Vol. 17, Issue (Oct. 26, 2016)

Wolves volleyball secures two wins in two games

WESTERN OREGON UNIVERSITY | WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 26, 2016 VOLUME 17 ISSUE 5

page 5

INSIDE THIS ISSUE...

Food pantry serves hungry students Page 3

Feel the breeze: Fundie Run 2016 Page 7

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

Bob Dylan awarded Nobel Prize Page 9

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The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

THE WESTERN JOURNAL

345 N. Monmouth Ave. Monmouth, OR 97361 Student Media Department TERRY HOUSE NEWSROOM 503-838-8347

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF STEPHANIE BLAIR

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MANAGING EDITOR ZOË STRICKLAND

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NEWS EDITOR JADE RAYNER

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CAMPUS LIFE EDITOR PAIGE SCOFIELD

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ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR ASHTON NEWTON journalentertainment@wou.edu

SPORTS EDITOR BURKE DE BOER

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PHOTO EDITOR KEITH MATHEW

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DESIGNERS DARIEN CAMPO ELISSA SORENSON

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COPY EDITOR KRISTIN ECK

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ADVERTISING MANAGER BRIAN TESCH journaladvertising@wou.edu

WEB MANAGER GEANELL BERNARDO

Marijuana violations getting higher on Western’s campus Western’s campus conduct following the year after Measure 91 passed

By Jade Rayner | News Editor There has been a lot of excitement following the approval of Measure 91 that legalized the use of marijuana recreationally for those 21 and over in Oregon beginning July 1, 2015. Although it’s now legal in the state of Oregon, the use of marijuana in any form is strictly prohibited on Western’s campus in accordance with the DrugFree Schools and Communities Act. This restriction includes the use of medical marijuana. In order for Western Oregon University and its students to receive federal financial aid, including loans and grants it must comply with federal laws which deem marijuana illegal.

Has the legalization of marijuana in Oregon had any effect on Western’s campus? “Yes, I believe the number of violations are up due to the fact that people believe that it is legal here at WOU, when in fact it is not,” answered Rebecca Chiles, director of Campus Public Safety.

STUDENT MEDIA ADVISER RHYS FINCH finchr@wou.edu 503-838-9697

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According to reports from Campus Public Safety, there have been 27 marijuana violations recorded in the first four weeks of classes. The majority of violations took place in the residence halls, specifically Heritage, Landers and Ackerman. There has also been reoccurring activity in the parking lots, specifically Lot J. Public Safety takes violations of campus rules seriously.

When called about a potential violation, “a Public Safety officer will respond and get some information from the individuals. The officer will then either dispose of the marijuana if the person is under 21, or make the person take it off campus if they are 21 and older,” reports Chiles. In addition, students caught with the substance will be referred to the Office of Student Conduct and an employee will be referred to Human Resources.

This past year has brought on a lot of

change with the new laws regarding the use of marijuana in Oregon. Using it publicly is against the law; if you can be seen smoking outside of your private residence, you are in public and should not be using marijuana. You must be at least 21 to be smoking recreationally. On-campus violations haven’t been made strictly by those who are of age, Chiles added, “We are seeing the under 21 age group using marijuana which is illegal everywhere in Oregon.”

When questioning the details of Western Oregon University’s rules about the use of marijuana medically or recreationally, Campus Public Safety stated that, “the only rule that students need to know is that marijuana is not allowed on-campus in any form, at any time, by any person.”

Contact the author at journalnews@wou. edu

Campus Blotter: Marijuana Violations

journalweb@wou.edu

DISTRIBUTION MANAGER SAMANTHA DUNAWAY

NEWS

1. Heritage Hall 1. 9/29 2. 10/5 3. 10/7 4. 10/13 5. 10/13 6. 10/16 7. 10/16 8. 10/17

23:58 23:15 22:38 23:13 23:30 20:36 22:40 21:33

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4 3

1

4. Landers Hall 1. 9/30 22:30 2. 10/8 1:55

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2. Ackerman Hall

5. Lot J 6

1. 9/29 20:34 2. 9/30 22:24

1. 10/2 19:21 2. 10/9 0:42

6. Todd Hall 1. 10/12 21:02

3. Barnum Hall 1. 10/19 20:28 2. 10/19 22:13

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

NEWS

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

College students are hungrier than you think

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Campus food pantry helps counteract food insecurity

By Sadie Verville | Freelancer

if they’ll have enough food for the week to a skipped breakfast or lack of access to nutritious food.

