41 09 willamette week, december 31, 2014

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ŏ ŏPORTLAND’S NEWSWEEKLY

“OH MY GOD, I’M NOT SLOWING DOWN.”

PORTLAND TRIED TO RUN FROM UBER. THEN THE MAYOR GRABBED THE WHEEL.

BY AARON MESH PAGE 10

P. 18

CHARLIE

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STEVE RADIO

WWEEK.COM

VOL 41/09 12.31.2014

HALES

UBER PRODUCTION

DAVID

AIR

BROOKE

NOVICK CAB PLOUFFE BNB STEGER

MARK

WITH

RATED PG-13 FOR STRONG LANGUAGE AND THREATS OF IMPLIED VIOLENCE.

WIENER

AS “THE FIXER”

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NEWS DO TORTURERS DESERVE SYMPATHY? FOOD PREVIEWING 2015 OPENINGS. MOVIES CHATTING WITH ALEX COX.

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

JEFF DREW

FINDINGS

PAGE 21

WHAT WE LEARNED FROM READING THIS WEEK’S PAPER VOL. 41, ISSUE 9.

Taking on a union boss and former drug dealer is “cowardly.” 4 Torture is a labor-intensive activity and burnout is an issue.

Torturers are more exhausted than, say, members of death squads. 8 City Commissioner Steve Novick’s talks with Uber may have set an all-time speed record for proving Godwin’s law. 10

In 1992, there was no such thing as parabolic skis. By 1998, no one was making non-parabolic skis anymore. 18

ON THE COVER:

Annie Hall is a Spanish-born DJ who loved techno so much she moved to Detroit. 28

Amy Schumer got Comedy Central to allow the word “pussy” on-air. 36 The original director of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas would’ve fired Johnny Depp on the first day, had not he himself been fired. 40

One Baltimore man’s “crash course in manhood” included shooting at someone on film

and then asking someone else to make a movie about it. 41

OUR MOST TRAFFICKED STORY ONLINE THIS WEEK:

The mayor loves Uber like McAdams loves Gosling. Photo

by Natalie Behring.

A bunch of bars closed.

STAFF Editor-in-Chief Mark Zusman EDITORIAL Managing Editor for News Brent Walth Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Aaron Mesh, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, James Yu Stage & Screen Editor Rebecca Jacobson Web & Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Music Editor Matthew Singer Books Penelope Bass Dance Kaitie Todd

Visual Arts Richard Speer Editorial Interns Gabriella Dunn, Parker Hall, Dakota Smith CONTRIBUTORS Nathan Carson, Rachel Graham Cody, Pete Cottell, Jordan Green, James Helmsworth, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, John Locanthi, Grace Stainback, Mark Stock PRODUCTION Production Manager Dylan Serkin Art Director Kathleen Marie Special Sections Art Director Kristina Morris Graphic Designers Mitch Lillie, Xel Moore

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

3

INBOX BARMAGEDDON 2014

I recognize a town that lacks low-key, down-toearth bars when I pass through one [“Closing Time,” WW, Dec. 24, 2014]. Those kind of bars are the only ones I feel comfortable in, whether I have a lot of money in my pocket or not. Saying it’s outsiders who are taking the soul out of this town would be an oversimplification (not that the author is saying that).

Really, it’s one type of preference of environment trumping another. The selective factors such as money and city leadership working in tandem mean one preference has an advantage.

In time, it changes back. Mayors come and go, migration ebbs and flows, and new buildings age and accumulate character.

Change is hard, but we adapt—life is cool like that. Rich yuppies are not cool like that.

—“eric gazzola” “Lisa Lucas, his landlord, says David Chow has indeed been a good tenant. But the neighborhood had changed, and her company could make more money with a different business on the property.”

A big part of the problem is that building owners are clueless about why neighborhoods change—because of their cool business tenants who had the perseverance to keep trying even after three years of losing money!

Get rid of those tenants, and neighborhoods decline in value.

—“Kenric L. Ashe” Most of the Matador did not go out the door with people on the last night. Close to nothing did except for a few paintings to employees. I was there the next day.

—“Nicholas Burgess”

In the never-ending quest for better hygiene, I recently purchased some “flushable wipes,” the better to keep my nether regions shower-fresh all day. However, I now hear rumors that such wipes are not actually flushable after all. Are they?

—Cornholio

From Tic Tacs to Summer’s Eve, products that assuage what I call “orifice insecurity”—the gnawing fear that our holes are socially unacceptable—will always sell.

Flushable wipes fit the bill. Originally pitched as “baby wipes,” these pre-moistened towelettes are increasingly marketed to adults.

There’s only one problem: Baby wipes don’t dissolve like toilet paper does. You can’t flush them without causing problems down the line.

For people with babies, this doesn’t matter; they just toss them into the diaper pail and throw them out with the trash. But childless adults don’t have the battle-hardened indifference to

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

UNION BOSS’S CRIMINAL PAST

Al Shropshire was a drug dealer [“Steaming Mad,” WW, Dec. 24, 2014]. A user can be forgiven, but a drug dealer has no moral compass.

The fact that he was a repeat offender speaks volumes. It just amazes me that union supporters minimize this. How hard can it be to find a qualified person with a clean record?

—“CGS” I work for a union and get so tired of how biased our country is, even our supposed local indie paper, in its reporting of so-called union or government corruption. Hypocrisy just oozes out of every report on the topic.

This is a prime example of cowardly journalism, to say the least.

—“Anti-fascist”

CORRECTIONS

In last week’s “Top 10 Stories 2014,” the name of writer Daniel Borgen was misspelled, and the TV show that chef Gregory Gourdet appears on was incorrect. He is a star on Top Chef.

In last week’s Scoop column, the amount of marijuana a person in Oregon can legally carry in public starting in July was incorrect. People 21 and older will be allowed to possess up to 1 ounce of marijuana in public and up to 8 ounces in their home. WW regrets the errors.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification.

Letters must be 250 or fewer words.

Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210.

Fax: (503) 243-1115. Email: mzusman@wweek.com.

poop that new parents do. We want those tainted (ahem) wipes gone yesterday.

This left the personal-care industry with two choices: invent a truly flushable wipe, or convince kicky young singles to keep diaper pails in their bathrooms alongside the Axe body spray.

Then again, you could just take regular nonflushable wipes and slap the word “flushable” on the box. And that’s pretty much what they did.

“Products that purport to be flushable cause huge maintenance headaches for sewer utilities everywhere,” says Linc Mann of the Portland Bureau of Environmental Services. Lest you think that sounds like somebody else’s problem, these wipes can also block your plumbing.

If I ran the city, I’d sue the wipe-makers for negligent advertising. Granted, I would also attend city functions wearing a giant hamburger head like Mayor McCheese. Still, it might be worth a look.

QUESTIONS? Send them to dr.know@wweek.com

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EDUCATION: Two public schools get painted out of the arts tax. 7 HOTSEAT: Reed College torture expert Darius Rejali.

8 COVER STORY: Why Uber hit reverse and backed out of Portland. 10

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Oregon Secretary of State Kate Brown is finally fulfilling her long-delayed promise to tackle campaign finance reform. Oregon is one of only four states that places no limits on political contributions. Brown is proposing bills for the 2015 Legislature that would set limits (as yet undefined) in state law and refer to voters a constitutional BROWN amendment that would allow the limits despite the Oregon Constitution’s broad free-expression protections.

“You shouldn’t be able to buy a bigger megaphone to drown out all the other voices,” says Tony Green, Brown’s spokesman.

“The First Amendment was designed to increase political discourse. Unlimited spending silences it.”

It no longer matters what City Hall comes up with for a street fee to fund transportation projects: An opposition group tells WW it will circulate petitions to force the proposal to the ballot. Mayor Charlie Hales and Commissioner Steve Novick’s ever-shifting plan would raise $46 million a year; both have been looking for ways to avoid putting the plan before voters. Hair salon owner Ann Sanderson, who leads a coalition of small-business owners and activists called Stop Portland Street Fee, says City Hall is trying to make prominent interest groups happy. “It will go on the ballot,” Sanderson says. “We’re not waiting to find out if the Portland Business Alliance is going to be on one side or the other.” On Dec. 29, Novick unveiled his latest version of the street fee, based on household income and estimated gasoline consumption. He’s also talking about proposing an income tax.

The American Civil Liberties Union of Oregon is looking for a new leader. Executive director Dave Fidanque has announced he will retire in March after 33 years with the ACLU, including 21 as state director. ACLU Oregon board president Jennifer Middleton praised Fidanque for changing the state’s “civil rights landscape.” She notes that when Fidanque took over, the Oregon Citizens Alliance was pushing local and statewide ballot measures to limit gay rights. “He immediately committed resources to challenging those measures in the courts, in the Legislature and at the ballot box,” Middleton said in a statement. “The ACLU has never let up on its efforts working as a key partner with the LGBT community, including its work to help achieve the freedom to marry for same-sex couples this year.”

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

Tuesday, Jan. 20, 2015 Grand Store Free!

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N I C K PAT TO N

NEWS

BRUSHED ASIDE TWO PUBLIC SCHOOLS IN PORTLAND FIND THE CITY HAS CUT THEM OUT OF ARTS-TAX MONEY.

BY BETH SLOVIC

bslovic@wweek.com

Leah Maurer is a Portland mother of three, ages 3, 7 and 9. That means she knows a lot about teaching how to share.

The city of Portland? Less so.

Portland voters approved the city’s arts tax in 2012, a $35-per-adult tax that has raised $8.5 million this year, mostly to help pay for art and music teachers at public elementary schools in the city, including charter schools.

But Southwest Charter School and Ivy Charter School recently learned they won’t be getting arts-tax money any longer, even though both are public, lie within city limits and serve Portland students. City officials, citing a quirk in the measure’s text, have decided to send the schools’ collective $36,000 a year elsewhere.

“It’s frustrating,” Maurer says. “My kids are missing out.”

The 2012 measure, as it appeared on the ballot, said arts-tax money would pay for instruction “for kindergarten-throughfifth-grade students at local public schools attended by Portland students.” A message

from then-Mayor Sam Adams assured voters the tax would serve Portland students “within the six Portland school districts.”

Jessica Jarratt Miller, former executive director of the Creative Advocacy Network that backed the tax, says Ivy and Southwest were meant to be included. “They weren’t purposefully excluded,” she says.

But a city employee examining enrollment numbers for the two schools found they both had been issued their charters by the Oregon Department of Education—and not part of any school district.

According to the tax’s fine print, schools that get arts-tax revenue must be under the umbrella of one of the six local school districts that draw Portland students—Centennial, David Douglas, Portland, Parkrose, Reynolds or Riverdale.

That includes six other charter schools inside Portland Public Schools’ boundaries that have elementary-school students—but not Ivy or Southwest.

Thomas Lannom, director of the city’s Revenue Bureau, defends the decision to cut off Southwest and Ivy. He says his office made a mistake by giving the schools the first half of their annual payments.

Lannom argues they don’t qualify under city code and rejects the complaint of parents that their children don’t benefit

from the arts tax. “Many parents in private schools are paying the arts tax and not getting the benefit,” he says.

But Ivy and Southwest are public schools. Southwest, located in the city’s South Waterfront, was formed by parents in 2007 after Portland Public Schools closed Smith Elementary and others. Parents tried to charter the school through PPS. But the district, having just closed several schools, rejected their application.

Parents had the state education department charter the school.

Ivy, with campuses in the Eliot and Beaumont-Wilshire neighborhoods, also went to the state for its charter after PPS wanted a cap on the school’s enrollment.

The two schools got pennies from the arts tax compared with what the larger Portland districts received. But the money meant a lot to the small schools’ communities. For Ivy, with 240 students, that had so far amounted to $11,597.74. For Southwest, with 185, the arts money so far came to $6,382.97.

Charter schools don’t enjoy universal acclaim in Portland, where they’re seen as a drain on neighborhood public schools. They also face criticism from organized labor because the schools aren’t required to hire a faculty that’s fully licensed or represented by teacher unions.

Southwest and Ivy aren’t entirely independent from the Portland district. The money to run Southwest and Ivy comes from the state. But the two schools cooperate with PPS to offer services for students with learning disabilities.

The city’s argument rests on a narrow reading of what it means to be “within the

district.” Stephen Bachara, an Ivy dad, interpreted that to be something geographical.

“When we were voting on the tax, I was told that all charter schools would be included, and find it troubling that two charter schools in PPS geographical boundaries are not included,” Bachara wrote in a recent email to city officials.

The City Council has made changes before to the arts tax, but members have also said they don’t want to make big switches that would require sending the tax back to voters.

Commissioners—responding to criticism that it was too regressive—revised the tax to apply only to Portlanders over 18 who earned more than $1,000 a year. Mayor Charlie Hales also reworded the tax to clarify that people living on Social Security and Oregon public employee pensions are exempt.

No elected official, it seems, wants to touch the arts tax again. Ivy and Southwest parents have asked Hales for help but haven’t gotten anywhere. The mayor’s office referred WW’s questions to Commissioner Nick Fish, who is liaison to the Regional Arts & Culture Council. “We have no plans to amend it,” Fish said in a statement.

Commissioners Dan Saltzman and Steve Novick say they’re not interested in a fix.

Commissioner Amanda Fritz says she would consider including Ivy and Southwest only if the City Council would review the entire arts-tax question.

Anne Gurnee, Southwest Charter School’s education director, says she hopes city officials change their minds.

“It’s a simple fix,” says Gurnee. “I don’t think the City Council when crafting this intended to leave us out.”

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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NATIONAL SECURITY DARRYL JAMES

NEWS

DARIUS REJALI A REED COLLEGE EXPERT SAYS THE DEBATE OVER U.S.-SPONSORED TORTURE OVERLOOKS ITS TOLL ON THOSE WHO CARRY IT OUT.

BY B E T H S LOV I C

b s l ov i c @ w w e e k . c o m

Earlier this month, the U.S. Senate Intelligence Committee published a scathing report on the Central Intelligence Agency’s use of torture after 9/11. The report found that, contrary to CIA claims, harsh interrogation techniques did not help the U.S. deter terrorism or find Osama bin Laden.

In the ensuing days, national news reporters turned to a Portland expert on torture—Reed College professor Darius Rejali—to help them make sense of the report’s context.

Rejali, 55, is the author of a definitive book on the topic, Torture and Democracy. He grew up in Iran before moving to the U.S. to attend Swarthmore College near Philadelphia.

He’s taught in Reed’s political science department for 25 years. And although he specializes in a dark topic, the college’s alumni magazine once described Rejali as lovable and lighthearted—“a short and portly Iranian American with an easy, gregarious laugh, [who] wears his erudition lightly; he is as likely to quote Harry Potter, Lewis Carroll, or Star Trek as Weber, Locke, or Foucault.”

Rejali spoke to WW about the conditions that create acceptance of torture, and why Americans should have sympathy for the rank-and-file citizens who carried out our leaders’ orders to torture.

WW: Who are the people who become torturers for a government, typically?

Darius Rejali: I’ve been keeping track of how many torturers describe what they do to journalists, academics or doctors. At this point, I’ve counted slightly fewer than 140 cases since World War II—excluding Nazi torturers. It’s not a lot, and it covers only a handful of countries—most of the torturers are Greek, Brazilian, Japanese, Iranian and American from earlier conflicts.

Torturers are not sadists. They are chosen because they are patriotic, loyal and disciplined and can keep secrets.

They do not have dispositions to torture. They are put in situations where torture seems logical, normal and a safe way to proceed.

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

DARK MATTER: Reed College professor Darius Rejali is an expert on torture, whom reporters across the country turned to for context after the release this month of a Senate report on U.S.-sponsored torture after 9/11. “I do not think it helps to think of torturers as aliens, people not like us,” Rejali says. “When we treat torturers as sadistic aliens, we make torture something beyond our ability to address.”

What makes torture “normal”?

[Some well-known experiments] show most of us would torture if put in situations that are without clear authority, have unclear rules, no punishment for violation of rules, and no regular supervision.

For serial violators, these fuzzy backgrounds can be intensified with peer pressure and the fear that if they stopped torturing, they themselves might become victims of the bureaucracy.

“TORTURERS ARE NOT SADISTS. THEY ARE CHOSEN BECAUSE THEY ARE PATRIOTIC, LOYAL AND DISCIPLINED AND CAN KEEP SECRETS.” It sounds as if we should have sympathy for people carrying out the interrogations. Do they have any hope of getting help?

Your question assumes that participating in torture always produces trauma. Actually, this is not the case.

Trauma arises through toxic levels of guilt and shame,

which then generates symptoms we would call post-traumatic stress disorder. No one can anticipate whether they will feel guilt or shame in these cases, or how long it may take for its onset to occur. This is beyond their powers.

A torturer may have no problems for a while, and then one day, things start to change. Torturers with strong ideological or religious commitments have fewer, and sometimes no, difficulties. This does suggest to me that torturers in democratic societies are somewhat more vulnerable to guilt and shame than those from authoritarian societies.

Typically, we justify torture by necessity, generally acknowledging it’s a terrible thing to do. Feeling shame and guilt—particularly when the results are negligible and the costs are high—could be inevitable.

Is PTSD the only problem?

Burnout is a bigger issue. Torture is a labor-intensive activity. Torturers are more exhausted than, say, members of death squads—who have, from the torturer’s perspective, a more dramatic and less demanding occupation.

Unsurprisingly, torturers suffer from insomnia, hypersensitivity, nervousness, emotional problems, alcoholism and potentially suicidal behavior.

An aggravating factor is living in secrecy, deprived

NATIONAL SECURITY of the support and understanding of friends and family.

This sharply contrasts with their supervisors, who do not engage in the violence. Supervisors are able to take pride in their work.

How should Americans view the people who carried out the interrogations?

We tend to forget torture does not happen without context.

It happens within bureaucracies that have many people who don’t torture but who are, whether they like it or not, forced to witness these events.

These include people like guards, but also sometimes secretaries who transcribe interrogation tapes. All of these people may suffer from burnout or trauma. We also know that in some cases, the families of torturers suffer— if not from violence directed at them but later, in terms of the shame that children feel for their parents.

I don’t think many people have thought about the secretaries who transcribe interrogation tapes.

A Tibetan monk, Palden Gyatso, was asked what he feared most while suffering decades of torture in Chinese prisons. He had been incarcerated as a young man and spent most of his life in prison. He said, “What I feared most was that I would lose compassion for my torturers.”

I agree. I do not think it helps to think of torturers as aliens, people not like us, and torture as something so far from our normal lives that we cannot treat torturers as human beings. When we treat torturers as sadistic aliens, we make torture something beyond our ability to address.

Moreover, we dehumanize torturers, and that is always the way to other forms of cruelty.

How do we avoid dehumanizing the people who carry out torture?

I think the important thing is to regard what torturers have in common with us. As I have said, most of us, under

“NEVER SAY YES TO TORTURE. NO ONE WILL EVER THANK YOU FOR IT.”

the right conditions, could be induced to do horrible things.

The more we understand torture as a human problem, the more we can be in a position to address it in a humane way.

What about the people at the top?

We can be proud of children who are raised to be soldiers and policemen, but no one has ever said to me that they want to raise their child to be a torturer. I have sympathy for the torturers, but far less for those who sacrifice other people’s children and order them to torture.

My best advice to those rank-and-fi le officers is, never say yes to torture. No one will ever thank you for it. The people slapping you on the back today will be the first to throw you under the bus tomorrow.

When Chilean torturers left service, they were called manchado by their old friends and colleagues—it means “stained.” These are not the friends that will fund veterans’ services for torturers. They won’t want anyone to know what you did, much less give you treatment for doing it.

NEWS

Can you talk about the effects of interrogation programs on civilian law enforcement agencies?

Torture follows soldiers back from war. After all, if you did security work in a war, what kind of job would you look for when you return? Policing.

And so, unsurprisingly, there is a historical record of torture techniques that appeared on a battlefield that later appear in a neighborhood near you.

How long does it take for the effects of war to reach home?

As near as I can tell, it takes about 10 years for techniques that appear in the battlefront to appear in the home country—a phenomena I call “transference.”

What do you mean by transference?

Transference happened to the French twice in the 20th century, and twice in American history.

The technique we now call “waterboarding” was unknown in American policing until after American soldiers returned from the Philippines in 1905, and by the 1930s it was common throughout the country in police stations large and small.

Americans brought back from the Vietnam War magneto-electrical torture to Chicago in the 1970s, a story well documented in John Conroy’s Unspeakable Acts, Ordinary People. It seems clear now that a group of men under the command of one of Chicago’s top policemen tortured prisoners for nearly 20 years.

So what are your final thoughts about what we’ve learned about the U.S.-sponsored torture the report has revealed?

Torture, then, has a long shadow—in terms of the effects it has on the victims, the torturers and the societies from which they come. We will be dealing with its effects in the United States for a very long time.

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

9

B

BY AA RO N M E SH

amesh@wweek.com

rooke Steger had never met Steve Novick before they attended a September event at the Oregon Rail Heritage Center.

Steger is the regional general manager of Uber, the $41 billion company whose app allows you to summon drivers with the tap of a phone.

Uber had spent nearly two years trying to persuade Portland to change its rules and let the company’s drivers operate here. Novick is the city commissioner in charge of transportation and, as far as Uber was concerned, part of the City Hall roadblock.

Steger walked over to introduce herself. Novick didn’t waste much time on pleasantries.

“It would really help if you would change your name,” Novick recalls telling her. “When I hear ‘Uber,’ my tendency is to think about the Third Reich.”

Steger won’t say how she reacted, but Novick’s hos-

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

tility toward her company signaled the conflict still to come.

Portland appeared unwilling to let anyone trump taxi companies’ control of the city’s car-for-hire industry.

And Uber—a pillar of the so-called “sharing economy” that tries to challenge regulation whenever possible— made clear it intended to bust into the Portland market, regardless of what city officials wanted.

Uber did exactly that Dec. 5, rolling into Portland, flouting the city’s taxi regulations and daring City Hall to throw it out.

The company had used this same strategy elsewhere with success. But in Portland, Uber found a tougher fight than it anticipated. The city sued the company, and by Dec. 18 forced an extraordinary settlement: Uber would retreat from Portland for three months to give city officials time to rewrite the rules that govern Portland’s entrenched taxi industry.

The story behind this deal has not been told before, and it reveals how city officials scrambled to clean up a mess they had made by allowing an archaic and protectionist taxi system to delay the plans of an innovative economic giant.

Make no mistake: Uber won. Its invasion won the company entry into Portland far sooner than if the question had remained pinned down by City Hall inertia.

And the taxi companies—once deemed too powerful to threaten—were left at the curb.

But the deal did far more than prevent Portland, for all its trendy vibe, from acting like a Luddite. Across the country, companies such as Uber threaten to disrupt existing businesses that have had to live under government regulation for decades. They do this by arguing their model is better for consumers—all while ignoring the rules and keeping secret the one thing that gives them true power: data on customers’ habits, purchases

PORTLAND TRIED TO RUN FROM UBER. THEN THE MAYOR GRABBED THE WHEEL. and desires.

The deal between Portland and Uber could change that dynamic for the fi rst time anywhere by making the city the ultimate sharing-economy laboratory: The city will briefly deregulate its taxi business while Uber shares its tightly held data. The goal? To get a true picture of what the Portland car-for-hire world truly looks like.

It could forever change the way sharing-economy companies and government regulators get along. The question is, can City Hall actually make the plan work, or has it already given up too much ground to a global company known less for its willingness to compromise and more for its drive to dominate?

“Uber sees itself as above government regulation,” says Jeff Chester, executive director of the Center for Digital Democracy, a Washington, D.C., nonprofit advocating for consumer protections. “Uber’s refusal to share data with governmental authorities is about evading public scrutiny. If Portland were able to bring Uber to heel, then Portland potentially could in fact create a kind of breakthrough for the rest of the world.”

T

he battle over Uber in Portland started 15 months ago, when Corey Owens came to town. Owens is Uber’s global director of public policy. In September 2013, he appeared before the city board that oversees the car-for-hire businesses. Owens wanted the board to approve a service called UberBlack. The service had proven popular in other cities, where customers can summon a fleet of luxury black sedans and SUVs with a tap of

their smartphones.

Owens told the board Uber would make Portland better. “Consumers get the value of fast, high-quality transportation at the cheapest rate possible,” he told the board.

But the panel Owens was addressing, the Private ForHire Transportation Board of Review, had the reputation of looking out less for consumers than for its own interests.

Half of its members represent drivers or existing transportation companies, including taxis, town cars and limos. The board oversees rules that say newcomers to the car-for-hire business must prove Portland needs more taxis before the city will issue new cab permits. The board has helped cab companies and other car services protect their stake.

What probably concerned the city’s taxi industry was not the UberBlack town-car service but the San Francisco company’s core business, UberX, which allows anyone to turn his or her own car into a de facto taxi.

It’s this service that has made Uber wildly popular around the world, allowing riders to quickly summon cars with an app and, in many cases, allowing drivers to charge lower fares than taxis do.

Uber has faced a backlash for what critics describe as ruthless practices: not covering drivers at all times with commercial insurance, not providing access for people with disabilities, and using “surge pricing” to hike fares when demand goes up. Often, these higher fares violate limits set by cities. (See graphic on page 14.)

That’s what prompted the hostile response Owens got from the taxi board that day. Steve Entler, a board member who also is general manager of Radio Cab, accused Uber of putting the public at risk by “contracting with anyone with four wheels.”

City staff asked skeptical questions about Uber’s plans. Entler later described Owens’ responses as evasive and “Uberspeak.”

After the September 2013 board meeting, Owens took to Uber’s blog with a sarcastic screed against Portland’s insular taxi business and the people protecting it.

“I’m here on behalf of Radio Cab,” Owens wrote, mocking the taxi board, “and I’m asking the board member from Radio Cab to please protect Radio Cab.”

D

avid Bradgon, former Metro Council president, drove a taxi for Broadway Cab in 1999. He says the taxi board has always been stacked to protect the industry.

The board, he says, is run by bureaucrats “who didn’t want to be roused out of their slumber. The protectionist argument was always cloaked with this total baloney about protecting the workers and the consumers. The whole system is set up to screw the workers and the consumers.”

Frank Dufay, the city’s private for-hire transportation manager, says the board doesn’t protect the industries it regulates. But Dufay acknowledges its members someCONT. on page 12

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times look out for their own interests.

“You bring people on the board who are willing to look beyond their little piece of the pie,” Dufay says. “That doesn’t always happen, but that’s the hope.”

The two biggest taxi companies, Radio Cab and Broadway Cab, control 285 of the 460 permits in the city. Between 1998 and 2012, the city added no new taxi permits, leaving Portland with fewer cabs per resident than virtually any city of its size in the nation (see chart on page 13).

With a strict limit on the number of cabs on the street, taxi companies could keep fares steady and competition out.

