WORKLIFE Magazine - April 2019

May2019 2019 April

Win-Win Who’s in Charge?

4 Proven Keystones to Take Back Power

Micro Agressions

Running Towards Danger for Improved Health

The Dreaded Jetlag

Tips to get back to Normal FAST

Leadership lessons from the Paralympics

Lovely People

A Parkinson’s Insider’s take on the Kindness of Strangers

Cameron Daddo What you didn’t know about this much loved personality

FROM FROM THE CEO

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The Workplace Mental Health Institute has had a busy month this month.

We’ve been delivering masterclasses in London, New York, Chicago and in Australia. We are so pleased to see that our cousins in Europe and the US are also paying attention to mental health, wellbeing and resilience in the workplace. And it just highlights to us that mental health is something that affects us all, and these types of masterclasses help managers and leaders everywhere care for their workforces and maximize their ROI. Life is all about contrast and commonality though. In Europe, Spring is in full bloom and we are getting closer to Summer. In the Southern Hemisphere, we are in Autumn and we truly can say ‘Winter is coming’. A friend of mine that’s into mystical esoteric thinking is saying that April is a time of transitioning. I’m not sure about that. After all, aren’t we all transitioning all the time? Yet, April is a special time of the year. One full of hope of things to come. And for some, time to reflect on what has been accomplished and to prepare for winter.

What’s been happening in your world? What’s new?

The April issue of WorkLife has something for everyone. There’s a feature article on Cameron Daddo, an actor and tv personality involved in some important humanitarian efforts. Emi Golding, our Director of Psychology, had the pleasure of interviewing him recently. Of course, Cameron has done many things in his life and career, and we wanted to get his views on mental health too. I’m sure you’ll enjoy the article. What else will you find in the April issue?

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We look at the effects of travel and how to beat, or at least tame, the dreaded jetlag. Although I did meet someone last week that asserted never to experience jetlag. Who knows? we might interview this jetlag-less person in the future!

We take a quick look at how the Inner You drives high performance and what are the key inner elements one must respect to drive and sustain high performance.

Leading from behind – what we can learn about coaching and leadership from the world of sports.

And many more…

I’m sure you’ll appreciate the work that has gone into the April magazine. We thank all our contributors.

And now, Enjoy!

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APRIL 2019 WORKLIFE | MAY 2019

Cameron Daddo’s Beach Ball

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Actor, musician and presenter Cameron Daddo is one of the most recognisable faces in Australian showbusiness.

Getting his start as the host of Perfect Match, he went on to win the Silver Logie for most popular actor in a miniseries, before moving to Los Angeles where he has appeared in a range of TV shows and movies including Models Inc, The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles, and The Mentalist, over the last 25 years.

But what many may not know is that having been

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through his own personal challenges, including losing his home in the GFC, Cameron is also a strong advocate for mental health, especially men’s mental health. He recently appeared on the SBS Docuseries “Filthy Rich ad Homeless” where five high profile Australians swap their privilege for 10 days experiencing what it is really like to be homeless.

You can listen to the interview here

Or read the transcript below:

Emi: I was very excited to learn about your work promoting mental health, especially men’s mental health, and was curious to get your thoughts on mental health in the workplace, and what’s so important about making sure that that’s a Our Director of Psychology, forum where people can not Emi Golding sat down with just raise awareness, but Cameron Daddo recently, also have skills to look after to find out more about his themselves and each other? work promoting mental health.

Cameron: I think it comes

down to having the courage to speak up. I think a lot of us suck it and see, and I don’t think that’s very healthy. There’s a great communication tool – I don’t know if it was my idea, but I think it was. I call it the beachball theory.

The beachball theory is that when I’m talking to someone about an issue, let’s call the issue a beachball. Let’s put it there between us – what colours are you looking at?

Emi: Blue and white Cameron: Well I’m looking at red and green.…Now I turn it around, oh now I see blue and white, now I see what you’re talking about.

We have such a need to be right. I’m right and I’ll defend this position. I feel like in a workplace, and I can talk in a filmset or a rehearsal room, everyone is right.

They’re looking at blue and white, he’s looking at green and yellow, I’m looking at pink and brown. But turn it around and we’re all looking at the same thing, But you’re getting an idea of what each person’s perspective is.

