The ACCESSline, The Heartland's LGBT+ Newspaper, August 2013, Volume 27, No. 8

Leslie Jordan: No One Trick Pony Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme

Leslie Jordan may be a “Show Pony” but he definitely has more than one trick. Actor on stage and screen, author, playwright, and all around snappy dresser, Jordan has a sharp wit and humor to match. Every question has an answer with a story, Jordan talks about his new show, the change Leslie Jordan he’s seen in LGBT equality, special roles, and why he feels no one should envy playing a role on Star Trek. Jordan was the winner of the

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Heartland News Suicide at Polk High School AJ Betts is the fifth student from Southeast Polk High school to commit suicide in the past five years.His mother stated that AJ was outed at school a year and a half ago, and stated that, “Everyone got a long with my son very well until they found out he was gay.” Moore further contributed AJ’s suicide to his being bullied at school for being gay, half African-American, and because he was born with a cleft lip.

Iowa DPH denying same-sex parents accurate birth certificates

Despite a previous ruling from the Iowa Supreme Court in the case Gartner v. Newton, the Iowa Department of Public Health is still refusing to immediately issue accurate birth certificates for all children born to married lesbian parents.

The Gartner case was decided unanimously in May of this year by the Iowa Supreme Court as part of a Lambda Legal lawsuit challenging the Iowa Department of Public Health’s refusal to issue an accurate birth certificate to MacKenzie, daughter of married same-sex couple Heather

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Sexual Health in The Kinsey Sicks Rural Communities Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme

by Angela Geno-Stumme

When it comes to sexual health, testing for HIV and STIs is an important part of every sexually active individual’s life. However, testing can be difficult for people in rural communities compared to those living in or near larger cities. Paul Whannel talks about the impact of HIV and STI testing for rural LGBT individuals and communities. While Deb Peterson discusses the options of small and large Planned Parenthood of the Heartland Health Centers.

Paul Whannel

Advisor to Midwestern AIDS Project.

What difficulties can people run into when looking for HIV/STI testing in rural communities?

Rural communities are a huge challenge for HIV/STI testing among high-risk individuals, especially gay and bi men. Many aren’t comfortable sharing information with the medical professionals they visit, and many don’t regularly visit medical professionals at all, particularly younger people. As most rural communities have abso-

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“Boystown” A Journey to Oz

A capella, satire, comedy, and drag are combined with hilarious success in the quartet the Kinsey Sicks. Discovered at a Bette Midler concert dressed as the Andrews sisters, the Kinsey Sicks have twenty years of performance as America’s Favorite DragaThe Kinsey Sicks from left to right: pella Beautyshop Rachel, Trampolina, Trixie, and Winnie. Quartet. Their performances include their Off-Broadway hit “DRAGAPELLA! Starring the Kinsey Sicks” at Studio 54, and an extended run at the Las Vegas Hilton. They have recorded six CDs and have been featured in two feature films. In addition to making people

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Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme TT page 11

What’s Inside:

Section 1: News & Politics

Advertising rates 3 Brown for Cedar Rapids City Council by A Geno-Stumme 4 From the Heartland by Donna Red Wing 5 Remarkables by Jonathan Wilson 5 Iowan Advocacy by Tami Haught 6 Just Sayin’ by Beau Fodor 6 Shrink Rap by Loren A Olson MD 7 Warren’s Words by Warren J. Blumenfeld 7 Northwest Iowa: My little corner of the world

by D. Raymond Wetherell 8 Simple Gifts by Tony Dillon-Hansen 8 Minor Details by Robert Minor 9 Looking past DOMA by Anthony Brown 10 In the Name of Religion by Rev. Irene Monroe 10 The Project of the Quad Cities 10 Transformations Iowa Meeting 10

Section 2: Fun Guide

Entertainment Picks for the Month 11 “Boystown” A Journey to Oz by A Geno-Stumme 11 Inside Out by Ellen Krug 12 PFLAG - Des Moines Chapter Meeting 12 New GOglbt Business Referral Group 12 Wired This Way by Rachel Eliason 13 Honor Your Body, Honor You by Davey Wavey 13 Iowa’s Gay Weddings by Scott Stevens 16 Dovesland Creations Adds Personal Flair by Geno-Stumme 16 NKOB: Boys Will be Boys 21 The Bookworm Sez by Terri Schlichenmeyer 22 Comics and Crossword Puzzle 22-23 Outstanding Leaders Advocacy Ad 24

Section 3: Community

From the Pastor’s Pen by Rev. Jonathan Page 25 Prime Timers of Central Iowa 25 PITCH Calendar 2013 25 Warren’s Words by Warren J. Blumenfeld 26 Ask Lambda Legal By Susan Sommer 26 Business Directory 28-29 I.C. Kings: Long, Hot Summer 32 Finding and Defining Sexual Morality by Jonathan Wilson 32 LGBTQ Patient & Family Education and Support Groups 33 ALPHAS 34

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AUGUST 2013

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Section 1: News & Politics SScontinued from page 1

HEARTLAND NEWS and Melissa Gartner. Iowa’s highest court ruled in favor of the Gartners, stating that the Iowa Department of Public Health would have to change its practice of refusing to issue accurate birth certificates listing both mothers.

Instead, same-sex married couples are being told by the Iowa Department of Public Health that they must follow an affidavit process and obtain certified copies of their marriage license before accurate birth certificates can be issued. These requirements do not apply to non-gay Iowa families.

Ottumwa’s “The Laramie Project” to be an independent production

Now that leaders at Ottumwa High School have canceled plans for a fall student production of “The Laramie Project”, the school’s drama teacher has said the show must go on. Natalie Saunders has recruited local theater director Dale Dommer — with many of her students — to perform the play at the city’s performing arts center. The now independent play is set for October at the Bridge View Center.

Iowa Forum Mobilizes Evangelicals to Politics

Founder of the American Renewal Project David Lane spent $250,000 to underwrite a two-day forum for 800 Iowa evangelicals. The clergy and their wives were treated to an all-expenses paid event in Des Moines featuring U.S. Senators Rand Paul of Kentucky and Ted Cruz of Texas.

Pastors were urged to mobilize and advocate political action in Iowa churches, in addition to holding voter registration drives

ACCESSline Page 3

this September.

Donna Red Wing had this to say: I can’t help but get a little nervous whenever an anti-equality leader like David Lane describes his programming as a weapon given to him by God. It also makes me nervous when someone like Lane has millions of dollars to spend, working against LGBT Americans and against women’s rights to reproductive health. He says that he wants to “re-establish a Christian culture,” but it’s unclear exactly what this would look like.

Most troubling of all, I am concerned that he will continue to rail against the first amendment, which states clearly, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof…”

ment Non-Discrimination Act. This bill renews our nation’s historic commitment to the advancement of civil rights and to the American ideal of a meritocracy in which people are judged on their talent, ability, and qualifications—not by the color of their skin, their religion, their gender, their national origin, their age, whether they have a disability, their sexual orientation, or their gender identity. I am working to bring ENDA to a vote before the full Senate at the soonest possible date, and I am hopeful that we can pass it on a bipartisan basis, just as we did in committee.

HELP Senate Committee Passes ENDA

Findings from a recent survey suggest that fear of prosecution under the law may lead trans people living with HIV (PLHIV) to avoid testing and treatment at disproportionately high rates. The National HIV Criminalization Survey, released by the Sero Project and the Transgender Law Center last week, found that 58% of transgender and third sex-identified PLHIV saw fear of prosecution as a reason to avoid testing, 61% saw it as a reason to avoid disclosure of one’s HIV status to sexual partners, and 48% saw it as a reason to avoid treatment.

The survey revealed some telling attitudes towards disclosure laws, which are laws implemented in many states requiring people living with HIV to reveal their HIV-positive status to others, or face punishment.

Transgender people living with HIV were even less likely to trust the court system, and only 15% of transgender people living with HIV believe that a person with HIV would receive a fair hearing by the criminal justice system. In addition, they signify that disclosure laws present significant barriers to testing and treatment for trans and gender non-conforming people.

On July 10, the Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor and Pensions (HELP), chaired by Sen. Harkin, passed the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA), a bill that would prohibit employers from firing, refusing to hire, or discriminating against those employed or seeking employment on the basis of their perceived or actual sexual orientation or gender identity. Such protections are already in place prohibiting discrimination based on race, religion, gender, national origin, age, and disability, and have made the United States a better, fairer, and more equal nation. The vote on ENDA marked the first time that any congressional committee has passed a bill prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity.

Senator Harkin stated: It is time, once and for all, to prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. And I am proud that the HELP Committee has taken the lead by passing, on a bipartisan basis, the Employ-

Trans PLHIV More Likely to Avoid Treatment

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ACCESSline Page 4 SScontinued from page 1

SEXUAL HEALTH lutely no form of outreach testing, highrisk individuals must specifically seek out testing services. That commonly provokes anxiety even among low-risk individuals.

Too many people aren’t even ‘out’ to their doctors, a sign that trust is lacking. People need to understand that anxiety is normal and that they shouldn’t feel ashamed or demonized for seeking such services—in fact, they should be applauded.

What difficulties do organizations have in providing HIV/STI testing in rural communities?

It’s nearly impossible to pull into a small town with a mobile testing clinic— who wants to be the first to step up in front of their whole community? Being from a small town myself, I can say most everyone knows each other’s business. At least it feels that way.

Local organizations have had some successes with partnering with colleges, but that only reaches a certain group in certain communities. It’d be wonderful if we could work more closely with high schools, but that’s quite controversial.

Most often, our best success is reaching rural people who come to bigger metro areas to socialize, but that isn’t a real solution to the whole problem. This is a barrier no one has figured out how to fix.

What suggestions do you have for individuals looking for HIV/STI testing in rural communities?

Be honest with your doctor or other medical providers. They’re not there to judge you, even if you’re feeling scared or guilty. They’re there to help. Sometimes you have to vocalize your concerns and that can be difficult, whether or not you feel you have symptoms or think you’ve been exposed. Anyone who is sexually active should make HIV and STI testing part of their routine. Once a year at minimum is a good suggestion, but some people should be tested more often. Sure it’s a bit of a drag to schedule that appointment and come in. But when it’s over, I can see the relief on people’s faces. Twenty minutes of your time for that kind of relief?

It’s an easy choice to make.

Can you discuss what difficulties the LGBT community may have when looking for HIV/STI testing?

Shame and fear are the two biggest

Section 1: News & Politics perceived threats—so many people coming in for a test think they’re going to get a lecture or dirty looks. In reality, it’s the opposite. Whenever someone comes in asking for services, agencies in the area consider them to be responsible individuals looking out for their heath and the health of their partners. Maybe it’s been a couple of years since your last test. We don’t say, “Why weren’t you here earlier?” We say, “We’re glad you came in, pat yourself on the back.” That’s when people open up.

As I mentioned earlier, honesty is a big part of this as well. That same shame and fear leads people to tell counselors what they think they want to hear. If there’s drug use, binge drinking, unprotected sex, or other risk factors, we need to know it to help make a plan to keep you safer. I promise, whatever you think you need to hide, we’ve heard it all. It’s not going to shock us and we’re not going to brow-beat you.

What do you hope to see in the future, in regards to HIV/STI testing?

I hope we establish more trust in the community so people aren’t anxious about being tested for HIV/STDs. That means tackling stigma and having the serious conversations that need to be had. I hope we find new ways to draw attention to this issue that aren’t all doom-and-gloom because that turns people off. I hope more young people realize the surge in STDs in their age group means they’re at risk and need to seek services. I hope more rural doctors pay attention to this issue. Most of all, though, I hope there comes a day when we’re not needed at all. Until then, we’re here for you—and we’re on your side.

Brown for Cedar Rapids City Council Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme

They’re not there to judge you, even if you’re feeling scared or guilty. They’re there to help.

Deb Peterson

Planned Parenthood of the Heartland, Creston Health Center Manager.

Finding HIV/STI testing can be difficult for individuals in rural communities, what is the difference in testing between small and large centers?

HIV/STI testing is available at all of our health centers, in every community we serve. Our goal is to make it as easy as possible for people to receive timely, confidential care that is close to home. All of our testing is private, and our staff is trained to be sensitive to our patients’ needs and concerns. We also provide comprehensive

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AUGUST 2013

Anthony Brown Cedar Rapids has the opportunity to have its first openly gay City Council Member with Anthony Brown running for a seat this fall. Brown, a graduate of Jefferson High, has invested himself in many local and state organizations, boards, and committees.

He has served on the Board of Directors for Access Iowa and on the Initial Board of Directors for ImpactCR. He was an Event Coordinator for Floodstock ’08, the Affirmative Action Chair for the Linn County Democratic Party, the Lead Coordinator for previous Cedar Rapids Pride Festivals, Event Coordinator for the 2012 Festival Latino

de Cedar Rapids, and former President for the Cedar Rapids Gay & Lesbian Resource Center. Currently, he works at the non-profit organization Diversity Focus as Community Engagement & Development Manager and Fellow for the LGBT Community for Diversity Focus.

What influenced you to run for City Council in Cedar Rapids, Iowa?

I see the need in our Community for a fresh perspective and a willingness to work with residents and businesses to continue making Cedar Rapids into a vibrant and thriving community for all. I’ve lived in Cedar Rapids since ’99 and I have been involved in activities for this community at nearly every level (i.e. CR Pride, Festival Latino de Cedar Rapids, CR Blue Zones Project, etc…).

Connecting businesses, people, organizations, and communities within Cedar Rapids and the surrounding area, to each other, and back into the community—is a passion of mine. Overall the influences of collaboration, connectivity, being a servant leader, and community building, are influencing my run to serve on Cedar Rapids City Council.

If elected this November, how do you feel about being the first openly LGBT City Council Member for Cedar Rapids, Iowa?

I’d feel great honestly. While I do not let one aspect of who I am define me, I see the need to be a positive role model not only to LGBT Youth, but to the community at large

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Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

ACCESSline Page 5

From the Heartland by Donna Red Wing, Executive Director One Iowa Untangling the Post-DOMA Issues

On June 26th, the Supreme Court of the United States struck down a key section of the so-called Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as unconstitutional. Now what?

What does this historical victory mean for legally married same-gender couples in Iowa? What does it mean for loving and committed couples across this nation?

Clearly the ruling is an extraordinary step forward in our struggle for the freedom to marry but it does not grant a national constitutional right to marry. In states where same-gender couples can legally marry, the ruling adds all of the federal rights and benefits of marriage to those couples.

Let’s look at what we can celebrate.

Bi-national couples will have all of the rights of their heterosexual counterparts. For the nearly 30,000 gay and lesbian bi-national couples this means that there can be legal application to bring spouses and fiancées to the United States, ending the separation of couples whose marriages were not recognized. To put it simply, these couples will be able to apply for and be considered for green cards.

For Iowans, and those living in marriage equality states, same-gender married couples will, for the first time, legally file joint federal income tax returns. In the past, Iowans would file an Iowa State tax return based on a ‘make-believe’ joint federal return. Then a separate and real federal return, indicating individual status, would

be filed. These couples will be eligible to collect Social Security, including survivor benefits. These married couples would, most probably, no longer pay income tax and employment taxes on benefits, including health insurance, provided by an employer to a spouse.

There are more than 1100 rights and benefits that will now be available to legally married same gender couples, including: income tax, veterans’ benefits, Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, estate tax, immigration rights, bankruptcy laws, public employee benefits, military spousal benefits and the Family Medical Leave Act. That is the good news.

But it is complicated. Will the state where the marriage occurred or the state of residence be recognized for these benefits? If you were married in Iowa and you live in Iowa, there is no question. But what if you live in Florida, drive up to Iowa to get married, and then go home to the Sunshine State. Florida does not recognize marriage.

Are you married or not in Florida? And what about the states that recognize but will not perform same-gender marriage?

Or, what if a legally married Iowa couple crosses the border into Nebraska for a vacation? We joke that once you cross that line, you are divorced for as long as you are outside of Iowa. But what if there is a medical emergency? What if the rights and benefits are needed in a life and death situation? What happens outside of Iowa?

Every same gender married couple needs to ask these questions. We need to call our legislators and ask for answers. We

need to make sure that the courts are well prepared both in numbers of justices and reflective diversity on the bench. The District of Columbia Circuit Court will hear many of the cases that stream out of the DOMA ruling.

And that court is down three justices.

We need to speak with our attorneys, our advocates and make decisions accordingly. And, I think, we need to take matters into our own hands.

Just this weekend my fiancée and I made a decision to create the documents we would need if we took even a day trip to Nebraska, Missouri or Illinois. We found that there was an app for that! We went to mydirectives.com and in about half an hour created the electronic documents we would need in an emergency or end of life situation. From medical needs to personal needs, we were able to make our decisions and wishes known. This particular product is free of charge, HIPPA compliant, digital and portable. Creating our documents was a profound experience, forcing us to think about, talk about and make known our medical, emergency and end of life decisions.

In Iowa, we are fortunate. Our decisions need to be based on the fact that we do have all of the rights and benefits of any other couple, as long as we stay in Iowa, as long as we maintain the right to marry and as long as we continue to educate ourselves around the shifting policies around the freedom to marry. Maybe. We need to ask how our families will be recognized especially around parental rights and adoption. And we need to know what happens when we cross the Iowa border.

For others, particularly those who live in states that prohibit marriage, it continues to be challenging. The battle we won in the highest court in the land must now be won

accountability of the simple majority. As it is now, the majority can always excuse their failure to advance their agenda for governance by demonizing and blaming the minority unless and until the majority has a 60-vote super-majority. That is less likely to happen, and losing majority status entirely is also less likely to happen, if each side when in the majority can still point the accountability finger at the minority.

So, how would changing the rules increase accountability? Simple. It’s a matter of giving the misguided enough rope to hang themselves. If a simple majority can pass legislation, the chance increases that the adopted policies will go into effect and either succeed or fail. If they succeed, the likelihood increases that voters will want more of that kind of vision and leadership and more candidates of that majority party will be elected. But, if the adopted policies fail or fall short of expectations, the voters will be able to see who was responsible for the failure and can vote accordingly to throw the bums out of office.

Changing the rules doesn’t have to eliminate the filibuster and the need for a

super-majority to cut off debate. Both could remain. Simply eliminating treatment of the filibuster threat as the real thing would be a tremendous step in the right direction. If some senator, for the sake of drawing attention to a particularly misguided legislative initiative, wants to filibuster, more power to him/her.

Have at it and televise it. That senator can go (no pun intended), limited only by bladder capacity or an actual super-majority willing to cut off further debate.

The most serious flaw in the current rules is the treatment of a mere filibuster threat as if it were the real thing. Its most pernicious manifestation is the singlesenator-secret-hold on executive branch nominees, which is the ultimate in reciprocal back scratching.

Those who want to delay governance decisions can do so for principle or publicity, but they should have to work for it. If they want to carry water for something of particular importance to them, let them carry it in their bladders. In the final analysis, a vote can be had, a simple majority can decide, and that simple majority can be properly assigned credit or blame for the outcomes.

But what if there is a medical emergency? What if the rights and benefits are needed in a life and death situation? What happens outside of Iowa?

Remarkables by Jonathan Wilson Keeping the Filibuster Real

It’s time to change the filibuster rules of the United States Senate. It’s time to break down some of the hurdles to effective government. It’s time for greater accountability. A filibuster rules change will serve all of those laudable ends.

How so? Currently, the mere threat of a filibuster is treated as if it were the real thing. It takes 60 votes to get past the mere threat. That’s a little like kowtowing to the kid who threatens to hold his breath until he turns blue, when you should be saying, “Go ahead, make my day.”

To be fair, those in the majority have been reluctant to change the rules, given the near certainty that someday in the future that majority will be the minority again. Under the current rules the minority retains considerable power to influence legislation since there have been rare occasions when a majority held a 60-vote super-majority. Looking then to the future, the majority wants, even in minority status, to retain some power and influence over legislative action. The current rules allow the minority to do that and thwart the will of the simple majority. That superficially far-sighted rationale is actually near sighted. It actually inhibits the majority from becoming an even greater majority (or losing its majority status altogether).

Why? Because the rules diminish the

Donna Red Wing is the Executive Director of One Iowa. She served as Executive Director of Grassroots Leadership, as Chief of Staff at Interfaith Alliance, she was a member of the Obama’s kitchen cabinet on LGBT concerns, and was Howard Dean’s outreach liaison to the LGBT communities. Red Wing was the first recipient of the Walter Cronkite Award for Faith & Freedom. Red Wing serves on the national board of the Velvet Foundation, which is building the national LGBT museum in Washington, DC. Contact Donna at OneIowa.org or donna@oneiowa.org. person-by-person, county-by-county and state-by-state.

The civil rights battle of the 21st century is not yet won. We are winning but we still have a great deal more to do. We need to move forward with our eyes wide open; continue to pay attention, speak to our policy makers, become advocates, support our community groups, consult with our tax experts and attorneys, explore medical and end of life directives, and do everything we can to make the most of the DOMA ruling.

And, from time to time we should simply stop for a moment and celebrate, just celebrate, how far we have come.

So, how would changing the rules increase accountability? Simple.

It’s a matter of giving the misguided enough rope to hang themselves.

Jonathan Wilson is an attorney at the Davis Brown Law Firm in Des Moines, and chairs the First Friday Breakfast Club (ffbciowa.org), an educational, non-profit corporation for gay men in Iowa who gather on the first Friday of every month to provide mutual support, to be educated on community affairs, and to further educate community opinion leaders with more positive images of gay men.

It is the largest breakfast club in the state of Iowa. He can be contacted at JonathanWilson@DavisBrownLaw.com.

