂavours will now be open Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays, 11am-2:30pm. On the menu is tuna niçoise, croque madame, French onion soup, steak frites, country pâté and steak tartare, as well as a daily soup, baguette sandwich, omelette, moules frites, and mac and cheese. BistroWagonRouge.com

than 20 BC wineries will be pouring samples. Tickets $49 on Eventbrite.ca.

fifth annual Taste for Life gala in support of the BC Oral Cancer Prevention Program will take place at the Terminal City Club.This year, Vikram Vij will join Terminal City executive chef Greg Van Poppel to create a multi-course dinner that celebrates the five senses of taste: sweet, salt, bitter, salt and umami – the senses we would lose if afflicted with oral cancer.There will also be live entertainment, wine and champagne pairings, and VIP tasting rooms.Tickets $350 per person or $2,800 for a table of eight. ConquerOralCancer.com

On Saturday, May 7, 4pm10pm,Wet Ape Productions, Buena Onda of Savoury Chef Catering and LatinCouver will be hosting a Cinco de Mayo celebration at Robson Square (plaza level). Look for gourmet tacos, ceviche and other Mexican street-style foods, as well as signature margaritas, palomas, micheladas and cervezas.There will also be street vendors and artisans, piñatas, mariachi bands, traditional dancers, and even a wrestling ring with Luchador wrestlers.Tickets $20 at CasaDeAmigos.ca.

Mooo-ve over, Dolly…Bella Gelateria, the Big Daddy of artisan gelato in Vancouver, has launched a brand new product, water buffalo milk gelato.The Gelato di Bufala is listed as a healthier alternative to cow’s milk, with more calcium, protein and iron, and less cholesterol and sodium. James Coleridge, owner of Bella Gelateria, sources the buffalo milk from Abbotsford farmer Casie Prium, who recently acquired a herd of Italian water buffalo.The gelato is currently available in several flavours, including lemon, chocolate, fior di latte, and white coffee. BellaGelateria.com The patio at Joe Fortes is officially open for the season, along with a dozen new cocktails and some new lunch specials, including the formerly brunch-only chicken and waffles. JoeFortes.ca

Cibo Trattoria is offering a spring three-course prix ﬁxe menu for $44 per person. Options include salad with poached pears and gorgonzola, veal and pork Bolognese, Tuscan ﬁsh stew, chocolate “salami” with crème fraîche, and seasonal panna cotta. CiboTrattoria.com On Sunday, April 17, Garagiste “The Small Guys” Wine Festival is back in Vancouver at Wise Hall. This annual event celebrates artisan winemakers creating commercially produced small lot wines (under 2,000 cases). More

Tickets are still available for this month’s Colab at Latab Food. On April 18, join Latab chef and co-owner Kris Barnholden, along with local forager Camille Flanjak of Museum Eats, forager Cease Wyss of Raven + Hummingbird, chef Jefferson Alvarez of Mosquito and bartender Rob Scope of The Cascade Room. The six-course menu will feature traditional, indigenous foods. Tickets $75 per person via Eventbrite.ca. On April 21, 11:30am1:30pm, Glowbal Restaurant Group is holding an outdoor barbecue on the grounds of the Vancouver Art Gallery in support of BC Children’s Hospital Jeans Day. Proceeds from the sale of every $13 lunch will be donated to the hospital. $10 early bird tickets also available at BCCHF.ca. On Thursday, April 21, the

On April 22, the Young Associates and Here There are joining forces to host a special collaborative evening at The Vancouver Art Gallery between The Acorn and Latab Food, inspired by Mashup:The Birth of Modern Culture. Enjoy four playful courses, join a guided tour of the “Digital Age” exhibit and make your own collage at the arts station. Tickets $52. HereThereStudio.com/ Mashup

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Coal Harbour Liquor Store will once again be hosting its Spring Patio Wine Tasting on the patio at Dockside Restaurant on May 12, 5pm-8pm. Tickets are $49.95 and include all wine samples, tapas from Dockside, a $10 voucher toward any purchase at Coal Harbour Liquor Store, free shuttle from the store to Dockside, and 10 per cent off dinner at Dockside on the event evening. CoalHarbourLiquorStore.com W

April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 7

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Well, here we are again, speaking with two brewers about brewery-related things. It’s always a fun time, but we needed to shake it up a bit. Gain some new perspective. Whatever. So we collected a couple of brewery owners (rather than actual brewers) to interview each other: Nigel Springthorpe from Brassneck Brewery and Nigel Pike from Main Street Brewing (where the conversation took place). The pairing is ideal for this series, for a few reasons. Both co-own/operate breweries in Vancouver’s booming Brewery Creek district; both had long careers in the restaurant industry (Springthorpe with the Alibi Room; Pike with the Cascade Room, among others); and both are named Nigel, which is as convenient a gimmick as The Growler could hope to exploit Enjoy. GROWLER: Did you both intend to open up in this neighbourhood? Nigel Pike: [To other Nigel] Do you want to tell that story? Because you looked at this place ﬁrst. Nigel Springthorpe: Yeah, we did. We looked at so many places. That place that Brassneck is in, and this one, these were the first two places that we ever looked at. It was three years later that it came back to us. The real estate guy from that [Brassneck] spot called me out of the blue and said, “It’s come back up again.” It went through a total massive cycle. We got close on a couple other spots – we did our due diligence on a couple other locations. When we were looking at this place, and if the city said yes, and we tried to do it, I probably wouldn’t have been ready and we would have completely crashed and burned before we ever got off the ground. I think we were really naïve about how much money we were really going to need to set it up. Even once ground is broken and you get going, there’s just things that you have no idea that you’ll be totally blindsided by. You can budget within a certain degree, but – NP: It’s shocking how the bills add up. There’s something else and then some-

8 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

thing else, and then something else. NS: Everything just seems like a $30,000 cheque. NP: My thing with the restaurants was always like, oh, five grand, five grand, five grand. When building the restaurant, it was always five grand. But this one was, you’re right, 25 grand, 30 grand [laughs]. NS: People have asked what the biggest challenge was with opening the brewery, and that was one of them – adjusting and coping with things that come from left field with these giant bills. The one that sticks out for me is when you turn on the light switch and the lights come on – why would we need lights in the budget? Then all of a sudden the city needs them to be up to the newest specs, then you’re upping the code, suddenly you have a $35,000 lighting bill for new ballasts. It just like, how is that not even on our mind, you know? NP: We’ve done a lot more builds. One of our partners is an architect and a designer, so he had a lot more of an understanding of that side of it going into it. Still, timing is the bit that killed us. Trying to get it open on time with city politics was a bit of a challenge. NS: We were lucky, because we got to sit at a table with the city, right when they were looking to make some changes. If it had been the state of affairs that we have now, there would have been 50 of us at that table, but as it happened, there was 33 Acres, the Bomber guys, [Main Street Brewing], we all got to sit at the table with the city and explain to them why certain things made sense, why certain things didn’t. They had already done their recommendations [to council] and there were all these things, like we could be open between noon and 8 o’clock. And at the table, at that meeting, our argument was that patios are allowed to be open until 11, how about we also say 11 for breweries? And they were like, “OK, 11 o’clock” [mimics scribbling in a notebook]. NP: It was as simple as that. It was the weirdest thing! NS: Conrad [Gmoser, Brassneck head brewer and co-owner] and I just had disgusting huge beards that were super gross, and we were with our architects who were in their pressed pants.

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We came out of the meeting and they were like, we don’t know how you guys are doing this, or what the fuck’s going on, but how are you managing to get these things changed? These things were changing in front of our eyes. NP: They [the city] were receptive, which was awesome. At the time, I think we were all like, did that just happen? Because we were totally expecting the opposite.They went with everything that we suggested. I don’t think there was anything… well there was the patio thing, that was the only thing that was kind of a weird one. NS: I mean there was the size too –

NP: Oh right, the 60-seat thing [Ed. note: The breweries in attendance wanted the city to allow up to 60 seats in tasting rooms, when only 40 ended up being permitted]. NS: But at that point, everything was a bonus. It went from being zero to quite a bit of freedom. And I think that was a moment, that day, was when the ﬂoodgates opened, as far as this [industry goes]. I remember, when we ﬁrst opened, we’d get so many guys coming in.You just got this feeling from them where they’re [thinking] “This is just a license to print money! And look at this!” As soon as we got that

lounge license and people saw the busy-ness and what was happening, I think you had some guys who had some money to put somewhere, and that [breweries] are where they put it. NP: Yeah, I guess it came in vogue, didn’t it? You always know somebody who potentially has the skill to open up a brewery. Money wasn’t hard to ﬁnd. People were literally throwing money. I’ve never been in this scenario. When you build restaurants, nobody wants to give you money, but when you build a brewery, I was turning people down in the end to get involved. W

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Garagiste North shines a light on the little guys @MichaelaWine

My first business trip in the wine industry was in 2001. I was invited to Bordeaux for the release of the 2000 vintage.There was a lot of excitement about the inaugural vintage of the new millennium and the wines were being highly touted. It was a pretty incredible way to start my career and I looked PLEASE READ THE FINE PRINT: Offers valid until May 02, 2016. See toyota.ca for complete details. In the event of any discrepancy or inconsistency between Toyota prices, rates and/or other information contained on www.getyourtoyota.ca and that contained on toyota.ca, the latter shall prevail. Errors and omissions excepted. *Lease example: 2016 RAV4 FWD LE Automatic ZFREVT-A with a vehicle price of $27,125 includes $1,885 freight/PDI leased at 1.99% over 60 months with $0 down payment (after application of the $1,500 cash back), equals 130 bi-weekly payments of $130 with a total lease obligation of $16,868. Applicable taxes are extra. Lease 60 mos. based on 100,000 km, excess km charge is $.10. Finance offer: 0.49% finance for 36 months, upon credit approval.- **2016 Corolla CE BURCEM-6M MSRP is $17,610 and includes $1,615 freight/PDI leased at 0.99% over 60 months with $0 down payment (after application of the $1,500 cash back), equals 130 bi-weekly payments of $77 with a total lease obligation of $9,955. Applicable taxes are extra. Lease 60 mos. based on 100,000 km, excess km charge is $.07. Finance offer: 0% finance for 48 months, upon credit approval. *** 2016 4Runner SR5 V6 Automatic BU5JRA-A with a vehicle price of $45,975 includes $1,885 freight/PDI leased at 3.99% over 60 months with $2,925 down payment equals 130 bi-weekly payments of $230 with a total lease obligation of $32,819. Applicable taxes are extra. Lease 60 mos. based on 100,000 km, excess km charge is $.15. †Finance offer: 1.99% finance for 48 months, upon credit approval. †† Stackable cash back offers on select 2016 Corolla models are valid until May 2, 2016. Non-stackable cash back offers on select 2016 RAV4 models are valid until May 2, 2016 and may not be combined with Toyota Financial Services (TFS) lease or finance rates. If you would like to lease or finance at standard TFS rates (not the above special rates), then you may be able to take advantage of cash back offers by May 2, 2016. Cash incentives include taxes and are applied after taxes have been charged on the full amount of the negotiated price. See toyota.ca for complete details on all cash back offers. †††Bi-weekly lease offer available through Toyota Financial Services (TFS) on approved credit to qualified retail customers on most 60 month leases of new and demonstrator Toyota vehicles. Down payment and first bi-weekly payment due at lease inception and next bi-weekly payment due approximately 14 days later and bi-weekly thereafter throughout the term. ‡Aeroplan miles: Vehicle MSRP greater than $60,000 earns 20,000 Aeroplan miles plus 5000 Aeroplan bonus miles for a total of 25,000 miles. Miles offer valid on vehicles purchased/leased, registered and delivered between April 01, and May 02, 2016. Customers must be an Aeroplan Member prior to the completion of the transaction. Offer subject to change without notice. Some conditions apply. Other miles offers available on other vehicles. See Toyota.ca/aeroplan or your Dealer for details. ®Aeroplan and the Aeroplan logo are registered trademarks of Aimia Canada Inc. Visit your Toyota Dealer or www.getyourtoyota.ca for more details. Some conditions apply; offers are time limited and may change without notice. Dealer may lease/sell for less. Each specific model may not be available at each dealer at all times; factory order or dealer trade may be necessary.