When you give up the need to be right, then I think were in a much better place as far as mental health goes and understanding what other people are going through.

Emi: I love it!

Cameron: You can use it. But you have to call it Cameron Daddo’s beach ball. And when you get one I’ll sign it for you. It’ll say ‘my beachball’.

EG: one of the things that comes up about men’s mental health specifically, a comment from staff we get a lot is that “us guys we don’t talk about stuff like that. We’re not comfortable doing that, we’ve never done it before. What’s been your experience of that in Men’s Team?

Cameron: In Men’s Team that’s a given. But they’re right. The guys who say that to you – the fact that they say that I’m not comfortable, that’s a start that’s great. But Aussie men, American men too, for the most part, unless they’re doing therapy and they’re used to that sort of stuff, most are not used to speaking their feelings. We haven’t been encouraged.

There’s an analogy that from birth, the Dad holds the baby, holding little daughter “see world, that’s my daughter”, and he’s got her close to heart. The same men with their son, say “look world, that’s my son” and he’s held away. So from that very young moment,

that is an imprint on us.

So, you know, encouraging men to speak and finding a place of safety, which is what Men’s Team is all about, is having a blueprint, that everyone acknowledges it’s the blueprint. It’s a confidential place, like I said.

There’s no advice, we don’t drink during the meeting, so there’s no alcohol fuelled stuff. And it works really well because everyone checks in with what they’re going through. And if it’s just a number between 1 and 10, “I feel like shit, I’m checking in at a 2” [that’s fine]. And if you want to leave it at that, that’s where you leave it. That doesn’t usually happen, it doesn’t get left there usually.

But I think there are lots of great places out there now for men to go to, and its getting better, but were still pretty crappy at talking and owning our stuff and I want to change that.

Emi: Me too! Thank you Cameron.

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SOARING THROUGH JETLAG

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One of the exciting developments at the Workplace Mental Health Institute this year is the launch of our workshops around the globe! This month, our Resilience at Work and Leader’s Masterclass workshops are being delivered in London, New York and Chicago for one of our valued clients.

Like many WorkLife readers, our Workplace Mental Health Specialists are regular aircommuters, domestically and now internationally as well. We decided to take a closer look at the strategies for managing the dreaded jet-lag so that you (and our Specialists) can make the most of every trip abroad.

Adjust your routine pre-flight Make incremental adjustments to your sleep routine two or three days prior to departure. If flying east, begin to wake an hour or two earlier and go to bed earlier than usual. Do the opposite when flying westward, extending your day by a couple of hours (and sleeping in if possible).

Make a plane plan

Travelling East to West extends the day into night cycle, which is easily adapted to by the human body clock. Travelling towards the East, however, shortens the light before darkness timeframes considerably, working directly against our natural circadian rhythms. Wherever possible, schedule flights in a westward direction (and keep your fingers crossed that those on the window seats don’t pull down the blinds at midday!)

There are several things to keep in mind during your flight to help you reduce jetlag. Hydration is important to maintain healthy digestive function in the absence of sunlight cues. Eat small, regular meals that are easily digestible, and avoid caffeine and alcohol during the flight. Walk around the cabin from time to time – especially during daylight hours at your destination. Plan to sleep during your flight when it is night time at your destination – use an eye mask to block any sunlight or bluespectrum light, and earbuds or noise-cancelling earphones to reduce noise.

A Little Ray of Sunshine

Sleeping aids

The body’s rhythm is influenced by sunlight exposure to the eyes through brain chemicals or neurotransmitters, especially melatonin. Once in the new location it can be tempting to take a ‘nap’ to catch up on sleep lost during an uncomfortable flight. Unless you have arrived at night time in the new location, limit any naps to a short period of between 45 and 90 minutes – then go outside and get as much sun exposure as you can. Failing

This is really more of a caution, than a suggestion.

Melatonin medication has been found to reduce the recovery time for jetlag, but should be discussed with your doctor. The inertia upon waking from sleeping tablets can pose a risk during an emergency. Alcohol used to assist in falling asleep during flights can further worsen jetlag upon arrival.

The use of guided relaxation to facilitate sleep whilst flying has many benefits with none of the risks.

Go West!

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this, blue light entering the eyes through digital screens can be beneficial.