ACCESSline Page 6

Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

Iowan Advocacy by Tami Haught 20 Years, Coming Full Circle

This article is going to be more on the personal side—this month on August 23rd I will be recognizing the 20th year I have been diagnosed with HIV. I never imagined on August 23, 1993 that I would still be alive in 2013. I knew very little about HIV and yet was suddenly immersed in something that I never believed would happen to me, like everyone else HIV/AIDS was something that happened to other people. I was unaware of criminalization laws and certainly didn’t think they would have any impact on my life.

Having led the efforts to modernize Iowa’s HIV specific law for the last year, I still didn’t realize my personal experience with the law. I started advocating for change because the law is ineffective and further stigmatizes PLWHA and discourages testing and treatment.

I was reminded of my personal experience when I visited a friend who was in the adult mental health floor at the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics. Roger, my late husband, was admitted to the ward

17 years ago after having a mental break down. Walking down the hall and past the room he was in was like being slammed against a brick wall, which shocked me I wasn’t ready for those feelings to come flooding back.

Roger was admitted 3 months after we were married, I talked him into staying in Iowa rather than moving back to Texas, knowing we would get better medical treatments here. What I didn’t realize was the internal struggle he was having. I hadn’t told my family that I was diagnosed HIV+ and Roger had AIDS with a t-cell count of 12. Roger feared that once they found out about our diagnosis that my family would talk me into charging him of criminal transmission and he would spend the rest of his life in prison.

The thought of calling the police and charging Roger under 709C never entered my mind, I never would have charged him, nor would my family have asked me. One, I

wasn’t sure about the law, and two, I never blamed Roger for being infected with HIV. I took responsibility that I had put myself at risk for HIV, by not protecting myself, I acquired HIV, Roger did not transmit it.

We hadn’t had the conversation before we engaged in sex and didn’t use protection.

The 2 things needed to protect oneself.

But walking down the hallway in the hospital, it finally hit me; I am also fighting for Roger to modernize the law, not just all the other Iowans who have been so negatively impacted by it. It always amazes me what triggers a memory, the hallway certainly was for me.

I now have even more reason to fight to get this bad law modernized.

Originally, put on the books with good intentions, we now know that the law is having the opposite effect keeping people from being tested and treated, fearing the stigma and discrimination PLWHA face daily.

with 150 guests (and a Mariachi band) at The Capitol Room, filling themselves on some of the best Iowa-infused cuisine and wines I have ever tasted from Tasteto-Go catering, and the cake from Cache was to die for!

“After being together with my partner (now husband) since December 7, 2001, we both felt it was time to make a formal commitment to each other. When we started our journey back on August 30, 2012, we had an idea on what we wanted to do for our ceremony, which was to infuse American and Mexican traditions into our wedding ceremony and reception. Our first excursion on August 30, 2012, to Des Moines, Iowa, was filled with meeting many vendors and beginning the initial planning process of the two day wedding.

With every vendor we met, there was an instant connection. We made two more excursions prior to the wedding, one in late March and one over Memorial weekend. Every time we visited, the vendors always made us feel very comfortable and accepted and they would even go beyond expectations to help us with questions that had nothing to do with the services they were going to provide for our wedding.

When our wedding finally arrived, every one of those vendors, together, helped create a beautiful, memorable, and high quality ceremony and reception.

Enrique and I are finally

married, after being together for 11 ½ years, and we are very grateful to all of our vendors, but also to the city of Des Moines, Iowa, for helping Enrique and I be able to have some of the same rights that heterosexual married couples have.

“Jeffrey and I knew that we wanted to be married years ago; our original plan was to do it in Mexico City where gay marriage is legal on a Federal Level. Every gay couple has the same rights across the country, not like in the United States where the word equality is not completely embraced by some segments of our society. However due to the violence in Mexico at the time of our decision and concerns about the safety of our guests, it made us look more closer to home in the state of Iowa (the only Midwest state where gay marriage was legalized at the time when we were looking for a place to get married), and the capital and city of Des Moines was our first choice. What a surprise we had when we visited the vendors that made possible to have my dream wedding.

They were open-minded and I felt very welcomed and comfortable with the hospitality wherever we went and talked about the reason of our trip. After eleven plus years together, it was important for us to seal our commitment of love and trust that we had built to each other in the presence of God, our friends, family, and guests. As a gay Latino man I wanted to show the Latin community that we gay Latinos are just like everyone else; we are people that have the right to love and share our life with the person we love and share the rest of our lives with. Thankfully the people of

We hadn’t had the conversation before we engaged in sex and didn’t use protection. The 2 things needed to protect oneself.

Just Sayin’ by Beau Fodor Latin Equality in the LGBT Community

Enrique and Jeffrey’s wedding party.

Courtesy of Maxheim Photography.

MaxheimPhoto.com On a lighter note, last month, June, brought my first Mexican Couple to be married in Iowa with a wedding party of 40 from Acapulco. The wedding party took over the entire Valley West Inn. They did a full Spa Day at Sahar’s, a bachelor party at the Garden, then after a wedding morning Brunch (with Creme Cupcake & Desserts doughnuts), had a fairytale ceremony in the Des Moines’s Art Center Rose Garden and partied the night away

“As a gay Latino man I wanted to show the Latin community that we gay Latinos are just like everyone else; we are people that have the right to love and share our life with the person we love and share the rest of our lives with.”

Tami Haught has been living with HIV for almost 20 years. She is the CHAIN Community Organizer, President for PITCH, and new member of the SERO Project Board of Directors. Tami started speaking out about her HIV status when her son started school hoping that providing education and facts would make life easier for her son, by fighting the stigma, discrimination, isolation, and criminalization people living with HIV/AIDS face daily. Contact info: tami. haught2012@gmail.com website: www.pitchiowa.com

Beau Fodor is the owner of PANACHE, an Iowa event and wedding planner who focuses specifically on weddings for the LGBT community. He can be reached at his blog www.panachepoints.com.

Photo courtesy of Toby Schuh Photography.

Minnesota voted for the right thing to do and now Jeffrey and I will have some (not all) of the rights the heterosexual married couples have.” ~Jeffrey and Enrique.

These Grooms, and more importantly the family and their community they brought to Iowa, left a lasting impression on me. During the toasts, things got very emotional and quite serious with talk of immigration reform, fear of retribution and homophobia in Mexico, and of course, Latino equality in the LGBT community, which to be honest, I was somewhat ignorant about. And as I am already planning another couple’s nuptials, this time from Cancun, you can be assured I’ll be working on my Spanish so I can feel more a part of their wedding, instead of just being the planner. They made me feel like family and that’s what I try to do in return for my Brides and Grooms, because in this industry... that is what it’s all about.

Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

ACCESSline Page 7

Shrink Rap by Loren A Olson MD Dr. Olson, One year ago my husband told me he’d contracted an STD from his male lover.

Honesty about his bisexuality has made our sex life the best since our early marriage.

I found his ex-lover’s number in his cell phone a few days ago under a different name. Am I fooling myself into thinking we can have any trust? Guess I’m not worth it. I don’t want to be lied to anymore. How can I make him come to terms with his sexuality?

Feeling Betrayed Dear Feeling Betrayed, First, my heart goes out to you and all the men and women who find themselves having an unfaithful spouse, whether gay/ bi/straight.

It is my belief that the damage to your relationship is not because of what has happened sexually; it is from the undermining of the trust that was there before.

Lies are the true infidelity in a relationship.

It is clear that even though things had improved since hearing the news a year ago, you still don’t trust him. Going through his cell phone is pretty clear evidence for that.

After being betrayed once, you are trying to protect yourself from being hurt again.

After his confession, what was his commitment to you?

All relationships have rules, and they are not the same for every couple. Some heterosexual couples have “open” relation-

ships as well as gay/bi couples. The rules must be negotiated early in a relationship.

Those rules can be changed and renegotiated; however, they must not be renegotiated unilaterally as they were in your case. Simply agreeing for a “non-monogamous” relationship is not enough. The rules also must state the degree of honesty about extra-marital/spousal relationships. For example, will it be “Don’t ask, don’t tell?” or will it require full disclosure. YOU must be the one to establish what your own limits are within your own values.

Your husband’s behavior has nothing to do with your value as a person nor does it imply that he does not love you. Many men who have sex with men are not just living a heterosexual life in response to social pressures; many do love their wives and children, and don’t want to let go of any of that.

Yet we are driven by inner feelings that are not always rational. We operate from rational thinking only about 1% of the time, even though we believe that we are always doing so. Your husband’s rational mind may have made a commitment to you that he has found difficult to keep.

You must let go of the idea that you can “make him come to terms with his sexuality.”

That is something over which you have no control. But you must come to terms with your response to this and you do have some

control over that. Are you willing to share your husband sexually even if his primary loyalty always remains with you?

I would encourage you not to ask “why” questions. For one thing, he probably can’t tell you why. Also, questions that begin with, “Why….” typically push the other person into a defensive position and may induce more lying as a way to defend himself.

Simply tell him the fact: “I know it is wrong but I was looking through your cell phone because I find it difficult to trust you, and I found your lovers phone number with a different name.” You have simply stated the facts. Then let him respond—or not. But you must be honest with him if you expect honesty in return.

One final note: Given the uncertainty of this situation, if you continue to have sex with your husband, you must insist that he use a condom. He certainly owes you that. I am convinced that the drive that has pushed him to sex with a man has not gone away. Chances are good that this lover was not his only sexual contact. You should also be tested for all STDs on a regular basis.

Perhaps to improve your level of trust, the two of you might go together to get tested and receive some safe sex counseling.

Your situation isn’t hopeless, but it is difficult, and it will continue to be so for quite some time. Trust, once damaged, is difficult to restore, but it is possible. It will require honesty on both your parts and behavior that is confined to the rules that

than on the basis of gender.

To paraphrase the Bard, discrimination by any other name would still stink.

Fundamentally, the Iowa Supreme Court is placing responsibility on women for the libidinous drives of their male employers.

This blatantly falls under the category of “blaming the victim,” just as accusing a woman for a man raping her because she was dressed attractively.

“Sexism” I define as the overarching system of advantages bestowed on males.

It is prejudice and discrimination based on sex, especially against females and intersex people, and is founded on a patriarchal structure of male dominance promoted through individual/ interpersonal, institutional, and social/ cultural systems.

Throughout history, examples abound of male domination over the rights and lives of women. Men have denied women the vote and their reproductive freedoms until women fought back and demanded the rights of political enfranchisement and legal access to contraception and abortion; strictly enforced gender-based social roles mandated without choice that women’s only option was to remain in the home to undertake cleaning and childcare duties; women were and continue by far to be the primary targets of harassment, abuse, physical assault, and rape by men; women were locked out of most professions; rules required that women teachers relinquish their jobs after marriage; in

fact, the institution of marriage itself was structured on a foundation of male dominance with men serving as the so-called “head of the household” and taking on sole ownership of all property thereby withholding these rights from women. In other words, women have been constructed as second-class and even third-class citizens, as targets, but through it all, women as a group have challenged the inequities and have pushed back against patriarchal constraints.

I often hear men and even some women claim that sexism is a thing of the past, that women have achieved the equality that was once denied them, that we live in a system of meritocracy where one’s success in life is based solely on merit, work ethic, motivation, and abilities, rather than on our social identities or the stations of life to which we are born.

Though females stand as the numerical majority in the United States and many countries throughout the world, we must not confuse majority in terms of numbers with dominance in terms of social power. For example, though black Africans numbered as the vast majority under the corrupt apartheid system in South Africa, white South Africans held the social power to invoke and maintain, for many years, their oppressive control.

While women’s annual salaries have grown over the past decades, and while many studies indicate that women have fared somewhat better during the current

Lies are the true infidelity in a relationship.

Warren’s Words by Warren J. Blumenfeld Sexist Iowa Court Ruling Reinstates Blame on Woman for Being Too Irresistible

I thought I had heard of most of the attempted and manifested means of patriarchal control and domination over women’s bodies and minds, until news hit of a court ruling in my former home state of Iowa, handed down first last December, and then on appeal, reinstated July 12, 2013. The state’s Supreme Court, composed entirely of men, voted unanimously each time that dentist, James Knight, was acting within his legal rights to terminate Melissa Nelson, a tenyear member of his staff, to preserve his marriage. During the trials, Knight never charged Nelson with conducting herself improperly or unprofessionally in any way.

He never charged that she flirted or acted in a sexually suggestive manner, though on occasion she exchanged some non-sexual personal text messages. Nelson stated that she regarded her 53-year old employer as a “father figure.”

Knight’s wife came across the texts, and, afterwards, the couple went to their pastor for advice, who then approved of their decision to dismiss Nelson. The “justices” ruled in December and reiterated again that bosses can fire employees they view as an “irresistible attraction.”

Such terminations fall within legal bounds according to the author of the decision, “Justice” Edward Mansfield, since they are motivated by feelings and emotions rather

“Sexism” I define as the overarching system of advantages bestowed on males.

Loren A. Olson MD is a board certified psychiatrist in the clinical practice of psychiatry for over 35 years. Dr. Olson has conducted research on mature gay and bisexual men for his book, Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight, a Psychiatrist’s Own Story. He has presented on this subject at conferences across the United States and Internationally. His blog, MagneticFire. com, has a strong following among mature gay and bisexual men. He established Prime Timers of Central Iowa, a social organization for mature gay/bisexual men. For more information go to FinallyOutBook.com or contact him on Facebook.com. you have established together.

I have lived your life from your husband’s point of view, but I have been blessed that my former wife has moved on and has come to understand my struggle. I have also come to understand how much I hurt her. Fortunately, through developing this understanding of each other, we have come to a point of forgiveness.

Warren J. Blumenfeld is author of Warren’s Words: Smart Commentary on Social Justice (Purple Press); editor of Homophobia: How We All Pay the Price (Beacon Press), and co-editor of Readings for Diversity and Social Justice (Routledge) and Investigating Christian Privilege and Religious Oppression in the United States (Sense). www.warrenblumenfeld.com economic recession, reports indicate that women continue to make substantially less than their male counterparts when performing similar jobs. For example, the U.S. Department of Labor found that women overall make approximately 77 cents compared to $1.00 by white men.

Looking at women of color, the findings are even lower: Asian American women, 74 cents; African American women, 67 cents; and Latinas, 56 cents.

Though many women and men are fully aware of the continuing existence of sexism, male privilege and domination, and they are working tirelessly for its eradication, many others, however, fail to perceive its harmful effects on themselves and others. This apparent invisibility of

TTWARREN’S WORDS cont’d page 27

ACCESSline Page 8

Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

Northwest Iowa: My little corner of the world by D. Raymond Wetherell Homophobic Slurs & Housing Discrimination

When I first decided I would like to write for ACCESSline I thought that the hardest part would be finding something worth mentioning. As I started doing research for the column I quickly realized the amazing wealth of news and information out there that has an impact, not just on the LGBT community, but for those of us in Iowa as well.

A study was done

by Dr. Monica Stephens and her students at Humboldt State University in California called, “The Geography of Hate.” The use of homophobic slurs on twitter was studied to determine those areas of the country most likely to use such hate speech.

As you might expect the South and MidAtlantic lead the country in use of such hate speech. A bit more surprising though is the citizens of Iowa are also very likely to use the words tracked. Interestingly enough if you visit their website you can zoom in on a more local level and you’ll find that such hate speech is spread throughout the state.

It is not limited to the cities or even the less than progressive areas like northwest Iowa where I make my home.

I do not claim to have an explanation for this trend. What I do know however is that while we are enjoying a great deal of

improvement in terms of equality there is a great deal yet to be done, especially on the public relations front. LGBT organizations in Iowa are doing a great job in this regard but we can not forget there’s still work left to do.

And discrimination in housing came to my attention as another area with work still to do. A study was put out by the United States Department of Housing and Urban Development concerning discrimination against same sex couples. Without going into too great of detail, the results showed that across the country discrimination exists. Perhaps more shockingly, though is that in states like Iowa, where housing discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity is prohibited, discrimination was even worse.

To test this result, I contacted everyone who had posted about a rental situation on Craigslist over the past three days. These included businesses and individuals from every major city in Iowa as well as a great many from rural areas. In my email message I represented myself as one half of a same sex marriage and explained that I was looking for housing in their respective area. Out of the approximately 150 postings I contacted I received a ten percent response and of that ten percent, six were to say that the property was no longer available.

Admittedly my experiment could not

have been further from scientific. I employed a shot-gun approach but, even with that being the case, I think the lack of response could well be indicative of a very serious problem facing the LGBT community. I would encourage everyone to be well aware of the protections provided to them by both the State of Iowa and their local area. If we as a community stand idly by while landlords discriminate against us nothing is ever going to change.

However…just so nobody thinks I am anything less than an eternal optimist, I’d like to remind you that not only is 2013 an anniversary year for the LGBT equality movement but it is actually a series of anniversaries which led us to where we are today.

In 1973 the American Psychiatric Association removed homosexuality from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. It was also in 1973 that the American Bar Association passed a resolution recommending the repeal of state laws against sodomy. This is something the State of Iowa did in 1978 although the last laws were not repealed until a Supreme Court ruling in 2003. It was also in 2003 that Massachusetts became the first state to allow same sex marriages. As of last month thirteen states, the District of Columbia and five Native American Tribes extend that same right.

I know sometimes it can be disheartening when a court someplace rules against the LGBT community or a legislature makes yet another effort to intrude into our bedrooms.

Despite that though if you stop and think about where we were just forty years ago and how far we’ve come today, it is easy to realize

A question posed to me at recent meeting of church deacons was to examine where one finds “God” in one’s life. My response is simple and perhaps a shared response via music. In my time, I have studied music theory and composition at university. I have written music and performed music. I enjoy a great many different styles of music as a listener of the various tunes belting from both recorded and, especially, live performances.

Aside from a meal, can you think of anything that will bring disparate and politically divided people to common areas or common venues? One could argue that sports business brings in a ton of money for athletes and the marketers trying to sell the game far beyond an average (or starring artist) can manage. Yet, sportsminded people invigorate the prejudices and egos of home teams and favorite players. Yes, many of these have or made their talents be worthy of grandeur; they are still inciting a sense of competition among the population.

I cannot discount the interest in having good competition among people nor that of sports in general (I partake in many amateur sports competitions).

Yet, athletes, and the money surrounding some sports, can cause a rise above simple team love into forceful persuasion

of beliefs. Many referees can attest to this. Even with music, a good performer will find followers and people willing to pay good money to watch a performance.

Some will debate the talent of a particular performer or writer, but when crowds come to see this performer(s), ticket holders (whether paid or free) come with a common interest to hear what that performer can deliver.

American football Super Bowl can be an exhilarating event if you are one of the athletes or if your team is one that is playing. Even among team fans, it could be argued that there is a sense of comradeship that is revealed that is above petty politics or some other gross discrimination for at least the length of the game.

With music, many people of different stripes share an interest in a style of music and a performer. With exception of musicians that have gone “openly” politically, audiences go to watch a performance of some piece that became their soul, their song, their passion or their release. A musician brings people together, not just because they enjoy a melody but because the song became a part of them.

Interestingly, sports teams replay Queen’s “We Are the Champions” because we, as fans, want to hear and to ultimately see that music revealed in our teams. Note, however, that Queen gave the fan a verse

to sing about love of team. Trumpets and drums are used to summon a call to arms.

Even, political campaigns play songs with themes of better times because the orator, especially of lower skill, wants you to have the feeling that what he or she is saying is going to make you feel “better”. These happen because music invokes common passions and inspires.

Music can bring people of divergent opinions of all sorts together in a venue without a need to be competing with each other. There might be the occasional impromptu fashion debates or etiquette quarrels. When people come to watch a musician, there is an interest in what that musician delivers to our hearts through performance of the pieces. That is because in that moment of music enjoyment, the competition of the world is quieted for a moment.

We may lead “lives of quiet desperation”, but music allows us to live in a moment fully when we find that one song, that one melody, or that one harmony that fills our hearts with all that we were missing. Yet, unlike Thoreau, we do not need to let the music go to the grave with us nor do we need to lose the uncanny companionship that we gain from mutual music interests.

Just as diverse as opinions about politics can be, so also can our passions about music be. Yet, no one would draw a gun over how someone tickles the piano or beats a drum. Even traffic can have a sense of beautiful orchestration when we

Perhaps more shockingly though is that in states like Iowa, where housing discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity is prohibited, discrimination was even worse.

Simple Gifts by Tony Dillon-Hansen We may lead “lives of quiet desperation”, but music allows us to live in a moment fully when we find that one song…

The author after a decade and a half away for college, work and the military moved him back to the rural northwest Iowa community where he was born and raised. Originally slated to write about military issues he now pretty much writes about whatever catches his interest. Please feel free to contact him with questions, comments or story suggestions at nwiowan@gmail.com. that the fight for LGBT equality has been gaining momentum and it is only a matter of time before it is a reality rather than an idea.

I’d like to close with the story of Ohio men John Arthur and his longtime partner Jim Obergefell. The two had been dating for nearly twenty years when Obergefell was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s disease.

Although fighting the terminal illness Arthur and Obergefell, in the company of friends, travelled from Ohio to Maryland on a specially equipped plan so that they could spend what time Obergefell has left married. It is heartening to think that because of the efforts of the LGBT community this couple and people like them can have their love recognized legally.

We’ve got a ways to go but this kind of story should remind everyone out there that things can and are getting better.

