Absolutely Mama November 2018 by ABSOLUTELY Magazines

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Mother

KIND The Magazine for Stylish Mums

Zoe Blaskey on her fab parent support platform

Time to shine Glam maternity looks for this season’s parties

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Hard

LABOUR

The first in a series of real-life birth stories

GOING SOLO The highs and lows of being a single mum

THE MAGAZINE FOR ST YLISH MUMS 05/10/2018 12:38

bugaboo classic collection a true classic never goes out of style

The Bugaboo Bee5 Classic is available from June 2018 from Bugaboo.com The Bugaboo Bee5 Classic in Dark Navy is available from June 2018 exclusively at John Lewis & Bugaboo.com The Bugaboo Fox and Bugaboo Donkey2 Classics will be available from September 2018 from Bugaboo.com ÂŠ copyright Bugaboo International BV

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SCAN WITH LAYAR TO WATCH VIDEO

A luxury children’s footwear brand with an award-winning collection of lightweight shoes, sandals and boots for both boys and girls from baby to toddler to junior.

YOUNGSOLES.CO.UK

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mama WELCOME

contents N OV E M B E R 2 01 8

40 76

50 16

AGENDA Mama Loves

32 Hard Labour

New Books

FASHION 42 Shine On

On the wishlist this November

Fab, fresh reads for little ones

ESSENTIALS 22 Babe Watch

Best buys for babies and toddlers

MAMAHOOD 27 Insta-Mama

Th e Unmumsy Mum chats babies, books and blogging

29 Mother Kind

Zoe Blaskey on improved self-care for new mums

ON THE COVER: Gisele Dress, £125 Shop the Collection at seraphine.com

Telling It Like It Is

Alex Hunter on single parenting

Jess Bowen aka Model Mother shares her birth story

Feel festively fabulous in new party pieces from Seraphine

50 Folk Tales

Delicate embroidery and natural tones from new Apolina Kids

WELLNESS 62 Good Cooking

Model and TV chef Lorraine Pascale on the myths of “eating for two”

67 Mind Matters

Sheryl Franklin speaks up about prenatal depression

HOME & INTERIORS 78 Sian Zeng Home Tour Th e queen of children’s wallpaper shows us around her penthouse apartment

87 Mood Board

Cassandra Rhodin of Mini Rodini shares her interior inspirations

TRAVEL 94 Heaven Sent

Th e ultimate family-friendly stay on the Greek island of Crete

98 ... And relax

Th e mums-only holiday destinations you need to know

RESOURCES 110 Screen Time

Th e pros and cons of going digital

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mama WELCOME SIAN ZENG WALLPAPER P. 78

Editor’s

LETTER

BOOKS WE LOVE P. 18

APOLINA KIDSWEAR P.52

n this month’s issue, we’re talking about self-care. As mums we can get so caught up in looking after others that we neglect ourselves. One mama putting this to rights is Zoe Blaskey. She set up Motherkind as a supportive platform to spread the word about the importance of self-care and the positive effects it can have on postnatal mental health. It’s a sentiment that’s echoed in Sheryl Franklin’s account of how a more holistic approach to life helped her through a challenging transition to motherhood. Her wellness mama retreats build on what she’s learned so far in her journey, to support those struggling with prenatal depression. I discovered mum-blogger Jess Bowen (aka Model Mother) through Instagram a couple of years ago now – our daughters are the same age and share the same curly blonde locks. Drawn to her beautiful (but not overwrought or overstyled) images and pithy turn of phrase, I thought she articulated the motherhood experience beautifully. I’d been wanting to run a birth story for a long time and knew that Jess would do an excellent job of communicating the nuances of her experience with the requisite honesty and depth of feeling. I’m beyond thrilled that she agreed to share it with us. Lastly, an honourable mention to our columnist Alex Hunter. She’s a single parent and therefore my hero. A hero to us all. She shares her experience of going solo.

OEUF NYC P. 50

Hel en Ba r on E DITOR

@hel_bow helen.baron@zest-media.com

T h e M a g a z i n e Fo r S t y l i s h M u m s

Senior Designer: PAWEL KUBA Mid-weight Designer: REBECCA NOONAN Designer: CATHERINE PERKINS Finance Director: JERRIE KOLECI Director: ROCHELLE STREATER Managing Director: SHERIF SHALTOUT

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LON DON OFFICE : 197-199 City Road, London EC1V 1JN, UK

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absolutely-mama .co.uk Group Editor: KATY GILLETT Editor UK: HELEN BARON Assistant Editor: GEORGIA MCVEIGH Social Media Editor: JESSICA SHALTOUT Specialist Manager: ZARINA KAPASI Parenting Portfolio Manager: LEAH DAY Marketing Manager: LUCIE PEARCE Art Director: PHIL COUZENS

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Zest Media Publications Ltd. cannot accept responsibility for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts and photographs. While every care is taken, prices and details are subject to change and Zest Media Publications Ltd. take no responsibility for omissions or errors. We reserve the right to publish and edit any letters. All rights reserved.

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10 things we Absolutely

LOV E Our round-up of the best styles and products for you and your home

Perfect Fit

Boob Des ig n These maternity trousers are a marvel. Their clever design means they slip easily over your tummy while fitting like a regular pair of trousers below the bump. A flattering look that’ll last you into the third trimester and beyond. £74.99; boobdesign.com

LEATHER HEAD

Ar ran Fra n ces Classic in style but progressive of mind, the Iona bag from Arran Frances embodies elegance and timeless beauty while fully embracing modernity. £545; arranfrances.com

WHITE NIGHT

Cyberjammies The world’s first online-only pyjama brand has a strong selection of nightwear to see you through cosy autumn evenings, not least this elegant nightdress in white woven jacquard cotton. Almost makes you thankful for that nip in the air... almost. Evelyn nightdress, £38; cyberjammies.co.uk

BU BBL ING U P

B ub b l e This clever app enlists your social media networks to help you find reliable babysitters. All sitters are background and ID-checked and by using code ‘ABSOLUTELY’ you can get £10 off your first booking. Search ‘Bubble’ in your phone’s app store to download; joinbubble.com

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ma m a LOVES

GO GREEN

Fra n k G re e n Join the plastic-free revolution with these stylish, reusable bottles and cups from Frank Green. The stainless steel range is thermo-engineered to keep cold drinks cold and hot drinks hot, and they’re available in a range of cool colours and feature an easy-grip design. £29.99; frankgreen.com

Dreamy Days

Da nye l l e This daybed ticks every style box with its Nordic design, soft linen mattress and vintage-inspired, hand-crafted rattan frame. It’s an ideal piece for a quiet corner – or place it at the foot of your bed for littles to lounge on as you get ready for the day. £1,410; outthereinteriors.com

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URBAN CH IC

B o n o rd i c Carrying a selection of Scandinavian kidswear, nursery and home brands, Bonordic is at the forefront of just about everything we’re into right now. Check out the store – we love the sustainably made toys from Stories in Structures – if you don’t believe us. bonordic.co.uk

Horse Around

Ma ma s & Pa pa s The classic unicorn is white, the corny contemporary variant is rainbow-hued – but only a Mamas and Papas rocking unicorn would think to adorn itself in such a pretty print. A nice twist on tradition for modern mamas and their babes. £99; mamasandpapas.com

Birthday Party

Mol o Danish brand Molo marks 15 years at the leading edge of kidswear with a colourful capsule collection of tees, totes, sweats and caps. Each piece features the slogan “Time to be present”, encouraging littles to look up from their screens – advice we happily endorse. molo.com

L IP SERV IC E

Bali Balm Harnessing the goodness of three essential oils – coconut, castor and kukui nut – this luxury vegan lip balm is kind to the planet and lovely to your lips. It even comes with a prepaid envelope so you can return the empty tube to the company when finished. £20; balibalm.com

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Go Places, Big and Small. Designed for your daily adventures and exciting excursions, the MINU offers modern conveniences in a portable, lightweight stroller. Go where you want, how you want â&#x20AC;&#x201C; thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nothing extra holding you back.

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Frozen Fever

• SK ATE AT SOMERSET HOUSE •

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas... and though there’s still ample time for all the other preparations, now is the ideal moment to book your slot at Somerset House for the capital’s favourite ice-skating extravaganza. Youngsters will love the ambience as much as the activity; we recommend visiting of an evening, when the lights and decorations are sure to impress. somersethouse.org.uk

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W H AT ’ S ON Fill your Christmas calendar before the best stuff gets booked, and say hello to Disney on Ice’s newest star

3 FA M I LY P E R FO R M A N C E S On the menu this month: kids classics and family-friendly jazz

The Snowman 22 November- 6 January 2019 The Peacock Theatre

The classic tale returns in a performance that matches Raymond Briggs’ sublime storytelling with spellbinding music and dance. Kids as young as three will love the festive cheer. peacocktheatre.com

Shrek Until 6 January Various venues

There are a couple of months left before this national tour draws to a close. Join Shrek, Donkey and all the oddballs from the classic film in a rip-roaring musical. shrekthemusical.co.uk

Book Ahead

The Wonderful World of

Disney on Ice 13 March-23 April 2019  Nationwide

It’s worth getting in early for this one as tickets are likely to sell fast. The next Disney on Ice tour will see over 50 (!) beloved characters take to the ice in a musical spectacular. And for the first time, Dory – the forgetful fish from the Finding Nemo series – will take audiences on a spellbinding dive into the deep... disneyonice.com

Family Jazz 25 November Blackheath Conservatoire

Listen to some of the best jazz musicians in the world in the beautiful surroundings of Blackheath’s Conservatoire studios. Inspiring fun for the entire family. conservatoire.org.uk

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EVENTS

Christmas at Beaulieu 23 November- 30 December Beaulieu Abbey

Christmas at Beaulieu promises to be little short of enchanting, with a scented fi re garden, icicle walk, singing trees and show-stopping light displays turning the estate into a veritable winter wonderland. And that’s before you’ve even enjoyed the seasonal refreshments and met Father Christmas himself… beaulieu.co.uk

ROOM ON THE

BROOM

23 November-13 January Lyric Theatre

Fireworks

witch on a broomstick goes for a ride with her hat on her head and her cat at her side. She picks up a bird and a hitchhiking frog, then offers a lift to a wayfaring dog. But the broom is slender – not strong and stout – and to make matters worse there’s a dragon about... What happens next? Will our heroes survive? This award-winning show brings the story alive. nimaxtheatres.com

20 -21 & 26-27 October & 2 November Legoland

egoland is throwing quite a party to mark Bonfi re Night this year, with a spectacular Lego-themed display that will tie in with their Halloween celebrations. Expect giant spooky minifigures, lots of Lego pumpkins and fi reworks that, when viewed through 3D glasses, transform from showers of sparks into colourful fl ying blocks. legoland.co.uk

3 Christmas Warm-ups

C H R I STM A S CA R N I VA L 21-25 November Waddesdon Manor, Bucks

Kickstart your Christmas with a family road-trip to Waddesdon Manor, where, for five days this November, there’ll be a Christmas carnival complete with hot chocolate, letters to Santa, lots of fairy lights and special events. waddesdon.org.uk

FATH E R C H R I STM A S AT TH E H A LL 22 November-22 December Royal Albert Hall

The Santa experience to end them all, taking little ones on an hour-long journey to Saint Nick’s secret London HQ. There will be snow, fairies and a gift from the man himself. royalalberthall.com

F I N D I N G SA NTA

14 November-24 December Little Angel Theatre

This interactive show sees the audience shaping the course of the story. Discover how each letter to Santa finds its way across thousands of miles to his North Pole home – and enjoy some fine festive puppetry. littleangeltheatre.com

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We love

BOOKS

Literary dragons, runaway notes and two oceanic adventures in this month’s best new books Wo r d s H E L E N BA RO N

PAGE TURNER F R A N K L I N ’ S F LY I N G B O O K S H O P By Jen Campbell

It’s not every day you meet protagonists as delightful as Franklin, a well-read dragon, and Luna, the bookworm who bravely becomes his friend. This is a fairytale for the modern age, with enchanting illustrations and words that keep you reading. Imagine! £11.95;  thamesandhudson.com

WILD BEASTS A N I M O S A I C S . . . C A N YO U F I N D I T ? By Surya Sajnani

Tinies learning their first words will love this bright, beautiful board book, which features colour-themed pages teeming with animals and objects hidden among mosaic-inspired designs. £9.99; quartoknows.com

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agen d a

BOOKS

OCEAN VIEW THE BIG BOOK OF THE BLUE By Yuval Zommer

The Big Book of the Blue is an encyclopedic survey of ocean life as seen through the lens of one of the foremost children’s illustrators today. It features sharks, whales and all manner of marine trivia. Set sail for discovery... £12.95;  thamesandhudson.com

SONG OF TH E C IT Y

N E W YO R K M E LO DY By Hélène Druvert

SEA LIFE I NTO TH E OCEAN By Laura Baker and Nadia Taylor

Join a young turtle as he plays hide and seek with his friends beneath the waves, encountering some of the sea’s most colourful and characterful denizens along the way. £9.99;  quartoknows.com

IN A NUTSHELL I A M T H E S E E D T H AT G R E W T H E T R E E By Fiona Waters and Frann Preston-Gannon

This anthology of amazing nature poems, specially selected to inspire youngsters, has been illustrated by the talented Frann Preston-Gannon. It’s packed full of wildlife and wonder, and is a lovely keepsake that’s great fun to read together as the season’s change. £25;  nosycrow.com

As the concert begins, a single note leaps free of the sheet music and drifts away to discover the delights of New York City. Littles will love this new tale from the acclaimed author and designer, beautifully realised in intricate illustrations and delicate lasercuts. £16.95;  thamesandhudson.com

A RT S C H O O L A H I STORY OF PICTU R E S FOR CHILDREN By David Hockney, Martin Gayford and Rose Blake

A reworked version of the grownup tome, this book centres on conversations between the iconic artist and author – both of whom speak with admirable simplicity. £14.95;  thamesandhudson.com November 201 8

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. . . m e h t Love ! e l i m s r i e h t e v o l You want the best for your child, from cradle to career, and their happy smile is the only thing you expect in return. So bring your baby to see us at Happy Kids Dental, either when the first tooth appears, or by their first birthday even if no teeth are showing.

Happy smiles start at Happy Kids Dental Call now to book your appointment! 020 7078 0822

. . . m e h t m LLoovvee the . ! e l i m ! s e l i r i e m s h t lloovvee thei r 74-78 Seymour Place, Marylebone, London W1H 2EH | 020 7078 0822 | happykidsdental.co.uk

You want the best for your child, from cradle to career, and their happy You want the best for your child, from cradle to career, and their happy smile is the only thing you expect in return. So bring your baby to see us smile is the only thing you expect in return. So bring your baby to see us at Happy Kids Dental, either when the first tooth appears, or by their first at Happy Kids Dental, either when the first tooth appears, or by their first birthday even if no teeth are showing. birthday even if no teeth are showing.