Over time, however, that grip has weakened. In 2012, thenMayor Sam Adams led the effort to grant 50 taxi permits to Union Cab, a new, driver-owned company backed by the labor union Oregon AFL-CIO. Radio and Broadway cabbies drove around City Hall, laying on their horns nonstop.

The protest didn’t stop the City Council from approving the permits. It shouldn’t have been surprising: On balance, the Oregon AFL-CIO plays a bigger political role—in terms

“WE TAKE OUR CUSTOMER PRIVACY AND OUR DRIVER PRIVACY VERY, VERY SERIOUSLY.” —BROOKE STEGER, UBER GENERAL MANAGER

of campaign contributions and numbers of supporters—than the taxi companies.

Yet the defeat for Broadway, Radio and other taxi companies shattered their sense of invincibility. “Union Cab put a crack in the status quo,” says Hannah Kuhn, who watched the fight as City Commissioner Nick Fish’s chief of staff. “The traditional cab companies lost some influence.”

It wasn’t just that the companies proved to be far less powerful than many had long assumed. It was that Uber—when it wanted something it couldn’t have—didn’t take no for an answer.

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t first, Uber appeared to come at City Hall like most businesses that want something from politicians.

The company hired a Portland lobbyist, Greg Peden of the Gallatin Group, to see whether Mayor Charlie Hales and the other four city commissioners might be willing to buck the taxi board.

Inside City Hall, there was little appetite. The power that taxi companies held turned out to be less about traditional influence: They didn’t contribute a lot of money to campaigns and didn’t hold much political clout. But the companies had made dealing with taxi rules so contentious and nasty that members of the City Council simply wanted to avoid the issue when Uber came knocking.

“It’s a hassle to tackle,” says one City Hall staffer, asking for anonymity because he fears angering other officials. “I’d bring it up, and people would go scurrying like rats.”

The mayor’s office had met once with Uber in July 2013, shortly before the company asked the taxi board for changes.

Hales’ staff told Uber they weren’t on the mayor’s agenda for the next year. “We let Uber know that we had a timetable,” says Hales staffer Josh Alpert, “and we weren’t likely to change that timetable.”

Many companies might push to get on the agenda, or use that time to build relationships at City Hall. Instead, Uber refused to bow to the taxi board and eventually fired its local lobbyist when it couldn’t get immediate action. Rather than continue to press City Hall, Uber simply went away and focused on cities that were welcoming.

Says Steger, the Uber exec whom Novick had greeted with the Nazi reference, “We had to pick where we wanted to put our resources.”

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Portland’s taxi rules protect existing cab companies like Broadway and Radio Cab from competition, and the City Council has not approved many new taxi permits.

The most recent available data shows Portland has ended up with far more people per taxicab than similarly sized cities.

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UBER PRESSURE: Uber recruited Portland drivers like Robert Schultz to operate their own cars as unlicensed cabs. “It’s great fun,” he told WW this month. “The people are so magnetic.”

tomers on social media to badger Portland city officials by tweeting with the hashtag #PDXneedsUber. Thousands did.

In July, Uber execs returned to City Hall, where Hales’ staff told them the city was preparing to begin the process of reviewing taxi rules. But pressure was building: In the fall, Travel Portland, the Oregon Restaurant and Lodging Association, and the Portland Business Alliance all asked City Hall for faster rule changes. Staffers say Columbia Sportswear CEO Tim Boyle repeatedly called Hales’ office to ask why Portland wouldn’t let Uber in.

In October, Uber officials met with Hales and Novick.

This time, Hales pledged the city would start considering new taxi rules no later than January. Uber responded by opening service in Tigard, Beaverton, Hillsboro and Gresham in hopes it would put more pressure on Portland.

Novick says he was serious about taxi reform—and was making calls about rule changes as late as December.

“Uber probably underestimated our commitment to taking a real look at the regulations,” Novick says.

But Uber had a right to be doubtful and impatient.

City Hall had been avoiding the issue long enough. The company worried the process could take months, if not years, assuming the mayor kept his word. The company urged City Hall to speed things up. Steger says she sent an email to Novick on Dec. 1, asking for a timeline.

“I tried to make this clear to the city: There are many different pathways to a solution,” Steger says. “We didn’t hear anything back.”

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S O U R C E S : C I T Y O F P O R T L A N D , U . S . C E N S U S B U R E A U , T L PA TA X I C A B FA C T B O O K .

HARD TO HAIL

CHRISTOPHER ONSTOTT

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ot much happened for several months, until Hales and the rest of the City Council took steps that many saw as hypocrisy.

While keeping Uber out, city officials had all but ignored the operations of another sharing-economy giant, Airbnb, that was operating in Portland but regularly breaking the rules. The company uses its website and app to match customers with local residents willing to offer short-term rentals of their homes and apartments.

Airbnb allowed its hosts to avoid health and safety inspections and lodging taxes—all of which struck the existing hotel business as unfair competition.

Rather than crack down, Hales embraced Airbnb and led the effort to give the company a legitimacy it enjoyed in few other cities. At Hales’ direction, Portland bureaucrats rewrote city rules to effectively allow Airbnb and its hosts to keep operating. Meanwhile, Airbnb agreed to make its hosts undergo inspections and pay lodging taxes.

Airbnb had applied pressure on city officials—records show the company spent $47,000 lobbying City Hall this year. Airbnb sweetened the courtship by announcing in March it would locate 160 jobs and its national call center in Portland. (It’s now 220 jobs.) The deal also looked cozy: Hales’ daughter, Katelyn, was dating Airbnb’s chief mapmaker.

Hales’ stance toward Airbnb confl icted with his attitude toward Uber. Yes, Airbnb had already insinuated itself into the city, which made it more difficult for Hales to kick the company out.

But Hales openly embraced Airbnb’s free-market approach while putting off Uber’s chance to get a full hearing.

Uber officials publicly pointed out the contradictions. “I hope that the city is able to prioritize innovation,” Steger told WW in July, “especially after they welcomed Airbnb.”

The company then launched a strategy to put heat on Hales and others in City Hall. In July, Uber launched its service in Vancouver, Wash. Uber drivers could drop off fares in Portland but not pick them up there—and that generated frustration among customers who were discovering the new service.

The company crowdsourced outrage. It urged cus-

n Dec. 4, Hales got a call from David Plouffe, Uber’s senior vice president of policy and strategy. Plouffe ran Barack Obama’s upstart 2008 presidential campaign, then spent two years as a senior White House adviser. Uber looked on its city-by-city effort to overcome regulators as if it were a political campaign and in August hired Plouffe for his expertise.

But when Plouffe called the mayor, Hales was stuck in a land-use hearing. Plouffe left a message telling Hales he had news but was vague about what it was. Hales didn’t call him back right away.

The news Hales didn’t take time to hear was startling: Uber had waited long enough and would simply roll into Portland the next day, without regard to what

city rules said.

Uber started calling select reporters Dec. 5 with a heads-up that the company would launch operations in Portland at 5 pm. Novick learned of Uber’s invasion from Oregonian reporter Joseph Rose, and then sent word to Hales.

Hales went to Novick’s office, dialed Plouffe back and put the call on his cellphone’s speaker. According to Hales and two of his staffers, Plouffe and the mayor opened with small talk before Hales got to the point.

“David,” Hales said, “we’ve heard some rather disturbing news.”

Plouffe stalled and evaded the issue. (“He said a lot of words,” Hales told WW later. “But there wasn’t a great deal of content.”) Hales held the cellphone flat in his hand, staffers huddled around him, and Novick yelled into the phone.

“If you come in and break the law,” Novick recalls saying, “we’ll throw the book at you!”

“I hoped we could have been civil with each other,” Plouffe said.

“Announcing you’re going to start breaking the law,” Novick replied, “is not civil.”

Uber’s Steger says today Plouffe and company executives were taken aback at the hostile response. Other cities—Seattle, Miami and Austin, Texas—had been far more pliable when Uber pushed its way in.

But Portland officials were furious. “I just couldn’t stand the idea they get to write their own rules,” Hales says now.

Within hours, Uber drivers, who had been contracted through Craigslist and Facebook posts, were picking up Portland customers. Novick staged what amount to a tantrum, promising sanctions and telling The New York Times that Uber “seems like a bunch of thugs.” The city sued Uber three days later, asking a judge for an injunction that barred the company from operating here.

But the city’s crackdown otherwise fizzled. Transportation officials sent 16 fines to Uber totaling $67,750—but they never fined a driver, and discovered they probably didn’t have the legal authority to tow cars as they had threatened to do (“Drivers, Wanted,” WW, Dec. 17, 2014).

Both sides were stuck.

CONT. on page 14 Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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FEW UBER ALLIES Like Audrey II, the talking plant in Little Shop of Horrors, the car-sharing-app company Uber does two things: grow and devour.

In five years, it has expanded to 247 cities in 53 countries.

But also like Audrey II, it hasn’t kept many friends.

Nearly everywhere Uber lands, it has picked fights—what CEO Travis Kalanick calls “principled confrontation”—with existing taxi companies and regulators.

But criticism of the company has recently intensified after

bad PR—including two rape accusations, a raft of lawsuits and bans in three countries.

In many cities, Uber has faced five major criticisms: that the company doesn’t require drivers to carry adequate insurance, doesn’t perform sufficient background checks on its drivers, hasn’t guaranteed service to customers with disabilities, gouges customers with its market-demand pricing, and kills competition from other taxi services.

Here’s what the Uber battlefield looks like:

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1. SAN FRANCISCO An Uber driver struck and killed a 6-year-old girl as she crossed the street on New Year’s Eve in 2013. The girl’s family sued Uber for wrongful death. But the company says its insurance doesn’t cover the killing— because the driver is an independent contractor and wasn’t carrying or picking up an Uber customer at the time.

SAN FRANCISCO The company faces legal action after a driver in September allegedly attacked a passenger with a hammer.

2. SACRAMENTO, CALIF. The local chapter of the National Federation for the Blind sued Uber on Sept.

8, charging the company with refusing to serve more than 30 blind customers because drivers didn’t want to transport their service animals. One allegation: An Uber driver stuffed one guide dog in a car trunk—then refused to pull over when the woman realized where her dog was.

14

3. LOS ANGELES The county district attorney sued Uber on Dec. 9 for misleading consumers “regarding the quality of the background checks.”

4. LAS VEGAS A judge’s order kicked Uber out of Nevada in November, as cab companies fought to protect their turf.

5. PHOENIX Arizona officials have hit 61 ride-sharing drivers with $2,700 fines for allegedly not carrying insurance.

6. HOUSTON Three wheelchair users sued Uber in June for not having enough disabled-access vehicles.

7. CHICAGO Uber removed a driver Dec. 10 after a passenger accused him of sexually assaulting her.

8. NEW YORK CITY After surge pricing pushed minimum charges to $175 per trip during a 2013

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

snowstorm, Uber promised the state attorney general it would cap fare increases during weather disasters.

on government background checks in India. Uber’s top officials pledged to toughen driver screening worldwide.

9. BOSTON An Uber driver was charged Dec. 18 with raping a passenger.

13. THAILAND National regulators banned Uber this month, citing a lack of insurance.

10. MADRID A judge ruled Dec. 9 that Uber must stop operating in Spain, because it poses illegal competition to existing cab companies.

The Madrid taxi association plans to file a lawsuit to keep Uber out for good.

14. SYDNEY When Islamic extremists held customers at a downtown cafe hostage Dec. 8, Uber used surge pricing to jack up its fares fourfold to a minimum of $100 per trip.

Critics worldwide decried Uber’s price gouging during the crisis.

11. GERMANY Uber was briefly banned nationwide this fall after a taxi-company lawsuit.

12. DELHI Government officials banned Uber in the Delhi region Dec. 8 after an Uber driver was detained on suspicion of raping a female passenger.

The driver had been previously accused of rape in 2011. Uber managers told media the company relies

15. SEOUL South Korean officials on Dec. 24 indicted Uber CEO Travis Kalanick for illegally operating rental cars as taxis.

If convicted, he could face up to two years in prison.

SOURCES: SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE, BLOOMBERG, SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS, LAS VEGAS REVIEW-JOURNAL, KTVK PHOENIX, COURTHOUSE NEWS SERVICE, CHICAGO TRIBUNE, THE B OSTO N G LO B E , T H E N E W YO R K T I M E S , THE GUARDIAN, LOS ANGELES TIMES.

n Dec. 13, a Saturday, Ha les, Novick and three staffers sat down at a dining-room table in the Eastmoreland home of political consultant Mark Wiener. Wiener had helped get Hales and Novick elected, and Uber officials turned to him to see if he might broker a deal. Across the table sat Steger, the Uber general manager, and Caitlin O’Neill, a company policy adviser.

Hales insisted Uber stop operating in Portland in violation of the law. “I have a pretty well-attuned bullshit meter,” Hales told WW later. “And when somebody’s bluffing, which I believe Uber was, I’ve got a little bit of life experience that helps inform me on that.”

But Hales knew his leverage was limited: Uber was big and persistent enough that, eventually, the company could push itself into the city one way or another.

Novick had given the city no route of retreat. And there was no guarantee a judge would block Uber.

Uber was also worried, but for the opposite reason. A judge in Nevada had blocked its operations there. No matter how a judge ruled, the company would still have to deal with city officials who were now irate at its tactics.

According to Hales, Uber officials apologized and agreed to give the city breathing room by getting out of town until April 9. By that time, Hales said, the city would make some of Uber’s operations legal.

“We’ve never paused a market,” Steger says, “but I really saw this as a special case.”

T

he dilemma created by City Hall’s intransigence toward Uber ended up giving Hales a lucky break: He got the chance to demonstrate leadership and political skills often missing from his first two years in office. Hales managed to hold Airbnb and Uber, two sharing-economy companies, to different standards and still appear to have brokered a working deal that allowed Uber into the city.

What’s less clear is whether Novick helped or hurt the city ’s efforts. His attempt to crack down on Uber failed, but his belligerence toward Uber helped convince the company it needed to find a compromise.

In the end, Novick remained combative toward Uber, dickered over details and insisted his name be taken off the press release announcing the deal.

Iron ic a l ly, t he delays created by Novick’s resistance helped create the real innovation in the Uber deal. Novick had argued the city couldn’t change the rules for Uber without also changing the rules for existing taxi companies. This got Hales aide Josh Alpert wondering: How could the city actually measure the competing claims of Uber and the taxi companies that each offered customers a better deal?

The answer: The Portland cab market, once tightly controlled, is being blown wide open in an experiment Novick dubs “Taxis Gone Wild.”

Starting in April, the city will for two months drop two major rules governing taxis: how many can operate at any one time, and what taxis can charge customers.

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PLAYING FARE: Mayor Charlie Hales wants to assure cab drivers they can make a living with Uber in town.

“To just cast them aside and say, ‘Woo-hoo, I love this app,’ that’s not the right answer,” he says.

“I JUST COULDN’T STAND THE IDEA THEY GET TO WRITE THEIR OWN RULES.” —CHARLIE HALES Uber and its biggest competitor, Lyft, can also operate. But Hales says the companies will be asked to supply the city with data on where they’re picking up and dropping off passengers, and how much they’re charging.

“People tell us anecdotes about waiting two hours for a cab,” Hales says. “Facts will be friendly, and data will be helpful.”

But that’s the real test for Hales’ deal: Will Uber share information about how it makes its money?

Big data is what makes sharing-economy companies powerful, and they loathe giving it up. Controlling information about where people are summoning rides, or where they want to rent houses, is the basis of their business model. City Hall is currently fighting Airbnb over supplying the addresses of its hosts, most of whom have so far refused to undergo safety inspections.

Steger says Uber is willing to give Portland information—to a point. “We take our customer privacy and our driver privacy very, very seriously,” she says.

Chester, of the Center for Digital Democracy, is skeptical Uber will give the city the data that really matters.

“Uber is acting more like a secretive anti-government organization than a commercial business,” he says, “but it’s a double-edged sword. You’re talking about the legitimate right of government authorities to look at data. On the other hand, government looking at private data is troubling.”

One thing is certain: The cab business will never go back to what it once was.

During his talks with Uber, Hales never once bothered to tell Radio Cab or Broadway Cab what was happening—a sign the companies’ clout is all but gone.

“We didn’t make up the rules,” says Radio Cab’s Entler, who criticized the Uber exec at the city’s taxi board meeting more than a year ago. “They made up the rules. And for them to change it—to accommodate criminals—seems a little strange to me. And indicates to me that maybe I’ve lived a little too long.”

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17

CULTURE

snow report courtesy of oN3P

CRUD BUSTERS ON3P’S SKIS ARE HANDMADE AND BUILT FOR HEAVY POWDER.

By M a rt i n C i z M a r

mcizmar@wweek.com

The whole thing started with a big letdown.

Scott Andrus was stoked to get his new skis, an $800 pair of Canadian-made Capitals. He waited three months. They finally arrived stiff and planky.

“I really wanted to like them, but after about five days on them, I just realized they were not the skis for me,” he says. “I decided I could do it better.”

That ’s big ta lk for a ca r penter or engineer, let alone a 19-year-old premed student at the University of Puget Sound who’d never built anything bigger than a skate ramp.

“I can’t remember the moment when I decided, ‘OK, I’m going to do this,’” Andrus says. “I ended up buying the steel for a ski press, which is about a grand, and at that point I was committed.”

Using that press, Andrus and his friends made 52 pairs of skis in his garage in Tacoma, Wash. While pressing wood and plastic together, Andrus also planned the company that became Portland’s ON3P. Eight years later, Andrus, 28, is operating one of only a handful of U.S. companies building skis from scratch.

At ON3P’s no-frills factory in Rose City Park—there’s a keg of Lagunitas Pils for afterwork beers, and a backroom with a weight bench and the “The Condo” tagged above the door—Andrus and his eight full-time employees will crank out about 1,400 pairs of skis this year. There are a dozen models of double-rockered fatties that can power through Oregon’s powder pours and the Cascadian crud that later sets up in its place.

“The learning curve was steep,” Andrus says. “What I learned in Tacoma didn’t necessarily translate to full-scale production. But at this point, I’m pretty confident in our product and I think we make skis that can go up against anybody.”

That’s not just big talk, at least based on my Sunday of skiing at Mount Hood Meadows, on a borrowed pair of ON3P’s all-mountain model, the Kartel 98, which handled a huge dump of heavy powder with buttery-smooth grace.

“We didn’t consciously say, ‘We’re going to build a Northwest ski,’ because the majority of our sales are outside the area,” Andrus says. “But I’m sure subconsciously it has some influence. When we’re testing, we’re up here on the heavier snow. You need a ski that can punch through stuff.”

To understand ON3P skis, and the whole style of hefty, wide and rockered skis, you have to start with the Spatula. For Port18

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

hood ready: ryan Burt finishing a pair of oN3P skis.

landers, it’s worth learning about, because unlike so many silly ski trends, the Spatula matters in Oregon, where heavy snow falls and rarely encounters a ’cat. If Steamboat Springs offers flutes of Champagne powder, Mount Hood pours from a pony keg of milkshake-thick and barely bubbly nitro stout.

I’ve been skiing since I was 5, from Vermont to Arizona, without ever encountering anything like a typical midwinter day in Oregon. My first day on Hood was a snowstorm with 20-feet visibility and mogul-sized piles of chopped powder that slowly moved across the mountain’s face in the wind. Either I’d forgotten how to ski in the offseason, I figured, or everyone else on the slopes was insane.

ON3P’s Andrus, originally from Boulder, Colo., had a similar—if more muted—reaction. And he discovered the same thing I did, which is that if you’re going to ski in Oregon, “There’s no question you need a rocker here; it’s just too manky.”

Rockered skis are shaped like the bottom of a rocking chair, floating through powder and helping the edges slide smoothly without catching. To my mind, everyone skiing in Oregon without rockered skis is crazy. That’s where the Volant Spatula comes in.

Back in 2002, a pro skier named Shane McConkey wanted a new type of powder ski. Fresh powder behaves more like water than groomed snow, he reasoned, so the ski should be more like a water ski than the then-dominant parabolic skis.

Parabolic skis are a testament to the power of superior design. In 1992, skis were thin and relatively straight, with a slight inward taper over the boot. In 1993, Elan introduced a ski with a wider tip and a more pronounced taper, called the “Sidecut Extreme.” Within five years, no one made anything else. The design allows novices to carve smooth turns that used to take years to learn. I’m 34, and anyone younger just calls them “skis.” The only problem was powder, where skis built to carve up a groomer are a jelly-legged nightmare. And

yet, in Sunday’s heavy snow, the first big day of the season at Meadows, about half the skiers waiting for the lift were still on traditional-shaped skis. You might as well wear leather boots.

“I ow ned the Spatula in college,” A nd r u s says. “ I spent some pret t y scary days on Spatulas when I probably shouldn’t have been on them, because they were fun. But it was like, ‘Oh my God, I’m not slowing down.’”

McConkey’s extreme design solved the powder problem. From a distance, the skis looked like water skis, flared out to be wider below the boot than at the tips. Built with both the tip and tail-bend up, the lowest part of the Spatula was under the boot.

“there’s No questioN you Need a rocker here; it’s just too maNky.” —Scott andruS They couldn’t carve well, but they floated like a cloud. Rather than slice turns, you slid into them—like spreading butter. In powder, they were aces. On groomers, they were awkward. On ice, they were certain death.

When it came time to build his own ON3P skis, Andrus “wanted a ski that smeared like the Spatula when you wanted to, but was drivable, so you could actually hold a turn.” His model borrowed the raised tails and tips of the Spatula, but had a flat side, so it could carve into groomed snow.

That’s not unique now, of course—the same basic shape put companies like Line and Armada on the map, and it’s used by everyone from Blizzard to Fischer.

But those companies aren’t building skis in-house, by hand.

The ON3P factory sits around the corner from the Oregon Catholic Press and a company that makes coffee-cup jackets.

Before visiting, you are required to sign a waiver agreeing not to steal the homebrewed trade secrets—very few people are making skis on this scale anywhere in the world, and Andrus and his team have come up with a number of techniques they’d like to keep to themselves, including one trick using an old fire hose. Andrus starts and ends the visit in his office, which has a bar cart that’s well-stocked but rarely used and a wall lined with sneakers. Inside, everyone on the crew wears Bluetooth headphones.

“We’ve always believed in building your own product,” Andrus says. “That was a thing from the start—we wanted to have a ski that was ours from start to finish, not just the design process.”

It takes about four hours to make a pair of ON3P skis, starting with cutting the core and ending with peeling the protective layer off the top sheet. Andrus is proudest of the all-bamboo core, which costs three times as much as a blend of woods, but which gives the skis the “damp” feeling he’s looking for, and edges far thicker than the industry standard, and built to last.

The average price is about $700 a pair.

This strikes me as oddly reasonable, since they’re only about $100 more than a similar model from Rossignol.

“Our cost per pair is probably double what K2’s is, but we have to sell them for the same price, basically,” Andrus says.

Cyclists pay $3,500 for a complete Portland-built Breadwinner bike that’s fairly comparable to a $1,700 Salsa Vaya, but it turns out few people are willing to pay $1,200 for skis.

“It can be frustrating,” Andrus says, “because sometimes people say, ‘I can’t afford your skis,’ and it’s like, ‘OK, you can spend $500 and get a park ski made in China—worse materials, lower build quality, lower quality finish—or you can spend $100 more for a ski that’s going to last twice as long, built by people who give a shit.’”

Which, sure, is great. For me, it’s just nice to have sticks that can handle Hood.

STREET

BEST OF STREET OUR FAVORITE SNAPSHOTS OF 2014.

Photos by b r ia n a cer ezo, Katie Den n is a n D Ken ton Wa ltz wweek.com/street

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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SNOW REPORT: ON3P’s Portlandy skis.

FOOD: Revisiting the year’s reviews.

MUSIC: Previewing promising 2015 albums.

MOVIES: Alex Cox of Repo Man is coming to town.

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SCOOP W W S TA F F

HAPPY TRADING DOUGHNUTS FOR DOGS. HOP TO IT: Katie Poppe and Micah Camden (Little Big Burger, Son of a Biscuit, Blue Star Donuts) have a new fast-food concept in the works. Hop Dog will serve beer-boiled hot dogs—hence the “hop”—with plans for classic beef dogs, Chicago dogs, a Greek lamb dog, and a chili dog on the menu. No lease has been signed, but they’re currently looking at a location in the West End across from Jake’s Famous Crawfish on Southwest 12th Avenue. >> Meanwhile, the owners of Splash Bar, a beach-themed dance club in the Pearl District, have applied for a liquor license to convert the location to a brewery and bar called Squealers Brewing, with pinball and karaoke.

ROE IT OVER: Yet another San Francisco tech company is on its way to Portland—although this one’s unlikely to cause any trouble with City Commissioner Steve Novick. Caviar, a restaurant-food delivery service, will begin operating in Portland as early as February. The company is advertising for a “courier growth associate” and “restaurant growth associate.” Judging from menus in Seattle and San Francisco, the company delivers meals from restaurants that don’t offer delivery for about a $1 to $2 premium on each dish.

BUSY FOR THE INTERVIEW: Kim Jong-un may have helped the Hollywood Theatre log its best weekend ever. After Sony at first canceled and then allowed limited release of The Interview—the Seth Rogen-James Franco farce about assassinating the North Korean dictator— the Hollywood was among 331 independent theaters across the U.S. to snag the film. According to head programmer Dan Halsted, the 9:45 pm screening on Christmas Day THE INTERVIEW was sold out, and the rest of the weekend showings were packed as well, with about 1,900 tickets sold over four days. “It was our busiest weekend on record,” Halsted says—though he adds that Wild, based on Portlander Cheryl Strayed’s memoir about hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, slightly outgrossed The Interview.

Living Room Theaters also showed The Interview, selling out all screenings Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Nationwide, The Interview made about $3 million at the box office—and $15 million online.

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S O N Y E N T E R TA I N M E N T

BLAZER FOOD: The Trail Blazers’ organization somewhat routinely asks Blazers players questions we don’t really need the answers to, but this time it got interesting. What restaurants do the Blazers prefer? The most-favored restaurant among giant men is apparently Portland City Grill—it was the favorite of three Blazers—while Argentine meat house Ox got nods from Joel Freeland and Meyers Leonard. C.J. McCollum apparently made it out to Tasty n Sons. Our favorite answer, however, belonged to Robin Lopez, who immediately and smilingly said, “I love Papa Haydn.”

HEADOUT JEff drEW

WILLAMETTE WEEK

What to do this Week in arts & culture

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 31 Magic garden’s Last night [Nudity] Owner Everett Moore promises “hats, horns, girls, music and everything that comes along with that.” toast the end of this classic strip club, and tip Patty extra well. Magic Garden, 217 NW 4th Ave., 224-8472. Free entry. 21+. new schooL party [bEEr] beer party! there will be Oakshire Hellshire iV, beers from upright, the Commons and block 15, plus food from chef Paul Kasten, formerly of Wildwood, who’s about to launch a venture in Southeast Portland. Bazi Bierbrasserie, 1522 SE 32nd Ave., 234-8888, bazipdx.com. 7 pm-1 am. 21+.

