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P h illie s e n d o r s e s r ig h t to k e e p a n d b e a r a r m s Courtesy o f Citizens fo r Phillies George Phillies, Libertarian Party candidate for the U.S. Senate in Massa­ chusetts, recently endorsed the Bartlett/ Stockman Assault Weapon Ban Re­ peal Act. The resolution has passed the House, and now awaits the Senate ac­ tion. Phillies promised: “ I hope that the Senate will pass this bill before I am elected. I promise to support equiva­ lent legislation next year, should it be needed. My opponent. Senator Kerry, is once again on the wrong side on this issue.”

On the same Iine, Ph i11ies condem ned Massachusetts bill H5850, the state counterpart to the Federal assault weap­ ons law. “H5850 is bad for freedom and bad for the people o f Massachu­ setts. The Bill doesn’t even deliver what it promises to its supporters. For each banned assault weapon, a stilllegal weapon that fires the same am­ munition with the same accuracy will remain available. If Governor Weld were of libertarian inclinations - he isn’t - he'd be working to defeat this

the vote in a contested 3-party race. In Crime Control bill is really the Clinton bill.

1994, a Massachusetts Libertarian run­ Victim Disarmament bill, taking guns Phillies discussed the Libertarian ning for statewide office received 3% away from law-abiding Americans, view on firearms ownership and gun o f the vole, more than the difference while leaving them in the hands o f control: “The Libertarian Party is the between Kerry and Weld in a recent America’s burglars, rapists, and hired only party that consistently supports poll. killers.” the Second Amendment. Some Re­ George Phillies was born July 23, The Libertarian Party is one o f Mas­ publican say they support the Second 1947 in Buffalo, New York, Amendment, but the Clinton first son o f Eustace G. Phillies, Crim e control bill on ly M.D. (deceased) and Clara passed because it received "T he C onstitutional pu rp o se o f firea rm o w n ­ Phillies. Phillies grew up in Republican votes.” ership is to allow A m ericans to p ro tect th em ­ Kenmore and Williamsville, “The Libertarian Party selves, a n d to pro tect th eir fa m ilies, th eir co m ­ New York, finished as salutaopposes all taxes, bans, and m unities, their country, an d th eir free d o m s." torian at the W illiam sville restrictions on ownership o f -P rofessor G eorge P hillies Central High School (now guns and ammunition. We Williamsville South) and went oppose firearm registration. to MIT in Cambridge, Massa­ All toooften, registration has chusetts. While at MIT, Phillieseamed sachusetts’ three legally-recognized been the precursor to confiscation. The degrees o f Bachelor of Science in phys­ major political parties. Libertarians Constitutional purpose o f firearm ow n­ ics and life sciences, as well as Master stand in the dynamic center o f the po­ ership is to allow Americans to protect o f Science and (in 1973) Doctor of litical spectrum: pro-freedom on social themselves, and to protect their fami­ Science degrees in physics. Phillies issues, conservative on fiscal issues. lies, their communities, their country, then joined the Harvard-MIT Health Libertarian candidates gain ballot ac­ and their freedoms. Firearms also pro­ Sciences and Technology program as a cess under precisely the same laws that vide enjoyment for millions o f Ameri­ researcher. give ballot access to Democratic and cans who hunt or participate in target In 1971, Phillies joined the United Republican candidates. In 1992, Lib­ shooting events.”

States Army Reserves, eventually ris­ ertarian State Representative candidate “Gun ownership is part o f a solu­ ing to the rank of Specialist, 5th Class, Stephen Epstein gained over 10% o f tion, not part o f the problem. Clinton’s

in a Boston unit, the 338th Medical Detachment; he received an honorable discharge in 1977. In 1975, Phillies moved to California, working as a postdoctoral fellow in the UCLA Chem­ istry department and living in Santa Monica. Phillies in 1978 moved to Ann Arbor, Michigan, where he was employed as an Assistant Professor o f Chemistry at the University o f Michi­ gan. In 1985, after declining alterna­ tives at nationally-known schools, Phillies moved to the prestigious Worcester Polytechnic Institute, where he rose to the rank of Professor in the Department o f Physics. Phillies is rec­ ognized internationally for his scien­ tific studies o f light scattering, soaps, and polymer solutions.

Phillies, 48, never married, rents a townhouse in Worcester, Massachu­ setts, a block from the WPI Campus.

Phillies has participated actively in Libertarian Party organizing efforts in Central and Western Massachusetts.

In 1996, he was elected Executive Di­ rector o f the Massachusetts Libertarian Association.

The History and Traditions of WPI: The culmination of a series

by Donna Emma Edzards Associate Editor Having completed the ten part se­ ries on WPI history and tradition, here is the questionnaire for the contest as promised. There are no rules other than only one entry per person and only one person per entry, (unless, o f course, you agree to split the prize).

As with any contest, any staff member o f the organization sponsoring the event, in this case, Newspeak, is not qualified to win. First prize is a D om ino’s pizza, second prize is a Gom pei’s, and anyone else entering who gets all ten questions and the BONUS question correct will get a neat-o certificate o f historical WPI

2) Name three Freshman/Sopho­ more Rivalry Events, past or present.

3) W ho form erally resided in Alden’s Bell Tower?

4) Complete the following: E to the X, D - Y, D - x, E to the X, D - X. C o sin e , S e c a n t, T an gen t, S in e , 3 .1 4 1 5 9 , E - I, Radical, P i,. . ..

5) What event was held annually in honor o f the author o f a certain D iff E Q’s book?

What is the name o f the m u sical group that played 1) Who is the author o f Two Tow­ there?

6) In what year. ers: The Story of Worcester Techl knowledge. Answers should be brief, generally one to five words, and sub­ mitted on an index card with your name, phone number, box number, and class year or department. Entries must be dropped o f at the Newspeak office, downstairs in Riley Hall by 5pm on Friday, April 5th. Please mark them to my attention! Winners will be announced in the next issue of Newspeak.

One last bit of information, or rather an announcement, before the questionnaire, there will be a Traditions Eve Talk at Higgins House following the Candle Walk on Monday, April 15th. Now for the questions. Good luck!

did women first become students at WPI? 7) Who put on the skits at the origi­ nal Tech Carnivals?

8) Where was the mess hall located during the “War years?”

9) What is the main focus o f re­

search at Alden Research Labs?

10) When did Tech News occupy the old Magentic Laboratory?

BONUS: How many people can be seated (in the permanently provided chairs) in Perreault Lecture Hall?

Spring has come to WPI

WPI continuing education programs expand to Waltham Beginning in September, WPI will offer graduate certificate programs in technology marketing, manage­ ment o f technology, computer and com m unications networks, and soft­ ware engineering and interface d e­ sign at a new campus near Route 128 in W altham , M ass. C on tin u in g Education’s highly successful UNIX System / C Programming Certificate Program, now in its second year in W estborough, w ill also be available

in Waltham.

The WPI Cabinet approved the pro­ posal for the expansion in February.

“We knew that there was a market for these programs in the area from a mar­ keting study completed by the College Board’s Office of Adult Learning and from our own careful investigation of the market for adult learners” says Continuing Education Director Arlene Lowenstein. “We also plan to bring our professional development sem i­

nars and other pro­ grams that we cur­ rently conduct at companies to our new Waltham fa­ cility.”

NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTO / STEVE BROCKWAY For more in ­ WPI baseball had its first home game on the 25th, ending up with a win over the fo rm a tio n , c a ll Lancers of Worcester State, 12-6. See page three for highlights of the game.______ Lisa Jernberg, d i­ rector o f gradu­ ate marketing and enrollment, at ext.

5561.

The entire crew o f the Second United tional Partnerships for the 21st CenS tates M icrogravity L aboratory tury.

(U SM L -2) w ill be on campus on Members of the WPI community Wednesday, April 10, as WPI hosts a will soon receive invitations to a pre­ major event devoted to discussing the sentation in Harrington Auditorium at ard Sardell o f Berlin, Mass., from critical relationship between education, 11:30am, when the crew, including Tahanto R egional High School in particularly education in the sciences chemical engineering Professor and Boylston, Mass.; and Jeffrey Westall, and technology, and the economic fea­ Department Head Albert Sacco, Jr., a son of Mr. and Mrs. Roy Westall o f tures o f the United States. payload specialist aboard the Colum­ Sutton Mass., from St. John’s High Sen. Edward M. Kennedy will join bia, will share their memories o f living School in Shrewsbury, Mass. the astronauts and a select group of and working aboard the microgravity The students will compete for ap­ leaders from industry, government, and laboratory. Doors open at 11 am. The proximately 6,700 Merit Scholarships, education in a roundtable discussion community is also invited to an infor­ valued at more than $26 million, that that will focus on the theme “Count­ mal question-and-answer session from will be awarded this spring. More than down to Tomorrow, Building Educa9:30 to 10:30am in Alden Memorial.

See Academy, continued on page 2

USML-2 crew on campus April 10

Mass. Academy students merit finalists Four students at the Massachusetts Academy of Mathematics and Science at WPI are finalists in the 1996 National Merit Scholarship Program. The acad­ emy, created by act of the Massachusetts Legislature in 1992, is a public high school for students in grades 11 and 12.

It is a collaborative effort of the com­ monwealth o f Massachusetts, WPI and the high schools o f Massachusetts to identify and nurture the potential o f stu­

dents with exceptional aptitude for math­ ematics and science.

The finalists, all seniors, are: Seth Heidkamp, son of Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence Heidkamp o f Uxbridge, Mass., who comes to the academy from Uxbridge H igh School; Saravanan Krishnamoorthy, son of Mr. and Mrs. Suban Krishnamoorthy o f Shrewsbury, Mass., from Shrewsbury High School; Jason Sardell.sonofMr. and Mrs. Rich­

T a b l e

IceCats ace Aces; Spring sports preview See page 3

o f

N ew s ........................................................................................ 2, 5, 7 Sports ................................................................................................ 3 Arts & Entertainment................................................................... 4 Editorial ........................................................................................... 6 Commentary .................................................................................... 6 CSDC ................................................................................................ 6

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letters to the Editor ...................................................................... 7 Computing ....................................................................................... 7 Focus on ...........................................................................................7 Club C o m e r .................................................................................... 8 Greek C orner ................................................................................. 9 Police L o g ..................................................................................... 12 J

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News beyond the farm A weekly e-mail news summary WORLD EDITION For the week preceding this Saturday, March 30th, 19%, here’s what made the News Beyond the Farm: The balance of power in the United States may have shifted. Both chambers o f Congress passed a linc-item veto bill Mar 28th; the House by a 232177 margin and the Senate by a 6 9 -3 1 margin.

Under the new law, the next president will be able to individual line items on budget bills. If Con­ gress wanted to reverse the President's decision, they would have to bring up a separate bill with the funding and override a veto of that bill. Advocates claim the bill will help end “pork barrel” items in the budget while critics claim it will give the President powers not provided for in the Consti­ tution. Also in legislative news, Congress and the President approved raising the Federal debt limit to $5.5 trillion to avoid default, while a bill to raise the minimum wage could not be brought to a vole Mar 28th. Bills to increase social security spend­ ing. reduce small business regulation, and weaken product liability laws were also passed by Mar 29th as part o f the Contract with America plat­ form.

Tensions are mounting in the disputed terri­ tory of Jammu and Kashmir between India and Pakistan. A mosque al Hazratbal in Indian-held territory was attacked by Hindus Mar 24th, leav­ ing three people dead. A siege ensued until Mar 26th when armed Muslim defenders surrendered to Indian authorities and were released. However, the Indian army proceeded to attack a group they called “Muslim militants" Mar 30th, killing 21.

Spokespeople for separatists in the area described the encounter as “savagery,” while the Indian government claims their troops were attacked first.

