Day of Timeless Tomlin Transgender Remembrance in Iowa
Gloria Reaches Out to the Gays
One of America’s greatest commediennes brings her talents Proclamation by Iowa Governor Culver Whereas, the state of Iowa has a long-standing by Chris to Hoyt Sherman Place Nov. 18 tradition of upholding the dignity of the individual,
Azzopardi
supporting legal equality and fair treatment for all citizens, and ensuring that acts of neglect and violence towards any segment of the population will not be tolerated; and Whereas, transgender people, who often are undeservedly maligned and misunderstood, contribute greatly to our state’s rich diversity and prosperity; and Whereas, transgender day of remembrance honors those who have died by homicide, or suicide, by the hand of ignorance and prejudice, while attempting to pursue the American dream and equality; and Now, therefore, I, Chester J. Culver, Governor of the State of Iowa, do hereby proclaim the day of November 20th, as Transgender Day of Remembrance in Iowa, and I urge all citizens to join me in this special observance and to work towards eliminating discrimination on all levels and to promote tolerance.
In this exclusive chat, the Queen of Latin Pop talks conservative upbringing, gay marriage and controversial Target deal.
What’s Inside: Section 1: News & Politics
Advertising rates From the Editors Roll Out the UNwelcome Mat by Jonathan Wilson 2011 World AIDS Day: Education Leads to Compassion International Transgender Day of Remembrance The New Des Moines Pride Center Ally of the Month : Robert W. Curoe, 1925-2011 Mr Midwest Leather 2011 Remarkables by Jonathan Wilson Creep of the Week Minor Details by Robert Minor “Space Exploration” by Tony E. Hansen
Hotel Blackhawk:
Lily Tomlin can, without hyperbole, be called one of America’s most accomplished comediennes. She has performed on stage, television, and film--in both comic and dramatic roles--and has released four comedy albums. Probably her best-known film role was playing Violet in Nine to Five, alongside Dolly Parton and Jane Fonda. But with all of the characters she has played in a career that stretches back to the 1960, it is notable how some of the very first characters she created have stood the test of time. The irrascible “Ernestine” is probably the best example of this timeless aspect of her characters. Ernestine started on the TV show “Laugh In” as a fictitious operator for the telephone company, back when there was just a single telephone company. The character aptly summed up, in a comic way, all of the frustrating experiences people might have interacting with large, impersonal businesses--an experience that seems to have only become more frustrating more than four decades later. Fortunately for her fans, the character has been one of many who continue to be part of Tomlin’s repertoire even today. Lily Tomlin will be performing live at Hoyt Sherman Place in Des Moine on November 18, and her numerous
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Davenport’s restored landmark is hip, historic—and very welcoming
Section 2: Fun Guide
Anyone planning a wedding trip to Iowa—or just a stay along the Mississippi River—will find no place more welcoming and luxurious than Davenport’s Hotel Blackhawk (HotelBlackhawk.com). This 11-storey hotel has 130 guest rooms (four of which are official “ADA accessible” rooms) and is located conveniently The newly built, contemporary in the heart of Davenand stylish east entrance to the port, Iowa, one of four Hotel Blackhawk. cities that make up the metropolitan area known as the “Quad Cities” spanning the Mississippi in Iowa and Illinois.
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Entertainment Picks for December Gloria Reaches Out to the Gays By Chris Azzopardi The Outfield Deep Inside Hollywood Cocktail Chatter Recurring Events, Statewide Hear Me Out (Music Reviews) Wired That Way by Rachel Eliason The Gay Wedding Planner “LA CAGE AUX FOLLES” Review by Beau Fodor Out of Town:Winter Adventures Book Worm Sez: The Choosing Comics and Crossword Puzzle
Section 3: Community
3 3 4 5 5 6 6 6 7 8 9 9 11 11 13 13 14 15 15 17 18 24 25 26 26
Greater Omaha GLBT Network 29 ONEIowa Public Forums 29 First Friday Breakfast Club: Dr. Rebecca C. Gruber 29 Bisschopswijn Recipes 30 Inside Out: “Train Wreck” by Ellen Krug 31 Twenty Questions, a 10-part transgender series 32 “Gaycation Packing” by Robert Hoffmann 34 Business Directory 35-36 UI TransCollaborations Presents TransWeek! 2011 37 Ask Lambda Legal: Back to School by Ivan Espinoza-Madrigal 37 “Flying while gay” by Rev. Irene Monroe 38 “Go, Chaz! (Gays on Reality TV)” by Robert Hofmann 38
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ACCESSline Page 2
Section 1: News & Politics
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 1: News & Politics
NOVEMBER 2011
From the Editors
PUBLICATION INFORMATION Copyright © 2011, All rights reserved. ACCESSline P.O. Box 2666 Cedar Rapids, IA 52406-2666 (319) 550-0957 www.ACCESSlineIOWA.com editor@ACCESSlineIOWA.com
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Editor Arthur Breur
Dinner Table Rudeness As Thanksgiving approaches, I’m getting very tired of presidential candidates talking about good, patriotic Americans—such as me and every other LGBT person in the country—as if we are not right there at the dinner table. Or right there in the room. Or right there, listening to them debate. Or right there, reading their various rude and insensitive statements about us. Now, I’m not personally going to call all anti-LGBT statements by politicians “hateful” in every case, but they are hurtful. First of all, I don’t qualify most statements of a politician’s as having enough real emotional motivation behind them to make them truly hateful. Oh, there are the obvious exceptions of Rick Santorum and Michelle Bachmann. I definitely feel that their level of anti-LGBT ranting and ignorance deserves to be tagged as nothing less than hateful. Santorum, in fact, has made a nasty name for himself (pun intended) because of his continued animosity and downright damaging statements toward our community. Also, there are times when well-meaning people just put their foot in their mouths by
parroting stuff they’ve heard and don’t realize apply to real people—real people potentially right there at the Thanksgiving table. I know such non-hate-motivated dinner-table bashing has happened to many people in our community, myself included. After all, until we become the ones to be “out” to our families and friends, they often do not realize that the things they say are even hurtful, much less hateful. So I don’t always call the messages that come out of the mouths of politicians “hateful” per se. No, most political anti-LGBT comments are merely manipulative. The words they speak are not prompted by hate, but by a desire for power or prestige—power or prestige that would come from the position they seek. This month of this year, the position being sought has about as much power and prestige as a person can imagine, so they will make every calculated comment they can to get them nominated as their party’s candidate then elected as this country’s president. Of course, this argument works in both directions. I don’t attribute any real love from Barack Obama when he gave us promises about how he would treat us during his campaign in 2008. It is true that he has overseen more progress for LGBT rights during his first term than any other president in history. However, he has been very reticent himself to make overt or aggressive decisions in our favor, and we find ourselves still waiting for him to “evolve” his thinking on some of our very basic civil rights. Perhaps President Obama is acting in a way that is motivated by political “smarts”— doing things in such a way that they are less easily attacked than if they were executive orders placed by one of our most politically embattled presidents. On the other hand, his political “smarts” could just be meant as a cover to keep himself from being held directly responsible should any of the efforts—such as the ongoing ENDA fight—fail. After all, if you
ACCESSline Page 3 have no direct involvement, you have no direct fault or failure. But as any politician knows (and Iowa’s own Steve King does this every day), you can always get away with taking credit for something that benefits your constituents, even if you had absolutely nothing to do with it! (Or in Steve King’s case, even if you voted against it: bit.ly/txM2MR) But every single leading republican candidate is talking like the oblivious relative at the dinner table, spouting anti-LGBT talking points without consideration for the friends and loved ones sitting right there with them. It gets old, especially for those of us who have worked so hard with our own families to get the message across: “We’re right here! Please stop saying things about us that you know are just not true!”
Queerest Halloween Contest
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ACCESSline Page 4
Section 1: News & Politics
NOVEMBER 2011
Roll Out the UNwelcome Mat by Jonathan Wilson Bigotry and discrimination know no boundaries of color. That is to say, perpetrators come in all colors. This is just a preliminary report, but a report nonetheless, on the effort thus far to join and support the Des Moines branch of the NAACP. I’ve been an NAACP member at the national level—card carrying—for more than a quarter of a century. I fervently support the NAACP mission “to ensure the political, educational, social, and economic equality of rights of all persons and to eliminate race-based discrimination.” (Emphasis added.) I’d not been involved with the local branch largely because of the high-profile, vitriolic, anti-gay rhetoric of “Rev.” Ratliff who serves on its executive committee. I decided that his views, which he makes no attempt to separate from his role with the NAACP—needed some remedial education. Bigotry of every stripe is just prideful ignorance, so education attacks bigotry at its core. So, I let it be known that I planned to join the local chapter of the NAACP and, bless them every one, several friends decided to join with me. I report the following sequence of events and “coincidences.” Several gay white guys attending our first meeting at 5:30 on July 26. For a long time, the local chapter had held its monthly membership meetings starting at 5:30. Uninvited, Register columnist Rekha Basu also attended that meeting “as an observer.” As it happened, much of the senior leadership was absent, attending the national NAACP convention. Those present seemed to welcome
us and accepted our payment of $30 each to cover membership dues. The welcome, however, was equally consistent with genuine welcome and with simply being “Iowa nice.” Time would tell. Several of us attended a second monthly meeting at 5:30 on August 23. Additional leadership was back, including “Rev.” Ratliff, and it was announced: (1) for future reference, the Bylaws prohibit members of the media, as such, attending membership meetings; (2) in the future, there’d be a monthly meeting of the Executive Committee at 5:30, followed by a meeting of members starting at 7:00; and (3) per a sermonette by “Rev.” Ratliff, the NAACP has a very broad mission, but it has historically focused on racial discrimination, we are not yet where we need to be in eliminating racial discrimination, and the NAACP should continue its historic focus on race until we are where we need to be on that issue. He didn’t mention any names. He didn’t mention gay civil rights. He didn’t mention Bayard Rustin, an “out” gay man who was responsible for organizing the 1963 March on Washington that gave Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. a platform that launched him into the highest pantheon of American champions of equality. (see The Washington Post article by Steve Hendrix on August 21, 2011) The next day I sent an email to the NAACP branch president, a black man who works at Grinnell College (whose president is an “out” gay man and also black) asking for a meeting and for a copy of the Bylaws. The email didn’t bounce back as undeliverable. There was no response. After a few days of no response, I placed
a call to another member of the Executive Committee who is a faculty member at Drake University. I left a message; the call was not returned. On September 27, several of the newest members—all white and all gay or gay-supportive—went to the meeting place at 5:30, only to learn that members are not permitted to attend Executive Committee meetings even as observers. There was no suggestion that its agenda was particularly confidential for some reason. We returned for the open membership meeting at 7:00. Conspicuously, no members other than white ones joined the meeting at that time. During the meeting, I reiterated my request for a copy of the Bylaws. The president announced that the Bylaws are only shared with members after they’ve attended a “training session.” He’d have left it at that, but I asked when there would be another “training session.” He volunteered that the last one had been conducted by “Rev.” Ratliff in June. I asked, incredulously, whether that meant that as a paid member I couldn’t have access to the rules by which we operate—and to which all should be accountable—until June of next year! He said he’d look into whether a suitable “training session” could be arranged sometime sooner. No commitment on that. I requested an accurate email address of the president and he gave me one different from the one I’d used previously. The next day, I sent him, again, a request for a meeting, one-on-one. I offered to buy his lunch in Des Moines, or said I’d come to Grinnell if he’d prefer
Sun., January 22, 2012, 2:30 p.m. West High School, Iowa City February 2012 Bruckner 5 Fri., February 10, 2012, 7:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Sat., February 11, 2012, 7:30 p.m. West High School, Iowa City March 2012 St. John Passion Sat., March 24, 2012, 7:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Sun., March 25, 2012, 2:30 p.m.
West High School, Iowa City May 2012 A Slavic Celebration Sat., May 12, 2012, 7:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Sun., May 13, 2012, 2:30 p.m. West High School, Iowa City
Orchestra Iowa Schedule Classical Series
December A Baroque Christmas Sat., December 3, 2011, 7:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Sun., December 4, 2011, 2:30 p.m. Coralville Performing Arts Center, Coralville January 2012 Fire and Ice Sat., January 21, 2012, 7:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids
Popular Series
Simply Sinatra Sat., November 19, 2011, 7:30 p.m. Sun., November 20, 2011, 2:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Radio Holly Days with Five By Design Sat., December 17, 2011, 7:30 p.m. Sun., December 18, 2011, 2:30 p.m. Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids Good Vibrations: Music of the Beach Boys Sat., May 26, 2012, 4:00pm Veterans Memorial Stadium
Chamber Series
Beethoven, Daugherty & Mozart Saturday, November 12, 2011, 6 & 8:30pm. Bach, Haydn & Brahms Saturday, February 11, 2012, 6 & 8:30pm. Bax, Ibert, Griffes & Dvořák Saturday, April 14, 2012, 6 & 8:30pm.
that. No response. That same day I phoned the national NAACP to request a copy of the Bylaws (they are promulgated by the national organization and uniform throughout all branches), and to check on the legitimacy of required “training.” The person I spoke to in the legal department was unaware of any “training” requirement and referred me to Kevin Miles, the regional NAACP Director. I placed a call to him on September 28; as of this writing the call has not been returned. I think the NAACP can use all the friends it can get. In my estimation, that may be one of the short-comings at least of the local branch—not reaching out to natural allies. It seems strange to exclude all members from even observing a meeting of the Executive Committee. It seems strange to have “training” before a new member is allowed access to the Bylaws. It seems strange that emails and calls are not returned. It seems strange to be denied even a meeting with the president of the branch. Strange, but maybe there’s an innocent explanation. It’s understandable enough that folks might be suspicious of our motives, but stifling communication is no way to uncover motives, and throwing up incomprehensible, inexplicable hurdles to full participation harkens disquietingly back to poll taxes and reading tests as a precondition to voting—a shameful chapter in American history. Sadly, hypocrisy knows no boundaries of color either. I feel a stirring; I think it may be Martin Luther King Jr. getting ready to roll over in his grave.
“As conservatives we believe in the sanctity of life. We believe in the sanctity of traditional marriage, and I applaud those legislators in New Hampshire who are working to defend marriage as an institution between one man and one woman, realizing that children need to be raised in a loving home by a mother and a father.” — Texas Governor and Republican presidential hopeful Rick Perry in a New Hampshire speech on October 28, 2010, apparently oblivious to all the loving “nontraditional” families he just insulted.
ACCESSline Page 5 Section 1: News & Politics Iowa City Events for World Aids Day 2011 World AIDS Day: NOVEMBER 2011
Education Leads to Compassion In 1988, the World Health Organizations, (WHO) declared December 1 st as World AIDS Day, in order to promote social tolerance and a greater awareness of Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) and Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS). Northeast Iowa agencies and organizations are collaborating to host an event on December 1, 2011 to bring awareness about the agencies and services available. Our program, “Education Leads to Compassion” educates the public about the struggles Iowans living with HIV/ AIDS experience in their daily lives. Through education and awareness, we hope to foster understanding and reduce HIV-related stigma. Stigma and discrimination have been major obstacles to effective prevention and care since the beginning of the HIV/AIDS epidemic over 30 years ago. When present, stigma creates an environment where people may avoid HIV/AIDS related services such as testing and disclosure and delay entering critical medical care. The W.H.O. cites fear of stigma and discrimination as the main reason why people are reluctant to be tested, to disclose HIV status or to take antiretroviral medications. In addition, other social prejudices based on race, ethnicity, gender, sex, immigration status, sexual orientation, and misconceptions of drug use and addiction compound HIV/AIDS stigma. The stigma extends beyond individuals living with HIV/AIDS to family members, volunteers, caregivers, coworkers and professionals who provide HIV/AIDS services or advocacy. The event will take place at Crossroads Center, 2060 Crossroads Blvd, Waterloo, IA from 5 to 7 pm in the hallway by Dillards. The evening will include a variety of activities to bring the community together. T-shirts will be handed out to
participants. Participants will be asked to fill out signs stating; "HIV won’t stop me…" Can You Tell Who’s Positive: To break through stigma, discrimination, and stereotypes, this activity will allow participants to see if they can tell who is positive or negative based solely on an image. Participants can sign up for gift cards, gift baskets, and other prizes to be awarded throughout the event. At 6 pm we will have a Positive Presentation for all participants. We are still looking for sponsors for the event or gift baskets and items for door prizes, if you are interested in helping please contact Tami Haught at tamih@pitchiowa.org. Or send donation to PITCH, P.O. Box 518, Des Moines, IA 50302. Positive Iowans Taking Charge (PITCH) is a statewide non-profit organization with a clear mission: To create an atmosphere where HIV+ people can unite, advocate, and assist other HIV+ people for better health and wellness. PITCH strives to be a source of encouragement, provide educational opportunities, camaraderie, and a sense of community to all Iowans living with HIV/AIDS. You can find PITCH on facebook or pitchiowa.org.
International Transgender Day of Remembrance Transgender Day of Remembrance is held nationally in November to honor Rita Hester, whose murder in 1998 launched the “Remembering Our Dead” Web project and a San Francisco candlelight vigil the following year. During the last decade, one person per month has died because of transgender-based hate or prejudice, according to Brett Genny Beemyn, author of the forthcoming book, “The Lives of Transgender People.” Founded by activist and artist Gwendolyn Ann Smith after Hester’s death, Transgender Day of Remembrance has grown to encompass memorials in over 120 cities worldwide.
Free Rapid HIV Testing
ICARE (Iowa Center for AIDS Resources and Education) and Johnson County Public Health will be providing free HIV testing to the community on Tuesday, Dec. 1- World AIDS Day. Regular HIV testing (results in 5-7 days) and rapid HIV testing (results in 20 minutes) will be available to the community from 10 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. at the Iowa City Public Library. Registration is not required. The test consists of a quick, finger prick. Counselors will be available to talk about HIV/AIDS prevention, concerns you may have, and where to get treatment or attend support groups. In addition, a panel discussion entitled: “HIV in Iowa Today,” will take place on Dec. 1 from 7-9 p.m. at hotelVetro (Plaza Towers, second floor, 201 South Linn Street, Iowa City). The event is organized by Johnson County Public Health, ICARE and SNPHA - a UI student pharmacy group, to raise awareness around HIV/AIDS by engaging participants in a community conversation. It is hosted by Connections. According to the Iowa Department of Public Health in December 2008, there were 2,045 people living with HIV/AIDS in Iowa, with 108 new cases being diagnosed that year. As more and more people get tested and start to ask questions, they are learning HIV is no longer an automatic death sentence. HIV/AIDS is preventable. Kurt Pierick, ICARE Program Coordi-
nator says, “By offering rapid testing, we have the opportunity to provide counseling, test results and medical referrals within a very short period of time. This should help reduce the anxiety often associated with getting an HIV test.” If you are interested in getting tested but are unable to attend the World AIDS Day event on Dec. 1, please contact ICARE at 319-338-2135 for a list of community organizations offering HIV testing. Tuesday, Dec. 1, 10:00 am - 3:30 pm Iowa City Public Library, 123 S. Linn St., Iowa City
Connections Forum : HIV in Iowa Today A panel discussion entitled: “HIV in Iowa Today” is organized by Johnson County Public Health, ICARE and SNPHA - a UI student pharmacy group, to raise awareness around HIV/AIDS by engaging participants in a community conversation. Know your history. Don’t let it repeat itself! Tuesday, Dec. 1 7 - 9 p.m. Hotel Vetro Plaza Towers, second floor, 201 South Linn Street, Iowa City
Free Safer Sex Kits Thursday, Dec. 3rd, 9 - 10 a.m. MECCA will distribute Safer Sex kits at the pedestrian mall in Iowa City in recognition of World AIDS Day.
Section 1: News & Politics The New Des Moines Pride Center Ally of the Month: ACCESSline Page 6
As of October 7th, 2011, The Des Moines Pride Center officially became a non-profit LGBT Community Resource Center. On September 9th, 2011 a meeting was had with Sandy Vopalka, the founder of Equality Iowa, was had on the future of “The CENTER”. It became clear that there was, indeed, no future to be had, unless things changed, and changed fast. Volunteer Amber Miller and her husband, who is female-to-male transgender, and Volpalka agreed it was time for Equality Iowa and its project The CENTER to move on. In less than one month, 1300 Locust Street formed a new emergency Board of Directors, incorporating, and having the first “soft opening” on October 11th—National Coming Out Day. Over 50 people were in attendance. If there was any doubt before, on that day there was none. It was shown that Iowa needs and wants a LGBT Community Resource Center. The past month has been spent in cleaning out offices and rooms at the Pride Center. With the help of volunteers, Beau
Fodor of Gay Weddings with Panache, and the new board of directors, the Pride Center is on its way to becoming a true safe space for the LGBT Community and allies. The Des Moines Pride Center is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization that offers: LGBT Lending Library Media Center Free wifi Meeting space Support Groups The Des Moines Pride Center’s Mission: “Des Moines Pride Center will provide a safe place for the LGBT community to gather, gain education, improve health, and gain support advocacy in a drug-free environment.” The Des Moines Pride Center is working hard on building bridges with Iowa’s LGBT community at large, reaching out to organizations and individuals alike. And encourages all to come down to the Pride Center and become a member. Visit the Pride Center’s webpage at dsmpridecenter.org to see Articles of Incorporation, By-laws, meet our Board of Directors, volunteers, and Amber Miller, the interim Executive Director. There will be elections for the calendar year 2012 this coming November.
Mr Midwest Leather 2011
Mike Prater of Evansville, Indiana, was selected Mr Midwest Leather 2011 at Bad Dog Bar & Grill in St. Louis, Missouri, by a prestigious panel of judges. Aaron Laxton was first runner-up and Rick Hulvey second runner-up. The contest was held September 30 and October 1. Organizers estimated over 300 in attendance, many from across the Midwest Pictured above, Mr Midwest Leather 2011 Mike Prater, Aaron region. Laxton first runner-up, and Rick Hulvey second runner-up. Judges cited Prater’s experience, knowledge of leather and his extensive fundrais- Leather MC) and “Mama” Sandy Reinhardt ing work in choosing him this year’s Mr of San Francisco, who welcomed several Midwest Leather. Along with the title he new members into “Mama’s Family.” received $500 cash prize, title sash, vest, During the event Saturday night medallion and sponsorship to compete at Philip Hitchock, Mr Midwest Leather International Mr Leather in 2012. First 2010, gave his step-down speech thankand second runners-up received $100 ing everyone for their support during his in cash. title year. Chester Munro, from the Leather Mike Prater has been involved with Archives & Museum in Chicago, was on community groups in Kentucky, Missouri hand to accept the original Mr Midwest and Indiana, and helped to raise money for Leather sash to be added to the Leather such causes as the Owensboro, Kentucky Archives collection. He was then called AIDS Task Force, St. Louis Effort for AIDS, back to the stage to accept the Honorary PFLAG, Lexington (KY) Fairness, the Mr Midwest Leather award for his commuHumane Society, and the Children’s Ward nity service. at U.K. Hospital. He has also hosted two The contest featured entertainment Claw Nation parties. during intermission. A demonstration The panel of judges at the contest of fire flogging was described by one included Terry Laupp (Mr. Missouri Leather onlooker as “Incredible. You always hear 2010), Mike Pagano (Mr. Iowa Leather about it, but to actually see it happen is 2011), Philip Hitchcock (Mr. Midwest something else.” This was followed by a Leather 2010), and two of the best-loved pole dancer, who was brought to the stage women in the leather community: Karen tied to a pole then set loose to perform his Crecelius (former International Mr. aerial acrobatics.
NOVEMBER 2011
Robert W. Curoe, 1925-2011 Curoe, BVM. Also Mona Hanley, dear friend of 4 years. He was preceded in death by his wife Joyce, his parents, two brothers John and Richard, and two sisters Katherine (Curoe) Pfab and Sr. Mary Curoe, BVM. In lieu of flowers, Robert has requested memorials be given to Human Rights Campaign (HRC) c/o Reiff Funeral Home, PO Box 430 Cascade, Iowa 52033. Online condolences may be left for the family at www.reiffuneralhomeinc.com. Robert W. Curoe, 85, formerly of Bernard, Iowa died Wednesday October 26, 2011 at his home in Dubuque, Iowa. Services were held at 10:00am, Monday, October 31, 2011 at Sacred Heart Catholic Church, Fillmore with Rev. Douglas Loecke officiating. Concelebrants included Rev. Bob McAleer and Rev. Neil Manternach. Assisting Deacon was be Marvin Recker. Burial followed in the church cemetery with full military honors afforded by Cascade American Legion, Post 528. Friends called from 3:00 to 8:00pm on Sunday, October 30, 2011 at Reiff Funeral Home, Cascade, Iowa where a prayer service was held at 4:00pm. He was born on October 28, 1925 in Bernard, Iowa, son of William and Marie (Powers) Curoe. He received his education at Loras Academy. He was united in marriage to Joyce (McAleer) on November 27, 1954 in Monticello, Iowa. Robert served in the Army 1950-1951. He spent 14 years as a ski instructor at Sundown, was active in PFLAG and the Human Rights Campaign, was inducted into the Dubuque County Cattleman’s Hall of Fame, was Director of Dubuque County Pork Producers and was a farmer and cattle feeder for many years.
Bob Curoe with his daughter Carol, 1982. Photo: St. Joan of Arc Church, Minneapolis, MN
Surviving are six children, Michael (Estie) Curoe of St. Louis, MO, Joann (Devin) Stephens of St. Onge, SD, Kevin (Darlene) of Bernard, Carol (Susan) of Minneapolis, MN, Patty (Steve) Telgener of Golden, CO and Tim (Kristi) of Chaska, MN; 14 grandchildren; one great-grandchild and one sibling, Sr. Janita
Are There Closets in Heaven? A Catholic Father and Lesbian Daughter Share their Story by Carol Curoe and Robert Curoe (Published 2007)
( Available for purchase at Amazon at: http://amzn.to/ruOTDb ) It s always difficult for a child to tell her parents she is gay, regardless of how liberal or conservative her family might be. When the daughter is part of a devout Catholic family living in a small rural community, the parent-child relationship is exposed to even greater risk, often beyond repair. Are There Closets in Heaven? is a revealing firstperson dialogue between a lesbian daughter, who had always dutifully tried to please her parents, and her Catholic father, an eightyone-year-old farmer from Iowa. Through their letters and reflections, we see how courage and love made it possible for Bob and Carol Curoe to navigate the twists and turns of such a dramatic shift in their lives. This highly personal and often emotional exchange offers a gift of hope and inspiration to families who struggle with learning their child is not what they expected. Are There Closets in Heaven? lets us experience the real lives behind debates taking place in today s media on same-sex marriage, constitutional amendments, gays and lesbians raising children, and religion.
“Mom and dad, I’m gay. I always have been and I always will be. I am in a very committed relationship with Susan and have been for over three years. I love her very much and am very happy.” — Excerpt from Carol Curoe’s “coming out” letter to her parents as told in the book “Are There Closets in Heaven” by Carol Curoe and Bob Curoe.
