Healthy Living July 2017

FEAST OR FAMINE

The importance of

AGE GRACEFULLY OR LOOK YOUNG?

We asked locals which they prefer

MAKE A MOVE

Find a way to move that makes you happy and helps your body get in shape, too!

HAPPY TRAILS

Staying safe while exercising outdoors

1:08 a.m.

You wake up with chest pain.

1:28 a.m.

You arrive at the freestanding ER.

2:02 a.m.

You realize you should have come to Leesburg Regional Medical Center.

Our ER contains both an MI (heart attack) Treatment Center and a Primary Stroke Center. Additionally, our board-certified emergency physicians have access to an entire Heart Institute, the area’s only neurosurgery team and more than 100 other specialists. All right here. It’s a higher level of care that makes our ER worth the wait.

Learn more and download our free ER app at LeesburgRegional.org

Your partners for life

Dr. Will Barsoum joined the team at Cardiovascular Associates in January 2017. To say he is thrilled about this exciting opportunity would be an understatement.

“The practice has developed an excellent reputation because the doctors are ethical, knowledgeable, and caring,” he said. “I share their vision of delivering quality cardiovascular care to the wonderful residents of Lake County.”

Dr. Barsoum attended medical school at St. George’s University School of Medicine in Grenada and completed a residency and two fellowships at Seton Hall University in New Jersey. He brings a unique skill set to Cardiovascular Associates and is experienced in treating peripheral vascular disease and pulmonary embolism.

“For me, it’s a major milestone whenever I can improve a patient’s quality of life and increase their longevity.”

He previously practiced in Lake County for more than two years before moving to Orlando.

“I’m happy to be returning to the area. This is where I want to raise my family. We have the best of both worlds. There is plenty of nature, but you don’t have to look far for shopping and entertainment.”

Serving Lake County

MY HIP IS A-OK THANKS TO AOI.

For all of our advanced technologies and leading edge breakthroughs in joint repair and replacement, the advancements we at AOI are most proud of are those that our patients make in reclaiming their quality of life. If you are experiencing pain or weakness in a knee, shoulder, or hip and feel it’s time to do something about it, there’s no time like right now. Come see us, we’re here for you.

John T. Williams Jr. Orthopedic Surgeon

Alfred J. Cook Jr. Orthopedic Surgeon

Vaginal dryness putting

ONTENTS

July 2017

FEATURING

22 // LOOK GOOD, FEEL GOOD

There are many different ways to look good and feel good. First, you can achieve a level of physical attractiveness to bolster your confidence. You can also adopt an improved eating regimen to help you become healthier in everyday life. We’ve also asked random Lake County residents whether they prefer aging gracefully or if they should achieve beauty at all costs.

32 // BUST A MOVE

You don’t have to pay a monthly gym fee to burn calories and stay fit. From pickleball and horseshoes to belly dancing and rollerskating, there are many creative ways to stay trim and in tip-top shape.

HEALTHYBODY

YUMMY AND NUTRITIOUS

44 Are you tired of being a shrimp and want to look like Popeye? Then try this wonderful spinach and shrimp salad.

EXERCISE: IT DOES A BODY GOOD

46 Our level of physical fitness shapes our self-esteem.

AVOID BECOMING A HOT MESS

48 How to exercise safely outdoors.

HEALTHYMIND

STRESS SMARTS

52 Ways to increase your stress resilience.

STAY ONE STEP AHEAD OF ANXIETY

54 Running is a wonderful way to reduce anxiety.

HEALTHYSPIRIT

BAD THOUGHTS? THAT’S A NEGATIVE

58 Overcome negativity bias to improve your relationships.

HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART

60 How to be more empathetic toward others.

HEALTHYFINANCE

DON’T GO FOR BROKE

64 7 financial sins that leave you with empty pockets.

ON THE ROAD TO SAVING MONEY

66 Supplying your own travel food makes perfect cents.

HOT OFF THE PRESS !

SUBSCRIPTIONS: Order a subscription of your favorite magazine to be delivered directly to your home for just $72. Each subscription includes 12 consecutive issues of Lake & Sumter Style, Village Style or Healthy Living. Choose 2 or more magazines for $85 per year. To order, call 352.787.4112 or mail us at: Subscriptions at Akers Media, P.O. Box 490088, Leesburg, FL 34749.

CHANGE OF ADDRESS: If you are a seasonal resident or have moved, send your address change request to general@ akersmediagroup.com or mail us at: Subscriptions at Akers Media, P.O. Box 490088, Leesburg, FL 34749.

BACK ISSUES: Order a single issue by mail for $7, or 2 or more single issues for $9. To pick up a back issue from our office, please call 24 hours in advance.

DOUG AKERS / president doug@akersmediagroup.com

KENDRA AKERS / publisher/editor-in-chief kendra@akersmediagroup.com

JAMIE EZRA MARK / chief creative officer jamie@akersmediagroup.com

EDITORIAL // DESIGN // PHOTOGRAPHY

LEIGH NEELY managing editor leigh@akersmediagroup.com

JAMES COMBS staff writer james@akersmediagroup.com

THERESA CAMPBELL staff writer theresa@akersmediagroup.com

CHRIS GERBASI staff writer chris@akersmediagroup.com

BREAK THE CYCLE OF LOW SELF-ESTEEM

JASON FUGATE creative director jason@akersmediagroup.com

VOLKAN ULGEN art director volkan@akersmediagroup.com

JOSH CLARK senior designer josh@akersmediagroup.com

MICHAEL GAULIN production director michael@akersmediagroup.com

FRED LOPEZ chief photographer // fred@akersmediagroup.com

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

FRED HILTON, RICHARD T. BOSSHARDT M.D., JAIME ALONSO, BRIDGET WEBBER, B.E. CONRAD, SUSIE YAKOWICS

SALES // MARKETING

TIM MCRAE / vice president of sales tim@akersmediagroup.com

MIKE STEGALL advertising executive mike@akersmediagroup.com

CREE HOWARD sales executive assistant cree@akersmediagroup.com

Do you ever tell yourself that you are not good enough or unworthy? If so, you are not alone. Low self-esteem is a common problem that can trigger or worsen the symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other mental health conditions. The negative and self-critical thoughts experienced by those living with low self-esteem can lead to a cycle of low mood and feelings of worthlessness, making it ever more difficult to deal with work, family, and everyday problems. Breaking the cycle of low selfesteem takes time and commitment, but the results can be life- changing.

Feelings of low self-worth often begin in childhood, particularly if parents are excessively critical. Children with a history of abuse, neglect, or being bullied are especially prone to feelings of low self-worth later in life. However, low self-esteem also can be the result of negative life experiences in adulthood, such as a relationship breakdown, job loss, death of a loved one, or being diagnosed with a serious illness. Underlying mental health problems, such as depression, bipolar disorder, or anxiety disorder, can also trigger low self-esteem.

For these reasons, we dedicate our July issue each year to looking good and feeling good about yourself. It’s not about how you look; it’s about how you feel about yourself. Evidence has shown that when someone feels good about their appearance—and they feel healthy—they ultimately value themselves more.

JACQUELYN SINGER advertising executive jacquelyn@akersmediagroup.com

TATIANNA GELIGA sales executive assistant tatianna@akersmediagroup.com

ADMINISTRATION

DEB MATLOCK / office manager deb@akersmediagroup.com

AUBREY AKERS / advertising coordinator aubrey@akersmediagroup.com

DISTRIBUTION

SCOTT HEGG / distribution manager scott.hegg@akersmediagroup.com

DIGITAL SOCIAL MEDIA

GARRETT REARDON / digital specialist garrett@akersmediagroup.com

Making just a few small changes to your lifestyle can make a big difference in the way you feel about yourself. Cutting down on stimulants such as caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol can help reduce stress levels, while increasing the amount of fresh fruit and vegetables in your diet ensures adequate nutrition and helps improve mental health. Learning a new skill, getting involved with a worthy cause, or engaging in social activities may give you a new sense of purpose and help build your sense of self-worth.

We hope you find this month’s issue helpful and that it encourages you to make the necessary adjustments in your life so you can look good and feel even better.

Until next month, Kendra Akers

LRMC HAS ANOTHER MEDICAL FIRST

patients with coronary artery disease the world’s first FDA-approved dissolving heart stent.

Stents are traditionally made of metal, but Abbott’s Absorb stent is similar to dissolving sutures and disappears completely in about three years. This allows time to keep the clogged artery open and provide healing for the treated artery segment.

“Traditionally, we would treat a patient with coronary artery disease with a metal stent, and it would stay with them for the rest of their life,” says Dr. Srinivas Attanti, a board-certified interventional cardiologist with Citrus Cardiology Consultants, PA, and staff member at LRMC. “Now, just like a doctor treating someone for a broken bone would remove a cast when the injury is healed, we’re able to use a stent that naturally dissolves after the artery is healed. This leaves the artery with the ability to pulse and flex naturally.”

This is especially good news for older patients who are unable to take the essential blood thinners needed with a traditional metal stent. LRMC’s interventional cardiology team participated in specialized training to use the new device.

In addition, LRMC recently announced that it is among the first hospitals in Florida to offer the world’s smallest pacemaker for patients with bradycardia. The Micra® Transcatheter Pacing System (TPS) is a new type of heart device. It is approved for Medicare reimbursement and is one-tenth the size of a traditional pacemaker.

“We believe this is the start of a new era in pacemakers,” says Dr. Hector Garcia, a board-certified interventional cardiologist with Florida Cardiovascular Specialists and staff member at LRMC. “The absence of leads is one of the main advantages of the pacemaker. The elimination of the wires connecting the device to the heart makes for a less invasive procedure and reduces risk of complications for the patient.”

