Adoption newsletter issue 3 (2)

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Adoption Newsletter Is it Time for Therapy? It is very important for adoptive families to feel supported as they address their children’s needs and respond to changes in their family system. However, quite often the adoptive parents need to be proactive in seeking appropriate mental health services. According to the article, Issues Facing Adoptive Mothers of Children with Special Needs, written by Heather Forbes and Sophia F. Dziegielewski, (http:// www.beyondconsequences.com/ articles1.html), “As adoptive

parents move through the adoption experience, many

soon realize that the

literature (pamphlets, books,

‘honeymoon’ is over and that

articles) on adoption issues;

the stress and tension in

and lectures, seminars, work-

their families are at a level

shops, and classes focusing

in which outside help is

on adoption. Material ser-

Issue 3, September 2012

warranted. However, adop-

vices include adoption subsi- Adoption Support Group

tive mothers can perceive

dies, medical care, and spe-

asking for help as a fail-

cial education options. Clini-

ure.” The article mentions

cal services include counsel-

that adoptive mothers turn

ing for the child, couple, or

to friends, but then discov-

family, and respite care.”

er that outsiders do not

The article explains that

understand their situation.

material and clinical services

The article identifies three

are the most important for

types of post-adoption services. “Educational and in-

adoptive families. According 303-412-5118 to this article, “Research

formational services include

shows that finding qualified

requesting more complete

therapeutic help for adopted

information about the

children is an extremely

child’s history; request for

(Continued to pg. 2)

Community SpotlightRobert M. Shopneck Boys & Girls Club Upon arriving at the Shopneck Boys & Girls Club in Brighton, you will see a large variety of kids, from ages 6 to 18. The youth may use computers, receive homework help, and enjoy art time and fun with friends. There is a separate area for the teens. They also have a Garden Club where youth have the chance to soil,

Adams County Human Services Department

plant, and maintain the garden until time to harvest. Several sports are offered throughout the year. The Club can pick up children after school at: North Elementary, Pennock Elementary, Overland Trails Middle School, South and Southeast Elementary. During the school year, the facility is open from 2:30pm until

9:00pm. They offer afternoon snacks and an early dinner. The Boys and Girls Club branches in the Denver Metro area offer similar services for about $2 per year for each child. Contact your local branch to get updated information. To contact The Robert M. Shopneck branch call 303637-7272.

3rd Tuesday of each month, 5:30pm—7:30pm, CFC building, 7401 N. Broadway, Denver, 80221 Next meetings: Sept. 18, 5:30-7:30pm Open Discussion Oct. 16, 5:30-7:30pm Open Discussion Please RSVP with Elizabeth Miller,

Inside this issue: Is it Time for Therapy?

1

Community Spotlight— Boys & Girls Club

1

Is it Time for Therapy? (Continued)

2

Children to Know

3

Getting Kids Up and Out

3

Adoptive Families’ Picnic

4

Culture Pass Program

4

Services for Children with Developmental Disabilities

5

Top Ten List

5


Is it Time for Therapy? (Continued) difficult challenge itself.” Many

ment, personality; persistent malaise or

Center for Adoption Support and Ed-

times adoptive parents determine

apathy; risk-taking behaviors; dramatic

ucation (C.A.S.E.), a non-profit adop-

that “The therapists do not under-

drop in school performance; suicidal

tive family support center, “…has con-

stand how to treat adopted children

thoughts; difficulty sustaining relation-

vened a group of nationally recog-

with complex histories and therapists

ships.”

nized experts, including parents, who

do not have a working knowledge of the relationship between the adopted child and the adoptive parents.”

If therapy seems to be the next step, you should work directly with the Behavioral Health Organization (BHO) in

The Adoption Exchange (http://

your area to identify an adoption com-

tae.convio.net/site/PageServer?

petent therapist who is a good fit with

pagename=adoption_post_coparc_therapist)

your family. The link to the BHO cus-

has an article from (www.adoptivefamilies.com), “Do We Need a Therapist? How to Decide- and How to Find One.” The article compiled by Susan Freivalds, suggests some things to consider or do prior to pursuing therapy: 1) Learn about child development to identify if your child’s behaviors are normal; 2) Consider if there has been a change in the family that may be triggering the behavior; 3)

tomer service lines and the Office of Member and Family Affairs for each service area is: (http://www.colorado.gov/ cs/Satellite/HCPF/HCPF/1212398231156).

