Who's Jack 44

FOR THE REST OF US

ISS 44/JAN

/ ABOUT In five years Jack has gone from an idea to putting on live events, urban festivals, had a bi-monthly, A5 fanzine that grew into a monthly A4 glossy magazine and launched Who’s Jack online and Jack TV. Today Who’s Jack is going from strength to strength, largely due to the attitude of its creators.

Jack began because we wanted something more, something attainable, something relatable and something lacking in arrogance. Something for the rest of us.

/ FROM JACK 2011 is finally here, after a mound of snow, travel and sale chaos we have made it through and although possibly with fatter bellies and a bit of a sore head we are looking forward to it.

You may notice a few changes in this January Issue, similar to the new index layout we introduced last issue (right) we have now shuffled the contents of the magazine accordingly.

Therefore you will now find all our fashion together, music together and so on in the order shown in the index (left to right). We hope that this will make it easier for you all to flick to your favourite bits of Jack and also introduce you without any confusion to the areas we cover that you might not have immediately been drawn to!

If you don’t like it, or if you love it, always let us know as Jack is of course, for you lot and we want to keep you happy. Any comments can be sent to press@whos-jack.co.uk or of course posted on the web, www.whosjack.org.

Happy New Year!

Jack Loves You More.

Lu x

/ HOW TO GET INVOLVED Whether you are a band, a brand, a designer or simply want to tell us about something, get in touch. General enquiries can be sent to: press@whos-jack.co.uk, contributions can be sent to: contributions.jack@googlemail.com, finally, advertising enquiries can be sent to: tom@whos-jack.co.uk.

Who’s Jack likes a good collaboration, event or campaign.

We can work with you or for you.

Get in touch.

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/ ON JACK TV THIS MONTH Don’t forget Jack TV, see behind the scenes at fashion shoots and interviews and other bits of juicy content in glorious video format over at www.whosjack.org/jacktv. This month see our recent tour diaries with new additions Josh Weller (with a little cameo from Paloma Faith) and Local Natives before their show at Kentish Town Forum. This month you can also see what the Gilly Hicks girls and Abercrombie and Fitch boys got up to when they came over on an open top bus with a lot of knickers to launch the new Gilly Hicks Store in Westfield last month. www.whosjack.org/jacktv

folloown us tter Twi t e r . c o m /

THIS IS

/ ISSUE 44 . JAN / 2011

FASHION

MUSIC

6. Men’s Fashion James focuses on hats for the cold months still ahead.

8. Jewellery Fashion Story Keeping it simple with nothing but necklaces, rings and cuffs.

18. The Future of Fashion Leila takes a look at the designers to expect on catwalks and in fashion pages over 2011.

29. How To Wear It : Old Master Style How to take tips from the old masters when wearing fur.

30. A Clear New Year A fashion story that centers on all things white.

35. Fit For A Palace SS/11 lace and cream 42. This Is England The rebirth of skinhead style.

46. Music Review One Liners James speaks plainly about what we should be listening to, downloading and binning.

47. Rory’s Music Column Rory does the hard work for you and digs out those artists who are just about to be discovered, use the knowledge wisely.

40. Two Door Cinema Club Laura chats to the boys about their fans and their swift journey to fame so far.

52. Morning Parade EMI’s new signing who are now taking the internet by storm and have music that’s ‘near on perfect’.

FILM

ART & DESIGN 3

56. Film Mark helpfully goes through every film you should be going to see this month, and what you may want on DVD. 59. Why Is It Not The Future Yet? Ever wonder where all the hover boards are? Why we don’t wear silver and space boots to work? So do we.

Mark muses, are we better or worse off than futuristic films predicted?

61. This Is Vicky Mclure Laura meets the star that stole the show on the recent TV re-visit to This Is England.

67. Black Swan A look at Aranofskys new foray into the dark world of the ballerina.

68. Art Spotter : The Riflemaker A look at this hidden away gem of a gallery and what shows it has on currently and coming up over the next few months.

69. The Art Calendar 2011 Donna gives you a handy start listing the main art events to look out for this year and to add to your new 2011 diary.

LIFE & LONDON 72. Look At Me Know Esme delves into your photo albums and comes out with a fascinating collection of photographs throughout the lives of 6 people showing we can get better with age rather than New Years resolutions.

76. Beauty All the treatments and ointments you will need to repair the damage done over Christmas and New Year.

78. Dating Georgina almost slips when she has a niggling thought that maybe a boyfriend would be a good idea (it’s OK Georgina, we wont be sacking you) 79. I Ain’t Saying She’s A Gold Digger Adam looks into the pre-nup, with some insightful amounts famous couple have won in their tempestuous divorces.

80. Pick of The Month January’s choice of where to go, what to see and what to take home.

82. My 2-4-1 Pound Life Lucy’s guide to lips.

83. Shit Lit The books that are perfect for the Commute.

/ TEAM JACK / CONTRIBUTORS

Editor : Louise O-F louise@whos-jack.co.uk

Dept Editor : Laura Hills laura@whos-jack.co.uk

Film : Mark Williams mark@whos-jack.co.uk

Fashion Ed: Leila Hartley leila@whos-jack.co.uk

Comment : Adam Roan Henderson adam@whos-jack.co.uk

Music : James Lynch james@whos-jack.co.uk

Film online : Matt Hamm matt@whos-jack.co.uk

Comment: Lucy Hancock

Dating : Georgina Childs

Photography: Christopher Sims

Styling : Sara Darling

Comment: Esme Riley

Comment : Luke hayward

Music: Rory Broadfoot

Photography: Barry MacDonald

Styling: Rickardo Mattocks Maxwell

Photography : Kris Mhyre

Art : Maria Howard

Fashion: Ella Davidson

Photographer: Felix Cooper

Further Contributing writers : Donna Marie Howard // Katie Service // Eleanor Davidson // Katerina Pantelides Illustrations/Artwork/Layout : LOF // pandamilk : www.pandamilk.co.uk // Anne-Sophie Rosenvinge-Skov // Katie Allen // Cover Image : Felix Cooper // Want to see your work in Jack? Contributions : contributions.jack@googlemail.com The Jack-Father : Edward Fitzpatrick // Who’s Jack Ltd All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part with out the permission of Who’s Jack. The opinions expressed in this magazine are not necessarily the opinions of Who’s Jack. Who’s Jack Ltd can not be held responsible for any breach of copyright arising from any material supplied. Who’s Jack, 93 Barker Drive, Camden, London, NW1 0JG

jack / STOCKISTS

NORTH

WEST

Camden Blues Kitchen:

111 - 113 Camden High Street, NW1 7JN www.theblueskitchen.com

The Old Queens Head:

44 Essex Road, Islington, N1 8LN www.theoldqueenshead.com

The Hawley Arms:

2 Castlehaven Road, NW1 8QU www.thehawleyarms.co.uk

The Lexington:

96-98 Pentonville Road, N1 9JB www.thelexington.co.uk

The Keston Lodge:

131 Upper Street, N1 1QP www.kestonlodge.com

The Lock Tavern:

35 Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8AJ www.lock-tavern.co.uk

Shock and Soul:

46 Essex Road, Islington, N1 8LN www.shockandsoul.co.uk

The Westbury:

34 Kilburn High Street, NW6 5UA www.westburybar.com

SOUTH

Rough Trade:

130 Talbot Road, W11 1JA www.roughtrade.com

Defectors Weld :

170 Uxbridge Road, W12 8AA www.defectors-weld.com

Size? - (in London stores):

200 Portobello Road, Notting Hill, W11 1LB www.size.co.uk

CENTRAL Beyond the Valley:

2 Newburgh Street, W1F 7RD www.beyondthevalley.com

Number 22:

22 Carnaby Street, W1F 7DB

55 DSL:

10A Newburgh St, W1F 7RN www.55dsl.com

Chateau Roux:

17 Newburgh Street, W1F 7RZ www.chateauroux.co.uk

Tatty Devine:

44 Monmouth Street, WC2H 9EP www.tattydevine.com

Bar Story:

213 Blenheim Grove, Peckham, SE15 4QL

The Sun and 13 Cantons:

21 Great Pulteney Street, W1F 9NG

Bullfrog:

20 Greenwich Church Street, SE10 9BJ www.bullfrogs.co.uk

Candy Cakes:

Monmouth Street, WC2H 9EP www.candycakes.com

The Rest Is Noise:

442 Brixton Road, Brixton, SW9 8EJ www.therestisnoisebrixton.com

Size? - (in London stores):

Carnaby Street, Soho, W1F 7DW www.size.co.uk

Bullfrog:

20 Greenwich Church Street, SE10 9BJ www.bullfrogs.co.uk

Size? - (in London stores):

37a Neal Street, Covent Garden, WC2H 9PR www.size.co.uk

Banquet Records:

52 Eden Street, Kingston, KT1 1EE www.banquetrecords.com

Fopp:

1 Earlham Street, WC2H 9LL www.foppreturns.com

Mint:

20 Earlham Street, WC2 H9LN www.mintvintage.co.uk

EAST Paper Dress:

114-116 Curtain Road, EC2A 3AY www.paperdressboutique.blogspot.com

Behave:

50 Lexington Street, W1F oLR

Vintage Store:

182 Brick Lane, E1 6SA

Sanctum Hotel:

20 Warwick Street Soho, W1B 5NF www.sanctumsoho.com

The Lazy Ones:

102m Sclater Street, E1 6HR www.thelazyones.blogspot.com

The Hospital Club:

24 Endell Street, London, WC2H 9HQ www.thehospitalclub.com

Beyond Retro:

110-112 Cheshire Street, E2 6EJ 58-59 Great Marlborough Street, W1F 7JY www.beyondretro.com

The Book Club:

100 Lenard Street, EC2A 4RH www.wearetbc.com

Beyond Retro:

110-112 Cheshire Street, E2 6EJ 58-59 Great Marlborough Street, W1F 7JY www.beyondretro.com

Behave:

14 Hanbury Street, E1 6QR

Pure Groove:

6-7 West Smithfield, EC1A 9JX www.puregroove.co.uk

Pirate Pop Up Shop:

27 Clerkenwell Road, London EC1M 5RN

LCB Surf Store:

121 Bethnal Green Road, London E2 7DG www.lcbsurfstore.co.uk

Rough Trade East:

Old Truman Brewery, 91 Brick Lane, E1 6QL www.roughtrade.com

The Victoria:

110 Grove Road, Mile End, E3 5TH www.thevictoriae3.com

Also with online orders of Urban Outfitters : www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk

See an up to the minute list of stockists online, if you would like to stock Who’s Jack contact: press@whos-jack.co.uk All stockists have magazines delivered once a month in the first week of each month. We would advise getting to stockists early as they go quick.

5

James Lynch

FASHION FOR THE BOYS Hats your lot.

A good hat can say a lot about a man but at this time of year it is really just saying that you are being sensible and keeping warm. It is a well-known and oft-quoted piece of dubious wisdom that you lose the majority of body heat out of the top of head. To combat this by wearing a hat is a simple enough solution but which hat to wear can be a big headache (pun very much intended!).

So, to help you all out I have some very fashionable suggestions for you. First up, and my personal favourite, is the humble Bobble Hat. The rambler’s head wear of choice has undergone quite a renaissance recently and this has been typified by the popularity of Penfield’s logo hats and the colourful asymmetric designs of Supremebeing among young urban artists.

The Bobble Hat is a good place to start for any man unsure of what to place on their shivering bonce as they come in a huge variety of designs, knits and thicknesses. There are the retro ski hats that take their influences and colour palettes from the 70s and 80s, with bold stripes of navy and red and the occasional smattering of snowflake designs. For those not thrilled at the prospect of dressing like a child from the early 90s, then might I suggest a thicker, cable knit and single colour hat, a more dignified and versatile option.

As a slight variation on the bobble theme there is also another, perhaps more high street, version of the Bobble Hat that seems to just be an elongated model. Basically the oversized beanie once so loved by transatlantic Essex raconteur Russell Brand but now relegated to the boy band ranks of JLS and The Wanted, has been given the slight upgrade of a bobble by the likes of All Saints.

That’s not to say that the oversize beanie is not still sitting proudly on the heads of those few afraid to change and if they’re still not convinced by the bobble then there are a couple more styles to take into consideration.

There is the Trapper Hat, which pushed its way into our shopping bags last year and has once again proved its furry popularity this winter. Boasting the added extra of ear flaps, this lumberjack style should be worn as big and fluffy as possible, so much so that if someone was to squint at you they would be convinced you were a lion.

And then as a classic choice there is the beanie. But not any old beanie and definitely not one that is big enough to sit on your forehead and therefore actually warm your head much. No, instead you should be prepared to wear a tiny version of it far back on your head, like a knitted kippah. Team this with a navy pea coat and you should be channelling the very masculine ‘dockworker’ look. (Pipe and tattoos are optional) Any or all of these hats should put you and your snow-laden scalp in good stead for the coming wintery months… my final words of advice will simply be to look at anything Dappy, Captain Prat of N-Dubz, is wearing and how he is wearing it and do exactly the opposite, trust me.

Paul Smith £52.00 www.paulsmith.co.uk

Deisel £25.00 www.tuccistore.co.uk

River Island £14.99 www.riverisland.com Ignite £28.00 www.jamesandjames.com

Shred Head £23.95 www.shredhead.com

Allsaints £30.00 www.allsaints.com

Allsaints £30.00 www.allsaints.com

Nobis Jaye £39.99 www.zuzinno.com

Featured colorway

PLATTAN AUBERGINE Models: TANTO MEDIS

Available in 12 colors:

7

Feature 3.5mm standard microphone and remote.

www.urbanears.com hello@urbanears.com

Photo: Vincent Skoglund

JEWELLERY

photographer: Kris Myhre stylist: Leila Hartley make up and hair: Mira Parmar using MAC Pro models: Symara at Cosmic and Ruby Slate Bathazar

Renaissance Life silver clock pendant ÂŁ89 Renaissance Life black clock pendant ÂŁ89

9

House of Harlow peacock cuff : £157 at Oxygen boutique : www.oxygenboutique.com / Imogen Belfield asteroid ring : £300 at Kabiri : www.kabiri.co.uk / Scosha sun ring : £161 at Kabiri / A Peace Treaty chiras rings : £166 at Kabiri / MyFlashTrash tiger eye ring : £49 : www.myflashtrash.com

Symara wears: Urban Outfitters body chain : £12 : www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk / Imogen Belfield asteroid ring : £300 at Kabiri / Scosha sun ring : £161 at Kabiri / A Peace Treaty chiras rings : £166 at Kabiri : www.kabiri.co.uk / Ruby wears: A Peace Treaty jalez necklace £194 at Kabiri / ByRogue knuckle duster £267 at Kabiri / MyFlashTrash tiger eye ring : £49 : www.myflashtrash.com

11

Renaissance Life horseshoe triple necklace : £99 / Renaissance Life donkey pendent : £86 / Freedom flower pendent £8 at Topshop : www.topshop. co.uk /Freedom turtle pendent £8 at Topshop

13

Cabinet collar : £224 at Kabiri / Renaissance Life globe necklace as bracelet : £79 / Renaissance Life bracelet : £49 / Flutter ring set : £73 at Kabiri / Freedom wings ring : £8 at Topshop / MyFlashTrash Montana ring : £45

Symara wears: Lucy Hutching peacock breastplate : £459 at Liberty : www.liberty.co.uk House of Harlow three stack bangle : £113 at Oxygen boutique / Urban Outfitters black suede heels £95 Ruby wears: Lucy Hutching necklace : £513 at Liberty / New Look nude heels : £22.99 : www.newlook.com

15

Symara wears: Lucy Hutching baul baul necklace : £310 at Liberty / Lucy Hutching baul baul ring : £202 at Liberty Ruby wears: Lucy Hutching earrings : £216 at Liberty / Lucy Hutching cuff : £350 at Liberty

Symara wears: Mawi necklace : £351 at Harvey Nichols and Selfridges : www.

HarveyNichols.com Ruby wears: Mawi necklace : £378 at Harvey Nichols and Selfridges

17

Leila TAKES US THROUGH ....

G N I H T E M O S O T N O I KNEW I WAS WHEN I GAVE YOU MY LIST OF DESIGNERS TO WATCH IN 2010 LAST JANUARY.