APRIL 2019 WORKLIFE | MAY 2019

MICRO Aggressions

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Three Principles to manage micro aggressions effectively, and improve your Mental Health In the past few years there’s been an uptake of the idea of ‘Micro Aggressions’.

In the mental health and psychology field, micro aggressions are a relatively new concept. While human beings have expressed themselves in a multitude of ways since the beginning of time, in recent years we seem to have become much more focussed on how we describe and define our communication with others. And much more particular as to what kinds of communication are considered acceptable in any given community. (And yes, of course, there are going to be cultural differences as to what is considered appropriate in any given situation).

Amongst professionals, the jury is still out as to where we draw the line – do microaggressions really exist as something to guard against? or are we splitting hairs too finely and limiting our freedom of expression? Regardless, the term is gaining popularity, and a considerable number of people believe in, and are impacted by them, so in this article we look at how we can utilise microaggressions to build our mental health and wellbeing.

But let’s define micro aggressions first. A micro aggression is defined as a brief and commonplace verbal or behavioural action or inaction, intentional or unintentional,

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that is interpreted by a person as personally demeaning, harmful and/or offensive.

And therein lies the challenge – whether a communication is considered to be a microaggression or not, depends upon the interpretation of the receiving party. So, communications that might not be considered problematic at all by some, or would fly under the radar for others, might be experienced as a micro-aggression that is the straw that breaks the camel’s back for someone else, who has a negative impact from it.

While a lot of people are these days focusing on how to avoid micro aggressions, very little has been written on how we can utilise the inevitable micro aggressions that will be flung at us on an almost daily basis, to empower us to build inner strength, resilience and positive mental health. In psychology, one thing we know for sure is that you can’t control other people’s words and actions, but we do have the power to manage our own responses.

So how can we respond when we are on the receiving end of what you might consider to be a micro-aggression?

The Principle of Exposure This principle is borrowed from Exposure Therapy. Exposure Therapy is used to treat phobias. Many people consider phobias as difficult to treat. But they are treatable. From Exposure Therapy we know that in order for people to get rid of a crippling phobia, they need to be exposed to the thing they are afraid of, and they have to experience the fear. There is a particular way that this needs to be done, by professionals only, and it only works when the sufferer is not forced, but decised themselves to ‘lean towards the fear’ as it were. They need to willingly participate in the gradual exposure to the fear. When this happens, Exposure Therapy is very effective.

Likewise, even though micro aggressions by their own definition are nowhere near as crippling or impactful as phobias, we propose that exposing yourself to micro aggressions can help rid you of any negative effects.

A process of desensitisation can occur, as the more you observe micro-aggressions

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occurring, the more you can recognise that it is not personal, it’s not about you the receiver, and that in the overwhelming majority of cases, a microaggression needn’t impact your life in any meaningful way, unless you let it.

You may not want to actively place yourself in a hostile environment, but rest assured, if you participate in life at any level, you are going to find yourself in less than ideal situations where you will be exposed to what you could interpret as microaggressions.

Please note, we are only speaking of micro aggressions not macro aggressions, which would require a more concerted approach.

Furthermore, if you are finding yourself on the receiving end of a lot of this type of communication, it can be very helpful to engage a professional therapist or coach, who can help provide an objective perspective and guide your thinking towards health and empowerment. You don’t need to do it alone.

The Principle of Refusing To Take Offence It’s easy to be offended. There happens to be a plethora of issues and things to be offended at all the time. Just look at social media! But actually, it’s not so hard to have the maturity not to be offended and instead, to be truly compassionate towards others.

Even when they are being ‘silly’, or immature.

Or they just simply don’t see things as we do.

Come to think of it, refusing to take offence easily is not just a mark of maturity and wisdom, but also a sign of humility. Taking offence is usually a process that requires you think of yourself as better than the other person. We don’t usually realise it, but in order to be offended you have to put your own moral code above that of someone else, and be willing and able to judge them.

It’s actually somewhat arrogant to appoint yourself as judge and jury of what you consider to be offensive and what is not.

It’s not very compassionate, is it? But more importantly, it’s not healthy for you. How do

you know that your taking offence is not just a tantrum? Instead of showing wisdom beyond your years, maybe it’s just showing a deep-seated immaturity. That wouldn’t be healthy for anyone and would leave you at risk of experiencing micro aggressions where none had been intended. Or worse, leaving you open for anyone with bad motives to really ‘press your buttons’. Either way, it would leave you exposed and fragile.