The Western food pantry works hard to maintain consistent hours

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The Western food pantry works hard to maintain consistent hours for students

A recent report put out by the National Student Campaign Against Hunger and Homelessness, Student Government Resource Center, Student Public Interest Research Groups, College and University Food Bank Alliance and Hunger on Campus, revealed that as many as 48 percent of college students admitted to having food insecurity.

At Western, a study done in 2014

showed this number to be as high as 59 percent. In response to this, the Western food pantry has been hard at work to help students with these insecurities. More students than ever have been accessing the pantry.

“We’re grateful that people are coming in and accessing the food here,” said Rebecca Hardgrave, director of the food pantry. “But it also means that there are more

Western promotes diversity Where to find resources for Western’s students

By TK Layman | Freelancer Western Oregon University has been making several advances in promoting ethnic, religious and cultural diversity among its students.

The university has taken steps to allow students from all backgrounds to feel welcome during their time attending Western.

The 2015 statistics from the Associate Provost of the university, Dave McDonald, show that out of 4,808 undergraduate students within the university, 33.8 percent were non-white students. Relatedly, among returning admissions from 2014 to 2015, the university

reported their re-enrollment rates averaging 66.7 percent from nonwhite students.

Making resources available to the students is a mission that the university takes seriously. They do this by offering several clubs, organizations and services to students of different backgrounds.

The Multicultural Student Union is an organization run by the Multicultural Student Services Program, that offers many different events around campus to promote diversity and the education of our students across campus. Meeting

people who are food-insecure than we really know.”

Food insecurity is defined by the USDA Economic Research Service as a situation where, “the food intake of household members is reduced and their normal eating patterns are disrupted because the household lacks money and other resources for food”. This could be anything from a student wondering Wednesday nights at 6:00 p.m. in the Werner University Center Columbia Room, students can attend meetings to learn about upcoming events and learn about cultural awareness within our community.

Diversity awareness often times include awareness of different sexual orientations and gender identities. Western offers resources for students within the LGBTQ spectrum in the school’s Stonewall Center. The Stonewall Center coordinates trainings, such as ally and safe space training, for anyone looking to volunteer within the center and learn more about the LGBTQ community. Along with the Stonewall Center is the club, Triangle Alliance, who run many different events on campus and meet with students on Wednesday Nights at 4:00 p.m. in the Health & Wellness Center in room 301 to talk about resources for students

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

Continued on page 12 and events that may be happening around campus.

Of the resources available to students, many of them have student volunteers and advocates who can also help direct someone to the correct area for which they are following. A large step has been made for student diversity and inclusion, and with the help of online organizations it can make a large difference to everyone attending.

Contact the author at tlayman16@ wou.edu

Photo courtesy of WOU.EDU

Photo by MADISON HOCKER

for students to have access to resources. Right now, they try to keep a weekday eight to five schedule, but they would like to open up their hours during nights and weekends as well. In order to do this, however, they will need more volunteers.

“We always need people who are willing to donate their time,” said Hardgrave. More volunteers would also allow for a Campus Kitchen, a place where food from dining services could be re-served to students in need.

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The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

A tale of two halves

SPORTS

Photo by KEITH MATHEW

Football falls in hardfought homecoming battle The Wolves football team fell in their homecoming game on Oct. 22 against Humboldt State, 37-42.

Most of these points were scored in an explosive second half.

Quarterback Phillip Fenumiai threw the 68-yard opening score to wideout Paul Revis. The Wolves then tried to carry that momentum into a two-point conversion to open with an eight point lead. This was stopped and after Humboldt scored in the second quarter they took the lead, 6-7.

The teams felt one another out in a defensive slugfest. Western had the advantage going into the half after Revis blocked a Humboldt punt to set the team up for a 27-yard Jacob

Bannister field goal.

The 9-7 first half gave no indication to how high scoring the second half would become.