All of them went on to produce highly successful SS/11 collections, with the exception of Holly Russell who is studying hard for her MA and I can’t wait to see what she does next. Sophie Hulme’s latest collection, now stocked in Selfridges, includes a simple and chic brass fastened coat as well as jackets and macs with girlie frills and bow details and a 1984 style utilitarian jumpsuit. To

accompany this, Sophie has also created a series of kahki and blue leather totes with tortoiseshell and brass armoured panels. Maria Francesca Pepe won Newgen sponsorship for her AW/10 collection, the jewellery from which was featured in last months issue. Her SS/11 collection is rather sinister, with skeleton motifs on chunky crosses and in print form on dresses. The gold body chains that constricted each model were reminiscent of spider webs. LF Markey has continued with her signature jewel-like block colour pieces which are available from her website, including a lovely bright blue boxy jacket and a cute pink and red body. Gemma Slack’s summer collection contains as much leather as last year but with a nod to the season in flower motifs. I particularly love the trompe l’oeil breast vest. Gemma has also recently introduced swimwear and menswear to the label.

Perhaps the biggest success story in womenswear this season is Holly Fulton. In only a year her pieces have transformed from Fashion East sponsored cute dresses with quite literal prints inspired by the New York skyline to an incredibly sophisticated collection of swimwear, separates and beautiful palazzo pants in exotic, almost Aztec prints for the modern day Brigitte Bardot.

Holly’s trademark Perspex accessories were complimented by touches of raffia and Swarovski crystals in a show that attracted all the right editors to the front row.

Judging by the reception Men’s Day received last Fashion Week it seems London menswear is really where it’s at. Three of my designers to watch last year, J.W. Anderson, Carolyn Massey and

James Long, have developed in leaps and bounds in the space of a year. After great interest in his menswear collections from the girls, me included, Jonathan Anderson (of J.W. Anderson) created his first womenswear collection for next summer. Both were like a 70s hippy hallucination of paisley and dip-dye studded with chokers, denim, braces and William Gedney prints. Recently, Jonathan has been made creative director of classic menswear label Sunspel. Carolyn’s SS/11 collection landed her the prestigious MacAurthurGlen Spirit of Fashion Award judged by a plethora of RCA professionals. Her static SS/11 presentation attracted the biggest queue I saw during Fashion Week and included some very heavy-duty leather hardware; a giant doctors bag and backpack with detachable box. James’ show also drew in the crowds, adding to his reputation as the prince of knitwear with his marbleized Woodstock inspired collection. Since last year, Men’s Day has grown massively in scale and popularity.

For SS/10 many London menswear designers were touting their wares to empty seats; not this season. Some designers even attracted national womenswear publications, while the previous year seemed to be geared toward the menswear specialist.

MARIA FRANCESCA PEPE

ON THE FOLLOWING PAGES I BRING YOU MY PREDICTIONS FOR THE FUTURE OF FASHION IN 2011. WE’LL HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL NEXT JANUARY TO SEE IF I’M RIGHT AGAIN.

JW ANDERSON

LF MARKEY

CAROLYN MASSEY

19 19

HOLLY FULLERTON

JAMES LONG

f o e r u t u F The n o i COMING SOON! h s Fa

(overleaf)

A YEAR IN FASHION ...

photographer: Felix Co oper stylist: Leila Hartley stylist assistant: Ella Davidson make up and hair sty list: Mira Parmar models: Anna at Booki ngs and Hubert at D1 location: Thanks to Ric cardo, Manuele, Tara, Antonia and Harri

THE FUTURE OF FASHION.

21

Hubert wears: Shirt : £260 at Machine-A Quilted patch jeans : £180 at Machine-A Anna wears: Sheer top : £110 at Machine-A Daisy rings : silver : £33, thin gold : £61, flowery gold : £65 Machine-A www.machine-a.com William Richard Green www.williamrichardgreen.com

Anna wears: navy dress : £170 Gogo Philip snake necklace : £14 at Topshop Clemens en August www.clemensenaugust.com

Clemens en August are remarkable for their innovative and original method of selling. Each season the designers tour cities famed for their fashion and culture such as London, Munich, Zurich, Vienna and Tokyo, hosting pop-upshops in contemporary art galleries for only three days at a time. Who’s Jack wholly disagrees with the way young designers are stocked in expensive boutiques making them inaccessible to fashion conscious youngsters. Luckily for you, the Clemens en August system cuts out the middle-man, providing beautifully crafted and exclusive pieces at affordable prices. The current collection is also available to purchase online and it features dresses and separates in beautiful prints and luxury fabrics, including a camel wool blazer and a rusty gold trouser and shirt combination. Sign up to the mailing list on the website to receive the 2011 tour dates.

Like Carolyn Massey, Matthew Miller graduated from the Royal College of Art and also won the MacArthur Glen Spirit of Fashion Award in 2010. With an aesthetic based on construction and performance, Matthew is a truly modern tailor, using traditional techniques with technology and performance fabrics like tyvek and neoprene. His SS/11 collection ‘Form=Function’ is inspired by Dieter Ram’s design philosophy which is based on a phrase ‘form ever follows function’ coined

by American Architect Louis Sullivan. Matthew has been questioning what makes good design, which in today’s world is equally as important as function.

Matthew cites Apple as a brand that follows this attitude. His collection includes tailoring with more casual pieces, ideal for the new age gentleman. He also produced handy shopper bags and innovative garments that fold up into their pockets. With the support of MacArthur Glen we look forward to Matthew’s next foray into urban tailoring.

How does a radiographer from rural Australia become the knitwear innovator of 2011? Well, I’m not quite sure but Brooke Roberts has done exactly that. After studying in Sydney with a love of science and anatomy, Brooke found herself in London attending both LCF and CSM and has now launched her own label while consulting for a menswear brand. Her science background influences every aspect of the design process and her SS/11 collection, ‘Cuts’ takes CT scans and translates them into tubular knitted pieces.

Brooke used mainly brain scans for the collection and created layers by stitching transparent and opaque panels. The result is an incredibly delicate but visually stunning collection including everything from long sleeved dresses to socks and a body suit, as well as plainer knitted pieces. As Brooke herself says, medical science meets fashion, and they get along very nicely. At a time when the cyclical nature of fashion seems tedious, talent like Brooke’s is extremely important and we expect big things from her.

Hubert wears: Long sleeved shirt £280.80 Navy Gabardine jacket £810 Grey shorts £297 Marshall headphones £90 at HMV Matthew Miller www.matthew-miller.net Anna wears: Chunky knit Sheer knit top Socks American Apparel knit skirt £42 Urban Outfitters brown leather heels £95 Brooke Roberts www.brookeroberts.net

23

Hubert wears: Jacket Cotton shirt Jeans James Small www.jamessmallmenswear.com

James Small caught my eye last Fashion Week with his SS/11 collection of beautiful floral, leopard and Breton prints. These are mixed up with simple classic pieces to form an incredibly wearable collection for the fashion aware (although the ultra-short shorts are only for the very brave). With light chiffons and short sleeved tees James captures the very essence of British summer time in ‘Journey’, a film directed

by Tom Beard shot in the Cotswolds with Super 8 and digital cameras. James’ attention to detail is impeccable with features like button down flap fastenings on the trousers and tops.

We’re genuinely looking forward to the next installment of James’ hazy daydream.

Hubert wears: Rubber top £180 at Machine-A Shorts £170 at Machine-A Gogo Philips chain necklace £16 at Topshop Machine-A www.machine-a.com William Richard Green www.williamrichardgreen.com

The starting point of William Richard Green SS/11 collection was a yellow Sou’wester he wore aged one, hence the yellow accents and waxed fabrics.

Will combines heavy leather and metal elements with rubber, quilted details and lighter tees and vests. Touches of rope add to the nautical feel of the collection. Next season Will’s going in a totally different direction, influenced by his butcher brother who keeps his own pigs and chickens. He’s also inspired by Vikings, which happens to be the name of his new club night, he’s a DJ too you know. Will is another of those truly visionary British menswear designers with incredible training having studied at CSM and worked under Henry Poole on Saville Row and with the classic furrier Hockley. Despite this Will works predominantly with denim and leisurewear fabrics, although his current collection displays an ability to master any fabric he chooses. The collection is currently stocked in Machine-A, a cutting edge concept boutique and gallery space established

by Stavros Karelis.

Anna wears: Sketchy flower dress : £69.00 Coco Fennell www.cocofennell.com

Coco Fennell has designed an affordable line of fun and stylish printed dresses, inspired in part by designers, like Jeremy Scott, that don’t take themselves too seriously. On paper Coco could be construed as another celebrity daughter-come-model-come-designer; she’s got the interesting first name, Theo Fennell (jewellery designer) as a father, a successful actress sister and she’s absolutely beautiful. In reality however, she is lovely, hard working and will not stop until she can make a living from her label. Coco’s collection of dresses and accessories started with her desire to create flattering shapes for different body types. By producing each shape in plain colours, girlie prints and more outlandish prints, we get to decide how we wear each shape. Coco must have an almost endless supply of clothes as she loves to wear her own designs, throwing them on in the morning and taking her from day to night. Her ideal client would be Marina (of the Diamonds) or anyone who has fun with what they wear. Look out for illustrator collaborations and a general expansion of Coco Fennell in the future.

Michael Brown is young, good-looking, talented and is the creative director of Frater, my new favourite, affordable menswear brand. Who’s Jack chatted to him about his work.

Hubert wears: Liberty t-shirt : £40 Jacket : £100 American Apparel work trouser : £61 Frater www.fraterclothing.com

Who’s Jack: How did you get into design?

Michael Brown: I’ve always been hugely inspired by art and design in every aspect of my life from fine art, history of art, graphics and photography to fashion. I’ve studied design ever since I can remember, and it has always been in my life. Perhaps, the way I now approach design has evolved, also my interests and ideas have matured but the passion for design has definitely always been there.

WJ: Why menswear?

MB: Why not? Erm, it’s something that obviously just came naturally for me as a designer. It’s something I feel passionate about and certainly I feel Frater can change the way menswear is approached. I want to create something inspiring and unique which people will feel passionate about. My worst fear is to go unnoticed. Frater itself means ‘brother’ in Latin, which the whole ethos of the company is derived from. Frater was created through, and continues to be inspired by, friends coming together, from the models to the photographer and the prints, in order to make something distinctive.

WJ: What’s the inspiration behind the collection?

MB: There are so many different inspirations in this collection! Frater is definitely influenced by music culture, it’s hugely important to me, and I believe goes hand in hand with art and fashion. The whole idea behind this collection was to make an impact, and for the public to feel something for the collection whether they love or hate it.

We didn’t want to create something boring that has been done a hundred times before.

WJ: What’s your design process?

MB: We change the designs right up until the last minute because I feel something could always be a little better or different. Looking back at past collections I always feel as if I would change certain details because it’s never finished, you just run out of time.

Like Da Vinci said, ‘Art is never finished only abandoned’.

WJ: Nice art history reference. Do you wear your own designs?

MB: Absolutely. I consider it a huge privilege to wear the designs we have created, something we can be proud of. I can’t wait for the next samples to start coming through the door.

WJ: Who would you like to see in your clothes?

MB: Well we have been really lucky so far with personal requests from Bombay Bicycle Club for the spring summer collection, also Crystal Castles have got some of our older t-shirts and Devlin was recently shot in another item. We’d dress anyone who feels passionate about the brand and the clothes. But we are more focused on getting the Frater name and meaning across to the public.

WJ: What’s next for you and Frater?

MB: 2011... Frater will take huge steps forward in all aspects. Each collection

to come will be hugely influenced by art, design, fashion, music, just all aspects of life really, it’s exciting. It is fun to look back in to the history book and find elaborate tales, time periods and ideologies to inspire our collections. When designing I don’t have one set path to follow, so it’s fun seeing where it takes you.

WJ: Will you ever stop?

MB: The day it doesn’t excite me anymore is when I will stop doing it.

Stolen Girlfriends Club is a New Zealand brand that was established in 2005 by three surfers, Marc Moore, Luke Harwood and Dan Gosling. These guys got together to make shirts for their girlfriends (or stolen girlfriends perhaps) to wear home in the morning.

Their AW/10 show at Australia Fashion Week caught the attention of PR agency Robinson Pfeffer who thankfully introduced them to the UK. Now Stolen Girlfriends Club is stocked at Dolls Boutique, Liberty and Start London. Their SS/11 collection stays true to the brands ethos with a sexy yet cool collection of mini dresses, baby dolls, short shorts and shirts. They are the kind of clothes I wish I could wear every day and for that reason, I believe Stolen Girlfriends Club will be huge in 2011. You should probably check them out now before all your friends get there first.

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HOW TO WEAR IT

OLD MASTER STYLE

Maria Howard has taken on the recent trend in an upped interest in olden times (think Downtown Abbey etc). So after taking a good look at the old masters she is now sharing with you all the lessons that are to be learnt from past portraiture for today’s styles.

Learn from the masters and step out in style.

Faux Fur Buckle Gilet Topshop £100

AW10: Fur El Greco A Lady in a Fur Wrap 1577-80

Now I won’t pretend like we’ve never seen fur on the catwalks before. But in the last decade the way it is worn has changed mainly thanks to boring vegetarian celebrities who began championing faux fur as the ethical plat du jour. I say back to good old fashioned real fur. Wear your fox, rabbit or mink with pride and revel in the extra softness that only real animals can offer. Of course I would never advocate ordering a little wabbit to be slaughtered for your fashion needs but we all secretly think vintage fur is alright. The deed is already done, recycling old clothes is good for the planet and hell, they look nice.

The late Renaissance painter El Greco (15411614) chose ermine but as most of us are not royalty I fear you will have to settle for lesser animals. With light coloured fur a little goes a long way so consider a stole or wrap as demonstrated above. Tons of vintage fur can be found on Ebay usually for under a hundred quid. If you’re not convinced, here are two of the best high street faux fur options from Topshop.

Topshop Leopard ‘Vintage’ Faux Fur Coat £98

words : Maria Howard

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A CLEAR NEW YEAR Photographer: Ben Quinton Stylist : Rickardo Mattocks-Maxwell Hair/ make-up : Catherine Chater Models : Olivia @ D1, Camilla This Image Olivia wears jacket : Beyond Retro / scarf : H&M / jumper-Fred : Perry, shorts : American Apparel / tights : Uniqlo / leg warmers :American apparel / boots throughout shoot : Beyond retro / Camilla wears jacket :Beyond Retro / scarf : H&M, jumper : French Connection / shorts :Topshop / socks :Topshop / boots throughout shoot : Beyond Retro.

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Olivia wears : denim jacket : Levi’s / scarf : H&M / top : Uniqlo / shirt :Topshop / trousers-American Apparel / socks : models own / ring : stylist’s own / Camilla wears : jacket : Gap / scarf : H&M / shorts : Riverisland / leg warmers : Miss Selfridge / ring : rock and rose.

Olivia wears : coat : Uniqlo / scarf : H&M / Trousers : American Apparel / Camilla wears : ear muffs :Miss Selfridge / hoddie :Uniqlo / shorts : Levi’s

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Olivia wears : hat-Beyond Retro / coat : Uniqlo / scarf-H&M : Body : stylist’s own / shorts-American Apparel / leggings : Riverisland / gloves : Topshop/ Camilla wears : headband : Topshop / hoddie : Uniqlo / jacket : Beyond Retro / shorts : Uniqlo / leggings : Topshop / leg warmers : Miss Selfridge.

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Fit for a Palace photographer : Helene Sandberg stylist : Beata HadaĹ› assistant stylist : Ilona Kolasa make-up : Zosia Krasuska hair : SĹ‚awek Oszajca model : Karolina at Mango models

dress : Sylwia Rochala 608-190-067, shoes : Zara

Bolero : Agnieszka Maciejak agnieszkamaciejak@gmail.com : tel 602-725-516 / underwear : F&F / shoes : Zara

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Dress : Maldoror www.maldoror.pl : tel. 502728-378 / collar : Agnieszka Maciejak / shoes : Agnieszka Maciejak

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Shirt : Maldoror/ gloves : Ania Poniewierska aniaponiewierska@gmail.com, 604-579-038, underwear : F&F

Dress : Agnieszka Maciejak / gloves : Agnieszka Maciejak, shoes : Zara

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Bolero: Betty Blue / corset : Rafal Kowalski : www. rafalkowalski.com : tel. 502356-873 / underwear : F&F / shoes : H&M

THIS IS ENGLAND words : Ella Davidson

We are all addicted to the fashion nostalgia drug. Walk through any trend setting locale of London and those eras you had firmly packed into boxes and gladly forgotten seem once again to be adorning our streets. If you thought the ‘90s had died with curtain haircuts and double denim, it appears, sadly, you would be wrong. Luckily, with the power of hindsight and perhaps selection, the reinvention of fashion history to form contemporary style can only be a good thing. In the wake of Dr Martens’ 50th anniversary and with the adaptation of Shane Meadows’ This is England into a popular televised series the essence of the Skinhead has been resurrected in contemporary culture. Inevitably the style has followed, surging from exactly the same place it had started, East London.

