1990 v18 i17

Danny Sheehan mocks the pub spots and get another reaction. The audience was the source o f the humor, but still had to pay a cover charge; how does that work out?

One o f his first comments was sim­ ply his reaction to performing in a “ Sixteenth century nightclub” (That is, Gompei's). He then proceeded to play around with the odd resilient proper­ ties o f the stage (what would have happened if someone actually brought a trampoline to the act?) Later on, he noticed a large metal power cable at­ tached to the wall behind the stage and wondered aloud if the wall was “ male.” Considering one night last year when two comedians missed the power cable when the lighting crew

by Robert M andeville

There are a host of comedians who seem to determine their routines before actually stepping onto the stage. This gives the impression that he would still be giving his monologue i f everybody left, which leaves the audience less than satisfied. Then there’s Danny Sheehan.

Many comedians have a good idea o f what gags they w ill use in order to plan their evening, and they look for whatever reactions the crowd gives for his own humor. Danny, armed with only a handful o f canned jokes and “ mini-routines," had the ability to play the audience like a baby grand piano, using actual jokes simply to fill “ dead

attached a condom to iwhis perception was quite remarkable.

Danny played the audience very well (just when you thought it was safe to sit in the front row...). He made good humor with those few in the audience, carefully not alienating those he used.

For example, after seeing a pair of students with headgear, he tried to get “ Mr. Hat” and “ Miss Hat” together.

Some comedians w ill get a good laugh out o f everybody by making fun o f one.

Danny was too much a class act to stoop to those tactics. Realizing the “ liberal” views o f many WPI students, he refused to tell jokes about homo­ sexuals (“ Besides, 1 don’t want to leave a bad taste in your mouth.” W ell,

almost refused.)

Fortune was also in his favor that Friday night. It seemed that every time he conversed with a lady in the audi­ ence, her name was “ Jen.” Either he was extremely lucky or the demo­ graphics in this school are even more skewed than any o f us dreamed.

Though he apparently didn’t actu­ ally need it, he did have some material for the program. Some was the regular, G-rated stuff, including a sight gag about a want ad for a sales clerk who “ must be flexible.” O f course, he de­ scended into the gutter for some o f his humor (“ Isn’ t it amazing that a horse can poop at full gallop? I tried once, and it didn’t work” ).

Danny ended his routine and added a pair o f “ encore” performances: two rounds o f “ The Dating Game,” the second half being one lucky guy and three bachelorettes. Sheehan, acting as Master o f Ceremonies, simply encour­ aged, and the comedy came naturally.

It was interesting to note how men and women answered similar questions.

One male boaster’s reply to a question about his “ measurements” was “ It’s only as wide as a Coke can, but it ’ s long!” When the bachelorettes were asked their measurements, each re­ sponded with their respective heights.

Then Danny made one last com­ ment about how great it was to perform in a gothic basement, and left.

The Student Newspaper of Worcester Polytechnic Institute Volume 18,

N u m

b e r

17

Tuesday, Septem ber 25,1990

WPI Police announce new traffic rules Chief Hanlon, Officer Muhr has over­ all responsibility for developing a comprehensive traffic safety program for the WPI community. “ Over the summer months, John has been working closely with his counterparts in local city, town and campus police agencies with a view

by Jo h n J. H a n lo n D ire cto r o f P ublic Safety

Jack Hanlon, the Director o f Public Safety at the Institute, has appointed Officer John Muhr to the position of Traffic Programs Officer for the WPI Police Department.

According to

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What you’re about to read is real.

O f course my creative imagination w ill lend to get in the way to keep it interest­ ing. It’s about rape. It’ s not about statistics or rules to prevent it form happening. I ’m writing about it from my point o f view because it happened to me. I wasn’ t raped in that I was worried about being pregnant, or hav­ ing some disease. Let’s just say that I have a strong leg. Oh, I know some of you are laughing, thinking it’ ll never happen to you. It happened to me.

I had been going out with this guy for a long time. This was in my sopho­ more year in high school. We weren’t real serious or at least I didn’t think so.

One day during that summer he brought me to his cellar to “ show me

towards developing this program.

John focused on: traffic flow, pedes­ trian safety, parking facility safety and enforcement. As a result of meetings with the City o f Worcester Traffic Engineeers, a number o f pedestrian and traffic flow improvements have been jointly recommended.”

th e

something.” Now when I think back I realize that he locked the door behind us. While we were down there, I had my back to him while I read a maga­ zine. When I turned around, he came towards me with no clothes on. I ran to the stairs, but he caught me and threw me down in a chair and restrained me.

I screamed and cried but he just stared at me with those eyes. I won’ t go into any more details, except that I kicked him and ran up the stairs where his brother let me out. That was the last time I saw him until this summer when he would come into my place of sum­ mer employment and just stare at me with those horrible eyes.

I had blocked it out of my mind after I told my mom, and she said that I made

r e a lity

C hief Hanlon added that a number o f parking regulations for 1990-1991 have changed. (A copy of these new parking regulations can be obtained at the Police Headquarters at 35 Dean Street). According to Chief Hanlon there has been an increase in the amount of fines, approximately $5.00

o f r a p e

up stupid stories after using him and then dumping him. A ll those memo­ ries came back at the beginning o f this school year when some o f the fresh­ men guys teased a girl after misinter­ preting some o f her statements as sex­ ual innuendos. I felt so bad for her I almost cried. Here I am at a school where there is a ratio o f at least six guys to every gi rl. I get so scared when some of these guys get close to me. I am always reminded o f him and those horrible eyes that I see every time I close my eyes. There are some guys here with whom I can trust my life, but then they sometimes get too close and I have to back away. A t the beginning o f the school year, there was a program

on date rape that I didn't go to, afraid o f the memories it would bring back.

Memories I did not want to remember.

But I w ill. I w ill always remember.

One guy here was my friend until I backed away, scared. Every time I looked into his eyes, I saw “ those” eyes and it scared me. I am very sorry for hurting your feelings, but you hurt mine. No, actually the guy in the tenth grade did. I can’t tell you to your face right now, but please give me time.

E d ito r’s Note: The Rape H otline C risis Program on 1016 M ain Street, 799-5700, p ro vid e s c o n fid e n tia l phone counseling and assistance to victims o f rape.

in most cases.

A new appeal procedure is now in place. A hearing may be requested by calling or w riting the WPI Police within 21 days o f the receipt o f a park­ ing violation. Hearings w ill be sched­ uled on the last Thursday o f each month, beginning at 8 am.

The new citation notice also allows the recipient to mail their fine (by check or money order) in the ticket/ envelope provided. “ Our greatest safety concern, of couse, is keeping out service roadways clear for that potential police, fire or medical emergency. I urge all o f our community members to make a con­ scious effort to help us in this area,” says Hanlon.

Officer Muhr has informed us that he is working closely with our Plant Services section to update parking signs in all campus lots and on all campus roadways. Ticketing had been delayed, as the WPI Police were await­ ing the arrival o f the above mentioned new citation notice. These new orange colored parking tickets were received at the Police Headquarters on Friday, September 21, 1990.

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NEWSPEAK PHOTO / PALL CRIVELL1

Page 2

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday September 25,1990

NEWS International News Tension mounted once again in the gulf, and the week ended with a bit o f diplomatic warfare.

It started the week before, when Iraqi troops in Kuwait entered four Western diplomatic com­ pounds (Belgium, France, Canada and Nether­ lands). France was angered by the fact that its embassy had been entered that it sent a 4,000 troop brigade and several aircraft to the Persian gulf region. The UN responded to the incident by condemning Iraq and threatened to impose an air blockade. On a videotaped message played on Iraqi T V , Bush warned that the show­ down with Saddam Hussein might lead to war.

Hussein responded by claiming that Bush wished to be the “ dictator o f the whole world.”

Near the end o f the week, Saddam Hussein asked for a videotaped message from him to be played on the networks. American officials said they would hand the video over to the networks.

On Monday, irf Brussels, European Community members announced that they were going to expel all o f the Iraqi m ilitary personnel and restrict the travel o f foreign diplomats in their country. On Tuesday, in Paris, nine European nations urged the UN to impose an air embargo upon Iraq, and it appears as i f the UN is currently moving closer to such a move. On Wednesday, Iraq announced that it was going to seize the assets o f nations imposing the embargo-the US has a small amount o f assets that could be seized. On Friday, the biggest diplomatic con­ flict took place, when Iraq expelled 18 diplo­ mats including three Americans. The US retali­ ated by expelling three Iraqi diplomats. Finally, the Soviet Union announced that it would estab­ lish formal diplomatic ties with Saudi Arabia.

There was some m ilitary news as well, be­ sides the increase in French troops and threats o f an air blockade. On Monday, Secretary o f Defense Cheney fired General Michael Dugan, the A ir Force chief o f staff for using poor judg­ ment and releasing classified data. Dugan told the public about plans to bomb Baghdad in attempt to k ill Hussein should war break out.

Also, the US said that Iraq now has 360,000 troops in Kuwait and bordering regions in Iraq.

This shows that there has been a steady increase, although the troops are primarily in defensive positions. Bush said that the Iraqi m ilitary must not benefit from any humanitarian aid, and seemed to give a mixed review o f the effective­ ness o f the economic sanctions. US sailors did board a Soviet ship headed for Jordan, but let it sail onwards after they determined that the goods were not bound for Iraq. Some senior officials in the Pentagon hinted that the US is planning to have a permanent force in the gulf which would include several permanent army and air force bases. C ivilian leaders denied the story.

Moscow was also in the headlines this past week due to Gorbachev’s plans for economic reform.

Last weekend, tens o f thousands marched to the Kremlin and demanded that Prime Minister Ryzhkov resign because o f his opposition to radical reforms. Gorbachev is being opposed by some people in the govern­ ment who fear that implementation o f the radi­ cal economist Shatalin’s plans could lead the nation to lower living standards and collapse o f the government. Rhyzkov later announced that he would resign if the national legislature passed a plan that would call for a 500 day transition period to a free market economy, and not change on October 1, as Gorbachev had previously called for. However, legislators seemed discontented with the three economic proposals presented in the past week (the three plans are Gorbachev’ s, Ryzkov’s and a more radical 500 day plan), and attacked all o f them.

The Parliament later called for Ryzkov’ s resig­ nation, and members blamed him for the eco­ nomic problems and said that his plan could not

help. In other news concerning the USSR, Gorbachev met with two high ranking Israeli diplomats. It was the highest level meeting since the two countries broke relations in 1967.

In South Africa, black leaders urged an end to the tribal fighting that has claimed over 800 lives recently. The government’s security forces cracking down on the tribal violence were criticized by Mandela as having a “ license to k ill.” The ANC had an emergency meeting on the tribal war and accused the government of siding with the Zulus. The ANC also claimed that the government was not doing enough to stop the violence, so President de Klerk issued a special panel to investigate very incidents of violence. At the end o f the week, ANC leaders agreed to meet with Zulu leaders to discuss an end to the fighting.

Polish Prime Minister Jaruzelski announced his intention to resign and let Poland become a full democracy. Poland was one o f the first countries to move towards a more democratic system.

It appears as if there w ill not be peace in Cambodia soon. The four factions in the civil war did hold some peace talks in Thailand, but they broke down after disagreement over the rW)le o f Price Siahanouk.

Liberia is also still in conflict, as rebel groups are battling with each other and with a Peace keeping force composed o f troops from other West African nations.

US troops stationed in the Philippines were ordered to stay on base last week due to talks between the US and Philippines government over the future o f military installations (namely, Clark AFB and Subic Bay naval base) in the country. President Aquino called for the “ or­ derly withdrawal" o f US troops; the US said it was prepared to withdraw but wants plans de­ layed until the next century.

would be generated.

The trade deficit surged to $9.33 billion in July, up $4 billion.

Stock prices slipped lower, and the Dow went below 2500 on Friday although it closed at 2512. However, it is not just the US market that has been down recently- most major stock mar­ kets around the world have declined since the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait.

Charles Keating was indicted on 42 criminal counts and is in jail. Bail is set at $5 million.

As a result o f increased fuel prices, there were reports that the US was exporting more oil to other countries where gas prices are even higher. Some major airlines announced price hikes due to the increase in gasoline prices.

Government economic reports show that Ihe US is being hurt by increased oil prices, and fed chairman Greenspan warned the congress that the US was moving towards a recession.

G-7 leaders announced they would meet in

Washington to discuss increased oil prices, in­ terest rate increases and the decline o f the dollar.

In the past year, the dollar has dropped over 20% against the West German Mark, the Dutch Guilder, the Belgian franc and the French franc.

In addition, it has over 10% against the yen and the pound in the past three months.

Sports News The Toronto Blue Jays moved to one game ahead o f the Boston Red Sox in the battle for the A L east.

In the NFL week 2 games, Phoenix defeated Philadelphia, the Bears moved to 2-0 by defeat­ ing the Packers, and the 49ers defeated the Redskins. Miami, Cincinnati, LA Raiders, San Francisco, Chicago and the Giants are all 2-0. com piled by George M . Regnery Newspeak S ta ff

Get a Clue!

Join N e w s p e a k a n d get involved I f you are interested, send y o u r name, box num ber, and telephone num ber to box 2700.

National News Supreme Court justice nominee Souter’s confirmation hearings ended after 40 people testified for or against him. It appears as if Souter w ill be in the ideological middle, al­ though he did face opposition from some women’s and abortion rights groups. He is ex­ pected to be confirmed.

Voters went to the polls in both Oklahoma and Massachusetts. In Massachusetts, voter backlash against incumbents was widespread as Boston University President John Silber won the Democratic nomination and w ill face Re­ publican W illiam Weld. In Oklahoma, voters passed a resolution that would lim it the state legislators to 12 years. The resolution won overwhelmingly, and got support from rich and poor, and Democrats and Republicans. This fall, Colorado voters w ill vote on a similar issue, although they would also lim it the terms of national representatives and senators.