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 1: News & Politics
ACCESSline Page 7
Remarkables by Jonathan Wilson A Few Biblical Questions by Jonathan Wilson
Let me first say that I don’t think the questions I’m going to pose have any business in public discourse. The inescapable fact is, however, that there are those who insist that the Bible is literally true, inerrant as an arbiter of good and evil— right and wrong—and relevant in current political dialogue. Ignoring them seems only to have encouraged them. At one level, I have to concede that one’s religious views are relevant in the political arena. For example, if political candidates believe as a genuine article of faith that humans are the sole and superior creation of the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob (and Mohammad, coincidentally), voters should question the commitment of these politicians to our space program or our long-standing efforts to identify exoplanets and intelligent extraterrestrial life. If political candidates profess belief in the imminence of the “End Times,” they can hardly be trusted to balance the national debt or do anything else that would be prudent in the “long-term.” Heavens, if God is in charge, what we do or don’t do should be pretty much meaningless; there should be no need to vote on anything; and we can just let God take
care of whatever. And, finally, anyone who professes that the Bible contains the complete Truth, literal, unchanging, and supreme in human affairs, can such politicians really be trusted to uphold and defend the US Constitution, under oath or otherwise? Regardless of these incongruities, here are my questions: If the Biblical story of creation is true and God chose to punish Eve with pain in child birth for having tempted poor, hapless Adam, what did all other female mammals do to upset God and get a like penalty? If Jesus died on the cross for all our sins— past, present, and future—why, pray tell, do at least born-again “Christian” women continue to suffer this punishment? If incest is wrong, as I believe that it is, how did God manage to populate the world after creating Adam and Eve, or re-populate the world after the flood destroyed all humans except Noah’s family, without incest? If traditional marriage between one man and one woman is the exclusive, all-fired Biblical model, what about the myriad examples of multiple wives clearly countenanced by God in the Old Testament and espoused by some Mormon subsets even today? If Mary was as young as she appar-
Heavens, if God is in charge, what we do or don’t do should be pretty much meaningless...
ently was, and unaware of God’s designs upon her in advance of her impregnation, wasn’t God guilty of rape both because there was a lack of prior consent and because she was too young to consent even if she’d been asked? If oral and anal sexual intimacy are verboten because, in our creation, God intended for form to follow function and function to follow form, then why do men have nipples? If life for all purposes begins at the moment of conception, then wouldn’t the miscarriage rate of 30% or more of all human pregnancies, also presumably the will of God, make God guilty of more abortions than Planned Parenthood ever thought about performing? The reality is that, apart from the Bible demonstrably not being literally true, what is true is less than clear. If it were clear as the parochial profess, there wouldn’t be between 20,000 and 40,000 “Christian” denominations and there’d be little need for clergy other than as glorified social workers. They would certainly not be needed merely to read the Scriptures aloud to the rest of us. The Bible warns of false prophets; it just gives us darn little guidance for identifying who they are. The Bible doesn’t even foreclose the possibility that a false prophet even knows that they are. I would offer this litmus test: when someone purports to speak for “Christians,” or to advance the notion that the Bible is to
Jonathan Wilson is an attorney at the Davis Brown Law Firm in Des Moines, and chairs the First Friday Breakfast Club (ffbciowa.org), an educational, non-profit corporation for gay men in Iowa who gather on the first Friday of every month to provide mutual support, to be educated on community affairs, and to further educate community opinion leaders with more positive images of gay men. It is the largest breakfast club in the state of Iowa. He can be contacted at JonathanWilson@ DavisBrownLaw.com or 515-288-2500. dictate some particular prescription for governing human affairs, your operating assumption should be that he or she is lying. As said in the opera Porgy and Bess, “The things that you’re liable to read in the Bible, it ain’t necessarily so,” thank God.
ACCESSline Page 8
Section 1: News & Politics
NOVEMBER 2011
Creep of the Week by D’Anne Witkowski Dave Agema
There’s one thing you can say about the state of Michigan: it’s too friendly to gays. I mean, yes, it’s still legal in Michigan to be fired for being gay. And second-parent adoptions aren’t available, meaning that kids with gay parents are only allowed one legally recognized parent despite the fact that they have two, never mind the complete lack of protections for the nonbiological mom or dad. Oh, and then there was that 2004 anti-gay marriage amendment added to the state’s constitution. But hey, I’m just being picky. It’s not like Michigan’s gays are being rounded up and sent to prisons or anything. So who can really complain? Well, public employees, for one. I mean, it’s no secret that Republicans consider public employees a bunch of freeloaders looking for handouts from taxpayers. I mean, to think that teachers or police officers, for example, want things like livable wages and health insurance. Greedy, greedy, greedy. Mind you, if public employees are awful then gay public employees are, obviously, the worst. So it should come as no surprise that Michigan Republicans are, yet again, attacking domestic partner benefits for gay and lesbian state employees. A little background is necessary here. The 2004 marriage amendment included the language “the union of one man and one woman in marriage shall be the only agreement recognized as a marriage or similar union for any purpose.” Supporters of the amendment swore up and down that they were not after domestic partner benefits; they just wanted to make clear that only a penis and a vagina were allowed to say, “I do” to each other. But that whole “or similar union for any purpose” thing led many people to fear otherwise. And wouldn’t you know it, those people were right. Then Attorney General Mike Cox, a Republican, jumped on the chance to declare DP benefits unconstitutional and the Michigan Supreme Court ruled as such in 2008. Public institutions like colleges and universities scrambled to continue offering DP benefits while not blatantly disregarding the ruling by calling them something else and revising the eligibility requirements.
But this just will not do for Michigan I once interviewed Dan Savage and in the military, is lost on him. Republicans who are apparently still asked him if anyone ever reacted negatively Kelly then asked him, “So what would losing sleep over the fact that some gay when he and his boyfriend were out with you do with soldiers like Stephen Hill? and lesbian public employees are receiving their adopted son. Savage kind of dismissed I mean, now he’s out (and) you saw his benefits of any kind for their “roommates,” the question saying you’d have to be a face on camera. When he first submitted as state Rep. Dave Agema, R-Grandville, complete asshole to say something anti-gay this video to us, it was without his face on put it. to a kid’s dads right in camera. Now he’s out. So what would you Ac c o rd i n g to do as president?” It apparently is the role of front of him. the Chicago Tribune, the state to further exacerbate But that was years This is an incredibly important detail. “Republicans say some ago, and while accep- That Hill couldn’t even show his face public employers the inequality its gay and tance of gays and on camera when he first submitted his have gotten around lesbian citizens are subject to lesbians has grown, video and now, just a short time between the implications of under the law and to publicly incivility of the anti- submitting and having his question used, (the 2004) constitugay right seems to have he can show his face is nothing short of tional amendment dismiss their families as grown, too. amazing. by extending the frauds. It’s no secret that But that’s also lost on Santorum who health care benefits the anti-gay right is says that although he wouldn’t kick Hill to domestic partners of the opposite sex, primarily Republican and that the right out since that wouldn’t be fair, “We would along with same-sex partners.” wing of the party has been steadily taking reinstitute that policy, if Rick Santorum Agema is the sponsor of bills that control of the GOP to the point where was president, period.” seek to eliminate these benefits once and they’re less a wing and more the whole He added, “We would move forward for all. The bills passed in the Republican- bird. And what an angry bird it is. conformity with what was happening in controlled state House and are headed to If the GOP debates are any indication, the past, which was, sex is not an issue. It the Republican-controlled Senate. many Republicans are not at all concerned should not be an issue. Leave it alone, keep “It is not the responsibility of taxpay- about coming across as complete assholes. it to yourself, whether you’re a heteroers to support the roommates and unmar- In fact, it seems almost like a prerequi- sexual or a homosexual.” ried partners of public employees,” said site. Ah, yes. We’d go back to fundamentally Agema. “Providing benefits in this way is The Sept. 22 Fox News/YouTube flawed and completely ineffective policy not the role of the state, especially when debate is an excellent case in point. As one that accomplished nothing besides codifytax dollars are in short supply and there might expect during a YouTube debate, ing homophobia. are critical programs being affected by the videos of folks asking the candidates quesAnd that’s apparently how Santorum decrease in revenue.” tions was a big part of the questioning. says, “Thanks for your service, homo.” It apparently is the role of the state, Stephen Hill, a soldier serving in Iraq, however, to further exacerbate the inequal- was one of those video-question-askers. He ity its gay and lesbian citizens are subject said he was gay and wanted to know where to under the law and to publicly dismiss the candidates stood on the “Don’t Ask their families as frauds. Don’t Tell repeal.” The audience booed him. “Michigan voters, our Supreme Court, And not one of the candidates on the stage and the attorney general all agree with seemed to have a problem with this. these bills, and passing legislation is just Well, not at the time, anyway. Rick another way to underline their point to Santorum has since claimed that he didn’t those who don’t seem to get it,” Agema hear the booing and that if he had he would continued. “This is a fiscal issue. We are have totally stood up for that gay soldier. doing all we can to respect the will of “Had I heard them, I certainly would the people and not place an unnecessary have commented on them,” Santorum economic burden on our residents while so said during an interview with Fox News’ many are struggling to make ends meet.” Megyn Kelly. Oh, “this is a fiscal issue,” is it? “I condemn the people who booed that Bullshit. Using Michigan’s economic crisis gay soldier,” he told Kelly. “That soldier as an excuse for going after benefits is a is serving our country. I thank him for smokescreen. The truth is, gay and lesbian his service to our country. I’m sure he’s Full disclosure: I do not watch “Dancing families don’t count in Michigan. Not to the doing an excellent job; I hope he is safe With the Stars.” In fact, I can’t even say people in power, anyway. and I hope he returns safely and does his I’ve ever intentionally viewed it unless mission well.” you count a YouTube clip of Bristol Palin Really? I find this doubtful consider- dancing in a gorilla mask. And then there ing his adamantly anti-gay response to the was the time I was subjected to about 10 question. minutes of the program “I would say any As far as Ablow is while my wife was fliptype of sexual activity through channels. concerned, Bono’s DWTS role ping has absolutely no place And I really wish I could in the military,” he is the ushering in the era of have those 10 minutes responded. “Removing the tranny tween. of my life back. DADT I think tries to Another full discloinject social policy into the military. And sure: I do not love Chaz Bono. I don’t hate the military’s job is to do one thing, and him either, mind you. He’s just not someone that is to defend our country. We need to I think about a lot. He never calls, he never give the military, which is all volunteer, writes. But then again, neither do I. So the ability to do so in a way that is most when I heard he was going to be on DWTS efficient at protecting our men and women I thought, “That’s nice.” I mean, hooray for in uniform. And I believe this undermines transgender visibility and all that, but I still that ability.” wasn’t about to watch the show. He said that DADT repeal meant that Of course, that was before I learned gays in the military had “a special privi- that Bono is making kids who watch the lege” to engage in sexual activity, which is show turn transgender. That’s not even Say what you want about Republicans, not true. Santorum clearly can’t see past something I thought was possible before, but they sure do keep us in suspense about the “sex” in “homosexuality.” The fact that but color me intrigued. how high the homophobic ceiling is inside gays are real people, real people who have Bono, granted, has been rather coy of their “big tent.” sacrificed God knows what in order to serve TTCREEPS continued page 10
Keith Ablow
Rick Santorum
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 1: News & Politics
ACCESSline Page 9
Minor Details: What Would Successful Dating Be? Have you noticed that as we get older, maybe a soul mate who will become the time seems to pass so much quicker than man or woman of our life—we’re likely to when we were school kids sitting out our experience dating as an almost unbearable summer vacations while telling our parents activity. And if we’ve been out of the dating we were bored? The sense that time is scene and just returned, the gamesmanship passing us by can overwhelm our thoughts could drive us batty. and feelings. To use consumer terms, we’ll experience This fear that we’re running out of dating in terms of the products it produces. time enters our dating life when we become And some of those will be lemons. obsessed with the need to be in a hurry to find We’re usually taught by our culture someone before it’s “too late.” I’ve even heard and its approved dating experts to think of a twenty-nine year-old dating in terms of THE ” I’ve even heard a twenty- GOAL. That’s, after all, a express his fear that if he didn’t find a mate before nine year-old express his major definition of any he’s thirty, it’s all over. in our culture. fear that if he didn’t find a success But, as the old You know–set your adage goes: “Life is what mate before he’s thirty, it’s goals, work toward happens while you’re all over. THEM, keep THEM waiting for something in mind at all times, to happen.” So, if we’re going to enjoy dating measure your achievements by how you have at all, we’ve got to pay attention to, and attained THEM. And then measure your own cherish, the life that is happening while we worth by whether you produced, or bought, are doing so. the product that’s the best value. So, first, let’s face the facts. Unless we Applied to dating, this approach means have no standards at all, dating will intro- success is dating that produces the result. And duce us to quite a few people with whom since most of the activities involved in dating we wouldn’t want to spend the rest of a life. don’t do that, frustration, self-judgment, and That’s (and here’s another fact) likely to be disappointment are more likely. the majority of the people we meet. Our culture likes this product-oriented It’s not that they aren’t nice, fine people. approach because its answer to these They might even make the best of friends. inevitable negative feelings is to purchase It’s just that for one reason or another something it’s got to sell us. How about a gym they won’t work as life partners unless we membership, anti-depressants, expensive overlook a lot just to succeed at that supposed face creams, and a new wardrobe? ultimate goal of dating: having someone, and But, there’s another, less-consumer-orieven settling for anyone. ented definition of success that sounds more If we think of dating as just something like the kind we hear in recommendations we have to do to get a particular result— such as: “Live in the present” or “Be here now.”
It’s that success is found in THE PROCESS of dating, not some product of it. Living in the process is difficult because it’s counter-cultural. People who practice it even risk being called crazy, out of touch, losers, or worse. This alternative way of seeing dating isn’t going to fit with any corporate challenge. It means taking our eyes off of any goal and focusing them on ourselves and the very living process that makes our life. It means facing our fears of not knowing how things will turn out. It’s like taking one day at a time, one date at a time, one chance at a time. It means not needing to have the answers about the future of every date. And it even means being happy without the answers. Seeing dating as a process and, therefore, living in every moment of the dating as if each moment we are in while we are in it is the most important thing there is, is difficult. It takes discipline, practice, and reminding oneself to recommit again and again to doing so. It takes being in a community, or creating friends, that love what we’re doing and trust and affirm our own judgments about it. It’s also life-changing. It’s actually what some Buddhists call mindfulness–being conscious about the value of each event as it happens, grounded in this minute without one foot in the past and another in the future. It means not thinking, “I wonder what the future is with this person” while missing what is happening in the present. It means
When the space shuttle went up for the final voyage this summer, there were many questions as to where America was going to go and what would happen to our space program. President Obama cancelled the Constellation project citing the cost of the program was not feasible for the United States government. Obama also suggested that space and planetary exploration should be conducted by private firms rather than the public space agency. There are three essential questions to understanding how we should consider space exploration as a public or private venture. The first is an essential question about government purpose; that whether government is able to spur innovation or whether private firms are the only ones capable of innovation. The second question is to ask who is responsible for the payment of the exploration. The third question is a more subjective where we have to examine the “social benefit”. The first of these is to determine essentially what role of government is to determine if government can spur innovation or whether that should be left to the private companies. Constitutionally, under Article I, the U.S. federal government is empowered to regulate commerce. Thus, can government spur innovation and growth? Observe our military accom-
company. If private companies take over the space exploration, will they also ask for taxpayer assistance like current airline and ethanol production? If so, the question is management of the public funds. Government, by itself, did not build the good rifle, tanks, computers, or long range bombers, but some policy or contract from government often helps this effort. Does innovation need a government initiative to begin? Apple grew out of a garage but the technology that they have used was based upon government contracted work. For example, the Internet is a direct connection to ARPNET which was a military initiative to help connect command centers. We know that space exploration is expensive given that NASA typically spends billions of dollars to launch manned spaceflight. The only entities currently capable of raising that much money are governments. We can be sure private ventures will need an influx of cash in order to carry on the space fights. These companies will be motivated by potential profits of space flights and therefore attempt to lower those costs in order to maximize profit potential. The third of these is to examine the “social benefit” of exploration. We can agree to the mutual idea that space exploration is good and that technology will be learned. With respect to the social benefit of exploration as a private or public venture, we need to understand which one
Robert N. Minor, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus of Religious Studies at the University of Kansas, is author of When Religion Is an Addiction; Scared Straight: Why It’s So Hard to Accept Gay People and Why It’s So Hard to Be Human and Gay & Healthy in a Sick Society. Contact him at www.FairnessProject.org. not moving into some fantasy about what this date could turn out to be, but getting lost in the interactions, sensations, and voices of what is to be relished now. It means giving up our addiction to fantasy all together. And that means rejecting most of what the media of romance feeds us. It means actually paying attention to the people we meet and date. To understand who they are, and not what they could be for
TTMINOR DETAILS cont’d page 38
Space Exploration: A Private or Public Venture by Tony E. Hansen plishments and the Apollo space project. When the United States went to war, the government purchased new and advanced weapons in order to win wars. By doing this, companies were encouraged to innovate weaponry and technology (e.g. Smith and Wesson quick action rifle, guided tanks, long range aircraft, or lunar modules). The result is that commercial firms were able to use these contracts and subsequent advances to create more patents and new technologies. Private companies can innovate because they see a need in society that needs a solution where government cannot. Private companies do not need government to innovate, but the companies will find a mechanism in government policies, if available, (e.g. tax incentives or regulations) to help them innovate. Railroad companies and Apple used laws and government (e.g. patents and train gauge width) to help achieve their success, but their success was highly motivated from within the firm. It is up to the business to understand that regulations may change over time. The second of these is to understand who pays for the exploration. With public exploration, taxpayers are responsible for the innovation and the bureaucracy that is NASA. With private exploration, the customers and stakeholders of company are responsible for the innovations in that
Does innovation need a government initiative to begin?
may compel more social benefit. When Kennedy proposed the Apollo project in 1960s, his objective was to go to the moon. Along the way, various technologies had to be invented and created to support this goal. This spawned a number of companies to innovate and schools to conduct high level research to support this initiative. This became a collective goal as the United States would send hundreds of study probes and manned missions into space to test and to use these technologies. The result was a global, awe-inspiring spirit
TTHANSEN continued page 16
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Section 1: News & Politics
and adoration and glory that comes with being a transgendered person in the United States. No, make that the world. about this whole thing. In fact, it was American Psychiatric Association psychiatrist and Fox News contributor President John M. Oldham, M.D. thinks Keith Ablow who let the tranny cat out otherwise. “There is no evidence that of the tranny bag, as the saying definitely viewing a television game show with a goes. transgender contestant would induce “If you care about your kids, don’t let Gender Identity Disorder in young people,” them watch ‘Dancing with the Stars’ star- he says. ring Chaz Bono,” Ablow wrote in a Sept. 2 But what does Oldham know? He’s opinion piece on the Fox News website. merely the APA president, it’s not like he’s a Why? Because if Fox News commentator kids see Bono strutNaturally supporters of or anything. ting his stuff they’ll get Prop 8 weren’t particularly Ablow’s view that the idea in their head being transgender is that turning tranny happy with this ruling. But some kind of airwave will solve all of their when it became known that born contagion has problems. him some other Walker was not only gay but earned A c c o rd i n g to critics as well, includAblow, these impres- also had been in a 10-year ing Fox News’ own sionable youngsters relationship with a man, Megyn Kelly who called will say to themselves, Prop 8ers went absolutely Ablow out on the Sept. “Maybe all this angst 14 “America Live.” and suffering I’m apoplectic. “Isn’t it just tolerfeeling as I emerge ance?” Kelly asks after into puberty and pass through it isn’t just Ablow declares that letting transgender because I’m changing, but because I should folk be shown on TV in a positive light is change completely—and have my breasts “irresponsible.” In fact, he is so adamant removed or my penis amputated!” about this point that I shudder to think That’s right. Bono will inspire mass what would be an acceptable portrayal amputation of this nation’s pubescent of transgender people on TV in Ablow’s private parts. eyes. “It would be wrong to think that “There’s so much hate out there. gender dysphoria cannot be kindled by There’s so much hate for gays and lesbians celebrating those who have undergone and transgendered people,” Kelly said, sexual reassignment surgery,” Ablow clearly exasperated with Ablow. “The continues. In other words, just by seeing thing is, Doc, you seem to be adding to Bono getting any kind of positive attention, the hate.” kids will want all of the fame and fortune Thankfully, Bono seems to be above
CREEPS
all of that. As he told Extra, “I don’t really pay attention to the haters, but the people who’ve been so supportive have been a huge motivation for me.” Not that Ablow sees it that way. As far as he’s concerned, Bono’s DWTS role is the ushering in the era of the tranny tween. As for people who are already transgender, watching Bono on TV will not turn you trans. It will, however, make you believe that Cher is your mother.
Proposition 8 Legal Defense team
Hey, did you hear the one about the judge who ruled against Prop 8 in California being a homo? And how his ruling shouldn’t count because he’s gay? LOL, am I right? Actually, the idea that a gay judge can’t be trusted to make a ruling on a case that impacts gay people is ridiculous. But that’s the very argument proponents of Prop 8, California’s 2008 anti-gay marriage amendment, are continuing to make about U.S. Chief Judge Vaughn Walker, who struck down the amendment as unconstitutional. “Proposition 8 fails to advance any rational basis in singling out gay men and lesbians for denial of a marriage license,” Walker wrote in his opinion. Naturally supporters of Prop 8 weren’t particularly happy with this ruling. But when it became known that Walker was not only gay but also had been in a 10-year relationship with a man, Prop 8ers went absolutely apoplectic.
NOVEMBER 2011 Ware, who replaced Walker after Walker retired, already ruled that Walker’s ruling is fine and not at all invalid because of his sexual orientation, essentially telling the Prop 8 folks where to go. Ware said that claims that Walker couldn’t be trusted to rule on cases involving LGBT issues was “as warrantless as the presumption that a female judge is incapable of being impartial in a case in which women seek legal relief.” This, of course, only led Prop 8 folks to claim that two judges were wrong. And apparently they’re going to keep on searching until they find a judge who has an answer they like. In an effort to counter claims arguments like Ware’s, the Prop 8 team is claiming that they don’t think gay and lesbian judges aren’t ever fit to rule in LGBT related cases, just not ones that directly impact their lives. “We know of no reason to believe, for example, that Judge Walker would have any personal interest in the outcome of litigation over, say, the constitutionality of the military’s ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy,” they claim. “ Nor would there be any issue with a gay or lesbian judge hearing this case so long as a reasonable person, knowing all of the relevant facts and circumstances, would not have reason to believe that the judge has a personal interest in marrying if Plaintiffs prevailed.” In other words, since Walker was in a 10-year relationship he probably wants to get married, which means his ruling is really just a glitzy high-profile marriage proposal clearly meant to show up the heteros who rely on their local sports stadium’s jumbo-tron or a banner-pulling airplane to pop the question. An obvious red flag here is the term “reasonable person,” since anti-gay marriage foes don’t seem to be the best judge of what a “reasonable person” is. It does not seem particularly reasonable to me to fight tooth and nail to keep civil rights away from a certain group of people arguing that marriage is yours and you’ll be damned if you’re going to share that institution with any queers. Or, in the case of Prop 8ers vs. Judge Walker, let a queer tell you no.
John Boehner Vaughn Walker “But, but, but…he’s one of them, “ they stammered. “Walker is nothing but a secret gay soldier in the war against marriage! He must be stopped!” Prop 8 proponents believe that Walker is an activist judge of the worst kind—the kind that doesn’t rule in their favor. As far as Prop 8 supporters see it, Walker’s ruling is nothing but a blatant display of self-interest. You see, only heterosexuals should be allowed to decide whether or not gays and lesbians are allowed to marry. And so Prop 8 supporters have asked a federal judge to vacate Walker’s ruling because Walker doesn’t count as a real judge since he’s a homo and homo judges should only be able to rule on non-homo cases. Keep in mind that Chief Judge James
The Defense of Marriage Act makes John Boehner weep. Not because of how sadistically cruel it is to gays and lesbians, nor how unconstitutional. No, DOMA
TTCREEPS continued page 16
ACCESSline’s fun guide
Our Picks for November Gloria Reaches Out 11/4, 7:30 PM, Iowa State Center, Ames, AMY GRANT & MICHAEL W. SMITH, www.iastate.edu 11/4-6, Bridge View Center, Ottumwa, ANNIE GET YOUR GUN, www.bridgeviewcenter.com 11/9-13 & 15-23 & 25-27 & 29-30, Civic Center of Greater Des Moines, Des Moines, WICKED, www. civiccenter.org 11/9-20, Sinclair Auditorium, Cedar Rapids, SIMPLY SINATRA, www.orchestraiowa.org
to the Gays By Chris Azzopardi
11/11-12, Orpheum Theater, Omaha,
RAIN: A TRIBUTE TO THE BEATLES,
www.omahaperformingarts.org 11/13, 7 PM, Adler Theatre, Davenport, THE NEW MEL BROOKS MUSICAL-YOUNG FRANKENSTINE, www.adltertheatre.com 11/16-20, Hope Martin Theatre Waterloo Center for the Arts, Waterloo, AND THEN THEY CAME FOR ME:REMEMBERING THE WORLD OF ANNE FRANK, www.waterloocenterforthearts.org 11/18, Mason City: AN EVENING WITH LEANN RIMES - www.leannrimesworld.com 11/18, 8 PM, Hoyt Sherman Place, Des Moines,
LILY TOMLIN, www.hoytsherman.org
11/18-11/20, UNI, Gallagher Bluedorn, Waterloo, THE NUTCRACKER, www.gbpac.org 11/18-27, The Grand Opera House, Dubuque,
IRVING BERLIN’S WHITE CHRISTMAS, www.thegrandoperahouse.com 11/19, 7 PM, Sheraton Hotel, Des Moines, CHARITY MASQUERADE BALL, www.vanwijkwinergy.com
11/20, Iowa State Center, Ames, LORIE LINE AND HER FAB FIVE, www.center.iastate.edu 11/25-12/18, Festhalle Barn, Amana, TANNENBAUM FOREST, www.festivalsinamana.com 11/26, 8 PM, The Surf Ballroom, Clear Lake, VIC FERRARI SYMPHONY ON THE ROCKS, www.surfballroom.com 11/27, 3 & 7 PM, Hoyt Sherman Place, Des Moines, THE OAK RIDGE BOYS, www.hoytsherman.org
...and December
Photos : Jesus Cordero. In this exclusive chat, the Queen of Latin Pop talks conservative upbringing, gay marriage and controversial Target deal. Gloria Estefan isn’t called the Queen of Latin Pop for nothing. Over three decades—and counting—she’s earned it. Since needing a “Dr. Beat” to control her feet in the ’80s, then as part of Miami Sound Machine, Estefan has amassed seven Grammy awards and released 25 albums (selling over 90 million copies of them worldwide), spawning hits like “Conga,” “Reach” and “Rhythm is Gonna Get You”—which it did, many times over. And it will yet again with Miss Little Havana, her first English-language release since 2003 that returns to her Latin-dance roots with producer Pharrell Williams’ urban flair. The album, though, isn’t just getting buzz for being her long-awaited comeback—but the way it’s being released. Estefan partnered with Target, known for its recent support of anti-gay politics, for the release of Miss Little Havana (it’s also available through iTunes). In this exclusive chat, the 54-year-old performer opened up about the deal, why she hopes you’ll give the corporation another chance and just how deep her everlasting love for the gay
12/2-4, Englert Theatre, Iowa City, The Nutcracker, THE NUTCRACKER, www.englert.org
12/16 & 17, Hoyt Sherman Place, Des Moines, TONIC SOL-FA, www.hoytsherman.org
12/21, 7:30 PM, Adler Theatre, Davenport, THE CHRISTMAS MUSIC OF MANNHEIM STEAMROLLER BY CHIP DAVIS, www.adlertheatre.com
Photos : Jesus Cordero.
community goes. Have you done an interview with gay press before? Oh yes, many times. (Laughs) That’s my core audience. These are the people that broke me in a lot of clubs. My gay following has always been cutting edge in music and discovered my stuff before it ever became big on radio. The very first remix we did of “Dr. Beat” was done by a guy named Pablos Flores who became huge in the dance market after that, but he used to spin at a gay club in Puerto Rico and we found out he was a big fan. So they’ve always been a big part of my career. Ever got down and done the conga in a gay club? Not the “Conga,” because in that gay club we were unknown at that time, but I did a lot of dancing there in Puerto Rico. Unfortunately, for me, I haven’t been able to go to any clubs, period—gay or straight—because I’ve been working since I was 17 in a band, so usually I was the one performing when everyone else was having a good time. But I would love that— they’re the most fun clubs, I’m sure. Who does a better conga—gay or straight men? (Laughs) Are you kidding me? You’re actually asking that question? I mean, who dances better, period?! When you look back at your career—the hair, the fashion, all of that—why do you think you make such a great drag queen? I don’t know, but I got to tell you: I love it! Every time I see them, I say, “They do me much better than I do,” because I’m the reluctant diva. I didn’t like being the center of attention, but I had different looks that they were able to reenact— the one in the chaps and the “Mi Tierra” dress—and “Everlasting Love” celebrated all those different looks. I just feel fortunate that somebody would want to do
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ESTEFAN me. (Laughs) It’s been eight years since your last English-language studio album, Unwrapped. Why did you decide to step back from music and showbiz, and what prompted your return? Well, stepping back was easy—I had (my daughter) Emily and I know how quickly time goes by. That’s why my last English album was in 2003—then in 2007 we did 90 Millas—and I purposefully only went out promoting in the summer when she was available to go with me, because she really loves school. My son wasn’t too fond of it, so I dragged him all over the world and he didn’t care. (Laughs) I don’t like to just go into the studio to just go into the studio. I really want to have a musical idea, some creative spark that makes me excited about doing what I’m doing. Pharrell called me—he had written a song for me called “Miss Little Havana”—and he wanted to delve into that Hispanic world and even go further than he already has. It was really a very interesting idea. We clicked so well in the studio that I think this album is a real example of how much we clicked—creatively and on many levels. After we had done the nine tracks with Pharrell, we took it to the club in the last four tracks with different remixers and producers that are on the cutting edge of the clubland side. I wanted to give fans not just the nine concept-y tracks that we did with Pharrell—although they didn’t start that way, there was a storyline I discovered after we finished the songs—and really take it to hardcore dance. Zumba fanatics will love it. (Laughs) While we were doing “Wepa,” Pharrell said, “You have to take it to all those Zumba clubs!” It’s so fast. It’s like a nuclear merengue with the urban sensibility from Pharrell and the drunk guy on trombone in the street festival, so we kept thinking, “They’re going to sweat to this one!” You said your 2004 world tour would be your last. Have you changed your mind? Are you going to pull a Cher on us? I don’t have a tour planned. What I’ve been doing is just going to places worldwide, little by little. And I’ll always do something. I never ever said that I was
Photos : Jesus Cordero. retiring. I said I was just going to stop doing those world tours and that was going to be the last one, and it did end up being that. You never say never, but I really don’t foresee doing that kind of thing again. I will do different, interesting and unique stuff, but it’s like boot camp for me. It’s hard on me. Your song “Always Tomorrow” was a lifeline for so many people, especially your gay fans—including myself. How does it feel knowing that? I love that. That’s one of my favorite songs I’ve ever written, so that makes me happy. You know, that was the idea. When
Photos : Jesus Cordero.