The Micra® TPS is the only system to be approved for MRI scans, and allows patients and doctors to send data remotely through the Medtronic CareLink® Network.

EMPOWERING YOUTH

Florida Hospital Waterman will host its Safe Sitter classes from 8am4pm July 27 and Aug. 3 according to their website. This course is designed to help students between ages 11 and 13 gain the confidence and ability to take care of themselves and young children without adult supervision. Six certified instructors will lead the one-day programs, and students will learn how to administer first aid, choking child rescue, and CPR, and how to manage their own babysitting business.

“The skills learned in this program are a true asset to our community’s youth,” says Mary Narmore, MSNEd, CMSRN, manager of education, Florida Hospital Waterman. “After participating in Safe Sitter, students feel more confident caring for younger children, and parents can rest at ease knowing their teens are prepared to handle emergencies.”

TRIVIA TIME:

Q: What year was the Lake-Sumter Medical Society formed?

Please make an educated guess before looking at the answer

A: The Lake-Sumter Medical Society was established in

BIGGER AND BETTER

will also be separate entrances for patients and ambulances.

and will include a second helicopter pad.

BREASTFEEDING RATE INCREASE

Mothers who participate in the WIC program have increased the breastfeeding rate to 79 percent, according to the Florida Department of Health in Lake County. This is especially exciting because it was one of the objectives in the Health People 2020, which hoped to reach 81.9 percent. The Breastfeeding Peer Counselors and an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant also coordinated care with local hospitals.

“Due to the joint efforts of WIC and Florida Hospital Waterman,, Leesburg Regional Medical Center, and South Lake Hospital, the WIC breastfeeding rates have increased in our county” states Mary Stickney, Florida Department of Health in Lake County WIC Director. “I’m really proud of what we have

accomplished thus far and excited about the direction we are going.”

In an effort to integrate the 10 Steps to Successful Breastfeeding into the maternity care practices, Florida Hospital Waterman, Leesburg Regional, and South Lake Hospital are working toward the Baby-Friendly Hospital Designation, a global program launched by the World Health Organization and the United Nations Children’s Fund.

For more information about monthly support group meetings, contact Jennifer Bacon at 352-771-5563. To learn more about the benefits of breastfeeding visit www.llli.org;,or flbreastfeeding.org. For information about the Florida WIC program call 1.800.342.3556 or visit www.FloridaWIC.org.

The expansion of the emergency room will provide 22,000 square feet, almost double the size it is now. This space will add an additional 24 ER rooms, all of them private with solid walls. There will be a FasTTrack option for minor complaints to move patients through the process much quicker. Another new feature is less noise. The staff will be voice- and datalinked to one another so there will be no need for intercom. Secure areas away from the general public will be provided to treat criminal and drug-related admissions.

Healthy Inspiration

TALKING ABOUT TURNER SYNDROME

“She’s complicated,” Chet Abbott says. “I’m a good child, though,” Bailey responds.

WRITER: LEIGH NEELY PHOTO: FRED LOPEZ

Bailey Abbott is a vivacious 8-year-old second-grader at The Villages Charter School. She loves the dogs and cats that live on the family farm. She enjoys swinging in her tree swing and recently learned to ride her bike, an accomplishment that’s very difficult for a little girl with Turner syndrome.

This condition affects only girls and women—one in 2,000. Females have two complete X chromosomes, the sex chromosomes. For those with Turner syndrome, there’s an absence of all or part of the second X chromosome in all or some of the body’s cells. Physical features of girls with Turner syndrome include short stature and lack of ovarian development.

“We were lucky the pediatrician at Leesburg Regional Medical Center recognized the symptoms immediately after Bailey was born,” her mom Ashley says. “Her hands and feet were swollen, she was abnormally short, only 17 inches long, and he ordered blood tests to confirm it. Most girls are not diagnosed until they are 9 or older.”

She has only one kidney and had to have surgery for aortic coarctation when she was 3 weeks old. Now, she takes a growth hormone injection every night.

The Abbotts take Bailey to the Turner Syndrome Center at the University of Florida.

One of the only centers in the southeastern United States that provides specialized care for these girls, the center includes pediatric endocrinology, cardiology, nutrition, and psychology, and also has a research center.

Girls with Turner syndrome take about seven times longer to learn things. That’s why it was important to Bailey that she learn to ride her bicycle. She also wanted to learn to ride at a younger age than her older sister, Tenley.

“She about wore me out, but she did it,” says Bailey’s father, Chet.

Ashley adds, “It’s very hard for girls with Turner syndrome to learn to ride a bike because they have difficulty with balance.”

After connecting with the UF clinic, the Abbotts also attended a national conference focusing on Turner syndrome, and came away with more knowledge and lots of new friends who had daughters like theirs. It was a pivotal moment for them. They soon organized their first walk to raise funds for research and recently had the third one. In total, they’ve raised about $75,000. They now want to raise money locally to help families with financial issues attend national conferences to learn more.

Recently, Bailey stood in front of her classmates and explained Turner syndrome to them, which made her parents very proud. Bailey just smiles and says, “I’m tough.”

That place right now is The Heart of the Villages. Our physicians and medical professionals have been treating Central Floridians for years with a level of exemplary cardio care that comes straight from the heart. We’re in a new location now, but our hearts are where they’ve always been—with you and the health of your family.

New location! The Oaks Professional Center, 8575 NE 138th Lane Call today for a consultation at 352.674.2080 heartofthevillages.com

Life is precious when your the right place.

Medical Mysteries

WHAT REALLY MAKES YOUR STOMACH GROWL

WRITER: FRED HILTON

It always happens when it’s very, very quiet—the worst possible time. It might be when you’re in church and the silent prayer just started. Or maybe it’s during a movie when there is no dialogue and something important is about to happen. Or it could be when you’re at dinner and trying to impress your hot blind date.

Always at one of these special moments, a low grumbling starts in the area of your stomach and grows louder and louder and louder. You’re sure the noise is reverberating off the walls. You know that everyone in the room is looking at you and giggling.

The rude noise from your innards is nothing new. The ancient Greeks gave it a name: borbroygmi (pronounced BOR-boh-RIG-me). It’s an attempt to put the sound into words. It translates as “rumbling.”

You’ve always figured the sound was your stomach reminding you it’s

time to eat. Actually, the noise may or may not accompany hunger, and it is probably coming from your intestines, not your stomach. The rumbling sound is the result of muscular contractions of your intestinal wall combined with the presence of liquid and gas.

“Though stomach growling is commonly heard and associated with hunger and an absence of food in the stomach, it can occur at any time, on an empty or full stomach,” says Dr. Mark A.W. Andrews, an associate professor of physiology at the Lake Erie College of Osteopathic Medicine in Pennsylvania. “Furthermore, growling doesn’t only come from the stomach but, just as often, can be heard coming from the small intestines. Growling is more commonly associated with hunger because it is typically louder when the stomach and intestines are empty, and so the organs’ contents don’t muffle the noise.”

Dr. Laurence Bailen, an assistant professor at Tufts University School of Medicine in Massachusetts, says it’s not really clear why your stomach growls when you haven’t eaten in a long time.

“Putting food into your system often quiets the noise, because the food takes up space and your digestive muscles become more focused on breaking down and absorbing the food than on moving the air around,” he says.

When you’re hungry, the growling may be louder simply “because your stomach and intestines are empty, so the noise created is not muffled,” Dr. Shawn Khodadadian, a New York City gastroenterologist, told FoxNews.com.

Swallowing air when you eat is one cause of abdominal growling, so eat slowly and chew with your mouth shut (just like your mother told you).

Another option when the growling starts is to point at the person sitting next to you.

Breast cancer is one of the most diagnosed cancers for women. 1 in 8 women (12.5%) will develop breast cancer in their lifetimes. If your primary care doctor or gynecologist is concerned you may have something going on in the breast you may have been referred to a surgeon. Surgeons are trained in diagnosing and treating all forms of breast disease from the simple to the most complex, including cancer.

At Mid-Florida Surgical Associates, our doctors take special care of those women who have been sent to us for a breast issue. We have the ability to do in-office ultrasound and even in-office biopsies if needed. Sometimes a simple ultrasound can make all the worry about breast disease dissipate, however if a biopsy is needed being able to do some of them in the office can also ease some of the worry and expense.

If you are diagnosed with a disease that requires more intense treatments, our doctors lead the way. Our physicians and staff will help guide you through the complex treatment planning. We work closely with several other specialists in the area to be able to offer the most advanced and appropriate treatment to our patients.

Our physicians are all members of The American Society of Breast Surgeons, credentialed and trained in minimally invasive biopsies as well as all surgical treatments of breast disease.

If you or a loved one have an issue with your breast or are concerned about having a breast disease, know that we have your back. Know that the doctors of Mid-Florida Surgical Associates are here for you.

Our website, www.MidFloridaSurgical.com provides information regarding each of our surgeons.

Michael A. Freedman, DO

S. Dwight Vaught, MD

Judith Milstead, MD

Dino Madonna, MD

The nation’s largest dermatology practice has three locations in The Villages® community. We now accept UnitedHealthcare Medicare Advantage.

352.753.2812

Dr. Michael Bond

Dr. William Steffes

Dr. Christine Moorhead

Scott Clark, PA-C

Nicole Hwa, PA-C

Anita Lockhart, Licensed Aesthetician

Dr. Michael Bond

Dr. Michael Burton

Introducing Michael E. Burton, MD Cosmetic Surgery of the Body, Breasts and Face

In the hands of a highly-skilled surgeon, the enhancement of the human form becomes part medicine, part art.