Tony E Dillon-Hansen is a web developer, organizer, researcher, writer, martial artist, and vocalist from Des Moines. For more information go to tigersnapdragons.com. allow ourselves to be with the world and our senses. Electronic themes over riffs (acoustic or electronic) can be an escape for anyone willing to hear what is being played. What we can learn from music is more than notes on a page, melodies, rhythms, or tempos, but we can even learn how we as humans have mutual interests in different ways from different paths.

There are aspects in our lives that showcase competition among human beings along with community like sports.

There are also forms in our lives that show us how things are connected to each other with or without competition. Music is one of those forms, especially considering

TTDILLON-HANSEN cont’d page 9

Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

ACCESSline Page 9

Minor Details by Robert Minor Now, What Will the Celebration Over ENDA Look Like?

What a relief it was to hear that the US Supreme Court had overturned Section 3 of the “Defense of Marriage Act” that was signed into law by centrist Democrat Bill Clinton in 1996. No longer can the federal government define marriage as exclusively heterosexual.

Now it’s back to the states, for this Court is for nothing if it isn’t states’ rights. The President can decide if federal marriage benefits are defined by the definition of marriage in the state one lives or the state one is married in, but the battle for full marriage equality depends upon politics at those state levels and some long, drawn-out court cases that must begin soon with samesex couples suing for recognition in their non-accepting home states.

One legal hurdle is gone, and the celebrations all around the nation were exuberant, maybe overly. There should be relief that on the way to full human rights the law has taken this turn even as the right-wing flails in reaction and there’s so much more to do.

The push for marriage all began with the hope embedded in Hawaii’s surprising

legalization of marriage equality in 1993.

Since then, the majority of the resources of the LGBT community and its allies have been focused upon marriage equality.

In addition to this lengthy court case, thirteen states have since changed their laws with one or two more following soon.

The concentration of resources on marriage equality isn’t surprising because for those in LGBT communities who are privileged not to have to worry about their jobs and wealth— those who control the most resources— this is the cause that touches most immediately upon their self-interest.

But in the 29 states where someone can be fired for being gay and the 34 for being transgender, those not so privileged experience more life or death issues. The more basic issues of jobs, careers, and income loom large.

As Harvard professor and author of A Queer History of the United States, Michael Bronski told Salon.com: “All of these probably white, probably upper-middle-class people who’ve been fighting for marriage because it’s a good fight, will they be as willing to give $500 a year to Lambda [Legal] to fight trans youth harassed by police? We’re dealing with how people’s politics come out of their experiences.

“A white middle-class couple living in the suburbs of Illinois may not have much

But in the 29 states where someone can be fired for being gay and the 34 for being transgender, those not so privileged experience more life or death issues

desire to think about transgender youth, possibly of color, living in New York City or San Francisco. Isn’t that the job of the national organizations to convince people that this is as important as the issue of same-sex marriage?”

Journalist-filmmaker David France, known for his documentary chronicling activism during the AIDS crisis, How to Survive a Plague, was even more concerned: “This is a deeply conservative victory and, yes, a too expensive one, given what our leaders have let slide in recent years. Marriage won’t stop the runaway HIV epidemic among our young. It won’t stop religious hatred, sexual assaults, reparative therapy crimes, bullying, Mormons, Boy Scouts or popes.

“Although I am myself gay-married, and while I do enjoy being endorsed by a SCOTUS majority, even a slim one, I’ve been utterly dumbstruck watching every resource at the community’s disposal channeled into this one optional and limited middle-class goal.

“We used to be revolutionaries. We once were outlaws. And now: betrothed?

If we settle for this, we let the whole world down.”

For those not privileged, news that the federal Employment Non-Discrimination Act had obtained its fiftieth U.S. Senate sponsor and was approved by the Senate Health, Education, Labor and Pensions Committee by a 15-7 bipartisan vote on July 10, could have raised the hope of some economic security.

But even FOX and CNN gave no coverage to the furthest ENDA had advanced in the seventeen years since it was first introduced to Congress. And one wonders how many in the LGBT community even know ENDA is a cause.

Even in the former slave state of Missouri, the state’s senate ended its session for the first time passing the Missouri Nondiscrimination Act. The fight for this first step by Missouri’s LGBT political advocacy group, PROMO, has been long and grueling, but it hasn’t received anything like the amount of attention and financial support that has left Missouri to promote the marriage cause.

It’s not unusual for those in any demographic who have risen in a class system above overt discrimination to forget what it’s still like for the majority.

It’s not unusual for them even to deny the discrimination others experience, refuse to believe that much discrimination still exists, or blame those who experience it as bringing it on themselves. Just think Clarence Thomas.

SScontinued from page 8

DILLON-HANSEN some of the best music in the world often combines a theme (point) and counterpoint in artful detail. An argument without punches. The confluence of theme, counter patterns, randomness and competition can be found in music, and the good writer leaves some of the work for listener to interpret how that applies to you.

Good artists let you do some of the interpreting, to make the song yours, and thus, the theme can resonate with people

Robert N. Minor, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus of Religious Studies at the University of Kansas, is author of When Religion Is an Addiction; Scared Straight: Why It’s So Hard to Accept Gay People and Why It’s So Hard to Be Human and Gay & Healthy in a Sick Society. Contact him at www.FairnessProject.org.

But times like these are also tests as to whether any community of people actually exists. Is the category being used to lump people together a fiction? Or is economic class what really and primarily divides Americans from one another when it comes down to it?

The pursuit of marriage equality without the same effort invested toward ending workplace and accommodation discrimination confirms the claims of many activists that there really is nothing we can call the LGBT community. There are the elite and the rest, different generations, L’s, G’s, B’s, T’s and others, as well as many other divisions whose identities are based upon their personal interests.

Even the earliest versions of ENDA did not include provisions to protect transgender people. It was added in 2007, but Barney Frank then believed transgender people should be sacrificed to make its passage more successful, thereby riling many activists.

Socio-economic class is the major divider in Capitalist America. So we’ll see how it plays out in the so-called LGBT community. But for those who really want permanent equality for all, it can’t be a barrier.

“People shouldn’t consider themselves progressive just because they support their own rights,” said veteran LGBT activist Allen Roskoff. “I’m tired of people saying they’re progressive because they just support their own rights more than equity for all.”

of different social or political backgrounds.

In this world of polarized communities, is it not nice to see a conductor on the podium who can show how all of this can work together with a whisk of the baton or how a soloist can move an entire crowd to tears with slow ballad? Certain politicians would do well to realize how trivial differences are.

The world is connected, and music can showcase that connection. Maybe, that is a simple gift, and perhaps, that is an example of how one might find God, which we can always cherish.

ACCESSline Page 10

Section 1: News & Politics

AUGUST 2013

Looking past DOMA

In the Name of Religion

“We the People of the United States”

Matthew Shepard and Trayvon Martin: Bigotry knows no boundaries

by Anthony Brown

The above phrase comes from the opening line of the Preamble of the United States Constitution, signed in 1781. That is 232 years ago. It is not: We the Straight, We the Gay, We the White, We the Black, We the Rich, or We the Poor. It is “We the People.”

DOMA and Prop 8 Rulings from the United States Supreme Court, to me, only strengthen the power of that phrase for me, as it should for us all. We have lived so long as a nation, and also as a community, that only looks at the differences that divide. We never strive for a middle ground any more.

We need to fix that. It is up to us, the “We” of the United States to build upon this platform and continue to make our communities great.

Here’s another saying: “As Iowa goes, so goes the Nation.”

Now it took 4 years, but the Nation has replicated the equality that Iowans have enjoyed, to an extent. No longer will married spouses of the same gender have to “lie” to the Federal Government about the legality of their marriage.

The more than 1,100 benefits/privileges of marriage available at the Federal level will actually be enjoyed by all married couples in the United States.

I’m going to catch myself here, because everyone (yes, everyone who has fought for civil marriage equality) always stands upon our soapbox and preaches about the privileges and benefits of marriage… but no one ever talks about the responsibility of marriage. It’s not always rainbows, butterflies, and reruns of the Notebook. Most of the marriage vows that I’ve ever heard/read include the words “for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or worse, till death do us part.” Now if that doesn’t imply marriage is responsibility, I’m not sure what does.

So while on Wednesday we had shows of spontaneous love in the form of marriage proposals, I want to convey that spontaneity is fabulous, yet please accept the responsibility that sharing your life with someone entails.

Anthony is the LGBT Fellow and Manager of Community Engagement & Development for Diversity Focus, based in Cedar Rapids, IA. He is also a community advocate and volunteer, a collaborator, connector, and a do-er. To contact Anthony go to BrownForCR.org What starting a family and caring for others brings into your life.

Side note–do you know that states that have marriage equality have 20% lower divorce rates than states that do not allow marriage equality? In fact, Iowa has the 2nd lowest divorce rate in the country, per 2010 census info. Another plus to being an Iowan!

Hopefully we can look back on Wednesday’s rulings, just like we can look back at the Loving v. Virgina Ruling some 46 years ago (it also happened in June of that year) which struck down the ban on interracial marriage, and just go “Huh? We really banned that? We banned love and commitment? Really?”

My last thought–The second part of the Preamble, “In order to form a more perfect Union” also applies here, so let’s re-write this as a closing: “We the People of these United States, in order to form a more perfect Union, do hereby grant the full benefit, privilege, and responsibilities in, no matter gender, sex, race, religion, state of residence, creed, or political affiliation, full Recognition of all Married Spouses across this Great Nation.”

Get my point?

It’s not always rainbows, butterflies, and reruns of the Notebook.

The Project of the Quad Cities

Founded in 1986, The Project of the Quad Cities is a non-profit HIV/STI/AIDS Service Organization that provides support to persons living with HIV/STI/AIDS as well as their families and friends in Iowa and Illinois. www.apqc4life.org Symptom Management Group—Every Wednesday from 1-2:30 pm Life Skills Group—Every other Wednesday from 10-11:30 am Coffee Hour—10-11:30 am on Wednesdays when the Life Skills Group does not meet; A relaxed and casual atmosphere Groups meet at our Moline office. We also offer free HIV testing Monday through Thursday from 9 am to 4 pm.

For more information call Susie or Mollie at 309-762-5433

Transformations Iowa Meeting

Transformations meets every Wednesday at 7 PM, the second Saturday of each month at 1 PM, One Iowa, 419 SW 8th St, Des Moines, IA 50309. Transformations Iowa is a Transgender support group. It is open to all ranges of the gender

spectrum, male to female, female to male, cross dressers, drag queens, gender queer, questioning, as well as friends, significant others and allies. For more information email sophia.transformations@gmail. com or call 515-288-4019 x200.

by Rev. Irene Monroe

The nation is once again divided along the fault line of race. In a perceived 2013 postracial society, however, William Faulkner’s prophetic quote “the past is never dead. It’s not even past” of the last century have come back to haunt us in this century.

Faulkner’s quote haunts us because of the recent verdict of the George Zimmerman trial.

The story, as you well know by now, of how George Zimmerman, a volunteer neighborhood watchmen of a Florida community, was acquitted of all charges—murder and manslaughter—related to Trayvon Martin.

Zimmerman’s actions resulted in the fatal shooting of Martin, a 17-year unarmed black teenager. Martin was perceived to be a suspect because he was wearing the signature piece of clothing that some associate with violent young black males—a hoodie.

And he was not only wearing it but also “walking while black” in a gated community.

With no one of African descent—male or female—serving on the jury, the nation sadly, once again, has shown to be neither colorblind with an all-white jury nor post-racial with one. And the notion that an all-white female jury would render a fairer outcome than an all-white male jury assumes racial bias is gender-specific.

Just as racial bias isn’t gender-specific; it is also not race-specific. Zimmerman is of a mixed ethnic descent (mother’s Peruvian, and father’s Jewish) who identifies as Hispanic.

The question many are still asking, even after the verdict, is whether Zimmerman was motivated by racism because he, too, is a person of color; therefore, was Zimmerman racially profiling Trayvon?

Racial, gender, gender-expression, and all the other biases float freely through society—landing on all. Just because you’re a person of color or a member of an oppressed group doesn’t mean you don’t buy into stereotypes and racial and cultural attitudes.

These themes inform our judgments and actions toward others as well as your own group. (Case in point: Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas.)

As a matter-of-fact, the bombardment of stereotypes has proven to have both

Rev. Irene Monroe is a graduate from Wellesley College and Union Theological Seminary at Columbia University, and she has served as a pastor at an AfricanAmerican church before coming to Harvard Divinity School for her doctorate as Ford Fellow. She is a syndicated queer religion columnist who tries to inform the public of the role religion plays in discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people. Her website is irenemonroe.com. subtle and unintended consequences toward people of different races, ethnicities, sexual orientation, class and religions, to name just a few. It’s not just regular people who succumb.

Geraldo Rivera, a renowned Latino, stated that Trayvon wearing a hoodie was “as much responsible” for his death as Zimmerman’s pistol. Of course, Rivera later recanted.

A young man has become the symbol of the horrific result of such stereotyping, and is fast becoming the symbol for a movement. Just as Matthew Shepard’s death galvanized a nation, Trayvon Martin’s death is doing the same.

In 1998 both James Byrd Jr., and Matthew Shepard were victims of bias-motivated crimes. Byrd, an African American was murdered by three white supremacists that chained him to the back of their pick-up truck at his ankles and dragged along a three mile asphalt road until he was dismembered.

Shepard was tortured, tethered to a fence and left to die because he was gay.

The Matthew Shepard and James Byrd Hate Crimes Prevention Act, also known as the Matthew Shepard Act, was passed. The measure expanded the federal hate-crimes law to include crimes motivated by a victim’s actual or perceived race, gender, gender identity, and sexual orientation, to just name a few.

With Florida’s Stand Your Ground permitting Zimmerman to walk without charges, the Shepard-Byrd statute not only reminds us of how bias-motivated crimes links gays and blacks together but that it’s the best hope for Trayvon Martin and his family seeking justice.

Just because you’re a person of color or a member of an oppressed group doesn’t mean you don’t buy into stereotypes and racial and cultural attitudes.

ACCESSline’s fun guide

Our Picks for August 8/9, The Blazing Saddle, Des Moines, Iowa,

A Weekend with the Collin BoysI Mean Girls, TheBlazingSaddle.com

“Boystown” A Journey to Oz Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme

8/9-25, Bell Tower Theater, Dubuque, Iowa, Motherhood: The Musical, BellTowerTheater.net 8/10, Waterloo, Iowa, McElroy Auditorium, Brawlers vs. DCDC, CVDerbyDivas.com 8/10, Decorah Fish Hatchery, Decorah, Iowa,

United Way of Winneshiek County 5K/8K Run/Walk, UnitedWayWinnco.org

8/17, The Hull Avenue Tavern, Des Moines, Iowa, BurlyCon!, BurlyCon.org 8/17, McKennan Park, Sioux Falls, South Dakota, Sioux Falls Pride , Facebook.com/ SiouxFallsPride 8/17, Blazing Saddle, Des Moines, Iowa,

End of Reign Party & Scavenger Hunt, TheBlazingSaddle.com 8/17, Belle’s Basix, Cedar Rapids, Iowa,

Presentation of Candidates Show,

Facebook.com/BellesBasix 8/18, Legion Arts CSPS, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, The Kinsey Sicks, LegionArts.org 8/24, Downtown, Waterloo, Iowa, Cedar Valley Pridefest 2013, CedarValleyPride.com 8/31-9/15, Sleepy Hollow Sports Park, Pleasant Hill, Iowa, Des Moines Renaissance Faire, DMRenFaire.com 8/24, Englert Theatre, Iowa City, Iowa, Shelter Our Community, IowaCityCommunityTheatre.com

...and September 9/1, Garden, Des Moines, Iowa,

Leslie Jordan: Show Pony, GRDN.com

9/6, Waterloo Community Playhouse, Waterloo, Iowa, Leading Ladies, WCPBHCT.org 9/7, Broad View Wildflower Seed Garden, Grinnell, Iowa, Wildflower Tour , BroadViewWildflowerSeed.com 9/6-29, Des Moines Playhouse, Des Moines, Iowa, Fiddler on the Roof, DMPlayhouse.com

Mark Ortega. Courtesy of Mystic Images Photography.

The yellow brick road of life brought Mark Ortega and Danny MacArthur together to co-write the pop single “Boystown”. Released this past year, “Boystown” is not just about one neighborhood, but all neighborhoods and experiences that bring people ‘home’.

An upbeat, dance/pop/electronic song that makes you want to move, it also gives listeners a positive rush of acceptance. Mark and Danny took the time to talk about their passion for music, role models, collaborating, and how their experiences inspired their newest single.

Tell me about your musical background?

Mark: Music is my life’s passion. From the moment in second grade, when I sat down at the piano—I could play everything my older brother was practicing.

During grade school I was classically trained on the piano, in college I studied jazz and pop writing and began voice training.

Danny MacArthur: I personally have been writing and producing since 1998. I’ve been in the electronic pop group Crush 333 since 1992 . I had a hit dance single on the billboard charts called Skin Party—ages ago—and been chasing the creativity dragon ever since.

Connecting and communicating with people through art and music is my only voice.

Who are your role models and why?

Mark: If you are speaking musically, Madonna has to be my ultimate role model and inspiration. Her style and messages through the years always remain relevant. Her music takes me on a journey. Also LGBTQ artists like Any Bell and Pet Shop Boys are role models to me. They have never been afraid to embrace their queerness and it shows in their music.

Danny MacArthur: Everyone is or has been a role model at one time, when they get the chance to tell you their proudest story—so everyone!

How did your collaboration come about?

Danny MacArthur: We were cross town

rivals…who knew!

Mark: Danny Macarthur and I first met years ago at Club Ripples in Long Beach, CA. A band mate of mine, Paula Flowers, and I decided to go to Ripples for a Sunday Funday.

She saw Danny walking up the stairs and immediately wanted to meet him. He has this eccentric “rock star” aura about him. As it turned out, he was a producer, singer and songwriter who was developing local artists in L.A.. He has one of the most amazing rock voices. I reached out to him to work on my vocal performances as he is a great vocal teacher as well.

I approached him on an original song called “Take Me Now” and the chemistry was instant. He has this knack for taking my song ideas and bringing it to another level—he is my musical muse.

Tell me about Chicago’s Boystown and what makes it unique.

Danny MacArthur: I had heard so much about Chicago Boystown for so long that when I finally made it, it was like home, but no home I had ever known. Wait a minute, that’s sleepless in Seattle! But I did feel that way—it’s one of the best for sure!

Mark: Even though the song is about all of the famous gayborhoods here and abroad, Chicago’s Boystown is perhaps my favorite.

Boystown in Lakeview was the first to be officially recognized by a major city council... even before L.A. and surprisingly before San Francisco and New York. That’s amazing when you think about that. How did the Midwest beat NYC and West Hollywood to be officially recognized first? And don’t tell L.A., but I think the guys here in Chicago are better looking overall.

Tell me about the cover for “Boystown”.

Mark: The cityscape sketch on the single cover art of “Boystown” was hand sketched by one of my LGBT co-workers, James Mae, and somehow digitally recreated. Look at it.

Bringing another experience or adventure that we may have all shared to glorious Technicolor Fabulousness is likely in the forecast !

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Inside Out

by Ellen Krug Reflections on 100 Dates First published in ACCESSline’s March 2010, vol. 24, no. 3 Issue.

Since coming out as transgendered, one of the things people say to me goes like this: “Oh, you must feel like a teenager again, starting all over with a new life.” I have to admit that some of this is true: I do feel like a teenager again (even to the point of taking acne medicine), but this is not necessarily a good thing. One of the negatives is that I’m learning things all over. Like dating. Like being alone.

Like wondering if I’m cute enough to attract someone other than the guy left after last call.

I’ve probably gone on 100 dates of one sort or another since 2004.

And just to be sure that all of my bases are covered, I have dated both men and women. One would think that this “doubles my chances” for a happy relationship. In reality, it just means more chances for me to meet people who absolutely will not provide me with a happy relationship. I can report that I’ve not disappointed myself in that regard. I had never thought finding a quality, durable relationship would be so difficult. Of course, maybe it’s just me, Princess Ellen.

So as a 53 year old teenager, let me report on some lessons learned on the 21st century dating front.

My first post-marriage date was with a bisexual woman who posted an attractive picture on Match.com. She was extremely witty in her on-line profile and it made me think, “I’ve got to meet this person.” We set up a meeting at a restaurant. I walked into the place and the host pointed to a woman sitting at a table. I replied, “Oh, no, that could not be her, she looks nothing like the woman online.” (And she didn’t!) As I said this, the woman rose and waved to me.

It was too late for me to run out the door.

Lesson No. 1: Never reveal yourself until you check out the date. And always make sure you have an escape route.

Then there was the man I met last

Thanksgiving at a very fancy restaurant in Minneapolis. Now, this guy had sent a picture of him on a beach, with the camera some distance away. By this time, I had learned from Lesson No. 1, so it did not surprise me that in real life, this guy (whom we will call Charlie) was not of Richard Gere quality.

Prior to meeting, Charlie had told me that he had divorced his wife in California and had recently relocated for a new job and fresh start. That was important since I do not date married people nor do I date people in long-term relationships. After ordering drinks, I asked Charlie how long he had been divorced. With a sheepish smile he said, “We’re technically not divorced, just separated.” I then asked for how long.

He replied, “Two weeks, only she doesn’t know it yet.” I spent the rest of the meal wondering how I could order a couple bottles of wine to go since he was picking up the tab.

Lesson No. 2: The word “married” is just an adjective for some people.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ve had some promising dates with some very decent people. There was the first man I dated. What a class act; he brought flowers every time he met one of my female friends.

