Number Two, Issue Four

Page 1

SYRACUSE 1 VERMONT 16 GONZAGA 8 FLORIDA ST. 9

BUTLER 5 UTEP 12

VANDERBILT 4 MURRAY ST. 13 SYRACUSE 1 VERMONT 16 GONZAGA 8 FLORIDA ST. 9

BUTLER 5 UTEP 12

VANDERBILT 4 MURRAY ST. 13


No. 2

Issue 4

W+K 12 12.6 3/16

2010 LUCKY


We might not be the luckiest bunch, but we’ve had our share of luck all the same. We’ll know in a few months. Italians, we recently found out, ward off a jinx by touching iron. And if iron isn’t within arm’s reach, they touch their balls. Women touch their breasts. This is their tradition. Coming from the Greeks in the fourth century, horseshoes are said to be the most universal of luck items. A shoe from a horse is lucky? Was he so lucky to have it nailed to his foot? How the hell did rabbits’ feel these become so lucky? What is our obsession with taking things off animals and calling them lucky? The rabbit wasn’t so lucky to have his foot sawed off. Why are black cats unlucky? What makes the color of a pet unlucky? And pink elephants are lucky? What if a black cat and pink elephant mated? Or a lucky rabbit and a black cat. What would you get then? An even-Steven offspring. St. Patrick’s Day is here and so is March Madness. It’s time to get lucky.


TIMETABLE OF CONTENTS Luck Off Egg Pan, Noodle Pot, Slots of Fun Fifty Million to One Trust Tom A Saab Story 1 in 100 Wins Luck Happens Luck v. Skill Free Throws Poker It Should Have Been Pudding Crash Course Lucky Chain


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50 million to 1

YOU WIN

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YOU MIGHT BE A WINNER! 15


BUT YOU’RE NOT.


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Jim Riswold liking your idea 40% Skill 60% Luck

Wining a stuffed animal in skill crane 65% Skill 35% Luck

Predicting anything on LOST 80% Skill 20% Luck

A fairly skilled ball player making 50 free throws in a row 90% Skill 10% Luck

Avatar winning Oscar for special effects 95% Skill 5% Luck

Manu dating Megan Fox 100% Skill*


*Manu dating Megan Fox would also require 100% luck.

The country you’re born into 100% Luck

Lottery .01% Skill 99.99% Luck

New Zealand winning 2010 World Cup 10% Skill 90% Luck

Success of the Snuggie 15% Skill 85% Luck

Finding a good parking spot 25% Skill 75% Luck

Getting laid after buying a girl a drink 30% Skill 70% Luck


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AN IVY LEAGUE EDUCATION

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A few years ago, my (now ex) boyfriend was accepted to Brown University’s Masters program for Computer Science. He was living in San Francisco at the time, and had absolutely no way to pay for school. Shortly after deciding he would have to turn down his acceptance, a door from a parked car was opened into him as he was flying down a steep hill on his bicycle. His bike was totaled and his face was split open. For about a week he looked like the Elephant Man, but the only permanent damage is a tiny scar on his upper lip. The man who opened his car door at that fateful second happened to be well insured, and my (now ex) boyfriend received a settlement for the exact amount of money it costs to get a Masters degree in Computer Science from Brown University. He still obsesses about the scar.


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This zine has been sent to you for good luck! It has been sent around the world 9 times, the original is in the Amsterdam office of Wieden+Kennedy. It was started when a senior copywriter was microwaving his pad thai and the container exploded on his face. His eyesight was saved because of this letter. The luck has now been sent to you! A junior planner in London broke the chain 5 years ago, and now she is still a junior planner. You will receive good luck within 12 days of receiving this message if you make 12 copies of this zine and place them in 12 bathrooms within 12 hours. You will become as famous and successful as Dan Wieden himself. You will become witty and popular at parties. People will respect your taste. Joe Staples will retweet you. A young team in Tokyo once sent this message out and they immediately won a Cannes Titanium Lion for a 30 second radio spot. An account exec in New York made copies for every bathroom on her floor. The next day she found $40 million extra in a budget for a campaign she was managing. Place 12 copies of this zine in 12 bathrooms within 12 hours or all the work you do for the next 12 months will be killed.

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Do not do the following: Constantine Dias received this chain in 1998. He asked his intern to make 12 copies and send them out. A few days later, the intern won a new business pitch and replaced Dias as Creative Director. You may laugh and say this is superstition, but many people have already sent this letter. And in an agency where clowns walk on their hands and severed arms are manufactured for video games, clearly weirder things have happened. Good luck but please remember: 12 copies of this message must leave your hand. Do not delay! Make 12 copies right now. There’s a copier right down the hall from this bathroom. The next time you hear a knock while using a restroom, it could be a person with a small bladder, or it could be Fate. Do not ignore this letter! Do not break the chain!

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