While training with world-renowned leaders in the field of Plastic Surgery, Dr. Burton also pursued a degree in fine arts, with advanced courses in figure drawing, painting, and sculpture.

As an international volunteer with Operation Smile, his skill and commitment to compassionate care led him to help children with cleft lip and palate deformities lead better lives.

Now, he’s bringing his skills to our offices in The Villages® to help you look as young as you feel.

Brownwood Paddock Square™

LOOK GOOD FEEL

Your face and body often ect how you’re feeling inside. Feeling good is not just an emotion, it’s a way of life. No matter how busy you are, there are ways to put yourself first and feel good about you. You don’t always have to adhere to a strict regimen of diet and exercise. Often, it’s the little changes you make that create the biggest differences. Looking good and feeling good is possible—you just have to find the way to do it that best suits your needs and lifestyle.

EXUDING

ONFIDENCE

Confidence comes from within, but it is certainly helped along if you feel good about how you look.

WRITER: THERESA CAMPBELL

Putting on a little lipstick and mascara can give women a “feel good” lift, so it’s not surprising a makeover of a new hairstyle, facial treatment, makeup, and wellfitting fashions can do wonders to bolster confidence.

Studies show men and women rate feeling confident as an “attractive trait.” Villages resident and former New Yorker Barbara Iannielli, boutique consultant for Stein Mart in Lady Lake, loves helping women feel more beautiful and powerful with clothing that complements their skin tone and highlights their best features.

“I believe every woman can look beautiful. It doesn’t matter her size, height, weight,” says Barbara, who recently dressed local fashion show models of all shapes in cold shoulder tops, swing dresses, and palazzo pants.

“To me, you should be proud of who you are; everybody is not meant to be a size 4,” she says, while also stressing there are more clothing colors besides black.

“A lot of people just want black; they feel it’s slimming,” she says. “I have put extra-large-size women in flower prints and they are amazed. I will never make somebody take something that I like on them that they are not comfortable in, because they will not wear it. You have to feel people’s comfort zone, and I do abide by that.”

To determine a person’s best colors to wear, Barbara aims to

accentuate the eyes, skin color, and hair. She also relishes moments when people try on clothes they wouldn’t have thought of wearing only to discover they love how the outfit looks.

“A lot of people are very against wearing dresses, and why wouldn’t you put yourself in a sundress in the dead of heat? It doesn’t have to be dress up. People have this stigma that being in a dress is dressy and they cannot wear it. I think being in a dress makes you feel feminine. It makes you feel like a woman and it’s radiant,” Barbara says.

Makeover with hair and makeup

Dina Simpson, co-owner of Renew Day Spa in Leesburg, has years of experience as a stylist and previously served as manager of Cal’s Barber and Beauty in The Villages.

She believes it’s vital to get to know the person’s personality, lifestyle, hobbies, and other traits to determine the best hairstyle to complement their face shape.

“I definitely accentuate their better parts,” she says of hair and makeup. “If they have beautiful eyes, you want to open up where their eye sockets are, or accentuate strong cheekbones. It’s just bringing out the beautiful person that is within.”

Dina suggests picking one specific facial area to focus on with makeup, such as the eyes or lips. “Eyebrows play a big part,” she adds. Eyelash enhancements are coming back, too, along with hair pieces and wigs.

“I know that when you leave here, I can make you look fantastic, but that is not a compliment to me unless you can go home and create it yourself,” she says.

Surgical/nonsurgical options

Dr. Dino Madonna, boardcertified facial plastic surgeon and otolaryngologist with Face 2 Face in The Villages and Leesburg, delights in seeing the transformation of patients who feel better about how they look after a procedure.

“We make them feel fresher and rejuvenated,” he says. “I think when you have that confidence behind you, it shows in everything that you do.”

Several nonsurgical options are available, including injectables and facial fillers for a quick boost, or resurfacing, such as the Silkpeel, a popular treatment without downtime that he says often leaves patients with a “nice glow.”

Among the popular surgical procedures are lower face lifts, neck lifting, brow lifting, eyelid rejuvenation and rhinoplasty, or reshaping the nose.

“People are afraid of the plastic look, and we do not strive for that at all. A more natural look is our goal,” he says, adding it’s important to have a faceto-face consultation with patients to identify their goals.

“It can be life-changing from an attitude standpoint,” Dr. Madonna says of patients achieving desired results. “Looking good and feeling good goes hand-in-hand.”

MELISSA YOUNG, 53, SORRENTO

Her philosophy: “Aging gracefully and being as healthy as possible for as long as possible. I think more people here are into an active lifestyle and not worried about how they look or that they look younger.”

On cosmetic surgery: “Not [for] me personally. It’s an individual choice. If some people want to do it because they may feel better about themselves, then good for them.”

On colorful hair: “You can do it if you’re 10, you can do it if you’re 90.”

AGING GRACEFULLY

The ‘Man on the Street’ says health beats looks any day

WRITER AND PHOTOS: CHRIS GERBASI

When comedian Billy Crystal was a cast member on “Saturday Night Live,” he played a narcissistic character named Fernando whose credo was, “It is better to look good than to feel good.”

That was in the 1980s. Fernando, if he took care of himself, might have a different take today. As people stay active and live longer, how should they look as they age? Should they remain “age appropriate” or go for cosmetic surgery? Is there an age limit for purple hair?

Local residents answered the question, “Do you prefer to age gracefully or look young at all costs?”

STEPHEN PESHEK, 34, UMATILLA

His philosophy: The outdoor maintenance worker hopes to age naturally and worries about the effects of the sun while on the job, but wouldn’t resort to cosmetic surgery.

“I think that has to do with attention. Older men may want to look younger to attract younger women, and vice versa [for older women], and there’s no law against that.”

FRED ARRENDELL, 81, MOUNT DORA

His philosophy: His associates are either old or young; no in between. Does associating with young people keep you young? “No. It’s just in my genes.” On cosmetic surgery: He looks younger than his age, but never felt the need for cosmetic enhancements: “Whatever Mother Nature gives me, I’ll take it.” His advice for longevity: “Take a slow pace in life.”

ANTHONY NOBLE, 67, LAKE PANASOFKEE

His philosophy: The former runner says a healthy body is more important than worrying about the effects of aging. “It’s a natural phenomenon, and as long as I’m healthy, that’s the primary goal. Looks and youth are fleeting, as we all know, so I’m satisfied to be what I am.”

On cosmetic surgery: “I’ve known some that seemed maybe somewhat obsessed with looks, and don’t get me wrong, I understand it. It’s up to each individual.”

VS.

FOREVER YOUNG

CHARLIE FLINT, 74, SORRENTO

His philosophy: Of aging, Charlie says he’s “fighting it all the way” and staying fit by playing pickleball regularly in Mount Dora.

“All these folks that we play with here, everybody’s pretty much just natural and trying to do the best they can to stay in shape. You know, slow down the aging process as much as you can. And it works.”

On cosmetic surgery: “The only people who do that, they’re trying to impress the mirror.”

TANYA EVANS, 32, APOPKA

Her philosophy: “I don’t want to get old,” says the Tavares bartender, but she believes people should look natural as they get older, and she would avoid surgery: “I’m not into all that.” Her plan: “Eat healthy. Work out. Exercise. Have fun. Live life.”

On people trying to look young: “I see all kinds. It doesn’t really bother me. Everyone has their own way of how they want to look.”

JULIE JORDAN, 46, TAVARES

Her philosophy: On aging gracefully or looking young: “I think it’s a mix between the two. I don’t want to get surgery or anything, but I do the training and try to keep up at least. It’s a privilege, to me, to be older. To look your best and be healthy is great, but not at any cost. I think some people who try too hard are missing out on the benefits of growing older. It’s not just all looks.”

On colorful hair: “I like individuality. It doesn’t bother me one way or another. But I wouldn’t do it when I was younger, either.”

JADYN VASQUEZ, 18, SORRENTO

Her philosophy: Advice for her older self: Diet, get more water, moisturize, go to bed earlier. Not like I’m doing right now.”

On cosmetic surgery: She says she’ll do whatever it takes to keep looking young in the future—“I don’t want to get old”—except surgery.

On colorful hair: “If you can pull it off, I think it’s fine.”

A SPOONFUL OF CHANGE

You may have glowing skin, healthy hair, strong nails, and an all-around beautiful radiance. But it hardly matters if your poor diet leaves you with little energy and keeps you feeling fatigued.

To feel good from the inside out, you’ll need to be armed with more than makeup and mascara. Many health experts agree the true secret behind looking and feeling your best comes from wholesome, nutritious food.

One of those experts is Lori Esarey, founder of Lady Lake-based Total Nutrition and Therapeutics. Lori, who specializes in nutritional and metabolic medicine, has successfully transformed the lives of many clients by teaching them how to make nutrition and lifestyle choices.

Healthy Living recently sat down with Lori and learned how nutrition plays a vital role in helping people achieve optimal health.

Q: Why is food so critically important when it comes to looking and feeling good from the inside out? If we want to look good, can’t we just go to the gym or beauty parlor or have plastic surgery?

A: Because looking good does not equate to feeling good unless you approach it from the inside out. You can have liposuction and look better, but does that really make you feel better? Most people will not have a healthy, thriving life unless they have the energy to do the things they really want to do. What’s the purpose of looking good if you’re spending much of the day in bed?