When I broke it off, he told me, “You will never find another man as good as me.”

He was right.

Lesson No. 3: Sometimes the good ones get away through Ellen’s fault—all her own.

One day, I ran into a woman visiting from Minneapolis. She described herself as being straight as a teen; then a lesbian in her 20s; she then married a man and became mother to two children in her 30s; later she returned to being a lesbian in her 40s. By the time I met her at almost 50, she seemed open to dating transgenders.

Throw in that she was a therapist, and I figured that both of us had a real chance at happiness. I mean really, if it couldn’t

The Des Moines Chapter of Parents & Friends of Lesbians & Gays (PFLAG) will meet at 6:30 pm at the Unitarian Universalist Church, 1800 Bell Avenue Des Moines, IA 50315 on the third Tuesday of every month.

The meeting begins with a short business meeting followed by an educa-

tional presentation, and a social and support session. All are welcome!

Made up of parents, families, friends, and straight allies uniting with lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people, PFLAG is committed to advancing equality through its mission of support, education and advocacy.

GOglbt is starting a new group of GLBT business owners or business professionals to meet twice monthly to support each other’s businesses by providing referrals.

They will meet every other Thursday from 7:30am-8:30am at a TBD Wells Fargo sponsored location. Refreshments

will be provided. Once they secure the location the meetings will start. Membership Fee is $50.00 and will include a business listing on the GOglbt.com website.

To sign up to be a part of this group please call Tom Luke at 402-650-2917, or email him at tom@lukedirectmarketing.com.

There was the first man I dated. What a class act; he brought flowers every time he met one of my female friends.

PFLAG - Des Moines Chapter Meeting

New GOglbt Business Referral Group

work with this woman, what hope did I have? We dated for seven months until my skirt wearing became a deal breaker.

Lesson No. 4: Just because someone has a history that’s as screwed up as your own, it does not mean the two of you are perfect for each other.

I came across only one person whom I would call just plain mean. He stood me up on the first date. After sitting in my lobby waiting with no call from him, I said “the hell with you.” Five days later, he emailed with an excuse that sounded marginally plausible. Over the course of the next six months, he regularly emailed saying how he regretted his mistake. Finally, I gave in and agreed to meet for a drink. On the day of the date, he called three times to say how much he looked forward to finally meeting. I got to the bar early and received his text, “I’m on my way.” You guessed it; he never showed. After forty-five minutes of waiting, I left him a voicemail, “You are an *sshole. You really need to get some therapy.”

Lesson No. 5: God, Ellen, you can be so stupid sometimes.

If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m a bit of a slow teenage learner and I’m having trouble getting down some of the current rules of dating. I’ve only recently understood that the phrase, “For sure,” as in, “For sure I want to see you again,” really means, “Maybe, and only if something better doesn’t come along.” And one thing I may never get is this texting stuff from

AUGUST 2013

Ellie Krug is a columnist and the author of Getting to Ellen: A Memoir about Love, Honesty and Gender Change. She resides in Minneapolis and welcomes your comments at ellenkrugwriter@gmail.com. Visit her blog at www.gettingtoellen.com. potential dates. I mean, really, why don’t you just call? Or email? Doesn’t it take more brain power just to come up with those damned abbreviations?

For the moment, I’ve called a time out to dating. I need to get all of my body on the same female page. I’m probably going to be off the dating rolls for a year. But, when I come back, watch out. With what I’ve learned about how men and women date, I’ll be ready for anything… or if need be, more lessons.

And another 100 dates. (Or so I think!)

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Wired This Way by Rachel Eliason

Safe Sext

Those lovely little math geeks over at MIT are at it again. In the past I have written about how a group of math students used Facebook data to determine a mathematical algorithm to figure who was gay or straight.

And it works, well enough for targeted advertising to out gay men.

What have they done now? They have created a visual map of your relationships based on your emails.

Why? Because this is one of the primary things that the NSA is doing. MIT wants to show you just what the government and private corporations mean when they say “metadata” and exactly how invasive their spying really is.

The argument is that metadata, which does not include your name or any identifying information, isn’t really an invasion of privacy after all. When TechCrunch writer Gregory Ferenstein entered his companies data into MIT’s voluntary (and private) database two things became quickly apparent. He could easily identify the teams and team leaders. He could also tell which relationships were hidden, in this case the email address of sources that didn’t want to be identified. “Big nodes with few linkages,” he says, “points to relationships best kept hidden.”

In a case of life imitating art, the graph resemblances the now infamous chart from the L word, a visual three dimensional graph of who is connected to who. Except for two not so small differences. It’s not who you have had sex with, but all your contacts. Also there is no hiding. Even those

relationships you don’t claim are on there.

MIT is using email “metadata” consisting of the from, to and Cc lines at the top and the timestamp. The NSA has the potential to include phone contacts, social media contacts and web based data to its map.

In another only tangentially related piece of news, the same Techcrunch writer wondered briefly is fitness data recorded on smart watches could be used to track marital infidelity. Sexual activity has a unique biometric signature on such graphs, so assuming your spouse has access to the data and you wear your watch while having sex, it’s possible. Which in turn implies that the NSA also knows when you are having sex.

A quick disclaimer: I don’t approve of marital infidelity, sharing data or wearing watches while having sex. But that’s just me. Open marriages, shared data plans and even watch wearing are valid lifestyle choices.

All of this talk about sensitive data makes me think it’s time to talk about safe sext. Exchanging flirtatious messages and private pictures have become part of America’s sexual culture but there are hazards that everyone needs to be aware of. Like sex, the only truly safe sext is no sext, but one hundred percent abstinence is unlikely and frankly, no fun.

So how do you sext safely? The good bloggers at Lifehacker have some excellent suggestions (How to practice safe sext).

The first step to safer sexting is to limit the amount of identifying data in the picture.

Be careful of showing identifying features, like your face, in the picture. They can also

be cropped or edited out using photo software. You can use photoshop or a similar program to blur out faces, but you should be aware that similar software may be able to remove the blur.

Another piece of data that most nongeeks are unaware of is EXIF data. This is metadata that includes location, time the picture was taken and information about the device. Each operating system and device has specific ways of removing EXIF data, so do some research on your phone, computer or device. Many phones have automatic syncing and backup features. You may delete something off your phone only to find it on your apple or google account later (Usually while scrolling through pictures with your grandma).

You should also send and store any risque pictures safely. IM and texting are the most convenient ways to contact a loved one, but the least secure. Social media sites like Facebook are notoriously unsafe.

Separate apps and devices often stay logged in to your account, meaning that your kids could be using your ipad and unwittingly seeing the photos you are sending from your phone. Besides the pictures stay on Facebook’s servers and could accidentally be made public later through a change in Facebook’s privacy settings (which I am sure would never happen).

Third party apps like Dropbox are more secure. Risque pictures can be stored in hidden files on your home computer or put in a vault. A vault is an app for your mobile phone that locks designated photos and files behind a password. Racy text messages stay on your phone and your carriers servers. Google hangouts allows you to create a private chat session and even disable the history so there is no record.

It takes two to tango and the best safe sext advice is worthless if your partner

the average American eats 130 pounds of sugar per year. But the story doesn’t end there.

In our above example of a banana versus Starburst candies, no one would argue that the candy is a healthier choice.

That’s because the banana comes loaded with essential nutrients that our bodies need. The candies, on the other hand, don’t.

Here’s the deal: Many foods that contain naturally occurring sugar also contain some really great stuff–so you need to pay attention to other things like vitamins, minerals and fiber to get a more complete picture. Foods with added sugar are often nutritionally devoid. Think donuts, cake and soda.

And it’s worth noting that a nutrition label doesn’t distinguish between naturally occurring sugar and added sugar.

You’ll have to read the ingredients carefully to see if sugar is added. If ingredients like barley malt, high fructose corn syrup, brown sugar, maltose, molasses, etc., are listed, then you’ll know there is added sugar in the food product.

Having said that, it’s still wise to

minimize all forms of sugar. Naturally occurring sugar is still sugar, and there are plenty of ways to get nutrients without the sweet stuff–added or otherwise.

Like sex, the only truly safe sext is no sext, but one hundred percent abstinence is unlikely and frankly, no fun.

Honor Your Body, Honor You by Davey Wavey Difference Between Sugar and Added Sugar!

If you look at the nutrition information for a banana and a serving of Starburst candies, you might be surprised to notice a few similarities–including the amount of sugar. Both foods have about 28 grams of sugar.

Of course, there’s a difference: A banana has naturally occurring sugar while the candies have added sugar. What’s the difference? And is one for of sugar healthier than the other?

All sugars are a form of carbohydrate.

According to Calorie Count: Naturally occurring sugars include lactose in milk, fructose in fruit, honey and vegetables and maltose in beer. Added sugars originate from corn, beets, grapes, and sugar cane, which are processed before being added to foods. The body cannot tell the difference between naturally occurring and added sugars because they are identical chemically.

Sugar is sugar, and we know that all of us get way too much of it. In fact,

Sugar is sugar, and we know that all of us get way too much of it.

Rachel Eliason is a forty two year old Transsexual woman. She was given her first computer, a Commodore Vic-20 when she was twelve and she has been fascinated by technology ever since. In the thirty years since that first computer she has watched in awe as the Internet has transformed the LGBT community. In addition to her column, Rachel has published a collection of short stories, Tales the Wind Told Me and is currently working on her debut novel, Run, Clarissa, Run. Rachel can be found all over the web, including on Facebook, Twitter, Google+ and Goodreads. doesn’t care. In the twenty first century computer security is just another aspect of relationships that needs to be discussed.

If those racy pictures are for his/her eyes only, make sure they know that. If you are worried that they will be searchable on his/ her phone, say so.

Just how concerned about safe sext should you be? That depends on a lot of factors, most of them personal. Sexting between consenting adults is usually harmless. If one or both of the participants are minors, it can be a felony offense. Nonconsensual sexting, sending racy messages or pictures to anyone who has not asked

TTWIRED continued page 23

Why Do We Drink Cow’s Milk?

Maybe we should just cut out the middleman and go right to the source!

A year ago, I took a trip to Thailand.

It was a beautiful country full of amazing sights, friendly people and delicious but interesting food. From chicken feet to red ants with their eggs to duck mouths, much of the Thai food we encountered seemed quite adventurous.

So when I asked for a glass of milk, I was surprised by the response. Many of the Thai waiters and waitresses seemed repulsed by my request. This caused a good deal of introspection on my part, and–after careful consideration–I realized that it’s actually really strange that we drink the breast milk of cows. And moreover, why don’t we drink the mammary gland secretions from other animals like horses or even humans?

Milk is weird. Of course, just because milk is weird, it doesn’t mean that it’s

Davey Wavey is an AFPA certified personal trainer shares his passion for and knowledge of fitness, exercise, health and nutrition with the world. For more information go to DaveyWaveyFitness.com. unhealthy or that we shouldn’t drink it.

So let’s dig deeper.

In a recent paper published in the Journal of the American Medical Association Pediatrics, Harvard professor David Ludwig questions the role of milk in our diets. Indeed, the government recommends three servings of milk per day to promote a healthy lifestyle–but is that

TTHONOR continued page 23

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The Fun Guide

Iowa’s Gay Weddings

by Scott Stevens

Simple Steps to get Your Iowa Marriage License

Dovesland Creations Adds Personal Flair

Interview by Angela Geno-Stumme

When I started researching all of the legal requirements to get married in Iowa, I had a flashback of taking my driver’s test after the 16th time and thinking, “This is hard!” Now that DOMA is gone people are trying to figure out how to get married in

First, don’t wait until the last minute to apply for your marriage license— you will find yourself in a wedding with no marriage license!

Iowa and what is required to do that. Here are some quick tips for getting married in Iowa. First, don’t wait until the last minute to apply for your marriage license—you will find yourself in a wedding with no marriage license! However, the best part is your application can be used within 6 months of application.

1) You need to wait three business days between the day you apply for a marriage license and the day you get married.

2) You need to pay $35.00 for the application.

3) When you go to the courthouse you

AUGUST 2013

Scott Stevens owner/operator of Iowa’s Gay Wedding Planner.com need a witness that is 18 or over and don’t forget your driver’s license!

4) You can apply for an application through the mail, but you need it notarized.

5) Don’t try to have the three day waiting period waived, that is only for use in medical emergencies and odds are you won’t be approved.

6) I always recommend contacting the courthouse before you mail your information.

Follow these simple steps and within 6-months and you can focus on running down the aisle and not waiting in the recorder’s office.

Robin Baumgarn and Beccie Lyons at Iowa City Pride 2012.

Owned and operated by two exceptional female artists, Dovesland Creations works to create distinct jewelry with LGBT flair.

Beccie Lyons and Robin Baumgarn specialize in creating unique, handcrafted jewelry and accessories. Their pieces reflect their personalities from Bohemian/Hippie to Goth/ Steam Punk. The two talk about the creation of Dovesland Creations, their work within the LGBT community, local drag celebrities, and their relationships with their customers.

Rebecca Lyon began Dovesland Creations 10 years ago. Rebecca, how has it changed in the past 10 years?

Beccie: I started out making gifts for friends and then a friend of mine, Yvette, who runs a couture line out of California told me what I was making for presents was good enough quality to be found in retail stores. So I began selling pieces at local craft festivals on my own in Kentucky. Around two years ago, I began talking to Robin about moving to Iowa and teaming up. Now, we sell our jewelry at festivals around the state and in Minnesota.

Through our Facebook page, we sell jewelry all over the country and in Canada. We’ve also been in contact with stores locally and in Florida about carrying our products. It’s very exciting but we still have a long way to go.

Another by-product I hadn’t initially envisioned has been the ability to use jewelry to raise money for various charities and groups.

Robin and I both like giving back where we can, but we don’t always have the monetary means to make donations, so we donate our time and talent. Recently, we worked with a group of fourth grade girls who wanted to buy their school anti-bullying t-shirts as a legacy project. We worked with them on how to make bracelets, necklaces and key chains that they sold as a fundraiser to earn the money for the shirts. The experience touched both of us because it wasn’t just about making jewelry and having fun, even though it was. We listened to the girls’ stories of how each of them had

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For more information or to purchase tickets visit our website: www.imperialcourtofiowa.org

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The Fun Guide

NKOB: Boys Will be Boys

New Kings on the Block pictured from their July 19th Show at Club CO2, Cedar Rapids, IA. Catch them at their 1st Anniversary show August 9th. Top L/R: Star E. Knight. Bottom and Jill Kennedy. Bottom L/R: Charlie Diamond and left: Jayden Knight.

Photos courtesy of Alana Hyatt.

SScontinued from page 16

DOVESLAND been bullied and offered compassion and advice on how to deal with it. They still come up to us when we are out and hug us and tell us what they’ve been up to. We continue to be their friends and mentors and we feel it is a great way to give back to our local community.

It has been a learning experience to combine our ideas into one business and it hasn’t come without growing pains. I look at jewelry from an artistic standpoint while Robin sees it as artistic, but also as a product.

We’ve butted heads on occasion on making one-of-a kind never to be reproduced pieces versus items that are mass produced. It took us a while, but, we have both in our collection now and we feel it works well.

You have a wide range of inspiration in your jewelry, from Bohemian to Goth; can you tell me about a few different pieces and their inspiration?

Beccie: Being the resident hippie of Dovesland Creations, I do tend to lean more towards the bohemian and hippie pieces. For me, making jewelry is a very organic process.

I sit down with my tools and my pieces are organically born from there. I don’t have patterns in mind per se; but, especially with the wire work, it flows as I work with the materials. I am also a Reiki II practitioner which is a form of holistic healing, and my pieces are infused with Reiki energy.

Robin: I am the self-professed geek of the two and have always been drawn to more Goth and industrial style jewelry. Chances are if it is made of leather and has spikes, skulls and/or roses I will like it. I try to make pieces I personally would wear, which can be bad when some never make it past my jewelry box.

This year I’ve started working with Perler beads and have went nuts making “geek chic” pieces—as we like to call them. A local video game store has started selling 8-bit character inspired key chains with Mario, Sonic the Hedgehog, Link and those types of characters.

I have two orders I am working on now to ship to Canada, one is a set of Resident Evil inspired coasters of the Umbrella Corp logo and the other is a necklace of Boo from Super Mario Bros. I also make hair bows, bow ties and glasses which are just fun. Not all pieces have to be serious. I personally love my Mario

ACCESSline Page 21 mushroom earrings and get compliments when I am at my day job. The kids particularly love them and since I refuse to grow up, it works. What has been interesting to me is to see how we have influenced each other’s styles and where we find a common ground.

Since Beccie’s started doing wire work, she’s been making a lot of ear cuffs. It’s her niche. After attending a renaissance festival last year, she started creating cuffs shaped like elf ears, which did my ‘Lord of the Rings loving heart’ good. She’s even incorporated dragon and superhero game pieces into them.

Meanwhile, I’ve borrowed from her more bohemian side and want to make more pieces with gypsy flair. We bounce ideas off of each other a lot and by allowing ourselves to remain true to who we are as artists it broadens our range tremendously.

What pieces have you designed with your LGBT clientele in mind?

Beccie: This year I took my tax return money and bought high quality crystals to work with because I wanted to make pretty, quality LGBT pieces for this year’s festivals.

While we did do some less expensive, more commercial looking pieces, this year we were able to create a collection that was LGBT specific. We had elaborate wire and crystal scroll work pieces. Robin made some amazing geeky pride items and some “I love my two mommies” and “I love my two daddies” bracelets for kids.

Robin: Like Beccie said, I did a few geeky pieces out of Perler for the festival which were fun. Rainbows abounded. I made the children’s pieces this year in honor of my friends who have small children. We noticed last year at Cedar Rapids Pride and even at Iowa City Pride the large number of families who brought their children. We wanted the kids to have something too. We also make a point to include bisexual pride pieces within our LGBT geared collection. I am bisexual and am proud of who I am and know there are others out there. It’s not always well received, but, that’s okay. You have to start somewhere.

We may also look into more transgendered pride pieces in the near future. We have several friends who are and it is important to both of us to honor them as well.

A new area we are stepping into is jewelry for drag performers. I performed for a

This year I took my tax return money and bought high quality crystals to work with because I wanted to make pretty, quality LGBT pieces for this year’s festivals.

TTDOVESLAND cont’d page 27

The Fun Guide

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AUGUST 2013

The Bookworm Sez by Terri Schlichenmeyer “The Beauty of Men Never Dies” by David Leddick c.2013, Terrace Books, $24.95 / higher in Canada, 135 pages You never thought you’d get this old.

When you were five, for instance, twelve was a big age.

At twelve, you thought twenty-one was the height of maturity.

At twenty-one, eighty seems unattainable. Yet, somewhere along the line, you learn what it takes to use the years well.

Does wisdom come with age? Is it something else? Or, in the new book “The Beauty of Men Never Dies: An Autobiographical Novel” by David Leddick, could it be both?

Somewhere in his seventh decade, David Leddick still has a sex life.

He wants to have a sex life until he’s ninety. “If I can achieve that,” he says, “then I feel I can say my life was a success.” There’s a good chance he’ll do it, too, because Leddick falls in love on a regular basis, though he only really counts four men from his past as significant. He might’ve only imagined an attraction, however. And there was one that he would’ve married, even though they never slept together.

“When I am with someone,” he says, “I belong to him.”

The man he writes about most, though, was the one he met in Uruguay: Fenil (sounds like “fennel”) was a twentyone-year-old policeman who had supplemented his salary by having sex with men and women. Leddick loved him, but it was doomed to be a chaste relation-

ship–perhaps because Fenil was young enough to be Leddick’s grandson, and perhaps because Fenil claimed to be more attracted to women.

Leddick himself was an older man when he came out as gay. He wishes now that he’d taken “a stronger stand on admitting my gayness.” He also wishes he’d admitted deception when he denied spending years in the closet. He grew up in the middle of a large-ish family in Michigan. Could that have anything to do with it?

Today, Leddick travels often, and lived in Paris for a time. He talks to God now and then, and he knows that, at seventy-something, there will be times when he must “go forward alone.” And yet, “The life I am living now is as interesting, perhaps more so, than any other period of my life.”

So. Fiction or non-fiction?

The answer is “Yes.” This book is a little of this, a smidge of that, and a lot of fun.

Author David Leddick admits that he made up

some of what’s inside “The Beauty of Men Never Dies” and while some of the stories are easy to spot as such, readers are left wondering what part of this book is more than just imagination. In that respect, Leddick almost teases us, and since he has a droll wit that’s as dry as Death Valley and a keen eye for human foibles, we can happily go along with the joke.

And if that’s what you need this week (along with a few tears and some things that will make you think), then I think you need “The Beauty of Men Never Dies.”

When it comes to essays, stuff like this never grows old.

68 Pain in an orifice 69 Submits 70 New Jersey capital

2 Husband of 5-Down 3 Heartthrob’s fan 4 Elizabeth of Transamerica 5 Painter Kahlo 6 Electrical unit 7 Headstone letters 8 One of “Fifty Million Frenchmen”

He wants to have a sex life until he’s ninety.

