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WPI to Induct Six Into Athletic Hall of Fame W o rcester P olytechn ic Institute w ill induct six new m em bers into its A thletic H all o f Fam e d u rin g c e r­ em onies at H om ecom ing, S ept. 17. T h ey are Jo se p h B ro n z in o ‘59 , G eorge E m erso n ‘32, M ary Jane H all-S tim son ‘81, C atherin e M urray ‘86, fo rm er cross country and track coach Frank S annella, and cu rrent w restlin g co ach Phil G re b in ar. T his is the tw elfth class to be inducted into the W PI A thletic H all o f Fam e, w hich now boasts 72 m em bers. Jo e B ro n z in o ‘59 o f A von, C onn., w as a tw o sport athlete at W P I. He captained both the fo o tb all an d b ase­ ball team s as a senior and earn ed a total o f seven letters. A to u g h ru n ­ ning fu llb ack , B ronzino led the En­ g ineers in scoring b oth his ju n io r and se n io r years and fin ish e d w ith 78 career p oints. A fter the co m p le ­ tion o f the 1958 seaso n h e w as selected to the A ll-E ast seco n d team fo r his o u tstan d in g y ear. In b ase ­ ball, he w a s the starting cen te rfie ld e r from 1956 to 1959. H e led th e team in h ittin g during his fresh m an and ju n io r y ears w ith a .361 av erag e and

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M a ry J a n e H a ll-S tim s o n ‘81, o f plished this by fin ish in g eighth at .4 5 7 av e ra g e r e s p e c ti v e ly . Santa R osa, C A , w as also a tw othe national ch am p io n sh ip s in 1931 B ro n zin o ’s baseball career highlight sport athlete, as a m em ber o f the w a s playing on the New York City for the b reaststro k e. He w as also a m em ber o f the m edley relay team in sw im m ing and crew team s. In 1979, Journal A m erican A ll-Star Team d u r­ she placed in tw o ev en ts at New 1930 that set a N ew E ngland In te r­ ing the sum m er of 1956. E n g lan d ’s, and advanced to becom e c o lle g ia te A th le tic A s s o c ia tio n W hile atten d in g W PI, B ronzino an A ll-A m erican b ack stro k er at the record for that even t. A m echanical w a s a m em ber of the T heta Kappa A IA W Sm all C ollege S w im m ing an e n g in eering m ajor and m em ber o f Phi fraternity and received Tau Beta D iving N atio n als in R eno, Pi and Eta Nu academ ic N V. She still hold tw o WPI h o n o rs w hile m ajoring in "[N ew in d u c tee s!a rc .J o sep h B ro n zin o '59, electrical en g in eerin g . He records in the 5 0-yard b ack ­ G e o r g e E m e r s o n '3 2 , M a r y J a n e H a llstroke (0 :2 9 .9 7 ) and the 100serv e d as vice president o f S tim so n 'S I, C a th e rin e M u rra y '86, f o r m e r yard b ack stro k e (1:03.63). s e n io r c la s s as w ell as A civil en g in eerin g m a­ presid en t o f the A th letic c r o s s c o u n tr y a n d tr a c k c o a c h F r a n k jo r, H all-S tim so n is a m em ­ C ouncil w ith h iscu lm in a tS a n n ella , a n d cu rre n t w restlin g co a ch P liil ber if the T au B eta Pi H onor in g honor o f w inning the G r e b in a r ." society. She spent the fall of O utstan d ing S enior A w ard 19 7 9 a t th e W a s h in g to n g iv e n by the v arsity club. P roject C enter and the fall o f 1980 in the A lpha T au O m ega fratern ity at H e received h is Ph.D. from W PI in L ondon, E ngland on an exchange W PI, he w as born in 1909 in C o lu m ­ 1968, and is currently the V erna Rose program . H all-S tim son is currently bia, MO. He atten d ed high school in P ro fesso r o f applied science at T rin ­ a senior en g in ee r for C arlisle A sso ­ P rovidence, RI. and m arried M ildred ity C ollege in H artford, C onn. ciates in Santa R osa, CA. L. H ynes o f Q u in cy , M A , who is still G e o rg e B liss E m e rs o n ‘32, fo r­ C a th e rin e M u r r a y ‘87 o f N orth living in B ran d en to n , FL . He retired m erly of S araso ta, Fla., w as a foury e a r letterm an in sw im m in g . H is P lainfield, N J., w as a w om en for all from the N avy D ep artm en t in 1967 seasons accu m u latin g 10 letters b e­ ath le tic d istin ctio n is th at o f being w here he w as in v o lv ed in the d e v e l­ th e first A ll-A m erican fo r W PI, and tw een the sp o rts o f field hockey, o pm ent o f the w o rld ’s first n u clear b asketball, and so ftb all w hile also to th is date is the only m e n ’s sw im ­ su b m arin e, N au tilu s. He died in p articip atin g on the w o m e n ’s soccer m e r to attain such status. He acco m ­ 1985.

club team and the ou td o o r track and field team during her y ears at W PI. She w as captain for the field hockey, bask etb all and softball team s and she helped to lead two o f her team s, fie ld h o c k e y and b a s k e tb a ll, to E C A C cham pionships ion 1986-87. M u rray ’s biggest accom plishm ents cam e on the basketball court as she finished w ith 1,081 points (sixth all tim e), 641 assists (first all tim e), and 323 rebounds from the point guard p o sition. An A ll-N ew E ngland se c ­ ond team A ll-S tar in 1987, she w as the first w om an to dish out 500 a s­ sists. She still holds the W PI record for assists in a gam e w ith eight which she did tw ice during the 1982-83 season. M urray w as an im portant m em ber o f the 1984 team that w ent to the N C A A tournam ent — the only team to attain that honor. At W P I, M urray m ajored in m e­ chanical engineering and w as a m em ­ ber o f the D elta Phi E psilon sorority. She g rad u ated w ith honors and is a m em b er o f the Tau B eta Pi honor so ciety and Pi T au Sigm a m echani

See Fame Continued on page 2

The Student Newspaper of Worcester Polytechnic Institute

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Volume Twenty-two, Number Seventeen

Miniature golf returns to the quad by Lisa Hastings Director, Young Alumni Program B ased on the w id esp read pop u ­ larity to th is ev en t, th e S tu d e n t A lum ni S o ciety will o n ce again fe a ­ ture the M iniature G o lf D esign C om ­ p e titio n as p art o f H o m e c o m in g W e e k e n d . T h e M i n ia t u r e G o lf C ourse has becom e a cen tral feature o f the Q uad Festival w ith o v e r 300 stu d en ts, alum ni and ch ild re n p lay ­ ing thro u g h last year. SAS invites you to h elp create a m in iatu re g o lf course un iq u e to W PI! Hom ecom ing takes place Septem ­ ber 16-17, 1994. Student oiganiza-

WPI Speaker’s Fund by Chris Jachimowicz Asst. Dean fo r Student Activities T he W PI Student S p e a k e r’s Fund w ill co n tin u e to serve as a fu n d in g source fo r cam pus-w ide speakers and is ad m in istered by a S p e a k e r’s Fund C o m m ittee com prised o f stu d en ts, faculty and staff. T he com m ittee so lic its p ro p o sals and m ak es reco m m en d atio n s fo r up to $ 1 ,0 0 0 in funding for d eserv in g pro g ram s. W hile lectu re rs are a p ri­ mary fo cu s, proposals w ill be ac ­ cepted fo r program s u tiliz in g panel d iscu ssio n s, debates, and film s as w ell. P ro p o sals w ill be review ed on the b asis of “g lo b aln ess” o f topic, co m p leten ess of p lan n in g , and fi­ nancial need. L ast y ear the SSF aw ard ed over $9,000 to speaker p rogram s ranging from S uzi L an d o lp h i’s high energy presentation on safe sex to D avid H o ro w itz ’s com m ents on c o lleg iate co rrectn ess. S tudents, facu lty , ad ­ m inistration staff or o rg a n iz a tio n s w ishing to apply fo r SSF fu n d in g may receive an ap plicatio n by c o n ­ tacting T he Student A c tiv itie s O f­ fice ext. 5291.