Happy smiles start at Happy Kids Dental Happy smiles start at Happy Kids Dental Call now to book your appointment! Call now to book your appointment! 020 7078 0822 020 7078 0822

74-78 Seymour Place, Marylebone, London W1H 2EH | 020 7078 0822 | happykidsdental.co.uk 74-78 Seymour Place, Marylebone, London W1H 2EH | 020 7078 0822 | happykidsdental.co.uk HKD.indd 1

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Karma Chameleon • BUGABOO •

From the brand that changed everything, the buggy that started it all. The Cameleon3+ is the latest, greatest version of Bugaboo’s original stroller, featuring a lightweight, go-anywhere design in a spectrum of cool colourways. The Plus model includes a carrycot and seat unit, so the stroller can carry your babe from birth to infancy and beyond. From £859; bugaboo.com

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Watch

Babe

Seasonal styles, gift ideas and practical kit for little ones Wo r d s H E L E N BA RO N

Small Wonder SMALL S

British brand Smalls makes supersoft merino essentials, for children, that can be worn year-round. Expert craftsmanship ensures years of wear, so pieces can be handed down to siblings. And when they finally reach the end of their life cycle? They’re completely biodegradable. lovemysmalls.co.uk

Culinary Art TATE

Protect little clothes from little cooks with this wipe-clean children’s apron from none other than the mighty Tate. It features a cute Moomins print officially sanctioned by the estate of the work’s creator, Tove Jansson, and available in a striking shade of Scandinavian red. It’s the ideal antidote to culinary chaos. £12.50; shop.tate.org

BUNDLE OF JOY KONGES SLOEJ D

Keep tiny tots extra cosy this winter with this muslin swaddle, ethically made in India in the softest cotton ever. Baby’s head fits snugly in the pocket, which comes adorned with a cute tassel. We adore the ‘nimbus cloud’ hue (pictured). bonordic.co.uk

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Editor’s Pick

essen t i a ls KIDS

Made With Love ORGANIC ZOO

Inspired by uniqueness, kindness and love, Organic Zoo’s latest collection is its boldest yet. Slogan tops proclaim the mantra “kindness is my superpower” in the season’s most desirable colourways of clay, rust and spice, with contrasting prints in a delicate sage grey. organic-zoo.com

WINTER WARMERS MAMAS & PAPAS

The brand have really upped their game in the style stakes lately, producing on-point pieces each season. As the weather turns nippier, we’re loving this cute, gender-neutral hat and mitten set in a plush blue with luxuriously soft faux-fur lining and trim. mamasandpapas.com

DINO DROOL LIBERT Y OF LONDON

Mixing grown-up elegance with childish fancy, these bibs are adorned with prints of dinosaurs frolicking among foliage. They’re crafted from absorbent Liberty lawn cotton and fasten with a simple snapper – they’re as practical as they are pretty. £15; libertylondon.com

Wild Bunch VILD HOUSE OF LITTLE

We’re loving this new limited-edition capsule collection, from Swedish brand Vild, which features luxe streetwear for kids in a vibrant “night forest” print. Who knew hoot-owls and bomber jackets would make perfect style bedfellows? vildhouseoflittle.com

Dress to Impress DJ ECO

An early one for the Christmas gift list? We love the innocence of this 2D wood-and-felt threading kit, from toymasters Djeco, which lets littles play dress-up while introducing them to a key crafting technique. £13.45; crafts4kids.co.uk November 201 8

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littlelife.com

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LittleLifeUK

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mamahood AU T H O R A N D B LO G G E R T H E U N M U M SY M U M p . 2 7 • P O D C A ST I N G A N D LI F E - COAC H I N G W I T H ZO E B L A S K E Y p . 2 9 • A LE X H U N T E R TA LK S LI F E A S A S I N G LE PA R E N T p . 31

Hard Labour • IN THIS SECTION •

Model and blogger Jess Bowen opens up about the arrival of her daughter, Eliana, in the first of a new, occasional series. In “A Birth Story”, we’ll share and celebrate the myriad ways in which modern mamas welcome new life into the world. And we’re so excited the lovely Jess agreed to lead the charge...

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mama h ood

Q&A

INSTA MAMA Mum-blogger and parenting author Sarah Turner @theunmumsymum theunmumsymum.co.uk

Q When and why did you decide to start blogging? A I first started blogging in 2013. I was finding motherhood really hard (Henry had just turned one) and I felt like everybody else was coping. I looked online for something to reassure me that I wasn’t the only one struggling, but everything I found just made me feel worse. It took me less than an hour to set up a blog and publish my first post. I didn’t overthink it and I certainly didn’t imagine anything would come of it – I just needed somewhere to let it all out! Q How do you maintain audience loyalty in the competitive world of honest mum-blogging? Is there room for more bloggers? A I’d say there is always room for more bloggers! If you have something you’d like to say, you should say it.

~ “IT TOOK ME

My followers have always been really supportive but many of them have been following our family for over five years now, so I suppose they feel invested!

LESS THAN AN HOUR TO SET UP A BLOG AND PUBLISH MY FIRST POST. I DIDN’T OVERTHINK IT ”

Q Tell us about the events you run: Mums Night Out and Knackered Mums Night Out. A I love doing these events and the general idea is to get mums out of the house of an evening, where they can enjoy a glass of wine and have a giggle about the reality of parenting. It’s a bit like group therapy. Q To what do you ascribe your popularity and how did that lead to your book-writing opportunities? A I think it was a combination of factors. Timing is one, as mine was one of the earliest “honest parenting” blogs. The time and effort I put in to my Facebook page also helped as it grew my audience quickly. Finally, I like to think the book-writing opportunity came about because,

above all else, I’m a good writer. It’s all I want to do. Q How did you find the process of writing the book? Was it much different to writing for the blog? A I love the book-writing process. The chapters or sections themselves tend to be very similar to my blogs, so the style of writing is the same, but as a process it’s a lot more complex. My blogs are thrown together randomly, whereas a structure is planned for the books and there’s a lot more editing. I find the self-discipline needed for book-writing quite hard though, as I’m very easily distracted! November 201 8

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mama h ood Q & A

woman in

WORK Zoe Blaskey on Motherkind, her “self-care” support platform Q Tell us about how Motherkind came to be. And how do you recruit people for the Motherkind podcast? A I founded Motherkind last year because I couldn’t find what I needed when I had my daughter. I found the transition into motherhood very challenging and I wanted to start a supportive conversation about motherhood by talking to wellbeing experts. Every week on the podcast, I chat to experts to share their wisdom, experience and tools – I’ve been lucky enough to interview some of the world’s best, such as Julie Montagu, Chloe Brotheridge, Mel Wells, Marianne Williamson, Dr Kristen Neff and Madeleine Shaw, to name a few. I’ve receive messages daily from mums who tell me the podcast has changed their life – I cry every time!

“ W E’ VE F I N ALLY R E ALI S E D T H AT I F W E’ R E CO N STAN T LY GI VI N G TO OT H E RS , W E CAN BU R N O U T ”

Q There’s been a real upturn in talk about “self-care”, especially aimed at mothers and women. Why do you think that is? A I think we’re finally waking up to the fact that if we’re constantly giving to others and not to ourselves as well we can burn out, experience less joy, feel stressed, snappy, depleted, anxious and even depressed. And that’s not what we, or those around us, need. Our family needs us to feel happy, fulfilled and healthy. So many women struggle with giving even 10% of the care and attention they give to others back to themselves – often that’s because it wasn’t modelled to us when we were growing up or we might have somehow got the message it’s selfish to look after ourselves. So by looking after ourselves, we’re showing our children how to do it and we’re in a far better place to care for those around us. It’s a win-win. Q Are people more anxious than ever before, do you think? A Yes, without a doubt, and the data reflects that. Some experts say we are living in an “anxiety epidemic”. The pace of modern life, the “always on” work culture and social media are major contributors. Many of the mums I coach through my three-month programme come to me with anxiety and by the end of our time together feel transformed. In my experience anxiety is often trying to tell us something and when we shift the focus from trying to push it away to accepting it, amazing changes can unfold. Q How do you practise self-care? A I do three acts of self-care every day: a short meditation, a gratitude list and journaling (free-writing my thoughts down onto paper). I’ve learned how to fit these in with being a mum and I’m a better mother, wife and friend because of it. On the days I miss, I notice I start to feel overwhelmed, anxious, guilty and experience much less joy in my day. My number one tip for timepoor mums is to start doing a gratitude list, looking for and listing things that are great in your life, however small. It’s also a lovely activity to do with children and makes such a difference; our minds are wired for negativity, so by looking for what’s good – everything can change. Oprah said this simple practise changed her life. If it’s good enough for her... Zoe is the host of The Motherkind Podcast, offers 1-2-1 coaching, runs events, retreats and is a regular contributor to the media. motherkind.co @motherkind_zoe November 201 8

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every stageâ&#x201E;¢ fx signature Welcome to a luxurious world of soft, textured, quilted fabrics; aged cognac leatherette touches in all of the most elegant of spaces; and beautifully tailored lines; all exquisitely crafted to make memories of each moment with baby last forever.

A SIMPLY TIMELESS MEGA GROUP SAFETY SYSTEM THAT GROWS FROM INFANT TO INFINITY.

joiebaby.com/signature Available from Argos, Boots, Halfords, John Lewis, Mamas and Papas, Mothercare, Very and all good independent nursery retailers

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mamah ood COLUMN

“ TH E M INO R D E TA IL S O F PA R E N TING , T HE TI N Y V I C TO R IES , G O U N S H AR E D”

real mum talk...

Alone We Are Stronger

Alexandra Hunter on the highs and lows of life as a single parent

his might sound strange but I’ve just finished an email to my beautiful two-year-old, who is snoring upstairs, telling him about our glorious summer. As a single parent, should something happen to me, I want him to know how very much his mama loved him, and the adventures we’ve had together. I know that there won’t be another parent to tell him about us for me, as his father and I separated when he was 13 months old. I also thought it would be useful for him to have a sensible gmail address, although this will no doubt be redundant by the time he’s 18,

when the details of the account, along with the slightly emotional emails written by Mama after a long day’s parenting and a glass of wine, are finally released to him. In the last year I have been suddenly forced to think about things that I never fully considered when I was part of a couple. I have made a will and set out my wishes. I have made provisions and thought long into the night about what I would want for my son were I not here. I have insurance. I now know what beliefs, in every sense, really matter to me and how I can instil those in him. It all feels terribly grown up and I don’t feel fully qualified to do it. I never thought I would be a single parent. Sometimes it makes me sad for my son that he won’t have the conventional family set-up. However,

I know that having two parents he knows love him very much is infinitely better than enduring the misery of two parents who shouldn’t be together. Children learn about relationships from their parents, and base their own relationships on what they witness at home when young. I tell myself this regularly. Being a single mama has its ups and downs. There’s no third person when we’re out to take that casual photo of the two of us laughing together, so I have to capture our memories myself. There’s no one to take over on the days when I’m ill and exhausted and just need to sleep, so I’ve learned to sleep when he does. I can’t go out on a Friday night, full stop, so we now have a house full of friends whenever I have the energy to cook. No one is as interested in your child as the other parent, and there are sometimes discussions I’d like to have at the end of a day that go unsaid. The minor details of parenting, the tiny victories, go unshared. When my world fell apart, I came back to the city where I grew up, and so I’m very lucky to have wonderful family and many of my childhood friends nearby. I’m so pleased I did. Honesty, asking for help and building a village have all been so important to me and our happiness. Being a single parent is hard, but it’s also liberating. I am stronger and wiser as a result of the trauma; I am more aware both of myself and my child; and I know that I am the best possible parent I can be to my son. And when I’m not, there’s always iPlayer, which guarantees 15 minutes of peace. November 201 8

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A BIRTH STORY Model and blogger Jess Bowen shares the true-life story of the birth of her daughter, Eliana

I m a g e s M A R K WA L L I S P H O T O . C O M

rom first twinge to first cuddle, the birth of my daughter Eliana lasted 75 hours. That’s three days and almost four nights, including the postpartum cleanup operation, during which I didn’t sleep for longer than ten minutes straight. It may sound like the stuff of labour nightmares and I’m pretty certain our NCT practitioner hadn’t forewarned us that things had the potential to go on that long. But actually, surprisingly, it was the best few days of my life. While I was in the throes of my long latent phase of labour it felt like time was suspended. It was one of those strange moments in time when you are aware of the gravity of a situation while you’re in it and I love the fact that I remember certain points of it with the pin-sharp clarity that only comes with momentous deep-feeling.

The first hints of a contraction began on a Monday evening. I’d been for a walk with an equally heavily pregnant friend earlier that day and as it turned out it was the walk that triggered both our labours; or maybe it was the Costa hot chocolate that we took with us as we traipsed Clapham Common on a chilly February morning. I was five days off my due date and as this was my first baby, I hadn’t anticipated going into labour early – largely because I’m an habitually tardy person and had illogically expected my baby to follow suit. I was due on 7 February, so I was holding out for a Valentine’s baby and had a host of relevant middle names at the ready – Rose, Valentino, Byron, Ruby. But it wasn’t to be. After that walk I had an inkling things were beginning. My lower back became painful and there were other indicators that I’ll let you guess at rather than going into too much detail. At this point, however, my main concern was that I was unlikely to make the manicure I’d booked to celebrate my due date, so I spent the afternoon ferociously picking

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mamah o o d

RE AL LIFE

fiercely, unable to speak for a few seconds but otherwise unperturbed. My parents had planned a visit for the Tuesday to help me fulfil my final nesting plans, but instead they ended up being supplementary birth partners. My mum and husband took it in turns to keep me company through the night, to coach me through my contractions and massage my shoulders. For all the frustration of waiting, the air in our London flat hung heavy with suspense and excitement. Our first baby, my parents’ first grandchild, was on its way. On Wednesday morning Simon drove me to St. Thomas’ hospital on the South Bank – the one I’d chosen at my booking appointment at the beginning of my pregnancy, because I’d heard the view of London landmarks from the labour ward was impressive. I was examined, told I was only 2cm dilated, given a sweep and sent home. By this point I’d already endured two nights without sleep, but the sweep gave me hope and I convinced myself I’d be back in and giving birth before the day was out.

“ALL NORMAL SENSE OF TIME WENT OUT THE WINDOW AS WE WAITED FOR THINGS TO PROGRESS”

away at the old shellac on my nails because (and there’s no logic to this) I wanted to look my best for my baby when Baby arrived. If only I’d thought to do something more useful, like nap. I mentioned these developments to my husband, Simon, but it wasn’t until we went to bed and my body relaxed that I started feeling the occasional twinge. They came at regular intervals and were quite close together but weren’t particularly uncomfortable – and they were very shortlived. On realising I might actually be going into labour, Simon leaped

out of bed and started frantically packing his hospital bag. Mine were ready in our spare room and waiting to go – had been for weeks. I found it impossible to concentrate for anticipation, and impossible to sleep through the pain because, although it was mild, it was still enough to keep me awake. The night rolled slowly on. I lay on the sofa and watched TV. It started snowing (I thought: “I’ll be able to tell our baby it snowed on the day they were born!”) and I eventually decided to get in the bath, candles aglow, and listen to a hypnobirthing soundtrack as I drifted in and out of a light sleep. I won’t regale you with every detail of the following three days, mainly because I don’t remember them all. All normal sense of time went out of the window as we waited for things to progress. Hundreds of contractions swept through me, rarely longer than ten minutes apart, and from around Tuesday afternoon they were enough to stop me in my tracks. I braced myself against walls, the mantelpiece, the kitchen counter and breathed, my TENs machine buzzing

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mamah o o d I walked, ate curry, drank raspberry leaf tea. I watched a Michael McIntyre standup show and laughed. I received a birth announcement from a friend (remember the one I went walking with on Monday?) and cried; I’d like to say out of happiness but it was actually out of frustration at this point. I drank tons of water, ate a lot of toast and had more baths. The contractions were painful now. I had to be helped in and out of the bath, on and off the toilet. When I got out of the bath someone had to have my TENs machine handy so I could reapply it immediately and be ready for the next contraction. I was exhausted and I knew that at some point I was going to have to summon the energy to give birth, one way or another – although I doubted I’d have the reserves required for it. My waters never broke despite my Pilates ball bouncing, lunging, stompy walking and fervent wishing. You can’t imagine my joy when my mucous plug finally revealed itself. I didn’t make it back into the hospital that day. In fact, if anything my contractions started to slow down. I spent that night in a stupefied state, moving between the sofa and my position at the mantelpiece, trying to catch a few seconds of sleep in between the contractions. Finally, on Thursday morning, I went into the antenatal ward to be checked and someone took pity on me. I was displaying some unsightly bovine behaviour – mooing

RE AL LIFE

“I WAS DISPLAYING UNSIGHTLY BOVINE BEHAVIOUR – MOOING AND SWAYING ON ALL FOURS IN THE CORRIDOR”

and swaying on all fours in the corridor – then turned on the waterworks. Despite the fact I’d only dilated to 3cm, I was admitted to the Home from Home midwife-led birthing

centre. What a relief that was. More than that. I felt like I’d walked into a luxury hotel, been given a glass of champagne and pointed in the direction of the spa. It was actually a bottle of Lucozade and a birthing pool but it was blissful to know I was on the home run. No hotel could have competed with the view from my room either. It had wall-to-wall windows showing off a panorama of Westminster and

Big Ben. The sort of view that would cost hundreds of pounds ordinarily and yet here was the NHS, obligingly footing the bill. I got into the pool and spent a good hour or so in there but my contractions ebbed away again and the midwives suggested a more active approach might move things along. I was offered aromatherapy oils and Simon was advised to give me a back massage, then I used gas and air to help manage the pain. We transferred to the garden room – a room at the corner of the hospital decked out in greenery, with two walls of glass overlooking Big Ben, Westminster Bridge and the London Eye. The room was quiet and calm and the afternoon winter sun slanted in as I moved around with my tank of Entonox following me like a pet on a leash. It was surreal watching all those thousands of people at street level hurrying about their business, while we watched silently from above. Since giving birth, every time I find myself on the South Bank or inching across that bridge in a taxi, I look up at the hospital and wonder if there’s a mum-to-be looking down while waiting for her baby to arrive. By this point, my contractions were strong and regular and I was told that, judging by the heartbeat, baby was happy. “Baby’s happy, Baby’s happy”. I heard that a lot that day. The baby’s pulse was taken every 15 minutes and every time the same thing. Knowing that she was tolerating this process gave me the strength to carry on. At around 6pm I was given an internal examination and told, devastatingly, that I was still only 4cm dilated. I took up the offer from my midwife, Maeve – a new one as I was onto the second shift now – to break my November 201 8

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The “Dreamer” is a bassinet, cradle with a gentle rocking motion or a travel bed. You choose which.