Les sins [iNdiE daNCE] Multi-instrumentalist Chaz bundick (toro y Moi) introduces his new solo project, Les Sins, which sounds like his old act, only with dancier beats. Portland’s moribund electronic music scene gets an accomplished artist for the night.

Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 2397639, holocene.org. 8 pm. $25 at door. 21+.

LuMbertwink [Party] Gay-centric dance party Lumbertwink appeals to lumbersexuals, obviously. Put on that red plaid flannel, oil that beard, and lace up those danners. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 841-6734, funhouselounge.com. 8 pm-2 am. $10, $6 in plaid or union suit.

Jai ho! [bOLLyWOOd] What better way to ring in the new year than with a bollywood dance party? don’t worry if you don’t know what to do—there’s a dance lesson at 10 pm. Alhambra Theatre, 4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 610-0640, alhambrapdx.com. 8 pm. $15-$20. 21+.

THURSDAY JAN. 1 the great dictator [MOViES] the Clinton Street really wanted to show The Interview—“to stand in solidarity with other art houses around the country that are trying to take a stand against suppression of speech and creative expression,” says programmer Lani Jo Leigh. but the theater didn’t have the right equipment. So here’s some Charlie Chaplin instead. Clinton Street Theater, 2522 SE Clinton St., 238-5588, cstpdx.com. 10:30 am; 1, 3:30, 6 and 8:30 pm. $5.

SUNDAY JAN. 4

• darrEN WiLSON • b a N d Wa G O N P O r t L a N d S E a H aW K S fa N S • yO u r u S E L E SS CO L L E G E diPLOMa • biLL COSby

• StrEEt fEE • biLL SiMMONS aNd GOLf PuttEr • KiM JONG-uN • MitCH MCCONNELL

• S K at E b O a r d E r K i d W H O PiSSEd iN tHE rESErVOir • dONaLd StErLiNG • EbOLa • bOKO HaraM • iSiS

• GErMaNy WiNNiNG WOrLd CuP • MiCHaEL JaCKSON HOLOGraM • FrozEN SOuNdtraCK • SHia LabEOuf • Wa S H i N G tO N r E d S K i N S

• r ay r i C E • adriaN PEtErSON • u 2 H aC K i N G yO u r i t u N E S • P H a r r E L L W i L L i a M S ’ H at • a a L i ya H L i f E t i M E M O V i E

controL yourseLf: a showcase of funny [COMEdy] in one year, comic Joann Schinderle—a Midwest transplant with an engaging, effervescent style—has built her twice-monthly showcase into one of Portland’s prime spots to catch standup. tonight, the show celebrates its first birthday with sets from Curtis Cook, amy Miller and Sean Jordan, as well as some special Skype guests.

Alberta Street Pub, 1036 NE Alberta St., 284-7665, albertastreetpub.com.

9 pm. Free. 21+.

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FOOD & DRINK

Monday–Saturday 4–6pm & 8pm–close

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= WW Pick.

Highly recommended.

c o u rtesy o f new city kitc h en

Happy Hour

By Matthew Korfhage.

Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

EN

Wednesday, Dec. 31 New School 5th Anniversary

Walk-Up Window 11am - 2pm

La Calaca Comelona 2304 SE Belmont | 503-239-9675 4-10pm Mon–Sat

WWEEK.COM MOBILE SITE

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If you care about hops and barley, this is probably the best place you could be on New Year’s Eve: 10 taps of rare beer, plus food from notoriously beer-happy ex-Wildwood chef Paul Kasten. Bazi Bierbrasserie, 1522 SE 32nd Ave., 234-8888. 7 pm-1 am. $5 entry. 21+.

Cocotte NYE Dinner

French-style bistro Cocotte promises Champagne and noisemakers, but also Shigoku oysters with mustard seed and fennel pollen, foie-gras scallop surf ’n’ turf, a dish with both black and salt cod, and moulard duck breast. Cocotte, 2930 NE Killingsworth St., 227-2669.

Seatings at 6 and 8:45 pm. $68-$75.

New City Kitchen Second chances don’t come easy, and there are plenty of reasons you might need one. Maybe you made some bad decisions, or maybe the recent near-Depression plunged you into the economy’s cracks. But if you fall out of the job market long enough, it’s hard to climb back in.

New City Kitchen is designed to remedy this, and also serve a damn good pastrami sandwich. “I was a stay-at-home mom for 10 years, I got into a little bit of trouble, and it gave me a criminal background,” says Misty Koch, an assistant manager at New City.

“Three weeks into the six-week program, I got a job offer at Burgerville. But I finished the program first.”

After an internship, New City Kitchen employees are paid competitive wages to work in a catering, takeout and delivery kitchen offering box or bag lunches with salad rolls or sandwiches from ham to muffuletta. “But our goal is to give our best employees away,” says director Paul Schroeder. The kitchen has a standing relationship with Gustav’s and Old Spaghetti Factory, and one of their graduates just signed on at Clarklewis. The program started in 2011, but since November you can now order a sandwich out of its new kitchen at Bud Clark Commons in Old Town.

So how are the sandwiches? Pretty good. The best is the deliciously meaty pastrami on thick, grainy rye, served with dill pickle and a light Russian dressing, followed by the salami-turkeyprovolone muffuletta on fluffy baguette. All are available in a bare-bones bag or box lunch ($11) that includes pasta salad, yogurt parfait and a pair of cookies. Just know it takes an order two days in advance, and the pickup system is still a little haphazard, making it most suitable for delivered group lunches. So far, they deliver mostly to area nonprofits such as churches and the Cascade AIDS Project. Need an extra reason to feel warm and fuzzy about your lunch order? It arrives, of course, by bicycle.

MATTHEW KORFHAGE.

Pix Midnight Chocolate Buffet

It’s time to start thinking about what the last thing you want to eat in 2014 will be. May we suggest a free chocolate buffet of mousse and truffle and ice cream and God knows, paired with Pix’s sizable Champagne selection? The chocolate is free with a beverage purchase. Pix Patisserie, 2225 E Burnside St., 971-271-7166.

• BREAKING NEWS • GEO-LOCATING BAR AND RESTAURANT REVIEWS • CITY GUIDES

BarFly Bus and Ball

BarFly will augment its 15 years of speeding drunks around the city on New Year’s with a BarFly Ball.

There will be Champagne toasts, allyou-can-eat Voodoo doughnuts, a balloon “artiste,” and a photo booth filled with props. Reservations required. Refuge, 116 SE Yamhill St. 7 am-4 am. $45 bus and ball, $35 ball only. 21+.

Shandong www.shandongportland.com

Where to eat this week.

1. Stella Taco

2940 NE Alberta St., 971-407-3705, stellatacopdx.com.

Alberta’s new taqueria charms with killer brisket tacos, a wide selection of margaritas and a pea-soup-green salsa that may melt your face. $.

Shandong

2. Smallwares

4605 NE Fremont St., 971-229-0995, smallwarespdx.com.

Smallwares brings Portland a new baddest brunch—in the Jacksonian sense. Ever had ramen for breakfast? $$.

www.shandongportland.com

eat: New City Kitchen, 655 NW Hoyt St., 971-277-5274, newcitykitchen.com. Pickup or delivery 7 am-7:30 pm Monday-Friday.

drank

Southeast 33rd Avenue and Hawthorne Boulevard, 502-4428, umaipdx.com.

This tucked-away ramen cart mixes the natural saltiness of its soup with tender pulled-pork shoulder to create a sort of light-headed ecstasy amid probable brain dehydration.

But the best part is the flavorful, al dente cart-made noodles. $.

4. Haan Ghin

Jobs for the Food and Drink Industry Staffing solutions for owners and managers

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5. HK Cafe

4410 SE 82nd Ave., 771-8866, facebook.com/pages/HK-Cafe.

“Now you know where to go for Chinese food and u will come back soon because quality and price is best in town,” says this dim sum shop’s Facebook page. This is all 100 percent true. $.

NYC/ CHI/ SFO/ SEA /PDX/ AUS

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Southwest Park Avenue and Harrison Street (on PSU campus).

Haan Ghin’s trademark mii gai is a brilliant mash-up of flavor and texture: a sweet-sour egg noodle vermicelli with chicken, spiced with chili oil and crisped up with fried shallot and chicken skin. $.

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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J o s h u a C h a ng & t h e S E W ine C o l l ective

3. Umai

Crémant de Portland Brut Urbanique (Division) For such an approachable sparkling wine, Division Winemaking’s newly released 2013 Crémant de Portland Brut Urbanique has quite the name.

Crémant is made outside of Champagne but using the French region’s famous techniques, and is often creamier, with bubbles that are larger and slower.

Division’s new sparkler has some pop, but also surprising depth. It’s half old-vine chenin blanc blended with Oregon-grown cabernet franc and gamay noir.

If some Champagne reminds you of licking an ice pick, this is relatively supple, rich and a little farmy, with some peach and candied ginger notes. The current disgorgement measures out at a brutish 8 grams of sugar per liter. And Urbanique? Well, that’s made up. At $26, these bottles won’t last long given the national attention Division has gotten lately. You know about it only because I already have a bottle chilling until midnight. Have a happy one. Recommended. MARTIN CIZMAR.

FOOD & DRINK review

ronitphoto.com, Christine Dong

turn the page REVISITING THE RESTAURANTS THAT LEFT US WONDERING OVER THE PAST 12 MONTHS. One of the big secrets of the food-review business: After making three or four visits in quick succession, even the best restaurants look good in the rearview. Actually, the spots we’re most eager to return to aren’t the best, but the ones that left us wondering. This week, we returned to see what happened to the places we were most curious about from the past year. MARTIN CIZMAR AND MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Son of a Biscuit 2045 SE Division St., 971-888-5933, sonofabiscuit.com.

Date: Aug. 1 The pitch: Nashville-style hot fried chicken from Little Big Burger’s Micah Camden.

Issue: “Biscuit ’s ‘Nashville-style hot chicken’ is the equivalent of ‘New Yorkstyle pizza’ at an East Tennessee gas station…. I pleaded for ‘extra-hot’ on my third visit to Son of a Biscuit, and got Popeyes spiciness.”

Now: Well, it’s oranger, anyway. Son of a Biscuit has added an “extra spicy” option as part of its series of minor tweaks (emo music?), and the chicken actually might be better (moister inside, crisper outside), but it’s still not spicy. There’s a rich color, but the spice comes from a paprika-like warmth. This still ain’t Nashville.

consisted of oversalted jerky, drier than the bones they were attached to. Utter rib failure.”

Now: Whole different rib game. For one, Reverend’s has moved to a St. Louis cut, obviating previous issues w ith trimming. The ribs are meatier, and that salty charcoal is gone. They could still use a little more moisture, but all in all, a 100 percent turnaround. When the smoky and rich ribs are paired with maybe the best collard greens in town, it’s on the level of other solid ’cue spots like Slabtown Ribs or Leroy’s Familiar Vittles, even if still far below Podnah’s Pit or Smokehouse 21. The brisket—lamented in our pages for being too fatty back in May—was decent but a little dry. Go figure.

Eb & Bean 1425 NE Broadway, 281-6081, ebandbean.com.

Date: Aug. 5 The pitch: Organic and locally sourced froyo and toppings in a sleek, modern space.

Issue: “The only problem is the froyo, which lacks the flavor punch we’ve been conditioned to expect in a dessert. Everything we tried was surprisingly tepid in flavor.”

Now: Much improved. This Lloyd District froyo shop has bettered everything in the past six months, starting with the toppings, which include a cold-brew coffee and bourbon sauce that along with whipped cream, butterscotch crumbles and cocoa-rich froyo made a late push toward being one of our favorite desserts of the year. But it’s the new froyo flavors that most impressed, including a weird and wonderful version of a non-dairy linzer cookie froyo—a complex blend of hazelnut, raspberry and cinnamon.

Baerlic Brewing 2235 SE 11th Ave., 477-9418, baerlicbrewing.com.

Date: July 30 The pitch: New brewery on Southeast 11th Avenue.

Issue: “I’ve been able to taste only five beers in two visits, the best of which was an ultra-hoppy Primeval Brown Ale. The crowd was thinner the second time, too, perhaps because people are holding out for fresh batches of coffee stout and IPA. In the meantime, Baerlic might consider biting the bullet and putting some guest beers on tap.”

Now: They’ve got a full lineup of 10 beers, including more ambitious offerings like an oatmeal Pilsner, a beechwood-aged version of Arctos Northwest Winter Ale, and a dry-hopped barleywine. The Primeval is still the best thing on the board, though.

Reverend’s BBQ 7712 SE 13th Ave., 327-8755, reverendsbbq.com.

Date: May 21 and June 18 The pitch: The team behind the excellent Laurelhurst Market steakhouse does barbecue in dining-starved Sellwood.

Issue: “Ribs whose right sides consisted of dripping piles of fat, and whose left

BTU Brasserie 5846 NE Sandy Blvd., 971-407-3429, btupdx.com.

Date: Oct. 8 The pitch: A brewpub with Szechuan food.

Issue: “The first in-house [beer] offering, Out for a Rip IPA, was finally tapped last week. It gets a rip: It was far too sweet and tasted a bit like the juice from canned

REVEREND’s BBQ

FAT HEAD’S

corn…. More of a concern is the absurd mildness of the Szechuan dishes. On the last of my four visits, I pleaded for heat in the Szechuan chicken, dan dan noodles and mapo tofu and was told I’d get it.

Each would pass for mild at Lucky Strike or Szechuan Chef, and are likely to disappoint pepper heads.”

Now: Better across the board, though still not soaring. The beer list has been rounded out to include the excellent Rusty’s Red and a clean lager made with Chinese short-grain rice. The IPA isn’t particularly strong, but it’s much improved. The Szechuan chicken, meanwhile, came out relatively spicy on request, in a smoky sauce with a heavy dose of earthy peppercorns.

It’s not what you’ll get from Chinese-run Szechuan restaurants, but it’s got greater depth than it did before.

Bridge City Pizza 5412 SE Woodstock Blvd., 777-4992, bridgecitypizza.com.

Date: July 22 The pitch: Chicago-style thin-crust pizza and Italian beef.

Issue: The Italian beef was the best we ever expect to have in Portland—“wetter than an otter’s pocket, chock-full of meat and jus that they prep for days”—but we just plain didn’t try the pizza.

Now: Well, stick to that killer Italian beef.

The pizza’s crust is thin and cut in squares, but it’s nowhere near as crisp as the Chicagoland classic. It’s a little doughy, like a Northwest pizzeria slice. And where you’d expect that classic overloaded cheese char in the South Side pie, you instead get sparse cheese floating in thin marinara.

Maybe they make pies like this somewhere in Chicago, but nowhere we know.

Fat Head’s 131 NW 13th Ave., 820-7721, fatheadsportland.com.

Date: Nov. 19 The pitch: Suburban Cleveland’s muchawarded brewpub opens a place in the

Pearl, promising a sought-after IPA. Issue: “The taps haven’t yet poured the flagship Head Hunter IPA—a revelation in North Olmsted, Ohio, though hardpressed to rank among Oregon’s top 10 IPAs—but it’s already becoming one of the Pearl’s more pleasant bars.”

Now: Well, they have the IPA. Head Hunter is gooey sweet, with a hoppy bite that latches onto your tongue like a bear trap— which a lot of people love. Then again, the week’s batches may have been running a little sweet, because the Alpenglow weizenbock that impressed on our first visit was unbalanced this time. The sandwiches are still big and sloppy.

Trifecta 726 SE 6th Ave., 841-6675, trifectapdx.com.

Date: Jan. 22 The pitch: Ken Forkish of artisan bread and pizza fame hires Higgins sous chef Rich Meyer and opens a Frenchy tavern in the former Spike’s Auto Upholstery space.

Issue: “Trifecta still feels like it’s settling into its foundation…. On one of my three visits, we were served roasted grilled marrow bones that were far too rare. That beautiful bread—Ken’s levain is extraordinary—turned pink with blood. And that wasn’t the worst part. Atop the bones sat a thick layer of piccalilli of celery root, cauliflower, onions, fennel, cider vinegar, mustard seeds and mustard…the sharply bitter concoction outmuscled everything pleasant on the plate.”

Now: By September, Trifecta had really rounded into shape. Everyone has found a little something to love about Trifecta, especially when it comes to grabbing a seat at the bar for Meyer’s top-shelf bar snacks, including Old Bay-seasoned potato chips, hearty housemade sausages and cidergrilled chicken with fried onions. It’s also a sleeper pick for the best upscale happy hour in town, with a decadent pimento double cheeseburger on fresh ciabatta for only $10.

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FOOD & DRINK

taste 2015

Southeast’s Half Pint Cafe. Now it gets its own place. They’ll be open from early morning till at least 4 pm, Orndoff says, and will also serve eggs and bacon, breakfast sandwiches and “old-school diner stuff.” She’ll also serve Mudd Works coffee—the stuff roasted by the folks at Half Pint, who might still sling her bagels on weekends.

Opening: Feb. 12, 2015 Location: 531 SE 14th Ave., in the old Washington High School building.

From: A bunch of people. It’s a partnership among Jim Brunberg and Kevin Cradock of Mississippi Studios, Mark Adler of Aladdin Theater, and concert promoter True West.

The place: Holy crap, this is huge: an 850-seat theater, two different bars (Martha’s and Great Meadows), a big ol’ outdoor patio and rooftop deck, and a little sandwich shop.

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Opening: Winter 2015 Location: 1430 SE Water Ave., former site of Evoe inside Pastaworks.

From: Gabe Rosen and Kina Voelz of Biwa.

The place: Rosen’s ramen is already wellregarded in Portland, but with Noraneko he’s doubling down with a ramen-ya to match the izakaya. Rosen plans a straightforward ramen house: shio, shoyu and miso, plus gyoza and karaage.

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Opening: Early 2015 Location: 2133 SE 11th Ave., in the space formerly occupied by Tennessee Red’s.

From: Nick Ford and Brandon Gomez, the P.R.E.A.M. team from Ned Ludd.

The place: The Wu Tang-inspired pizza pop-up P.R.E.A.M. made Ned Ludd a go-to spot for the wood-fired-pizza crowd, and became popular enough that Gomez and Ford—with a little help from ChefStable’s Kurt Huffman—figured it made sense to open a full-fledged restaurant. Expect more beers and pizzas, out of a custom-made oven from Naples.

5. “Stolen Soul Saloon”

Opening: February 2015 Location: 727 SE Grand Ave., site of East Bank Saloon, which remains open and will transition.

From: Jayson Criswell and Robert Kowalski (Clinton Street Pub, Lutz Tavern, Crow Bar).

The place: A lot is still up in the air, but bartenders there say the owners have already put in better beer taps and upgraded the food, and are moving away from a sports bar to hangout.

“Stolen Soul Saloon” is on the liquor license, but unlikely to be the actual name.

6. Henry Higgins Boiled Bagels

Opening: February 2015 Location: 6420 SE Foster Road, site of a former check-cashing station.

From: Henry Higgins, naturally.

The place: Leah Orndoff’s boiled-bagel shop first popped up in a St. Johns pizza shop, then in

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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Burrasca

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8. Burrasca

Opening: Spring 2015 Location: To be determined.

From: Burrasca food cart, which is going brickand-mortar.

The place: Chef Paolo Calamai is making the jump from his little food cart on Southeast 28th Avenue—the one we named 2014 Food Cart of the Year—to a full-service Tuscan kitchen, with small plates, pasta, housemade sausage, desserts and Tuscan wines and craft beers. The cart closes Dec. 31.

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9. Black Water

Opening: As early as January, permits permitting. There have been a few small events already.

Location: 835 NE Broadway, former home of Pho Broadway.

From: The owners of punk-rock label Black Water Records.

The place: The punk label plans a 98-capacity vegan restaurant, occasional music venue and miniscule 3.5-barrel brewery that, combined with Habesha and Frank’s Noodle House on the same block, might make part of Irvington interesting for the first time in recent memory.

14. Holdfast Dining

Opening: Planned for Dec. 30.

Location: 3707 NE Fremont St., former home to quaint mini-mart Wilshire Market.

From: Jeff Smalley, previously of Grand Central Bakery and Baker & Spice, plus Little Bird Bistro alum Juliana Santos, and Joey Alvarez of Ken’s Artisan Pizza.

The place: Featuring a wood-fired oven, the restaurant will serve sourdough pizzas, veggies, meatballs, and salt-cod croquettes.

17. Clutch

Opening: January 2015 Location: 537 SE Ash St., former site of wine bar Sauvage, still home to Fausse Piste winery.

From: Chefs Will Preisch and Joel Stocks, already very popular while popping up at KitchenCru and elsewhere around town.

The place: Pop-up, schmop-up; all the itinerant chefs are slowly finding homes. This will be a four-day-a-week residency for Holdfast, with six-course meals for $65 and nine-course meals for $90.

Opening: Early 2015 Locations: Portland International Airport and Timberland Town Center in Beaverton.

From: Ken Norris, last seen at Riffle NW. The place: An upscale sausage mini-chain with stuff like, you know, smoked lamb.

18. Kukai

Opening: April 2015 Location: Timberland Town Center in Beaverton.

From: Japanese ramen chain Kukai, which has 18 locations in Japan and two in Seattle.

The place: Ramen, man, ramen. Based on reviews in Seattle, it should serve some of the better noodle soup in the area.

L eah N ash . com

4. P.R.E.A.M./Otter’s Sausagefest

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19. Shift Drinks

Opening: Early 2015 Location: A long-vacant spot in the Terminal Sales Building at 1200 SW Morrison St. From: Sommelier Anthony Garcia (Multnomah Whiskey Library) and cocktail-maker Alise Moffatt (Angel Face, House Spirits).

The place: A big ol’ 3,000-square-foot space with 25-foot columned ceilings, run by a pair of serious pros in wine and booze.

11. Purringtons Cat Lounge

Opening: January 2015 Location: 3529 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd.

From: Cat enthusiast Kristen Castillo.

The place: A goddamn cat cafe. Which is to say, a spot where coffee and food lovers can hang in proximity to insane numbers of cats—or about 10 of them, anyway. There will be a petting lounge for the lonely or the overly affectionate.

12. Moon Pizza

Opening: Winter 2015 Location: Southeast 20th Avenue and Powell Boulevard.

From: Bunk Sandwiches’ Tommy Habetz and Water Avenue Coffee’s Brandon Smyth.

The place: Habetz will be slinging old-school, East Coast, foldable pies…and there are hints he might drop some of that world-class pasta he used to make with Mario Batali. Smyth will make ice cream.

13. Renata

Opening: Soon? There have been delays since a summer 2014 projected opening.

Location: 626 SE 7th Ave., site of a former dairy.

From: Project Grace pop-up owners Nick and Sandra Arnerich and chef Matthew Sigler of San Francisco’s Flour & Water and Salumeria.

The place: A whopping 3,000-square-foot restaurant is planned with wood-fired dishes centered on Mediterranean-Italian fare, plus pasta.

20. TBD/Beer Pairing Restaurant

cheese bar

Opening: Late Spring 2015 Location: Southeast 7th Avenue and Yamhill Street.

From: Chef Paul Kasten (Wildwood), with Scott Lawrence (Breakside Brewery), Mike Wright (The Commons Brewery) and Brian Carrick.

The place: Kasten, known for his love of beer during his tenure as chef at Nob Hill mainstay Wildwood restaurant, will team up with a couple of brewing pros to make a wood-fired, farm-totable restaurant with whole-animal butchery and an emphasis on craft-beer pairings.

15. Chizu

Opening: Early 2015 Location: 1126 SW Alder St. From: Cheese guru Steve Jones of Cheese Bar. The place: Cheese served like sushi. So, like, check off the cheeses on a little card or get a Steve Jones special omakase of cheese. But cheese, man. Cheese. Oh, and plenty of beer, wine and sake.

16. Smokehouse Tavern

Opening: March 2015 Location: 1401 SE Morrison St., former home to Lightbar.

From: Smokehouse 21 pitmaster B.J. Smith.

The place: Hot damn. Our favorite ribs in Portland will find a home in Southeast—making this an immediate contender for the best barbecue place in Southeast Portland. The bar will serve snacks and stay open later than the Northwest location, and will open early for brunch on weekends.

A nna J aye G oellner

3. Noraneko

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2. BRODOJO/“Ham Bar”

Opening: Spring 2015 Location: 232 NW 12th Ave., former site of Jinx cocktail lounge.

From: The Nostrana and Oven & Shaker team (Cathy Whims, Ryan Magarian, Kurt Huffman).

The place: The name is to be determined—BRODOJO is an inside joke by Huffman—but the bar will be centered on international ham: Spanish ham, Southern ham, Italian ham, Midwestern ham, all kinds of ham. Oh, and sherry and cocktails aplenty from Magarian. Maybe he’ll put ham in those, too.

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7. Revolution Hall

The restaurants and bars we’re most looking forward to.

Opening: Dec. 29 was the first day.

Location: 1937 NW 23rd Place, former home to French fine-dining spot Noisette.

From: Annette Yang and Brian Leitner of Nettie’s Crab Shack in San Francisco.

The place: The 50-seat restaurant has been rehabbed considerably from its time as Noisette—the tables offer a bit more privacy, and there’s a more rustic-domestic feel, with a fireplace on the deck. The food will be a roaming variety of Old World Mediterranean, including, of course, the neglected Mediterranean fare of the south of France: “Le Vieux” means “the old” in French.

ww staff

feature

Smokehouse 21

HAPPY 2015!

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FIFTEEN FOR ’15 RANKING THE MOST-ANTICIPATED LOCAL ALBUMS OF THE COMING YEAR. BY m at t h e w s i n g e r

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msinger@wweek.com

If there were a Geiger counter to subjectively measure the year in music, the results would say that 2014 was not a particularly great one. Outside of D’Angelo finally emerging from the wilderness and the usual stray gems, there wasn’t a whole lot to get excited about. But music is a cyclical culture. If one year is underwhelming, the next is sure to be so stacked it’ll be a challenge just to keep up. That’s true on a global level, with expected releases from Kanye West, Radiohead, Kendrick Lamar and others, and it’s especially true in Portland, where 2015 is shaping up to be one of the biggest local music years in a long time. Here are 15 albums we can’t wait to hear, ranked by level of anticipation.

1. Sleater-Kinney, No Cities To Love (Release date: Jan. 20) Recorded in secret, in three cities, the first album in 10 years from American punk’s most riotous girls makes a good case for all bands taking decadelong vacations. “Anticipated” is a weak word in this case. Is there an adjective that means “on the brink of hemorrhaging from excitement”?

2. Vinnie Dewayne, St. Johns Scholar (Release date TBA) St. Johns’ answer to Kendrick Lamar has been teasing his second album for nearly two years, rolling out new tracks on SoundCloud and dropping a stopgap EP, Rites of Passage: Before the Scholar, right before Christmas. But Dewayne promises the completed full-length will arrive this spring, and when it does, it should cement the 23-year-old MC as Portland’s best storyteller, in rap or otherwise.

