Be Prepared to Effectively Manage Confl ict

COURTESY OF GROW

Perhaps it’s sitting in a meeting and your coworker Holly interrupts you (for what seems like the 10th time this week). Or maybe you and Pam from accounting went after the same promotion; you got it and things just haven’t been quite right between the two of you since. Whether it’s over small things or big things, con ict in the workplace is something almost everyone experiences at some point.

What may seem like a minor thing to you may not be minor to someone else. You may have heard, “it’s business, don’t take it personally.” However, employees take things personally about 70% of the time according to Stanford University.  e impact of con ict in the workplace on lost productivity and retaining good employees is not minor.

• A Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) survey found that 72 percent of employees rank “respectful treatment of all employees at all levels” as the top factor in job satisfaction.

• According to Joseph Grenny of training and development company VitalSmarts, each unaddressed con ict wastes about eight hours of company time in gossip and other unproductive activities.

In addition to our research, we spoke with workplace con ict expert Jessi Zielinski Veldhouse, Vice President of Organizational Development and Training at Encompass LLC to get her take. Right from the start, she con rmed the importance of proper management of con ict at work, stating it’s usually “among the top three problems” in the workplace. So how does an employee or business owner manage con ict?  e best way to start addressing con ict is to arm yourself with information about it.

Con ict Does Not Necessarily Equal Negative First, it’s important to realize that con ict itself is not a bad thing. Some con ict is even necessary as employees debate ideas on how to improve the business. According to Veldhouse, “Con ict is natural, it will happen. But it should always be managed.” While it’s human nature to avoid con ict, well-managed con ict is actually a sign of a healthy company culture.

Understand Where Others Are Coming From Second, it’s important to understand the roots of the con ict. According to Veldhouse, “con ict is about di erence.” SHRM describes several areas where people can di er:

• Priorities – You may disagree with where your project, department or company is going, what it chooses to focus on and how those choices a ect you.

• Perspectives – Age, gender, ethnicity or personality type may give you a very di erent view of an issue compared to your colleagues. Veldhouse notes that “most con ict is driven by personality di erences.”

• Assumptions – A big driver of con ict is making di erent assumptions, particularly about the intent of another person.

After you’ve armed yourself with information about con ict, disagreements or struggles (whatever you want to call them), you can start behaving di erently, regardless of your pay grade.

Resolve Con ict On Your Own According to Blink, an online resource for faculty and sta at the University of California San Diego, employees can take several actions to manage con ict themselves. Among the most important:

• Talk with the other person - Arrange a time and place that will allow you to focus and not be interrupted.

• Focus on behavior and facts, not personalities – Be speci c and focus on what happened.

ensure you understand.

Assume Good Intentions An important addition from Veldhouse is to assume good intent. She notes, “People don’t wake up in the morning thinking ‘How can I be problematic today’?” Most of us want to get along with our co-workers. Communicating directly with the other person is the key and should take the form of a question, not an accusation. Ask the other person what they meant or why they did something that you didn’t like. Without asking, it’s human nature to  ll in the blank with the other person’s intentions, which may be completely wrong. Veldhouse continues, “One approach puts people on the defensive, the other starts a conversation.”

From the business owner’s point of view, it’s critical to encourage people to manage their own con icts.  is is especially true in a small business that may not have a lot of resources. Managing con ict themselves helps workers feel ownership of the solution rather than having a solution imposed on them. One of Veldhouse’s “golden rules” is to have leaders ask upfront, “Have you talked with the other person?” If they haven’t, they should be advised to take that  rst step. Using this approach, leaders empower employees to manage con ict, which in turn helps foster a healthy con ict culture in a virtuous cycle.

Part of managing con ict e ectively is overcoming our fear of it. While it’s natural to not want con ict, it’s a smarter choice in business to recognize it and use it to your advantage.  e worst option is to avoid it. As Grenny from VitalSmarts observes, “If you don’t talk it out, you act it out.”

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