Valentin.The style of wine was a departure from the classic wines of Bordeaux. Rather than the ﬁrmly structured, backward reds that required years to come around, the vins de garage tended to be immediately ﬂattering, full, fruit-forward and generously oaked. Furthermore, these winemakers were producing tiny quantities compared to the more famous châteaux (hundreds rather than thousands of cases). And, yes, in some cases, the wines were being made in what was es-

forward to visiting historic and established châteaux like Smith-Haut-Laﬁtte and Cos d’Estournel. It was also at the height of the garagiste movement.This trend saw the emergence of new properties without history or pedigree garnering high point scores and commanding lofty prices. I was just as curious about these newcomers. I met with Jean-Luc Thunevin of Château Valandraud in Saint-Émilion who was one of the original garagiste and visited microchâteaux like Rol

Michaela Morris By the Bottle

Garagiste North returns to the Wise Hall this Sunday, April 17. Contributed photo sentially a converted garage or workshop. While Bordeaux’ vins de garage are still being made, the frenzy has waned (and prices have dropped).Yet the garagiste concept has spread

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bers, they established Garagiste North in 2014. Also known as The Small Guys Wine Festival, it is a collective of approximately 20 winemakers each producing less than 2,000 cases (usually in their own garage-like winery or at a custom crush facility). The wines don’t represent a speciﬁc style, rather they run the gamut of familiar favourites from Pinot Gris and Chardonnay to Pinot Noir and Bordeaux blends as well as less mainstream grapes like Ortega, Zweigelt and Marechal Foch. If you wish to explore BC wine’s small side, Garagiste North takes place this Sunday afternoon (April 17) from 2-4:30pm at the Wise Hall (1882 Adanac) in East Vancouver.Tickets are $49 and available through Eventbrite.To sweeten the pot, there will be live music from Chicken-Like Birds and Peruvian snacks provided by Chicha. I’ll be revealing my top BC “garage” wines in next week’s column. W

Granville Island Brewing goes green

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and morphed. It was adopted in the US with festivals in California bringing together artisanal wineries crafting small-lots.They champion the undiscovered and spawn cult followings.The wineries are united by the limited production of their wines. It’s no surprise that the trend has reached British Columbia. New wineries keep popping up but they seem to be in competition for who makes the least. I’ll be honest; I ﬁnd it hard to keep up with all the new labels. And it’s my job to. I often wonder how these micro-producers manage to sell their wine. They don’t have famous wine critics doling out huge point scores. Most of them work fulltime jobs on the side and have neither a tasting room nor a marketing budget. Enter Jennifer Schell and Terry Meyer-Stone. Schell is the editor of Food &Wine Trails Magazine while MeyerStone works at Tinhorn Creek and is a “garagiste” in her own right. Recognizing that there is strength in num-

WESTENDER STAFF @westendervan

Vancouver’s original micro brewery is going green after signing a deal with green energy provider Bullfrog Power. Granville Island Brewing will become the ﬁrst brewery in BC to use 100 per cent green electricity and 100 per cent green natural gas for its operations, avoiding the emissions associated with the energy used by its brewery facilities. “Committing to renewable energy with Bullfrog Power is the latest step in Granville Island Brewing’s sustainability journey,” said Dave Nicholls, Granville Island Brewing’s general manager. “As one of Canada’s oldest microbreweries, we’re especially proud to be the ﬁrst BC brewery to choose 100 per cent renewable energy.” Through the agreement, Bullfrog Power’s generators put 100 per cent clean, pollution-free electricity into the grid to offset the amount of conventional power that Granville Island Brewing’s

facilities use. Across Canada, Bullfrog Power’s green electricity comes from a blend of wind and hydro power sourced from renewable energy facilities. Bullfrog Power also injects green natural gas onto the national pipeline to match the amount of conventional natural gas used by Granville Island Brewing’s operations. Sourced from a methanecapture project situated on a landﬁll, Bullfrog’s green natural gas is a climate-friendly alternative to conventional, polluting natural gas – biogas is captured, cleaned up, and injected into the national natural gas pipeline, displacing fossil fuel-based gas and reducing CO2 emissions into the atmosphere. In addition to supporting green energy with Bullfrog Power, Granville Island Brewing is also participating in a glass bottle pool where glass is recycled up to 10 times before being broken down. Additionally, spent grains used in the brewing process are used for animal feed at local farms. W

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ARTS // CULTURE

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MUSIC

The Residents: From ‘Baby Sex’ to near-death experiences ALLAN MACINNIS @westendervan

In Theory of Obscurity:A Film About the Residents, Penn Jillette – half of the comedymagic duo Penn and Teller – describes the avant-garde band as exemplifying “the USA at its best,” and says without seeming particularly hyperbolic that they are, “by any sane measure, more successful and happier than the Beatles.” Of the notables who appear in the documentary, testifying to the brilliance of infamously anonymous, long-lived San Francisco anti-band, Jillette has a privileged place, having appeared onstage with the Residents as the unreliable narrator for their first largescale stage performances, The Mole Show, a highly ambitious, media-rich early theatrical production that toured Europe and the USA in the early 1980s. “Certainly everything I ever did was dwarfed by that huge flowing tidal wave of ideas that came out of the Residents,” he says in the film. But he’s not their only noteworthy fan to speak on their behalf. Dean Ween, Jerry Harrison, and Devo’s Gerald Casale all offer testimonials. Simpsons creator Matt Groening, who curated the band’s appearance at All Tomorrow’s Parties in 2010, says he loved them from the moment he first heard them. Primus’s Les Claypool, on the other hand, tells the story of how much he hated the band at first – thinking their song “Constantinople” was “the music they are probably playing in hell.” Gradually, he came to change his mind. “It’s like a fungus,” he observes. “It just kind of takes over.”

The Residents brings their avant-garde weirdness to the Rio Theatre this Thursday, April 14. Contributed photo The Residents – some four decades after the release of their 1974 debut, Meet the Residents – remain so shrouded in secrecy that the people most frequently cited as the founding members – Homer Flynn, Hardy Fox, Jay Clem, and John Kennedy – even now describe themselves solely by their corporate position within the umbrella group, the Cryptic Corporation, referring to the band as “they” or “them” – never “we” or “us.” Flynn, theorized by some to be lead vocalist Randy Rose, credits himself ofﬁcially as the manager of the Residents, as well as their graphic designer, under the alias of Poor Know (or sometimes Pore No) Graphics. Resident or not, he’s a font of insider knowledge. Reached by phone from his

home base in California, he freely admits to Westender to having worn their signature eyeball mask, created for the cover art of their 1979 release, Eskimo. “It’s hard to have them around and not put one on and just see what it’s like,” he explains. He also notes that Randy sometimes sweats a great deal under his present costume, ”an all-over body suit leotard with a little kind of tux jacket,” adding that, “in general, the costumes have gotten lighter and smaller and thinner” since the days of the eyeballs, or, say, the giant bunny suit Randy wore for the Bunny Boy tour. Masks and anonymity were not built into the band from the outset, it seems. Some of the most remarkable footage in the documentary is a black

and white clip of the band, long before they’d taken a name, at an open mic night at a folk club in San Francisco, on October 18, 1971. Unmasked, the group – hairy hippies, the lot of them – cavorts about the stage, making an obnoxious, theatrical racket, a jazzy cacophony that bears little resemblance to the artful, deliberate weirdness of Meet the Residents. Flynn, who will only go so far as to admit having been “in the audience” that night, says, “this was during [British guitarist] Snakeﬁnger’s initial encounter with the Residents. He was really a blues guitar player, for the most part, but heavily inﬂuenced by Frank Zappa. He had been going to several of these clubs, and the Residents had gone with him on occasion, and after getting

bored out of their mind with all these mediocre acoustic singer/songwriters” – Flynn describes them as “James Taylor imitators” – “they came to the decision that, ‘Okay, we can do that, but we’ll do it differently.’” Inspired by Captain Beefheart and Sun Ra, aspects of the proto-Residents’ music are startlingly in-your-face. Early song titles include “Go Fuck Yourself on the Doorknob, Mom,” and “Rusty Coathangers for the Doctor.” Or there’s the Baby Sex tape, the second of two reelto-reels the band sent to Hal Halverstadt of Warner Brothers, which had as its cover a silkscreen blown up from an ad for mail-order pornography from Denmark. It depicted a woman fellating a young boy – or perhaps it was a midget? “All you can tell is it’s someone with short legs and a small penis,” Flynn offers. If it all seems a little aggressive, consider that the band began as complete outsiders: Louisiana hippies, transplanted to San Francisco, with no particular musical skills or means of reaching the people they regarded as peers. “They were looking for a window or a door to get in, not so much to get into the mainstream culture, but just to become a voice, in terms of the things they appreciated artistically. I think they felt like they needed to be aggressive to do that,” Flynn says. “While the Residents were never punk – they were always more ‘out ’ than that – there was a certain punk attitude or energy that infused their music.” Forty-odd years later, the band has played a pioneering role in the world of rock videos, CD ROM multimedia art, and

For the Record: Sightlines ROBERT MANGELSDORF @robmangelsdorf

Summer is around the corner, and with it the search for 2016’s sunshine anthems begins. Vancouver power pop band Sightlines offers a handful of frontrunners on their latest LP, “North”. The album is packed with hookladen pop-kissed gems, perfect for sunny days with the windows rolled down and the stereo cranked. But make no mistake, this isn’t saccharine pop ﬂuff. Led by guitarist/vocalist Eric Axen (formerly of Hermetic and Painted Black), Sightlines creates undeniably catchy songs about some pretty heavy subjects, including rape cul-

Westender.com

ture and Axen’s own convalescence for blood poisoning. The songs are earnest and deeply personal, but also oddly optimistic, not unlike the ﬁrst reprieve from six months of Vancouver rain. “The spring will come again,” Axen softly reassures us on “The Tent.” Axen’s gentle voice works in perfect contrast to his distorted guitar, C.A. Chux’s bass fuzz, and Graeme McDonald’s sea of crash cymbals, bringing to mind early Superchunk or Moncton noise pop pioneers Eric’s Trip (who the band credits as a major inﬂuence). Sightlines is celebrating the release of “North” on Friday, April 15 with an all

even advertising – having paid a San Francisco radio station, KFRC, to play each minutelong song on their Commercial Album over the course of 40 advertising slots. As seen in the film, they have had a refrigerator filled with their complete works (and one eyeball) put into the permanent collection at the Museum of Modern Art. And the band continues to present their media-enhanced, heavily costumed, and weirdas-fuck stageshow to hosts of rabid fans and puzzled noobs the world over. The lineup is “in flux” at present, Flynn says, with rumours of members, real or fictional, retiring. But whoever exactly the Residents are, at present, they will be at the Rio on April 14, performing after a screening of Theory of Obscurity. Flynn – who at the very least will be in the audience – explains that the tour is themed around “birth, rebirth, reincarnation, and near death experiences,” featuring a hand-picked selection of songs from their back catalogue that fit the bill. As for the film? “I’m happy with it,” Flynn acknowledges. “I thought that (filmmaker) Don Hardy did an amazing job of taking 40-plus years of Residents’ craziness and condensing it down into an hour and a half. It’s not a job I would have wanted.” W

THE RESIDENTS

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mia, as documented in our song “Hospital.” Finish this sentence: When I’m not writing and playing music, I spend my time… cooking, reading and watching movies. First record/CD you ever bought? Red Hot Chili Peppers, What Hits!?

Contributed photo ages show here in Vancouver. Check the band’s Facebook page to ﬁnd out where and when (Facebook.com/ SightlinesBand) Westender picked Axen’s brain to ﬁnd out where he stands on the subject of delicious sandwiches and viral videos. Who are you? Eric Axen [vocals and guitars for Sightlines].

Where are you from? Vancouver. In my case, by way of Smithers. How do you describe your sound? Fuzzy power-pop/ punk. Who are your major musical influences? Jawbreaker, Eric’s Trip, Guided by Voices. Favourite sandwich? The

BALT (coconut bacon, avocado, lettuce and tomato) from the Black Lodge (or homemade – sorry, Black Lodge).

What is one place you will never play again, and why? There’s a few venues I’d rather not badmouth in print, but they’re out there. I think I could never play Thunder Bay again and still die happy.

Best live music performance you’ve ever seen? Fugazi at the Bill Copeland Arena, July 2001.

Super secret fact about you that (almost) no one knows? Our drummer’s biggest claim to fame is a viral Internet video known as “The Meat Sorcerer.” W

Closest you’ve ever come to death? Possibly when I was hospitalized for septice-

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April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 11

ARTS // CULTURE

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WHAT’S ON Th/14

Fr/15

Su/17

Sa/16

Mo/18

MUSIC

LINDSAY ROBERTSON & THE WALKMAN BROTHERS An evening of soulful blues, folk and guitar wizardry in an intimate setting with the singer-songwriter from Guelph, Ontario, with special guests Jesse Waldman, Noah Walker and Zach Lancaster. 9pm at Slickity Jim’s. Admission by donation.

SPIRIT OF THE WEST After 30 years and 50 performances at the Commodore, the iconic Canadian folk rockers play a series of farewell shows at the beloved venue. 8:30pm at Commodore Ballroom. Tickets $45 at LiveNation.com and Ticketmaster.ca

HAYSEED DIXIE Nashville “rockgrass” band hits town with special guest Terry. 8pm at WISE Hall. Tickets $18.50 at Red Cat, Zulu, Highlife, Neptoon and TicketFly.com

LA ROSA ENFLORECE An afternoon of early Sephardic love songs, English Elizabethan ayres and music from the Levant featuring Elspeth McVeigh, Farooq Al-Sajee and Mark Sullivan. 2pm at Hycroft Manor. Tickets $ 22 at EventBrite.ca. All ages show.

THE STORY SO FAR California punk band play tunes from their latest self-titled release with special guests Comeback Kid and Culture Abuse. 7:30pm at the Imperial. Tickets $25 at Red Cat, Zulu and TicketWeb.ca

SWAMPWOLF Electric rhythmist with the guitar and banjo plays tunes from his latest release, The Laconic Bard, with special guests the Crooked, Shiloh Lindsey, and Peter of Classy Hobos. 9pm at LanaLou’s. Cover is $10. THE RESIDENTS San Francisco experimental music and art collective present a screening of their new documentary Theory of Obscurity, followed by a live performance. 8pm at Rio Theatre. Tickets $35 at Red Cat, Neptoon, Zulu and TicketWeb.ca HOPSIN American hip hop MC, producer, director, actor and editor from LA presents the Hop Solo tour with special guests Snak the Ripper and Alpha Omega. 9:30pm at Vogue Theatre. Tickets $35 at Red Cat, Beat Street, DIPT, Zulu and TicketFly.com KIBBLES N’ BEATS A hip hop fundraiser for the SPCA featuring performances from Kawz, Nevone, JBlaq, Mama Rudegyal, Zada, Eros Taylor, Krewz & Terez and Dakk One. 8pm at Biltmore Cabaret. Tickets $8 at TicketFly. com

THEATRE/DANCE GOOD PEOPLE In South Boston, where paycheques hardly make the rent and a night on the town consists of a few rounds of bingo, Margie finds herself down on her luck in this shrewd character-driven comedy that asks why some people manage to change their fortune, and some don’t. 7:30pm at Stanley Industrial Alliance Stage. Tickets at ArtsClub.com. Runs until April 24.