3. Natasha Kmeto, Inevitable (Release date TBA) The future-R&B singer-producer says her debut for Dave Sitek’s Federal Prism label is a more “vocal-forward” album than 2013’s blissed-out Crisis, which is evident from the sultry lead single. “Inevitable” is right: This is the year Kmeto goes from Portland’s best-kept secret to national star. Book it.

4. Modest Mouse, Strangers to Ourselves (Release date: March 3) In a non-Sleater-Kinney reunion year, Isaac Brock finally emerging with the follow-up to 2007’s We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank would be the biggest Portland music story heading into 2015. It’s still a big deal, though.

And judging by first single, “Lampshades on Fire,” the good news is that, after eight years away, Modest Mouse still sounds pretty Modest Mouse-y.

5. Shy Girls (Release date TBA) After topping our Best New Band poll in 2013, Dan Vidmar set his blue-eyed bedroom R&B project to simmer, putting out only an EP to go with the three songs he’d previously released. It was a smart move. Vidmar spent 2014 building allegiances—touring with Haim, getting online shout-outs from Brandy and Maxwell, collaborating with electronic producers Odesza and Jagwar Ma—ensuring plenty of ears

outside Portland will be listening when the group’s debut full-length drops in early 2015.

6. The Decemberists, What a Terrible World, What a Beautiful World (Release date: Jan. 20) Indie rock’s biggest brainiacs hit No. 1 with 2011’s The King Is Dead, which was either indicative of the band’s reach or just one of those Billboard anomalies that happens in an age when no one buys albums anymore. Either way, Colin Meloy and crew have a lot to live up to. Based on the sweet jangle of lead single “Make You Better”—and the accompanying video starring Nick Offerman in a turtleneck—that shouldn’t be a problem.

7. Ural Thomas and the Pain (Release date TBA) Portland’s rediscovery of deep-soul legend Thomas is one of the great local music stories of the past two years, but the musicians responsible for reviving his career know that unless his voice is preserved in the studio, he could easily backslide into obscurity. According to drummer and bandleader Scott Magee, the Pain is gathering a set of songs—covers, tunes from Thomas’ 1960s heyday, and a few originals—for recording, with California singer-songwriter Nick Waterhouse co-producing, alongside Magee, and a release date targeted for the end of summer.

8. Lord Dying, Poisoned Altars (Release date: Jan. 27) With 2013’s Summon the Faithless, Lord Dying rode a river of sludge to the top of the Portland doom metal heap. What to expect of their new album? Well, song titles include “(All Hopes of a New Day)…Extinguished” and “Suckling at the Teat of a She-Beast,” so take your best guess.

9. Wild Ones (Release date TBA) Keep It Safe made Wild Ones Portland’s synth-pop sweethearts two years ago, and while not a whole lot of details are available about the new release—other than it is currently being recorded at the historic Oregon Portland Cement Building—bet on it being guided by singer Danielle Sullivan’s irresistible twang.

10. Chromatics, Dear Tommy (Release date TBA) Producer Johnny Jewel has been emptying his hard drive of unreleased material as of late, presumably to make

room for Chromatics’ latest batch of ice-cold disco jams.

11. Rasheed Jamal, Sankofa (Release date: March) One-third of hip-hop crew the Resistance, Jamal claims his upcoming release “doesn’t sound like anything I or anyone on this coast has done before.” He compares it simultaneously to Fight Club, The Last Dragon and Coming to America. “I put myself in my 17-year-old mindset and went home on this mixtape,” he says. That’s a sterling selfendorsement if I’ve ever heard one.

12. Lost Lander, Medallion (Release date: Feb. 24) For most of his time as a songwriter, Matt Sheehy has worked alone or in pairs. But in his attempt to translate his first release under the Lost Lander imprimatur, 2012’s lushly detailed DRRT, live, the project evolved into a full-fledged, four-piece band. That’s the biggest difference with Medallion, which, like its predecessor, is produced by ex-Menomena member Brent Knopf, and bears an even fuller, more anthemic sound than DRRT. 13. Radiation City (Release date TBA) The soulful Space Age indie-pop quintet mounted a successful Kickstarter campaign for its third album, which the group is finishing at John Vanderslice’s Tiny Telephone Recording studio in San Francisco, though it’s “taking longer than expected,” according to guitarist Cameron Spies.

It hopes to have the record out by the end of the year.

14. Summer Cannibals, Show Us Your Mind (Release date: March 3) The roaring quartet doubled down on the grungy guitars and Jessica Boudreaux’s snarl for its second full-length, which it busted out in a single week at Jackpot Studios.

15. Sun Angle (Release date TBA) It’s been a rough road for the prog-punk trio since releasing the awesomely frenetic Diamond Junk in 2013, with singerguitarist Charlie Salas-Humara getting sidelined by an ear virus, and drummer Papi Fimbres about to take a yearlong German sabbatical. The band’s days appear numbered, but it isn’t going quietly. Says Fimbres: “We are in the process of writing an album which entails us pretty much blabbering about nothing until we start to jam, and then poof—we have an entire album worth of material.”

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dec. 31–jan. 6 = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines.

Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 31 MarchFourth Marching Band, Soulfire Sacred Dance Ensemble

[GYPSY CARNIVAL] For those who have not witnessed MarchFourth Marching Band in the flesh, remedy that at once. The troupe, formed around Fat Tuesday some 11 years ago, combines an arresting blend of carnival theatrics, gypsy song and funky, Cajun-inspired tunes.

There will be stilts, costumes, acrobatics and general tomfoolery. It’s the most perfect Portlandification of New Orleans you’ll witness. The 20-plus member group released Magnificent Beast in 2012, an aptly titled mashup of big-band brass, groovy basslines and enough whimsy to make Sufjan Stevens jealous. MARK STOCK. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm. $25 advance, $30 day of show on Dec. 30. $37 advance, $45 day of show, 9 pm Dec. 31. 21+.

Hot Tuna

COURTESY OF CLOSER PDx

[AULD ACQUAINTANCE] While the starting time seems a tad late for their increasingly geriatric fan base, Lord only knows how many New Year’s Eve toasts guitarist Jorma Kaukonen and bassist

Jack Casady have led during their 50-year musical partnership.

Parachuting off Jefferson Airplane just before the San Francisco troupe fully exploded as countercultural heroes—yet also avoiding the Starship embarrassments to follow—Hot Tuna has taken a decidedly slower route, with less psychedelia and more arcanelyfingered blues on 2011’s Steady As She Goes, their first album in two decades and a worthy addition to the canon. JAY HORTON. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. 9:30 pm. $75 advance, $80 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Eyelids, Bed.

[NEW PAISLEY UNDERGROUND] Eyelids released one of the loveliest Portland albums of 2014, 854, a masterful collection of psychedelic power-pop belying its members collective pedigrees playing for some of the best Northwest bands of the past 20-plus years. Another record, produced by R.E.M.’s Peter Buck, is already coming soon, but with singer-guitarist John Moen preparing to spend 2015 drumming for the Decemberists, this might be the last chance to see them around these parts for a while. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 328-2865. 10 pm. $10. 21+.

TOP FIVE

BY MITCH L IL L IE

FIVE PARTIES TO TURN UP YOUR NEW YEAR’S EVE Club Chemtrail, ASSS, Magic Fades Though not the only party this year that strongly frowns on bright colors, experiencing Club Chemtrail’s monochrome poly-club tracks in an actual warehouse is like a Siberian tiger born in captivity finally being returned to the wild. Information Warehouse, 411 SE 6th Ave. 8 pm. $15. 21+.

Black & White Ball L.A.’s Josh Peace and Miracles Club’s Rafael Fauria provide the backdrop for a vogue ball. If your experience with the vibrant ballroom scene extends further than Madonna’s “Vogue” video, you can compete, provided your outfit is “black, white and extravagant.” Service, 2319 NE Glisan St. 9 pm. $50 general admission, $150 VIP. 21+.

Beyondadoubt and Maxx Bass Because Dig a Pony isn’t crowded enough on a normal party night. Beyonda—longtime DJ, new-time producer—joins with Booty Bassment dweller Maxx Bass to spin boogie and shuffle jams and try to break the Guinness World Record for Least Elbow Room in a Single Venue. Dig a Pony, 736 SE Grand Ave. 8 pm. Free. 21+.

Bass Odyssey with Paper Diamond Nothing says “I’m from Colorado” like a press photo in which the act’s face is obscured by weed smoke. Paper Diamond makes stoner trap so anthemic it’ll rattle the logos upright on any “Fuccboi” T-shirt. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave. 7 pm. $35. 18+.

Annie Hall (pictured) Techno is arguably the best way to maintain your dance stamina all night. Annie Hall is a Spanish-born, Detroit-based master of infusing techno with hints of pop and dub without losing the music’s fundamental, energetic drive. Rotture, 315 SE 3rd Ave. 9 pm. $10 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

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[NY ROCKIN’ E] For the past six New Year’s Eves, Weinland’s Adam Shearer has gathered together friends for an evening of cover songs that don’t suck. Not sure what they’ll be playing tonight when the proverbial ball drops, but chances are you’ll be able to sing along.

Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $25 advance, $28 day of show. 21+.

Roselit Bone, the Cry, Will Stenberg

[POST-APOCALYPTIC COUNTRY] Much of the songs on Blacken & Curl, Roselit Bone’s debut, were inspired by leader Josh McCaslin’s time spent living in a remote, decaying forest 45 miles inland from Coos Bay. But the imagery invoked by the music and lyrics is of a parched dystopia more than isolated coastal woods, where there are “ravens the size of dogs,” the sky is “dusty sunset red” and God laughs at “the slow, hot death of the world.” Instead of the usual outlawcountry reference points, McCaslin drew upon mid-20th-century singeractors like Roy Rogers, adding Ennio Morricone guitar twang and mariachi horns to create a sweeping cinematic sound self-described as “psychotic cowboy music.” Even if the scenery is fictionalized, though, the sense of dread is totally autobiographical. MATTHEW SINGER. Kelly’s Olympian, 426 SW Washington St., 228-3669. 9 pm. Free. 21+.

Ural Thomas & the Pain, Houndstooth, DJ Cooky Parker, DJ Bobby D

[LIVING DICTIONARY OF SOUL] Without asking him directly, I’d wager that 2014 was the best year of Ural Thomas’ career since he last performed at the Apollo, which was probably sometime in the late ’60s.

Thanks to the admiration of the members in his younger backing band, the 74-year-old Portlandbred soul singer went from obscurity to living-legend status this year, becoming the oldest artist to place first in WW’s annual Best New Band poll and selling out venues across town. Thomas is about to take the next step in his late-life renaissance, recording a new album with a scheduled release sometime in 2015, but he puts an exclamation point on a banner 12 months tonight.

MATTHEW SINGER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm. Sold out. 21+.

Brownish Black, the Sentiments, the Get Ahead

[GUTTURAL SOUL] Portland’s other great throwback soul group rings in 2015 with the sounds of 1967ish.

While their contemporaries in Ural Thomas & the Pain evoke Motown smoothness, Brownish Black conjures a rustier, dirtier side of oldschool R&B. If you prefer shooting whiskey over sipping champagne, this is probably where you should be come midnight. Secret Society Lounge, 116 NE Russell St., 493-3600.

9 pm. $20. 21+.

The Whines, Woolen Men, Still Caves, Therapists

[THUDDING SPLENDOR] Given its string of releases between 2009 and 2011, as well as a massive dump of gruff, ’90s-inspired songs on Go, Demos, Go, the Whines’ relative silence over the past few years is surprising. But there’s scant reason to think that the group isn’t still capable of raising a ruckus.

Conversely, Woolen Men are afloat in low-run tape releases and a 2014 single, Quick Trips, channeling Manchester post-punk through the guise of thudding, American superlatives. There’s a bit of sonic overlap between the two acts, but it’s mostly that neither finds it necessary to revel in studio splendor while putting together all those records.

DAVE CANTOR. The Know, 2026 NE Alberta St., 473-8729. 8 pm. $5. 21+.

The Mentors, Nekro Drunkz, Schroeder Bomb, Truculence

[BALLS DROPPING, CORKS POPPING] Erstwhile pioneers of “rape rock,” never unobjectionable but oh-so-slightly redeemed by the tone-deaf objections of censorship crusader Tipper Gore—the Congressional recital of “Golden Showers” lyrics is an especially proud moment for the republic—the Mentors seemed for all the world to be a one-joke band, no longer that funny after drummer-vocalist and provocateur-in-chief El Duce’s 1997 death-by-freight train (days after alleging that Courtney Love solicited his aid in murdering her husband).

Somehow the troupe soldiered on with Mentors’ tribute-act frontman Mad Dog Marc DeLeon joining Sickie Wifebeater and Dr. Heathen Scum on 2009’s Ducefixion and the resulting eterna-tour. As they say, party bands never die, though their members aren’t quite so lucky.

JAY HORTON. Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543. 9 pm. $8. 21+.

Maseo (of De La Soul), Slimkid3, Ronin Roc, DJ Juggernaught

[HIP-HOP NYE] A sleeper entry for best New Year’s Eve party brings together members of two iconic

CONT. on page 30

PROFILE COURTESY OF NOCTILUCENT ARTS

Weinland’s NYE Supergroup, Hook & Anchor

MUSIC

MBRASCATU FRIDAY, JAN. 2 Fifty years ago, in a small village in Southern Italy, there lived a taciturn family man with the nickname “Mbrascatu”—“Dirty Face.” To this day, when Andrea Algieri returns to his home village of Luzzi in Calabria, most people don’t remember who he is until he reluctantly shares the nickname of his grandfather: “Oh! Mbrascatu! Andrea Mbrascatu!”

In 2007, Algieri moved to Portland and formed the Andrea Algieri Band, combining classic Italian vocals with broader world and folk influences. Soon into its existence, though, Algieri realized the band’s name wasn’t giving enough credit to the contributions of each musician, most of whom he met playing at open mics.

One night, he and his bandmates got into a drunken conversation about childhood nicknames.

“Mbrascatu!” Algieri said. “That’s it!”

Three years and several new members later, Mbrascatu is set to release its latest album, Tempo. While definitely more worldly than most of Portland’s plaid-clad masses, the band’s sound is closer to Blind Pilot than Andrea Bocelli. Mbrascatu plays much more diverse and contemporary music than the “Italian folk” label would otherwise give it credit for.

“I try to avoid the word ‘Italian,’ because every time I say ‘Italian,’ people think about this standard gondola music,” Algieri says.

“And every time people think that when I sing, I sing about love.

“The first track is about our Prime Minister Berlusconi, and all the affairs [he had] with underage people.”

Mbrascatu cites such a wide array of influences, it’s hard to tie its sound down to any physical location. But it does call Portland home, and the band made its latest record with one of the most Portland-y producers out there, Adam Selzer, who’s previously worked with the Decemberists, M. Ward and Blind Pilot. The eclecticism is evident: “Non Dirmi,” a meandering track with banjo and horns, is followed by “San Francisco Bar,” a quickly paced number featuring violins and a jazzy guitar riff. “I don’t want to sound like we are original, because I think that there is nothing original on the planet right now,” Algieri says. “But we are trying to be interesting.”

In a market flooded with distortion pedals and vocal effects, there’s something refreshing about hearing folk music with Italian lyrics in the typical Portland haunts. Mbrascatu reminds us that “local” can mean more than a small circle drawn around the metro area.

“That is the magic around music,” Algieri says. “You can travel without moving.” PARKER HALL.

Bringing Italy to Portland, and vice-versa.

SEE IT: Mbrascatu plays Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., with Redwood Son and the Revelry, and Laura Ivancie, on Friday, Jan. 2. 9 pm. $7. 21+.

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wednesday–saturday

golden-era hip-hop groups—affable De La Soul DJ Maseo and Tre “Slimkid3” Hardson of the Pharcyde—with local vinyl-slingers Ronin Roc and Juggernaught for a night sure to be filled with classic cuts. White Owl Social Club, 1305 SE 8th Ave., 236-9672. 7 pm. $20. 21+.

FRIDAY, JAN. 2 Primus & the Chocolate Factory

[SNOZZBERRY STOMP] How did Primus take this long to record a tribute to the Willy Wonka soundtrack? I mean, the originals sounded like stuff Les Claypool would write two decades before his claymation-funk power trio stomped out of the Bay Area in the early Alternative Nation days. Did the world technically need a fulllength re-recording of those disturbing psychedelic nursery rhymes overlaid with Claypool’s slap-happy and nasally carnival-barker speaksinging? Probably not. But the live show—an appropriately bizarre spectacle featuring giant Oompa Loompa heads, among other oddities—is definitely something to see. Snort some snozzberries and prepare for a wild trip. MATTHEW SINGER. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 248-4335.

8 pm. $43-$53.50. All ages.

Jerry Joseph & the Jackmormons

[BAR ROCK] The hard-hitting, long-running, roots-scented local institution spends two nights on East Burnside. Eclectic songwriter Fernando Viciconte supports on Night 1, while the bluesy ensemble Mexican Gunfight opens Night 2.

Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Through Jan. 3.

Hearts of Oak, Meridian, Gabe Rozzell

[PSYCH COUNTRY] Nate Wallace’s Hearts of Oak play dark-alley Americana that strays

now and again into spacier territory. The Portland musician cites Spiritualized and Crazy Horse as big influences, especially on his latest record, New England. Vocally, Wallace is as tried-and-true as they come, touting an airy voice of old.

Musically, Hearts of Oak prefers to wander, pairing eerie, steely folk with biting fuzz rock. The trio (and sometimes quartet) has a revisionist quality about it, taking a classic genre and putting it under a blurrier, sometimes stoned, microscope. MARK STOCK. White Eagle Saloon, 836 N Russell St., 282-6810.

9 pm. $8. 21+.

SATURDAY, JAN. 3 Dead Moon, Long Knife, the Drawingboard

[ONCE AGAIN IN A DEAD MOON] When Dead Moon reunited to headline the Crystal Ballroom in early 2014, it truly seemed like the last time it would ever happen.

Going into the gig, the members of the legendary Portland punk band appeared hobbled by age and health problems both disclosed and kept secret, and though they wouldn’t say it out loud, at the time the feeling was, if they didn’t play now, they might never get the chance to do it again. A few months later, frontman Fred Cole underwent emergency heart surgery. It was successful, but the future of not just Dead Moon but all his projects with wife Toody remained in doubt. Of course, “doubt” is a word that should never be used in reference to Fred Cole, because a year after that triumphant reunion show, we’re being blessed with another. Still, it’s advisable not to take these shows for granted. You never know when, or if, Dead Moon will rise again, so take the opportunity to bask in its ragged glow when you have the chance. MATTHEW SINGER. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 2250047. 8 pm. $20. All ages.

PAT R I C K J E F F O R D S

PREVIEW

Les Sins, Ben Tactic, DJs Kiffo & Rymes [ELECTRONICA EXHALED] As Toro y Moi, South Carolina native Chaz Bundick has excelled at turning out cool, complex electronica made up of groovy basslines and unexpected samples.

Chances are, you’ve heard Bundick’s work, whether at a crowded bar during last call or a pop-up warehouse party. As a co-founder of the chillwave subgenre, Bundick has an uncanny way of taking the air out of busy, beat-centric jams without deflating them entirely. As Les Sins, his new solo side project, the story is much the same. Debut LP Michael testifies to Bundick’s keen production skills. If anything, this new project is bouncier, more thrill than chill. It’s mildly trippy workout music, built around disco structures, vocals that sound like gentle commands, and a lot of rhythmic momentum. In other words, it’s just what your friend who contends he doesn’t like to dance needs. MARK STOCK. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 8 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $25. 21+.

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tions. While most of her recordings could function in an unplugged setting with a buzzing hand-medown PA, her careful study of diarydriven folk-punk has afforded her the confidence to take threadbare compositions and turn them up to 11 when the mood is fitting, which happens to be almost always. PETE COTTELL. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $3.

21+.

CLASSICAL, JAZZ & WORLD DJ Anjali & The Incredible Kid

white party: primus plays arlene Schnitzer Concert hall on Friday, Jan. 2.

Grammies, Johanna Warren

[INSTRUMENTAL BREAKBEAT JAZZ] Grammies were the most outre act to make this year’s Best New Band list, a sax-and-drum duo interpreting J Dilla-style breaks through the kaleidoscope of free jazz. In May, the band ostensibly broke up, as drummer Dan Sutherland moved all the way to Hillsboro and put all his focus on completing a physicians assistant program at Pacific University. Before going on hiatus, however, saxophonist Noah Bernstein—occasional member of both Tune-Yards and Shy Girls—made it known that they had a studio album already in the can.

That record, appropriately titled Great Sounding, is finally coming out. And, lo and behold, Sutherland is apparently making the arduous 15 minute drive to play the release show tonight. It’s a post-Christmas miracle! MATTHEW SINGER. Habesha Lounge, 801 NE Broadway.

9 pm. $5. 21+.

Anita Margarita and the Rattlesnakes [JAZZ-ABILLY] An all-star local affair consisting of members of the Freak Mountain Ramblers, Sleazy Pieces and more, Anita Margarita and the Rattlesnakes are teeming with talent. Big names like Turtle VanDemarr and Jon Koonce generally perform with their own side projects, but this hybrid act sees jazz, rockabilly and a lot of selfsufficient individuals performing in utter harmony. If you’ve ever wondered what the Beverly Hillbillies would sound like as a swinging jazz band, here’s your opportunity. MARK STOCK. Secret Society Lounge, 116 NE Russell St., 4933600. 6 pm. Free for ages 16 and under, $5 above. All ages.

SUNDAY, JAN. 4 David Lindley

[BROWNE BUNNY] A string virtuoso whose arsenal of favored instruments (bouzouki, baglama, oud) reads like Doctor Who’s rogues’ gallery, David Lindley first rose to notoriety through long-lasting, widely respected collaborations with Jackson Browne and Ry Cooder. But, while the infinitely talented sideman remains a musician’s musician, recent years have found his performances equally dominated by an aggressively impish sense of humor. He’ll still draw ahs amid

whirling fretwork and wring tears on a slide of the steel, but from the garishly patterned shirts through songs dedicated to Excedrin and man-boobs, Lindley’s late-life passion revolves around coaxing the patient laughter blessed upon an adored uncle. JAY HORTON. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm. $25 advance, $30 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Hibou, Appendixes, Satsuma

[DREAM POP] “Hibou” means “owl” in French, but owls make you think of a forest, which is a strange setting in which to place Hibou’s music. With their hazy vocals and boppy beats, the singles from the artist known as Peter Michel’s inthe-works debut full-length are better suited for the beach. After all, Michel’s debut EP is named Dunes and contains as many surfy guitar riffs as the title would imply. But then, Michel, who hails from Seattle, claims to have been inspired by Washington’s ancient, lush forests, so maybe the owl thing makes sense, if only in his head. SHANNON GORMLEY. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 894-9708. 9:30 pm. $5. 21+.

Gaytheist, Divers

[BRUTE TRIO] Gaytheist prides itself on brevity and snark. The local trio’s songs bash together punk and blistering metal and typically clock in at under two minutes, relying on singer-guitarist Jason Rivera’s ridiculous social commentary. The group’s thundering Hold Me…But Not So Tight issues clever lyrics alongside Nick Parks’ bombastic fills and Tim Hoff’s low, drudging bass riffs. The music isn’t polite, but then again, the reprieve from Portland’s general pleasantness helps keep us in check. BRANDON WIDDER. Rontoms, 600 E Burnside St., 2364536. 8:30 pm. Free. 21+.

TUESDAY, JAN. 6 Red Bull Sound Select: Waxahatchee, the Ghost Ease, Us Lights [BEDROOM PUNK] Katie Crutchfield’s rising star has been oh-so-pleasant to track from the bedroom to the top of marquees. Her 2013 record Cerulean Salt, released under her Waxahatchee moniker, is one of the most enduring examples of the East Coast’s thriving D.I.Y. scene making good on huge ambi-

[BOLLY NEW YEAR] DJ Anjali & the Incredible Kid have been Portland’s leading world-music DJs since the turn of the millennium, but this 14th-anniversary gig offers more than the usual whirling bhangra and Bollywood vibe that would make a fine New Year’s evening anyway. Along with other species of subcontinental beats (Giddha Bounce, Urban Desi and more), the party includes Portland tribal belly dancer NagaSita (a Wanderlust Circus regular who incorporates Indian and Tibetan classical dance forms), Portland’s LoveBomb Go-Go Marching Band, new Bolllywood visuals by Micah Schmelzer, and more ingredients for an NYE party that’s as much visual and physical as musical. BRETT CAMPBELL. Bossanova Ballroom, 722 E Burnside St., 206-7630. 9 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $17 advance, $22 day of show. 21+.

Melao de Cuba

[HAVANA NEW YEAR] The word “melao” may do a disservice to Portland’s Melao de Cuba. Its superficial resemblance to the false cognate “mellow” hardly describes the octet’s danceable, driving salsa fueled by saxophones, trumpet, trombone, congas, timbales, vocals and rhythm. Nor does its actual Spanish translation, “molasses,” because the music’s hardly slow.

It’s what the Cubans turn molasses into—rum—that really suggests what the Cuban music ensemble (now entering its second decade) is up to: warm, dizzying and with a potent kick if you overindulge, as you most definitely should, especially on the last night of the year. Led by Cubanborn Portland drummer-percussionist Virginia Lopez, the members boast backgrounds and other gigs in jazz, classical and other worldmusic ensembles but come together to play traditional Cuban music that’s ideal for a party—especially in this month that sees the beginning of the end of the long estrangement between Cuba and the U.S. BRETT CAMPBELL. Mississippi Pizza, 3552 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3231.

9:30 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $20 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

Randy Porter Trio

[NEW YEAR’S JAZZ] Randy Porter is one of those perennial Portland jazz prophets without honor in his own homeland: His performances are usually eclipsed by whatever New York jazzer happens to be in town that week, but his improvisational creativity can easily outshine the bigger names. The fact that many of said eminences (Golson, Farmer, Hubbard, Schuur and many others) eagerly employ his services should attest to his top-level playing. This Friends of Chamber Music trio date showcases an hour of the music of another famous Porter much beloved by jazzers over the years: theater-musical composer Cole Porter. There’s also an option for a pre-concert supper at private homes. BRETT CAMPBELL. The Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 2222031. 7:30 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $35 concert and reception, $125 for dinner. All ages.

For more Music listings, visit Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

31

MUSIC CALENDAR

[DEC. 31-JAN. 6] Landmark Saloon

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Editor: Mitch Lillie. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitevents. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com.

4847 SE Division St. Whiskey Wednesday, Jake Ray & The Cowdogs

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. The Crackpots

For more listings, check out wweek.com.