tions, residence hall floors and teams o f individuals are invited to design and build a free standing miniature golf obstacle, to be placed on a standard base, that depicts some aspect of WPI life — past, present or future. You can build a replica of a campus building, construct a laboratory model or depict som e aspect o f WPI life. You are lim­ ited only by your own imagination! A panel o f judges will evaluate and score each entry based on achievem ent in three categories: 1) Quality o f C onstruction, includ­ ing visual appeal and craftsm anship 2) C reativity, including innovative use o f m aterials and the idea o f the hole 3) T hem e, based on relevance to W PI The organization w ith the highest aggregate score will be declared the W inner and w ill receive the The Hom e­ com ing ’94 M iniature G o lf Design Com petition Trophy during the halftim e cerem onies at the H om ecom ing Football G am e. The name of the w in­ ning group w ill also be inscribed on the WPI A lum ni A ssociation’s Silver H om eco m in g A w ard p late, w hich dates back to 1967. AGD took the trophy last year, while ACR won the first year o f the new com petition. PARAM ETERS Each team must com plete and subm it the enclosed tour­ nam ent entry form to the Student Alumni Society box in the Student A ctivities O ffice by 5:00 p.m. on Tuesd ay , Septem ber 13,1994. Entry forms have been sent to all student organiza­ tions and extras are available in the Student A ctivities O ffice. Participa­ tion is limited to nine (9) holes; first com e, first served. Once a group has entered, it w ill receive inform ation about the dim ensions and shape of the platform . The platform will consist o f a plywood base at least 4' w ide and 8' long. A few rules and regulations will be enforced. No electricity will be pro­ vided or may be used. Pow er may be generated only by a DC battery pack. (N o generators). Height o f the o b ­

by 12:00 noon on Friday, Septem ber 16,1994. T eam s m ust assem ble their obstacles by m idnight on Friday, so that the G olf C ourse is ready fo rju d g ­ ing and play on Saturday morning. Security has been arranged through­ out the night on Friday to prevent tam pering with the setups. T eam s are asked to disassem ble their holes at 3:00 p.m. on Saturday. The rain loca­ tion for the event is H arrington A udi­

torium ; G olf platform s will be set in Harrington by 7:00 p.m. on Friday evening. If you have any questions, contact SA S m e m b e rs K a re n G o o d e ll (keg@ w pi), Katie Daly (ktd@ W P!) or Cindy M itchell (clm @ w pi). The M iniature G olf Course you create will provide outdoor enjoym ent for all those w ho return to cam pus for H om e­ com ing ’94!

WPI - New promotions and appointments B arbara R odrique has been p ro ­ moted to Program A dm inistrator o f Central Mass. MFG Partnership. B ar­ bara, w ho has been with WPI for al­ most 10 years, formerly held the p osi­ tion o f A dm inistrative Secretary, B u si­ ness A ffairs/Treasury. Celia M cLaren has been prom oted to Supervisor o f Central Mail. C elia previously held the position of lead mail clerk; she has been with W PI since 1987. David Everitt has been prom oted to A ssistan t D irecto r o f H um an R e­ sources. He previously held the p o si­ tion o f payroll m anager for two years. New A ero sp ace S tu d ies D e p a rt­ m en t H ead Lt. Col. Kenneth Stafford has been appointed as the A erospace Studies D epartm ent Head. A native o f E u ­ gene, OR, he received a B.S. degree in mechanical engineering from Oregon State University and his M.S. in A ero ­ nautical Engineering from the Air Force Institute o f Technology (AFIT). Stafford last held the position of Deputy Division Chief, Special O p ­ erations Division, at H eadquarter A ir Force at the Pentagon, He currently resides in W orcester, MA. Stafford replaces Lt. Col. Jam es A. W alsh, Jr., w ho retired after 22 years of military service. W alsh served as the departm ent head for four years.

varsity field hockey and varsity soft­ ball coach as wel I as instructor of Physi­ cal Education. A native of Stow , MA, she received her B.S. degree in m athem atics and secondary physical education. She is currently pursuing her m aster’s degree at Springfield College. Quinn is a former elem entary physical education teacher in the G roton-D unstable Re­ gional School District. C hrista C ham pion has been ap­

pointed w om en’s varsity basketball coach, w om en’s varsity tennis coach and instructor of physical education. Christa received her B.A. degree inbioengineering from Brown U niver­ sity and her m aster’s degree in exercise and sport sciences from Smith Col­ lege. A resident of Northam pton, MA, she w as form erly the coach at the Belchertown High School.

JASON rHILUKOOK / NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTO

F reem an P laza w as to be com pleted in p re p a ra tio n fo r th e first day o f classes, b u t w o rk crew s ra n into m ore steam pipes a n d w ires b u ried u n d e r it th en expected, so, fo r now, co n stru c tio n presses o n .

New C oaches Barbara Quinn has been appointed

Table o f Contents

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stacle is limited to 4'; w eight is only lim ited to w hat the plyw ood base can bear. You may not disassem ble the platform in any w ay. You may not perm anently affix (i.e., nails, screw s) your obstacle to the platform s. F i­ nally, if you plan to use pow er or w ater, you m ust test your design and have it approved before assem bling it on the Quad! Platform s will be set up on the Q uad

................................................ 2 ................................................ 2 Newspeak H u m or ........................ ............................................ 4 ,5 Commentary ...................................

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S eep a g e6

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Announcem ents ..................................... ....................................... 6 ....................................... 8 ....................................... 9

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NEWSPEAK

Wednesday September 7,1994

NEWS

Fame

Arm & Hammer

Continued from page 1

The fam iliar WPI arm and hamm er that sits atop the W ashburn Laboratory building w as taken down this past Saturday for sheet metal repair and to be gold leafed. The work is being done by Alex Johns and Sons o f W orcester w ho estim ate the job will be com pleted within the next 10 days. Johns and Sons will also be regilding the Boynton Hall clock face in the immediate future.

cal en gineering h o n o r society. F ra n k S annella coached track & field and cross country for 29 years at W PI from 1945 to 1975. He took over from J. O liver Johnston, but had been affiliated w ith WPI tract meets since 1930 when he was a starter for some of the most historic dual and intercollegiate meets on Alumni Field. During his coaching tenure he coached some of the greatest track men in W PI’s history. Ed Lemieux, Dick Zeleny, Don Jordan, George Howe, A1 Deloid and Harvey Howell were some o f the athletes w ho had set school records under Sannell’s tutelage. He w as an educator who had the ability to get the most out o f people. He taught his athletes valuable lessons about life and w as considered a unique coach and “special person,” as rem em bered by fellow Hall o f Fam er Andy M urch. A native o f W o rcester, M A , S an ella a t­ tended B ates C o lleg e w here he w as a m em ­ ber o f the track and cross country team s. In credibly, he co m p eted in every d istan ce from the qu arter to the longer distan ces. He began his co ach in g c areer w hile still in high school. A t B ates h is senior year he to o k up coaching w hen he w as u nable to run. He jo in ed to co achin g sta ff at W PI in 1945 w hile also serving as the prin cip al o f O xford H igh School. H e died in 1981. P hil G re b in a r o f Holden, MA. has had un­ paralleled success in his 23 years as the head w restling coach at W PI which began in 1972. He has compiled a lifetime 300-79-4 record, with an unbelievable .791 w inning percentage. He reached the 300 win plateau in the final meet of 1994, as he led W PI to the New England C ollege C onference W restling A ssociation cham pionship for the third time in school his­ tory. With this accom plishm ent he w as named the NECCW A “Coach of the Y ear” for 1994 for the third time, with the two previous occassions being in 1985 and 1987. Comm itted to his student-athletes, G rebinar has coached 146 AllNew England wrestlers, and has sent 36 grapplers to compete in the NCAA Division III national tournament. G rebinar attended the State University o f New York at C ortland where he earned a bach­ elor o f science degree in 1971 and a m aster’s in 1972. He is an associate professor in the D epart­ ment of Physical Education and Athletics.