+44 (0)1978 664362

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05/07/2018 16:15

mamah o o d

RE AL LIFE

“I HELD HER AND WATCHED THE HANDS OF BIG BEN MAKE THEIR ROUNDS UNTIL THE SUN CAME UP ON A CLOUDLESS WINTER’S DAY”

waters. It was only then that she realised my baby was lying backon-back, in a posterior position, which was the reason for the excruciatingly slow progress. I panicked, having heard that “stargazers” are notoriously hard to deliver, and enquired after an epidural. Maeve left the room but things must have gathered speed quickly from that point, as I don’t remember her coming back. All my focus had turned inward as I knelt on all fours and circled my hips trying to get my baby to swivel. I eventually transferred back to the bed, although still on all fours and still with my gas-and-air mouthpiece locked in my jaw. Simon massaged my lower back continuously and I was completely oblivious to anything else in the room – another change in the midwife shift occurred without me registering and it was only when the new midwife suggested I go to the toilet that I acknowledged her arrival. I hobbled to the bathroom and couldn’t pee but felt the need to push. I told the midwife, Katherine, and after checking she confirmed I was fully dilated and ready to deliver my baby. I asked how long I would have to push for and she said no longer than two hours. In my Entonox-addled mind I thought “that’s two hours until I get the drugs to take this pain away”, because by this point I was completely delirious and didn’t really believe I was going to deliver my baby. One hour and 58 minutes later, a misshapen head was hanging between my legs and I suddenly regained some clarity as I realised I’d done it. Our baby had turned and made this birth possible. I was on all fours with my back to everyone and with the final push her body slipped out and was caught by the midwives. They passed her between my legs for me to hold and my husband, half laughing, half crying, told me: “It’s a girl, it’s a girl”.

Eliana arrived at 12.46am on 6 February. After delivering my placenta and being stitched back together I was given an hour of recovery sleep before being woken by the midwife while it was still dark. She gently encouraged me to try breastfeeding again, as both me and Eliana had been too exhausted to make it work immediately after the birth. We still struggled (and I didn’t get the hang of it for another 48 hours after that), but I held her and sat in bed watching the hands of Big Ben make their rounds until the sun came up on a cloudless winter’s day. I mentioned that these were the best few days of my life, which might be hard to believe given the way they unfolded. They weren’t the best days because they were when I met my daughter for the first time – although that of course was the main highlight. They were the best because I defied my own expectations of myself. I felt invincible in the aftermath of the birth. I’ve never been more overcome with self-belief than when the oxytocin was coursing through my veins over those next few days. If I could take on that feat of endurance and still have the birth I’d hoped for, then I could take on the world, right? All I’d need was a few consecutive hours’ sleep… @modelmother modelmother.co.uk November 201 8

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Scandinavian inspired childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s design

www.scandiborn.co.uk Find us on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook @Scandiborn

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Cool Casual • NOE & ZOE•

This street-savvy Berlin brand goes from strength to strength, with its AW18 collection supplying just about everything a modern mama needs to keep her wardrobe practical, comfortable and richly inventive – while doing the exact same thing for her tots. Plush textures, artsy clashing prints and bold statements abound. noe-zoe.com

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mama

ST Y L E NOTES

Helen Baron on the launches and labels shaping the season

R AW P OW E R TIBA & MARL

we love

BAC K TO BASICS THE COTTON STORY

This British start-up produces impeccably crafted basics from the finest supima cotton, without the designer markup. With a focus on ethical production and fair pricing, this is honest luxury – and a great source for classic pieces. thecottonstory.co.uk

The maternity bag specialists go bold for AW18, with a fashion-forward collection of changing bags and backpacks in eye-catching mirror metallics, faux fur and sports luxe nylon. Selected models are available in minime sizes, too. tibaandmarl.com

Retro Metro R I V E R I S L A N D X S I LV E R & L U X

The high street stalwart teams up with trendy London vloggers Silver & Lux for a capsule that’s high on ’70s colour and vintage-inspired statement prints. There are twinning pieces in abundance, too, so you can grab the same looks for your little ones. riverisland.com

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fas h i on

Patch Work

MAMA

nd Bra us Foc

PETER PILOTTO

Adored for their signature otherworldly prints and sculptural shapes, Peter Pilotto’s beautiful designs are walking works of art. This patchwork cotton-blend sweater will be the perfect winter warmer. £825; net-a-porter.com

Intelligent Style Clare Hornby, founder of Me+EM

AUTUMN SLEEVES

Wo r d s PE N D L E H A RT E

Q ME+EM has a loyal following. Did that happen quickly? A I was frustrated by how hard it was to find flattering, on-trend and beautifully made clothes, so I founded ME+EM in 2009 to offer women designer quality at lower prices. Since then, we have built a brand that responds quickly to the needs of busy women and this has really resonated with the customer.

PLUMO

The online fashion store strikes gold several times in its AW18 collection, not least with this grunge-inspired floral print dress. Style it like they do, with lace-ups and ankle socks, for added seasonal flourish. Reika dress, £149; plumo.com

5 o f t he b e st WI NTE R WA RM E RS ANTHROPOLOGIE Owena printed scarf, £42; anthropologie.com LOEWE Mohair long stripe scarf, £175; libertylondon.com

PALOMA Leandra wool shirt, €79; palomawool.com

Q Who is the ME+EM woman? A These are well-read, intelligent and discerning women who know and appreciate quality and good fit, but who lead extremely busy lives. They don’t have time to trawl the highstreet, but they want to look good and contemporary. We offer an edit of key trends that will take them from school run to office to dinner with friends. Q Tell us about the new collection. A Our whole ethos is “intelligent style”: clothes that are flattering and fashionable but you can still function in. The perfect example of this is our new Transformer Trouser. Essentially, it’s two trousers for the price of one: you can wear them full length or button them up at the cuffs to create a cropped trouser. meandem.com

BELLEROSE Finno socks, €29; bellerose.be

BELLEROSE Fuila socks, €25; bellerose.be

November 201 8

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SHINE ON Being pregnant doesn’t have to mean compromising on party style. Stand out in these hero occasionwear pieces from Seraphine Photog r a phy DA N W I L L I A M S Shop the Collection at SER APHINE .COM

Facing page:

MALIKA £99

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Facing page:

MELINDA £159 This page:

KENZIE £175

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Facing page:

CATHERINE £295 This page:

NATASHA COAT £195 ROSE DRESS £135

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This page:

HARRIET Â£185

Shot at THE LANGHAM HOTEL, LONDON Photography DAN WILLIAMS danwilliams40@me.com Hair & Makeup BETH OWENS bethan.owens@me.com Shop the Collection at SERAPHINE.COM

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FINE CASTING & BESPOKE HAND ENGRAVED JEWELLERY Telephone 020 8769 4757 Mobile 07977 477 518 enquiries@philippaherbert.co.uk www.philippaherbert.co.uk philippa_herbert Registered Charity no. 1167073

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06/02/2018 10:41

kid s

FA S H I O N NOTES Carly Glendinning rounds up the month’s best styles, looks and launches

P E AC E OUT WYNKEN

London-based brand Wynken takes a fresh approach to kidswear with contemporary, gender-neutral designs. The new collection is inspired by the emerging hip-hop scene of the 1980s. For this generation of b-girls and b-boys, expect tactile fabrics, playful prints and fun detailing. wynken.co.uk

we love SET THE TONE O E U F N YC

This US brand is a favourite with design-conscious parents. They create ecofriendly pieces for the home and little one’s wardrobes, and we love the autumnal shades of the new clothing collection. Think velvet dungarees, traditionallycrafted knits, and pieces that are made to last. oeufnyc.com 50

Girl Power OUTSIDE THE LINES

Girly without being saccharine, Outside the Lines returns with their signature ’70s-inspired style. Look out for bohemian dresses with artisanal detailing, shaggy faux-fur coats, ruffles, bows and colour-pop pom-poms galore. Designed for the free-spirited and wild at heart. outside-the-lines.co.uk

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fas h i on

Play All Day

KIDS

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MAIN STORY

British brand Main Story believes in good design and responsible production. The sustainably made collection of year-round basics is so comfortable, little ones will want to wear them day in, day out. Our favourites include slouchy sweatpants, oversized tee dresses and sweatshirts in muted tones. main-story.com

Turtledove London

GOING DUTCH

A unisex and eco-friendly brand, Turtledove London is all about slow fashion for kids

MAED FOR MINI

London-based family concept store Cissy Wears has become known for seeking out only the very coolest brands. This season, they have added Maed for Mini to their line up, a sustainable collection for kids from Amsterdam. We love the earthy colour palette, textural fabrics and vintage-inspired detailing. cissywears.com

5 o f t he b e st SPARK L E R STY L E FUB Striped Woollen Mittens, £23; smallable.com BOBO CHOSES Intarsia Geometric Beanie, £31; alexandalexa.com

RASPBERRY PLUM Navy Boogie Jacket, £160; alexandalexa.com

YOUNG SOLES Sidney Brogue Boot, from £81; youngsoles.co.uk

STELLA MCCARTNEY KIDS Star Bag, £104; childrensalon.com

stablished by a husbandand-wife team in 2016, Turtledove London is an eco-friendly and unisex brand for little ones aged 0-8 years. The name comes from the cockney rhyming slang for the word “love”, which is apt considering the care and attention that is put into producing each garment. As it’s anti fast fashion, we salute the brand’s mindful approach to design. Collections are season-less and can be worn throughout the year. The colour palette is simple (monochrome with a couple of tonal pops – for autumn, it’s teal and honeycomb) and the shapes put an emphasis on comfort rather than trends. Every step of the manufacturing process is carefully considered as well. Made using GOTScertified organic cotton and without harmful azo dyes, the fabrics are kind to little one’s skin and the environment. It would be hard not to fall for the brand’s imaginative, in-house designed prints, too. The AW18 collection takes inspiration from the works of David Hockney and features kooky characters including Mr Panda (wearing Hockneyesque glasses), Percy the cat and Maurice the dog (who are playfully named after the artist’s own pets). turtledovelondon.com

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FOLK TA L E S

Delicate embroidery meets deep natural tones for a classically bohemian collection from Apolina Kids P h o t o g r a p h y E M M A D O N N E L LY apolina-kids.com

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wellness

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It’s a Gem

IMAGE: THE DETOX MARKET - NAZAN SCHNAPP

• NA ZAN SCHNAPP•

Mark World Vegan Month this November by picking up one of the organic, crueltyfree products from new Swiss skincare brand Nazan Schnapp. The line includes luxe cleansers, masks, face mists and oils that blend fine plant-based, antioxidant ingredients enriched with precious gemstones. We hear Emma Watson is a big fan of the May Rose Hydrating & Balancing Face Mist. Don’t mind if we do. contentbeautywellbeing.com

November 201 8

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Award winning products created by orthodontists, designed for babies.

soother teething ring

Oral care starts at birth

toxin-free

toothbrush

There may be no sign of teeth yet but they are there, waiting to make an appearance, hidden away in tiny gums. CURAPROX Baby works hand in hand with mother nature to support the natural development of your baby’s mouth from their jaw line and teeth to their breathing. Did you know that 70% of children who use a standard paciﬁer develop an open or cross bite in later life? The CURAPROX Baby paciﬁer has been designed to promote the correct development of your baby’s jaw keeping your baby happy and giving you peace of mind. So ensure your little ones get the very best start in Oral Care with CURAPROX Baby.

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Use offer code AB25 30/01/2018 24/01/2018 13:49 16:54

wellne s s

HE ALTH

Pick Me Up

• V I TA M I N I N J E C T I O N S L O N D O N •

Feeling a bit SAD now all that summer sun has retired? Vitamin Injection London’s new Seasonal Affective Disorder treatment programme might be your solution. It combines two vitamin, mineral, enzyme and micronutrient injections in one sitting for 12 weeks, and aims to minimise effects of living in our gloomier climes. £595 (single treatment), £2,499 (12-week course); vitamininjections.co.uk

mama’s

WELLN ES S N OTES The newest healthy snacks and fitness solutions for mums and munchkins

IODINE BOOST

THE V WORD

• D O C T O R S E AW E E D •

•TWO L(I)PS•

Our need for iodine cannot be underestimated – for mums, dads, kids, mums-to-be; the whole family – so that’s why we love the Weed & Wonderful range of four new products packed with sustainably harvested Scottish seaweed. Two of the capsules contain as much iodine as three whole mackerel. £19.95; seaweedandco.com

The world’s first luxury skincare range for the vulva has launched, and it kicks off with Blackout. It’s an infrared, activated charcoal, serum-soaked sheet mask that is designed to improve female hygiene and skincare for your privates. No need to blush. £17 (single mask), £68 (box of five); twolips.vip

Home Comforts

BY RUBY

oo many meal delivery companies fall short on flavour and packaging, but By Ruby’s dishes are genuinely tasty. Made with 100% natural ingredients and completely recyclable packaging, the dishes are bursting with homecooked wholesomeness. Win-win.  byruby.co.uk November 201 8

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GOOD cooking Model turned foodie icon Lorraine Pascale talks motivation, inspiration and her part in Aptaclub’s Eating for 2 campaign Wo r d s H E L E N BA RO N

onsidering her lustrous career path as a model-turnedchef-turnedbestselling-author, you could be forgiven for thinking Lorraine Pascale has it easy. But as a working mama from a less than privileged background, it took hard work, tenacity and tactical thinking for her to achieve success. We spoke to her about inspiration, working life, becoming a mother and her latest collaboration, the “Eating for 2” campaign with Aptaclub. Q You’ve been very open about your path to your current career, and about taking time to find your passion. Did you ever feel like giving up? A I never felt like giving up as I knew that one day I would find that special something that made me tick. So I just kept on going and didn’t listen to the voices around me – some of which kept saying that I should hurry up and

pick one thing, and stop bouncing around. It’s about having that self-belief that you will find [your passion]. Q In cooking, it seems you’ve found a vocation. How much of your passion is for the food itself and how much is for inspiring others? A That’s quite perceptive. I like to do things that make people feel good, feel better. I like to leave people feeling better than they did before they baked the recipe or read an article. I’ve had many bumps in life, especially in my early years. I used to see them as a negative but now I see them as a positive. I’ve worked hard to overcome setbacks and now from that place I want to help others as much as possible and enhance lives. Q Your first job was as a fashion model. Is there anything you miss about that life? A My first job was actually ironing smalls and sheets. I was only paid a pound an hour but I loved the fact that I was actually making money. I still model today, but my focus is on other things.

absolutely-mama.co.uk

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05/10/2018 13:15

wellness

INTERVIEW

Roast chickpeas & almonds with smoked paprika Prep time: 10 minutes Cook time: 30 minutes Serves: 10 x 20g servings

Ingredients • 400g tin of chickpeas, drained and rinsed • Leaves from 2 sprigs of fresh rosemary (about 1 tsbp), finely chopped • 2 tsp ground cumin • 1 tsp smoked paprika • 100g whole almonds • Freshly ground black pepper Recipe allergens: tree nuts (almonds). All nutritional claims based on analysis of 100g.