KOBAN Dark post-punk duo celebrate their video release with Weird Candle, Dream Cars and Wire Spine. 7:30pm at Biltmore Cabaret. Tickets $10 at the door only.

THE PROVINCIAL ARCHIVE Indie-pop power trio from Edmonton play an early show in support of their latest self-titled release with special guest Mike Edel. 7pm at Biltmore Cabaret. Tickets $12 at TicketFly.com FRETLESS A unique mash-up of celtic, folk and chamber music from the string quartet out of Vancouver Island with special guest Ben Plotnick. 8pm at Revue Stage on Granville Island. Tickets $24 at Red Cat, Highlife, Rufus’ Guitars, Tapestry Music and RogueFolk.bc.ca THE FACEPLANTS Vancouver pop/ska rockers take the stage with special guests Pistolfish and This Side Of Town. 8pm at Venue. Tickets $10 at TicketZone.com and $15 at the door. DOUG KOYAMA An intimate evening of improvised a capella heightened with a loop pedal and rich vocals from both acts on the Movin’ & Groovin’ tour with special guests Aaron Goodwin & the Orchard and the Movie. 9pm at Skinny Fat Jack’s. Admission by donation. THE BAD BEATS Local rockers debut their LP, His Vengeful Hand, with The Mants and the Lizard People. 10pm at Pat’s Pub. Tickets $12 at the door only.

COMEDY JONATHAN KITE Best known as Oleg, the sex-crazed Ukrainian cook on CBS’s Two Broke Girls, the Chicago improv and sketchy comedian brings his stand-up to town with an opening set from John Cullen. 8pm at Yuk Yuk’s. Tickets $20 at YukYuks.com

CRASHING ANGELS Self-described “commercial hard rockers” from Surrey take the stage with special guests Dark Stone and Head. 7:30pm at Studio Records. Tickets $10 in advance or $12 at the door.

Hopsin, April 14

THEATRE/DANCE GRUESOME PLAYGROUND INJURIES A fascinating and tender story traces the ricocheting dynamics between a corrosive masochist and an accident-prone daredevil over the course of 30 years as they spar, spat and haltingly try to rescue one another. 8pm at Pacific Theatre. Tickets at PacificTheatre. org. Runs until April 16. THE GOVERNMENT INSPECTOR When an incognito inspector arrives to investigate the corrupt officials of a small Russian town, their flurry of activity to cover up their misdeeds is interrupted by news of a suspicious person staying at the inn. 8pm at Jericho Arts Centre. Tickets at JerichoArtsCentre.com. Runs until April 17. DEAD METAPHOR This dark comedy from George F. Walker explores what happens when a former sniper in Afghanistan returns home to Canada to find the job market at home doesn’t exactly suit his particular skill set. 8pm at Firehall Arts Centre. Tickets at FirehallArtsCentre.com. Runs until April 23.

EVENTS CITYSCAPE SHOWCASE A night of live music, visual art, drinks and great company with performances from Zane, Royal Oak, Esc, and exhibitions by Tina Yan, Cody Cowx and Jordan Westre. 7pm at Onlok Gallery & Studios (1636 Venables). Tickets $15 at EventBrite.ca. All ages welcome.

88 MILE TRIP Vancouver stoner rockers appear with special guests Mammoth Grove and Wiser Fool. 9:30pm at Funky Winker Beans. Cover is $10. HARRINGTON SAINTS AND STREETLIGHT SAINTS Oakland street punk/ American oi band co-headline with the Calgary melodic street punks and special guests Paranoi, Soundcity Hooligans and the Toxiks. FILTER Industrial rock band from Cleveland bring the Make America Hate Again tour to town in support of Crazy Eyes, with Orgy, Vampires Everywhere and Death Valley High. 6pm at Venue. Tickets $23 at Red Cat, Scrape, Zulu and BPLive. Electrostub.com RECORD STORE DAY AFTER PARTY Keep the good vibes going and head down to Hastings for performances from Brass, Dead Quiet, Astrakhan and Oldage. 8:30pm at SBC Restaurant. Cover is $5.

THEATRE/DANCE HIGH TEA Fringe Festival favourites are back as James and Jamesy struggle to hold onto reality when the whole world is submerged in tea in this uproariously playful and interactive show. 8pm at Studio 1398. Tickets at Tickets.TheatreWire.net. Runs until April 17. THE JUNGLE BOOK Carousel Theatre presents the powerful coming-of-age tale set deep in the Indian jungle where the human Mowgli is raised by wolves, staged for children six years and up. 2pm at Waterfront Theatre. Tickets at CarouselTheatre.ca

COLLECTIVE SOUL American rock band from Georgia are back in support of See What You Started By Continuing, with special guests Pigeon Park. 8:30pm at Commodore Ballroom. Tickets $49.50 at LiveNation.com and Ticketmaster.ca CORIN RAYMOND Singersongwriter from Toronto whose Johnny Cash and John Prine influenced songs are quintessentially Canadian, takes the stage with special guest Jonathan Byrd. 8pm at St. James Hall. Tickets $24 at Red Cat, Highlife, Rufus’ Guitars, Tapestry Music and RogueFolk. bc.ca SNOOP DOGG Multi-platinum artist, actor and icon drops in for a DJ set as part of the Westcoast Smokers Bowl. 9pm at Fortune Sound Club. Tickets $50 at Dipt, Beat Street, Zulu and FortuneSoundClub.com

THEATRE/DANCE THE INVISIBLE HAND A timely political thriller from Pulitizer Prize-winning playwright Ayad Akhtar is a provocative piece following a kidnapped American trader in Pakistan playing the market for his life amidst financial chaos and political vindication. 2pm at The Cultch. Tickets at Tickets.TheCultch.com. Runs until April 23.

CHEAP & FUN

ST. GERMAIN French house and jazz musician tours in support of his latest self-titled release. 9pm at Commodore Ballroom. SOLD OUT. KATRINA KADOSKI Singer-songwriter from Sooke debuts her EP, Dreamtime, with special guest Naked Blue. 8pm at Media Club. Tickets $15 at the door only.

COMEDY THE LAUGH GALLERY WITH GRAHAM CLARK Join the East Van comedian and his pals for guaranteed laughs and a shot at winning thrift store treasures at one of the longest running comedy shows in town. 9pm at Havana Theatre. Tickets $5 at EastVanComedy.com QUEER PROV Don’t let the queer deter you – you don’t have to identify to get it! This not-for-profit society dedicated to creating a queer community that creates, supports, enjoys and teaches improv theatre unites every week on Mondays, to set yourself up for a gay ol’ week. 8pm at XY (1216 Bute).

THEATRE/DANCE THE VALLEY This ensemble piece explores the aftermath of a teenage boy’s arrest on a SkyTrain platform, questioning the contradictory attempts to balance care and public safety in the search for what “doing the right thing” actually means. 7:30pm at Granville Island Stage. Tickets at ArtsClub.com

THE FIFTH ANNUAL MR./MISS COBALT DRAG COMPETITION Your homo away from home plays host to the prestigious East Van drag competition, where may compete but only one wins, determined by an audience ballot and your judges Isolde N. Barron and Rose Butch, hosted by Peach Cobblah. 8pm at The Cobalt. Cover is $7. Runs weekly until April 22.

Arlo Guthrie, April 21

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Saturday April 30, 2:00-4:00pm Choices’ Floral Shop & Annex 2615 W. 16th Ave., Vancouver

Cooking with Beans and Lentils with Choices Chef Antonio and the Nutrition Team

This is the year of the pulse for good reason! Pulses like beans and lentils are great sources of protein, fibre and minerals. They also support digestive and heart health, while helping to keep your waist line trim. Join the Choices team to see how easy and delicious it is to cook with these culinary gems. Plus, the Choices Nutrition Team will share their tips to reap all of the benefits of beans without the bloat. Cost $20 plus tax. To register visit choicesmarkets.com/events. For inquiries call 604-952-2266. /Choices_Markets

12 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

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ARTS // CULTURE

WHAT’S ON Tu/19

In the Abbey Garden

Th/21

We/20

MUSIC

COURTNEY BARNETT Australian singer-songwriter and guitarist plays her first Vancouver show in support of her debut release Sometimes I Sit and Think, and Sometimes I Just Sit, with special guest Alvvays. 8pm at Commodore Ballroom. SOLD OUT.

SLOAN Toronto-based rock/ power-pop quartet from Halifax swing through on the One Chord To Another 20th Anniversary tour. 8pm at The Imperial. Tickets $35 at Red Cat and Ticketmaster.ca

ARLO GUTHRIE American folk singer-songwriter known for his songs of protest against social injustice, returns to town for an intimate evening of song featuring Alice Restaurant Massacre with special guest Sarah Lee Guthrie. 8pm at Chan Shun Concert Hall. SOLD OUT.

PAROV STELAR Austraian musician, producer and DJ appears with special guests Stelartronic and Anduze. 7pm at Vogue Theatre. Tickets $45 at TicketFly. com. All ages welcome. PAUL MCCARTNEY Sir Paul, British pop-rock legend and former Beatle plays the first of two nights on his One on One tour. 8pm at Rogers Arena. SOLD OUT. HOT JAZZ JAM Take to the streets of New Orleans for a night of live hot jazz and dancing with performances from Pacific Northwest Hot Shots, followed by an open jam session. 9:30pm at Backstage Lounge. Cover is $12.

THE ORCHID CLUB: GLAMOROUS BUT DANGEROUS Four drop dead dames will steal your heart and get you into trouble in this stage-free striptease featuring Ruthe Ordare, Villainy Lovless, Miss Fitt and Nite Mare, hosted by Bunny in the ferocious Projection Room. 9pm at Fox Cabaret. Cover is $10. DIRTY OLD WOMAN Judgments, double standards and comedy rips through the heart of this tale when 50-something-year old Nina meet Gerry, 20 years her junior and sparks fly in more ways than one. 8pm at The Cultch. Tickets at Tickets.TheCultch. com. Runs until April 24.

EVENTS DANDY OPERANDI Cor Flammae’s fabulous karaoke fundraiser and classical salon is back, so don your tap hat and sing with your pals in Vancouver’s most flaming choral ensemble, with performances throughout the evening. 7pm at XY. Tickets $18+ at Universe.com

JULY 2-8 // 2015

EVERYTHING VANCOUVER

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The ultimate happy hour guide • VANCOUVER’S BEST BEACHES • • CITR GETS SWANKY NEW HOME • • THE NEW MALE BIRTH CONTROL REVOLUTION •

NEWS // ISSUES • STYLE // DESIGN • EAT // DRINK • MUSIC // ARTS • FILM // TV • HEALTH // SEX

COMEDY IMPROV AGAINST HUMANITY The Fictionals are adding fresh cards to the official show deck with more sweet prizes, and the crowning of the next Most Horrible Person in Vancouver. 8pm at Rio Theatre. Tickets $10 at RioTheatreTickets.ca and $12 at the door.

THEATRE/DANCE

Westender.com

HAYDN’S LORD NELSON MASS & HANDEL’S MESSIAH The Oratorio Singers present Haydn’s beautiful but seldom performed Mass For Troubled Times with selected choruses from Handel’s ever-popular Messiah. 8pm at St. Andrew’s Wesley United Church. Tickets $25 at NelsonMass.BrownPaperTickets.com

JUNE 24-JULY 1 // 2015

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RAIN: A TRIBUTE TO THE BEATLES The next best thing to seeing the fab four themselves is this tribute that spans the entire discography of the legendary British rockers including complex and challenging songs never before performed for an audience with new multimedia content for the 2016 tour. 7:30pm at Queen Elizabeth Theatre. Tickets $45+ at Ticketmaster.ca.

EVENTS SOUND OF DRAGON MUSIC FESTIVAL Vancouver’s first festival devoted to Chinese music showcasing diverse styles, while presenting authentic traditional music performed by Vancouver’s most innovative musicians including Borealis String Quartet, Orchid Ensemble and guest artists from Taiwan over the course of the four day festival. Tickets $20-$70 at BrownPaperTickets.com. Runs until April 24 at Roundhouse Community Centre.

EVERYTHING VANCOUVER

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Reclaim: The art of sustainable living • CROSS-COUNTRY TOAST TO CANADA DAY • • STEP-BY-STEP GUIDE TO CANNING • • TOUGH AGE’S SCUZZ-POP MASTERPIECE •

NEWS // ISSUES • STYLE // DESIGN • EAT // DRINK • MUSIC // ARTS • FILM // TV • HEALTH // SEX

JUNE 18-24 // 2015

Westender.com

Generously sponsored by and with the generous support of Barbara Lowy in memory of Otto Lowy

LUSH Indie-pop band from the UK known for their success in the ‘90s reunites for a 2016 reunion tour with special guest Tamaryn. 9pm at Commodore Ballroom. Tickets $35 at Red Cat, Zulu and Ticketmaster.ca CAITLIN COOK AND DEBBIE MILLER Brooklyn-based Cook and Seattle singer-songwriter Miller take on Vancouver for one night only with songs to pluck your heartstrings and get your feet tapping. 9pm at Slickity Jim’s. Admission is free.

May 7, 2016

JPNSGRLS Four-piece Canadian garage pop band from Vancouver play a hometown show ahead of the release of their second LP this summer with special guests Fine Times. 9pm at Biltmore Cabaret. Tickets $12 at Red Cat and TicketFly.com APRIL IN PARIS Van Django delivers a unique mix of nostalgic favourites, jazz standards and pop tunes. 8pm at St. James Hall. Tickets $28 at Rufus’ Guitars, Highlife, Tapestry Music and RogueFolk.bc.ca LIGHT SHADOW FIRE A multidisciplinary performance with musicians from Taipei, London and Vancouver and live painting by Li Tung exploring improvisation in the context of new works by a variety of artists. 8pm at Western Front. Tickets $15 at NowSociety.org. All ages show.