The W eek in the Balkans: • Serbia handed over two soldiers who admit to committing war crimes Mar 30th. The two claim to have participated in the killing of

over 1000 men.

They’re Talking About It: A siege in Jordan MT has resulted from the attempted arrest o f a group of separatists known as “Freemen.” Several in the group, which does not recognize the Federal government in any author­ ity position, surrendered late Mar 25th, but the remainder holed up in a style reminiscent o f the Branch Davidians in W acoTX. The Freemen are to be held without bail if they can be apprehended: Ruby Ridge, ID case fugitive R;uidy Weaver o f­ fered to serve as mediator in the standoff Mar 30th.

In Shorts: • Relations between China and Taiwan appear to be thawing rapidly; on Mar 24th, China announced that it wanted high-level talks and direct trade between the two entities.

• Rebels in Burundi offered a cease-fire Mar 25th.

• The Federal Treasury started releasing the new, harder-to- counterfeit $100 bills Mar 25th.

• One o f the principal accusers o f the Clintons in the Whitewater affair, David Hale, was sentenced to 28 months in jail for his miscon­ duct Mar 25th.

• The AFL-CIO endorsed Bill Clinton in the Presidential race Mar 25th, the earliest “big labor” has ever endorsed a candidate.

• Yigal Amir was given a life sentence Mar 26th for killing then-Israeli prime minister Yitzhak Rabin.

• Bob Dole won primaries in California, Ne­ vada, and Washington state Mar 26th, prompt­ ing him to officially declare victory in the race forthe Republican nomination. Pat Buchanan reluctantly conceded Mar 27th, but did not suspend his campaign.

• Israel arrested 370 Palestinians in the West

•

Finally: As grades start to come out for Stanford students, many may wish they attended USC. Investigators are now looking into claims that students received an “A” in a ‘Tutor Training” class after doing no work. Said one student, "I didn’t go lo class until the final exam, and there they handed me a paper with my name on it to turn in for a grade.” Most o f the students in the class were athletes, which may lead to a loss o f the school's Rose Bowl championshipandothersanctions. Perhaps an “A" grade at USC is equivalent to Stanford’s “NC” (No Clue/No Credit)?

Bank Mar 26th.

Scientists started to Hood the Grand Canyon Mar 26th in an attempt to make the sediments along the Colorado River more natural.

An explosion at the Beta Steel plant in Portage IN killed two people Mar 27th.

An Egypt Air flight was hijacked to Libya Mar 27th, where the hijackers surrendered.

President Clinton gave a speech Mar 27th in which he called for each stale to implement new educational standards and test­ ing.

• 70 0 0 Zulus marched in Johannesburg Mar 28th, com ­ plaining of unfair treatment of lnkatha members by the ANC government.

• Russia started a three-front offensive in Chechnya Mar 28th.

• Argenlianian hacker Julio Cesar Ardita was arrested Mar 29th in the first case where a US court granted the right to monitor a person’s action on a computer network for police action.

A 5.7 earthquake near Quito, Ecuador killed 19 Mar 29th.

A fire in a department store in Bogor, Indone­ sia Mar 29th killed at least 77.

Hizbollah claims responsibility for several rockets lauched from southern Lebanon at Israel Mar 30th; no casualties were reported.

The Bangladeshi Parliament was dissolved Mar 30th.

Russia finished paying back wages to govern­ ment employees Mar 30th.

The space shuttle Atlantis nearly had to make an emergency landing Mar 30th after it ap­ peared that the doors could not be opened to assist in cooling. Fortunately, it was only a sensor problem.

Former Senator Edward Muskie (ME) died Mar 27th at the age o f 81.

And that’s what made the News Beyond the Farm. **

Sources this week int ituled All Things Con­ sidered (NPR), the Associated Press newswire, the Bill Gallant Show (KIRO-AM), the Dave Ross Show (KIRO-AM), the KIRO Morning News (KIRO-AM), KNWX radio news, Newsday(BBC/ PRl), Newsdesk (BBC/PRI), the News Hour with Jim Lehrer (PUS), the Reuters newswire, the United Press Intenuitional newswire, and The World(PRI). Compiled by: Lance Gleich, Bellevue WA. News Beyond the Farm is designed to provide a reasonably short summary of a week's events for people who would otherwise have no chance to keep up with current events. It is distrubuted by direct e-mail and is published by the Worcester Polytechnic Institute’s student newspaper, "Newspeak, ” when that institution is in session. It may be distributed, forwarded, or re-posted any­ where. Check “http://www.stanford.edu/~lglitch/ btf/btf.html" on the World Wide Web for back issues and further information. Comments, criti­ cisms, and requests fo r e-mail subscription addi­ tions o r deletions should be e-m ailed to “lance.gleich@leland.stanford.edu. ” Congratu­ lations on keeping up with the world around you!

Mass. Academy

ship Program. About 75 percent o f these scholar­ ships are supported by about 600 independent organizations and institutions that sponsor from one to more than 100 awards in a given year’s competition; the remaining awards are underwrit­ ten by the NMSC.

Continued from page I

Campus Hearing Board

by Jennifer Reese Cluiir, SGA Elections Committee The Undergraduate Student Government A ssociation is pleased lo announce the start o f the Campus Hearing Board election pe­ riod. There are two student representatives and three student alternate positions, along with one faculty representative position up for election.

To be eligible for one o f the above student positions, students must meet the following cri­ teria: he or she must be currently enrolled at WPI, not a second semester senior, and in good academic standing as determined by Institute regulations. Anyone who meets this criteria and is interested in serving on the Campus Hearing

Board is encouraged to stop by the SGA office and pick up a nomination petition. All petitions must be returned to the SGA office by 5:00pm on Friday, April 5.

Electronic voting on the College Computer Center Unix system will take place from Thurs­ day, April II through Sunday, April 14. Paper ballot voting will be held in the lobby o f Daniel's Hall on Monday, April 15 from 9am-5:00pm.

The Student Government Association would like lo encourage all undergraduate students to vote in this upcoming election.

If there are any questions aboul the elections, or would like more information, please contact the Undergraduate Student Government Asso­ ciation at 831 -5565 or stop by our office on the first floor o f Daniel’s Hall.

one million students took the qualifying test.

The National Merit Scholarship Corp. (NMSC), a not-for-profit organization that operates without government funding, conducts the Merit Scholar-

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S um m er P ro g ram A ctivities The Summer Programs Activities Assistant will be responsible fo r the activities programming component of the WPI Pre-College Program. This program is directed at preparing high school juniors fo r careers in the science and engineering fields.

S t a f f R e s p o n s ib il it ie s

Plan now for Baccalaureate, Commencement Baccalaureate for the Class o f 1996 and their families will be held in Alden Memorial at 5:30pm on Friday, May 17. Faculty members are encour­ aged to participate in cap and gown; they may robe at 5pm in the lower level o f Alden.

Faculty are invited to the Commencement Breakfast in the Morgan Dining Room from 7 to 10am on Saturday, May 18. Complimentary tickets may be obtained by calling Betty Hale in the Provost’s Office (ext. 5222). “More faculty each year are finding that this is a special oppor­ tunity to see their students and to wish them well,” says Raymond R. Gilbert, director o f physical education and athletics, who is coordinating these events.

Commencement follows at 11 am on the Quad­ rangle. Faculty are asked to assemble and line up behind Boynton Hall according to academic rank; graduating seniors and graduate students will line

up in front of the building. Faculty should robe in their offices and be in line at 10:30am. The procession will step off at 10:45am. Intheevenof inclement weather, Commencement will be held in Harrington Auditorium. Faculty will assemble on the first floor o f Alumni Gymnasium, while seniors and graduate students will assemble up­ stairs in the gymnasium.

Tickets will not be required for family mem­ bers if Commencement is outdoors. If it is in­ doors, staff and spouses who are not marching will be admitted through the southeast door at the front of Harrington Auditorium. Names will be checked against a gate list. Employees who plan to attend Commencement should give their names and those o f their guests to the department head before Wednesday, May 15. Each department head will forward these names to Gilbert before the end o f the day.

Head of Management Department included in Who’s Who of the World

by Jason Papadopoulos News Editor Professor McRae C. Banks II, the head o f the Management Department at WPI, has been se­ lected for inclusion in the 13th edition o f “Who’s Who in the World.” This biennial book lists some o f the most prominent people o f their respective professions.

Professor Banks, o f Holden, MA, earned a B.A. at Virginia Polytechnic Institute, an M.A. at Northwestern University, and a Ph D at Vir­

ginia State University. Before coming to WPI in August 1995, he was professor at the manage­ ment department o f the M ississippi State University’s College o f Business. Banks’ previ­ ous experience includes his position o f director o f placement for the Academy o f Management from 1992-1995; previously he was president of the Society for the Advancement o f Manage­ ment, and for five years before joining M issis­ sippi State University, he worked as an assistant professor at the Radford University, C ollege of Business, in Radford, VA,

• Coordinate all aspects of activities programming including publicity, event set-up, artist technical requirements, security and supervision of programming facilities, • Attend and participate in all staff meetings, as well as individual and emergency meetings; • Attend all orientation and training sessions prior to arrival of students; • Assist with the participant orientation to tbe Pre-College Program; • Be available to transport students to and from various transportation terminals; • Assist with the coordination and oversee recreational Field trips.

The PAA w ill work c lo se ly Wilh tb e Student A c tiv itie s O ffice in p re p a r­ ing the evening a ctivities.

Q u a l if ic a t io n s

• Full-time enrolled WPI student (during the previous academic year); • In good standing wiUh all departments of the Institute; • Available evenings (4:00 pm - ) and weekends from either July 2 to July 19, 1996 ot July 2 to August 2,1996; • Valid driver’s license and good driving record (desirable); • Age 21 or older (desirable).

A n t ic ip a t e d N e e d

• Two Program Activities Assistants from July 2 to July 19, 1996.

• One Program Activities Assistant from July 2 to August 2,1996.

C o m p e n s a t io n

• Meals on campus for the length of appointment.

• $700 for the two-week appointment.

• $900 for the four-week appointment. \ p p l i c a t i o n s a r e a v a i l a b l e in th e S t u d e n t A c t i v i t i e s O ff ic e \p /> lic < ttio n s d e a d l i n e is F r id a y . A p r i l I*), J W 6 .

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Sports

Weekly sports update - results from March 22 to March 28

by Geoff Hassard Sports Information Director Baseball (2-9) The baseball season is in full swing and the weather has been cooperating enough for the Engineers to play their games. It has been cold, but all-in-all it has been good enough. WPI began their northern schedule, after returning from Florida with a record o f 1-6, lo play Babson College a week ago Saturday before coming home to play Worcester State. They ended their week with a trip to Dudley, Mass. to play Nichols on Thursday.

Versus Babson, the Engineers got two good pitching performances from Guy Miller (W. Barnstable, MA) and Jim Blum (Worcester, MA), but were silent at the plate as the Beavers swept a doubleheader 3-0 and 4-0. The Engi­ neers could only muster six hits in the two games.

Opening day at WPI brought the Lancers o f Worcester State across the city for a single game. With the wind blowing out, the baseballs were sure to be Hying. The Lancers scored two runs in their first inning on a two-run homer, but WPI bounced back with three runs o f their own in the bottom halfof that inning. ScottTownsend Hollis, ME) led off the inning by being hit and scored on an Aviv Kaufmann (Shrewsbury, M A) double. The next batter was Miller and he set a line drive deep to center field for a two-run home run. WPI was trailing 6-5 entering the bottom o f the seventh when they took advantage of some bad pitching by the Lancers. WPI loaded the bases and went ahead for good when Justin Downing (Leominster, M A) was walked to force in a run. WPI didn’t stop there. Townsend broke the game open with a two-run single to make the score 9-6. WPI added to their total in the bottom o f the eighth when they scored three more runs

for the final 12-6. Tim Tully (Greenville, RI) pitched five scoreless innings in relief to pick up the win for WPI. Miller was the hitting star as he drove in four runs with two, two-run homers and scored four runs. Kaufmann also had a strong day scoring three runs.