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The 9-7 first half gave no indication to how high scoring the second half would become

The third quarter saw Fenumiai break out on a 73 yard touchdown run, but was ultimately dominated by

The GNAC cross country championships were held in Bellingham, Washington on Oct. 22. The Western Oregon men’s team finished with enough points to place fourth and the women’s team placed ninth. The 8k men’s course saw David Ribich finish fifth place while Kennedy Rufener was the first Wolf to complete the 6k women’s course, coming in 17th place.

Depth helped the Wolves teams score their finishing positions, as

By Burke De Boer | Sports Editor Ribich was later followed across the finish line by tenth-place Dustin Nading. Justin Crosswhite came in

Cross country championships Ribich, Rufener lead pack among Wolves

Photo by MADISON HOCKER

By Burke De Boer| Sports Editor Humboldt State. The Lumberjacks put up 5 touchdowns in 15 minutes to surge to a 16-42 lead. Turnovers and effective plays kept the ball in Humboldt’s control and kept them visiting the endzone.

Despite the long odds, the Wolves were not yet out and mounted a fourth quarter comeback.

Fenumiai completed 11 of his 22 total completions in the fourth as Western fought to pick up three touchdowns. Trailing 37-42 the team onside kicked but couldn’t get a hold of the ball as the comeback The Wolves fall to 3-5 on the season with two games left to play.

Contact the author at journalsports@ wou.edu 25th, while Tyler Jones and Josh Dempsey came in 34th and 36th, respectively.

The points scorers for the women’s team included 20th place Grace Knapp, 36th place Suzanne Van De Grift, and Virginia Link and Amanda Dirzhazy finished within a second of one another to rank 72nd and 74th.

Ribich crossed the line with a time of 25:23. Rufener completed her race with a time of 22:41. This is the third meet of the season that Rufener finished pole position among Western runners, and her third in

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

a row. It is the fourth such meet for Ribich, who also won the John Frank and Ash Creek Invitationals.

The Wolves will go to Montana State Billings on Nov. 5 to compete for the NCAA Division II West Regional Championships.

Contact the author at journalsports@ wou.edu

SPORTS

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Volleyball’s perfect week

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By Burke De Boer | Sports Editor Wolves volleyball won both matches last week to advance to an 8-11 record overall. They beat St. Martin’s on Oct. 20 and Seattle Pacific on Oct. 22.

Both matches were played to four sets that included powerful showings by the Western players.

Against St. Martin’s, outside hitter Mariella Vandenkooy hit for .320, leading her to a career-best 16 kills. Alisha Bettinson continued her impressive ways, where she produced 11 kills and got her season-best 22 digs en route to her tenth double-double on the year.

The fourth match saw St. Martin’s

leap out to a 1-5 lead early, but the Wolves rallied and went on to rout their opponents and sealed the fourth and final set at 25-17. This

from a variety of players,” said Bettinson. “I think that’s what is going to help us continue to have success. Also having played every

team the second time round.”

Wolves continued their winning ways to Saturday.

The first two sets saw Western clobber Seattle Pacific with scores of 25-19 and 25-18. Bettinson notched yet another double-double onto her belt, racking up 15 kills and 12 digs while also nailing 2 blocks.

The Wolves look to take this winning streak onto the road. They travel to Washington on Thursday to face national #19 Western Washington, and then visit Canada for a match against Simon Fraser on Saturday.

Photo by AMBER HOLLAND Contact the author at journalsports@ included a dominant 12-2 run.

“We’ve been having a lot of success

team once already we have a better idea of what to expect from each

wou.edu

The resurrection of Tim Tebow Ex-NFL quarterback now pursues a baseball career

By Burke De Boer | Sports Editor

Photo courtesy of LATIMES.COM Tim Tebow is a hero. After 11 years without playing baseball, he signed a contract with the New York Mets and went to their minor leagues.

He hit a homerun off the first pitch of his first at bat. When a fan had a seizure he prayed over the man until paramedics arrived.

Tim Tebow is a joke. The Mets joined the publicity circus and gave him a contract despite the fact that he hadn’t played in 11 years. After joining the Scottsdale Scorpions in the Arizona Fall League, it took 15 at bats before

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a southpaw like Tebow. There are no left-handed quarterbacks in the NFL today. Being left-handed in football has no particular advantage, but in baseball the difference is significant. A lefty hitter gets Tebow has been a divisive a clean view of a righty’s pitch and a clean run at first base. player since his college When Pro Baseball Insider football days, and his recent crunched the numbers, they found left handed hitters pull foray into minor league a batting average of .270, seven baseball is no exception above the average for right handed hitters of .263.