7:30pm Ryerson United Church, 2195 West 45th Ave, Vancouver Music lovers in Victoria – check out www.christchurchcathedral.bc.ca for information on our April 30 performance in Victoria. Tickets available at Media Sponsor

Tickets: $30 adults | $25 seniors | $15 Students with valid ID

ticketstonight.ca

1.877.840.0457 (service charges apply)

More information at elektra.ca or by calling

604.739.1255

WIN YOUR SHARE OF $2,500!

COMEDY RAPE IS REAL AND EVERYWHERE: A COMEDY SHOW Rape jokes are everywhere. But who are the people telling them, and are they ever okay – let alone funny? What if the people telling rape jokes were survivors? 8pm at Hot Art Wet City.

EVERYTHING VANCOUVER

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JUNE 11-17 // 2015

EVERYTHING VANCOUVER

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Jazz Fest turns 30

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Morna Edmundson, Artistic Director Guest artists: Borealis String Quartet

HOT SEAT DRAWS

Saturdays in April | 2-6:30PM

1 WINNER DRAWN EVERY HALF AN HOUR FOR $250! 760 Paciﬁc Blvd. South Vancouver, BC V6B 5E7

Across from BC Place P 604.687.3343

EDGEWATERCASINO.CA MUST BE 19+ WITH AN ENCORE REWARDS CARD AND MATCHING VALID PHOTO GOVERNMENT ID TO PARTICIPATE. COMPLETE RULES AVAILABLE AT GUEST SERVICES. MANAGEMENT RESERVES THE RIGHT TO CHANGE, AMEND OR CANCEL PROMOTION AT ANY TIME WITHOUT NOTICE.

April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 13

ARTS // CULTURE

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POETRY & VISUAL ARTS

Lab Art creates connections

KELSEY KLASSEN @kelseyklassen

When Gloria Bernal moved to Vancouver from Guadalajara, Mexico, she brought with her a love of the arts. Then, after studying entertainment business management at Vancouver Film School, the Glitz Entertainment co-founder gave the city an event that connects and celebrates its vibrant multicultural arts scene. “When I graduated, myself and the two co-founders saw a need inVancouver for unifying all the [art] disciplines to work together as a team,” Bernal recalls. “We decided to create Lab Art Show, where we can actually combine all the disciplines and showcase them in one night – that way everyone can pollinate and work in different projects in the future together.” Four years and six Lab Art Shows later, the event has grown into a mammoth showcase of world music, painting, photography, fashion, short ﬁlm and dance, with production values improving with each incarnation.The event has also built art collections, helping its artists sell over

Jillian Christmas (L) and Erin Kirsh (R) of Verses Festival of Words.

Chapter and Verse Lab Art Show co-founder Gloria Bernal. Dan Toulgoet photo $80,000 worth of art. This year, on April 16, more than 100 artists will take over the Roundhouse Community Centre. Of the plethora of participants, highlights include an experimental multi-media performance by musicians and composers from Vancouver Community College, French-Canadian sculptor Padam (formerly known as Morley Wiseman), whose work is inspired by his

14 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

illustrious professional dance career, the debut of French photographer Pascal Avenet’s latest series, exploring the connections between historical land and its inhabitants, and Rome/Seoul/NewYorkbased artistic duo Shinliart, who have documented their long-distance relationship in a captivating and creative way. Curated from a pool of open submissions, the idea

behind Lab Art is that art is for everyone. “When we have all the portfolios we sit down and watch all the videos and discuss what would be a good ﬁt for our audience,” says Bernal. “Vancouver is very multicultural, so we like to have a ﬁt for everyone to enjoy their culture within one night.” W ~ Lab Art Show runs April 16 from 6pm.Tickets $30 at the door; Glitz-Entertainment.com

KRISTYN ANTHONY @allovthethings

Celebrating the transformative power of words is the ofﬁcial mantra of Verses Festival of Words,Vancouver’s unique, cutting-edge, alternative literary festival, as it returns to East Van for its sixth year. Over the course of 10 days, poets, performers and participants will mingle at venues across Commercial Drive, attending workshops, master classes, storytelling showcases, the launch of literary magazine Oratorealis and the Canadian Individual Poetry Slam championships (CIPS). Five years ago when the festival launched (under the name Vancouver International Poetry Festival) the focus was primarily slam poetry – the rhythmic reciting of original material. “We’ve grown exponentially, grown outside the poetry festival to include so many more people who identiﬁed beyond poet,” explains,Verses artistic director Jillian Christmas. “We were able to broaden the components of the festival, we have stand-up comedy, singer-songwriters and conversation groups, and I think it brings an opportunity to look at the literary arts in a different way than we’ve been told to,” she elaborates. Christmas says Verses is about community and extending what that means, offering stage space to artists not traditionally given any. The aim is to bring together people who learn from each other in experiencing one another, and inclusivity is fundamental. A must-see this year is There Be Monsters, a premiere work by Amber Dawn, Ivan Coyote and Kai Cheng Thom. The trio, along with some special guests, will share individual stories around the way we can transform trauma and the scars we accumulate throughout our lives. “These artists have a breadth of experience, and it’s a really beautiful way of unifying anyone who has felt on the fringes in any way,” Christmas explains. Innovative pieces like the

Point of Inflection Cinemagraph Project breathe new life into the festival. Local artists Christoph Prevost, David Phu and Michael Champion have collaborated with 13 writers to create moving pictures accompanied by musical composition, centred around the idea of the focal moment of change or, “point of inflection.” “We had no idea what to expect,” Christmas says excitedly of the work. “They highlighted elements even the writers didn’t expect to see. It’s surprising and rewarding to see what can happen when we blend our art forms together. “Collaboration is one of the ways we can do anything original anymore, it can only exist in this one moment and we’re lucky enough to all be there.” While the main event of the festival, remains CIPS, where nationwide slam poets vie to represent Canada on the world stage in Paris, there is still a little something for everyone.The Hullabaloo youth slam welcomes students to participate, while Teen Angst Poetry by Sara Bynoe takes you back to laugh at words that once made you cry. Mash Poetics, a festival favourite where spoken word meets music, asks poets from across the county to write new works inspired by this year’s chosen album, Alanis Morissette’s Jagged Little Pill. Performed by a live band and hosted by renowned writer RC Weslowski, it promises to be a fun, danceable offering. While Christmas says it can sometimes be difficult to find venues in East Van that are physically and financially accessible, it remains a priority to keep the festival at home on the Drive. “We wanted to be able to pay back to the community, and the businesses who have been so good to all of these artists,” she says proudly. “They’ve supported us, a lot of them are our sponsors and we want them to feel included and know how important they are.We couldn’t have built up without them.” W &=3#!3! +3!IHF@A 8$:8#6! #G;! 5%#HA )*.4@> * @I !3A39I F3;G3!, =3#!3!+3!IHF@A,9@

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ARTS // CULTURE

@WESTENDERVAN

VISUAL ARTS

Landscape painter David Pirrie connects the dots

KELSEY KLASSEN @kelseyklassen

When David Pirrie sees a mountain he loves, the North Shore landscape painter quietly lifts it out of its surroundings and transfers it – crags, crevices, ridges and all – cleanly onto his canvas. But instead of stopping there, after each shadow, gully, and snowy crest has been painstakingly realized in monochromatic patterns, Pirrie does the unthinkable: he vandalizes his own landscapes, marking their surfaces with his instantly recognizable signature of pop-art dots and lines. In advance of Mapping the Rockies, his upcoming exhibition of all-new works at the Ian Tan Gallery on South Granville, we caught up with the avid mountaineer to learn more about his process, and how these mountains have changed in the 10 years he has been painting them. Do you ever pause, after painting a stunning mountain face, and question adding the dots or lines? I start my paintings with a pretty clear path to completion. The colour I end up using for the background and overlays gets dictated only later, as my choices are grounded in colour theory. Once I am close to finishing the landscape part of the painting, I then proceed to counter the monochromatic palette of the mountain with intense pantone based colours as a background, which also usually leads into a dot matrix or map grid overlay on top of the mountain. This aspect of my work is both conceptually and formally driven. Formal in the sense that it is derived from colour theory and employed to effect the overall composition, meaning the colour becomes an integral part of the painting. Has adding these dots and grids changed how you are perceived and received in the art world? Had you experimented with “plain” landscapes before moving in this direction? My very first series of mountainscapes were very small minimalist cutouts of mountains with no overlays and a stark white background. In 2004, I completed a new series titled Subduction Zone, where again the mountains were excised from their surroundings, but I added rectangular grids to convey movement. These series were very well received and gained quite a bit of attention. My first series with dots was a body of work titled Codified Topographies. These works were still on a

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peak 10,000 years ago for example. On a personal level each peak I paint takes me back there, navigating its complexities.

How long have you been painting these landscapes and what have you learned about mountains in this time? I have been painting mountains for roughly 10 years now and in that time I have developed an intuitive understanding of the morphology of mountains – their folds, cirques, arêtes and glacial systems. I have also come to understand that the mountain is universal in its attraction as a trope for the sublime and the unattainable.

Artist David Pirrie’s latest exhibition, Mapping the Rockies, will be on display at the Ian Tan Gallery for the month of April. Contributed photo grey monochromatic background but I added a grid of semi transparent dots over the landscapes. It was one of those viola moments for me, propelling the paintings into a more engaged contemporary dialogue. Subsequently my work started to gain broader appeal and I became more ambitious with my use of colour. Do you embrace the popart label? Or think of your work in a different context? I have struggled for some time now as to how to talk about my work in the larger scheme of the art world. Deﬁnition is important for many as it helps place an artwork or idea in a clear lineage of accepted art terms. The pop-art reference to my work is understandable, however I do not ascribe to this line of thinking. What I need is a new word to describe my work. It’s landscape but not, it has conceptual and formal grounding but uses really poppy colours, it’s a little science with all the grids and study of geography, it’s very graphic and hard-edged. I could go on… Why mountains? Where does the interest come from? I am deeply immersed in mountain culture. I’ve spent my life exploring the mountains on foot, skis and mountain bikes. Growing up in North Vancouver, I would ask the adults what was on the other side of the North Shore mountains and they could never tell me, so I had to ﬁnd out myself. It was only much later in my artistic path that I began to investigate the mountain. Once I combined all my interests in cartography, architecture and the mountain I had a voila moment. Describe the new col-

lection. What sets it apart from your previous investigations? This new body of work is all about the Canadian Rockies. I have spent many a climbing and ski touring/mountaineering trip to this vast area and have always come away with a special understanding of geological time. The stratification in evidence, the layering of hundreds of millions of years of sediment cannot go unnoticed, and I developed a special relationship with its complexities. I was also reminded of the importance of Canadian landscape imaging with the recent major show of Tom Thomson’s work at LA’s Hammer Museum. Featuring his iconic paintings of mountains mainly from his sojourns to the Rockies, it was curated by [actor/comedian] Steve Martin and brought fresh light to an important intersection of Canadian landscape painting. Three lines of investigation form the basis of this show. Exploded contour maps of the ice fields I would use to navigate the complex mountain environment, portraits of mountains I have skied or climbed with longitude and latitude grid overlays extending the concept of relief and travel, and dot overlays on mountains as a form of plotting. Still perhaps in an experimental stage, the Map paintings take on an almost abstract quality, while retaining my rigorousness for details. Do different mountains speak to you differently, have different personalities? What stories do they tell you and how? This all comes down to the fundamentals of geology, plate tectonics and erosion. Each chain of mountains tells a story of uplift and erosion. Sedimentation, stratification and

rock formation are vastly different form one region to the next. The Coast range is young metamorphic granite while the Rockies top layers of sedimentation have ocean fossils embedded in them. So yes, each mountain I paint tells a story, how a glacier carved out its

Have the mountains you paint and frequent changed at all over the course of your career, environmentally speaking? The loss and recession of western Canada’s ice ﬁelds and glaciers cannot go unnoticed. This, in fact, will become a critical point in my work. A recent study published in the Globe and Mail predicts with much certainty a loss of 50 per cent of ice mass in the coast

range of BC and a whopping 80-90 per cent in the Canadian Rockies by the end of this century. As glaciers recede new landscapes emerge, landslides occur as vast amounts of glacial till is left exposed. Rising melt water swells rivers in the late summer, leading to greater ﬂooding. Receding glaciers have drastically changed many of the mountains I visit. In fact, many of the glaciers I used to use as ascent routes in the Garibaldi Park region do not even exist any more.

Why paint them on a blank, skyless background? In removing the individual mountain from the surrounding range I decontextualize the subject, making it symbolic rather than representational. I treat the mountains like celebrities, fashioning larger than life, unattainable, beautiful and mysterious portrayals. W 7 !*/1; '16618% .*::1@5 238 $=>-184 runs until April 30 at the Ian Tan Gallery (2321 Granville).

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Businesses that TD announces multi-year funding to Out in Schools

hanks to a generous multi-year gift from TD of $75,000, Out in Schools will continue to have sustainable funding over the next few years to be able to deliver valuable programs throughout B.C. high schools. For the past 13 years, TD has been a proud supporter of Out in Schools and in this time has contributed over $100,000 to the program. “Corporate partners like TD help make our programming possible and we are grateful to TD for their longterm support,” said Stephanie Goodwin, Executive Director of Out in Schools. “With this new multi-year funding commitment we look forward to equipping students with the language and tools to create more LGBTQ2 (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, two-spirited)-inclusive classrooms across B.C.” This donation will help to provide program funding and support of Out in School’s anti-homophobia, antitransphobia and anti-bullying efforts, as well as support for expanded rural school outreach in British Columbia. “TD is thrilled to be supporting such an important organization—one that helps to

inspire young people across the province by debunking stereotypes and creating awareness of the challenges that LGBTQ2 youth go through, through film,” said Grant Minish, Regional Manager, LGBT Business Development, TD Bank Group. “Just as TD is committed to creating an inclusive and welcoming workplace for all employees, we are also committed to supporting like-minded organizations in our communities.” Out in Schools brings progressive films into classrooms to facilitate dialogue about the reality of LGBTQ2 youth experience and teach the impacts of homophobia, transphobia and other forms of discrimination. Students walk out of a presentation with a fresh perspective and commitment to step up to stop bullying. For more information visit: outinschools.com or td.com/lgbta.

