Spring 2011 Issue 8 Backpage - Jack Issue

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WE LIKE IT ON TOP (AND SOMETIMES ON THE BOTTOM)

MAR

31 2011

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SHITS AND GIGGLES

New Dot System Proposed

IN THIS ISSUE

Quiet Dot — You're a sophomore who decided to masturbate in the Allen Reading Room, just to be safe/you didn't have someone to hook up with. Friday Dot — Your biggest concern is whether you should be kickin' in the front seat or sittin' in the back seat. Which seat should you take? Either one, just don't take the seat next to the unnamed guy at least twice your age who starts rapping about school buses. Environmental Studies Dot — We all must have red dots because we're raping Mother Earth on a daily basis. got walked home b y your pal. Better luck next time.

by JOSH GOODMAN “Pio Ke$ha”

With the success of Green Dot at lowering sexual assault on campus, the Dean of Students Office is expanding the program to include more than Red Dots and Green Dots. Below is the proposed new dot system: Red Dot — Sexual actions without consent. Green Dot — Sexual actions

to

Blue Dot — Consent for sex in Lakum Duckum. Ducks included.

with consent or actions that prevent situations that may lead unwanted sexual contact.

Quaaaaack! Dot — Sexual advances by one duck that are unwanted by another duck.

Yellow Dot — Not sure if there was consent, so proceed with caution.

Charlie Sheen Dot — Itdoesn't matter what color dot you have because you're winning.

Black Dot — You blacked out after 14 shots and

Pi Dot — You're a math major spending Saturday night in the library thinking about how pi r squared equals the area of the Green Dot you got because you're spending Saturday night in the library. Post-Modern Dot — There is no such thing as a universal truth, and therefore no such thing as a sexual action, much less one that is worthy of a green or red dot, or any other colored dot.

Bon Appétit runs out of tofu, students freak by RACHEL ALEXANDER “Doesn’t want to be EIC”

S

tudents eating dinner in Prentiss Dining Hall last week were surprised to discover that tofu had completely disappeared from the menu. Tofu is a perennial favorite in the dining hall, praised by students for its robust texture and subtle yet delicious flavors. But according to Bon Appétit staff member Joe Vansel, the delectable protein has been a victim of its own success. “Bon Appétit has completely run out of tofu,” said Vansel, who is the company’s vice president in charge of vegetarian protein substitutes. “Student demand for it has been so high that we’ve used up our entire reserve tofu stockpile.” Vansel said that Bon Appétit has always experienced high demand for tofu, but that demand has risen exponentially in the past few years as more students have become vegetarian and vegan. “There’s an increasing awareness of the problems with industrial food production,” said Vansel. “Many students feel uncomfortable eating animal products of uncertain origin, so they naturally shift comfortably to an amorphous white food-like substance that they’re told contains protein.” For Whitman’s vegetarian community, the lack of tofu was cause for concern. “Bon Appétit needs to do more to provide for people who choose

not to eat animal products,” said junior Sarah Hemmer, president of Vegans Against Cruelty to Animals, Nutria and Terriers (VACANT). “They cater well to some students, but the options for vegans who are gluten intolerant, only eat raw, organic foods and can’t have added sugar in their diet are really limited.” Some Whitman students welcomed the lack of tofu. Firstyear Jack Dowling said that he looked forward to meals featuring something he called “real food.” “I have nothing against tofu, unless I have to eat it,” he said. He started to list foods Bon Appétit could replace the missing tofu with, but was attacked by a mob of VACANT members before he could finish saying “pork chops.” Vansel said that Bon Appétit is committed to finding acceptable replacements for vegetarian protein while the company assesses their tofu consumption and looks for suppliers who are capable of handling large volume orders. One of the options being considered is RPP, also known as reformulated polymer protein. “RPP is a great option for vegetarians, because it’s a truly sustainable product,” said Vansel. “It’s made from recycled plastics harvested from the Pacific Ocean, and it’s held together by a vegan protein substrate that binds the plastic together.” TOFU,

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Challah for Hunger finds competition in Mad Libs for Libya, Taffy to oust Gaddafi 2-­West has sober night, Lyman throws rager consisting of 10 students, 2 bottles of wine The Pio comes out with an issue that people actually read from front to back Student looks like douche bag after being quoted in weekly college newspaper New RA training involves self-­ alienation from all previously made relationships New music publication relishes its use of CTRL+C and CTRL+V IHC changes application to ensure potential resident is comfortable having computer stolen ASWC Rep. stays quiet for the first time, meeting ends 30 minutes early