Thursday the Engineers played Nichols Col­ lege. They fell behind 5-0 and made a run in the eighth inning, but couldn't pull o ff the come­ back as they dropped aclose one 5-3. Jim Blum (Worcester, M A) pitched a complete game. Tom Michalowski (Northampton, MA) had two RBI’s in the game.

Softball (0-1) The softball team opened their season Thurs­ day versus those same Lancers o f Worcester State, unfortunately the result was different as WPI fell 8-4. WPI was behind 4-1 at the end o f the first inning. Although they pul together three runs in the bottom o f the fifth, they were not able to get any closer. Highlights for the Engineers were, Steph Torrey (Worcester, MA) had two hits and stole home and Tracy Langis (Westport, MA) had two hits.

M en ’s Track (3-0) The men’s track team opened a week ago Saturday at the freezing, but friendly confines o f Alumni Track. It was not the most ideal o f conditions for personal bests, but adequate enough to compete. The Engineers ended up smoking the competition by scoring 140 points.

The next closest was Eastern Connecticut with 40, then Worcester state with 14 and finally Clark with 7.

The long list of scorers was headed by Jeff Coleman (Rehoboth, MA) who won both the long jump and 110-meter high hurdles. The rest o f the list is as follows: Brian McKenna (Pawtucket, RI) won the hammer; Mike Pockoski

IceCats ace Aces: Hat-trick by York carries ‘Cats to third straight win

by Andrew Marsella Associate Editor The Worcester IceCats iced their third straight victory last Friday night (the 29th), stomping on the Cornwall Aces by a score of 4-2. The win brought the IceCats’ overall record to 31-29-12 (with three overtime losses-worth a point each), good for 77 points and second place in the North­ ern Division. The Aces, who arc affiliated with

this level has com e as a pleasant surprise to the IceCats, who have recently lacked offen ­ siv ely , due to a greatly depleted roster.

Defenseman Ken Sutton also played well for the ‘Cats, notching three assists, and Goalie Jamie McLennan made 27 saves to earn his 10th victory as an IceCat. Defenseman Jason Widmer also scored for the ‘Cats, adding his 4th goal o f the season on the pow er play at 9:54 o f the 1st period.

(Day ville, CT) won the discus and placed fourth in the shot put; Dave LaFleur won the shot put; Chris Neumaier (Vernon, CT) won the javelin; Marc Lefebvre (Adams, MA) won the high jump; David Bowler (Cumberland, RI) won the pole vault; David Hawes (Seal Harbor, ME) won the 100-meter dash and the 400-meter interm ediate hurdles; S teve LaBranche (Uncasville, CT) was a double winner in the 400 and 1,500-meter run; Bruce Meacham (Exeter, NH) won the 3,000-m eter steeple­ chase; Dan Sadowski (Ashfield, MA) placed second in the discus and shot put; Stan Farrell (Augusta, ME) placed in four events as he was second in the triple jump, second in the pole vault, third in the javelinand fourth in the long jump; Doug Martin (Biddeford, ME) placed second in the 110 hurdles and fourth in the 400 hurdles; Dan Nashold (Rocky Hill, CT) took second in the 200-meter dash and third in the 100; Peter Manolakis (Peabody, MA) finished second in the 400 run; Tyler Lupien(Waldoboro, ME) took second in the 400 hurdles and second inthe3,000steeplechase; Rick Crispo (Andover, MA) was second in the 800-meter run; Tim Caldwell (Dover-Foxcroft, ME) finished sec­ ond in the 1,500; Aaron Korthas (Gloucester, MA) placed third in the hammer; Ben Linnus (Westminster, MA) took third in both the discus and shot and fourth in the hammer; Chris Brennan (Providence, RI) placed third in (he long jump; Mike Bugbee (Plympton, MA) placed third in the triple jump; David Dion (Auburn, MA) placed third in the 200; Keith Levesque (Nashua, NH) finished third in 400 run; Bill Freed (Stockton, NJ) placed third in the 400 hurdles and fourth in 110 hurdles; Rich Person (Sutton, MA) took third in the 800; Frank Murphy (New Britain, CT) placed third in the 5,000-meter run; Dan Atkinson (Dedham, MA) placed fourth in the pole vault; Brian

Burwick (Acton, MA) placed fourth in the 200.

W om en’s Track (3-0) The women’s track team competed along with the men at the same meet. They were victorious as well.as they accumulated 78 points.

Eastern Connecticut was second with 44, Worcester State was third with 35 and Clark was fourth with 12.

We had three triple placewinners as Sunny Hwang (Manchester, CT), Heather Mazzaccaro (Bristol, CT) and Tina Gallos (Manchester, NH) all had strong afternoons. Hwang won both the 100-meter dash and 100-meter hurdles as well as placing third in the shot put. Mazzaccaro placed second in both the 100 and 200-meter dashes and took fourth in the javelin. Gallos won the triple jump, placed third in the 100 hurdles and took second in the high jump. We had a few double event place-finishers as well. Elaine Mongeon (Southbridgc, MA) won the 400-meter intermediate hurdles and placed third in the high jump. Heather Cleary (Pembroke, MA) won the long jump and placed third in the 200. Sue Shorrock (N. Smithfield, RI) placed second in the 1,500 and fourth in the high jump. Patty Panlilio (Holyoke, M A) took second in the ham­ mer and third in the discus. Sue MacPherson (Hudson, MA) placed fourth in both the hammer and discus. Alison Keach (Chepatchet, RI) placed fourth in both the 100 and 200. Ellen Roach (Plainville, MA) finished second in the discus. Rachel Kupcinskas (Millbury, MA) was second in the triple jump. V icky Dulac (Manchester, NH) placed second in the 400meter run. Sarah Wilcox (Wakefield, MA) took second in the 3,000-meter run. Janel Lanphere (Westerly, RI) was second in the 5,000-meter run. Melanie Heck (W. Buxton, ME) placed third in the 400 run. Jody Terranova (Westerly, RI) finished third in the 400 hurdles.

Spring sports preview

by Heather Mazzaccaro Sports Editor The weather is getting warmer, the sun is shining, so why not check out some o f the teams we have playing spring sports this season. Sports in season include men and women’s track & field, men and women's lacrosse, men’s tennis, softball, baseball, and golf.

The track teams both started their spring season o ff with strong wins over Clark Univer­ sity, Worcester State, and ECSU. The men’s team is strong in depth and plans to compete for the conference title. The women’s team, while much smaller than the men’s team, is composed o f high quality athletes and should also be very competitive in the conference. The teams are coached by Jim Smith, Bill Cotter, and Merl Norcross.

Men’s tennis, coached by Marc Young in his third season an WPI, hopes to grow on its building season of 1995. The team is returning 5 quality players and has many promising play­ ers. The coach expects to steady the team in the middle of the conference and perhaps surprise some o f the stronger teams.

The WPI g o lf team , headed by M el Massucco, is heading into the spring season with several veterans, including captain, Jeff Peterson, ’96. However, the team lacks depth but hopes to be com petitive if players can make the matches.

The softball, baseball, and lacrosse teams are also planning on having winning seasons this year. To show support for these teams and your fellow classmates, pick up a spring sports sched­ ule in Alumni and try to come down and cheer WPI on to victory. Hope to see you at the games.

NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTOS / ED CAMERON NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTO / ED CAMERON

Above: IceC ats’ right wing Sergei Kharin leads an attack onto the A ces’ ice. The IceC ats came away with a victory, putting them in second place in the Northern Division. the NHL’s Colorado Avalanche, played their first game of the season against a Northern Division opponent. The game also marked the return o f former IceCat Denis Chalifoux to Centrum ice.

Chalifoux, who led the ‘Cats in scoring last season with 21 goals and 32 assists in 53 games, leads the Aces this year as well, with 18 goals and 43 assists in 65 games.

The IceCats dominated a majority o f the game on Friday, and were sparked o ffen ­ sively by a hat-trick from newcomer Harry York, in only 5 games with Worcester, York has scored 4 goals and added an assist to the IccCats’ attack. His obvious ability lo play at

The ‘Cats three wins in a row com es after a season high five-gam e losing streak, effe c­ tively halting W orcester’s slide in the stand­ ings and putting them in a good position for hom c-icc advantage in the Caldcr Cup play­ offs. Don't miss the IccCats when they re­ turn to Centrum ice on April IOth lo lace o ff against the Adirondack R edwings, and again on Friday April 12th versus the Springfield Falcons. The Springfield game is “C ollege Night with the Worcester IceCats”; tickets can be purchased in advance from the Stu­ dent A ctivities office for only $5or by calling Tim Cutler at the IceCats office: 798-5400!

Right, top: A shot gets past IceCat goalie Jam ie M cLennan and into the net for one o f the A ces’ two goals. McLennan earned his 10th victory as an IceCat by making 27 saves. , . Right* bottom: IceC at L,indsay VaUis’ shot i.%blPfk<;4 A CK J&ojiHe Jean-Francois Labbe.

However, four IceCats shots would get by the A ces’ goalie.

I

NEWSPEAK STAFF PHOTOS ED CAMERON

N ewspeak

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& En t e r t a in m e n t

Guster to perform at WPI Guster, and “alterno-acoustic” rock hand, will perform at 8:30pm on Friday, April 5, in Riley Commons. A dm ission is $3 for WPI and C olleges o f Worcester Consortium stu­ dents and $6 for the public. The performance is sponsored by the WPI Social Committee.

One o f Boston's fastest-grow ing bands.

Under the mug

Guster has headline show s throughout New England and the United States in such venues as the Avalon, Mama Kin and Paradise clubs in Boston and the Wetlands in New York City. The band was nominated for Outstand­ ing New Local Rock Act at the Boston M usic Awards.

SocComm Movie Channel Schedule The SocComm movie channel (WPI channel 12) airs from 6:00pm - 2:00ain Monday through Saturday. Suggestions for films can be directed via email to soccomm@wpi or by phone, x5509. The full month’s schedule is available online at http://www.wpi.edu/~soccomm/FUms/schedule.htral.

The first movie of each night will be repeated after the third movie has been shown.

Tuesday, April 2

Friday, April 5

Bye, B ye L ove V irtuosity O nce W ere W arriors

Sunset Boulevard Pum p Up T he Volume Basketball Diaries

Wednesday, April 3

Saturday, April 6

Blue Velvet Princess C araboo Flatlines

Tom m y Boy Star Trek G enerations Johnny M nem onic

Thursday, April 4

Monday, April 8

The Net Bad G irls Glengarry Glen Ross

H igher Learning National Lampoon Senior Trip D rop Dead Fred NKWSPKAK STAFF PHOTO / ALI KKACK

T he star of the C offeehouse show on M arch 19 was Hewitt H untw ork, w ho put on a fine show for the ’H ouse's patrons.