But instead, imagine a person who is not easily offended. They don’t take anything personally do they? And they seem more relaxed and happier, don’t they? So, make a conscious decision not to allow yourself to feel offended. It makes for better relationships too. After all, there are other, better ways to deal with things.

The Principle of Personal Power How much personal power do you have?

In Superman movies you see Superman imperviously withstanding a shower of bullets, bombs and missiles. He IS Superman after all! Wouldn’t it be nice to be like Superman? Well, not in a literal sense but

in a psychological sense. Where it doesn’t matter what was going on in the outside world, you are in charge of your internal one.

Where microaggressions slide off you, like water off a duck’s back, as they say.

That’s the point of this principle. Develop the ability, the inner power, needed to withstand, and maybe not even feel, micro aggressions. Wouldn’t that be a great super power to have? Is it realistic?

Absolutely! And it doesn’t mean you tolerate unacceptable behaviour, nor put up a shield to protect you, nor does it mean you try to control your environment and the other people in it. Instead, it’s about building your own confidence that you can handle emotionally whatever slings and arrows (real or perceived, intentional or not) come your way. This allows you to go about your day, your week, your life, fully interacting with the world and those around you, safe in the knowledge that you’ll be OK regardless of what anyone else says or does.

And THAT will do a world of good for your health, your career, and your relationships.

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The Inner You that Drives High Performance and Recovery 10

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‘Be careful out there’. That’s how the sergeant of a famous 70’s cop show used to send his men out into the community.

Today, we also have to be ‘Careful out there’. There’s high competition for few top jobs and we have limited capacity.

So, this happens to be ‘physically’ correct.

But this advice also transfers to our inner space, the space where you get to generate high performance, and we must warn to ‘Be careful in there’.

Dr Michael Gervais, a leading and proven high-performance coach, said “While we

haven’t yet found a golden thread among world-leading performers, there are a set of common traits. One is that they are incredibly aware of their inner experience and have a rich command of their craft. We’ve found that they are aware of their thoughts, their emotions, their sensations and the unfolding environment in a world-class way. They have the ability to course correct when their actions, thoughts, or even words are not aligned with their mission.” This is equally relevant in the workplace, wellbeing and

mental health space.

While we participated in mental health research with the University of Wollongong, we discovered that there are four keystones needed for recovery from mental ill health, which necessitates a shift in performance to occur, which are - Responsibility, Hope, Identity and Meaning. All four keystones drive new performance, regardless of the setting. That’s why these four keystones form the core basis of all our masterclasses.

Responsibility

Hope

The decision to adopt personal responsibility for the results you get in any area of life. Responsibility is about refusing to use excuses that place the blame externally, and thus limit your power, and instead committing to focus on what you can do to create the results you want.

This keystone is about maintaining a positive perspective on what is possible for the future. Hope is comprised of three elements: having something to be hopeful for (setting a goal, a vision or a mission), having some idea of a pathway and actions needed to get there, and personal efficacy (believing in your own capability to complete the steps required).

Identity

Meaning

Creating a powerful story about the self. Creating identity involves an exploration of how we define ourselves, who we would like to be, and how we can enact that in our everyday life.

Considered by some to be the most powerful of all the keystones, meaning is about finding a purpose, a raison d’etre. Meaning is not something to be discovered, but instead, to be created, by ‘following your bliss’ (in the words of Joseph Campbell) or getting into ‘flow state’ (Csikszentmihalyi).

In a future article, we’ll break down each of these keystones and how they apply to making your high performance possible. Stay tuned.

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Lovely People I would never have met if I didn’t have Parkinson’s Disease

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By Joe Golding

The following article is presented in memoriam and in its original form. It first appeared in the Parkinson’s New South Wales Magazine ‘Stand by Me’. It was written by Joseph Golding, recently deceased father of our Director of Psychology, Emi Golding, and the Editors feel it has a beautiful human-interest angle. It also presents a unique insight into the lived experience of someone with a disability.