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SPORTS

Students Keep Soccer Alive It seem s th a t so ccer is a very im portant part o f stu d en t life at W PI. O v er fo rty -fiv e students sig n ed up for the new ly fo rm ed S o ccer C lu b , on W e d n esd ay , A ugust 24, 1994. T his clu b w as form ed by the m em bers o f the 1993 W PI JV S occer T eam when an ill advised ad m in istratio n d ro p p ed all JV sp o rts, at W PI. On th is day sixty can d id ates c o m ­ p etin g for ap p ro x im ately th irty spots on the M e n ’s V arsity S occer T eam p racticed from 7:30 - 9 :30am , 3 :00-5:00pm and again from 7 :0 0-9:00pm . A t 8:30pm , th e W om en’s S o c ­ cer C lub m et for th eir first practice. T h e re are thirty m em bers o f this c lu b that has been in existen ce since a p p ro x im ately 1985. T he club has been w aitin g for o v e r a year now to find out if they w ill be elev ated to v arsity status. A th letic C ouncil voted in favor, but funding has not been found. D ue to their clu b statu s, they w ill be p lay in g only six g am es this season: T h u rsd ay , S ep tem b er 8th vs. A ssum ption @ W PI - 8 :30; Saturday, S e p ­ tem ber 17th @ C oast G uard; T hursday, S e p ­ tem ber 22nd vs. N ichols @ W PI - 7 pm ; T uesd ay , S ep tem b er 22, vs. M t. H olyoke @ W PI - 7pm ; S aturday O c to b er 1st. vs. B oston U niversity @ W PI - 11am ; and T u esd ay , O ctober 4th @ R egis C o lleg e. A ssum ption is a Div. II V arsity program using this g am e as a scrim m age. N ichols, M t. H olyoke, and R egis are D iv. Ill V arsities still w illin g to play us for an o th er year. C o ast G uard is a Div. Ill club program seek in g to go v arsity . B oston U niv ersity is a D iv. I club pro g ram .

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Students and advisors who feel they have completed outstanding Interactive Qualifying Projects should submit their project for the PRESIDENT’S IQP AWARDS COMPETITION.

Deadline for submission of applications for the 1994 President's IQP Awards Competition is October3,1994. Applications are available from Betty Jolie in the Project Center. Final judging is December 7. 1994 in Higgins House. P j;

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831-S345 D e li & P ix x e r la Calzone

Gompei’s Homemade Pizza Whole Pies 9” Cheese......................................................................... 3.25 One Topping.............................................................. 3.75 Two Toppings........................................................... 4.25 Three Toppings......................................................... 4.75 WPI Special............................................................... 5.50 Extra Topping................................................................ 50

16" 5.75 6.50 7.50 8.50 9.75 1.00

Choose from the following toppings: Pepperoni, Sausage, Ham, Hanburger, Bacon, Onions, Peppers, Mushrooms, Pineapple, Olives

By the Slice Cheese.....................................................................................1.00 Pepperoni...............................................................................1.25 Daily Special........................................................................ 1.25

Salads 'N' Such Garden Salad........................................................................ 1.75 Spinach Salad....................................................................... 2.95 Antipasto Salad..................................................................... 3.25 Greek Salad............................................................................3.25 Chef Salad.............................................................................. 3.25

Italian Cold C ut.................................................................2.25 Sausage, Onion, Pepper....................................................2.25 Vegetarian...........................................................................1.95 Calzone du Jour.................................................................2.25

New York Style Deli Deli items also available by the pound. All sandwiches served on your choice of bread or rolls, lettuce, tomato, potato chips, and pickle spear.

Roast Beef...........................................................................2.10 Turkey................................................................................. 2.10 Smoked Turkey..................................................................2.10 Baked Ham.........................................................................2.10 Cappacola...........................................................................2.10 Genoa Salami..................................................................... 2.10 Egg Salad............................................................................1.55 Tuna Salad..........................................................................1.85 Chicken Salad.................................................................... 1.85 Seafood Salad.................................................................... 2.10 Cheese Selection American Swiss

Provolone Munster


NEWSPEAK

Page 3

© 1994 Citibank ^ u th

Dakota). N.A.

Wednesday September 7,1994

HOW TO SAVE A FEW BUCKS. (Y O U C A N 'T LIVE O FF P SY C H E X P E R IM E N T S A L O N E .)

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Buy pizza at closing tim e. H a g g l e f o r s l i c e s t h e y ’d o t h e r w i s e j u s t t h r o w

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Eat Ramen noodles.

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M ake friends w ith a Senior. C o m e J u n e , t h e y ’ll b e m o r e t h a n g l a d t o th e i r o ld

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P o ly S c i b o o k s a n d

g iv e y o u

co u ch es.

Donate blood. S a v e a li f e a n d g e t a f r e e

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b o o t.

Pick up a C itibank Classic card. T h e r e 's n o a n n u a l f e e .

Apply for the Citibank Classic card by completing the application in this issue or by calling I - 800 - C ITIB A N K


NEWSPEAK

Page 4

Wednesday September 7,1994

NEWSPEAK HUMOR

CHAOS

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

“So far so good. Now what?”

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

"Hey, look what Roland's doing!"

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

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by Brian Shuster


Wednesday September 7,1994

NEWSPEAK

Page 5

NEWSPEAK HUMOR

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

The eating and drinking parts were fun, but all of them felt a bit awkward about having to be Mary.

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

“How dumb does he think we are? Now, if that were chocolate cake on a string, maybe . .

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

“Well, that answers MY question.”

CHAOS

by Brian Shuster

“I think we must be almost all the way to China by now."


NEWSPEAK

Page 6

Wednesday September 7,1994

COMMENTARY

Philler Blowup Dolls and Sharp Tacks - Closed fo r Remodeling by Laurel and G uinevere We are in the m iddle o f an e n g i­ n eering school. Look around you. D oes this look like a high tech b u ild ­ ing m ecca? L e t’s c o u n t the in co m ­ plete constructio n sites and b roken equipm ent aroun d cam p u s shall w e? O f course we sh all... F irst th in g s m id d le . F reem an P laza. The tra ffic cen ter o f cam pus. C losed. How w as this accom plished? W ell, for one, so m eo n e ripped the hell out o f it. (M aybe it w as one o f th o se trucks that g et lost at night and m istake it for a ro ad .) M ore than likely, it w as those guys w ho w ere probably g etting P A ID to rip it apart. T hey seem to be paid a ton per o unce p er hour. If th ey w ould w ork on p u ttin g a solid su rface dow n rath er th an m oving lo o se s tu f f a ro u n d , m aybe we could g et into som e o f the buildings. A s it is, g ettin g out o f W ashburn becom e s difficu lt if you a r e n ’t c a rry in g a co m p ass. O u r so u rces reveal th at o v er the sum m er, there w ere (on av erag e) three p eople w o rk in g on th e F reem an T re n c h p ro ject. H m m m , w o u ld n ’t it m ake ju s t a liiiiitle bit o f sen se to have a full crew , so th a t it w o uld be done w hen its use w ou ld be greatly a p p re ­ ciated ? G ee, th ese g u y s cou ld have benefited greatly from one o f W P I’s ste lla r M anagem ent courses. If you have n o t no ticed the c o n ­ struction going on at H ig g in s L abs, you obviously (1 ) a re n ’t an M E, (2) have absolutely no clu e, o r (3) are a F reshm an and think H ig g in s is a m odern art scu lp tu re. I f y o u d o h a v e a class in H iggin s, I h ear the b o o k ­ store (pronounced T w o T o w ers T ra i­ to r) is selling hard hats at th eir sta n ­ dard high prices. T h is pro ject, s u r­ p rise, surprise, is also running b e ­ hind schedule. I certain ly w ould not w ant to be one o f those p ro fesso rs stu ck in the tra ile r park out b ack ... T h o se things a ttra c t to rn ad o es, ya k now ... I f you h a v e n o t b e e n in s id e H iggins yet, d o so , b ecau se th is n ex t