Method 1 Preheat the oven to 200°C (fan 180°C), 400°F, Gas Mark 6. 2 Toss the chickpeas, rosemary, cumin, paprika and pepper together on a large baking tray. Spread them out in an even layer and bake for 15 minutes until just beginning to crisp up. 3 After this time, scatter in the almonds and give everything a good toss together. Return to the oven for another 15 minutes until the chickpeas are crisp and have caught colour. 4 Remove from the oven, top into a bowl, allow to cool a little more then serve.

Q You’ve also said that it was the birth of your daughter that led you to seek a different career – in what other ways do you think motherhood has changed and influenced you? A It has made me more patient and less selfish as there is someone else to consider besides myself. It has made me feel younger and stay feeling young. Children help you to feel young! Q You’re now officially a “celebrity chef” (and we mean that in the best sense of the term). Do you find TV work to be a challenge with a young daughter? Or is there more flexibility than in other careers? (For

example, running a bakery must have been tough, hours-wise!) A There can be flexibility in many careers, it all depends on the employer. Will they let you work from home? Will they let you leave early or (if you have to) at the last minute? I think all work can be challenging with regard to time management – with or without a child! Q Your writing really emphasises your interest in psychology, neuroscience and life as an emotional journey. Do you think this was informed by your own experiences? A Absolutely. When I was younger I was so insecure, so scared of my own shadow and so angry with the world because of what

had happened to me. I envied friends who had a stable background, one family and consistency and love. It took a lot of mistakes and tears to come to a place of peace and acceptance. I’ve used psychologists along the way and been fortunate enough to have been helped by some insightful, brilliant and funny people. I don’t want to be a psychologist but I do want to be a conduit to help people change. I have read so many stories of people’s personal, emotional and mental transformation and they inspired me along the way. I am currently developing platforms on social media and otherwise to be able to inspire and help people the way these amazing people helped me. November 201 8

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Q Do you have a favourite cuisine to cook and/or eat? A favourite dish of yours? A I must say, I don’t have a favourite dish. I cook many dishes and it all depends on one’s mood. I haven’t been able to cook that much recently as I’m just building a kitchen studio and have been having lots of dinners out, so I can’t wait to get back in the kitchen! If I had to choose, I’d say pan-Asian, as it’s one of my many favourites. Fast, fresh and easy. Q What do you think about the rise in popularity of “clean eating” and – you must get asked this a lot – how do you stay so slim while being such a proficient baker? A I don’t bake as much as people think I do. And I certainly don’t eat the whole cake when I cook it! I [go to the] gym six times a week, and I think about the food that I’m eating. Is it healthy? Is it good for my body? Not always, but I like to feel healthy and fit. Q What can we expect from you next? What’s on the horizon? Tell us about the “Eating for 2” campaign. A There will be more food and more things around wellness and helping people transform and lead better lives. Eating for 2 is a fantastic campaign I’m working on at the moment for Aptaclub. It’s a free nutritional resource for mumsto-be to help bust the myth about “eating for two”, which many people still believe means eating twice as much. Aptaclub has teamed up with Dr Dawn Harper to provide lots of useful information about diet during pregnancy, and to provide women with all the information they need. Alongside this, I’ve been working with a nutritionist and have created seven new delicious recipes that are specifically tailored for pregnancy, to give mums some inspiration in the kitchen. We want to dispel the myth of eating for two but also provide easy-to-make and nutritious recipes to shows mums-to-be that, just because you’re pregnant, it doesn’t mean meals have to be boring! Q How do you see your career progressing and evolving? Where would you like to be in 10 years’ time? A In 10 years’ time?! I haven’t projected that far into the future. I hope that I’m making a positive difference in people’s lives and I hope that I’m happy, healthy and at peace. 64

Spiced prawn lunch box Prep time: 5 minutes Cook time: 35 minutes Serves: 4

Ingredients

Method

• 225g wholegrain rice • 4 spring onions, finely sliced • 2 large tomatoes, cut into small cubes • 250g raw (or pre-cooked) peeled king prawns • (optional) 5 slices of jalapeño pepper (from a jar, no added sugar), roughly chopped • ½ tsp powdered chilli • ½ tsp powdered cayenne pepper • 1 tsp ground cumin • ½ bunch of parsley, finely chopped • ½ bunch of chives, finely chopped • 1 tsp rapeseed oil • A pinch of salt

1 Cook the rice according to the packet’s instructions. 2 Five minutes before the rice is ready, put 1 tsp of oil in a medium frying pan over a high heat. Once hot, add the raw or pre-cooked prawns, slices of jalapeño (if using), chilli, cayenne and cumin, along with a pinch of salt. 3 Cook for a couple of minutes, stirring regularly, until they turn pink and are cooked through (if you are using raw prawns) or until they are piping hot inside. 4 When the rice is finished, drain it and then add the sliced spring onions and the chopped tomato, stir a little then tip the cooked prawns in with the rice, stirring again. 5 Sprinkle on the parsley and chives and serve with a lemon wedge.

To serve: • 1 lemon, cut into 4 wedges Recipe allergens: crustaceans (prawns).

absolutely-mama.co.uk

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05/10/2018 13:16

wellness

Blackberry and raspberry ginger yoghurt pots Prep time: 3 minutes Cook time: 17 minutes Serves: 4

Ingredients • 300g raspberries • 300g blackberries • 2 tsp ground ginger • 1 piece of fresh ginger, peeled and very finely chopped • 1 tsp rapeseed oil • 100g oats • 500g natural yoghurt Recipe allergens: oats and milk.

INTERVIEW

Method 1 Put berries in a wide, medium pan with the ground and fresh ginger and 2 tsps of water and place over a low heat. Cook for around 10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the berries are soft and mushy. 2 Remove from the heat and leave to cool completely before serving. 3 Meanwhile, using some kitchen paper, rub a medium non-stick frying pan with the oil and set it over a medium heat. 4 Add the oats and cook for 4-5 minutes, tossing frequently, until just catching colour. Remove from the heat and leave to cool completely before serving. 5 Divide the yoghurt, berries and oats among four bowls and serve.

Apricot, mixed seed & vanilla muesli Prep time: 10 minutes Serves: 2 x 45g servings

Ingredients These recipes are taken from a selection developed by Lorraine Pascale for Aptaclub’s Eating For 2 online resource. For the full list, visit aptaclub.co.uk/ eatingfor2

• 400g porridge oats • 75g dried apricots, roughly chopped • 75g dates, roughly chopped • 150g whole almonds • 175g mixed seeds (like pumpkin, sunflower, linseeds, poppy and sesame seeds) • 50g toasted flaked almonds • Seeds from 1 vanilla pod • 135ml unsweetened fortified almond milk to serve Recipe allergens: oats, tree nuts (almonds), sesame seeds, gluten and sulphites.

Method 1 Mix all of the ingredients together in a large bowl until evenly combined. 2 Pour into an airtight container. 3 Serve with almond milk.

November 201 8

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05/10/2018 13:18

The Maserati of SUVs The The Maserati Maserati ofof SUVs SUVs

Levante. Now available with 0% finance* and 3-years free servicing** 0% finance* Levante. Levante. Now Now available available with with 0% finance* and and 3-years 3-years free free servicing** servicing** H.R. Owen Maserati London

Melton Court, 25-27 Old Brompton Road, London SW7 3TD H.R. Maserati London H.R. Owen Owen Maserati London 0333 240 1580 hrowen.co.uk/maserati Melton Court, 25-27 Old Melton Court, 25-27 OldBrompton BromptonRoad, Road,London LondonSW7 SW73TD 3TD 0333 0333 240 240 1580 1580 hrowen.co.uk/maserati hrowen.co.uk/maserati Official fuel consumption figures for the Maserati Levante MY19 range in mpg (l/100km): Urban 17.8 (15.8) – 29.1 (9.7), Extra Urban 27.6 (10.2) – 39.2 (7.2), Combined 23.1 (12.2) – 34.8 (8.1). CO2 emissions 282 – 213 g/km. Fuel consumption figures are based on Official figures the Levante MY19 range in (l/100km): Urban 17.8 ––24 29.1 (9.7), Urban standard EUconsumption tests for comparative purposes and may not reflect driving results. *Minimum 20% customer deposit. month term.Extra Offer available Officialfuel fuel consumption figuresfor for theMaserati Maserati Levante MY19real range inmpg mpg (l/100km): Urban 17.8(15.8) (15.8) 29.1 (9.7), Extra Urban on new(10.2) Maserati–Levante MY19 range ordered by23.1 30/09/18 and registered by 30/12/18 on PCP sales only. With PCP you mayconsumption return the vehiclefigures instead ofare making the final 27.6 39.2 (7.2), Combined (12.2) –– 34.8 (8.1). CO 282 –– Maserati 213 g/km. Fuel based on 2 emissions 27.6 (10.2) – 39.2 (7.2), Combined 23.1 (12.2) 34.8 (8.1). CO emissions 282 213 g/km. Fuel consumption figures are based 2 payment. It must be in good condition and if you exceed the annual mileage, you will be charged 12p per mile for exceeding 10,000 miles p.a. in this example. Model shown ison a standard EU purposes and may not real driving results. *Minimum 20% deposit. 24 term. Offer standard EUtests testsfor forcomparative comparative purposes may notreflect reflect 20%customer customer 24month month term. Offeravailable available Maserati Levante GranLusso MY19 (incl. Tri-coat paint, Silverand painted callipers, Metallic real finishdriving roof rails,results. Panoramic*Minimum sunroof, Bowers & Wilkinsdeposit. sound system, Rear laminated privacy

on Maserati Levante MY19 range ordered by 30/09/18 and by 30/12/18 on sales With Maserati PCP may the instead of the final onnew new Maserati Levante MY19 range ordered bywheels) 30/09/18 andregistered registered bythe 30/12/18 onPCP PCP salesonly. only. With PCPyou you mayreturn return thevehicle vehicle ofmaking making final glass, Driver Assistance Pack and 20” Efesto alloy which will increase minimum customer deposit to Maserati 32%. Subject to status. Guarantees mayinstead be required. Ts&Csthe apply. payment. ItItmust be and exceed the annual mileage, you be 12p mile exceeding 10,000 miles ininthis example. Model isisaa payment. must beiningood goodcondition conditionFinancial andififyou you exceedSL1 the0RW. annual youawill will becharged charged 12pper per milefor for exceeding 10,000 milesp.a. p.a. thisyears example. Modelshown shown At participating Dealers only. Maserati Services, Wemileage, work with number of creditors including Maserati Financial Services. **Three free servicing available Maserati Levante GranLusso MY19 (incl. Tri-coat paint, Silver painted callipers, Metallic finish roof rails, Panoramic sunroof, Bowers & Wilkins sound system, Rear laminated privacy Maserati Levante GranLusso MY19on (incl. Tri-coat paint, by Silver paintedand callipers, Metallic finish roofTerms rails, and Panoramic sunroof, on Maserati Levante MY19 models vehicles ordered 30/09/18 registered by 31/12/18. conditions apply.Bowers & Wilkins sound system, Rear laminated privacy glass, glass,Driver DriverAssistance AssistancePack Packand and20” 20”Efesto Efestoalloy alloywheels) wheels)which whichwill willincrease increasethe theminimum minimumcustomer customerdeposit depositto to32%. 32%.Subject Subjectto tostatus. status.Guarantees Guaranteesmay maybe berequired. required.Ts&Cs Ts&Csapply. apply. At Atparticipating participatingDealers Dealersonly. only.Maserati MaseratiFinancial FinancialServices, Services,SL1 SL10RW. 0RW.We Wework workwith withaanumber numberof ofcreditors creditorsincluding includingMaserati MaseratiFinancial FinancialServices. Services.**Three **Threeyears yearsfree freeservicing servicingavailable available on Maserati Levante MY19 models on vehicles ordered by 30/09/18 and registered by 31/12/18. Terms and conditions apply. on Maserati Levante MY19 models on vehicles ordered by 30/09/18 and registered by 31/12/18. Terms and conditions apply.

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wellness

The Birth of a

MOTHER

How one mama battled her own prenatal depression with a holistic and mindful approach to wellbeing

Wo r d s S H E RY L F R A N K L I N

MENTAL HE ALTH

meditation and surrounding myself with a strong support network of friends and family, I was able to start feeling more like me again. I also ate the right foods and nourished my body and mind to help me with the shift towards being a new mother. It was very much a lifestyle change. As mothers, we tend to forget about ourselves post-birth, as, naturally, our attention is on our little bundle of joy. However, when this becomes a detriment to our mental health, something has to give. While there is a shift in awareness on mental health and PND – both pre- and postnatal – women need to feel empowered about speaking up about it. More than 70,000 women in the UK suffer. That’s an NHS estimate based on the women who have been brave enough to speak up. Of those, only 15% seek help. I’m passionate about helping the 85% of women who may be suffering in silence, and the 15% who do not feel as supported as they can be. We need to bridge a gap between traditional counselling and medication. In a society where wellness is considered as paramount to our overall wellbeing, we need to take a closer look at how we support mothers holistically on what can be a very difficult journey.

“ I D I ST I N C T LY R E C A L L WO M E N GUSHING ABOUT E N J OY I N G T H E STA R T O F T H E I R M OT H E R H O O D J O U R N E Y. H O N E ST LY… I DIDN’T”

hinking back to the days when I was pregnant, I remember when the age-old saying “nothing can prepare you for motherhood” started to concern me. I like to be prepared and started to feel like I wasn’t (despite all the incessant “preparing for your baby” book reading and “well-meaning” advice from others). I distinctly recall women gushing about loving being pregnant and enjoying the start of their motherhood journey. Honestly… I didn’t. I could feel something changing towards the middle of my pregnancy, as I didn’t feel like “myself”. When I look back, my prenatal depression (PND) started when I was around five months pregnant. There are many factors that can influence PND. For me, it was about my shift in identity and a feeling that I had no idea what I was doing; venturing into the unknown world of motherhood I felt sad and incapable. The first few months of my son’s life can only be described as a hazy blur. So I

decided I had to get help. After a couple of trips to my GP, the options outlined to me were anti-depressants or counselling. I didn’t want to become dependent on medication to fix my feelings, but when I said I would try counselling the doctor advised me there was a months-long waitlist. I certainly didn’t have time to wait, and I was acutely aware that if I didn’t find a solution it could get worse. I wasn’t willing to take that risk. I wasn’t willing to let it take away the joy of motherhood that I desperately wanted to feel, to have that mummy glow and truly experience the most wonderful job in the world. So I decided to take steps to help myself, with a mindful approach to my wellbeing. Yoga had always been a huge part of my life and I made a commitment to go as often as I could, to get my identity back and feel like myself again. There is a strong link between mental health and how yoga can help ease depression, and I can truly say it improved my mood and mind-set considerably. Gradually, with my holistic approach to wellbeing through yoga, mindfulness/

Well.Mama. Mind Retreats

heryl, through her platform No Judgement Mama, is launching Well.Mama. Mind Retreats at a beautiful countryside location, working with highly trained and passionate brand ambassadors who support women with postnatal depression in a holistic way. This includes yoga, meditation, mindfulness and “Walk and Talk” counselling, as well as nutrition education. For more information, or to reserve your place for the next retreat, email contact@nojudgementmama.co.uk or follow @nojudgementmama on Instagram. November 201 8

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mama’s

B E AU T Y NOTES Niche fragrances, World Vegan Month and glow-boosting face products are on our winter list...