DC mayor Marion Barry w ill not be retried on drug and perjury charges in which there was a hung jury. He was found guilty o f one count of possession and w ill be sentenced for that charge on October 26.

A four year old girl in Maryland became the first person to receive gene therapy, in an at­ tempt to cure a genetic disorder.

N ASA cancelled the launch o f the Space shuttle Columbia for the fourth time since May. Economic and Business News Atlanta won the bid to hold the 1996 Summer Olympiad, defeating Athens and four other cit­ ies. Officials from Greece wanted the Olympics to be held in Athens because 1996 would be the 100th anniversary o f the modem Olympic. The 1896 summer Olympics were held in Athens.

Officials estimate that Atlanta could hire 84,000 people as a result and $3.5 billion in revenue

SOCCOM M PRESENTS: S u n d a y S e p te m b e r

“Star Wars”

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Tuesday September 25,1990

NEWSPEAK

Page 3

SP O R T S

W P I

B o o te r s

by G regory H u m o ra

The WPI men’s soccer team lost their third game in a row last Wednesday night by a 4-2 margin. As has been the case the last few times, the Engineers had some strong spurts but could not maintain the flow consistantly. Coach Alan King led the lineup slightly before the game bringing freshman Brian Boucher and sopho­ more Ross Weyman into the starting rotation. It was Weyman’s first start at sweeper back which allowed senior Peter Francis to move up to the stopper position. M IT got on the board first in the 22nd minute banging in a loose ball that got behind goal keeper Greg Humora. The visitors tallied again ten minutes later, this is time o ff a corner kick. Tech struggled to get through the half. Despite the team’s mediocre play King

lo s e

W o m e n ’s X - C o u n t r y

by C h ristin e C lifto n

Despite the lengthened, confusing race course at M IT on Saturday, September 15, the WPI women’s cross-country track team cap­ tured the Engineer’s Cup for the third year in a row. WPI literally ran away with the race. With one o f the lowest team totals every o f 19, they outdistanced second place M IT with 48 points and RPI with 67 points.

O fficially, freshman Karen Daly won the race. Five of the next six places were held by WPI runners, including Det Carraway, Jenn Harmon, Tracy C lifford, Susan Daly, and Kelly McQueeney. Also running the race were Athena Demetry, Maura Collins, Chris Clifton and Kathy McKenna. Jen Do and Kate Knapp

to

M IT

and many of the players were still confident.

The confidence proved justified as the Engi­ neers controlled the play at the beginning o f the second period. The comeback bid began at the sixty minute mark with sophomore Matt Cote converting a di­ rect k ick from twenty yards out. Cote connected again less than ten minutes later using his head after Weyman fed the front line a dangerous ball to the twelve yard line that the M IT defense was unable to clear. But that was the end o f the comeback. M IT was quick to answer taking advantage of a defensive lapse. The confidence h ad all but vanished at this point. The visitors pounced on another loose ball in close with just under ten minutes to go to seal the win. Sopho­ more Joe Manorelli came o f the bench with a strong game for WPI.

ta k e

C u p

were unable to run that day.

An under-supervised, confusing course at Franklin Park turned a usual race into an adven­ ture for the three lead runners including WPI runner Maura Collins. At a critical point on the course, no one was present to turn the runners in the correct direction, and the three lead runners turned right instead of left. When they reached the finish line they found themselves disquali­ fied and tired afterextending an already long 3.8 mile course to 4.3 miles. It was a major disap­ pointment for Maura Collins who would have captured first place.

Hoping to continue with the successful start this season, the women’s cross-country team w ill be racing at Babson with Framingham.

They w ill definitely be sure o f this course to avoid any more DQs.

Tech Harriers blaze Franklin Park

by D a v id Cortese

The WPI Cross Country Team set Franklin Park on fire last Saturday as they convincingly defeated M IT and RPI to win the annual Engi­ neers Cup. In their first meet o f the year WPI runners took five o f the top ten places to easily outscore their rival tech competitors.

Senior Dave Berthiaume was the meet’s overall winner as he sailed over the course to take first place in a time o f 27:52. He was followed almost immediately by fellow seniors

W P I m e n ’ s soccer te a m fig h ts fo r a goal a g a in s t C oast G u a rd .

Carl Benker (3rd) and Mike Cummings (6th).

To round ouf the top five, frosh Asbjom Hansen (8th) and junior Dave Cortese (10th) added much depth to an outstanding Tech finish. This marks the second time in the past three years that WPI has won the Engineers Cup. The men’s Cross Country Team in currently ranked eighth in New England and w ill hope­ fully continue to climb up the polls as the season goes on. (Frosh hopeful Chad Schools was unable to attend the meet due to a previous engagement)

B TERM W E L L N E S S P H Y S .

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What is Wellness?

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.;

Class will include non-competitive and fun exercise.

For more information, call: Judy Soderlund, Phys. Ed. Dept. x5588 or Madeleine Cohen Langman, Counseling and Student Development Center, x5540

NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTO / BRENT HILLER

W P I w o m e n ’ s fie ld ho ckey takes on S M U la st T h u rs d a y n ig h t.

Page 4

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NEWSPEAK

A d ffla ta ^ ^ jffih id

Tuesday September 25,1990

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Arts and Entertainment

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We’re on Film Hardware Blew

by G e o ff L ittle fie ld a n d J im Ropp

Geoff: Greetings and salutations, loyal read­ ers! This week, Jim and I are reviewing the latest sci-fi/horror “ thriller” on the big screen line-ups “ Hardware.” The film is set 2000 years in the future. The world has gone to pot due to war, environmental negligence, and general human ignorance. Dylan McDermott plays a scavenger who searches for old scraps o f tech­ nology to sell (a pastime that seems rather commonplace) and Stacey Travis plays his art­ ist girlfriend. Coming back from his latest excursion, he picks up the remnants o f some sort o f robot he takes to be a maintenance droid to give to Travis as a Christmas present (nothing says ‘ 1 love you’ like...). W ell, surprise, sur­ prise, the robot turns out to be the newest model o f artificially intelligent combat robot that still has some semblances o f sentience. When it gets enough power, it rebuilds itself using the junk lying in Travis’ apartment she uses in her sculp­ tures. It then proceeds to terrorize her and kill several visitors after usurping control of the electronic doors, thus blocking her escape.

McDermott is out o f the picture, but returns for the climactic battle at the end. Personally, I think “ artificially intelligent” should be used to describe the scriptwriters and director instead of the robot.

You want to take over before I get too angry, Jim? Jim: DISAPPOINTED!! This was the first word uttered upon leaving the theatre. Geoff and I had hoped that we would be able to see another good “ cyberpunk” sci-fi film (there are a few), but instead, found a lame attempt at what

could have been something cool. Perhaps I should mention what we actually did like before we tear this apart. A t first, I could almost deal with its shortcomings as some well composed settings o f the ruined post-apocalyptic world lead to some truly demented images and charac­ ters. This, with one o f the characters. Angry Bob, played by Iggy Pop, lead us to believe that the story was going to be interesting to say the least. Angry Bob, although amusing, turned out to be a D.J. and never made an actual appear­ ance. To add to the demented atmosphere, the film had a good soundtrack that included the Damned, Ministry, Motorhead, and, o f course, Iggy Pop. Unfortunately, all o f this was drowned out by the other annoying parts o f the film , specifically, the characters, the robot, and the script in general. The best character was otjly given a few minutes at either end o f the movie, probably to keep everyone from leaving right away, and the remaining cast, aside from Angry Bob, was either so annoying or dull that I wished that the robot would hurry up and k ill them all off. The robot itself also turned out to be a bit o f a letdown and when you actually did get to see it, it looked like some bad combination o f the terminator skeleton and the “ mess” at the end o f “ The Fly” (mind you, those were well done.) Finally, the script was fu ll o f superficial, pointless dialogue and the story itself never seemed to lead anywhere... it was almost as i f it was over just as it started.

Geoff, how many panes o f glass C AN one person crash through?

Geoff: I ’m not sure Jim, but I don’t think it ’s as many as Stacey Travis went through.

The more I think about this movie, the more I hate it. When we left the theater, I was feeling

Poetry reading at Assumption: An entertaining experience

by D a vid Dem pster

On Monday, September 17, Pulitzer prize winning poet Mary Oliver read from her numer­ ous collections o f poems in front o f a standingroom only crowd at Assumption College.

Her poetry reading was surprisingly enter­ taining. I went there with a rather pessimistic attitude and did not know what to expect. Mary O liver told several humorous stories about her poems and poetry between readings and read from several different books. She also had some interesting stories to tell about what “ inspired” her poetry. She told o f a Cyclops kitten, a turtle she found on the beach, and swans that fly into Provincetown, among others.

She read many poems about nature and ani­ mals. She carried the theme o f fish and fishing through the first part o f the reading and made a nice transition to poetry about swans and geese.

She also read several melancholy poems about death and everyday life.

Most o f her poems were written in free verse and did not rhyme. She read some “ skinny poems” which were designed to “ move along” faster. They had less punctuation, fewer words per line, and there were only a few sentences in each poem. These poems were designed for the “ non-poetry” reader, a person who just reads a poem out o f a magazine. They are much easier to read and they capture the attention o f the reader and hold the attention fo r the duration o f

the poem.

One poem that I really enjoyed was “ Bud­ dha’ s Last Instruction.” This poem told of the last day the Buddha lived - thoughts about a d ifficu lt life and his last look at the crowd. She had two main “ foci” in this poem; the sunrise which was moving forward and the narrative of the Buddha which was being told backwards.

She changed the tone o f her voice to illustrate this.

The Buddha’s last day contrasted with the rise o f the sun which was “ bearing down” on the reader. The poem itself was well written but the reading o f it and the power in Mary O liver’s voice was incredible. She was able to “ capture” the audience and almost involve it in this poem.

Another poem which was well done was simply titled “ The Fish.” It was the second poem she read. It told o f how the fish she caught died a slow death, how she cleaned it, ate it, and “ the fish became” her. This poem was accom­ panied by a humorous introduction about her first and last time fishing. I thought this poem was captivating because it was about everyday life and the audience could relate to it.

Her reading ended by her answering ques­ tions and criticizing Beacon Press for not pro­ ducing the second publication o f her new book.

This diatribe was quite amusing yet serious.

The poetry reading was in parts funny, sad, and serious. It was surprisingly good and I believe most o f the young audience felt that way also.

SO C C O M M P resen ts:

“Caddyshack”

J

quite let down. Now, I ’ m feeling quite cheated.

Being a fan o f the recent cyberpunk movement in both print and celluloid, I was lured to this fi Im by the si ick advertisements that now seems to refer to some other movie.

First o f all, i f this story is R E A LLY set 2000 years i the future, then I ’m a Madagascar Spit­ ting Hamster. I mean, just look at the progress w e ’ve made since 0 B.C. I would think that 2000 years from now, the human race w ill either be extinct or we would have by then at least found a way to make things a little better.

Second, this film ’s shoestring budget be­ came quite a problem. Don’ t get me wrong, there’s actually quite a lot o f good things to be said for endeavors that don’t cost $50 m illion, but only if there is some other redeeming fea­ ture. Instead, I was continuously annoyed by low calibre acting, insipid melodramatics, at stupid fractal imagery.

Finally, (w ell, not really “ finally,” but it is the last thing I ’m going to say about this lame

attempt) as Jim said, the most interesting char­ acter was another nomadic scavenger shown at the beginning and end o f the picture. What w riter in his right mind would actually spend 10 minutes or so setting up a character at the start o f a story only tocompletely forget about him until the very end??? The director would have done better to keep the scenes at the beginning with the Nomad, cut out all the trash in the middle, and made a 20-minute short feature ending with him walking away across the desert to sell to M T V or some movie channel.

W ell, this movie obviously didn’ t impress me very much, so I give the token slug-on-astick and a gallon o f pith.

Jim: What more can we say? Actually, “ Hardware” had a very “ cult movie” feel about it, perhaps we would have enjoyed it more i f we had treated it as such. Perhaps not. I give “ Hardware” a beached whale and a plate o f dried spaghetti. As a new category, G eoff and I also give this film an “ Audience Annoyance Factor” o f eight.

99

F o ru m

T h e a tre

by E r ik C u rrin

The Worcester Forum Theatre is running Loot, a play written by Joe Orton, from Septem­ ber 20th to October 14th. The play is a comedy about a the death o f M r. McLeavy’s wife, the struggle over her money, the consequences of her death, and finally the story behind it. Last night, I had the good fortune to see the produc­ tion, and it was great. The play started o ff with the family nurse, Fay, played by Susan Zizza, trying to seduce the newly widowed Mr. McLeavy, played by Warren Peace. Susan Fizza played the seductress and slut well in this scene, seeming only to be interested in his money while telling him differently. The play is deservedly named Loot, for not just Fay, but all the characters seem to struggle over money throughout the play.

As the play progresses, we meet Hal (Robert F. McCafferty), the wayward son who callously handles his dead mother’s body as if she were an object instead o f a real person. Hal is involved in a scheme to hit the bank with the undertaker, Dennis, played by Todd LeClaire. The hilarity o f Hal’ s antics with his mother’s body was outstanding, although a bit disquieting. He hides his mother’s body in the closet, stuffing her in on her head, so he can hide money he stole from the bank into her coffin. In fact, the whole play was humorous on one hand, but a little disquieting on the other.