PHOTO BY BERNSTEIN; ILLUSTRATION BY LERCHIN

Fun, education collide at Manatees to Campus Day by NICK WOOD

“Swims with the Manatees”

F

or the first time this year, over 150 manatees will make their way to campus as part of Whitman’s Manatee Program which pairs Whitman students with at-risk manatees. The program was started by Environmental-Biology student Trish Echida as part of her senior project. “Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve been in love with the doc-

2

The Pioneer transforms into Greek organization Pi Omega, investiages own questionable initiation practices. PAGE

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ile but majestic manatee. Now I really have the chance to give back and make a difference.” Echida designed the project as an outreach program for the at-risk mammals. “Most people know that manatees are an endangered species. They’ve heard about habitat degradation and speedboat collisions. What they don’t know is the vicious social cycle that results from these conditions and MANATEES,

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Students run out of streams to restore, riots erupt on Ankeny Seniors rate Heath Ledger’s death as one of top ten most influential events of college; Billy Mays close second. Financial aid awards scholarship to heir of billionaire

nO


MAR

2

31 2011

Pio editors suggest practical uses for the paper said paper is printed on

14.

7. 8. 9.

Cover windows during initiation

(Continued from left) The Pioneer’s Production staff regrets every Wednesday night. We apologize profusely to the professors of our Thursday morning classes.

by RACHEL ALEXANDER

Given the high number of offcampus houses with stripper poles, we regret that we don’t have one in our office.

News Editor

Use as kindling

We regret that the sophomore who boasted of masturbating in the Allen Reading Room didn’t cum forward sooner.

3

Number of sophomores who admit to masturbating in the quiet room this semester

Managing Editor Alyssa Fairbanks, Production Manager Maggie Appleton, and Production Associate Ted Hendershot regret monopolizing The Pioneer “Slut of the Week Award.” However, we do not regret sharing their stories at 2 a.m. on Thursday morning.

152

Line a bird cage

1. 2.

NUMBERS IN THE NEWS

Number of sophomores who have been observed masturbating in the quiet room by members of other classes

Line a hamster cage

News Editor Rachel Alexander regrets that Co-News Editor Josh Goodman knows all of the words to Ke$ha’s “We R Who We R.”

35.6%

Make a hat or a boat

Percentage of sophomore class this represents

Editor-in-Chief Molly Smith regrets the sing-a-long to “We R Who We R” in the office during the “Jack Issue Writing Party.” She does not regret the fact that she, along with five other staffers, spent a Friday night in the office writing jokes.

7:46

Line a litter box

pm

Peak usage time of the quiet room for autoerotic purposes

15.

Fill empty shelves in the Pio office

10.

Use as toilet paper

3.

1:14

Average time to achieve orgasm, in minutes and seconds

We regret the quality of these jokes.

0

Number of juniors who admit to masturbating in the quiet room this semester

Webmaster Rebecca Fish regrets the ad for our website in the February 17 issue which jokingly read “Please don’t hack us.” We were kind of serious. Please don’t.

0

We regret that our Circulation Assistants don’t wear safety vests while distributing the paper around campus.

Number of seniors who admit to masturbating in the quiet room this semester

Use as wallpaper

Senior Copy Editor Jenna Mukuno does not regret calling Opinion Editor Gary Wang, Wary Gang.

1

16.

Look at it to avoid having to interact with someone

11.

Use as a barrier between your arts-and-crafts projects and the table/floor

4.

Editors-in-Chief Molly Smith and Derek Thurber regret their lack of a social life as a result of working on The Pioneer.

1

Number of Jan Starts who, after further questioning, admitted they were lying and just trying to impress their friends in 2-West

A&E Editor CJ Wisler regrets asking Ted if he was in theater in high school when he was just, as he put it, “extremely homosexual.” She also regrets any awkwardness caused by comments made about her own marvelous breasts, including this one.

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Whitman’s rank on the Princeton Review’s list of “Liberal Yet Somehow Still Sexually Repressed College Campuses”

12.

Use as a book cover

Web Editor Ellie Gold regrets that Walla Walla is technically considered an “urban” area.