Despite these advantages, Tebow’s baseball is no exception. not having a great time in Scottsdale.

Baseball should be a better fit for he finally got a hit.

Tebow has been a divisive player since his college football days, and his recent foray into minor league

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

He’s hitting 2-for-20 on the season.

The man is no Bo Jackson. He might adjust and make good for the Mets. But seeing as he started this new career only in September, it’s too soon to tell. He needs to adjust fast though, before the Mets start seeing his spot in the organization the way the Patriots and Eagles came to see his spot on their practice squads: expendable.

Contact the author at journalsports@ wou.edu

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CAMPUS LIFE

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Signing with passion favorite sign was. When asked this question, she looked puzzled and then signed “butterfly.”

This event was inclusive and

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It helps emphasize that ASL is like any other language

informational, especially when the panelists received questions which involved their opinion on signing in exact English. Strahan was very enthused to receive such

a question; she said she was, “Very against it. Primarily because it’s not the true native language of the deaf community.” Her answer helps emphasize that ASL is like any other language; it involves variation in meaning and grammar and never translates perfectly.

You can learn more about ASL club and their meeting schedule, by reaching out to them on Facebook and Instagram at WOU ASL club.

You can also find out about more deaf community events around Oregon on www.OAD1921.org.

Contact the author at spickrell15@ mail.wou.edu

Photo by AMBER HOLLAND

ASL Club Question and Answer

By Shaylie Pickrell | Freelancer On Oct. 20 the ASL club had a meeting with a guest speaker that included a question and answer panel. Western’s ASL club is very welcoming to anyone who is wanting to get more involved in the deaf community, become better at signing or anyone who just wants to hangout. During this meeting, elections were held for the officer positions in the club, as well as a small information session from all the people running.

The second half of the meeting was the question and answer panel. The

panel included Mika Woodward, ASL President Holly Wright and Hanna Strahan, a guest from Oregon State University. The questions included everything from favorite pets, to what it was like growing up deaf, to when they learned ASL. When responding to the questions, the members of the panel would first sign and then speak, allowing people who are newer at signing to compare what they already know and what they need to practice.

Some of the questions were harder to answer, such as what Strahan’s

Photo by AMBER HOLLAND

Western’s homecoming spirit burns on Western has its annual homecoming bonfire

By Shaylie Pickrell | Freelancer

The annual homecoming bonfire refused to go down without a fight.

Despite the rain at the beginning of the week and the event being postponed to Oct. 20, the weather cleared up just in time. The bonfire had a soggy start and it took a few attempts to get things running, but as the flames grew, so did the crowd surrounding it. There was live music provided by Western’s pep band as well as a visit from Wolfie, our beloved mascot. The

field near the Campus Public Safety office was filled with laughter and excitement, as a pie eating contest went underway causing everyone to come together. Wolfie even busted out a few popular dance moves. You could definitely feel the Western community spirit.

Contact the author at spickrell15@ wou.edu

Photo by MADISON HOCKER WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

CAMPUS LIFE

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Art, music, theater and dance Cocktail Corner

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A bite of a poisoned apple

By Paige Scofield | Campus Life Editor This week for our Halloween cocktail, we have a poison apple punch. This cocktail, although served cold, leaves you with a warm feeling (and it’s not from the alcohol). The use of spiced apple juice leaves you with the taste of autumn in your mouth. This is the perfect drink for fall. The recipe is as follows: Servings: 4

Photo by ALYSSA HENDRICKS

High school sudents come to Creative Arts Day

By Jasmine Morrow | Freelancer On Oct. 21 an amazing event happened on campus: creative arts day. Creative arts day is a great way for high school students to get involved in the art, theater, music and dance programs offered at Western. It also helps the students get to know more about the college itself and see if Western is the school for them.

The day was full of tours around campus, a great lunch at Valsetz and being able to see the fantastic options offered here at Western.

This is a brilliant opportunity for

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high school students because, “it’s really helpful for the students to see the campus, and get a familiarity and see how it feels to be on the campus, b e c a u s e that’s really influential on deciding where you go to college,” said Sydney C u l p e p p e r, a Western ambassador who gives tours of the campus and helps people get from session to session. “It’s also really nice to see the different opportunities because a lot of students don’t know the things

Creative arts day is a great opportunity for high schoolers to learn more about Western

Where did all your clothes go?