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ARTS // CULTURE

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FILM & TV

Spooky sleuths get ‘Paranormal’ QuirkyVancouver web series Paranormal Solutions Inc. tackles zombies and killer squids Sabrina Furminger Reel People @Sabrinarmf

If the Ghostbusters and the Scooby-Doo gang got stoned together in Stanley Park and Frankensteined a high-larious single-camera sitcom, it would probably look something like Paranormal Solutions Inc. As it stands, the new web series is the twisted office comedy offspring of Nicholas Carella and Michelle Ouellet of Sociable Films, and David Milchard of Rare Little Bird Pictures. The key creative players already have a couple of impressive web series progeny between them: Carella and Ouellet were heavily involved in the Leo Award-winning The True Heroines – about 1950s housewives who have superpowers and fight crime – and Milchard is one-half of the duo behind Convos With My 2-Year-Old, which has logged more than 91 million hits to date and features grown-up re-enactments of father-toddler conversations (Milchard is the toddler). Paranormal Solutions Inc. stars Vancouver actress Julia Benson (What An Idiot) as Sarah, a bona-fide medium, and Milchard as Jared Sculder (say that name out loud for full comedic effect), who – despite having dissolved their romantic relationship – launch a business together dedicated to quashing the assorted paranormal issues of their zany clientele. The company’s tagline is “We Believe in Everything” – even though, when the series begins, Jared (unlike that other famous paranor-

REVIEW // HARDCORE HENRY

Starring Sharlto Copley, Danila Kozlovsky Directed by Ilya Naishuller A man wakes up in an airborne laboratory as a beautiful woman, claiming to be his wife and referring to him as “Henry,” attaches robotic limbs to his disfigured body. He has no memory of who he is and before long a violent psychopath and his team of

Above: Daniel Bacon stars in a scene from web series Paranormal Soultions Inc. Right: The web series, starring David Milcard as paranormal investigator Jared Sculder, was shot in Vancouver and funded by the Independent Production Fund and TELUS Optik Local. Contributed photos mal fighter whose name rhymes with Sculder) is a non-believer. “We were really inspired by Ghostbusters, but imagine if Ghostbusters was written by the guys who did It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” says Carella during Reel People’s visit to the office set in November 2014 (not a typo; that’s representative of the typical gestation period for productions in the indie sphere). “It’s a workplace comedy that happens to have monsters.” Character came before monsters. Carella and Milchard fully fleshed out the characters before they started to write the scripts. Besides Sarah and Jared, there’s Carella’s Darryn, who has no distinguishable skills and is determined to be abducted by aliens; The Interview’s Diana Bang as an infinitely practical cohenchman burst in, forcing the pair to flee in an escape pod. So begins Hardcore Henry, the closest thing you’ll ever see to a firstperson-shooter film. Henry embarks on a deadly journey to get back the apparent love of his life with the help of an avatar, Sharlto Copley clearly having a blast playing multiple roles, guiding him through the mission. Many would be quick to scoff at the format as just

16 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

op student; Daniel Bacon as Mark, a scaredy-cat cameraman; and Christina Sicoli as oddball occult specialist Madonna. The leads share the screen with a revolving door of homegrown talent, including Peter Benson, Ali Liebert, Jennifer Copping, Erica Carroll, Dave Collette, Geoff Gustafson, and Arrow star Emily Bett Rickards, whose character – Genevieve Cream – hosts the episodes as a kind of modern-day Alistair Cooke. “It’s kind of like idiots in extraordinary circumstances,” says Ouellet, who directed six of the eight episodes (Carella and Milchard directed one episode apiece). “What do these people that don’t think that paranormal incidents exist, what happens when they ﬁnd out that it all exists?” Each episode considers another “video game” flick, but director Ilya Naishuller brings enough style and kinetic energy to the plot to keep things consistently engaging. Action movies can often be grim and joyless but Henry even manages to inject some cheeky music cues and absurd humour where it seems appropriate. The results are often dizzying (remember to sit as far back as possible in the theatre) as the handheld filming

standard paranormal series fare, but from a sideways perspective. There’s an episode where the team considers the varying degrees of zombiedom (Says Carella: “How much of a zombie would you be if you’d only been a zombie for nine hours? How rotting would it be? We have these legit discussions”). There’s an episode where the team deals with a lecherous leprechaun, and another where they attempt to exorcise a ghost that has

cerebral palsy (the ghost in question is portrayed by Vancouver actor Andrew Valance, who has cerebral palsy in real life). “[That episode is] making fun of being politically correct,” says Carella. “That’s where we sit in the show. Is it okay to exorcise this ghost? We feel really bad; we don’t want to.” Unlike many web series – which, due to funding constraints, typically ﬁlm on weekends, with large gaps between shooting days

provides plenty of erratic camera movement. But, those who can endure the found footage conceit will be rewarded with a truly batshit crazy spectacle. Despite a brisk runtime, Hardcore Henry’s frantic premise grows tedious by the end and the movie won’t redefine a genre, but should garner a healthy cult following and perhaps inspire a new wave of renegade guerrilla filmmakers. W –Thor Diakow

Contributed photo

– Paranormal Solutions Inc. ﬁlmed over several weeks in 2014. “It almost feels like an indie movie,” says Bacon between scenes. Also unlike other shoestring web series, “the production value of the special and visual effects is ridiculous,” says Bacon. “Just some of the details we’ve seen – a couple of the creatures are people in masks and costume – look amazing.” Ouellet says creating Paranormal Solutions Inc. for the web has given the team the opportunity to play with different genres, which content creators generally aren’t able to do in the traditional network realm. “I think working in digital is very exciting because you can do things like mix genre with comedy,” says Ouellet, who directed the feature ﬁlm Afterparty, as well as the upcoming Prodigals, which lensed in late 2015. “We’re trying to keep the funny funny, and the scary scary.” There’s also the joy of working with friends, which is typical of the Vancouver indie scene, says Sicoli. “It’s a team of people who just want to create and get work out there,” she says. “There’s so much talent in this city. There’s so much talent that’s underused. It’s a business. It’s a game. We all get it. So we come together and produce something and get it out there.” Paranormal Solutions Inc. was funded by the Independent Production Fund and TELUS Optik Local. Besides the eight episodes in the series, related content – all specially created to expand the story and build out the Paranormal Solutions Inc. universe – will launch around the episodes. W Paranormal Solutions Inc. premieres April 19 on Milchard and Clarke’s new YouTube channel, YouTube.com/CocoMilkTV.

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REAL ESTATE //

@WESTENDERVAN

Rob Joyce MLS Diamond Master Medallion Award 2015

West End Specialist

Nobody knows the West End better!

West End Specialist Rob Joyce

Sales Associate Roger Ross

New Listing 1949 Beach #502 View! View! View! English Bay water views from every room of this 6th floor rarely available studio at Beach Town House Apartments, a heritage landmark building by the Stanley Park seawall. Glorious views to the water. Never offered in 40 years. $498,000.

New Listing 1850 Comox #503 El Cid Rarely available SW corner at 1850 Comox English Bay ocean views West of Denman. Refinished hardwood floors, wall to wall windows and an open balcony. Lots of sun and light and sea breezes. Rooftop deck & pool. Pets & rentals. $299,900.

The Ellington 1010 Burnaby #1801 Designer 2 bdrm and 2 bath and sundeck suite in the sky at The Ellington. $110K in luxurious upgrades. SE views for optimum light. 1108 SF. Pool. Pets OK. $998,000.

Patio Two Bedroom 1265 Barclay #201. Ideal West End rental suite investment with oversized patio & 1025 SF of living space. Excellent tenants. Solid concrete strata. Pets friendly. New rainscreen. $598,000.

WEST COAST

604.623.5433

www.robjoyce.ca

robjoyce@telus.net

2% OF ALL SALES PROCEEDS BENEFIT BCSPCA & WWF

LIANAY@TELUS.NET

Sutton Group - West Coast Realty

604.729.2126

W W W . L I A N A S H O W C A S E . C O M NEW LISTING FIRCREST GARDENS, $454,900 1-1633 W 8TH AVENUE

• Don’t miss this very spacious and unique facing 1 bed + flex rm + patio home in excellent Fairview location! • Perfect for the avid gardener, enjoy courtyard and landscaped garden views for your oversized patio! • Walk to Granville Island, restaurants, Fifth Ave theatre, shops & transit only blocks away! • Well laid out floor plan with large entertainment kitchen, breakfast bar, generous sized bedroom, plenty of storage insuite or utilize as flex rm. • Solid concrete construction and well managed boutique building. • New gym, sauna, lounge = lifestyle plus, includes 1 parking & 1 external storage locker.

NEW LISTING NOVA, $948,880 2302-989 BEATTY ST

• Rarely available corner, 180º view home by Bosa in the heart of Yaletown • This Lg 2 bdrm, 2 bath & den & flex rm was built for entertaining with a massive granite kitchen island & chef’s kitchen complete with gas stainless stove • Take comfort w/ the privacy & exclusivity of having only 4 suites per floor • The open concept floor plan gives you a spacious living/ dining rms w/ flr to ceiling windows, walnut engineered h/wood throughout, porcelain tiling, roller blinds, cozy fireplace & balcony perfect for BBQ’ing • Good size master w/his & hers walk-through closets to the master spa bath • Amazing gym, sauna, jacuzzi, guest suite, yoga room, pets and rental friendly.

KITS RENOVATION $408,880 206-2033 W 7TH AVE

THE LEFT BANK $674,900 203-919 STATION ST

SOLD OVER ASKING

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AQUA AT THE PARK $639,000 2203-550 PACIFIC ST

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GORGEOUS EXECUTIVE KERRISDALE TUDOR HOME $2,988,888 2488 WEST 49TH ST

SOLD FIRM FOR $350,000 OVER LIST

THE NATIONAL $998,800 1603-1128 QUEBEC ST

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BEACH AVE & ENGLISH BAY VIEW OASIS $698,888 902-907 BEACH AVE

OLYMPIC VILLAGE WATERFRONT TOWNHOME $998,800 102-118 ATHLETES WAY

SOLD FIRM FOR $56,000 OVER LIST

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RECENT SALES 1576 E 26TH AVENUE 901-1501 HOWE ST 8-3437 WEST 4TH AVE 305-1188 QUEBEC ST 741/743 E 10TH AVE PH1-868 KINGSWAY 206-2033 W 7TH AVE 406-3225 TUPPER ST 604-1238 SEYMOUR ST 2595 E 8TH AVE 507-733 W 3RD ST 606-1550 FERN ST

OPEN THURS 5:15-6:15, SAT 2-3:30

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OPEN SAT/SUN 12-1:30PM

1753 E 2ND AVE

April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 17

CARNEY’S CORNER

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LIFESTYLES //

mulTIPle offeRs! Watch the weather from your upper T! lIs floor one bedroom and den, balcony suite in downtown Arts eR v o & Cultural Zone. Enjoy stainless appliances, insuite laundry, lD laminate floors, city, mountain & water views and comfort of so 24 hour concierge & security. Work out in the well equipped gym, relax in the sauna or entertain friends in the theatre room. Underground parking is included and pets & rentals are allowed. This is a great rental property so central to Downtown, Yaletown, Gastown, Crosstown & Chinatown with easy access to airport & Canada Line rapid transit. $525,000

REAL ESTATE

jumP The queue on your doorstep, cherry blossoms outside your window with lovely outlook to heritage park and homes. This spacious one bedroom feels like part of the old character of the West End. Small strata built like a big house with you and your neighbours sharing the basement (storage and parking). With only one common wall you can enjoy all the features of a house in condo living including handy gas fireplace in floor to ceiling feature wall. Nestled amid character homes and gardens this boutique strata is centrally located in Vancouvers sought after West End steps to Robson Street! ComING sooN! CheRRy blossom fesTIval CoNTINues Your time to look into real estate consulting? Need advice on upsizing, downsizing, retirement planning, investing, senior living, strata dissolution, developer buyout, strata, coop, leasehold, undivided interest; whatever your issue—we can help! sPRING has sPRuNG! Buyers waiting for suites in the El Cid, Huntington, Sandpiper and Stratford’s concrete hirises off Denman. There is also a shortage of two bedrooms in the area. Please call if you or anyone you know is considering a move. Qualified local buyers ready to act!

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West End Neighbours

New info always available on the website; an opportunity for community to stay in touch and keep up on local issues. www.westendneighbours.ca

TALK TO LIZ CARNEY 685-5951/603-3095

604

Niz.cKrnGL@cGntHrL21.cK • www.vancouvercondo.com CGntHrL 21 In TJwn RGKNtL • 421 PKciFic • 1030 DGnMKn

In Town Realty

OPEN HOUSE New park at Smithe and Richards The Vancouver Park Board is developing a new 0.8-acre park in the downtown core at the intersection of Smithe and Richards streets. The park will: · Serve as a place for community recreation, culture, and tranquility in the bustling neighbourhood · Improve the liveability of the area and our city · Increase access to nature The public is invited to see the preferred park design Tuesday, April 19, 4:30 – 8:30 pm ArtStarts Gallery (main floor), 808 Richards St.