Number of Jan Starts who admit to masturbating in the quiet room this semester

Make found poetry

We do not regret taking shots out of our 2011 ACP “Best of Show” trophy. We won that shit, bitches. News Editor Rachel Alexander regrets that she can’t “crank it” better. However, her ability to “dougie” has improved significantly this semester.

NO, I HAVE NO REGRETS The year in mistakes, embarrassments, and misjudgments.

5. 6.

13.

Wrap a present

Clean mirrors

Use as stuffing (for packages, pillows, mattresses, stuffed animals, etc.)

In the September 16 issue of The Pioneer, the headline under the Letter from the Editor read “The Pio is awesome.” That shit’s just unprofessional. We regret the error. However, we do not regret being awesome.

17.

Impress peers with reading abilities

18.

ADVERTISEMENT

A PUBLIC SAFETY NOTICE

* * * * * QUIXFOOD * * 4242 St. Isaacs Street. * * * *Ice-Cold Bear, * *Cigareddes, Ho’s,* *and Warm Paninis!* *OPEN 9 a.m. - 4 a.m.* * * *Come and taste our * *hot smoked meats * * * * * * *

Dear members of the campus community, As you may be aware, a cougar was seen on campus early this morning. The Police and Fish and Game were on campus but were unable to locate the animal. We don’t know if the cougar is still on campus, but please be cautious. Should you see the cougar, please do not approach it. Immediately call the Police at 911 or Security at 527-5777. Thank you, Chuck Cleveland

We regret mistakenly printing the number of senators as 102 in the Front Page Info-graphic in the November 4 issue. With the number of politics majors on staff, that’s just embarrassing. Editors-in-Chief Molly Smith and Derek Thurber regret that The Pioneer’s staff training focused more on how to access and request government documents and less on how to actually write a fucking article. The Advertising staff regrets that they can no longer provide readers with the ever-so tasteful Red Monkey ads. We regret the blatant misspellings and the tacky pinstripes in the Food Mart ads. Even our writers know that curry is not spelled curray. The Pioneer Editors regret signing our stipend volunteer contracts. (Continues at right)

WHITMAN NEWS, DESPAIR!

NERDS

GEEKS

SCRIBES

SUITS

Alpha Bitches Molly “Schwastey in My Jeans” Smith & Derek “Backroom Lovin’” Thurber

Design Nerds Maggie “Keep Calm and Design!” Appleton

NEWS

Chief Suit Dhavan Vengadasalam

Goons Alyssa “Don’t Take Me Out For Sushi” Fairbanks

Ted “It’s 5 O’Clock Somewhere” Hendershot, Miriam “Snakes Don’t Unhinge Their Jaws [And Neither Do I]” Kolker, Abigail Sloan, Meg Vermilion

A&E

Empty Suits Leland Matthaeus, Kira Peterson, Junpei Tsuji Web Goon Rebecca Fish

Rachel “I Don’t Wanna Be EIC” Alexander & Josh “Ke-dollar sign-Ha” Goodman

Taneeka Hansen, Sean McNulty, McCaulay Singer-Milnes, Kate Robinette, Will Witwer

F7 Presser Jenna “Ja Rule” Mukuno

FEATURE

Lord and Master ASWC (The Associated Students of Whitman College)

Cara “Thing 1” Lowry & Patricia “Thing 2” Vanderbilt

CREEPERS

Libby “...” Arnosti & Nick “Swims With the Manatees” Wood Gary “Slutty McSlut Slut” Wang Diana “That’s Not Funny” Dulek Jack “Likes It In the Tit” Lazar Olivia “These Pictures Aren’t Pretty Enough” Johnson Ellie “Wordpress To Your Mother” Gold

Alyssa Goard, Will Gregg, Karah Kemmerley, Shelly Le, Joe Volpert

Hanna Kahl, Kelsey Kennedy, Maren Schiffer, Monica Simmons

Marin Axtell, Faith Bernstein, Julia Bowman, Brandon Fennell, Ben Lerchin, Kendra Klag, Ethan Parrish, Marie Von Hafften

SPORTS

MAD MEN

Andrew Hawkins, Tyler Hurlburt, Pamela London, Matt Manley

Ad Man Anna Taylor

OPINION

ART GOONS

Alex Brott, Lissa Erickson, Bryant Fong, Blair Frank, Tristan Grau, Staten Hudson, Ami Tian

Ad Suits Phuong Pham, Brian Vieth, Hailun Zhou

Sam Alden, Jea Alford, Molly Johanson, Binta Loos-Diallo, Carrie Sloane, Jung Song, Markel Uriu

BACKPAGE Adam Brayton, Cari Cortez

Ad Woman Brianna Jaro

We regret that you probably aren’t reading this.