The Skins are fundamentally misunderstood, marred by the Nationalist right wing factions of the 1980s revival; the core ethics of the original 1960s Trojan Skinheads are largely forgotten. To be a Skin first time around was to recall a time of the dying working class community, before the machine replaced the worker, before your row house was bulldozed in place of de-personalised flats, a time when you actually knew your neighbors. They originally rejected anything mainstream, including politics, and chose instead to form an unconventional ‘family’, one with its own values, music taste and style. Who’s Jack asked a contemporary revival Skinhead Dan Purcell, why he thought people became Skins, he said, ‘It’s a belonging, it’s like everyone who I know who is a Skin, has had something in their past happen to want to give this reaction…and I would agree’.

Their style was an extended caricature of the traditional working class laboring hero or the misled youth from the Victorian Borstal. It’s classic Brit, when everything is changing we retrogress. Check shirts, buttoned to the top, slim fit Levi’s jeans with precise turn-ups, heavy denim jackets, Crombie wool coats, pea head beanies, Dr Martens boots, shaven heads (sound familiar?). The girls too chose to dress like the blokes, shaving their heads as an emblem of alternative femininity. These young women did not want to run a stable home or express their opinions eloquently and calmly like their mothers, they carried weapons, hung around on the back streets and were living testament to the we ‘can look after ourselves just as good as you lot’ attitude. Although the 1960s was seen as a period of sexual and social liberation for women, mainstream fashion, characterised by the designs of Ossie Clark and the ‘Twiggy’ look still adhered to an image of ultra femininity. In true Skin style, the girls of the movement refuted this completely and their presence within the public sphere could be said to have provided an introduction to the escalating androgyny that has persisted in fashion since the ‘80s.

The cyclical nature of style trends is no industry secret. With Daisy Lowe fronting Dr Martens campaign, the success of This is England ’86 and Britain’s love for anything old school it is no surprise that the Skin style has filtered through to contemporary street fashion. The trend this winter for ankle length rolled jeans, plaid shirts matched with oversized hoodies, denim jackets and bovver boots is certainly reminiscent of the workman Skinhead style, if with a baggier grunge twist.

Of course that doesn’t mean if you strap on a pair of DMs and a check shirt you’re instantly trying to be a Skin. Importantly the people wearing the clothes have drastically changed; I don’t think a St Martin’s student, partial to blogging and Thursday nights in Dalston would have quite fitted in with the Petticoat Lane Skins of ’69. The reason for the styles persistence is perhaps tied up within a distinctly British ethic; nostalgia. We continually re-imagine and re-appropriate the past through our present style. Whether it’s modeling ourselves on Rayanne Graff in My So-Called Life, or on the image of the 1960s Skinhead, out of fashion will inevitability be in, authentic will always be prized above the re-made and Britain will always look to the past.

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Nick Knight

REVIEWLINERS MUSIC

ONE

James Lynch

BIN: Skepta Vs N-Dubz So Alive During this painful crawl towards the demise of grimes credibility it is somewhat heartbreaking to hear Skepta assure us that when we look at him, we are looking at grime, as it is probably true seeing as he is the only despairing MC left, but any sympathy felt is completely undone by Dappy who announces, without a hint of irony, that he is ‘Tryin’ to do what Elvis done.’ www.myspace.com/skepta

BIN: Michael Jackson Hold My Hand (Duet with Akon) Despite being billed as a ‘duet’ with prison-lover and one-man ad campaign Akon, this monstrosity is actually the sound of MJ’s controversially deceased corpse being unearthed and shaken until what is left of his money and dignity fall to the ground from his sparkly pockets only to be scooped up by the waiting talons of the American music industry. www.michaeljackson.com

BURN: Jim Noir Zooper Dooper EP Imagine if you were listening to the original Starsky and Hutch soundtrack while playing on a Gameboy in the room next to your brother practicing with his Kraftwerk tribute band and then over the radio comes the news being read by a deadpan Englishman. That sound is the Zooper Dooper EP and if you have imagined that all correctly then there’s probably no point buying it. www.jimnoir.com

BURN: Various Artists Kitsune Maison 10 ‘The Fireworks Issue’ To celebrate the tenth compilation release from the most trend-settingest and genre-defying record label in France and the whole frickin’ world, the Gallic music professors at Kitsune have put together a double CD collection of new artists and old acquaintances which needs no more words wasted on it from me about how good it is. www.kitsune.fr

BOOM: The Neat Hips/Counteract I can be very fickle, and here to prove this are The Neat: with their angular haircuts, oversized charity shop clothes and awkward, thrusty dancing they should provoke all the ire I have inside for other bands who seem to be nothing more than a collection of dickhead chancers but unlike The Drums, these guys are from Hull and that apparently makes everything fine. www.myspace.com/uptheneat

BOOM: David Lynch Good Day Today Not content with befuddling mankind’s collective brain with cult films such as Mulholland Drive and Inland Empire, Lynch has turned his talented hands to making music and Good Day Today is the strange but oddly beautiful synth-pop result, which includes not only Lynch’s own heavily Autotuned voice but also an occasional smattering of gunfire… but of course. www.davidlynch.com

LESSERKNOWN words : Matt Hamm

Telekenisis

Baths

Starlings

A one man band but not in traditional crashing cymbals/step drum sense; Michael Lerner’s solo project has been making waves across the pond in the sea of checked shirt indie pop, with enough killer hooks to etch its way into your daydreaming subconscious. www.myspace.com/telekinesismusic

Not content with guitars, bass and a drum; LA based Baths revel in the musical unknown with Hobbycraft beats of snapping scissors, rustling papers and clicking pens to create almost ethereal rolling melodies that wander aimlessly into a wonderful mess of warm synthy mania. www.myspace.com/bathsmusic

Aiming to fill the void that Alex Turner and his chums left in Sheffield’s music scene, indie-trance-pop foursome Starlings lend singer Justin Robson’s excellent vocals to an 80s synth backdrop that could’ve walked straight from a Simple Minds / Duran Duran album minus the silly haircuts. www.myspace.com/thestarlings

Rory’s Band Picks (terrible title for a column….) words: Rory Broadfoot Each month Rory introduces us to some people we really should be listening to for one reason or another.

Ed Sheeran:

www.edsheeran.com If you believed The Daily Mail you’d think multicultural Britain was a disaster slowly destroying the nation and the British stiff upper lip. In reality the only thing a multi-cultural Britain is destroying is the middle England world of casual racism, Tim Henman and the Daily Mail. Which is a good thing. Fact. What a muliti-cultural Britain is doing is producing artists as astounding as Ed Sheeran. Only in a Britain that is growing up with a new generation less constricted by racial boundaries could a red haired, pasty teenager from Suffolk be making the kind of music that Ed is.

At his core he plays reggae tinged folk backed by loop pedals, tight guitar playing and a voice that I’ve heard reduce grime nights to silent whispered ‘brrraappss’ but it’s his willingness to collaborate with rappers and hip-hop producers (and, indeed, their willingness to collaborate with him) that looks set to launch him to the big time. Weather it’s Youtube videos of him going bar to bar with Devlin, his new collaboration EP with the likes of Wreth32, P Money and Wiley or his deceptively simple song writing something is going to launch this guy into the stratosphere very soon. It will be amazing and annoy the Daily Mail and you can’t ask for more than that.

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Sound Of Rum: www.soundofrum.com

I’ve bigged up poet fronted bands before in this column (the superb Bennin City) and this is another one but if Bennin City produce lyrics that contain a healthy, cheeky wink at life backed by funky grooves then Sound Of Rum ummm, don’t. This time instead of a band vibing on the funk in life we have a band that takes a chilled jazz vibe, sprinkled with Spanish guitars and even a hint of R & B but it’s at the front of this band that the real difference is made. In Kate Tempest, Sound of Rum are fronted by possibly the UK’s most vital and passionate poet. A ball of barley contained fury and energy that unfurls itself in lyrics that can morph from street drinking and the feeling of powerlessness we all experience to discussing Icarus and the true meaning of self. When bands usually try and produce a sound that is intelligent both musically and lyrically they are nearly always god-awful and hugely alienating in their allusiveness. Sound of Rum want you to know they are playing music for you and about the life you lead. Just much, much better than you ever could.

Andrew Davie:

www.myspace.com/andrewdavie There is a great game I like to play which is called ‘The Greatest Band That Never Existed’. Essentially it allows you to make up bands filled with your favourite musicians and to try and work out what kind music they would have made: Frank Sinatra fronting Flying Lotus with Dimebag on lead guitar? Death Lounge Computer Funk. Or Mos Def, Ray Charles and Mogwai? Lyrical noise wall soul. Fun times. One game I don’t play much

www.photographybypip.co.uk

is, ‘Greatest Band That Never Made It’ because it’s no competition. The winner is Cherbourg.

Forever and a day. Cherbourg came out of the same scene that produced Laura Marling, Noah and the Whale and Mumford and Sons and anyone who saw them will tell you they were better than all of them. Much. Whilst every member of the band were astounding musicians the true difference was the lead singer and song writer Andrew Davie. He is, without a shadow of a doubt, the finest song writer Britain has produced in years with an ability to spin any everyday scene or heartbreak (and with Davie it’s nearly always heartbreak) into a symphony of wonder. His songs soar to places other musicians have only heard tales of. He’s now singing solo and Britain, please hold on to him tightly this time.

He’s already slipped through our fingers once, let’s not let it happen again.

If you happen to be a member of a band named Two Door Cinema Club then life must be pretty sweet for you right now.

Following a nomination for the BBC Sound of 2010 the Northern Irish band were propelled on to the music scene faster than you can say, top-20-album. Having spent the best part of last year touring (around 90% according to the bands estimations) and receiving a ridiculous amount of praise for their guitar driven, indie pop the band are about to take some time out to work on their second album but before they got the chance to hide away (they’re looking to get a flat together and everything) Who’s Jack thought we should sit down with them and talk over the year they became somewhat of an unexpected success story...

TWO DOOR CINEMA CLUB words: Laura Hills pictures: Barry MacDonald

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Alex Trimble, Sam Halliday and Kevin Baird (now all 21) met during their time at school in their homestead of Bangor, Northern Ireland. After forming a couple of other unsuccessful bands with various friends the three-some decided to go their own way. Doing odd jobs to give them enough money to get by (including delivering leaflets telling people their water was about to be shut off) the band put any ideas of university to one side to concentrate solely on the band that was now known as Two Door Cinema Club.

‘This time two years ago we weren’t signed, we were just writing songs and supporting tiny bands in tiny rooms playing to ten people,’ says Sam. But things weren’t destined to stay that way forever and in the year that followed TDCC were signed to French label Kitsuné, by the end of 2009 they’d written what would later be released as their first album, Tourist History. It was just a few months before the still unknown band were going to embark on a UK tour that they found out they had been long listed for the prestigious BBC Sound of 2010 award. ‘We were at an airport in Tokyo and I was trying to get rid of my last Yen coins so I was using the internet and I got a message from a friend who was like, ‘Oh My God you’ve been listed on the BBC Sound of 2010 poll’,’ says Kev. ‘At the time even our manager didn’t know about it,’ continues Alex. ‘We thought that there might be a possibility that we’d get on there as a couple of people had mentioned there was a chance as we were

doing quite well in Europe at the time but it was still quite a shock. Although I think it was deserved, we’d worked so hard at the band and it felt nice that it was finally paying off.’ It was still a long road to success for the band and despite noticing a bit more interest in them it seemed they still had a lot to prove with many radio stations simply shunning their songs altogether.

Despite being one of the least critically acclaimed acts on the list and arguably the one with the least media attention TDCC have gone on to enjoy some of the best success amongst their Sound of 2010 peers selling 60,000 copies to date of their aforementioned album and selling out some of the UK’s biggest venues. ‘The first time I really felt like everything was going right for us was in September when we played our first headline UK tour. It was close enough to home that people we knew came and we got the chance to play venues like Shepherds Bush. That was a pretty big deal for us,’ smiles Alex. ‘We went from being a small band where only our mates were interested in seeing us to having actual fans who came to our shows.’ But success was still a steady burner for the band who toured the UK four times before they even did their first proper media interview. ‘It was a steady climb but I quite like that our music wasn’t thrown in people’s faces. We didn’t have a massive push for the album but gradually the fans we did have picked up on it,’ says Kev.

‘There wasn’t a lot of attention on the release but that was a good thing for us because it let the fans discover it for themselves. For that reason we’ve got some really dedicated fans who actually know all the songs rather than just a few,’ continues Alex. These dedicated fans now come out in their forces for the TDCC shows which have become known as much for the ‘Two Door! Two Door!’ chants that come from the audience as the music they play. ‘Of course we noticed a bit more attention on us after we’d appeared in the Sound of 2010 list but I’m glad that there wasn’t a massive interest in us,’ says Sam. ‘It can have a negative effect on a band if there is too much interest too soon. It’s like acts that play on Jools Holland before they have any other material or who do big interviews in music magazines before they’ve recorded their first album, it can be a curse because people will quickly forget about you.’

What has come from TDCC’s heads-down-work-hard attitude is a merry band of dedicated fans from not just here in the UK but all over the world.

Being signed to French label Kitsuné it is fair to say that Europe discovered the band a fair while before we did resulting in them having a big fan base over there.

‘Europe has been great to us,’ says Kev. ‘Even in super fashionable places like Paris people come to the shows and lose their fear of looking uncool and just have a great time.’

[Stop! Jack Time]

At last check the bands Facebook ‘friend’ count was just under 250,000 (an impressive 165,000 more than fellow BBC Sound of 2010 singer Marina and the Diamonds and a damn sight more than other list buddies Delphic and Everything Everything) adding testament to the fact that 2011 is looking to be their biggest year yet. Their fans have taken over the wall with messages of ‘you’re the best band ever’ and messages asking them to play everywhere from Israel to Boston (one fan begs them to play there in the last week of April, presumably that’s the only time she can make it).

‘The other two are really good at getting back to people on Facebook and Twitter but I find it a bit weird.’ confesses Sam, ‘I use those sites to talk to my friends and to catch up on banter but that’s about it’.

Kev’s the opposite, ‘I think they’re a great way for us to keep in touch with our fans.

Having said that, I’ve been getting loads of weird messages from people recently, A guy twittered me the other day to tell me he was off to get his blood pressure checked which was pretty bizarre and then I had another one from someone who had designed a vest which he kindly sent me a picture of.’

It’s not just their fan base size which has changed for the band of recent. A couple of years ago TDCC used a ‘freezing’ van that they brought from a mobile dog grooming company to get from gig to gig.

Today they have a fully equipped tour bus complete with bunk beds for all 10 of their

touring crew. ‘Something I find really weird is that our crew rely on us to make money. I can’t get my head around that,’ contemplates Sam. ‘The bus is like a house to us all now. It’s got everything from an Xbox to a kitchen and we love it. Fans aren’t allowed on the bus though because something might get stolen.

Girls aren’t allowed on it either,’ says Kev to raised eyebrows from the other two.

Having spent the best part of the last year touring (covering America, Australia, Japan, Hong Kong and Western Europe to name a few countries) the band are preparing to take a break to concentrate on writing their second album. ‘We’ve set no direction and no boundaries for the next record so we’re not sure what way it’s going to go yet,’ says Alex. ‘Obviously it won’t sound the same as the first record because if we don’t progress from what we sounded like three years ago when we recorded Tourist History then we’re not going to be happy.’ Despite the bands potential commercial success their management have given them no rules and no tips as to what they want the album to sound like. ‘I don’t think they would ever tell us what type of music to make because that ruins the creativity of the band. If they ever did start trying to tell us what to make we’d probably just tell them to F off. We take advice on a lot of things but our music is our music and no one else can touch that.’

Who is your sound of 2011?

Sam: ‘James Blake, Dry the River, The Cast of Cheers and The Strokes. The Strokes are big every year.’

If you could pick any act to be your opening act who would it be?

Kev: ‘The Beatles. Although everyone would leave before we played so maybe we’d have to pick someone really terrible who didn’t show us up.’

Who would you most like to collaborate with?

Alex: ‘Daft Punk. That’s the dream.’

Where do you get song inspiration from?

Alex: ‘Anything that is an emotion or makes me feel like I want to document it lyrically. It could be about something the three of us have done, relationships, something I’ve read or something I’ve seen. I write them all down in a little book which is filling up pretty fast at the moment.’

Best thing a fan has ever done for you?

Sam: ‘There’s been a few cool things. In Montréal there’s a girl called Rachel who always bakes us nice treats and brings them to our gigs. Someone in Dallas did a painting of me too which was great if a little creepy as she presented it to me while I was eating dinner at a bar.’

If you could have your own Two Door awards, what would they be for?

Alex: ‘Awards to our favourite people for being great so that we could just spend our time in a room with all the best people we know.’