On Oct. 20, the fifth annual homecoming Fundie Run took place on Western’s campus. Though there weren’t many runners, it was still a success, given that the event got postponed to later in the week. The Fundie Run is a homecoming event that asks each contestant to donate at least two articles of clothing in order for them to enter a running race around Western’s campus.

The race is a mile long run that the participants compete in while

By Jasmine Morrow | Freelancer wearing only underwear, or running clothes if they prefer. The race then

Western’s fifth annual homecoming fundie run

that they can do when they come to college.”

Already being familiar with the campus before getting to college is incredibly helpful. This is one of the many things Western has to offer and since a lot of high school students aren’t aware of what a college can provide, this makes sure that they are informed of the opportunities presented. The possibilities here at Western are close to endless and spending the day here shows how impressive Western Oregon is.

Contact the author at jmorrow16@ mail.wou.edu

What you need: 2 parts spiced apple juice 1 part ginger beer 0.5 part raspberry syrup Making spiced apple juice: Bring apple juice to a boil along with some cinnamon and whole cloves.

How much cinnamon and cloves?

Start with 3 cinnamon sticks and about a teaspoon of whole cloves per half gallon (64 oz) of apple juice. Feel free to adjust. If it’s too spicy, just dilute it with more apple juice.

Once the juice has reached a boil, cover it and remove from heat until cooled.

Directions: Add all ingredients to a punch bowl and stir.

Recipe courtesy of www.12bottlebar. com Contact the author at journalcampuslife@wou.edu

ends at the bonfire location; the person who wins the race then lights the bonfire. The event raised a full barrel worth of clothes that will be donated to the Union Gospel Mission, located in Salem.

Contact the author at jmorrow16@ mail.wou.edu

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

Photo by PAIGE SCOFIELD

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ENTERTAINMENT

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

It’s morphin’ time

New Power Rangers film is set to hit theaters next year

By Alyssa James | Freelancer threat comes into their lives they realize that they are the only ones who can help. They have to learn to control their powers in order to save the world. It is set to premiere in theaters on March 24, 2017. If you grew up watching “Power Rangers” this is definitely a movie you won’t want to miss.

Not only is there a new movie coming out but there is the possibility of a new Power Rangers TV show focusing on the Green Ranger. Since the Green Ranger appears to be absent from the movie it seems more

like there is an actual possibility of this series than not. In an interview with comicbook.com, the actor of the original Green Ranger, Jason David Frank, says that there is a good chance that this spin-off will happen and that there has already been talks with creator Haim Saban about it.

While the Green Ranger show is not confirmed, there’s still plenty of Power Rangers content on its way next year.

Photo Courtesy of IMDB.COM

The throwback of all throwbacks is coming your way. A new Power Rangers movie is coming out within the next year. The original “Power Rangers” premiered in 1993 and has been around ever since then. It will be a whole new ball game when it comes to the new movie, directed by Dean Israelite. This new adaptation of “Power Rangers” will be starring Naomi Scott, Becky G., Elizabeth Banks, Bryan Cranston and more.

The movie will follow a group of high school students who each have unique superpowers. When an alien

Contact the author at ajames16@ wou.edu

Review: “Rise of the Tomb Raider: 20 Year Celebration Edition”

“Tomb Raider” shines with new features

By Blayde Biacan | Freelancer The original tomb raider turned 20 years old last week, and since then has gained a huge fan following. With the 20th anniversary, “Rise of the Tomb Raider: 20 Year Celebration” was released on Oct.11. The new edition includes many new features, such as virtual reality and multiplayer.

The game also has a new downloadable expansion called “Blood Ties”.

This addition to the story explains Lara Croft’s family bonds and doesn’t add many new details to the story, but rather, enforces some content that was lightly mentioned throughout the plot of the game. The playthrough

of this is more story-based so there isn’t much action, but there is a lot of time to connect the dots. This is also playable for anyone with a virtual reality device through free hand control or a moveclick system as a form of move me nt .

How e v e r, it looks s m o o t h e n o u g h without the system and can cause m o t i o n sickness.

