They are English Bulldogs Karen Sturtevant

Karen Sturtevant

Acolleague recently acquired an English bulldog puppy. I immediately like him (the colleague, that is)–the pup was a given. I begged my way into meeting the little duffer. As I awaited the day, the subject of these interesting canines had me thinking about the allure of English bulldogs.

They are slow walking, swaying medical nightmares. They drool. Their food (free of corn, wheat, and soy) often has to be special ordered, their prescriptions compounded. An innocent sneeze on Tuesday could be life-threatening pneumonia by Thursday. You have the vet on speed dial, and the staff knows you by voice. They are stubborn. They know what they want, when they want. Drinking water becomes a five- star alarm with dish cloths at the ready. They start the day at 4 a.m. by barking and getting fed only to have the dawn made sweeter by the early morning nap taken after said feeding. You cannot go back to bed. They do–often.

They need daily cleanings between their skin folds with nontoxic anti- fungal wipes as they are prone to yeast infections. Their noses need coconut oil to keep moisturized, their nails trimmed weekly and medicated baths given several times a month to stave off infection, allergy and bacterial growth. They are not in a hurry and heaven help you if you are. They slobber. They burp and pass gas. Inflamed hot spots typically develop due to excess itching or licking. Would you know how to treat them? Ear and eye infections, too, are common. Preventative care will save both pain and trips to the vet’s office. Pet insurance is highly recommended. The unique, stocky, tough-dog physique is both attraction to and deterrent from ownership. Overfeeding mouths lead to overweight bodies putting unnecessary pressure on already-sensitive joints. They are English bulldogs.

They’ve (or have they?) come a long way from the days of the 18th century when they were used for the blood sport of bull baiting, pinning the massive beast to the ground. Once longer, taller with actual almost-muzzles, the dog would freely breathe, walk without pain and lead an almost canine carefree existence. We humans, in our ultimate know-it-all superior wisdom fond of achieving God-like aesthetics, decided we wanted a shorter, stouter, more compact dog. While we’re at it, let’s move the nose and mouth back so it’s nearly impossible for breath to enter and cool before entering their bodies, making them extremely heart intolerant. By shrinking their naris (nostrils) to pin tips in the indelible goal of making a dog, not a dog, we did it. Meet the English bulldog.

Unlike any other dog breed, the wrinkly, smushy-faced English bulldog has more challenges than your typical canine companion. Why spend an extra hour before the sun rises to feed, clean and prepare them for the day? Why spend holidays and weekends at the vet’s office? We English bulldog owners are certifiably insane; we like being broke and are a little off kilter. In our world, English bulldogs reign. The rule our roost. They have stolen our bank accounts and hearts simultaneously. We barely notice because we’re blinded by love with this pure-in-heart dog.

It takes a grounded person to claim successful bulldog ownership. Have I mentioned

budgeting for a special diet of canned and dry food diet for life? Wake up to find your bulldog’s right eye squinty and runny? Off to the optometrist with a fist full of money at the ready just for the privilege of walking in a 24-hour emergency clinic. What about surgery to correct cherry eye, dry eye, corneal ulcers or entropion? Then off to the compounding pharmacy for 14 days of medication. Come home to find an entire bag of doggie vitamins ingested by a very guilty- looking face? Off to the emergency vet for two days in the pure oxygen tank. Get out the credit card and cancel that tropical vacation.

For prospective English bulldog parents, do your homework, and then do more. Find a veterinarian experienced in English bulldog care. They truly are stubborn canine aliens. Talk to current and previous owners. Be realistic. This is life altering. Even the most judicious of owners can miss cries for help, for signs of pain and illness. Bulldogs are stoic creatures. Procuring any puppy or dog ‘because it’s so cute,’ is never a reason. Consider adopting to give a bulldog a second or third chance. According to www.pibblesandbits. com, the English bulldog has long been a popular breed of dog ranking fifth overall according to the AKC. How many of these dogs end up surrendered or dumped due to uneducated owners?

