February 23, 2011
Opinion
5
Hopelessly searching for a cure for Senioritis Senioritis (noun): A crippling disease that strikes high school seniors. Sy m p t o m s include: laziness, an over-excessive wearing of [Xavier quarter-zip fleeces]. Also features a lack of studying, repeated absences, and a generally dismissive attitude. The only known cure is a phenomenon known as Graduation. Urban Dictionary— edited for dress code purposes. Many people believe that senioritis is just a myth or excuse that seniors make up for not doing their school work. Students of Xavier High School: I tell you, this
is a serious medical condition. As a senior suffering from this horrible ailment, I am writing, no, pleading to you, my fellow peers, to raise awareness for senioritis. I find myself waking up and having to force myself to drive to school, for the sake of my healthier, non-infected freshman sister. I have symptoms of fatigue and a short attention span in every single class. I can no longer find a reason to go on… doing homework or studying. This illness has brought upon tragic misfortunes to those around me: my teachers can no longer keep my attention; my parents cannot even ask me if I have homework. Please, donate just a dollar a day to help find a cure for senioritis. All donations can be
“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Almost everyone has been asked this question as a young child, but back then, the question was fun and easy to answer. You could say anything. A ballerina, an actor, a fireman, a belly dancer, or even a superhero and the response would almost always be “That’s very nice!” or “Sounds like fun!” Except now when you answer the same question you get flooded with more questions that can leave you confused or unsure. When you reply to an adult who has asked you what your future
plans are, they may nod their head and smile, but what they are really thinking is written all over their face. “You want to do that?!” and “That is so impractical!” It becomes even more clear as to what they are thinking when they begin hammering you with intense questions. Suddenly they seem so interested as to where you will be living or how many kids you are planning to have. You receive a harsher reply if you simply answer, “I’m not sure what I want to do yet.” Almost every adult seems to think we need to decide right this moment what we want to do for the rest of our lives. Why are we all so pressured to know where we will be at age 35? I am not sure what my exact
Senior Amber Burns shows her frustration with school in the hallways. Cassie Busch photo. dropped off at locker number 568. If every one of you reading this article gives a dollar a day, we will soon have enough money to pay for my college educa—er… I mean research to find a cure.
Pursuit of Happiness
profession will be, how many kids I will have, or where I will be living, but I do know I want to be happy. Isn’t that what matters? If you are happy at age 50 scanning groceries at the nearest Wal-Mart, then it should not matter if that job seems impractical to others. You should be living your life for you. The next time someone asks you what you want to be when you are older, and you’re unsure what to say, simply state, “I want to be happy.” Because that is something we are all sure of. CJ Lampe Opinion Writer
Meaning behind ‘man’s best friend’ Have you ever considered taking your dog to prom? Do you have a giant quilt with your favorite pet’s face plastered all over it? Do you sometimes wish you could be just like Eliza Thornberry and gossip with your dog about which neighborhood dog is pooping in whose lawn this week instead of hanging out with your friends? If any of these questions apply to you, then boy do I have a treat for you! (No, my fellow animal readers, not a literal treat). Studies have shown that hanging out with your pet more is actually better than hanging out with your friends more. Yay being antisocial! An obvious reason why pets are better than friends is that they can’t talk. Think about all those
times you felt guilty using the handicap door in a public building or got a stain on the carpet that you can’t explain. Guess what? You have someone to tell who won’t rat on you to your parents, your teachers, or your friends. Your loyal companion is in it until death and that whiskered snout isn’t telling a soul that you took that really cute shirt from your friend’s house, paw promise. Whenever you come home, what little creature is always ready to welcome you on all fours? That’s right, your pet. Now, your fellow human friends may be thinking “hey, that’s not fair they live in the same house! I’m not going to constantly be at their home 24/7.” Fair enough, however, would you give up your pet just so you could have your best friend come stay live with you all the time? No? Exactly. When you have a bad day, who’s always there to cuddle up to
you and offer their fur as a tissue? Almost half of pet owners say their canine friend is more likely to “notice” they’ve had a bad day than their best human friend. Your furry friend is always there to help you through hardships and watch as you angrily storm around the house. He knows when something’s wrong and is always there to offer you a neon tennis ball and a big sloppy kiss- yet another reason why pets triumph human friends. The saying goes “there are friends, there are best friends, and then there are pet friends.” So whenever you’re considering whose shoulder to cry on, turn to the cutest fur ball in your life and let the tears fly.
Meghann Gates Opinion Writer
Disclaimer: there is no actual medical evidence of senioritis (yet) and my grades are the best they’ve ever been.
Mandie Kimbro Opinion Writer
Tearjerking Movies 1. Marley & Me 2. The Notebook 3. My Sister’s Keeper 4. The Vow 5. Titanic 6. Old Yeller 7. A Walk to Remember 8. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close 9. Letters to God 10. Time Traveler’s Wife