I wrote that tune it was like a message of hope. I wanted to celebrate the hero in each of us and the fact that we can survive and be stronger. I’ve had fans tell me they were going to do themselves in and this song came on the radio and they felt better; they actually got through some really tough moments, so that to me is the best reason to do what I do—that I can somehow get into people’s brains and hearts that I may never meet, and get them through. That’s what music was for me. I had a really tough time growing up and other people’s music got me through those moments, so it means a lot to me that that was good for you, as well. It’s a song that so many gay kids who were bullied into suicide should’ve heard before they took their own life. I know. I did a video message for the It Gets Better campaign and I talked about that—that when I was 15 I felt so overwhelmed and everything was so heavy on me that, believe me, I thought about it. Kids think that problems are going to last forever and they need to realize that life changes in a second. I can understand where they get overwhelmed, but we have a short enough time as it is on this earth without having to end it early. Considering how Target has supported anti-gay candidates and indirectly anti-gay causes, there’s been much controversy in the gay community surrounding your partnership
NOVEMBER 2011 with them for the release of Miss Little Havana. What do you have to say to gay fans who might question your support for them? To my gay fans, I would say this: Always go with your heart and do what you need to do, because I think that every human being needs to stand on principle. But I’ve got to tell you: I would never work with someone who is anti-gay. I know that they donated to a third party who then donated to this candidate and—I did my homework—since then they donated $150,000 to that candidate. They apologized profusely for having done so, and they have established an actual committee that oversees all political donations to make sure that this doesn’t happen again. They’ve also donated a half-million dollars to LGBT organizations. They’re part of the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce. They give domestic partner benefits. They have 300,000 employees that are from all walks of life, and it’s very important for them to be supportive. They’ve extended family medical leave benefits and adoption benefits to their gay employees. They’ve really supported very much their gay peeps. Believe me, in my own life I’ve gone through a lot of these things. When I had Obama at my house, I got nailed by the Cuban community—even though I’m not affiliated politically. Sometimes the information you want to get out there doesn’t, because the first thing that blows up is what people hear. So I will always respect what (my gay fans) want to do, but I have a long history with Target. I’ve put out my children’s book, we’ve done programs for the troops—they really have been very supportive, so I would say: Do some more research, check out what Target has done to make up for its gaffe—and they know it was a gaffe. It was lack of information, not knowing everything about everybody that your money goes to. I was actually very surprised when that whole Target thing happened, but I know how these things happen. I’ve been on other side of that. So give them another shot and if not, I respect very much whatever they may want to do or need to do to stand up for whatever principles they’re upholding. I just want them to know that I’m so supportive of the LGBT community. They’ve been a big part of my success and they’ve always been there for me. I would not want to do anything that hurts them. Your birthplace of Cuba has evolved a lot in the way it treats gay people. In the ’70s, many LGBT people were imprisoned simply for being gay. What do you remember it being like for gay people? Well, I was a baby. I came over here when I was 18 months old, so I really have no real memories of Cuba. But I always stay on top of the news from Cuba and I know that Raúl Castro’s daughter is gay and she’s trying to do a lot for that community, but Cuba in general—just that macho mentality—was tough even though it was one of the wildest places in the world. They’ve come a long way, but they did horrendous things when the AIDS epidemic came out. And since nobody has rights in Cuba, imagine the gays in Cuba— just regular schmoes have no rights and
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NOVEMBER 2011
the fun guide
The Outfield by Dan Woog Gay Sports’ Hot 100
To John Amaechi’s long list of achievements—former NBA basketball player, gay activist, human rights advocate—add another: Order of the British Empire. Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II has tabbed the hoopster-turned-social entrepreneur for the “honour,” bestowed Oct. 26 at Buckingham Palace. His selection has drawn kudos from disparate quarters. National Basketball Association commissioner David Stern called Amaechi “an inspiration to millions”; Director of Amnesty International UK Kate Allen cited his work “promoting a greater understanding of human rights in all sports.” Amaechi certainly deserves the Order. But he’s not the only LGBT sports figure worthy of praise. The roster of gay sports figures—and their accomplishments— grows, seemingly by the day. Finally they’ve been compiled, all in one place. It’s quite an impressive list. Outsports—the go-to website for all things sporting and queer— has released “the 100 most important moments in gay sports history.” Reading what’s happened since 1969 is both educational and empowering. (Full disclosure: I helped research the list. And, I am proud to say, publication of my book “Jocks: True Stories of America’s Gay Male Athletes,” makes the cut—barely— at No. 99.) The “Top 100” includes some names that are very familiar, some that are lesser known, and a few obscurities. All have contributed to the current, explosive and largely positive state of LGBT sports. The list begins at No. 100 with “University of Florida settles lawsuit with Andrea Zimbardi.” The 2004 case involved an honor student and softball captain, who was kicked off the team because of suspicions she was a lesbian. The settlement mandated the first-ever homophobia training for coaches and administrators at a major university. Another important lawsuit occurred at Penn State, around the same time. Jen Harris was kicked off the basketball team by coach Rene Portland for— surprise!— being a lesbian. Portland was fined $10,000 by the university. She later resigned. Other less-than-stellar gay sports moments include New York Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey declaring he would not want a gay teammate; gay soccer star Justin Fashanu committing suicide, and Atlanta Braves pitcher John Rocker
spewing homophobic comments in a Sports Illustrated interview. Most of the top 100 events, however, are positive. The San Francisco Giants were the first professional sports team to make an “It Gets Better” video, encouraging young teens. Other squads, in a variety of leagues, followed suit. New York Rangers hockey player Sean Avery is an outspoken proponent of gay marriage. His activism played a role in this year’s vote by New York legislators to legalize same-sex nuptials. Also in New York, “Take Me Out”—a play about a gay baseball player— made its mark on Broadway. Two significant things happened: It won a Tony Award for Best Play, and brought gay men who did NOT necessarily love theater, to the theater. At the University of Pennsylvania, the formation of Penn’s Athletes and Allies Tackling Homphobia and Heterosexism (PATH) presaged the rise of similar groups on other college campuses. Allies were also in the news when Hudson Taylor—a straight University of Maryland wrestler—wore a Human Rights Campaign sticker on his headgear. He went on to form Athlete Ally, a support group that works tirelessly to challenge homophobia and transphobia in sports. Some of the events on Outsports’ list sound almost random. In 2010, the Stanley Cup—won earlier that year by the Chicago Blackhawks—had a position of honor at that city’s Gay Pride parade. Others are truly distinctive, like the publication in 1974 of Patricia Nell Warren’s seminal novel “The Front Runner,” and the first-ever Gay Games in 1982. But it is coming out that may be the most prevalent and important thread throughout Outsports’ list. Just as John Amaechi’s announcement shined a light on pro basketball, other men and women have had similar effects on their own teammates, coaches and fans. Virtually every sport is represented: football (Esera Tuaolo, Roy Simmons), baseball (Billy Bean), hockey (Brendan Burke), swimming and diving (Mark Tewksbury), golf (Muffin Spencer-Devlin), wrestling, mountain biking, women’s boxing, dressage, bodybuilding—even cricket and hurling. The top two stories on the list, in fact, involve coming out: tennis star Martina Navratilova in 1981, and former football player Dave Kopay five years earlier. Some of the sports in which LGBT athletes have come out are major. Others are minor, even obscure. Still—even in 2011—it takes courage for any athlete, in any event, to say those few words. John Amaechi said them four years ago. He had no idea what would happen afterward. Would he be vilified? Shunned? Perhaps even physically assaulted? None of that happened. Instead, the Queen of England put a medal around his tall, gay neck. Dan Woog is a journalist, educator, soccer coach, gay activist, and author of the “Jocks” series of books on gay male athletes. Visit his website at .danwoog.com. He can be reached care of this publication or at OutField@qsyndicate.com.
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Deep Inside Hollywood by Romeo San Vicente Justin Timberlake’s got the beat
Justin Timberlake photo by Screen Gems If you’re old enough to remember disco’s heyday, then you know Casablanca Records. It was the dance music record label of the 1970s, home to Donna Summer, The Village People, Cher and even Kiss (who scored their one disco hit thanks to the label). And it was masterminded by marketing genius Neil Bogart, who was as extravagant and party-minded as the times themselves. Well now Spinning Gold, a biopic about the late music mogul, is in the works with Justin Timberlake acting as both producer and star. There’s no other cast or details just yet (for example, who’ll play Summer and Cher? Where will they find enough rollerskates?), but when it all falls into place you can expect a trip into hedonism, hit songs, happy-making chemicals and “Hot Stuff.”
Lee Daniels taking a trip to Valley of the Dolls
In 1966 it was a wildly popular, groundbreaking scandal of a novel. Then, in 1967 it was a wildly popular (and compellingly bad) movie. Over the years there’ve been sequels to the book, a TV miniseries version in the ’80s and even a low-budget, syndicated late-night soap opera in the 1990s. The cult of Jacqueline Susann’s Valley of the Dolls is that strong, with new generations discovering its retro glamour and trashy appeal. So it makes sense that Precious director Lee Daniels wants to resurrect it all once again for television. His plan is for a primetime series, not cheap midnight fare, but that’s about the only information available for now. In other words, there’s little more here than an announcement, but sometimes announcements are all you need to stir up the excitement of hardcore Valley fans. Details as they develop.
and producer Steve Carell, the forthcoming Showtime series promises interviews and profiles of the most prolific comic talents of the past fifty years. The short list alone is impressive: Carell, Ellen DeGeneres, Tina Fey, Jane Lynch, Sarah Silverman, Judd Apatow, Mel Brooks, Chris Rock, Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Carl Reiner, Don Rickles and more. In other words, over the course of the 10-episode series, you’ll get to hear way too many firsthand accounts of what drives funny people to do what they and witness the mechanics of comedy dissected by people who are usually always “on.” The punchline? You have to wait until 2012.
The Glee Project refuses to stop believing
Glee? A record-breaking pop culture phenomenon. But The Glee Project? Less so. How much less so? Well, remember that 3D Glee concert movie that nobody went to see? The low-rated Glee Project was sort of like that, only free and on television. In other words, they couldn’t give it away. But sometimes shows just need time to develop and build their audience. And the powers that be must have gotten at least something of what they wanted from the reality competition, because a second season casting call is already in the works. Will tenacity pay off for the struggling Oxygen show? Will an audience rise up to meet it during season two? And does it matter? Because either way, it’s probably a cost-effective way to restock the show as aging “high schoolers” move on, no matter how many people tune in for the process.
Alan Cumming visits a less groovy 1970s in Any Day Now
The struggle for LGBT marriage equality and adoption rights makes the news pretty regularly now and each step forward feels like a small victory. Now imagine dealing with all of that in 1979. That’s the subject of Any Day Now, a film about gay adoption, inspired by a true story, written and directed by Travis Fine (The Space Between) and produced by Anne O’Shea (The Kids Are All Right). It stars Alan Cumming (The Good Wife) and Garret Dillahunt (Raising Hope) as a couple who take in an abandoned teenage boy with Down Syndrome. When the authorities learn that gay men are acting as caretakers, they step in to remove the boy and the family’s fight begins. The film, which also stars Frances Fisher as a family court judge, will explore the issues faced by families—then and, by
When the authorities learn that gay men are acting as caretakers, they step in to remove the boy and the family’s fight begins.
Ellen DeGeneres and Jane Lynch will make it a Laughing Stock
Comedy junkies, get ready, because Laughing Stock is coming. A project from veteran comic/director David Steinberg
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NOVEMBER 2011
Cocktail Chatter by Ed Sikov Irene
“Jack Fogg started it,” I whined. “You sound like a 6-year-old,” Dan replied. “But he did! It wasn’t my fault.” “Oh yes it was,” Dan said with finality. “He held out the bait, but you’re the one who made the choice to bite.” I hate this kind of conversation—where you begin in satisfying moral outrage and end in abject shame. This one flipped in 15 seconds. I had no time to vent before Dan terminated the discussion with his wise observation, which was a line I’d used on him about eight months ago. There had been un petit scene at the beach house. It was mercifully short— no blood, no corpses—but only because I bit my tongue and didn’t point out to Mr. Harvard C. N. N. Aging Prepster that he was the most obnoxious ass I had ever plowed, and that he’d taken quite a different tone with me when I rammed my etc. etc. etc. We were all lined up on loungers around the pool: Jack Fogg, Sammy, Paolo, Chipper, Dan and me. Having finished
sweeping up the leaves and branches that littered the deck, we stripped down to our swimsuits, and were happily watching in lust as the shirtless, straight, but turned-on-by-gay-gawkers pool boy skimmed and vacuumed more leaves out of the pool. Each of us had un cocktail du weekend in hand, and life was beautiful. Then Jack Fogg cleared his throat portentously. My back was up even before he said anything. “Don’t you think you’re being, uh, a little o bv i o u s ? ” “Ab o u t what?” I snarled. “I mean, really. Hurricanes?” He snickered smugly. “It’s a theme drink,” I said with forced merriment—“the bartender’s answer to occasional verse.” “Every queen on this island is drinking Hurricanes this weekend,” Jack Fogg barreled on. “You made us trite.” I noted with bitter amusement that he was polishing off his second Hurricane at the time. “I told you,” I said, irritated. “They are not Hurricanes. They are Irenes.” “You only used guava juice instead of passion fruit because the Pantry sold out of passion fruit. Their entire stock
I hate this kind of conversation—where you begin in satisfying moral outrage and end in abject shame.
of passion fruit juice had already been snapped up by every other cliché-prone cocktail dominatrix in the Pines.” Dan’s hand shot over and held my arm down. He knew that I was about to throw my Irene in Jack Fogg’s face. “Boys,” said Paolo. “Girls,” said Chipper. “Dudes!” said Sammy. “You’re both out of your friggin’ minds! I don’t care what they’re called or what’s in them or whether they’re named ‘Michele Bachmanns.” “Wait a m i n u t e ,” D a n objected, but Sammy steamrolled through. “They’re awesome!” “I named them,” Chipper announced. “What? You think ‘The Irene’ is clever? That was the goddamn storm’s name!” This came not from Jack but from Paolo. “I didn’t call them ‘the Irene.’ They are simply, chicly named ‘Irene.’ Just one diamond-solitaire word. Like Adrian or Travilla. In fact, like Irene!” I high-fived Chipper for his command of one-named costume designers from the 1930s. “Who?” asked Sammy. “Never mind,” I said, winking at Chipper. “You’re too young. And that’s why we adore you.” I got up, knelt next to Sammy, kissed him squarely on his rock-like six-pack, and headed for the kitchen to make another round.
hair. (Question: Do you really have to wax everything off to go on an Atlantis cruise?) My creation was simple: Absolut Pears with a little ginger liqueur mixed in. I added a touch of homemade ginger syrup, but it would be fine without it. But what would I call it? As housemate after housemate trooped past wearing Speedos, in my halfinebriated state I became aroused, then angry. So I belligerently rejected all their naming suggestions, which were uniformly based on the suffix “tini.” This abomination drives me crazy. Just because a drink is vodka-based and destined for a classic cocktail glass does not mean it must be called, in this case for example, a Gingertini. Then Jack Fogg brought up the rear (so to speak) and redeemed every snotty thing he ever said by violating my strict anti-tini law and dubbing the new ginger cocktail The TinaTini in honor of Tina Louise. The TinaTinis tasted better and better the more of them I consumed. At the end of the main course, I made a little joke at Phil Levine’s expense: “And who would like a nice bowl of homemade ginge’ rice queen—I mean ginger ice cream!” There were giggles from Jack and Sammy, a glare from Dan, and a lawyerly, eye-to-eye stare-down from the victim of my petit bon mot, bulldog Phil. “Why is my attraction to Asian men so hilarious to you?” he asked me point-blank. “Do you think it’s about girly-boy guys with 28-inch waists as if I’d really like 11-year-old white kids but make do with legal-age Asians or is it the old sexual-endowment canard, ’cause I tell you what, you *sshole, I’ve had Asian guys better endowed than you, lots, ha.” “I’m slorry, Phil,” I squealed. “I guess I don’ know’nough’boudit.” I offered my hand in drunken friendship. Did he really refuse to shake my hand? I let it sort of wave in the air, just like the late Queen Mum. I was in no shape for backtalk. “I’smorry again, Philip,” I managed to get out, “but now’s not the time for shoshiography— shoshilogy, I mean.” At which point, I am told, I leaned back in my chair and fell asleep.
Just because a drink is vodka-based and destined for a classic cocktail glass does not mean it must be called, in this case for example, a Gingertini.
“Irene”—a Category 5 Cocktail • 2 oz. dark rum • 2 oz. light rum • 1 oz. guava juice • .5 oz. orange juice • 1 squirt lemon juice
Add all the ingredients to a tall glass, stir, add some ice, and serve. Makes one drink.
Do I Contradict Myself? I Contain Many Drinks: The TinaTini The housemates season just got to me, along with a few of my last cocktail du weekend du season, which I invented minutes before Unhappy Hour began. The words “beware of dog” were written all over my face. I’d had it with everyone but Dan—Jack Fogg and his ego, Sammy and his perfect little body, Phil Levine and all the fawning Asian geisha boys who’d passed through the house for the last four months…I was sick of myself, too—the humiliating blend I’d become of one of the losers at open mic night at some comedy club: the Little Red Hen, Max the bartender and Shirley Booth as “Hazel.” It was too breezy for the beach, but the deck was sunny and protected from the wind, so there they were, all lined up on chaises like Atlantis boys with body
The TinaTini
• 1 oz. Absolut Pears • 1 tablespoon Domaine de Canton ginger liqueur • ginger syrup to taste (optional) For every ounce of Absolute Pears you pour into a shaker full of ice, add one tablespoon Domaine de Canton ginger liqueur and, if you have any, ginger syrup to taste. Shake. Serve.
the fun guide
NOVEMBER 2011
ACCESSline’s STATEWIDE Recurring Events List
ACCESSline Page 15
Hear Me Out by Chris Azzopardi Erasure, Tomorrow’s World
The following list is provided by—and corrected by—ACCESSline readers like you. If you would like to add an event, or if you notice a mistake in this list, please email editor@ ACCESSlineIOWA.com.
Interest Group Abbreviations: L: Lesbian G: Gay +: HIV-related D: Drag W: General Women’s Interest
Sunday Every Sunday, GLBT AA, 5-6 PM, at First Baptist Church at 500 N. Clinton St., Iowa City. For more info about Intergroup and Alcoholics Anonymous call the 24-Hour Answering Service at 319-338-9111 or visit the AA-IC website: http://aa-ic.org/. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Sunday, L WORD LIVES: L NIGHT, 7PM, at the Firewater Saloon, 347 South Gilbert St., Iowa City, 319-321-5895. The night will start with Season 1, Episode 1 of the L Word... because a good thing should never die. FoLLowing the L Word wiLL be a Drag King show at 9:30 p.m. No cover. Tel, 319-321-5895. [ L B T W D ] Every Sunday, THE QUIRE: EASTERN IOWA’S GLBT CHORUS REHEARSALS, 6-8:30 PM, at Zion Lutheran Church, 310 N. Johnson St., Iowa City. Membership is open to all GLBT folks, as well as allies who support the community. There are no auditions; you only need to be willing to attend rehearsals regularly and learn your music. The Quire prepares two full concerts each year in the winter and spring, and occasionally performs shorter programs at events in the Iowa City/Cedar Rapids area. The Quire is a member of Gay and Lesbian Association of Choruses (GALA), and has developed a reputation for excellence and variety in its concert programs. For more info, visit http:// www.thequire.org/. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Sunday, QUEER GUERRILLA BRUNCH, Locations around Iowa City to be announced each week. LGBTQIs & Allies gather for Sunday brunch to celebrate community and create visibility. Sign up for future brunches on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/group. php?gid=120517046371 [ L G B T M W A ] Every Sunday, RAINBOW AND ALLIED YOUTH, 8:00pm-11:00pm, The Center, 1300 Locust, Des Moines, IA 50309. Social group for Queer youth 25 years and under [ L G B T ] Every Sunday, OMAHA FRONTRUNNERS/ WALLKERS, 10 AM. For more information call 402-804-8720. [ L G B T M W A ] Second Sunday, GAY MEN’S MEDITATION GROUP, 2 pm, Iowa City/Corridor Area, 319-354-3285 for more information. [ G B T M] Second Sunday, LGBT MOVIE NIGHT, 2 p.m., Johnson County Senior Center, 28 S. Linn St., room 202 , Iowa City, IA 52240. A series of narrative and documentary movies focusing on lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender issues with informal discussions afterward. An encore screening and discussion of each movie will be offered on the following evenings to accommodate more participants. The selections will share with the audience some of the traumas and successes experienced by the LGBT community throughout history, as well as center around gay love stories and the universal search for meaningful relationships. For more information, or to request a favorite title, contact the series organizer, Elsie Gauley Vega, at 319-337-4487 or jgvega@hotmail.com. [ L G B T ]
Monday
1st 2nd Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG NORTH IOWA CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, at First Presbyterian Church, 100 S. Pierce St., Mason City. Meetings are held the First and Second Monday (alternating) of the month. For more info, call 641-583-2848. [ L G B T M WAK] 1st Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG QUAD CITIES CHAPTER MEETING, 6:30 PM, at Eldridge United Methodist Church, 604 S. 2nd St., Eldridge. For more info, call 563-285-4173.
B: Bisexual T: Transgender A: General Interest K: Kids and Family M: General Men’s Interest
[LGBTMWAK] 3rd Monday of the Month, SOUTH CENTRAL NEBRASK (HASTINGS) PFLAG, 7 p.m., First Congregational United Church of Christ, 2810 W. 7th, Hastings, [ L G B T M W A] 4th Monday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG WAUKON/NORTHEAST CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, First Lutheran Church, 604 West Broadway Street , Decorah, IA 52101. in the Fellowship Hall at First Lutheran Church, Decorah. 604 West Broadway Street. (563) 382-2638 [ L G BTMWA] Every Monday, DES MOINES GAY MEN’S CHORUS REHEARSALS, 7pm-9:30pm, Plymouth Congregational Church, 4126 Ingersoll Avenue, Des Moines, IA . For more information about singing with the Chorus, contact Rebecca Gruber at 515-865-9557. The Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus does not discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation. [ G M A ] Every Monday Wednesday Thursday Saturday, GLBT ONLY AA MEETINGS IN DES MOINES, 6 PM - SAT 5 PM, at 945 19th St. (east side of building, south door). [ L G B T M W A ] Monday, DIVERSITY CHORUS REHEARSALS, 7:00 - 8:30 p.m., Westminster Presbyterian Church, 4114 Allison Ave., Des Moines, IA 50310. Des Moines Diversity Chorus welcomes new singers, begins 02/07/2011. No audition required. Singing with meaning since 1997! Call Julie Murphy at 515-255-3576 for more information. No cost to members. Rehearsals continue on Monday evenings through 5/2/11. [LGBTMWAD]
Tuesday
1st Tuesday of Every Month, OUT, 6:307:30 PM, Monarch Therapy Services, Waterloo Office 3356 Kimball Ave Ste. 5, Free Support Group for the LGBTQ Community in the Cedar Valley! [L G B T D A W M ] 2nd Tuesday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG AMES CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, Youth and Shelter Services Offices, 420 Kellogg Ave., 1st Floor, Ames, IA 50010. Meets in the Paul Room of Youth and Shelter Services at 420 Kellogg Avenue, Ames. For more info, call 515-291-3607. [LGBTMWAK] 2nd Tuesday of the Month, CEDAR RAPIDS UNITY BOARD MEETING, 6:30-8 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . at 6300 Rockwell Dr, Cedar Rapids. Meetings are open to the general public. For more info, call 319-366-2055 or visit: http:// www.crglrc.org [ L G B T M W A ] 2nd Tuesday of the Month, SPIRITUAL SEEKERS, 7-8:30 PM, Iowa City, IA . at Trinity Episcopal Church, 320 E. College St, Iowa City. Spiritual Seekers is a group for people of all faiths, or of little faith, who wish to make deeper connections between their sexual identities and the spiritual dimension in their lives. Meetings include discussion of specialized topics, telling of pieces of our faith journeys, and occasional prayer and meditation. (On the 4th Tuesday of each month, the group gathers at a local restaurant for food and fellowship.) For more info, contact Tom Stevenson: tbstevenson@mchsi. com or 319.354.1784. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Tuesday, OUT (OUR UNITED TRUTH): A GLBT SUPPORT GROUP, 7-8:30 PM, Peoples Church Unitarian Universalist, 600 3rd Avenue Southeast, Cedar Rapids, IA 52401. For more info, call 563-359-0816. [ L GBTMWA] Every Tuesday, ACE INCLUSIVE BALLROOM, 7-8:30 PM, Old Brick, 26 East Market
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Over 25 years ago, when Erasure came together, Vince Clarke and Andy Bell were on the cutting-edge of the synth-pop music scene. Their songs were, well, today’s world. Again, with their 14th album, they’re looking ahead, bringing electromusic mastermind Frankmusik’s trademark progpop (fun fact: the producer was born the same year, 1985, Erasure formed) into the fold of their bittersweet meditations on love, loss and healing. Set opener “Be With You” is a slick charmer, but it’s not the only one: “Then I Go Twisting” is a glitchy piece of divine dance that’s fantastically liberating, and “Fill Us With Fire” opens with one of Bell’s most affecting vocals before bursting into a joyous rush of disco delight. The music itself is inviting, inventive and contemporary, a work that—with Frank’s keen sense of synths and modern-day sounds—shows Erasure can keep up with the kids they once inspired. But some things never change, and Bell’s heartfelt bellow is, wisely, pulled front and center, singing the hell out of the hook on “When I Start To (Break It All Down).” “A Whole Lotta Love Run Riot,” intriguingly taking on a troubled starlet (“We’ve had it up to here with your strange behavior”), is also ear candy, featuring some French intones and stuttery vocals. Nine songs go by fast, but even briefly, Erasure proves an indelible force decades later. Here’s to 25 more years. Grade: B+
ambitious, taking a conceptual narrative about a woman whose lover leaves her and stretching it over a classically influenced song cycle. The follow-up to her seasonal Midwinter Graces, Amos’ latest could be an extension of it—woodwinds, strings and some of her best piano playing in years are the foundation for the songs, and again her precocious daughter, 10 at the time of recording, offers her enchanting voice. Two of those duets especially stick with you: “SnowBlind,” a lilting beauty with a mesmerizing backand-forth between mother and daughter, and “Job’s Coffin,” the closest she comes to pop. Fourteen of them, at over 70 minutes of similar-sounding tempos, is overdoing it, considering how Hunters is meant to work as a linear account. But this, taken as a whole or in parts, trumps much of the musician’s output over the last decade—with spotty releases like Abnormally Attracted to Sin—because of its genuine beauty, instantly feeling like classic Tori. Striking in its intensity, “Shattering Sea” opens with snaggy strings that rip through a frantic piano line, reminiscent of an Amos fan favorite, “Yes, Anastasia.” And songs like “Your Ghost” and “Carry,” with their lovely purity, conjure up “Winter” and “Baker Baker.” It’s good to hear Tori back to her old self again. Grade: B
Vince Clarke and Andy Bell were on the cuttingedge of the synth-pop music scene. Their songs were, well, today’s world.