DUE EAST SRI LONDON

Oriental delicacy and finesse is combined with the power and opulence of the Middle East to create SRI London, a new niche fragrance that’s just launched at Harrods. The gender-neutral, five-piece collection uses oud, rose, orchid, amber and saffron – to name just a few of the luxe ingredients. From £190;

we love

harrods.com

TOUCH UP GORGEOUS GLOW

Forget all about that pregnancy glow; now get your glow on whenever you want (sans morning sickness), with this new range of liquid highlighters and holographic highlighting powders. Shimmer and shine your way to gorgeous skin. From £3.99 each; boots.com

See Me Rolling ELEMIS

Facial rolling is all the rage, don’t you know? Hence why Elemis has released the amethyst facial roller collection, which includes night recovery cream oil, a face mask, eye cream and the roller. It’s supposed to boost circulation, relax facial muscles, help eliminate toxins and reduce puffiness. £94; elemis.com

absolutely-mama.co.uk

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04/10/2018 19:52

wellne s s

Sweet Strokes

BE AUT Y

d& Trie ted Tes

M O LT O N B R O W N

“The fragrance has been created as a beautiful painting,” says expert Virginie Daniau of Molton Brown’s new Jasmine & Sun Rose Collection. “The ingredients have been mixed like colours.” Raspberry and peach, jasmine and osmanthus, labdanum and musk, all mingle across a smooth canvas of delicate femininity. Prices vary; moltonbrown.co.uk

THE LA NESBOROUGH CLU B & SPA Want luminous skin? Then this is the facial to book...

K E E P T R AC K

MIISKIN

Miiskin is the first app to be officially accredited by the Skin Health Alliance. It helps users to track skin and moles for changes over time by using photos. It also sends you regular reminders to keep it up. As skin cancer is the most common form of cancer in the UK, this is a necessary tool for all families. Free; miiskin.com

5 of the b e st WO R LD V E GA N M ON TH PI C K S SCRUB LOVE Original Lovin’ Coffee Body Scrub, £12.95; uk.scrublove.com

TISSERAND Aromatherapy Everyday Wellbeing Essentials, £11.95; tisserand.com

THE BODY SHOP Go Bananas Body Butter, £15 (200ml); thebodyshop.com

W o r d s E VA L E H O C Z K Y

’m at The Lanesborough Club & Spa for the 60-minute La Prairie Caviar Swiss Ice Crystals Facial. Crowned the World’s Best New Hotel Spa in 2017, I know that I’m in for a treat. Upon arrival I’m greeted by a lovely lady named Dasha, who ushers me from the lavish reception area into the female changing rooms, before taking me to meet my aesthetician, Agata. Agata then spends 10 minutes discussing my skin type and how she can customise the facial to meet my needs. I’m already impressed. The treatment begins with several cream and foam cleanses, a threeminute peel and extractions, all to ensure my skin is spotless. A skin caviar complex is then massaged into my face, accompanied by a lovely neck massage. Lastly, an application of Swiss Ice Crystal Eye Cream and then the serum is applied, followed by the Swiss Ice Crystal Emulsion, an age-delaying veil. Looking for that sought-after glow and pick-me-up for your skin? (Who isn’t?) I can’t recommend this facial enough. I leave with a fresh face and a luminous complexion. Hyde Park Corner, W1X 7TA; lanesboroughclubandspa.com

ALGENIST GENIUS Liquid Collagen, £90 (100ml); spacenk.com

BENECOS Kabuki Brush, £12.95; benecos.co.uk

November 201 8

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beauty for real women

Don’t

Sweat It

Meet Leyla Cooper, the powerhouse mama behind Pretty Athletic, the ingenious skincare line designed specifically for active women… W o r d s K AT Y G I L L E T T

THE PRODUCTS ARE FORMULATED FOR SWEATY, POST-WORKOUT SKIN

ith a fourmonth-old baby, three-year-old toddler, and a burgeoning business, it’s a wonder how entrepreneur Leyla Cooper manages to get in those all-important workouts. But she does. In fact, she recently hired a treadmill and now squeezes in a run in-between emails, product development, nursery runs, feeding (naturally, the list goes on for miles). It’s that mad rush from the gym to work or meeting friends or play dates that inspired her to develop Pretty Athletic, a line of skincare products designed (and made in the UK) specifically for #ladieswholift. And, as Absolutely Mama finds out, she’s exactly the kind of woman the range caters for… Q Why do you think active skincare for women is such an underserved market? A I think it’s because “sports skincare” has almost been synonymous with “male skincare”. Recent years have seen an increase in the number of women exercising, and the popularity of women’s sport is growing, and yet the skincare offerings for these active women have not caught up.

absolutely-mama.co.uk

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wellnes s

BE AUT Y

Q What makes your products different to other vegan, nasties-free beauty products that haven’t necessarily been created with post-workout skincare routines in mind? A They perform better pre- and post-workout, on sweaty skin. Just as a moisturiser designed for oily skin may be fine for someone with dry skin, a moisturiser formulated specially for dry skin is better. A natural, vegan cleanser is fine post-workout, but ours is better; it’s soothing, refreshing, hydrating without being heavy, and specifically designed for sweaty skin. There’s a reason why we have women telling us our products are “so hydrating, not greasy or tacky” and something they’ve been needing for years, and that our products help with breakouts caused by sweating and wearing lycra. Q Is there a particular product in your collection you personally use the most? A I use the Workout Glow, which is our 3-in-1 rosewater spritz that has coconut-derived cleansers, soothing botanicals, multi-vitamins and hydrating hyaluronic acid, designed to cleanse, nourish and hydrate the skin all the time. I use it before and after exercise, every evening after cleansing to help remove final traces of eye make-up, and also in the summer when my skin is hot and clammy. It’s a multi-use product, smells amazing and I love it.

“OUR P R O D U C TS H EL P W I T H BR EA KO U TS CAUSE D BY SWEAT I N G AN D WEA R I NG LYC RA”

Q How do you manage your family, work and business responsibilities? A I just do. I love my family and I love my business, and each day I just try to do my best for both. Plus I have lots of help; my colleagues James and Laura are able to go to events and meetings that I would otherwise struggle to attend because of the baby, and also my parents stay at our house for a few days each week to help out with the children. Q What does a regular working day look like for you? A As I have a four-month old, my “regular working day” is actually quite irregular! At the moment I wake up, check emails and social media, get myself and the children ready and my three-year-old to nursery. I then get home and work while the baby is sleeping, which can be on a variety of things, such as marketing, events, customer or retailer enquiries, new product development

and research, social media, brand collaborations, website improvements, and so on. When the baby is awake I play with him while checking emails and also I get my exercise in while he is awake, as he seems to be relatively entertained watching me run on the treadmill and doing my exercises. I collect my daughter from nursery at the end of the day, but then in the evening once both children are asleep I usually get a few more hours’ work done. Luckily I love what I do! Q What advice would you give other mums looking to balance work and family, and still get in some workouts? A It’s really easy to let exercise fall by the wayside when you have young children – and personally I did struggle with my first – but I think you need to remember how important it is for your physical and mental health and

LEYLA COOPER, FOUNDER OF PRETTY ATHLETIC

try to figure out what works for you and your family, whether that’s group classes or athome workouts or just long walks in the park. For example, with my first child I used to pace around the Common with the pram and I also took personal training sessions at a fitness studio nearby where my little girl would crawl around while I exercised. Now with my second child, I have hired a treadmill (which is the best thing ever!) and I’ve found some really awesome online workouts. Q What’s next on the agenda for your business, specifically? A Last month we launched in 135 Waitrose stores across the UK, and we are really excited about expanding our retail distribution both within the UK and internationally. prettyathletic.com November 201 8

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welln es s

ADVICE

TOP TI PS

AV O I D I N G A I R POLLUTION b y S O PH I E P OW E R CEO and co-founder of Airlabs @air_labs

he air pollution problem in the UK is becoming a huge issue and awareness is growing rapidly. While we may not be able to avoid all the impacts yet, there are five simple steps you can take to significantly reduce your children’s exposure on any given day.

Cook clean

 Some of the gases and particles given off when cooking can reach harmful levels if your home is not properly ventilated. Cook with high smoke-point oils, such as sunflower, instead of olive oil. Ensure the kitchen is properly ventilated when cooking and keep children away if you smell smoke.

Drive smart

 Turn the car fan off in polluted spots like traffic jams or tunnels; it’s just sucking in exhaust fumes. Emissions from cars idling tend to be concentrated in hotspots such as school dropoffs. If you have to drive, switch your engine off when you stop.

Watch your step

 Believe it or not, air pollution levels can change significantly within only a few metres. Walking to school on the building side of the pavement (as opposed to the road side) can reduce your exposure by 30-60%. The best advice is to plan your walks where possible. Try to avoid peak traffic times and check online pollution maps for your area so you can avoid busy roads. Keep littles away from the kerb (which is safer anyway) and don’t dawdle on congested stretches.

How clean is clean?

 Most cleaning products and household goods release gases into the house. That “clean” smell is actually a mix of volatile organic compounds, which have been linked to a broad spectrum of health problems from headaches to asthma and cancer. Reducing use and properly ventilating the house after cleaning can minimise the impact.

Get the tech

 The most polluted air your children breathe is probably found inside your car. Sitting in traffic for an hour can lead to vehicle occupants inhaling two cigarettes’ worth of harmful nitrogen dioxide! The new Airbubbl from Airlabs is a compact, surprisingly stylish gizmo that cleans the air inside a car of harmful gases and particles – not to mention nasty odours.

Pre-order your Airbubbl at: airlabs.com/the-airbubbl November 201 8

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05/10/2018 14:12

am Cam Copenhagen’s core originates from the love of babies and children, and a belief that they only deserve the best. The strong values of Cam Cam Copenhagen are to create sustainable, functional and high quality products with a focus on Scandinavian and timeless design. All products are organic and free of chemicals and toxins and produced under controlled and safe conditions. Cam Cam Copenhagen is a GOTS (Global Organic Textile Standards) certified company, which is the world’s leading certification standard for organic textiles including both ecological and social criteria. Cam Cam Copenhagen’s purpose is not only to create a beautiful children’s universe, but also to make a positive difference in the world for generations to come.

w ww.c amc amc o pen h agen .c o m

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02/07/2018 13:59

home &

S I A N Z E N G ’ S D R E A M Y WA LLPA P E R S p .78 H O M E ST Y LE W I T H C A B BAG E S & R O S E S p . 8 2

Starry Night • DREAMS ON THE WALL•

The song says, “Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the stars” – and now you actually can. Bring your little ones’ dreams to life with a custom wall mural by Dreams on the Wall that lets them star (no pun intended) in their own bedtime story. Anything is possible. We’re absolutely enchanted. dreamsonthewall.com

November 201 8

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04/10/2018 20:02

mama

N U R S E RY NOTES

I M AG E IS IN FOLDER

The most covetable nursery furniture and accessories

WO O D E N HEART POTTERY BARN KIDS X WEST ELM

West Elm has teamed up with taste-making US mega-brand Pottery Barn Kids for the launch of the latter brand’s debut UK collection. Expect streamlined mid-century styling at reasonable price points. We’re officially intrigued. westelm.com

we love SPIN THE WHEEL LITTLE BABY C O M PA N Y

Beautifully made and cleverly designed, this colourful carnival wheel comes with a trio of wooden animal characters. Tinies will love cranking the little red handle and sending them for a ride in the sky. £39.95; cottagetoys.co.uk

Fur Enough EO

Introduce a touch of animal magic to your nursery with one of these cuteas-a-button chairs from Danish brand EO. Crafted from solid oak and walnut with a beautifully realistic faux-fur seat, they’re available in cow, fallow deer and sheep models. €199; eo.dk

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Soft Landing

NURSERIES

nd Bra us Foc

AC O R N & P I P

Available in two soft shades of wondrously plush velvet, these play mats encourage kids to contain their chaos while adding a dash of autumnal style to the nursery floor. What’s not to love? £69; acornandpip.com

INSIDESTORE

HOME FRONT MINIFILI

New to our browser bookmarks folder, Minifili offers so many of our favourite brands it seems like we must have briefed them in advance. Stylish homewares from the likes of Fabelab (pictured), Olli Ella and Meri Meri abound – plus cute toys and stylish, Scandiinspired takes on baby essentials. minifili.com

5 of t he b e st WI NT E R B L A N K E T S OYOY Kami blanket, £68.95; scandiborn.co.uk CAM CAM Pressed leaves blanket, £39.95; scandiborn.co.uk

FERM LIVING KIDS Fruiticana striped fish blanket, £67; smallable.com

JOOLZ Essentials honeycomb blankets, £50 each; my-joolz.co.uk

CAMOMILE LONDON Block print blanket, £131; smallable.com

ou don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone, the song says, and not for the first time we find ourselves in deep agreement with the marvellous Joni Mitchell. Case in point: news reaching us that London interiors boutique Future & Found – home to one of the finest selections of design-led furniture and homewares in the nation – was no more. But wait, what’s that? Future & Found hasn’t shut its doors for good? Turns out that owner Andrea just decided to give the business a fresh look. Newly remonikered Inside Store, the BFKAFF (Boutique Formerly Known as Future & Found) begins its next chapter with spiffy new branding, an enlarged shop space in London’s Tufnell Park and a reinvigorated approach to showcasing their eminently good taste. Whatever the name above the door, this has always been a boutique for the stylishly modern, stocking furniture and accessories from brands like Hay, Muuto and Ferm Living. But in its new guise, Inside Store has redoubled its efforts to supply visitors (in store and online) with everything from nursery furniture to candles and lighting to linenware. Take a trip to the bricks and mortar shop and you can tour the new showroom, styled like a real apartment and inhabited by a bevy of lucky rescue moggies. Nice touch. insidestoreldn.com

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Rooms with a

VIEW Home style with the master of magical wallpapers, Sian Zeng

Extract FROM MADE .COM P h o t o g r a p h y b y V E E R L E E VA N S

tatement walls – the clue’s in the name. The chance to be bold on a small scale. Unlike the brash “Changing Rooms” approach of the nineties, feature walls today are refined. A chance to express your individuality, no matter how nuanced. You like flamingos? Bicycles? Botanicals? There’s a wallpaper for that. Pattern designer and interiors business-owner Sian Zeng shows us how she’s embraced the trend in her leafy London flat.

F R E S H S TA R T

Sian’s always been into interiors, getting a wooden doll’s house as a child. “I used my pocket money to buy furniture pieces, excited to create this little styled home.” Moving into Kidbrooke Village in Greenwich with her husband Sebastian two years ago gave Sian another blank canvas. “The flat was brand new when we moved in. We just replaced the bedroom carpets with wood floors.”

S O F T LY D O E S I T

“I’ve primarily used pastels, accented with brass and copper. Plus grey, as it complements so many other colours. The pink Frame armchair is incredibly comfortable and photographs beautifully against my plants – great for Instagram!”

WA L L O F G L A S S

“The open-plan living/dining room is my favourite area. I’ve tried not to fill the room with too much furniture, so that I can still have some empty space to move around in. Two of the walls are huge windows, making the room feel very light and spacious. It’s like having a bit of the outdoors, inside.”

PLANTS, PLEASE

Despite not having a garden, Sian’s still got green fingers. “All of the light and outdoor space allows me to grow a lot of plants, making our flat look a bit like a greenhouse.” She buys her plants in stages, online from places like Patch and IRL from a market by her studio. November 201 8

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“ W H EN I USE A BO L D STATEMEN T WAL L PA P ER I KEEP T H E R EST OF TH E FU R NI TURE FA I R LY S I MPLE”

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C L O U DY O U T L O O K

“The shades of pink work wonderfully against the green plants on one side and my Winter Snowdrift wallpaper on the other. The brass Austin floor lamp contrasts beautifully against the soft grey.”

T O TA L LY T R O P I C A L

“When I use a bold statement wallpaper I keep the rest of the furniture fairly simple and pattern-free to allow the design to dominate. In the bedroom, we used my colourful Tropical Bloom Wallpaper, with simple grey furniture and curtains to complement it.”

TESTING, TESTING

Before committing to a wallpaper purchase, Sian recommends getting a sample first. “Ideally, with a full pattern repeat, to test on the intended wall. It’s the best way to understand if a design will work in your space, under different light and with your décor.”

