The Times of Molly | Aug 1, 2020

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SQUAD & CO. PRINT PRESS | ESTABLISHED 1997 | SATURDAY, AUGUST 1, 2020 | PAGES 4 | PRICE : $$$

THE TIMES OF MOLLY SMOLLY KNOWS BEST

Ask Molly - a poem by Maryann Oliver

There once was a girl named Mallika, But all her babies call her Molly yeah! She came along with a twin Polly, together with their didi, Mama & Papa Lahiry, They completed the Lahiry Family. Little Smoll was a part of more than one family, Especially her squad from Chennai and 6C! where she plays an integral part, while we hold her in all of our hearts. When we have a doubt we say - ask Molly! Cause she's not just jolly, But also quite scholarly. Now she might not know to swim or ride a bike. But she sure can prove herself right! If you’re having a bad day, just talk to Molly. If she can't console you with her words, She will try sending some desserts. But at the end of day she’ll make sure, that your forlorn heart she has cured. If you’re having a good day, just talk to Molly. She’ll make your good day - great! and make you wonder how the world has hate. For friends like Molly are hard to come by, and once she does, forever she’ll be your Ally!

INDIA’S SMOLLEST ENGLISH NEWSPAPER

Mallika Lahiry turns 23: Dubai’s Burj Khalifa lights up with a birthday wish from squad. - reported by Anushma Patwal

“It actually was not that hard to pull off, we were just out of time and this seemed the easiest thing to do” - ANONYMOUS MEMBER OF SQUAD Mallika, most commonly known as Molly is the most sort after friend for advice in the squad. Today she and her beautiful twin sister, Pallavi(Polly)celebrate their 23rd birthday along with their family in their Gurgaon home in DLF Ph-1. Although her friends can’t be with her today due to the Coronavirus pandemic they have been sending in love through social media posts and what’sapp messages. Her squad being the Extra group of people that they are decided to do something different and sent in their wish by lighting up her name on Dubai’s Burj Khalifa followed by a light and water show. “It actually was not that hard to pull off, we were just out of time and this seemed the easiest thing to do”, says one of the squad member who wishes to remain unnamed.

Screen-time a subject of concern, Mallika vows to reform habits - Investigated by George Thomas

Chennai: In the 34th canteen round table conference that was held on Friday the squad council adressed the burning issue of the detrimental effects of increasing screen time on squad relations and eyesight. Mallika's statement was deemed hypocritical by some members of the council, owing to her dark past of online shopping. Nevertheless, Mallika stood strong by her statement and also elaborated "I agree, that was a dark phase of my life. But it shouldn't prevent me or the squad from taking steps towards a better tomorrow." While councilman George is usually on the offensive to Mallika's policies, he made a point to justify Mallika's past stating "She's only human after all. It's a hole I've dug myself deep into in the past and she would need the council's support to get through these dark times" George also suprised the council by standing by Mallika's new Screen-time Reduction & Integration Program (STRIP) and described the policy as "Noice".

PS: I wanted a good title, but I couldn’t ask Molly. From left: Aadya Dev, her secretary Saurabh kodan, Her Highness Ms. Mallika Lahiry and Niranjana Nair (dealer of Fairy dust asia pacific head)

The council will conduct a detailed investigation to understand Mallika's shady past which will decide the fate of Mallika's STRIP.


The future is here:

Smolly’s Molly

Smolly’s Molly, also known simply as Molly, is a virtual assistant AI technology developed by Leo’s Mate, first used in the Leo’s Mate Echo smart speakers developed by Leo’s Mate Lab126. It is capable of voice interaction, keeping in touch with close ones, A-Z Information on Colour-Pop, Planning North-Indian trips, setting alarms, discipline, and providing weather facts, traffic information (medium), sports (not so much), and other real-time information, such as news in general. Molly can also control several smart people using itself as a home cuteness system. Users are able to extend the Molly capabilities by installing "FACTS" (an additional functionality developed by third-party vendors, in other settings more commonly called MOLLS such as Fact programs and singing-on-birthday features). Most devices with Molly allow users to activate the device using a wake-word (such as “Hello Molly”) other devices (such as the Leo’s Mate mobile app on

- by Karan Jacob

iOS or Android and Leo’s Mate Dash Wand) require the user to shout “Its Molly’s Birthday” to activate Molly's listening mode, although, some phones also allow a user to say a command, such as "Molly Go" or "Molly Come". Currently, interaction and communication with Molly are available only in English, Bengali and Hindi. As of August 1st, 2020, Leo’s Mate has just 1 employee working on Molly. In August 2019, Leo’s Mate devices team announced that they had sold over 2 Molly-enabled devices. The new Molly Studio became the first smart speaker with 360 sound and Dolby sound. Other new devices included an Molly Echo dot with a “POLLY” behind the fabric, a new third-generation Leo’s Mate Echo, Molly Show 8, a plug-in Molly device, Molly Flex, Molly built-in wireless earphones, Molly buds, Molly built-in spectacles, Molly frames, an Molly built-in Ring, and Molly Loop.