Across

1 Hazard for Sheehan 5 Discussion venue 10 Computes the bottom line 14 Sally in space 15 River of Cologne 16 Theater chain name 17 Shakespeare’s stream 18 Push forward 19 Rick’s old flame 20 With 22-Across, star of 300 22 See 20-Across 24 Land of O. Wilde 25 Soap title character of the ‘70s 29 Prepare to shoot off 30 Ship’s load 32 “I Got Rhythm” writer Gershwin 33 Dessert trays 35 Like a bunch of blooming pansies 38 Star of The Hangover 42 Animal populations 43 Emerald Isle province 45 Muscle Mary’s pride 46 Interior design 50 Rare sports result 51 Raise the price of, at Barneys 54 Tat word, often 55 ___ Loa 57 Sports event where 20-Across and 38-Across were recently seen together 60 Brown known for colorful characters 63 Composer Bernstein 67 Aroused in bed

Q-PUZZLE: Bromance at Court

Down

1 Like Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet

9 Type of toast 10 Hit the ground 11 Susan B. Anthony coin 12 Where Priscilla is queen 13 Insect groups ruled by queens 21 Girl in a Beach Boys song 23 Dorky 26 Rub the wrong way 27 Reverend Perry 28 Opposite of fem.

31 Composer ___ Carlo Menotti 34 Roadies’ burdens 36 Ran, as colors 37 Tart-tasting 38 Sonny and Cher’s “I Got You ___” 39 Red-brown 40 Caesar’s last question 41 Jockey strap?

42 Way out 44 Breakfast on Pluto actor Stephen 47 Completely encloses 48 KFC rank 49 Brunch entree 52 Lammy, for one 53 Two-inch putt, e.g.

55 Julianne of The Hours 56 Kofi of the UN 58 Editor Roshan 59 Letter opener 60 Informer 61 Bonheur’s island 62 Catch some rays 64 Be in a cast 65 P on Socrates’ paper 66 Bear necessity

• SOLUTION ON PAGE 34

AUGUST 2013

The Fun Guide

ACCESSline Page 23 SScontinued from page 13

WIRED to see them, is harassment and could land you in legal hot water. So can sharing those pictures and messages without the permission of the original sender.

Your job and/or celebrity status is another important consideration. Politicians, educators and public figures are often held to a different standard than the general public.

What might be harmless fun for you might end the career of the gay swim coach you are dating. If you have special situations you need to discuss them with your partner before sexting.

Families can provide an extra dynamic as well. Even in an open relationship, having your spouse find pictures of your new plaything when they do a monthly backup of the shared data plan could be an awkward conversation. I think it should go without saying that your children should not have access to this kind of data. Again a vault app on your phone or hidden file on your computer can prevent a random slideshow of family pictures from turning into an awkward sex ed course with you as the star when your three year old points at the computer and chirps, “hey what’s second mommy doing with the turkey baster?”

In the end, like sex, there is only safer sext. What do you do when those pictures get around? There really is no good answer to that one. So the final consideration before you sext is, are you willing to own it? If a coworker finds a picture of your bound and gagged on some fetish website are you going to smile and say, “yup, that was a fun night”?

Everyone’s comfort level with their sexuality, their bodies and how public they are about both, is different. Before sharing any information on the web you need to be aware of the risks and decide how you will handle the consequences if things go wrong.

SScontinued from page 13

HONOR really necessary, wise or even true?

It’s true that milk is rich in calcium, vitamin D and has some protein. But that’s not all you’re getting. Most people are surprised by the amount of sugar in milk. A cup of 1% milk, for example, has 13 grams of sugar. It’s not added sugar, but still sugar nonetheless. Most guidelines recommend no more than 40–50 grams of sugar per day, and three servings of skim milk would almost reach that limit. And we’ve all seen the link between sugary drinks and obesity demonstrated time and time again.

Ludwig also cites a lack of evidence that reduced fat milks are any less likely to result in weight gain or other health outcomes when compared to whole milk. In fact, Ludwig speculates that when individuals drink reduced fat milk, they feel less full–and then consume more calories in other food. For example, if you’re drinking a glass of whole milk, one cookie may be sufficient. But if you’re drinking a glass of reduced fat milk, you feel less satisfied and may reach for a second cookie.

Yes, milk has some important nutrients–but it’s also entirely possible to get those nutrients from other foods and without all that sugar. And there are plenty of delicious and rich non-dairy alternatives that can serve as healthier replacements to dairy milk.

Questioning what we eat is a good thing and it’s important to occasionally take a few steps back from our diet for examination. While milk may not be as unhealthy as cake, candy or a glass of Coca Cola, it’s also not necessarily the wisest nutritional choice.

There was never going to be an actual ‘Ex-gay Pride Month’ because ex-gays are as rare as the Dodo bird.

They simply could not find real ‘ex-gays’ to participate and had to cancel to save face. This was nothing but a desperate publicity stunt intended to revive a failing industry that has repeatedly embarrassed anti-gay organizations.

~Wayne Besen, TWO’s Executive Director, in response to the cancellation of Voice of the Voiceless ex-gay pride month.

ACCESSline Page 24

The Fun Guide

AUGUST 2013

Section 3: Community

AUGUST 2013

From the Pastor’s Pen

by Rev. Jonathan Page

Along with the entire gay community and its supporters, I rejoiced in the Supreme Court’s decision to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act. For those of us in states that recognize gay marriage, we finally have our legal covenants recognized by the federal government. This is a huge victory for gay rights and will make a material difference in the lives of tens of thousands of gays and lesbians.

The decision also sets up a legal battle for recognition in the remainder of the United States, which should lead to universal marriage equality in the near future.

What a truly transformative moment for the movement!

In the midst of this well-deserved celebration, it is imperative that we also pause to consider consequences of our victories on gay marriage. For years there have been voices within the gay community expressing reservations that marriage equality had become the bellwether for gay rights. These critics complained that as soon as gay marriage became a reality, gays would be expected to be in committed, monogamous, life-long partnerships.

Those who chose not to get married would be marginalized and critiqued for their presumed immorality and issues with commitment . Sure enough, within weeks of the DOMA decision I saw this reality firsthand.

At the beginning of July the United Church of Christ gathered in Long Beach, CA for our biennial national gathering, what we call General Synod. Since the UCC was the first mainline Christian denomination to recognize gay marriage and has been a supporter of gay rights for decades, there was great celebration at the demise of DOMA. At General Synod a minister and his long time partner became one of the first California couples to get married since Prop 8 became law.

And it was at this same General Synod where I heard ministers openly criticize gay colleagues for being single and noncelibate. Their comments made it explicit that they considered it a moral obligation for gay clergy, and by extension lay people as well, to be either married or celibate.

That was the first time in the UCC that I felt condescending judgment from other clergy for being gay. I was shocked.

What makes this all the more surprising is that the UCC’s publishing house, Pilgrim Press, has for years printed books on gay and queer theology. The UCC, along with the Metropolitan Community Church, has had some of the best and most articulate gay voices within the church universal. At the core of queer theology is the rejection of moral judgment based on preconceived notions of sexuality and sexual expression. As Michel Foucault

Prime Timers of Central Iowa Prime Timers of Central Iowa, the Iowa chapter of Prime Timers World Wide, continues to grow and has expanded across Iowa and even across our borders. It has now launched its website: www.primetimersww.com/centraliowa/ Attendance at our monthly dinners has grown to fill our current space. Summer activities planned include attending an Iowa Cubs game, a pontoon boat party on Saylorville

The Demise of DOMA & the Death of Queer Theology

ACCESSline Page 25

Lake, and a country barbeque.

Mature gay/bi men are welcome to broaden their relationships with other men through a variety of activities. A monthly newsletter with a schedule of activities is available.

For more information contact: PrimeTimersIowa@gmail.com. Follow us on Facebook: www.facebook.com/PrimeTimersOfCentralIowa

PITCH Calendar 2013 FFBC member Jonathan Page is senior pastor of the Ames United Church of Christ, 217 6th Street, Ames, Iowa. Sunday service is at 10:45. He can be reached at jon@Amesucc.org. pointed out in his landmark work The History of Sexuality, Volume I, constructed categories of both sexual repression and liberation feed harmful power structures within society. According to Foucault’s analysis, regulating sexuality became a means of social control in modern societies. Ironically, the 1970s call for sexual liberation actually reinforced these means of social control. Sexual liberation became a political act, and one with serious class and power implications.

Foucault argued that we need to consider sexuality more holistically, and not just fetishize the sex act itself, if we are going to place sex in its appropriate moral and societal context.

Building on Foucault’s insights, if we take Jesus’ call for true spiritual liberation seriously, we must resist creating clearly delineated categories for licit and illicit sex. This is true for straight as well as gay people. Unexamined assumptions about sex predominate in society and actively harm people through unnecessary judgment, excessive repression, and ultimately self-destructive sexual behavior.

Gay Christians have been shouting this from the treetops for years. Stoic, NeoPlatonic, and ancient Hebraic notions of desire, marriage, and the body do not and should not dictate our sexual mores.

Period. Being slaves to an inherited and irrelevant Victorian morality does not lead to greater love of God or neighbor.

UCC clergy should know this and insist on clearer thinking around sex and sexuality.

As you can tell, I am still trying to process the implications of the demise of DOMA. If I find the right person and if we decide to get married, I am overjoyed that we will have the option of a legitimate civil marriage. At the same time I have witnessed the effects that the marriage equality struggle has had on expectations within the gay community. Ten years ago, before Massachusetts or the UCC General Synod had recognized the legitimacy of gay marriage; I would never have witnessed

Being slaves to an inherited and irrelevant Victorian morality does not lead to greater love of God or neighbor.

TTPAGE cont’d page 32

Positive Iowans Taking Charge (PITCH) is a volunteer-run non-profit organization, founded in 2007, their goal is to provide social networking and support to Iowans living with, or affected by, HIV/AIDS. Their mission is to create an atmosphere where HIV+ people can unite, advocate, and assist other HIV+ people for better health and wellness.

More information can be found at pitchiowa.org or call Tami Haught at 641-715-4182.

All of our meetings are open to the public at large. To hear what’s going on, please check out our calendar to see when the next PITCH meeting will be held. For more information go to www.PitchIowa.org.

Groups

Des Moines Open Support Group 5pm-6pm (Wednesdays) Thursday Group 2pm-3pm (Thursdays) Waterloo PITCH Support Group 6pm-8pm (Every other week) Wednesday Evening Group 5:30pm-6:30pm (Every other week)

Support Group Meeting Conference Call Positive Iowans Taking Charge has a Conference Call Support Group meeting every month and it is open to those outside of Iowa.

The meeting is to provide emotional, social, and educational opportunities for Iowans across the state. The Agenda is as follows: welcome and introduction from 7-7:30 PM, topic discussion from 7:30-8 PM,

non-topic time for everyone to share how they are doing from 8-8:30 PM. Times are adjusted depending on the needs of the people on the call.

The number to call is 949-812-4500 and the Pin number is 684713 that everyone will use the same code. For more information go to pitchiowa.org or find them on facebook.

ACCESSline Page 26

Section 3: Community

AUGUST 2013

Warren’s Words by Warren J. Blumenfeld Representative Steve King Should Resign

“For everyone who’s a valedictorian, there’s another 100 out there that weigh 130 pounds and they’ve got calves the size of cantaloupes because they’re hauling 75 pounds of marijuana across the desert.

Those people would be legalized with the same act.” U.S. Representative from Iowa’s Fourth Congressional District, Steve King, interviewed

by Newsmax July 23, 2013 regarding his opposition to allowing undocumented youth a pathway toward U.S. citizenship.

If U.S. Representative Steve King simply opened his mouth and inserted his foot, at least he wouldn’t be able to utter a word. Instead, King’s modus operandi is to stereotype, scapegoat, and offend entire groups of people while simultaneously embarrassing his constituents, the state of Iowa, the national Republican Party, and the United States in its dealings with nations around the world.

Before I moved from Iowa this past May, though Steve King was elected in my congressional district, he certainly did not represent me nor did he serve anyone else, including the good people who for some unfathomable reason voted for him.

King not only recently equated

undocumented youth with drug-hauling pack mules, but he has repeatedly represented people south of the U.S. border as other forms of animal life. For example, referring to the border fence: “We could also electrify this wire (on the border) with the kind of current that would not kill somebody, but it would simply be a discouragement for them to be fooling around with it. We do that with livestock all the time.” (http:// thinkprogress.org/poli-

If U.S. Representative Steve King simply opened his mouth and inserted his foot, at least he wouldn’t be able to utter a word.

tics/2006/07/13/6259/kingfence/?mobile=nc) King also associated immigration laws with choosing the best dog from the litter: “You put out a beacon like the Statue of Liberty, and who comes here? The most vigorous from every country that has donated legal immigrants to America.

The cream of the crop. We’ve always had bird dogs around our place. In our family there’s a black lab and white lab, a yellow lab, and my brother has a chocolate lab.

Well, you go in and you look at a litter of pups, and you watch them. You watch how they play—they run around a little bit—and what do you want? You want a good bird dog, and you want one that’s gonna be aggressive? Pick the one that’s the friskiest, the one that’s in games the most—not the one that’s over there sleep-

Ask Lambda Legal By Susan Sommer After DOMA: What Does it Mean for You?

Q: Now that DOMA is gone what will it mean for my family?

A: The victory at the Supreme Court was an amazing time for our community but we also know there will be a lot of questions in the weeks and months ahead.

There are more than 1,100 places in federal law where a protection or responsibility is based on marital status. Federal agencies—large bureaucracies—may need and take some time to change forms, implement procedures, train personnel, and efficiently incorporate same-sex

couples into the spousal-based system.

Until same-sex couples can marry in every state in the nation, there will be uncertainty about the extent to which same-sex spouses will receive federal marital-based protections nationwide. For federal programs that assess marital status based on the law of a state that does not respect marriages of same-sex couples, those state laws will likely pose obstacles

ing in the corner…. [S]o, you get the pick of the litter, you got yourself a pretty good bird dog….” (http://www.liveleak.com/ view?i=644_1337727965) King showed his hand on how he considered people different from himself when speaking to supporters on August 21, 2012 at a Le Mars, Iowa, Town Hall meeting when he argued that the promotion of the concept of multiculturalism will ultimately bring about the demise of the United States as we know it. King conjured up a supposed deep-seated and sinister plot to ensnare young and impressionable first-year college students into campus multicultural groups for the purpose of turning them into victims, which will convince them to work toward the eventual overthrow of the social and political power structure.

King talked about preparing for a debate some time ago at the Iowa State University campus on the concept of multiculturalism. He checked out the university’s website: “I typed in ‘multicultural,’” he stated, “and it came back to me at the time, 59 different multicultural groups listed to do to operate on campus at Iowa State….And most of them were victims’ groups, victimology, people who feel sorry for themselves.” (http://www. youtube.com/watch?feature=player_ embedded&v=_ukvj7QA-wU) He warned that these groups are “out there recruiting our young people to be part of the group who are feeling sorry for themselves….But just think of 59 card

for legally married couples and surviving spouses in accessing federal protections and responsibilities.

Depending on the benefit couples are seeking, the federal government approach to recognizing married same-sex couples varies. For example, some benefits like veteran’s benefits are guided by whether a couple lives in a state that recognizes their marriage while other benefits like spousal immigration rights are based on whether or not the state in which the couple married recognizes their marriage as valid. And for issues like filing federal taxes, we expect more guidance from the IRS for how couples in civil unions should proceed.

Lambda Legal along with 10 other national LGBT advocacy organizations jointly issued a series of factsheets to provide guidance to same-sex couples and their families as they navigate accessing federal rights, benefits, and protections.

The fact sheets are intended to provide general information regarding major areas of federal marriage-based rights and protections offered by federal agencies. Before making a decision, it is essential that same-sex couples consult an attorney for individualized legal advice.

People must make careful decisions when

Warren J. Blumenfeld is author of Warren’s Words: Smart Commentary on Social Justice (Purple Press); editor of Homophobia: How We All Pay the Price (Beacon Press), and co-editor of Readings for Diversity and Social Justice (Routledge) and Investigating Christian Privilege and Religious Oppression in the United States (Sense). www.warrenblumenfeld.com tables set up across the parking lot on the way to the dorm….And the first group says, ‘Well, you’re a victim that fits us. We want to help you. Why don’t you join us?’....And then you’re brought into a group that has a grievance against society rather than understand there’s a tremendous blessing in this society.”

Though King attended Northwest Missouri State University from 1967 to 1970, taking courses toward a career as a wildlife officer, he never completed his degree. His political career officially began when he won election to the Iowa Senate sitting from 1996-2002. While there, he was instrumental in passing the law

TTBLUMENFELD continued page 31

Depending on the benefit couples are seeking, the federal government approach to recognizing married same-sex couples varies.

Susan Sommer, Director of Constitutional Litigation, Lambda Legal. and where to marry, even as advocates work towards equality. Visit: lambdalegal. org/publications/after-doma to learn more. Certain fact sheets are available in Spanish.

Fact Sheets created by: American Civil Liberties Union, Center for American Progress, Family Equality Council, Freedom to Marry, Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders, Human Rights Campaign, Immigration Equality, Lambda Legal, National Center for Lesbian Rights, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force and OutServe-SLDN. If you feel you have been discriminated against based on your sexual orientation, gender identity or HIV status please contact our Legal Help Desk http://www. lambdalegal.org/help.

AUGUST 2013

Section 3: Community SScontinued from page 7

WARREN’S WORDS sexism and male privilege, in fact, not only fortifies but, indeed, strengthens this form of oppression and privilege by perpetuating patriarchal hegemony in such a way as to avoid detection.

In other words, male dominance is maintained by its relative invisibility, and with this invisibility, privilege is neither analyzed nor scrutinized, neither interrogated nor confronted by many. Dominance is perceived as unremarkable or “normal,” and when anyone poses a challenge or attempts to reveal its true impact and significance, those in the dominant group brand them as “subversive” or even “accuse” them of being “overly critical.”

Possibly those who make these accusa-

SScontinued from page 21

DOVESLAND number of years and worked with both queens and kings while I was a member of the Imperial Court of Kentucky. My drag daughter got me hooked on the large rhinestone earrings and necklaces and I can’t wait to start making those types of pieces. I also like the idea of making feminine pieces in larger sizes to accommodate men’s sizes while making masculine pieces on a smaller scale to accommodate women’s sizes. It may seem trivial, but finding the right accessories to complete a look in the proper size proportions can enhance the gender illusion you are trying to create.

Julius Fever and Hugh Jindapants of the I.C. Kings. Julius sporting a Dovesland Creation.

I noticed the I.C. Kings have performed wearing Dovesland Creations. What piece(s) did they find popular?

Beccie: Well, we aren’t sure what they found to be popular because we haven’t asked them. We were lucky to make friends with this amazing group of women and performers.

Back in February, Robin and I came up with the idea to give them each a ‘goodie bag’ when we drove down for one of their shows. Each bag contained a piece from Robin and one from me that was inspired by each of the kings. We took that ever further this summer when we started on the pride collection by creating pieces inspired by their mustache logo.

Robin: We came up with the idea of making a monocle style mustache pin. I made the mustaches out of Perler with a chain attached. Each one had a magnet so it could be worn as a pin on the chest or removed to pull it up under the nose. We watched their performances on YouTube, which we still do monthly, and couldn’t resist. Beccie made each of them an ear cuff in their favorite color.

We collaborated on a leather collar with a rhinestone mustache for Miss Kitty. Those are some of my favorite pieces we’ve made so far

ACCESSline Page 27 tions are not themselves sufficiently aware or critical.

I have heard some people refer to our current times as a “post-Feminist” era, where sexism and male privilege no longer impose major social barriers.

They are referring to “Feminism,” which can be defined as the cultural, political, economic, and civil rights movement for the advancement of equality and equity for between the sexes.

For me this brings to mind a clever and I believe insightful bumper sticker produced by the National Association for Women: “I’ll be Post-Feminist in the Post-Patriarchy.” Unfortunately, as we can clearly see in the Iowa decision, but also in very subtle but devastating ways, the patriarchy is still alive and fully functioning. because they were truly unique and customized for them. Heck, we’ve recently started naming our pieces and several are named after members of the I.C. Kings and their partners.

As far as popular, most of them have purchased an ear cuff or still wear the one they were given so perhaps that would be the answer. The nice part about the ear cuffs is they are unisex and are good for on stage as well as off. Jayden Knight of the New Kings on the Block has several of our ear cuffs that he has worn while performing.

In doing commission work, what order uniquely stands out in your memory?

Beccie: Our custom pieces range from absolutely adorably sweet to a little strange but we like it all the same. It’s the latter that stands out the most in my memory. At Cedar Rapids Pride last year, we met a young man named Brandon. Not only did we sell him some jewelry at that time but I also did a tarot reading for him at that festival. Brandon and I’ve kept in touch throughout the course of this past year and about two months before this year’s festival Brandon requested that I make him a custom pendant. I was thrilled to do so especially knowing that he was going through a particularly rough time and was excited to make something for him that I could infuse with Reiki energy. His only specifications were something Goth and something gay. I had to turn to my partner in crime, Robin, since she is the resident Goth of the group and we came up with a spider web pendant with rainbow crystals woven into the web. Brandon was absolutely thrilled with his custom piece and I loved the look in his eye when he first saw it; knowing that I made someone so happy with something I made is why I do what I do.

Robin: Nothing is more fun than to get a phone call at 10PM at night saying, “I need something gay and Goth. What do I do?” We’ve done quite a few repairs and custom requests which have all been nice. For me, my favorite so far has to be the Perler hair bows I made for each of the girls we worked with on the anti-bullying project. Unbeknownst to them, I got their favorite colors from their group sponsor and when we gave them to them, we told them that when they passed each other in the hallway and saw that bow, they would know that while they are each special and unique, they are a group that can support one another. I like to think that when they see them, or think back on it when they are older, they’ll remember the work we did with them and that at least two people in the world care about them and are their friends.

For more information go to Facebok.com/ DoveslandCreations.