Tori Amos, Night of Hunters
Big ideas, like a troupe of multiple personalities (American Doll Posse) or a post-9/11 thesis (Scarlet’s Walk), have always attracted Tori Amos. But Night of Hunters might just be the songstress’ most
Also Out
Tony Bennett, Duets II For all the great pairings on the crooner’s queer affair—just look at the guest list— one especially stands out: the late Amy Winehouse on “Body and Soul,” leaving her unmistakable drawl on a lovely track that’s a bittersweet send-off. But it isn’t the only one worth hearing. Lady Gaga, of course, is spectacularly playful on “The Lady is a Tramp,” a refreshing alternative to the pop megastar’s dance heavy-hitters. “Blue Velvet” gets lesbian-friendly with k.d. lang’s caressing vocals. Mariah Carey soulfully closes out the album with “When Do the Bells Ring for Me” with a lush coo that’s one of her most easy-going performances in years. And then, of course, there’s Tony himself, who hasn’t lost that magic in his voice—even at 85 years old. Lady Antebellum, Own the Night One of the most overrated bands in music, Lady Antebellum lucked out by having the only decent song on their last album, “Need You Now,” catapult them into popcountry megastars. Maybe, like said song, you have to be drunk to realize how much you love it, because hardly a thing about the band’s third album is even the least bit interesting, heartfelt or worthy of the praise they’ve been given. Songs on Own the Night are so annoyingly cloying they belong on a “For My Brokenheart” mix tape, but that’s not even the worst of it: The production is blandly vanilla, though the Celtic outro on “Cold as Stone” is a nice touch, and they have less to say about love than Taylor Swift. Next time
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HOLLYWOOD extension, right now as everything starts to change, bit by bit, for the better. It just finished principal photography and will probably start showing up at film festivals in 2012.
Jena Malone aims for Lonely Hunter
the fun guide acclaimed young actress Jena Malone (Sense and Sensibility, Bastard Out of Carolina), with lesbian cred behind the camera provided by screenwriter Sarah Schulman (The Owls) and director/ producer Deborah Kampmeier (Virgin, Hound Dog). Meanwhile, you can bet that indie A-listers will be lining up to grab the roles of McCullers’ pals Tennessee Williams, Truman Capote, Ethel Waters and Gypsy Rose Lee. None of them will look as cool as Malone in McCullers’s signature menswear, but they can give it a shot. Pre-production is where it’s at right now, so it’ll be a while before audiences get a chance to look at it. Read a book while you’re waiting.
Roseanne Barr is Downwardly Mobile again
So they axed Roseanne’s Nuts. Big deal. It’s not like she needed the money. And besides, the blue-collar comedy diva’s Hawaiian macadamia farm isn’t going to keep her from fulfilling her TV destiny. She just sold a show to NBC—the network that passed on Roseanne back in 1987, oops—and the title makes it sound like the Connor family might be back in business again. It’s called Downwardly Mobile, about a trailer park family struggling to make ends meet. No, it didn’t sound appealing to the Suits back in 1987, either, but look what happened: America responded to the grittier version of reality and poverty-based humor of Barr’s first series and
then went along for the ride when she introduced lesbian smooching later in the show’s run. Who knows what she’ll accomplish this time? Stay tuned as the outspoken heroine of the working class starts kicking up dust again.
The Revolution will be televised and it will star Tim Gunn
What are they replacing all of those canceled soap operas with? Talk shows, that’s what. Everybody wants to be The Talk, The View or The Chew these days, and ABC is aiming for another ratings grab with January 2012’s The Revolution. The self-improvement/lifestyle-oriented show will include Project Runway’s Tim Gunn, fitness and nutrition guru Harley Pasternak and Extreme Makeover: Home Edition’s gung-ho host Ty Pennington. And those are just the first three to be announced. Given the current trend of large panels with rotating experts and guest co-hosts, the field is still wide open for other names to hop on board and help the fledgling show make audiences feel guilty for sitting on the couch and watching TV. And in the long run, with Oprah more or less out of the picture, it’s anybody’s game to win the daytime sweepstakes. Best of all, it can only help The Soup with new material. Romeo San Vicente flies solo but he’s never lonely. He can be reached care of this publication or at DeepInsideHollywood@qsyndicate.com.
Carson McCullers, the author of The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter, was bisexual and frequently involved with women
Jena Malone. Photo : Helga Esteb / Shutterstock.com She was married to a man, but Southern literary icon Carson McCullers, the author of The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter, was bisexual and frequently involved with women. And now her life story will come to the big screen in Lonely Hunter. The biopic is set to star
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CREEPS makes him weep because he is in love with it. I dare say that Boehner wants to marry DOMA. But he can’t. Because that’s not legal. However, Boehner can live in sin with DOMA so long as it’s still on the books. And he’s fighting like hell to keep it there. You may recall that President Obama declared that DOMA was unconstitutional and that his administration wouldn’t defend DOMA in court. Boehner went bananas and decided that if Obama wouldn’t defend his beloved DOMA, then he would, personally. Not by himself, mind you, but with the help of a Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group. Don’t let the name fool you. There’s nothing bipartisan about this group. It has a decidedly pro-DOMA Republican majority telling House lawyers what to do. The two Democrats in the group are basically window dressing. On October 8 Boehner graced the stage of the Value Voters Summit, one of the most anti-gay conventions in the United States. “I’ve raised my hand to uphold and defend
the Constitution of the United States and the laws of our country,” said Boehner. “And if the Justice Department was not going to defend this act passed by Congress, well, then we will. And we have defended the law that the Congress passed.” Boehner and Company’s latest legal maneuver is to argue that because gays and lesbians have political clout they don’t deserve the kind of legal protections that, say, racial minorities receive. Oh, got it. Since homosexuals aren’t downtrodden little match girls, they’re on their own. The government isn’t going to step in and protect them from discriminatory laws. Also, the proDOMA congressmen argue that DOMA isn’t bothering anybody. “There is nothing intrusive in the least about DOMA,” they said. “It is simply a definitional statute that defines, for federal law purposes, marriage and spouse.” Got it? It’s just a simple little definition. No harm no foul. Unless, of course, you consider what falls under “for federal law purposes.” If a gay couple married in, say, Massachusetts moves to, say, Michigan wants to file a joint tax return, no dice.
John Boehner went bananas and decided that if Obama wouldn’t defend his beloved DOMA, then he would, personally. Not by himself, mind you, but with the help of a Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group.
Social Security survivor benefits? Nope. Need an I-130 visa so your immigrant spouse isn’t deported? Too bad, so sad. But hey, that’s not intrusive at all. “A spate of recent news stories only confirms the conclusion that homosexuals are far from politically powerless,” the filing says. “Accordingly, gays and lesbians cannot be labeled ‘politically powerless’ without draining that phrase of all meaning.” In other words, “Quit yer whining, homos. Sure you’re still discriminated against, but you’re not discriminated against as much. Any less discrimination and you’d practically be full-fledged citizens worthy of respect and protection under the law.” And that’ll happen as soon as monkeys fly out of Boehner’s (totally not gay) butt. If only gays and lesbians were “politically powerless.” Ah, to go back to the pre-Stonewall days. Actually, Boehner and his boys are right. If it weren’t for Stonewall and the brave gays and lesbians of that era there probably wouldn’t be a DOMA at all. DOMA was, after all, a reaction to the growing visibility and political savvy of homos. And once homos stopped letting themselves to be loaded into police vans and started fighting back, it was hard to argue that they were weak and pathetic. The strength of gays and lesbians has only grown. No wonder Boehner’s afraid.
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HANSEN that swept the globe when the Apollo 11 lunar module landed on the moon. This was a moment of pride for the entire nation (even the world). Over the next few years, NASA would continue to send more missions to the moon, and we would continue to learn more about our own world, elements, and reactive properties. NASA success would continue through the next few decades with the Space Shuttle. Many students, engineers, scientists and writers would be inspired by this move towards space exploration as what appeared to be a national effort. Of the third benefit managed by private firms, this would highly depend upon the company or companies that build space technology. We know that some companies are more interested in building technology and not so good with marketing the technology. We also know that some firms are willing to sacrifice quality in order to achieve cost-effective methods. Each of these can be a benefit to space exploration goals, but will this excite the crowds of people into engineering or writing like Apollo did? If the effort becomes a company effort rather than a national one, would the awe-inspiring effort towards the moon have been relegated to a commercial scene instead of a national effort? If we are to get back to the moon and beyond, we have to have a focused effort similar to Apollo that uses a national goal to drive commercial development. This will do more to stimulate the economy than bailing out banks. This will also reinvigorate national spirit and inspire millions to create and to invent. The possibilities are limitless.
“Of all the work that I do, I find I am most ‘myself’ in the work that I do with the gay men’s chorus.” -Dr Rebecca Gruber, etc
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Wired That Way: This story brought to you by...the internet by Rachel Eliason This month’s column has three unreThis August at the Indiana State Fair, lated stories, but one point. high winds caused a stage lighting array to On July 22nd 2011, Norwegian Anders collapse on the crowd killing five people. Behring Breivik dressed in a police uniform Again there was around-the-clock news and entered a youth camp on the island of coverage from every major network. For Utoya. Armed with automatic weapons, survivor Alisha Brennan the real tragedy Anders went on a shooting spree that killed was just beginning. Her partner Christiana more than seventy people. Santiago, a well respected lesbian activist, On a nearby island a lesbian couple— was dead. Hege Dalen and Toril Hansen—heard the Two days later, four bodies would gunshots and screaming, so they got into be gone from the coroner’s office. Only a boat and went to investigate. They found Christina’s body remained, held up by red terrified youth rushing into the lake in an tape while Indiana struggled with how to attempt to flee the gunman. They helped deal with next-of-kin laws in a state where as many youth into their boat as they could same sex partners have no legal rights. and escorted them to safety, only to return Even now the drama continues to unfold for more time and again. They rescued as Indiana prosecutors struggle with the over forty teens. Though neither of the question of whether Alisha can be part of women were hurt, their boat had three the wrongful death lawsuit as Christina’s bullet holes in its side before all was said next of kin or not. and done. Once again, media As remarkable Now we have a new weapon, pundits are quick to as the two women’s one that stands equal to dismiss any claim of story is, the fact that discrimination. The it very nearly went power of those who would coroner had not, it unreported, despite erase us. It’s the Internet. turns out, refused to around-the-clock release Christina’s body news coverage of the attack. A Finnish because he didn’t want to recognize same paper first ran a short story about the sex marriage. He had merely informed women’s heroism over a week after the the wrong next of kin (Christina’s aunt, fact. The blogging site “Talk About Equal- her nearest biological kin.) Yet, would ity” translated the story and suggested that have happened to a straight couple? that the lack of coverage was an act of Would the coroner have ‘overlooked’ a discrimination by the press. Huffington male fiancé? Post took up the story and it has, in LGBT Here in Iowa, in Waterloo on Friday circles anyway, gone viral. August 19th, a young man was beaten so Norwegian media pundits are quick badly that he had to be rushed to University to dismiss claims of homophobia, arguing of Iowa Hospital in Iowa City. Marcellus that the unassuming couple did not speak Andrews died that weekend from the out—nor wished to speak out—about their injuries he sustained in the beating. experience. (Which begs the question, how The initial report, posted that day on did the Finnish media get the story in the the Waterloo Couriers website, was sparse. first place?) Why did the mainstream press He had been beaten. He suffered a head miss this story? Perhaps lesbian women injury. By Monday a new report was out. don’t look as heroic as straight men? Eyewitnesses were saying that the beating
had began with taunting. Slurs had been used. As the week went on police were cautiously adding a new word: they were, it turns out, ‘homophobic’ slurs. Meanwhile the Internet was going crazy. Friends of Marcellus were talking. Marcellus was planning on going to college for interior design and he was being teased for it. Kids were calling him names, names that had also preceded the beating. They were words like fag, faggot, and homo. Marcellus’s death had been a hate crime. The police still refuse to treat it as a hate crime. The beating had not been motivated by Marcellus’s real or perceived sexuality. Family claims he was not gay. The words that preceded the killing were incidental to what happened. This is how we are erased. Acts of heroism are ignored because we don’t fit the stereotype of a hero. Institutionalized discrimination is turned into a simple bureaucratic snafu. Derogatory verbal assaults are described euphemistically as “homophobic slurs”. Our stories are ignored, and when we can’t be ignored our sexuality and gender are downplayed, made into incidental items. November 20th is the Transgender Day of Remembrance, and if anyone knows how this works it’s trans people. Brutal execution-style killings of trangender women are routinely summed up by police reports using phrases as sparse as “man in dress found dead”. Our lives and our stories are routinely reduced to this. Once upon a time that was it. History is filled with LGBT people historians tell us. But only a handful of exceptional individuals have escaped the systematic erasure. Statistics tells us that anywhere from 3 to 10% of the population is LGBT. Yet whole decades of history yield only one or two examples of LGBT people. The rest are gone, hidden by euphemism and a stoic
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ESTEFAN can be jailed at a moment’s notice, so they were very, very rough. Do you think it’s harder for a Latino artist, Ricky Martin for instance, to be gay and out? I think it’s harder for anyone, to be honest. Even though fortunately we are definitely moving forward—you see all these states where it’s becoming legal to marry your same-sex partner, as it should be everywhere—and we’re heading in the right direction. But you have to realize that even the Equal Rights Amendment only happened in 1972 (Editor’s note: It was never ratified), so we’re still trying to grow rights for everyone. I think it’s still tough because there’s still judgmental people, there’s still racism, there’s still homophobia. It’s a human condition. So as we become more and more educated and people become more open, it’s going to go in a positive direction. So you’re a gay marriage supporter? Of course I am. I think everyone should be able to marry who they love, and it just should be. Do you think you would’ve had that mentality years ago, considering you
refusal to print or talk about such things. Now we have a new weapon, one that stands equal to power of those who would erase us. It’s the Internet. In a recent column (“Lez Get Real, Shall We?” July 11) I criticized bloggers for lacking creditability. And yet blogging, social media sites like Facebook, and Twitter also play an enormous beneficial role for the LGBT community too. They are our best defense against erasure. Stories about LGBT people frequently get missed by the mainstream press, and whether its conscious bigotry or something less sinister really doesn’t matter. A few people, however, know. They know that lesbians can be heroes, that bureaucrats don’t respect our rights, and that taunting and violence directed against us is still too common. Those few have a means of communicating, through the Internet. They can now reach out to others and tell their story. A few stories will fail under journalistic scrutiny, but if even one act of erasure is prevented, it will be worth it. grew up in a very Catholic-conservative home? I did, and I don’t know if my mom—I think nowadays she would, because my mom has grown a lot, but my mom was also raised in a very restrictive atmosphere in Cuba. She has a lot of hardcore ideas. I’ve never talked to her about this, but she’s very supportive of all her gay friends, and sometimes I go into her house and I tell her it’s like La Cage Aux Folles—all her best friends are gay guys! (Laughs) They’re over there always taking care of her and being really sweet with her. We’re very nurturing. Hey, listen, the best son a mom could have is a gay son. They’re not going to leave you high and dry, and they always watch their mothers and take care of them very much. Does that mean you’re going to have more kids until you get a gay one? Me?! I can’t! Are you kidding me? I would love a grandkid. Listen, the president of my corporation is gay and I see how he is with his mom, and I have a lot of friends who are just fantastic sons. Very nice to speak with you, Gloria. Thank you so much. A pleasure as well. Tell all my gay fans I love them.
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The Gay Wedding Planner: A Transgender Couple’s Wedding by Beau Fodor As I wrap-up my third wedding “season”…I feel the need to talk about and share my thoughts about the “T” in LGBT… especially when it comes to weddings and all the “issues” now. These issues are at the root of all transgender advocacy. Many of them reflect the current state of the legal system in America. In working to overturn this legislation, groups like NTAC are committed to not only bettering the lives of gender variant people through less discrimination—they are also focused on changing the status quo of tolerance and acceptance in society as a whole.
Relationship Recognition
Many people don’t understand what the big deal is with relationship and marriage recognition. Isn’t marriage just a piece of paper anyway? Not so. In America, married couples enjoy many rights and benefits that same-sex couples do not have access to, under the current law. Here are some of the benefits that same-sex couples miss out on: (taskforce.org) • Right to inheritance of a spouse’s property • Joint adoption • Property tax and income tax deductions • Disability payments • Next-of-kin status for emergency medical situations • Shared property, child support, and alimony (after divorce) • Social security payment and veteran’s pensions, for widowed spouses And that is only a partial list. You can see that, besides less than equal recognition in the eyes of society, limited relationship recognition by the state also robs gay transgender people of many legal benefits. Unbelievably, many states don’t have laws banning sexual discrimination in everyday life. Just as African-Americans were once discriminated against based on
race, many transgender people find it hard to go about their daily lives, due to lack of legal protection. This discrimination doesn’t only manifest in small ways, like worse service at a local restaurant or a tougher time getting hired. Surveys have showed that it massively impacts the quality of life for gender variant people (taskforce.org). • More than a quarter of transgender people report losing a job because of their gender identity. • Harassment and mistreatment on the job because of being transgender is a nearuniversal occurrence—97% of transgender people report experiencing it. • Transgender people are twice as likely to be living below the poverty line. • Nearly 1/5 have lost their housing due to being transgender. • 19% report being denied medical care because of their gender identity. • Harassment in medical settings has occurred to 28% of transgender people. • A Transgender person is MURDERED or killed in the U.S. every three (3) days. As you can see, sexual discrimination shows up in all sorts of institutions, from healthcare to employment. For many transgender people, simply going about normal daily life can become stressful and needlessly difficult, because of the discrimination they face. And, in most states, gender variant people have no recourse through the law for dealing with this discrimination. Only thirteen states have banned discrimination based on gender orientation. Most of this legislation has happened in the past ten years, which is hopeful. But, there is still a very long way to go. We have made huge progress here in Iowa. The Trans couples I have worked with and for, want the same thing as all couples…The Happily-Ever-After. My most recent Transgendered couples nuptials were unique and extremely heartfelt; here’s a peek into the ceremony:
The officiant read the non-gendered, very consent-orientated ceremony out of a copy of Darwin’s Origin of Species. She also did the entire speech from The Princess Bride. The vows included a traditional Celtic prayer which honored their Latino-Irish heritage: You cannot possess me for I belong to myself. But while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give. You cannot command me, for I am a free person. But I shall serve you in those ways you require, And the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand. …I pledge to you that yours will be the name I cry aloud in the night, And the eyes into which I smile in the morning. I pledge to you the first bite of my meat and the first drink from my cup. I pledge to you my living and my dying, each equally in your care.
Beau Fodor is an Iowa wedding planner who focuses specifically on weddings for the LGBT community. He is working with Pilgrim Films on a new Iowabased reality show. Beau can be reached through iowasgayweddingplanner.com or gayweddingswithpanache.com. I shall be a shield for your back and you for mine. I shall not slander you, nor you me. I shall honor you above all others, and when we quarrel we shall do so in Private and tell no strangers our grievances. This is my wedding vow to you This is the marriage of equals.
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TOMLIN characters will again take to the stage to entertain and interact with the the audience on topics both timeless and timely. You’re coming to Des Moines on November 18. You’ve performed in Iowa before? Oh, god, yeah! I’ve performed there a couple of times, but not anytime recently. It’s been quite a while I think. I have some friends who used to live in Des Moines— now they live in Minneapolis—but that was another reason to visit Des Moines. Tell us about the show you’re doing. Will your fans recognize the characters or is this a completely new performance? They’ll recognize characters, but there will be stuff they don’t know coming out of the characters’ mouths. There’s lots of other stuff. I’ll try to talk about Des Moines [laughs]. (I always laugh when some, you know, interloper comes from outside to talk about your town.) And I use multimedia, playing some clips satyrically, make fun of myself, make fun of the characters’ lives. And you interact with the audience? Oh, yeah, sure. Very informal. And if the house wants me to I do a Q&A at the end. Do you have a favorite character that you play, either in your show or otherwise? No. You know, I’m so lucky just to have a bunch of different characters who people can relate to if you talk about different issues in their voice. An actress envies anyone who has a vehicle where they can play a bunch of
the fun guide characters in one evening. I even had Helen Hayes say to me that she hadn’t envied an actress in years, and she went to see “The Search” years ago in the 80s on Broadway. I know she didn’t mean she envied me personally, she envied the notion that I could play twelve characters in one evening, and have them interact and interrelate. It’s a fun thing to do as an actor. What’s your favorite medium for performing? I still prefer stage. The short story of it is if I could only do one thing, that’s what I would do. But luckily I don’t have to do just one thing. I’ve had a crack at a lot of stuff and I’ve had a very long career. It was quite a leap to go from “Laugh In” and doing something like Ernestine, who was so hugely popular, and even Edith Ann--you know, people don’t necessarily translate that into doing dramatic roles or any other kind of roles. It’s very difficult not to get pigeon-holed. I was lucky in the sense that the first movie I did was “Nashville” with Bob Altman. He’s one of the very few kinds of people who would cast me out of the box like that. Ernestine, even though many people today might be unfamiliar with the role of a telephone operator, her attitude as the representative of a big company is very timely for right now, with politics and Occupy Wall Street...
She’s very useful, you know, you’re completely right! Ernestine now lately has been working for a healthcare insurance company, denying health care to everybody. She can go anywhere. During the Bush administration she had a webcast chat show called “Ernestine Calls You On It, and You’d Better Have an Answer!” She would call Bush, or Rumsfeld, or Cheney, or get them all on a conference call [laughs], and and ask them and grill them about stuff.
She could grill the current batch of republican presidential candidates! Yeah, she should call a few of those up! Back on the topic of your “long career,” is there anything you can think of that you have not done, that you would want to? You know, in some form or other I’ve done so much, you know, even producing little tiny films, I’ve done that too. I’ve never done [produced] a full out movie, but we were always doing guerilla theatre, guerilla filming. I would film stuff that happened, even way back in the seventies we were doing video in my shows, even when it was just black and white reel-to-reel. We traveled with a video crew, live camera, and take stuff in the town, and if we were performing at a college, we’d try to get one of the professors to tape a little thing with us where Ernestine would be hidden behind the back of a couch,
I could play twelve characters in one evening, and have them interact and interrelate. It’s a fun thing to do as an actor.
NOVEMBER 2011 supposedly making out with somebody, and the professor or somebody who was well known on the campus would stick their head up from the back of the couch. We were forever doing stuff like that. Do you have anything coming up or coming out that we should be looking forward to? Yeah, I did a couple of episodes of “Eastbound and Down”, which is on HBO, but it won’t be on until about January. The lead actor is Danny McBride, and his character is just really interesting. I also played Lisa Kudrow’s mother on “Web Therapy”. There were ten episodes, I was probably in five or six, but we’ve already shot another round of that. That’s mostly improv’d, and it’s really funny. I mean I love it; I’m a fan of Lisa’s anyway. So I played her mother. My name was Putsy Hodge, I was very upper crust Bostonian. I don’t have any movies “in the can,” though I have a couple of movies that I might do very soon. On a completely different note, happy anniversary this year, forty years! Oh, Jane [Wagner] and me? Thank you! We are proud of it; we’re committed to it, to those years and that relationship. Any advice to people who aspire to have such a long relationship? Well, yeah, you just have to be pretty flexible, and respectful, and have the attitude that nothing’s too important--that is, don’t take anything too seriously. You know, just be there for each other.
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Full of Surprises
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BLACKHAWK
Quite amazingly, the hotel boasts its own bowling alley in the basement level: the Blackhawk Bowl and Martini Lounge. An original part of the 1915 hotel, the bowling alley had been converted to meeting space, but was re-established by the new owners in the 2010 renovation. It includes six main lanes, two VIP lanes, a fully-stocked (and competently staffed) bar, and a menu that puts traditional “bowling alley food” to shame. The menu here includes appetizers, burgers, pizzas, sandwiches, and wraps—topped by a long list of creative martinis—and gives a nod to its bowling alley inspiration with such items as the “pretzel’d chicken” appetizer and numerous bowling references in the descriptions. Flat-screen TVs add a comfortable “sports bar” feel while the funky, stylish décor amps up the class. The space is available for private parties, and the rental fees include bowling shoes for the participants. The lounge offers a daily special of lunch and a game of bowling for $12.95. Also on the basement level, the hotel’s amenities include a workout room, complete with not only aerobic equipment but also a substantial set of free weights. The workout room includes complimentary towels and water for guests.
Originally built in 1915, the turn of the 21st century found the Hotel Blackhawk in terrible disrepair, but a threeyear renovation costing more than $35 million has catapulted the hotel back to the top. The hotel reopened its doors in December 2010.
Summit Hotels
The Hotel Blackhawk has a rare double designation with the prestigious Preferred Hotel Group (PreferredHotelGroup.com), being both a “Summit Hotel and Resort” (SummitHotels.com) and one of the “Historic Hotels of America” (HistoricHotels.org). The hotel is actively working to increase its rating from “Summit” to “Preferred”—which would put it on par with properties such as the Elysian Hotel and the Trump Hotel and Towers in Chicago. Currently, Iowa boasts only two “Summit” hotels, The Hotel Blackhawk, in Davenport and The Hotel at Kirkwood Center, in Cedar Rapids. (On the other side of Iowa, just outside Iowa in Omaha, Nebraska, is the “Preferred Botique” level hotel, the Hotel Deco.)
LGBT Friendly
Hotel Blackhawk is the only TAGapproved (TAGapproved.com) hotel in Iowa. (TAG stands for “Travel Alternatives Group” and was created in 1997 “to help accommodations effectively reach and sensitively serve the LGBT community.”) Further, Hotel Blackhawk is one of only two properties in the entire state listed with the International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association or “IGLTA” (IGLTA.org). (The only other IGLTA property in Iowa is Harrah’s & Horseshoe Council Bluffs Casino & Hotel in Council Bluffs). Hotel Blackhawk even proudly lists both its IGLTA and TAG approvals on its wedding site, DavenportDreamWeddings.com. The Hotel’s General Director, Tim Heim, explains: “When we first reopened, we wanted to do something very embracing, to embody a very welcoming facility. I had been involved in the International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association in the 90s when I worked in downtown Chicago. Even before it was ‘popular’ I was doing sales toward that segment. People don’t realize
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Perfect for Events
The historic main lobby at Hotel Blackhawk that when you get [an IGLTA designation], it opens you up to a totally different market, because there are different travel agents out there who strictly do gay and lesbian travel. There are also companies and associations and conventions as well, such as the Lesbian & Gay Lawyers Association. We wanted to embrace that, and to get involved, and to let people know that we support the [LGBT] community. “And with that, we actually went a step further and became a TAG approved hotel. The TAG status gives us a certain designation where all of our staff is fully trained to know how to deal with diverse situations, so to our staff nothing’s going to be ‘out of the normal’ to them.”