S E R E N E S PA C E

“In my everyday life, I like to keep things tidy, but my working day is another story. When I’m designing, I allow my space to become messy while my mind is focused on creating. But when I’m done, I always return my desk space to a state of organised calm.”

QUIET ZONE

While Sian works from her London studio, having a home office space is also important to her. “It’s where I go to brainstorm ideas, or if I need a quiet escape to gather my thoughts.” The Edelweiss desk drawers are filled with “everything from felt-tip pens and watercolours to documents and concert tickets.”

T H AT ’ S L U S H

“I love the large terrace surrounding our flat. I wanted to create a lush, secluded garden, so I planted crawlers to cover the glass [partition] wall. We got the Lyra garden lounge set in green, as the colour matched our terrace rails.” November 201 8

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Cottage

INDUSTRY Christina Strutt, the founder of Cabbages and Roses, has created a beautiful country home... W o r d s K AT E G R I F F I N

hristina Strutt, founder of quintessentially British fashion and homeware brand Cabbages and Roses, was just 24 years old when she forsook the high-octane glamour of life as a London journalist, working for Vogue Living, in favour of spending her days at Brook Cottage, once a mill used by Gregorian monks in Somerset. This was the apotheosis of the life she had, for so long, promoted in the magazine. The departure represented a transition in the exchange of not only the single life for the married, but the urban for the bucolic. While it was neither deliberate nor conscious at the time, the trade-in of Vogue House for something more deep-rooted and resonant in the rolling Somerset hills would ultimately re-angle the spotlight, training it in the direction of her own home life, as opposed to that of others. Cabbages & Roses would one

day emerge as the expression of her life at Brook Cottage. The move, she cheerfully recalls, represented not only a thrilling adventure, but also an opportunity to play. Happily, for its part, Brook Cottage could scarcely have been more receptive as an experimental playground. Even the very first of her incremental changes – tailoring army surplus drapes, which happened to have blue roses on them, for the spare room – made it into the pages of Country Homes & Interiors magazine. This signaled once and for all that she was no longer cast in the role of temporary arbiter d’élégance at some of the most beautiful houses in the world. She was now the custodial guardian of one. “Cabbages & Roses came into being in the vegetable garden – which is still my obsession. All I ever wanted was to create something built around not just an idea, but a real life. Something that could be beautiful, that could move and charm, but that would be tangible, unfeigned, and sincere – keeping its sense of humour all the while.” The final characteristic in the Cabbages & Roses narrative is imperative, for it is inconceivable to think

of Christina without imagining her smiling wryly or, more likely, collapsing into giggles. As each week slipped by, so some new domestic contrivance slipped accordingly into place. The parlour, for example, was once the kitchen, but the two rooms were swapped to enable the latter to be home to the fireplace, a detail that has, ever since, delighted Christina who had long harboured reveries of a cosy hub of a kitchen, complete with roaring fire. This period of playful tinkering marked embryonic days of her home life becoming inexorably bound up with her work. Soon her continual interior alterations began to attract, within November 201 8

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h o me & interio rs INSPIRATION

her own circles, those keen to ape not just her home but, you sense, her lifestyle. While this rewarding canvas has been re-imagined over decades of Strutt familial life – her son, daughter-in-law, grandson and granddaughter live in the cottage opposite – Christina insists that her style remains fundamentally unchanged. “I didn’t know about beautiful pared-down Swedish style and beautiful old white china in the early days, but I still love the checks and faded florals and tartan I used back then,” she says, sitting among a surfeit of cushions and textiles that attest to this. “It has changed incalculable times over the years,

but the spirit of Brook Cottage remains. It is the constant.” A gratifyingly hefty medieval stone structure, Brook Cottage stands improbably picturesquely amid the undulating Somerset hills, just outside the city of Bath. In addition to its latest incarnation as the start and end point of Cabbages & Roses, the history of the house raises as many questions for a meditative Christina as those it articulately answers. “In many ways, we know so little about it, and that in itself is endlessly intriguing,” she reflects. “The vernacular architecture of the day and educated deduction point to it having been built in the 1500s, but it is difficult to date it precisely. What I find so captivating, though, is to imagine who lived here in the days before the renaissance, and how they lived here,” she says, before asking: “What have these old stones seen?” Whatever the narrative – real or imagined – Brook Cottage has, she considers, “kind walls,” a sentiment echoed by the woman who recently turned up on the doorstep to see the house to which she, along with some 20 other children, had been evacuated during World War II. “It seems that they’d lived on rabbits for the duration of the war. But somehow, they appear to have been happy here, despite all being crammed together in what is now my bedroom.” It is self-evident to anyone who crosses the threshold of Brook Cottage that it does indeed resonate with easy contentment. For

Christina, it was, simply and obviously, “the perfect country cottage” upon first sight, and also where she would be, enduringly, her happiest. For her children, it constituted the pastoral idyll from which they formed their world view. For her business, it would become the central core and the lifeblood. This deep and unswerving devotion has not waned. “That love is the linchpin,” says Christina. “Everyone comes back here. It is the meeting point of our lives.” Her latest favourite thing, she trills with unbridled enthusiasm, is the newest addition to the house: a celestially white studio. Built above the stable, it overlooks the same vegetable garden that gave rise to Cabbages & Roses, and it has replaced Christina’s kitchen table as her new hive of industry. “It is heaven, and just wonderful to have somewhere to go to that marks the beginning and the end to the day,” she effuses. That, in essence, encapsulates the spirit of Cabbages & Roses. The winding incremental changes made – not least the studio or the new gazebo that has reclaimed the courtyard and now provides a sitting room for summer – continue to inform the perennially growing business. And, as with the garden in which the business was conceived, beautiful pieces appear in the shop, only to be replaced, Mother Nature-like, just as soon as they’ve been bought with something new and equally exquisite. “I don’t understand how you can do a business that isn’t about what you love,” says Christina, underlining her guiding axiom. “You have to love it – it’s the only way you’ll ever be happy.”

Extracted from

LIVING LIFE B E AU T I F U L LY by Christina Strutt and Nancy Alsop, published by CICO Books (£25)

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ST YLE

Cassandra Rhodin of Mini Rodini shares her inspirations m i n i r o d i n i .co m • @ m i n i _ r o d i n i

FAVOURITE PIECE OF ART It’s absolutely impossible to pick one, but today it is Sigrid Hjertén’s world and paintings.

WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO DO AN INTERIORS LINE? Simply because I wanted it for myself and my own home!

FAVOURITE DESIGNER

As a person, Vivienne Westwood. She’s a non-conformist queen with strong ecological beliefs and concerns about mass production.

YOUR WORK’S BIGGEST INSPIRATION

Since I was young I’ve always been inspired by the worlds of nature and art.

FAVOURITE WINTER ACTIVITY

Lying on my sofa, watching telly and drinking mulled wine while the snow falls beautifully outside. Swedish winters are so magical!

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The Subscription

FOR MINDFUL PARENTS Sign up to Readly for only £7.99 a month and read all back issues of Absolutely Education, as well as our entire portfolio, including Absolutely Mama, Absolutely Weddings and Absolutely Home. Readly Subscribers also enjoy unbounded access to over 2,300 top titles.

Readly offers the freedom to effortlessly glide between articles and features that consider every essential piece of advice and info needed for education in the independent sector.

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Wall Stories

nspired by childhood memories of whimsical storybooks brought to life by captivating illustrations, Villa Nova has collaborated with three talented children’s picture-book illustrators: Frann Preston-Gannon, Christopher Corr and Yuval Zommer. The idea is to recreate the joy of children’s books in an enchanting collection of fun fabrics, wall-coverings and accessories, all of them bursting with wondrous creatures and scenes from faraway places. Dazzlingly colourful, the illustrations are so detailed they’re sure to be a source of constant intrigue. Christopher Corr’s work is about joy, colour and a love of life. He takes inspiration from his travels to India, North Africa and the US, and his work reflects his love of cities – particularly those places where old meets new in vibrant and surprising ways. Corr creates astounding imagery of crazy, complex cityscapes, working in gouache and painting on handmade paper as though using a pen. Yuval Zommer graduated from London’s Royal College of Art with an MA in Illustration. After working as a creative director at a leading advertising agency, his passion for picture-books triumphed; he is now the author and illustrator of several highly acclaimed children’s books. Yuval’s

Villa Nova has collaborated with three children’s book illustrators for a beautiful new range of fabrics and wallpapers. We take a look... Wo r d s E V E H E R B E R T

non-fiction titles include: The Big Book of Bugs, The Big Book of Beasts and the most recent addition to the series, The Big Book of the Blue. Yuval’s fiction picture-books include One Hundred Bones, One Hundred Sausages and The Street Beneath My Feet. His designs for Villa Nova possess the same sense of wonder and wildness as his children’s books. Frann Preston-Gannon is a London-based illustrator and designer. Her first picturebook, The Journey Home, was published in October 2012 and was shortlisted for both the Waterstones Children’s Prize and the Cambridgeshire “Read it Again” Book Prize. Frann’s books include I Am the Seed That Grew the Tree; Pepper and Poe; What a Hoot!; Sloth Slept On; Deep Deep Sea; Hot Dog, Cold Dog; Dinosaur Beach; How to Lose a Lemur; and Dinosaur Farm. It’s a dynamic and diverse oeuvre, and one that points toward the splendour, character and charm of the artist’s collaboration with Villa Nova. villanova.co.uk November 201 8

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Thai Utopia

•THE RITZ- CARLTON , KOH SAMUI •

The tropical paradise of Koh Samui is now home to a new Ritz-Carlton hotel that blends the brand’s stellar service with traditional Thai hospitality. The 58-acre oceanfront property is built on a former coconut plantation and boasts 175 suites and pool villas, six dining outlets, a spa, yoga pavilion, Swim Reef and The Ritz Kids programme – to name just a few highlights. ritzcarlton.com

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THE BIRTH OF YOUR BABY

IN TRUSTED HANDS THE LINDO WING, ST MARY’S HOSPITAL

The Lindo Wing, St Mary’s Hospital South Wharf Road, London, W2 1NY T: +44 (0)20 3312 6224 E: imperial.lindo.maternity@nhs.net W: imperialprivatehealthcare.co.uk Part of Imperial College Healthcare NHS Trust. All our profits are reinvested to support our NHS services

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INSPIRATIONS

Summer Loving •Nobu Hotel•

Nobu’s Ibiza Bay resort features everything you could want from a chic summer holiday in the Balearics – including two sea-view pools, stylish suites, a spa and (of course) amazing dining options. Most importantly, there’s a kids’ club – so you can actually enjoy all of the above. nobuhotelibizabay.com

mama’s

TR AVEL N OTES Eco swimwear, Ibizan luxury and the top spots for some family-friendly winter sun

or’s Editick P

RULE THE WAVES

HISTORIC HAVENS

•Folpetto•

• O l i v e r ’ s Tr a v e l s •

Sustainable swimwear is top of our holiday shopping list, and Folpetto is number one in that department. They create beautiful kids’ swimwear from recycled ocean plastics, and everything is sun-safe and stylish. Perfection. folpetto.com

Oliver’s Travels now offers stays at the amazing Ayrshire Castle, proving they’re no slouch in supplying atmospheric UK hideaways alongside their customary European villas. Christmas trip, anyone? oliverstravels.com

3 OF THE BEST FOR WINTER SUN DESTINATIONS

North Island

Westin

SEYCH ELLES

B A A ATO L L , M A L D I V E S

Owl & Pussycat

There are only 11 villas on this beautiful Seychelles island, which looks like something you’d see on a heavily Photoshopped postcard. Butler service, beaches and a buddy programme for youngsters complete the paradisiacal picture.

Built over the calm blue waters for which the Maldives are justly famed, the new Westin resort offers spa-like serenity and spacious suites perfectly designed for a family trip. Many rooms have private pools and all feature ocean views.

Galle is set to become one of the trendiest destinations of 2019 – and this ravishingly stylish hotel is the place to stay. Although kids are only permitted at certain times of year, so make sure you check the website.

wilderness-safaris.com

marriott.com

otphotel.com

GALLE, SRI LANKA

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ISLAND LIFE A Cretan holiday with a family-friendly difference

W o r d s J E S S B AT T E N

once read that parents don’t go holiday, they just look after their kids in a different city. So true do I find this statement that I actually find holidaying a bit stressful now I have a 15-month-old daughter. I always forget half her things, which in itself can lead to tantrums; but much worse is when you stay somewhere that calls itself baby-friendly, when in fact it’s not. Needless to say, this is how I felt as we set off for Crete this summer. The 3am alarm call for our flight did not help! Thankfully, baby Ana fell asleep on me for most of the flight, which is just three hours, and I started to relax despite feeling shattered. Once we arrived at Daios Cove, the friendly reception staff offered to show us to the 360-degree viewing deck, and I could feel myself grumble internally as I dreamed of falling into a nice, soft bed. But as we walked out, drink in hand, it became clear why they showed guests this on arrival. My tiredness miraculously disappeared and I got that sudden buzz of excitement as I realised we were “on holiday”!

Daios Cove is a bit of a hidden gem. Not only for its beauty, but because of how well it caters for families. As the staff showed us to our room, I was impressed by the attention to detail, as everything including a cot, buggy, high chair, bath toys, cutlery and even a bottle steriliser are all on hand. They had catered to our daughter’s every need. Our deluxe sea-view room was spacious, with a king-size bed, marble fitted bathroom, sofa area and even an audio system in the toilet. The hotel has 300 rooms, villas and suites and most of them feature a private pool and large decking area, perfect for privacy and for letting your little one take a few tentative strokes if, like ours, they’re still a bit nervous in the water. Daios Cove is set in a secluded, private cove, overlooking the sparkling azure Mediterranean. The intimate layout provides an instant feeling of serenity. The show-stopping signature piece is the funicular railway, which smoothly slides up and down the clifftop, transporting guests around the resort while November 201 8

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“ THE SHOW-STOPPING SIGNATURE PIECE IS THE FUNICULAR RAILWAY, WHICH SMOOTHLY SLIDES UP AND DOWN THE CLIFF TOP”

allowing them to admire the stunning views. Sounds horrible so far, right? It gets worse. At the bottom of the hill cove is a private beach that’s particularly popular with families. It isn’t huge, but the sea is warm and shallow, there are plenty of beds and a well-stocked beach bar for plenty of snacks and refreshments. There’s much to keep mama entertained, too, with a spa that includes an indoor salt-water infinity pool boasting sea views, plus fitness studios, a second pool with hydro jets, a Finnish sauna, chromatherapy showers, a hairdressing salon and a beauty studio. There are also sporting options ranging from water activities (water-skiing, pedalos, canoeing, scuba diving) to Pilates and yoga. You can be as active or as inactive as you like; we actually didn’t end up leaving the resort, but should you wish to, Crete

has many more stunning beaches, unique heritage sites and bustling towns – plus at Daios Cove you are only a short drive away from the local town, Agios Nikolaos in Lasithi, home to the fortress of Spinalonga. Back at the resort, we started to wonder about entertainment for the little ones. That’s where the kids’ club comes in. All young guests are invited to attend the resort’s Creche Club (serving littles from four months to four years) or Children’s Club (four to 12 years), both of which are run by a team of childcare experts qualified to UK standards and regulations. The clubs offer a full activity programme (including talent shows and evening pyjama parties while parents enjoy an evening meal), so after a little consideration and a quick chat with the team, on day two we (rather guiltily) dropped Ana off at at the crèche for the morning session and we headed off to the spa. We didn’t hold back: I got the full-body massage and spent an hour in the sauna, before relaxing by the pool.

Three hours later, when we arrived (feeling very relaxed) to find a happy and rested baby, I was a convert, and immediately booked the crèche again. Having the opportunity to get just one or two mornings to relax while on holiday is a game-changer for me, and a kids’ club is something I will look out for with future holidays. In terms of food, there is an impressive buffet breakfast served in the Pangea restaurant. It includes cooked staples and Cretan specialities, including syrupy local jams, plus all your usual hot and cold dishes, from cereals to pancakes, and so on. There are even separate dining rooms for families, which means your baby can happily drop all her food on the floor and no one minds. They offer a kids’ buffet from 6-7pm. Other restaurants include Ocean, which offers sophisticated Mediterranean cuisine, and Taverna, a Greek restaurant with the most spectacular views over the cove. As our time at Daios Cove drew to a close, I reflected on my initial anxieties. Although holidays have changed since we became parents, this unique resort really did allow us to feel like “us”, as travellers, again. It combines top facilities, extraordinary beauty and luxury, all supported by complete family friendliness. You can’t hope for more than that.