Molson brewery bought by Concord Pacific for $185M EMMA CRAWFORD HAMPEL @emmahampelbiv

The mystery has been solved: it was Concord Pacific, on Burrard Street, with $185 million. In November, it was reported that the Molson brewery had been sold for well over $100 million over assessed value to an undisclosed buyer. At that time, rumour had it that the sale price was $185 million – a figure that has now been confirmed. The deal closed March 31. According to documents from real estate market analysis service RealNet, as of the sale date, the assessed value of the building was $15.4 million and the land was worth $33.6 million, for a total assessment of $49 million. A Concord spokesperson has confirmed that Concord will lease back to the property to Molson to continue to operate until a new brewery is built. Kirk Kuester, executive managing director for Colliers International Vancouver, said Colliers represented Molson in the transaction and would not be providing any further comment on the sale. Concord Pacific, one of BC’s largest new-home developers, said it plans to

The Molson brewery at Burrards and Cornwall was sold to condo developer Concord Pacific for $185 million in November. Chung Chow photo “create a…sustainable mixeduse addition to Vancouver,” according to a statement from Concord senior vicepresident of development Peter Webb. “The Concord Paciﬁc group’s venture capital arm invests actively in the IT, telecom and green technology industries,”Webb said. “Concord owns and operates Maximizer, a Vancouver-based IT company, Novus Entertainment, a local telecom company servicing thousands of households in Vancouver as well as Concord Green Energy with green power generating projects across the county. “Concord’s long-term

Real Estate Opens

Downtown FOR MORE INFORMATION: Visit vancouver.ca/smitherichards Phone 3-1-1 Email SmitheRichards@vancouver.ca

Fairview

West End

2309-989 Beatty St., 2 bdrm + den, $948,880,Sat & Sun 12-1:30pm 17

1050 Chilco St., 1 bdrm, $359,900, Sat 2-4pm

1402-1501 Howe St., 2 bdrm, $1,788,000, Sat & Sun 2-4pm 19

203-1147 Nelson St., 2 bdrm, $568,000,Thurs 6-7:30, Fri 11-12pm, Sat & Sun 2-4pm 19

Yaletown

vision is to attract knowledgebased local and global tech companies to this site.” However, in terms of turning the site into mixed-use property, the City of Vancouver emailed a statement saying it has not received a rezoning application for the site. “The property is zoned industrial and shown in the regional context statement as industrial, any change to that would require a regional amendment by Metro Vancouver,” the statement said. “The City’s policies for these lands are set, and staff are not contemplating any changes to current policies.” W -Courtesy of Business in Vancouver

3303-1372 Seymour St, 1 bdrm, $738,000, Sat & Sun 2-4pm

1-1633W. 8th Ave., 1 bdrm, $459,900,Thurs 5:15-6:15, 17 Sat 2-3:30pm

Westwood Plateau

1563 Lodgepole Pl., Coquitlam, 6 bdrm, $1,498,800, 15 Sat & Sun 2-5pm

STEPHEN BURKE YOUR SUITE PEACE AND QUIET SUTTON GROUP - WEST COAST REALTY

301-1508 W BROADWAY

604-714-1700

www.stephenburke.com

604-551-4190

SOLD HERE!

ACTUAL VIEW FROM SUITE

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House-size living room, open dining Master BR w/ custom walk-in closet Stunning dble sink ensuite bath, shwr 2nd BR for guests, media, office, retreat Exclusive100%owneroccupiedbuilding

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Much coveted West of Denman area 1 block to Park Bay,Beach & Seawall Tennis, golf, lawn bowling at Park entry Walk to shops & cafes on Denman Bright 1 bedroom w/walls of windows

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Open plan galley kitchen, upgraded cabs Tile entry, Hardwood floors throughout Adult oriented, no pet or rental building Well-maintained building on no thru-street 1 storage & 1 rented parking if needed

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REAL ESTATE //

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www.dexterrealty.com 604-689-8226 Yaletown 604-336-3539 Main Street 604-263-1144 Kerrisdale

Taking our Listings Global

Melany Sue-Johnson 604-263-1144

204-528 BEATTY ST

$568,000 501-1045 HARO ST

This bright spacious loft is ideally located in Crosstown. Building is a 1906 heritage conversion. Sandblasted brick walls and exposed timber beams are accented with fir wood flooring and original double-hung sash windows. Open concept unit with S/S Bosch appliances, gas stove and lots of storage. Includes secure, convenient bike locker and storage unit. Steps away from skytrain and everything downtown Vancouver has to offer in dining and entertainment.

2609-1480 HOWE ST

ed@loftsvancouver.com www.loftsvancouver.com

2102-125 MILROSS AVE. NEW LISTING Fabulous 1,606 sq.ft. sub-penthouse at CREEKSIDE by BOSA Developments. 3 bed, 2 bath, 2 parking , 4 balconies. Panoramic 180 degree South West and North views. Showings by appointment only.

$1,599,900

Marilou Appleby 604-318-9566

1402-1501 HOWE ST

NEW LISTING

Check out our website, www.dexterrealty.com for current market condition updates.

NEW LISTING

4202-1111 ALBERNI ST NEW LISTING $2,880,000

$1,788,000

$538,000

OCEANSIDE LIVING— Unbeatable location is one of the many features this stunning and spacious 2 bed/ 3 bath has to offer. Whether it is preparing for the start of your day or relaxing after a long day at the office. You will be sure to find solace on the remarkable South facing balcony. Take a stroll to one of Yaletown’s many hotspots or take a quick ferry ride over beautiful False Creek to the fresh and local markets of Granville Island. This 1617 sq.ft. gem is a rare opportunity in a surprisingly quiet enclave in the heart of Yaletown.

Commercial Real Estate Needs? Dexter Associates Realty’s

Ed Gramauskas Cell: 604-618-9727

to set up your business or retail store, or are looking to buy an investment property we can help you. Call us at 604-689-8226 today.

Details & Photos of all lofts for sale in Vancouver

commercial team will answer all of your questions and will help with

PERSONAL REAL ESTATE CORPORATION

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Thanks To Our Clients and Supporters In Helping Us Achieve Top 100 RE/MAX Realtors in Western Canada 2014 & 2015!

CURRENT RATES

(Prime less 0.50%)

The Epitome of Style and Class – Shangri-La Luxury Residences! RARELY available, NW facing ICONIC SUB-PENTHOUSE. This 2 bed + Family room offers the BEST layout and the BEST corner with EXPANSIVE 270 degree views of English Bay Water to Coal Harbour to NS Mountains which can all be enjoyed from Inside your Home or Outside on your Generous Balcony. Well-appointed finishings for the most discerning owner – enjoy A/C, floor-to-ceiling windows, custom millwork, gourmet chef’s kitchen with S/S Miele & Subzero appliances & spa inspired bathrooms. This Estate Home has been generously updated with Built-ins and Extensive Millwork. 5 Star living w/ hotel amenities including 24HR concierge, fitness centre, infinity pool, CHI the Spa & restaurants/lounges. Shop boutique designer shops & Urban Fare at your doorstep. Amazing & RARE 2 side-by-side parking stalls & 2 ATTACHED storage lockers. The list goes on and on…. Call now for viewing.

loftsvancouver.com

MAUREEN YOUNG

2.44% 2.20%

$817,800

PROXIMITY – The newest project from Bastion Development, completing spring 2016. PROXIMITY features 9’ ceilings & gourmet kitchens that include: Caesarstone counter tops with FULL SIZE Fisher Paykel, Bosch & GE appliances. Sleek Hydrocork vinyl flooring throughout. Spa inspired bathrooms, featuring Moen fixtures. Chill in the Club House or outside in Communal garden plots. Be a part of the new thriving community and lifestyle that is South East False Creek. Steps from the seawall, shopping, dining and recreation. PROXIMITY to everything in False Creek. Sales Center open noon to 5pm every day but Friday.

www.surinderholat.com

Louis Dupuis 604-842-3066

OPEN SAT & SUN 2-4PM

JUST LISTED – You’ve heard it before….but ER this place won’t last long! RICHARDS LIVING OV G D built in 2011….LIKE NEW, but NO GST! This N L I SO ASK 1 bedroom and office/storage is ready for you to move into today, with Stainless steel appliances, granite countertops in the Kitchen & Bathroom. Large covered balcony with doors to the Living room and Bedroom. Large windows with great natural light. Steps to Yaletown, shopping, great restaurants, entertainment, transportation & recreation. 1 Parking spot and the balance of the 2-5-10 year New Home Warranty. Building amenities include a 9th floor Garden courtyard, fitness centre and Amenities room. Rentals allowed and your pets are welcome too.

3 Year Variable

$899,000

VANCOUVER HOUSE Exceptional, False Creek and city view home in the most iconic new development in the city’s history. Assignment, call for details.

204-1788 ONTARIO ST

Surinder Holat 604-263-1144

Connie McGinley 604-263-1144

5 Year Fixed

$299,000

NEW LISTING

OUTSTANDING STUDIO – Newly renovated, open concept studio with massive outdoor space. Best location possible!

Ed Gramauskas 604-618-9727

504-1088 RICHARDS ST

Martin Ramond 604-263-1144

604-318-5226

A Sophisticated Approach to Lifestyle Attainment. Professional Advisement and Marketing of Fine Vancouver Properties. Number One Realtor in Downtown Office 2012-2015 2014 & 2015 RE/MAX Chairman’s Club Award Winner

CURRENT LISTINGS:

FALSE CREEK

Rates subject to change without notice. O.A.C.

More on My Website at: www.MichaelDowling.ca

WESTWOOD PLATEAU NEW LISTING!

WESTWOOD PLATEAU NEW PRICE!

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WEST END NEW LISTING!

SOLD WAY OVER ASKING IN 1 WEEK! 2936 Bighorn Pl, Coquitlam, $1,388,800

OPEN SAT & SUN 2-5PM 1563 Lodgepole Pl, Coquitlam, $1,498,800

OPEN SAT & SUN 2-4PM 3303-1372 Seymour St, “The Mark,” $738,000

FIRST OPENS THURS 6-7:30PM, FRI 11AM-12PM, SAT & SUN 2-4PM 203-1147 Nelson St, “The Somerset,” $568,000

DIDYOU KNOW?

When buying a home you can include renovation costs in your mortgage? Ask me about how the Purchase Plus Improvements mortgage can work for you when you are purchasing a home that needs renovations or your personal touch.

Contact me for all your purchase, refinance and renewal options. Other rates and terms available.

CALL 604-805-5888

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SOLD 99% OF ASKING PRICE SOLD FULL PRICE! 1303-110 Switchmen St, 408-1680 West 4th Ave, “The Lido,” $828,000 “The Mantra,” $578,800

• Like New, Stunning Designer Upgraded 920SQFT 2 Bed, 2 Bath • West Facing, Unobstructed False Creek Ocean Views • Luxury Miele Appliances, Finishings, & Air Conditioning! • 1 Parking, 1 Storage, Pets Allowed! • Rentals Allowed, (Currently Tenanted) • The “Lido” By Bosa - Best Building in False-creek! • 5 Star Amenities – Concierge, Business Center, Indoor Pool!

Crest Westside Ltd.

• Gorgeous City & FireworksViews— Luxury 1 Bed, Den & Bonus Flex by Cressy! • 7YearYoung,Almost 700SQFT • Beautiful Zen-Like Appointments and Finishings • Built-in Central Air-Conditioning • 1 Owner—Immaculately Kept—Like New! • 1 Parking, 1 Storage Locker, Pets and Rentals OK! • Walk to Famous 4th Ave Shops, Granville Island, Movies • New No Frills Grocery Store Right At Your Door!

Prepare to be MOVED™.

• Stunning Executive View Home • Short, Beautiful Cul-D-Sac Near Pinetree Elementary • 3848 SQFT 5 Beds (3 Up), 4 Baths • 3 Levels With 180 Degree Views • New Roof, Fences, Floorings • Easily Suiteable - Convert to 6 Bedroom • Hiking Trail & Suspension Bridge 15 Metres Away • Close to Schools, Bus Transit and 6 min to New Skytrain • Welcome Home!

• Executive Custom “Show Home” 4314 SQFT • Best Cul-D-Sac. Backs Onto “Street of Dreams” • 6 Beds (4 Up) 2 Down (7th Bed on Main Possible) • Many Updates, Gorgeous Finishings, Solid Oak Floors. • Close To Best Schools, Parks Quiet Family Yard • Views To Mount Baker • Welcome Home!

• Spectacular Executive Upper 1 Bdrm & Den • 1 Year Young Modern Skyscraper On False-creek • 650SQFT With Stunning English Bay & Sunset Views • Air Conditioning and Designer High-End Package • Great Floorplan With Open Feel • Floor-to-Ceiling Windows and High Ceilings • Special Feel Perched Above it All • 10,000 SQFT Spa, High-End Gym, Pool • 1 Parking, Rentals and Pets Allowed • Hot Downtown South Near Beach District

Call Us Today for a Confidential Needs Assessment and Market Analysis

• Beautifully Update 900SQFT 2 Bed & 2 Full Bath • Across From Nelson Park & Lord Roberts Annex Elementary & Daycare • Gorgeous New Kitchen With Granite & Shaker Cabinets • Updated Bathroom, Large Covered West Facing Balcony • New Rainscreen & Re-Piped,Well Run • Pets (2 Dogs) & Rentals Allowed! • Flat Part of West End, Steps To St. Pauls, Davie, Robson,YMCA, Scotia Theatres.