WPIR D-Term Schedule 9 0 .1 FM C ab le Sunday

M onday

WPI C a b le 3 8 W ednesday

Tuesday

T h u rs d a y

12 AM 2 AM

Carlos M oreira

12 PM 2 PM

Rachel Kupcinskas D ave Maxson

2 PM 4 PM

B ill G o o d e B ill D u r b in

M ik e C a p rio Seann Ives

Jen Johnson

Jeff Peterson Craig Ham mond

K irs ty R e id y

Steve D u p re e

Francis D unn

Paul Y eam an J ohn M o c k

Brian Jones

Laura G laser

Michael O ’Bryant

Seth Heidkamp

M a t B revard

Cyndi Adamo

Marc Lefebvre

D a n Bailey

Paul Johnson Kenny Volock

C yn d i Adam o

Ryan Young Gavin Kennedy

Justin Urban Christian Kuiawa Jay Heminger

Brian G ib s o n

A d a m V ie ira

Ben Fisk Michael Leduc

A d a m T e rio

T o m C a rr

AJ M c G u ire

M ik e C a p rio

M a tt D u c e y

K im Belli

Peter C h ilt o n

Chris Brennan D ave Coutu Makio Watanabe

K e lly P lo u ffe

6 PM 8 PM

C aporale

10 PM 12 AM

S a tu rd a y

Jeff Naw rocki Daniel Topazio

4 PM 6 PM

8 PM 10 PM

F r id a y

Stefan

A d am H o w es K evin B oyd

Todd Dibble Thomas Custodio

*WPIR reserves the right to make changes to this schedule without notice.

John Sullivan

Debra Green man Jony Laplante

Seann Ives

R equest L in e : x 5 9 5 5

T o m a k e a W P IR C a m p u s A n n o u n c e m e n t or t o o b ta in m o r e in fo r m a tio n a b o u t W P IR , c h e c k o u t o u r W o r ld W id e W eb P a g e at < h ttp ://w w w .w p i.e d u /~ r a d io > .

Y o u c a n a l s o g i v e u s a c a ll o n o u r B u s i n e s s L ine a t x 5 9 5 6 .

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T u e s d a y , A p r il 2 ,1996

N e w sp e a k

rts

& En t e r t a in m e n t

Under the mug

Guster to perform at WPI Guster, and "alterno-acoustic” rock hand, will perform at 8:30pm on Friday, April 5, in Riles Commons. A dm ission is $3 for WPI and C olleges o f Worcester Consortium stu­ dents and $6 for the public. The performance is sponsored by the WPI Social Committee.

One of Boston's fastest-growing bands, r

Guster has headline shows throughout New England and the United States in such venues as the Avalon, Mama Kin and Paradise clubs in Boston and the Wetlands in New York City. The band was nominated for Outstand­ ing N ew Local Rock Act at the Boston Music Awards.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ^

SocComm Movie Channel Schedule The SocComm movie channel (WPI channel 12) airs from 6:00pm - 2:00am Monday through Saturday. Suggestions for films can be directed via email to soccomm@\vpi or by phone, x5509. The full month’s schedule is available online at http://www.wpi.edu/~soccomin/Filins/schedule.html.

The first movie of each night will be repeated after the third movie has been shown.

Tuesday, April 2

Friday, April 5

Bye, Bye Love V irtuosity O nce W ere W arriors

Sunset Boulevard Pum p Up The Volum e B asketball Diaries

Wednesday, April 3

Saturday, April 6

Blue Velvet Princess C araboo Flatlines

Tom m y Boy Star Trek Generations Johnny M nem onic

T h u rsd a y , A p r il 4

M o n d a y , A p r il 8

The Net Bad Girls G lengarry Glen Ross

Higher Learning National Lampoon Senior Trip Drop Dead Fred The star of the C offeehouse show ou M arch 19 was Hewitt H untwork, w ho put on a fine show for the ’House's patrons.

WPIR D-Term Schedule 90.1 FM Cable Sunday

M onday

WPI Cable 38 W ed n esd ay

Tuesday

T h u rs d a y

12 AM 2 AM

Carlos Moreira

12 PM 2 PM

Rachel Kupcinskas Dave Maxson

2 PM 4 PM

Bill G o o d e

4 PM 6 PM 6 PM 8 PM

8 PM -

10 PM

10 PM 12 AM

F r id a y

Bill D u r b in

S a tu rd a y M ik e C a p rio Seann Ives

Jen Johnson

Jeff Peterson Craig Hammond

K irs ty R e id y

Steve D u p ree

Francis D u n n

Paul Yeam an John M o c k

Jeff Nawrocki Daniel Topazio

B rian Jones

Laura Glaser

Michael O ’Bryant

Seth Heidkamp

M a t Brevard

Cyndi Adamo

Marc Lefcbvre

D a n Bailey

Paul Johnson Kenny Volock

C y n d i A d am o

Ryan Young Gavin Kennedy

Justin Urban Christian Kuiawa Jay Heminger

Brian G ib so n

A d a m V ie ira

Ben Fisk Michael Leduc

A d a m T e r io

T o m C a rr

AJ M c G u ire

M ik e C a p rio

M a tt D u c e y

K im Belli

Peter C h ilto n

Chris Brennan Dave Coutu Makio Watanabe

K e lly P louffe Stefan C aporale

A d a m H o w es K evin Boyd

Todd Dibble Thomas Custodio

*WPIR reserves the right to make changes to this schedule without notice.

John Sullivan

Debra Greenm an Jony Laplante

Seann Ives

R equest Line: x 5 9 5 5

T o m a k e a W PIR C a m p u s A n n o u n c e m e n t or t o o b t a in m o r e in fo r m a t io n a b o u t W P IR , c h e c k o u t o u r W o r ld W id e W eb P age at < h ttp ://w w w .w p i.e d u /~ r a d io > .

Y o u c a n a ls o g i v e u s a c a ll o n o u r B u s i n e s s L in e a t x 5 9 5 6 .

T u e s d a y , A pril 2 , 1 9 9 6

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N ewspeak

ew s

RPI Major flies WPI Cadets 1926 and 1922 to fly Boston Univ Cadets at N orw ood and W orcester Poly C adets at W orcester, respectively.

After testing the winds at BED which were 280 @ 8k and 300 @ 18k at ORH, 87T was ready to go. First Lieutenant Jerry Vinokur, Goddard Sqdn., had an enthusiastic group o f Cadets ready and eager to fly. T w elve Cadets were to fly that day, utilizing planes from H an scom S q d n ., F itch b u rg S q d n ., and W estover Sqdn.

Cadet flight assignments were made and Cadets: Stevens (Frosh), Murphy (Senior), Poisson (Frosh) and Hartz (Soph) drew N6287T. All four Cadets were on their third flight, which was “Instruments” which simplified the flight planning. The Cadets were allowed to manipu­ late the flight controls enroute and each Cadet had 1 hour o f Stick-time. The syllabus con­ sisted o f shallow turns, left and right, shallow dives and pull-ups etc. Their primary focus, however, was flying a designated course using the aircraft instruments to proceed to their destination. Use was made o f VOR, LORAN and NDB navigation, all the while making the

from Louis A. Takacs, Jr. Takacs Group Co. Goddard squadron, Worcester, was Finally the scene of much AFROTC Cadet flying on St. Patrick’s Day. After many bouts with the weather, all of which he lost. Major Lou Takacs was tasked to fly AFROTC Cadets from W orcester Poly on 17 Mar. The fly-day had been scheduled for 16 Mar BUT with a venturi effect from a Low to the East and a High to the West winds were blow ing 25 knots with gusts to 35 knots so the exercise was canceled. All hopes o f flying Cadets were dashed for the fourth time in three weeks.

Then, an unexpected and w elcom e call from Capt. Parker was received late Sunday afternoon: “Can you fly on Sunday?” Is Boston in M assachusetts??? - YES! A ssign ­ ment w as made, N 6287T was released; and we were ready to go.

Sunday dawned clear, cold and- CALM .

Majors Rothstein and Takacs rendezvoused at the flight line to preflight CAP Flights

obligatory CAP radio check calls. Each Cadet did well handling the radio and the controls and seemed to be quite impressed with the instru­ ments and the flow of useful information which they transmitted.

Since these are after all Air Force Cadets, the highlight o f the flights were the fly-overs o f B arnes/W estfield and W estover A FB, where they all had an opportunity to look

N

DOWN on the A -lO ’s and C -5 A ’s. They o f course had aspirations in that direction. One Cadet who thought she might like to be a pilot and has 13 hours (now 14) through the CAP allowed as how she thinks she had changed her mind and would prefer to maintain the Air Force Bases as a C ivil Engineer!

Can’t win them all BUT 1 feel the AF will get one fine C ivil Engineer.

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N ewspeak

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E d it o r ia l

Wrinkles in the new housing selection process As many o f you know, last week saw that joyous annual event in which students vie for on-cam pus housing for the next academic year. This year, it was different: the infamous lottery was replaced by a system which was touted as being better (one would certainly not intend to change to a worse system , after all). “N o more lottery!” said an ad in a previous issue o f Newspeak. The new system was supposed to “cut down on lines, keep people on campus who wish to stay, and ease up the process" (Newspeak, 2/13/96). Indeed, in the same issue, Assistant Director o f Residential Services Kris Neindorf hopes that “students w ill...bear with the beginnings o f the process,” and says, “it will take some time to iron out a few wrinkles here and there.”

But at whose expense do these wrinkles get ironed out?

Housing is a very important thing for many students; it’s not the type o f thing that should be tinkered with if som eone is going to suffer.

One o f the problems seem ed to be that things were so confusing. I’m not sure why this was; maybe it is because the system is new. Quite a few people were unsure about what they

could and could not do. For exam ple, if som eone you wanted to live with was squatting and you wanted to move in with him, why couldn’t you go lo room selection on the first night?

Although Residential Services described the process, people still got confused.

Perhaps one o f the worst things that happened last w eek, however, happened on the last day o f room selection. This was the day that students move into different buildings, or from offcampus to on-cam pus rooms. Some concerned students camped out in the W edge overnight in hopes o f getting to be first in the first-com e, first-serve order.

Residential Services typically started to give tickets repre­ senting who was first at around 4:30pm on previous days. On this day, however. Res Services decided to throw that out the window and started giving out these tickets around 12:00pm!

This was ridiculous: for a whole half hour, students were given these tickets. One hundred tickets were given out in that lime.

An argument for doing this might be that the campers would have been the first anyway, so it didn’t matter if they were given a ticket at 12:00pm or at 4:30pm. They might have been first

either way. I guess this is one o f those wrinkles that has to be ironed out. You just can’t change the rules in the middle o f the game, though! Consider a different scenario: If a bunch o f residents were being loud one night, the police w on’t extend quiet hours for them, no matter how many loud residents there were! Sim ilarly, no matter how many people camped out in the W edge, the time at which “first-com e, first-serve”ness would be determined should not have moved!

Had I follow ed the rules and gone to the Wedge at 4:30pm to get in order, 1 would have been very much out o f luck. A s it was, I had number 101 (I caught Kris on her way out o f the W edge).

Granted, it appears as if everyone who wanted housing got it.

H owever, I know a fair number o f people who are displeased with their housing situation: they got rooms they didn’t want, or they’re living with roommates they have never heard o f before.

Even though everyone hated it, the lottery was fair. It was random. It let people know ahead o f time if they should probably be looking for off-cam pus housing. People were yearning for the lottery last w eek. Is this new system really the way to go?

Com m entary

Just A Thought WPVs Future - New Day or Retreaded Cliches?

by Stephen Brown Protestant Campus M inistry Last w eek ’s N ewspeak front page was a classic study in irony. The top o f the front page’s headline trum­ peted the sad tale o f the denial o f tenure to four professors in M echani­ cal Engineering. Then just below the masthead was the headline WPI gears up for the next millennium: " E n g in eerin g C r ite r ia 2 0 0 0 ’* progress. After reading those two articles and D o u g la s W a lcer z’ s speech, 1 wondered just what direc­ tion W hoopie Tech was heading.

It seem s to me that like every other college or university 1 have either attended or worked at, WPI has yet to settle one o f the oldest debates in academia: which counts most, great teaching or great sch ol­ arship? Actually, that is wrong, be­ cause the Provost here has cast his

vote. Scholarship wins again. What a surprise. Once more young, cre­ ative, and innovative professors are being cast aside because they have not danced to the proper fiddler. Old story, old result.

