55+ Life Fall 2022

I love having the opportunity to be part of such a vibrant, alive, diverse and friendly community –full of gifted and intelligent people.

Tina G. (Resident since July 2011) retire from the life you love. Mid-Hudson Valley’s only delicious the garden your mind Woodland should ever need them—with

Choose a Medicare plan with real advantages.

Chase away the chilly weather with this hearty, nutritious and delicious fall soup. It’s a great warmer-upper that makes for tasty, easy-to-heat leftovers. simply healthy from your Hannaford Dietitians

We’re committed to supporting your health and wellness goals. Our team of registered dietitians offer free nutritional services online and in-store.

Visit hannaford.com/dietitians to learn more.

Creamy Sweet Potato Hommus Soup

SERVES 4 Ingredients:

2 Tbsp. Olive oil

1 medium Yellow onion, chopped 2 Garlic cloves, minced cups Vegetable stock

3 medium Sweet potatoes, peeled and chopped into 1-inch cubes

2 tsp. McCormick® Ground Cumin

1 1/4 cups Cedar’s® Hommus, Original 1/2 tsp. Salt

Optional garnish: Sliced Avocados from Mexico and/or Stonyfield® Organic 0% Fat Plain Greek Yogurt

Directions:

1. In large pot, add olive oil over medium heat.

2. Add onions and let cook for about 5 minutes, or until translucent. Add garlic and cook for another minute, until fragrant.

3. Add vegetable stock, sweet potatoes and cumin and briefly bring to a boil.

4. Reduce heat to simmer and cook for 30 to 45 minutes, or until sweet potatoes are tender.

5. Stir in hommus and remove from heat. Use an immersion blender to puree soup until smooth and creamy (or transfer soup to a regular blender to puree). Season with salt and top with optional garnish. Enjoy!

Nutritional Information: (optional ingredients not included)

Amount per serving: Calories 341; Total Fat 14 g; Saturated Fat 2 g; Carbohydrate 47 g; Sodium 713 mg; Protein 9 g

Photo: iStockphoto.com/ljubaphoto.

Robotic Knee Replacement

BY ROBERT E. O’LEARY, M.D.

In the field of orthopedic surgery, knee replacement is one of the most commonly performed procedures in the world.

It remains a highly successful operation for the treatment of severe knee arthritis and various other conditions. For the right patients, knee replacement helps to relieve pain, restore function, and provide patients the quality of life they deserve.

In the history of knee replacement surgery, modern tech niques and implant designs evolved rapidly during the 1970s and 80s. Traditional methods have helped achieve excellent patient outcomes and affected countless lives around the world.

How have we evolved in the last 50 years? The emergence of new technology in the last decade has helped to introduce the era of robotic- and computer-assisted knee replacement surgery. Further research is needed to understand the longterm benefits of these new technologies; however, our goals are to provide patients with a quicker recovery, less pain af ter surgery, and a longer lifespan of their new knee.

Patients have many questions about robotic knee replace ment surgery and how it will affect their treatment. If your surgeon has indicated that you are a candidate for tradition al knee replacement, then robotic knee replacement is most likely an option for you. After consultation, your surgeon will obtain specialized imaging of your knee, typically a CT

scan or X-rays. A virtual 3D model of your knee is created to allow for measurement and sizing of your new knee re placement.

During the operation your surgeon will place specialized computer sensors around the knee joint in order to measure the motion of your knee and the function of your ligaments. A robotic-arm device will then help your surgeon to accu rately reconstruct the knee joint in preparation for the new implants. Importantly, your surgeon is still in control!

Improvements in surgical and anesthesia techniques have allowed patients to regain function rapidly after surgery. Pa tients can expect a shorter hospital stay, or often to return home the same day after knee replacement. Many robotic knee replacement surgeries take place outside of hospitals in specialized ambulatory surgery centers.

It is important to talk with your surgeon about a person alized treatment plan, and to establish an understanding of your previous treatments and goals for activity after surgery. Always consult with your surgeon about the risks of surgery, alternative treatment options, and expected recovery after knee replacement.

Dr. O’Leary sees patients in Albany, Malta, and Saratoga Springs. For more information or to schedule an appointment, contact The Bone & Joint Center at (518) 489-2666.