A twist to the plot comes with the entrance of Truscott (played by W illiam C. Sigalis), a man dressed in a trench coat and a Sherlock Holmes type hat, saying he’s from the water company, when the audience knows fu ll well he’s a detec­ tive. Sigalis does a terrific job playing the gullible detective. He tells the story o f the nurses dead husbands, notice the plural, and also te llso f how they all died of violent deaths. From this point, the audience knows what the nurses real motivation for marrying Mr. McLeavy, i.e. his money, fo r his dead wife left Mr. McLeavy her money in her w ill.

One of the funniest parts o f the plays comes near intermission where Fay and Hal have the body wrapped in a sheet, for they have taken o ff her clothes, as to have no evidence which the

p re s e n ts

“ L o o t

police can trace the culprits. In this scene, the detective, still proclaiming he’s from the water company, sees the shrouded corpse and says “ W ho’s mummy is this?” , and the son responds “ That’s my mummy.” It is ironic that Hal, who tells the truth throughout the whole play, is never believed, but the cleverly conceived lies o f Fay and Dennis are. That is just one example o f the irony in the play, there were also others.

The play is full o f clever one liners, delivered mostly by Fay, but also stemming from the detective and Hal also. For example, when the detective says that he was on the “ Limbless girl k ille r” case a few years back, someone asks “ What kind o f a person would k ill limbless girls” ; his reply: “ No, it was the limbless girl who was the kille r.” Also, another good one liner comes when the detective says “ I ’m no fool,” and Fay responds “ Your secret is safe w ith me.” And for you feminists out there one o f Mr. McLeavy’ s lines “ My wife is a women, intelligence has nothing to do with it.”

The play ends with Mr. McLeavy being arrested, although he is the only innocent person o f the bunch. The detective is cognizant o f both Fay’ s murdering o f M r. McLeavy’ s wife and the bank robbery o f Dennis and Hal. But he is not immune to bribe, and after a bit o f wheeling, they cut him in fo r twenty-five percent o f the loot. This dig into the police force is a main theme in the play, w ith lines like “ Who told you the police were out to help people?” , said by the detective and other assorted satiric comments.

Also, the theme o f the power o f money appears a lot in the play.

The themes o f the play seemed to be death, corruption, greed, and incompetence o f the police. The play conveyed these serious themes very well in a comic way. The actors were outstanding, and the producer Brian Tivnan and the director Craig Foley really deserve a big hoorah for the quality o f the play and setting.

Students need not pay a lot o f Loot to see this play. Full-time students get in for six bucks with a valid ID. AH you have to do is get there fifteen minutes before show time (currently at eight o ’clock). It’s well worth the money, and I encourage anyone to attend, unless o f course you do not like being shocked, in which case the play is better avoided. Have fun!

W edn esd ay, S ep tem b er 2 6 th

8 :0 0 PM In G o m p e i ’s

FREE!

Page 5

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday September 2$, 1990

Arts and Entertainment

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by J e n n ife r Kavka Newspeak S ta ff

On Tuesday nights, the Social Committee puts on movies. I decided togathersome friends together and go to see “ Sid and Nancy." Now I hadn’t even heard o f Sid Vicious or the Sex Pistols before I met my roommate but I decided to go anyway. M y roommate and her friends put on black make-up and painted their nails black before going. 1 had no idea why until I saw the movie. Well anyway, about eight o f us went to Fuller Labs and were about one fifth o f the audience. After a few previews from 1986, the movie began.

The movie takes place in England where Sid is part o f the popular group call the Sex Pistols.

He and his friend spend about the first fifteen minutes o f the movie drinking, burping, and making other bodily noises. While he and his friend thrashed their “ friend” Linda’s house, Linda and Nancy continue their drug habit. The next scene o f importance takes place outside the hand out bar where Nancy takes money from Sid to buy him drugs and never returns until they just happen to run into each other again. They end up sleeping together while a friend sits outside the room. Nancy teaches Sid a new habit - heroin. The first dose sends Sid to the bath­ room, ill, but that doesn't stop him from con­ tinuing the bed scene with Nancy. Well, any­ way, I ’ m sure you really don’t want me to go into any details so I ’ ll just say - don’t let those black fish-net stockings get in the way. Eventu­ ally Sid breaks away from the band and his drug addiction grows worse. It’s horrible to watch two grown people deteriorate throughout the

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After a successful - albeit hectic - tour year, the WPI Glee Club is once again embarking on a series o f performances In the New England area and abroad. But first, a brief overview of last year is in order.

Our first concert o f last year was at Parents’ Day with the Regis College Glee Club. Our first exchange concert that year was with the Whea­ ton College Chorale, directed by Professor Charles Fassset, and consisted o f music from our concert in Montreal during the previous year. Because o f our March 1990 tour o f Spain, the majority o f our pre-tour concerts were with the Regis College Glee Club, headed by Profes­ sor Sheila Vogt. This was to get the two cho­ ruses used to working with each other as well as to learn the repertoire. The largest pre-tour concerts were the Vespers concerts on both campuses and our last concert before departing for Spain.

The repertoire consisted o f several spirituals.

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We w ill also perform two Christmas concerts at Regis and WPI on December 2nd and 6th, respectively. Our final 1990 concert w ill be in Saint Patrick’s Cathedral in New York on Sun­ day the 9th, with the Wells College choir. We w ill be in the city from the 7th to the 9th — the Christmas Season. St. Patrick’ s Cathedral is situated on 5th Avenue, across from the Rockefeller Center and there can be as many as 3,000 people in the cathedral at any one time during the holiday season.

Now that I ’ ve stated where we’ve been and where we’ re going, it’s time to let the reader know who we really are. We are engineers and scientists who have established an “ esprit de corps" through music; getting the best o f both worlds, breaking the impression that the sci­ ences and the arts do not mix. We are not all professional singers, but one would be surprised at what discipline and spirit can accomplish.

Our singing is consistently improved as we sing with other colleges, and WPI gets a good bit o f exposure as well. We are gentleman songsters upholding a tradition of excellence. You are invited, come sing with us.

Is yoga without danger?

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who Sid Vicious was and realize how much drugs can ruin someone’s life. This is a good movie to see i f you or a friend has a drug problem because if this won’t convince you not to do drugs, then nothing can.

Even though this movie is far gone from the theaters. I ’m sure you can rent it at your local video store or borrow it from a friend. It’ ll open your eyes to reality and w ill prove a point, although it may be deeply hidden for some people.

c o n c e rt s e a s o n

smaller separate works, and the “ Mass in G M inor” by Ralph Vaughan Williams. It was such a success that the Minister of Culture has invited us back to Spain to sing during the Mozart Festival in 1991. We are still consider­ ing it.

After the tour, we sang with the Wells Col­ lege Choir, directed by Professor Crawford Thoburn, in Aurora, New York. This was the second concert we had performed with Wells that year, the first being a fall concert at Trinity^ Luteran Church. Our final concert was on Alum ni Weekend in late D-Term, in which we were joined by Wheaton, Regis, and our own Women’ s Chorale, Brass Choir, and String and Wind Ensembles — in addition to our own alumni.

After singing in Convocation, we are now preparing to get reacquainted with our friends from these colleges. On November 9th through the 11 th, the Wheaton College chorale w ill host us for a concert there. On the 17th and 18th. we w ill sing with Wells College on their campus.

by B rya n t O 'H a ra

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The actors and actresses deserve the biggest awards possible. 1just felt so bad for Nancy and Sid and what a waste their lives turned out to be.

If a movie can generate some feelings for me, then it gets a thumbs up. It was a true story and was depicted as real. Some humor was mixed into it but the only part I found funny was when a guy was swinging from the door frame with a banana between his legs and another guy caught it between his teeth. I guess you have to see it for yourselves to get the whole effect. Now 1know

movie from a drug dependency. Their love affair and his singing career rapidly come to an end. The movie ends in a very symbolic way involving a taxi and a pizza place I wouldn’t even dare to venture to. The movie is a tragedy about tragic circumstances involving a rock star and the pressures one can succumb to.

Since I did not like the music before I went except for Sid’ s song “ My Way” which 1 was forced to listen to my roommate, I can present an omniscient point of view. The movie was good.

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Many o f us have a fam iliarity o f some sort or the other with the word “ Yoga.” As the com m u-. nication gap is bridged between cultures far­ away in terms o f distance and essence, the real meaning o f the words imported from other cul­ tures often get distorted. The literal meaning o f Yoga in Sanskrit (an Indian language as old as the Indian civilization) is “ union.” The actual meaning o f this Yoga is implied in the union o f the “ s e lf with the “ divinity.” Any process that aides in this ultimate union or takes an individ­ ual through a path that leads to the final goal is termed as some type of Yoga. Thus a varieties o f Yogic techniques were devised by the ancient seers for example Sankhya Yoga (through rea­ soning), Bhakti Yoga (through devotion), Karma Yoga (through performing own duty), Dhyana Yoga (through meditation). Another type o f Yoga which is popular in western culture is Hatha Yoga. This is the science o f learning some postures by practicing, which can make the internal organs, systems, and the body in general more healthy and fit to pursue the other kinds of Yoga.

In present day civilizations, where we learn to attach great importance to material wealth, we tend to forget the questioning faculties o f our mind as to what is the real meaning o f life. This probably happens because such pursuits do not lead us to any direct material achievement.

Thus we keep on conditioning our mind to survive in a competitive society and eventually accept that sress and disatisfaction is a fact of life. In this way we are never known to “ Happi­ ness” in our life. The essence o f Yoga is to revive these faculties that discondition our mind and shows us a way to experience happiness irrespective o f the external and human condi­ tion we live in. Now a natural question arises!

How does Yoga really work and what are the palpable benefits that can be derived from Yoga? However it should also be remembered that like any other method or technique, im­ proper practice o f Yoga motivated by greed can lead to the downfall o f an individual.

The Indian Students Organization at WPI has arranged a lecture on "The Pschophysics of Yoga: Is it without danger?” which is dated for Wednesday, September 26th 1990, and w ill be held in Kinnicutt Hall, SL 115 at 7.00 pm. Mr. Johan De Cocker w ill tell us how Yoga relates to our physical and nervous system and what are the favourable parameters that lead to the state o f Yoga. Mr. Cocker has been practising Yoga for the last eight years. He w ill explain by means o f suitable charts or demonstration o f how Yoga works. He w ill also entertain a question and answer session which w ill be followed by a session o f meditation for ten minutes. In this lecture you w ill derive the benefit o f not only making you more knowledgable about Yoga and dispel some o f yor doubts but also experi­ ence what meditation is all about ( if you wish participate).

NEWSPEAK

Page 6

Tuesday September 25,1990

LETTERS

Don’t renovate Gompei’s!

To the Editor: I just wanted to say... I think daka’ s moving into the pub and serving pizza, is agood idea, BUT I do NOT think that the pub portion o f Gompei’ s should be renovated by the school, UNLESS by renovation they merely mean fixing up a really beautiful place with a whole “ pubbish” mystique o f its own. I

know, a few people like Chris think it’s a real dungeon, but the majority o f people I ’ve talked to like Gompei’ s and think that remodeling it with some ultra-modem scheme would totally destroy its unique charm. Completely remodeling Gompei’ s would be like killing what’s left o f the WPI plan... it would hurt like hell.

W ell... since I ’m already writing, I

may as well comment on the ultra­ good editorials aimed towards the freshmen. Yeah, freshmen, everything in those editorials telling you to go and get up way before class starts and do every suggested problem, etc... well that is very good advice. BUT, let’ s get real - 1 wouldn't do it. I don’t think you guys can do it for long either (I knew I w ouldn’t do it, so I started out my

freshmen year that way). Hey, I have to admit though, for the first day a LOT o f freshmen seemed to follow that advice (people were heading towards their classes fifteen to twenty minutes before they started!). Anyway, here’s my “ advice” to you: You w ill soon figure out what homework you can get away with not doing, and what classes demand that extra hour o f studying

non-assigned (but suggested) prob­ lems. I know, this sounds like lousy advice (especially to. the professors reading this), but it’ s true. I don’t know o f anybody who has done everything asked or suggested to them - maybe somebody out there did, i f so, then I congratulate you.. I don’t envy you, but I congratulate you...

W illiam Katzman '92

by Athena Dem etry '91 Newspeak S ta ff He a ffilia te d him self with no fo rm a l creed. Yet he was intensely religious.

The forests and the mountains fo rm e d his temple. H is approach to a ll nature was w orshipful.

- Edwin Way Teale, on John M uir As a child, the question “ What reli­ gion are you?” invariably entered into conversations. I learned quickly to preface my answer with, “ you’ve probably never heard o f it," before trying to explain the Unitarian Universalist religion. Many could not com­ prehend o f a religion in which beliefs are not dictated and elaborate ritual is not followed. The U.U. faith broadens the idea o f religion to give each indi­ vidual the freedom and responsibility

to choose a set o f truths that is right for him or her.

In its fullest sense, religion is a devotion to any set o f beliefs which inspires awe, wonder, and respect. A religious person pays homage to his ideas o f spirituality - that which is beyond our sphere o f tangible, material understanding.

Religion is what makes one feel vital and alive. For many, the ache and throbbing sensed while listening to a Handel aria or the spine- chills felt at the height of a thundering Bach chorale constitute re­ ligious spirituality. For others, art may inspire a religious devotion. For me (surprise!), the immense organization o f the Universe and our planet into such a beautiful, stimulating, complex system is intensely religious to behold.

The tenets o f a natural religion are not found in ancient texts or ritual or strict codes o f belief and behavior.

Rather, natural religion is before our very eyes to behold and worshop when we want, how we want. It is dynamic; we move in it and experience it; we are free to question and grow and find comfort and peace.

B e lie f? What do I believe in? I believe in sun. In rock. In the dogma o f the sun and the doctrine o f the rock.