part w ill m ake a bit m ore sense if you do. W alk dow n any o f the m ain h allw ays, and notice the strik in g d if­ ference from one side o f the hall to the other. H m m m , w h o ’s in charge of the d eco r around here? The old side, aside from b eing o ld , looked kind o f neat and classy. The new side rem inds me o f a ho sp ital. (D r. Fine, report to em ergency room 5, S T A T .) H m m m , m ay b e it is a M cD L T m o tif that they are going for h ere... A n d la s t but not first, the L ib rary steps. T his co l le c tio n of H appy H eated M a n u ­ a lly - O p e r a te d V ertical People M o v ers, w as stripped o f its d ig n ity , h a v ­ ing to undergo th e h u m ilia ­ tion o f b e a r­ ing its p ip es for all to see. W hat an o u t­ rage! From w hat we h e a r , th e y had the heat up h ig h e r than a h ip ­ p ie at W o o d sto c k , and it m e lte d the m o rtar rig h t o ff the b rick w alls. H onest. Furiously the crew w orked to restore the stru ctu ral integrity o f the w alls, and broke a few o f the step s in the p rocess, e ’est la v ie... (W e d o n ’t know if this is entirely true, but hey...) O nce again it is tim e for [insert fanfare here] a silly list o f things that we n oticed but you probably d id n ’t care about. W hen a tree w as needed for that stran g e c ircu lar area by the front entrance to the quad, the closest thing W PI has to a rotary, som e (gasp)

th in k in g person had to o f p ick ed a B eech tree for one p articu lar reason: it is the school colours. ...M u st have been a fluke. B efore too m uch tim e g o es b y , take a look at the tree, e sp ecially up at the top w here the leaves are still m aroon. T h is, c o m ­ b ined w ith the trunk b ein g grey , m ak e s fo r a re a lly n e a t th in g w h eth er p lan n ed or not... Did ya e v er notice that S alisbury L abs has “ F reshness V en ts,” ju st like the Z iplock B ags? W here is th e A c o u stic s L ab s? T ake a g u ess... No. No. T h a t’s not it eith er. Forget it, you w ill n ev er guess this one, b e ­ cau se it

Did you ev er w onder w hat the E llsw o rth -F u ller apartm ents w ould look like if they burnt dow n? Since they are m o stly cheap w ood and brick, they w ould burn q u ite nicely. B ut on th e next day, they w ould provide the stu d en t body w ith a neat op p o rtu n ity fo r som e fun gam es. I bet th at the p arallel b ric k w alls, w hich should rem ain standing, w ould m ake for an excellent gam e o f d o m i­ noes (read p h y sics experim ent for class cred it). D on't try this... until we g et there w ith the video cam era... ok? O k, w e 'v e ta lk e d e x c e s s iv e ly about th in g s that are broken around here. N ow , this is an engineering school, so we should figure out w ays to fix them . B e­ fore we do th i s , we s h o u ld r e ­ v ie w how o th e r s on cam pus have gone about m a k in g r e ­ pairs. For in ­ s ta n c e , dow n in f r o n t o f F o u n d e rs, we assum e at one tim e o r a n ­ o th e r , o n e o f th e pseu d o ­ stre e t li g h ts sto p p e d w o rk ­ ing. N ow , the logical th in g to do w ould be to fix the light, but that's not w hat hap ­ pened. In ty p ical P lant S ervices style, they engineered a pipe, tra­ v ersing the con crete sid ew alk b ar­ rier, cre a tin g a space-age sky tram for ele c tric ity . In other w ords, in ­ stead o f fin d in g the break in the w ire and fix in g it properly, they M ickey M oused it w ith a 10 pound !ead pipe. N ice, g u y s. V ery nice. A s you co uld probably tell from the nifty neat shiny b lack to p su r­

d o e sn ’t seem to m ake any sen se. A cco rd in g to the sign on the d o o r, it is in the carriag e house o f H ig g in s H ouse. Is th at an y th in g like a g arage band? W here in the w orld, is C arm en S and ieg o © ? D id she steal the p a v e ­ m ent from Freem an P laza? W hat sort o f sin iste r plan could th is be? Is she in cah o o ts w ith som e n ew fangled terro rist o rg an izatio n try in g to u n ­ derm in e o u r education - or at least o u r ab ility to get to c lass to get an ed u cation . W h atev er the reason, w e need to find her...

rounding B oynton and W ashburn, over the sum m er, w hen m ost of us w ere not here, a fair am ount o f pav­ ing w ent on. T h is, on the w hole, w as u n ev en tfu l, ex cep t fo r the fact a lovely gentlem an w ith a backhoe decided to rip through the m ain com ­ m unication cable for the m ajority o f cam pus. No one know s precisely w hy this w as done, but it w as gener­ ally considered to be a poor idea in the long run. T he N Y N EX people loved it, g etting beaucoup overtim e to repair it through h alf the night. G reen w ire goes w ith green, brown w ire goes w ith brow n, red w ire gets cut first, blue w ire goes w ith yel­ low ... H m m m , m aybe that's why my ph o n e rin g s w hen I turn on the show er... A s a result o f this fiasco, the CCC had to m ake som e quick fixes. So quick in fact, that they w ere not even given the tim e to pull a Plant S er­ vices and use co n d u it (the official Plant Services fix -it tool). T hey had to re s o rt to u sin g N a tu re ’s own m ethod of hanging E thernet w ire: they strung it up in the trees and hoped... T his is obviously a true e ngineering solution, and we con­ g ratu late the C C C for a jo b well tho u g h t out, by aw arding them the o fficial P hiller aw ard for the N eatest Fix O f S om ething T hat W as Not Y our Fault In T he First Place aw ard ( N .F .O .S .T .W .N .Y .F .I .T .F .P . aw ard). You know, this is the proper way to write a Philler article: at the last minute, and while listening to TM BG. This might explain a lot of things to you, it certainly does to us. N othing drasti­ cally im portant, mind you, but hey. U h, uh, w hat are w e go in g to fill th is last b it o f space w ith? Any sug g estio n s? No. W e could alw ays keep ram bling on, and on, and on, and I'm sure we could keep this go ­ ing for quite som e tim e if w e really w an ted to, but as our m inds are quickly running o u to f things to w rite about it seem s that w e w ill have to ju s t end this in any old way such as...

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Need some writing help?

Radio waves to become a reality by J e ff Coates Class o f ‘96 You may not have realized it, but over the past two terms a small group o f individuals ( an IQP team actually) has been working hard to make their dream o f an On-Campus Radio Station a real­ ity. Hard to believe? Maybe, but it’s the truth, and now w e need your help. The first organizational meeting will be held F rid ay , Sept 9 a t 6 PM in K innicut H all (Salisbury Labs) and is open to any member of the W PI community who is interested in helping out with the cre­ ation of the station. For all you skeptics out there, I’d just like to point out that two of our largest obstacles have already been overcome. The first of these w as acquiring an oncampus space that was suitable to the needs of a broadcast facility. Thanks to the hard work o f our IQP team, consist­ ing o f Greg Findlen and Josh Single, and myself, Jeff Coates (all Class o f ‘96), The Center For High Performance Com­ puting, Pres. Strauss, CCC director lames Jackson, and many others, we were in­ deed able to locate a suitable space in one of the buildings on campus. Secondly, there was the issue o f fund­ ing. To be honest, at this point we do not have a definite comm itment from any o f the organizations involved, but are con­ fident there is indeed funding coming to us in the near future for the establish­ ment of the station. Lastly, there w as the problem of es­ tablishing a suitable method o f trans­ mission. Unfortunately, the acquisition o f an FCC Broadcast license is beyond

the scope o f our IQP, but it shall be among the first issues addressed by the station’s staff upon the creation o f the organization. In the meantime, our sig­ nal shall be sent to every on-campus resident as part o f the FM Stereo Service which is offered as a part o f the cable system. This service offers all the major stations from surroundingm arkets(Boston, Providence, etc.) as well as our signal without the inherent reception problems faced by most W orcester resi­ dents. Realizing that a sizable percent-

Calculus Tutoring Schedule T erm A Mike Jiro u tek SH104 M on............................... 1 lam - 1pm T ues.-Fri...........10am - 12:00 noon

Jim Naughton KH204 M on.-Thurs.......4:30pm - 6:30pm. Low er Wedge S un.................................. 4pm - 6pm.