Students mull soyicide pact from TOFU SHORTAGE,

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-er by a vegan protein substrate that binds the plastic together.” Hemmer said that RPP would probably be an adequate substitute for tofu, but that Bon Appétit needed to carefully consider its sourcing practices for the materials. “While I fully support plastic recycling and believe that RPP can be a sustainable food choice, we need to consider the carbon footprint caused by importing plastic from the Pacific Ocean,” she said. VACANT has plans to work with Bon Appétit to start a campus plastic recycling program which could ultimately provide enough plastic to meet Whitman’s RPP demands. According to Hemmer, this program would allow dining hall RPP to be certified as local, which could allow it to qualify as “real food” for an audit currently being conducted by campus environmental groups. When asked about the transition from tofu to RPP, Dowling thought for a minute and finally nodded. “Whatever RPP is, it can’t be any worse than field roast,” he said.

EDITORIAL POLICY The Whitman College Missionary is a weekly student-run newspaper published in the floating cloud cities fully owned and incorporated by the Associated Students of Whitman College. The purpose of The Missionary is to provide a newspaper for the Whitman alumni organization to send to former students. Our website, fully owned and incorporated by the Associated Students of Whitman College, is also useful to zombies and people who Google-search “hwo to get itno witman college.” The Missionary is dedicated to expanding open discussion on campus about the issues with which students are most concerned, but you probably don’t read this so you’re probably not talking about any of this, anyway. We cover Whitman-related news, and our opinion writers write stuff about the rest of the world. If we misquoted you, made you sound like an idiot, or you just don’t like the shit we write, you can submit a Letter to the Editor, who is fully owned and incorporated by the Associated Students of Whitman College.

SUBMISSION POLICY Letters to the Editor should be placed in the black plastic-lined inbox outside the Pioneer office in Reid. You can also submit letters at spam@ whitmanmissionary.com. Letters should be written in normal English; you can write colourful shit, but please don’t analyse with a z (that’s zed).

CODE OF ETHICS The code of ethics serves as The Missionary’s established guidelines for not pissing professors off, not getting sued, and keeping our reporters busy. There is only one rule: no fucking Oxford commas. Responsibility for amending the code of ethics is assigned to the Editor-in-Chief and Publisher, who are fully owned and incorporated by the Associated Students of Whitman College. The code of ethics is reviewed at least once per semester at our biannual methadone ice-chalet festivals. These festivals also have only one rule: tell none about the clubbings. To access the complete code of ethics for The Missionary, visit your local dentist.

For information about advertising to broke, beer-thirsty college students, contact BUSINESS@WHITMANMISSIONARY.COM


MAR

3

31 2011

Administration to provide viewing stations for Beer Mile by JOSH GOODMAN “Pio Ke$sha”

I

f you've ever found yourself curious about Beer Mile, but didn't want to run it, there's a new option in store. Last Thursday, Whitman College administrators announced the purchase of 10 ViewFinder viewing stations, common at zoos and natural attractions, for the annual pre-finals nudist event. Beer Mile viewing stations will be set up on the roofs of Maxey West, Jewett Hall and Penrose Library. The viewing stations, which cost 2,500 dollars apiece, are being paid for by the Student Affairs Office and ASWC's Student Travel and Development Fund. Beer Mile, for first-years and those ignorant people who don't know what it is, involves drunken laps around Ankeny Field at midnight on the Tuesday before finals, hours after the last classes finish. "This is a Whitman tradition," said Dean of Student Affairs Alan Kohal. "But we recognize that some people are selfconscious about their body, curious about other bodies, or just want to enjoy the experience fully clothed and sober." Some students felt that the rooftop viewing experience would provide a nice contrast to their experience running Beer Mile. "I ran it last year and it was pretty awesome, but I sort of want to see what it looks like as a spectator," said sophomore Jeremy Jones. First-year Richard Burns was a little more honest. "I want to see lots of boobies," he said. Not everyone will use the viewing stations, though. Sophomore Mike Hancock said that he planned to watch from inside the library. "I don't know why the school needs to spend so much money on this when they're raising tuition and class sizes," he said. "I plan to watch from the Allen Reading Room in the library, and I have my own pair of 40-dollar binoculars. This is such a waste." ASWC, which is paying 15,000 of the total 25,000-dollar cost, justified the expense by saying that it was responding to student requests. "Students have been asking for this for years," said ASWC