What’s the best present you’ve ever been given?

Alex: ‘I got a bike when I was 2. I was an advanced kid so I had no problems riding it.’

Do you have any new year’s resolutions?

Alex: ‘Myself and Kev are going to give up smoking.’

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images : Barry MacDonald words : Laura Hills

MORNING

PARADE

53 For the last few months of 2010 there was one band on everyone’s lips (and iPods), Morning Parade.

The all male musical five-piece from Harlow in Essex are EMI’s latest signing and are attracting attention from music insiders and music fans alike for their anthemic dance tracks that are tinged with a touch 90s rock.

‘I love The Only Way is Essex, it’s my guilty pleasure. We’re hoping to get a part on it.’

Ahead of our meeting with Morning Parade it was almost impossible to find any information on them other than the basics. There was not a Google image in sight and very few songs available to listen to, something the band say was because of their hectic schedule telling Who’s Jack during an online interview back in October, ‘We didn’t get any press shots done because we didn’t have anything (recorded), we literally spent all of our time writing, rehearsing playing gigs or sleeping’. Now that they’ve finally decided to show their faces I thought it was about time to find out a bit more about them, starting with some common ground, Essex...

‘I love The Only Way is Essex, it’s my guilty pleasure. We’re hoping to get a part on it, maybe we could play in the background of a scene?’ says an enthusiastic Chad.

It was in their Essex hometown of Harlow that Steve Sparrow (vocals), Phil Titus (bass), Chad Thomas (guitar), Ben Giddings (piano/synths) and Andrew Hayes (drums) all came to meet each other. ‘A couple of us went to school and college together but mostly we met through the local band scene,’ says Phil.

During their teenage years the band would meet for rehearsal at their garages, writing and creating the music that would, two years later, lead them to be snapped up by record label EMI. ‘We locked ourselves away and just wrote and wrote and wrote until we felt like our songs we’re near perfect,’ says Andy. ‘When we were confident enough we put on a few

gigs and it was during one of our gigs that we met Dave who became our manager.

We played him a couple of songs and he really liked them and decided to work with us. From there we worked really hard perfecting our live show and it was during one of the live shows that we were picked up by the record label.’

Before their big break the band were all working hard at other professions including teaching special needs children, plastering and labouring using their spare time to head down to their local music venue The Square to watch the likes of Biffy Clyro and Muse. ‘There isn’t a very big music scene in Harlow so when big bands did play there I’d watch them and think, ‘I want that to be me,’’ says Steve.

When they weren’t watching or making music Morning Parade were out partying, hard. Hence the name. Morning Parade, they tell me, came from the gangs of people who fall out of bars and clubs at 5am. ‘It’s something we always used to say, ‘I’m just off to join the morning parade boys’,’ says Steve. It’s their partying ways that have inspired the majority of their songs to date with them singing about nights out, girls and hangovers making them one of the most relatable bands for their target audience since the Arctic Monkeys sang about getting trashed up North. Since they’ve been signed the band have gone on to support Feeder during the Bristol and London leg of their tour and in November they released three limited edition 7” vinyl’s, Under The Stars (the verse of which was written during New

Years Eve 2009 and was also the first song they recorded for EMI), Your Majesty and In the Name. The vinyl’s also included live versions of the songs, something they say is their main strength.

‘I think our live show is as good, if not better, as our recorded music,’ says Steve.

‘The live recordings are a pure warts and all, honest representation of what we sound like live. If we record a song and we can’t imagine singing it live then we scrap it, it’s all about the live element for us.’ says Steve.

Inevitably Morning Parade are being compared to a fair few of their musical peers with one recent review likening them to everyone from Coldplay to Delphic and Stereophonics. Not that the boys are too worried, ‘What makes us different from all those people is where we can go with our music. We have more freedom going forward because the core of our music is classic song writing. Rather than working with computers and synthesisers like a lot of bands, we work from an acoustic upwards adding the melodies once the song writing is the best it can be. If the first album goes well we can potentially move in to the dance music world or the rock world or the atmospheric song genre,’ explains Chad.

‘For that reason alone I think there’s a lot of future for us as a band.’

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film: words: Mark Williams

Glen Gould

BOOK TO FILM CONVERSIONS. IS THE FILM EVER AS GOOD AS THE BOOK? THIS IS SOMETHING I WAS THINKING ABOUT RECENTLY, WHEN DUE TO ILLNESS I WAS WRAPPED IN A SLEEPING BAG ON MY SOFA RE-WATCHING THE LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY. IT’S NO WONDER I HAD SOME STRANGE DREAMS AFTER WATCHING ALL THREE EXTENDED, FOUR-HOUR LONG EPISODES WITHIN THE SPACE OF A COUPLE OF DAYS. BUT I’VE ALWAYS FOUND FILM TRILOGIES TO BE A GOOD RECOVERY AID WHEN SUFFERING FROM A BOUT OF MAN-FLU. ANYWAY, I DIGRESS...

Glen Gould

Lord of The Rings has to be one of the best examples of a faithful and quite simply stunning book-to-film adaptation.

Even with the extended versions, there’s a lot they had to cut from the books, but the films still feel like the complete article, an epic accompaniment to an epic book. Many LOTR nerds, (ahem) fans, may have complained about the loss of the character Tom Bombadil, but with a story of that size, some things simply have to go.

The Harry Potter films though, have, arguably, not quite managed to grab the imagination in the same way that the books did. The films are fun, and visually very impressive in their rendering of Hogwarts, but they just fall a bit short somehow. But children’s books can be a tricky customer to turn into a successful movie; just ask the makers of the disastrously bad The Golden Compass. When provided with such glorious material in the form of the His Dark Materials trilogy, it is surprising that they made such a cock-up of the Golden Compass that it wrote off any possibility of the second and third books being made into films any time soon. If one of the only highlights of a film is a talking bear, voiced by Ian McKellen, bellowing ‘You wish to ride me?’ (snigger), then something has gone wrong.

Finishing on a good example though, Mario Puzo, writer of The Godfather could have few complaints about the rendition of his tale into one of cinemas all-time great masterpieces. Despite the overall machismo and chauvinism inherent in the film, it is actually toned down a fair bit from the book, which can only have helped its widespread appeal, massive worldwide success and critical acclaim.

So, it would seem that the film can be as good as the book, but then again, when someone really loves a particular book, it is very difficult to do complete justice to the imagined version they have stored in their head. Which in no way provides any kind of answer to the question ‘is the film ever as good as the book?’ but then no answer was promised.

Let’s have a look at films out in January and a couple of intriguing film festivals shall we?

First up is the documentary Gasland (14th Jan) from Dogwoof films, who are often at the forefront of important social and environmental issue-based documentaries. Gasland follows filmmaker Josh Fox, as he takes a trip around America to discover the effects of Hydraulic fracturing on the environment, a process used to extract natural gas from the earth. The problem being that the companies using it often don’t seem too bothered about the lasting effects on the

Biutiful

surrounding areas. Like contamination of water supplies, to the point that gas is coming out of people’s taps, rather than water. Very flammable gas. www.gaslandthemovie.com The Green Hornet (14th Jan) is directed

by Michel Gondry, which along with being written by it’s principal actor Seth Rogen, makes it a much more interesting prospect than a good many superhero films. As you would expect from Gondry, it is a stylish comic adaptation, the story of a rich heir who wants to use his new-found wealth to fight crime but has decided the best way to get to the criminals is to pretend to be one of them. The arch-villain, Chudnofsky, is played by Christoph Waltz, in his first role since the dastardly Nazi Colnel Hans Landa in Inglorious Basterds. www.greenhornetmovie.com The Cohen Brothers already have a back-catalogue of remarkable films, from the Big Lebowski to Fargo and No Country for Old Men. True Grit (14th Jan) looks like another excellent addition to the list. Set in the old American ‘Wild’ West, Marshal Reuben J. ‘Rooster’ Cogburn (Jeff Bridges) is persuaded by a 14 year old girl called Mattie Ross to track down the killer of her father. He enlists the help of a Texas sheriff named La Boeuf (Matt Damon) and off they go on their man-hunt. The story is told from the perspective of the girl, and is said to stick more closely to the book than the 1969 adaptation starring John Wayne. www.truegritmovie.com

Gas Land

True Grit

Neds

Black Swan (21st Jan) centres around a professional ballerina played by Natalie Portman, whose position as the top candidate for the starring role in an upcoming production of Swan Lake is threatened by the talents of a rival. Darren Aranofsky directs and the brilliant French actor Vincent Cassell plays the somewhat over-friendly dance teacher. www.foxsearchlight.com/blackswan A documentary about a pianist may require much careful pronunciation of the word ‘pianist’ but let’s not cheapen the appeal of Genius Within: The Inner Life of Glenn Gould (21st Jan). For anyone who is an admirer of the work of Glenn Gould, this promises to be a fascinating insight into the life of genius tinged with a dash of madness and a healthy dollop of eccentricity. glenngouldmovie.com NEDS (21st Jan), which stands for Non-Educated Delinquents is a Scottish film set in 1970s Glasgow. All the press for it so far seems to use the phrase ‘coming-of-age drama’, so who are we to buck such a trend? Our protagonist John McGill is a very bright young boy who excels academically but faces a lot of bullying from his class-mates for doing so. He also lives in the shadow of his older brother who’s a well known member of one of the local gangs, and as such finds it difficult to convince people that he and his older sibling could not be farther apart. It has already won awards at film festivals such as San Sebastian,

and looks like a powerful, compelling tale that will appeal to fans of This Is England and Trainspotting.

Iñárritu rarely delivers anything that isn’t fantastic, so let’s label this a ‘must-see’.

57 www.biutiful-themovie.com

Lastly, but not leastly this month, there is Biutiful (28th Jan), a Mexican film directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu (Amores Perros and Babel) and starring Javier Bardem. Bardem plays a loving father whose main means of income ranges from the nefarious to the shady, but it is all he knows and so must reconcile his need to be a good father and raise his children well with his entanglement in the underworld crime of Barcelona. Javier Bardem’s performance in Biutiful has generally been described as immense and Alejandro González

Also well worth a mention is the Barbican Silent film and Live Music Series (From Jan 1st onwards) which is showing some classic silent movies accompanied by an assortment of live music. First up is Dreams of Darkness and Colour, with piano accompaniment by Lilly Henley. www.barbican.org.uk/film/festivals.asp.

Add to that, the London Short Film Festival (7th – 16th Jan), which in 2010 held 42 events across 10 days and 10 venues (check website for details of the 2011 program), and your film needs in January are well and truly taken care of.

2011.shortfilms.org.uk.

DVD Roundup

The Girl Who Played With Fire (10th Jan) Final installment of the Stieg Larsson, Millenium Trilogy, drawing to a close the story of Lisbeth Salander and a shady, powerful organisation that would rather see her gone.

The Secret in Their Eyes (10th Jan) Multiple award-winning, Argentinian crime thriller.

Gainsbourg (10th Jan) Most men would die happy if they could be even a fraction as cool as Serge Gainsbourg. Excellent biopic.

I’m Still Here (10th Jan) Had Joaquin Pheonix really gone mental, grown a massive beard and started ranting on chat-shows or was it all a ruse for I’m Still Here?

Mr Nice (31st Jan) Biopic of Howard Marks, once one of the world’s most wanted marijuana traffickers, and a thoroughly nice bloke who we interviewed back in October’s issue of Who’s Jack.

WHY ISN’T IT THE FUTURE YET? THE YEAR IS NOW 2011. SOUNDS QUITE FUTURISTIC DOESN’T IT? IT’S THE KIND OF YEAR THAT A 1960s SCI-FI B-MOVIE WOULD BE SET IN, AS ALIENS INVADED, BUT DIDN’T RECKON ON THE SHEER WILL AND DETERMINATION OF ONE DEBONAIR, SQUARE-JAWED HERO. THE KIND OF YEAR BY WHICH WE SHOULD HAVE BECOME A HAIRLESS RACE OF TELEPATHIC BEINGS WHO NO LONGER HAVE ANY USE FOR PRIMITIVE CUSTOMS SUCH AS EATING SOLID FOODS, NOW THAT ALL OUR NUTRITIONAL REQUIREMENTS COME FROM ONE SHINY RED PILL. words : Mark Williams

Yet we still have to do a multitude of daily, mundane tasks that tiny silver gadgets should be doing for us. We tie our own shoelaces, brush our own teeth and walk, not hover, not teleport, nor beam, but bloody well walk from place to place!

Ok, so if you change from one tube line to another at Kings Cross you can travel on the moving walkways, but those things have been around for ages, and old people still manage to get in the way on them.

Back to the Future: Part 2 (1989) Year: 2015

It’s high time that it started to feel like the future! Start beaming reality television straight into my brain. Project giant adverts onto the moon with the most powerful laser ever built. And let’s all wear silver jumpsuits and moon-boots to work. Not that work should exist any more. We should have figured out some sort of new global super-economics that allows everyone to do whatever the hell they like. Like sitting on the sofa all day in your pants, watching DVD box-sets. Hmm, maybe it doesn’t need to be the future to do that...

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) Year: 2001

Sofas and pants aside, there are a lot of films set at a time in ‘the future’ which has now become the present, or really isn’t all that far off. The future bit of Back to The Future, for example, is merely 2015! And are we anywhere near having hover-boards yet? I think not. So let’s have a look at some films set in the future and decide whether the future should hurry up and happen or stay exactly where it is.

Pros: Self drying clothes, self-tying shoe laces, cars powered on rubbish and, of course, hoverboards!

Cons: Biff Tannen is one of the most rich and powerful men on the planet, ‘What are you lookin at, Butthead?’ And there’s a not-very-good sequel still to come…

Pros: Deep space travel and exploration for the benefit and greater knowledge of the human race.

Cons: A psychotic computer called HAL, who’s gone a bit wrong and wants to kill humans.

1984 (Book: 1949, Film: 1984) Year: Yep, you guessed it, 1984 Pros: If extreme socialism is your thing then George Orwell may have envisioned your perfect world.

Cons: A totalitarian regime determined to control every aspect of human life through coercion, force and Newspeak.

Luckily, 1984 has long since passed, and while most who lived through the Thatcher years will tell you things could have been better, they weren’t quite the full-on Orwellian dystopia.

The Road (Book: 2006, Film: 2009) Year: 2019 Pros: There really aren’t too many to speak of.

Overcrowding isn’t really a problem any more as most people are dead.

Cons: Long desolate winters in an apocalyptic wasteland that is being patrolled by

gangs looking for survivors. So they can eat them. Well, at least this one isn’t supposed to happen for another eight years…

Akira (1988) Year: 2019 Pros: Wrinkly psychic children could be entertaining.

Cons: Tokyo was destroyed by a nuclear explosion that led to World War 3.

The Running Man (Book: 1982, Film: 1987) Year: 2017 Pros: Reality TV is finally worth watching as violent criminals are forced to participate in a show that’s a bit like Gladiators with the exception that the Gladiators want to kill you. Even Wolf just pretended he wanted to kill the contestants.

Cons: Ben Richards (Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character) is wrongly accused of a crime he didn’t commit. As a result he ends up being chased around The Running Man game-show by a psychopath with a chainsaw, among others. Of course he vanquishes them all, this is Arnie, but still, it seems a bit unfair to mere mortals.

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A Clockwork Orange (Book: 1962, Film: 1971) Year: 1995 Pros: Milk bars which serve milk mixed with a variety of suspicious substances sounds like something a bit different on a Friday night.

Cons: Gangs of droogs who like nothing better than some Ludwig Van Beethoven and a bit of the old ultraviolence.

A Scanner Darkly (Book: 1977, Film: 2006) Year: 2013

Rollerball (1975) Year: 2018 Pros: Dangerous and violent deathsports, Yay! The fact that The Running Man was set in 2017 and Rollerball in 2018 indicates that we aren’t far off from a more brutal breed of sports now. Perhaps, as a kind of ‘out with the old, in with the new’ gesture, Wayne Rooney could be one of the first contestants?

Cons: The strong possibility of death by taking part in a sport is bound to be a hindrance to its popularity.

X-Men (2000) Year: 2010 Pros: You could end up with a really cool mutation like Storm who can control the weather. Having a summer BBQ but worried about the rain? Not if you’re Storm.

Cons: A highly segregated society and struggle for mutant acceptance that closely resembles the American Civil Rights Movement.

Pros: You get to have a lot of (seemingly) deep and meaningful conversations with Robert Downey Jr and Woody Harrelson. That’s got to be fun.

Cons: Widespread drug addiction and constant police surveillance of civilians to catch those using ‘Substance D’.

Blade Runner (Book: 1962, Film: 1982) Year: 2019 Pros: Some major advances in biomechanics have given us androids that look like Daryl Hannah.