604-787-5568

www.MichaelDowling.ca April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 19

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Since 75 per cent of the world is lactose intolerant, maybe we should consider alternative calcium sources. iStock photo

Do we really need dairy? Patty Javier Gomez Whole Nourishment

@WholeNourishBC

#730-1285 W. Broadway 604-738-1012 integrative.ca / stepheninaba.com

Do we really need dairy? I feel like this a question that we seldom ask ourselves. And

if we do, we usually come up with a quick yes, after all, where else would we get our calcium and protein from, right? There is much debate about whether or not we can get enough calcium from a whole food, plant-based diet that does not include dairy. In fact, it’s something vegans hear all too often. For decades we have been told that dairy is the answer to a balanced diet and healthy lifestyle, and although it has been sold to us as a holy truth, is it? Let’s take a look at milk. One could argue that since we are the only species to drink milk in adulthood and the only species to drink milk from another species, it’s a bit unnatural. Most people drink cow’s milk, which is formulated for growing calves. Last I checked human babies were not calves, and adults do not need to grow, unless I missed something in my anatomy and biology classes. As we age, most of us start slowly losing the ability to breakdown lactose, thus becoming lactose intolerant;

but before nature even takes it’s course, many already suffer from dairy allergies or intolerances that they either ignore or don’t notice, letting it cause havoc on their system. So, why are we being told to consume dairy – especially milk – in large amounts on a daily basis? Because dairy is a huge industry, folks. So big that they have had a part in creating our food guide, which encourages the intake of dairy as a means of getting our regular calcium intake, even though there are a lot of other great sources of calcium out there. Since various studies put the worldwide rate for lactose intolerance at close to 75 per cent, maybe we should at the very least start cutting down. After all, the majority of humans on this planet are prone to uncomfortable digestive symptoms (and other nasty stuff) because they are unable to digest the natural lactose sugar found in dairy products. But if you like the stuff, and can digest it, then I

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would suggest getting your dairy from grass-fed, local, ethically-raised teats. Not all milk and dairy products are the same, and they vary greatly in quality depending on how the cows were raised and fed. Take raw milk for example; this is milk that has not been pasteurized. Pasteurization is the process in which the milk is brieﬂy heated to kill potentially harmful pathogens. However, it also destroys many of the health beneﬁts, and it is illegal to sell raw milk. The authorities take it quite seriously, to the point where there are lawsuits and in some cases jail time... for milk. I understand the idea of trying to keep the public “safe,” but sometimes I feel like there are other things that require the attention of our justice system. If you are now turned off milk or weren’t partaking anyway, but are still wondering where your calcium can come from, some great foods to add to your diet include sesame seeds, broccoli, leafy greens, sardines and turnip greens. W

RECIPE // GARLIC SAGE BROCCOLI Ingredients: < I (0CB4 (9ABBA,1 < H B,A/=6 7+9,1B 5B9064=@2 < I 3(6? A,1/= A1, < " 6+7= ,=+/=6 5:1C=,D B032 < >=+ 6+,3 +C@ ?=??=9 Directions: < >3=+E (9ABBA,1 +C@ ?,+B= AC BAA-1= 64==3 G4=C DA0 B+C ?03 + :A9- 349A074 13* < 8C + 6E+,, (AG,' E1F A,1/= A1, +C@ +,, A34=9 1C79=@1=C36* < )A09 A,1/= A1, E1F309= A/=9 3A? A: (9ABBA,1* < $+-= +3 !JJ # :A9 IJ.IH E1C03=6*

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LIFESTYLES //

@WESTENDERVAN

SEX

Free Will Astrology Ask Mish: Growing up By Rob Brezsny “When I discover who I am, I’ll be free,” said novelist Ralph Ellison. Would you consider making that a paramount theme in the coming weeks? Will you keep it in the forefront of your mind, and be vigilant for juicy clues that might show up in the experiences headed your way? In suggesting that you do, I’m not guaranteeing that you will gather numerous extravagant insights about your true identity and thereby achieve a blissful eruption of total liberation. But I suspect that at the very least you will understand previously hidden mysteries about your primal nature. And as they come into focus, you will indeed be led in the direction of cathartic emancipation.

Adyashanti is my favorite mind-scrambling philosopher. One of his doses of crazy wisdom is just what you need to hear right now. “Whatever you resist you become,” he says. “If you resist anger, you are always angry. If you resist sadness, you are always sad. If you resist suffering, you are always suffering. If you resist confusion, you are always confused. We think that we resist certain states because they are there, but actually they are there because we resist them.” Can you wrap your imagination around Adyashanti’s counsel, Libra? I hope so, because the key to dissipating at least some of the dicey stuff that has been tweaking you lately is to STOP RESISTING IT!

“We never know the wine we are becoming while we are being crushed like grapes,” said author Henri Nouwen. I don’t think that’s true in your case, Taurus. Any minute now, you could get a clear intuition about what wine you will ultimately turn into once the grapecrushing stage ends. So my advice is to expect that clear intuition. Once you’re in possession of it, I bet the crushing will begin to feel more like a massage – maybe even a series of strong but tender caresses.

During every election season, media pundits exult in criticizing candidates who have altered their opinions about important issues. This puzzles me. In my understanding, an intelligent human is always learning new information about how the world works, and is therefore constantly evolving his or her beliefs and ideas. I don’t trust people who stubbornly cling to all of their musty dogmas. I bring this to your attention, Scorpio, because the coming weeks will be an especially ripe time for you to change your mind about a few things, some of them rather important. Be alert for the cues and clues that will activate dormant aspects of your wisdom. Be eager to see further and deeper.

Your sustaining mantra for the coming weeks comes from Swedish poet Tomas Tranströmer: “I am not empty; I am open.” Say that aloud whenever you’re inclined to feel lonely or lost. “I am not empty; I am open.” Whisper it to yourself as you wonder about the things that used to be important but no longer are. “I am not empty; I am open.” Allow it to loop through your imagination like a catchy song lyric whenever you’re tempted to feel melancholy about vanished certainties or unavailable stabilizers or missing fillers. “I am not empty; I am open.”

According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you are close to tapping into hidden powers, dormant talents, and future knowledge. Truths that have been off-limits are on the verge of catching your attention and revealing themselves. Secrets you have been concealing from yourself are ready to be plucked and transformed. And now I will tell you a trick you can use that will enable you to fully cash in on these pregnant possibilities: Don’t adopt a passive wait-and-see attitude. Don’t expect everything to happen on its own. Instead, be a willful magician who aggressively collects and activates the potential gifts.

This would be a perfect moment to give yourself a new nickname like “Sugar Pepper” or “Honey Chili” or “Itchy Sweet.” It’s also a favorable time to explore the joys of running in slow motion or getting a tattoo of a fierce howling bunny or having gentle sex standing up. This phase of your cycle is most likely to unfold with maximum effectiveness if you play along with its complicated, sometimes paradoxical twists and turns. The more willing you are to celebrate life’s riddles as blessings in disguise, the more likely you’ll be to use the riddles to your advantage.

Right about now you might be feeling a bit extreme, maybe even zealous or melodramatic. I wouldn’t be surprised if you were tempted to make outlandish expostulations similar to those that the poet Arthur Rimbaud articulated in one of his histrionic poems: “What beast must I worship? What sacred images should I destroy? What hearts shall I break? What lies am I supposed to believe?” I encourage you to articulate salty sentiments like these in the coming days – with the understanding that by venting your intensity you won’t need to actually act it all out in real life. In other words, allow your fantasy life and creative artistry to be boisterous outlets for emotions that shouldn’t necessarily get translated into literal behavior.

Friedrich Nietzsche published his first book, The Birth of Tragedy, in 1872, when he was 28 years old. In 1886, he put out a revised edition that included a preface entitled “An Attempt at Self-Criticism.” In this unprecedented essay, he said that he now found his text “clumsy and embarrassing, its images frenzied and confused, sentimental, uneven in pace, so sure of its convictions that it is above any need for proof.” And yet he also glorified The Birth of Tragedy, praising it for its powerful impact on the world, for its “strange knack of seeking out its fellow-revelers and enticing them on to new secret paths and dancing-places.” In accordance with the astrological omens, Sagittarius, I invite you to engage in an equally brave and celebratory re-evaluation of some of your earlier life and work.

“Go back to where you started and learn to love it more.” So advised Thaddeus Golas in his book The Lazy Man’s Guide to Enlightenment. I think that’s exactly what you should do right now, Capricorn. To undertake such a quest would reap long-lasting benefits. Here’s what I propose: First, identify three dreams that are important for your future. Next, brainstorm about how you could return to the roots of your relationships with them. Finally, reinvigorate your love for those dreams. Supercharge your excitement about them.

“What am I doing here in mid-air?” asks Ted Hughes in his poem “Wodwo.” Right about now you might have an urge to wonder that yourself. The challenging part of your situation is that you’re unanchored, unable to find a firm footing. The fun part is that you have an unusual amount of leeway to improvise and experiment. Here’s a suggestion: Why not focus on the fun part for now? You just may find that doing so will minimize the unsettled feelings. I suspect that as a result you will also be able to accomplish some interesting and unexpected work.

How many fireflies would you have to gather together in order to create a light as bright as the sun? Entomologist Cole Gilbert estimates the number to be 14,286,000,000. That’s probably beyond your ability to accomplish, Pisces, so I don’t recommend you attempt it. But I bet you could pull off a more modest feat with a similar theme: accumulating a lot of small influences that add up to a big effect. Now is an excellent time to capitalize on the power of gradual, incremental progress.

Apr. 7: Billie Holliday (101) Apr. 8: Izzy Stradlin (54) Apr. 9: Hugh Hefner (90) Apr. 10: Mandy Moore (32) Apr. 11: Lights (29) Apr. 12: David Letterman (69) Apr. 13: Allison Williams (28)

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queer in the Bible Belt Sex with Mish Way

@MyszkaWay

I’m 14-years-old and in high school, and I need some advice. Being queer in high school is hard, especially when you live in the Bible Belt and I was just wondering if you had any tips to help me deal with harassment from fellow students? (Not necessarily bad harassment, just rumours and other various forms of being rude.) I grew up in North Vancouver, which, compared to the Bible Belt, is like the loudest, gayest cruise ship sailing through an ocean of rainbows while blasting Turbonegro at full volume. I have spent lots of time in the South, but I did not grow up there, let alone grow up queer there. However, my husband lived his teenage years in the Bible Belt, so when I got your question I turned to him. My husband was born in Arkansas, but his family bounced from California to Texas to Colorado. Eventually, they relocated back to Booneville, Arkansas, when my husband was 14 years old and a full blown teenage punk. He had a mohawk, rode a skateboard, listened to Negative Approach and got called a faggot every day by redneck jocks. Booneville had a population of a few thousand people, and he had to toughen the fuck up to everyone because the only kid on his side was another “freak”: the one black kid in town. (His family was eventually driven from Booneville via a burning cross on their front lawn, but that’s a whole other story.) My husband and his mohawk stood out as exactly that. The principal made him cut his hair. He learned how to take a beating. He got really good with knives and how to use his scrawny body in his favor. His skin got tough. “He should ﬁnd an alternative route home from school to avoid bullshit and immediately start hanging out in the closest major city,” my husband said when I read your question. “Getting out of your high school scene and befriending people in a more open-minded place is your best bet.” This is what he did. Then, he ended up with a 22-yearold girlfriend at the age of 14. (Again, a whole other story.) High school sucks. Period. Anyone who looks back on

that time as their glory days is a deep loser. Going to class for eight hours a day? Being baby-sat by teachers? Hand jobs and wine coolers? Please. Life is so much more than embarrassing sex and getting caught stealing your mom’s Tempo. I don’t want to get all Dan Savage on you and tell you “it gets better” because you know that it does. You just have to survive through the next few years before you can really live. Have you come out to your family? Do you have anyone in your family who is supportive? If not, do you have some friends who are? Anyone in your life whom you can be honest with is going to be your saving grace. I hope you have at least one of these people you can spill your guts to. As for deﬂecting rumors of your queerness, there is not much you can do besides fuck a chick or get a chick to pretend she fucked you. I don’t suggest either (isn’t there a really bad movie based on that premise?). Everyone gets teased in high school. It’s what makes you stronger. I remember this guy at my high school called me a lesbian every single day and relentlessly fucked with me. It totally killed my conﬁdence for a few years there. Then, once I got my braces off and my tits went from zero to C-cup, he asked me out.

Turning that boy down was THE moment. You’ll eventually get one of these. Maybe it will be at the end of school or maybe in 10 years, but either way, one of those closeted homo assholes who currently teases you is going to walk into a bar you are at and hit on you, and you are going to get to shut him down. Even if this doesn’t happen, your revenge will be living a cool, successful life far away from people who are so boring they can’t even think of a more original insult than “faggot.” I love you. I don’t know you but I love you for being brave enough to be exactly who you are and ignore the bullshit. Who cares what these people think. Right now, they are helping you develop a tougher skin and crazy strong ambition. You will come out a better person for all of this. For now, ﬁnd a sneaky route home, ﬁght back if anyone threatens you and start hanging out in the nearest major city. Bring a friend you trust and love and go bananas. Life is hard and people are assholes. This is just phase one. Love, Mish

EMAIL MISH Send Mish your own sex questions and queries to sex@westender.com

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VALLEY TRAFFIC SYSTEMS Apply in person 9770-199A St, Langley Fax or Email resume: 604-513-3661 darlene@valleytraffic.ca

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RESTAURANT/ HOTEL F/T Food Service Supervisor To Dine For Eatery, 1 yr exp. or equivalent skill, high school completion required.$13-16/hr, 604-568-7106 email: todine4hr@hotmail.com

TRUTH IN EMPLOYMENT ADVERTISING Glacier Media Group makes every effort to ensure you are responding to a reputable and legitimate job opportunity. If you suspect that an ad to which you have responded is misleading, here are some hints to remember. Legitimate employers do not ask for money as part of the application process; do not send money; do not give any credit card information; or call a 900 number in order to respond to an employment ad. Job opportunity ads are salary based and do not require an investment. If you have responded to an ad which you believe to be misleading please call the: Better Business Bureau at 604-682-2711 Monday to Friday, 9am - 3pm or email: inquiries@bbbvan.org and they will investigate.