ACCESSline Page 28 DIRECTORY NOTICE

The ACCESSline community directory is updated each issue. LISTINGS ARE FREE but are limited by space.

Free online listings are available at www.ACCESSlineAMERICA.com.

Information about new listings must contain a phone number for publication and a contact (e-mail address, land address, or website) for our records. For more information or to provide corrections, please contact Editor@ACCESSlineAMERICA.com or call (712) 560-1807.

The ACCESSline is expanding our resource directory to include heartland resources outside of Iowa. Please bear with us as we continue improving our resource directory.

NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS

Breur Media Corporation : Website Consultation, Design, Programming, and Hosting.

HIV and STD Testing Sites near You, including places where you can get tested for free: hivtest.org/ Crisis or Suicide National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: suicidepreventionlifeline.org Information on Mental Health National Alliance on Mental Illness: nami.org Counseling, Information and Resources about Sexual Orientation GLBT National Help Center: glnh.org or 1-888-843-4564 Information on Mental Health for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender nami.org Information on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Health, cdc.gov Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund 1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350, Washington, DC 20005, victoryfund.org 202-VICTORY [842-8679] Human Rights Campaign, National political organization, lobbies congress for lesbian & gay issues, political training state and local, hrc.org, 1-800-777HRCF[4723] Lambda Legal Defense & Education Fund I I E. Adams, Suite 1008, Chicago, IL 60603 lambdalegal.org, 312-663-4413 National Gay & Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF) - ngltf.org - taskforce.org 1325 Massachusetts Ave NW, Ste 600, Washington, DC, 20005 National Organization for Women (NOW) 733 15th ST NW, 2nd Floor Washington, DC 20005, now.org 202-628-8669 PFLAG National Offices 1133 15th Street NW, Suite 350, Washington, DC 20005, info@pflag.org - pflag.org, 202467-8180 The Trevor Lifeline |Crisis and suicide prevention lifeline for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth. (866) 4-U-TREVOR - (866) 488-7386 Open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. All calls are toll-free and confidential - thetrevorproject.org/

IOWA ORGANIZATIONS

Diviners of God Support line for ex-Amish & ex-Mennonite.

402-328-3229, evenings & afternoons.

Equality Iowa P.O. Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125, equalityiowa.org - 515-537-3126 Faithful Voices Interfaith Alliance of Iowa’s marriage equality project. faithfulvoices.org Imperial Court of Iowa Non-profit fundraising & social, statewide organization with members from across the State of Iowa.

PO Box 1491, Des Moines, IA 50306-1491 imperialcourtofiowa.org Iowa Chapter of the National Organization for Women (NOW) Janis Bowden, President, IA NOW janleebow@aol.com PO Box 41114, Des Moines, IA 503111 Iowa Gay Rodeo Association (IAGRA) 921 Diagonal Rd, Malcom, IA 50157 polebender60@yahoo.com 641-990-1411

Section 3: Community Iowa PFLAG (Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gay) State Council, PO Box 18, Indianola, IA 50125 http://community.pflag.org/Page. aspx?pid=194&srcid=-2 515-537-3126 or 641-583-2024 Iowa Pride Network 777 Third Street, Suite 312, Des Moines, Iowa 50309 - Iowapridenetwork.org, Executive Director: 515-471-8062, Outreach Coordinator: 515-471-8063 LGBT Youth in Iowa Schools Task Force PO Box 1997, Des Moines, 50306 515-243-1221 One Iowa 500 East Locust St, Ste 300, Des Moines, IA 50309 - 515-288-4019 - OneIowa.org The Quire Eastern Iowa’s GLBT chorus, thequire.org

NEBRASKA ORGANIZATIONS (LIST IN PROGRESS)

Citizens For Equal Protection-402-398-3027 1105 Howard St, Suite #2, Omaha, NE 68102. cfep-ne.org - info@cfep-ne.org The Imperial Court of Nebraska Meets the third Monday of Every month at the Rainbow Outreach Resource Center at 17th and Leavenworth in Omaha, NE. Meetings start at 6pm and are open to the public.

PO Box 3772, Omaha, NE 68103 Nebraska AIDS Project Omaha Office (Home Office) 250 South 77th Street Suite A Omaha, NE 68114 (402) 552-9260 - Email us: info@nap.org (also serving Southwest Iowa)

AMES, IOWA

First United Methodist Church 516 Kellogg Ave, Ames, IA 50010, Contemporary worship Sat 5:30; Sun 8:30 & 11am acswebnetworks.com/firstunitedmcames/ 515-232-2750 ISU LGBTA Alliance GLBT Support, Activism, Social Events, Newsletter - 515-344-4478 L East Student Office Space,2229 Lincoln Way, Ames, IA 50014-7163, alliance@iastate. edu - alliance.stuorg.iastate.edu Living with HIV Program, MICA 230 SE 16th Street, Ames, IA 50010, Ask for Helen (Director), 515-956-3333 ext. 106 or 800-890-8230 Lord of Life Lutheran - 515-233-2350 2126 Gable Lane, Ames 50014, Services Sundays at 9:00a.m.; Wed. 7:00pm.

PFLAG Ames Youth and Shelter Services Offices, 2328 Bristol Drive, Ames, IA 5001, 2nd Tuesday, 7pm - pflagames.org 515-291-3607 Romantics Pleasure Palace 117 Kellogg Street, Ames, IA 50010-3315 romantixonline.com 515-232-7717 United Church of Christ-Congregational 217 6th Street, Ames, Iowa, 50010, Sunday Continental Breakfast, 9:00am; Sunday School, 9:30am; Worship 10:45am. office@ amesucc.org 515-232-9323 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Ames 1015 Hyland Ave. Summer services: 10:00 am, Sunday. Services 10 a.m. for the rest of the summer. Contact uufa@uufames.org and www.uufames.org or call 515-231-8150.

Also, the email and website are uufa@ uufames.org and www.uufames.org Unity Church of Ames - unityofames.com 226 9th St, Ames, IA 50010-6210, Sunday service and Sunday school 10:30am.

Wednesday mediation 6:30pm Daily dial-a-blessing 515-233-1613

ARNOLDS PARK, OKOBOJI, SPENCER, SPIRIT LAKE, IOWA

The Royal Wedding Chapel 504 Church Street, Royal, IA 51357 712-933-2223 TheRoyalWeddingChapel.com Wilson Resource Center An Iowa Great Lakes area gay-owned, nonprofit community based organization. PO Box 486, 597 W. Okoboji Rd., Arnolds Park IA 51331-0486 - 712-332-5043 F.JosephWilson@aol.com. wilsonresource. org

BURLINGTON, IOWA

Arrowhead Motel - arrowheadia.com 2520 Mount Pleasant St, Burlington, IA 52601-2118 - 319-752-6353 Faith Lutheran Church E L C A 3109 Sunnyside Ave, Burlington, IA 52601 HIV/AIDS Screening @ Des Moines County Health Department in Burlington, 522 N 3rd By appointment between 8:00am to 4:30 319-753-8217 Confidential

RISQUES IV (adult store) 421 Dry Creek Ave, West Burlington, IA 52601 (319) 753-5455, Sun - Wed 8am-Midnight Thurs - Sat Open 24 Hours, LoversPlayground.com Steve’s Place 852 Washington St, Burlington, 319-7545868 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Services start at 10:30 am, 625 N 6th St, Burlington, IA 52601-5032, (319) 753-1895 uuburlington.org

CEDAR FALLS - WATERLOO, IOWA

Adult Cinema 315 E 4th St, Waterloo, IA 50703-4703, (319) 234-7459 Black Hawk Co. Health Department Free HIV testing (donations accepted); MW, 1:00pm to 3:00pm; Thurs, 1:00pm to 4:45pm 1407 Independence Ave. (5th fl), Waterloo 50703 319-291 -2413 Cedar AIDS Support System (CASS) Service, support groups & trained volunteers for persons with HIV/AIDS in Waterloo/CF call Elizabeth or Karla, 319-272-AIDS(2437). cvhospice@forbin.net Cedar Valley Counseling Services Promoting personal growth and development in a strengths-based environment, Joan E. Farstad, MA, Director. 319-240-4615, cvcounseling.com farstd@cvcounseling.com.

Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry.

In Lutheran Center, 2616 College St, Cedar Falls, IA - 319-415-5747, mcdinoiwa@aol. com, episcopalcampus.org Community AIDS Assistance Project (CAAP) - PO Box 36, Waterloo, IA 50704 LGBTA Support Group at Hawkeye Community College, Call Carol at 319-296-4014 or carol.hedberg@hawkeyecollege.edu Iowa Legal Aid Free civil legal service available to low income persons who qualify under income/asset guidelines.

607 Sycamore, #206, Waterloo, IA 50703 1-800-772-0039 or 319-235-7008 Kings & Queens 304 W. 4th St, Waterloo, IA, 319-232-3001 Romantix Waterloo (Adult Emporium) 1507 La Porte Rd, Waterloo, IA 50702 319-234-9340, romantixonline.com Stellas Guesthouse 324 Summit Ave, Waterloo, IA Private B&B, Overnight accommodations for adults only. 319-232-2122 St. Lukes Episcopal Church - 319-277-8520 2410 Melrose Dr, Cedar Falls, IA 50613 Services: Sunday 8:00 & 10:15, Thurs 11:30 st-lukes-episcopal.org St. Timothys United Methodist Church 3220 Terrace Drive, Cedar Falls, 50613 sttims-umc.org, 319-266-0464, info@sttimsumc-org, “Welcome of all persons, including those of all sexual orientations and gender identities.”

Together For Youth 233 Vold Dr, Waterloo, IA 50703, TogetherForYouth.net 319-274-6768 UNI-LGBTA Alliance-Student Organization, 244A Bartlet Hall, University of Northern Iowa, Cedar Falls 50613 - lgbta@uni.edu 319-222-0003 United Church of Christ Cedar Falls 9204 University Avenue, Cedar Falls 319-366-9686 Unitarian Universalist Society of Black Hawk County - 319-266-5640 3912 Cedar Heights Dr, Cedar Falls, IA

CEDAR RAPIDS/MARION, IOWA

Adult Shop 630 66th Ave SW, 319-362-4939 Adult Shop North 5539 Crane Lane, 319-294-5360 CRPrideFest (formerly Cedar Rapids Unity) Social activities, non-profit Pride festival organization. PO Box 1643 Cedar Rapids 52406-1643 - CRPrideFest.com Christ Episcopal Church “We have a place for you.” 220 40th Street NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52404, 319-363-2029 ChristEpiscopal.org Belle’s Basix - 319-363-3194 Open 5pm to 2am M-F, Sat & Sun 3pm-2am 3916 1st Ave NE, Cedar Rapids Club CO2, A GLBTQA Nightclub, 616 2nd Ave SE, 319-365-0225, Open 7 days a week 4PM-2AM, Happy hour from 4-8 pm, clubco2.com

Coe Alliance GLBTQ and straight students, staff and people from the community. Coe College, 1220 First Ave NE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52402. coealliance@coe.edu or Erica Geers, faculty advisor at 319-8616025 Community Health Free Clinic 947 14th Avenue SE, Cedar Rapids, IA 52401 - 319-363-0416 - communityhfc.org Free Medical Services provided for the uninsured and underserved patients of Cedar Rapids, Marion and the surrounding areas in Eastern Iowa.

CSPS Legion Arts Contemporary Arts Center - 319-364-1580 1103 3rd St. SE, info@legionarts.org Diversity Focus, 222 2nd Street SE, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52401, 319-363-3707, DiversityFocus.org, Lead in the promotion of diversity, cultural awareness, and inclusion in the Corridor community.

Eden United Church of Christ 351 8th Ave SW, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404 (319) 362-7805 Sunday School 9am - Worship 10:15am Foundation 2 Crisis Counseling 24-hour telephone crisis counseling. f2crisis@aol.com or www.f2online.org 1540 2nd Ave. SE Cedar Rapids, IA 319-362-2174 or 800-332-4224 Linn County Public Health 501 13th NW, Free confidential HIV testing, 319-892-6000 Linn County Stonewall Democrats For more info, contact linnstonewall@ gmail. com People’s Church Unitarian Universalist A welcoming congregation. 4980 Gordon Ave NW, Cedar Rapids, IA, 11am Sunday. 319362-9827 - peoplesuu.org PFLAG CR, Linn Co and Beyond Support Group meets on the 4th Thursday at 7pm except for Nov Dec - call for details.

319-431-0673, pflaglcb@gmail.com The Linn County Stonewall Democrats Meet 2nd Wednesdays, Blue Strawberry, 118 2nd St SE in Cedar Rapids, IA. Contact Harvey S. Ross, HRoss007@aol.com.

Tri-ess, Iota Kappa Phi Chapter P.O. Box 8605, Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52408 We are a transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends.

- ri-ess.org, 319-390-6376, georgia523@ yahoo.com - marlenemarschel@yahoo.com Unity Center of Cedar Rapids “A center of positive, practical Christianity.”

4980 Gordon NE, Cedar Rapids unitycr.org - (319) 393-5422

CLINTON, IOWA

18 and Beyond (aka ABC Books), 135 5th Ave South, 563-242-7687 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Clinton 309 30th Avenue North, Clinton, IA 52732 (563) 242-4972 - uuclinton.org, Sunday services at 10:30 (year-round), Where YOUR spiritual and ethical journey is welcome! Rev. Ruby Nancy, minister

COUNCIL BLUFFS, IOWA

Council Bluffs Community Alliance “…will promote the city of Council Bluffs as a developing gay, lesbian, bisexual & transgender family community, & to assure the equality of all Council Bluffs’ residents.”

CouncilBluffsCommunityAlliance.org Council Bluffs NOW PO Box 3325, Omaha, NE 68103-0325 Romantix Council Bluffs (North) (Adult Emporium) 3216 1st Ave, Council Bluffs, IA 51501-3353-romantixonline.com515-955-9756 Romantix Council Bluffs (South) (Romantix After Dark) 50662 189th St, Council Bluffs, IA 51503 romantixonline.com, 712-366-1764

DECORAH, IOWA

Decorah Human Rights Commission Contact: City Clerk, 400 Clairborne Dr, Decorah, 563-382-3651, Meetings: First Tuesdays, 5:30pm Luther College Student Congregation Contact Office for College Ministry 700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101, 563-3871040.

Luther College PRIDE-Diversity Center, 700 College Dr, Decorah, IA 52101 Contact Charles 563-210-6570 PFLAG Northeast IA (Waukon/Decorah) Meets 4th Monday of the month at 7 PM in Northeast Iowa Peace and Justice Center, 119 Winnebago St., Decorah. Contact Ellen C. at 563-380-4626.

AUGUST 2013 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship Meets alternating Sundays at 10:30am, Decorah Senior Center, 806 River St, Call Bill at 563-382-3458.

DES MOINES, IOWA

AIDS Project of Central Iowa Free HIV testing, prevention supplies, care services, food pantry, information. 711 E. 2nd, Des Moines, IA 50309, 515-284-0245 Blazing Saddle 416 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA theblazingsaddle.com - 515-246-1299 Buddies Corral 418 E 5th St, Des Moines, IA - 515-244-7140 Church of the Holy Spirit-MCC, Interim Pastor Peter Trabaris - Sunday service 11am at the 1st Christian Church, 2500 University (2nd floor chapel), Des Moines, IA, Facebook. com/CHSMCC, chsmccdmia@aol.com, 515-287-9787 Des Moines Diversity Chorus [A gay-friendly mixed chorus] Rehearsals on Mondays at 7 p.m. at Westminster Presbyterian Church, Beaver Ave. at Franklin St., Des Moines.

All are welcome, no auditions.

PO Box 65312, West Des Moines, IA 50265, Julie Murphy, Artistic Director jahmurphy@hotmail.com, 515-255-3576, desmoinesdiversitychorus.org Des Moines Gay Men’s Chorus 515-953-1540, 4126 Ingersoll Ave, Des Moines - administrator@dmgmc.org Des Moines Pride Center @ One Iowa (temporary location) 419 SW, 8th St., Des Moines, IA 50309 Family Practice Center - 515-953-7560 Safe, supportive LGBT health care. 200 Army Post Road, Ste 26, ppgi.org First Friday Breakfast Club Educational breakfast club for gay/bisexual men. Meets first Friday of each month. Contact Jonathan Wilson for meeting topic and place. 515-288-2500 info@ffbciowa.org ffbciowa.org First Unitarian Church 1800 Bell Avenue, Services Sundays at 9:30 & 11am - 515-244-8603, ucdsm.org Franklin Family Practice Dr. Joe Freund, MD 4908 Franklin Ave., Des Moines, IA 50310 515-280-4930, ucsinformation@ucsdsm.org, UCSOnline.org/FranklinFamilyPractice The Gallery (adult store) 1000 Cherry St, Des Moines, IA 50309-4227 - (515) 244-2916 Open 24 Hrs, LoversPlayground.com The Garden 112 SE 4th Des Moines, IA, 515-243-3965 Wed-Sun. 8pm-2am grdn.com Gay & Lesbian AA & AI-Anonymous Mon 7pm; Tue-Thu 6pm; Sat. 5:30pm, at Drake Ministries in Ed. Bldg. 28th & University Gay and Lesbian Issues Committee 4211 Grand Avenue, Level-3, Des Moines, IA 50312 - 515-277-1117 Lavender Victory Fund Financial assistance for women in need for medical emergencies. lavendervf@aol.com Le Boi Bar 508 Indianola Rd, Des Moines, IA Liberty Gifts 333 E. Grand Ave, Loft 105, Des Moines, IA Gay owned specialty clothing, jewelry, home decor. 515-508-0825 MINX Show Palace - 515-266-2744 1510 NE Broadway, Des Moines, IA 50313 North Star Gay Rodeo Association of IGRA, Iowa Division of North Star, NSGRA@ NSGRA.org or 612-82-RODEO Primary Health Care Inc., David Yurdin, 2353 SE 14th St., Des Moines, 503020, Works with GLBT ages 16 to geriatric, 25 years of experience. 515-248-1427 Rainbow Union, Drake University ru@drake.edu PFLAG Des Moines - 515-243-0313 1300 Locust , Des Moines, IA 50312 Plymouth Congregational UCC Church and the Plymouth GLBT Community 4126 Ingersoll Ave. 515-255-3149 Services at 9am & I lam Sunday. PlymouthGLBT.com Polk County Health Department Free STD, HIV, and Hepatitis B & C testing.

HIV. Rapid testing also offered. 1907 Carpenter, Des Moines, IA, 515-286-3798.

Pride Alliance, AIB College of Business Gay and straight students celebrating diversity. Contact: Mike Smith, Advisor, PrideAlliance@aib.edu - aib.edu/pride Pride Bowling League for GLBT & Supporters - Every Wednesday, 7 PM, Air Lanes Bowling Center 4200 Fleur Drive, Des Moines, IA 50321-2389. Email pridebowlingleague@gmail.com or 515-447-2977.

TTDIRECTORY cont’d page 29

AUGUST 2013 SScontinued from page 28

DIRECTORY

Raccoon River Resort Accommodations for men, women, or mixed in campgrounds, lodge, Teepees or Treehouses. Reservations: 515-996-2829 or 515-279-7312 Ritual Café - ritualcafe.com On 13th between Grand and Locust.

Gay owned, great music, awesome food & coffee. 515-288-4872 ritualcafe@aol.com Romantix North Des Moines Iowa (Bachelor’s Library) 2020 E Euclid Ave, Des Moines, IA 50317, romantixonline.com 515266-7992 Spouses of Lesbians & Gays Support group for spouses of gays and lesbians. 515-277-7754 St. John’s Lutheran Church 600 6th Ave “A Church for All People.”

Services Sat 5pm, Sun 7:45, 8:45 & 11am.

See web page for other services.

515-243-7691 - StJohnsDSM.org TransformationsIOWA Meets every Wednesday at 7pm, 2nd saturday of each month at 1pm at OneIowa, 419 SW 8th St, Des Moines, IA. For more information email sophia.transformations@gmail.com or call 515-288-4019 x200 Trinity United Methodist Church 1548 Eighth Street - 515-288-4056 Services Sundays 10am, trinityumcdm.org Urbandale UCC - An open & affirming congregation. 3530 70th St., Urbandale, IA 50322, 515-276-0625, urbucc.org Walnut Hills UMC Join us at 8:30 or 10:45am for Sunday worship. Sunday classes & group studies at 9:30am. 515-270-9226, 12321 Hickman Rd, Urbandale, IA 50323, whumc.org Westminster Presbyterian Church 4114 Allison Ave - WestPres.org Sunday services 8:45 and 11am. Of note is their GAY-LESBIAN-STRAIGHT AFFIRMATION GROUP, GLSA 515-274-1534 Women’s Culture Collective (WCC) A lesbian social group. Des Moines, IA iowawcc.org Word of God Ministries, Sunday service: 3:00pm, at 3120 E 24th Street, Des Moines, Iowa 50317, Gay, lesbian & straight affirmation 515-707-5947.

Zanzibar’s Coffee Adventure Open daily. Gay-friendly, 515-244-7694 2723 Ingersoll, Des Moines, IA

DUBUQUE, IOWA

920 Main 920 Main St., Dubuque, Iowa 52001, Tue Sat: 8:00 pm - 2:00 am, (563) 583-2121 or dbq.gaybar@hotmail.com Adult Warehouse - 563-588-9814 975 Jackson St, Dubuque, IA Dubuque Friends Worship Group (Quakers) Join us at an unprogrammed worship service on Sunday at 10am. Welcoming and Affirming, 563-582-9388 St. Mark’s Community Center, 1201 White Street, Dubuque, Iowa 52001 Rainbow Pride support and socialization group.