I was saddened when 1 read Pro­ fessor W alcerz’s speech in which he detailed how he and his colleagues had p rop osed new and crea tiv e projects, developed them with the approval o f the faculty and the Pro­ vost. Then when it came time for tenure review, they were told that such was not the kind o f scholarship that gets you tenured. Why were they surprised? Did they really be­ lieve they could not be set up and used and then cast aside at the whim o f the Provost?

I have seen the same done in the ministry, in the Health Care industry and in the public school system . Su­ pervisors will give you all the rope

CSDC

you want, let you run with your cre­ ative ju ices to your heart’s content, and you even can invent cold fusion.

But if you don’t pay allegiance to the traditional customs and rules, don’t do what has always been done, then you are just fooling yourself. The pile o f bodies that have been cast aside by supervisors who have used and then thrown away young inno­ vative hotshots would climb past the tower on Boynton Hall.

The “People in Charge” are scared to death o f creativity and innova­ tion. Behind the sm iles and encour­ agement is a dagger waiting to strike.

The “People in Charge" want to stay in charge, thus they have a great deal at stake in the status quo. They are the ones who encourage scholars to keep writing articles so specialized that even the people in the journal's field don’t understand them. But writing for such mundane journals

m Fr o m

T h e O ld T r e e He remembered the first time he sat under the tree. He was a fresh­ man and had no friends. Feeling alone, the tree seem ed a comforting place to sit and share problems with the universe. A senior now, in his last term, he found him self spending more and more time sitting against the trunk of the old tree. The tree had become a friend. He had grown to love these brief tim es with the tree, feeling the rough fissures pressing against his back, the wind whistling through the branches, the sm ell o f the new green buds. His eyelids grew heavy, and sleep fell over him as the warm wind swirled around his face. In the throes of sleep he asked questions o f his friend. How many hours had they spent together since his freshman year? How many co n ­ versations had been shared with friends and lovers? How many tears ?

How much laughter ? How many great thoughts?

“Many great thoughts, my friend.”

The young man sat up, startled by the voice that had answered his s i­ lent question. Som ething or som e­ one was pressing against his left arm.

Quickly turning his head, he saw a most disconcerting sight. There next to him, sitting on the carpct o f grass leaning against the old tree, was an old man. Not just any old man, but an old man w hose beard and hair were covered in leaves. No more than that. His beard and hair were leaves. And he had a bird’s nest on his shoulder and the air around him sm elled o f sunshine. The young man shook his head, “Sunshine doesn’t smell and old men don’t have green skin.”'

“D on’t be afraid, my friend. I w on’t stay long. I’ve come to thank you for your friendship and to wish you w ell. I will m iss you too.” The young man, still too numb to speak, just stared at the gentle, sm iling face o f the old man. “ No need to speak.

Though I don’t m ove, my life is rich because o f the many people like you who through the years have come and shared their lives, hopes, w oes, and dreams with me. And I bless you all equally with shade, wonderful sm ells, a trunk to lean against, and the wind to talk to. It doesn’t matter to me who you are or what you be­ lieve. All are my relatives. I’ll always be here for you. All you must do is think o f me and I will be with you. But please com e back, visit, sit under my branches and lean against me. I need affection and have great affection to share.”

Under an old tree a young man stirred, woke from a peaceful nap.

He looked around, alone, yet not feeling quite alone. Was it a dream?

It didn’t seem to matter. With great affection he placed his hand on the trunk o f the old tree and whispered, "Thank you, I will not forget you. I will be back to visit.” The young man rose and returned to the busi­ ness o f being a senior.

W a lk in g d ow n the sid e w a lk dragged a young girl, tears rolling down her face. Her freshman year had been hard enough and now her boyfriend had just dumped her for another woman. She felt so alone.

She looked up and for a moment thought she saw the outspread arms o f som eone ready to hug her. She blinked back a tear and saw it was only the branches o f an old tree. But she was weary and decided to sit down and lean against the rough fis­ sures. She began to share her w oes....

his credibility would be destroyed.

If it com es to a choice between four nice guys with a bit o f creativity who w ouldn’t play by the o l’ boys rules, and the Provost who is the head o f the faculty w hose job it is to enforce the o l’ boys rules, the choice is a no brainer. The “People in Charge” a lw a y s p ro tect the “ P e o p le in Charge.”

So how does this get W hoopie Tech ready for “Engineering Crite­ ria 2000?” It appears that WPI 2000 will look at lot like WPI 1900. Maybe som eday some provost w ill discover that som e people are great scholars and som e are great teachers, but very few are both. And WPI needs both.

Maybe someday tenure w ill award scholarly and/or teaching excellence in an open discussion where every­ one concerned will be honest and forthright about the process. For now, hope is all we have.

E d it o r

Concerns about last week’s issue From

by Tom Balistrieri, D irector Counseling and Student D evelopm ent

the

are safer for the “People in Charge” than creative innovations that might actually further our comm on life to­ gether.

What Professor Walcerz and c o l­ leagues forgot was Rule #1: the Boss is alw ays right! And if the boss does not want you here, despite whatever previous assurances and encourage­ ments you have received, y o u ’re gone. The real tragedy is that we will never know the real reason why these four men were denied tenure.

Was it m oney, or too many tenured profs already here, or some under­ ground power play: who knows? The Provost has the power and he exer­ cised it; it is not up to us to question the “People in Charge.”

Send all the letters o f protest and petitions you want, but they will end up in the garbage can. For if the Provost were to be reversed on his decision he would have to leave, for

the Editor:

A couple o f concerns have been raised about some information in last week’s issue o f Newspeak.

First, our apologies to Professor Griffin, who is an excellent teacher in the Department of Social Science and Policy Studies, not the Department of Mechanical Engineering as has been previously stated in the Newspeak ar­ ticle regarding tenure decisions and last week’s editorial.

We would also like to extend our apologies lo Andrea Dorrow. Last

week, Newspeak printed a Greek Cor­ ner which addressed, in a rather scath­ ing tone, recent decisions about alco­ hol supported by the Greek Alumni Council and the Intrafratemity Coun­ cil. Newspeak stands by its decision to print the submitted column on the basis that it discussed a relevant issue con­ cerning the community. Newspeak’s philosophy on the Greek Comer sub­ missions is that each submission re­ flects the fraternity which writes it; the submissions are in no way Newspeak's reporting or opinion. For the Greek

Comer, Newspeak simply serves as the vehicle by which fraternities may make themselves known to the community.

Therefore, we will not remove a sub­ mission because we think it would make a fraternity look bad; if that’s what they submit to us (i.e., if that’s how they want to be known), that’s what we will print (within limits). Complaints about any Greek Comer submissions should be brought up with the fraternity in question, not Newspeak, unless the complaint is specifically newspaper related.

W

N ew speak The Student Newspaper of Worcester Polytechnic Institute c/o Student Activities Office, 100 Institute Road, Worcester, Massachusetts 01609 Phone (508) 831-5464 • Fax (508) 831-5721 newspeak@wpi.edu • http://www.wpi.edu/~newspeak Editor-In-Chief David Koelle

Sp orts E d ito r

News Editor

Heather Mazzaccaro

Jason Papadopoulos

Edltor-in-CWe! Emeriti

Writing Staff

Vijay Chandra Kristen Greene Brian Parker

Beatrice Grygo Pamela Kelly Jennx Yambert Jesse Zbikowski

Associate Editors Donna Edzards Andrew Marsella Carlos Zapata

Cartoonists Jason Cooper Eric Wilhelm

Features Editor

Advertising M anager Lisa Bartee Advertising Assistant Sharon Bosse

Photography Editor Ed Cameron

Circulation Manager Brian Pothier

B usiness Manager Vacant

Fac u lty A dvisor

Graphics Editor Eric Wilhelm

Photography Staff Steve Brockway Emily Brunkhorst Kimberly James Alison Keach Jeff Peterson Steve Sluter Eric Wilhelm

Graphics Staff Jonathan Tanner

Kim Farrell

Ben Fischer

John Trimbur

Typist

W PI Newspeak ol Worcester Polytechnic Institute, formerly the Tech News, has been published weekly during the academic year, except during college vacations, since 1909 Newspeak has been printed on recycled paper since January. 1991 Masthead designed by Troy Thompson for Newspeak's 21st Anniversary All articles should be typed and include the author's name and box number Copy may be sent to Newspeak. c/o Student Activities Office, or brought to the Newspeak office (Riley 01). Articles may also be submitted via e-mail All copy is due by 5:00 p.m. on the Friday preceding publication Letters to the Editor must contain the typed or printed name of the author as well as the author's signature, telephone number, and box number for verification. Students submitting letters to the editor should put their class after their name. Faculty and staff should include their full title Letters deemed libelous or irrelevant to the W PI community will not be published. All Club and Greek corners must be submitted via e-mail and be 275 words or less.

All ads are due by 5:00 p.m. on the Thursday preceding publication Any submissions received after this time will be sub|ect to a flat $15 late fee per ad.

Advertisements, including classified ads. will not be accepted via email Classified ads must be prepaid. The decision on whether a submission is a public service announcement or an advertisement lies with the editors.

The editorial is written by a member or members of the Newspeak staff. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions of the entire Newspeak staff The editors reserve the right to edit all copy for correct punctuation and spelling as well as appropriate content Printing is done by Saltus Press First Class postage paid at Worcester. Massachusetts. Subscription rate is $20 00 per school year, single copies 75 cents within the continental United States. Make all checks payable to W PI Newspeak

Letters

t o th e

Page 7

N ewspeak

T u e s d a y , A pr il 2 , 1 9 9 6

Ed it o r

Secrecy of Skull Tomb questioned To the Editor: I w ould like to thank Donna Emma Edzards for bringing us her ten part series on the History and Traditions o f WPI. Each week I have looked forward to this column which gave an insightful look at the unique his­ tory o f this institute. Her stories ran the gamut from the Tech Carnival to the Red Vector.

Most o f her articles centered on events, items, and people which have passed and are only memories. How­ ever, she also wrote o f traditions and artifacts which still remain alive to­ day, like the Winter Carnival and the Alden Laboratories. As members o f the WPI community it is important

LsJ £ artdisplayrf l yln.de!en,,?,

To the Editor:

campus which one cannot tour if he asks the right person. Perhaps it is a sim p le build in g, but as Edzards pointed out in her article it is still an important part o f the history o f this school. I would challenge the Skull to open its doors for at least one day each year. Perhaps they could pro­ vide a historical tour during Tradi­ tions Day. In closing 1 ask, how can we begin to understand the past, if we are not allow ed to explore the artifacts that still remain?

to participate in those traditions and explore those artifacts, if we are to full appreciate our interesting his­ tory.

It is for that reason, that I read Edzards last article with much inter­ est. In that article on the “Magnetic Laboratory” she wrote o f a building that is very much a part o f this Insti­ tute, but is in fact closed to the gen­ eral com m unity’s view . Since enter­ ing WPI, I have often wonder why this part o f our history has been shut out. I have much respect for the senior honor society, but have trouble understanding their secrecy with this building.

There is no other building on this

Respectfully, Gregory R. Snow A proud member o f the WPI community and the Class o f '98

Response to art display brings counter-response To the Editor: After reading the letter to the edi­ tor by Peter H. D ell’Erba I had to write in. I w on’t deny him his right to an opinion, but I felt that a few facts should be pointed out which he seems to be m issing. Let me start with the easiest. Mr. D ell’Erba said "I alw ays thought that the library was a public facility, open to people o f all ages for the use o f literature research and study.” W ell the last time I checked WPI was a private institute and therefore the facilities are not a public resource. WPI how ­ ever, like many colleges, allows the com m unity to use the facility at no charge. This is a privilege, not a right, and therefore I do believe the librarians response o f "well, if a par­ ent d o esn ’t want their children to see the pictures, they don’t have to go up there" is justified. A lso the last time I checked WPI was indeed a college which im plies an average age o f over 18. I do realize we have Mass Acad­ emy students here also, but for the most part if they are in this program I think they are mature enough to handle seeing the pictures.