I believe in blood, fire , woman, rivers, eagles, storm, drums, flute s, banjos, and broom -tailed horses (Edward

Abbey).

Behold that all matter on this planet was bom from the explosion, the death, o f a star. That the same atoms in your hand, in the paper you’ re holding, in the rock under your feet, all existed over 4.5 billion years ago as a star.

That a single cell within your body is performing Herculean deeds, ticking out D NA, packaging proteins, feeding itself, powering its dozens o f activities.

That somewhere within that cell’ s

DNA is contained the knowledge o f how it came to be, o f how it evolved from a single cell, to algae, to oceandwelling creature, to amphibian, rep­ tile, and mammal. Behold the land­ scapes, mountains, forests, and shores o f a land that has benefitted from the refinement o f 4.5 billion years. Behold the intricate pollenation strategies o f orchids and irises and the deadly mat­ ing ritual o f a praying mantis.

What is this thing called life? - But / believe that the earth and stars too, and the whole g litte rin g universe, and rocks on the m ountain have life , only we do not c a ll it so - 1 speak o f the life that oxidizes fa ts and proteins and ca r­ bohydrates to live on, and fro m that chemical energy makes pleasure and pain, wonder, love, adoration, hatred and te rro r: how do these things grow fro m a chem ical reaction? I think they were here already. I think the rocks and the earth and the other planets,

and the stars and galaxies have their various consciousness, a ll things are conscious; but the nerves o f an animal, the nerves and bra in bring it to focus; the nerves and brain are like a burning-glass to concentrate the heat and make it catch f ir e (Robinson Jeffers).

The tenets o f a natural religion are not “ what does this religion require me to believe,” but rather “ what does this religion give to me, in terms o f spiritual and mental well-being.” To the most religious naturalists, it gives a resounding jo y and delight in life and living. / am in love w ith this world. I have nestled lo ving ly in it. I have climbed its mountains, roam ed its forests, sailed its waters, crossed its deserts, f e lt the sting o f its frosts, the oppression o f its heats, the drench o f its rains, thefury o f its winds, and always have beauty and jo y waited upon my goings and com­ ings.

- John Burroughs

Sounding Off From Stoddard D e c a p it a tio n

by M a tt M eyer Newspeak S ta ff

When I first conceptualized (nice, big word, lots of syllables, a definite plus) this week’s article, I was plan­ ning on writing an open letter to the people who stole the Goat’s Head to tell them just what I thought about their actions. But, this idea was based on the assumption that the theft o f the Goat’ s Head was for real and not part of the tradition. So, anyway, I had come up with a list o f things I would have liked to do to them i f they were ever caught.

My first thought was to simply decapi­ tate them on the quad with a meat slicer and then display their heads in Gordon Library along with the Goat’s Head do it wouldn’t get lonely. This would have made an interesting Soccomm event; the only one all year where you could buy popcorn in “ motion discom­ fort” bags. Then there were my secon­ dary ideas o f skinning them alive and rolling them in salt and vinegar potato chips or introducing them to bungee

jumping from Bancroft Tower with a bungee cord that is about 6 feet shorter than the tower is tall.

Alas no. Early last Saturday (very early actually) the Goat's Head was returned and as it turns out the whole thing was a sordid twist o f tradition. It seems a group of students (represent­ ing the Class o f ’93) decided they would steal the Goat’ s Head in order to clean it up and have the class year as well as a 100th anniversary logo en­ graved into it. The plan went relatively well but there was one serious snag they hadn’t counted on which was made worse by a few minor details. A second party had witnessed the shang­ hai and wanted something out o f the deal. The first group ignored this re­ quest so no one but the second party knows what their motives were. The second party having been jilted, turned the first group in; and what makes this more puzzling is that they were sopho­ mores also. Some class spirit, huh!

Anyone want to go bungee jumping?

Since the administration and campus

police believed the Goat’s Head had been stolen outright, they acted imme­ diately.

I personally appreciate all the effort the first group went to, but unfortu­ nately their execution (nice word choice) o f the plan was a little flawed.

First o f all we (the Class o f ’93) stole the Goat’s Head out o f turn. It is traditional that we must prove our­ selves worthy by first trouncing the freshmen in the rivalry events, and only then should we steal the Goat’s Head. Secondly, I think an anonymous letter explaining that the act was one o f tradition, not o f larceny, should have been left at the scene or sent to Student Government. This way the campus police and administration wouldn’t

p a rt o f

N e w s p e a k

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The way I figure it (which by no means has anything to do with d iff eq’s, calculus, or any other mathemati­ cal model b.s.) those people involved in this fiasco as well as the rest o f the Class o f ’93 can still redeem them­ selves. I f we take it upon ourselves to organize the rivalry events and do some serious ass-kicking, we can have that group steal the Goat’s Head again (practice makes perfect, right?). This time it would be entirely within tradi­ tion. Besides, we don’t want to be remembered as the class that failed horribly at stealing the Goat’s Head.

Maybe we’ II even be the first class ever to steal it twice in the same year.

As always, box 1589.

- e —MealK Edltor-ln-Chtol Gary DelGrego

B e c o m e

have necessarily taken action. O f course, had they sent a note to Student Government, that would mean that the class officers in no way gave their permission or support to the plan and that makes the action one by a separate group and not o f the class. Ah, yes, the double-edged sword. The third prob­ lem I see with the plan was the time frame. We did take it out o f turn, but that was because we wanted to beat the freshmen to it. Also, because the campus police believed the act was one o f larceny the Goat’ s Head had to be taken out o f the city for the engraving, etc.. Therefore, it took longer than preferable, thus increasing the chances o f being caught.

The Student Newspaper of Worcester Polytechnic Institute WPI Box 2700, Worcester, Massachusetts 01609 Phone (508) 831-5464

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WPI Newspeak ot Worcester Polytechnic Institute, formerly the Tech News, has been published weekly during the academic year, except during college vacations, since 1909 Letters to the editor should be typed (double-spaced) and must contain the typed or printed name ol the author as well as the author's signature and telephone number tor verification. Students submitting letters to the editor should put their class after their name. Faculty and staff should include their full title. Letters deemed libelous or irrelevant to the WPI community will not be published.

The editors reserve the right to edit letters for correct punctuation and spelling. Letters to the editor are due by 9:00 a m. on the Friday preceding publication. Send them to WPI Box 2700 or bring them to the Newspeak office, Riley 01 All other copy is due by noon on the Friday preceding publication (this includes electronic submissions, classifieds, greek and club corners) and must include the author's name, telephone and box number. We reserve the right to edit all other copy. All ads are due by noon on the Thursday preceding publication. Articles may be sent via the Encore by mailing them to our account ("Newspeak").

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by A lto n Reich Newspeak S ta ff

Beth and I started LaMaze class on Wednes­ day, it was perhaps the most interesting two hours o f my life. Contrary to popular belief it has nothing to do with LaManze and my wife w ill not learn to scream like a Ferrari, and I feel perfectly justified in killing those individuals who would suggest such (you know who you are). Anyway, being in a room full of very pregnant women put a new perspective on your life. Especially all the rules that you have to remember in order to stay alive. Chief among these is don’ t be between a pregnant woman and the bathroom. Your wife might simply push you aside, but someone else’ s is more likely just to run you over.

W ell, I ’ ve learned all sorts o f things in the past few weeks. For example, last week we went to a class on breast feeding. Sounds innocent enough, right? Well we get there and

the nurse teaching the class gives out black and white cut-away diagrams o f the female breast. I never knew that such an innocent looking lump o f flesh could conceal such a complex interior structure. It was at this point I really began to learn really fascinating things. Did you know that a rubber baby bottle nipple allows fluid to drip out continuously? But not so a breast. The female nipple has eight pores that gently spray out m ilk. I ’ve begun to think o f Beth as being a two cylinder fuel injected engine with 8 valves per cylinder (I can assure you that she appreci­ ates this to no end, and.as a result wanders around muttering things about engineers under her breath).

Anyway, this week my fuel injected darling and I began LaMaze classes. The first thing that impressed me was that the nurse teaching us has four kids o f her own. I find that I learn more when I have some proof that the instructor knows what she’s doing. It was a bit like being in a W PI lecture because the first thing she

Campus papers battle censorship (CPS) — Amid threatened lawsuits, flurries o f new rules and a campaign to remove an administrator from office, three campus news­ papers mounted efforts in mid-September to fight what they say are attempts to control what they report.

At the University o f Michigan, new rules imposed by a representative o f the school’ s Board for Student Publications have “ seriously threatened the control o f the (Michigan) D aily’s 25 student editors,” said Editor-in-Chief Noah Finkel.

At California State Polytechnic University in Pomona, former Poly Post adviser David C. Henley got his job back after threatening to sue the school.

Cal Poly Dean James Wilson had dismissed Henley three weeks after Henley wrote and published an editorial charging that “ we have people here (at Cal Poly) who think it is heretical for the Post even to question authority or univer­ sity leadership.”

Wilson thought the editorial “ heretical” enough to dismiss Henley from the paper.

In a letter, Wilson wrote, “ your final editorial in the Poly Post did not convey the kind o f leadership that I expect from a media faculty member who has many students under his/her tutelage.”

But in mid-September, Henley said the school offered to reinstate him soon after he threatened to sue. He decided to wait a year before returning to the paper because Cal Poly already had hired another adviser. “ I feel vindicated,” Henley said. “ They made a mistake, they apologized and it ’ s over.”

And al the State University o f New York at Brockport’s Stylus, editor John Dahlia sent out

M W

R e p e r to r y p r e s e n ts th e

press releases in mid-September asking for support to stop student government officials from allegedly trying to control what he printed.

Last spring, student politicians obliquely threatened to cut student funding of the Stylus, asking for more favorable coverage o f the stu­ dent government at the same time it grudgingly approved the paper’s budget. Dahlia said.

Dahlia now wants to remove the paper from direct student government control by forming a “ student publications board” that would oversee the Stylus.

It is just such a board that is disrupting operations at the Michigan Daily, Finkel said.

Nancy McGlothlin, whom the publications board appointed to keep on eye on the D aily’s operations, opened the term by imposing sev­ eral unusual rules on the newspaper staff.

Among other things, McGlothlin limited editors to inserting only two late-breaking sto­ ries or photos in each edition o f the paper. She also ruled that stories, once laid out and pasted down, could not be changed.

Editors traditionally keep changing, updat­ ing and fixing mistakes in stories until printing presses start rolling.

Finkel also claims McGlothlin has tried to take editorial control o f the paper by examining all stories as they come out o f the computer printer.

Finkel said the newspaper staff is trying rally students and alumni to have McGlothlin re­ moved from office. “ A lot o f students have shown some con­ cern,” Finkel said. “ We’ve had great support from the alums (o f past Daily staffs).”

McGlothlin said she had no comment.

T h e a tr e C o m p a n y , E tc . w o r ld p r e m ie r e o f

KILLING “BOB” a p la y

Page 7

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday September 25,1990

handed out was a syllabus/homework sheet.

Then we went over some definitions (“ Ve can­ not speak ze same language vithout common definitions” the unknown professor) some o f which I actually knew. After we were given the rest o f the handouts (90% useless) we really got down to learning. We all got on the floor with our pillows to try some stuff out. It must have looked funny; me, a huge pillow, and my little wife.

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(CPS) — Chatham College has decided to postpone deciding whether to become the latest women’s college to allow men to enroll.

Jane Beckwith, Chatham’s public affairs director, said the 121-year-old Pennsylvania college instead has hired four consultants to help it find ways — outside of going coed — o f increasing its enrollment, which has dwindled to 650 students.

Similar enrollment drops, which can cause severe financial problems, have convinced a number o f women’s colleges to start admitting men in recent years.

The students at the women’s colleges, how­ ever, typically protest vehemently when admin­ istrators do it.

Students, faculty and alumnae of M ills Col­ lege in California virtually shut down the school in A pril, when trustees there announced they would make the school coed.

On May 18, M ills ’ Board o f Trustees re­ versed itself, saying it would try to keep the school exclusively female. “ In a way, (the student victory at M ills) gave us a lot o f encouragement,” said Amy Raufman, a junior at Chatham.

In A pril, Chatham’ s trustees had said they would vote, probably in October, whether or not to make Chatham coed.

P la c e

WPI Bookstore undergoing renovations (WPI News Release) The WPI Bookstore is in the process o f renovations. The institution o f special sections dedicated to WPI authors, Worcester area publications, international travel books and New York Times best sellers w ill soon be followed by the rearrangement o f the store’s physical layout.

WPI professors and department heads are aiding in the expansion of the store’ s trade book section, which w ill contain material relevant to courses currently in session. Faculty written publications now in stock include “ Design Problem Solving Knowledge Structures and Central Strategies” by David C. Brown (CS) and B. Chandrasekaran, “ Foundations o f Opti­ cal Waveguides” by Gilbert H. Owyang (EE), “ Electrical Engineering for A ll Engineers” by W illiam H. Roadstrom (Professor Emeritus EE) and Dan. H. Wolaver (EE), “ Thinking the Un­ thinkable: Meanings o f the Holocaust” by Roger S. Gottleib (HU), “ As I Lay Dying: Opera Libretto” by Laura Jehn Menides (HU), “ Fundamentals o f the Finite Element Method”

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In mid-September, the trustees said they would wait to vote on the issue until consultants offered other ideas for saving the school. “ The coed issue is secondary,” Beckwith said. “ Like most liberal arts colleges, we are looking at our goals and mission.”

She said the uproar at M ills didn’t influence Chatham. “ I never got the feeling that people were being reactive to M ills,” Beckwith noted. “ We were really listening to what our students and alumnae were saying (last spring).”