M onday.................9-12 & T u e s d a y ............... 9-12 & W e d n e sd a y ....................... T h u rsd ay .............. 9-12 & F riday.................... 9-12 &

12:30-3:30 12:30-3:30 12:30-3:30 12:30-3:30 12:30-3:30

The W riting Resource C enter is located in Salisbury Labs 134. The WRC provides help with any w riting assignment or project to all members of the WPI comm unity. For further information please call De Ann Finkel at ext. 5503 or send e-mail to dcf@ wpi.

u N

Blood drive The WPI Panhellenic Council is sponsoring a Red Cross Blood Drive on T u e sd a y , S e p te m b e r 13, and W ednesday, Septem ber 14, from 10:00 am. until 4:00 p.m.

The W riting Resource C enter hours fo rA T e rm 1994 will be:

age, if not most WPI residents do live off campus, we are working very hard to provide a similar service to off-campus students by A Term of next year. Once again, I urge you to attend the meeting this Friday if you have any questions, or are interested in becoming a part o f this exciting new chapter in the history of WPI.

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The Student Newspaper of Worcester Polytechnic Institute WPI Box 2700, Worcester, Massachusetts 01609 Phone (508) 831-5464 • Fax (508) 831-5721 Editor-In-Chief Vijay Chandra Associate Editor! Eric Craft Troy Thompson Tom Sico Jennx Yambert

Photography Editor

Feature* Editor

Jason Philbrook

Brian Parker

News Editor

Sports Editor

Chris Freeman

Adrew Watts

Business Manager John Grossi

Graphics Editor Kristen Greene

Advertising Manager Dave Koelle

Circulation Manager Lexie Chutoransky

Photography Staff Matt Bonanno Geoff Elliott Joe Ferra Patti Kessler Don Socha

Faculty Advisor

Interim Circulation Manager

Typlet

John Trimbur

Came Couper

Patricia Panlilio

W PI Newspeak of Worcester Polytechnic Institute, formerly the Tech News, has been published weekly during the academic year, except during college vacations, since 1909 Nswspesk has been printed on recycled paper since January, 1991. Masthead designed by Troy Thompson for Newspeak's 21st Anniversary. Letters to the Editor should be typed (double-spaced) are! must contain the typed or printed name of the author as well as the author's signature, telephone number, and box number for verification. Students submitting letters to the editor should put their class after their name. Faculty and staff should indude their full title. Letters deemed libelous or irrelevant to the WPI community will not be published. The editors reserve the right to edit all other copy for correct punctuation and spelling. All copy is due by 5:00 p.m. on the Friday preceding publication. Send them to WPI Box 2700, bring them to the Newspeak office (Riley 01), or send them via email newspeak@wpi.wpi.edu. They must include the author's name and box number. There is a 275 word limit imposed on Club and Greek comer submissions. All ads are due by 5:00 p.m. on the Thursday preceding publication. Any submissions received after this time will be subject to a flat $15 late fee per ad. Advertisements, including classified ads, will not be accepted via email. Classified ads must be prepaid The decision on whether a submission is a public service announcement or an advertisement lies with the editors. The editorial is written by a member or members of the Newspeak staff It does not necessarily reflect the opinions of the entire Newspeak staff. Printing is done by Saltus Press First Class postage paid at Worcester, Massachusetts. Subscription rate is $20 00 per school year, single copies 75 cents within the continental United States. Make all checks payable to W PI Newspeak.


Wednesday September 7,1994

NEWSPEAK

Page 7

I AL MEETING Thursday, September 8 , 1994 6:00 On the Quad take your pick. Newspeak, or D M A ? It's up to you.

No experience needed. Hell, we'll even train you


Page 8

NEWSPEAK

Wednesday September 7,1994

CLUB CORNER

Alpha Phi Omega Hey there, all you OI-sters!! People people people (people w ho need people...like buttah!!) Join all the com m ittees that you want but a word o f advice: if you say your are going to be a part of it, STAY a part o f it. M ake sure you make it to all o f the m eetings and keep in touch with the V P’s / chairmen if you can ’t make it to a meet­ ing... take it from me one o f the w orst offend­ ers... (pot calling the kettle black). It doesn’t help the V P’s much if you say you are going to be there and you are not, they just get more frustrated with you. (sorry respective people) Peoples interested in joining the service com ­ mittee - contact Jeff, baron@ wpi, , SVP, for m em bership - contact C orinne, ckachler@ wpi, MVP, for Spring C onclave ‘95 - contact John, qasam a@ w pi, for fellow ship - contact Marc, icepick@ w pi, FVP, for helping with Alumni Banquet,contact Melissa, melissa@ wpi, Alumni Secretary.(insert your group here if I missed you), and if you have any money feel free to give it to Am y, am y@ wpi, or m ake the check out to me :) T hanks for reading!! YiLFS

“dragon@ w pi.w pi.edu”. It serves as a medium between the m em bers and the officers. Hey, I know we (the officers) aren ’t perfect, so we would like to hear from you about the club.

Christian Bible Fellowship Hi Everyone!! I hope your term is off to a great start. W e have many excting events planned for this term: Tom m orrow night we will have Prayer and Share in M organ A at 7:00 pm. This will be a much needed break during the middle of the week to pray to and praise the Lord. On Friday night w e’ll have a great time of fellow ship, a teaching by Paul C arter, and a time o f singing. Com e on down to Fuller 311 (M aybe) at 7:00 Friday evening. Just a couple o f up and com ing events: Septem ber 17 is an all day Christian Festival in G ranby, MA. Steve Taylor along with a variety of other m usicians will perform throughout the day. Also, on Saturday, Sept. 24 w e’ll be clim bing Mt. M onadnock. More information on these events will be forth­ coming. Hope I hope to see you there.

AIAA

International Student

W elcom e back everyone. A quick recap of what the AIAA is for those o f you w ho d o n ’t know. W e are a professional society m ade up of people interested in (obviously) aeronautics and astronautics. A nyone can join, not just aero majors. Throughout the year we have guest speakers, rocket launches, paper airplane con­ tests, and the occasional roadtrip. O ur first meeting this year will be on W ednes­ day (9/7) in Salibury Labs room 121 at 4:30pm. Those o f you who picked up applications should bring them and your checks for the $5 local and $ 15 national dues. If you d o n ’t have an applica­ tion, they will be available at the meeting. We also have tentatively planned a model rocket launch for Sunday (9/11) on the baseball field. Launch equipm ent and engines will be pro­ vided, but you have to bring your own rockets. T hat’s all, hope to see you at the meeting.