LAST WEEK LIVE RONITPHOTO.COM

Lucky Horseshoe Lounge

2524 S.E. Clinton St. Surfin’ New Year’s Eve

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Melao de Cuba

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Ural Thomas & the Pain, Houndstooth, DJ Cooky Parker, DJ Bobby D

Monarch Hotel & Conference Center 12566 SE 93rd Ave. New Years Eve Baby Boomers Social Club

O’Connor’s

7850 SW Capitol Hwy. Jack McMahon Band

Old Church & Pub

30340 SW Boones Ferry Rd. New Year’s Eve!

Ponderosa Lounge

10350 N Vancouver Way Humptulips, New Years Eve Party

Rock Creek Tavern

10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. La Rivera

Sentinel Hotel

614 SW 11th Ave. New Year’s Eve Governor’s Ball with Patrick Lamb

Skamania lodge

1131 SW Skamania Lodge Way New Year’s Eve

Star Theater

IF THESE HILLS COULD SING: Some performances are so technically impressive that nothing else really matters. Such is the case with the von Trapps, the sibling vocal quartet that played two sold-out shows at Mississippi Studios on Dec. 26. Running through a set that included holiday classics, originals, traditional songs from around the world and even a number from The Sound of Music (yes, they are those von Trapps—Maria was their great-grandmother), the show wasn’t “cool” or “musically adventurous.” It was the kind of show where a performance of the French Christmas carol “Noël Nouvelet” elicits excited coos from the mostly middle-aged audience. But the Portland group’s harmonies were so dialed in and neatly arranged that it nearly defied criticism. After all, how often can you say you went to a show in Portland and got blown away by a song from 1968’s Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? JAMES HELMSWORTH. Read the full review at wweek.com/lastweeklive.

WED. DEC. 31 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Esme Patterson

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. New Year’s Eve with Hot Tuna

Alberta Rose Theatre 3000 NE Alberta St. MarchFourth Marching Band, Soulfire Sacred Dance Ensemble

Alberta Street Public House

1036 NE Alberta St. NYE Melodic Art Rock Masquerade: The Fourth Wall, White Bear Polar Tundra, Seth Brewster & FRIZZ, The Fourth Wall, White Bear Polar Tundra, Seth Brewster and FRIZZ

Alhambra Theatre

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Bollywood New Years Eve: Jai Ho! Party with DJ Prashant

32

Andina Restaurant 1314 NW Glisan St, Toshi Onizuka (Trio), Borikuas

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Grateful Buds NYE Bash!

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

The Fenix Project

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Three for Silver

Bossanova Ballroom

722 E Burnside St. DJ Anjali & The Incredible Kid

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Danny Hay Davis & The Rat Pack

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Cool Breeze

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside Street New Year’s Eve in Funklandia’ withThe Motet, Polyrhythmics

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St Hopeless Jack and the Handsome Devil, Black Snake and Swamp Devil

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Weinland’s NYE Supergroup, Hook & Anchor

Dublin Pub-Beaverton 6821 SW Beaverton Hillsdale Hwy. Crazy 8s New Years Eve Show

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Strange Tones NYE Bash, Suburban Slims Blues Jam

Edgefield 2126 SW Halsey St. John Bunzow, Will West & The Friendly Strangers

Gemini Bar & Grill

456 N State St. Jacob Merlin and Sarah Billings

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. 2015 New Year’s Eve, Sonny Hess Band, McDougall

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. McDougall

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. New Year’s Eve with Mel Brown

Jo Rotisserie & Bar 715 NW 23rd Ave George Colligan Trio

Justa Pasta

1336 NW 19th Ave Anson Wright Duo

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Roselit Bone, the Cry, Will Stenberg

13 NW 6th Ave. Jerry Joseph & The Jackmormons, Haymaker

The GoodFoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Scott Pemberton Trio

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. The Whines, Woolen Men, Still Caves, Therapists

The Lehrer

8775 SW Canyon Ln. Norman Sylvestr

The Lodge Bar & Grill 6605 SE Powell Blvd.

Pete Ford Band

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave. Randy Porter Trio

The Ranger Station PDX

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd Ranger Station New Year, Phish Stream

The Secret Society 116 NE Russell St. Brownish Black, The Sentiments, The Get Ahead

The Spare Room

4830 NE 42nd Ave Caleb Klauder Country Band, Cahalen Morrison & Country Hammer

The Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

The Mentors, Nekro Drunkz, Schroeder Bomb, Truculence

Thirsty Lion Pub

SW 2nd & Ash St. New Year’s Eve Party

Trail’s End Saloon 1320 Main Street Rae Gordon Band

True Brew

3370 SE Milwaukie Ave, Portland, OR 97202 Humpday Hoedown

Turn! Turn! Turn!

8 NE Killingsworth St. Mike Coykendall, Pendejo, Grand Style Orchestra

Vie De Boheme

1530 SE 7th Ave. New Years Eve Masquerade Ball, Ken DeRouchie Band

Wilf’s Restaurant & Bar

800 NW 6th Ave. Tim RappTrio, Ron Steen Band

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Fruition, The Quick & Easy Boys

THURS. JAN. 1 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Esme Patterson

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. New Year’s Day Party with The Great State

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

Ben Jones and Friends

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Skip vonKuske’s Cellotronik

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St Dookie Jam featuring Tony Ozier & the Doo Doo Funk

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St. Kris Deelane’s Sun Celebration: New Year’s Day

Mock Crest Tavern 3435 N Lombart St. Open Mic Jam with Johnnie Ward

The Lodge Bar & Grill 6605 SE Powell Blvd.

Ben Rice B3 Trio

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny St. The Howl & Soccer Babes

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Rogue Giant

FRI. JAN. 2 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Esme Patterson

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Primus & the Chocolate Factory

Artichoke Music

3130 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Friday Night Coffeehouse

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Lynn Conover & Jim Boyer

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Oh My Mys

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Randy Starr

Crush Bar

1400 SE Morrison St. Burlesque S’il Vous Plait

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St Three Bad Jacks, THe Twangshifters, Jackrabbit Starts & Killing Matilda

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Jerry Joseph and The Jackmormons

Dublin Pub

6821 SW Beaverton Hillsdale Hwy. Free Style Fridays

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Bill Rhoades & the Party Kings

Edgefield

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Cool Breeze

Crystal Ballroom

2126 SW Halsey St. Anita Margarita & The Rattlesnakes

1332 W Burnside Street Dead Moon

Hawthorne Theatre

830 E Burnside St. Jerry Joseph and The Jackmormons

1507 SE 39th Ave. Dr. Know featuring Kyle Toucher

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd.

The Bottom Shelf Band

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. Jimmy Bivens

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Bureau of Standards Big Band Post NYE Bash

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Tree Frogs

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Baby Gramps

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Jenny Sizzler

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Sink or Swim, Pretty Gritty

Mississippi Studios

Doug Fir Lounge

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Bill Rhoades & the Party Kings

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St. Tony Smiley

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Booty Bassment, Dimitri Dickinson, Maxx Bass, Nathan Detroit

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. Billy D

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Sabroso

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St. Jamie Leopold & the Short Stories, Amanda Richards & the Good Long Whiles

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Weekend Assembly, Ritim Egzotik

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Mbrascatu, Redwood Son and The Revelry

Mock Crest Tavern

Mock Crest Tavern

Ponderosa Lounge

Ponderosa Lounge

Starday Tavern

Rouge Pub

The Know

Slocum House Gallery 360

The Lovecraft

3435 N Lombart St. Suburban Slim

10350 N Vancouver Way Country Wide 31500 NW Commercial St The Lesser Three

605 Esther Street Music for Surf Flamenco Guitar Duo

The Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Ben Hunter & Joe Seamons

3435 N Lombart St. Adequates

10350 N Vancouver Way Britnee Kellogg 6517 SE Foster Road Zindu 2026 NE Alberta St. Vice Device, Vats, Shadowlands 421 SE Grand Ave. Misprid Dance Party

The Ranger Station PDX

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd The Druthers

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St. Pink Lady & John Bennett Jazz Band

116 NE Russell St. Errick Lewis, Saeeda Wright, Hailey Niswanger, Thara Memory, Anita Margarita and the Rattlesnakes

The Tonic Lounge

The Tonic Lounge

The Secret Society

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

Cali Punk Legends, Fang, Millions of Dead Cops, Chartbusters

Torta-Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Live Music

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Reverb Brothers

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Hearts of Oak, Meridian, Gabe Rozzell

SAT. JAN. 3 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Esme Patterson

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Fez Fatale

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE McDougall

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Live Music

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

Erik Anarchy & Minty Rosa, with Brigader & Raw Dog and The Close Calls

Torta-Landia

4144 SE 60th Ave. Live Music

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Soul Saturdays with DoveDriver

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. BLVD Park, The Neil Darling Band

Winona Grange No. 271 8340 SW Seneca St. MnM’s Square Dance

SUN. JAN. 4 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Cristina Cano

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. David Lindley

CONT. on page 34

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33

MUSIC CALENDAR Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

Kevin Selfe and the Tornadoes Jam Session

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Hibou, Appendixes, Satsuma

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Portland Casual Jam

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Ron Steen Jazz Jam

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St. Jack McMahon

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ave. I Declare War, When the Broken Burn, Eternal Covenant, Between Chaos And Creation

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Freak Mountain Ramblers, Open Mic

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Tree Top Tribe, Spodeo’s

Plews Brews

8409 N. Lombard St. Open Mic

Rontoms

600 E. Burnside St. Gaytheist and Divers

The Firkin Tavern 1937 SE 11th Ave. Open Mic

The Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Irish

The Ranger Station PDX

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd Hot Club Time Machine & Guests

The Rialto Corner Bar, Portland, OR

Trail’s End Saloon 1320 Main Street Rae Gordon

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Rob Johnston

MON. JAN. 5 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Cristina Cano

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

Hot Tea Cold

Corkscrew

1665 SE Bybee Ave. Open Mic

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St. Skip vonKuske’s Cellotronik

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Dan Balmer Trio

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Kung Pao Chickens, Copper and Coal

Mississippi Pizza Pub.

3552 N. Misssissippi Ave Mr. Ben

Plews Brews

8409 N. Lombard St. Med Monday

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Singer Songwriter Showcase, Eric John Kaiser

TUES. JAN. 6 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Cristina Cano

Analog Cafe & Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

People’s Ink Weekly

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

A.C. Porter and Special Guests, Blue Tuesday

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Soul Provider, Naomi T

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Waxahatchee

Duff’s Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave Wingtips

Edgefield

2126 SW Halsey St. Fractal Quintet

Embers Portland

11 NW Broadway Recycle Dark Dance Night

Jade Lounge

The GoodFoot Lounge

2342 SE Ankeny St. The Hour That Stretches

The Know

221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown Septet

2845 SE Stark St. Sonic Forum Open Mic

Jimmy Mak’s

2026 NE Alberta St. Wolfhammer3, Mythological Horses, Saucy Yoda

LaurelThirst Public House

The Muddy Rudder Public House

Pub at the End of the Universe

The Ranger Station PDX

Vie De Boheme

8105 SE 7th Ave. Lloyd Jones

4260 SE Hawthorne Blvd Buzz Holland

2958 NE Glisan St. Jackstraw

4107 SE 28th Ave. Open Jam 1530 SE 7th Ave. Salsa Night

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St. The Moth Storyslam Portland JESSE RIGGINS

529 SW 4th Ave. The Famous Haydell Sisters

DEC. 31–JAN. 1

SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT: Waxahatchee plays Doug Fir Lounge on Tuesday, Jan. 6.

34

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

DEC. 31–JAN. 1

MUSIC CALENDAR THOMAS TEAL

BAR REVIEW

Where to drink this week.

1. Habesha 801 NE Broadway, 284-4299.

This little bar above an Ethiopian restaurant has been bringing the ruckus this year, from underground shows to reggae to one of the most raucous karaoke nights in town each Thursday night, the crowd filling out from the back-wall restroom door to the edge of its second-floor patio.

2. BTU Brasserie 5846 NE Sandy Blvd., 971-407-3429, btupdx.com.

Not only has the food gotten spicier since the place opened, but this Chinese restaurant and brewpub is starting to fill out their beer list. BTU now offers an herbal lager with rice flavor that pairs beautifully with the food.

3. Savoy Tavern 2500 SE Clinton St., 808-9999, savoypdx.com.

All-Way Restaurant’s In-NOut-style burgers just got added to Savoy’s menu next to all those Mule variations and infused liquors, making this a fine place to eat and drink casually near the toniest restaurants in Portland. But don’t worry yourself too much, Midwesterners: The cheese curds are still sticking around.

4. Civic Taproom 621 SW 19th Ave., thecivictaproom.com.

This little spot could stand to be more adventurous in its beer selection, but you know what?

It’s nice to get delivery of purple potatoes from Boise Fry Company and a solid craft beer just around the corner from Providence Park.

5. The Knock Back 2315 NE Alberta St., 284-4090, theknockback.com.

The Knock Back has added top-notch bartender Jesse Card to make an unlikely transition to fine cocktail bar, with whiskey cocktails using pumpkin, quince or Madeira as mixers. But at the moment, its best feature is probably the hand-warming fire pit out front for the smokers.

TEMPEST IN A MARTINI GLASS: Mike and Brian McMenamin seem steadfast in their belief that if a thing should be done, it should be done a lot. Their Edgefield distillery built up to 9- and 13-year brandies before becoming one of the first in Portland to both distill and age its whiskeys three years. They have 24 separate breweries. And if one McMenamins hotel was a good idea, why not 10? And so of course when the McBrothers converted their old Nob Hill haunt The Rams Head (2282 NW Hoyt St., 221-0098, mcmenamins.com) into an artisanal cocktail bar, the starting drink menu was a wee 14 pages long. There are liquor jellies, four whiskey flights, and flights for brandy, rum and tequila. Among the mixed drinks, an endless list of classics shares page space with variants made from Edgefield and Cornelius Pass’ stock: A Nieux Carre with Hogshead whiskey instead of rye (and their excellent 13-year Alambic brandy in place of cognac) is a slightly caramelly take on the classic Cajun cocktail Vieux Carre, while a Manhattan variant makes the same whiskey trade but compensates with a bit of hot sherry. There’s still some tuning to do in the balance of those drinks, but a classic gin fizz was a perfect example of the form. A pomegranate-infused sparkler was a revelation as part of a threedeep bartender’s choice cocktail flight—a novel and welcome addition to the mixology repertoire—matched with a serviceable Blood and Sand and a copper-cupped Apple Pie that tasted a lot like apple pie. Patrons haven’t all caught on to the change yet—we saw a lot of beer in the booths—but with cocktail prices significantly lower than Pearl and West End competitors’, the Rams Head will get into the mix soon enough.

MATTHEW KORFHAGE.

FRI. JAN. 2 Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Helix, GANG$IGN$, Coast2C, DJ Rafael

Rae’s Lakeview Lounge

WED. DEC. 31 Dig a Pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. Beyondadoubt, Maxx Bass

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Les Sins, Ben Tactic, DJs Kiffo & Rymes, Black Opal

Moloko Plus

3967 N Mississippi Ave. King Tim 33 1/3

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave. Bass Odyssey: Paper Diamond, Milo & Otis

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Annie Hall, Bryan Zentz, SciFiSol Music and Mr. Frio aka Camino Acid

The Lost & Found 5426 N. Gay Ave. DJ Jimbo

The Whiskey Bar

31 NW 1st Ave 2015 New Years Eve Party

THURS. JAN. 1 The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Shadowplay

1900 NW 27th Ave DJ Mike-a-nay

Valentines

232 SW Ankeny Happy Hours with Theo Craig & Friends, After Hours with Sapho

SAT. JAN. 3 Gemini Lounge

6526 SE Foster Rd. DJ Encrypted

Moloko Plus

3967 N Mississippi Ave. DJ Roane

Willamette Week’s

4th Annual

Nonprofits, Here’s your best chance to find great volunteers for the new year ahead!

On January 14 and 21, Willamette Week will be publishing in print and online — our fourth annual Volunteer Guide.

Rae’s Lakeview Lounge

1900 NW 27th Ave DJ Common Denominator

MON. JAN. 5 Cadigan’s Corner Bar

It works! Hurry: The deadline is Monday 1/5 at 4pm.

5501 SE 72nd Ave. Fight Church TV, Jessie

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Departures, DJ Waisted and Friends

TUES. JAN. 6 The Lodge Bar & Grill

Contact Matt Plambeck at WW to learn more.

Call 503-445-2757 or go to

wweek.com/volunteerguide

6605 SE Powell Blvd.

DJ Easy Finger

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Bones with DJ Aurora

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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PERFORMANCE RACHEL NEVILLE

SPRING AWAKENING PERFORMANCE PICKS FOR SPRING 2015.

BY R E BE CC A JACO B S O N KAIT I E TO D D

Shaking the Tree has finally moved into its new home—a bare-bones warehouse with soaring ceilings—which we’re hoping ever-industrious director Samantha Van Der Merwe converts into a hot and humid New Orleans garden. Shaking the Tree, 823 SE Grant Ave., 235-0635, shaking-thetree.com. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 5 pm Sundays, April 3-May 2. $10-$25, free for ages 19 and under.

243-2122

THEATER The Snowstorm

As part of Fertile Ground—an 11-day spree of locally produced new works—pianist Eric Nordin and choreographer Jessica Wallenfels collaborate on an original piece of dance theater, inspired by an Alexander Pushkin story about a woman left at the altar during a snowstorm. Nordin will play a live piano score by Rachmaninoff as an eightmember cast performs a tale of loss and romance in 19th-century Russia. CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 220-2646, cohoproductions.org. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays, Jan. 16-Feb. 7. $15-$25.

COURTESY OF PETE

The Undiscovered Country

ENTER THE NIGHT

Enter the Night

Maria Irene Fornes has written more than 40 plays—she’s currently 84 and suffering from Alzheimer’s disease—but the Cuban-born playwright is rarely produced outside avant-garde circles. Portland Experimental Theatre Ensemble, known for staging some of the more adventurous work in town, presents 1993’s Enter the Night, about three friends navigating big issues—gender, sexuality, love, death—in formally spare ways. In a promising move, PETE has brought in New York director Alice Reagan, who’s skilled at energizing challenging material and harnessing strangeness to her advantage. Shaking the Tree, 823 SE Grant Ave., petensemble.org. 7:30 pm ThursdaysSundays, Jan. 24-Feb. 8. $15-$40.

The Night Alive

Irish dramatist Conor McPherson writes plays marked by muck, menace and loneliness. But he’s compassionate, too, as in The Night Alive. The celebrated 2013 play centers on Tommy, a middle-aged, slovenly Dubliner who takes in a young woman—a sometime prostitute with an abusive boyfriend—and gets a tad more than he bargained for. With the dynamic Bruce Burkhartsmeier and Michael O’Connell in the cast, this Third Rail production should be resonant and rewarding. CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 235-1101, thirdrailrep.org. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays, Feb. 20-March 14. $22-$29.

Ambitious young playwright D.C. Copeland moved to Portland from New York a year ago, and this spring marks the first local production of one of her full-length works. Made up of three interwoven stories about addiction, the play is set in Portland and explores love, trauma and redemption through an absurdist lens. Back Door Theater, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 481-2960, defunktheatre.com. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Sundays, May 8-June 13. “Pay what you can” ThursdaysSundays; $15-$25 sliding scale Fridays-Saturdays.

Mr. Burns, a Post-Electric Play

Portland loves its native sons and daughters.

So it’s no small delight that Portland Playhouse has snagged the regional premiere of Anne Washburn’s much-discussed and generally adored 2013 comedy, set in a post-apocalyptic world where people sustain themselves by recounting episodes of The Simpsons. Show creator Matt Groening, of course, grew up in Portland, and Washburn herself went to Reed College. Portland Playhouse, 602 NE Prescott St., 488-5822, portlandplayhouse.org. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays, May 13-June 7. $20-$36.

Instead of bothering with Lauren Weedman’s needless reprise of People’s Republic of Portland, go see Portland Center Stage wrangle some star power in a more interesting way, as Grimm cast members Sasha Roiz and Silas Weir Mitchell appear in Richard Greenberg’s play about architecture, fame, betrayal and complicated family legacies. Here’s hoping they can keep up when no mythological creatures are involved. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Saturdays, 2 and 7:30 pm Sundays and noon Thursdays, May 17-June 21. $34-$74.

So yeah, John Mulaney’s TV show blows. But the SNL writer is still a delightfully entertaining comic whose expertly crafted stories—about childhood bullying, Xanax and the bewildering use of “bozo” in tabloid headlines—are sharp and spirited. And if you’re in the mood for a good squeal, don’t miss his “Ask a Grown Man” video on Rookie, in which he addresses slut-shaming, breakups and Casablanca. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694, aladdin-theater. com. 7 and 10 pm Thursday, Feb. 19. $27-$30.

Under 21 permitted with parent or legal guardian.

W. Kamau Bell

He hit Portland twice in 2014, but if you didn’t catch W. Kamau Bell then, see him for a mere $15 at this Funny Over Everything showcase. Bell hosted FX’s much-missed Totally Biased, and he has a way of riffing about race and politics that’s at once generous and incisive. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 281-4215, hollywoodtheatre. org. 8 pm Wednesday, Jan. 21. $15. All ages.

Suddenly Last Summer

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

John Mulaney

COMEDY

Allen Nause, former artistic director of Artists Rep, has been wanting to direct Ayad Akhtar’s political thriller—the plot encompasses Islamic terrorism and the global investment market— for several years, but the production kept getting shelved. Perhaps the wait was a good one. Even after winning a Pulitzer Prize in 2013 (for Disgraced, another play that explores Islamophobia and identity politics), Akhtar has continued to rework the script of The Invisible Hand. Nause directed the play for Seattle’s ACT Theatre in September and received glowing reviews, and now he’s bringing most of the cast south. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278, artistsrep.org. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Sundays and 2 pm Sundays, March 10-April 5. $25-$49.

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you should be. Because in addition to calling out Cosby as a rapist, Buress has an infectious and unpredictable standup style, co-hosts The Eric Andre Show, and on Broad City plays Lincoln— Ilana’s dentist fuckbuddy—with deadpan charm and puppy-dog patience. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694, aladdin-theater. com. 7 and 10 pm Tuesday, Feb. 17. $22-$25. 21+.

Three Days of Rain

The Invisible Hand

Stark, torrid and lyrical, Tennessee Williams’ 1958 one-act examines the aftermath of an American boy’s mysterious death in Spain. That tragic event left his cousin prone to insane babbling, which in turn has put her at the mercy of the boy’s imperious mother. After some delays in the fall,

TIED UP: White Bird presents Dance Theatre of Harlem on April 21-22.

Amy Schumer

FREDERICK M. BROWN

A ND

HANNIBAL BURESS

Hannibal Buress

Unless your name is Bill Cosby, you’re probably a fan of Hannibal Buress. And if you’re not,

The effusive star of Inside Amy Schumer gets a lot of attention for her raunchy sex material, but this potty mouth is also an advocate of free speech and gender equality: We can thank her for the word “pussy” now being allowed on Comedy Central. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 8 pm Friday, March 20. $46.50-$54.50.

DANCE White Bird

Dance presenter White Bird has a pretty spectacular spring season lined up, with highlights that include Nederlands Dans Theater 2 and Dance Theatre of Harlem. The former, a young and innovative branch of the larger, internationally acclaimed Nederlands Dans Theater, features ballet performances by 16 dancers between the ages of 17 and 22. One piece is set in a dream world, with dancers wearing unsettling, almost animalistic contact lenses, while another piece deals with cacti. Dance Theatre of Harlem, returning to Portland after a 30-year-absence, performs work by the likes of Ulysses Dove, Tanya Wideman and Thaddeus Davis, all known for their fast and forceful but fluid movements. All shows at the Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 245-1600, whitebird.org. Nederlands Dans Theater 2 is at 7:30 pm Wednesday, Feb. 11.

Dance Theatre of Harlem is at 7:30 pm TuesdayWednesday, April 21-22. All shows $26-$68.

Portland ValenTango

One of this city’s two tango festivals, ValenTango draws 15 instructors from around the world, including Portland native Dominic Bridge and

Buenos Aires’ Luciano Brigante, a runnerup in the salon category at the 2004 World Tango Dance Tournament. Now in its 18th year, ValenTango offers 49 classes and milongas galore. But your best chance to see the experts is at Friday’s Traditional Milonga or Saturday’s Grande Ball. Most events at the DoubleTree Hilton, 1000 NE Multnomah Blvd. Feb. 18-23.

More info at valentango.us.

Oregon Ballet Theatre

It’s a mix of classical and contemporary at Oregon Ballet Theatre this spring. First, the company tackles Ben Stevenson’s Cinderella (Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St.). Set to a theatrical score by Sergei Prokofiev, Stevenson brings colorful sets, slapstick comedy and plenty of sparkle to the beloved fairy tale, with principal Xuan Cheng trying on the glass slipper. A month later comes a program called Impact, featuring work performed by dancers in both the professional company and in new youth troupe OBT2 (Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway). On the bill: Dennis Spaight’s vibrant 1993 work Crayola, Nacho Duato’s Rassemblement, and a world premiere by Darrell Grand Moultrie, perhaps best known for creating choreography for Beyoncé.

Cinderella runs Feb. 28-March 7. Impact runs April 16-25. More info at 222-5538 or obt.org. $30-$160.

Northwest Dance Project

In Louder Than Words, the contemporary chamber company premieres a yet-unnamed piece by Ihsan Rustem—whose last work with NWDP, the graceful and precise State of Matter, won the Sadler’s Wells Global Dance Contest in 2011—and revisits two of its favorite works.

Artistic director Sarah Slipper’s Casual Act, based on Harold Pinter’s Betrayal, is a theatrical piece that tells an emotionally fraught tale of extramarital affairs on a (literally) revolving set. For the other reprise, NWDP stretches back a bit farther, to Lucas Crandall’s 2008 Blue, a vigorous fullcompany ballet inspired by Rodin’s sculptures.

Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 421-7434, nwdanceproject.org. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, March 19-21. $29-$52.

BodyVox

In Cosmosis, BodyVox takes its usual mix of dance, theater, film and mirth and adds a dash of chamber music. The live musical stylings of the Amphion String Quartet—a New York mini-chamber orchestra noted by the New York Times for its “brand of fierce, sharply directed energy”—are sure to add even more color to Jamey Hampton and Ashley Roland’s choreography. BodyVox Dance Center, 1201 NW 17th Ave., 229-0627. May 21-30. $25 and up.

DEC. 31–JAN. 6 = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead.

C O U R T E S Y O F N O R T H W E S T C L A S S I C A L T H E AT R E C O M PA N Y

Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. Theater: REBECCA JACOBSON (rjacobson@wweek.com). Dance: KAITIE TODD (dance@wweek.com).

TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: rjacobson@wweek.com.

PERFORMANCE

ALE XA WILE Y & THE WILDE RNE SS FRIDAY, 1/9 @ 6PM

Lambert St., 286-3456. 7 pm Fridays and 2 and 4 pm Saturdays-Sundays through Jan. 4. Free.