Vice President Percy Vertz. "It was either this or send some kids to Glenn Beck's Rally to Maintain Insanity, and this serves the whole Whitman community." Not everyone thinks it is appropriate to view Beer Mile, though. Senior Anita Manshire, president of Feminists Empowering, Changing and Leading (FECAL), said that the viewing stations were a perverted and misogynistic way for men to treat women as sexual objects. "We are not sexual objects for men to view from the roofs of buildings and I encourage all women to boycott Beer Mile this year," she said. When asked if she would use the viewing stations she replied, "I might, just to make sure it doesn't get out of line. Plus, I might see some cute freshmen boys." But, as Professor of Anthropology Josh Long points out, the viewing stations are more of a way to bring the community together than a sexual perversion. He said he plans to attend Beer Mile for the first time this year because he finally got tenure, but said the fact that it is now more of a community spectacle made him interested, too. "Before, Beer Mile was just a bunch of drunk people running around naked," he said. "But with an audience, it becomes a spectacle, a community tradition. That visual experience is really important — something like the Olympics or, yes, the Beer Mile right here at Whitman isn't a spectacle without the audience." PHOTO BY KLAG

Midterms climax influences hard studying

lounge of your dorm. Dating first-years is hard.

by JENNA MUKUNO

“Ja Rule”

At RCC Elevator, Male, Blonde

When we reached the third floor you turned to me and said, “I just took it to another level.”

At Lakum Dukum, Female, Other In previous years, Beer Mile peepers have resorted to hiding behind trees, cameras at the ready, and creeping behind hedges to take detailed notes. PHOTOS BY FENNELL

You were giving a tour and acted like you knew who I was. You’ve made my life a living hell.

At Jewett, Male, Brunette

When you spank the monkey in the pull-out bed two feet from my face, I wanna make modern art in the porcelain bus.

At all around campus, males

Wearin’ flannel, loose cargos, no shoes, granola dingleberries on your beard, MMMMM.

At Olin, Female, Red

You cut me off during class to say, “Building off that point … ”

At PartyHouse, Female, Brunette

When “S&M” came on, you handcuffed yourself to the bathroom door so no one could pee.

At Pio Office, Female, Brunette

You took all of my quotes out of context. I looked like a douche bag in print. Thanks, liberal media.

At Your Place, Female, Other

Watching Fellini’s “8 1/2” in the common

At SciBuild, Male, Blonde

Shed a tear during “Three Cups of Tea: One Man’s Mission to Promote Peace … One School at A Time," then muttered "deeply moving."

At Café ’41, Unknown, Unknown

You purchased the last pack of Cherry-Flavored Yogurt-Covered Pretzels on the deadline of my thesis. If I knew who you are, I'd throw my extra-hot, dirty, skinny chai all over your candy ass.

At Maxey Auditorium, Male, Other

You’re the asshole who won’t stop asking the questions that were previously addressed, of no relevance whatsoever, made solely to launch your own agenda, filled the silence that everyone agreed was the conclusion of the presentation, allowed you to get recognition before the signing so he or she might “know” you, and overall provoked the speaker to the point that he will never return to Walla Walla.

At Tamarac, Male

Your addiction to Bowling for Soup (B4S) sends shivers down my spine.

On LikeALittle

You posted this: “At CA: Male, Brunette : restrained.distance. inhibitions.thoughts.impulses. this next week will drive me crazy." Keep your Moleskine-bound thoughts where they ILLUSTRATION BY VON HAFFTEN

‘M-­tees’ overcome ghost of propellers past from MANATEES

ADVERTISEMENT

SAVE THE AVIARY! Join us as the birds perform a reenactment of “Black Swan”

All proceeds will save our cages! Tickets are 40 dollars.