For further assistance in accessing services, contact the Medicaid Ombudsman for Managed Care at 303-830-3560 or 1-877-435-7123 outside metro Denver. Family Voices Colorado (1-877-7316017) can also advocate for your family.

“Seek out parenting classes or advice

The article: “Do We Need a Thera-

from a parenting expert”; 4) Let your

pist?...” has questions for choosing a

child know that you are open to talk

therapist: “What is your experience

about adoption; 5) Give your child op-

with adoption?” What issues do you be-

portunities to interact with other

lieve may affect adoptees and can be

children who have been adopted; and

helped by therapy?; What experience

6) Join a support group. The Adop-

do you have in dealing with similar situa-

tion Exchange website (http://

tions?; Does the therapist “…appear to

www.adoptex.org/site/PageServer?

know how children think about adoption

pagename=adoption_post_coparc_main) has

at different developmental levels?”;

links to search for adoptive parent

What information about our family do

support groups and mental health pro-

you need to know?. Helpful information

fessionals with adoption training/

should include: (“what led the parents

experience. The same article, “Do We

to adopt;” how the family talks about

Need a Therapist? ...” also offers

adoption; and what impact the parents

situations when therapeutic profes-

believe adoption has on their child’s be-

sional help is needed, such as:

havior);”

“inconsolable, persistent crying; chronic worry; being made fun of at school; significant change in temperaPage 2

According to the article WHAT DOES

identified the specific knowledge, skills, and values competencies that mental health practitioners need...” According to the survey, the adoption competent therapist “… understands the nature of adoption as a form of family formation and the different types of adoption; the clinical issues that are associated with separation and loss and attachment; the common developmental challenges in the experience of adoption; and the characteristics and skills that make adoptive families successful.”

“An adop-

tion competent mental health professional is skilled in using a range of therapies to effectively engage...families toward the mutual goal of helping individuals to heal, empowering parents to assume parental entitlement and authority, and assisting adoptive families to strengthen or develop and practice parenting skills that support healthy family relationships.” These findings are part of a multi-year initiative that C.A.S.E. has spear headed “…to expand the access...to adoption competent mental health professionals; to provide adoptive families with the mental health services they need to be stable and healthy and reduce rates of disruption and dissolution; and to strengthen the post adoption services offered by the mental health and child welfare systems nationwide.”

ADOPTION COMPETENCY MEAN?, the Adoption Newsletter


Michelle (10 yrs.), Jaelyn (6 1/2 yrs.) and Levi (4 1/2 yrs.) These three siblings need a loving adoptive family who will commit to them permanently. Michelle enjoys listening to music and pretending to be a famous singer.

Children to Know Levi is an active child who

Jovan is bright and he likes to learn.

as kicking and jumping

He is independent and enjoys being a

and is interested in play-

leader. His social skills continue to

ing sports. He seems to

improve and he is learning to maintain

engage well with adults

friendships.

ization skills with his peers.

and likes to strike up conversations. She has fun playing with her friends and siblings. Michelle is excelling in school and

Wars action figures that he values.

enjoys physical play such

and would benefit from gaining social-

Michelle is outgoing

Jovan has a large collection of Star

Jovan would do best in a patient, loving adoptive family where he would

Michelle, Jaelyn and Levi would bene-

receive a good deal of individual at-

fit from a two-parent family who

tention, structure and supervision.

could focus on their individual needs

He would benefit from a mom and dad

and promote a safe family environ-

able to model and teach him to be a

ment. Their family should offer good

strong and nurturing

learned.

supervision and consistency to help

young man. His adoptive parents

Jaelyn enjoys playing games and swim-

them develop personal boundaries. If you have an approved home study

should be skilled in

please contact Nikole Ordway, 303-

attachment and

412-5167.

should participate in

talks often about new things she has

ming. She likes fashion and choosing fun outfits for the upcoming week. Jaelyn enjoys being around other children, but can also entertain herself. She has an easygoing personality.

Jovan (11 yrs.) Jovan is an active guy with many interests. He enjoys playing outdoors, camping, fishing, reading, putting together puzzles, and watching movies.

family therapy with him. Jovan would do best in a home with no other children or one older child. If you have an approved home study, please contact Cathy Padilla, 303-412-5257.