Alexa Wiley is expanding her musical landscape with her latest project, Alexa Wiley & the Wilderness. Paired with the Wilderness’ virtuosity, and special guests, the ensemble creates a superb sonic lyricism that might be described as wild metaphorical music that rocks.

The Maid’s Tragedy

Francis Beaumont and John Fletcher’s rarely staged 1619 revenge play The Maid’s Tragedy is like film noir in both its fixation on female sexuality and its resolutely bleak atmosphere. Hapless hero Amintor (Steve Vanderzee) faces a simple, ferocious situation: He discovers on his wedding night that his new marriage is a sham, cooked up by the wicked king to preserve his own secret affair with Amintor’s bride Evadne (Brenan Dwyer).

In Northwest Classical Theatre’s incisive production, the poisonous atmosphere is apparent even before Amintor and Evadne face off beside their marriage bed. From the opening scene, as stalwart war hero Melantius (Tom Walton) declares himself unsuited to the peacetime life he’s reentering, the spectacle of unchecked violence pulses underneath each well-turned witticism and polished manipulation.

Under Barry Kyle’s assured direction, the company stages a feverish party en route to the charnel house. The supporting cast, sporting increasingly pallid and expressionistic makeup, offer some diverting turns—particularly memorable are Melissa Whitney as spurned lover Aspatia, sullenly blocking out her environment with headphones, and Matthew Dieckman as giddy courtier Diphilus. Walton and Vanderzee seethe at the corruption surrounding them, but it’s Dwyer as Evadne, alternately haughty and tormented, who makes this production incandescent. JOHN BEER. Shoebox Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 971-2443740. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through Jan. 4. $20-$22.

N A OM I T

SUNDAY, 1/11 @ 5PM A presence in the Pacific NW music scene since the age of six, Naomi T is an awardwinning singer and multi-instrumentalist.

Despite being a self-titled “Diva,” Naomi has a good-humored and up-front style which only adds to the shock when her audiences hear the first note of her aweinspiring vocals.

MUSIC MILLENNIUM RECOMMENDS

JACK BRUCE

Rockpalast: The 50th Birthday Concerts In 1993, Jack Bruce celebrated his 50th birthday with a two-day all-star concert at the E-Werk in Cologne, Germany featuring Simon Phillips and former Cream bandmate Ginger Baker (both on drums), ParliamentFunkadelic keyboardist Bernie Worrell and guitarists Gary Moore and Clem Clempson, among others.

3 versions sale priced at: 2 DVD BOXSET - 19.99 2 DVD + 1 CD - 21.99 3 DVD + CD - 28.99

Mary Poppins

BEHIND THE CURTAIN: THE MAID’S TRAGEDY plays at Northwest Classical Theatre Company through Jan. 4.

THEATER OPENINGS & PREVIEWS NT Live: Of Mice and Men

Don’t want to watch James Franco shamelessly mugging as a TV talk show host tasked with assassinating Kim Jong-un? Go see him in a highdef screening of this Broadway production of John Steinbeck’s novella, in which he plays dreamer George opposite Chris O’Dowd’s Lennie.

The show got mixed reviews, which prompted Franco to call New York Times theater critic Ben Brantley “a little bitch.” Sigh. World Trade Center Theater, 121 SW Salmon St., 235-1101. 2 and 7 pm SaturdaySunday, Jan. 3-4. $15-$20.

Story Swap and Potluck

An evening of free-form storytelling hosted by the Portland Storytellers Guild. McMenamins Kennedy School, 5736 NE 33rd Ave., 249-3983. 6:30 pm every first Friday. Free.

ALSO PLAYING Blithe Spirit

Death is entirely a laughing matter.

At least, that’s the case in Artists Rep’s production of Blithe Spirit, directed by Christopher Liam Moore. Noël Coward’s 1941 comedy finds well-to-do author Charles (Michael Mendelson) inviting the spacy psychic Madame Arcati (Vana O’Brien) to his home for a séance as research for a novel he’s writing.

But the joke’s on him: The séance accidentally summons the spirit of Elvira (Sara Hennessy), Charles’ bratty first wife, who’s been dead for seven years. Charles is the only

one who can see or hear her, which leads to a slew of gags wherein his current wife, the stern Ruth (Jill Van Velzer), mistakes his jabs at Elvira for comments directed at her. Most of the humor, though, is faster and more novel. Charles—played with a perfect mix of snark and charm

by Mendelson—is as clever as he is cruel. “You’re not the dying sort,” he quips to Ruth. The couple’s flighty maid (Val Landrum) supplies no shortage of humor, whether shrieking the names of visitors or sprinting through the house. Posh accents and a lavish set—marble floors, chandeliers, giant bookcase—all denote that it’s a period piece, but the brisk pacing allows this production to skirt Merchant-Ivory languor.

Blink and you’ll miss a bit. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 2411278. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Sundays and 2 pm Sundays through Jan. 4. $25-$55.

Frogz

Imago’s long-running extravaganza, which has toured the world and spent time on Broadway, returns for the holidays. It’s a family-friendly, fantastical show featuring elaborate costumes and impressive acrobatics.

If you’re raising kids in Portland, it’s basically required viewing—and for good reason. Imago Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., 231-3959. Many showtimes through Jan. 4. See imagotheatre. com for schedule. $17.50-$34.50.

The Hullabaloo: Frankenstein, the Little Monster

For the 10th year running, Jane A Theater Company presents a family-friendly romp filled with singing, dancing and a wee monster running amok. Post5 Theatre, 1666 SE

Northwest Children’s Theatre presents a musical version of the classic tale, which draws from P.L. Travers’ original stories and the Disney film.

NW Neighborhood Cultural Center, 1819 NW Everett St., 222-4480.

Noon and 4 pm Saturdays-Sundays (and some Mondays and Tuesdays) through Jan. 4. $17-$23.

The Mystery of Irma Vep

Third Rail’s The Mystery of Irma Vep leaves little doubt about one thing: Co-stars Isaac Lamb and Leif Norby have got chops. Charles Ludlam’s 1984 cross-dressing romp—two actors, seven characters, countless costume changes—requires its performers to juggle wildly divergent accents and attitudes across a nonsensical storyline that draws from Hitchcock’s Rebecca, Wuthering Heights, schlocky horror movies and Victorian penny-dreadfuls. There are werewolves, vampires and one very horny Egyptian mummy. And Lamb and Norby, two Portland stalwarts, gallop through the proceedings with remarkable ease and evident glee.

But for all its giddiness, the show doesn’t go anywhere. In his director’s notes, Philip Cuomo describes Irma Vep as ridiculous, but there’s little here that actually qualifies as such. Unlike, say, Noises Off—Third Rail’s comedic caper of choice last winter—Ludlam’s play fails to build.

Instead, it relies on knowingly terrible puns and campy mugging, and Lamb and Norby are only too happy to oblige: In the second act, they crawl across audience members’ laps and steal sips of wine (“Don’t worry, I don’t have Ebola,” quips Lamb). Despite a few exuberant moments, including some amusing repetition of “Total Eclipse of the Heart,” the real mystery of Irma Vep remains unsolved: Why would the normally savvy Third Rail bother with such a shopworn clunker?

REBECCA JACOBSON. Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 2351101. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through Jan. 10. $24-$47.

CONT. on page 38 Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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PERFORMANCE

DEC. 31–JAN. 6

COMEDY & VARIETY The Best of Curious

Curious Comedy presents a comedic smorgasbord of its favorite shows from 2014. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 7:30 pm Friday-Saturday, Jan. 2-3. $12-$15.

Cameron Esposito

The woman who’s been called “the future of comedy” by Jay Leno returns to Portland—she was here in May to record her insightful, triumphant first album, Same Sex Symbol—for a one-night stand. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 7 pm Saturday, Jan. 3. Sold out. 21+.

Control Yourself: A Showcase of Funny

In one year, JoAnn Schinderle—an effervescent and engaging comic from the Midwest—has built her twice-monthly showcase into one of the prime spots in Portland to catch top-notch standup. Tonight, the showcase celebrates its first birthday with standup from the likes of Curtis Cook, Amy Miller and Sean Jordan (who all have received the Funniest 5 stamp of approval), as well as some special Skype guests. Alberta Street Pub, 1036 NE Alberta St., 284-7665. 9 pm Sunday, Jan. 4. Free. 21+.

Dan Cummins

The Idaho-born comedian—known for his two comedy albums, Revenge Is Near and Crazy With a Capital F, and for making the latenight rounds—hits Portland for three nights of standup, including two shows on New Year’s Eve. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 and 10:30 pm Wednesday and 7:30 and 10 pm Friday-Saturday, Dec. 31 and Jan. 2-3. $20-$75. 21+.

Diabolical Experiments

Improv jam show featuring Brody performers and other locals. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 2242227. 7 pm every Sunday. $5.

Fly-Ass Jokes

Standup from five comics hailing from both Portland and farther afield. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm Friday, Jan. 2. $8.

Funny Humans vs. the Wheel

If you go to enough shows around town, you start to memorize comedians’ sets. Think of this weekly show, hosted by silly duo Adam Pasi and David Mascorro, as an antidote to all that repetition: Comedians start out with a planned set, but halfway through, they have to spin a wheel to determine what comes next—crowd work, one-liners, maybe even a heckle battle. Bar of the Gods, 4801 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 2322037. 9 pm every Sunday. Free. 21+.

It’s Gonna Be Okay

Hosted by the ever-chipper Barbara Holm, this twice-monthly showcase is a prime spot to catch top local comics, as well as the occasional out-of-towner. The cozy basement room is almost always packed, and Holm often tosses out prizes—plastic dinosaur figurines, comic books—to audience members. Also: free skeeball afterward. EastBurn, 1800 E Burnside St., 236-2876. 8:30 pm every first and third Monday. Free. 21+.

The Liberators

Some of Portland’s most established and most consistently entertaining improvisers put on their first show of 2015. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, theliberators.net.

7:30 pm Saturday, Jan. 3. $13-$15.

New Year’s Eve Extravaganza

Ring in 2015 with sketch, standup, improv and aerial feats—and also snacks, a midnight champagne toast and dancing into the wee

38

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

hours. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 4779477. 8 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $50-$60.

Open Court

Team-based, long-form improv open to audience members and performers of all stripes. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 7:30 pm every Thursday. $5.

The P&J Show

Post5 puts on a special holiday installment of its monthly variety show, featuring short acts from, uh, just about anyone who volunteers— joke tellers, drag performers, sketch comics, whatever. The bar is open, and drinking is encouraged. The party starts at 9 pm, with the show beginning at 10 pm. DJ’d dance party to follow. Post5 Theatre, 1666 SE Lambert St., 971-258-8584. 9 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. Free.

Random Acts of Comedy

A freewheeling show that brings together sketch, standup and improv. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 4779477. 9:30 pm Saturdays. $7-$10.

A Very Brody New Year

The Brody rings in 2015 with two hours of tightly curated standup, sketch and improv. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $16.

DANCE Burlesque S’il Vous Plait

This month’s installment of Burlesque S’il Vous Plait—titled Get a Load of This—switches things up with an (almost) all-male lineup.

Atop the slate is Portland’s newest boylesque dance troupe, Cocked & Loaded. The show features performances by the troupe’s founder, naked contemporary dancer Tod Alan, as well as by local burlesquer Romeo Bedwell, PDX Dance Collective member Gabriel and glittery guest Jaxin Yoff.

Jayla Rose, a founding member of Caravan of Glam, breaks up the sausagefest with a gymnastics-inspired act. Crush, 1400 SE Morrison St, 235-8150. 9:30 pm Friday, Jan. 2. $12. 21+.

NYE Black and White Ball

Portland native Kumari Suraj brings a little taste of New York to town, ringing in 2015 with an extravagant black-and-white dress code and three runway-style dance competitions. Suraj is known for bringing national attention to waacking, a disco-era dance style that incorporates striking arm movements and vibrant personality. The competition categories include waacking, voguing and “sex siren,” and it’s open to the community—new and veteran dancers alike. Following the competition, local boylesque performer Isaiah Esquire performs, while Mother Michelle St. Laurant impersonates the Queen B herself.

They’re joined by local dance troupe House of Aquarius and L.A.based DJ Josh Peace. Service, 2319 NE Glisan St. 9 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. $50. 21+.

SundaePDX New Year’s Eve Party

As the cherry on top of a year of ice cream-fueled breakdancing parties, DJ Wicked and the rest of the Sundae crew throw a final bash in 2014, with no cover and lots of dancing. Inspired by the daytime patio parties of Los Angeles, Sundae events emphasize spontaneous breakdance battles and a casual vibe. Tonight’s lineup features three DJs, a flexible dress code (go casual or fancy) and a free champagne toast. Facebook RSVP required. Pub at the End of the Universe, 4107 SE 28th Ave., 235-0969. 9 pm Wednesday, Dec. 31. 21+.

For more Performance listings, visit

DEC. 31–JAN. 6

Diane Avio-Augee and Carola Penn

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

By RICHARD SPEER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rspeer@wweek.com.

Pictorially, you couldn’t get further apart than painters Diane Avio-Augee and Carola Penn, who headline a new two-person show at Mark Woolley.

Avio-Augee paints abstractly with a vocabulary of organic shapes, drips and creamy impasto. Penn, on the other hand, paints representationally, often focusing on forest scenes. Her compositions teem with ferns, arcing trees and boldly colored leaves. The painters’ visions are so disparate they’re strangely complementary, making for a soothing and satisfying double bill. Through Jan. 11. Mark Woolley Gallery @ Pioneer, 700 SW 5th Ave., 3rd floor, Pioneer Place Mall, 998-4152.

Emily Hanna Wyant: Gotta Make Money to Make Money

Earlier this year, as artist Emily Hanna Wyant tells it, she was pitching her conceptual artwork to local galleries. She kept getting the same polite “no thanks” from gallerist after gallerist. “We love what you do,” they said, “but it’s not work we could sell in a gallery.” So Wyant decided to turn the metaphorical lemon into lemonade, creating a new body of work critiquing the object- and salesobsessed gallery system. Tongue firmly in cheek, she has churned out dozens upon dozens of faux gold bricks, as if to flip galleries a collective bird. “Here you go,” the installation seems to shout, “a pile of tangible objects with a fixed monetary value—will that do?” This installation, entitled Counterfeit Gold Bricks, is comprised of “gold bullion” made out of spray-painted wood and cement. Other pieces, such as WuTang Clan, continue the anti-materialist riff via imagery drawn from the bling-flaunting world of hip-hop music. Through Jan. 16. Nisus Gallery, 8371 N Interstate Ave., Suite 1, 8061427.

Forbidden Fruit: Chris Antemann at Meissen

CENTRAL~LATTICE TOOL ARRAY

BY BRENNA MURPHY

Brenna Murphy: Central~Lattice Tool Array

Brenna Murphy returns to Upfor with a suite of diminutive sculptures, some of them printed with a 3-D printer and others finished with a black, lacquer-like sheen. The sculptures are displayed on a bed of silvery, reflective foil, alternating with prints of abstract vegetal motifs. With their calligraphic contours, the sculptures resemble kanji characters. Murphy supplements the installation with a video loop in which an orchid seemingly swells and dissolves into psychedelic tracers. The artist calls her

exhibition “a glyphic, labyrinthian, hyper-dimensional circuit,” whatever that means. “I am building systems,” she says, “and pouring my mind through them like thread through a loom.” That’s colorful language that the show doesn’t quite live up to. In fact, the show suffers by comparison to Murphy’s 2013 collaboration with Birch Cooper, Liquid Hand. That exhibition featured similar imagery but more interactive elements, such as viewer-controlled buzzers and colored lights. Through Jan. 17. Upfor Gallery, 929 NW Flanders St., 2275111.

In a long-overdue follow-up to her delightful installation at the 2011 Contemporary Northwest Art Awards, Chris Antemann stages a rococo bacchanal in the Portland Art Museum.

Her porcelain figures fill a mirrored antechamber, engaging in all manner of languid frivolty. In the sprawling sculpture Love Temple, they sit around—and in some cases, crawl on—a lavishly appointed dining table, some of them naked, some clad only in the skimpiest suggestion of diaphanous fabric. Antemann accents the figures’ white skin with delicate golden lines. Although her revelers, with their powdered wigs and rouged cheeks, are a little too one-note in their appearance to sustain the viewer’s attention, perhaps that is on purpose.

After all, 24-hour party people, whether in the 18th century or the 21st, begin to all look the same after the ninth or 10th flute of champagne.

Through Feb. 8. Portland Art Museum, 1219 SW Park Ave., 226-0973.

Michael Vahrenwald: The People’s Trust

Photographer Michael Vahrenwald’s images of derelict bank buildings are agreeably creepy. Vahrenwald has a knack for capturing telling details: the lonely shrub growing in the cornice of a once-august edifice, or the garish red and green paint that turn the columns and Greek-key motifs of a different building into funhouse parodies of monumental architecture. Another bank has been turned into a store called Jaye Dee’s Mart, whose sign proffers “Ice Cold Beer, Hot Sandwiches, Lottery and Liquor.”

Between the columns of these banks is the story of a fall from grace— from robber-baron caché to skidrow déclassé. As the global recession of 2008 demonstrated all too well, banks are anything but beacons of stability. And as the old saying goes, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. Through Jan. 3. Hap Gallery, 916 NW Flanders St., 444-7101.

Michael Vahrenwald: The People’s Trust

A century ago, when money was money and banks were spelled with a capital “B,” architects built banks with towering columns and statuary to communicate the ideals of stability and tradition. Today, many of the great banks of the last century have closed, their headquarters replaced by cheap shops and restaurants. Photographer Michael Vahrenwald has captured images reflecting this incongruity: staid former bank buildings, their names still chiseled in granite, now inhabited by pawn shops, Payless stores, an El Rancho Mexican restaurant and shops for auto parts, wigs and liquor.

The pictures fit firmly into the “ruinsporn” genre, in which photographers fetishize cities such as Detroit, whose once-bustling economies have given way to urban decline. Through Jan. 3. Hap Gallery, 916 NW Flanders St., 444-7101.

Sightings

If you’ve ever been to one of those cheesy rotating restaurants on top of a tall building, you’ll understand the conceit behind Messica Mallios’ video installation, Tower of the Americas.

Mallios has set up a camera in front of the window of a rotating observation tower in San Antonio, Texas.

The camera focuses not on the view outside, but on the glass window itself, with all its smudges, cracks and dried Windex drips. By honing in on these imperfections, the artist invokes a dreary bathos: the intrusion of mundanity into an otherwise exalted vista. Paired with Kevin Cooley’s video installation, Skyward, Mallios’ contribution makes for a strong double-bill in curator-in-residence Rachel Adams’ second show at Disjecta. Through Jan. 4. Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate Ave., 286-9449.

The Big 500

It’s called The Big 500, but this annual mega-show actually features work by 600 artists from the Pacific Northwest. Each piece measures only 8 inches by 8 inches, and each sells for only $40. Partnering with the Mark Woolley, Po Boy Art, and Artist in Residence galleries, Peoples Art of Portland is displaying a staggering 6,000 works of art spanning every conceivable medium. The artists range from established gallery stars to graffiti artists making their gallery debuts. This is the show’s seventh consecutive year. It’s strategically timed for connoisseurs as well as rank-and-file mallgoers to shop for objets d’art to give as holiday gifts. Art snobs might grouse that the show prioritizes quantity over quality, but as a wide sampling of artwork by artists throughout the region, it’s hard to beat The Big 500. Through Jan. 11. People’s Gallery, Pioneer Place Mall, 700 SW 5th Ave., 3rd floor, Suite 4005.

Through the Lens: Portraiture & Self-portraiture

Nan Goldin is one of the world’s most celebrated photographers, but her piece in Liz Leach’s new portrait show is a dud. Entitled Self-portrait on the Train, Boston-New Haven, it shows Goldin gazing vacantly out the train’s window at a blurred landscape. Generic and facile, it belies the artist’s long-standing reputation for confrontational imagery. Happily, there are many more invigorating artworks here, among them David Hilliard’s triptych, Eric Discerning.

It’s an intimate masterpiece of alternating sharp and fuzzy focus, with a subject whose intense, asymmetrical eyes communicate an air of enigma. In Miriam Crying II, Berlin, photographer Robert Lyon shows a freckle-faced model in a moment of emotional vulnerability, her eyes welling with tears. She’s in a very different mood in Grand Hotel, Kairo, reclining seductively and shooting the camera a come-hither stare.

Finally, Arne Svenson’s Neighbors #9 and #10 (Diptych) counterpose a shot of a modernist apartment with a silhouette of a man seen through a window. The man’s talking to someone, either in person or on the phone—hard to tell which from the angle—and his posture seems aggressive. Why is he angry, and what is he about to do? As a viewer, you’re left rapt by the scene. Lyon has shown us just enough information to leave us wanting more. Through Jan. 3.

Elizabeth Leach Gallery, 417 NW 9th Ave., 224-0521.

FOR more Movie listings, visit

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DEC. 31–JAN. 6 AP FILM STUDIES

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

C O U R T E S Y O F C L I N TO N S T R E E T T H E AT E R

MOVIES

Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rjacobson@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

OPENING THIS WEEK The Woman in Black 2: Angel of Death

Alas, Daniel Radcliffe isn’t back in this supernatural horror sequel, presumably because he’s spent more than enough time in creaky countryside houses. PG13. Cornelius, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

STILL SHOWING Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Steve Carell and Jennifer Garner star in a Disney adaptation of the popular kids’ book. PG. Avalon, Kennedy School, Milwaukie, Mission, Mt. Hood, Valley.

Annie

C+ Rebooting a franchise can shed new light on a story. Take Annie: In director Will Gluck’s version, the plucky, white orphan is now a plucky, African-American foster kid, played by 10-year-old Oscar nominee Quvenzhané Wallis. Cruel orphanage caretaker Miss Hannigan (Cameron Diaz) is now an abusive ex-C C Music Factory member/foster-home runner. Daddy Warbucks is Michael Bloomberg—er, a wildly wealthy cellphone mogul named Will Stacks (Jamie Foxx) who’s running for mayor of New York. Stacks and Annie run into each other (literally), she falls down, and he pulls her out of the street. His campaign team persuades him to take Annie in to pad his paltry polling numbers. Such references to the Machiavellian state of American politics make this Annie feel necessary.

But at the end of the day, Annie needs to entertain kids. Whether the fault of the director or her own inexperience, Wallis’ performance is one-note. And save “It’s the Hard Knock Life,” which borrows the beat of Jay-Z’s 1998 version, the singing and dancing are lukewarm: “You’re Never Fully Dressed Without a Smile” sounds like it belongs in an iPod commercial. Annie’s updates are smart and fun, but with the iconic songs whittled to husks of their former selves, they’ve got nothing to stand on. PG. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

The Babadook

A- Dressed in a flowing trench coat

and tattered black hat, the apparition in the superb Aussie creeper The Babadook immediately lodges itself in your nightmares. First glimpsed in an Edward Gorey-esque pop-up book, the titular monster is like an unholy combination of a vaudevillian clown and Jack the Ripper. But what sets director Jennifer Kent’s debut film apart from standard creature features—and elevates it into the realm of horror art—is that even if this ghostly menace never appeared, The Babadook would still be a gorgeous, heartbreaking exercise in dread. The spare, haunting and often tragic horror drama centers on Amelia (Essie Davis), a nerve-jangled nurse still reeling from the death of her husband, who was killed while driving her to the hospital when she was in labor. Seven years later, Amelia and her son, Samuel (Noah Wiseman), lead a lonely and sleepless existence.

Kent allows much of her film to play out in the shadows, creating a sense of claustrophobic paranoia and lunacy that makes The Babadook one of the most emotionally affecting pieces of macabre cinema in years. AP KRYZA. Hollywood Theatre.

Big Eyes

B- For Margaret Keane, “eyes are the

window to the soul.” At least, that’s the drivel the artist (a blond-wigged Amy Adams) has to deliver in Tim Burton’s Big Eyes, a biopic that winds up wanting for both vision and soul.

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It’s got the makings of a rich story: In the late ’50s and early ’60s, Keane churned out hundreds of paintings of sad, saucer-eyed waifs. Art critics lambasted the work as sentimental kitsch, but the public adored it. And Margaret got none of the credit. Her husband, Walter (Christoph Waltz)—a charming huckster and self-deluded egotist—presented himself as the artist. It wasn’t until years later, when Margaret sued Walter for slander, that the truth emerged. As he did in Ed Wood 20 years ago, Burton has fashioned a portrait of an earnest artist producing work of dubious value. But unlike in that film, the director won’t let himself sink into strangeness. In only one scene, when Margaret looks around a grocery store and sees gargantuan peepers on every face, does Big Eyes begin to soar into surrealism. More often, it’s tiresome, and Burton skims over thorny questions—the populist craze for kitsch, gendered expectations in art, the line between highbrow and lowbrow. Adams, though sympathetic, is too often reduced to quivery, weepy anxiety. Waltz won two Oscars playing highly charismatic men, but here he’s cartoonishly deranged.

Apparently the real-life Walter Keane was even more of a nutjob, but that doesn’t forgive Waltz’s screen-smothering performance. PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cinema 21, Movies on TV.

Big Hero 6

A Shelving wordy cleverness for its

own sake, ignoring parental intrusion, and allowing moral lessons to develop organically through a simplified storyline, Big Hero 6 is that rarest thing: an animated children’s adventure designed purely to delight its target audience. Substantial swaths of the picture are devoted to nothing loftier than portraying just how unstoppably cool soaring on the back of your own robot would feel. Big Hero 6 opens in the mean streets of San Fransokyo, where Tadashi narrowly saves his little brother Hiro from a beating after the 14-year-old prodigy wins fistfuls of cash during back-alley ‘bot fights.

The appeal of superherodom isn’t even suggested until an explosion kills Tadashi, but, upon discovering a nano-tech project has been stolen for shadowy ends, what’s a boy to do but weaponize his brother’s adorably puffy health care robot and outfit his goofball lab mates as newly minted misfit warriors of science? PG. JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Indoor Twin, Movies on TV.

Birdman

B- In Birdman, our protagonist is Riggan Thomson (Michael Keaton), a washed-up actor who once wore wings as the titular superhero. But in this film, the real thing with wings is the camera, which soars and swoops through narrow stairwells and bustling Manhattan streets. The effect is that of a single, continuous take. But just as the camera floats along, so too does much else in this self-consciously clever film skate along the surface.

R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Hollywood Theatre.

The Book of Life

B- A transcendent flourish of four-

color splendor and kinetic verve, new animated feature The Book of Life arrives overstuffed with artisanal delights, including the world’s grandest piñata. But, while the picaresque drollery will surely draw crowds, the film is still hollow, disposable and a shameless waste of candy. PG. JAY HORTON. Avalon, Milwaukie, Mt. Hood.