Q: So would you say nutrition is the most important

A: I like to tell people there are four major pillars to health. Nutrition is the base. It’s just like building a house. You cannot build a house on a base that is not solid. Fundamentally, the most important aspect to health is what we put in our mouth—our food. Our bodies are made up of trillions of cells. That’s what makes you a living human being. In order for those cells to function optimally, they have requirements. Those requirements are the food, energy, vitamins, minerals, and nutrients we provide those cells. Without that, our cells begin to die. It’s a slow, insidious process. The other three pillars are detox, exercise, and hormone balance.

Q: What are some suggestions for somebody who is starting a journey toward better health and nutrition?

A: When we’re coaching people to make initial steps, one of the first things we teach them is to become mindful. Sugar is one of the leading contributors to all disease states, particularly inflammation. Ninety percent of diseases we deal with in conventional medicine have a root in inflammation. The key trigger to inflammation is bloodsugar control. Therefore, one of the key initial steps is to determine how much sugar you’re taking in. Sometimes that starts with journaling without initially changing their diet. Clients will log their food for the first week and not realize how many grams of sugar they consume. That

When it comes to looking and feeling your best from the inside out, nutrition is a key ingredient.

WRITER: JAMES COMBS

mindfulness is a good first step and is key to everything we coach and teach here.

Q: Some people feel that healthy food is too expensive. What do you say to those people?

A: It’s going to cost you one way or the other. It’s all about what you want to spend it on. Look up how much open-heart surgery costs. I may be spending more on healthy food, but I’m spending less on medical copayments and doctor visits. I choose to make the investment of putting high-quality fuel in my body. I see this as an investment rather than a cost. An investment yields a return, while a cost does not. Eating at a restaurant is a cost; buying healthy food is an investment.

they do not have realistic expectations. We as a society look at weight as a marker for health. People think, “If I lose weight, I’m going to continue eating like this.” But if they don’t lose weight right out of the gate, they’re going to be disappointed and quit.

A healthier weight is a byproduct of and secondary to a healthier lifestyle. Weight loss will come naturally if you start to take steps in the right direction. Do better today than you did yesterday. And do better tomorrow than you’re doing today.

Q: I like to drink beer when I’m watching sports or socializing with friends. Will alcohol derail my quest for a healthier lifestyle?

Q: If we cannot get caught in the fat-free, sugar-free, and gluten-free craze, what should we do?

A: We have to get back to the basics, and that means eating whole foods. It may seem oversimplified, but the secret is moving back to meats, vegetables, seeds, nuts, and healthy oils.

Q: Is it OK to eat bad as long as I exercise regularly?

Q: What are some small steps I can take to substitute food and beverages I enjoy with healthier options?

A: You could replace sodas with water that has natural flavoring. Move away from the pork, bacon, salami, and sausage and replace them with lean cuts of chicken, fish, turkey, and white meat. Don’t forget to pull the skin off. If you must have red meat, choose a filet or something without so much fat. Small differences make large impacts on the body.

Q: If I make the decision to live a healthier lifestyle and improve my eating habits, should I go hardcore from the beginning?

A: Diving all in at once is a recipe for failure. Those people quit because

A: One of the key sabotages to anyone’s successful healthy living program is truly alcohol. It’s not only the sugar content found in alcohol, but you also become more impulsive and tend to eat whatever is in the refrigerator. You’re not thinking as clearly. The worst kind of alcohol has a large amount of sugar, particularly wine coolers, margaritas, and daiquiris.

Q: What is one of the biggest pitfalls you see when it comes to healthy eating?

A: People assume that, much like the fat-free craze, that gluten-free is good for you. We cannot assume gluten-free is healthier for us. They are pulling gluten out of the food but putting something else in there to give it flavor. Oftentimes, it can be tapioca food flour or modified food starch. Calorically speaking, it can sometimes contain more calories and more sugar.

A: No. Because when it comes to maintaining a healthy weight and lifestyle, 80 percent of the equation is food and 20 percent is exercise. You cannot out-exercise a bad diet. There comes a point in time where exercise is counterproductive if you’re not giving your body the right fuel to turn over energy. In fact, you may feel worse.

You cannot expect your car to drive down the road on zero fuel. You have to put the right fuel in. The same analogy applies to fueling our bodies with proper nutrition.

There are four major pillars to health. Nutrition is the base. It’s just like building a house. You cannot build a house on a base that is not solid.

Help Is Here With Lake Eye’s Dry Eye Solutions

Lake Eye offers Dry Eye Solutions, dedicated to providing relief from all causes of dry eye. It starts with a diagnosis from our Board Certified ophthalmologists, who can determine if your condition is caused by a disease such as diabetes or a thyroid disorder, certain lifestyle habits, or the most common cause, Meibomian Gland Dysfunction, or MGD, a blockage of the glands that lubricate the eye.

Lake Eye offers an array of safe, effective solutions for mild to severe intermittent and chronic dry eye conditions, including nutritional supplements, prescription eye drops and the latest MGD treatment, LipiFlow®, a breakthrough drug-free procedure that gently massages away gland obstructions, for relief and improved function that can last up to 2 years.

Why spend another day with dry, irritated eyes and blurred vision? Relief is just a phone call away.

MOVE BODY

Exercise doesn’t have to be a regimen at a gym—maybe you just

WRITER: LEIGH NEELY PHOTOS: FRED LOPEZ

Exercise is anything that elevates your heart rate and takes your body outside its comfort zone. It doesn’t have to be done in a gym or with a class. Constant movement for a set time is good, and remember, you must do it regularly.

The key is to exercise whenever you can. The recent popularity of apps and devices that count steps made people more aware of movement and the need for it. If you can get in 10,000 steps a day, you know you’re doing well.

need to move more during your busy day.

However, regularly getting up from your desk and walking around during your workday also is good for you.

Whether you’re at home or at work or doing something you enjoy, you can be burning calories. To accurately determine the number of calories you have burned, you have to use your body weight.

For example, a 130-pound person will burn 354 calories per hour swimming leisurely, while a 205-pound person will burn 558.

SPORTS CENTER

Treading water fast, 590 calories per hour; rowing, 210; softball or baseball, 352; shuffleboard, 245; lawn bowling, 136

Joe Kelly heads up a kickball league in The Villages and says playing kickball takes you back to those days in elementary school and gym class. “It’s good exercise, but it’s not continuous. You run fast, then you walk, and you may stand around awhile, but it’s fun,” Joe says. “We’re very informal and relaxed, and we’re here to have fun. We usually have 35 to 40 people and two games going.” Competition is light, and the emphasis is on fun. “This is what I did 40 or 50 years ago, and it’s fun to be doing it again now.”

LET’S DANCE

250 to 450 calories per

Linda Bitterly, of The Villages, formerly taught a beginning ballet class at The Villages Lifelong Learning College, now closed, and currently teaches two tap classes. Dancing is a wonderful way to keep your body moving without feeling restricted to an exercise program, she says.

“If you’ve never taken ballet, you need to start with a beginning ballet class. It gives you correct posture and correct movement, like bending the knees,” Linda says. “It’s a wonderful way of stretching your body and doing movement to slow music as opposed to the fast music used in aerobics.”

Ballet lessons begin with students at the barre with one hand on it.

“Eventually, you move away from the barre, and that’s when you really learn balance. You use all your joints, and you’re able to look in the mirror and see if you’re doing it correctly,” Linda says. “It’s actually good movement if you’re recovering from some orthopedic surgeries.”

Linda says the tap classes are much harder on the body. “You must have no problems with the discs in your back or in your hips or knees, because you’re pounding with the tap dancing and that’s hard on the joints.”

Marci Palmer teaches Zumba classes in Wildwood. However, the community center there is being renovated, so the class currently meets at 5:30pm Tuesdays at the Oxford Community Building.

“Zumba is a Latin-based dance fitness class, and people love to dance,” Marci says. “The music inspires the movement, and they enjoy moving to the music so much they forget they’re exercising for an hour.”

(court or beach)

Cindy Duncan, who lives in The Villages, kept receiving videos from a friend in Michigan about cardio drumming. Eventually, she was convinced it was worth a try. The first class had seven people. “Once we got into a recreation center, our biggest class was 58,” Cindy says. “You drum to the music and exercise while you’re doing it. One of my friends calls it ‘stealth exercise,’ but I really work up a sweat.” To make your drum, you need a big plastic tub with rope handles. An exercise ball is placed inside it, and you drum away the calories.

LOOK GOOD FEEL GOOD

Looking good and feeling good helps us radiate an outward glow of strength, confidence, and happiness. Numerous local businesses and healthcare professionals passes the tools and expertise to help us maximize our appearance and self-image.

III PAID PROMOTIONAL FEATURE III

RELAX AND GO WITH THE TOTAL BODY FLOW

Here is a place to find relief from stress, healing for aches and pains, and a road to good health naturally.

Total Body Flow Massage® is a method unique to Hands of Mercy Massage in Tavares. This method was developed with a holistic approach to the body, supporting all massage techniques and modalities. Every therapist at Hands of Mercy knows the method and they’re able to rely on their own intuitive process to create a massage that meets the needs of the individual client.

“We do not diagnose or prescribe for any client, but we do use science to apply the art of massage,” says owner Lavonne Ayoub. “We are a five-star facil-

offers very gentle pressure to soft tissue it provides deep relaxation and stress relief which often reduces physical pain.

The intermediate level of Total Body Flow Massage is designed to provide deep relaxation with medium pressure and elegant, gentle stretching. This is heightened by other complementary massage techniques to affect pain relief in the muscular tissue and joints which may be causing stress deeper in the body.

Deep to ultra-deep pressure is the step up to Total Body Flow Massage method 3. Building on the elements of methods one and two, there’s the added element of deeper stretching and deep tissue techniques. This method is specifically designed for those who carry pain and stress throughout their bodies and enjoy a more intense pressure during their therapy session.