Council

Chinese Student Association H ello everyone! I hope you are all enjoying life at school so far. Oh, but if you are not, d o n ’t worry because C SA is planning a series of exciting events that will surely keep you occu­ pied for a while. So if you w ant to have some fun, stick with us. A quick review o f what the CSA has done so far.... W e had our first G eneral M eeting last Tuesday and about 50 of you showed up. We briefly went through our plans for this year and filled you in on our first events. A fter the meeting, we trooped o ff to a yummy dinner at Peking W ok. W ell, the room they gave us at the restaurant was kinda small for the 45 o f us, but 1 am sure everyone had a lot o f fun and food that night. O k, and now, The First Event of CSA : The W elcom e Party !! It will be held 'T O N IG H T *, Sept 6th, from 7:00 - 1 1 :00 p.m. at Founders Study (in the B asem ent o f Founders Hall). If you d o n ’t know w here it is, d o n ’t worry; ju st go to Founders Hall (w hich is next to Institute Hall) and w e will put up signs to show you the way. We are going to play a lot o f fun games and have refreshm ents there tonight. So hey, let’s all come and party. It is going to be FUN! If you have any questions, opinions, sugges­ tions, com plaints, and basically anything you w ant us to know , e -m a il us at

Hey everybody, ever wanted to be interna­ tional? Meet international students? Check out ISC (International Student Council). It is a collection of students, both international and local who have an interest in bringing together their cultures. Throughout the year, we plan to org an ize m any events. W e ’ll be having barbeques, dances, organized sports, and the like. If you think y o u ’re interested, look for postings o f our events. T here’s a lot to learn about other cultures. Think about this: Did you know that many A sians eat exclu­ sively with their hands? Did you know that Muslims are required to pray 5 tim es a day? Did you know that there’s music beyond Pearl Jam? Did you know that the Indian Film industry is about 10X bigger than Hollyw ood? If you think you can party, try to keep up with the Latin Americans. Did you know that most people in other countries are bilingual? Did you know that some members o f the ISC claim ed to have seen levitation in other parts o f the w orld? So if you happen to be the grungy, religious, messy, monolingual, partying couch potato with an interest in trancendental m editation (or if you happened to be bored W ednesday at 3:30), stop in Morgan C and see what the ISC is all about.

Masque W elcom e to the Masque Club Corner, for those of you w ho might not know we are W PI’s very own theatre troupe. We meet every Friday at 4:30pm in the green room o f Alden Hall, which is located right behind the main stage. You can usually just follow the crow d. M eet­ ings are open to everyone, o f any interest level. As our or w eekly trips to Theos after the m eet­ ing. In other news Chain Link Fence, W P I’s im provisational group, is having open auditions Tues. Sept 6 from 9 -1 1pm, W ed. 8-10pm, and call-backs will be Thurs. night. You need to attend both nights, if you are totally confused, have questions, or need more info, e-m ail dawn@ wpi or call 791-2220 if you are com ­ puter illiterate. Live the Fence! Susan Vick is looking for production staff for M idsummer, which will go up B term, e-m ail her at svick if you are interested, oh - also persons w ho would like to apply as dramaturgs for n-v-1-3- should e-mail svick as well if you want to know what a dram aturg is ask susan that as well. W ell that is

Delivery Person Wanted Monday - Saturday ll:00am-2:00pm / 5:00pm-10:00pm Earn $8-$ 10/hr

all for this week, for more info about masque in general e-m ail trishg or w ildm an.

M en’s Bowling Hello to everyone reading this. Hopefully, you all have been practicing over the summer. W hile the club and team will not start until Bterm, I’d still like to see you down at the bowling lanes (For those o f you w ho are new here and didn’t know we had bow ling lanes, they are located in Alumni Gym, behind the pool). The lanes are open W ednesdays from 8-10 pm, and Friday and Saturday nights from 5-11 pm. <Games are $.90, shoes are $.35 — socks are required.> Also, for anyone interested, there may still be space available for the A -term student bowling league. See Coach Lussier at the bow ling lanes W ednesday between 5:30 and 6:00 pm for info. If any of you think y o u ’d be interested in bowling B-term, either in the club or on the travel team (this includes all o f you who bowled last year), please e-mail me at zeldaag@ wpi.edu or drop me a letter at W PI box 1496. Please include name, e-mail address and box number. More info will be posted later. See you at the lanes!

Muslim Student Association Assalm-U-alaikum Brothers and Sisters. W elcome back! We w ould like to take this opportunity to welcome all of our new brothers and sisters to WPI cam pus. From now on we will be h a v in g o u r C L U B C O R N E R in the NEW SPEAK every week so if any o f you want to have som ething there, email sash@ wpi by Thursday evening. All o f your questions and comm ents about the club and it’s activities will be appreciated. So please let us know. If there is any muslim student on cam pus that we d o n ’t know o f and would like to join us in our weekly prayer meetings please let one o f the officers know and we will put you in our mailing list. We will let you know about our first general meet­ ing via cam pus mail and em ail. So keep check­ ing your mail! The new M SA executive com ­ m ittee is: P R E S ID E N T : B A C H A R ELKHATIB (bkhatib@ wpi) VICE PRESIDENT:

SA BRIN A SH AM SU DD IN (sash@ w pi) SEC­ RETARY: SA M EER JUNAID (sameer@ wpi) S O C IA L EVENTS C O O R D IN A T O R : M OHA M M ED D EM BLE (m oh@ w pi)T R E A ­ SURER: SA H A L LAHER (sahal@ w pi) Good luck with your classes and hope to see you all in the general m eeting!

The Newman Club W elcom e back everyone and a special hello to the Class of ’98! Newman is W P I’s Catholic social club deter­ mined to encourage campus spirit. The execu­ tive board m et last week for our first meeting/ cookout of the y ear to plan for the year. Some im portant upcom ing events: Our first dinner and movie party will be Friday at 5:30pm at the C enter on Schussler St. A lso, in conjunction with Homecoming we will be having an afternoon picnic on Sunday the 1 1th. (Certain backyard chefs we know are already preparing) Stop by when you can! Our next m eeting is at 9pm on Monday at the Center. There w ill be an ice cream social beforehand at 8:30pm . Everyone is welcome!

Society of Women Engineers Hello returning members. W elcom e all new students. SW E w ill be having it’s first meeting o f the school year on W ednesday, Sept. 7 at 7pm in Salisbury Labs 123. We w elcom e any new students interested in joining SW E or seeing what we are all about. We will be discussing some of the activities of the upcom ing year so plan to be there! Quote for the week: Some­ times love can reach where w ords can’t touch.

Womens Crew W elcome back to the old team and hello to the new freshm an. Once again we are back for another aw esom e season. Practice started on August 29th and I am very happy to have seen so many fam iliar faces and more new ones. This w eek we will go on the water and freshman you will see why we have all continued to get up at the crack o f daw n. There is no sport like rowing. Get psyched, our first race is the Head o f the Textiles on O ctober 2nd in Lowell. If you are interested in rowing and want to do so, e-mail w hite@ w pi. W e’d love to have you!

Student P arking Decals w ill be given out on

September 6, 7, and 8 from

9:00am-Noon and l:00pm-4:00pm at WPI Campus Police

Must have own car Apply to:

Boomer’s Sub & Deli 93 Highland St Worcester, MA 01609 791-5551

$10.00 fee cash or check No deposits


Page 9

NEWSPEAK

Wednesday September 7,1994

GREEK CORNER A TA H ello Ladies! I hope you all had a lovely L ab o r D ay ...R em em b e r: N o M ore W h ite Shoes!! H ere’s another helpful hint: W hen the question is “Sex”, and the choices are “M ” and “ F”, the “ M ” usually stands for M ale, not M onika. I t’s pretty tricky. C ongratulations to C arla for finishing your M OP, but w e’ll miss your soft, subtle, quiet sense o f humor! C ongrats also to the new officers: H eather M .(Social) and Shannon H. (C ourtesy N otes)...and Tanya: Good Luck fig­ uring out w hat Public R elations is all about! H ugs go out to KP and Jenn H. W e hope the little cham eleon can alw ays catch his flies....w e love you! Special hellos to Fiona (just be­ cause), and to Nutty and Banana Bread (from Fruity). The Sisterhood Brunch is com ing up and should be great...if only we knew the nam e of the restaurant..or where it is...Any other b ril­ liant ideas, T opless??....A D OV ELIN G