Many said they did not want men on campus. “ People are still really against it (going coed),” Raufman reported. “ I hope that (Chatham) always remains a women’s college.

I f there’ s one student like me (who likes an all­ women’s college) or one m illion, I think they should keep it all women.”

S till, Raufman doesn’ t foresee a wild, M illstype protest if the trustees ultimately decide to admit men. “ We'd never be able to do anything like that,” she said.

Raufman explained that many students at Chatham are older women who are returning to college. “ A 40-year-old woman isn’t going to shave her head,” she quipped, referring to one o f the tactics used by M ills students.

by Hartley Grandin (ME), and “ The College Success Workbook” by James E. Groccia (D i­ rector o f Counseling and Student Develop­ ment). The store also carries Peter Lang Pub­ lishing’ s series o f WPI Studies in Sciences, Technology and Culture.

The Worcester section features a number of books on the c ity ’ s history, including “ Worc­ ester’s Victorian Splendour” by WPI under­ graduate Michael Shorr. The international sec­ tion contains travel books on cities and coun­ tries participating in W P I’ s Global Exchange Program, honored by the hanging o f their re­ spective flags at the store’s entrance. Custom­ ers interested in ordering flags for themselves can do so at the back desk.

The store has also begun to carry books on the New York Times best sellers list. Initial titles include “ Four Past M idnight” by Stephen King, “ Among Schoolchildren” by Tracy Kid­ der, and “ The Old Silent" by Martha Grimes.

The section w ill be restocked regularly through NACSCORP’s new release program.

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I love Beth, but when she dresses just right, she looks about 16 years old. I get the strangest looks from people when we go out and she’s dressed that way. I feel like hanging a sign on her, “ She’s OLDER than I am. Honest.” But I digress, there we are on the floor, and she breathing. She’s breathing and so am I, face it what else is there to do. It was, dare I say, fun.

And then, before I knew it class was dismissed.

So we took all our stuff, including homework and headed out.

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Page 8

NEWSPEAK

P o lic e c r a c k o ff c a m p u s (CPS) — The school year has opened with a seemingly unusual number o f mass arrests at campuses nationwide.

A number o f private student parties, a mainstay o f the season as collegians return to campus, have eroded into confrontations, sometimes violent, with police.

Big parties, sometimes spilling out­ doors from apartments and fraternity houses, have ended in clashes at Bowl­ ing Green State University and at the universities o f Arizona, New Mexico, Missouri-Columbia and Southwestern Louisiana, a irin g other campuses, in recent weeks.

Observers cite relatively new drink­ ing age lim it laws and a new campus willingness to crack down on student drinking for the increased number of confrontations.

Students say their social lives effec­ tively are being pushed out o f bars and sponsored campus functions and into

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(CPS) — Dr. Reginald Fennell goes to great lengths to make his stu­ dents think about AIDS. For example, the bearded Fennell sometimes w ill arrive at his Health Education for AIDS class at Miami University in Ohio dressed in a green dress with a pink hat and shoes. He w ill call himself A biline Bertha Stinence, or A.B. Stinence (as in “ abstinence” ) for short. “ Some reports in journal articles say that humor is the better way to go” when teaching about AIDS, Fennell explained.

A private company called College Condoms sells condoms that come in

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p a r tie s unsupervised private parties. “ There’s the broadening propensity for people to go to private residences, where they party hard, long and nois­ ily,” said Kevin Scully, police chief in Burlington, Vt., home o f the Univer­ sity o f Vermont campus. “ The bars aren’t as crowded as they used to be a couple o f years ago,” observed Marty Freeman, head o f Vermont’ s student association, “ and every year, residential life policies get stricter.” “ The general feeling you get is that they're moving toward a dry campus.”

Now many schools are trying to break up, or at least regulate, the pri­ vate student parties, too.

Many collegians think their “ un­ spoken rights as college students are being violated,” said Felix Savino, head o f drug and alcohol program at the University o f Wisconsin, where Madison police have been busy break­ ing up large private parties this fall.

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late fifties, the CDC says only people immunized before 1957, those who have since been exposed to the measles virus or those who have been revacci­ nated in recent years are immune to the disease.

Hundreds o f colleges now require students to show proof o f immuniza­ tion to measles before being allowed to register for classes.

Despite the precautions, a nation­ wide campus measles outbreak last March and A pril prompted quaran­ tines, and forced schools to rearrange or postpone activities.

The Florida Institute o f Technol­ ogy, Ferris State College, the State University o f New York at Brockport, Colorado School o f Mines and Colo­ rado State, Creighton, Michigan State and Florida A & M universities were among those afflicted by the disease.

A t the University of Georgia, where 44 people came down with measles in May, the state Division o f Public Health declared a medical emergency that threatend to postpone June com­ mencement ceremonies.

Colorado State was forced to reor­ ganize its commencement exercises, holding several small ceremonies in­ stead o f one large one.

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(CPS) — A measles outbreak at In­ diana’s Vincennes University has brought back chilling memories o f last spring, when measles disrupted classes and commencement exercises at cam­ puses all over the country.

Health watchers say they’re not surprised by the seemingly unusual fall measles cases, but are not w illin g to say they portend another college epi­ demic soon. “ We’ve been seeing outbreaks throughout the year." said Dr. Desiree Rodgers o f the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) in Atlanta, although none specifically on college campuses.

Rodgers said the CDC has recorded 20,115 cases of measles so far this year.

Last year at this time, only 11,837 had been documented. “ People have not been appropri­ ately immunized,” Rodgers explained.

After finding three cases o f measles at Vincennes, administrators offered voluntary measles vaccinations to all o f its students, faculty and staff.

People bom after 1957 who were immunized as children should be immunized again, the CDC says.

Because doctors generally changed to another, less effective vaccine in the

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school colors at the universities o f Southern California, California at Los Angeles, California at Santa Barbara, San Jose University and other cam­ puses in Arizona, Florida, Iowa and Kansas.

It’s all to get students to feel more comfortable discussing AIDS, said Fennell, who added the class has been full almost every semester since he started teaching it in January, 1988. “ I ’m certainly not trying to make light o f a serious disease like A ID S,” Fennell said. “ I try to do things to make my stu­ dents think.”

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Tuesday September 25,1990

Page#

CLU B C O R N ER Alpha Phi Omega Keith is a no-good, dirty rotten nerd!!! - so, what is new?

Wow, look at that! Even drunk, Kevin kicks B M ’s Butt! New Party Theme: APO Country & Western Revival Party (please forward to Stephanie). Eat a pickle up and die. You look good in blue, you look good ion red, but most importantly you look good in blue. Heh, heh,...

Wow, this club stuff. Hey is that a garlic pickle??? I hope so.... What was that sign on C e tta ’ s sh irt?

B ackstage, underage, adolescent..how ya doin’, fine, sugarpie, I sigh... I like to do the W ild Thing.

Service Veep- I ’m voting for the first mute to run! I ’m gonna stop now! Paul is here!

FEEEESH! I need a party theme....or else....

ASME Thanks to all o f the members who attended the general meeting which was held Monday the 17th. Our first BBQ o f the year w ill be held Wednesday September 26th at 6:00 on Higgins lower lawn. Members o f the student and senior section are all welcome to attend. The topic o f the Design Contest w ill be announced at the BBQ. The contest itself w ill be held in the be­ ginning of B term. We would like to get T-Shirts made so we need some creative ideas. Don’ t forget coffee and donuts every Friday morning from 8-10 outside o fH L 109.

We would like to host an interesting speaker or plan tours o f a local company, but we need your support and suggestions. I f you have any other ideas for future activities please let us know. Our mail box is located in the ME office.

I f any one needs applications for membership, check the board outside o f H L 109.

Hope to see you all at the BBQ tomorrow!

Camera C lub Hola! Thanks to all the people who attended the first meeting. This year begins a new era.

Welcome to the new and improved Camera Club (as you w ill see by all o f our activities this year.) A t the first meeting we discussed the future o f the club which includes photography trips, museum trips, and seminars about photog­ raphy led by club members, our advisor, as well as guest speakers. We also discussed interac­ tions with other campus clubs such as Masque, the Men’s Crew team. Pathways, and Peddler.

The next scheduled activity is a trip to the Worc­ ester Center for Crafts on Wednesday, Septem­ ber 26th. We w ill be meeting in front o f the

library at 5:15 to leave for the gallery. The show is “ ARO UND THE H IG H W A Y : 1-290 from Hope Avenue to the Lake” by Peter Faulkner.

The photographic style is pinhole and infrared.

Peter Faulkner w ill be there to give us a tour o f his work. The event should last about 1.5 to 2.5 hours. Everybody is welcome, so we’ ll see you at the library! We decided that our regular meetings w ill be on Mondays at 7:00. The first of these w ill be Monday, October 1st, 7:00 pm, in Atwater Kent 116. This meeting w ill present technical aspects o f using a camera such as shutter speed, aperture, light meters, minimum time/maximum black tests (to set your cameras ISO/ASA correctly), and the Zone System. See you there!

Com m ittee o f Concerned Students Greetings concerned students. Thanks to all who attended our last meeting. I agree, it was a bit bumpy - but wait untH next week. I think some information may circulate that may be o f interest to you. You’ll have to show up to find out.

Thursday, September 27, 8:30 pm Student Govt / Panhell / IFC Office (Near Wedge) M en’s B owling Club Why do people bowl? To get the pins down.

Why do they get the pins down? Because they get good at it. Why do they get good at it? So they can get high scores. Why do they get high scores? So they can get their name printed in Newspeak. Why do they get their name printed in Newspeak? So they make the Men’ s Bowling Team. Why do they get on the Men’ s Bowling Team? So they can bowl at the meets. Why do they bowl at the meets? T o get pins down. Why do they get the pins down?...

What a confusing mess. I get dizzy just thinking about it.

If there is anything important in this article, here it is: Bowling Team Practice is Tuesday & Wednesday from 2:30 - 4:30 at WPI Lanes.

(Mark, write this down!)

Oh yeah, Mike, I don’t think Carl Lewis could outrun that throw!

That’s it fo r now... JD. M en’s Glee C lub W ell, another season is underway for the WPIMGC. Already two singing engagements and better yet, the mixer at the Rathskeilar and subsequent BBQ at Regis, have proven that

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“ wine, women, and song” is an appropriate phrase to describe the activities o f our group o f gentlemen. A hearty word o f thanks to every­ body who did anything - large or small - to make the year a success so far. But the best is yet to come. On the way are trips to Wells and Whea­ ton, as W ell as Christmas Vespers with the Regee women. In the very near future is Satur­ day’ s climb up Mt. Monadnock. Remember to pack your lunch, and D O N ’T FEED THE BEARS. It’ ll all be easy to tell them apart Shaggy w ill be the one singing all the Rush tunes.

Welcome to all our new members. Ken, Ted, Marty, Dave, Yama, Ralph, Jack, Greg, Greg, Dan, Tom, Mathias, Prof. D: I t ’s good to have you with us. The sound shows the best potential since I was an itty-bitty freshman. (Now I ’m an itty-bitty senior.) Big apologies i f I forgot anyone’s name. If I did, I offer you a free guest appearance on the next Club Comer.

More apologies to all o f you for being so late with the first WPIMGCCC. I promise it won’t happen again.

WE CAN USE MORE MEMBERS — NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. (Just come join us - 6:30 - Tues & Thurs - Alden Hall - Janet Earle Room) In closing, a little W PIMGC Trivia...

1) (for a stick o f gum) What is Louis’ middle name??

2) (for 2 sticks o f gum) Who is “ Mom” ??

3) (for a stick o f previously unchewed gum) When did JD first start at WPI?? (I don’ t know, either, but it’s not B.C.) Peddler The Peddler meets every Wednesday at 6:30 pm in the Peddler Office between Alden and Riley Hall.

A t last weeks meeting we discussed a new theme, cover and exciting new sections. There were many new ideas and much enthusiasm in creating next year’ s book!

SENIORS!!!!! We need your help in design­ ing the 1991 Peddler. Attend the next meeting to see what you can do to make this snapshot o f your Senior your something to remember!

Assistance w ill be needed soon in the taking o f Senior Photographs.

For more information call the Peddler (831 5245) or write to “ The Peddler.” Next meeting: Sept 26 @ 6:30.

Pershing Rifles Hey, who’ s roll is it? We should change ourselves to “ Three P/R,” but that sounds like a robot out o f Star Wars.

Chip: “ Do I know you?” Steve: “ Start Suckin’ babe!” Casey: “ Hands Across Amer­ ica?” Boos needs a ____, like Lawendowski had a kardon, and Rex had a, well, you know.

We still love you, Alicia.

Congrats and Best Wishes to A llynn and Chris. Best o f Luck, Love, Happiness + Mushy things from Echo-12.

Pledges, keep those pins out and visible!

(Huynh!)

Rappelling FTX is on its way. Preview is at MS I/II Leadership Lab. Come on down A N Y NEW PLEDGES! Basement o f Harrington, classroom #28. Fol­ low the Army ROTC Signs on Thursday, 27 Sep 90 at 1915 Hrs. The Blood makes the Grass grow...

Society o f Women Engineers The ice cream social on September 11 was very successful with about 60 members partici­ pating. Executive officers are busy contacting their committee members to plan upcoming activities.