One of the essential elements of Total Body Flow Massage is pain relief. Many people suffer from chronic pain, and it’s not only debilitating, it’s depressing. Unfortunately, depression increases chronic pain and creates an endless cycle.

“Total Body Flow Massage is an excellent tool for pain relief,” Lavonne says. “It also helps with pain management. As I said, we don’t prescribe or diagnose, but we will work along with your caregiver to help you get essential relief.”

Hands of Mercy Massage therapists use only pure coconut oil, unless a client requests a cream. We also offer clinical-grade essential oils. “We can batch the oils to find out if they pass or fail, so we know we’re getting a premium product.”

ity because of our unique Total Body Flow Massage® method, and we invite people to come in and experience the difference.”

There are three methods of massage in the Total Body Flow method. The first, Classic TBF Method, is for those who prefer light pressure during a massage. It combines flowing rhythmic strokes with Swedish relaxation techniques. While it

“Whatever method you choose, Total Body Flow Massage is meant to design an individualized massage that helps you reach the health goals you’re working toward,” Lavonne says. “Our bodies get compacted in life, pressed down with stress. Total Body Flow encourages the mind to settle into quiet mode so that thoughts can become calm, allowing the body to stretch, relax and unwind.”

Clients can become members of the Hands of Mercy Massage Wellness Program and receive a discounted rate for the massage they prefer. Members of the program pay monthly and can come in at their convenience to receive therapy. There are no hidden fees and no contracts, everything is paid month-to-month, and members may opt out of the program anytime with a 30-day notice.

We are a five-star facility because of Total Body Flow Massage method, and we invite people to come in and experience the difference.

— LAVONNE AYOUB

In addition to massage, Hands of Mercy Massage also owns Total Body Flow Yoga, LLC. Both companies are at the same location.

“Yoga is offered to members and clients to help with their holistic health goals. We want to encourage people in their life journey to understand who they are and to be the healthy person they want to be,” Lavonne says. “It extends the benefits of massage through active exercise. The stretching and the quieting of the mind in yoga helps create physical and mental habits for long term healthy outcomes.”

People often compartmentalize their lives, and feel fragmented, Lavonne says. They are spouses, parents, sons and daughters, employees, volunteers—all parts of the person going through a busy life every day.

“But we are simply who we are, and we only express ourselves in our different roles,” Lavonne says. “We want to bring you to a place where you have a feeling of being more at ease in the body and all those elements come together to help create a whole, healthy person.”

When your life is busy and consumed with all the roles you play, it also deeply affects your breathing. “Breathe better and you feel better about your world,” Lavonne says. “Total Body Yoga along with Total Body Flow Massage method encourages a sense of control and peace in our everyday lives.”

Lavonne says she and her staff know there’s a lot of trust involved in lying on the massage table. “It’s not intimate, but it is very personal. We honor that trust and we care about each individual. We train together and separately in the art of Total Body Flow Massage® method so that we always offer clients our very best.”

The message Lavonne has for clients is a mas-

sage at Hands of Mercy Massage is different - it’s an experience. “If you leave here more at ease in your body, then we’ve done our job.”

Hands of Mercy Massage is located at 320 Burleigh Blvd. in Tavares. For more information call 352.343.7707 or visit handsofmercymassage.com.

KEEPING ‘EM STRAIGHT

Brace yourself for a clear alternative to metal braces.

Dr. Luisa Betancur has sunk her teeth into the field of orthodontics. For her, it’s a rewarding career because she utilizes her talent to help create healthy, beautiful, and lifelong smiles. Her practice, Ford and Betancur Orthodontics, has locations in The Villages and Ocala. Both offices offer patients the best of both worlds—personable, hometown service combined with the latest advances and techniques to straighten teeth and transform smiles.

What is the difference between a general

A general dentist performs procedures such as filling cavities or teeth whitening. An orthodontist helps straighten crooked teeth or

I have crooked teeth. Why should I see an orthodontist instead of a dentist? An orthodontist has completed three extra years of dental school training to become experts in straightening and correcting your bite.

I’m a 65-year-old woman who has crooked teeth. Most people have their teeth straightened when they are children. Am I too old to see an orthodontist? Absolutely not. For many of my patients, their parents could not afford to get their teeth straightened when they were younger. As a result, they are coming to me to have their teeth straightened later in life. They soon discover that flossing is much easier with straight teeth.

Are there any alternatives to metal braces? Yes. I use a product called Invisalign, which is a clear plastic aligner that is comfortable, removable, and nearly invisible with no metal braces or wires to cause mouth abrasions. It can be used to treat almost anyone who desires straighter teeth. Patients wear a set of aligners for two weeks, removing them only to eat, drink, brush, and floss.

As a patient replaces each aligner with the next in the series, his/her teeth will move until they have straightened to the final position.

How experienced are you with Invisalign? I do hundreds of cases a year—more than anyone in the area. I’m an expert in teeth straightening and that’s why I achieve good results. We are the only top 1% provider in Invisalign in the area.

What are the advantages of having straight teeth?

It reduces decay and inflammation of gum tissue by improving the ability to brush and floss between teeth. Also, with straight teeth, you can chew and digest food much better.

What makes you so passionate about your field?

I love establishing relationships with patients and seeing their smiles transform.

For more information visit www.BetancurOrtho.com or call 352.751.3534 for The Villages office and 352.368.9099 for the Ocala Office.

FOOT FOR THOUGHT

Toe the line to better health at Relaxing Feet.

Here’s a little-known fact about our feet. Each foot has 26 bones, 19 muscles, 100 ligaments, and 7,200 nerve endings.

Yet, when we think of healthy living, rarely do we give much consideration to the health of our feet. We’re more focused on the heart, lungs, and other organs. No pun intended, but we cannot tiptoe around the importance of having healthy feet.

The team at Lady Lake-based Relaxing Feet understands that foot care plays an extremely important role in achieving overall health. The company, which is owned by Amy Haffner and Jason Huang, offers three important services designed for both relaxation and healing: Reflexology, herbal foot bath, and chair massage.

Herbal foot baths are a wonderful way to battle stress and fatigue. It’s also beneficial for those who have been on their feet all day from walking in a theme park, hiking on a trail, or working in a garden. At Relaxing Feet, clients soak their feet in a bucket of warm water filled with roses and herbal salt. Since the feet have points that correspond to many organs of the

body, herbal foot baths can unblock energy channels and activate blood throughout the body.

During reflexology treatments, clients lie in a comfortable foot massage sofa bed while soothing music quietly plays in the background. A warm, moist towel is carefully draped over a client’s face. A therapist gently applies pressure to various points on your feet and other body parts that relate to specific organs and glands in your body. The goal is to enhance the body’s energy pathways.

Tuina, or chair massage, is equally healing and relaxing. It’s a wonderful way to release tight and stiff muscles, reduce soreness, improve joint movement, and remove toxins and lactic acid.

The courteous, friendly staff at Relaxing Feet goes above and beyond to make sure each visit is a special one. And the clean, quiet, and peaceful environment will help you relax through each treatment session.

Relaxing Feet is located at 566 N. U.S. Hwy. 441 in Lady Lake at The Villages Crossroads Plaza. For more information, please call 352.775.8389.

A VOICE OF HOPE

Isaac Deas pours his heart and soul into helping others.

He provides counseling to people dealing with anger management, substance abuse, sexual abuse, and marital issues. One of his favorite aspects of his job is working with troubled youth and shaping their lives in a positive manner. Many are referred to him by the Juvenile Justice Department. To say Isaac makes an impact would be an understatement.

“In some cases, after I’ve finished counseling a child, they come back and visit just to let me know they’re doing okay. Others have convinced their friends to come to me. I have two rules: I give them respect and I want it back, and I’m not going to lie to them so I don’t want them to lie to me.”

people trust me and respect me enough to open

On the last Friday of each month, Isaac takes a group of children and teenagers on a tour of the Lake County Jail, where they interact with juveniles who are incarcerated.

Consulting LLC in 2000.

“I’m not trying to scare them,” he says. “Some of the teenagers in jail are facing 10 to 15 years in prison. It has an impact when these inmates talk to the kids about avoiding a life of crime. And seeing the inside of a jail will make them think twice about doing something bad when they’re

Isaac equally cherishes his role as interfaith chaplain of Cornerstone Hospice. He provides a listening ear to patients experiencing end-of-life issues, as well as their caregivers who often experience stress and grief.

“Caregivers no longer have a life. I educate them about taking care of themselves so they can rest and recuperate.”

He also helps patients create wills and trusts through a program called Five Wishes.

“People think of Hospice as a place to die. It’s so much more than that. We help them make sure their affairs are in order and helping their family members through the grieving process.”

Deas Consulting LLC is located at 385 W. Alfred St. in Tavares. For more information, call 352.406.1264 or visit www.deasconsulting.com.

K. WADE FOSTER, M.D. PHD ANGELO AYAR, M.D.

COMPLETE SKIN CARE, CLOSE TO HOME

Taking good care of the skin you’re in!

Healthy skin protects a healthy body. The risks of skin damage are high in Florida, where yearround sunshine means plenty of outdoor activities: fishing, golfing, tennis, gardening, walking and running all offer healthy—or potentially unhealthy— doses of sunshine and its harmful ultraviolet rays.

Helping people maintain healthy skin is key to Florida Dermatology and Skin Cancer Centers’ commitment to excellent care. To expand our services for Lake County residents, we recently opened a new office in Lady Lake, at 836 County Road 466, where we offer the same high-quality care found in our Leesburg office.