I have to admit...before this letter came out, I didn’t even notice the pictures and I’ve been on the third

floor o f the library quite a few times already this term. Therefore, I had to go see what caused this com m en­ tary. Personally, I think the pictures are tastefully done and therefore are art but not pornography. Pornogra­ phy has a connotation o f being de­ grading, I don’t feel that these pic­ tures are degrading to anyone. If anyone hasn’t gone to check out these pictures yet, do it, see what ail the fuss is about and decide for yourself.

I b e lie v e in the fr e ed o m o f expression...it works, and trying to force others to conform to your ideas o f what is appropriate, especially amongst a comm unity o f adults, is a form o f censorship. Mr. D ell’Erba, do you have any problems with any o f the “c la ssic” artwork, such as the statue o f David, or is it only the modern works you have a problem with? Fighting over what is porno­ graphic or obscene is not going to get anyone anywhere because both are defined personally....what is por­ nographic to you may not be porno­ graphic to me or a majority o f the campus. If you don’t like the pic­ tures, m ove your locker to Salisbury, it is after all the commuter center, or just don't look al the pictures, as I said before I had been up there nu­

merous lime previously and never noticed them, it is possible to walk by the pictures without looking at them.

One other thing that bothered me about this article was the last para­ graph. Summarized, Mr. D e ll’Erba basically condemns anyone w ho sees these pictures as art to hell, claim ing his b elief to be the only “true” one and that he will be “justified by His grace.” As one Christian to another, Mr. D e ll’Erba, I do not find these pictures pornographic nor do I be­ lieve that the wrath o f God w ill be­ fall me because o f this belief. Art is art and unless these pictures are be­ ing used in a perverse way, which being in the library I find very hard lo believe, they are not pornographic and we who choose to look upon them as an acceptable art form do NOT have to repent and fear for our souls. God created the human body (if you believe theology) and threw us into this world with nothing to cover his creation. Adam and Eve wore no clothes in the garden until the devil tempted them ....God wasn’t ashamed or embarrassed by his cre­ ation. Why should we be?

O nce again we have proof that Americans are #1 in the world when it com es to whining about irrelevant topics. This time the exam ple com es from one o f our own: Peter H. D ell’Erba. In last w eek’s Newspeak (March 26, 1996), Mr. D ell’Erba e x ­ ercised his right to free speech by informing the readers o f how he was offended by a recent display in the library. At the same time, he also d e m o n stra ted his c lo s e d m indedness. What Mr. D cll’Erba does not seem to realize is that we all com e from different backgrounds, have different experiences, and d if­ ferent moral values. What one per­ son believes is offensive may in fact be art to another, as he pointed out.

H o w e v e r , it ap p ears that M r.

I suppose we must all suffer small indignities in our professional as well as personal lives. Some are best ignored, but others require an apology. In your lead article on recent tenure decisions Professor Griffin is identified as a mem­ ber o f the ME faculty. Your editorial implies the same. Newspeak should be aware, as much of the rest of the campus

....

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1:30 PM -4:30 PM Windows: Part II

ft,,, 9:00 AM • 12:00 PM Word; Introduction

1.30 P M -4:30 PM Word: Introduction

........ ...........- 23 ...

1 30 PM 4:30 PM 9:00 AM - 10:00 AM Windows: Using Pine: Part I Introduction 10:00 AM - 11:00 AM Using Pine: Advanced Techniques

_________ 24-------------- ........................ M .

9:00 A M - 10:00 AM Using Pine: Introduction 10:00 A M - 11:00 AM Using Pine: Advanced Techniques

-

12:00 PM Word: Introduction

Kent Rissmiller Social Science and Policy Studies

WPI students keep track of marathoners Courtesy o f WPI News-Service

N

dents’ faculty advisor, along with me­ chanical engineering Professor Brian Savilonis. “This marathon historically incurs a higher percentage of casualty rates than other marathons- either be­ cause of the nature o f the course or the fact that many runners elevate the status of Boston to a higher level than other races and tire thus more likely to push themselves beyond their physical capa­ bilities.”

For their computer model, the stu­ dents’ input data was based on assump­ tions about the total number o f runners across a discrete range o f finish times; staffing levels for the various categories of the race (including the number of available medical support personnel); weather conditions; and casualty rates for each type o f injury.

“The resulting model predicts that up to 1,000 cots should be available in the three medical tents and that the medical team will need to stock about 850 intra­ venous lines,” says Noonan. “We also have provided information to Dr. Adner on the number of medical support volun­ teers he will need to call upon to assist finishers who require medical attention.”

Ciszewski, Caldwell, and Danubio will be present on the day of the race to measure how well their model predicted the actual outcomes. The students com­ pleted their research and computer model as their Interactive Qualifying Project.

Ciszewski and Caldwell are chemical engineering majors; Danubio is major­ ing in civil engineering. All three are members of the cross-country and track teams.

ew s

WPI appoints associate provost ............. ..... I * .... .......

................. ......'

Courtesy o f WPI News Service

1:30 P M -4:30 PM Word Introduction

.......................i«

..............

1:30 P M -4:30 PM Word: Introduction

9:00 AM

1:30 PM -4:30 PM Windows: Pan I

is, that Prof. Griffin has a reputation as an outstanding teacher o f economics in the Department of Social Science and Policy Studies. We, in the department, been enriched by his presence and are not even willing to share him with Me­ chanical Engineering. You ow e him an apology.

F o c u s O n ...

CCC Web page — check it out!

8:00 A M -5:00 PM No Academic Training BRT

Dennis W. Jackson Class o f 1997

Griffin is SS professor, not ME To the Editor:

The 100th running o f the Boston Marathon on April 15 is destined to be memorable for runners and spectators alike. But in the midst of all the hype and the hustle are some real challenges for race planners and organizers. The num­ ber o f entrants could exceed 40,000- a fourfold increase in the number who Jami Walsh historically make the run- and, at certain Class o f '97 times during the race, as many as 350 could be crossing the finish line.

A computer simulation model recently C o m p u t in g com pleted by WPI juniors Kevin Ciszewski of Greenfield, Mass., Timo­ thy Caldwell o f Dover-Foxcroft, Maine, and Joseph Danubioof Pembroke, Mass., maintenance for Windows 95. This available to all as a method o f trouble

by Debbie Dexter is being used this year to help workers software is not yet supported by the shooting a problem first in hopes that Computer Trainer plan for processing everyone who com ­ CCC. There is, however, information com m on questions can be solved pletes the race and requires medical care. on the web about installing Windows quickly and easily. Please refer to this The CCC web page offers a vast “The conclusion of this study rep­ 95. You can access this information as page before contacting pc-qucstions, amount o f information such as the resents the cornerstone for the medical well from the CCC web site via the if possible.

On-line Computing Manuals, Labs, care plan for the 100th Boston Mara­ CCC Computer Shop link.

The CCC web site can be accessed On-line Help/Service, home pages thon,” says Dr. Marvin Adner, m edi­ If you cannot access the web to by entering the Academics section from o f our staff and finally the Computer cal director for the race. Adner, ch ief obtain information about the training WPI’s home page. By going through Training schedule can be accessed o f hematology at MetroWest Medical sessions being offered, please call the the Information Services section you here as w ell. The training web page Center in Framingham, Mass., is re­ Help Desk at extension 5888 or send will see a button for the College Com­ gives a general description o f all the sponsible for the planning o f all o f the e-mail to helpdesk®wpi. The CCC puter Center. sessions offered as well astheirdates medical support for the race. Last appreciates any comments regarding We have received quite a few mes­ and tim es. spring, he approached WPI’s Man­ these web pages. sages regarding the installation and The On-line Help/Service page is agement Department with a request for a computer simulation study to help the Planning Committee prepare C OM PUTER TRAINING SCHEDULE for the centennial.

‘T he finish line for the Boston Mara­ APRIL thon is like a funnel and is not conducive to easy dispersement of the finishers,” says Francis Noonan, associate profes­ Friday Thursday Wednesday T uesday Monday 5 ....................................sor o f management, who was the stua .............. . .!___ _____ 8:00 A M - 5:00 PM No Acadcmic Training -BRT

D ell’Erba does not want to accept this but would rather everyone fo l­ low his own system of moral values - a disturbing trend that can be seen throughout Am erica these days.

A lso, by invoking the “religion card,” Mr. D ell’Erbahas, in my mind, nullified his entire argument. By using th is lin e o f d e fe n s e , Mr. D ell’Erba has shown that he is not using his own thought processes and opinions, but merely reciting the view s that others have given him via his religion; which, as Mr. D e ll’Erba might not realize, there are many different religions in the world and some people do not actually follow his or any o f them.

1

1

1

9:00 A M - 12:00 PM Windows: Parti

2& 1:30 P M -'4:30 PM Windows: Part II

2

3

Interim Dean o f Academic Affairs William W. Durgin of Holden, Mass., has been appointed associate provost for academic affairs. In his new post, Durgin has primary responsibility for W PI’s academic and research pro­ grams. He provides staff support in the Provost’s Office, is in charge ofth e offices o f Projects and Enrollment Ser­ vices, Scheduling, Research Adminis­ tration, Graduate Admissions and C on­ tinuing Education, and works closely with all members o f the WPI comm u­ nity to ensure the highest quality of academic programs at the Institute.

Durgin, who joined the faculty in 1971, earned his bachelor’s and d oc­ toral degrees at Brown University and his master’s at the U ni versity of Rhode Island. The current Kenneth G.

Merriam Professor of Mechanical En­ gineering, Durgin has held a number of posts at WPI, including assistant to the provost for multidisciplinary ac­ tivities and dean o f graduate studies and research. He is a former head of the Mechanical Engineering Depart­ ment, was head o f research and devel­ opment at the former Alden Research Laboratory, and held the George I. Alden Chair. He played a central role in establishing the Aerospace Engi­ neering Program, the Fluid Dynamics and Thermal Processes Laboratory, and the Central Massachusetts Manu­ facturing Partnership.

Durgin says he sees the implementa­ tion of new undergraduate programs, the expansion of graduate and research pro­ grams, and the recruitment o f faculty and students as activities o f critical im­ portance to WPI.

Page 8

N ewspeak

T u e s d a y , A p r il 2 , 1 9 9 6

C lub C 6 rn er be Fix> Kwan. The Vice President will be the Happy-Go-Lucky Charlie. The Position of Secre­ tary will be held by Joan Lock. The position of treasurer goes to Angela Yau. The SC for next year will be Eric Toledo. And finally the Al­ mighty Historian will be Christopher Look.

Congrats to everyone!

Another thing people voted for at the last meeting was the member o f the year. I’m sure you guys all know this, but the person voted member of this year is Yukiko Ishii. This is a very prestigious award given by the CSA to recognize member who has gone beyond the call o f duty, in helping out the club. So why she got it? I have no idea! Just kidding! Really I swear! She is obvi­ ously very deserving o f this award and I congratu­ late her!

Time for the infamous homepage competition results. 1 think I'm just going to cut to the chase and list the winners. The best homepage had five winners. 1st place: Foo Kwan (new Prez!) 2nd Place: Chris Look (new and current Historian!)

3rd Place: Pedro and Nick (Two guys!) 4th or 5th place by drawing: Yu Ching Chang (A Girl!). The Most creative was Leo Liu (that creative guy in my cs classes!) Congratulations once again to everybody.

That’s all I have time for, Gotta submit this before 4:30. See ya around!

A P O

Hello, Olsiers and pledges and everyone else.