The relationship between chronic physical disability and mental ill-health is a complex one. Physical health conditions tend to have an impact on the mental and emotional wellbeing of the individual as a direct result of illness itself, the impact of physical health conditions on functioning, side effects of medications, or through other mechanisms which can impact on the quality of life of the individual and their carers. Often, medical professionals’ focus on the physical illness overshadows the mental or emotional concerns. This article highlights the importance of both, for overall wellbeing and improved quality of life.

Two of the worst symptoms of Parkinson’s Disease are falling and freezing. Falling is fairly self explanatory. Freezing is when your body just stops and won’t respond to your mind’s commands. Freezing can leave you stranded in

the middle of the road when the lights change.

One moment you are moving smoothly and the next you are strung out over your walking frame trying to hang on. A freezing episode may last for several phases of the lights, and there is only so much patience in motorists today. Freezing can occur without warning.

However terrible this disease is, it still has one positive aspect. It has taken 21 years of living as a diagnosed Parkinsonian but I have finally found something nice about having it. The big point of enlightenment for me is that I have discovered how helpful people can be. I have met many very nice people who have come to my assistance in the community. There are nice people who want to help me when I am trying to walk in the street and freeze. It is so hard to tell them that there is nothing they can do to help me. Some understand what I am saying but others just seem hurt.

Then there are those who come to help me to stand when I fall. They help to lift my walker from on top of me and after helping me to stand seem reluctant to leave me. There was one occasion in Martin Place, Sydney when I was befriended by a lovely young lady who escorted me the entire length of Martin Plaza and convinced strangers to push me across roads while I sat in my walker, so that I could get across before the traffic lights changed.

I will never forget the very kind man who called a taxi for me while I stood in the rain outside the shops in Brookvale. He knew that no taxi was going to accept me for the short fare I wanted, so he went home and changed his car so that my walker would fit and returned to the shops to collect me and drove me to the accommodation where I was staying. He was a good Samaritan above and beyond the call of good Samaritans. I will never forget him.

There are some lovely people in this world and I am pleased to have met so many of them. You can see in the eyes of some people that they have or had a close person who had Parkinson’s and they want to help you so much that it almost hurts. Others clearly don’t understand the disease but just want to help. There is a whole world of helpful people out there and if I wasn’t an atheist I would say, “God bless them.”

APRIL 2019 WORKLIFE | MAY 2019

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LEADING FROM BEHIND

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By Alison Skate

When the 2016 Summer Paralympics were being staged in Rio, the Men’s 100m T11 class sprint finals were held on one Sunday evening. This is a category for sprint runners with a vision impairment. Only four athletes competed in the final due to the requirement for each vision-impaired runner to have a tethered guide during the race.

The winner, David Brown of the US, finished in a smidgen under 11 seconds with the support of guide, Jerome Avery.

It prompted some thoughts on the similarities between guide runners, and actively coaching one’s team as a leader. Below are three of them. Perhaps you could think of more.

The competitor knows how to run The guide’s role is not to teach the athlete to run, and certainly not to pull them along, but to support them to comply with race conditions and encourage

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them along the way. They don’t hold their hands, they give them some space to move by using a tether between their hands.

The length depends on the terrain, and confidence of the competitor. There is a difference between coaching and training, and the need for each within organisations is often indicated by the level of skill, knowledge and initiative demonstrated by the team member.

The guide is faster than the competitor, but doesn’t finish first It’s important that the guide can run faster than the competitor so that they are not focused on their own performance, but can give their attention to staying in synchronicity with the athlete, and providing brief directions if required to stay on track.

Despite their speed, they do not run ahead of the athlete.

In fact, if the guide crosses the finish line ahead of their blind team mate, they are disqualified.

A good guide, like the coaching leader, moves alongside their team mate and encourages them to surge ahead at the finish line.

The team reaps the rewards Traditionally, only the visionimpaired competitor would stand on the dais and receive a medal. This changed with the 2012 Paralympics in London, which saw both athlete and guide runner receiving recognition for the result.

The guide never crosses the line first, and may not even cross the line second if it is a tight race, but they are each acknowledged as a part of the team that finished in their respective position. Leaders who coach recognise that their job is to support their team to get the job done to the best of everybody’s abilities. Coaching leaders align their focus on results with the group, rather than the individual (we, not me), or to the organisation rather than the department.