Florida Dermatology and Skin Cancer Centers treat all types of skin and scalp conditions. What sets us apart is our ability to diagnose and treat skin cancers, with highly-specialized physicians and the latest techniques. Owner and Medical Director K. Wade Foster, M.D., Ph.D., is fellowshiptrained in Mohs surgery, which is the most effective technique for most skin cancers, with minimal scarring or risk. We also provide a full-line of cosmetic services, including fillers, facial peels, and advanced hair restoration.

Dr. Angelo Ayar graduated from the University of Toledo College of Medicine and completed his residency at the University of Michigan Medical School.

A Michigan native, he also earned his undergraduate degree in biology at the University of Michigan with honors. He is a fellow of the American Board of Dermatology and the American Academy of Dermatology. Dr. Foster will share surgical responsibilities in Lake County with Angelo Ayar, M.D., and other FLDSCC physician staff as needed. Call the Lady Lake office, 352.750.4614, or the Leesburg office, 352.530.2306, for an appointment, or visit www.fldscc.com for more information about our services and specialists.

“I hate going to the gym, so sweating outdoors sure beats sitting on a stationary bike staring at my navel.”

—Tom Selleck

SHRIMP AND SPINACH SALAD

INGREDIENTS

DELICIOUS COOL SUMMER SALAD

“My favorite thing to do is teach how to cook easy, healthy, budget-friendly meals with minimal ingredients!”

Jaime Alonso

Certified Health Coach

I received my initial training and certification as a wellness coach at Spencer Institute. I continued my training as a health coach at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition’s cutting-edge health coach training program. I studied more than 100 dietary theories, practical lifestyle management techniques, and innovative coaching methods with some of the world’s top health and wellness experts. My teachers included Dr. Andrew Weil, director of the Arizona Center for Integrative Medicine; Dr. Deepak Chopra, leader in the field of mind-body medicine; Dr. David Katz, director of Yale University’s Prevention Research Center; Dr. Walter Willet, chair of nutrition at Harvard University; Geenan Roth, bestselling author and expert on emotional eating; and other leading researchers and nutrition authorities.

At Total Nutrition and Therapeutics, I help you create a “sustainable” lifestyle change. Meeting you where you are in your journey and equipping you with practical tools to grow and learn new strategies; teaching you how to shop and plan meals; helping you create new ideas; and learning how to eat out are a few of the handson lessons you receive. I teach you how to live well for life!

DIRECTIONS

1. Pile all ingredients into a bowl and add dressing (ex: balsamic vinegar)

spinachshrimp (cooked in coconut oil) avocadocherry tomatoes

sea salt and black pepper

to feel good and look good

WRITER: RICHARD T. BOSSHARDT, MD, FACS

“Looking good is the best revenge.” This has become a popular saying in some circles. I can think of several instances in magazines and the internet recently where some celebrity has been referred to as having a “revenge body.” This usually means they look great and, in some unfathomable way, this evens some score with a former boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse. On one hand, it just fuels the impression that we live in a youthobsessed, looks-obsessed culture. On the other, it speaks to our innate desire to look our best.

It is a natural and normal human desire to look good. We are a social species, and part of this is fitting in among our peers. Most people pay attention to how they dress, groom themselves, personal hygiene, and so forth just for this purpose. An integral part of this is keeping your body fit and in good shape. As a plastic surgeon, I see the ultimate expression of this desire in people who choose to undergo surgery for the purpose of looking better. It becomes a bad thing only when it leads to extremes or unrealistic expectations.

The mind/body connection is an accepted medical fact that no one really disputes. We know that our physical well-being affects how we feel emotionally. People who are fit and healthy are more likely to be happy. The reverse is true as well since our emotional state can produce real, measurable physiological effects. We know people who are sad or depressed have a higher likelihood of dying of heart disease or cancer.

On a daily basis, we are bombarded with the message that to look and feel our best we need to use this product or that; take these supplements; eat or drink this potion; use a certain deodorant, toothpaste, perfume, makeup, or skin care line; wear these clothes; drive this car, etc. Everywhere, people are searching for a magic bullet, or bullets, for looking their best. Many plastic surgeons, and other physicians who promote cosmetic procedures in their practices, are guilty of pushing the idea that looking good means getting Botox, injectable fillers, skin peels, and/ or cosmetic surgery. In all of this, I believe something has been lost.

As a physician, I am convinced that people who devote some of their time and energy to staying physically fit are not only healthier than their sedentary peers, they look better as well. Regardless of your features and natural physical gifts, or lack thereof, you will look more attractive if you are fit than if you aren’t. People who are physically fit walk, move, and carry themselves differently than those who are not. They walk with a proud carriage—head erect, shoulders back, good posture—firm core, muscled arms and legs, and a definite spring in their step. Compare that to someone who moves around stoopshouldered, back hunched, with a

doughy pot belly, thin arms and legs, and a slower gait, sometimes even a shuffle. It is not a pretty picture.

Does this imply everyone should be a ripped gym rat, marathon runner, or elite athlete of some sort? No! Relatively few people have the time, inclination, and discipline to reach elite levels in any physical activity. Everyone, however, has the same 24 hours in each day and can choose to use some of the time to get fit and stay there. It can be done in as little as an hour several days per week. Most sources recommend at least 150 minutes of moderate exercise (you

to get through our daily routines. This produced incalculable harm, including a population of people two-thirds of whom are overweight, and half of those are obese.

People who have not exercised for years are like the apocryphal frog in the pan of water on the stove. They don’t know that they don’t feel or look their best because it has happened so gradually that they no longer know what it is like to feel truly good and look truly great.

As a physician with 40 years in medicine, 28 of these as a plastic surgeon, I know when people are fit

can speak in full sentences while doing it) or 75 minutes of vigorous exercise (you can’t speak in full sentences) per week as a minimum. What you do is not as important as doing something.

There really is no excuse not to exercise. Wheelchair-bound paraplegics do it. Harried young moms with small children find time for it. Busy executives make time for exercise. One couple at a local YMCA was in their 80s. Obese, sick individuals turned their lives around by the simple act of getting off the couch and out of the fridge and taking baby steps leading to a regular exercise program.

Although progress is a wonderful thing in many ways (I am typing this on a laptop computer with more capability than NASA had when we landed a man on the moon in 1969!), it brought us to where most of us do not engage in any physical activity

and feel good, they also look good. The surest way to feel good is to be physically fit.

Regardless of your features and natural physical gifts, or lack thereof, you will look more attractive if you are fit than if you aren’t. People who are physically fit walk, move, and carry themselves differently than those who are not.

EXERCISE IN THE GREAT

Make outdoor exercise safe and effective

WRITER: SUSIE YAKOWICZ

Exercising outside during the summer months has many perks, including scenic settings, fun fitness activities, and fresh air. But when the heat and humidity kick in, outdoor workouts can also be tiring, unproductive, and even dangerous if you’re not careful. Don’t let the warm weather send you back inside. Try these seven ways to make outdoor exercise during summer safe and effective—and turn the heat into your fitness friend rather than foe.

Choose activities that embrace nature

Part of the draw of exercising outside in summer is the chance to

enjoy nature while you’re getting a workout. Find activities that allow you to revel in the beauty of the great outdoors: a hike surrounded by the sights and sounds of woodland animals or yoga practice against the setting sun. Embracing nature while you exercise can inspire you and boost your workout.

Dress for the weather

Don’t be too quick to leave the house wearing your usual exercise garb. If it’s warm and humid, don clothing to repel the heat. Cotton and other materials specifically designed to absorb sweat are good choices. So is light-colored clothing, which helps reflect heat, and lightweight, loose-

fitting tops and bottoms allow drier air to pass along the skin.

Exercise at the right time of day

Late morning to late afternoon tends to be the hottest time of the day. If possible, schedule your daily exercise in the early morning or evening, when the weather is cooler and less humid. You’ll not only feel more comfortable during exercise, you’ll have more strength and endurance for a full and effective workout.

Hydrate often

Staying hydrated during exercise boosts your workout by keeping you energized and your joints and

muscles loose. But hydration is especially necessary when you work out in the heat because you can become dehydrated more quickly, which can lead to cramps, fatigue, or heat stroke. Drink water before, during, and after outdoor exercise, even if you aren’t thirsty.

Monitor sun exposure

Exercising in the sun can put your skin at risk and cause overheating and even sunstroke, but that doesn’t mean you have to avoid the sun altogether. A key source of vitamin D, the sun can be health-promoting in small doses. Monitor your time exercising in the sun and protect yourself from overexposure by

wearing sunscreen and a hat, or moving your workout to the shade.

Listen to your body

Always pay attention to how you feel when you exercise. Outdoor exercise, especially on a hot day, can be exhausting. Slow down your pace or take a break if you begin to feel dizzy, nauseous, or crampy. If your level of intensity feels good and invigorates you, keep at it. Your body has a way of telling you what’s working and what’s not—listen and heed its signals.

End with a satisfying cool-down

There are many ways to cool down when you’re exercising outdoors, but

the first step is to simply slow down. Take your jog to a leisurely stroll or your vigorous bike ride to an easy pedal. Once your body is closer to its resting state, treat yourself to a satisfying cool-down, like a refreshing dip in the pool or a relaxing stretching session under a shady tree.

Don’t think you can’t get a good outdoor workout during the hot summer months. Follow the above tips and enjoy a productive fitness session amid the warm summer breezes.

“There’s a terrible price to pay for stress in your life, it really takes a hit on your heart.”

—Leeza Gibbons

WAYS TO INCREASE YOUR RESISTANCE TO STRESS

Put yourself in charge of resisting the effects of stress.