For members of the LGBT+ community who want to expand their social circle, get support for LGBT specific issues, & help with advocacy. Meets Mondays at 1pm Hillcrest Wellness Center 225 W 6th St., Dubuque, IA 563-690-1239 PFLAG Dubuque/Tri-State Carnegie Stout Library, 3rd Floor Conference Room, 360 W. 11th St. 3rd Tuesday, 7pm 563-581-4606 Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Dubuque - “The uncommon denomination.” general services at 10am. 1699 Iowa St, Dubuque, IA uuf-dbq.org 563-583-9910

ELKADER, IOWA

Bethany Church (ELCA) - 563-245-1856 307 3rd St. NE, Elkader, IA 52043 Inclusive. Welcoming. A ‘ReconcilingWorks’ congregation. www.bethanychurchelkader.org bethanychurch@alpinecom.net Schera’s Restaurant & Bar 107 S Main St, Elkader, IA 52043, Scheras.com, E-mail: info@scheras.com Fine dining featuring Algerian & American Cuisine. 563-245-1992

FORT DODGE, IOWA

Romantix Fort Dodge (Mini Cinema) Sun-Thu 10am-12am, Fri & Sat 10am-2am 15 N. 5th St, Fort Dodge, IA 50501-3801 RomantixOnline.com - 515-955-9756

Section 3: Community GRINNELL, IOWA

Broadviewwildflowerseed.com, Broad View Wildflower Seed, 428 Hamilton Ave., Grinnell, Iowa 50112, Manager/Owner: John C., chicoski7@yahoo.com Saints Ephrem & Macrina Sunday services at 10am. (Affiliated with the Orthodox-Catholic Church of America.)

Divine Liturgy is served Sundays during the College academic year 1:30 p.m., Herrick Chapel, Grinnell College Campus, 1226 Broad Street, Grinnell, IA, 641-236-0936 Stonewall Resource Center Open 4:30pm to 11:30pm, Sun through Thurs and by Appointment., Grinnell College, 1210 Park Street PO Box B-1, Grinnell, IA, 50112, srcenter@ grinnell.edu 641-269-3327 United Church of Christ-Congregational, ‘An open and affirming church.’ 902 Broad St, 641-236-3111

INDIANOLA, IOWA

Crossroads United Church of Christ (UCC) An Open & affirming congregation. Services: Sunday 10:30am, Summer worship: June, July, Aug, @ 9:30 am, worshiping in the Lounge at Smith Chapel, Simpson College, corner of Buxton and Clinton. Mailing address: P.O. Box 811, Indianola, IA 50125 515-961-9370. crossroadsucc.org

IOWA CITY, IOWA

AA (GLBT) 319-338-9111 Meetings Sundays 5 - 6pm at First Baptist Church, 500 North Clinton Street. For more info, call IC Intergroup Answering Service, Congregational Church UCC An Open and Affirming Congregation, Sunday Worship 10:15 a.m.

30 N Clinton St (across from Ul Pentacrest) 319-337-4301 - uiccic.org Counseling Clinic 319-354-6238 Lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender sensitive and supportive counseling for individuals, couples, families and groups. Sliding Fee. 505 E Washington St., Iowa City, IA 52240 Counseling and Health Center Client-centered therapy. Les-Bi-Gay-Trans always welcome. 616 Bloomington St, Iowa City, IA - 319-337-1679 Crisis Center 319-351-0140 1121 Gilbert Ct, Iowa City, 52240 Emma Goldman Clinic 227 N. Dubuque St, Iowa City, IA 52245 319-337-2111or 1-800-848-7684.

Faith United Church of Christ An open and affirming congregation.

1609 Deforest Street, Iowa City, 52240 Sunday Worship 9:30 AM 319-338-5238 bob.faithucc@g.com, faithucciowacity.org GLBTAU-U of lA Student support system and resource center, info, activism, events, and other community involvements.

203 IMU, University of IA, Iowa City, IA 52242-1317 - 319-335-3251 (voice mail) glbtau@uiowa.edu Hope United Methodist Church Worship Service at 9:30am. 2929 E. Court St., Iowa City, IA - Contact Rev. Sherry Lohman.

319-338-9865 Human Rights Commission (City of Iowa City Human Rights Commission) 319-356-5022; 391-356-5015; 319-356-5014 Fax 319-887-6213 humanrights@iowa-city.org ICARE (Iowa Center for AIDS Resources & Education) Practical & emotional support, youth programs, information, referrals and support groups. 319-338-2135 3211 E 1st Iowa City, IA 52240-4703 Iowa City Free Medical Clinic - 319-337-4459 Free & strictly confidential HIV Testing. 2440 Towncrest Dr Iowa City, Call for appointment Iowa City NOW PO Box 2944, Iowa City, IA 52244 Iowa Women’s Music Festival P.O. Box 3411, Iowa City, IA 52244 319-335-1486 Men Supporting Men 319-356-6038, Ext 2 HIV prevention program. Discussion Groups, Educational Series, Safer Sex Workshops, Book Club. Andy Weigel, email: aweigel@ co.johnson.ia.us New Song Episcopal Church 912 20th Ave, Coralville, IA. Sunday services at 10am.

Jennifer Masada, Jane Stewart, and John Greve. 319-351-3577 Pride Committee WRAC, 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242 Bridget Malone - 319-338-0512 Charles Howes - 319-335-1486 Romantix Iowa City - 319-351-9444 (Pleasure Palace I) 315 Kirkwood Ave, Iowa City, IA 52240-4722 - romantixonline.com

Studio 13 13 S. Linn St. (in the Alley) Iowa City, IA Open 7pm ‘til 2am, daily 319-338-7145 U of I Lesbian, Gay & Bisexual Staff & Faculty Association, c/o WRAC, 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242, 319-335-1486 Unitarian Universalist Society of Iowa City Inclusive & free religious community nurturing intellectual & spiritual growth & fostering ethical & social responsibility. uusic.org 10 S. Gilbert, Iowa City, IA Sunday services: 9:30am & 11:15am. 319-337-3443 United Action for Youth (UAY) A GLBTQA youth group providing support and counseling for teenagers and young adults processing sexual identity issues. Meets Mondays 7-9pm at UAY 410 Iowa Ave. Iowa City, IA. 319-338-7518 or Teen Line, 319-338-0559.

The Ursine Group Bear Events in the Midwest. PO Box 1143, Iowa City, IA 52244-1143 - 319-338-5810 Women’s Resource Action Center (WRAC) Leads & collaborates on projects that serve U of l and the greater community, offers social & support services, including LGBT Coming Out Group.

University of Iowa, 130 N Madison, Iowa City, IA 52242 - 319-335-1486

MARSHALLTOWN, IOWA

Adult Odyssey (Adult Video Store) 907 Iowa Ave E - 641-752-6550 Domestic Violence Alternatives/ Sexual Assault Center, Inc., 132 W Main St. 24 hour Crisis Line: 641-753-3513 or (instate only) 800-779-3512

MASON CITY, IOWA

Cerro Gordo County Dept. of Public Health 22 N. Georgia Ave, Ste 300 Mason City, IA 50401. Free confidential AIDS testing. 641421-9321 PFLAG North Iowa Chapter 641-583-2848, pflagmcni@yahoo.com, Carlos O’Kelly’s Mexican Cafe @ 7 p.m. Wed.

MOUNT VERNON, IOWA

Alliance Cornell College 810 Commons Cir # 2035 - alliance@cornellcollege.edu - orgs.cornellcollege.edu/alliance/

PELLA, IOWA

Common Ground (Central College) Support group for GLBT students and allies.

Contact: Brandyn Woodard, Director of Intercultural Life woodardb@central.edu 641-628-5134

QUAD CITIES, IOWA

AIDS Project Quad Cities Info, education & support. Davenport, IA 52804, www.apqc4life.org 319-762-LIFE Black Hawk College Unity Alliance Serving GLBT community at Black Hawk College. 6600 34th Ave, Rock Island, IL 309-716-0542.

Connections Nightclub 563-322-1121 822 W 2nd St, Davenport, IA 52802 DeLaCerda House 309-786-7386 Provides housing & supportive services, advocacy and referrals for people living with HIV/ AIDS. P.O. Box 4551, Rock Island, Il. 61201 Good Samaritan Free Clinic 309-797-4688 Provides free primary medical care to patients age 16-64 who are working but have no medical insurance. gsfc@mchsi.com 602 35th Ave, Moline, IL GoodSamaritanFreeClinic.org The Hole-In-The-Wall 309-289-2375 A Private Membership Men’s Club, Located 3 miles east of Galesburg, IL. just north of I-74 at Exit 51. HoleInTheWallMensClub.org Holy Spirit Catholic Faith Community Meets one weekend a month for mass.

Please visit our web site: www.transformationalcatholicchurch.com for more information or call: 309-278-7909.

Lucky Shamrock 313 20th St, Rock Island, IL - 309-788-7426 An Irish Pub open to all types.

Mary’s On 2nd 563-884-8014 832 W. 2nd St. Davenport, IA MCC Quad Cities - Svcs Sun 11am, Bible study Wed 7pm 563-324-8281, 3019 N Harrison, Davenport, IA 52803 Men’s Coming Out/Being Out Group Meets 2nd & 4th Thursdays, 7pm. QCAD. outforgood@gmail.com 309-786-2580 PFLAG Quad Cities 563-285-4173 Eldridge United Methodist Church 604 S.2nd St., Eldridge 1st Monday, 6:30 pm Prism (Augustana College) 309-794-7406 Augustana Gay-Straight Alliance, Augustana Library - 639 38th St, Rock Island, IL, Contact Tom Bengston

Quad Citians Affirming Diversity (QCAD) Social & support groups for lesbian, bi, and gay teens, adults, friends & families; newsletter.

309-786-2580 - Community Center located at 1608 2nd Ave, Rock Island.

Quad Cities Pride Chorus (Call Don at 563324-0215) At the MCC Church in D’port, 7pm Wed. qcswede64@aol.com Rainbow Gifts www.rainbowgifts.net - 309-764-0559 T.R. Video Adult books & video, 3727 Hickory Grove Rd, Davenport, IA. 563-386-7914 Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Quad Cities, Rev Jay Wolin, Sunday Service 11am - 563-359-0816 3707 Eastern Avenue, Davenport, IA 52807 Venus News (Adult) 902 W 3rd St, Davenport, IA. 563-322-7576

RED OAK, IOWA

First Congregational United Church of Christ (open and affirming) - 712-623-2794 608 E Reed St, Red Oak, IA 51566 Rev. Elizabeth Dilley, Pastor uccwebsites.net/firstcongredoakia.html firstconguccredoak@yahoo.com

SHENANDOAH, IOWA

PFLAG Shenandoah 1002 South Elm Street - 712-246-2824

SIOUX CITY, IOWA

Am. Business & Professional Guild.

Gay Businessmen. Meets last Sat. of the month; ABPG, P. O. BOX 72, Sioux City, 51102 - abpguild@yahoo.com Grace United Methodist Church 1735 Morningside Avenue - 712-276-3452.

Jones Street Station (Bar) 712-258-6922 412 Jones St., Nightly 6:00pm to 2:00am.

Mayflower Congregational Church 1407 West 18th St - 712-258-8278.

Morningside College Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual Alliance Contact Professor Gail Dooley, Advisor Morningside College GSA. 1501 Morningside Ave, Sioux City, IA 51106-1717 dooley@morningside.edu - 712-274-5208 PFLAG Siouxland PO Box 1311, Sioux City, IA 51102 siouxlandPFLAG@aol.com Romantix Sioux City 712-277-8566 511 Pearl St, Sioux City, IA 51101-1217 St. Thomas Episcopal Church Service Sun 10:30am 406 12th St, Waverly, IA Rev Mary Christopher - 712-258-0141 Western Iowa Tech. GSA widemal@juno.com for info.

SIOUX FALLS, SOUTH DAKOTA

Toppers, 1213 N Cliff Ave, Sioux Falls, SD 57103, (605) 339-7686, Su-Tu 7:00pm - Close : We-Sa 3:00pm - 2:00am, sdtoppers.com Center for Equality, PO box 2009 Sioux Falls, SD 57101-2009, 605-331-1153, centersforequalitysd.org

WAVERLY, IOWA

Cedar Valley Episcopal Campus Ministry.

717 W. Bremer, (St. Andrew’s Episcopal) episcoplcampus.org - 319-415-5747 Gay, Lesbian Bisexual Student Alliance Wartburg College, Waverly, IA 50677. Contact Susan Vallem - 319-352-8250 St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church 717 W. Bremer. We welcome all to worship with us on Sunday at 10:30am. Bible discussion Wed. 6:45pm 319-352-1489 Rev. Maureen Doherty, Pastor

NEBRASKA (CONTENT IN PROGRESS) HASTINGS, NEBRASKA

PFLAG Hastings - pat@datacc.net

LINCOLN, NEBRASKA

Club Q Lincoln - 402-475-2269 226 South 9th St, Lincoln, NE 68508 Indigo Bridge Books The Creamery Building, 701 P St, Ste 102, Lincoln, NE 68508 - 402-477 7770 “Indigo Bridge Books strives to provide a solid, relevant Gender Studies section with a focus on LGBT titles. indigobridgebooks.com Nebraska AIDS Project (Lincoln Office) 1921 South 17th Street, Lincoln, NE 68502 (402) 476-7000 - nap.org OUTLinc - outlinc.org Bringing Lincoln’s LGBT Community Together Panic - 402-435-8764 200 S 18th St, Lincoln, NE 68508

ACCESSline Page 29 PFLAG Cornhusker Chapter PO Box 82034, Lincoln, NE 68501 Meetings 4th Tuesday, Unitarian Church of Lincoln, 6300 A St, 7-9pm pflagcornhusker.org PFLAG Helpline: 402-434-9880 - Confidential Support & Information - We’re Here For You !

Planned Parenthood of the Heartland Sexual and Reproductive Health Care, Transgender Care - (402) 441-3302 2246 O St, Lincoln, NE 68510 The Rainbow Clinic in the UNL Psychological Consultation Center “…a specialty outreach service to the GLBTQ community. Psychological services, including individual, couples & family therapy, are provided within the UNL Psychological Consultation Center by regular PCC staff…open year round; day & evening appointments available. $10 for intake & $25 for therapy sessions. Application can be made for reduced fees based on federal poverty guidelines.

325 Burnett Hall, Lincoln, NE 68588 402-472-2351 unl.edu/psypage/pcc/ Star City Pride starcitypride.org - info@starcitypride.org The Unitarian Church of Lincoln 6300 A Street, Lincoln, NE 68510-5097 (402) 483-2213 - unitarianlincoln.org Sunday from 10am to 11am

OMAHA, NEBRASKA

AIDS Interfaith Network 100 N. 62nd, Omaha, NE Call Br. Wm. Woeger, 402-558-3100 Citizens For Equal Protection-402-398-3027 1105 Howard St, Suite #2, Omaha, NE 68102. cfep-ne.org - info@cfep-ne.org DC’s Saloon - (western/levi/leather) The Midwest’s hottest GLBT Country & Dance Bar! 610 S 14th St, Omaha, NE, Open everyday 2pm-1am Front Runners/Front Walkers Walking/jogging club. P.O. Box 4583, Omaha, NE 68104, 402-804-8720, frontrunners.org GLBT Rainbow Outreach Omaha Serving GLBT community in eastern Nebraska and western Iowa. Also office for Imperial court of Nebraska. 1719 Leavenworth St, Omaha, NE, rocc.org - 402-341-0330 Greater Omaha GLBT Network - goglbt.org “…to advance growth & equality for its members, businesses & allies by providing educational, networking & community-building opportunities. Meetings 1st Thursday every month locations at a traveling location to see the community and be seen. For more info or to be included on the e-newsletter list, please email us at info@goglbt.org.

Heartland Gay Rodeo Association (HGRA) (Midwest Division of the International Gay Rodeo Association) PO Box 3354, Omaha, NE 68103, hgra.net - 402-203-4680, Serves Iowa and Nebraska Heartland Pride ”…to develop a high impact and relevant cultural festival & events annually that promotes equality & unity for the LGBTQ & Allies Communities of Western Iowa and Greater Nebraska. heartlandpride.org Imperial Court of Nebraska 402-556-9907 P.O. Box 3772, Omaha, NE 68103 Inclusive Life - inclusivelife.org “Religious and Non religious care, services and ceremonies for all!”, 105 S. 49 Street, Suite E, Omaha, NE 68132, (402) 575-7006, The Max 1417 Jackson at 15th, Omaha, NE 68102 6 bars in 1 - 402-346-4110 McLovin 1010 South 10 Street, Omaha, NE, 68108 info@mclovinstore.com, MclovingStore.com 402-915-4002, A store for men.

MCC Omaha 819 South 22nd, Omaha, NE 68103, Sun 9:30AM & 11:15 AM. Wednesday “ReCharge” Worship, Wed 7pm - 402-345-2563 PFLAG Omaha Mead Hall, First United Methodist Church, 7020 Cass St. (Omaha), 2nd Thursday, 7, 6:30 Social, 402-291-6781 River City Gender Alliance Peer support, friendship, and understanding for crossdressers, transgenderists, and transsexuals. PO Box 4083 Omaha, NE 68104, 402-291-6781, info@rcga.us - rcga.us River City Mixed Chorus Gay/lesbian chorus, PO Box 3267, Omaha, NE 68103, Call Stan Brown, 402-341-7464 Tri-ess Chapter, Kappa Phi Lambda Chapter, Omaha, NE 68107, Transgendered organization supporting crossdressers, their families, and friends. tri-ess.org, 402-960-9696, Judy marlenemarschel@yahoo.com Youth Support Group for GLBT Youth 13-21, meets twice monthly. Omaha, NE - 402-291- 6781

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Section 3: Community

AUGUST 2013

AUGUST 2013 SScontinued from page 26

BLUMENFELD making English as the “official” language of Iowa. He then ran for and was elected to the U.S. House of Representative in 2002 sitting on the Agricultural and Judiciary Committees, Constitution Subcommittee and Immigration Subcommittee. He also chairs the powerful House of Representatives Conservative Opportunity Society caucus. While in public office, he has consistently taken stands championed by the political Right opposing affirmative action for women and minoritized people, marriage equality for same-sex couples, women’s reproductive rights, and gun control, among others.

Over the past few years, the so-called “Birther Movement,” of which Rep. King is a prominent member, has tirelessly worked to define President Barack Obama as “other” by attempting to prevent our President the right of self-definition– an apparent contradiction within a political party that emphasizes rugged individualism, freedom, and liberty over one’s life. In August 2012, King made the absurdist accusation during a tele-townhall meeting that though his staff had found Barack Obama’s birth announcement in two separate Hawaiian newspapers, “That doesn’t mean there aren’t some other explanations on how they might’ve announced that by telegram

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LESLIE JORDAN 2006 Emmy Award for Outstanding Guest Actor, for his portrayal of ‘Beverley Leslie’ in the series “Will and Grace.” He is also known for his work in Del Shores’ “Sordid Lives” and “Southern Baptist Sissies.” Leslie Jordan will be performing “Show Horse” Sunday, September 1st at The Garden in Des Moines, Iowa.

I know you are on tour right now.

I do these sort of mini tours, I’m doing Provincetown and we are going to up to Ogunquit, Maine which is a little gay Mecca next to Kennebunkport, where the Bush’s live—which I think is hilarious! Then Fort Worth and then Indianapolis, but I am so excited to come to a state that surprised all of us!

Is this going to be your first trip to Iowa?

It will be my first trip to Iowa, and every Iowan I’ve talked to has said the same thing, “If you tell us we can’t do something—we’re going to do it.”

We are very excited for you to come to Des Moines. September 1st you are going to be at the Garden performing “Show Pony.” Could you give me a little tidbit, something for your fans to look forward to?

I started doing one person shows and around 1992 was my first one. Because a casting director said, “You know what? Leslie Jordan is going to have a long and strong career as the funny guy that comes in with the zingers. But he will probably never have his own show.” Well, I thought, I am more than the funny guy who comes in with the zingers—so I started writing one person shows. For about 20-30 years I have waited for Hollywood to come knocking. After I won the Emmy in 2006, I thought, “Now I’m set.” Nothing. Now my manager really gets mad at me when I say “Nothing”, because I

Section 3: Community from Kenya.” http://thinkprogress.org/ politics/2012/08/01/619371/steveking-birther/.

King also asserted while Obama was running for the presidential nomination in 2008: “When you think about the optics of a Barack Obama potentially getting elected President of the United States… [w]hat does it look like to the world of Islam? I will tell you that, if he is elected president, then the radical Islamists, the al-Qaida, the radical Islamists and their supporters, will be dancing in the streets in greater numbers than they did on September 11 because they will declare victory in this War on Terror.” “Local News: King announced bid for fourth term (03/08/08)”. Spencer Daily Reporter.

March 8, 2008. http://www.spencerdailyreporter.com/story/1316727.html While the late night comedians are having a field day with the Anthony Weiner scandal and the political pundits’ calls for him to leave the New York City mayoral campaign are growing increasingly louder citing the embarrassment he is causing the residents of that great city due to his innumerable sexual transgressions and extreme lack of judgment, I would add another politician, Steve King, a sitting Congressperson, to vacate his office before he commits further and possibly irreversible damage to his constituents, his home state, his Party, his country, and, ultimately, to himself. never had to audition for anything since then.