Another feature of the game which is unlockable after completing the Blood Ties story is a similar playthrough except with the addition of zombies and a more eerie environment to play in. When

This is a game that has lasted 20 years in an ever-changing gaming community.

playing, it’s difficult to really know the direction from where a zombie might appear. The dark environment is no help to this, as it has a small field of view with mixed audio signals in a cramped space with multiple pathways for zombies to approach.

I like the new multiplayer mode, although it’s not competitive. It has a survival component with another player and both players need to rely on each other for food and supplies as well as exploring booby trapped maps that are randomly generated

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

each playthrough.

I would recommend this game to anyone that has played the previous “Rise of the Tomb Raider” and who wants to experience something new with an additional challenge and highly recommend it for people that have not. This is a game that has lasted 20 years in an ever-changing gaming community. Truly a game that deserves the title “old but gold”.

Contact the author at bbiacan16@ wou.edu

Photo Courtesy of TOMBRAIDER.COM

ENTERTAINMENT

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Bob Dylan awarded Nobel Prize in literature

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The award is won, but Dylan has yet to accept

By Kinsey Bushart | Freelancer This year Bob Dylan became the first American to win a Nobel Prize since novelist Toni Morrison back in 1993. Dylan is also the first ever songwriter to be awarded the Nobel Prize in literature in the 112 years since the award was created, and the newest p e r s o n awarded with the honor of being the most inspirational and developed lite rar y creators.

Bob Dylan began his singing, songwriting, writing and art career in 1959 at the age of 18. In the 75-yearold’s long career, he has gathered

the admiration of millions of people around the world with his poetic and inspirational lyrics, especially in the 1960s when some of his most i n f l u e nt i a l as well as controversial songs were released. At that time he was c ons i d e re d an unofficial sp oke s man on the issues in America and he also addressed said issues in his lyrics and movements.

Dylan was touring while the broadcast of his Nobel Prize was announced but since the Nobel Committee decided to award the Nobel Prize in literature to Bob

Dylan is also the first ever songwriter to be awarded the Nobel Prize in literature in the 112 years since the award was created.

Photo Courtesy of CNN.COM Dylan, they have not been able to contact the artist except through his manager. Since they have yet to

Contact the author at kbushart16@ wou.edu

Photo Courtesy of CNN.COM

Editor’s Picks

By Ashton Newton | Entertainment Editor

Editor’s Recommendations:

“Westworld” is currently halfway through its first season on HBO and it’s fantastic. The premise is that there’s a park populated by android hosts, where guests can pay to do whatever they want, such as hunt for treasure and go on adventures, but the androids start acting up and everything gets crazy from there. The park is wild-west themed so the show has an awesome balance between western and science fiction action.

Also, in the western genre, “Red Dead Redemption 2” was just announced for a fall

2017 release. The first “Red Dead”, made by Rockstar Games, holds up as one of the most immersive western games of all time. I recommend checking it out.

Editor’s Disparagement:

PlayStation Now is an amazing concept. PlayStation Now has a massive library of streamable games that you can pick and play on the PlayStation 4 without any download at all. Sounds great, but in reality PlayStation Now makes playing those games

receive a confirmation of acceptance from Dylan, the committee has given up attempting to award the icon this prestigious honor. The ceremony will go on as planned, even if Dylan is not there to accept it.

Photo Courtesy of HBO.COM extremely not enjoyable. Unless you have the world’s best Internet connection, the stream is constantly interrupted and slow.

The monthly subscription is also way too high; $20 a month might be good if the service worked.

Overall, PlayStation Now is an awesome concept that is terribly executed.

Contact the author at journalentertainment@wou.edu

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

10

HUMOR

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

It’s the great drunk review

“It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” drunk review

By Paige Scofield | Part-Time Human Disaster Note: this article was edited for readability.

So this is going to be less of a review and more of an I watch-I think-I type kind of situation. This is indeed a drunk review of the classic: “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown”.

Honestly I don’t know what to expect so strap in because I bet my bottomdollar that half of this isn’t even going to be about Charlie.

I’m currently finishing a 16oz Rolling Rock beer. Before said beer I drank almost a whole bottle of champagne so I can’t feel my lips and my legs feel like noodles. I didn’t think that almost a whole bottle of

champagne would do this but holy cow I’m gone. I’m trying so hard to type good. But typing is definitely a sober activity (sport?). I have so many bubbles in my stomach.