I f you were unable to attend the meeting, but are interested in joining a committee, please contact the exec, officer in charge: Membership Drive - Beth Landers (Box 1962) Publicity Committee - Kim Tharp (Box 1261) High School Outreach - Beth Landers (Box 1962) Company Tours - Kim Tharp (Box 1261) Fundraising - Val Kschinka (Box 2116) Social - Sue Carlson (Box 1783) 1991 Regional Conference - Terri Cordeiro (Box 585) A ll members signed up for the Region F Student Conference at M IT on Oct. 12-14 should have their $35 checks in the SWE M ail­ box A S A P !! The banquet, career fair and work­ shops promise to be EXCELLENT! The g irl scout badges are THIS SATUR­ D A Y , Sept. 29. Members signed up for the “ Putting it Together” badge should be in Foun­ der’ s Country Kitchen by 8:00 A M and mem­ bers signed up for the “ Aerospace” badge should be there at 12:45 PM. Call Cori at 7566575 i f there are any questions.

SWE’s Cookie-gram Sale w ill be going on from Thursday - Friday 11:00 A M - 1 :00 PM by the mailboxes. Send cookies to your pals - 3/ $ 1 .0 0 !

Student A lum ni Society Welcome back to all returning members o f SAS. Get psyched for a prosperous and funfilled year! Thanks to all o f you who attended the Informational last week. It was a great success and we saw quite a few new faces. The planning retreat on Sunday also went really well... we set the goals for the year, welcomed new members and discussed the upcoming events SAS is planning. Homecoming is right around the comer. SAS w ill be very involved this year, running the King and Queen vote table and the Parade o f Floats. I f anyone is interested in working on Homecoming, or in joining SAS in general, please contact M ike Shorr, Box 2178.

Vegetarian Society I would like to thank everyone who came to the spaghetti dinner. Hopefully we can start working on some o f the projects that were sug­ gested. Our next event is a free lecture about Transcendental Meditation scheduled for Mon­ day October 1st at 7:00 pm in Salisbury 104.

Everyone in the WPI community is welcome.

Rugby Team W omen’ s Crew The Rugby Team is starting up for this fall season. Our first game is against N ichol’ s college at their field in Dudley M A. on Saturday September 22. The team is shaping up and looking good and it promises to be a good game.

The team has been practicing 4 times a week and even attending aerobics classes. Our first home game w ill be against Johnson State College, on Saturday October 6 on Lake Av. (Near Lake Quinsigamond). Come to the game, all are welcome to participate. Our Fall Schedule is: September 22 at Nichols September 29 at Univ. Lowell October 6 Johnson State HOME October 7 WPI Alum ni HOME October 13 St. Anselm’s HOME October 20 at Plymouth State October 27/28 New England Rugby Union College Tournament Second Division - TBA November 3/4 New England Rugby Union First & Second Divisions - T B A A ll games are scheduled to start'at 1:00 pm, but are subject to changes.

We also have a spring break tour planned.

Interested in participating in the team or just supporting please contact: President John Sturrock 792-9682 or Match Secretary Chris Struven 755-2604.

T u e s d a y , Science Fiction Society

S e p t e m b e r 2 5 th F R E E !

SFS TEMPORALIZES: Mary Zarkoffalot found out that she’ s related to JR’ s uncle’s w ife ’ s sister’s nephew’s preacher’ s penpal twice removed. We voted and came up with “ Whinnie the Pooh-Bah” as the official name for the Vice President. Sue Eileen plots to overthrow herself and take her own money.

October sixth is the date that we w ill go to King Richard’s Fair. So watch next week.

Quote O ’ the Week: “ Oh, great. Another [word deleted to protect your sensitive ears] Heather” — Heathers

Hello, all trogladites and trogladettes. This is the SFS column. This is your brain on the SFS column. Any questions? Last week on AS THE

Congratulations to the team for finally pull­ ing our act together and having great psyche for the fall season! Sue, keep up the good work but watch out for all those other cars in the road!

Many special thanks go out to Cathy and Kevin for helping us on such short notice. “ Welcome Aboard” to Jen L., Doreen, Brenda. Lara, Tracy, Jen F., Meredith, Delphine, Senya, Cathy and newcomers Sara and Kris! You all have great potential and drive, keep up your enthusiasm. It’s a long hard haul to the races but the rewards make it all worth while. Novices - look forward to pasta/banana dinners, videotapes, the novice banner and many long hours on the water.

Varsity: for those o f you who don’t know, the Schoenbrod is much tipsy-ier than the Vespoli; so keep it set! Amy no “ clam digging” this season and Casey/Leilani one o f these days we’ ll get the cox boxes so you’ ll know what’ s going on. Holly and Adrienne keep your heads in the boat. Athena and Monique are just plain powerhouses. Three cheers to Tara for that summer workout in Philly. Jen, watch out for mattresses on lofts! Deana, glad to see you back, stick around for the spring it ’s the balls!

Sue, sorry to break up bow pair but keep up your strength going you arthritic! Pam please keep our funding up so we can get a launch and megaphone and all those kegs! “ That which does not k ill you; makes you stronger.” - Nietzche. AM F

Page 10

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday September 25,1990

G R EE K CO RN ER Alpha C hi Rho Hello to all out there, from the depths of the Cave. It has been a busy couple of weeks here at 8 Boynton and elsewhere. The peak was certainly the annual Sex on the Beach party, which was as great a party as mine eyes have ever seen. (So great that we blew out the stereo system, and the party stayed on!) The Around the World party was a success too. Thanks to all the brothers, in and out of house, who helped sponsor it. Also thanks to 45 Fruit St. for the Tuesday night gathering.

Intramurals have been going well, with A and B team volleyball I -1, Table Tennis 2-2 and 1-1, and A-team football 0-0-1 from a tie game with T K E . Keep up the good work guys.

There has been “ work” of a different kind going on, as some residents have found out on those morning^ when it is harder than usual to get out of their rooms, let alone bed. All I can say is that Boynton St. has about had enough, you’ll all get your own soon enough.

The brothers of Alpha Chi Rho helped build a playground in Auburn, and might even go to play test it someday. Thanks to everyone who helped out with the philanthropy project Wednesday and Sunday.

Condolences go to the A X P Zoo/Aquarium, for the loss of their beloved friend Jake. For a real thrill, go in and tap Sparky on the nose!

Congratulations this week to Boneheads S w in d le , Scream er, and T w in k ym an ; Harty®Partiers Bonger and “ Do ‘Em Double” Barry; and to Pete. Rush has started, so all freshmen are invited down for all events, or just to escape the wrath of D A K A . W e hope to see you.

That’s all for this week - M IK E Alpha Gam m a Delta Hey Gams! What a super parents’ reception you put on, a super time was had by all. To all those fine apple pickers we thank you for the munchies in our boxes. Looking forward to the A T O cocktail party - A G D ’s getting psyched.

Also start warming up for our 6.2 mile walk we have coming up, and make sure everyone sponsors a gam. Congrats to our fine chapter for attaining the academic award at Greek Kick Off, job well done! Happy Birthday to Rhonda, Becky, and Sarah.

W e ll guys this has been one happening week for us. Notes from the house... The guys down stairs... chapter room hours are a blast. Jackets are on the way - finally! What do you guys have to say about the sophomores entertainment last Friday? No one can touch that! Remember, Rachael’s roses... very inspiring.

Delta Phi Epsilon Hello again, Deephers! 1hope everyone had a good time on Saturday! It was great to see our parents on campus again.

The football game was fun! Go Val, Amy, and Laura! Keep cheering and pepping! Thank you to the sisters who participated at Greek Kick-Off. Let’s all show our support at the sorority Kick-Off, Thursday, Sept. 25th. W e hope to see a large freshmen attendance.

L e t’s have a big hand for out resident artist, Aimee. Also congrats to our artistic hopefuls, Am y, Val, and Wanda! B y the way, what is Delta peacesign Epsilon? Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon? Laura, you’re the coolest -love Am y and Nancy. How long before you see those brass buttons shine again, Nancy?

Kris - what is 207.74? Amy, I see that gleam in your eye atain - spare me! B y the way, West Point still rules! Ready for another Phi Sig Sig/ Deepher road trip? The Worcester-New York Bobo express is up and runnin’! Kate, twist my

arm and I ’ll talk to him. Congrats to Amy -you got what? Thanks Coy. Did your father bind your feet when you were little? What are you, a Geisha! K. and Julie-w e miss you! Come visit, or call, Founders 107.

As a final note, rush is only 29 days away!

Get excited and united. W e are “ one voice.” JS L Phi Sigma Sigma Hey dey beedie ho dee o! This is all for Terra’s sake, you must understand. W ell, the Alumni Phonathon is going great. Let’s make sure to give it the old college try and usual Phi Sig Psyche in tonight’s final hours of pleading!

Speaking of psyche, I hope everyone is pumped for the Phi Sig Sig/TKE Volleyball Tourna­ ment. It’s anyone’s game, and just remember, all proceeds go to the National Kidney Founda­ tion and the Special Olympics.

I must express a little heartfelt concern and inquire about the health of those living at the house. It was my understanding that they were apparently under siege of colds and flu. Hope you’re all feeling better!

Taking care of old business, let me say that Parent’s Day was a smashing success. Thanks to Beth Anne and every one who helped out!

Also falling under old business is the Phi Sig Sig/Garret controversy. Inside sources indicate that not only was that replica not built to scale, but it was unforgivable misleading! W e ’re told his nickname is actually “ Stubby.” What a disappointment!

Congratulations to those sporty soccer gals, Dianna, Maryellen, Marybeth, and Deb, who are currently U N D E F E A T E D ! W ay to go, girls! Don’t forget to cheer on out favorite members of the crew team, namely Carmen, Sue and Am y C. A belated happy Birthday to Lisa G. and an early Happy Birthday to Sue T. A few announcements and reminders to put some icing on this cake. Go to the Committee of Concerned Students meeting Thursday at 8:30 near the wedge, and don't forget the tri-sorority function Thursday at 7:00 in the lower wedge.

Our Outstanding Outfit of the Week on a Fac­ ulty Member goes to Provost Diran Apelian, who has been sporting a variety of elegant ensembles this past week. Remember to vote for Danielle and Pete for homecoming and bring a dollar to the meeting tomorrow.

In the personals, a quick question to Jeanette, “ How ’s Theta C hi?” Here’s to Theresa’s 5scoop sundae, and Stacey’s tarot card reading!

(I really hope mine doesn’t come true! Love, the lady of malice and deceit.) A special hello to Cathy F „ because I think she’s pretty funky.

And now, the moment we’ve all been waiting for. Here’s a story about our favorite cracker jack. It seems that Donna-Do-You-Wanna picked up a little “ undersomething" belonging to a certain “ amphibious reptile” at Sig Ep. While we don't really want to embarrass the little darling, I think she does want to, and we think we know with whom! LIT P.

Social: Chris Weinwurm + Sam Tetlow Sports: Frank Ricciardi B.H.Safety Off.: Greg Viscus Pool W.H.Safety Off.: Rob Bokowski O.K.: Lou + Gary D. Song leaders: Cloots, Sammy, Josh, Needlemeyer, Blanch, Chinny, Buks, Zippy, Maborney, Onion, Remdog, Goldfish, Lever, Sphinc­ ter Official Doormat: Zack “ N O T !”

Sports is going very well for S A E behind the coaching of Brian Kraft + Jeff Coy. W e ’re gunning for the sports cup once again! Graffiti party went over really well, as did our comunity service event at the Goddard playground. S A E is expected to have another great rush this year.

Sigma Pi It looks like Sigma Pi ping pong is on the ball (heh, heh) - that’s four victories for Tooz “ Comholes” Campbell (and his sidekick, Dick!) The football team could use some more support, (or something to make them play bet­ ter), so let’s see everyone up at the next game.

Volleyball: I don’t know how we’re doing, so I coiuldn’t tell you (although I suspect w e’re undefeated and will remain so for the rest of the term.)

Parent’s day was loads of fun -thanks to Jean and the stewards for making our forbidden food fantasies come true! I know I made use of the bar facilities so I guess that makes it a success.

(If they don’t segue you there, Evans’ fridge is open toeveryone and Zank. Don’t cost nothin!)

The house is looking good... I wonder how long the carpet will last? W ill it outlive Kirbie?

Graffiti Party this Friday!! DOn’t even tell me it won't be the best ever with bonus daquiris!

Sign up now if you want to go (guys)... because the list fills up fast, and I don’t like to jerk dopey pearle around. Watch for Joe at the party... he’s looking for another gonad to mount on his w all!

Hmmm...what else is happenin? Aha -rush!

Is everybody having fun yet? Last night maybe ... (it was “ dynamite” )! Future up-coming events look like a great time, so let’s get those freshmen and have some fun!

I have come to the conclusion that there is nothing else to discuss. See ya!

Tau Kappa Epsilon Hello and welcome back. W e would like to thank all the memebers of the freshman class who attended house tours and our Monday night B B Q . W e hope you all had a good time and are looking forward to seeing you again. Have you ever wanted to go to Atlantic City, Gamble your life away and W in Great Prizes? Well, here is

Join Now!

your chance. Attend the Annual T K E Casino Night. Yep lots of games of chance and skill in a Casino Atmosphere. And lets not forget the beautiful girls and Great prizes. That’s friday night at 7:30. (Formal Dress is Optional) And don’t miss out on our Big W iffle ball game next Sunday at 2:00 or the special Monty Python reunion we have planned for Monday at 7:30.

Don’t miss it!

Ok, Question Time. What new and exciting things can you do with a bed sheet? No, Toga is an old Idea, a good Idea but old. W e ll an inexpensive Halloween costume? It’s a little early, not to mention it never realy worked for Charlie Brown. Ok, well your Ideas are not bad but I think T K E and Phi Sig Sig have another you might like. How about Bed Sheet Volley­ ball! Yes T K E and Phi Sig Sig are working on an event never before see on the W P I campus, a Bed Sheet Volleyball tournament. Keep your eyes open for more details coming soon.