AXP H ello, again, and w elcom e... “ A sk, and ye shall receive;” I asked you guys to do som e­ thing dum b last w eek, and one brave soul quickly stepped forward and took one for the team . For those of you w ho were quick to forget the hilarious (or better yet, for the non­ brother reading population, who equally d e­ serve a good laugh at one o f our b ro th er’s expense), let me re-create T rico m i’s now fa­ m ous phone call: “ Hello, A lpha Chi R ho...” “Hey, M att, this is Jose, I need you to ...” “Jose? Hold on, I ’ll see if h e’s here... “ W ait!!! You stupid @ % */'&$%!M” W ell, you get the idea. U nfortunately for Jose, the hundred o r so

w eek o f classes unscathed! D on’t forget about th e s i s te r r e tr e a t th a t is c o m in g up soon...Septem ber 11 to be exact. Happy birthday goes out to Kim Scofield (yesterday), Cindy M itchell (the 8th), and Patti Hill (the 11th). Good luck to the w om ens soccer team , ten ­ nis team , field hockey team, and volleyball team . K eep up the hard w ork...w e’ll all be there to cheer everyone on! In the personals this week: -ELVIS IS A LIV E and K ICKING in Falm outh...and for anyone w ho d o e sn ’t believe it just go ask Joh. Hey Jo h ...isn ’t salt w ater harmful to the rhinestones on his sw im suit? -Sarah Mac: Q: How do you get an am oeba to do som ething that it d o esn ’t w ant to do? A: Hold it at gun point. -Sarah T egan.....enough said. -Erika Sim pson found out first hand last w eek that the toaster oven has a tendency to flam be toast S pecial hellos go out to L iela, D ianna C arlson, Kelly King (thanks for alw ays cook­ ing for m e), Tricia Pignone, Becky Kiluk, and M andy. GO G REEK!!! LITP

people w ithin ear-shot o f him at the Shaw ’s payphone he w as calling from was not im­ pressed w ith his im pressive know ledge of dirty w ords... O ther brief stories... Even though baseball’s over, we still m anaged to have a “T riple C row n” w inner last w eek; congratulations, JOE, and keep doing w hatever it w as you did to achieve such a coveted honor. A lso, our apologies to Sandra, the cook: W e A LL w anted to give you that raise you w anted, but Tom personally said that you d id n ’t deserve one, so we d id n ’t. D irect any and all com plaints to Tom Forcier, 8 Boynton St., W orcester, MA 01609. Thank you. Finally, our first party o f the year w as a huge success; w ell, until Rob Jack so n ’s DJ shift started, anyway. T w o m ore w eeks ‘til RUSH ...

AXA Hey everybody its here. The first Corner of the year and I assure you its the best one I ’ve w ritten since May. Hope everybody enjoyed their sum m ers. W hile I ’m at it I hope everyone enjoyed labor day. I am proud to report that all o f our IM team s w ent undefeated last week. K eep up the good w ork guys. M aking a live appearance this w eek fresh back from med school this w eek is Jeff Richm an aka Dr. Beerm an. Thats all for now I ’m sure if I left anything out y o u ’ll all let me know. BUHBYE!

TKE W hat’s up, h ow ’s the new year? Intram urals start next week. We finished second last year in the quest for the cup, only one more spot to clim b this year. It w ill be so much fun to pond the A thletics chairm an w hen w e win it this year. The Endless Sum m er gathering w ent w ell even though the tem perature outside w as in the 4 0 ’s. Strange how the school bus seem s to have disappeared with the graduation o f its driver. Rush w ill be starting soon so help C hecca

0 )2 2 Hey Phi Sigs Sigs! I hope everyone made it through the first

The TI-85 builds on the functionality of the TI-68 and adds a wide range of graphing capabilities. So math students can handle calculus problems more easily. And technical stu­ dents can see the functions for a better understanding of problems. The TI-85 also handles complex numbers, matrices, vectors, lists and strings. Plus it offers a powerful one-equation SOLVER.

out as much as possible. C ongratulations to Sean O ’Shea on his election as Hypophetes. Now if he w ill only buy him self a car we will be all set. T h in g s to ponder for the new school year. -W ill E m ilio stop saying that annoying phrase he is alw ays saying. -W ill Jerem y take that hat off again -W ill Popeye return from the grave -W ill C ricket be televised on N ational tele­ vision -W ill M ez ever win another gam e o f NHL hockey -W ill I pass more classes than Phil -W ill I stop asking these m onotonous ques­ tions L astly I ’d like to say hi to all the froshmen w ho chose such a fine center o f academ ia. C an ’t believe I just said that. Hello to all those at 66 Fruit Loop Street, ju st because I said I w ould. A nyw ay, see ya next w eek. -The Mayor Lives, Falabam bin

0X BW G W N B ...H ave you ever gotten the feel­ ing that y o u ’re forgetting to do som ething? well I w as ju st about to do som ething enjoyable w hen I rem em bered this thing so if you have any com plaints (in the im m ortal w ords of R ichards) “G FY ”-edited. W ell w e’ve been back aw hile and consequentely there are a plethora o f stories and people to m ake fun of... well actually there aren’t because no one ever does anything cool. A nyw ay, I ’ll do my best: T op­ ping the headlines this w eek B aker made a surprise bid to have toilets installed in every room , but refuses to com m ent on w hy, Pluta w as sp o tted in W isconsin h eading south, Lom bard announced this w eek that he decided to sponsor a casino trip to Las V egas sponsored entirely by house money, sadly only tw o people, Judd and G riffiths, signed up, LeC lair took a giant step backw ards in the evolution of man and has now reverted to playing w ith dirt, and finally Buddy can now lay dow n and bark on com m and (th at’s exactly how desperate for materia] I am), now if we could only get Downey to do that. I ’m outta riddles, but I ’ll w ork on it. W ell th e tim e has com e, and so having redesposed o f the article, exit our hero stage left!

The TI-68 solves up to five simultane­ ous equations. Has complex number functions. Offers formula program­ ming. Even has a last equation replay feature. All at a great price.

P ass along AN HEIRLOOM MORE VALUABLE THAN GOLD. L if e .

When you make a be­ quest to the American H eart Association, you’re passing along a precious legacy. The gift of life. T hat’s because your contri­ bution supports research th a t could save your de­ scendants from America’s num ber one killer.

Get Serious. Engineering, math or science major? Serious stuff. Get a TI-68 Advanced Scientific or TI-85 Graphing Calculator from Texas Instruments. They’re designed for students and professionals and recommended by professors. Get the serious functionality you demand at a price you can afford. Try a TI-68 or TI-85 at your local TI retailer today, or for more informa­

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tion, call 1-800-TI-CARES.

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American Heart Association

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This space provided as a public service 1992. American Heart Association

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Texas In s t r u m e n t s e-mail: ti-cares ® lobby.ti.com

In C anada, call I 800 661-2007

©1994TI IH000182


NEWSPEAK

Page 10

Wednesday September 7,1994

Uisit WPI Bookstore’s Expanded Software Department Office Professional 4.3 $189.95 Borland C++ 4.0 Windows $129.95 Borland C++ 4.B CO $99.95 Ulord 6.0 $99.95 Maple II Student Edition rel. 2 $90.95 M athem atica Student Edition $109.95 MathCad 5.0 $89. Fortran Pouierstation $ 109.95 S to r e S p e c ia l!

mm

RutoCad 12 Complete $479 Prepaid (plus $15 shipping) Must be ordered by September 23, 1994 Mid-October Deliuery

E S E R V E

O F F I C E R S '

T R A I N I N G

GET A B A

OR B.S. ON U-S. A college education takes $$$. Don’t send out an SOS. U 2 can get the $$$ you need with a merit-based Army ROTC Scholarship. 1,000’s of scholarships are awarded every year

to students majoring in engi­ neering, scie n c e, business, nursing and a number of other majors. B 1 of them. Army ROTC s c h o l a r s h i p s are A+. They’re as good as Au.

ARMY ROTC

Try RutoCad! Rel. 18 Student Edition only $69.95

Come in for a FREE catalog! Most items can be special ordered Daniels Hall Monday to Thursday 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Friday 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. 831-5247

Researching the IQP and MQP “Hands-on ” Library Instruction Sessions

WHEN:

THE SMARTEST COLLEGE COURSEYOU CAN TAKE.