A Destination
The historic Gold Room at Hotel Blackhawk
The Hotel Blackhawk is ideally located in downtown Davenport, connected directly to the River Center and the Adler Theatre, and further connected via skywalk to covered parking and numerous other local businesses and entertainment venues. But guests will hardly have any
reason to leave the building. Dining within the hotel includes two restaurants, the upscale Bix Bistro & Lounge, and the Bowling Alley Café. There is also a coffee shop (delightfully named “Beignet Done That”) which includes a full line of Starbucks products along with sandwiches, pastries, and the beignets that give the shop its name. Whether traveling for pleasure or for business, the hotel includes a full range of amenities to cover a guest’s needs. “Everything here is state of the art with the highest amenities,” says Tim Heim, as he gives a tour of a beautifully appointed suite. It is obvious that he is not exaggerating. Rooms come with both wireless and hardwired Internet access, and WiFi access is complimentary. Every room has an LCD TV built into the bathroom mirror, an iPod docking station for the alarm clock, and a complimentary laptop safe. Reviewing the details of the rooms’ furnishings and accessories, it is clear why Hotel Blackhawk has received its status as a “Summit Hotel” with the Preferred Hotel Group. As part of the renovation, a parking garage adjacent to the hotel was torn down and replaced with an indoor pool area. The pool is available to guests 24 hours a day via secure keycard access, and includes a Jacuzzi tub and an outdoor sitting area. The pool is positioned above the hotel’s new lobby—which may be “cool and contemporary”, but still manages to also be very warm and welcoming. This lobby is where most guests will receive their first impression of the hotel’s remarkable hospitality, welcomed formally by either a valet or a doorman.
Hotel Blackhawk is home to more than 10,000 square feet of meeting space with full audio-visual capability. Many rooms are professionally appointed and decorated, but the hotel’s remarkable Gold Room has been restored in its historical detail, a significant $3.8 million part of the overall restoration. This beautiful room is ideal for wedding receptions with space for 220 guests, and can be opened to an adjacent room to accommodate a total of 320 guests. If for some reason even all this space is not enough, the River Center—accessible directly from the hotel’s beautiful main lobby—has a combined meeting space of 100,000 square feet.
A Lasting Impression
So regardless of the reason for the trip—whether an Iowa wedding, a business seminar, or just a relaxing vacation any time of year—the Hotel Blackhawk in Davenport, Iowa is truly a choice destination.
Rooms at the Hotel Blackhawk are appointed with every amenity
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OMG, a night w/ the Cast of “LA CAGE AUX FOLLES” by Beau Fodor I should start off with mentioning this was one of the best revivals I’ve ever seen. It was absolutely FABULOUS. From the minute I got my Playbill, I was SO excited. I have wanted to see the show since “LA CAGE” started it’s run at the Menier Chocolate Factory theater in south-central London where the current revival of the show opened in 2008. But…the CAST PARTY, at SPLASH Seafood & Oyster Bar, after the show, was SPECTACULAR. Wow, from the pink-hued ambiance of Splash Restaurant, filled with flora, to the beautiful finger foods , moroccan salads, charcuterie, lobster, to-die-for chocolate dessert (oh, and I should mention “Open Bar”…). A live six-piece band played till midnight and then awesome dance mixes had the floor PACKED with cast members till 2 a.m.!!! Des Moines sparkled and dazzled once again, and the entire cast had only compliments for our Capitol City. I was afforded the luxury of visiting with George Hamilton, star of the show, along with Cynthia Fodor, News anchor at KCCI, CBS/Channel 8, in Des Moines. He was SO charming and charismatic.
(We actually spoke for 15 minutes JUST about tanning, SPF, and skin care…LOL! Then we spent 10 minutes talking about “aging gracefully”. He also mentioned that 70 was the new 40; just sayin’…) He spoke VERY highly of his cast mates, his Iowa experiences, and his Producer, Barry Weissler. The producer of “La Cage Aux Folles,” which opened it’s national tour in Des Moines on Tuesday, is one of the nation’s most successful Broadway producers, with a certified blockbuster—the 1996 revival of “Chicago,” which is still on Broadway—and a cabinet full of Tony Awards. At Weissler’s direction, the cast and crew of “La Cage” spent the past two weeks in Des Moines fine-tuning his new road show version starring George Hamilton, before launching a 56-week, 40- major cities tour. It all ended after the Sunday evening show. That’s when five semitrailer trucks backed up to the Civic Center dock, loaded up and drove through the night to Minneapolis, where they unloaded and set up Monday for the next six-day run.
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HEAR ME OUT Lady Antebellum wants to Own the Night, perhaps they should start with an hour.
Björk, Biophilia
Breaking down Björk isn’t easy. The Icelandic dancer in the dark’s unpredictable output, ever since 1993’s electro-pop Debut, has been high-concept art that’s challenged and provoked, concerned more with experimenting thanstraightforwardmelodiesandgotchahooks. The gradual pull of Björk’s warped style takes hold once again on the progressively tinkered, iPad-made Biophilia, her first playground of sound in four years. As fantastical as 2007’s Volta, though not nearly as sonically bipolar or off-putting,Biophiliaisanotherout-thereoeuvre, further establishing Björk as a shot of cheap vodka. This one, though, goes down easier. She whispers in with her otherworldly voice gliding over gentle strings on “Moon,” a simple-sounding starter that’s perfectly suited to set the scene of dream-like whimsicality. Because then there’s the dark, ever-morphing, organ-strutted stunner “Thunderbolt”; the comforting ting-ting on the anthemic“Crystalline,”whichbuildstoathrillingly spastic end as abruptly as a nightmare; and then “Cosmogony,” easily the most gorgeous song on the album (“Virus” is nearly as breathtaking). It’s almost empty as it fills up with Björk’s angelic intones about, of all things, the Big Bang Theory. But that beauty fades on “Hollow,” a churchy theaterpiecethat’sunsettlingandprobablysuited foraHumanCentipedemusical.Soyes,there’sthe usual imaginative weirdness about Biophilia— “Dark Matter” is exactly that—but there’s also an accessibly that’s not been part of Björk’s recent work. That she can say so much with so little this time—when things go oh so quiet, the silence still speaks—is a testament to her evolving, and often misunderstood, talent. Grade: B+
Indigo Girls, Beauty Queen Sister
NOVEMBER 2011 Three albums in two years and a constant touring schedule, it’s almost impossible to keep up with the Indigo Girls. After last year’s Staring Down the Brilliant Dream and Holly Happy Days, their first holiday-themed LP, the gay-revered duo of Amy Ray and Emily Saliers do their thing on this 13-song set of reliable storytelling. But as they’ve come to show during the three-decade trajectory of their longstanding run, some reinvention is necessary to keep the magic coming. It ebbs and flows on Beauty Queen Sister, which is, considering their seemingly bottomless breadth of material, a pretty decent album in their career canon. Overarching themes like love, loss and the world—the give and take—surface once again, but this is one of their most outward-looking albums, telling stories of good-ol’-days nostalgia (“Feed and Water the Horses”) and a thoughtful rumination on the Egyptian revolution (“War Rugs”). It’s not their most melodic or accomplished work (though they still nail those harmonies as they swap songs), and of the two other traditional studio albums released in just the last couple of years—so many CDs in so little time practically ask for comparisons—this latest one trails behind the rest. But it’s growth. And so, as Ray and Saliers continue to shift sonically and stay fresh despite being workaholics, growing pains are almost inevitable. The biggest? “Able to Sing,” a throwaway pop-rocker, and the dragging dud “Mariner Moonlighting.” But there’s also “Birthday Song” and stringsoaked “Yoke,” so good they nearly nullify any memory of the album’s mess-ups. Beauty Queen Sister is prolific in that it’s actually as good as it is—and with it, it’s obvious: Indigo Girls aren’t ready to give up their crown. Grade: B-
Also Out
LeAnn Rimes, Lady & Gentlemen Nasty affair. Eating disorder. Gay ex-hubby. Before becoming a tabloid target, LeAnn Rimes made headlines for her precocious talent. Now she’s 29 and probably taking on more men than she ever has with her 13th album, a covers project of songs by country guy greats like Merle Haggard and Kris Kristofferson. Ballads still suit her best, especially her delicately nuanced “Help Me Make It Through the Night” and “When I Call Your Name,” taking Vince Gill’s track into soulful territory. An original, “Give,” is conventional but noble, though she still does more with it vocally than her contemporaries could. Years later, Rimes is still one of the best talents in the business. Now that’s something to talk about. Ryan Adams, Ashes & Fire Many of Ryan Adams’ best songs are melancholy. But an album full of them? That’s just overkill. On his latest hit-or-miss disc, a return to the fab songwriter’s alt-country roots, only a few songs stick around after the music stops, especially lead single, “Lucky Now,” a lovely nostalgic number. Same goes for the tenderhearted “I Love You But I Don’t Know What to Say”—his voice so quiet it’s like he’s only singing to you. Lots of them could melt a stone, but they muddle together because of their stripped simpleness. His voice, which helps things along, just isn’t enough to change up the monotony. Cohesion, as it ends up, is the LP’s best and worst enemy—the songs sound just fine together, but they don’t stand well on their own. Reach Chris Azzopardi at chris@pridesource.com.
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Out of Town: Winter Adventures by Andrew Collins Vail and Beaver Creek
Colorado’s most famous gay ski weeks are held in Aspen and Telluride, in midJanuary and late February respectively, but over the past few years, Vail Gay Ski Week (vailgayskiweek.com) has begun drawing serious crowds. The gathering takes place in late March and includes the usual mix of fun on the slopes and hobnobbing back around the fireplaces and hot tubs. In winter, skiing and snowboarding may be the region’s big draws, but it would be unfair to describe Vail (visitvailvalley.com) and nearby Beaver Creek (beavercreek.com) as mere ski towns. These scenic communities in the heart of the Colorado Rockies offer plenty of diversions. Another misconception about Vail (vail.com) is that it’s a crowded, freewayside ski park. True, the resort’s Front Side can get busy on weekends and does overlook Vail’s bustling villages and I-70, and this facility is one of the largest in North America, with some 5,300 skiable acres and nearly 200 runs. But there are many places on Vail Mountain to escape from the crowds, and skiers of all abilities will find challenging, varied terrain. For more solitude, ascend to the upper slopes of Vail’s Front Side to access the fabled Back Bowls, a glorious—and vast— swath of less-trammeled runs that descend down the back of the mountain. From there, additional lifts carry those seeking truly secluded terrain into Blue Sky Basin, a stunning patch of wilderness developed by the resort in 2000. In reality, from the majority of Vail’s ski runs, you can’t see a single mile of freeway or village infrastructure. Just avoid the Front Side, which is possible as long as you’re comfortable with intermediate terrain. If you’re planning to ski at more than a couple of the seven facilities owned by Vail Resorts (Vail, Beaver Creek, Breckenridge, Keystone, and Arapahoe Basin in Colorado, and Heavenly and Northstar in Lake Tahoe, California), consider buying an Epic Pass (snow.com/epic-pass.aspx), which offers great deals whether you’re skiing for a week or a full season. Standard lift tickets for Vail are also good at nearby Beaver Creek. Vail was developed as a planned resort community in 1962, designed with a nod toward the quaint chalet-inspired architecture of the Alps. Dozens of resorts, condos, shops, and restaurants have sprung up over the years, the earlier ones retaining the vintage, occasionally kitschy, aesthetic of Bavaria or Tyrol. More recently, Vail has seen a surge in ultra-luxury condo and hotel development. Several notable newcomers—Four Seasons, Ritz-Carlton, and Arrabelle at Vail Square among them— have upped the town’s posh factor. You don’t need a car in Vail—the 10-mile paved, multi-use Gore Valley Trail wends through the village, and free buses run regularly among the key neighborhoods and connect with low-priced service throughout the entire valley. You can reach Vail by flying into Eagle County Airport (with direct flights to about a dozen cities),
which is 30 miles west, or flying to Denver and renting a car or taking a bus—Vail is a two-hour drive from Denver (allow another 45 minutes from DIA, and account for slow-going on weekends and during rough weather). Vail is a 20-minute drive (shuttle bus service is available) from its smaller, swankier cousin, Beaver Creek. The small but dapper town of Avon lies at the base of the Beaver Creek ski area and is home to several good restaurants as well as the superb Westin Riverfront Resort. It’s a short, winding drive up the hill to reach fashionable Beaver Creek Village, home to 1,800 acres of superb skiing and snowboarding. Chains like Hyatt and Sheraton have impressive hotels set at Beaver Creek’s main base village, which is also anchored by a large skating rink. Lifts and ski runs join Beaver Creek’s main area with Arrowhead and Bachelor Gulch mountains—the latter has runs that trickle down to a sumptuous Ritz-Carlon. Almost improbably, given its location down on the Eagle River, the Westin Riverfront is an actual ski-in, ski-out resort—a gondola carries guests to a lift at Lower Beaver Creek Mountain (or you can take free shuttle buses up the hill to Beaver Creek Village). Head 5 miles west of Avon, and you’ll find more upscale dining, lodging, and shopping in the town of Edwards. It bears repeating that these communities abound with the usual diversions you might associate with acclaimed winter resorts. You can snowshoe, cross-country ski, take snowmobile tours, or simply stroll among the dozens of high-end shops in each village. You’ll also find more than a dozen full-service spas among the area’s resorts. At the Westin Riverfront, Spa Anjali offers a memorable Himalayan-inspired Abhyanga massage treatment as well as a red clover and mountain honey body mask. Other spas of note include the plush RockResorts Spa at the Arrabelle at Vail Square, and the serene Spa at Four Seasons Vail. If you’re planning a visit outside the snow season, note that several festivals take place in the area from late spring through early autumn, including Taste of Vail in April, the Vail Valley Music Festival from June to August, and the Vail International Dance Festival in late July and early August. The area is also renowned for mountain biking, hiking, fly-fishing, golf, and horseback.
Vail was developed as a planned resort community in 1962, designed with a nod toward the quaint chaletinspired architecture of the Alps.
Dining and lodging
The dining scene in Vail and Beaver Creek has begun to earn serious acclaim in recent years. Many of the top specialoccasion restaurants are in resort hotels. In Vail, you don’t want to miss Flame at the Four Seasons (fourseasons.com/vail), which is renowned for its sterling service and artfully presented food. Montauk Seafood Grill (montaukseafoodgrill.com) in Lionshead is quite good, and Terra Bistro (vailmountainlodge.com/terra-bistro) at Vail Mountain Lodge can be counted on for exceptional and innovative Ameri-
Skiing the Back Bowls at Vail Mountain. Photo by Andrew Collins. Photo by Andrew Collins can fare. Atwater on Gore Creek at Vail Cascade (vailcascade.com/atwater) impresses diners with its reasonable prices and tasty updates on American comfort food, from seared wild salmon to Angus beef sliders. And Centre V (arrabelle.rockresorts.com/dining) at Arrabelle resort in Lionshead turns out excellent French bistro fare (including addictive truffle-parmesan frites and Moroccan chicken tagine) in a romantic but informal space. At the Westin Riverfront, the stylish but relaxed Restaurant Avondale (avondalerestaurant.com) is well worth visiting—celeb chef Richard Sandoval took over operations here in fall 2011, giving the food the same creative Pan Latin spin he’s made famous at his Denver restaurants. Up at Beaver Creek Village, there are few more romantic places to dine than Grouse Mountain Grill (grousemountaingrill.com), whose commitment to local ingredients is evident in such dishes as pan-seared Colorado striped bass over lentil ragout. And in the village of Edwards, the smart but casual Juniper Restaurant (juniperrestaurant.com) has a splendid wine list and specializes in creative American and Continental fare. More casual options include Blue Moose Pizza (bluemoosepizza.com) in Lionshead Village, and and Rimini Gelato (riminigelato.com), with locations in Vail and Beaver Creek, a fine choice for sweets or a cup of hot cocoa. There are no gay bars in the Rockies, but the dozens of convivial nightspots in these parts are consistently gay-friendly. In Vail, excellent options for enjoying regional ales and lagers from Colorado’s bounty of craft breweries include the Tap Room at Bridge Street and Garfinkel’s Bar and Grill. A best bet among dance clubs is Samana Lounge, but Vail is more about listening to live music than dancing to DJs. In Beaver Creek Village, head to the hip Osprey Lounge for tapas and artful cocktails, or check out the scenes at Vin 48 wine bar and Loaded Joe’s Coffeehouse and Lounge, both down in Avon village. Vail and Beaver Creek are home to some of the finest resorts in Rockies. Venerable long-time favorites include the centrally located and beautifully designed
Lodge at Vail (lodgeatvail.rockresorts.com), with its excellent spa, hot tubs, pool, and warmly furnished rooms, including suites of up to three bedrooms. It’s the flagship of the venerable RockResorts brand, which also operates the sumptuous Arrabelle at Vail Square (arrabelle.rockresorts.com) in Lionshead Village. The Four Seasons Vail (fourseasons.com/vail) has been wowing visitors since it opened in late 2010. It’s a fairly intimate member of the illustrious brand, with just 121 rooms and the personal, top-notch service Four Seasons is famous for. Up in Beaver Creek, you’ll find two more excellent RockResorts properties, the hip and contemporary Osprey at Beaver Creek (ospreyatbeavercreek.rockresorts. com) and the more classically elegant Pines Lodge (pineslodge.rockresorts.com). The Ritz-Carlton at Bachelor Gulch (ritzcarlton.com) excels on service and has beautiful rooms within a many-gabled lodge-like building. And Avon’s Westin Riverfront (starwoodhotels.com) has huge, contemporary rooms with large windows, extensive kitchens in suites, and plenty of luxe perks—it’s LEED-certified and designed with a clean, modern, yet unquestionably cushy aesthetic. Down within walking distance of the many shops and restaurants in Edwards, the Inn at Riverwalk (innandsuitesatriverwalk.com) is a reasonably priced, upscale option, perfect if you don’t mind being a short drive or bus ride from the slopes. Vail’s Christiana Hotel (christiania.com/) is another midpriced option, and there’s also a perfectly comfortable, nicely updated Comfort Inn (comfortinn.com) in Avon. Finally, the area has a dizzying variety of condo rentals, which can be ideal for groups of friends traveling together. Rocky Mountain Vacation Rentals (rockymountainvacationrentals.com/) is the official go-to for condo rentals during Vail Gay Ski Week and is a great bet any time of year. Andrew Collins covers gay travel for the New York Times-owned website GayTravel.About.com and is the author of Fodor’s Gay Guide to the USA. He can be reached care of this publication or at OutofTown@qsyndicate.com.
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Book Worm Sez by Terri Schlichenmeyer “The Choosing” by Andrea Myers c.2011, Rutgers University Press $19.95 / $20.95 Canada 187 pages From the moment you entered the world, squalling and wet, your parents had many expectations for you. They expected you to grow up with morals, decency and kindness, strength and smarts. They hoped you’d be productive, happy, and live a long life. Dad might have dreamed you’d take over the family business. Mom might have wanted to teach you to ride a bike or a horse. They saw great promise in your future. When author Andrea Myers was born, her parents undoubtedly had certain
Across 1 It gets a gel hard 5 Suffix with Smurf 9 Jack on the card table 14 Major or minor, to Jerry Herman 15 Lo follower 16 Desi’s daughter 17 Got on one’s knees and asked for it 18 Fruit cover 19 Out-and-out 20 Series with an out gay guy named Max 23 With the waterworks on 24 Margaret Mead interviewees 28 Trick 29 New Deal org. 30 Colette, to herself 31 Smile self-consciously 34 MTV show with a gay lacrosse player 36 Tale opening 37 Before, in verse 38 Jabba the of “Star Wars” 39 Program set in Toronto with a transgender character 42 Is noisy in bed 44 Art, these days 45 Log Cabin member, for short 46 Carbon compound 47 Mississippi riverboat 49 Word-for-word 53 Comedy in which Lily has two dads 55 Kind of bear 58 Mapplethorpe’s Man in Polyester 59 May be seen now 60 Taper off 61 Triangle ratio 62 Give for a while 63 Still in the closet, perhaps
expectations for her, too. But, as you’ll see in her new book “The Choosing,” Myers had a few surprises for them. Born in Queens and raised in Long Island, Andrea Myers loved to ask questions as a child. No answer was ever thorough enough, and certain things were never discussed. Controversy was forbidden, topics of religion and sexuality among them. Myers’ mother was a Sicilian Catholic who had been “insulted” by the Church and, as a result, Myers and her siblings were raised in their father’s Lutheran faith. Theirs was a unique and boisterous family: Myers devout grandmother lived upstairs and fiercely loved her granddaughter;
Myers’ mother steadfastly stuck up for her children, no matter what; and Myers’ father had a dubious flair for fashion. With her inquisitive mind, there was no question about college but when it came time for Myers to apply, she felt as if there was little choice. Her boyfriend said that if she chose a local college, they might as well “talk marriage.” But what he didn’t know was that Myers had been dating girls, secretly, for several years. She chose Brandeis University and left home. There, she found people who didn’t care that she was gay, and a religion that seemed to answer a lot of endless questions but that asked even more. Seeking out a beloved campus Rabbi,
Q-PUZZLE: “Gay TV”
64 Estimating words 65 -highs (drag queen’s hosiery) Down
1 Theater opening for Greeks? 2 Word on a map of Israel 3 Highly skilled
Myers told him that she wanted to convert to Judaism and become a Rabbi. He didn’t follow tradition by turning her away three times; instead, he welcomed her, but warned her that it wouldn’t be easy. Undaunted, Myers embraced the challenge by moving to Jerusalem to study. In so many ways, it was a decision that changed her life. Filled with wisdom, humor, and the kind of contentment that only comes when one has found his or her right place in the world, “The Choosing” is one of those books that leaves you feeling oddly serene. Author Andrea Myers writes about her life: her quirky family, memorable childhood experiences, her wife and children, mentors and friends, but she also takes opportunity to educate readers on Talmudic teachings, Jewish laws, and her own spirituality. There’s plenty of humor in this book—you can almost hear the twinkle in Myers’ words—but at the same time, she imparts a sense of refreshment, subtly pointing out the miraculous in the everyday. If you’re looking for inspiration, direction, or a few gentle laughs, you’ll love this surprisingly charming book. Grab “The Choosing” and you can expect a very good read. 4 Ingredient for a Susan Feniger dish, perhaps 5 Hans Christian Andersen’s naked marcher 6 Itty-bitty 7 Was active in B&D 8 One no longer subject to DADT 9 Jack of The Odd Couple 10 Crackers or bananas 11 Dramatic division 12 Go head to head 13 Always, to Byron 21 Jodie Foster’s alma mater 22 Church section 25 Illicit love affair 26 Streisand’s Prince of Tides costar 27 Separates, as flour 31 Parts of floats 32 Not potent 33 Janis Joplin’s “Me and Bobby “ 34 More than bi35 Well-integrated Harvey? 37 Oral pleasure with a foamy head 40 With thick plates 41 Rank Billie Jean, e.g. 42 Brandy sipper’s glass 43 Bene beginning 46 Bad weather culprit 48 Place for a G-string 50 Out of bed 51 Dress with a flared bottom 52 Paul of Hollywood Squares 54 Screw royally 55 Butter portion 56 Tie for Madame Butterfly 57 On the _
• SOLUTION ON PAGE 28
NOVEMBER 2011
the fun guide
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HARPIST
INSURANCE
PHOTOGRAPHERS
IOWA NATIVE WILDFLOWERS
WINE & GIFT BASKETS
the fun guide
ACCESSline Page 28 SScontinued from page 15
EVENTS Street, Iowa City, IA 52245. All skill levels are welcome. American social dance, Latin, a mix of dance from the last 100 years. For more info, contact Mark McCusker at iowadancefest@ gmail.com, 319-621-8530 or Nora Garda at 319-400-4695, or visit http://iowadancefest. blogspot.com/. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Tuesday, ARGENTINE TANGO, 7:309:30 PM, Iowacity/Johnson Co Senior Center, 28 South Linn Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. Practice and open dance. A donation of $1-2 per person is requested for use of the Senior Center. For more info, contact Karen Jackson at 319-4471445 or e-mail kljedgewood@msn.com. [ L G BTMWA] Every Tuesday, KARAOKE IDOL, 9 PM, Studio 13, 13 South Linn Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. Drink specials and great competition! Visit www.sthirteen.com. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Tuesday, ACE HAS FACE THE MUSIC & DANCE, 7-9pm, 26 E Market St, Iowa City, IA 52245. All skill levels are welcome. Tango, Waltz, Disco, Country, American social dance, Latin, a mix from the last 100 years. Join on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/group. php?gid=372454708295. For more info, contact ACE experiment at 319-853-8223. [ L G B T MWA] First and Third Tuesday, YOUTH FOR EQUALITY, 4-6pm, The CENTER, 1300 W Locust St, Des Moines, IA 50309. A service and action group for youth who identify as LGBTQI and their allies. Open to all students in grades 5 through 12. [ L G B T M W A ] Second Tuesday of the Month, PITCH HIV+ PEER-TO-PEER SUPPORT GROUP, 6-8pm, The CENTER, 1300 Locust St, Des Moines, IA . Contact John at 515.284.3358 with questions. [+] Fourth Tuesday, LINCOLN NEBRASKA PFLAG, 7 PM, Unitarian Church, 6300 A Street, [LGBTMWA]
Wednesday
1st Wednesday of the Month, CEDAR RAPIDS CHARTER CHAPTER OF THE AMERICAN BUSINESS WOMEN’S ASSOCIATION, For more info, visit charter-chapter.tripod.com. [ LW] 1st Wednesday of the Month, WOMEN’S SACRED CIRCLE, 6:30-8 PM, Prairiewoods Franciscan Spirituality Center, 120 E. Boyson Rd, Hiawatha, IA 52233. This group is for women who are interested in gathering for spiritual growth. The direction and activities of the group are determined by participants. $5 per session. For more info, visit www.prairiewoods. org. [ L W ] 1st Wednesday of the Month, CONNECTIONS’ RAINBOW READING GROUP, 7 PM,
Iowa City Public Library Meeting Room B, 123 South Linn Street, Iowa City, IA 52240. For more info, contact Todd at: faunides@yahoo.com. [ L GBTMWA] 2nd Wednesday of the Month, STONEWALL DEMOCRATS, THE GLBT CAUCUS OF THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY, 6:30-8 PM, For more info, contact Harvey Ross at linnstonewall@gmail. com or call 319-389-0093. [ L G B T M W A ] 2nd Wednesday of the Month, WOMEN FOR PEACE KNITTERS, 7-9 PM, Hiawatha, IA . at Prairiewoods, 120 E. Boyson Rd., Hiawatha. Knitting, crocheting, and discussion. For more info, call 319-377-3252 or go to www. womenforpeace-iowa.org. All ages and levels of needlework skills welcome. Come knit for charities. [ L W ] 2nd Wednesday, OUT NETWORKING, 5:30, Des Moines Social Club, 1408 Locust St, Des Moines, IA 50309. A social, business, and philanthropic networking organization for anyone who is lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, questioning or supportive. The group presents year-round events focused on business, culture, community, and philanthropic subjects. [ L G BTA] Every Wednesday, HOT MESS EXPRESS, 8:00pm, Des Moines Social Club, 1408 Locust St., Des Moines, IA . The hottest most messiest citizens of Des Moines providing a comedic look at the hottest most messiest current events around the world. Featuring: Paul Selberg, Rachel C. Johnson, Kelley Robinson & Tyler Reedy [ L G B T A ] Every Wednesday, U OF I GAY LESBIAN BISEXUAL TRANSGENDER AND ALLIES UNION MEETINGS, 7-9 PM, Iowa City, IA . at the Penn State Room #337 of the Iowa Memorial Union, U. of Iowa campus, Iowa City. For more info, visit http://www.uiowa.edu/~glbtau/ or e-mail glbtau@uiowa.edu. These meetings are open to the public. [ L G B T M W A ] Every Wednesday, PRIDE BOWLING LEAGUE FOR GLBT & SUPPORTERS, 7 PM, Des Moines, IA at Air Lanes Bowling Center 4200 Fleur Drive. For more info, email pridebowlingleague@gmail.com or call 515-650-1725. [L G B T M W A] Every Wednesday, Lez Talk!, 8:30 p.m., Des Moines, IA. Capital City Talk Show hosted by lezzies and made for All people. [L G B T M W A] Every Wednesday, OMAHA FRONTRUNNERS/WALLKERS, 6:30 PM. For more information call 402-804-8720. [ L G B T M W A ] First and Third Wednesday of the Month, PITCH HIV+ PEER-TO-PEER SUPPORT GROUP, Friends and Children’s Council, 500 E 4th St, Ste 414, Waterloo, IA . RSVP to tamih@pitchiowa. org (requested but not required). (First meeting will be January 19, 2011 from 5:30-7:30pm at the CASS office, 2101 Kimball Ave, Ste 401, Waterloo.) [ + ]