Congragulations go out to Frater Sean Hogan who last week asked Suzanne Hunter to marry him. So lets pass out thouse Cigars and head for the pond... right Sean? O K also a large round of applause to the T K E Volleyball team who Clob­ bered K A P last week in our opening game of the season. W e also would like to thank everyone who attended our Parents Day B B Q . It was a great time. W ell as I leave you just remember “ 22 days till the B IG move.” Tau Kappa Epsilon - The Time is Now. Zeta Psi Greetings from the bottom of Loch Ness. It’s dark and murky but I can still play checkers with the cretures down here. Sploft is the new lord of the second floor. A ll must bow to its influence, and its spluftitude must be embraced by all.

W hat’s this about a bathroom on the third floor?

Whatever happened to the fire escape? So, technology triumphs again as the newest craze is R-Type and Bonk, overshadowing Spades and Hearts. Complete the limerick and win a free dead-head: There once was a hippie from Worcester....

Stay tuned for the continuing adventures of Negative Man and Burrito Boy, in their valiant struggle against evil food services and Zete stomachs. The half-life of my underwear is exactly the time it takes for patchouli to wear out of a room on the third floor.

Now some real news. Great job on the work party last weekend. It looked good for house tours. Hey freshmen! Rush is here and the Zetes want you! Come on down to the house any time.

There’s lots to do or you can just bum around.

Make sure you have a Rush calendar.

‘Til Charles Manson gets a spluft of his very own, nuff said. ★ ★ ★ WORCESTER S MOST

Recommended Restaurant

(^Acapulco ^

Are you interested in doing

Sigma Alpha Epsilon Congrats to our new officers: Vice-Prez: Brett Taft Recorder: Jason Chin Correspondent: Jim O ’Connor + Josh Onnfroy Chronicler: Jay McGinn Warden: Frank Ricciardi Herald: John Mahoney Chaplain: Sweet Lou Half-Year IFC Rep.: Sam Tetlow Scholarship: Brett Taft CS/PR : Gary D. + Randall Asst. Steward: Merlin Blanch Bove Asst. House Mgr: Tom Roos

-

Graphic Layout Photography Writing Business Advertising

Newspeak is looking for interested people.

If you want to help call us at 831-5464, or write us at box 2700.

Mexican Restaurant

Affordable MEXICAN I AMERICAN FOOD O P E N T I L L 4 A .M .

Caaaal Diaiag fro * *3.95 T A K E OU T S E B V 1 C E

7 9 1-1746

m em eh kkm

S C H O L A R S H IP S , F E L L O W S H IP S , G R A N T S E D ’S S E R V I C E S B O X 3006 B O S T O N , M A 02130

W P I A L U M N I A SSO C IA T IO N

H O M

E C O M

IN G

W

E E K E N D

O C T O B E R 5 - 6,1990 Return to Your Wonder Years a t W PI W ”------ 1 WONDKR I ! Y fa rs <1 Jmstc.r:.'rr^r-'.rsL &M

.........

PA RA D E OF FLO ATS One day left to enter the Annual Homecoming Parade of Floats!

\\ . 1 Y? 1 -- .--;. ■ ■ .....*

Win the Silver Parade of Float’s Tray for permanent display in your organization’s trophy case and victory T-shirts for everyone who helps build the float - up to 50 T-shirts!

Time is also running out for Homecoming King and Queen nominations. Submit both your King and Queen nominations and Parade entry to Chris Savina, Student Alumni Society, Box 306.

Page 11

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday September 25,1990

C LA SSIFIED S Addressers wanted immediately! No experience necessary.

Excellent pay!

Work at home. Call toll-free: I -800-3953283.

A T T EN T IO N 90-91 BS/M S/PhD can­ didates.. the Office of Graduate and Career Plans (O G C P) w ill be having an Orienta­ tion Meeting on Monday, October 1st, at 7:00 pm in the Harrington Balcony. This is an introduction to O G C P and the recruiting process.

Phi Sig Sig how’s the float coming?

Travel/On Campus Sales Rep. Wanted Outgoing, aggressive, self-motivated indi­ vidual or groups to market Winter and Spring Break trips on campus, for more information contact Student Travel Serv­ ices 1-800-648-4849.

Wanted: A clue.

Reply to JT at GweepCo Headquarters.

Hey joey poople - 1 love you!

W hy do people bowl? To put inane club comers in Newspeak.

Interested in animation? Then contact Brian Bikowicz, W P I Box 1065, or email to megazone@wpi.wpi.edu.

Wom en’s Crew - we are excited about all of our novice rowers, Lara, Jen, Senya, Brenda, Tracy, Doreen, Jen, Delphine, Kathy, Meredith, Chris and Sarah. W e’re psyched for the upcoming season!

Yo! Phi Sig sisters -let’s get psyched for Rush!

Brown/W h ite/B lack... Buddhist/M uslim/Christian...Dis/abled... Men/Women, etc. etc. what do we have in common? How do we differ? Discussion group— W P I community. M. Langman, 831-5540.

Newspeak will run classifieds tree tor all W P I students, faculty, and staff. Free classifieds are limited to si* (6) lines Ads of a commercial nature and ads longer than six lines must be paid for at the off campus/commercial rate of $3.00 for the first six lines and 50 cents per additional line.

Classified ads must be paid for in advance.

No information which, in the opinion of the Newspeak editors, would identify an individual to the community will be printed in a personal ad The editors reserve the right to refuse any ad deemed to be in bad taste or many ads from one group or individual on one subject.

The deadline for ads is noon on the Friday before publication.

All classified ads must be on individual sheets of paper and must be accompanied by the writer's name, address and phone number.

Name

Phone

Address

Total Enclosed $

Allow only 30 characters per line

SPR IN G B R E A K R E P S !!!

EA RN $3000 in your spare time. Become part o f a team and sell the best spring break trips on campus. Earn F R E E T R IP S and unlimited CASH$$. Call T A K E A B R E A K now and earn a $100 signing bonus!! (800) 328S A V E or (617)527-5909.

Found: Very nice calculator left at M *A *S*H session. Come to the Office o f Academic Advising and identify.

Hi! You’re pretty ok. - Dog. Y O U ’V E C H O SEN Y O U R M A JO R , N O W W H A T A R E Y O U G O IN G TO DO W IT H IT ? C O M E E X P L O R E Y O U R O PTIO N S AT T H E M A JO R S E L E C ­ TIO N PR O G R A M , 157 W E S T ST., O R C A L L 831-5012 FO R AN A P P O IN T ­ M EN T.

Join the E S P club! A ll levels of ability are welcome. If unable to divine place and time of first meeting, think about joining between 7 and 8 pm weekdays. W e will contact you.

Don’t let it start again! Horrible, terrible evil awaits you!

Z B T pledges are you psyched yet???

Card parties rule gang...let’s get out those aggressions! Greg, you cannot touch the Bword!!! *evil grin* PM S week is hell!

Until next week peoples...

Neo-Tokyo is going to E X P L O D E November 18 in Perreault Hall.

F O R S A L E : Twin bed w/mattress $40.

Computer desk $35. Call 791-3144 or 7921085.

SWE COOKIE-GRAMS 3 Homemade Cookies/M .00 Orders taken in front of mailboxes Sept. 27-28 11-1

Choose to send: Chocolate chip, peanut butter, pinwheels Delivered Monday, Oct. 1st

Maharishi Mahesh Yogi Founder of the Transcendental Meditation Program

If you really want to know how to improve your grades, your career, and your life, there’s an upcoming lecture you shouldn't miss.

Over 1,000,000 students have experienced the benefits of the Transcendental Meditation technique, including:

* increased creativity * increased learning ability * increased intelligence * improved concentration and memory * reduced stress and anxiety * better relationships * improved athletic performance * better grades

Monday, October 1st 7 PM Salisbury Labs Room 104 FREE

The Transcendental Meditation Technique

Page 12

NEWSPEAK

What’s Happening?

Tuesday September 25,1990

T H E O ’S

R E S T A U R A N T

A N D

P IZ Z A

PIZZAS, GRINDERS Tuesday, September 25 8 pm - Cinematech, “ Allegro Non Troppo,” Perreault Hall.

NOW OPEN FROM 7 AM TO 12 MIDNIGHT

Wednesday, September 26 8 pm - Video, “ Caddyshack,” Gompei’s.

M ONDAY TH RO U G H SU N D A Y Thursday, September 27 Sorority Kick Off, Gompei’s.

11:00 am - A l Research Group meeting, “ A Forward Chaining Expert System on a Data Flow Architecture,” FL320.

4 pm - Wom en’s Tennis vs. Assumption.

7:15 pm - Men’s Soccer vs. Babson

REASO NABLE PRIC ES: (INCLUDING THE TAX)

Friday, September 28 11:00 am - Colloquium, “ Report on CQ L90 - Computers and the Quality of Life,” Professor Lee Becker, FL320.

Sunday, September 30 6:30 and 9:30 pm - Film, “ Star Wars,” Perreault Hall, $2.00.

SMALL PLAIN PIZZAS............................. $3.26

Monday, October 1 Exhibit, “ A Bulgarian, Hungarian, and Russian Art Sampling,” begins in Gordon Library.

7:00 pm - Lecture, “ Transcendental Meditation” SL104 7:00 pm - O G C P Orientation Meeting for all 90-91 BS/MS/PhD candidates. Harrington Balcony.

(WITH WPI ID: $3.00) LARGE PLAIN PIZZAS............................. $6.04

Saint Louis University's Academic Year in Madrid COMPLETE CURRICULUM: English, Spanish. Liberal Arts, Business & Administration, TESOL, Sciences, Hispanic Studies

(WITH WPI ID: $5.52) GRINDERS....................FROM $3.00 TO $4.25

SLU In Madrid Is a member of AA/EOE Graduate Courses offered during Summer Session

(WITH WPI ID: $0.25 OFF ANY LARGE GRINDER)

A pply NOW fo r Spring, Sum m er and F all More than 1,000 students in the Program.

Saint Louis University In Madrid Bravo Murillo, 38 Edlflclo Qonzaga, Planta Baja Madrid 28015 Spain Tel: 593-3783

INVOLVED

Contact: Saint Louis University Study Abroad Coordinator Admissions Office 221 North Grand Blvd.

St Louis, MO 63103 Toll-free tel: 1-800-325-6666

(For large amounts of pizzas and grinders, a better price is offered)

FRESHMAN CLASS ELECTIONS

INVOLVED

O ctober 4th and 5th

To run for office you must submit a petition to the Dean of Students office by Sept. 28 at 4:00 PM

Petitions are now available in the Dean of Students Office.

E m e rg e n c y c a re g ro u p c o m e s to W P I There is a new group on the W P I campus this fall. Under the direction of John J. Hanlon Jr.. W P I Public Safety Director, a group of volunteer students are providing emergency medical care lo the enter W P I community in the form of a first responder unit. The students are trained by Sgt. Seven Hill, and officer George Burnham, both of the W P I Police. Once in full operation, the students will provide 24 hour a day coverage.

The service was started as an Inter­ active Qualifying Project advised by Prof. Helen Vassallo. Three students, Kevin L'Heureux, Paul Sincaglia, and William Wong (all Massachusetts

E M T 's ) last year began looking into starting the unit, anil its practicality in the W P I area. This effort was coordi­ nated through the W P I Campus Police and the office of Health Services. It was decided that due to the decreased hours of Health Services, and the in­ creased responsibilities of the W P I Campus Police (the current providers) that a first responder unit was justifi­ able.

Work began last year to put the program in place. The three EM T 's rode on periodic shifts with the campus police to learn their existing proce­ dures. Also, meetings were held with the Department of Residential Life, the

Dean of Students office. Central Mas­ sachusetts E M S office, and the Busi­ ness Office at W P I. Over the summer, medical packs were ordered, bought by Health Services, and uniform jackets were purchased by the Campus Police for the unit. The E M S team is now providing periodic coverage, placing emphasis 011 weekends and evenings, times in the past that have shown the most need. They will also be present at large sporting events, and any other functions that may require their pres­ ence. It is hoped that by C term 24 hour coverage will be provided.

Training courses for interested stu­ dents are being offered starting at the

end of September. This training will be done by members of the E M S team, in accordance with state standards. The course will be about 30 hours long, and includes C P R . controlling bleeding, management of illnesses, and care for other medical emergencies. The team will also include Massachusetts certi­ fied EM T 's. The E M T 's training goes tor 140 hours and covers much more intensely the first responder material as well as detailed anatomy and physi­ ology, advanced care of shock, cardiac care, childbirth, handling motor ve­ hicle accidents and much more. These same E M T 's also work for ambulance and fire/rescue services, some for as

long as 6 years.

Once in full operation, W P I E M S will be dispatched day and night by Campus Police. The E M S crew and Campus Police will respond and deter­ mine if, in the event it has not already been called, an ambulance is needed.

At night, the crew will sleep oncampus in specially arranged sleeping quarters and will respond at any hourto medical emergencies. As a service to the W P I community, and to keep their own certifications up to date, they will pro­ vide courses in C PR and first aid. They also plan to help train the Resident Advisors and the Student Night Patrol in these fields.

L u t z is n e w D e a n o f U n d e r g r a d u a t e S t u d i e s

by Christine C liff ton Newspeak S ta ff The position of Dean of Under­ graduate Studies, formerly held by Professor Grogan, was filled August I , 1990 by Professor Frank Lutz. After receiving his Ph.D. from New York University in 1971 and opening a con­ sulting firm in New Jersey, Professor Lutz came to W P I. Since 1972 he has been a professor in the Civil Engineer­ ing department, the Associate Dean of Projects, the Associate Dean of Under­ graduate Studies, and his current posi­

tion, the Dean of Undergraduate Stud­ ies.