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LEGAL U-Haul Moving Center Vancouver claims a Landlords Contractual Lien against the following persons goods in storage at 1070 SE Marine Dr., Vancouver, BC, Tel: 604-325-6526. Auction is subject to cancellation at anytime without notice. 0264 Cynthia Arbeau, 3677 Wellington Ave., Vancouver, BC 0456 Peter Edwin Small, 205 East 10th Ave., Vancouver, BC 0626 Shaun Ignas, 1130 Prince Rupert Blvd., Prince Rupert, BC 0639 Jordan Pearce, 555 Homer St., Vancouver, BC 0656 Richie Chin-Chye Ang, 4180 Dansforth Dr., Vancouver, BC 0696 Hali Cormack, 3701 Princess Ave., N. Vancouver, BC 0731 Zhi Ye Dong, #424 - 9009 Cornerstone, Burnaby, BC 0861 Maria Montagano, 7465 14th Ave., Burnaby, BC 0928 Kenneth Gregg Johns, 940B 70th Ave., W. Vancouver, BC 1564 Steven Christensen, 4990 Lorraine Ave., Burnaby, BC 2159 Collin Campbell, 2394 East 23rd Ave., Vancouver, BC 2228 Neil Vernon K. Adams, 8820 No. 1 Rd., Richmond, BC 3112 Sukdan Baek, 4044 Fir St., Burnaby, BC 3668 Robert Fry, #311 - 6630 Terlford Ave., Burnaby, BC AA4250AMichelle/Diane Ball/Macfarlane2669 Phillips Ave., Burnaby, BC A sale will take place at the storage location on Friday, April 22, 2016. Viewing 10:00AM12:00PM. Sealed bids will be opened at 12:30PM. Room contents are personal/household goods unless noted otherwise. Bids will be for entire contents of each locker unit.

Celebrate your 29C7> 947:D 27G3<H? Create a personal memorial fund =H DE36@4G 3 <69A>;B4>F4G <3583FG4 3E 22 W April 14 - April 20, 2016

classifieds.wevancouver.com SUMMONS (FAMILY LAW)

IN THE UNIFIED COURTS OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA FOR COUNTY OF SAN MATEO – FAMILY LAW DIVISION IN RE THE MARRIAGE OF: MARK LADAS and PETA-SHAUGHN-MARIE LADAS (aka: Hill, Patel or Drummond) Case No. FAM0131975 Notice to Respondent: PETA-SHAUGHN-MARIE LADAS (AKA: HILL, PATEL, OR DRUMMOND You have been sued. Read the information below. Petitioner’s name is: Mark Ladas You have 30 calendar days after this Summons and Petition are served on you to file a Response (form FL-120) at the court and have a copy served on the petitioner. A letter, phone call, or court appearance will not protect you. If you do not file your Response on time, the court may make orders affecting your marriage or domestic partnership, your property, and custody of your children. You may be ordered to pay support and attorney fees and costs. For legal advice, contact a lawyer immediately. Get help finding a lawyer at the California Courts Online Self-Help Center (www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp), at the California Legal Services website (www.lawhelpca.org), or by contacting your local county bar association. 1.The name and address of the court are Superior Court of California 400 County Center Redwood City, CA 94063 2.The name address, and telephone number of the petitioner’s attorney, or the petitioner without an attorney are: Robert J. Bruening, Esq. 441 First Avenue/P.O. Box 1290 San Mateo, CA 94401-1290 (650) 343-6400

SALES/AGENTS

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MARKETPLACE

PETS

ANTIQUES WE BUY ANTIQUES Generous prices paid for Fine Art, Silver, Jewellery, Military Medals, Militaria, Coin Collections, pre 1910 Furniture & Lighting, etc. Est. in 1990. We make house calls. Call David 604-716-8032 www.britishfineart andantiques.ca

FOR SALE - MISC

ALL SMALL BREED PUPS Local, Non-Shedding and Vet Checked. 604-590-3727 www.puppiesfishcritters.com

REAL ESTATE

HOUSES FOR SALE

POLE BARNS, Shops, steel buildings metal clad or fabric clad. Complete supply and installation. Call John at 403-998-7907; jcameron@ advancebuildings.com REFORESTATION NURSERY SEEDLINGS of hardy trees, shrubs, & berries for shelterbelts or landscaping. Spruce & Pine from $0.99/tree. Free Shipping. Replacement guarantee. 1-866-873-3846 or www.treetime.ca SAWMILLS from only $4,397 Make money & save money with your own bandmill - Cut lumber any dimension. In stock ready to ship. FREE Info & DVD: www.NorwoodSawmills.com/400OT 1-800-566-6899 Ext:400OT STEEL BUILDING SALE... “Clear Out Pricing in Effect Now!” 20X20 $5,444 25X26 $6,275 30X30 $8,489 32X34 $10,328 42X50 $15,866. One end wall included. Pioneer Steel 1-800-668-5422 www.pioneersteel.ca

Due to space restrictions, there is no puzzle this issue. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.

3429 Thurston Pl. Abbotsford 3 storey, 6+1 br. Quiet cul de sac. Bsmt rents $1,050/mo $829,900 Call 604-807-4829

ADVERTISING POLICIES

All advertising published in this newspaper is accepted on the premise that the merchandise and services offered are accurately described and willingly sold to buyers at the advertised prices. Advertisers are aware of these conditions. Advertising that does not conform to these standards or that is deceptive or misleading, is never knowingly accepted. If any reader encounters non-compliance with these standards we ask that you inform the Publisher of this newspaper and The Advertising Standards Council of B.C. OMISSION AND ERROR: The publishers do not guarantee the insertion of a particular advertisement on a specified date, or at all, although every effort will be made to meet the wishes of the advertisers. Further, the publishers do not accept liability for any loss of damage caused by an error or inaccuracy in the printing of an advertisement beyond the amount paid for the space actually occupied by the portion of the advertisement in which the error occurred. Any corrections of changes will be made in the next available issue. The Westender will be responsible for only one incorrect insertion with liability limited to that portion of the advertisement affected by the error. Request for adjustments or corrections on charges must be made within 30 days of the ad’s expiration. For best results please check your ad for accuracy the first day it appears. Refunds made only after 7 business days notice!

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HOME SERVICES HANDYPERSON

BAJ Mini Excavating Demo •Drainage •Dry Bsmt. Remove •Concrete •Retain Walls & •Blacktop • 604-779-7816

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ELECTRICAL YOUR ELECTRICIAN $29 Service Call. Lic#89402. Fast same day service. Insured. Guar’d. We love small jobs. 604-568-1899

FLOORING Hardwood Floor Refinishing Repairs & Staining Installation Free Estimates Century Hardwood Floors 604-376-7224

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LANDSCAPING

Able Boys Landscaping Ltd Bobcat, turf, Cedar fence, Tree trimming, Asphalt Call (604)377-3107

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HANDYMAN Reno, kitchen, bath, plumbing, countertop, floors, paint, etc. Mic, 604-725-3127

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BUSINESS SERVICES BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES GET FREE VENDING MACHINES. Can Earn $100,000.00 + Per Year, ALL CASH. Protected Territories. Locations Provided. Full Details CALL NOW! 1-866-6686629 or visit our Website WWW.TCVEND.COM

FINANCIAL SERVICES

HIP OR KNEE Replacement? Arthritic Conditions/COPD? Restrictions in Walking/ Dressing? Disability Tax Credit $2,000 Tax Credit $20,000 Refund. For assistance! 1-844-453-5372.

LARGE FUND

Borrowers Wanted. Start saving hundreds of dollars today! We can easily approve you by phone. 1st, 2nd or 3rd mortgage money is available right now. Rates start at Prime. Equity counts. We don’t rely on credit, age or income. CALL ANYTIME 1-800-639-2274 or 604-430-1498 Apply online at www.capitaldirect.ca

Healthcare Documentation Specialists in huge demand. Employers prefer CanScribe graduates. A great workfrom-home career! Train with Canada’s best-rated program. Enroll today. www.canscribe.com. 1.800.466.1535. info@canscribe.com MEDICAL TRANSCRIPTION! In-demand career! Employers have work-at-home positions available. Get the online training you need from an employer-trusted program. Visit:CareerStep.ca/MT or 1-855-7683362 to start training for your work-at-home career today!

FRANCHISES + &65#- %#A.-?6.#, '6#A7/.45 $<<?6-BA.-;

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HEALTH & BEAUTY

ACUPUNCTURE, ENERGY Massage, Facial Rejuvenation, Slimming Treatment. Ins. acc. $68/120 mins. 604-249-1307

LEGAL SERVICES

RENOS & HOME IMPROVEMENT

MOVING #%@*($' #!;%"& 6-.3+%35 / 7+%!&35 / 9!,,8 "'!-)( =98F9E -F.7 2)+>BF 6*.2, 0 6*+1 $-%#2+.3 4*:3% +%)&#$!,' 0 *(!%$"- $-%.*!+# 7<F85:/7.3<4D,58

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PAINTING/ WALLPAPER

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PLUMBING QUALITY PLUMBING AND ELECTRICAL • 35 Years Experience • 24/7 Service • $45 per hour Call 604-518-5413

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FERREIRA HOME IMPROVEMENTS

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JACK’S RUBBISH REMOVAL Household Junk Specialist! Fast, Friendly & cheap. Call 604-266-4444

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DOMESTIC CARS

2008 Chevrolet Aveo Serviced @ The GM Store 42k Auto New tires brakes $5999. 778-239-3724

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April 14 - April 20, 2016 W 23

WEEKLY SPECIALS Prices Effective April 14 to April 20, 2016.

100% BC Owned and Operated PRODUCE

MEAT Imported Raspberries

Extra Lean Organic Ground Chicken

Organic Cara Cara Red Navel Oranges from California

170g package

3.98

previously frozen

HOT 1.98lb/ PRICE 4.37kg

9.99lb/ 22.02kg

DELI

Endangered Species Fair Trade Organic Chocolate Bars

Liberté Méditerranée Yogurt

SAVE

assorted varieties

SAVE

UP TO

Popcorn Indiana Popcorn assorted varieties 134-198g product of USA

SAVE

UP TO

29% 3.99 to 4.49

Eden Organic Pumpkin Seeds, Wild Berry Mix, Pistachios and Dried Tart Cherries assorted varieties assorted sizes • product of USA

3.49 to 12.99

30%

Anita’s Organic Breakfast Boost and Instant Oats

Organic Meadow Light Cream Cheese or Light Sour Cream assorted varieties 250 – 500g product of Canada

SAVE

33%

4.99 to 5.99

assorted sizes product of Philippines/Mexico

4.99 to 30% 10.99 UP TO

Calbee Snapea Crisps and Lentil Snaps assorted varieties 95g

SAVE

product of USA

41%

1.99

Rocky Mountain Flatbread Artisan Pizza assorted varieties

SAVE

34%

5.99 to 8.49

L’Ancetre Organic Cheese

Select Varieties and Sizes Excludes Bonus Sizes

20% off Regular Retail Price

414ml • +deposit +eco fee product of USA

36%

3/9.99

SAVE

assorted varieties

SAVE

25%

Genuine Health Fermented Protein Bars

44.99

2/5.00 55g Bar 29.99 12 pack

1.99/100g

assorted varieties 284g product of Canada

8.99

GLUTEN FREE Blueberry Muffins package of 4

Kettle Brand Potato Chips

5.99

assorted varieties 200 - 220g

SAVE

product of USA

38%

2/4.98

Pro Bar Food Bars

xxx BAKERY

xxx • product of xxx

assorted varieties

70-85g • product of USA

SAVE

28% 5.99

600g Powder

Choices’ Own Quinoa Salad, Moroccan Chickpea Salad or Roasted Tomato Chickpea Salad

1.89L • product of USA

Kicking Horse Organic Fair Trade Ground Coffee

UP TO

Genuine Health Fermented Vegan Proteins +

8.99 each

24% 3.49

200g product of Canada

SAVE

Rossdown Fraser Valley Free Run Roasted Chickens

Blue Diamond Almond Breeze Fresh Almond Beverages

assorted varieties

WELLNESS Natural Factors Supplements

assorted varieties

SAVE

370-430g • product of BC

4.49 to 6.29

34%

While quantities last. Not all items available at all stores. We reserve the right to correct printing errors.

assorted varieties

397 - 454g • product of BC

UP TO

product of Canada

Coco Natura Coconut Products

SAVE

Brew Dr. 100% Raw Organic Kombucha

500-750g

4.29

assorted varieties

SAVE

assorted varieties

38% 2.99 to

85g • product of USA

33% 3/9.99

UP TO

9.99lb/ 22.02kg

value pack

GROCERY

SAVE

Ovation Bone-In Lamb Shanks

Imported Grass Fed Free Range Rib Eye Steaks

2.98lb/ 6.57kg

.98lb/ 2.16kg

19.99lb/ 44.07kg

9.99lb/ 22.02kg

Red, Yellow and Orange Hot House Peppers from B.C.

Organic Celery from California

First of the Season Fresh Halibut Steaks

29%

packge of 12

3.19 to 3.49

4.99

NUTRITION TOUR

Look to Choices’ Nutrition Team Whatever your health goal, Choices team of Dietitians and Holistic Nutritionists can make it happen. • Find solutions for specialized diets. • Get ideas for fast and simple home cooked meals.

Ecoideas Organic Chia

White or Black

7.99 227g 12.99 454g

Alaffia Body Care Products Conditioner, Body Wash or Lotion Assorted Varieties

9.99

950ml

www.choicesmarkets.com

• Learn how to incorporate more fruits and vegetables into your everyday meals. To get started on your journey towards healthy living, book a FREE one-on-one consult or simply ask members of our Nutrition Team questions while you shop. To find out more about how we can help you, ask Customer Service, email nutrition@choicesmarkets.com or visit us online at choicesmarkets.com.

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