I spent a great deal of time at a local

Lord Basil dining at The Meltdown in Barre

rescue specializing in English bulldogs. The ailments, pain, extreme neglect and downright brutality these dogs, as several others faced, would make you question the state of humanity. The dogs that entered the rescue were given gold credit cards and no time limit for restorative health. These were the fortunate. So many are not.

I lost my rescued Penney a few years ago. I miss her deep snoring, her attempt to ‘play,’ and every particular trait that made her the special princess she was. Three years was not enough with her. When the time is right, I will honor her with another bulldog. Once bulldog fever takes hold of your heart, it’s impossible to let go.

brings me his favorite, the stuffed hedgehog. We play fetch and tug-of-war, and with that I’m instantly accepted into his circle. I couldn’t be happier. Aesthetically, he is a stunner. His underbite, the floppy ears, the perfect little paws. Although Rizzo’s a beauty, Will and Kennedy are cognizant of the health challenges that come with the pretty face. We talked about cherry eye (already experienced by Rizzo), yeast infections, breathing challenges, hot weather woes, hip and joint issues, overfeeding, a sensitive tummy. As much as I gushed about Rizzo, I was equally impressed with this young couple’s dedication to educating and preparing for raising of an out- of-this-world breed.

Rizzo is learning how to be a well-mannered boy having already mastered ‘sit’ and ‘shake.’ Obedience class is in his future. Socializing remains key. “We tried bringing him to downtown Burlington. He can’t walk five feet without going crazy tying to meet people,” said Will. “He has to say hi to everyone he sees, whether it’s people or another dog, he has to go up to them,” comments Kennedy.

“He makes the funniest noises, like a little gremlin,” Kennedy tells me. I heard this as I was rubbing Rizzo’s smooth tummy. Something between an extraterritorial and gleeful toddler. Nighttime is never dull: “I never knew a dog would keep me up with his snoring. He’s so loud!” Will says good heartily.

For others thinking about bringing an English bulldog into their family Kennedy advises, “Do your research. This specific breed requires a lot of special attention.” So far, the efforts have been paying off. “Once you bond with them, it’s so worth it,” Will adds.

On this frigid winter day, my heart was warmed by witnessing the on-going commitment to this spunky pup. It’s clear Will and Kennedy have made the cut for bulldog ownership. Rizzo’s in very good hands.

For all the complexities associated with the bully breeds, they hold a special place in our psyche, our souls. Stocky, silly, sweet. Sensitive stalwart, English bulldogs are like no other. They’re not for everyone and everyone’s not for them. If you like challenges, have a need to grow your empathy threshold and spend your last paycheck dollar, you still may not be right for an English bulldog. Few are. If, however, you fancy yourself a vivacious caregiver, observant steward, have a willingness to learn and re-learn perhaps you have what it takes to offer a lifeline for these gallant little gems.

I was to meet my coworker’s charge, Rizzo. As the door opened, I was greeted by a marshmallow accented with brown. His paws reaching up—a two-legs-off-thefloor greeting. Will and Kennedy, Rizzo’s pet parents, told me they were working on his jumping. Not to worry I told them. I was in bulldog heaven.

If my Penney was a princess, surely Rizzo is a prince—a rowdy one. They are eerily similar, even down to the speckled ear, the spot on the back. Unlike Penney (a rescue with a dark past), Rizzo is blessed to have his own people from day one who, unabashedly, dote on him.

He’s a whirl of energy as he zooms from person to person, soaking in their attention. “He goes from zero to a hundred real quick,” said Will. At six-months, Rizzo is learning that toys are for chewing, snow is fun for bulldozing through and Golden Retrievers make excellent tumble buddies. Will mentioned he’s glad the baby teeth are gone as during teething, Rizzo would gnaw on Will’s feet. “They were all chewed up,” Will said laughing.

Rizzo’s personality beams though his bright eyes. Trotting to his toy pile, he Spring 2022 www.4LegsAndATail.com 9