Okay I’m going to down this beer and start the show! I really just want to sleep but I gotta work dude. Okay let’s watch this thing. Okay starting with the classic music-Linus just ate an apple off the ground what the f***.

That’s dirty. Now Lucy and Linus are picking a pumpkin to carve.

Lucy is rude to Linus. Lucy just cut a pumpkin to carve it and Linus thought she killed a vegetable. Go Charles Shultz. Snoopy is playing with a leaf. I love Snoopy. But his

cousin Spike is super cool. My mom really likes Spike; Spike isn’t in this but whatever. Charlie is about to get duped with a football. Why does he always trust Lucy to hold a football?

And he kicked and fell once again.

Lucy, just be nice?

Linus is writing to the Great Pumpkin. Snoopy looks on and laughs. Lucy is being a douche as usual-telling Linus his Great Pumpkin is fake. Linus realizes to never talk about politics, religion and the Great Pumpkin to other people.

Sally loves Linus even though he still carries a blanket around. How old are these kids? Also, why does he think the Great Pumpkin is a

Photo Courtesy of IMDB.COM

This week in completely made up horrorscopes Compiled by Zoë Strickland and Ashton Newton Aries 3/21-4/19 I don’t know how many times you’ve been warned, Aries. Your death will be your own fault; wandering in the woods is never a good idea, especially when it’s clown season.

Libra 9/23-10/22 Watch your head when you walk by Heritage, Libra. An angry first year will propel a toilet out of the window and in your direction.

Taurus 4/20-5/20 Four words: angry trick-or-treaters. This faux-psychic recommends that you give out the good candy.

Scorpio 10/23-11/21 Your death, Scorpio, is going to be reminiscent of that scene from “The Mummy”. You know, the one with all of the scarabs crawling under your skin.

Gemini 5/21-6/20 The ghost of the twin that you ate in the womb is coming for you, Gemini.

Sagittarius 11/22-12/21 Pay my tuition! As you may have guessed, I’m being told that your death is going to be an average one. You, dear Sagittarius, will get hit by a car while rushing to class.

Cancer 6/21-7/22

Capricorn 12/22-1/19 The signals are coming in a little fuzzy, and all signs point to you already being dead. My medium always told me that the first zombies would come in the form of Capricorns.

Leo 7/23-8/22 This is kind of awkward, but the stars are telling me that you’re going to choke on some Frosted Flakes.

I guess they won’t be all that grrreat anymore.

Virgo 8/23-9/22 Well, Virgo, your death is just sad. On Sunday morning you’re going to roll out of your bed and straight into your death. Mercury may not be in retrograde, but your mattress is definitely too high.

Aquarius 1/20-2/18 Watch your feet, Aquarius, and be careful when you go to Red Lobster.

Pisces 2/19-3/20 Sorry, Pisces. You chose ‘trick’ in this game of chance called life, and you’re hereby going to live forever.

WOU.EDU/WESTERNJOURNAL

EDITORIAL

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

CAMPUS VOICES

By Ashton Newton | Entertainment Editor

What is your opinion on third party voting?

“It matters, but I don’t really know how much it matters in the grand scheme of things.”

Jacen Miller, Sophomore, Criminal Justice

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“I’m still trying to figure out my feelings on third party voting, but I’m kind of leaning towards the fact that it would take away votes from stopping someone that I don’t want in office .”

Robin Perkins, junior, business/ Spanish

“I don’t think enough people take advantage of that opportunity.”

Nash Idler, Sophomore, Psychology

“I don’t vote because I don’t like America, straight up.”

Keola Pedrina, Sophomore, Business

Photos by JOSHUA DAVIS

Don’t dismiss third parties

Libertarians and Greens can build their base for the future

By Burke De Boer | Sports Editor If you’re like me, one of our two 2016 candidates has offered policies that resonate and you’ve got a horse in the race that is the presidential election. Chances are you’re not like me.

According to Fivethirtyeight, Clinton and Trump are our least popular candidates ever. Yet many argue that if you don’t vote for their candidate you’re wasting your vote outright. This is, after all, an astonishingly important election.

We’re told Trump with nuclear codes will lead to the end of the world, while Clinton’s aggressive stances from Honduras to Russia will lead to World War III, and possibly also the end of the world.