R O O M R AT E S Nightly rates in a Deluxe Sea View Room start from €250 (£221*) on a half-board basis. For further details and to book, visit daioscove.com or call +44 20 3036 0257. *Prices according to exchange rate at the time of writing. November 201 8

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TRY DETOXING WITH LIKE-MINDED MAMAS IN AZERBAIJAN’S CHENOT PALACE GABALA

All by

Ourselves

The founder of Kensington Mums gives us ten reasons why she recommends you go on a mums-only holiday – and soon… W o r d s D I N A M A K TA B I

eing Mum is one of the hardest yet most rewarding jobs in the world, but so little time is devoted to actually exploring what we need in order to achieve our potential for our little ones and ourselves. As mothers, we are skilled at multi-tasking, but we are especially skilled at putting ourselves last. We prioritise our kids’ and family’s needs ahead of our own, and we constantly look out for others, neglecting to replenish ourselves. We too often forget to fit our own oxygen masks first. You may recently have seen that the Kensington Mums team went on a beautiful trip to Greece. Why was this journey so noteworthy? It was a mums-only holiday. It also happened to coincide with my birthday – and it was the perfect present.

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ONLY

FEAST ON CYPRIOT CUISINE AT THE ELYSIUM, PAPHOS

3. You get to loosen up and be the “real you”, and let off some steam by just having fun and doing the things you enjoy most. 4. You enjoy being around other like-minded mums, especially if they’re close friends. It helps you to have more fun and, most importantly, in being you! Enjoying yourself, laughing and talking about anything you like (only sometimes about the kids) is a fantastic feeling. 5. You don’t feel any kind of guilt. It’s very important for a mother to look after herself, her wellness and her wellbeing. It is not selfish; it is a necessity. So here are 6. You get to sleep! my top reasons Enough said. why I would 7. You take leave strongly recommend from your parenting taking a mums-only role. This means holiday yourself… while on my recent XXXXX XX XXX XXX XXXXXX DINA MAKTABI, FOUNDER 1. You get to reconnect, mums-only holiday, I OF KENSINGTON MUMS reset and repair. Our did not: clean, cook, bribe, lives are overcrowded and or break up fights, clean dirty overscheduled and this means there noses or wipe any bottoms. The is very little time for yourself. Motherhood is only thing I enjoyed doing was capturing 24/7, demanding and you are always on-theevery moment. go. This is your time, to take care of you. 8. You get to rediscover a new or lost hobby 2. You learn to reflect and reconnect with or sport. yourself, set priorities for important things in 9. You get to create happy memories for your life and reassess things that are going yourself, and that’s a wonderful thing to wrong. In our modern, fast-paced world, our invest in. mind is a busy one, with so many tabs open 10. And last but not least – I know I’ve at the same time. Being on holiday offers that already said this, but it can’t be said enough – quiet space for reflection and self-exploration, you get to be you. Not mummy you, nor wifey something that is hard to do in your daily you, but the person that is really you. mummy routine. Getting away on a mums-only holiday does wonders for you, your sanity, BOOK THE ESCAPADA EXPERIENCE IN MALLORCA THIS COMING JUNE your equilibrium and your family, too. Of course you miss your offspring – but then coming home to them is something to look forward to. I was reenergised and ready for the back-to-school routine and chaos. Just remember: there’s no such thing as a perfect mother; we are all doing our best. You should live to your own expectations and no one else’s.

THREE t o T RY Gather your friends together, put the rest of your family on duty, and book one of these mum-friendly retreats…

Chenot Palace Gabala AZERBAIJAN

The seven-day Advanced Detox Henri Chenot Programme is perfect for a mums-only break. Set in the gorgeous hills of Gabala, Azerbaijan, the retreat includes three consultations, two nutrition sessions, a detoxifying diet and assessment of oxidative stress, vascular age stiffness and skin collagen analysis. Each itinerary comprises Hydro-Jet and Phyto-Mud treatments. €3,400 per person; chenotpalace .com/en

The Elysium CYPRUS

This luxe five-star hotel, based in the ancient city of Paphos, has launched the A Taste of Cyprus Package that’s ideally suited to mums in need of R&R. During a five-night stay, you not only get the chance to indulge in plenty of local cuisine, but cook it, too. Two classes led by the hotel’s chefs are thrown in, and you’ll learn to make delicious Cypriot specialties. From €1,174 per room, based on two sharing; elysium-hotel .com/en

The Escapada Experience MALLORCA

From 1-4 June 2019, this mummy-only retreat invites tired, under-pampered mamas to unplug and rebalance. Alternative beauty treatments, expert consultations, ayurvedic cuisine, cooking demonstrations, local excursions, daily yoga, meditation and acupuncture are all included, while you learn to get your self-care routines back on track. From £850 per person; escapadaretreat .com/ mummyshealthretreat 2019

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UK GETAWAY

T H E G R OV E HOTEL H E RT FO R D S H I R E

For family-friendly luxury that’s hardly outside London Wo r d s PE N D L E H A R T E

there are special events galore, ranging from rounders and football to arts and crafts, jewellery making and even a display of birds of prey. In summer, a fake beach (the sand is real) is strewn with deckchairs and buckets and spades. For adults, there’s an impressive spa and gym, too. So leave your children in safe hands while you enjoy some free time and then take them to dinner – this is a very family-friendly place.

THE HOTEL

espite having the look and feel of a country house hotel, The Grove is practically in the city. It may take a leap of faith for the average Londoner to consider Watford as a minibreak destination, but even after travelling here by Overground with our Oyster cards, psychologically we are almost in Devon. Lying by a pool in the sunshine watching a casual game of beach volleyball on the sand next to us isn’t what you’d expect from Watford.

THE ROOM

large balcony, vast and comfortable bed, a luxurious bathroom fully equipped with towels and bathrobes (even in child sizes). The aesthetic is modern and angular, with a focus on slightly odd art installations. Along the corridors, hollow perspex tables are filled with rubber ducks, or feathers, or watering can roses.

THE FOOD

ndecisive? Dinner at The Glasshouse is for you. This buffet restaurant offers food from all over the globe – and you can mix it up as you like. Start with sushi, salad or tapas, move on to roast beef

and Yorkshire pudding, gnocchi or design your own stir-fry in the Asian section. Pudding options are cleverly designed in miniature.

W H AT T O D O

ctivities for children are endless. On arrival our two – aged nine and 12 – head off on a treasure hunt, following clues around the hotel. Borrow a bike – or a Segway – and tour the 300-acre grounds, in which you’ll find giant games of Jenga and Connect 4. There’s an indoor kids’ pool, as well as a marvellous (and slightly heated) outdoor pool, and in school holidays

Double rooms in October start at £251.

TH E G ROV E H OTE L The Grove, Chandler’s Cross, Hertfordshire, WD3 4TG; thegrove.co.uk November 201 8

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‘ Enjoying childhood and realising our imagination.’ “My time at Dallington has helped me to grow in body, mind and soul – this is something that I am immeasurably grateful for. Dallington has given me a push in the direction of success and I am thankful for all they have done. I will do the best I can to repay them, the best I can, by leading an honest and digniﬁed life.” – Nick (Year 6 pupil) Dallington is a family-run co-educational independent school, with a nursery, in the heart of London. Personal tours each day of the week, except Wednesday.

Headteacher, Proprietor and Founder: Mogg Hercules MBE Email: hercules@dallingtonschool.co.uk Phone: 020 7251 2284 www.dallingtonschool.co.uk

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A S K T H E E X P E R T S p10 4 • TO P TOT G E A R p10 9 • T H E FO U R T Y P E S O F S C R E E N T I M E p1 10

Starry Nights •ADEN + ANAIS •

For breathable, soft and yet durable muslin swaddles, we turn to aden + anais every time. We’re currently crushing on the silky midnight set that’s just a little bit seasonal, but still neutral enough to be used year-round even as a stroller cover, burp cloth, nursing cover and more. That’s the kind of investment we like. £25.20; adenandanais.co.uk

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Adele MARIE

Adele Marie is from Ego Hair, Queen’s Park’s favourite salon... egohair.co.uk

What can I do about hair loss? After many years of losing my own hair and being a hairdresser, I have helped lots of people with hair loss problems. There are many things you can do to cure hair loss, including taking these supplements and foods, which I recommend... Biotin is without doubt the best thing you will ever take for your hair. It comes in 1,000 or 5,000mcg. I recommend the latter as this gives you fast results. It can be taken even if you’re breastfeeding, if you have an underactive thyroid, have had chemo or any illness. Biotin is totally safe and, best of all, vegan. Vitamin D3 helps with many things, including overall health, and balances out your immune system. I Q A

Ask the

EXPERTS Q

Parenting and medical professionals, as well as leading entrepreneurs, answer some of your most pressing questions 1 04

“BIOTIN IS WITHOUT A DOUBT THE BEST THING YOU WILL EVER TAKE FOR YOUR HAIR AND CAN BE TAKEN WHEN YOU’RE BREASTFEEDING” recommend you take 4,000IU daily. Vitamin B complex pretty much helps boost your mind, your body and will make you feel amazing. You just need to take one per day. Blueberries are listed as a superfood and it’s well known they help with hair loss – they are good for your skin and your body, too. Cucumber will make your hair grow thick, shiny and fast. Avocado is full of fatty acids and is without doubt the best. You only need one or two per week.

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Heather MORRIS

Heather Morris is a registered general nurse and state-certified midwife. She is also mum to Freddy, Harry and Jack. metanium.co.uk

Can nappy rash be prevented? No matter how careful you are, most babies are likely to get nappy rash at some time. Nappy rash is usually mild and can be managed with a good skincare routine and a barrier ointment. Taking care of your baby’s delicate skin is essential in both treating and preventing nappy rash. These simple steps will help: • Lie your baby on a towel and leave your baby’s nappy off as often as you can, to let fresh air get to the skin. Q A

• Change wet or soiled nappies as soon as possible. • Clean the nappy area thoroughly using plain water or alcohol- and fragrance-free wipes. • Don’t use talcum powder as it contains ingredients that could irritate your baby’s skin. • Try to bath your baby every day, but don’t use soap or bubble bath. • Gently pat rather than rub your baby’s bottom dry and avoid vigorous rubbing. • Use a suitable barrier ointment at each nappy change. Most mild cases of nappy rash can be easily treated with an ointment from your pharmacy and by following this skincare routine, but if you are worried always seek the advice of a healthcare professional.

“NAPPY RASH CAN BE MANAGED WITH A GOOD SKINCARE ROUTINE AND A BARRIER OINTMENT” Finally, it comes down to style. At Urban Iki, we’ve created a range of simple and attractive designs that can also be personalised to suit people’s own sense of creativity.

Ronald SCHEPPINK

Ronald is the Managing Director of Urban Iki and tells us about safety in cycling for kids. u rbaniki.com Q What should parents look for in a child bike seat? A As a parent, you want to focus on the experience of cycling with your child and simply have fun. The best way to focus on enjoying yourselves is to have a bike seat that you know you can trust and that is easy to use. Once parents have found a brand that they trust, they should look at what works best for them and their children. For instance, a front seat is only for children aged between nine months and three years, whereas a rear seat goes from nine months to six years – so a choice has to made there.

Q How do bike seats ensure safety when cycling with kids? A The fi rst thing a parent can do is check that the seat meets the necessary safety regulations. If it has been TUV-tested and approved, you know you’re buying a safe seat. You can choose a seat with a five-point safety seatbelt instead of a three-point. The five-point harness prevents children from wriggling out from under the seatbelt and offers that extra layer of confidence. Th is harness also allows parents to lock and adjust the seatbelt with one hand while keeping the bicycle steady with the other. If it’s easy to fit, then it will be a safe fit. Always check if the bicycle is in good shape and if it’s able to carry the extra load. In the manuals that come with our seats we give some extra safety pointers, so every bike ride can be a real adventure.

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REVIEW

BUD BOOSTER SEAT with Detachable Tray £49 Reviewed by Nicky Chow of the Mamas & Papas Parent Approved Panel @wonky_chic

esigned for babies already sitting unaided and with weaning in mind, the booster seat can be strapped to most chairs. It’s ergonomic, hard in all the right places, soft where it needs to be and can be cleaned easily. It comes in soft grey and white, which not only spoke to our tastes, but sang to us in euphoric accord – something like Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer” being played at a wedding! As a play seat on the floor with the activity tray attachment, Aoibhe loves it. She loves playing with the different toys on offer and we love the fact that it’s secured in the lip of the tray with clever hidden suckers, so she can’t throw it across the room! This can buy us 20 minutes or more! It’s also usually the first item Aoibhe’s friends head for when they are over for playdates. We also took to the streets and trialled the Baby Bud at a restaurant. The chair itself is very light (1.6kg), however by its very nature it can’t help but be chunky. We managed to fit it in the basket, but only just.

LION PLAYMAT & GYM by Offspring £69

the other a squeaker. These were great fun for Koda as he has really active legs and loves to kick. I hear the crunchy tail all day long but every now and then he would kick the squeaker and wonder where the noise came from; then he’d tire himself out trying e’ve been using the new to do it again. lion playmat for the last We are now practising sitting up three weeks and it’s and the playmat has been a great useful in so many ways! help as it’s so padded and the slightly Originally, I set it up with the bars raised element makes a nice cushion and hanging toys but very quickly support when he wobbles forward. noticed that Koda’s favourite thing to Koda is a very big baby so I like that do on it was to use his monkey feet to the playmat is more of a wedge than a play with the toys and then to fold the circle. With his previous one he didn’t bars down, which I didn’t mind; I saw fit on it at any angle as he was too long, it as a fun challenge for him. He but on this one his legs don’t even then learned how to roll and, reach the bottom of the tails! as this was his new trick, he At first I was sceptical Keep up with wouldn’t stop rolling and about the colours in our the latest views kept rolling into the bars light, white-and-blue and reviews from the Mamas & Papas Parent and getting stuck! living room; but in Approved Panellists at I removed the bars person they’re nice and mamasandpapas.com/ and attached the little bright and have really parent-approvedpanel hanging toys to the grown on me. The little wedged part of the mat on red strawberry is Koda’s the available loops. This really favourite... and mine! Our encouraged him to enjoy tummy living room isn’t the biggest but time a bit more and gave him room to the playmat fits nicely into the middle roll. The mat is slightly raised, which of the room and can be easily folded also helped his love for rolling and up and stored away when he goes to tummy time. bed. All the toys can be removed, too, The bottom of the mat has several so we can take them with us to the multi-coloured tails, one has a crunchy supermarket and Koda can feel like noise to it, another a rattle noise and he hasn’t left his mat behind. Reviewed by Patrizia O’Shaughnessy of the Mamas & Papas Parent Approved Panel @lifewithkodabear

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EVER AFTER

TOT GE AR

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JU-JU-BE

We’re big fans of the “Ever” range of vegan leather bags from hip changing bag brand Ju-Ju-Be. The Ever Weekender is seriously chic, and still spacious enough to carry all your parenting essentials, from nappies and wipes to bottles and snacks. A strong contender for the first spot on Mama’s Christmas list. £160; europe. ju-ju-be.com

TOT GEAR PUMP IT UP

Practical kit for easier parenting

P U M PA B L E S

Offering three hours of pumping time on a single charge, plus whisper-quiet operation and a handy timer, there’s little wonder that Pumpables’ stylish Milk Genie breast pump won best new breast pump 2017. Efficient and elegant, this is one prenatal investment that won’t disappoint. £80; pumpables.co

SMALL IS BE AUTIFUL SMOL

This is brilliant: the world’s most effective concentrated washing capsules delivered to your door at a fraction of the price of high street brands. Chemically formulated to be kind as well as powerful, they come in sustainable, letterboxfriendly packaging. £3.85 for 24; smolproducts.co.uk

H O L I DAY DOUBLE STROLLER B R I TA X R O E M E R

Wo r d s H E L E N B A R O N

oliday strollers have become big business of late, with lightweight models like the BabyZen YoYo and GB Pokit becoming many urban parents’ everyday buggy of choice. But a double holiday buggy always seemed like an impossible dream. Until now. A side-by-side double stroller, the Britax-Roemer Holiday Double offers the comfort and ease of use of a classic umbrella model – but with a revolutionary fold. The Holiday Double has been cleverly designed to fold neatly in half with a couple of clicks of the special handlebar mechanism. Once folded, it locks shut, taking up little more space than a single holiday stroller. It’s not quite small enough to be stowed on a flight as cabin baggage, but it remains a lot more practical to transport than any other double buggy we’ve encountered. Handy carry straps and superlightweight construction make it easy to carry on your shoulder, too. You’d think such a buggy would come with some serious drawbacks, but the disadvantages are so slight as to render them meaningless. We’re impressed. £200; amazon.co.uk

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2. COMMUNICATIVE SCREEN TIME

Dig ital

DECODE Elizabeth Tweedale, CEO of CypherCoders, describes the four types of screen time and each of their pros and cons

s parents, we are bombarded with “good advice”: Don’t let your kids eat this, eat more of that, spend quality time with them, make sure they run a mile a day... One recurrent piece of advice is about screen time – and generally we’re told it shouldn’t be very long each day. But what exactly do we mean by screen time? It’s useful to identify the four different types, and whether they have a generally positive or potentially negative effect on our children...