Cons: The future seems to consist of a fairly grim and sleazy dystopia for the majority of us. Imagine a more futuristic Soho at 1am on a Saturday night but everywhere is like that, all the time.

Reign of Fire (2002) Year: 2020 Pros: Everyone seems to be absolutely ripped, due to a strict daily regime of running from or fighting fire breathing dragons.

Cons: The dragons that have been sleeping under England have woken up and gone mental. Luckily, this one coming true seems more unlikely than the others as there are more holes in the plot of this film than a Swiss cheese.

RoboCop (1987) Year: 2015 Pros: Swift robot justice and retribution for wrongdoers and ne’er-do-wells.

Cons: Big shady corporations with big shady ulterior motives, wishing to serve only their big shady executives and shareholders.

So, in conclusion it seems that most future films seem fairly apocalyptic affairs, set in a grimy dystopia full of the downtrodden and overcrowded masses.

Maybe we should just be happy with what we’ve got. But then, there’s no guarantee that things will all go wrong is there? It’s not like we’re in the middle of a global economic crisis, coupled with rising sea levels caused by melting polar ice-caps due to our own folly as a species.

Actually, thinking about those rising sea levels, if we look really far into the future, we could be living in Waterworld, riding around in rusty boats, avoiding pirates on jet-skis. That would probably be quite entertaining...

This is Vicky McClure

words: Laura Hills photographs: Christopher George Sims all make-up provided by: Illamasqua www.illamasqua.com stylist : Sara Darling stylist’s assistant : Hermione Russell hair : La Lah using L’Oreal and Schwarzkopf make up artist : Solo James using Illamasqua make up assistant : Hannah Khan

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For many of us 27-year-old Northern actress Vicky McClure will be best known for playing the role of Lol in the Shade Meadow’s directed film, This is England and it’s television spin-off series, This is England ’86. But that isn’t the only string to her acting bow. Vicky has also starred in several other films including Madonna’s first directing effort, Filth and Wisdom, TV dramas like Five Daughters which followed the final days of the sex workers who were murdered in Ipswich in 2006 and music videos for Plan B. Yet This is England remains her biggest role to date with the film going on to win a BAFTA and the TV series being viewed by an average of 2million people per episode in the UK. The transition of the This is England franchise from film to TV saw Vicky’s character taking on an even bigger part in a storyline which saw Lol ending the series by killing her rapist father. We met up with her on one of her rare days in London, to find out a bit more about how it feels to be part of the show’s success, partying with Madonna and how she prepared to play some of the hardest scenes of her acting career to date...

So tell us Vicky, how did you first realise you wanted to be an actress?

I started out acting when I was 11 years old when I attended the Central Television Workshop in Nottingham. I ended up staying there for 10 years. I studied alongside a lot of great actors and actresses, people like Samantha Morton and some of the other guys from This is England. The biggest lesson I learnt while I was there was confidence and the ability to improvise as both things have been key to the things that I’ve done with Shane Meadows because that’s how he likes to work. It made me confident in my own imagination and able to take risks.

Growing up I have always been very dramatic. I’ve danced for most of my life and I was always told that I have a great face and a very expressive smile and I knew I wanted to perform. At first I wasn’t sure if that would be through dance or drama and then eventually I found my niche. My mum would probably say she knew I was going to be an actress from birth though.

Do you think that people are born with a natural talent to act or do you think it’s something you have to learn?

I think it’s a bit of both. There are certain things you need training for like Shakespeare which isn’t easy because it can’t be improvised so you have to train to a certain degree. Then there’s people like Thomas Turgoose who plays Shaun in This is England who was picked up from the street and genuinely has a natural talent for acting. For me I’ve achieved a lot by trying to learn things for myself and also from going with my instincts. I’ve learnt a lot from Johnny Harris who played my Dad in the series too. He has been the most inspirational actor I’ve ever worked with to date, he’s just incredible. I’ve never been around anyone like that before, where they are so engrossed in what they’re doing.

Everything from his focus to his concentration was an inspiration to me.

worked with Shane Meadows who was directing it but I didn’t think that I would get the part. The role I was auditioning for was for a girl who was meant to be a lot older than I was and I thought that might work against me. Also the guy whose sister I was auditioning to play actually had his real sister auditioning for the role so I thought she had it in the bag so I was really pleased when I got it. On the film I was working with people who were quite a bit older than me but I’ve always been a bit older than my years so it wasn’t too bad, despite the fact I was one of the only people who had to have an on-set tutor.

You’ve also worked with Madonna when she directed the film, Filth and Wisdom in which you played one of the leading roles. What was she like to work with?

How I got this role was pretty random actually. I had just left my agent at the time so I had no one representing me and I got a call from someone I’d worked with to say that Madonna wanted to work with me. I thought it was a load of rubbish but the next day I got the script sent through and it all went from there. I didn’t even have to audition for the role as Madonna already knew that she wanted me to play the part. She’s a perfectionist when she’s directing, she’d chosen a subject which was close to her heart, the characters all had stories that resembled her life so I trusted in what she was doing. It was her first film and I think she did a really good job. Of course she managed to get great people working on it because of who she is so the costume was great and the camera work was amazing. We’ve kept in touch a bit, I went to her birthday in August but we don’t call each other every day. In fact, I don’t even have her number.

As an actress, how involved do you get to be with the filming process?

Imagination. You have to be able to believe you are a character for the audience to believe in it. That’s always my advice to aspiring actors. It’s not easy being an actor, you have to give yourself time to develop and to learn.

Whenever I’m working with Shane Meadows I get to be heavily involved. We talk through the script and develop the characters and he always wants his actors to put a lot of input in to the back story of the character they’re playing. After we finish filming he also gets us involved in things like editing and grading which is a massive honour because he knows what he’s doing already and probably doesn’t need our input. Having said that, it’s very much on a director by director basis.

How did you get your role in your first film, A Room For Romeo Brass?

How did Shane Meadows approach you to play the character of Lol?

I was 15 years-old when I auditioned for the film and it was the first time that I’d

We stayed friends after I shot A Room for Romeo Brass with him. One day we were

What is the one quality that people need to be a good actor?

in the pub and he was telling me about his plan to make This is England and he said that he wanted me to play Lol. He was talking me through the character which all sounded great until he mentioned that she’d be a skin head! I chose to ignore that part of the conversation but before I knew it I was in a chair having my hair shaved off and beginning filming.

What was it like working on This is England?

This is Enland and This is Enland 86 have a very special place in my heart because the gang on screen are also the gang off screen, we all get on so well. It’s a unique group of people and I love every member of the cast and crew so I feel very privileged to have worked on it especially as it’s done so well. There will be nothing that will ever compare to it for me as it’s a completely different experience to anything else I’ve ever been a part of. It was my baby, I love playing Lol, I could never pass her off to anyone else because I want to be the only person to ever play her.

This is England had great success and even won a BAFTA. What do you think the appeal was?

When we made it we knew it was special but we didn’t expect it to get the reaction it got. The reason it was called This is England and not This Was England is because all the stuff that happened in the 80s still happens today so kids can relate to it and people that were around in the 80s can sit back and reminisce. I think people liked it so much because everyone can take something from it, it’s the same with the TV show as well. The story lines are very dark but I’ve had people come to me and say they’ve been in similar situations and said that to some degree the show helped them which I think is great.

You played a much bigger role in This is England 86 and had to deal with a lot of serious themes. What was it like acting those more serious scenarios?

It’s difficult because I’ve personally never experienced anything like what Lol and her family were going through but we tried to deal with it in a very sensitive manner. As Shane always says, the sentence that people like that (Lol’s father in the film and TV series who rapes her and others played by Johnny Harris) get just isn’t enough and we wanted to highlight that. We tried to show the storyline in a real light, not just in a scene down an alley way with girls dressed provocatively.

First image : Three piece suit and brogues- Aaron Ray Dowie : www.aaronraydowie.com / image left : Jacket (part of suit) – Nancy Van Ostren : www.nancyvanostren.com

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‘I

will never tell anyone how Johnny and I prepared for those last scenes as that’s just between us.’

The fact that it felt so real meant that the story really got to people and caught people up in it. It’s made people pay attention which was always the aim.

How did you prepare for the final scenes?

I didn’t speak to anyone who had been in a similar situation or anything like that but I was very aware as to how they must feel. I have a nephew and the thought of something like that happening to him was enough to give me thoughts and feelings of massive anger. I will never tell anyone how Johnny and I prepared for those last scenes as that’s just between us but I will say that we worked really hard to get everything perfect. If we tried something and it didn’t work we’d strip it all down and start over again until we felt like we were doing the storyline justice and I think that’s why it turned out so well.

How did your family react to seeing you playing those scenes? Was it difficult for them to watch?

When the first episode went out I had a bit of a gathering to watch it with my family and friends and my mum told everyone if they were in the lounge then they weren’t allowed to talk while it was on. The first time I came on screen everyone screamed but I had to keep going in and out of the living room as I don’t find it easy watching myself back. There were some scenes which were difficult for my parents to watch, not because I’m topless but because of the distress of Lol’s character. They look at Lol and they see me whereas to everyone else she’s just a character so naturally there were parts which were tough for them to watch.

What was the transition between film and TV like?

It actually made no difference to me. I’m really glad we got to do a TV series as we got to get more footage out to people and in to people’s homes. In many ways I think that TV can be a bit more personal as it’s straight in to everyone’s living room so more people will watch it. The actual filming felt no different though. We even had the same crew that we used on the film. It was so nice to be able to put something like This is England on to TV.

Were there any difficulties getting any of the actors back to film a television series?

Not at all, everyone was straight on the bandwagon. There was no way any of us would turn it down, we were all more than ready for it.

How similar would you say you are to Lol? We are a little bit similar. Shane obviously picked me because he thought I had something in common with Lol which meant I could play her. I think I was more like Lol in the film than in the TV show as I haven’t had the life or the upbringing that she’s had. We have similar traits though, I’m not as hard as her but I do have an edge.

Brit flicks notoriously have a tough time, what do you think makes a successful British film?

It’s all about the characters. The audience has to be able to believe them. Without that element it doesn’t matter when or how it’s set as it just won’t work.

as Lol was then that would be great too.

I’ve never played a sweet girlie role but then again I have a manly look apparently so I’m not sure that I ever will.

You also star in Plan B’s videos as his alter ego, Strictland Banks’, girlfriend.

What’s that like?

Myself and Ben (Plan B) do a lot of improvisation together before we shoot the videos. The album, The Defamation of Strictland Banks, is a story so it’s about building that relationship between Strictland and his girlfriend throughout the videos. It’s loads of fun, I really enjoy doing them. We started working together because he’d seen This is England and decided that he wanted me to be in his videos and got in touch. We actually have a few ideas for other ways we can work together too so we’ll see what happens. He just directed a film which I was meant to work on but our dates didn’t fit with each other so I wasn’t able to do it unfortunately.

You’re also the face of make-up brand Illamasqua, tell us a bit about that?

There’s definitely more hype around me now. I don’t like to say anything about projects I’ve been offered until they actually happen because there’s always a lot of talk and a lot of hype and it doesn’t always come through. If I believed all the hype it would crush me when it didn’t happen. It’s a difficult industry because everyone’s got lots of ideas about things they want to write and direct and while I’m always up for doing them there are other factors that can get in the way like financing. You soon develop a thick skin otherwise it’d be too hard.

I’m known as the muse for the brand which basically means I’m the face of the brand. It’s a massive honour to be involved at such a high level with them as I believe in a lot of what they stand for.

Illamasqua work closely with the Sophie Lancaster Foundation which is a charity that was set up after a girl called Sophie 65 and her boyfriend were attacked by a group of youths for being Goths. Sophie was beaten to death in what was essentially a hate crime and all because of the way she looked. The great thing about Illmasqua is that they concentrate on telling people to express themselves however they want to. They encourage people to be their alter ego and to not be afraid of what other people think and I love that.

What other roles would you like to play that you haven’t already?

Lastly, what does the future hold for Vicky McClure?

I’d love to act in a period drama. I like the way the characters hold themselves and the way they talk. It’s very attractive to me as an actress to play something different like that. If other characters were to come up that are as hard to play

I don’t have any plans to go off to Hollywood or anything like that just yet but there are a couple of potentially exciting things coming up this year. I don’t want to say until I know they’re definitely going ahead though as I don’t want to jinx it.

Have you noticed that there has been more of an interest in you as an actress since you played Lol?

Trousers- Ivana Helsinki : www.ivanahelsinki.com/ shirt- Jaeger : www.jaeger.co.uk / shoes- Beatrix Ong : www.beatrixong.com / watch- vintage Rolex : www.rolex.com / overleaf : Camel coat- Jaeger / belt- Paul & Joe : www.paulandjoe.com / fishnet tights- Tights Please : www.tightsplease.co.uk / sunglasses- Cutler & Gross : www.cutlerandgross.com / ring- Stylists own /

Black Swan :

Ballerinas do bite words : Katerina Pantelides On General Release on January 21st, Darren Aaronofsky’s Black Swan starring Natalie Portman as Nina Sayers, a quietly obsessive ballerina who goes to unthinkable lengths to realise her dream of dancing the coveted Swan Queen role in Swan Lake is one of the most hotly anticipated films of 2011. After jumping through hoops for tickets to the British premiere of the film in late October and then spending two hours before the screen part thrilled with amazement and part reviling with disgust, I can honestly say that Black Swan was an intense experience. Be warned and take the ‘Black’ in the title into consideration, this film is a million miles away from a twinkly sugar plum fairy fest.

As far as ballet movies go Black Swan begins predictably enough. Nina Sayers is a diligent but overlooked member of the corps de ballet at New York City Ballet, who dreams of dancing the double role of Odette/Odile in Swan Lake.

When the company’s prima ballerina Beth Macintyre played by Winona Ryder is coerced into retirement (and as a result goes stark-raving mad) leaving the role of Swan Queen vacant, it seems that Nina has a chance at stardom. But alas, Mila Kounis’s seductive Lily whirls in and impresses the company’s libidinous director Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) to the extent that she threatens to rob Nina of her dream role. Nina is told that while she has the delicacy and clean technique to play Odette, the White Swan, Lily possesses the sensuality and unpredictability of Odile, the Black Swan.

After an encounter with Nina in his office where she comes to beg him for the part, Leroy decides that she has enough bite (literally) to play the Black Swan. This doesn’t however stop Lily from haunting Nina’s progress every step of the way, and with pressure to embrace the dark side and become the ravishing Black Swan, Nina becomes fatally embroiled

with Lily.

Both dark-haired and petite (though Kounis is swarthier and more buxom than Portman) the two become alternate sides of the same coin, and never more so than in a sex scene, where Lily fertilises Nina with her demonic nature. Thereafter, Nina can only think as the Black Swan and we witness her rapid mental breakdown as fantasy and reality merge.

Now, the relationship between Nina and Lily (or more accurately between Portman and Kounis) along with the girl-on-girl action in the sex scene isn’t – as most critics claim- the highlight of the film. Though the film’s special effects and plot do much to convince us that Lily is evil, shallow and irritating as Mila Kounis’s portrayal of her is, it’s difficult to believe that she could ever be more compelling than the radiant Portman.

Moreover, a stereotypical femme fatale, she looks like she would be more at home in a catsuit than a leotard, and barely performs a dance step, whereas Portman’s Nina is constantly viewed in practice. Though natural charisma definitely plays a role in the ballerina’s stage appeal, anyone even remotely familiar with Swan Lake knows that Odile’s technical mastery is imperative to her characterisation. Lily’s supposed threat to Nina’s career is therefore unconvincing.

Much more interesting is Nina’s mother Erica, expertly played by Barbara Hershey, who for me was one of the most terrifying on-screen incarnations that I have ever witnessed. Terming Nina her ‘sweet girl’ in dulcet tones, this ex corps-de-ballet member imprisons her daughter in an eternal childhood (Nina’s pink room is filled to the brim with stuffed toys) and attempts to control her life at every turn. A terrifying mutation on the pushy ‘ballet mother’, she forcibly inspects Nina’s body for signs of self-harm and insists on cutting her nails down until they bleed. Never having gained the role

of the Swan Queen herself, she seems embittered by her daughter’s success, and arguably proves as great an obstacle to Nina as Kounis’s lacklustre Lily.

In a film where the protagonists communicate chiefly through their bodies, the costumes and special effects play an important role in showing the two faces of ballet. Glimpses of ethereal tutus and tiaras designed by Rodarte are juxtaposed with shots of feet maimed by pointe shoes or razor sharp black feathers sprouting through the surface of the skin.