The Boxtrolls

C+ As in Laika’s previous two efforts— the fantastical Coraline and playfully supernatural ParaNorman—The Boxtrolls boasts a scrupulously crafted world. But its overstuffed screenplay lacks humor, and it could use a

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

CONT. on page 41

ON ANOTHER PLANET: In Bill, the Galactic Hero, humans go to war with space reptiles.

PUNKS IN SPACE REPO MAN’S ALEX COX BLASTS OFF WITH BILL, THE GALACTIC HERO.

BY A P KRYZA

apkryza@wweek.com

Back in the early ’80s, Liverpudlian director Alex Cox had just finished his debut feature, Repo Man, a twisted punk-rock crime comedy starring Emilio Estevez. But the film had yet to become a breakaway cult hit, so the then-30-year-old optioned his next project: Harry Harrison’s 1965 anti-war sci-fi novel, Bill, the Galactic Hero.

Cox followed up Repo Man with two more certified punk classics: Clash-starring Western Straight to Hell and Sex Pistols biopic Sid and Nancy. But Bill? Well, that took 30 years.

Now a professor at the University of Colorado Boulder, Cox has finally brought Bill to life. It’s a student film—shot, cut, acted, you name it—by the school’s film department and funded by a $115,000 Kickstarter campaign.

Cox hits the Clinton Street at 7:30 pm on New Year’s Eve for the West Coast premiere of this bizarro tale about a reluctant astronaut battling space reptiles. He talked to WW about Bill, student filmmaking, and how his version of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas would have looked.

WW: What drew you to Bill, the Galactic Hero?

Alex Cox: It’s an authentically anti-war sci-fi novel.

There are others—The Forever War is one—but generally sci-fi movies take a very militaristic position (Starship Troopers, Ender’s Game, etc.). Unlike Orson Scott Card, [author Harry Harrison] had actually served and knew what bullshit it all was.

It’s billed as “the largest student film ever made.”

Harry and I came up with the idea as a way of making Bill inexpensively after our efforts to raise money via the conventional route failed. The deal was, nobody was to be paid while working on the film, and if a big studio came along and wanted to make their own version, they could do so simultaneously.

What roles did the students play?

Undergraduates and recent graduates of CU Boulder did everything—produced, acted, edited, did production design and sound design. I share

the director credit with six former students. The stakes were higher since no one apart from me and Iggy Pop [who wrote the theme] had ever worked on a feature film.

How did these students compare with you as a young director?

I don’t see much difference. They go fast, try to keep a happy atmosphere on set, are respectful of their cast and crew, know they don’t know everything, yet press forward anyway. They reminded me of me, as John Wayne said of Mattie Ross in True Grit.

Repo Man might be one of the era’s most enduring cult movies. Why do you think so?

It was authentically of its time and place, unlike the studio attempts—think Streets of Fire—to monetize youth culture.

You were slated to direct Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas until Hunter S. Thompson famously lost his shit over a proposed animated sequence during the “wave speech” segment. How would you have done things differently from Terry Gilliam?

It would all have been shot in single takes, because that was my style during those days. The cinematographer would have been Tom Richmond, who shot Straight to Hell, and I would have done the visual effects and animation with Tippett Studio [Robocop, Jurassic Park]. And I would have fired Johnny Depp on day one—the most overrated and childish actor I have ever met—and hired Alex Feldman or Jaimz Woolvett for the part.

ALSO SHOWING: Sequel Month kicks off with Die Hard 2, wherein the same thing happens to the same guy, just with more explosions and blood. Academy Theater. Jan. 2-8.

Blade Runner returns to ensure that despite the fact we’re inside, there are still tears in the rain. Hollywood Theatre. Jan. 2-7.

The theater lacks the necessary equipment to screen The Interview, but as its own little statement, the Clinton Street shows The Great Dictator, Charlie Chaplin’s “fuck you” to Hitler. Clinton Street Theater.

10:30 am and 1, 3:30, 6 and 8:30 pm Thursday, Jan. 1.

Andrei Tarkovsky’s final film, 1986’s The Sacrifice, follows a group of friends whose party on an isolated island is interrupted by the beginning of World War III. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Friday-Saturday and 4 pm Sunday, Jan 2-4.

B-Movie Bingo presents T-Force, about an elite group of cyborg counterterrorists with awesome haircuts. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Tuesday, Jan 6.

DEC. 31–JAN. 6

Boyhood

A Boyhood took 12 years, in film as

in life. For 12 years, director Richard Linklater shot the movie for a few weeks each summer as both the main character, a boy named Mason, and the actor, Ellar Coltrane, came of age, from 6 to 18. The epic undertaking has resulted in one of the most honest and absorbing representations of growing up ever put to film: all the tedium, all the wonder. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst Theater.

as the kind of plop you’d find Ashley Judd starring in back in the ’90s. It’s mesmerizing. R. AP KRYZA. Academy Theater, Avalon, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst Theater, Mission, Valley.

Guardians of the Galaxy

A- A strangely wonderful, thoroughly

enjoyable sci-fi romp. PG-13. JAY HORTON. Laurelhurst Theater.

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

B+ Prior to The Battle of the Five

on Dear White People, early drafts of the screenplay included an over-thetop college party featuring white students in blackface. At some point, though, he ruled it too outlandish and slashed it from the film. Then came the Compton Cookout at the University of California, San Diego, in 2010. The invitation promised chicken, watermelon and purple drank. Students showed up in heavy gold chains, oversized T-shirts and, yes, blackface. Simien quickly revived the party in Dear White People, and it’s one of many pieces that makes this college-set race satire so smart, gutsy and relevant. R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Academy Theater.

Armies, it would have been fair to say the Hobbit movies at their best were inferior to the Lord of the Rings films at their worst. This may not have been much of an issue for anyone whose fictional universe of choice is Middle-earth (read: this critic), but even apologists had to admit the first two installments were often sluggish, if enjoyable. There’s finally a genuine sense of breathless urgency to the concluding chapter, which pits man against dwarf against elf against orc in an elegantly crafted, altogether glorious skirmish for supremacy over the Lonely Mountain. Did The Hobbit need to be a trilogy? Absolutely not. Did it work as one anyway? Yes, precious.

PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Bagdad, Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Edgefield, Moreland, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Roseway, Sandy, St. Johns Cinemas.

Dumb and Dumber To

Horrible Bosses 2

Dear White People

A- When Justin Simien began work

B A fusillade of absurdist puns and

scatological taunts amid a Lifetime picture about two mildly disabled friends on an amiable, misguided quest. PG-13. JAY HORTON. Movies on TV.

Exodus: Gods and Kings

C- Ridley Scott’s spin on the tale of Moses and Ramesses is what a parody of a biblical epic might look like on Entourage. PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Movies on TV.

Fury

C Brad Pitt makes an inglorious return to Nazi-killing movies in Fury, David Ayer’s would-be epic about tank warfare in the waning days of World War II. Ayer sets up Fury as a gritty depiction of the Nazis’ “total war” period, when all civilians were ordered to aid in their country’s desperate efforts—which would be more effective if the director didn’t use these atrocities as little more than action-movie set pieces. R. MICHAEL NORDINE. Academy Theater, Kennedy School, Mt. Hood, Valley.

The Gambler

C Mark Wahlberg really, really wants an Oscar. And with The Gambler, he pursues it by employing every Academy-baiting trick short of transforming himself into a little black girl with a mental disability. Wahlberg lost 60 pounds for Rupert Wyatt’s remake of a 1974 James Caan vehicle because, well, acting. He plays Jim Bennett, an eccentric college professor by day and compulsive gambling junkie by night.

He has a strained relationship with his mother (Jessica Lange) and a romance with a precocious student (Brie Larsen). Trouble is, despite Wahlberg’s best efforts, it’s impossible to care about Bennett. He’s a horrible piece of shit who gets off on taking risks with other people’s money. So when he gets in over his head, you hope he gets whacked rather than redeemed.

It’s possible to make a great movie about terrible people: Just look at Nightcrawler. But with no real motivations to back up its slick production values, The Gambler is a rudderless film notable only for Wahlberg’s performance. R. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

Gone Girl

B+ Gone Girl might be David Fincher’s battiest work. The director has taken a lurid suspense yarn—the wildly popular novel by Gillian Flynn—and emerged with a film that deftly straddles the line between brilliant and stupid. It’s a media satire and a meditation on a volatile marriage that masquerades

B Three years after a trio of professionals conspired to murder their employers, Horrible Bosses 2 finds the B-list wolfpack (Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, Charlie Day) again nudged toward criminal vengeance. Where the original blanketed any satirical edge beneath formulaic conventions and indulgent star turns, new director Sean Anders’ unrepentant hackiness dispels any semblance of narrative construct.

Instead, he throws all his energies behind his leads’ banter-driven interplay, which works undeserved miracles.

R. JAY HORTON. Eastport, Clackamas, Movies on TV.

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay, Part 1 B- When last we met Katniss

Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence), the bow-wielding heroine was being rescued from the eponymous death match and thrust into the role of reluctant revolutionary. Now, in the first half of The Hunger Games’ concluding installment, Katniss’ outlying District 12 has been reduced to ashen rubble. The Games are conspicuous in their absence. The latent cruelty of that tournament is responsible for nearly all of the franchise’s most indelible moments: That feeling of lambs going to slaughter is both exhilarating and tragic, and shorn of this, the new film has no real hook. PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Indoor Twin, Movies on TV, Sherwood.

The Imitation Game

C As geniuses often are, British mathematician Alan Turing was an odd duck. And, as Oscar-season biopics often are, The Imitation Game is a resolutely traditional film. Full of childhood flashbacks, handsome sets, sharp zingers and a careful dash of devastation, it takes a prickly prodigy—Turing pioneered the field of computer science and helped crack Nazi codes— and places him in an eminently (and sometimes overly) palatable picture.

But the story packs natural dramatic wallop, and Norwegian director Morten Tyldum tells it with the brisk pacing of a thriller. During World War II, Germany put military transmissions through a complex encoding machine called Enigma. To break it, the British government gathered the country’s best cryptological minds at a country estate near London, a kind of proto-Silicon Valley. It’s here that most of the film unfolds, with the 27-yearold Turing (Benedict Cumberbatch) talking himself onto the team by coolly bragging about his crossword skills—and then exasperating everyone with his egotism and social awkwardness. Today, we’d probably place him somewhere on the autism spectrum. Cumberbatch, the screen’s preeminent player of brilliant weirdos, is

detached but pained—it’s a wonderful performance. We also get scenes set after the war, when Turing was interrogated for homosexuality, an illegal activity at the time. Tyldum, though, presents Turing as a gay martyr but never as a gay man, an elision more frustrating than the film’s many historical tweaks. And yet there’s something to be said for a drama as sturdy and watchable as The Imitation Game. With a story this compelling and a cast this good, it’s difficult not to play along.

PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cedar Hills, Clackamas.

Interstellar

C+ Christopher Nolan is Hollywood’s

most masterful huckster: a blockbuster auteur who uses incredible sleight of hand to elevate into art what other directors would leave as garbage. So it makes perfect sense that Nolan takes us to another galaxy with Interstellar.

In space, nobody can hear you scream, “Wait, that doesn’t make sense...but holy shit, did you see that?!” The plot finds former pilot Cooper (Matthew McConaughey) raising his kids and crops on a blighted Earth. He’s enlisted to captain a space expedition, with the goal of preventing the extinction of mankind. At nearly three hours, Interstellar could easily chop an hour off its runtime and remain an exhilarating piece of escapism. Instead, Nolan overcomplicates things with indecipherable equations and endless exposition. Add a twist ending that’s ludicrous and self-important to the point of hilarity and you’ve got a lot of strained goodwill. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Movies on TV, Sherwood.

Iran after filming a riot in the wake of President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s spurious re-election in 2009. It’s been adapted to film by The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart, who brings the same jaunty momentum, schoolboy wit and self-congratulatory sincerity that make his comedy news program popular. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst Theater.

The Skeleton Twins

C Some twins can finish each other’s sentences, or guess what number the other is imagining with to-the-decimalpoint accuracy. In The Skeleton Twins, Maggie and Milo’s sibling ESP manifests in simultaneous suicide attempts.

Despite living on different coasts and having had no contact in 10 years, the twins, played by Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader, try to take their own lives at practically the same moment. Neither succeeds, but the incident brings

them back under the same roof, in the town in upstate New York where they grew up. If this sounds like typical Sundance-baiting indie stuff, well, it is.

But if there’s one thing writer-director Craig Johnson gets right, it’s the casting. As former Saturday Night Live castmates, Hader and Wiig come with built-in brother-sister chemistry. One can only imagine how insufferable it would be with anyone else.

R. MATTHEW SINGER. Laurelhurst Theater, Academy Theater.

St. Vincent

B- Bill Murray takes what could have been a geriatric riff on About a Boy and turns it into a showcase of his ever-evolving comedic prowess. PG-13.

AP KRYZA. Academy Theater, Avalon, Laurelhurst Theater, Milwaukie, Mt. Hood, Valley.

CONT. on page 42

REVIEW M AT T VA N DY K E

great deal more fun. PG. REBECCA JACOBSON. Academy Theater, Avalon, Laurelhurst Theater, Milwaukie, Valley.

MOVIES

Into the Woods

B+ Stephen Sondheim’s much-loved

musical has finally made it to the big screen, living somewhere between the stage original, with its shattered happy endings and higher death count, and the more sanitized, shortened version that’s long been making the rounds in school productions. Though timid—it waters down forest sex to an agonized make-out scene in the pines—Disney’s long-shelved adaptation is still a beautiful compromise. And hell, the mash-up of cautionary fairy tales is fun, with the Witch (Meryl Streep) pushing a young couple (James Corden and Emily Blunt) to undo a family curse they inherited. Along the way, the two first manipulate, then aid, the major players from the stories of Cinderella, Little Red Riding Hood, Jack and the Beanstalk, and Rapunzel. And it’s Sondheim! Meaning that, for the most part, this production is scored by show tunes more erratic than earworm.

PG. SAUNDRA SORENSON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

John Wick

A- John Wick treads familiar ground:

A retired hit man (Keanu Reeves) is roped back into the life. But this is the rare film that excels as much for what it puts on display as for what it holds back. It oozes style, yet avoids showy slow-mo and CGI. It’s birthed from cliché, yet populated with unpredictable characters. And it’s bloody terrific. R. AP KRYZA. Avalon, Laurelhurst Theater.

Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Ben Stiller spends more time sprinting through a museum. PG. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

Penguins of Madagascar

The besuited birds are back, trying to prevent an evil octopus from taking over the world. PG. Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Forest, Movies on TV, Sherwood.

Rosewater

B Rosewater is a torture film in which

suffering is beside the point. Gael García Bernal plays unjustly imprisoned Iranian-Canadian journalist Maziar Bahari, and his performance is by turns affecting, subtle and hilarious, if also often glib. Bahari, of course, is the very real Newsweek reporter who was kept for 118 days in solitary confinement in

REBEL FIGHTER: Baltimore native Matthew VanDyke.

POINT AND SHOOT In this age of narcissism, you’d be hardpressed to find a better subject than Matthew VanDyke.

With no filmmaking experience and limited knowledge of the region, the sheltered Baltimore native embarked on a “crash course in manhood” by motorbiking his way across the Middle East and creating a documentary of his travels. This would almost certainly have been a terrible film seen by no one, if not for the fact that VanDyke befriended a Libyan man and joined him as a rebel fighter when the country’s civil war broke out in 2011. VanDyke was promptly captured by Muammar Qaddafi’s forces and spent six months in solitary confinement, but upon his release he returned to combat: to fight and to film what would become Point and Shoot.

Back on the front lines, VanDyke’s extended selfie took a more dramatic (and disturbing) turn, as the self-styled soldier filmed himself shooting machine guns and running from enemy fire. At what would become the climax of his footage, another rebel filmed him as he attempted to snipe a pro-Qaddafi fighter from a window. He missed— and then went outside to record a to-camera about his feelings on what had just happened.

But VanDyke is not actually the director of Point and Shoot. He handed over his footage to professional documentarian Marshall Curry (of Street Fight and If a Tree Falls), and the press notes say he didn’t have creative control over the film. But while Curry employs his filmmaking expertise to thread together VanDyke’s story, and apparently spent “20-something” hours interviewing him, he does little to challenge or illuminate VanDyke’s self-aggrandizing view of his adventures.

There’s something to be said for a director who refrains from editorializing. But because VanDyke has set the narrative, the film ultimately explores little of how the experience has affected him in the long run. Nor does it ask how, if at all, his presence contributed to the revolution. We also learn almost nothing about Libya, VanDyke’s fellow soldiers or the war itself (which, of course, is still ongoing—a fact not mentioned in the film, in which the war seems to end when the American goes home).

All that said, Point and Shoot is still a very compelling documentary—I mean, it’s first-person footage from a guy with no combat experience who has a camera in one hand and a gun in the other. But it’s also one that lacks perspective and depth. RUTH BROWN. An American in Libya, with a gun in one hand and a camera in the other.

B-

SEE IT: Point and Shoot opens Friday at Living Room Theaters.

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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DEC. 31–JAN. 6

The Tale of the Princess Kaguya Unbroken (XD) (PG-13) 10:00AM 1:10PM 4:20PM 7:30PM 10:40PM Night At The Museum: Secret Of The Tomb (PG) 10:25AM 11:50AM 1:05PM 2:35PM 3:45PM 5:15PM 7:55PM 10:35PM Penguins Of Madagascar, The (PG) 10:05AM 12:35PM 3:05PM 5:35PM 8:05PM 10:35PM Into The Woods (PG) 10:30AM 1:30PM 4:30PM 7:30PM 10:30PM Woman In Black 2: Angel Of Death (PG-13) 12:15PM 2:50PM 5:25PM 8:00PM 10:35PM Interstellar (PG-13) 11:05AM 2:50PM 6:30PM 10:15PM Wild (R) 10:55AM 1:45PM 4:35PM 7:25PM 10:15PM Unbroken (PG-13) 11:20AM 2:45PM 6:05PM 9:20PM Theory Of Everything, The (PG-13) 10:45AM 1:40PM 4:45PM 7:35PM 10:30PM Top Five (R) 6:45PM 9:30PM

Hunger Games: The Mockingjay, Part 1 (PG-13) 10:20AM 1:20PM 4:20PM 7:20PM 10:20PM Big Hero 6 (PG) 10:50AM 1:35PM 4:20PM 7:05PM 9:50PM Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D (PG-13) 3:30PM 7:00PM Big Eyes (PG-13) 11:40AM 2:20PM 5:00PM 7:40PM 10:25PM Imitation Game, The (PG-13) 10:35AM 1:25PM 4:15PM 7:10PM 10:05PM Annie (2014) (PG) 10:20AM 1:15PM 4:10PM 7:15PM 10:10PM Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies (PG-13) 12:20PM 3:40PM 7:00PM 10:20PM Horrible Bosses 2 (R) 11:25AM 2:10PM 4:55PM 7:45PM 10:25PM Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies 3D (PG-13) 11:00AM 2:20PM 5:40PM 9:00PM Exodus: Gods and Kings (PG-13) 11:55AM 10:25PM Gambler, The (R) 11:10AM 2:15PM 4:55PM 7:45PM 10:35PM

Theory Of Everything, The (PG-13) 4:00PM 10:25PM

Hunger Games: The Mockingjay, Part 1 (PG-13) 10:55AM 1:50PM 4:45PM 7:40PM 10:35PM Big Eyes (PG-13) 11:25AM 2:00PM 4:35PM 7:10PM 9:45PM Big Hero 6 (PG) 11:10AM 1:50PM 4:30PM 7:15PM 9:55PM Imitation Game, The (PG-13) 11:15AM 2:00PM 4:45PM 7:30PM 10:20PM Annie (2014) (PG) 11:00AM 1:55PM 4:40PM 7:30PM 10:25PM Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies 3D (PG-13) 10:50AM 2:05PM 5:20PM 8:35PM Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies (PG-13) 12:20PM 3:40PM 7:00PM 10:15PM Exodus: Gods and Kings (PG-13) 12:30PM 7:00PM Gambler, The (R) 11:00AM 1:45PM 4:30PM 7:15PM 10:00PM

Interstellar (PG-13) 11:00AM 2:40PM 6:20PM 10:00PM Into The Woods (PG) 10:50AM 1:45PM 4:40PM 7:35PM 10:30PM Woman In Black 2: Angel Of Death (PG-13) 11:30AM 2:15PM 5:00PM 7:45PM 10:25PM Hunger Games: The Mockingjay, Part 1 (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:50PM 7:10PM 10:15PM Unbroken (PG-13) 12:20PM 3:40PM 7:00PM 10:20PM Wild (R) 11:00AM 1:45PM 4:30PM 7:25PM 10:15PM Night At The Museum: Secret Of The Tomb (PG) 11:15AM 12:40PM 1:50PM 3:15PM 4:25PM 6:10PM 7:15PM 8:45PM 9:55PM Theory Of Everything, The (PG-13) 1:40PM 7:30PM

Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:30PM 7:00PM 10:20PM Big Eyes (PG-13) 11:15AM 1:55PM 4:40PM 7:25PM 10:05PM Big Hero 6 (PG) 11:10AM 2:05PM 4:45PM 7:30PM 10:10PM Horrible Bosses 2 (R) 11:00AM 4:35PM 10:25PM Annie (2014) (PG) 11:05AM 2:00PM 4:50PM 7:40PM 10:30PM Gambler, The (R) 10:55AM 1:40PM 4:35PM 7:20PM 10:05PM Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies 3D (PG-13) 11:00AM 2:15PM 5:30PM 8:50PM Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D (PG-13) 11:25AM 6:25PM Exodus: Gods and Kings (PG-13) 3:10PM 10:10PM

Into The Woods (PG) 10:50AM 1:45PM 4:40PM 7:35PM 10:30PM Night At The Museum: Secret Of The Tomb (PG) 11:35AM 2:05PM 4:35PM 7:05PM 9:35PM Woman In Black 2: Angel Of Death (PG-13) 12:15PM 2:45PM 5:15PM 7:45PM 10:15PM Interstellar (PG-13) 10:50AM 2:30PM 6:10PM 9:50PM Unbroken (PG-13) 12:35PM 4:00PM 7:10PM 10:20PM Wild (R) 11:05AM 1:50PM 4:35PM 7:20PM 10:05PM Penguins Of Madagascar, The (PG) 11:45AM 2:10PM 4:40PM 7:05PM 9:30PM

FRIDAY

From Studio Ghibli cofounder Isao Takahata comes a hand-drawn adaptation of a 10th-century Japanese folk tale about a girl who emerges from a stalk of bamboo. PG. Laurelhurst Theater.

The Theory of Everything

B- In The Theory of Everything, Stephen Hawking’s contributions to the fields of physics and cosmology take a backseat to the story of his and Jane Wilde’s courtship, marriage and eventual divorce. Eddie Redmayne and Felicity Jones do a superb job bringing Hawking and Wilde to life, like two shining stars revolving around the same tragic center of gravity. PG-13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas.

Top Five

A- Chris Rock took way too long to play himself in a movie. Or perhaps it’s more accurate to say he took far too long to make a movie that sounds like he does. That’s the immediate thing to leap out about Top Five, the third film the comic has written, directed and starred in but the first to come across as a true Chris Rock joint: The dialogue has the tone, pacing and detonation of his standup. In the opening scene, Rock, playing a comedian and actor named Andre Allen, strolls down a New York street with Rosario Dawson and explains why America will never vote an “outhandicapped” candidate into the White House: “You run for president, you don’t roll for president!” Allen isn’t Rock’s precise analog: The real man has never had a franchise as successful as Hammy, a series of buddy comedies starring Allen as a wisecracking cop…who also happens to be a bear. Like Michael Keaton in Birdman, Allen hopes his turn as a serious auteur, in a film about the Haitian slave rebellion, will shift critical perception. For most of the film, Top Five is a loose, engaging walk-and-talk, something like Before Sunrise meets Seinfeld, energized by interjections of hip-hop brashness.

R. MATTHEW SINGER. Clackamas.

Tracks

C+ Like Wild, Tracks tells the story of a woman going on a monthslong trek across unforgiving terrain in order to find herself. Based on the real-life story of Robyn Davidson— who went on an impromptu, 1,700mile walkabout across Australia in 1977—John Curran’s film is distinguished by the performances of its heroine (Mia Wasikowska), her canine and camel companions, and little else. The animals are at times more expressive than Robyn, who goes far out of her way to isolate herself from the world that insists on following her, in one way or another, on her dangerous journey. PG-13.

MICHAEL NORDINE. Laurelhurst Theater.

Unbroken

B Early directorial efforts from movie stars typically exploit every advantage of the Hollywood filmmaking apparatus, so it should come as no surprise that Angelina Jolie’s second feature, Unbroken, looks terrific. Some would argue that the harrowing story of former Olympian Louis Zamperini’s torturous ordeals— 40-plus days lost at sea and the unending abuse of a Japanese prisoner-of-war camp—needn’t resemble a Tom Ford catalog. But Jolie still proves herself an engaged student of telling anatomical details: the ear damaged beyond repair, the athlete’s coltish calf muscles, and, especially, the piercing iris of a bombardier. The wartime heroics unfurl with understated grandeur while shark-boxing lifeboat scenes manage genuine laughs. But only after we arrive in Tokyo and are introduced to the effete sadism of a POW camp commander does the film come alive.

Too long by half and perhaps fatally cluttered, Jolie nonetheless stirs up a darkly passionate, powerfully

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

strange love story within an otherwise boilerplate docudrama. PG-13.

JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

Wild

A- Wild, the film adaptation of

Portlander Cheryl Strayed’s bestselling memoir about hiking 1,100 miles from scorched California to soggy Oregon, is a rich and affecting piece of filmmaking, independent of any book. For those who’ve been, uh, in the wild, Strayed’s memoir recounts how in 1995, at age 26, Strayed undertook a solo trek on the Pacific Crest Trail, the track that wends itself from Mexico to Canada. Her mother had died of cancer a few years earlier, her mar-

riage had crumbled, and she was self-destructing with the help of heroin and promiscuous sex. Like the book, the film—directed by Jean-Marc Vallée of Dallas Buyers Club—is punctuated by flashbacks.

What keeps us engaged isn’t fear about whether Strayed (played in the film by Reese Witherspoon) will survive, but the alchemy of physical toil and emotional turmoil, and the way past traumas and current challenges illuminate one another.

R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cinema 21, CineMagic, Cornelius, Hollywood Theatre, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sandy, St. Johns Cinemas.

For more Movie listings, visit

REVIEW ED ARAQUEL

MOVIES

HONEY DICKS: Franco and Rogen tell Kim what time it is.

THE INTERVIEW Some people take a strong dislike to Katy Perry. There are a variety of stupid reasons for this, and it’s mostly pointless to argue with anyone who believes such a perspective indicates you’re a wizened iconoclast rejecting useless pink fluff.

There’s some symmetry between Perry and The Interview, the new movie from Pineapple Expressionists Seth Rogen and James Franco. A lot of symmetry, actually. Enough that I don’t think it’s a stretch to call director Evan Goldberg’s use of “Firework” in the movie’s memorable death scene a masterstroke of meta-narrative.