People respond differently to stressful situations. For some, stress impedes performance, reduces well-being, and triggers other physical and mental problems. For others, the experience of stress can be minimal, or even positive, improving their focus. If you’re in the first group of people, don’t worry—resilience to stress can be developed. Here are seven ways you can learn to keep a cool head under pressure.

Problem-focused solutions

Problem-focused coping strategies are unique to the particular stressor you are facing. For example, if an upcoming exam is causing some worry, learn timemanagement strategies or memory techniques. Think about the cause of your stress, brainstorm ways to reduce it, and put your best three ideas into practice.

Mindfulness meditation

Meditation has been shown in numerous research studies to reduce stress. In fact, continued practice actually causes the brain areas associated with the stress response to shrink. Start with 20 minutes of practice per day, and find guided mindfulness meditations on YouTube or with an app like Calm or Headspace.

Physical exercise

Exercise has a huge impact on mental health, primarily by increasing levels of the neurotransmitters in the brain associated with positive mood. Exercise also improves cognitive functions like learning and memory, putting you in a mental state much better suited to dealing with problems.

Sleep

Sleep researchers have established a strong link between positive mental health and a good night’s rest. To improve your sleep, start winding down at least an hour before bed. Turn the lighting down and don’t look at screens with a backlight. This is a good time to do your daily meditation practice. Keep your bedroom fairly cool, don’t eat large meals in the evening, and avoid caffeine after 2pm.

Connect

We are social creatures, and contact with other humans is essential to our well-being. Even in high-security prisons, where the most violent and dangerous offenders are sent, the supreme punishment is solitary confinement. Make an effort to spend time with your friends, family, colleagues, and any other other positive, supportive people you know. Don’t wait for them to contact you.

Spend time in nature

Psychologists have known the positive impact of nature on mental health since the 1980s. This research is summarized by the “Attention Restoration Theory,” which states the natural environment allows the brain to rest and recharge. Take time regularly to get out of the urban environment and into nature. Find a park or hiking trail, or head to the coast if you can.

Eat well

Food can influence how you feel. In fact, the gastrointestinal system contains 100 million neurons that detect and respond to your gut bacteria, passing the information to the brain. To positively impact your gut bacteria, eat a diet high in vegetables and low in processed food, and minimize caffeine and alcohol consumption. If you eat dairy, use probiotics—studies have demonstrated significant improvements in mood after introducing probiotics to diets.

If you want resilience to stress, it’s important to use these methods regularly, even when nothing is stressing you out.

Make them a routine, and when difficult problems come around, you’ll be stronger and better placed to deal with them.

BORN TO RUN

Put your best foot forward and take a simple step to reduce anxiety.

Millions of people suffer from generalized anxiety disorder, or GAD. For people with GAD, even a simple task like grocery shopping can be stressful. You never know when unwarranted and uncontrollable fear will surface. Social events can be overwhelming, and many people would rather just stay home. For most of us, avoiding the world is not an option. Prescription medications are not right for everyone, and these days people are searching for a more natural treatment.

Studies show that running can limit the number of symptoms GAD sufferers experience. Running is a sport that most people can try because you start at your individual skill level. In fact, it is not uncommon for newbies to start out walking with short bursts of intermittent running. Another reason this sport is accessible to most people is the low cost. You only need sneakers and a willingness to give it a try.

Here are some benefits you get from running:

It takes your mind off your worries.

When you go for a run, your focus is on your stride, speed, and breath. You can easily get lost in the moment, and that is excellent for people drowning in worry. If you need a fast way to get out of your head, lace up your sneakers and get going.

Running also releases feel-good chemicals like neurotransmitters, endorphins, and endocannabinoids.

Nothing says happy like a fresh batch of endorphins coursing through your system. The short-term benefits of this chemical release is a happier disposition and more energy throughout the day. This natural high is often referred to as a “runner’s high,” and people dealing with anxiety are no different. They feel the effect like everyone else.

Running changes your body’s response to anxiety.

If you go for a run every time worry starts creeping in, you begin to modify your brain’s responds to stress. Over time, the mere thought of going for a run brings a smile to your face.

Running also builds confidence and self-esteem.

Your inner strength increases alongside your physical strength. With more confidence, it’s be easier to try new things and meet new people. You may even decide to enter fun runs and races, which puts you in the path of like-minded people who also enjoy running.

If you’re looking for a natural way to treat anxiety, give running a try. If after a few weeks you haven’t noticed a change, you’ll at least see improvements in your health. If, like so many GAD sufferers, you see improvements, it will be easy to continue. Start running today and take back your life.

A SUITE PLACE FOR independent living

In and around The Villages, a basic 400-square-foot apartment in a assisted living facility can start at $36,000 per year. Even those who have adequately planned for retirement may find this expense unbearable.

Fortunately, there is another option being offered by Hometown Builders, a local Certified General Contractor based in Wildwood.

Multigenerational is the term used to describe these specialized living spaces that can accommodate your mom or dad, your son or daughter who’s just getting started in life, or just old friends and neighbors from back home that love to visit any time of the year. Its living area that is close enough for you to check in on your loved one with ease but private enough where everyone enjoys their own space.

Lisa Malloy Designer Elisa Adams-Rae Certified General Contractor

LET US MAKE YOUR SHOWER BEAUTIFUL AND SAFE.

Has your current shower seen better days? Have you been exploring the possibility of a shower replacement? If so, don’t put yourself through the hassle of hiring different tradesmen to complete such a project. The Floor Shoppe is your one-stop shop for your shower replacement. In fact, we can help you with everything from demolition, waterproofing, and ceramic tile installation to plumbing fixtures, grab bars, and frameless glass doors.

There’s even greater news! A typical job from start to finish can be completed in as little as five days. We pride ourselves on getting the job done right and on time no matter the size or configuration of your shower. Because we take a customer-oriented approach to all shower replacement projects, we feel it is important to listen to and address all your concerns and needs.

The Floor Shoppe has been the leader in quality flooring sales and installations for more than 35 years. We’ve also been working with The Villages new construction division for 25 years and recently completed our 10,000th home.

Please visit our inspirational showroom at 9815 U.S. Hwy. 301 in the Wildwood Oaks Business Center.

Quality and style in as little as five days.

“The best way of removing negativity is to laugh and be joyous.”

—David Icke

DUMPING NEGATIVITY

How recognizing negativity bias improves relationships.

WRITER: BRIDGET WEBBER

Are you aware you have a negativity bias? It’s not your fault. In fact, everyone has it whether they like it or not. Humans are born with a predisposition to notice and emphasize negativity. Doing so is part of survival. However, your negativity bias can spoil your relationship if you don’t recognize it exists.

What is negativity bias?

Negativity bias means you respond more readily to negativity than positivity. If a dinosaur walked in on your ancestor’s picnic, they needed to react to his presence fast. Instead of

packing up lunch, they had to flee. In such a situation, focusing on danger, instead of the food in front of them, was normal and healthy.

Negativity bias enters relationships when people get locked into fight or flight. Having looked at their interactions with their partner and discovered negativity, they become vigilant. They sense danger and create a mission to seek out more problems as soon as they appear. They focus on negative aspects of the relationship and fail to notice positivity.

Negative memories are easier to reach than positive ones. You might

need to retrieve them quickly in an emergency to help you decide how to act. As such, relationships are often judged as being hopeless when they have merit. Thus, remembering an argument with your spouse, but forgetting when he or she did something special for you, you may imagine your relationship is bad.

The more you seek negativity, the more you find. You get tunnel vision and look for those times when your partner is inconsiderate. Also, the part of your brain that notices kindness weakens when your negativity bias is strong.

Heal your relationship

Understanding you’ve sought faults and forgotten positivity provides insight. Now, you can move forward with greater awareness about the situation. Ensuring you emphasize happy times and playing down negativity changes your bias. If your leg muscles were weak and you want them stronger, you use them more. The same goes if you want to improve your relationship. You need to strengthen the neural connections in your brain supporting positivity by focusing on what you enjoy, not what you dislike.

Bring mindfulness into your relationship

Being mindful in your relationship means you notice what’s happening and your reaction. If you feel defensive, or find yourself looking for problems, you can back down. Realizing your intention to heal rifts and focus on positivity helps prevent emotional injuries.

Instead of reacting hastily to negativity, mentally step back and witness the event. Observe what’s happening in a detached way. When you pause and watch what’s occurring, your innate wisdom will come into play. You can tap into your higher self

and act with love, speaking from your heart rather than a sense of injustice. Knowing about negativity bias helps you see why your partner seems difficult at times. You can identify others locked in fight or flight, too, and understand them better. Just mentally step back, witness the situation, and observe with your heart. Your compassion will grow, and you’ll remember not to place criticism or rejection in your memory bank to revisit. You can teach your partner what you know so you are understood better as well. Focusing on positivity provides new, happier recollections and helps heal your relationship.

MAKE EMPATHY YOUR GOAL

The ability to empathize wasn’t handed out equally. While some people overflow with kindness, others don’t share their caring attitude. Discovering why can help you increase empathy and be a kinder person.

Empathic people mirror others

The part of the brain managing empathy also manages what it’s like to step into another’s shoes. If you imagine what it’s like to be another person and experience what they are, you’ll feel empathy for them. Most people don’t extend compassion past their immediate social circle. They experience indifference when it comes to strangers. They don’t identify with them because they know little about them.

If you want to have more empathy, consider how those outside your circuit might feel. Find out more about people and how situations and events influence them. You’ll understand them better, and feelings of empathy will stir.