Aaronofsky’s decision to film the dancers on stage rather than from the wings or the audience, (as is common to most on-screen representations of dance), means that we truly witness the gale-force strength behind every pirouette. The mirror – an important part of a dancer’s daily process of self-correction is expertly used, as realism and pure horror collide. His penetration of ballet’s image of effortless guile is certainly impressive, as is the cast’s undertaking of professional training and restricted diet to attain the necessary technique and physique for the role. Portman, in particular is every inch the ballerina - an astounding physical actress, she exhibits serene grace in performance and the haunting of demons bodily and mental in repose.

However, despite peeling back ballet’s luminous screen paint, Black Swan is definitely more fairy tale than documentary. The ending in particular – which I won’t spoil for those yet to see the film- recalls not only that of Swan Lake, but previous ballet films like The Red Shoes (1948). Like many of its predecessors, Black Swan shows 67 ballerinas as slaves to their art, as puppets whose strings are pulled by an artistic director’s baton. Ironically, even the impetus behind Nina’s spectacular rebellion is Leroy’s demand that she should ‘seduce us!’ if she is to be crowned as Swan Queen. While this suits the film’s purpose and produces the remarkably condensed structure appropriate to a thriller, it does little to challenge the clichés inherent in the ballet film genre.

Its representation of ballet as a harsh, life-altering vocation resonates, but its portrayal of ballerinas as psycho pawns to a director’s whim is a trifle old-fashioned and demeaning. Though in Diaghilev’s era there were cases of ballerinas identifying with their characters to an almost schizophrenic level (the legendary Olga Spessitstseva appropriated the character Giselle’s madness and expected the nurses in her mental institution to pay court to her as the Swan Queen), most modern ballerinas are conscious, experimental artists who view their career as a progression instead of shaping it around a particular role.

Still, perhaps we should look for a dose more reality in the British director Chris Payne’s film Love Tomorrow, which focuses on a dancer’s survival of career-altering injury and is released later in 2011, and enjoy Black Swan for what it is: a (mostly) superbly acted, bone-chilling portrait of obsession.

R E T T O P S T AR

THE RIFLEMAKER words : Eleanor Davidson

So it’s finally the New Year, why not visit a new gallery. Well, I say new, it actually opened seven years ago, but I hadn’t heard of it’s exhistance until now.

Tucked away near the end of Beak Street, The Riflemaker is one of those places you walk past about five times and begin to wonder if this is some kind of art equivalent of Diagon Alley, and bad luck, you’re no wizard! (Sorry, but Harry Potter is still fresh on the brain.) Either that, or you’ve been given dodgy directions. So after much perseverance I finally find the door of the gun makers turned gallery and hit hurdle number two: it won’t open, I rattle the door knob around a good few times, probably looking a bit ‘special’ before I’m let in by one of the staff. What is this place? A very well disguised massage parlour by appointment only?

Crikey. Feeling slightly wary, I head down gloomy, downright, dodgy stairs that look a bit rapey, not helped by the seedy, sexy-time music blaring from the basement. Feeling slightly concerned by what I’ll find down there, I just hope it doesn’t involve whips and/or chains.

BUT, as luck would have it, I’m met by an LED multi-coloured flashing bonanza!!!

The computational light installation has been created by Zegelbaum and Coelho, this year’s winners of the Design Miami/

Basel Designers of the Future award.

Being a prime example of a technical retard, the words ‘computer’ and ‘installation’ are normally a swift turn-off, but I was nicely surprised here.

Imagine a collection of rainbow-coloured magnetic cubes that can be poked, prodded and twirled to your heart’s content. The fun doesn’t stop there, as they also change colour during said poking, prodding and twirling, with the electro-signally somethings coursing through your fingertips so that each cube can take on the colour of its neighbour. It’s like playing God. Apparently, each cube works as an individual pixel, yet here, instead of the pixels arranging themselves in to a given formation, as you’d expect on a television screen, you have the power to move them yourselves! Mind Blowing.

The concept stems from aiming to create a form of technology that works around us, as opposed to adapting our brain to work around the technology, at the same time doing so in a playful, exciting experience. This it certainly does, as even I managed to emerge without having broken anything, and with a smile on my face. I found it refreshing, free from the usual six page essay you might expect at a contemporary art exhibition that was required, and indeed necessary, to justify the time and effort you’ve made to come and visit a brick wrapped in tin foil.

Instead, it was fun, interactive and made me look at technology in a new way, ie.

Without horror.

Other than Zegelbaum and Coelho’s installation, which is running until 31st March, the Riflemaker will be exhibiting Analog: Trends in Sound and Picture from 11th January to 5th March. This looks primarily at the receding and, in some cases growing use of analogous production in photography, television and music. The backbone of the exhibition is the archive of Richard Nicholson who in 2007 began shooting images of the 204 professional darkrooms in London that still used the traditional method of photography and development. When he finished the project in 2010, only 4 remained. This seems an interesting statistic considering the amount of try-hard amateur photographers you see perched along Waterloo Bridge. But then maybe they just get their photos onto their hard drives and then onto Facebook. With both of these exhibitions running through January and beyond, it’s worth taking the plunge and braving this seemingly suspect gallery.

So why not make your New Year’s resolution to visit a different exhibition every month?... Or every week, if you’ve got a lot of time on your hands. You too, could discover a whole host of diddy art galleries in unassuming places.

Just make sure you take some pepper spray.

Whilst everybody else has been sleeping over the holidays, enjoying skiing, or whatever it is people do this time of year, the art world has been a busy little bee. An array of SPLENDID EVENTS has been lined up for you all - if you know where to look, that is. Jack has compiled a quick calendar of London essentials for your diary, from blockbusters to not-really-exhibitions - outline these in whatever fancy pen you have and top up your Oyster card: they’re not to be missed.

Jan Feb Mar Apr May June Jul Aug Sept Oct Nov Dec

THE ART CALENDAR 2011

by Donna Marie Howard

69

JAN Diana Thater: Chernobyl at Hauser & Wirth, Piccadilly 28th January - 5th March 2011 Thater floods Hauser’s Piccadilly gallery with visions of the post-nuclear landscape of Chernobyl, the Ukranian nuclear plant whose catastrophic disaster registered as the sole Level 7 on the scale of International Nuclear Events. Thater examines Chernobyl’s 100-mile wide radioactive territory - the so-called ‘Zone of Alienation’ - but humanises the installation by focusing on the once near-extinct Przewalski’s Horse. A striking look at wilderness in the absence of man. www.hauserwirth.com

DON’T MISS Gabriel Orozco at Tate Modern, Bankside 19th Jan - 25th April 2011 An exotic new year outing for the Tate Modern, with this vibrant exhibition of Mexican artist Gabriel Orozco. Look out for a Citroen sandwich, a billiards table with a twist, and a chess board that would give Harry Potter’s Wizard’s Chess a run for its Galleons. www.tate.org.uk/modern

JUL Afghanistan: Crossroads of the Ancient World at the British Museum, Holborn 3rd March - 3rd July 2011 An intriguing exhibition, this one, comprising a vast array of exquisite golden artefacts that at one time were the stuff of legend. Thought to have been forever lost in the black market after smuggling from the national museum in Kabul, the treasure actually survived hidden in a number of plastic bags, in boxes in a national bank. 200 of these precious finds will go on display, but don’t try to slip a bracelet in your pocket: I’ve an inkling security will be particularly tight on this one. www.britishmuseum.org

Crown, gold crown from Tillya Tepe Crown (Tillya Tepe, Tomb VI), 1st century BC-1st century AD, gold and imitation turquoise, National Museum of Afghanistan © Thierry Ollivier / Musée Guimet, courtesy of the British Museum

FEB

MAR

Conference - ‘The Granddaughters’ Generation: Feminism and Art History Now’ (the work of Linda Nochlin and its legacies) at UCL, Gower Street

5th February 2011

For those of you who have ever considered the patriarchal bias of art history, this one-day conference is for you. With Linda Nochlin as a guest speaker, this important discussion will both introduce the idea of a feminist art history to a new audience, and call upon all to consider the impact of Nochlin’s pivotal question ‘Why Have There Been No Great Women Artists?‘ which she first posed in 1971. Providing a floor for a number of the most significant feminists, professors and art historians from across the country, Nochlin’s presence will definitely draw a crowd. www.ucl.ac.uk

Yohji Yamamoto at the V&A, South Kensington 12th March - 10th July 2011

DON’T MISS

Contemporary digital artist Rashid Rana is interesting as a male artist that critiques the negative cultural stereotyping of women. With work consisting of innumerable imagesalmost computerised collages- of the contemporary female, his comments on the porn industry, particular cultures, and a post 9/11 standing of the burqa, Rana’s creation of mass portraits from individual ones exposes the redundancy of the stereotype. www.lissongallery.com

Fred Wison at Karsten Schubert, Soho Opens February 23rd 2011 Wilson’s first solo exhibition in London is long overdue. An award-winning artist from America, Wilson employs the concept of the museum as his medium.

With works ranging from wall labels to lighting, and elevating ennui to extraordinary, Wilson deconstructs the curated culture. A thought-provoking and much-anticipated London debut. www.karstenschubert.com

AUG TRY There are a number of galleries in Cork Street, just off Piccadilly. The majority are contemporary art, and all are free to enter.

With a programme that is independent to each and every gallery, this dynamic art centre offers visitors the chance to see about 9 exhibitions in one fell swoop and still have enough time for a trip to Patisserie Valerie afterwards. From Bernard Jacobson to the Adam Gallery, Cork Street is endowned with some of the finest in contemporary art and is well worth taking a detour to visit. www.patisserie-valerie.co.uk

Yohji Yamamoto is one of the world’s most influential and enigmatic fashion designers, with this installation-based retrospective (which takes place 30 years after his Paris debut) will feature over 80 garments spanning the designer’s career.

Exploring the work of a man whose work has challenged, provoked and inspired the fashion world, this exhibition brings together some of his most fantastical imaginings. www.vam.ac.uk

DON’T MISS Rashid Rana at the Lisson Gallery, Bell Street 29th March - 7 May 2011

SEPT London Design Festival at over 150 different London venues 17th - 25th September 2010 With the majority of the festival’s events free to enter, this week-long collection of major international exhibitions, trade events, installations, and talks and seminars are interspersed with product launches, receptions, private views and parties. Presenting both a networking opportunity for anybody working within, or hoping to break into, the contemporary design industry. www.londondesignfestival.com

APR

MAY

JUN

TRY Miró at Tate Modern, Bankside 14th April - 11th September 2010 In this, the first major retrospective of the artist to be held in London for nearly 50 years, Surrealist artist Joan Miró’s work is shown to reflect the turblent political atmosphere in Europe, following both the Spanish Civil War and the build-up to World War Two. One of the most vivid and playful of the twentieth-century artists, this exhibition charts the Catalonian’s progress through more than 150 works, and the mood of Franco’s Spain. www.tate.org.uk/modern/

Dirt at the Wellcome Collection, Euston 24th March - 31st August 2011 Not strictly an art exhibition or a museum collection, the Wellcome Collection’s shows do, however, offer a generous amount when it comes to visual titillation. Take Dirt, for example: a six-city, and three-century wide study of the stuff our mothers always told us not to get on our clothes. Arching from the seventeenth century and also decades into the future, art helps the story along as the Wellcome stages another exhibition-cum-investigation. www.wellcomecollection.org

Toulouse-Lautrec and Jane Avril: Beyond the Moulin Rouge at The Courtauld Gallery, Strand (image below) 16th June - 18th September 2011 This exhibition reveals the world of Jane Avril: dancer, friend and muse to Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec, the French painter renowned for his intimate and spectacular images of the cabaret of eighteenth-century Paris. Avril is placed at centre stage in this, an exhibition of the type the Courtauld does best: rich, exciting and a little sexy, this show in the West Wing of Somerset House will no doubt justify precisely why its star was nicknamed ‘La Mélinite’, after a form of explosive. www.courtauld.ac.uk

DON’T MISS Summer Exhibition 2011 at The Royal Academy, Piccadilly 7th June - 15th August 2011

Joan Miró Carnival of Harlequin Print – 1924-1925

Ant eggs and maggots etc.

Wellcome Library, London

OCT Multiplied Art Fair at Christie’s, South Kensington With a date yet to be announced, Christie’s unveil Multiplied mark II, the sequel to the historic auction house’s first-ever fair which debuted in October 2010. Timed to coincide with its fancier contemporary cousin Frieze in Regent’s Park, Multiplied is free entry, and offers a range of actually fairly affordable prints.

Time will tell whether the £1 chipboards which were flying off the shelves will once again appear, but if not, fear not: this fair plays host to an interesting blend of both big names and quainter galleries. A quieter alternative to Frieze, this also opens the seemingly elusive world of Christie’s to all and sundry. You’re even allowed to bring your dog. How lovely. www.multipliedartfair.com

DON’T MISS The Unilever Series 2011 at Tate Modern, Bankside 11th October - 9th April 2012 Following the controversy of Ai Wei-Wei’s installation Sunflower Seeds last year, in which the Tate stopped visitors walking amongst the exhibit for health reasons, and the artist was placed under house arrest in China a month later, Tate Modern reveal their next Turbine Hall commission. www.tate.org.uk/modern

NOV Leonardo da Vinci: Painter at the Court of Milan at the National Gallery, Trafalgar Square 9th November 2011 - 5 February 2012 Boasting the ambitious tagline ‘This unprecedented exhibition – the first of its kind anywhere in the world – brings together sensational international loans never before seen in the UK’, this show at the National Gallery provides the most complete display of the artist’s rarest paintings, offering an insight into an artistic oeuvre otherwise overshadowed by helicopters and the Mona Lisa. www.nationalgallery.org.uk

One of the biggest summer draws in the London art year, the Summer Exhibition will once again return to the hallowed Burlington House. For those pondering, you can still enter: entry forms can be downloaded from the RA website and you have until March 15th to submit your work. www.royalacademy.org.uk

Jane Avril in the entrance to the Moulin Rouge, c.1892 Oil and pastel on cardboard, laid on panel, 102 x 55.1 cmCredit: The Courtauld Gallery, London

DEC Degas Dancers: Eye and Camera at the Royal Academy, Piccadilly Ending December 2011 Ending rather than starting in December, it is well worth catching this show before it closes. The Royal Academy takes a look at the career of Impressionist Edgar Degas and the stage as he perceived it.

Whilst this may seem a show that you’ve already seen, do not be fooled. The artist’s unavoidable popularity will have ensured his balletic compositions have been burned into your consciousness, but it would be folly to miss this opportunity to see them united. www.royalacademy.org.uk

71 71

Look at me now… words : Esme RIley

Matthew Havers Born 1988 a

New year, new you, and all that bullshit.

We’ve all said it: ‘This year, I’m going to give up chocolate/stop eating meat/take up knitting/do one scary thing every day.’ We all strive to ‘better’ ourselves, and it’s always at the beginning of the year, when the weather’s horrible and the post-Christmas blues are in full force.

But if we look back at ourselves, I think most of us will see that we’ve changed for the better – and I doubt it has anything to do with going teetotal/giving up cheese/taking up stamp collecting from January 1st 1980.

I’ve grabbed a few people and had a look back at their archives, to see how time has treated them, to take note of the eras ticking by, and to have a few laughs and coos at gorgeous old photos.

Oh, and because I’m nosey.

a

b

Brenda Jackson Born 1930

b c c

a: What a cute, smiley, happy

little 80s baby. ‘I weighed 11lb when I was born. This is one of those professional studio photos.’ What a cute, smiley, happy not so little baby, whose mother must’ve hated him. Ouch.

b: Matt and his funkily clad

d

family at Zoomarine Park in the Algarve. ‘Those are the best sunglasses I ever had. They folded at the bridge of your nose, so you could fit them in your pocket.’ Simple things.

c: Five years later, and it’s fair to say Matt’s

ballooned somewhat. He puts this down to comfort eating. ‘I had a teacher with a really vicious temper – I was terrified of him. He used to bite through his biros when he was angry. Couple this with a haunted house, and I was pretty much living in fear…so I ate. I had a secret stash in a Head bag next to my bed.’

Matt also kindly shares with me that he was so big, he had to roll onto his front to get up.

d: Now aged 22, Matt has left the nasty teacher

behind, ditched the junk food and found rugby…and a ridiculous quad bike he rides to and from the pub.

d

a

: A baby, Brenda keeps the sun off on Hunstanton beach.

b

: This fabulous photo of seven-year-old Brenda isn’t quite what it makes itself out to be. ‘This is actually a studio photo and the book’s a prop.’

c

: Kudos to 21-year-old Brenda for her nipped in waist, midi skirt and cute ballet pumps. Fifties chic.

e

d: It’s 1955, and Brenda is marrying John Sydney Appleton in an

extravagant pale pink lace dress. Her stepfather gives her away as her real father died when she was young.

e

: A 60-year-old Brenda Appleton is still happily married 35 years on, and remains so until John sadly dies in 2009.