As you’ve heard by now, The Interview follows Franco’s douchebaggy talk-show host, Dave Skylark, and Rogen’s Columbia-educated producer, Aaron Rapaport, into North Korea, where they’ve been assigned to assassinate newish dictator Kim Jongun. After all the studio-hacking and release-pulling, it’s not easy to unfreight the film of the controversy. Critics aren’t trying, deeming it both unfunny and unworthy of the hype, with some even suggesting the hacking catastrophe was a publicity stunt to salvage some of its $40 million production budget, a figure equal to about 0.2 percent of Sony’s value. Which, right, OK. Is The Interview funny? I laughed, hard. To be sure, the jokes are better if you read international news. Grocery stores full of fake fruit and an anus-less leader aren’t absurdity but real pieces of the shared narrative in a nuclear-armed nation with more people than Texas.

Are Rogen and Franco likable? Not as likable as Kim, who becomes the most brutal real-life dictator ever developed into a relatable character before being melted down like wax. Some day— after the razor wire and mines are cleared from the DMZ, and the stories emerge from inside the Hermit Kingdom—it will be difficult to watch Randall Park’s very humane performance.

Are there dick jokes? Well, yes. One does need dick jokes to craft a work of near-universal appeal. Ask Big Willie Shakes.

Like so much of Ms. Perry’s work, The Interview’s best moments are about the universal thirst for validation. That thirst is the main motivator for the characters here—the fact that insecurity breads evil is made plain throughout, up to the moment Kim proves willing to push the red button and destroy the world to demonstrate his own worthiness. The moral, too, is plain: Ignite the light, and let it shine, or you will become something ugly. MARTIN CIZMAR.

A better tiger scene than The Hangover!

A SEE IT: The Interview is rated R. It plays at Hollywood Theatre and Living Room Theaters.

MOVIES

COURTESY OF CRITERION COLLECTION

JAN. 2–8

THE WHOLE WORLD IN HIS HANDS: The Great Dictator plays Jan. 1 at the Clinton Street Theater.

3451 SE Belmont St., 503-238-1617 JOHN WICK Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:30 ST. VINCENT Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 06:20 THE BOOK OF LIFE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:45, 04:30 ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:35 GONE GIRL FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 08:15 THE BOXTROLLS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:05, 05:15 GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 03:00, 07:15

Bagdad Theater

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30, 03:00, 07:00, 10:45

Cinema 21

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-223-4515 WILD Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 03:30, 04:00, 06:15, 07:00, 08:30, 09:25 BIG EYES Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:15, 06:45, 09:00

Clinton Street Theater

2522 SE Clinton St., 503-238-8899 THE AMAZING BUBBLE MAN Sat-Sun 02:00 BURROUGHS Sat-SunMon 07:00 THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Sat 12:00

Laurelhurst Theatre & Pub

2735 E Burnside St., 503-232-5511 MEATBALLS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:45 THE SKELETON TWINS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 09:15 TRACKS FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:30 ROSEWATER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 09:00 GONE GIRL Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:40 ST. VINCENT FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:00 BOYHOOD FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:15 JOHN WICK FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:30 GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY Fri-SatSun 12:45 THE TALE OF THE PRINCESS KAGUYA Fri-Sat-Sun 01:00 THE BOXTROLLS Fri-Sat-Sun 04:00

Mission Theater and Pub

1624 NW Glisan St., 503-249-7474-5 GONE GIRL Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:45 ALIEN Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:00 ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:50

Moreland Theatre

6712 SE Milwaukie Ave., 503-236-5257 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 08:30

Roseway Theatre

7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-282-2898 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES 3D Fri-Sat-Tue-Wed 01:00, 04:30, 08:00 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES SunMon 01:00, 04:30, 08:00

St. Johns Cinemas

8704 N Lombard St., 503-286-1768 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 03:50, 07:00, 10:00 WILD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:00, 06:30, 09:05

CineMagic Theatre

2021 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 WILD Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 04:35, 07:00, 09:25

Century 16 Eastport Plaza

4040 SE 82nd Ave. ANNIE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:05, 02:00, 04:50, 07:40, 10:30 BIG EYES Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 11:15, 01:55, 04:40, 07:25, 10:05 BIG HERO 6 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:10, 02:05, 04:45, 07:30, 10:10 EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:25, 06:25 EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 03:10, 10:10 THE GAMBLER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:55, 01:40, 04:35, 07:20, 10:05 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 02:15, 05:30, 08:50 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:00, 03:30, 07:00,

Kennedy School Theater

5736 NE 33rd Ave., 503-249-7474-4 ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30 FURY Fri-Sat-SunMon 02:30 GONE GIRL Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:15, 07:45

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503-281-4215 WILD Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 06:45, 09:15 THE INTERVIEW FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:30 BIRDMAN OR (THE UNEXPECTED VIRTUE OF IGNORANCE) Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:15 THE BABADOOK Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:45 BLADE RUNNER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Wed 07:00 MUPPET TREASURE ISLAND Sun 02:00 T-FORCE Tue 07:30

NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium 1219 SW Park Ave., 503-221-1156 THE SACRIFICE Fri-SatSun 04:00

Academy Theater

7818 SE Stark St., 503-252-0500 DEAR WHITE PEOPLE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 05:00, 09:30 ST. VINCENT Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 02:45, 07:15 FURY Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 09:00 GONE GIRL Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 01:40, 06:45 THE BOXTROLLS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:40 THE SKELETON TWINS

Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:25, 07:00 DIE HARD 2 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:25, 09:45

Century Clackamas Town Center and XD

12000 SE 82nd Ave. ANNIE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 10:50, 01:40, 04:30, 07:20, 10:10 BIG EYES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:40, 02:20, 05:00, 07:40, 10:25 BIG HERO 6 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:40, 04:25, 07:10, 09:50 EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 03:20, 06:50 EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:45, 10:15 THE GAMBLER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:10, 02:15, 04:55, 07:45, 10:35 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 02:20, 05:40, 09:00 THE HOBBIT: THE BATTLE OF THE FIVE ARMIES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:20, 03:40, 07:00, 10:20 HORRIBLE BOSSES 2 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:25, 02:10, 04:55, 07:45, 10:25 THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY, PART 1 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:20, 04:20, 07:20, 10:20 THE IMITATION GAME Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:50, 01:35, 04:25, 07:15, 10:05 INTERSTELLAR Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:55, 02:40, 06:20, 10:00 INTO THE WOODS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 10:50, 01:45, 04:40, 07:35, 10:30 NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: SECRET OF THE TOMB Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 01:05, 02:35, 03:45, 05:15, 07:55, 10:35 PENGUINS OF MADAGASCAR Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:35, 02:05, 04:35, 07:05, 09:35 THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:50, 01:45, 04:40, 07:35, 10:30 TOP FIVE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:45, 09:30 UNBROKEN Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:20, 02:45, 06:05, 09:20 WILD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 10:55, 01:45, 04:35, 07:25, 10:15 THE WOMAN IN BLACK: ANGEL OF DEATH Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 02:50, 05:25, 08:00, 10:35 UFC 182: JONES VS CORMIER Sat 07:00

MUSIC PG. 27

Avalon Theatre & Wunderland

10:20 HORRIBLE BOSSES 2 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:00, 04:35, 10:25 THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY, PART 1 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:30, 03:50, 07:10, 10:15 INTERSTELLAR Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:00, 02:40, 06:20, 10:00 INTO THE WOODS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 10:50, 01:45, 04:40, 07:35, 10:30 NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: SECRET OF THE TOMB Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:15, 12:40, 01:50, 03:15, 04:25, 06:10, 07:15, 08:45, 09:55 THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:40, 07:30 UNBROKEN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:20, 03:40, 07:00, 10:20 WILD Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:00, 01:45, 04:30, 07:25, 10:15 THE WOMAN IN BLACK: ANGEL OF DEATH Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:30, 02:15, 05:00, 07:45, 10:25

SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TO-DATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, JAN. 2-8, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED

Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

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END ROLL

HAZY HORIZON

BY MA RY R OMA N O

willie@wweek.com

From fine dining to groundbreaking research in labs across the nation, marijuana normalization is affecting every part of American society. And it’s only going to get more interesting in the year to come. Here are a few things to look for on the new year’s hazy horizon.

One-Stop Medical and Recreational Shops Anyone with a medical-marijuana card has longed for company on a particularly mellow Sunday dispensary run, and talked to friends who are at least a bit curious. Well, with weed becoming legal to possess in July, dispensary owners across town are hoping for rules that allow them to sell their products to both types of clientele, as they do in Colorado. Given how expensive and weak the recreational buds in Washington have looked, the rest of us should be crossing our fingers as well.

A Smoke and Pancake Medicated food carts can’t be far from the minds of Northwest marijuana entrepreneurs.

Though all states with legal marijuana forbid onsite consumption, many chefs in Colorado have toyed with the vague legislation. A “bud and breakfast” in Denver offers samples of cannabis strains alongside eggs and bacon in the morning.

Neighbors Go Narc Boring states are getting jealous of the cool kids.

This month showed the first major lawsuit against

marijuana legalization, when the attorneys general of Nebraska and Oklahoma sued Colorado for violating federal law. They complain that the incoming flow of marijuana has burdened their criminal justice system. Idaho is already on the offensive, stretching its arms down Highway 90 for marijuana coming out of Washington.

Rippin’ Bowls, Mappin’ Genomes Hordes of sticky-fingered gardeners declare their paternity for legendary strains, and hundreds more claim they’ve got a hook to “the real deal.” Adam Dunn, a prominent grower in the industry, founded the “O-Genome Project,” in which he’s collected nearly 100 samples to get to the bottom of OG Kush. A local company called Phylos Bioscience is collaborating with other research universities to catch up on understanding marijuana as well as we do other significant plants. Soon, we can all look forward to our roommate’s boyfriend shutting up about finding the original Girl Scout Cookies strain in a gym locker.

Medicinal Developments Amid the recreational buzz, medical progress hasn’t lost momentum. There has been remarkable progress in epilepsy treatment, as some compounds in marijuana work as anti-convulsants. In a study conducted in the past year by St. George’s University of London, the combination of marijuana compounds and radiation drastically shrunk high-grade glioma masses, a deadly form of brain cancer. Wider state legalization would foster a climate for breakthroughs. Unless Nebraska stops us.

For more information on John Callahan’s memorial, see ffojohncallahan.tumblr.com.

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Willamette Week DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

CLASSIFIEDS DIRECTORY 45

WELLNESS

45 MUSICIANS’ MARKET TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

WELLNESS COUNSELING

45

STUFF

45 REAL ESTATE MATT PLAMBECK

45 MOTOR

45 SERVICES

45 BULLETIN BOARD

45 JOBS

46 JONESIN’

47

47

47

& MATCHMAKER

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

SERVICES

REL A X!

INDULGE YOURSELF in an - AWESOME FULL BODY MASSAGE

BUILDING/REMODELING

LAWN SERVICES BERNHARD’S Residential, Commercial and Rentals.

Complete yard care, 20 years.

503-515-9803. Licensed and Insured.

No Job Too Small!

PAINTING/WALLPAPERING COLORFAST PAINTING Interior/Exterior, Wallpaper Removal, Texturing, Power Wash Licensed/Insured #160585 503-312-5049

Charles

503-740-5120

lmt#6250

BELLA RIDGE SERVICES Specializing in Interior/Exterior Painting.

Many years of Experience in Exterior Home Repair Go with a new look or freshen up your walls! No job too small Call Anthony for a Free Estimate 503-9517426 CCB# 181028

TREE SERVICES

STEVE GREENBERG TREE SERVICE Pruning and removals, stump grinding.

24-hour emergency service. Licensed/ Insured. CCB#67024. Free estimates.

503-284-2077

ADULT CARE CLEANING HYPNOSIS

TOTALLY RELAXING MASSAGE Featuring Swedish, deep tissue and sports techniques by a male therapist.

Conveniently located, affordable, and preferring male clientele at this time. #5968 By appointment Tim 503.482.3041

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Elevate Your Self Esteem Bust Thru Old Blocks Stop Procrastinating Get Your Mojo Back!

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MEN’S HEALTH

HOME FURNISHING

BEDTIME

TWINS

MATTRESS

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$

COMPANY

FULL $ 89 (503)

CAREGIVER AVAILABLE 27/7 Honest and trustworthy, will provide care in your home for your loved one. Criminal background check available, please contact Kay 503-449-3077

LANGUAGE

BULLETIN BOARD

ELECTRONICS

Trasformational Hypnotherapy

BACK COVER CONTINUED

PETS

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

MASSAGE (LICENSED)

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DECEMBER 31, 2014

QUEEN

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WILLAMETTE WEEK’S GATHERING PLACE

GARDENING

ADOPTION

PREP YOUR YARD FOR WINTER! Landscape Cleanups, Pruning, Hauling, Mulching, Eave Cleaning, Maintenance, Design Ideas Free Estimates - Friendly Service Call John 503-274-7939 NW.Plantscapes@yahoo.com

NON-PROFIT DISCOUNTS AVAILABLE.

PREGNANT? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-413-6293.

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HAULING/MOVING LJ’S HAULING ANYTHING Removal of Metal/Cars free 503-839-7222

WWEEK.COM

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MANSCAPING Bodyhair grooming M4M. Discrete quality service.

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WE’VE GOT THE JOB FOR YOU WWEEK.COM

is now accepting registrations for its next conference, July 13 - 17, 2015. The course is held in the exquisite town of Oceanside, Oregon. There will be five experienced authors (YA, MG, nonfiction, picture book, poetry), two children’s book editors (from major NY houses), and one children’s book agent. A number of our students have been published. We’d like you to be the next.

Please go to www.occbww.com for much more information. Or contact us at authilus@teleport.com

HEALTH STRUGGLING WITH DRUGS OR ALCHOHOL? Addicted to PILLS? Talk to someone who cares. Call The Addiction Hope & Help Line for a free assessment.

800-978-6674

LESSONS CLASSICAL PIANO/ KEYBOARD THEORY. PERFORMANCE. ALL AGES. PARTY ENTERTAINMENT PORTLAND 503-227-6557

LOST & FOUND FOUND TABLET COMPUTER I would like to report finding a surface tablet computer on the Willamete waterfront on the 6th of October.

Please contact me if you have any further questions or if you may know who this belongs to.

MISCELLANEOUS

MUSICIANS MARKET FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to portland.backpage.com and submit ads online.

Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

INSTRUMENTS FOR SALE TRADEUPMUSIC.COM Buying, selling, instruments of every shape and size. Open 11am-7pm every day. 4701 SE Division & 1834 NE Alberta.

MUSIC LESSONS LEARN PIANO ALL STYLES, LEVELS With 2 time Grammy winner Peter Boe. 503-274-8727.

REAL ESTATE

AUTO INSURANCE STARTING AT $25/ MONTH! Call 855-977-9537

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OR JUST POLY-CURIOUS POLYAMORY CIRCLE CALL LAURY 503-285-4848

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GENERAL PLACE MOBILE BILLBOARD ON YOUR VEHICLE, EARN $250 WEEKLY. We place Ad using vinyl graphic sheet on your vehicle for free and you earn $250 weekly when you drive your vehicle to your normal routine places. No Mileage required! Applicant must possess valid DL and pass background check. Contact: conceptcarwrap@gmail.com via email or text (267) 888-5244 to apply.

CALL TO LIST YOUR PROPRTY 503-445-2757

ROOMMATE SERVICES ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Roommates.com.

Willamette Week Classifieds DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

45

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

CHATLINES

Find your Flame on

JONESIN’

by Matt Jones

Editor’s Note–this is how you do it. all arteries 69 Patron saint of sailors 70 Mat activity 71 Help a student 72 Seacrest of “Seacrest out” 73 Be the author of

LiveMatch

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Seattle 206-753-CHAT • Tacoma 253-359-CHAT • Everett 425-405-CHAT

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MAN to MAN

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Across 1 Purring Persian 4 Opposite of “ja” 8 Arthur Miller’s domain 13 Leon of “The Haj” 15 Too 16 Alex or Nikki 17 Gas station feature 18 Jury member 19 Hirsch of “Into the Wild” 20 START OF A QUIP 23 Bobby who

46 Sounds from tiny dogs 48 Blog feed letters 49 PART THREE OF QUIP 53 Vietnamese new year 54 Period 55 Doesn’t eat 59 END OF QUIP 63 White, in Geneva 66 One of the bases 67 Taboo act 68 The mother of

sang “Mack the Knife” 24 Give guns to 25 Performed 28 SPEAKER OF QUIP 33 Relaxed sounds 36 “Yeah, right!”

37 Never before seen 38 Show people the way 40 PART TWO OF QUIP 43 Ms. Lovato 44 Randy Travis song “Faith ___”

Down 1 He’s got a bow and arrow 2 Dutch-speaking resort island 3 Game show feature 4 Back of the neck 5 Mt. number 6 “Gotcha!”

7 Mailer of “Harlot’s Ghost” 8 Novelist ___ Alexie 9 Get under control 10 ___ Baba 11 Hair goop 12 One of a pair 14 Bowling headache 21 Cross letters 22 Tolkien creature 25 White Cliffs city 26 Agenda components 27 Sandwich shops 29 Where: Lat. 30 Dudes 31 Atticus Finch and colleagues, for short

32 Pea place 33 Top invitees 34 Therefore 35 Darer’s phrase 39 Two, in Tegucigalpa 41 Bestseller 42 Bk. of the Bible 45 Lot gamble 47 It might get cracked 50 Gold, to Garcia Marquez 51 Preferably 52 Mary Poppins, e.g.

56 Reporter’s win 57 Color slightly 58 General Motors great Alfred 59 Enthusiastic about 60 Sacred 61 Classic book of 1815 62 Peasant 63 Spooky flyer 64 ESPN analyst Holtz 65 Bookstore section

last week’s answers

©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #JONZ708.

Talk About A Good Time

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ENTERTAINMENT

REAL PEOPLE REAL DESIRE REAL FUN

Magic Garden 1969-2014

Magic Garden, born in 1968 as a lesbian club, raised on stiff drinks and sexy good times to become Portland's Indie Rock Strip Club, will cease existence on New Year's Day 2015.

It will be remembered as a loving enclave of dimly lit good times, beautiful, natural dancers and good cheap food.

Magic Garden is survived by thousands of people who've staggered out with a smile on their faces.

503-416-7436 More local numbers: 1-800-550-0618 Ahora en Español/18+ www.interactivemale.com

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wweekdotcom

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www.livelinks.com 46

Willamette Week Classifieds DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

wweekdotcom

Ahora en Español

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wweekdotcom

TO PLACE AN AD CONTACT:

MATT PLAMBECK

503-445-2757 • mplambeck@wweek.com

BACK COVER CONTINUED...

© 2015 Rob Brezsny

Week of January 1

TO PLACE AN AD ON BACK COVER CONTINUED call 503-445-2757

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Most salamanders reproduce by laying eggs, but the alpine salamander doesn’t.

Females of that species give birth to live young after long pregnancies that may last three years. What does this have to do with you? Well, I expect you to experience a metaphorical pregnancy in the coming months.

Even if you’re male, you will be gestating a project or creation or inspiration. And it’s important that you don’t let your the incubation period drag on and on and on, as the alpine salamanders do. I suggest you give birth no later than July.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Maybe you have had a dream like this: You’re wandering around a house you live in, and at the end of a long hallway you come to a door you’ve never seen before. How could you have missed it in the past? It must have been there the whole time. You turn the knob, open the door, and slip inside.

Amazing! The room is full of interesting things that excite your imagination. What’s more, on the opposite wall there’s another door that leads to further rooms.

In fact, you realize there’s an additional section of the house you have never known about or explored. Whether or not you have had a dream like that, Taurus, I’m betting that in 2015, you will experience a symbolically similar series of events in your waking life.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The Greek god Zeus had seven wives. Themis, Leto, Eurynome, and Hera were among them. Another was his older sister Demeter, and a sixth was his aunt Mnemosyne. Then there was the sea nymph Metis. Unfortunately, he ate Metis -- literally devoured her -- which effectively ended their marriage. In 2015, Gemini, I encourage you to avoid Zeus’s jumbled, complicated approach to love and intimacy.

Favor quality over quantity. Deepen your focus rather than expanding your options. Most importantly, make sure your romantic adventures never lead to you feeling fragmented or divided against yourself. This is the year you learn more than ever before about what it’s like for all the different parts of you to be united.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Here are three of my top wishes for you in 2105: You will have a clear, precise sense of what’s yours and what’s not yours . . . of what’s possible to accomplish and what’s impossible . . . of what will be a good influence on you and what won’t be. To help ensure that these wishes come true, refer regularly to the following advice from Cancerian author Elizabeth Gilbert: “You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. That’s a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind.

That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.”

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Author Robert Moss has published 27 books. When he talks about the art of launching and completing big projects, I listen attentively.

There’s one piece of advice he offers that would be particularly helpful for you to keep in mind throughout the first half of 2015. “If we wait until we are fully prepared in order to do something, we may never get it done,” he says. “It’s important to do things before we think we are ready.” Can you handle that, Leo? Are you willing to give up your fantasies about being perfectly qualified and perfectly trained and perfectly primed before you dive in?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The fish known as the coelacanths were thought to have become extinct 66 million years ago. That was when they disappeared from the fossil record. But in 1938 a fisherman in South Africa caught a live coelacanth. Eventually, whole colonies were discovered in the Indian Ocean off the east coast of Africa and near Indonesia. I foresee a comparable phenomenon happening in your life during the coming months, Virgo. An influence you believed to have disappeared from your life will resurface. Should you welcome and embrace it? Here’s what I think: Only if you’re interested in its potential role in your future, not because of a nostalgic attachment.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “Nothing brings people closer than business,” said composer Arnold Schoenberg. You could be living proof of that hypothesis in

2015, Libra. Your drive to engage in profitable activities will be at a peak, and so will your knack for making good decisions about profitable activities. If you cash in on these potentials, your social life will flourish. Your web of connections will expand and deepen. You will generate high levels of camaraderie by collaborating with allies on productive projects.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Deathwatch beetles have a peculiar approach to the mating game. Their seduction technique consists of smacking their heads against a hard object over and over again. This generates a tapping sound that is apparently sexy to potential partners. I discourage you from similar behaviors as you seek the kind of love you want in 2015. The first rule of romantic engagement is this: Sacrificing or diminishing yourself may seem to work in the short run, but it can’t possibly lead to lasting good. If you want to stir up the best results, treat yourself with tenderness and respect.

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SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Dieterich Buxtehude (1637-1707) was a German composer whose organ music is still played today. He was a major influence on a far more famous German composer, Johann Sebastian Bach (1685-1750). When Bach was a young man, he decided it was crucial for him to experience Buxtehude’s music first-hand. He took a leave of absence from his job and walked over 250 miles to the town where Buxtehude lived. There he received the guidance and inspiration he sought. In 2015, Sagittarius, I’d love to see you summon Bach’s determination as you go in quest of the teaching you want and need.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Even in normal times, you are a fount of regeneration. Your ever-growing hair and fingernails are visible signs of your nonstop renewal. A lot of other action happens without your conscious awareness. For example, your tastebuds replace themselves every two weeks. You produce 200 billion red blood cells and 10 billion white blood cells every day.

Every month the epidermis of your skin is completely replaced, and every 12 months your lungs are composed of a fresh set of cells. In 2015, you will continue to revitalize yourself in all these ways, but will also undergo a comparable regeneration of your mind and soul. Here’s my prediction: This will be a year of renaissance, rejuvenation, and reinvention.

PETS FOR SALE

Have a safe & happy new year!

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Sometimes I can feel my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living,” says a character in Jonathan Safran Foer’s novel Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. If you have ever felt that way, Aquarius, I predict that you will get some relief in 2015. Your bones won’t be straining as much as they have in the past because you will be living at least one of the lives you have wanted to live but haven’t been able to before. How you will handle all the new lightness that will be available?

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Erotomania” is a word for the erroneous fantasies people entertain when they imagine that a celebrity is in love with them. Laughable, right? Just because I have dreams of Game of Thrones actress Lena Headey texting me seductive notes doesn’t mean that she genuinely yearns for my companionship. And yet most of us, including you and me, harbor almost equally outlandish beliefs and misapprehensions about all kinds of things. They may not be as far-fetched as those that arise from erotomania, but they are still out of sync with reality. The good news, Pisces, is that in 2015 you will have the best chance ever to become aware of and shed your delusions -- even the long-running, deeply-rooted kinds.

CHIHUAHUAS Puppies!, Call for pricing. Financing Avail. Adult Adoptions Also. Reputable Oregon Kennel. Unique Colors, Long & Short Haired, Tiny to Hearty sizes. Health Guaranteed, UTD, Vaccinations/Wormings, Litterbox Trained, Socialized. Video/ Pictures/Virtual Tour: www.chi-pup.net References Happily Supplied! Easy I-5 Access. Drain, OR. Umpqua Valley Kennels, Vic & Mary Kasser 541-459-5951

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MILES

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Homework Send me a list of your top five New Year’s resolutions. I’m at Truthrooster@gmail.com.

FLORENCE check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

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Willamette Week Classifieds DECEMBER 31, 2014 wweek.com

47

DEC. 31, 2014

Cover Oregon is over You may still be eligible for a premium tax credit or even a $0 or low-cost health plan.

TO ADVERTISE ON WILLAMETTE WEEK’S BACK COVER CALL 445-2757

Don’t waste hours navigating the

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Massage openings in the Mt. Tabor area. Call Jerry for info. 503-757-7295.

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Muay Thai

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Jan. 3rd & 4th Portland Expo Center Sat. 9-6, Sun 9-4. Admission $10. 503-363-9564 wesknodelgunshows.com

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Nonprofit Attorneys Bankruptcy

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W W E E K D OT C O M

CASH for INSTRUMENTS Tradeupmusic.com SE - 503-236-8800 NE - 503-335-8800

JEFF BECK, MICHAEL JACKSON

guitarist Jennifer Batten offering January guitar lessons. Contact battenposse@earthlink.net

program with suboxone.

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Willamette Week’s

4th Annual

Nonprofits, Here’s your best chance to find great volunteers for the new year ahead!

On January 14 and 21, Willamette Week will be publishing — in print and online — our fourth annual Volunteer Guide.

It works! Hurry: The deadline is Monday 1/5 at 4pm.

Contact Matt Plambeck at WW to learn more.

Call 503-445-2757 or go to wweek.com/volunteerguide

W W E E K D OT C O M

MEDICAL MARIJUANA Card Services Clinic

503-384-WEED (9333) www.mmcsclinic.com 4911 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland Mon-Sat 9-6

503 235 1035

New Downtown Location!

1501 SW Broadway www.mellowmood.com

4119 SE Hawthorne, Portland ph: 503-235-PIPE (7473)

Pizza Delivery

Until 4AM!

www.hammyspizza.com