THE DIME ROBBERY

By River

On November 19, 2020, a place called The Dime got robbed by Captain Underpants. The Dime owed him some money, and Captain was done waiting for it.

I was working my bartender shift at The Dime that night when Captain ran in yelling, saying, “GIVE ME MY MONEY!” I said, “What money? Who are you?” and he said, “I am Captain Underpants and I want my money.” Then he pulled at his underpants, threatening, “If you don’t give me my money I will wedgie you with my underpants.” At this point I felt so lost about what was happening, but, personally, I was not going to take that. So I got up and called the cops and he got arrested for attempted robbery. He went to jail for a long time.

But, one day, Captain Underpants broke out and started planning his revenge. He was going to break into The Dime and take the money for good. He needed the money to buy lots of underwear and capes. When he broke in he tried to teach me a lesson, but he failed to teach me any lesson. I know how to defend myself, and now, while Captain Underpants may have wanted revenge on The Dime, he can’t have it, because he died in jail.

Today, people say that Captain Underpants has been haunting The Dime ever since. Good try, Captain. Maybe you’ll get me next time.