It’s been all offers, which for an actor is a wonderful thing, when they just call up and offer you things. But, I called my manager finally, and said, “I can’t eat this Emmy, what are we going to do?”

I have a dear friend named Dave Morgan, who has this huge marketing firm and he does Warner Brothers, he does Harry Potter openings, he’s a special event planner. I jokingly said to him, “Make me a special event! I’m so popular with the gay community.” That was 2006 and now I am up to about 45 venues a year, and every year I try out a new show.

This one I’m concentrating on a show pony because I sometimes feel like an aging show pony. They’ll just trot me out and half the time I never even know where I am—”Here we go again!” But Show Pony is about all the, sort of humiliating—but not really humiliating, jobs I have had to do since I won that Emmy.

I’ll give you an example. They called and I don’t know much about the internet, but apparently Will Farrell has a very popular comedy site called, “Funny or Die”. They called and they asked me if I would do a skit, and play RuPaul. I thought, “Well, are they going to put me in black?” Anyway, to make a long story short, I waited and waited for wardrobe to call because I thought, “I don’t have a dress!” When wardrobe finally called, they said, “We’ll make it simple, you bring a blue suit and we’ve got a red tie.” I said, “For Ru Paul?” They said, “Oh no honey, you’re playing Ron Paul.” I looked him up and thought, “We could be identical twins!”

It was the worst day of my life. So anyway, it’s just stories.

My deal is that I am more of a story teller then a joke teller, I have never been really good at stand-up and I’m a story teller and I’m a big talker. You never quite know what you’re going to get. I am sort of like a musi-

TTLESLIE JORDAN cont’d page 34

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BOYSTOWN What gayborhoods do you see? From left to right is; (West) Hollywood sign, then Golden Gate Bridge (SF Castro), the middle is Chicago with Sears Tower and Halsted, and then ends with Christopher street and Statue of Liberty in NYC. Talk to me about your collaboration and what influences you had on the song “Boystown”.

Mark: I carried the theme and idea of “Boystown” in my head for a couple of years.

Finally last year, I flew out to L.A. to collaborate with Danny. I sang and played for him my idea of the chorus which was loosely based off of “Downtown” by Petula Clark. When Danny heard it, he instantly loved it too and took the ball and ran with it.

If you hear the finished song now, I am not sure the listener will hear much of the elements of “Downtown,” but that is for them to decide. The song has definitely taken on an entity all its own.

Danny MacArthur: Well, all the really great Leo Bayer Sager songs of the 60s and 70s.

We wanted it to be a torch song and a dance anthem at the same time, like Petula Clark meets Jimmy Somerville from Bronski Beat.

What experience do you want people to have when listening to “Boystown”?

Danny MacArthur: We want them to relate because if your Gay, Lesbian ,Bisexual, or transgender you’re going to feel an immense rush of acceptance and love, and fantasy the first time you make it “Oz” (especially if that yellow brick road was a bumpy one)!

Mark: As with anything I write with Danny, I wanted the song to be dance/pop/ electronic. I wanted it to be the type of song you could jog, workout and dance too. We wanted the song to pay homage to life and love in Boystown.

By the way, this is not just about one specific Boystown in Chicago and West Hollywood, but a collaboration of personal experiences from all of them. In it, the lyrics are “Here we are on Castro and Halsted. Here we are on University, Santa Monica Boulevard.”

Danny also threw in lyrics with “Christopher Street” and a street called “Sheinkin” in Tel Aviv. You can say it has the whole fabulous gay kitchen sink.

What’s next for both of you? Will we be hearing more from this collaboration?

Danny MacArthur: The success of the song has been so wonderful and grounding that bringing another experience or adventure that we may have all shared to glorious Technicolor Fabulousness is likely in the forecast!

Mark: Any time I get a song idea, I want

Mark Ortega and Danny MacArthur.

Courtesy of Mark Ortega. to collaborate with Danny. In fact, all the songs on my EP “Love Chronicles” are older songs written and produced with Danny. I already have another idea for a song. It’s just a matter of finding the time, resources, and to get back out to L.A. and write it with Danny. I would love to write a whole concept album with Danny but I would have to quit my day job and move back to L.A. which I am not willing to do at the moment.

How have you given back to the LGBT community?

Mark: I hope that I have given some sort of inspiration back to the community. By writing songs with my LGBT community in mind, it is my hope that people will connect with the messages I hope convey through my music.

Danny MacArthur: With the one thing the Universe has given to us— with our looks of course! We perform at benefits, and I think, more than anything, helping and volunteering with mentor programs in our LGBT community has been a dazzling and blessed experience.

Mark, you have done several fundraisers for local organizations, which has impacted you the most?

Mark: They all have impacted me equally.

The Trevor Project is a wonderful organization and I have actually had two shows with proceeds going to them and am working on a third this year. TPAN (Test Positive Aware Network) in Chicago offers services for people living with HIV. Team 2 End AIDS, Howard Brown Health and AIDS Foundation Chicago are also organizations that I wanted to generate more awareness.

Where can people pick up your new single?

Mark: iTunes, Google Play, Amazon MP3, Jango, Spotify and emusic just to name a few.

If you Google search “Mark Ortega Boystown,” lots of interesting stuff comes up.

For more information go to MarkOrtegaEntertainment.com

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Section 3: Community

I.C. Kings: Long, Hot Summer

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KINSEY SICKS

L/r: Trampolina, Rachel, Winnie, and Trixie. Courtesy of the Kinsey Sicks.

The I.C. Kings performed “Long, Hot Summer!” at Studio 16, Thursday, July 25th. I.C. Kings pictured from L/R Franky D. Lover, Joey D Drag King, Max E Mum, and Miss Kitty with NKOB Jayden Knight for a special performance. Catch the I.C. Kings for their next performance “Study A Broad” at Studio 16, Thursday, August 29th.

Photos courtesy of Audra M. King.

As proud longtime supporters of the LGBT community, champions of films ranging from ‘Gods and Monsters’ to ‘The Perks of Being a Wallflower’ and a company that is proud to have recognized same-sex unions and domestic partnerships within its employee benefits policies for many years, we obviously do not agree with the personal views of Orson Scott Card and those of the National Organization for Marriage. However, they are completely irrelevant to a discussion of ‘Ender’s Game.’ ~Lionsgate Entertainment release in regards to anti-gay views of Orson Scott Card.

laugh until their faces hurt the Kinsey Sicks challenge audience members to think about a range of cultural and political trends deeply and critically.

The Kinsey Sicks are performing August 18th at CSPS in Cedar Rapids, Iowa.

What can Kinsey Sick fans look forward to with their new musical, “America’s Next Top Bachelor Housewife Celebrity Hoarder Makeover Star Gone Wild”?

Winnie: Exquisite a cappella harmonies, biting satire, beautiful outfits, inspired gags – Trixie: Innuendo and exuendo.

Trampolina: Big hair.

Rachel: No refunds.

Does Trampolina have any advice for the girls in surviving the jungles of the Midwest?

Trampolina: Hey, that’s a trick question.

There are no jungles in the Midwest. Just deserts and Arab countries. Ha! Would Winnie be willing to share one of her recipes at a potluck?

Winnie: Of course. But the trick is to leave out one unassuming yet crucial ingredient.

With same-sex marriage being legal in Iowa, does Trixie have plans of expanding her wedding chapels and drive-thru divorce courts?

Trixie: I’ve recently crafted a new partnership with Chik-Fil-A, which will now be the drive-through site for same-sex divorces nationwide. And every divorce comes with a

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AUGUST 2013 side of freedom fries.

Will Rachel be promoting any of her causes while in Iowa?

Rachel: Yes, thank you for asking. I will be lobbying for greater social, educational and romantic opportunities for large grazing animals.

What moments stand out in The Kinsey Sicks twenty years of phenomenal performance?

Trampolina: What? We had a phenomenal performance? Was I there?

Trixie: I’ve always enjoyed the picket lines outside the show.

Rachel: I love it when the fans put out.

Winnie: We enjoy every moment singing for our wonderful audiences.

Rachel: Did I mention I love it when the fans put out?

The Kinsey Sicks received standing ovations as contestants for Season 3 of “America’s Got Talent,” but were cut before the Season aired. What reactions did The Kinsey Sicks have to this?

Winnie: We thought, “Wow, the producers are in fact much smarter than the audience!“ In truth, we did always wonder why they thought we’d be a good match for the show. We have talent up the wazoo, but our material tends to be a little spicy for prime time.

The Kinsey Sicks have found a combination of activism and theater that make people laugh and think, what values are significant to The Kinsey Sicks?

Rachel: You want a serious answer, don’t you? We believe in questioning authority, in love being more important than law, in everyone seeing their own value. We are against hate, violence, shaming and dieting.

What does the future hold for The Kinsey Sicks?

Trampolina: I hear we have a show coming up in Cedar Rapids. I’m right, aren’t I? For more information on the Kinsey Sicks go to KinseySicks.com and to purchase tickets for their August 18th show go to LegionArts.org.

UCC clergy confronting gays and lesbians within the church for not being married or celibate. Now, I am afraid, there will be an ever-increasing expectation of marriage for gays and lesbians, and, more importantly, an increasing moral condemnation, especially within the church, for those who make other choices. I fear that the great strides we have made within the church,

and the insights of queer theology, will be lost. We will replace one form of repression with another. Perhaps in ten years you may not even be able to buy queer theology from Pilgrim Press. That is not a future that we want. We did not come this far for that outcome. We must continue to make our voices heard for acceptance, compassion, and a theologically examined life. That is the way for Christians to be true disciples of Jesus, himself a single man of ambiguous sexuality.

The article by Rev. Jonathan Page contributes to a discussion that is an important one. Historically, the morality message from the church to gay children of God has been, “Whether you are in a committed, monogamous same-sex relationship for a life time or utterly promiscuous with as many of the same sex as you can handle until you drop dead from exhaustion or worse, it’s a moral equivalent. You go to hell in either case.”

That untenable “moral” lesson was indefensible. Part of the churches’ reluctance to accept gay marriage has been the

unspoken question about what comes next.

If gay marriage is to be accepted, are gay people to be plugged into the anachronistic model of marriage v. celibacy that the church has used to define sexual morality and clung to tenaciously; a morality construct that straight people have been ignoring for centuries?

It is my hope that the discussion will lead to greater clarity about moral behavior in the arena of sexuality that will ultimately benefit gay couples and straight couples alike.

PAGE

Finding and Defining Sexual Morality by Jonathan Wilson

Section 3: Community

AUGUST 2013 SScontinued from page 4

SEXUAL HEALTH education and counseling to help patients make safe, healthy decisions.

What difficulties do small centers face?

Our smaller health centers have fewer staff members, so while they wear many different hats, they all work really well together. We are a great team and do whatever we can to make sure every patient receives the health services they need, when they need it.

How does the HIV/STI testing process work?

We offer rapid HIV testing at all of our health centers. That means patients can come in for an HIV test through a simple finger prick, and learn their status within minutes—so they receive testing and their results in one visit. We also provide counseling and treatment referral services if necessary.

We also offer confidential STI testing and treatment for chlamydia, gonorrhea, genital warts, syphilis, herpes and more, at all of our health centers. STI testing

is relatively pain free. Many screenings are done using a urine sample, and some require a genital exam. If there is an infection we will provide treatment and explain how your partner can also be treated.

Every patient receives comprehensive sex education to help them make safe, healthy decisions. We discuss a variety of prevention methods to help each individual decide what is best for their situation.

What are the payment options for HIV/STI testing?

Some STI/HIV screenings may be covered by your insurance. If patients don’t have insurance we accept Medicaid or see if a person can qualify for a state-funded program to lower the price. We try to make all of our services as affordable as possible, and we never turn anyone away for inability to pay.

Planned Parenthood has 20 health centers across Iowa and two health centers in Nebraska.Locations are listed here: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/ health-center/findCenter.asp.

For more information on Midwestern AIDS Project go to: Facebook.com/MWAIDSProject.

That means patients can come in for an HIV test through a simple finger prick...

I don’t like to badmouth people. But I’m the head of a monarchy that began in the ninth century, and I’m apparently more modern than Chris Christie. Look, I know he has to appeal to the crazy right wingers in his party. But the fact is, he’s not as forward-thinking as an eighty-seven-year-old lady who wears a crown on her head. It’s pathetic. ~Queen Elizabeth II of Britain in regards to Gov. Christie of New Jersey.

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BROWN as well. I’m nothing if not honest and open about who I am, and what I stand for. With this honesty, respect, and truthfulness, I look to earn the opportunity to be a servant leader on City Council.

If elected you would be the youngest member of the City Council, how do you feel your youth will contribute to the Council?

Being 20+ years junior to any current member of council, I will bring renewed passion to serve and a fresh perspective to Cedar Rapids. I look forward to the opportunity to learn from the experience and knowledge of fellow Council Members.

What issues do you feel are important to

ACCESSline Page 33 citizens of Cedar Rapids?

In conversations with residents and business owners here, not taking away from Flood Recovery efforts, most of the topics revolve around Roads, Community Development, and Accessibility. I will work to increase our Road Maintenance Budget, develop community programs (Housing and Business Development) that benefit all residents in Cedar Rapids, and actively be engaged with our citizens in the process to make Cedar Rapids our home for now and in the future.

Where can people go for more information?

People visit (and donate at!) www.

BrownForCR.org or people can visit the campaign Facebook Page at www.facebook. com/AnthonyBrownCR.

LGBTQ Patient & Family

Education and Support Groups Come join the UI LGBTQ Clinic providers and other health professionals to learn about various health and wellness topics and have the opportunity to meet new people!

This Thursday, July 18th at 5:30pm in 2520B UCC, come for the next installment of the LGBTQ Patient & Family Education & Support Groups.

August 1 - Medical Care for the Gender Non-Conforming Child, Katie Larsen Ode, MD August 8 - Safer Sex for Gay and Bisexual Men, Cody Shafer, Health Educator: HIV and Hepatitis Programs August 15 - Lesbian and Bisexual Women PMS, Susan Johnson, PhD August 22 - Gay and Bisexual Men and Fatherhood, Ellen Lewin, PhD August 29 - Creating a Supportive Environment for the Gender Non-Conforming Child, Peter Daniolos, MD

Hours: Every Thursday evening 5:30-7:00pm Location: University Capitol Center (UCC), Located in Old Capitol Mall 201 S. Clinton St., Iowa City IA RM 2520B Contact: meagan-schorr@uiowa.edu or www.uihealthcare.org/lgbt/

ACCESSline Page 34

Section 3: Community

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LESLIE JORDAN cian in that I decide a set list, and so since I haven’t been to Des Moines before, I might toss a little something in about Will and Grace.

And maybe a little something about a cult show called “Sordid Lives.” Who knows what you’re going to get and I have never had a complaint yet. A good time will be had by all!

Speaking of your various roles, do you have one that stands out that might have been your favorite?

I did this cult movie that I mentioned called “Sordid Lives.” It was a film with Olivia Newton John and had a stellar cast. My best friend wrote it and we shot it on a shoestring.

I played a man in a mental hospital who thought he was Tammy Wynette, so I was in this sort of Tammy Wynette drag. That was a favorite, because it went from being a play to a movie, and we did a series of it for Logo for a while, the series “Sordid Lives.” It’s a black comedy about white trash.

But I guess the big role would have to be Will and Grace, which I received a big award—an Emmy for that. I’m really proud to have been a part of it, because when it’s all said and done, and history is written, I think people are going to see Will and Grace was the turning point—it really was. I think people’s minds began to change. I’ve always thought that the best way to put a face on homophobia, I mean the best way to combat homophobia, was to put a face on it. And humor. Two ways to combat homophobia, to put a face on it and humor. People welcomed those characters into their homes. And we laughed, and we loved, and there was progress made.

I’m really proud to have been a part of that.

Unless the Oscar comes along, I think that’s the one I will be remembered for.

Have you seen a lot of progress for LGBT equality in your lifetime?

I have seen such progress. Yesterday, I had to get on a train, you fly out to Boston and then you get out to the end of the Cape where you can either drive (which is three hours) or take a ferry (which I get sea sick) or you can get on this train at a place called Cape Air—I call it “Cape Fear!” There was this little kid, I say kid but he was probably 16, he was Indian (like from India, not like American Indian) and just clapping his little hands as we took off. And I said to him, “Do you live in P-town”? He said, “No, I am going to an all gay camp, and I am so excited.” I said, “You’re doing what?” He said, “They have a gay camp in Provincetown called Light Bulb.

They select seven kids and I was one of the kids selected. My parents had me come, and” la, la, la. I just thought, “My God, the progress!”

When I was 16, I was so afraid that someone was going to find out. I was in a religion that that certainly didn’t embrace me—the deep southern Baptist. I’ve been baptized 14 times, because as a little kid you think, “Maybe it just didn’t take.” You’re scared of that lake of fire they talk about. My poor mother didn’t care. She said, “You were already saved.” And I said, “I know, but I would like to get baptized again.”

Even in my Hollywood career, I got to Hollywood in 1982, when it was very “wink wink”. There were no gay characters on TV at all. The only one I can even remotely remember is from “Are You Being Served”,

Leslie Jordan which was an English sitcom. And it had this very “wink wink” character, they never said he was gay but it was a lot of innuendos.

You would get sent on auditions, and I always had gay managers, I always had gay agents. And they would tell me, “Leslie keep your feet on the ground. Keep your hands at your sides. Put your voice in your lower register. You know, we cannot have any hint of gayness for this one.” For a long time, we were called, nebbish. We would want a “mamma’s boy”. That went on for years and years. I also recently, a few years ago, a friend of mine took me to an all gay church in Dallas, Texas. It was called, The Cathedral of Hope. I walked in the door, and I burst into tears. I could not quit crying. And my friend said, “Girl, get a grip, what’s wrong with you?” I said, “You don’t understand from where I came. The idea of being in a house of worship, surrounded by my tribe, is so overwhelming, I’m sorry.”

People think we’ve come far enough, some not enough. Honey, I see kids walking down the street in West Hollywood holding hands, and I burst into tears. My generation, you have to go see Milk, I think it really

captured it, the movie about Harvey Milk— that was my generation.

There was a wonderful scene where they’re trying to get the young kids to get more political. And I was that one little guy that rolled his eyes, like “We’re going to the bar here. Who cares about anything, we’re going to the bar. We’re going to get F*’d up and have sex.” I think it’s interesting. Here I am, 58 years old, closer to my authentic self then I have ever been, happier than I’ve ever been, perfectly content with who I am, and what I am—to come from the little kid in the church pew, just hating himself. It’s been a journey, quite a journey. Most of my shows are about that. They’re all funny, but they all have a little bit more. I got sober, which really helped, and the LA crime rate went down for sure 16 years ago! When I got sober, I realized, and this is a big shame for me, I never voted. 42 years old, never registered to vote. I mean, who had time?

You know what I mean? I didn’t get up early enough to vote! My generation, we marched

ALPHAs

ALPHAs have a meet and greet every third (3rd) Friday of the month, held at Icon’s Martini Bar located at 124 18th Street in Rock Island. It’s a gathering for members of the LGBT community, supporters and friends to socialize, celebrate and get to know one another over martinis. Events are posted on Facebook at alphaselitecrew@ facebook.com or for more information contact alphaselite@yahoo.com.

AUGUST 2013 in the streets, come out of the closet and into the street. That’s all well and good to bring a little attention to your cause. But the change has to come from within. That’s my new platform. To get kids, especially if they are gay kids, they’ve got to vote, and their votes count. We have a president on our side now, but we also have those Republicans—oh my god, they’re tireless, aren’t they!

You did something I’m extremely jealous of—you got to have a role on Star Trek.

Star Trek, it was the worst day of my life!

I played the Ferengi, and it was a 3 o’clock in the morning makeup call. And I hold the distinction of being in Ferengi makeup for the longest of any human on the planet. They put me in makeup, put straws in my nose—it was five hours! It included the contact lenses, fake teeth…it was the most miserable I have ever been in my life.

All of a sudden, it is midnight the next day, and we are still going. I went in, what is called Golden Time, which means you are getting every hour of full day’s salary. So, if you’re making $4,000 for the week and I was only working one day, and it was a weekly salary—I was getting $4,000 an hour. My paycheck for one day was $12,000 and my manager, Connie, said “They love you. The only problem they’re having Leslie is that southern accent.” They hadn’t auditioned me. And I walked onto the Enterprise, and delivered my first line. It was hysteria. The director said, “Could we bring that Ferengi a little north of the Mason-Dixon Line?” I tried to drop my southern, and somehow I fell into cockney me. And the director said, “You sound like a lack-a-doodle on crack! You have to do something about it.” They brought in a linguist, and taught me ‘Mr. Jordan’ the word feather does not have four syllables.

Once we got it all settled, my manager called and the linguist worked with me, and we got it shot. They really loved the character, and they wanted to bring me back—I refused.

My manager was so mad at me for turning them down. He said, “Leslie, you are now with Woopie.” I said, “I’ll call if my scenes are with Jesus Christ, but I am not going to wear that makeup for 22 hours again!” It was awful, at one point I fell asleep and I dreamt that I was drowning. I woke up and I had ripped half my face off, my plastic face.

They were screaming at me, because they had to stop and redo it. I started at 3 in the morning, I went on the set at 8 in the morning, by midnight that night, we were still going and I think they released me around 1 that morning. It was the worst day in my life. So darling, pity me, pity me!

Leslie Jordan will have books and videos after his performance. He will come out afterwards and greet, and sell books, and meet people. For more information and tickets go to GRDN.com.

AUGUST 2013

Section 3: Community

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