Trevor Noah warns that Trump will go full-dictator and says, “This could

be the very last vote you ever get.”

Meanwhile, Ann Coulter predicts a Clinton presidency so disastrous that this election will “determine the survival of western civilization.”

Gosh.

Despisers of Duverger’s law have a way out. All they have to do is waste their vote.

When Gary Johnson ran in 2012, it was the first year that a Libertarian candidate cracked a million votes.

He’s definitely getting at least five percent of the popular vote this year.

And that’s what it all comes down to.

The third party vote is not actually about electing Gary Johnson or Jill Stein in 2016.

Five percent in one election opens Federal Election Commission

moneybags the following cycle, entitling a third party to around 10 million dollars of general election financing. For perspective, OpenSecrets.org calculates that the Green Party has raised $3 million this cycle while the Libertarians have pulled $11 million.

The two third parties nearly made it to the debates this year. A strong showing in the election and increased presence going into 2020 could actually get them there.

If a Libertarian or Green Party platform appeals to you, I encourage you to vote for their candidate. To lift a Trump quote, “What have you got to lose?”

The country isn’t going to fall apart just because you cast a ballot for

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Stein or Johnson in Oregon, a state that will go blue anyway. After all, this is not simply the election where a North Carolina Republican office was firebombed. It’s also the election where, according to Time Magazine, the Democrat Party raised $13,000 to help the Republicans with repairs. It’s an election for a country founded on a government of checks and balances.

If you don’t like your two options in 2016, a third party vote may ensure better options in 2020. At which point we will, again, reassess our country’s policies and direction and again determine our country’s next course.

Contact the author at bdeboer11@ wou.edu

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TAIL-END

The Western Journal Wednesday, October 26, 2016

It’s the great drunk review

Continued from page 10

halloween santa? That’s weird.

Sally and Linus have a “date” to wait for the Great Pumpkin but Charlie is like no. CHARLIE GOT INVITED TO A HALLOWEEN PARTY AND DANCES. OOPS, CAPS IS ON. Lucy is still being RUDE. Now they make costumes.

Charlie is bad at it. Everyone keeps hating on Linus but Sally approves of him. Also, no one says “tricks or treats” LUCY. It’s “TRICK OR TREAT”.

I feel like I’m writing a play-byplay so I’m going to wait a bit to write more. It’s only eight minutes in. Excuse me, nine minutes.

Someone finally said good grief.

Pig pen is dirty. Snoopy is a bomb pilot. He is so confident. I wish I could be as confident as Snoopy.

anymore. Charlie got a rock instead of candy? Snoopy! I finally understand why he called himself Snoop Dog-because Snoopy is so cool. Holy cow I’ve written a lot. Man, if only writing was this easy sober. Where’s Woodstock?

Here comes piano man. I don’t remember his name but he’s cool.

Snoopy cries weird. Linus thinks Snoopy is the Great Pumpkin.

He’s not. Someone finally said blockhead. Linus was out until four in the morning? Where are his parents?

The Great Pumpkin is fake.

12/10 recommend this for everyone to watch. If you want.

Please don’t contact the author.

Sally loves Linus a lot. Linus is being sexist thinking little girls believe everything they’re told. what the f--- Linus that’s not cool.

I don’t think I have neck bones

Food pantry

Continued from page 3

If you’re a student looking for ways to help, direct volunteering and help at fundraisers for the food pantry is one option. But even just small food donations in the drop locations, like the one in front of the food pantry, help.

“If you are looking for ways to give back or to serve your community, keep us in mind. We always need volunteers, and we

always appreciate any help we can get,” said Hardgrave.

If you are a student in need, the pantry is located in the Academic Programs and Support Center on the second floor. Don’t feel afraid to visit; you are not alone. Everything is completely confidential. Volunteers can also arrange to deliver food to students who are too busy or too hesitant to

go to the pantry. Hardgrave wants you to remember: “There’s nothing wrong with coming into the food pantry.”

Contact the author at sverville15@ wou.edu

Correction

In issue 4, The Western Journal miscredited the exhibit ‘Evolution of Wolfie” article. The exhibit was created by the Hamersly Library Archives, Student Engagement, Student Activities Board and the Office of Alumni.

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