Sophie Wong Born 1988

a

Jean Griffiths Born 1932

a

b

c

b c d

e

e

d 73

f a: Little two-year-old Sophie (right) had style

from a young age. In the park with her cousins, little did she know that 20 years later, jumpsuits would be coveted by all.

b:Just a year later, Sophie ups the style and the

a

: A baby Jean plays ball on the beach in Anglesey.

b: A 15-year-old Jean was

on the Chadderton Grammar School hockey team. ‘Our PE kit was rather different back then!’

g

big hair stakes. ‘This is me with my oldest friend, Kayleigh. I’m at her Halloween party in her back garden. And my best effort at a scary costume was this rather fetching musical note sweater.’

This is early 90s, but oh so 80s.

c: At 23, Jean marries Leslie Mills and is given away by her dad, William

c:‘The onset of the mobile phone invasion…I

d: Jean’s daughter Christine gets married when Jean is 52, and she dresses

think this was my Dad’s first mobile phone! I’m 11 here…I put on one of my Mum’s coats and her sunglasses and was actually convinced I was cool. I also distinctly remember my top was from The Gap - I loved it so much.’

d:A 16-year-old Sophie tames the ‘fro with a

hat and remains firm friends with Kayleigh. ‘We made each other photo books of our lives as ‘best friends’ for Christmas.’

e:Now 22, Sophie (second right) dresses up for a school reunion, regressing back to her two-yearold self in florals.

Griffiths. ‘My dress was custom made by a local dressmaker. It was broderie anglaise and very expensive.’

up for the big day in baby blue, perfectly matched from her hat to her gloves to her tights.

e: Jean continues the blue theme three years later on the wedding day of her other daughter, Heather. Loving the clutch and cute bow detail on her dress.

f

: ‘Cutting the cake on my silver wedding anniversary in 1980, on my trusty Hostess Trolley – a mobile piece of furniture that kept cooked food hot.’ Genius.

g: 73-year-old Jean celebrates 50 years of marriage and gives us all a renewed faith in weddings…

words: Esme Riley

Kay Williams and Peter Randall Born 1941 and 1937 a b c

e

d

f

a: Peter as a 17-year-old in the army, in Malaya. b: Kay and Peter on holiday in 1958. ‘This is in Blackpool, where we first met.’ Who needs Paris? c: Three years later, the couple marry at St John’s church in Walthamstow. Kay keeps it chic in a classy short-sleeved dress and flower in her hair.

d: In 1972, the family’s grown to five. ‘We’re on holiday in Kent here.’ e: The 90s arrive, and a 51-year-old Peter grabs The Sun for a break from building a bungalow. The headline reads ‘Les and his wife split’.

Les Dennis? Fat Les? Guesses on a postcard.

f

: Kay and Peter are still going strong in 2009. ‘We’re at my granddaughter’s 21st birthday party in the Suffolk countryside – a lifetime away from Blackpool.’

a

b

c

And me...Esme Riley Born 1988

a. Esme and brothers and cousins 1991 b. Here I am with my brothers and two cousins on the beach in Southwold… c. Esme and brothers and cousins 2009 …And here we are again, 18 years later and thankfully wearing more clothes.

Kim Riley Born 1949 c

a b

d

e

f

a: ‘This is me with my dad in 1952. We were on a family holiday in Dorset. My relatives were all in farming so every year we’d go and visit them from Brighton and enjoy countryside holidays.’

b: A 12-year-old Kim wears his school uniform with pride. ‘I went to a bluecoat school, so the uniform remained unchanged and dates back to the 16th century. It consisted of long yellow socks, breeches, a bluecoat and a clerical band – the white thing popping out the top of my shirt. It was fixed with a safety pin that you had to push almost into your neck and out the other side!’

Kim’s father died a year before when Kim was 11. He has vivid memories of the teacher sitting him down in his boarding house and telling him the news. His body was found on a train track.

c: By 1978, Kim had carved a successful career as a journalist. ‘I was working for the Birmingham Post, and this photo accompanied my feature on ‘walks in the west Midlands area’. That’s walks with horses, apparently.

d: Two years later, and Kim has met his future wife. They’re holidaying in America and this particular photo is at San Diego Zoo. He assures me such teeny tiny high-waisted shorts were all the rage back then. But on men?! I’m also very much enjoying his clogs. ‘I lost one of them in the Grand Canyon!’ Possibly a good thing.

e: In 1988, Kim cradles his youngest child and could swear he still owns the stripy shirt. ‘I’m also wearing my dad’s wind-up watch, which I still wear today – except I need to fix the strap.’ Please note spooky similarities to photo one.

f: Aged 45, and Kim’s a BBC TV journalist. He pulls his best pose for a promo shot.

75

it’s a new year

January is all about turning over a new leaf. Katie Service asks who needs a New Year’s Resolution when you can have a new lipstick instead?

The Studio Believe it or not, some people really don’t like having their hair cut. If this is you then you clearly haven’t visited international session stylist Johnnie Sapong in his new Soho studio. After years of travelling the world working on shows and campaigns, hairstylist Johnnie has finally found himself a base in his home town. The studio itself is located above an art gallery and its walls are filled with incredible artwork including genuine Banksy prints! Johnnie’s aim is to recreate that bespoke A-lister experience and make it available for the likes of you and me. A bit more exciting than a short back and sides on the highstreet. Check out ‘The Studio’ at www.johnniesapong.com

SuperDry Nails First it was American Apparel, then Topshop and now... Superdry! That’s right highstreet chain Superdry is set to launch its first brightly coloured nail polish range designed to be mixed and matched with their T-shirt range. A great excuse to buy more clothes.

Davina Peace

Spa at Chancery Court

LVL Lashes Are you tired of trying every new mascara that promises to give you ‘fuller, longer lashes’ only to find them to be a big old disappointment? Well Who’s Jack have found something that could save you a whole lot of time (and wasted money).

LVL Lashes are taking the beauty world by storm by straightening rather than curling eyelashes to give them a natural looking lift and making them appear fuller and longer. The treatment takes about an hour and lasts around 6 weeks depending on your lashes. The therapist chooses an LVL lashes Silicone Shield that best fits the shape of your eyelid and secures it to the lashes. A gel formulation is then used to secure your eyelashes individually over the shield. Once they are all secured LVL Lashes Lifting Balm is applied which contains conditioning proteins. Once the Sheild is removed your eyelashes are left looking wider and more awake and barely need any mascara.

Basically, a dream come true. For more information on the treatment and what else LVL can offer head to www.lvl-lashes.co.uk

It’s that time of the year again when heavy drinking and partying begin to take their toll. We’re all back at work and missing the time off so what better way to ease yourself in to the daily grind than with a visit to the spa at Chancery Court hotel in Holborn? Spa at Chancery Court is part of the Renaissance Hotel and is an award winning day spa offering loads of different treatments for men and women at pretty reasonable prices. One of their signature treatments is the Tension Suspension massage (£85 for 55 minutes) and we here at Jack are big fans. The massage is designed to target the side effects of a stressful lifestyle focusing on areas of tension in the body. The masseuse beings the treatment by asking a series of questions to define the areas that need concentrating on and also allows you to pick the oils that you’d like to be used. After the massage which concentrates on the shoulders, back, scalp and neck there is also a short skin consultation followed by a mini facial which also uses cold stones to ease any puffiness. What really makes the Spa at Chancery Court stand out against some other London spas is the facilities that are on offer to everyone including those who have just popped in for a massage.

As well as a relaxation room stocked with fruit, drinks and magazines there is also a sauna meaning that you can stay in the spa a lot longer than the allocated 55 minutes. www.spachancerycourt.com

If you love the idea of only using eco-friendly beauty products but cringe at the thought of ugly brown packaging sitting on your dressing table then you’ll be excited to discover that someone finally concocted the winning combination: luxury products that are eco and really, really work. Davina believes that if you are paying for luxury, then eco-friendly should be a given. If you buy a £100 hand cream then you expect the ingredients to be responsibly sourced, right? Davina is herself a marketing whizz from Saatchi & Saatchi origins and has just launched her first capsule beauty collection consisting of candles, body oils and creams into Harrods in time for the New Year.

Skin Wisdom Day Spa This vast new spa product range is now available at some of the UK’s top spa resorts - Pure in Edinburgh, Kuno Tierra in Mayfair, Glow in Chester and... wait for it... Tesco! The idea is that you get the professional spa experience affordably, at home. The products come in 4 sophisticated scents ‘Gingerlily & Orange’, ‘Rose & Geranium’, ‘Vanilla & Napoli’ and ‘Warm Cinnamon and Fig’. These sound a bit like Tom Ford fragrances to me (ie. they smell expensive!) I was given a quick hand massage from one of the Pure spa girls and my hands felt hydrated, smooth and line free for hours afterwards. Silky but not sticky. Bring on Bath Time!!

77

JACK'S NY Resolutions Listen to…

Random Impulse. We first stumbled across this electric-guitar-playing-grime-MC back in the latter part of 2010 when he played at our Jack Comes Alive night and although his career has been a bit of a slow burner we predict big things for him this year.

Impressively R.I. has become one of the top 20 most watched UK artists on Youtube following the weekly refixes of well known songs that he uploads to the site. Look out for his first single, Overload out this month. www.myspace.com/randomimpulse1 James Blake. The London producer is going to be all over our iPods and the office stereo this year. First it was his debut single Limit To Your Love that grabbed our attention and now we’re looking forward to even more from this ‘post-dubstep’ musical master. www.myspace.com/jamesblakeproduction

Wear…

Lace and Tassels. Both were once seen as the height of elegance and glamour because they both took so long to make (often weeks to make a single tassel or a single piece of lace) and they’re firmly in fashion for 2011.

Whether we’re donning lace shorts, a tassel belt or a handbag decorated with both, lace and tassels are the trimming on the fashion cake this year.

70’s Glamour. First it was the 50s and 60s and now the 70s are making a come back.

This year we shall be doing our best to pull off 70s items from bohemian pieces to glamorous 70s dresses. Think roll neck jumpers tucked in to shorts, high waisted trousers, blouses and all things disco inspired and you’ll be along the right track.

True Tailoring and everything that goes with it.

Men, your days of slouching around in skinny jeans and T-shirts are soon to be numbered. 2011 is all about the tailored smart casual, think proper trousers, cords, suit jackets, briefcases and brogues.

Go and see…

Kate Moross’ first exhibition. Aged just 24 Kate Moross has her fingers in lots of arty pies including illustration, fashion (she has a sell out t-shirt line for Topshop), graphics and her own design-led music label called Isomorph Records and in 2011 she’ll be putting on her first ever solo exhibition which will bring together a selection of all of her work. A date hasn’t been set yet but we’ll be keeping an eye on www.katemoross.com for more details.

Modern British Sculpture at London Royal Academy. Opening on 22nd January the exhibition will examine 20th-century British sculpture and will include work from the likes of Damien Hirst and Bill Woodrow and Phillip King. www.royalacademy.org.uk

DATING To date, or not to date, that is the question...

This month, a number of terrible things have happened.

Firstly, my laptop broke. There were all kinds of scary messages about key loggers, Trojan horses, crazy horses – the lot. Bummer.

THEN, I joined a new gym (single people have to find ways to fill their time), only to find that the Gym Bunny now works there. Double bummer.

I thought the trauma (I use the term loosely) was over after those incidents. Until one wintery Sunday when I had a bit of a shock to the system. A teeny, tiny part of me, like 5%, thought that it might be quite nice to have a boyfriend.

[Cue horror music.]

After this frankly terrible thought crossed my mind, I was ashamed and somewhat annoyed.

[Cue my stubborn streak.]

As a rebellion to the bad thoughts and at the risk of going on a date and falling for the first man who I stumbled upon, I decided not to go on a date this month.

(I hope I don’t get sacked.) Instead I decided to figure out why 10% of my little brain wanted a boyfriend. And remind myself why 90% did not.

Let’s get to the cause of this naughty 10%...

It all started when my laptop broke (I’m writing this on my BlackBerry on the tube. Not helping the sacking case here am I).

It was four years old which in laptop years equates to about 64. I tried to Google new laptops, as it wasn’t completely fucked (it is now) but got scared by the Trojan horses which were galloping all over my desktop.

Then there were messages that told me someone could be stealing my details and hacking my bank details as I typed. Pah! I’d like to see them try. It might have actually done me a favour. At least that way I could have tried to claim compensation for some transactions; ‘£185 in Topshop - not me. No officer, can’t stand the place if I’m honest.’ Hmm. Anyway, after about three minutes of trying, I gave up.

This was when the naughty boyfriend thoughts came into my mind. (Not THAT kind of naughty, you sickos.) I was thinking that if I had a boyfriend, I could have called him and asked him to help me find a laptop. He would have known what a hard drive was and what RAM stands for.

Oh what I’ve missed.

The second time I wished I had a boyfriend, actually wished is a bit strong. The second time I thought a boyfriend would be a nice addition to my life was after I’d stayed in my friend’s bed – sans memory foam mattress. My back was killing me and I was walking like Quasimodo. What I really wanted was for someone to click my back, and rub in a bit of deep heat. Not that my Mum didn’t offer.

My third and final (phew) moment of weakness was when I was in bed one Sunday (it’s what God intended people, don’t argue with it). I was watching Madagascar on my own. It would have been nice to have someone to lean on/ lay on/get me refills of tea. Not that I view men as slaves, obviously.

Next month I’ll stop being stubborn and go on another date in search of someone who’ll score 10/10. But I don’t REALLY need a full-time boyfriend anyway. As it happens, I rubbed the deep heat in myself. I can refill my own mug of tea - or get a flask, and on the plus side, at least I don’t have to rub deep heat on anyone else.

As for the laptop issue, I’m just gonna do what I usually do in times of technological difficulty…pick the model that comes in pink. Foolproof. words: Georgina Childs

I ain’t saying she’s a gold digger...

JACK EATS

Adam talks about

You hear about it in the press all the time, faded old rock stars or rich old business men gambling their fortunes by hooking up with outrageously young and beautiful girls. Old fools you may think, and a fool and his money are soon parted, but most have their assets cunningly protected through a legal document called a prenup.

This sets out what each person is entitled to in the event of the marriage breaking down. Unfortunately for potential rich Brit sleazes, the UK courts have never recognised the validity of prenup agreements.

That is, until now, when a Supreme Court judge enforced an ante-nuptial agreement, or prenup for the first time in the UK. The case that made the headlines in October this year wasn’t some aging member of the Beatles or a Russian oligarch with a svelte lovely, but German heiress Katrin Radmacher with a £100 million fortune and her bio-tech researcher husband. His payout was limited to a mere £1 million in lieu of maintenance.

You can get a prenup drawn up by most London law firms; they start in the low thousands, and rise depending on the complexity of your assets. If you’ve got a wide portfolio of investments in the Cayman Islands it will probably cost you a darn sight more than if you’re wealth consists of a couple of Friends boxed sets and every Ministry of Sound album. I could probably have one scribbled on the back of a cigarette packet.

Are prenups really relevant to our generation? ‘Generation Y’, as the media have named us, have typically got less in the way of material possessions and, especially in London, tend to rent rather than buy property. A bunch of hobos with barely more than the clothes on our back, whether my ex takes half of my student debt or the balance on my Starbucks card, I’m not too fussed.

I believe there are some positive benefits to this new legal precedent, London will now be a much more attractive place of residence for the rich and famous.

Knowing that their wealth protecting marriage clauses should be upheld will bring more wealthy business leaders and celebs into the capital, if we can fit any more in.

It could be argued that the prenup is only fair, and that you should take out of the marriage what you brought in. A lot of people were very scathing about Heather Mills McCartney’s enormous payout and had Sir Paul been able to get an enforceable prenup he may have been saved millions, and the man that gave us The Frog Song surely deserves every penny.

The biggest celebrity loser in divorce payouts to date is reckoned to be Michael Jordan, handing over a staggering $168 million to his ex-wife Juanita. Other high profile payouts include Madonna waving goodbye to Guy Ritchie and $76 million, and Heather Mills McCartney hopping off with $48 million.The most recent headline grabbing divorce settlement was athlete on and off the course Tiger Woods, who forked out a rumoured $110 million.

It’s not just the nouveau riche that suffers; think of the poor British aristocracy, stuck in their crumbling stately homes, many have had seats in the House of Lords taken away. Then along comes some deceitful chap or money grabbing harlot who runs off with half of the family silver thanks to duping someone into marriage. The prenup could help them hand their inherited wealth down from chinless wonder, to chinless wonder.

Actually no, scratch that. I don’t care.