Well, we had a busy weekend. Between the Dance-a-thon, Big-Little Dinner, and Pledge Ser­ vice Project, I’m surprise anybody is still alive (Note : This was written Friday). There arc no details right now because, well, look at the note.

More information in the next club comer, hope­ fully.

Note : Tim is going to have a breakdown very soon.

Anyways, for the following month. There is the blood drive on April 3 and April 4. Dracula, I mean, the Red Cross really needs the blood.

Seriously, they really need it, so please come.

Also on the 4th, the composite picture will be taken, finally. Brain is taking everyone to a Red Sox game on the 14th...O.K., those who paid.

Afterthat is Nap-Time (Nap-Time?), and Worces­ ter Cleanup. So there is stuff going on. Oh, and we should be getting new brothers very soon.

Brother Meeting : GH227, Monday, 6:30pm.

B iL A G A

There is a DANCE at Clark on Friday, not exactly sure of the times but check your email (if yer on our lovely list) and it will tell you when where and how much. It is being co-sponsored by WPI BiLAGA and Cllark BiLAGA. Don’t re­ member who the DJ is, just remember hearing that he was cool., and that is what is going on this week. No meeting but the one at Clark tonight. As always, email bilaga@wpi for information, with questions, or whatever. Membership is confiden­ tial. Need to talk? W e’re here, and our officers are really cool too. <grin> This weeks thanks go out to all o f our faculty supporters and that wonderful girl who has totypeupthese annoying clubcomers.

Peace, Love, and enjoy the sunshine, folks!!

C h in e s e

S tu d e n t A s s o c ia tio n

Why doesn’t anyone want this position? It carries with it such authority and prestige! In addition to that you get to write Newspeak every single weekend! I thought I was through, but guess I was wrong. I got stuck with this great position again.

At least this week I don't have to make up stuff to write. This week 1 will talk about the election and the homepage competition winners. Goody!

Our new president for the year 1996 to 1997 will

C h ris tia n

B ib le

F e llo w s h ip

1feel like saying, “Another week has passed...”, but that is what I say every week. Saying it that way makes it seem as though nothing out o f the usual has happened. But, in fact, something very special happened this week. Something o f astro­ nomical proportions. We “lived” and another week has passed. How could we survive? Why were we allowed to live, and gather together?

Like for instance on Friday night for a time of fellowship and worship at FNF at 7:00pm in Morgan A? Or Saturday morning for a fun time playing sport,s at 10:30 in front on Alumni?

We live and are able to enjoy that because Jesus died on the cross for our sins, and He rose again.

"There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men.

The angel said to the women, ‘Do not be afraid, for 1 know that you are looking for Jesus, who was

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Back again. EBN is so intense! Everyone who didn’t go missed a really good time. We have to get that podium. The class o f ’97 podium. For those o f you who weren’t there, their “podium” had trackspots, strobes, revolving red lights, and laser beams on one side o f the “arms,” while on the other side there were televisions. You had to see it. Hopefully we will be asked to do more there.

They seemed to like us.

This weekend was hellish. I don’t think I want to stay awake any more. Could someone please make it stop! Back to the Future! Yeah. This is being written Fri. so I’m gonna hope that by Tuesday we made money on this film. Anyone sick o f them yet?

We’re all getting psyched up for Quadfest!

Steve is putting together a list o f people who will be working the event and their positions. If you'd like to be involved and get a super nifty ID badge, e-mail him. He’ll be more than happy to put you on the list. We’re also having our fall picnic after strike. If you want to come, you must help strike everything off the Quad first. Otherwise we’ll put you in our new tower roadcases. Yes! we have them! We can’t open them, but we have them.

The snake is back, too. See you all Wed. at 4:30 in AK 233, or Mon. in Forkey Conference Room (Harrington - it's really cool in there) at 4:30.

Keep the sanity...

R u g b y

S c ie n c e M a s q u e

324 Grove St, Wore.

(Across from Jillion's) Tel: 752-5510

C lu b

President Elect Ryan Abraham announced that he as appointed the following as senior advisors to the Newman Club for next year: Becky Prince, Debbie Foley, Joe Ackermann, Jeff Tenney, Su­ san Roosa, Tom Hart, John Digiacomo, Roger Roy and Jim Palvat. Chairpersons of the various committees will be announced next week. Our

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Last weekennd’s Star Wars LARP was a riot­ ous success. All weekend the wedge was filled with people role-playing, getting shot, running around, and generally having a grand old time.

The Grand Moffs did an excellent job - congratu­ lations!

Soon, you may notice many people on cam­ pus looking over their shoulders and around cor­ ners every now and then. Some people are just normally paranoid, but many will be playing the game off Assassin. If you want to join in the intrigue, email bjh@wpi.edu.

President Mike G. is collecting a list of WPISFS alumni. If you know where any are, email him at mpgalvin@wpi.edu.

Coming up in mid-April, an activities fair of some sort will be held for possible freshmen. All sfs members are welcome to help give them a good impression of the coolest group on campus - the WPI SFS, which meets Wednesdays 7 pm in Olin Hall rm. 107.

Well, not much has been going on this week... so this will be really short. Listen everyone! Send me mail... fun things that happened to you during the week. I will (probably) put your story in the club comer in addition to the regular comer news.

I feel obligated to put something in Newspeak every week, even when there are weeks that nothing exciting is going on. So, come on Kenny!

Send me some of your stories! That’s all for now.

-Jed

N e w m a n

C lu b

Hey Ruggers, time for another spring sea­ son. We opened up the spring on March 23rd against Coast Guard. The battle was hard fought with Coast Guard taking a 7-0 lead late in the first half. We came storming back as Donny took the leather through all fifteen defenders for his first try. Donny you ow e us a dance!

After that a few tackling errors led to a couple of Coast Guard tries which put the game out o f reach. The B side game was well played with numerous rookies playing hard. Special thanks to Sam and Eric the Red (socks and face) for keeping us in the game. George’s head is still ringing and the Jester is replacing Tom as the “B” side hooker. The Muff-Diver is back and Gates is not (big surprise huh?). There is a game today versus Worcester State and a game Satur­ day versus Wentworth. All ruggers must get their voices in shape... “Who can take an elec­ tric telephone generator...” Hope to see every­ one today and Saturday showing their school spirit. Ball is Good!! Buddha out!

Open until 9:00pm on Wednesday!

By Appt. or Walk-in Hours: Tue, Thu, Fri, Sat: 7:00am - 6:00pm Wed: 7:00am - 9:00pm Closed Sunday and Monday

Learning

current President, Becky Prince, announced that the trip lo Wright’s Chicken Farm will be on Friday, April 12th and is limited to the first forty people that sign up. Cost for the trip and meal is $5.00. Please e-mail bprince@wpi or priest@wpi if you want to sign up. It is being done on a first come,first serve basis. Becky also announced that the Newman Club will sponsor a Sunday Liturgy on Family Day at 5:15pm in the Lower Wedge for the convenience of those families that will be here that weekend. The Club will also have its two usual Sunday Masses on that weekend.

crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples: ‘He has risen from the dead and is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him.’ Now I have told you.’” Matthew 28:2-7 (NIV).

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Page 9

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G reek C orn er ATA good day everyone! Happy April! first off the birthday shout-outs, happy belated birth­ day to Kat “the gangsta” and happy early birth­ day to Wendy (the 6th)! A big hug goes out to LambdaChi. we love you guys! Tothe seniors, w e’ll miss you guys don’t disappear on us. thanks to sac for the great social, did we all have fun at the formal? good, kudos to Amy and her committee! don’t forget to show up for your composite pictures today, good luck to all the new officers! intramurals rock, don’t worry w e’ll win a game soon, i hope. MVP's of the week: for floor hockey: Ange (the goalie!) for soccer: Wendy (you go girl), watch out zeta psi and ato w e’re coming for you! April Fools?! sorry boys we had been too good for too long, good luck to our softball players, track runner, and crew rowers, have a great season, deb and amy have fun at TLC. thanks to that cheesy dude for returning our doorknob, even though he was the one who stole it! hats off to the old spirit hat! in with the new. everyone get psyched for the teeter totter-a-thon! “can” jodi do a good job? we know she “can”! until next time...adoveling!

A T Q

Congrats to the lucky women o f PK and Hammond. Because o f their generosity to the house we had a tourney. A tourney that was made by the man doing the pinning. O f course there is always a cool guy in the crowd. Quote: “Since you made the chart. Team Feta has to be number one.” Yo Justin, it’s all good. Peace.

The neophyte, Woodrow made a very strong appearance. Don’t let it get to yourhead, I’ll be the First one to pop it. Chad made a strong showing that night. Brendan, I’m doing a gene therapy project I want to extract some DN A and try to correct what ever is missing. No really I’m serious. Jake on the fooz ball floor: Oh noooooooooooooo. Fresh, Croquet's. Hey Donnie, how was the movie? Wilkie what's the definition o f tool. This past party the patrol team o f Gobi one, Goudrcau, Swifty, Me, and captain Weed took it to a whole new level. !@#$ the dumb, you the know rest. (Greek)

A X P

D term is in full effect. Oh, lets see, so far every day some brother has been stumbling around the house completely wrecked. Now, most recently, was Kev who learned a few more ways on how to spell Acupuko. Undercover agents even spotted Krusty’s stunt double floun­ dering around with an ear to ear grin. The parly ended up being the best one o f the year so far.

Say did Poppish say he met agirl (who knew?)?!

What happened to our intramurals: I believe we won in soccer, hockey, and softball. Hey, I heard about a new sport from New Jersey -

“Dunking Heads for House Jobs” (ask Pete “Swirly” W ysocki for details). A pre-Fourth o f July celebration was performed in honor o f American Pride (in beer). The end is near - Lino moved a few times this week.

Coming down this past weekend were a few UMass Bros. And, ironically goingupthis week­ end to UMass were a few DSPhi Bros. Now, I, I, I’m confused. Tell someone not to let Foster plan any more road trips.

Theo-o-o-o-o!!! Hail KingTurd(l think that’s a compliment). Easter is near - Hey is th GOB still open for business, 1know Andy is interested in a reunion. Yup, Shur-re.

Did it really take you ten weeks Andrus, truthfully? Oh boy, another stellar ending, hasta: TRICK

Blam! AT&T goes shatter in the night. Hello all you Madmen, feeling sciencedout? Too bad Goddard wasn’t around. He would have enjoyed himself. Hope you had a great April Fool’s day.

Smasssshhh!

Happy 20th Ollie! Time to keep up the good work at getting the puck in the goal vs. AGD tonight at 9pm. Fred & Rob it’s time to do your duty again vs. Kapp on Thurs. Come all you soccerites to the field to cheer on the team vs.

Theta Chi. Remember 18 days till our 20th, the day when Zetedom will once more rejoice. Have a hip-hoppity Easier. -Fisch

0X Well, have some tolerance and beer with me here. It’s my first try at this and that’s the truth.

Some old news, the Mardi Gras party kicked a little ash. I just wanted to lick’em! Any chance getting beads for every party? Writing this article in advance, here are some predictions for the graffiti party, 1)DeLousa passes out in the commons and someone lends a little helping hand and shaves that ratnest off the top of his head. 2)Gill, without opening his mouth goes nuts with the markers and charms the ladies silly, he ends up hooking up wilh more women than Plutoris. And finally, 3)Sudden explosion in the boiler room, any ideas? Anyways, Mojo and Manny thought they were Lewis and Clark and led LeClair and Hubbs on a fantastic voy­ age. Speaking o f LeClair, what’s the streak up to? you better get to bed you've got a big day o f drinking and beating the Phuck out o f the house tomorrow. Congrats to all the new Junior Execs, in the guard position, I looked at the 2nd guard and thought Couchu was in the hizou. Hey guys, lock the door so Father breaking-and-entering doesn’t pull any more surprise visits huh? You guys better all start scraping together your change, let’s bring Sev back! Speaking of our superphat cup quest, soccer? floor-hockey? damn we’re good! By the way, what the hell’s in that brain sauce DiBiase? If Rupp and LeClair keep

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receiving their free samples o f wallpaper that start something like “W e appreciate your inter­ est, but...” we could have this house covered pretty damn soon. Last but by far not least, Once again Dupont, you’ve done the crime, but this time it’ll be you and not our marine doin the time, You should be ashamed, you’re a disgrace you freakin pig, oink oink. See all o f you in court bizzatches. I’m out.

