Into the Wishing Well

Into the Wishing by Dimitra Colovas Well

She has always wished to be the girl she sees at the surface of a wishing well. Blue, but only by the reflection of a bright sky above. But when she tosses in her coin to wish her well, she breaks into many different faces, each a different version of herself, moving in and out of each other with the ripples of the toss. The image is broken; she knows she is not that girl.

She wishes her well, that cohesive image of a girl so put-together. When the peace is disturbed, she is able to see who the girl really is, composed of many variations of the same soul. Through the waves, she sees the facial features move. Illusions of different faces belonging to different people. In a way, they are all different people. She hasn’t always been the same—whole. She is now only cohesive when combining past versions of herself. Versions of herself she once wished to drown out. But now, she extends much deeper than the few inches of stagnant water in the well. The water is still, but her feelings are mixed. Washing over her like waves of the deepest emotions. Who is she really, if not the face she can see when looking back at herself? There is appreciation but not always love. There is resentment in who she sees once the surface tension breaks, but there is recognition for who these different people have allowed her to be. After all, they have all led her to stand in front of this mirror and reflect honestly. If nothing else, there is a friend there to console her and listen to her vulnerable thoughts.

She wishes her well. She wishes she would remain in one piece through the waves she will endure in the future. These desperate coin tosses are an integral part of her fate. Here she can wish on what will come in the future rather than wait to see it staring at her in the eyes as she does now. The still expression she holds becomes warped with each move of the water, confusing her smile with a frown, and they lose the confident eye contact previously held. The eyes hold many truths, like tidal pools of their own. Filled with pain that reveals a little more than she would originally wish to share, but the kind that fills a silence with comfort. Here, she can plan a future for the girl stuck at the bottom of the wishing well. She is in control when wishing for her peace. During these moments, she sees the pain reserved for this well only, existing underground, buried.

There is no room for regret at the edge of a wishing well: only a few inches’ difference means falling over the edge, slipping into the water so dark it can only be viewed as a mirror from where the light shines. A well shows her layers a mirror overlooks. The edge of a wishing well, where a possible future becomes a reality as the weight of a coin shatters the twodimensional display of a girl in her current state–misrepresentative of the experiences that have led her to this moment of hope. The edge of a wishing well is both the most dangerous and comforting place for her to reside. So, without fail, she always returns, taking the risk of leaning into her emotions so far she may lose her balance and tumble over. At least curiosity would be the force pushing her too far. There is no regret in self-discovery.

Wishing well, she wishes you well. You hold her on the surface and allow her to disturb her own peace as her past versions do to her current self. She wishes them well, all of the infinite spirals of waves around the coin’s splash. A disruption to see the truth. Blue, but only by the reflection of a bright sky above.

The ripples settle. The coin is resting on top of the past tosses at the bottom of the well. Together, the coins help to create a reality for which really only the girl above is responsible. She is left to see the still image once more. They smile at each other—harmony. They are just one once more. The other faces have combined to create one past, looking directly at the present. And they hold each other in solidarity for the future. The water rests like this. This calm state continues to exist until a coin transports her to the girl at the bottom of the wishing well again.