Surgery of the future, or here today?

ALISON MICHAEL alison@55pluslifemage.com

Magico…

This past summer my family and I took our long-awaited trip to Italy, a trip that would forever become engraved in my heart and mind as one of the best trips of my life. My husband and I traveled with our teenage son and his grandparents, my in-laws, for a 10-day vacation to a hidden gem on the coast of Tuscany.

From Rome we traveled to Campiglia Marittima, a medieval village located on the Tuscan coast. It is a place where time stands still, entrenched in history and Italian culture. From the moment we arrived to the day we left this magical place, we soaked up the beautiful landscape and sea, the delicious food and wine, and the ancient history prevalent through out Europe.

and reading about the places we explored in Italy (page 39), and leave with a piqued curiosity about why this one should be on your bucket list.

Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

— Franklin P Jones

As I am on this 55+ life journey with you, I like to share some of my experiences. I hope you enjoy seeing our photos

Our feature stories this issue look at relationships, love, and sex. Yup, we went there—in an effort to open up dia logue about topics that often feel taboo. We explore ways to keep your relationship fresh as we age (page 26), the challenges that can come with sex and intimacy after 50 (page 16), and how to navigate the world of dat ing, should you find yourself in that new chapter (page 22). Most of us probably cringe when we think about dating in this age of technology. How did we all survive without cellphones and online dating apps? It’s a whole new—somewhat over whelming and intimidating—dating world out there. It’s safe to say that many things change as we age, but love is some thing that never goes out of style.



Chris, Alison and Luke Michael in Campiglia Marittima, an off-the-beaten-path destination in the Italian region of Tuscany.

If you’ve seen Annie Hall, you likely remember this scene. Their relationship has hit a speed bump, and Woody Allen and Annie (played by Diane Keaton) are each seeing therapists. At one point, their respective therapists ask if they are having sex. Allen’s response? “Hardly ever. Maybe three times a week.” Annie’s re sponse? “Constantly. Maybe three times a week.”

It’s a funny scene and one that likely had many a couple simultaneously laughing while also internally cringing just a little at the truth. We all fall in love in our younger years and jump into bed assuming we will magically have the BEST SEX EVER ALL THE TIME. Oh, and we expect—thank

you, media and books and social media—that this kind of sex will remain that way forever.

Fast forward to life post-50. After years of working and raising kids and managing all the things, many of us increas ingly fantasize about sleep more than sex. Add to that chang ing bodies—hello, menopause, physical ailments, libido changes—and sex and intimacy can suddenly become a topic about as popular as money or dying. Rather than a place of connection, the bedroom can become a place to avoid or, at worst, a place of friction.

The good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way. The key, experts says, is recognizing that, just like our bodies, our

BY JANET REYNOLDS

What you need to know to navigate this new phase of intimacy SEX

Photo:

sexual desires and needs evolve as we age. Reaching out to a partner and openly discussing these changes can lead to more satisfaction, closeness and overall happiness.

“Couples say they want it to be like it was when they first met,” says Dr. Bridget Finn, founder and owner of Capital Region Center for Sexual Health. “There’s nothing like when you first met. And when you think that way, you might miss the possibility of something even greater.”

When we’re young, everything is new with our partner. “People think that was the easy time and yes it was, but you were trying to attract somebody, investing time and atten tion,” Finn adds. “When we go into maintenance and phys iology is not on our side, that’s when we need to start rede fining.”

“The aging issue is multifaceted,” says Terri St. George, a psychotherapist and certified sex therapist working with pa tients in the Capital Region. “It feels like overnight you have a new body. Sometimes you look at your hands and don’t even recognize them.”

Accepting this new body can be hard, especially if you have an assumption—thank you, society—that an older body is not as sexy or alluring as that 20- or 30-something body you once had. “There can be a lot of grief and letting go is that first step,” she says.

“The second part is to figure out the new normal,” St.

The first step is deciding that we want to be that couple that gets this into a better spot. Then the how will come on the steps to take for support and accountability.”

George says. “Identify the things you can change and treat, and the things you have to accept. The new normal is work ing with what you’ve got.”