The Dean of Undergraduate Studies “ assures the integrity" of academics for undergrads here at W P I — a "Champion of Undergraduate Stud­ ies.” He does this not by controlling the departments, but by addressing the other areas of academics, those that concern all faculty and all depart­ ments, like the IQ P and MQP. The Dean also helps out with both the admissions and registration processes.

The Dean plays an active role in the many academically focused groups

Open Houses for prosective freshmen scheduled

by Jo h n n a Coggin Associate D irector o f Adm issions The Office of Admissions w ill be sponsoring two open house programs for prospective students and their par­ ents this year. The programs are sched­ uled for Monday, October 8 and M on­ day, November 12.

These days are designed to give prospective students an opportunity to visit our campus and take a close look at what makes W P I such a unique and special place.

The activities will begin in Harring­ ton Auditorium with a presentation of The W P I Plan by Lance Schacterle, Associate Dean of Undergraduate Studies, on October 8, and Francis Lutz, Dean of Undergraduate Studies, on November 12. Visitors will then have a student-conducted tour of the

campus. Following the tour, partici­ pants will select from various aca­ demic department presentations.

The program will also include a luncheon in Harrington Auditorium with music provided by the W P I Med­ win String Ensemble, under the direc­ tion of Douglas Weeks. Lunch will conclude with an Admissions and F i­ nancial Aid presentation.

The afternoon will consist of op­ tions to attend panels concerning stu­ dent life, cooperative education, career planning and placement and opportu­ nities for women at W P I. The Admissions Office is expecting about 600 students and parents at each program, so they will be very busy and informative days.

Anyone having questions regarding these programs should please contact Johnna Coggin.

Associate Director of Admissions.

The Winners...

and committees here at W P I. He sits in on faculty committees regarding aca­ demic policy, operations, and advis­ ing. He’s also a part of the academic council which develops strategic alter­ natives for the school, placing a strong emphasis on the years ahead. As a member of the executive staff, he works closely with the President. VicePresident. Student Body President, and others who will share information and views on the operations of W P I. Professor Lutz is working towards

specific goals that will enhance the academic environment of W PI. Along with the people he works with, they arc considering the possibility of reading days. These would be days in which no classes were scheduled to allow the students to reflect on the assignments more and actually gain a deeper under­ standing. A project which holds great importance and a bundle of engineer­ ing opportunities is the opening of the Project Center in Puerto Rico in which Prof. Lutz is actively involved. This

center would be the second one he's helped to establish as in 1974-75 he established the Washington D.C. cen­ ter. This new center will open the door to Latin and South America. Also currently underway are projects to promote women to attend W P I. The position of Dean of Under­ graduate Studies presents major re­ sponsibilities; however, it is clear that the position has been appropriately filled with someone having a sufficient background in the area.

A bit of advice from SMART/SADD

by Bria n O 'H a ra The absolute worst thing a person can do after drinking a few. other than passing out and not waking up. is grab his or her car keys and take on the road.

The second worst thing is to wander around a party (or campus) and make a walking hazard of oneself. I'm not only referring to stumbling, falling, passing out, or vomiting around other partygoers, but also to making a gen­ eral nuisance of oneself. This is often caused by making false assumptions and plain ignorance in terms of alcohol responsibility and awareness. Believe it or not. there is more to alcohol aware­ ness than being aware that it’s in front of you and that it’s relatively easy to obtain. I hope to illustrate some of this in the following story, some of which may sound familiar: A certain person who I ’ll identify as Joe Schmodecided to got to a party and got very plastered on a nigh-200 proof

punch. Joe had five or six 12 oz. cups of this mix.

Mistake Number I : Joe's limit was 5 beers — not cups of jet fuel, but beers. You're guaranteed to be rela­ tively safe and have more fun if you know your limit and stick with it.

Joe also figured he would pace the drinks so he could "ride the buzz."

Also a mistake: After about two hours he experienced rebound. You see. the effects of alcohol have many stages not just buzzed, drunk and passed out.

Not long after the buzz phase, a person will become agitated, which can lake on many forms. In Joe's case, he be­ came increasingly obnoxious, and at one point began to make loud com­ ments to some of the female partygo­ ers.

Four hours into the party. Joe no­ ticed he was getting more than a bit sloppy, so he tried to find ways to sober up quickly. He saw a pot of coffee that had not been emptied and put away.

The tradition continues F re s h m e n a n d S o p h o m o re s s q u a r e o f f o v e r th e p o n d The rivalry between the freshman and sophomore classes can trace its history back to the early days of W P I. In the past the rivalry has been com­ posed of many events. Over the years, however, most of these events were phased out leaving us with the paddle rush, rope pull and basketball game.

In an attempt to revive the competition between the classes, a more extensive schedule o f events has been planned forthe upcoming year. The class that is victorious can then rightfully engrave their class year upon the Goat's Head.

Homecoming holds the special significance as the kickoff for the rivalry. Because of this we would like to announce the first event, the rope pull, to be held one half hour after the football game in Institute Park.

Freshmen should contact Paul Wojciak at 831-7719 and sophomores should contact their class officers for organizational details. Hope to see you at the pond!

The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat.

Participants from a past rope poles learn it first hand.

Since he was too wasted to heat il in the microwave, he took an empty mug and poured himself some. This was Joe's thisrd mistake: One drunkard plus one cup o f coffee equals one wide awake drunkard. Nothing, I repeat, nothing makes a drunk sober except time. The same thing goes for the morning alter.

Joe was destined to make one more mistake that night. After being propo­ sitioned by him, one of the women told her boyfriend, who happened to be the host of the party. After awhile, he and a few of his friends found Joe. told him to leave, and offered him an escort home. His last mistake was this: He argued with them. He was carried to his apartment by four guys. Halfway there. Joe pulled a technicolor yawn and felt better.

Until the hangover came.

T o avoid being another Joe Schmo, follow the bits of advice in the story.

Y o u 'll still have a good time.

and the Losers

Page 2

NEWSPEAK

Tuesday October 2,1990

NEW S International News Iraq was further isolated from the rest of the world last week, as its bor­ ders became even more sealed. The UN security council voted I4-I (with Cuba voting against) to impose an air embargo against Iraq, which would include all flights but those for “ hu­ manitarian” purposes. There still are some problems about the embargo that need to be worked out-mainly those that deal with civilian aircraft attempt­ ing to fly to Baghdad. Iranian officials arrested 29 people who were attempt­ ing to smuggle food into Iraq, which shows that Iran may be abiding by the UN resolution to end trade with Iraq.

The U S Navy stopped a ship bound for Iraq in the Red Sea by firing over its bow.

While the blockade was tightening, the rhetoric was increasing.

Last weekend, before the air embargo was imposed, Saddam Hussein threatened a wide scale war in the Mid East that would include Israel if the Western nations tried to "strangle” its citizens.

At the UN, French President Francois Mitterand denounced Saddam Hussein and his government. Bush said that there would be no negotiations with Iraq- and that they must pull out en­ tirely from Kuwait.

Hussein re­ sponded that Iraq was prepared to fight to retain Kuwait "for I.(KM) years.”

Hussein later added that an American conflict in the Mideast would be blood­ ier than Vietnam.

In Washington, Turkish leader Ozal said that he would support armed intervention in Iraq if the UN was to support such a measure.

In Baghdad, Iraqi officials de­ manded a list of all non diplomats stay­ ing in diplomatic missions. Secretary of State Baker claimed that Iraq was going to kill Americans and others who hid western hostages, although Iraq laterclaimed that the warning had been issued to their.citizens only. Iraq also ordered all former Kuwaiti citizens to apply for Iraqi citizenship.

The US is aiding its allies in the region- there is talk of an immediate sale of $7.5 billion in arms to Saudi Arabia, which would be the first part of a $20 billion plan. Turkey was re­ warded with greater economic and military assistance. On a side note, the World Bank issued a statement that said they might need more money to handle shocks from the gulf crisis.

South African President F. W . de Klerk visited Washington, and was the first South African leader in over 40 years to meet with a President of the United States. Bush praised de Klerk for his “ dramatic progress" in moving South Africa away from Apartheid.

During his three day trip, de Klerk said that he would support the system of one man, one vote if minority groups were guaranteed their rights. He also met with members of Congress and some businessmen to discuss the US role in leading South Africa from Apartheid.

Meanwhile in South Africa, police imposed a dusk to dawn curfew in an attempt to stop the fighting among blacks, although the A N C said its main intention was to create an appearance of calmness while de Klerk was in the US. Mandela’s wife was charged with kidnapping and assault that led to the death of a black youth in 1988.

After a lengthy debate, Gorbachev was given major new powers to lead the economy to one governed by mar­ ket forces. Gorbachev now has the right to issue decrees in just about every aspect of economic and social life until 1992- these include but are not limited to control over wages, prices and the financial system and government budget. The U S S R for­ mally adopted a law that prohibits the state from interfering with religion, and the first church service was held in the Kremlin in over 70 years. The service was led by Patriarch Alexi II of the Russian Orthodox Church, which has been controlled by the Communist Party.

There was a cease fire declared last Saturday in Liberia, and U S sponsored Peace talks have been scheduled in the neighboring country of Sierra Leone.

The cease fire appears to be holding, and U S Marines airlifted supplies to

the capital of Monrovia on Wednes­ day. Monrovia has been with out elec­ tricity, telephone service or running water for over three months.

Filipino President Corazon Aquino said that the she was satisfied with the U S proposal to gradually phase down the use of its Subic Bay Navy base in the Philippines. However, the next day. Communist rebels claimed that Aquino secretly had negotiated with the US to keep its military bases there in the years to come, and they ended a cease fire. Right wing government officials threatened a coup. On Thurs­ day, the Filipino Supreme Court con­ victed 16 and acquitted 20 people of taking part in the assassination attempt against Benigo Aquino, Corazon s husband. The convicted were fined $300,000 and sentenced to life in prison.

A law in India that reserved half of some government jobs for Hindus of lower castes was the source o f many problems in northern India last week.

On Tuesday, two people were killed and seven were injured in New Delhi.

On Wednesday, students rioted and refused Prime Minister Singh's pro­ posal for negotiation, and seven people were killed in 3 cities, as there was widespread rioting across northern India. On Thursday. 15 people died, included a Policeman, as rioting con­ tinued to spread.

East Germany formally pulled out of the Warsaw Pact, and will merge with West Germany on October 3.

Zambia's president agreed to end two decades of one party rule, and agreed to hold multiparty elections. In Portugal, the Marxist Angolan government be­ gan peace talks with the U S backed UN1TA rebels, led by Jonas Savimbi.

Mohawk Indians surrendered to Cana­ dian Police after an 11 week conflict involving a land dispute, because Canadian officials want to build a golf course on what the Mohawks say is sacred ancestral lands. Tens of thou­ sands gathered to see Algerian inde­ pendence leader Ben Bella return to Algiers. Algeria after nearly 10 years exile in Europe. He called for the governments resignation and urged Algerians to fight for Saddam Hussein.

National News The major news of the week on domestic affairs concerned the Budget summit. Congressional leaders must have reached an agreement by October I. or extended the deadline. Other­ wise. across the board cuts would take effect due to the Graham Rudman Hollings act.

Republican Senate leader Bob Dole said that he would support a higher income tax on the rich if there was a capital gains tax cut.

Capital gains are income derived from profit on investments.

Supreme Court Justice nominee Souter was approved by the Senate Judiciary committee by a vote of 13-1.

Massachusetts Senator Edward Ken­ nedy was the only Senator to vote against the nomination. The entire

Senate is going to vote on the nomina­ tion on October 3.

The Magellan spacecraft sent back pictures of Venus- and revealed that there was a massive crater and a solidi­ fied lava canal that was over 20 miles long.

Economic and Business News The stock market hit its lowest point in over 14 months, as it sank below the 2500 level. Borrowed stock, which is used to short stocks, is up 15c/< since July. Shorting a stock means that you borrow it and instantly sell it. Then you hope the price goes down so you can buy it back at a lower price. (Since you originally borrowed it, you have to buy it back eventually.)

Chase Manhattan cut back its divi­ dend. and announced that it would lay off 5.0(H) employees. It appears as if many banks are in trouble- Bank of Boston also cut its dividend, from 31 cents to 10 cents a share. Bank of Boston has the longest history of pay­ ing dividends, and has done so for over 200 years. Bank of Boston also an­ nounced it would lay off 1500 people.

M C A stock prices soared as there was talk it would be taken over by Matsushita, a Japanese conglomerate.

President Bush's son Neil, along with other officials of a failed Colo­ rado Savings and Loan, were sued for $200 million. Meanwhile, Lincoln Savings and Loan President Charles Keating remained in jail because the judge refused to lower a $5 million

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bail.

Junk Bond king Michael Milken of the now bankrupt Drexel Burham Lambert is going to face sentencing.

Prosecutors have urged for a long term prison sentence, while his defenders say he should be sentenced to commu­ nity service.

Honda announced that it w ill make standard two airbags on all cars sold in the US after 1993.

Bank of America and Barclay's agreed to merge their travelers check units in order to compete with the dominant American Express unit.

Sports News The N F L season week 3 concluded.

The Giants overwhelmed the Miami Dolphins, the Kansas City Chiefs beat the Packers 17-3 and the New England Patriots were dominated by the Bengals, 4 1-7. In the locker room after the game, a Boston Herald reporter, Lisa Olsen, claimed that she was sexually harassed by several nude Patriots play­ ers. The incident has caused several people to question whether or not female reporters, or any reporters at all, should be allowed into the locker rooms.

The Oakland A ’s guaranteed a place in the A L playoffs by winning the A L West, and Toronto and Boston remained very close in the A L East. compiled by George Regnery Newspeak S ta ff