Getting Kids Up and Out the Door School has started and the morning routine can be stressful. Here are a few ideas to start the day well. The following guidelines were provided from an article on www.attitudemag.com entitled “ Morning Routines for Children with ADHD: Rise and Shine for School�. While this article is for a specific population the rules seem to be useful for all children. Long Term Planning: Establish and go over the morning routine with your child over the weekend and for severIssue 3, September 2012

al nights prior to get him prepared for the events of the morning. The Night Before: Plan for an early bedtime. Children need approximately nine full hours of sleep, depending on their age, to feel rested. Provide a protein rich bed time snack. This will help sleep come quickly and keep them full so they do not wake up due to hunger at night. Examples would be cheese, pumpkin or sunflower seeds, or peanut butter and crackers. Get backpacks and lunches ready the night before .

Waking Up: Using an alarm clock may help your child with starting his own routine. Another way to wake your child would be to let light into the room and give your child time to wake up before beginning the morning routine. From Bed to Door: Have your child eat a healthy breakfast to help her focus longer and to be more prepared for the stresses of the morning. Reward your child and give her good feedback for a good morning.

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Adoptive Families’ Picnic On June 15, 2012, adoptive families gathered for a picnic at E.B. Rains Park in Northglenn. There was food, face painting, and socializing. It was a wonderful turn out of approximately 30 people. The focus of the party was for adoptive parents to network, provide support for each other, and have fun. The hope is that the party will be an annual event organized for and by the Adams County adoptive parent community. Due to the success of the picnic, families may want to gather again in October or November, for a more low-key event. Please let Liz Miller (EMiller@adcogov.org) know if you would like to help organize this event or if you have ideas of a location that would be inexpensive and fun. There is no funding available, so it could be families meeting for an activity: bowling, hay ride, pumpkin patch, etc.

Drawing by John M.

Culture Pass Program The Jefferson County Public Library Culture Pass Program For those of you with a Jeffco Library card, we recommend you look into this program. You can get passes to:

Denver

Firefighters Museum, Denver Museum of Miniatures, Dolls and Toys, Dinosaur Ridge, Foothills Art Center, Golden History Museums, MCA Denver, Rocky Mountain Quilt Museum, The Hudson Gardens & Event Center (which, this time of year, is currently free admission). You can get the passes up to 30 days in advance, with a max of two passes booked per 30 day period. You can do this from your own computer or visit the library for more information. You will need your library card to make the reservation.

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Adoption Newsletter


Services for Children with Developmental Disabilities A Community Center Board (CCB) is an organization designed to help with long-term services and support systems to people with developmental disabilities. Although there is likely to be a very long wait-list, it’s important to get your child on the list if they qualify. Services are provided for children from birth and last throughout their lives and vary based on the child’s needs. When a child is in foster care, they are not included on the waitlist. Even if a child was on the list prior to being in foster care, their name is dropped from the list as soon as the biological parent loses custody. That is why it is extremely important that you contact your local CCB as soon as you finalize. There will be children who have been on the list since birth. Some services offered through the CCB’s include case management, referral assistance, therapy and educational supports, financial resources, services for families with children who have intensive behavioral and/or medical needs, and for families who have children at risk of being hospitalized or admitted to a nursing facility. There may also be special services for children with Autism. If you think your child may qualify, contact your local CCB (http:// www.colorado.gov/cs/Satellite/CDHS-VetDis/CBON/1251586997819). For Adams County, contact North Metro Community Services at (303) 252-7199, or visit their website at http:// www.nmetro.org/index.php.

Top Ten: Most Unusual Places Your Child’s Shoes Were Found 10. In the back yard from a dog taking them out 9. In the hamper 8. Under their sibling’s bed 7. In the dog’s water bowl 6. Under the child’s spaghetti plate 5. In the garbage 4. Under a planter, in the water tray 3. In a hamster’s cage 2. In the fish tank And the #1 most unusual place a shoe has been found: In the foot of the pajamas while he was wearing them. Thank you for the feedback. Our next topic will be: Top Ten: Places to Celebrate Fall with your Children. Please forward responses to nordway@adcogov.org. I look forward to your responses.

Issue 3, September 2012

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