People with empathy don’t dull their pain

If you dull your pain with paracetamol or alcohol, you become less sensitive to the pain of others. The area of your brain managing empathy needs to be switched on rather than clouded. Many pain-relieving drugs don’t just turn off discomfort; they also turn down kindness. Thus, steer clear of substances that reduce your brainpower.

You can increase empathy by listening

Listening well is a skill, enabling you to discover more about people. The more you know about others, the greater the chance of empathizing with them. People with little empathy tend to be

bad listeners. Even when they seem to be paying attention, they don’t really listen.

To gain more empathy, work on your listening skills. Get used to pausing a moment after others speak, to make sure they’ve finished. Doing so also gives you time to absorb the information you hear. If you aren’t confident you understand, ask for clarification, or paraphrase, repeating back what you discern. People will tell you if you’ve misunderstood them.

Empathy is linked with imagination

When you’re empathic, you use your imagination to delve into the emotions of others. You enter their world using images, logic, and feelings. You also use your imagination in a similar way when you read or watch stories about other people’s lives. If you get engrossed in a sensitive movie, your empathy grows. Likewise, immerse yourself in quality fiction, and your ability to empathize will expand.

Empathy and mindfulness go together

Good empathizers are mindful. They are excellent at focusing on one task, movement, or thought at a time. As a result, they experience what’s happening with greater awareness than other people. You might have more empathy if you practice mindfulness, too. Fill your mind with whatever’s going on in the moment. Doing so means you don’t flit back and forth to different subjects or time frames. Stay in the moment, and you’ll be better equipped to resonate with the plight of others.

You can improve your ability to empathize with people by stepping into their shoes and refraining from dulling your brain. Increase your listening skills, and use your imagination to experience what it might be like to be someone else. Plus, mindfulness helps you focus and expands your awareness of feelings.

Osprey Lodge’s trademark Heart f elt CONNECTIONS memory care program focuses on the unique abilities that remain to each resident, both cognitive and physical. Residents are assessed and life histories are recorded that allow us to see each person for the individual he or she is. We get to know each person we have the privilege of caring for. We understand who they are now; more importantly, we learn about their lives before memory loss brought them to our doors. With detailed knowledge of our residents at our fingertips and in our hearts, we develop truly personalized care plans, incorporating favorite hobbies and pastimes into activities, and favorite foods into menus. Our caring staff, who have received specialized training in memory care, make each resident’s life as meaningful, fulfilling and joyful as possible!

Heart felt CONNECTIONS

For those seniors and their families living with a memory impairing disease.

“It’s all about understanding and treasuring what remains as far more important than what is lost, and celebrating life in and of itself.”

— Pat Spence, Life Care Services

Our Caregivers Support Group, sponsored by The Alzheimer’s Family Organization, meets the second Tuesday of every month at 6pm. Open to all, it’s a safe place for family caregivers to talk and learn with others in the same situation. For details, or for more information about our Heart felt CONNECTIONS memory care program, please call or visit Osprey Lodge. Ask for Ruth Cantillon, director of sales & community relations.

Alana Kidd, Activities Director & Memory Care Specialist

Maureen Murphy, R.N., Director of Memory Care

“Beware of little expenses. A small leak will sink a great ship.”

—Benjamin Franklin

7

DEADLY FINANCIAL SINS

These seven sins aren’t fatal, but they will leave you broke.

WRITER: B.E. CONRAD

Study after study has shown that a large percentage of people would not be able to handle an unexpected $500 expense. Given those dire circumstances, it should come as no surprise that most workers are woefully underprepared for retirement.

While stagnant incomes and the rising cost of living certainly have a role to play, in many cases, it is the things we do every day that put us behind financially. These things in particular, seven deadly financial sins if you will, can stop your financial progress cold and leave you broke. They might not get you sent to hell, but they could send you to the poorhouse.

ENVY - Keeping up with the Joneses might make you feel superior today, but those feelings of envy leave you broke and miserable in the long run.

FEAR - When it comes to saving and investing, playing it safe can actually cost you money. Fear of loss causes you to invest your savings in low-yield instruments, and in the end, you won’t even keep up with inflation.

SLOTH - It’s easy to put things off, but that laziness can cost you big time.

GREED - The “I want it now” mentality can be deadly to your finances and your future. It might feel good to buy the latest gadget or doodad, but having a solid financial nest egg feels even better.

PRIDE - Many DIY investors are either too proud to ask for help or too stubborn to

admit they made a mistake. As a result, they let their losing investments run, failing to make the changes that could beef up their portfolios and build a nest egg for the future.

LUST - From smoking and drinking to gambling and overeating, lustful habits sap your finances and leave you wondering where your hard-earned paychecks went. Something as simple as quitting smoking can give you thousands of extra investible dollars every year, and stopping other expensive and unhealthy habits helps even more.

SORROW - Falling victim to any of the first six deadly financial sins could leave you despondent and filled with regret, feeling helpless and frozen in place. Falling victim to despondency and regret means you never get started on your savings plan, dooming you to a retirement filled with want and fear.

These seven deadly financial sins are everywhere, but you do not have to fall victim to them. Once you know what not to do, develop an effective plan for retirement. It takes a lot of hard work, sacrifice, and dedication to put a savings plan together, but you will be glad you did.

CHEAP! CHEAP! EAT WELL WHILE TRAVELING

Cafés and restaurants cost more than taking your own food when traveling.

Money can drain away in no time when you’re away from home, especially when it comes to feeding yourself. Even a cafe or takeout food bar can swallow up your spending money if you’re not careful. But there’s a simple solution: provide your own food instead. Here are some tips for eating well and cheaply while out and about, whether you’re going around town or the world.

TAKE YOUR OWN FOOD

The cheapest way to eat while away from home is to prepare your own food. You’ll need a variety for a balanced diet, preferably including proteins, vitamins, and fiber, and some airtight bags or boxes for storage. Nuts and dried fruits make handy travel snacks, being nutritious, durable, and light. Cooked rice, pasta, or noodles with vegetables will also last well in a sealed container and can be heated up on a camping stove or in a hostel microwave. Sliced bread will complement all sorts of foods, such as hardboiled eggs, individual cheese portions, and salads. Add in a few snack packs and bars for energy boosts, and a fork or spoon.

TAKE DRINK ACCESSORIES

If you’re going away for more than a couple of days, invest in an insulated flask and fill it with a hot drink. Pack extra tea, coffee, cocoa, or soup sachets and replenish your hot water supply in your overnight accommodation or at a cafe. A plastic bottle of cold tap water is advisable, too.

DINE IN STYLE

You don’t have to sit at a restaurant table to eat in style. Find a pleasant view with a comfortable place to sit—a tree stump in the park might serve nicely. Fresh air and natural surroundings make a great setting for a meal. If the weather’s cold or wet, just head for a covered area, such as a shopping mall, and seek out the warmest, driest seat.

PLAN YOUR HOT MEALS

If you’re staying away overnight or longer, make arrangements for a low-cost hot meal. A hostel will

provide cooking facilities and a campsite, or open ground accommodates a portable gas stove. If you have a friend or relative in the area, call in for a chat. They’ll be glad to offer you the use of their kitchen. However, if you’re stuck for cooking facilities, go ahead with that tempting cafe meal rather than go without hot food all day. But check the prices and deals before you buy; there could be a highvalue dish available that will keep you going all day.

MAKE THE MOST OF CAFE FACILITIES

Everyone needs some creature comforts from time to time, and a cuppa or snack in a cafe won't bust your budget. Sit back and make the most of the facilities. Ask for a jug of hot water to refill your cup or flask. If you can’t eat all your food, ask for a doggy bag for the leftovers. Use the internet and restroom facilities, warm yourself through and dry out any wet clothing before you leave.

SHARE RESOURCES

If you’re staying in a hostel or other shared accommodation, offer some food swaps with fellow travelers. This way, you’ll get a richer plateful and maybe some new friends as well.

However tight your travel budget, you can always eat well with a little planning. Just think “money” before “menu,” and you’ll be fine.

MONTVERDE ACADEMY

at Bella Collina

TITLE SPONSOR

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Written by Arthur M. Sharkey, M.D.

Diagnosis

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Dr. Arthur M. Sharkey is

LIVING IN THE MOMENT

face, kissed me passionately, and said, “Yes, I am dead, but you must go on. You have to live, laugh, and love again.”

The dream occurred two years ago when I was in the midst of grief, yet it was a lovely dream that gave me a sense of comfort. Imagine my goosebumps when I walked into the living room and found one of our wall hangings had fallen and was on the floor—the one with the words: live, laugh, love.

The dream has served as a catalyst in my life to live joyfully in the moment, because widowhood has taught me there is no promise of tomorrow.

In addition to loving my job and the Florida sunshine, I’m focusing on gratitude and cherishing simple moments of time: lunch outings with colleagues, evening swims, and seeing movies with two special single gals in my life, my mother and stepmom. Moreover, I’ve hopped more planes in the past year to visit my daughters in Texas and California, along with seeing relatives and my “Mr. Wonderful” back home in Indiana.

Neither of us wants a commitment at this stage in our lives, but it has been sweet to reconnect with a man I’ve known since childhood. He’s a widower, devoted grandfather of seven, and I enjoy hearing about his day via

phone calls and texts, and it means a lot to both of us that we can talk about our spouses in heaven without jealousy.

The long distance of being 1,025 miles apart has made us open in sharing our thoughts and to value the simple things most couples take for granted, such as the warm feeling of holding each other’s hand.

It was on Facebook where I first noticed the common bond we shared was being widowed, and we found it comforting to be able to reminisce. Soon after, I had a dream of meeting him for coffee and conversation. We made it happen.

So, just as my late husband wanted me to do, I am moving on in life. Living in the moment. Taking it one day

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