TUESDAY, SEPT. 6 ,1994 WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 7, 1994 THURSDAY, SEPT. 8,1994 FRIDAY, SEPT. 9,1994

FOR MORE INFORMATION: CONTACT CAPTAIN CRAIG AMNOTT AT (508) 752-7209 OR 831 -5268 OR STOP BY HA 28

WHERE: GORDON LIBRARY AUDIO VISUAL ROOM

$35,000 SCH OLARSH IPS: TH E FAST TRACK T O SUCCESS. TIMES: Two-vear N RO T C scholarships offer lu m o n a n d o th e r financial assistance w orth as m uch as S35.000 to qualified college sophom ores. T he N aw pavs to r tu iu o n . textbooks, in stru cu o n ai fees a n d gives vou an allow ance of S100 a m o n th fo r up to 20 m o n th s d u rin g vour last two vears of college. U pon g ra d u a tio n an d co m p leu o n o f re q u ire ­ m ents. vou'U b e c o m e an im p o rtan t part of th e Navy a d v en tu re as a N aw officer F o r m ore in form atio n contact LT Leo F. T a y lo r, Naval ROTC, C ollege of the Holy C ross at 7 9 3 -3 3 8 7 .

\T ATTV D H T f You and LheNavyIN r lV I i \ v j 1 V j F u ll S p e e d A h e a d .

11 A.M. -1 2 Noon

Space is limited to the first 16-20 people each day!! Sign up at the reference desk to reserve a spot.


Page 11

NEWSPEAK

Wednesday September 7,1994

CLASSIFIEDS Newspeak will run classifieds free for all WPI students, faculty, and staff Free classifieds are limited to six (6) lines. Ads of a commercial nature and ads longer than six lines must be paid for at the off campus/commercial rate of $5.00 for the first six lines and 50 cents per additional line. Classified ads must be paid for in advance. No information which, in the opinion of the Newspeak editors, would identify an individual to the community will be printed in a personal ad. The editors reserve the right to refuse any ad deemed to be in bad taste or many ads from one group or individual on one subject. The deadline for ads is noon on the Friday before publication. All classified ads must be on individual sheets of paper and must be accompanied by the writer's name, address and phone number.

W h a t the hell are those idiots doing with m y social fee? T he W PI S ocial Com m ittee (otherw ise know n as SocC om m ) is the m ajor program m ing board on cam pus and is responsible for providing the WPI C om m unity w ith a variety o f educational, social, cultural and entertaining events throug h o u t the year. W e are the largest student organization on cam pus an d are com pletly student run. W e are funded entirely by the social fees paid by all undergraduate students.

Name ____________________________

Phone _______________

Address__________________________

Total Enclosed $ _______

Allow only 30 characters per line

W e are d iv id ed into seven d ifferent com m ittees w hich program different types o f show s and events.

• • • • • • •

Coffeehouse- comedy and acoustic music Pub - bands your parents won't like ffizyor Events - big concerts and shows Special Event's - anything we think is cool Films - sorta sell explanatory Fine ffrts - Very Tunhy cultural stuf! Publicity - spreadin the good word

I____________________________________________________________________________________ I

f To learn m ore about w hat we do and for inform ation on our activities or program m ing schedules com e to the G eneral A ssem bly meeting: (If you can 't m ake it, stop by o u r office or em ail us for more inform ation on how to b ecom e involved)

FUNDRAISING: Choose from 3 different fundraisers lasting either 3 or 7 days. No Invest­ ment. Earn $$$ for your group plus personal cash nouses for yourself. Call 1-800-932-0528, ext. 65. Pillow fight!!!!!

W e d n e sd a y S e p te m b e r 4

7th

:3 0 p m - S L 1 0 4 Worcester Polytechnic Institute Social Committee Worcester, MA 0 1 6 0 9 TEL. (5 0 8 ) 8 3 1 - 5 5 0 9 FAX. (5 0 8 ) 8 3 1 - 5 5 0 9 Internet: soccomm@wpi.wpi.edu

Major Events - Special Events - Fine Arts - Coffeehouse - Pub - Films - Publicity

Part-time opportunity: W arehouse, 3-6 pm. Monday thru Friday; $8/hr. Contact Dave at Butler-Deardon Paper, 25 Park Ave., W orces­ ter, 01609.

Come to o u r ... A partm ent for Rent: Near W PI, 3 Bedroom, applianced, full tile bath, full kitchen, living room, dining room, sun room, 2nd floor, secure building. $825/mo. Call 793-2943 To W hom it may concern: Gimpy is taking Baby-Bio next term

...pizza party all you FRESHMAN... W CHC 88.1 Radio D J’s W anted General Info Meeting Wed. Sept. 7th. at 7pm at Holy Cross. Applications available in the Hogan Cam­ pus Center, due Sept 9th. Wore, only alt. source! M iss you Bean!! FREE ROOM: T o live with quadriplegic, on ventilator, between the hours of 11 pm and 7 am. C all Mr. D. D onaldson at 799-8435 (Allow multiple rings).

...interested in joining NEWSPEAK. Hi to Kyle- the little rascal, Ben - w ith the glasses, Ray - with the hats and part-time glasses, John - who I hardly ever see, Pat- who bought my econ books, and T im -ju st Tim.

A is for Apples, J is for Jacks!

B is for da Berries

Is Financial Aid really in that safe?

Thursday Night, 6:00 pm, on the Quad

(D

CD J +3 1 T 3 Td CD 0) Cj CD O M £ > > • CD H £ CQ 3

OH MY GOD!!! There are blueberries in the blueberry muffins!!!!!

CD > d o o


Page 12

NEWSPEAK

Wednesday September 7,1994

W ed n esd ay , S e p te m b e r 7, 1994 Film: The Piano 1 1:00am - “ Researching the IQP & M OP” Gordon Library, Audiovisual Room. 4:30pm - SocComm organizational meeting, SL104 7:00pm -8:30pm - C D C Resume W riting W orkshop, Perreault Hall 8:00pm - Film: “ In the Name of the Father” Kimball Theater, Holy Cross, $1.50 T h u rs d a y , S e p tem b er 8, 1994 11:00am - “ Researching the IQP & M Q P” Gordon Library, Audiovisual Room. 6:00pm - Newspeak Special M eeting, the Quad. 7:00pm - W omen's Volleyball vs Sim m ons

O N THE Q U A ®

F rid a y , S e p te m b er 9, 1994: 1 1:00am - “ Researching the IQP & M QP” Gordon Library, Audiovisual Room. 6 :00pm -l 1:00pm - Sterling Fair: (H oughton School on Boutelle Rd.) 6:00pm - Campus R adio Informational M eeting, K innicutt Hall (SL 115)

F e a t u r in g :

P y i Sta to ® ini

S a tu rd a y , S e p tem b er 10,1994 12:00pm - W omen's Tennis at W heaton 1:00pm - City Soccer Tournam ent at WPI (W PI, W orcester State, Assum ption, C lark) 1:00pm - Reggae on the Quad featuring Dub Station, RD Riddim, and Stick Figure Stanley 1:30pm - Football at Ursinus 7:00pm - Film: “Backbeat”, Kimball Theater, Holy Cross, $1.50

T O IRoppbm

S u n d a y , S ep te m b er 11,1994 6:30pm , 9:30pm - Film: “Blank C heck” Perreault Hall $2

Stock F d&ure St a n l e y

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M o n d ay , S ep tem b er 12, 1994 3:30pm - Field Hockey at Assum ption

W elcom es W P I students Regular Haircuts

R il e t C o m m o n s )

By Appt. or W alk-in H ours: M on-Sat 7 :30 - 5:30

$8.00 324 G rove St., W ore. (N ext to Percy's) T el: 752-5510

* Monday Specials *

Homecoming ’94 Miniature Golf Design Competition Saturday, September 27, 1994 Group. Represenative. Phone #-------WPI Box

______Yes, we would like to participate in this year's ocmpetition.

PLEASE RETURN ALONG WITH YOUR $5.00 ENTRY FEE, BY 5:00 P.M., TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 13,1994 TO: Student Alumni Society Box in the Student Activities Office located in Daniels Hall i .

j


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