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1. CREATIVE SCREEN TIME

he most positive of screen times. This is about making music, creating digital art or editing videos. It can be a collaborative act or hinge on a single creator, but it is developing genuine skills and crafting something that has the potential to be shared or performed. The substance of what is made is important; the quality of the software and learning the skills to use it help the enjoyment. This is an almost limitless area for learning – and will become significantly more relevant to future generations.

really important one. The use of email has almost wiped out letter-writing, but it is often poorly used and underestimated. Etiquette, grammar and structure are no less relevant in emails – and practise can help to prevent misunderstandings. FaceTime and Skype have been great for keeping in touch with grandmas and family members. The visual link gives a stronger sense of being in the presence of someone else. Other apps such as WhatsApp and SnapChat allow kids to keep in touch and compare notes (sometimes “What are you wearing this weekend?” but also, more usefully, “What is our history homework?”).

3. ACTIVE SCREEN TIME

est summed up as gaming and searching. Games cover a wide range of subjects, styles, age-appropriateness and effects. Violent games are always negative for kids. Some games, however, offer real benefits, such as increasing handeye coordination, developing logic or encouraging kids to actually get physical (see Wii Tennis). Searching can be useful for homework or for “social grazing”, on Instagram for instance.

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Viewing a constant stream of Instagram posts with the associated FOMO (fear of missing out) can absorb teenagers for a surprising amount of time.

4. PASSIVE SCREEN TIME

his is watching TV – something we have come to accept as a background activity and relaxing for adults. But good television can be highly influential, beneficial and worth seeking out and watching together – see Blue Planet, Shakespeare, Horrible Histories, Bake Off or Springwatch. Some programmes have little benefit to kids and they’d be better off kicking a ball around. Some educational programmes have positive stimulation – but the TV should never be used as a babysitter or pacifier.

THERE ARE P OSITIVE S

Building modern skills. Digital skills are essential for pretty much all future careers – learning the skills of communication and coding now will equip kids to succeed in an as yet unpredictable future. Digital citizenship. Being fluent in media and communication skills enables our children to be engaged members of the community. Education. Learning and creativity are benefits of the right sort of digital activity – and can be found in all sorts of different measures in all four types of screen time. Finding a like-minded group. Finding friends who have the same outlook on life or similar interests can make young people feel less alone.

“MAKI N G M USI C OR DIG I TA L A RT IS T H E M OST P OSI T I V E OF SCREEN T I M ES”

AND NEGATIVE S

Behavioural issues. Too much screen time – or the wrong kind – can often lead to problems with attention and concentration in children. Childhood obesity. It’s a time-bomb and well reported – using screens too frequently can deter kids from getting out and getting active. Anti-social behaviour. There are incidents of bullying online – this can occur both in active screen time, for instance online games, and in communicative screen time, where kids can suffer from negative, harmful and upsetting comments. Loneliness. It has been reported that children can feel a sense of isolation or low self-confidence when they see “everyone else having fun” – as mature adults we may be able to be cycnical about Instagram posts, but it’s very hard for young minds to process this in a balanced way.

WHAT CAN PARENTS DO?

Be a parent in the digital world just the way you are in the real world. Help your kids to navigate digital media, talk, listen and share experiences; let them be part of your screen time and vice versa. For example: ask them about their games; ask to learn how to play; create something together; use your screen time to find a recipe or instructions for a craft project and make it together; FaceTime granny as a family; have a movie night so that you share and discuss even in “passive” mode; talk about technology and screens you see when you’re out and about together. Most importantly, lead by example. Set up boundaries that apply to you and the children, have digital-free times, or digital-free areas, set curfews for phone and screen usage, put all your phones in a basket for “off-grid hour”. The best way for children to learn is from your example.

“ T H E B EST WAY F OR C H I L D R E N TO L EARN AB O U T SC R E E N TIME IS F R O M YO U R E X A MPL E”

But don’t over-limit. Okay, this may sound crazy but we do need to get real about screen time and what it means. At school, kids may be on their iPads doing really constructive, creative work. There may be useful research they need to do for homework or to pursue a hobby, and there is no real limit to the amount of screen time for our types 1 and 2 – Creative and Communicative – within the capacity to avoid eyestrain and with the caveat that time is used responsibly and monitored. If we over-limit screen time, kids may be unprepared for education, where exams are likely to be on computers. Touch typing is a valuable asset and navigating the digital world is a positive benefit. Just be aware of what your child is doing on a screen, and be hypersensitive to the moods and behaviour post-screen time. Ensure you are being realistic in the context of the modern world, and discount productive, useful screen time from their daily limit. Your mantra for screen time might become: Measured, Monitored, Meaningful. November 201 8

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Henry Fawcett Community Nursery (Leaf ) Clayton St, London SE11 5BZ 020 7582 0509

to know Mama’s guide to London’s best nurseries and preschools

Base Zero Nursery Happy Days 109A Randlesdown Rd, Gramsci Way, London, SE6 3HB 020 8461 3510 The Villa 54 Lyndhurst Grove, London SE15 5AH 0207 703 6216 Chairbears Day Nursery 9-12 Deptford Broadway, London SE84PA 020 8305 6588

SOUT H W EST N O RTH WEST

NORTH

E AST

North Bridge House Nursery School/Pre-Prep 33 Fitzjohn’s Ave, Camden Town, London NW3 5JY 020 7267 6266

Les Trois Oursons 4 Collins Yard, London N1 2XU 020 7099 0452

Hatching Dragon Nursery School 1 Viscount St, London EC1Y 0AA 020 7256 9365

Little Stars Nursery 58 Allen Rd, Stoke Newington, London N16 8RZ 020 7254 4367

Sahan Preschool Day Nursery 12 Stukeley Rd, London, E7 9QZ 020 3719 7002

The Mulberry House School 7 Minster Road, London, NW2 3SD 020 8452 7340 Living Spring Montessori St Michael’s Church Annexe, St Michael’s Road, London, NW2 6XG 020 8830 7331 Nuffy Bear Nursery Brondesbury Park Fitness & Wellbeing Centre, Sidmouth Road, London, NW2 5JY 020 3432 8708

Sylvia's Happy Childcare 119a Chevening Road, London, NW6 6DU 020 8960 2217

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Puddleducks Nurseries Puddleducks House, r/o 75 Friern Barnet Road, London NW3 5JY 020 7267 6266 Hackney Care For Kids 61 Evering Rd, London N16 7PR 020 7923 3471 William Patten Daycare Nursery William Patten School, Stoke Newington Church St, Stoke Newington, London N16 0NX 020 3844 4227 Creative Explorers Day Nursery 18 Gisburn Rd, London N8 7BS 07956 809748

Oliver Thomas Nursery School 1 Mathews Ave, London, E6 6BU 020 8552 1177

The Lyceum Nursery 6 Paul Street, City of London, London, EC2A 4JH registrar@lyceumschool.co.uk lyceumschool.co.uk 020 7247 1588

SOUT H E AST Dulwich Montessori Nursery School St Stephen’s Church, College Road, Dulwich, London SE21 7HN 0208 766 0091

Eaton Square Nursery School, Belgravia 28 & 30 Eccleston Street, London SW1W 9PY Eaton Square Nursery School, Knightsbridge Rutland Gardens, London SW7 1BX Eaton Square Nursery School, Pimlico 32a Lupus Street, London SW1V 3DZ nursery@eatonsquareschool.com eatonsquareschool.com 020 7931 9469 The Knightsbridge Kindergarten St Peter’s Church, 119 Eaton Square, London SW1W 9AL 020 7371 2306 The Willcocks Nursery School Holy Trinity With All Saints Church, Prince Consort Road, London, SW7 2BA 020 7584 5054 Melrose House 55 Finlay St, Fulham SW6 6HF 020 7736 9296

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reso urces DIRECTORY

Hatching Dragons Westminster Units 3&4 Westminster Quarter, 2 Monck street, London, SW1P 2BQ 0203 912 2902 Tadpoles Nursery School 68 Park Walk, Chelsea, London SW10 0NQ 020 7352 9757 The Barnes Village Nursery 3A Station Rd, London SW13 0LP 020 8878 5111 Gwendolen House 39 Gwendolen Ave SW15 6EH 0203 441 2450 London Early Years Foundation 121 Marsham St, Westminster, London SW1P 4LX 020 7834 8679 One World Nursery 9 Knowle Cl, London SW9 0TQ 020 7924 9505 Dee’s Day Nursery (Wimbledon) 2 Mansel Rd, Wimbledon, London SW19 4AA 020 8944 0284 Learning Ladders Nursery Ground Floor, Falkner Court, Francis Chichester Way, London SW11 5HX 020 7622 9300 Kiddi Caru Day Nursery 2 Piazza Buildings Empress State, London SW6 1TW 0207 386 4505 Tiggers Nursery School, Putney 87 Putney Bridge Rd, London SW15 2PA 020 8874 4668 Wee Ones Nursery 4 St Ann’s Cresent, London SW18 2LR 0208 870 7729

The Orchard Day Nursery 201-203 The Broadway, Wimbledon, London, SW19 1NL 020 3880 7373 Tiny Thinkers Childcare 192 Tudor Drive, Kingston upon Thames KT2 5QG 0203 441 2450

W EST Little Chepstow Nursery 108 Lancaster Road, W11 1QS 0207 243 0243 Rolfe’s Nursery School The Little House, 34a Oxford Gardens, London, W10 5UQ 020 8969 5805 New Studio Pre-School Kelfield Mews, Kelfield Gardens, London, W10 6LS 020 8969 5805 Denbigh Under Fives Group 5b Denbigh Road, Denbigh Road, London, W11 2SJ 020 7221 5318 Kids Unlimited 34 Ladbroke Grove, London W11 3BQ 0845 365 2918 St Peter’s Nursery School 59a Portobello Road, London W11 3DB 020 7243 2617 Ladbroke Square Montessori School 43 Ladbroke Square, London W11 3ND 020 7229 0125 The Square School 18 Holland Park Avenue, London W11 3QU 020 7221 6004 Holland Park Nursery School Kenley Walk Hall, Kenley Walk, London W11 4BA 020 7792 0323

Jack in the Box Kelmscott Community Hall, Ashchurch Grove, White City, London W12 9BT 020 8811 8099 Stepping Stones Nursery 5 Gayford Road, London W12 9BY 020 8811 1646 Bright Sparks Montessori School 142 Sinclair Road, London, W14 0NL 020 7371 4697

Caterpillar Montessori PO Box 105 11 London W4 5WU W4 5LG 020 8747 8531 Maggie and Rose 55 Finlay St, Fulham SW6 6HF 020 7736 9296 Millie’s House Nursery and Pre-School Distillery Lane, Fulham Reach W6 9US 020 8748 4303

Vanessa Nursery 12 Cathnor Road, London W12 6JA 020 8743 8196

Windham Nursery School Windham Road, Richmond, Surrey, London TW9 2HP 0208 831 6060

Little Owls Nursery 108 Lakeside Rd, London W14 0DY 020 3266 0044

Merchant Square Day Nursery 13 Harbet Rd, Paddington, London W2 1AJ 020 7402 2227

The Kensington Kindergarten St Barnabas Church, 23 Addison Rd, Kensington, London W14 8LH 020 7371 4848

Busy Bees at Hammersmith 3 Bute Gardens, London W6 7DR 0208 741 9945

Millie’s House Nursery and Pre-School Distillery Ln, London W6 9PL 020 8748 4303 One World Montessori and Pre-Preparatory 69 - 71 Brook Green, London W6 7BE 020 7603 6065 Little Cherubs Nursery School Our Lady Of Victories Church Hall, 16a Abingdon Road, London W8 6AF 07810 712241

The Corner House Day Nursery 82 Lavington Rd, London W13 9LR 020 8567 2806 Bunny Park Day Nursery & Nursery School 37 Manor Court Rd, London W7 3EJ 020 8567 6142 Hatching Dragons Twickenham 2 The Green, Twickenham, London, TW2 5AA 0203 912 2901

Carmelite Parish Centre Pitt Street W8 4JH 07810 712241 Iverna Gardens Montessori Nursery School Armenian Church Hall, Iverna Gardens, London W8 6TP 020 7937 0794

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r es ou rc es EDUCATION

Push the

Boundaries One Headmistress explains the importance of letting children make their own decisions

W o r d s P H I L I P PA C AW T H O R N E

asic skills such as learning to hold and eat from a spoon are acquired through repeated effort (and mess). If we came to the rescue every time food failed to make it into our baby’s mouth, we’d spoon-feed them forever. A study of 400 children over eight years revealed that toddlers with the most controlling mothers had poorer social skills and academic performance at the age of 10, and that excessive adult intervention can result in passive, unmotivated and anxious young people deprived of the long-term ability to make their own decisions.

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So, research suggests nagging kids to do homework may end up doing them more harm than good; if you allow them to choose not to do it, they have to go to school and face the consequences – a lesson in itself. When Bassett House was founded in 1947, Sylvia Rentoul was a pioneer in using Montessori methods, teaching children to think and behave independently from an early age. We still use these methods in our nursery classes, where you’ll find our threeand four-year-olds expected to hang up their coats, wash up after activities and choose the learning opportunities they engage with. We believe that children learn more effectively when they are encouraged to do

things for themselves, to think creatively and form their own ideas. A “can do” attitude and growth mindset are in Bassett’s DNA. If you were to say “I can’t do that” to one of our pupils they would inevitably bellow back “YET”. This mantra, often repeated at assemblies, has become a shorthand for understanding that resilience and perseverance pay off. It’s embedded in every aspect of school life. Our children are encouraged to do their own research, argue their own points of view and problem-solve. They discover their opinions matter and feel free to step out of their comfort zone when faced with new challenges. Outside the classroom, our wide range of clubs, enrichment activities and residential trips allow children to push their boundaries and let their imaginations soar. Leadership and team-building skills are encouraged with a host of club activities such as sports, orienteering, martial arts and drama, while experiences such as rigging a boat, cooking on a campfire and building shelters in the wild are the character-building stuff our residential trips are made of. If you consider how much your child has control over, you realise how few real decisions they get to make. We encourage you to ask your child if there are things they’d like to be in charge of. We adults can help them make the right decision by discussing each choice, and we can point out it’s a good idea to have a Plan B. Yes, sometimes it’s good to let them go out without a coat, or turn up at school without the correct kit. Good decisions take practise. And they need to experience the natural consequences of their decisions.

P H I L I P PA C AW T H O R N E Headmistress of Bassett House School bassetths.org.uk

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