Effectively a prenup is a big get out clause, and in my mind demonstrates a lack of commitment. ‘I don’t trust you enough not to run off with my money, but I want to commit the rest of my life to you’ is the implication. It treats marriage more like a business transaction; a prenup is akin to an insurance policy for the risk of the marriage turning sour.

If you are going to view marriage in such a cold cynical manner, is it worth getting married at all?

Imagine the scene, the dashing young man is on bended knee, staring up at his beautiful beloved ‘Will you marry me?’ he asks. ‘Why of course darling!’ she gushes, ‘But first Daddy says you’ll have to sign this contract in front of a witness.’

It rather kills the moment. There is nothing romantic about talking money when you are committing to spend the rest of your life with someone.

Some people may have been put off marriage by the worry that, if things don’t work out, there is no protection for their wealth. I know someone who really loves his partner but called off the wedding when he thought deeper about the possible implications for the family business. Although I don’t necessarily agree with such a drastic step, perhaps the fear of losing something that has been passed down into your trust can be understood.

I can see that prenups serve a purpose, to stop gold diggers subverting marriage to get their grubby hands on riches, and perhaps to put the UK in line with the rest of the world. However, there is no chance that I would either propose with a contract in my back pocket, or accept such a proposal from another. If I’m ever to get married I’ll be going all in, not bluffing my hand with an ace up my sleeve.

Adam Roan Henderson

The Empress Of India Situated right next to Victoria Park this pub style eatery is in the perfect location for some East London dining.

Despite what the name suggests The Empress of India does not serve Indian cuisine. Instead they offer an impressive variety of gastro style foods.

We opted for Confit of duck terrine, apple and fig chutney, homemade brioche loaf and the scallops for starters followed by steak and chips (we’ve never seen a steak quite that big before) and slow cooked shin of veal and goose fat roast potatoes for the main. Service was quick and there was a buzz about the place. The surroundings nice too with leather sofas and murals decorating the walls as well as some random chandeliers made from muscle shells.

Worth popping down to even if it’s just for a few cocktails as their extensive list rivals any other bar in the nearby area.

130 Lauriston Road, Victoria Park E9 7LH www.theempressofindia.com

The Real Greek The Real Greek has a new menu that has been devised with help from chef, Aris. The new dishes comprise a selection of hot and cold options that have been added to the already brilliant menu such as Bruschetta with Greek Style Salsa and Feta Mousse, a twist on a classic and a delicious one at that, toasted bread with a feta mousse and a sweet tomato salsa.

Also Soutzoukakia Smirneika, Aris’s homemade spicy beef meatballs served with a rich and spicy tomato sauce.

The Reel Greek has a number of restaurants scattered over London including Hoxton, Bankside, Covent Garden, Westfield and Spitalfields, they are all great value and all have the truly welcoming atmosphere of a family run Greek restaurant. A handy tip for all those counting the calories after Christmas and New Year is that the menu includes all calorific values so if you want to watch them, you can.

56 Paddington Street, W1U 4HY www.therealgreek.com

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TVonics Freeview + HD Recorder

PICK OF THE MONTH Done with all the Christmassy red, green, sliver, gold and general bright colours of the festive season?

Us too, which is why we have decided to find as many dull/ dark colours we could to include in this months pick of the month. All of the products featured are just as nice as normal, it’s just they give your eyes a bit of a rest is all.

You’re welcome.

Jacquard Tote Bag Coming from the school of thought that a bag can never be too big this Jacquard Tote bag is big enough to fit in all your necessary bits and bobs and then some. Ideal if you’re popping out food shopping or for a day at the shops, this recycle-symbol-stitched bag also promotes a more ethical message and costs £40.00. www.openingceremony.us

If you were lucky enough to have got your mits on an HD TV this Christmas then this could be just the right thing for you.

The TVonics Freeview + HD Recorder has a massive 500GB hard drive meaning that it allows you to record hundreds of hours of HD programmes straight from the TV. The TVonics DTR-HD500 retails at £279.99 and can be brought from www.tvonics.com.

The Dr Martens new SS/11 range hits the

shops this month and offers a mouth-watering selection of colours put to some classic shapes including hardwearing shoes and the ever favourite boot. Various prices. www.drmartens.com

Get in early on the enivitable foral trends with this dress fashioned on the original Luella offering, £45.00 www.rarefashion.co.uk What’s your poison? Well it can be anything you like with this poison marked decanter and glass set. a great addition to any drinks cabinet or table, £120. www.belleinteriors.co.uk

Guy de Jean Triangle Umbrella What do you get when you put together two wildly talented French designers and ask them to come up with a rain-withholding devise? This Guy de Jean Triangle umbrella of course.

For their newest round of collaborations, Jean Paul Gaultier and Guy de Jean have created a series of umbrellas that will keep you dry through any rainy spots that may come our way this month. £60.00 www.openingceremony.us

Sony Ericsson Live View Not so long ago this little piece of technology won an award for the Most Innovative Accessory so Jack thought it was about time that we told you a little bit more. The Sony Ericsson Live View allows you to take control of your phone without ever having to take it out.

Basically Live View is a wireless phone remote that allows you to do a number of things without having to have your phone in your hand. Such as the ability to see who is calling you, what your battery life is and social networking updates. The Live View also allows you to control music that is played from your phone and costs just £49.00 from www.sonyericsson.com

Life Adjustment Center by Ryan McGinley A combination of his latest bodies of work all packed in to one seamless manifestation of his imaginative spirit. Published

by Dashwood Books this hardcover book is being released to accompany his latest show at Radio3 in San Francisco and includes one of Jack’s favourite ever images (the naked woman carrying a wolf). £30. www.ryanmcginley.com

THIS JANUARY

London Art Exhibition 19th-23rd Jan The London Art Fair returns from the 19th – 23rd January featuring over 100 London galleries, all coming together to show their best selection of works with a wide range of themes, mediums and prices from leading figures as well as new emerging talent.

The main location is the Business Design Centre on Upper Street but with so many galleries and artists involved you are best to go here and type in key areas or artists.

Business Design Centre Islington N1

Secret Sample Sale

Dior Illustrated You have six days left to see one of the most fashionable exhibitions of 2010/11. The exhibition features artwork from renowned fashion illustrator Rene Gruau who created the marketing images for Dior’s first perfumer, Miss Dior, back in 1947. Someset House houses these works and more of his works for Parfums that came along thereafter as well as bottles, sketches and a selection of glamorous snapshots from the era surrounding the designer. There are also vintage items and a selection of couture dresses.

On until 6th January 10am-6pm £5.00 The Strand, Strand, London, WC2R 1LA

Sampled at Sader’s Wells We are putting together a decently arty January for you and here is one more to add to the education calendar, Sampled at Sadler’s Wells, which will bring together all forms of dance for you the audience. Brilliant value for the mix of entertainment on offer the event showcases hip hop to ballet and everything in between. If you are looking to experience something a little fresher than Strictly and more exciting than looking around the dance floor at the club you went to on New Years Eve but don’t exactly want to go to an expensive theatre experience this is for you.

28 January 2011 29 January 2011 £6.00 - £12.00 Rosebery Avenue, Islington, EC1R 4TN

Sing for your supper at Zizzi Zizzi’s new restaurant has teamed up with the Prince Charles Trust to give you a few free dinners and give a platform to support new artists, Zizzi Sessions. Every Thursday in the brand new restaurant in that funny new building, Central St Giles, you can sit and listen to some great jazz and if you are brave enough opt to sing for your supper where you can take to the same stage after the artist to get your meal for free. www.centralsaintgiles.com www.zizzi.co.uk

If you’re not the kind of person that will sit in the freezing cold from the wee hours of the morning waiting for a discounted handbag or mustering up the courage to push through crowds and fight people for discount shoes then these secret sample sales may be for you.

81 Held at the Truman Brewery once a month these sales include makes such as Roberto Cavalli, See by Chloe, Paul and Joe, Alexander McQueen, Oki Ni and more all for 80% off.

You can even see it all before anyone else by signing up and becoming a member to be allowed to rummage first before the sale gets opened to the public.

There are no exact dates scheduled in for the next event at the moment but we do know that it will be in February so sign up and wait with bated breath for your email notification. www.secretsamplesale.co.uk

MY 2-4-1 Pound Life

Lucy Hancock image : Katie Allen

I have decided to take this opportunity to offer a sort of public health warning to the readers of Who’s Jack. Last night I found myself suckered to the face of a squat advertising salesman. As he poked is cold, hard tongue searchingly through my slightly gritted teeth and curled his non existent lips around mine, I reminded myself that I should have been able to tell by his mouth that he was going to be a truly awful kisser. I am now casting myself the role of modern day kissing phrenologist. Not in a scary Nazi way, but in a practical/ avoiding terrible sex way.

From my extensive and thorough experience of kissing wildly inappropriate men and then accidentally sleeping with them I have come to discover that there is a direct correlation to the size and shape of man’s mouth and his kissing technique, which everyone knows is (literally) a taster of how good the sex’ll be. Everyone knows that past the age of 13 the techniques of washing machine and goldfish are no longer allowed, so why do people keep pressing their horrible mouths up against mine?

If it is indeed true that scientists have found we spend more time looking at the mouth of a person we have the hots for than any other part of their face, then why aren’t people paying more attention to them? People are always banging on about eyes, but when was the last time you pressed your wet eyeballs against each others as a precursor to sexy time.

Below is a list of a few of the mouths you have to look out for.

Lazy Mouth - This may sound like a parable, but the lazy mouth

is hazardous. The lazy mouth is often slacken and wet. The lips fall away from the mouth often exposing a large tongue. Jamie Oliver for example when not trying to control his unruly mouth in a really weird grimace is routinely pictured with his tongue just lolling out. In the bedroom the lazy mouth is keen but sloppy, so sex bears more resemblance to being in bed with an Irish Setter.

Ratty Mouth - In the ratty mouth, the top lip appears to be connected to the filtrum in some way making it look pointy. The bottom lip always looks a long way away from the top. In kissing, the ratty mouth will usually focus their energies on the bottom lip as they find it hard to get a purchase on the top. Combined with their inevitable sinus problems, after the diabolical sex the ratty mouth will snore. This is a really bloody awful mouth. People with this sort of mouth are rarely attractive.

Busy Mouth - A busy mouth is a person that eats a lot of Holland and Barrett omega mix very slowly. They are nibblers who put too much energy into pronouncing words and get bits round their tiny mouths. They don’t have any lips to speak of and their kissing technique is rigid and exploratory and their teeth are sharp.

Advertising salesman fits firmly into this category.

The same definitely applies to the laydeez. If we’re crowning worst mouths in the world first place can definitely be awarded to X-Factor’s Cher Lloyd. Whether she is expressing her pretend hip-pop attitude or acute emotional pain through her Busy Mouth.

If you could get her to stop crying for long enough she’d be crap in bed. To be honest I don’t think I have to worry too much about anyone trying to kiss me again soon. This week my sister and I have spent our time optimistically practicing our disguises for Secret Millionaire. She is currently sporting a pink ‘Slappers on Tour’ cap.

F

Generation

Douglas Coupland wrote an opinion piece recently for The Globe and Mail entitled, A radical pessimist’s guide to the next 10 years. The Cliff Notes were that we’re on an express elevator to hell, going down. The future is a relentless brutal juggernaut, bearing down on each of us with inescapable mundanity and unpredictability.

The middle class is dead, retail is oversubscribed, individuality is absorbed into a troposphere of data encircling the Earth (an e-zone layer, if you will), and people who compulsively pun are labelled mentally ill.

In Coupland’s eyes we are now Generation F. F for fucked. These are not the mere ramblings of a zeitgeisty surrealist author in need of a quick cheque, this is the manifesto for the deeply pessimistic, a bleak Candide prophecy that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong... but perhaps Coupland is not nearly pessimistic enough.

It’s great that unemployment is up, because it will give us more time to watch Ray Mears and Bear Grills repeats during the day and maybe, just maybe, enough sinks in that some of us will survive long enough when the deluge comes to make a difference. In the meantime, it’s of some comfort that regardless of how desperate it gets outside your four walls, your TV will shine just as bright.

Perhaps technological singularity will occur in the 21st century, but just don’t rely on technology to save us, or make our lives any easier. Anti-science, anti-technology, and anti-intellectualism movements will hijack and resist any truly life-altering technological advance, and to say nothing of the corporate interests that will inevitably control it. Worse case scenario, strides in technology will create a wider gulf between the haves and have not’s. Best case scenario, it’s just really expensive.

First world countries, ravaged by unemployment and rising oil prices, will outsource their overseas skirmishes for dwindling oil reserves to the lowest bidder, a dial-a-goon agency better equipped than NATO. Irrespective of the catastrophe, man made or natural, the first on the scene of any disaster, rationing aid and underwriting their cost-plus contracts will be a bunch of hepped up, trigger-happy mercs, just itching to use their new hardware on ‘looters’ and write off the ammo as an expense. Which is fine, because we would have all moved out of the suburbs and into inner cities, to rely on the broken transport system that remains, as petrol-hungry behemoth imports will lay rotting in abandoned driveways. Coupland may be throwing these ideas out there hoping we get the joke, but at least Voltaire had one thing right, we must cultivate our garden.

words: Luke Hayward In association with Relentless Energy Summer Bloggers Campaign www.RelentlessEnergy.com

Adam takes on a book a month to judge it for ease of read, quality of content and ability to make you forget the packed sweaty minutes of the commute.

SHIT LIT Premiership Psycho Footballers used to be confined to the back pages, but we’ve been hit with sex scandal after sex scandal in the past few years. We’ve seen our on the pitch idols fall from grace in sordid and increasingly bizarre off pitch antics. Wayne Rooney and his grandmother hooker, Stan Collymore dogging and Ronaldo with transvestite hookers! It’s getting hard to imagine the next one. Premier league footballer caught in midget amputee romp? Soccer star in polar bear shame? They’ve probably already happened.

The culture of celebrity and enormous brand potential of the top stars have thrust these ultimate athletes into what, for many, is uncomfortable territory. Most have been spotted at a young age, had enormous amounts of money thrown at them and are protected from reality by fawning agents. Is it any wonder they feel they are not bound by the same rules as the rest of us?

I’m reminded of the fall from grace of a local hero where I grew up called Lee Hughes, a roofer by trade who started his career with the mighty *cough* Kidderminster Harriers. For a somewhat ungainly looking ginger lad he was a magician on the football pitch. He could produce goals from nothing, and we won game after game thanks to his prodigious talent. Inevitably he caught the eye of better sides, playing for Coventry City and most successfully West Bromwich Albion, including a spell in the Premier League.

Earning thousands a week and at the top

words : Adam Roan Henderson

of his game Lee Hughes looked invincible.

Unfortunately a bizarre incident cut his playing career short; his flash Mercedes CLS 500 was involved in a horrific crash which resulted in the death of one of the passengers of the other car.

Seemingly unaware the law applied to him Lee Hughes fled the scene and was subsequently imprisoned for six years for causing death by dangerous driving and leaving the scene of an accident. With this one moment of madness he effectively ended his career in the top leagues of football.

A new novel by C M Taylor pokes fun at the life of top flight footballers with a very sharp stick. Premiership Psycho is in turn laugh out loud funny, and horrifying. If you’ve read American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis you will recognise the frequent brand references, highlighting the shallow, materialist nature of the protagonist Kev King. Kev’s obsession with his looks strikes a chord with anyone who has looked at the preening prima donnas that populate our pitches and wished they’d concentrate on the bloody football.

Despite the distractions Kev King still performs on the pitch, there are some great passages of football commentary where he runs rings around the opposition. These take back seat to the biting wit with which C M Taylor paints a picture of the premiership footballer’s

lifestyle. Kev’s exploits, hanging out at the best clubs wearing the best suits are described with an obsessive attention to detail. One of my favourite scenarios is when a poor member of club staff ends up on the wrong side of Kev King after a very entertaining argument about the provenance of the beans in his coffee.

This proves a terminal error for the poor barista.

Premiership Psycho is a great read and although it took me a while to get into the stylised writing, it’s well worth the endeavour. The world of football has been in dire need of such a cruel satire, the name checked brands and topical stories about Kev King’s troubles with his WAG and the press could have been lifted straight from the tabloids. Once the novel gets going it rips through at a cracking pace and will make you guffaw and wince on the tube in equal measure.

But a word of warning: if you happen to wander into Movida this weekend, just be careful not to spill your drink on the guy in the Ralph Lauren Purple Label suit, wearing the Panerai Luminor 1950 8 Days GMT 44mm on his wrist. You never know what trouble it may get you into….

PREMIERSHIP PSYCHO C.M. TAYLOR Published by Corsair on the 27th January 2011 Paperback £7.99

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