Thursday
1st 3rd Thursday, EVENINGS FOR SPIRIT, 6:30-8:30 PM, West Branch, IA . at SpiritHill Retreat, 604 Cedar Valley Road, West Branch. First, third, and fifth Thursdays of each month. Women gather at SpiritHill (or other locations) to share our spiritual experiences, visions and longings. The evenings include time for sharing and time for silence. Laughter, tears and singing are often shared as well. No specific spiritual practice is followed. This event is always open to newcomers. For more info, call 319-643-2613, or e-mail spirit-hill@earthlink.net. Calling in advance is highly recommended to confirm the location for the specific month of interest. [LW] 2nd Thursday of the Month, OPEN MIC WITH MARY MCADAMS, 7-9 PM, Des Moines, IA . at Ritual Café, on 13th St. between Locust and Grand, downtown Des Moines. Visit www. ritualcafe.com. For more info, e-mail mary@ marymcadams.com. [ L G B T M W A ] 2nd Thursday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG OMAHA/COUNCIL BLUFFS CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM (6:30 PM social time), Omaha, IA . at Mead Hall, First United Methodist Church, 7020 Cass St., Omaha. For more info, call 402-291-6781. [ L G B T M W A K ] 3rd Thursday of the Month, OPEN MIC HOSTED BY KIMBERLI, 7-10 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . at the Blue Strawberry Coffee Company (now open after the flood), 118 2nd St. SE, Downtown Cedar Rapids. Signup at 6:30 p.m. or by e-mailing flyingmonkeyscr@aol.com the week prior to the open mic. [ L G B T M W A ] 3rd Thursday of the Month, LGBTQI YOUTH MOVIE NIGHT AT THE CENTER, 6:3010pm, The CENTER, 1300 Locust, Des Moines, IA . This is part of the LGBTQI youth program, anyone 24 years old and younger is welcome. Come down spend the evening with your friends and make some new ones. 515-243-0313 [ L GBT+] 3rd Thursday of the Month, IOWA PFLAG DUBUQUE/TRI-STATE CHAPTER MEETING, 7 PM, Dubuque, IA . at St. John’s Lutheran Church, 1276 White St., Dubuque. For more info, call 563-582-9388. [ L G B T M W A K ] 3rd Thursday of the Month, CONNECTIONS GAME NIGHT, 7-9 PM, Iowa City, IA . at Donnelly’s Pub, 110 E. College St., in downtown Iowa City. [ L G B T M W A ] 4th Thursday of the Month, PROFESSIONAL WOMEN’S NETWORK (PWN), For more info, visit www.pwn.org, e-mail pwn@pwn.org, or call Shelley Woods at 319-981-9887. [ L W ] Every Thursday and Friday, SHANNON JANSSEN, 6-10 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . Dawn’s Hide and Bead Away, 220 E. Washington St., Iowa City. Shannon performs a variety of music including original songs on the Grand Piano in the hotel’s beautiful atrium. No reservations required. [ L G B T M W A ] Last Thursday of the Month, DRAG KING SHOW, 9:00pm-2pm, Studio 13, 13 S. Linn St, Iowa City, IA 52240. The show starts EARLY at 9pm, so all you fans under 21 (meaning 19 & 20) can come for a jam packed hour of show! Your kings will also have another photo signing with awesome king swag! Plus, a SECOND mini show after the signing!!! $3 Bomb shots, $2 Calls and Domestics, and $1 Wells and shots! Cover is only $3! [ L G B T D ]
Friday
1st Friday of the Month, FAIRFIELD ART WALK, For more info, visit FairfieldArtWalk. com. [ L G B T M W A ] 1st Friday of the Month, GUERRILLA QUEER BAR MEETUP!, Tired of the same old bars? Crave the idea of bringing your queer and straight friends together in a fun, new environment? We’re descending upon an unsuspecting straight bar and turning it into a gay bar for the night. To join in: join our Facebook group, Google group or Twitter feed. You’ll receive an email the morning of each event with the name of a classically hetero bar and the meeting time. Call your friends, have them call their friends, show up at the bar and watch as it becomes the new “it” gay bar for one night only. Visit groups. google.com/group/iowa-city-guerrilla-queerbar. [ L G B T M W A ] 1st Friday of the Month, FIRST FRIDAY BREAKFAST CLUB, Sherman Place, 1501 Woodland Avenue, Des Moines, IA 95030. The First Friday Breakfast Club (FFBC) is an educational,
NOVEMBER 2011 non-profit corporation for gay men who gather on the first Friday of every month to provide mutual support, to be educated on community affairs, and to further educate community opinion leaders with more positive images of gay men. It is the largest breakfast club in the state of Iowa. Hoyt Sherman Place, 1501 Woodland Avenue, Des Moines, IA 95030. Contact Jonathan Wilson at (515) 288-2500 or email: info@ffbciowa.org [ G B ] 1st Friday of the Month, DAWN’S COFFEE HOUSE, 5-8 PM, Iowa City, IA . Dawn’s Hide and Bead Away, 220 E. Washington St., Iowa City. First Friday of every month between February 6 and December 4. Music and light snacks are provided. Proceeds from the door are split between the non-profit of the month and the store (to cover the cost of snacks). Any other donations received go 100% to the non-profit. $3 cover. For more info, phone 319-338-1566. [LGBTMWA] 2nd and 4th Friday, DRUMMING CIRCLE, 7 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . Unity Center of Cedar Rapids, 3791 Blairs Ferry Rd. NE, Cedar Rapids. Every 2nd and 4th Friday of the each month. For more info, call 319-431-7550. [ G M ] 3rd Friday of the Month, OLD-TIME DANCE FOR ALL, 8 PM, Iowa City, IA . A Barn Dance 12 miles east of Iowa City at Scattergood Friends School. A Barn Dance 12 miles east of Iowa City at Scattergood Friends School. Admission is $5.00 per person. Singles and couples, beginners and veterans welcome. The music is live, and all dances are taught and called (that is, prompted while the music is playing). Note: (1) same-sex couples are common at these dances, (2) they’re no-alcohol, no-smoking events, (3) every dance is taught, so beginners are welcome, and (4) people can attend alone or with a partner. People of a variety of ages show up, and the atmosphere is friendly and inclusive. For more info, phone 319-643-7600 or e-mail treadway@netins.net. [LGBTMWA]
Saturday
4th Saturday of the Month, LESBIAN BOOK CLUB, 7 PM, Davenport, IA . is reading books by or about lesbians. Non-lesbians are welcome to attend. All meetings are held at the Unitarian Universalist Church, 3707 Eastern Ave., Davenport. For more info, call 563-359-0816. [ L ] 4th Saturday of the Month, TANGOVIA, 7:30 PM, Iowa City, IA . join area tango dancers at the Wesley Center, 120 N. Dubuque St., Iowa City. Enjoy a candlelit evening of dance, hors d’oeuvres, and conversation in a relaxed atmosphere. Cost is $5. Partner not necessary. Beginners welcome to come at 7 p.m. for an introductory lesson. For more info, call Gail at 319-325-9630, e-mail irelandg@gmail.com, or visit www.tangovia.com. [ L G B T M W A D ] Every Saturday, WOMEN FOR PEACE IOWA, Noon to 1PM, Collins Rd NE & 1st Ave SE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52402. hosting Weekly Street Corner Vigils for peace, rain or shine. Meet at the corner of 1st Ave. and Collins Rd. SE (in front of Granite City Brewery), Cedar Rapids. Show your support for our troops by calling for their return from Iraq. For more info, e-mail khall479@aol. com. [ L G B T M W A K D ] Every Saturday, BAILE LATINO: SALSA, CHA-CHA, MERENGUE AND BACHATA LESSONS, 3:30 PM to 5:30 PM, Cedar Rapids, IA . taught by Gloria Zmolek, at CSPS, 1103 3rd St. SE, Cedar Rapids. No experience or partner necessary. All ages welcome. No sign-up required. $5 per person requested. For more info, contact Gloria at 319-365-9611 or visit www.crsalsa. org. [ L G B T M W A K D ]
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 3: Community
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First Friday Breakfast Club: OneIowa Public Forums Dr. Rebecca C. Gruber by Bruce Carr Our guest speaker on the first Friday of October 2011 was Dr. Rebecca C. Gruber, music director since 2006 of the Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus—and one of the very few straight women in the country to hold such a position. Dr. Gruber’s talk was both funny and serious, as she engaged us with her personal account of What I Didn’t Know About The Gays before the moment she stepped up onto the podium of the DMGMC: I Didn’t Know how startlingly diverse they are—that they don’t all dress right out of GQ., or all sing nothing but show tunes, or even that some of them Can’t Dance. I Didn’t Know that they came in so many different ages, and so many different levels of experience. I Didn’t Know that I would be expected to be naughty in a way that would get me fired from any other job! And in a more serious vein: I Didn’t Know how intensely committed they all are to social justice. I Didn’t Know that I would get to recognize their own personal relationships as deep and lasting (and how very big Iowa’s decision for Marriage Equality would turn out to be, since it pushed a lot of fencesitters—and especially some in our houses of worship—right off the fence). I Didn’t Know—although I certainly knew that my task was to help them find their musical and social voice—that it was they who would help me to find my social and professional voice. Of all the work that I do, I feel most like myself with the Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus. Fulfilling a prior promise that she would “bring samples” to illustrate her talk, the meeting concluded with Dr. Gruber conducting a sizable contingent of DMGMC members in a thrilling performance of their song “How Could Anyone Ever Tell You”. Even one of the most hardened veterans of our continuing struggle was heard to admit that he was surprised at how emotional it was to experience the power of the Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus. Rebecca Gruber is a graduate of Simpson College (B.M., Voice and Music Education, 1982), the Meadows School of the Arts at Southern Methodist University (M.M., Choral Conducting, 1989), the Perkins School of Theology, SMU (Master
It’s been six months since the Iowa Supreme Court issued their unanimous decision to allow same-sex couples the freedom to marry in the state of Iowa. But the struggle to protect marriage equality has only just begun. As we’ve seen in California and Maine, these freedoms are never as secure as we hope. The Iowa legislative session is set to begin in January, and a roster of anti-gay gubernatorial candidates is pledging to take away the freedoms we’ve worked so hard to achieve. One candidate even flaunts the idea of defying the Iowa Supreme Court ruling with an executive order, barring the door to committed couples who want to marry. At this critical juncture, One Iowa will host a series of public forums to continue our statewide conversation about marriage equality. These panel discussions around the state will represent various local perspectives: same-sex couples, parents of gays and lesbians, faith and community leaders, the legal community and local businesses.
Dr. Rebecca C. Gruber of Sacred Music, 1989), and the University of Nebraska at Lincoln (D.M.A. in Choral Conducting, 2008). [She received her doctoral hood from the hands of FFBC member Dr. Joseph Freund, DMGMC president, during the chorus’s 2008 Winter Solstice concert at the Temple for the Performing Arts in Des Moines.] She lives in Des Moines with her three children and can be contacted at conductor@ dmgmc.org. The Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus is dedicated to promoting harmony among all, while advancing a positive image of gay people through outstanding musicianship, creative programming, and community outreach. Originally known as the “Des Moines Men’s Chorus” (1985 to 1992), the Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus www. dmgmc.org reorganized in 2001, when it was guided by (FFBC member) Dr. Randal A. Buikema, who served as Artistic Director and Conductor until 2005. Not long after, the Chorus found new leadership when it hired Dr. Rebecca Gruber to serve as Artistic Director and Conductor. The DMGMC has an extensive history of performances and honors. Since 2001, the Chorus has given three or more concerts every year and has also performed at various events in a wide variety of venues in Des Moines and central Iowa.
Greater Omaha GLBT Network Calender The mission of GOglbt is to advance growth and equality for its members, businesses and allies by providing educational, networking and community-building opportunities. We typically meet the first Thursday every month at a traveling location to see the community and be seen. For more information or to be included on the e-newsletter list, please email us at info@goglbt.org. GoGLBT Monthly Meeting, Thursday, December 1st, 5:30 to 7 PM The Wimmins Show, Sunday, December 4th, 11:30 to 1:30 PM PFLAG Meeting, Thursday, December 8th, 6:30 to 9 PM Council Bluffs Community Alliance, Friday, December 9th, 5 PM The Wimmins Show, Sunday, Decem-
ber 11th, 11:30 to 1:30 PM The Wimmins Show, Sunday, December 18th, 11:30 to 1:30 PM Lesbian Book Club, Thursday, December 22nd, 7:30 to 9 PM Council Bluffs Community Alliance, Friday, December 9th, 5 PM The Wimmins Show, Sunday, December 25th, 11:30 to 1:30 PM
• Thursday, December 3rd, 6:30PM - 8:30PM. Waterloo Public Library, 415 Commercial St, Waterloo, IA • Monday, December 7th, 7:00PM - 9:00PM, Grinnell Campus, Grinnell, IA • Tuesday, December 8th, 7:00PM - 9:00PM, Campus of Northern Iowa Community College, Calmar, Iowa • Wednesday, December 9th, 6:30PM - 8:30PM, Central Middle School, 901 Cedar St, Muscatine, IA • Thursday, December 10th, 6:30PM - 8:30PM, All Cultures Equal Center, 1440 E 2nd St, Webster City, IA • Thursday, December 10th, 5:30PM - 7:30PM, Newton Public Library, 100 N 3rd Ave W, Newton, IA • Thursday, December 10th, 6:30PM - 8:30PM, West Burlington Community High School Auditorium, 408 W Van Weiss Blvd, West Burlington, IA • Monday, December 14th, 6:00PM - 8:00PM,Central Library, 1000 Grand Ave, Des Moines, IA • Thursday, December 17th, 7:00PM - 9:00PM, Scott Community College. Student Life Center Auditorium, Bettendorf, IA • Tuesday, January 5th, 6:30PM - 8:30PM, Mindframe Theater, 555 JFK Rd, Dubuque, IA
“The Big Gay Monolith : where is it? ... Our expression of ourselves is as wide as the world.” -Dr Rebecca Gruber, Oct 7, 2011, at the First Friday Breakfast Club
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Section 3: Community
NOVEMBER 2011
Iowa’s Own “family” owned Bisschopswijn warms the holidays 4. Pour the red wine evenly over the apples, then sprinkle in the Bisschopswijn – Mulled Wine & Cider Spices and butter into the casserole, distributing them evenly around the apples. 5. Finally, sprinkle 1 T sugar over each apple. 6. Bake the apples, uncovered, for 5060 minutes, till tender, basting with the casserole liquid (not the spices) every 10 minutes. 7. Serve hot or warm, spooning a bit of the liquid (without the spices) over the top of each apple and adding, if desired, a dollop of the whipped cream.
Traditional Netherlands Recipe
Bisschopswijn is also known by many other names including the German “Gluhwein” or the “Hot Wine” served in the Christmas Markets of the Czech Rebublic. It has many “cousins” such as the Scandinavian “Glogg” and other versions from Italy, Romania, and Chile which all use the same basic ingredients with a few variations.
Stove Top or Crock Pot Method
Note: These recipes were published in last year’s December issue of ACCESSline, too. Yeah, we’re big fans!
“Market Recipe” If you ever sample our product at a farmer’s market or craft show you will be sampling this recipe. This is the family friendly recipe or for those who don’t want to indulge in the wine recipe. We often make this for parties and set up what we call a “cider bar”. We put out bottles of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum, peach schnapps, cinnamon schnapps, apple schnapps and fruit flavored brandies and let guests embellish their spiced cider to their own personal taste. Always put out a few cinnamon sticks for stirring.
Stove Top or Crock Pot Method
• 32oz. cranberry juice • 32oz. apple cider • ¼ cup light brown sugar • 1 oz. (generous 1/4 cup) Bisschopswijn – Mulled Wine and Cider Spices 1. Combine the cranberry juice and apple cider in a large crock pot or large sauce pan. Add the brown sugar and stir until it is dissolved. 2. Place Bisschopswijn spices in the muslin bag provided. Close the bag by pulling the strings and tying them into a bow. 3. Place the bag of spices into the juice mixture. Cover the crock pot or sauce pan and heat the mixture until hot over a medium setting on your crock
pot or medium heat on your stove top. Do not boil. 4. Reduce the temperature to low and simmer for 30-60 minutes. Stir occasionally to make sure the brown sugar has dissolved completely. 5. Taste the Bisschopswijn occasionally. Remove the spice bag when the desired amount of “spice” is reached. 6. Ladle the hot Bisschopswijn into mugs and serve with a Cinnamon Stir Stick.
Cranberry Stuffed Apples Baked in Mulled Wine
• 4 large golden delicious apples, peeled and cored to within 1/4 inch of the bottom • 4 tablespoons whole cranberry sauce • 1 cup dry red wine • 2 tablespoons of Bisschopswijn – Mulled Wine & Cider Spices • 2 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into small pieces • 4 tablespoons sugar • Optional topping • 1 cup heavy cream, stiffly whipped with 1 tablespoon sugar, and 1/2 teaspoon vanilla. 1. Preheat oven to 350. Butter a 3-qt casserole and set aside. 2. Fill the center of each apple with cranberry sauce, mounding it ever so slightly on top. 3. Stand the apples in the prepared casserole, arranging them so they don’t touch the casserole sides or one another.
• Two 750ml bottles of dry red wine • 2/3 cup of granulated white sugar • 1oz (generous 1/4 cup) Bisschopswijn - Mulled Wine and Cider Spices 1. Pour the red wine in a crock pot or sauce pan. Add the sugar and stir until it is dissolved. 2. Place 1oz. of Bisschopswijn spices in the muslin bag* provided. Close the bag by pulling the strings. Place the bag of spices into the wine mixture. Cover the crock pot or sauce pan and heat the mixture until hot over a medium setting on your crock pot or medium heat on your stove top. Do not boil. 3. Reduce the temperature to low and simmer for 30-60 minutes. Stir occasionally to make sure the sugar has dissolved completely. 4. Taste the Bisschopswijn occasionally.
Remove the spice bag when the desired amount of “spice” is reached. 5. Ladle the hot Bisschopswijn into mugs and serve with a Cinnamon Stir Stick. Makes six 8 ounce cups.
Mulled Wine & Cider Spice Recipe
This is our signature recipe. We have been serving this recipe in Pella since the 70’s. It is a variation of the classic Bisschopswijn recipe served in The Netherlands.
Stove Top or Crock Pot Method
• 32oz. cranberry juice • 12oz. apple cider • 12oz. dry red wine • ¼ cup light brown sugar • ¼ cup apricot flavored brandy • 1 oz. (generous 1/4 cup) Bisschopswijn - Mulled Wine and Cider Spices 1. Combine the cranberry juice, apple cider and red wine in a large crock pot or large sauce pan. Add the brown sugar and stir until it is dissolved. 2. Place Bisschopswijn spices in the muslin bag* provided. Close the bag by pulling the strings. 3. Place the bag of spices into the juice and wine mixture. Cover the crock pot or sauce pan and heat the mixture until hot over a medium setting on your crock pot or medium heat on your stove top. Do not boil. 4. Reduce the temperature to low and simmer for 30-60 minutes. Stir occasionally to make sure the brown sugar has dissolved completely. 5. Taste the Bisschopswijn occasionally. Remove the spice bag when the desired amount of “spice” is reached. 6. Just before serving add the apricot flavored brandy and stir until combined. Ladle the hot Bisschopswijn into mugs and serve with a Cinnamon Stir Stick. Makes seven 8 ounce cups. Bisschopswijn is made in Pella, Iowa.The company is proudly “family” owned.
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 3: Community
ACCESSline Page 31
Inside Out: Train Wreck by Ellen Krug It’s interesting how just a few words—two or three sentences—can either bring people together or pull them apart. I was reminded about the power of words at a National Coming Out Day luncheon in the Twin Cities and again at a talk I gave in Omaha. The subject matter on both occasions: living—and prospering—as a transgender. The Coming Out Day luncheon was held at the Hilton in downtown Minneapolis and hosted by an LGBT business networking group. We’re talking fancy, with forty-some tables, a dozen corporate sponsors, and an MC who was a well known radio personality. The event featured four speakers, one of whom was a transgender I’ll call “Susie.” I met Susie a couple years ago, and found her very pleasant. She’s a passionate young thirty-something who had lived on the streets before she went sober and got steady work. She now runs a program for LGBT youth, with an emphasis on helping young transgenders navigate through the world. By anyone’s standard, she’s doing very important work. For the first few minutes, Susie’s talk was as expected. T h e re we re t h e usual references to the historic struggle of the LGBT community, and an emphasis on how Ts have often been left behind. (Think HRC and how it threw Ts under the bus with employment rights legislation.) All of this was true, and none of it made me uncomfortable. But what did make me uncomfortable was how Susie suddenly veered into left field by denouncing “white privileged gay men” who supposedly trample upon the rights of women, including male to female transgenders. From there, she accused the major sponsor of the luncheon (a Fortune 100 company whose logo was
plastered on the luncheon program) of Third World genocide and slavery. On and on she went, railing at just about everyone in the room—except other transgenders, of course. To say that her speech was appalling would be an understatement. One friend described it as a “’fiery train wreck because ‘train wreck,’ simply isn’t enough.” As a transgender woman, I was gravely e m b a r ra s s e d a n d immediately thought, no one’s ever told Susie there are a time and a place for everything. This was a luncheon hosted by an organization that had nothing to do with Susie or her causes. We were captives and, short of walking out, there was nothing anyone could do but listen. Perhaps that was the whole reason for her going rogue. In short, rather than making people more aware of—and sympathetic to—inequities particular to the Ts, Susie’s speech did just the opposite. I left the event thinking that Susie had confirmed just about every T stereotype there is—the pushy angry gender outlaw who knows nothing about messaging and collaborating, eager to shove T acceptance down everyone’s throat. The speech pushed T progress in the Cities back by at least five years. Ouch. Later that night, I wrote to the LGBT business networking group that hosted the event and apologized for Susie’s comments. “This is not how all transgenders approach the world,” I said.
Ilefttheeventthinking that Susie had confirmed just about every T stereotype there is—the pushy angry gender outlaw who knows nothing about messaging and collaborating, eager to shove T acceptance down everyone’s throat.
I gave a different kind of talk in Omaha. I had been invited by the local transgender group, the River City Gender Alliance, to speak about my story and coming out as transgender. I started by acknowledging that all of the letters in the LGBT alphabet have had their struggles, and each is worthy of respect and honor. I reminded them that what separates LGBT people from straight society is that we’ve had to face the demon of coming out to people who love and work with us. This is no easy task, and every LGBT person should be proud of making that journey. As for the Ts, I spoke of the courage needed to walk out the front door of your home for the first time presenting in a different gender than from when you last walked in. I told the Omaha group to celebrate who they are—and for the guts that it takes to be T. But, in the same breath, I reminded them of the challenges Ts face. After all, we have the highest suicide rate and incidence of drug and alcohol addictions; we have the lowest employment rate; and our coming out more often involves divorce, child estrangement, and sheer loneliness. The Ts have enough problems respecting themselves that they don’t need the added burden of fighting with the other letters of the LGBT alphabet for the “who’s suffered most” prize. In my view, we’re all in this together, which means separating any one letter from the others only helps those who would hate us. We are a community—a community of people struggling for the freedom to be ourselves. As I looked around the room in Omaha, I saw smiling people in various stages of transition, happy to hear praise—for a change. Some had barely started appearing in public true to their
The Ts have enough problems respecting themselves that they don’t need the added burden of fighting with the other letters of the LGBT alphabet for the “who’s suffered most” prize.
Ellen Krug is a writer, lawyer, human. She was a trial attorney for 28 years before realizing there is more to life. She is now on sabbatical to write a book, and if that does not work out, to wait tables. She is parent to two adult children and hoping for the best, despite the odds. She can be reached at EllenKrug75@gmail.com. gender; others had long ago transitioned. Collectively, they spoke about fear and outright discrimination—in the workplace, by neighbors and family members, and from medical providers. They were envious of the fact that Iowa—yes, wonderful Iowa, even with its right wing crazies—had a sexual orientation and gender protection law. I thought of how good I have it in Minneapolis, where there can actually be a fancy luncheon for LGBT people and someone could feel safe enough to speak out, even if the words were wrong for the setting. My new friends in Omaha are good people, just trying to make their way, trying to be humans in lives that are genuine and true. My experience there, in combination with the Coming Out Day luncheon, made me even more convinced that positive change will come only with constructive, respectful dialog, which begins with the words, “Let us remember we’re all in this together.” We must strive to connect dots, rather than to separate them. The fiery train wrecks need to end.
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Section 3: Community
NOVEMBER 2011
Twenty Questions interview by Amber Dunham
In 2010, high school student Amber Dunham participated in a class assignment to ask someone 20 questions for an LGBT essay. The person Amber chose to ask was Alexis, a transgendered woman from the Iowa City area. Amber’s questions covered Alexis’s definition of transgender, details of Alexis’s life and emotions prior to accepting her desire to be a girl, reactions from family and friends, psychological and medical requirements prior to sexual reassignment surgery, details of sexual reassignment surgery, federal and state document changes after Alexis’s surgery, advice Alexis would give to others, effects of Alexis’s change, and her religious views. Any questions or comments for Alexis can be sent care of this publication to Editor@ACCESSlineIOWA.com.
(Continued from October Issue) 19) Did you have any after effects after the change? This is a difficult question to provide an answer for. I know that there have been changes, but so many of them began even before the change occurred. The most dramatic changes occurred when I first began to use the female hormones. I had been taking them for several months, when I began to have more typical females attributes. I became much more emotional, I cried much more easily than I ever had previously, and I became much more caring, patient and mellow. As I mentioned earlier, I was originally given a prescription for a low dose of female hormones (actually 2 mg of Estradiol daily). Initially this was helpful, as it served much more as “mind candy” than it actually provided any major or physical changes. The original prescribing doctor had left for the University of Chicago and I was seeing a new physician at the time, and was reluctant to discuss too much with him until I felt more comfortable. So, I began to buy additional hormones over the internet. It really wasn’t that hard. All you needed was a credit card and a web
site. Initially I did not tell my physicians that I was taking these other medications. But as I began to develop other medical issues, I thought that it would be best if the additional hormones I was taking were put into my medical chart. In the event I was admitted suddenly it would help to reduce errors if the doctors knew all of my medications. However, my doctors were not overly impressed with the fact that I was self medicating without any monitoring. And that is when I sought out a physician to prescribe the hormones for me. Interestingly enough, my primary physician told me that he didn’t think any University Hospitals doctor was knowledgeable enough in M-F transitioning to work with me and my situation. That is when your mother, as I have mentioned elsewhere in the interview, helped me locate a gynecologist. Anyway, back to your question…the effects? In my opinion, the effects of the hormones have been mainly mental and
emotional in nature. I know the hormones are supposed to make you grow those wonderful breasts, but that didn’t work for me…then or now. I have never investigated why that didn’t happen, because I was taking hormones typically associated with gender reassignment surgery. I guess it really doesn’t matter at this point in time. Oh, well, it is a good thing we have implants available. One big thing that the hormones did do to me physically was to; in effect, medically castrate me. After being on the hormones for a while, I was no longer able to generate an erection or achieve any meaningful orgasm. Eventually the penis shrank dramatically. I then, sort of became asexual…in that I did not have any interest in sex—period. I still had sensitivity in the area, but there was simply no reaction when caressed, which was actually fine with me at the time because I had grown to totally detest the act of masturbation by then—it just felt so dirty and wrong…
One big thing that the hormones did do to me physically was to; in effect, medically castrate me.