Price does not include anti-shit ponchos

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feeds their at-risk behavior. We’re here to raise awareness and show these manatees that someone out there cares about them.” Population density due to habitat destruction has made ghettos of their marshy homes. Additionally, manatees are often teased and harassed by their more lovable dolphin cousins. Such harassment, paired with the pressure of their poor living conditions, drives these gentle creatures to self-destructive behavior. They get involved with drugs and gangs. Even pups become ensnared in this vicious cycle, becoming seaweed runners and intentionally seeking scars from close encounters with boats to make themselves look “more badass.” The Manatee Program has

paired Whitman students with some of these pups. Students have been writing letters and video chatting their marine pen pals since the beginning of the semester. “Corresponding with my manatee Shannon has been a really rewarding experience,” said first-year Del Day. “In addition to making me aware of the manatee’s plight, it’s taught me how to be a supportive role model.” “Eeeee ee eeeeeeeeeeeee,” shared Shannon in an e-mail. “Manatees to Campus Day is a celebration of the bond we’ve created,” said Day. “I just hope my manatee doesn’t get the squirts when he sees the jump house.” Echida is very excited to see her dream come to fruition. “At first we were worried about

getting funding,” conceded Echida. “But we got approval without a hitch. ASWC even offered to fly the manatees first class!” The program is scheduled to have various games and presentations, including an instructional seminar on dodging water crafts (the next installment of the Red Dot series – “Slow down Speed Boat”) as well as the lecture “‘Bovine of the Waves’: Reappropriating the Derogatory Term ‘Sea Cow’.”Echida is very excited to see her dream come to fruition.

CORRECTIONS

There are no corrections we'd like to make. WHAT WE SAY GOES. THIS IS THE FUCKING PIO.


MAR

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31 2011

BACK PAGE JACK ED BY “PUZ ZLE ESCO RT” I

Puzzle slut stages hostile takeover

n a desperate attempt to regain dignity, Adam “Puzzle Slut” Brayton seized control of the Backpage by means of brute force this past Monday. He now holds two hostages: humor editor Diana Dulek and staff writer Cari Cortez. Witnesses described Brayton as “frothing at the mouth” and “going apeshit, man.” The following day, Brayton claimed that his demands were simple. “I simply want a little bit of dignity,” he stated, “and being that one guy who’s the ‘Puzzle Slut’ gets really degrading after a while. I can do better than that. I’m classier than that.” Adam has been known by several different aliases beyond his typical moniker of “Puzzle Slut.” These include, but are not limited to “Braytron the Slutbot,” “Forrest Hump,” “Snatch Adams,” and “Tits.” In a public statement, Brayton alluded that he would no longer accept these nicknames.

MESSAGE FROM THE PUZZLE SLUT

He did remark that he would gladly accept new nicknames that portrayed him in a better light, such as Puzzle Escort or maybe even something nicer than that. Interns at the counseling center have performed an assessment of Brayton’s mental state. In a press release, they confirmed that Brayton has “indeed lost his marbles.” The location of Dulek and Cortez has not been ascertained as of yet, but yellow jackets are on constant watch for the hostages. When asked for at least a clue toward finding the missing Pioneer staff members, Brayton responded with an obscure reference to Rihanna’s hit song “S&M.” “We’re terrified not only because we don’t know where our cherished staff are or in what peril they are in,” Pioneer Editor-inChief Derek Thurber commented, “but also because we don’t know whether the answer to that clue is an abbreviation or not."

Dear Lovers, In order to prove my versatility beyond my restrictive role as a mere “Puzzle Slut,” I have chosen to switch this week’s puzzle to the ever-popular Sudoku. These puzzles are so kinky that people won’t have a choice but to call me by a different nickname! I mean, there’s numbers instead of letters! How outlandishly sexy is that?! It gets me hot and bothered just thinking about these puzzles. I’ve never tried these things before, so they might be a little bit rough; hopefully it isn’t too hardcore for you all. I’ll be making Sudokus until I get the gratitude and appreciation that I deserve for my hard work. No pity puzzling! Thank you for your support with my personal revolution. I will come out on top! Love, Adam Brayton Puzzle Escort

SUDOKU The following are Sudoku puzzles that are difficult to the point that they cannot be conventionally ranked. Therefore, the following Sudoku puzzles are creatively named to accurately describe how horrible they will be to complete. The slightly thicker lines that typically mark sections of the grid aren’t displayed so that the difficulty is amplified by a power of ten. Enjoy!

SNUGGLES THE MEAT GRINDER

TROLL 2

THE GRUNDLE CHUNDERER

REBECCA BLACK

VOMIT NOISES

3-2

BABIES ON SPIKES

STARVATION

NUCLEAR WAR


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