Flashback - Surviving Breast Cancer

OCTOBER 2020

The day the retirement ship came to “all stop”

By Holly Shaffner

Never ever did I think I would hear the three words that would forever change my life… “You have cancer.”

All the cancer survivors I have ever talked to know exactly when and where they were when they heard the news. For me, it was June 14, 2010 at 4:45 p.m. in a general surgeon’s office.

The background on getting to that day was surreal. After 23 years of military service, I was six weeks away from retiring. My friends and family had plane tickets and hotel reservations to my retirement ceremony and parties, I had been admitted to San Diego State University for that fall, and I was ready for the next chapter. I was having my retirement physical when the mammogram technician noticed something on my scans that she wanted the radiologist to see. She brought him into the room, he looked at the images and said, “There’s an area that we need to look at with an ultrasound.” I burst out in tears and told him, “But I’m too young to have breast cancer.” He never said the Big C word, but I knew. I was 41 years old and as it turns out I was not too young. Three days after the biopsy, my suspicions were confirmed when I heard those three life-changing words. That was the day my retirement plans came to a stop and the next chapters in my life were rewritten.

I left the doctor’s office in tears, went to the silence of my car, and called my sister. I told her that this was not a death sentence because I had too much to live for. I vowed to fight so that I could see my niece and nephew grow up, go to college, get married, and have children. They were three and six years old at the time.

The next nine months were filled with surgeries, 16 rounds of chemo, flushing the medicines from my body, genetic testing, and 30 rounds of radiation therapy. I know it sounds like a lot. I got through the journey doing it the only way I knew how…just figuring it out day to day.

Kathy Bruyere volunteering at Miramar National Cemetery I still remember the day when my oncologist told me that Photo by: Nelvin C. Cepeda San Diego Union-Tribune the pathology report revealed my cancer was aggressive. She said, “This is going to be a marathon, not a sprint” and told me that I needed chemotherapy. Just like many women, the girl in me asked her if I was going to lose my hair. She was honest and said, “yes.” As it turns out, losing my hair was not so bad – it was temporary, and hopefully that treatment killed all the potential free flowing bad cells so that I live a long life.

After my second round of chemo, my hair started falling out. In true Holly style, I had it all planned out. I had my stylist cut it to a pixie cut so I was “ready”. Well, nothing prepares you when it starts to fall out in clumps in the shower, when it is in your pillow every morning, your shower drain, and all over your counters. I realized then that there was one thing I could control and so I got out my electric razor and shaved as much as I could. Then I got soap, lathered my hands, and got to work shaving my head with a new razor. I figured it was just like shaving your legs, right?

Going through the cancer journey was THE hardest thing I have ever done; but it taught me so many things. I learned that even on your toughest days how important it was to stay positive. From that call to my sister until my “free and clean” scan, I never thought I wouldn’t beat it. I learned that cancer does not discriminate. Cancer doesn’t care if you are old, young, rich, poor, white, black, brown, gay, or straight – it will find you. And I learned how important it was to allow people to help you and to ask for help. I will be forever grateful to my family, friends, and co-workers for being my support network. It was because of them that I could take the time I needed to heal my body.

The most important thing I learned through all of this was the importance of early detection. There is no doubt that I am here today because of that mammogram tech who saw something abnormal on my scan. As it turned out, the tumor was so deep on my chest wall that the ONLY way to find it was through a mammogram.

So, in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I encourage you to have those mammogram conversations with the special women in your life – your mother, wife, sister, aunt, and best friend. Ask them when they are due for their mammogram and encourage them to go. If they say they are not going because they are afraid, then offer to go with them – it is THAT important.

Since arriving to San Diego, I have become a volunteer with the American Cancer Society and was a peer mentor for newly diagnosed women, national trainer of the mentors, walked in numerous Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walks, and helped to raise hundreds of dollars for breast cancer research.

For all those years, I looked up to my fellow pink ribbon warriors who made it to 5, 10, 20, 30 years as a survivor. Well, this year I hit a milestone. I am a 10-year cancer survivor and I look forward to the next 50 years! For information about cancer resources, go to:

www.cancer.org

What You Need To Know

Cancer is a disease in which cells in the body grow out of control. When cancer starts in the breast, it is called breast cancer. Except for skin cancer, breast cancer is the most common cancer in American women.

Breast cancer screening means checking a woman’s breasts for cancer before she has any symptoms. A mammogram is an X-ray picture of the breast. Mammograms are the best way to find breast cancer early, when it is easier to treat and before it is big enough to feel or cause symptoms.

Most women who are 50 to 74 years old should have

a screening mammogram every two years. If you are 40 to 49 years old, or think you may have a higher risk of breast cancer, ask your doctor when to have a screening mammogram.

Some things may increase your risk

The main factors that influence your breast cancer risk are being a woman and getting older. Other risk factors include— • Changes in breast cancer-related genes (BRCA1 or BRCA2). • Having your first menstrual period before age 12. • Never giving birth, or being older when your first child is born. • Starting menopause after age 55. • Taking hormones to replace missing estrogen and progesterone in menopause for more than five years. • Taking oral contraceptives (birth control pills). • A personal history of breast cancer, dense breasts, or some other breast problems. • A family history of breast cancer (parent, sibling, or child). • Getting radiation therapy to the breast or chest. • Being overweight, especially after menopause.

For More Information

www.cdc.gov/cancer/breast/ • (800) CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) • TTY: (888) 232-6348

Haven’t had a mammogram?

With no-cost mammograms* available at professional, medical facilities, there’s no reason to wait. The sooner you have a mammogram, the greater your chances are of finding cancer in its early stages and making a full recovery. It’s your life. Go live it.