After the surgery, the genital region initially had no sensitivity—at all. Remember, this was a truly major reconstructive surgery, and a lot of feeling was lost as many nerves and other tissues were cut in the process. But s the months have gone by, the sensitivity has gradually returned. Can I have an orgasm at this point in time? Yes, it is possible, but it is something that takes a certain level of mental effort, and I am working to be able to achieve the desired result more frequently. Is it better than before? Well, let me just say that I prefer this new version of an orgasm more. The biggest changes since the operation are psychological. I have never deliberately been a mean person, but as the years passed and my mind became increasingly preoccupied with my ‘secret’ I became more frustrated, impatient and irritable. In retrospect, I guess, for many of those years I was not always the nicest person. The jobs that I held in almost 20 years before the surgery consisted of managing an apartment complex during the day, and delivering newspapers at
TTTWENTY continued page 33
NOVEMBER 2011 SScontinued from page 32
TWENTY night. Besides the fact that I liked money, I figured that if I kept myself busy. I would have less time to sit around the apartment, drink beer, and dwell on my problems. The newspapers were wonderful, as I truly enjoy the night hours. The night is quiet, and no one hassles you as a general rule. Except for the police, who have this notion that anyone driving around at 3 AM is likely; wanted, drunk or crazy. Yet they eventually became used to me being there and didn’t pull me over any more. The apartment management job was also something I enjoyed a lot, except that it meant being around people—which could be good or bad. I was primarily responsible for the apartment rentals, the maintenance of the apartments and doing the books. I had to live on-site, so I was also on call 24 hours a day. On those days when my stress level was overwhelming, interruptions could really upset me. After all, I was preoccupied with my thoughts, and when those ‘intrusions’ came I would often respond in a highly frustrated manner. Not technically mean, but certainly not in a friendly and helpful manner. It was like “let’s just hurry and get this done so I
Section 3: Community can go back and sit on my pity pot.” Once I had finally transitioned, someone who was working with me at the time; told me that I seemed much happier and that I had actually been an asshole in the past. These days I have a lot more patience, understanding and compassion, and am much more willing to help others when I physically can. I am much happier with myself now, and I do believe that others are too. Overall, Amber, the biggest effect of the change itself was simply peace of mind. I no longer had to deal with those male parts that I so detested. I think their present location is a much more deserving place for them to be. I am truly much more satisfied with the image of myself in a mirror than I ever have been before. I have no doubt in my mind that I am a much better person since I began my new life as Alexis, and I truly hope that I can continue to become a better person every day. 20) How do you feel about God? And do you think this is something that God would ‘approve’? This is an issue many people like me struggle with and it is a difficult issue. Some of us were raised in faiths that condemned actions or lifestyles, such as mine; as immoral or wrong or sinful. Like the similar pressure we receive from society, religion often makes us try to be
In retrospect, I guess, for many of those years I was not always the nicest person.
someone we aren’t. The problem with religious pressure is that the stakes are higher. Society’s disapproval is nothing compared to jeopardizing one’s soul, some feel. Transition is about living more truthfully, and many of us set up a massive deception to hide our feelings from others. Sometimes, we even deceive ourselves. When this deception is caused by religious pressure, it can create an emotionally wrenching and devastating dilemma when one realizes she has to transition. There are certainly passages in religious writings, such as the Bible, that can be used to condemn when taken out of context. The Old Testament is often quoted…a book like Deuteronomy comes to mind right now. First Corinthians, Chapter 6, is another one. And, there are those who use those words very freely. Many fundamentalist sects here in the United States take a literal interpretation of the Bible and use that to justify hatred of transgender people, among others. However, there are other examples where there is more tolerance. Several Palestinian pagan sects involved worship where priests would cross dress in sexchanging rituals, eunuchs known as castrati were highly respected singers in European cathedrals. Their full-throated
ACCESSline Page 33 soprano voices were considered an appropriate and inspirational form of praise to God. In many Native-American cultures, those who dressed as the opposite sex were not only tolerated, but highly respected. In some, they were considered spiritual leaders. So, for me, I eventually distanced myself from religion, organized or otherwise, because I never quite felt that the Almighty would be accepting of someone who had thoughts that I did. The whole process of self discovery led me to question my faith more than once. Why would God do this (Gender Dysphoria) to anyone? Why God…is of course the eternal question. The answer of faith is that God has done nothing ‘to’ us—only for us. Our roads and journeys are unique, and we work out our lives—or not, depending upon our faith. I have now come to better accept the notion that the ‘hell’ I went through for so many years, was an experience that I needed in order to become who I am now. I have made peace with my feelings about religion, and in recent years have attended different churches, and even some pagan functions. I am not the most devout believer, but I feel that I do have a good sense of spirituality and use that as a guide to my life today.
Many fundamentalist sects here in the United States take a literal interpretation of the Bible and use that to justify hatred of transgender people, among others.
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Section 3: Community
NOVEMBER 2011
NOVEMBER 2011 DIRECTORY NOTICE The ACCESSline community directory is updated each issue. LISTINGS ARE FREE but are limited by space. Free online listings are available at www.ACCESSlineIOWA.com. Information about new listings must contain a phone number for publication and a contact (e-mail address, land address, or website) for our records. For more information or to provide corrections, please contact Editor@ACCESSlineIOWA.com or call (319) 550-0957.
NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS Please see the list of resources below about HIV, mental health, sexual orientation, and where you may seek help if you’re in crisis. HIV and STD Testing Sites near You, including places where you can get tested for free: http://www.hivtest.org/ Crisis or Suicide National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ Default.aspx or call 1-800-273-TALK Information on Mental Health National Alliance on Mental Illness: http://www.nami.org/ Counseling, Information and Resources about Sexual Orientation GLBT National Help Center: http://www.glnh.org/index2.html or 1-888-8434564 Information on Mental Health for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender http://www.nami.org/Content/NavigationMenu/ Find_Support/Multicultural_Support/Resources/ GLBT_Resources.htm Information on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Health http://www.cdc.gov/lgbthealth/index.htm Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund 1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350, Washington, DC 20005 www.victoryfund.org. 202-VICTORY [842-8679] Human Rights Campaign National political organization, lobbies congress for lesbian & gay issues, political training state and local www.hrc.org 1-800-777-HRCF[4723] Lambda Legal Defense & Education Fund I I E. Adams, Suite 1008, Chicago, IL 60603 www.lambdalegal.org 312-663-4413 Fax: 312-663-4307 MortgageLoan.com Housing & Mortgages for Gay & Lesbian Couples, http://www.mortgageloan.com/lgbt/ National Gay & Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF) 1325 Massachusetts Ave NW, Ste 600, Washington, DC, 20005 www.ngltf.org / taskforce.org National Organization for Women (NOW) 733 15th ST NW, 2nd Floor Washington, DC 20005 www.now.org 202-628-8669 PFLAG National Offices 1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350, Washington, DC 20005 info@pflag.org - www.pflag.org 202-467-8180 The Trevor Lifeline The Trevor Project operates the only nationwide, around-the-clock crisis and suicide prevention lifeline for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth. Each year, our lifeline fields more than 30,000 calls from LGBTQ youth as well as their families, friends and educators. (866) 4-U-TREVOR - (866) 488-7386 Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year All calls are toll-free and confidential http://www.thetrevorproject.org/
STATE ORGANIZATIONS Equality Iowa P.O. Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125 www.equalityiowa.org 515-537-3126 Faithful Voices Interfaith Alliance of Iowa’s marriage equality project. www.faithfulvoices.org Imperial Court of Iowa Non-profit fundraising & social, statewide organization with members from across the State of Iowa. PO Box 1491, Des Moines, IA 50306-1491 www.imperialcourtofiowa.org Iowa Chapter of the National Organization for Women (NOW) Janis Bowden, President, IA NOW janleebow@aol.com PO Box 41114, Des Moines, IA 503111 Iowa Gay Rodeo Association (IAGRA) 921 Diagonal Rd, Malcom, IA 50157 polebender60@yahoo.com 641-990-1411
Section 3: Community Iowa PFLAG (Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gay) State Council PO Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125 http://community.pflag.org/Page. aspx?pid=194&srcid=-2 515-537-3126 or 641-583-2024 Iowa Pride Network 777 Third Street, Suite 312, Des Moines, Iowa 50309 Iowapridenetwork.org Executive Director: 515-471-8062 Outreach Coordinator: 515-471-8063 LGBT Youth in Iowa Schools Task Force PO Box 1997, Des Moines, 50306 515-243-1221 One Iowa 500 East Locust St, Ste 300 Des Moines, IA 50309 515-288-4019 Fax: 515-244-5846 www.OneIowa.org
Steve’s Place 852 Washington St, Burlington 319-754-5868 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Services start at 10:30 am 625 N 6th St, Burlington, IA 52601-5032 (319) 753-1895 - www.uuburlington.org
Cedar Falls - Waterloo Adult Cinema 315 E 4th St Waterloo, IA 50703-4703 (319) 234-7459 Black Hawk Co. Health Department Free HIV testing (donations accepted); MW, 1:00pm to 3:00pm; Thurs, 1:00pm to 4:45pm 1407 Independence Ave. (5th fl) Waterloo 50703 319-291 -2413
The Quire Eastern Iowa’s GLBT chorus www.thequire.org
Cedar AIDS Support System (CASS) Service, support groups & trained volunteers for persons with HIV/AIDS in Waterloo/CF call Elizabeth or Karla, 319-272-AIDS(2437). cvhospice@forbin.net
First United Methodist Church 516 Kellogg Ave, Ames, IA 50010 Contemporary worship Sat. 5:30; Sun at 8:30 and 11:00am. www.acswebnetworks.com/firstunitedmcames/ 515-232-2750
Cedar Valley Counseling Services Promoting personal growth and development in a strengths-based environment Joan E. Farstad, MA, Director. 319-240-4615 www.cvcounseling.com farstd@cvcounseling.com.
Ames
Living with HIV Program 126 S. Kellogg, Suite 1 Ask for Janelle (Coordinator) 515-956-3312 ext 106 or I -800-890-8230 ISU LGBTA Alliance GLBT Support, Activism, Social Events, Newsletter L East Student Office Space 2229 Lincoln Way, Ames, IA 50014-7163 alliance@iastate.edu http://www.alliance.stuorg.iastate.edu 515-344-4478 Lord of Life Lutheran 2126 Gable Lane, Ames 50014 Services Sundays at 9:00a.m.; Wed. 7:00pm. 515-233-2350 PFLAG Ames Youth and Shelter Services Offices 2328 Bristol Drive, Ames, IA 5001 2nd Tuesday, 7pm www.pflagames.org 515-291-3607 Romantics Pleasure Palace 117 Kellogg Street, Ames, IA 50010-3315 http://www.romantixonline.com 515-232-7717 United Church of Christ-Congregational 6th & Kellogg, Ames, 50010 Sunday Continental Breakfast, 9:00am; Sunday School, 9:30am; Worship 10:45am. uccames@midiowa.net. 515-232-9323 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Ames 1015 Hyland Ave. Services: 9:30 am and 11:30 am, Sunday www.uufames.org uufa@aol.com 515-292-5960 Unity Church of Ames 226 9th St. Sunday service and Sunday school 10:30am. Wednesday mediation 6:30pm, . www.websyt/unity/ames Daily dial-a-blessing 515-233-1613
Arnolds Park, Okoboji, Spencer, Spirit Lake The Royal Wedding Chapel 504 Church Street, Royal, IA 51357 712-933-2223 www.TheRoyalWeddingChapel.com Wilson Resource Center An Iowa Great Lakes area gay-owned nonprofit community based organization. PO Box 486, 597 W. Okoboji Rd., Arnolds Park IA 51331-0486 F.JosephWilson@aol.com. www.wilsonresource.org 712-332-5043
BURLINGTON Arrowhead Motel 2520 Mount Pleasant St Burlington, IA 52601-2118 319-752-6353 www.arrowheadia.com Faith Lutheran Church E L C A 3109 Sunnyside Ave Burlington, IA 52601-2341 HIV/AIDS Screening @ Des Moines County Health Department in Burlington 522 N 3rd By appointment between 8:00am to 4:30 319-753-8217 Confidential RISQUES IV (adult store) 421 Dry Creek Ave, West Burlington, IA 52601 (319) 753-5455 Sun - Wed 8am-Midnight Thurs - Sat Open 24 Hours www.LoversPlayground.com
Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry. In Lutheran Center 2616 College St, Cedar Falls, IA 319-415-5747 mcdinoiwa@aol.com www.episcopalcampus.org Community AIDS Assistance Project (CAAP) Funding for special personal needs, community projects, and small grants that are AIDS related. PO Box 36, Waterloo, IA 50704 LGBTA Support Group at Hawkeye Community College Call Carol at 319-296-4014 for time & location of meeting carol.hedberg@hawkeyecollege.edu Iowa Legal Aid Free civil legal service available to low income persons who qualify under income/asset guidelines. 607 Sycamore, #206, Waterloo, IA 50703 1-800-772-0039 or 319-235-7008 Kings & Queens Tap 304 W. 4th St, Waterloo, IA www.//myspace.com/kingsandqueensspace 319-232-3001 Romantix Waterloo (Adult Emporium) 1507 La Porte Rd, Waterloo, IA 50702 319-234-9340 http://www.romantixonline.com/ Stellas Guesthouse 324 Summit Ave, Waterloo, IA Private B&B, Overnight accommodations for adults only. 319-232-2122 St. Lukes Episcopal Church 2410 Melrose Dr, Cedar Falls, IA 50613 www.st-lukes-episcopal.org Services: Sunday 8:00 & 10:15, Thurs 11:30 319-277-8520 St. Timothys United Methodist Church 3220 Terrace Drive, Cedar Falls, 50613 sttimsumc.org, 319-266-0464, info@sttims-umc-org, Contact Rev. Linda Butler “...welcome of all persons, including those of all sexual orientations and gender identities.” Together For Youth 233 Vold Dr, Waterloo, IA 50703 www.TogetherForYouth.net 319-274-6768 UNI-LGBTA Alliance-Student Organization 244A Bartlet Hall, University of Northern Iowa Cedar Falls 50613 lgbta@uni.edu 319-222-0003 United Church of Christ Cedar Falls 9204 University Avenue, Cedar Falls 319-366-9686 Unitarian Universalist Society of Black Hawk County 3912 Cedar Heights Dr, Cedar Falls, IA 319-266-5640
Cedar Rapids/marion Adult Shop 630 66th Ave SW, 319-362-4939 Adult Shop North 5539 Crane Lane, 319-294-5360 Cedar Rapids Unity (Formerly GLRC of Cedar Rapids) Support, social activities. lnfo@crglrc.org, cedarrapidsunity.org or write to PO Box 1643 Cedar Rapids 52406-1643 Call and leave a message—all calls will be returned. 319-366-2055
Christ Episcopal Church “We have a place for you.” 220 40th Street NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52404 319-363-2029 www.ChristEpiscopal.org Club Basix Open 5pm to 2am M-F, Sat & Sun 3pm-2am 3916 1st Ave NE, Cedar Rapids 319-363-3194 Coe Alliance Education, activism & fun for GLBTQ and straight students, staff and people from the community. Coe College 1220 First Ave NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52402 For information contact: coealliance@coe.edu or Erica Geers, faculty advisor at 319-861-6025 Community Health Free Clinic 947 14th Avenue SE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52401 319-363-0416 www.communityhfc.org Free Medical Services provided for the uninsured and underserved patients of Cedar Rapids, Marion and the surrounding areas in Eastern Iowa. CSPS Legion Arts Contemporary Arts Center 1103 3rd St. SE info@legionarts.org 319-364-1580 Eden United Church of Christ 351 8th Ave SW, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404 (319) 362-7805 Sunday School 9am - Worship 10:15am Faith UMC 1000 30th Street NE, Cedar Rapids, 52402 Sunday services at 11:00am. www.crfaithumc.org 319-363-8454 Foundation 2 Crisis Counseling 24-hour telephone crisis counseling. f2crisis@aol.com or www.f2online.org 1540 2nd Ave. SE Cedar Rapids, IA 319-362-2174 or 800-332-4224 Linn County Public Health 501 13th NW Free confidential HIV testing, 319-892-6000 Linn County Stonewall Democrats 2nd Wednesday of every month, 6:30-8 p.m. The LGBT Caucus of the Democratic Party, meets at March 9 we will be at the Kirkwood Hotel Lobby Cafe.After that we may go back to Blue Strawberry downtown, but we need time to check our options. For more info, contact linnstonewall@ gmail.com Rapid AIDS Grant Wood Area Red Cross 3600 Rockwell Dr NE, Cedar Rapids, 52410 319-393-9579. People’s Church Unitarian Universalist A welcoming congregation. 4980 Gordon Ave NW, Cedar Rapids, IA 11am Sunday. 319-362-9827 PFLAG CR, Linn Co and Beyond Meets at Coffee Talk Cafe 37 Kirkwood Court SW Cedar Rapids, IowaContact Person: Diane Peterson Phone: 319-362-9827 6:30pm on the 4th Thursdays except months like November. (Email ddpeters57@gmail.com for alternate dates.) The Linn County Stonewall Democrats Meet 2nd Wednesdays, Blue Strawberry, 118 2nd St SE in Cedar Rapids, IA. Contact Harvey S. Ross, HRoss007@aol.com. Toxic Nightclub 616 Second Ave SE, Cedar Rapids Tri-ess, Iota Kappa Phi Chapter P.O. Box 8605, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52408 We are a transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends. www.yahoo.com/group/Tri-essIotaKappaPhi www.tri-ess.org, 319-390-6376 E-mail: Georgia georgia523@yahoo.com E-mail: Judy marlenemarschel@yahoo.com Unity Center of Cedar Rapids “A center of positive, practical Christianity.” 4980 Gordon NE, Cedar Rapids www.unitycr.org - (319) 393-5422
CLINTON Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Clinton 309 30th Avenue North, Clinton, IA 52732 (563) 242-4972 - uuclinton.org Sunday services at 10:30 (year-round) Where YOUR spiritual and ethical journey is welcome! Rev. Ruby Nancy, minister
Council Bluffs, Omaha (Ne) AIDS Interfaith Network 100 N. 62nd, Omaha, NE Call Br. Wm. Woeger 402-558-3100 Broadway Joe’s 3400 W Broadway, Council Bluffs, IA 51501 712-256-2243 Citizens For Equal Protection 1105 Howard St, Suite #2, Omaha, NE 68102 www.cfep-ne.org - info@cfep-ne.org 402-398-3027
ACCESSline Page 35 Council Bluffs NOW Write PO Box 3325, Omaha, NE 68103-0325 DC’s Saloon 610 S. 14th St., Omaha, NE Open everyday 2pm-1am, western/levi/leather. 402-344-3103 Front Runners/Front Walkers Walking/jogging club. P.O. Box 4583, Omaha, NE 68104 402-496-3658. GLBT Rainbow Outreach Omaha Serving GLBT community in eastern Nebraska and western Iowa. Excellent message and info. Also office for Imperial court of Nebraska. 1719 Leavenworth St, Omaha, NE www.rocc.org - 402-341-0330 Heartland Gay Rodeo Association (HGRA) (Midwest Division of the International Gay Rodeo Association) PO Box 3354, Omaha, NE 68103 www.hgra.net - 402-203-4680 HGRA serves both Iowa and Nebraska Imperial Court of Nebraska P.O. Box 3772, Omaha, NE 68103 402-556-9907 Inclusive Life “Religious and Non religious care, services and ceremonies for all!”, 105 S. 49 Street, Suite E, Omaha, NE 68132, (402) 575-7006, http:// inclusifelife.org The Max 1417 Jackson at 15th, Omaha, NE 68102 6 bars in 1 - 402-346-4110 MCC Omaha 819 South 22nd, Omaha, NE 68103 Sun 9 & 11 am Wednesday “ReCharge” Worship, Wed 7pm 402-345-2563 PFLAG Omaha Mead Hall, First United Methodist Church 7020 Cass St. (Omaha) 2nd Thursday, 7, 6:30 Social time 402-291-6781 River City Mixed Chorus Gay/lesbian chorus PO Box 3267 Omaha, NE 68103 Call Stan Brown, marketing 402-341-7464. Romantix Council Bluffs (North) (Adult Emporium) 3216 1st Ave, Council Bluffs, IA 51501-3353 http://www.romantixonline.com 515-955-9756 Tri-ess Chapter, Kappa Phi Lambda Chapter Omaha, NE 68107 We are a transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends. www.tri-ess.org, 402-960-9696 E-mail: Judy marlenemarschel@yahoo.com Romantix Council Bluffs (South) (Romantix After Dark) 50662 189th St, Council Bluffs, IA 51503 http://www.romantixonline.com 712-366-1764 Youth Support Group for GLBT Youth 13-21, meets twice monthly. Omaha, NE - 402-291- 6781
Decorah Decorah Human Rights Commission Contact: City Clerk 400 Clairborne Dr, Decorah 563-382-3651 Meetings: First Tuesdays, 5:30pm Luther College Student Congregation Contact Office for College Ministry 700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101 563-387-1040. PFLAG Northeast IA (Waukon/Decorah) Beginning May 23rd: meeting at Northeast Iowa Peace and Justice Center, 119 Winnebago Street, Decorah, IA (lower level), corner of Winnebago and Main Street Meetings: 4th Mondays, 7pm-9pm Call Jean @ 563-535-7680 PRIDE Luther College Diversity Center, 700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101 Contact Chris at 563-387-2145 or Melanie at 563-387-1273 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Meets alternating Sundays at 10:30am, Decorah Senior Center 806 River St Call Bill at 563-382-3458.
Des Moines AIDS Project of Central Iowa Free HIV testing, prevention supplies, care services, food pantry, information. 711 E. 2nd, Des Moines, IA 50309 515-284-0245 Blazing Saddle 416 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA - 515-246-1299 www.theblazingsaddle.com Buddies Corral 418 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA - 515-244-7140
ACCESSline Page 36 The CENTER 1300 Locust The new LGBT and progressive place to be. thecenterdm@gmail.com Facebook: The CENTER & Equality Iowa www.equalityiowa.org 515-243-0313 Church of the Holy Spirit-MCC Pastor Pat Esperanza Sunday service 10:30am at the 1st Christian Church 2500 University, Des Moines chsmccdmia@aol.com 515-287-9787 Des Moines Diversity Chorus [A gay-friendly mixed chorus] Rehearsals on Mondays at 7 p.m. at Westminster Presbyterian Church, Beaver Ave. at Franklin St., Des Moines. All are welcome, no auditions. PO Box 65312, West Des moines, IA 50265 Julie Murphy, Artistic Director jahmurphy@hotmail.com, 515-255-3576, desmoinesdiversitychorus.org Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus 515-953-1540 4126 Ingersoll Ave., Des Moines administrator@dmgmc.org Family Practice Center Safe, supportive LGBT health care. 200 Army Post Road, Ste 26 www.ppgi.org 515-953-7560 First Friday Breakfast Club Educational breakfast club for gay/bisexual men. Meets first Friday of each month. Contact Jonathan Wilson for meeting topic and place. 515-288-2500 info@ffbciowa.org www.ffbciowa.org First Unitarian Church 1800 Bell Avenue Services Sundays at 9:30 & 11am 515-244-8603, www.ucdsm.org The Gallery (adult store) 1000 Cherry St Des Moines, IA 50309-4227 (515) 244-2916 Open 24 Hours www.LoversPlayground.com The Garden 112 SE 4th Des Moines, IA 515-243-3965 Wed-Sun. 8pm-2am www.grdn.com Gay & Lesbian AA & AI-Anonymous Mon. 7 pm; Tues. - Thurs. 6 pm; Sat. 5:30 pm at Drake Ministries in Ed. Bldg. 28th & University Gay and Lesbian Issues Committee 4211 Grand Avenue, Level-3 Des Moines, IA 50312 515-277-1117 Java Joe’s Gay friendly 214 4th St. , 515-288-5282, www.javajoescoffeehouse.com Lavender Victory Fund Financial assistance for women in need for medical emergencies. lavendervf@aol.com Le Boi Bar 508 Indianola Rd, Des Moines, IA Liberty Gifts 333 E. Grand Ave., Loft 105, Des Moines, IA Gay owned specialty clothing, jewelry, home decor. 515-508-0825 MINX Show Palace 1510 NE Broadway, Des Moines, IA 50313 Open m-th noon-2 a.m., f noon-3 am., sat 3 p.m.-e a.m. 515-266-2744 North Star Gay Rodeo Association of IGRA, Iowa Division of North Star NSGRA@NSGRA.org or 612-82-RODEO Rainbow Union, Drake University ru@drake.edu Ray Perry Law Firm 515-279-2244 Free Initial Consultation PFLAG Des Moines 515-243-0313, 1300 Locust , Des Moines, IA 50312 Plymouth Congregational UCC Church and the Plymouth GLBT Community 4126 Ingersoll Ave. 515-255-3149 Services at 9am & I lam Sunday. www.PlymouthGLBT.com Polk County Health Department Free STD, HIV, and Hepatitis B & C testing. HIV. Rapid testing also offered. 1907 Carpenter, Des Moines, IA 515-286-3798. Pride Alliance, AIB College of Business Gay and straight students celebrating diversity Contact: Mike Smith, Advisor PrideAlliance@aib.edu www.aib.edu/pride Pride Bowling League for GLBT & Supporters Every Wednesday, 7 PM, Air Lanes Bowling Center 4200 Fleur Drive, Des Moines, IA 503212389. Email pridebowlingleague@gmail.com or 515-447-2977. Raccoon River Resort Accommodations for men, women, or mixed in campgrounds, lodge, Teepees or Treehouses. Reservations: 515-996-2829 or 515-279-7312
Section 3: Community Ritual Café On 13th between Grand and Locust. Gay owned great music, awesome food and coffee. 515-288-4872 ritualcafe@aol.com - ritualcafe.com Romantix North Des Moines Iowa (Bachelor’s Library) 2020 E Euclid Ave, Des Moines, IA 50317 www.romantixonline.com 515-266-7992 Spouses of Lesbians & Gays Support group for spouses of gays and lesbians. 515-277-7754 St. John’s Lutheran Church 600 6th Ave “A Church for All People.” Services Sat 5pm, Sun 7:45, 8:45 & 11am. See web page for other services. 515-243-7691 - www.StJohnsDSM.org TransformationsIOWA Monthly meetings for the female to male, male to female, transgender community, cross dressers, gender queer, questioning, and their significant others. For location and info, email at r.eliason@hotmail.com or call 515-979-6959 Trinity United Methodist Church 1548 Eighth Street - 515-288-4056 Services Sundays at 10am, www.trinityumcdm.org Urbandale UCC An open & affirming congregation. 3530 70th St., Urbandale, IA 50322 515-276-0625, www.urbucc.org Walnut Hills UMC Join us at 8:30 or 10:45am for Sunday worship. Sunday classes and group studies are at 9:30am. 515-270-9226 12321 Hickman Rd, Urbandale, IA 50323 www.whumc.org Westminster Presbyterian Church 4114 Allison Ave - www.WestPres.org Sunday services 8:45 and 11am. Of note is their GAY-LESBIAN-STRAIGHT AFFIRMATION GROUP, GLSA 515-274-1534 Women’s Culture Collective (WCC) A lesbian social group. Des Moines, IA - www.iowawcc.org Zanzibar’s Coffee Adventure Open daily. Gay-friendly 2723 Ingersoll, Des Moines, IA 515-244-7694
Dubuque Adult Warehouse 975 Jackson St., Dubuque, IA 563-588-9184. Dubuque Friends Worship Group (Quakers) Join us at an unprogrammed worship service on Sunday at 10am. Welcoming and Affirming St. Mark’s Community Center 1201 White Street, Dubuque, Iowa 52001 563-582-9388 PFLAG Dubuque/Tri-State Carnegie Stout Library 3rd Floor Conference Room 360 W. 11th St. 3rd Tuesday, 7pm 563-581-4606 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Dubuque 1699 Iowa St., Dubuque, IA “The uncommon denomination.” general services at 10am. www.uuf-dbq.org 563-583-9910
ELKADER Bethany Church (ELCA) 307 3rd St NE, Elkader IA 52043 Pastor Jim Klosterboer 563-245-1856 www.alpinecom.net/~bethanychurch bethanychurch@alpinecom.net Inclusive. Welcoming. Discover the Difference. Bethany is a Reconciling in Christ congregation of LC/NA Schera’s Restaurant and Bar 107 S Main St, Elkader, IA 52043 563-245-1992 Scheras.com E-mail: info@scheras.com Fine dining featuring Algerian & American Cuisine. Voted Best Mediterranean Restaurant in Eastern Iowa on KCRG TV-9’s A*List.