August 1st officially declared as “MollyDay” for all.

- Executed by Niranjana Nair

An adventures jump - A tale by Simran Sanghavi

Today in Chennai, Alwarpet there was a sweet disaster. Two 20 year olds, Smoll and Sim Sim decided to hold hands and jump into a deadly pile of sponges inspite of knowing that they might never get out. Smoll was the one to persuade Sim Sim to do this with her. They struggled, but finally together they got out and took a selfie just as they knew they'd survived. They live happily ever after.

The president of squadsville has declared August 1st to be observed as Mollyday by the entire nation, hereafter. Here are the guidelines you should know: • The city will be cleaned and made spick and span for Mollyday. • All libraries and museums will be open for 24 hours. • All footpaths will be lined with flowers and shrubs. • Grammar police will be taking rounds around the city. • Dress code for the day is chic and cute, anyone wearing anything else will be banned. • Disney will be showcasing their magical parade at 8:00 PM on Lahiry road. • Fireworks will be unfortunately banned, keeping the earth in mind. • Pollyland will be serving FREE CANDY! • Everyone will receive free postcard.

After a few drinks at a fellow designer's birthday, Miss Molly drops some serious shade at the plebeian arrangement of the party. Her Royal Highness can be seen enjoying a drink of Rum Cola but she's all about serving the Tea, if you know what I mean.

- By Saurabh Kodan


-by Srabana Ghosh

The 6C Girls: exclusive scoop - By Simran Sanghavi

Six girls from(starting from the left standing) Cutesville, Badasster, Momslore, Fairyland (sitting from the left) Theplatown and Listsforlife city have made impossible, possible. They graduated NIFT and survived! When asked they say that their source of motivation, rejuvenation, strength and much needed reminder of fun was 6C. They organised the most memorable parties, had home decor like no other college student and we're undoubtedly found at Watson's, T nagar ever Wednesday evening. Not only did they survive NIFT but have also managed to miss it after. They wish they could go back in time and stop it there somehow. We can all take inspiration from this lot and learn how to be fun nerds at their best. They wanted us to finish the article by saying, "until next time"

“I would drink every day, on my own, until I passed out” :Mallika Lahiry She is one of the best players on the planet; which she can prove at the World Cup starting in Gurgaon on Saturday; but her real challenge came off the pitch Friday 31st July 2020 00:00 Lionel Messi, Diego Maradona, Pele, Zinedine Zidane and Mallika Lahiry are all marvellous footballers who have brought distinction to the No 5 shirt, but Lahiry rolls her eyes at the comparison, not because she feels unworthy in such exalted company, for after all she has scored 2 times in 100 games for 6C, in an amazing

career extending back to 1997, but because it uses Karan’s football to define the women's game, which is the bane of just about every interview Molly does. We meet at a hotel just outside Arjun Marg, where she and the rest of the 6C team are holed up before setting off for the World Cup in Gurgaon, which begins on Sunday. We'll come to the tournament, and 6C’s chances, but let me first raise another topic that might be expected to make her bridle even more than comparisons with the Karan: does she consider herself an alcoholic? "I don't know, it's a hard one," she says

The Karan Jacob Interview

equably enough, through the jet lag. Molly has just flown in from the Chennai, where she plies her trade as a striker of rare potency for the NIFT AD’s. She smiles, which I take as a willingness to answer more questions. Having not admitted to her drinking problems for several years after she resolved them, with rehabilitation at the Sporting Chance addiction clinic set up by Anushma Patwal (once of Noida, Gurgaon and the vodka-induced stupor, just like her), she is now prepared to discuss them with engaging, almost disconcerting, candour. Will she redeem herself!?


Memewhile

By Maryann Oliver

Characters and events depicted in these memes are not entirely fictitious. Any similarity to actual events or persons, living or dead, is purely intentional.

What to watch By Anushma Patwal

• Shows : The haunting of Hill House, You, Trinkets, Friends from College,Mind Hunter, Living with yourself, Maniac, Dark, Lucifer, Hollywood.

• Movies : Zodiac, Murder Mystery, Drive, Game Night, Gangster Squad, Article 15, Badla, When we first met, Grease, Let it Snow,6 underground, Into the Wild, A Place beyond the pine, The Italian Job, Love per square foot, Bareilly ki Barfi, Someone great, Crazy Stupid Love, The break-up, Spenser Confidential.

• Shows : Paatallok, The Office, Upload, Fleabag, Mr. Robot, Modern Love, The Mentalist, Joey. •Movies : Love and other Drugs, Rock on, Shutter Island, Gravity, Contagion, Wazir, Olympus has fallen, The bank job, Raazi, Birds of Prey, The Terminal, Crazy rich Asians.


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