WHAT’S IN A NAME? PERSONAL ESSAY words and photography by Shakira Wood
I hated my name growing up, Shakira Wood! Before Shakira Shakira (hips don’t lie) came along, no one had heard of the name so could never pronounce it correctly and my first school wasn’t the most diverse - I was one of only a handful of kids from a multicultural background. Not only was I always the last to be called on the register (my son has my husband’s surname Cliff – so I’ve escalated him to the front of the line), but I used to get so embarrassed having to tell people my name. I would always get a funny look, or comment. I remember wanting to change my name and on the odd occasion, I would tell people I had a different name entirely. I’m not sure if it was the difficulty people had pronouncing it that embarrassed me more or the connotation of where my name and therefore I originated from. Whilst I don’t like to think about which it was, it’s definitely telling of the times. My response to people who upon hearing my name and perplexingly asking that vile question “what are you?”, would be to say “I’m half cast”. It was only after that comment was met with one too many astonished gasps that I realised it wasn’t a very pc thing to say, unbeknown to me I was only repeating the term that my school friends had branded me with. How at the age of six with a foreign sounding name and a face that doesn’t quite fit by other people’s standards, do you find the words to explain that your parents are from different ethnic backgrounds. As a child the last thing you want to be seen as is different and when the first conversation you have with anyone new is about your race, it can be tough.
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