Fort Dodge Romantix Fort Dodge (Mini Cinema) Sun-Thu 10am-12am, Fri & Sat 10am-2am 515-955-9756 15 N. 5th St, Fort Dodge, IA 50501-3801 RomantixOnline.com
Grinnell Saints Ephrem & Macrina Orthodox Mission. Welcoming worship in the Eastern Christian liturgical tradition. Sunday services at 10am. (Affiliated with the OrthodoxCatholic Church of America.) Divine Liturgy is served Sundays during the College academic year 1:30 p.m., Herrick Chapel, Grinnell College Campus 1226 Broad Street, Grinnell, IA 641-236-0936
Stonewall Resource Center Open 4:30pm to 11:30pm, Sun through Thurs and by Appointment. Grinnell College 1210 Park Street PO Box B-1, Grinnell, IA, 50112 srcenter@grinnell.edu 641-269-3327
INDIANOLA Crossroads United Church of Christ (UCC) An Open & affirming congregation. Services: Sunday 10:30am, Summer worship: June, July, Aug, @ 9:30 am, worshiping in the Lounge at Smith Chapel, Simpson College, corner of Buxton and Clinton. Mailing address: P.O. Box 811, Indianola, IA 50125 515-961-9370. www.crossroadsucc.org
Iowa City AA (GLBT) 319-338-9111 Meetings Sundays 5 - 6pm at First Baptist Church, 500 North Clinton Street. For more info, call IC Intergroup Answering Service, Congregational Church UCC An Open and Affirming Congregation Sunday Worship 10:15 a.m. 30 N. Clinton St. (across from Ul Pentacrest) 319-337-4301 - www.uiccic.org Counseling Clinic 319-354-6238 Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender sensitive and supportive counseling for individuals, couples, families and groups. Sliding Fee. 505 E Washington St., Iowa City, IA 52240 Counseling and Health Center 319-337-1679 Client-centered therapy. Les-Bi-Gay-Trans always welcome. 616 Bloomington St, Iowa City, IA Crisis Center 319-351-0140 1121 Gilbert Court, Iowa City, 52240 Emma Goldman Clinic 227 N. Dubuque St, Iowa City, IA 52245 319-337-2111or 1-800-848-7684. Faith United Church of Christ 1609 De Forest Street, Iowa City, IA Services Sundays at 9:30am 319-338-5238 GLBTAU-U of lA Student support system and resource center, info, activism, events, and other community involvements. 203 IMU, University of IA Iowa City, IA 52242-1317 glbtau@uiowa.edu 319-335-3251 (voice mail) Hope United Methodist Church Worship Service at 9:30am. 2929 E. Court St., Iowa City, IA Contact Rev. Sherry Lohman. 319-338-9865 Human Rights Commission (City of Iowa City Human Rights Commission) 319-356-5022; 391-356-5015; 319-356-5014 Fax 319-887-6213 humanrights@iowa-city.org ICARE (Iowa Center for AIDS Resources & Education) Practical & emotional support, youth programs, information, referrals and support groups. 3211 E 1st Iowa City, IA 52240-4703 319-338-2135 Iowa City Free Medical Clinic Free & strictly confidential HIV Testing. 2440 Towncrest Dr Iowa City, Call for appointment 319-337-4459 Iowa City NOW PO Box 2944, Iowa City, IA 52244 for information & meeting times/places Iowa Women’s Music Festival P.O. Box 3411, Iowa City, IA 52244 319-335-1486 Men Supporting Men 319-356-6038, Ext 2 HIV prevention program exploring issues that gay/bisexual men deal with on a daily basis. Discussion Groups, Educational Series, Safer Sex Workshops, Book Club. Contact Andy Weigel, email: aweigel@co.johnson.ia.us New Song Episcopal Church 912 20th Ave, Coralville, IA Sunday services at 10am. Rev. Elizabeth Coulter, Pastor Rev. John Harper, Associate. 319-351-3577 Pride Committee WRAC 130 N. Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242 Bridget Malone - 319-338-0512 Charles Howes - 319-335-1486. Romantix Iowa City (Pleasure Palace I) 315 Kirkwood Ave, Iowa City, IA 52240-4722 www.romantixonline.com 319-351-9444
Unitarian Universalist Society of Iowa City Inclusive and free religious community nurturing intellectual and spiritual growth and fostering ethical and social responsibility. 10 S. Gilbert, Iowa City, IA Sunday services: 9:30am & 11:15am. www.uusic.org 319-337-3443 United Action for Youth (UAY) A GLBTQA youth group providing support and counseling for teenagers and young adults processing sexual identity issues. Meets Mondays 7-9pm at UAY 410 Iowa Ave. Iowa City, IA 319-338-7518 or Teen Line, 319-338-0559. The Ursine Group Bear Events in the Midwest. PO Box 1143, Iowa City, IA 52244-1143 319-338-5810 Vortex Gifts 211 E. Washington, downtown Iowa City 319-337-3434 Women’s Resource Action Center (WRAC) Leads & collaborates on projects that serve U of l and the greater community, offers social & support services, including LGBT Coming Out Group. University of Iowa 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242 319-335-1486
Marshalltown Adult Odyssey (Adult Video Store) 907 Iowa Ave E - 641-752-6550 Domestic Violence Alternatives/ Sexual Assault Center, Inc., 132 W Main St. 24 hour Crisis Line: 641-753-3513 or (instate only) 800-779-3512
MASON CITY Cerro Gordo County Dept. of Public Health 22 N. Georgia Ave, Ste 300 Mason City, IA 50401. Free confidential AIDS testing. 641-421-9321 PFLAG North Iowa Chapter 641-583-2848, pflagmcni@yahoo.com, Carlos O’Kelly’s Mexican Cafe @ 7 p.m. Wed.
Mount Vernon Alliance Cornell College 810 Commons Cir # 2035 alliance@cornellcollege.edu orgs.cornellcollege.edu/alliance/
Pella Common Ground (Central College) Support group for GLBT students and allies. Contact: Brandyn Woodard, Director of Intercultural Life woodardb@central.edu 641-628-5134
Quad Cities AIDS Project Quad Cities Info, education & support. Davenport, IA 52804, www.apqc4life.org 319-762-LIFE Augie’s Tap 313 20th St, Rock Island (IL) Noon - 3am daily. 309-788-7389 Black Hawk College Unity Alliance Serving GLBT community at Black Hawk College. 6600 34th Ave, Rock Island, IL 309-716-0542. Connections Nightclub 563-322-1121 822 W 2nd St, Davenport, IA 52802 DeLaCerda House 309-786-7386 Provides housing & supportive services, advocacy and referrals for people living with HIV/ AIDS. P.O. Box 4551, Rock Island, Il. 61201 Good Samaritan Free Clinic 602 35th Avenue Moline, IL 309-797-4688 gsfc@mchsi.com - Provides free primary medical care to patients age 16-64 who are working but have no medical insurance. Patients are seen by volunteer physicians, nurss practicioners, and physician assistants. www.GoodSamaritanFreeClinic.org The Hole-In-The-Wall 309-289-2375 A Private Membership Men’s Club Located 3 miles east of Galesburg, IL just north of I-74 at Exit 51 www.HoleInTheWallMensClub.org Holy Spirit Catholic Faith Community Meets one Sunday per month for Mass at 6:30pm at MCC-QC 3019 N. Harrison St, Davenport, IA Mailing: PO Box 192 East Moline, IL 61244 For more info, call 309-278-3359 Mary’s On 2nd 563-884-8014 832 W. 2nd St. Davenport, IA
Studio 13 13 S. Linn St. (in the Alley) Iowa City, IA Open 7pm ‘til 2am, daily 319-338-7145
MCC Quad Cities - Svcs Sun 11am, Bible study Wed 7pm 563-324-8281 3019 N Harrison, Davenport, IA 52803
U of I Lesbian, Gay & Bisexual Staff & Faculty Association c/o WRAC, 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242, 19-335-1486
Men’s Coming Out/Being Out Group Meets 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 7pm. QCAD.OutForGood@GMail.com 309-786-2580
NOVEMBER 2011 PFLAG Quad Cities 563-285-4173 Eldridge United Methodist Church 604 S.2nd St., Eldridge 1st Monday, 6:30 pm Prism (Augustana College) 309-794-7406 Augustana Gay-Straight Alliance Augustana Library 639 38th St, Rock Island, IL Contact Tom Bengston Quad Citians Affirming Diversity (QCAD) Social & support groups for lesbian, bi, and gay teens, adults, friends & families; newsletter. 309-786-2580 - Community Center located at 1608 2nd Ave, Rock Island. Quad Cities Pride Chorus At the MCC Church in D’port, 7pm Wed. qcswede64@aol.com Call Don at 563-324-0215 Rainbow Gifts www.rainbowgifts.net 309-764-0559 T.R. Video Adult books & video 3727 Hickory Grove Rd, Davenport, IA 563-386-7914 Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Quad Cities, Rev Jay Wolin Sunday Service 11am 3707 Eastern Avenue, Davenport, IA 52807 563-359-0816 Venus News (Adult) 902 W 3rd St, Davenport, IA 563-322-7576
Red Oak First Congregational United Church of Christ 608 E Reed St, Red Oak, IA 51566 (712) 623-2794 Rev. Elizabeth Dilley, Pastor uccwebsites.net/firstcongredoakia.html firstconguccredoak@yahoo.com Open and affirming.
SHENANDOAH PFLAG Shenandoah 712-899-2743
Sioux City Am. Business & Professional Guild. Gay Businessmen. Meets last Sat. of the month; ABPG P. O. BOX 72, Sioux City, 51102 abpguild@yahoo.com Grace United Methodist Church 1735 Morningside Avenue 712-276-3452. Jones Street Station (Bar) 712-258-6922 412 Jones St. Nightly 6:00pm to 2:00am. Mayflower Congregational Church. 1407 West 18th Street Call 712-258-8278. Morningside College Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual Alliance 712-274-5208 Contact Professor Gail Dooley, Advisor Morningside College GSA 1501 Morningside Ave. Sioux City, IA 51106-1717 dooley@morningside.edu PFLAG Siouxland PO Box 1311, Sioux City, IA 51102 siouxlandPFLAG@aol.com Romantix Sioux City 712-277-8566 (Adult Emporium) 511 Pearl St, Sioux City, IA 51101-1217 St. Thomas Episcopal Church Service Sun 10:30am 406 12th St, Waverly, IA Rev Mary Christopher 712-258-0141 Western Iowa Tech. GSA widemal@juno.com for info. Zaner’s Bar 712-277-9575 3103 N Hwy 75, Sioux City, IA 51105 Monthly drag shows & events; hometown bar for Imperial Court of Iowa’s Western Chapter zaners-sioux-city@hotmail.com
Waverly Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry. 717 W. Bremer, (St. Andrew’s Episcopal) Waverly, IA www.episcoplcampus.org 319-415-5747 Gay, Lesbian Bisexual Student Alliance Wartburg College, Waverly, IA 50677 Contact Susan Vallem 319-352-8250 St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church 717 W. Bremer We welcome all to worship with us on Sunday at 10:30am. Bible discussion Wed. 6:45pm Rev. Maureen Doherty, Pastor 319-352-1489
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UI TransCollaborations Presents TransWeek! 2011 November 6th - November 13th, 2011 Sunday, November 6th 6-9 pm Candlelight Vigil & Coffeehouse style Open Mic The UI LGBT Resource Center (125 Grand Avenue Ct) In observation of Transgender Day of Remembrance, the evening will begin with a few readings and a candlelight vigil to honor trans-identified people who have experienced hate crimes. After the vigil, everyone is invited to end the evening on a note of hope through sharing poems, prose, music, dance, etc. in a coffeehouse style open mic. This event is a part of TransWeek, a week of events celebrating trans-identified people and gender variance and hosted by the student and community group, TransCollaborations. Monday, November 7th 4-9 pm Collaborative Art Project & Dance Party The UI LGBT Resource Center (125 Grand Avenue Ct) The student and community group TransCollaborations hopes that folks will stop in to the LGBT Resource Center sometime between 4 and 9pm and use art as a medium for exploring the question of what your gender identity means for you. This event is a part of TransWeek, which seeks to build community across groups and to engage in dialogue around how gender affects all of us. We celebrate any medium that you want to work within and will have some supplies available for your use. This
is a community building type of project and hope that ALL folks will feel welcome and supported in pitching in. This project will become a permanent installation at the LGBT Resource Center. Tuesday, November 8th 8-9:30pm Connections’ Transgender Panel/ Q&A Session Hotel Vetro (201 S. Linn St) The LGBT community organization Connections is proud to sponsor this panel and Q&A session as a part of the annual TransWeek events. Do you work with a transidentified person and have questions but don’t know how to ask them respectfully? Maybe you are a teacher and have a trans* student in your class but don’t know how to navigate being mindful of their experiences. Or perhaps you are simply interested in learning more about the great variety of people who are in the trans* community. Bring your questions and join Connections and TransCollaborations for this panel/Q&A session. Friday, November 11th 6-9pm Transcending the Wall 2 Art Exhibition Opening Reception The UI LGBT Resource Center (125 Grand Avenue Ct)
The student and community group, TransCollaborations, is proud to host Transcending the Wall 2: An Art Exhibition Exploring Gender Identities in conjunction with the annual TransWeek events. This is the second time we have hosted an art exhibition like this. This year we welcomed all folks to submit works of art that explore the broad topic of gender and identities. Please join us for our opening reception. Works will be on display until December 12th, 2011. Saturday, November 12th 2-5pm Intersections of Boxes & Bodies: A Dialogue Between Health Care Providers & Trans-Identified Individuals University Capitol Center, Room 2520D (201 S. Clinton St.) The student and community group TransCollaborations is facilitating a dialogue between health care providers and transidentified individuals addressing how to better meet the healthcare needs of trans* clients. This dialogue is open for everyone. Providers encouraged to attend and bring your ideas, questions, and experiences. Trans-identified folk are also encouraged to attend to share experiences within healthcare settings. This dialogue is a part of the annual TransWeek events.
Q: My daughter is in high school and recently came out. She’s been experiencing harassment from her classmates, and I’m worried this will affect her health and schoolwork. What can I do to help her? A: While your daughter deserves to feel safe and respected at school, it’s a distressing fact that 80 percent of lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT) students report having been harassed within the past year. Harassment and violence have terrible consequences: academic performance is often compromised, and LGBT students who are subjected to discrimination are at higher risk for depression and suicide. Here are some steps you can take to help your child: Support Your Child: It’s critical for LGBT children to know that their families love and support them. Despite misperceptions, LGBT people do not choose their sexual orientation and gender identity, and those characteristics have nothing to do with a person’s worth. Parents can also get support from organizations like PFLAG (202-467-8180). Know Your Child’s Rights: The U.S. Constitution guarantees all people–including your LGBT child–equal protection under the law, and state constitutions contain similar protections. In some states, schools are required to have nondiscrimination policies that include sexual orientation and gender identity/expression. But even if your state does not, local city ordinances and school district policies may do so. Lambda Legal has successfully gotten courts to agree that school-based discrimination against LGBT youth is legally unacceptable. Take Action: There are a number of
actions you can take to make sure your child is safe. •Create a safety plan with your child, which may include finding a safer way to get to and from school, arranging for someone to accompany your child and providing your child with money to use a public telephone or a cellular telephone. •Keep a written record about problems. Include dates, details about what happened, the people who were involved, where and when the incident took place, and whether there were any witnesses. •Report all harassment and abuse to the school principal as promptly as possible. Counselors and teachers you can trust may be helpful, but they generally are not legally required to take action to the same extent as the principal. •Put your reports and complaints in writing, and keep copies of all documents you send and receive. •If your child experiences serious threats or physical assault, contact your local police. •Beyond the support you provide your child, consider meeting with school faculty, staff and parents to discuss issues like safety, nondiscrimination and inclusive curricula. Iván Espinoza-Madrigal, Staff Attorney, National Headquarters Lamda Legal Iván Espinoza-Madrigal is a Staff Attorney for Lambda Legal, the oldest and largest national legal organization committed to achieving full recognition of the civil rights of lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, transgender people and people with HIV. Espinoza-Madrigal joined Lambda Legal in March 2011. Espinoza-Madrigal is devel-
oping an initiative on behalf of LGBT people of color, LGBT immigrants, and low-income LGBT communities. In this capacity, he will be expanding Lambda Legal’s work addressing the legal needs of LGBT and HIV-affected people who identify across intersecting lines of race, ethnicity and socio-economic class through litigation, public education, and policy advocacy. Before joining Lambda Legal, EspinozaMadrigal was a Staff Attorney with the Mexican American Legal Defense and Educational Fund (MALDEF) in San Antonio, Texas. At MALDEF, he litigated complex civil rights cases involving issues of first impression in federal courts, focusing primarily on the constitutional rights of immigrants. He served as counsel in Friendly House v. Whiting, a lawsuit challenging the constitutionality of Arizona’s immigration law, SB 1070, and handled MALDEF’s immigrants’ rights docket in Texas and eight other states in the Southwest. Espinoza-Madrigal was a member of the legal team that successfully defended the constitutionality of Section 5 of the Voting Rights Act in Northwest Austin Municipal Utility District No. 1 v. Holder, a landmark U.S. Supreme Court case. He also worked on numerous voting rights cases, including major challenges to Arizona’s and Georgia’s voter registration laws. Before joining MALDEF, EspinozaMadrigal worked with Fried, Frank, Harris, Shriver & Jacobson. At the firm, he successfully defended the municipal identification card of New Haven, Connecticut, against an attempt to dismantle the program. His work in New Haven had a direct impact on the implementation of
Sunday, November 13th 3-5pm TransWeek Film Screening & Discussion: She’s a Boy I Knew Iowa City Public Library, Room A (123 S. Linn St) TransWeek will end on Sunday, November 13th with a film screening and discussion. Using archival family footage, interviews, phone messages, and animation, Gwen Haworth’s documentary She’s a Boy I Knew begins in 2000 with Haworth’s decision to come out to his family about his gender identity. The resulting autoethnography is not only an exploration into the filmmaker’s process of transition from biological male to female, from Steven to Gwen, but also an emotionally charged account of the individual experiences, struggles, and stakes that her two sisters, mother, father, best friend and wife brought to Gwen’s transition. A discussion will follow the film screening. TransWeek 2011 was made possible by the generous support from: Chief Diversity Office; Connections; Emma Goldman Clinic; Executive Council of Graduate & Professional Students; GLBTAU; Student Health Services; The Carver College of Medicine Office of Cultural Affairs and Diversity Initiatives; The Department of Gender, Women’s, and Sexuality Studies; The UI LGBT Resource Center; UI Center for Human Rights; University of Iowa Student Government; Women’s Resource & Action Center
Ask Lambda Legal: Back to School by Ivan Espinoza-Madrigal
Ivan Espinoza-Madrigal Staff Attorney, Lambda Legal similar programs in cities across the country. Prior to joining the firm, he served as a law clerk for Judge Eric Clay in the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit, and for Judge Ronald Ellis in the U.S. District Court for the Southern District of New York. He received his JD from New York University School of Law, where he was a Root-TildenKern Sinsheimer Public Interest Scholar. He graduated summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa from the University of Pennsylvania, where he earned a BA in Political Science and Latin American Studies. He serves on the Board of Directors of the HIV Law Project. If you have any questions about your child’s rights, contact Lambda Legal at 866-542-8336 or visit lambdalegal.org/help.
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Flying while gay by Rev. Irene Monroe Southwest Airlines has issues. And those customer issues, on any given day or flight, appear arbitrary. For example, little did lead guitarist for the punk rock band Green Day Billie Joe Armstrong know that flying while wearing “saggy pants” can evict you off Southwest Airlines. This past Labor Day weekend, on Sept. 1, Armstrong was booted off a Southwest Airlines for “saggy pants.” When Armstrong, in disbelief, queried, “Don’t you have better things to do than worry about that?” The response from the flight attendant was curt and pointed: “Pull your pants up or you’re getting off the plane.” Another example: little did film director Kevin Smith know that flying while being oversized could also have you evicted off Southwest. In February 2010 Smith was removed from his Southwest seat because he was deemed too obese to fly safely, albeit he was able to put both armrests down in accordance with airlines policy. On the morning of Sept. 26 both Leisha Hailey, actress and musician known for her role as Alice Pieszecki in the Showtime Networks production “The L Word,” and, her girlfriend/bandmate Camila Grey of “Uh Huh Her,” boarded Southwest Airlines Flight 2274. Hailey and the band are preparing to launch a 21-city tour to promote breast cancer awareness. But little did Hailey and Grey know that kissing while flying could cause a kerfuffle with the airlines. Hailey and Grey, both incensed and humiliated, were escorted off the flight. Hailey immediately tweeted: “We were escorted off the plane for getting
upset about the issue. @SouthwestAir endorses homophobic employees. No one made her accountable.” But Southwest thought their action was justified. Several passengers on Flight 2274 complained that their display of affection with each other was objectionably inappropriate, “characterizing the behavior as excessive.” And Hailey tweeted that a “Flt. attendant said that it was a ’family’ airline and kissing was not ok.” With all the brouhaha about Hailey’s and Grey’s “excessive” and “inappropriate” smacking, of course, we all now want to know what kind of kiss was it to bring national attention to it. What category of kissing does theirs fall in the science of kissing called philematology? The Romans created three categories of kissing: 1) “Osculum,” a kiss on the cheek, 2) “Basium,” a kiss on the lips, and 3) “Savolium,” a deep kiss. “We want to make it clear we were not making out or creating any kind of spectacle of ourselves, it was one modest kiss,” Hailey’s written statement said. “We are responsible adult women who walk through the world with dignity. We were simply being affectionate like any normal couple.” How could “one modest kiss,” a Category 2, at best, on the Romans’ scale, cause such a kerfuffle? According to Southwest, their action was non-discriminatory and had everything to do with customer satisfaction. “Our crew, responsible for the comfort of all Customers on board, approached the passengers based solely on behavior and not gender. The conversation escalated to a level that was better resolved on
the ground, as opposed to in flight,” the airline said in a news release posted on its website. However, I like to know how many heterosexual couples have been or would be thrown off Southwest Airlines for kissing? Would it even be an issue? While their peck on the lips should be a non-issue—for passengers and Southwest—the elephant that weighed Flight 2274 down was homophobia. “No matter how quietly homophobia is whispered, it doesn’t make it any less loud,” Hailey’s statement said. “You can’t whisper hate. We ask this airline to teach their employees to not discriminate against any couple, ever, regardless of their own beliefs.” Southwest would say that they don’t discriminate. As a matter of fact, Southwest Airlines boasts that it is the official airlines for several of our national lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) organizations. “At Southwest Airlines, we take pride in our outreach and commitment to the GLBT community. We have community partnerships with a variety of local and national organizations who are dedicated to GLBT causes and initiatives. As an example, we are the official airline of the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD), the Gay-Straight Alliance Network (GSA), and the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC). We look forward to welcoming you onboard soon,” stated on its website. However, while you can do LGBTQ sensitivity trainings and alter laws in this country to do the right thing toward
Go, Chaz! (Gays on Reality TV) by Robert Hofmann We gays have filled so many slots—okay, not those kind of slots, you pig—so many casting slots on Reality TV that I have to wonder: where’s the beef (cake)? Where’s the lesbian you can cheer for? Where’s the gay you want to go all the way (with)? Oh, sure, there’s been a few hotties, a few upstanding boys and girls, but there have been more than a few stereotypes tossed in the salad (pun intended) that I have to wonder: why don’t we have our own great reality show? Survivor’s first winner, Richard Hatch, was an egomaniacal know-it-all who ran around naked: hardly someone you’d cheer for. And while Survivor did give us many gay contestants since that first season, can you remember any others? Todd Herzog, a cute 22 year old, won Survivor: China, and I know I cheered for him because, well, he was 22 AND cute. And Survivor gave us Ami Cusack on Vanuatu, but they portrayed her as man-hater. (She’s not. It’s just the way she came off.) While Reichen Lemkuhl and his thenpartner were cool to watch on The Amazing Race, Reichen’s current foray into reality, The A-List: New York, is like a Facts of Life reunion special. It’s horrible, but you just can’t look away. While it may be easy to root for some of the gays on American Idol, I don’t think you’d find many Clay Aiken downloads on your friends’ iPods. Or at least any who’d admit it. It’s easy to root for the boys on Project
Runway, but can’t any of those boys design something for me? Why does it always have to be a dress for Heidi Klum or a blouse for Michael Kors? Queer Eye was a great show, but they had to ruin it by bringing in “the straight guy.” Why couldn’t it have been Queer Eye for the Clueless Guy, and made them all gay? And of course, the reality show made specifically for gays, Boy Meets Boy, chapped my ass by making it a gay-guessing game and throwing in straight contestants that were like bombs in the playing field. “I pick him.” “Sorry, he’s straight. You lose.” And while RuPaul’s Drag Race is all fabulosity (which is seriously lacking at RuPaul’s Drag U), most of us can’t relate to having to put on make-up to go to work, stealing wigs from the fellow contestants, and tucking. Hell, we want to flaunt, not tuck. So where does that leave us? We still don’t have a reality show to call our own. Sure, we’ve got contestants everywhere, ‘cuz we are, Blanche, we are everywhere. But we need a show just for gays. Put a bunch of us in a house, ala Big Brother, see what happens. Put us in teams on an island to see if we can get off… the island, too. Logo, give us our own game show. In the meantime, we have a win-win situation on our hands. We’ve got both Carson Kressly (from Queer Eye) and Chaz Bono on Dancing with the Stars. And even though we have to
Robert Hofmann is the author of three books, “Surrounded by Insanity”, “An Ordinary Madness”, and his latest, “One Brain Cell Away from Retarded”. He resides in Wilton Manors, FL, with his partner of 16 years and welcomes email from his readers at robshof@aol.com. “play with the straights” on their shows, we can at least root for our own. GO CHAZ! GO CARSON! Show those heteros how it’s done! And in the meantime, we get to see Cher!
a disenfranchised segment of the population, we cannot always alter the hearts and attitudes of its citizens. For some of the passengers as well as Southwest’s fight crew, seeing two people of the same gender kissing is seen as a signed decree by the airlines sanctioning sexual depravity. And let’s not forget, that even in 2011, the “ick factor,” the revulsion some heterosexuals feel toward the way we LGBTQ people engage in social and sexual intimacy can still exist. Altering the individual hearts and minds of these folks will take a while, if not a lifetime. But Southwest Airlines serves the public. And they have to do it better. It is my hope that the next time when two kissing lesbians board one of their flights Southwest will not escort them off because they happen to be flying while gay.
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MINOR DETAILS us. It means sharing ourselves and paying attention to their reactions. It means building new friendships, acquaintances, and connections, and finding them meaningful. It means walking away from those that aren’t, without guilt and shame. It means learning more about ourselves in the interactions we have with all different kinds of people we meet in the process. And that means finding out who we are, how we react, and what we really want. It means living every event of our lives as the great adventure life can be, as a journey, not a planned tour, where around any corner could be a surprise. It means never having to worry about whether or where that adventure will end or about what its goal, should be. And when we live in the process of dating, no longer for some end, we’ll be able to experience it as a successful, worthwhile journey. Should more come out of it, that will just be another happy surprise. Robert N. Minor, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus of Religious Studies at the University of Kansas, is author of When Religion Is an Addiction; Scared Straight: Why It’s So Hard to Accept Gay People and Why It’s So Hard to Be Human and Gay & Healthy in a Sick Society. Contact him at www.FairnessProject.org.
NOVEMBER 2011
Section 3: Community
ACCESSline Page 39