A X A

W elcome to the new and improved LCA greek comer. I would first like to congratulate two brothers, Jeff Bayko and Dennis Hubbard.

Jeff was named a Charles O’Thompson scholar and “Stew” was nominated by Tau Beta Pi for the sophomore o f the year. Way to go guys! I would also like to congratulate brother Reardon for being elected to the position o f High Phi and thank him and many others for their excep­ tional improvements on the house. Good luck to Gepctto and Plaid Donut at the APO dancea-thon. This past week intramurals went well.

The floor hockey team won easily and the soccer team should have won. You guys played your guts out! Be sure not to miss the scavenger hunt when quadfest com es around. The Lambda Chi team has done a great job with that. Hope­ fully we will have som e fun this weekend at camp Marshall for our retreat. That is o f course if we don’t freeze to death first. We might actually get some sleep too. There are no fire alarms there, right? W ell, gotta go, this is Feets signing off. GO KENTUCKY!!

T K E

(B eep, Bop, BOOP, beep, boop, beep) Dinkateus here with what’s happening at the most kickin’ place on campus. First of all, I hope you all liked my little fortune telling about the pondings last week. Froggie and Dools finally decided to get a little extra exercise by swimming a few laps. Congrats to all the New Bros. Just ‘cause it’s over doesn’t mean you should let up. Keep up the pride and let’s end the yearof with a bang. I've been reminded that I forgot to thank some people, last week, thanx to all the till’ Sisters for the breakfast, il was much appreciated. Random, that was the only way to describe the party last weekend, but it did kick. Never Use My Spoon Cause U Love Lesbians. 1guess I would have to agree with the little four-leaf-clover lovin man. I see Spam has his motorcycle up again. Not it for when someone is going to have to scrape him of the asphalt. Someone is trying to piss me off, I want my lunch table back... Well I’m starting to run out o f things to say, so I guess it’s time to give you all the top five list. Top five reasons why PQP bites the sack. 5) I don’t have any lime and I want to go to bed. 4) It’d be nice to talk to som eone who could speak English. 3) Having your advisor crap on you ever other

day. 2) Damn night classes. 1) This isn’t even the real work. SEE YA. TKE PRIDE

F I J I

Well, while the boyz are away in England, I’m afraid I have to take over the comer. Like everything else in the house, no one wants to do it so a senior must take control o f the situation.

Besides, we all know who is the best, right? The first act as “greek comer” chairman is to create new weekly prizes. The first is “Minko o f the week:” This outstanding prize goes to an idi vidual who does nothing for the house (things like wait-ons and philanthropy sign-up). For an award, the winner gets a really RAD skate­ board!! !! The next is the “sour house managers o f the week award:” This goes to an individual that cannot take remarks and criticism without taking it personal. For their toubles, these indi­ viduals receive an extra tall glass o f sour lemon­ ade. I’m sure they will work on it. The next award is the gove o f the week award. This award goes to to the individual who logs the most amount o f miles on his car to see his girlfriend.

For his troubles, he receives a frequent flier card which he can use to receive free lovin’, like everyone else who journey’s to this place.

Enough is enough, but before I go, a little birdy from England flew over and gave this note: Swammi sayz- what you do in traffic, what the ass needs to get rid of his gut, yeah minko sure you’re not one .... Mergin’, a surgeon, and a virgin. Swammi Sayz- Breakfast dish, what you use in the library, andback around Simpson’s neck.... Kieche, microfiche and a leash. Swammi sayz- What the FIJI boyz are because Harrod is not here to write the greek comer. Seal’s haircut, and Why Banks was a liveout C-Term. Until next time boyz and Girls. Oh by the way. Who’s in first place for the Cup!!!

<DK0 It’s getting to be the time o f year now, so the Falk walch has been placed in full effect, bui I’ve got a feeling that he’s going to make il this year. I’m proud to say that the house has won this years national Phi Kappa Theta award for housepride. CongraisPhi Kaps!!! Also,congrats to Brother Bolduc for being a founding member, o f Phi Kappa Woodside, good luck to him and all of his endevours next year. Hey Pol in, You’ve got ring around the finger!! The HMC is trying to organize a fund raiser for homeless children. By the way, Roses are red, violets are blue, the giant has a woman, and all the brothers do too!!! The explorers club is planning another journey for next week. Who knows what dis­ gusting creatures they might find....maybe a Colby. Cui’s Comer: A fool speak many words but rice go good with soy sauce.

ITB Total Package P.S. Neiland, did you find the paint, yet.

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T u e s d a y , A pr il 2 , 1 9 9 6

Pag e l l

N ewspeak

C l a s s if ie d s Check out the WPIR Schedule on page 4 of this paper. And, don’t forget to check out WPIR on Cable Channel 38 or 9 0 .1 FM Cable.

Get involved with this year’s Quadfest, to be held on Saturday, April 27th. Meetings are held on Thursdays in the Goat’s Head Conference Room (Riley Hall, Alden Side) at 4:30pm.

The new SGA execs, take over during the April 2nd meeting. Go to the Lower Wedge at 6:00pm to see!

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Newspeak will run classifieds free for all WPI students, faculty, and staff Free classifieds are limited to six (6) lines Ads of n a commercial nature and ads longer than six lines must be paid for at the off campus/commercial rate ol $5 00 for the first six lines and 50 cents per additional line.

Classified ads must be paid for in advance.

No information which, in the opinion of the Newspeak editors, would identify an individual to the community will be printed in a personal ad The editors reserve the right to refuse any ad deemed to be in bad taste or many ads from one group or individual on one subject.

The deadline for ads is noon on the Friday before publication.

AH classified ads must be on individual sheets of paper and must be accompanied by the writer's name, address and phone number.

Great job men’s varsity and novice crew for winning the races last Saturday!

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N ewspeak

P a g e 12

P o l ic e L o g T hursday, March 21 7:30am - Found property: from Gompei’s personnel, a book bag was found and student was emailed.

9:45am - Possible sighting o f assault suspect, subject not found.

3:33pm - Assist: Nonstudents removed from Institute parking lot.

4:03pm - Noise complaint: Founders loading dock.

5:30pm - Assist. Remove non-students from Harrington and Alumni.

6:30pm - Suspicious person: near 8 Boynton St. 8:30pm - Intrusion Alarm: Fuller CCC, Programming area, set o ff by custodian.

What's Happening

£

Tuesday, April 2 6:00pm - SGA Meeting, Lower Wedge.

8:00pm - Coffeehouse: “Minus Ted,” Riley Commons. $1/3/5.

Friday, M arch 22 12:50am - Suspicious activity: Report o f table being transported from Daniels to Riley.

6:17am - Intrusion alarm: Vibrations Lab. 1:35pm - Turned in: female wallet, turned over to WPD. 3:20pm - Report: Disturbance on the baseball fields.

3:39pm - Access: President’s house for Plant Services.

4:54pm - Plant Services: Prof. in Goddard called to inform Plant Services that there was a leak in the third floor men’s bathroom.

4:55pm - Assist: Coach called for assistance in removing youths from the playing turn while game is in session.

8:43pm - Medical Emergency: Daniels 4th floor WPI EMS, WFD, WEMS.

W ednesday, April 3 11:00am - Department o f Chemistry Colloquium: “Regioselective Enzymatic Deacylation o f Sucrose Perestcrs in Organic Solvents,” Goddard Hall 227.

Thursday, April 4 4:30pm - Quadfest Meeting, Goat’s Head Conference Room.

Friday, April 5

Good Friday 8:00pm - Concert: “Guster!,” Riley Commons. $3/5.

Saturday, A pril 6 4:30pm - Protestant Worship Service, Morgan Dining A.

Saturday, M arch 23 2:42am - Suspicious Vehicle: 1 Drury Lane.

3:46pm - Suspicious persons: 30-40 yo males in wedge.

8:38pm - Report: from student, left his jacket in wedge with his passport.

8:50pm - Report: Jacket found, student notified.

11:29pm - Noise Complaint: Report o f loud party at Salisbury Estates.

Sunday, April 7

Easter Sunday & Daylight Savings Begins

Sunday, M arch 24 12:12am - Assist / alcohol complaint: WPD requests assist at 11 Boynton St. re: anonymous report of underage persons being served alcohol.

12:40am - Noise Complaint: Founders Hall, loud music.

12:5 lam - Noise Complaint: Founders Hall, loud music.

1:06am - Noise Complaint: Founders Hall, loud music.

1:5lam - Medical response: Daniels, intoxicated student, irregular breathing.

2:13am - Disorderly persons: Complaint from 10 Regent St. of two subjects attempting lo gain entry to house.

2:42am - Medical Response: Daniels, intoxicated student, irregular breathing.

2:50am - EMS requests ambulance to Daniels Hall.

5:05pm - Wallet Found: Wallet found on campus and turned in to station.

11:42pm - Possible missing person: Riley, Officer responds.

11:30am - Catholic Mass, Alden Memorial.

2:00pm - Film: “Toy Story,” Perreault Hall. $1 Matinee.

6:00pm - Catholic Mass, Founder’s Study Room.

6:30pm & 9:30pm - Film: “Toy Story,” Perreault Hall. $2.

7:1 lam - Alarm: Higgins Labs, Vibrations.

10:48am - Alarm: Fire / Sprinkler, set o ff alarm accidental.

4:04pm - Access: Person needing access to coffee shop in Salisbury.

5:50pm - Lockout: Red Chrysler New Yorker outside o f Res. Life.

7:48pm - Assist: MV jumpstart in Library lot.

7:50pm - Assist: 911 hangup in Founders basement.

9:59pm - Assist: Turn on lights at football field.

11:26pm - Safety Hazard: Report o f several ladders laying on floor in east basement hallway of Riley obstructing exit to Riley Commons.

W ednesday, M arch 27 12:18am - Noise Complaint: Loud music, 26 Institute Road.

1:45pm - WPD: 911 called the station because o f a hang up call received from WPI campus. Call was from a trunk line, situation clear with switchboard operator.

2:20pm - Re 1:45: Switchboard located room; call was made from officer sent to investigate.

5:08pm - Graffiti: Reported on Field House.

5:20pm - Suspicious Object: Large bottle on steps o f 24 Trowbridge.

5:51pm - Assist: Officers requested to Fuller apartment because o f disruptive male resident.

6:07pm - Notify: Officer requests administrator on call for assistance at Fuller apartment.

6:34pm - WPD: WPD called in to assist at Fuller apartment.

8:07pm - Medical: Female victim with sprained knee in Harrington Auditorium, EMS responding.

M onday, M arch 25 4:13pm - Fire Alarm: AK 2nd floor local alarm.

6:57pm - Tresspassing: Alumni, Officer responds.

8:40pm - Suspicious Person: Institute Road, Officers respond.

9:30pm - Medical: Football field, hand injury; EMS. 9:53pm - Intrusion Alarm: AK 320C. T uesday, M arch 26 1:37am - Assist / Distraught Student: Officer assisting WPD at Fuller Apartments regarding report o f distraught student.

5:36am - Assist: Air Force ROTC admitted to Alumni Gym.

C a tc h th e W a v e ! a t

A c a p p e lla fe s t 2 Sat, April 13, 7 :3 0 pm R iley C om m ons WPI $ 2 F o r

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