Number Two, Issue Five

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NUMBER TWO, ISSUE FIVE FOUR / SIX / TWENTY TEN TWELVE YEAR SIX WK12.COM


Procrastination. Let’s break that down. “Pro” as in I’m a professional, and “crass”, as in I’m insensitive to others involved in the “nation”. I’m a professional crass to the nation. Ok ok, that’s my interpretation of the word. The real origin comes from the Latin words pro- (forward) and crastinus (of tomorrow). Anyway you look at it you can’t escape the evil it brings: Stress, loss of sleep, and office chair calisthenics are all by-products of procrastination-the oh-so familiar feeling fo being overwhelmed and succuming to it. However, there is another side to the 15-letter word. The brighter side of putting off the most important thing to the bitter end and leaving oneself to get drunk: clean the house, complete other tasks that have been set aside, call long lost friends, catch up on TV, and, yes, start new projects, all without overthinking the copmlexity of the task at hand. Well with all that being said, a week late and a dollar short, we finish Number Two, Issue Five in the style of Procrastination.



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*bonus: if you can locate the hole shown in this picture, you will win a handsome prize!

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To Do:

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Done.

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Repeat this step six times. After the sixth time, immediately draw a duck on the sheet of paper and set aside. Look at the three babies of the other one. They don’t look as perfect anymore, do they? Throw them in the garbage. Find the duck. Cross out the duck and draw a snake. Draw a fire on the snake. Not a very realistic fire (i.e. NO SMOKE). Draw a smiley face on the duck. Think about what that means. Give the snake a thought bubble. Fill in the thought bubble. Don’t think too hard about what the snake is thinking because you have work to do.

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Busy?

Find a piece of paper. Cut it in half. Or tear it in half. Fold both of your halves in half. One across the length, which will now be called “the long one.” The other across the width, which will now be called “the other one.” Open the long one and set aside. Tear the other one into three equal sized pieces. Don’t cut. Tear. These should be as equal as possible. Set aside. Crumple up the long one, smooth it out, fold it, and open it again.

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i’m not ready yet

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Later means never.

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Never it is.

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Race Unready. I don’t want to admit that I’m a procrastinator. In fact, I would rather not even bring up the word just in case someone was thinking it. I would rather have people think of me as a busy man, and that I will get to the task in order of importance. Yes, it’s true that I have a lot of things going at once, and on occasion leave one out or set one aside for later. In all fairness I do try to maintain my batting average, keeping the completed projects out weighing the incomplete projects.

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With the new addition of WK12 in my life, I have had to essentially procrastinate on less important, or should I say, less pressing things. One such thing is motorcycle racing. I know the logical thing to do is put it at bay seeing as it’s expensive and time consuming. Welp, I just don’t work that way. Instead I have sold motorcycles, worked over-over-time, skipped out on dates with my GF, and done last minute prep in order to race. Almost every race weekend I wait until the night before my race to do any mandatory race prep work. The law of averages has given me a few wins, but I have had more disappointment than in previous years: One obliterated motor Three failed races where I have broken down mid-race Bad crashes Countless hours lost on sleep Unhappy girlfriend No money

But I still get to race!

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