The physical changes associated with aging for both men and women are real. Menopause brings about lowered es trogen, which in turn can create vaginal dryness, a leading cause of pain during intercourse, as well as lowered libidos. For men, getting and maintaining an erection can become more difficult. Other health issues, such as heart problems, diabetes and medications, can also impact people’s physical abilities in the bedroom or exacerbate their difficulties.

But workarounds and options do exist. Creams can help with dryness while pills can help with erections. More im portant, say Finn and St. George, is having conversations about what’s going on. The clitoral manipulation that once sent your 20-something lady skyrocketing to orgasm may now simply aggravate her vulva. Your man, meanwhile, may need a different kind of stimulation to maintain his erec tion, no matter what pill he is or isn’t taking. Assuming what worked in your 20s and 30s will work now in your later years is one way to potentially ensure frustration all around.

“Erections may not be as reliable and penises may not function as they used to. That’s a difficult change for men even if it’s normal,” says St. George, noting that penises need good blood flow and nerve function to operate maximally.

—Dr. Bridget Finn, founder and owner of Capital Region Center for Sexual Health

Getting older is an opportunity for us to have deeper conversations, to grow in deeper levels of intimacy and connection. It’s the benefit of a longterm relationship—you can understand you don’t know all there is to know about this person.”

—Terri St. George, a psychotherapist and certified sex therapist

Photo courtesy Terri St. George.

Photo courtesy Dr. Bridget Finn.

“There can be a lot of emotions associated with a penis that doesn’t “work” as well as it once did.”

“Some women experience some dryness, some sexual pain and some have difficulties with desire and arousal,” says St. George. “Libido might be problematic. You can talk to your doctor about vaginal dryness. What is my new normal and what can I change?”

Differences in desire is another potential minefield as peo ple age. “Desire is a complicated mixture,” she adds, noting that desire and libido are not just hormonal. “We can cul tivate desire in our heads.” And if desire is at least partially mental, people can take steps to reimagine and re-create de sire, St. George says, adding that “it is a valid route to say ‘I’m not interested anymore.’”

The key to navigating the new normal, both therapists say, is conversation. “The challenge is that couples may go through intimacy together with no issues and no practice talking about it,” says Finn, “so the communication maybe hasn’t been there because there have been no challenges. But now you need to talk more. What do I need now? What would feel good to me physically now? If the communication wasn’t robust through the relationship, it can feel awkward.”

Finn and St. George both advise rethinking intimacy. “Couples need to redefine as they go through life how they define successful intimacy. If you’re still defining it with a rock-hard penis and a vulva ready to go at a moment’s notice, you’ll be continually disappointed,” says Finn.

Step one, suggests Finn, is moving beyond only measuring sex by performance. “Couples need to expand their idea of successful intimacy,” she says, noting that thinking beyond the act of intercourse is critical.

“You have the power to create the intimacy you want be cause it comes from within. Couples who make it a priority, who decide that being a couple who enjoys intimacy over their lifespan together, can try to culminate in something very good. We have to let go of what we think it was 25 years ago. If we don’t do that, we’re missing what’s possible.”

Finn and St. George both know this can be challenging. Many people aren’t comfortable asking for what they want in or out of the bedroom. But the potential rewards are worth it.

“People don’t know how to talk about sex. You can be to gether forever, you can feel like you’re close in every way, but still don’t know how to talk about sex,” says St. George.

“We have to be able to communicate to adapt. We can’t envision that this process will involve change in ourselves and our patterns. We gain weight, our bodies change. We will all lose our physical youth and attractiveness. We could say we’re just not going to have sex, but that’s so limiting—sex based on hot bodies.”

Real change, Finn suggests, begins with each individual in the relationship. “Keeping it fresh means keeping yourself fresh,” Finn says. “Take care of your mind, body, and spir it. Feel good about your own body. Know what makes you excited and turned on and then show up and share it. It all starts with you.

Photo:

“If you have two people who aren’t growing and expanding in their lives, you’re going to have two stale people trying to

come together to have something fresh. It doesn’t work that way,” she adds. “We don’t live in a culture that encourages conversation or even permission for pleasure. Make sure you know you’re worthy of pleasure.” n

A few discoveries from a recent AARP-sponsored National Poll on Healthy Aging:

72% of people between 65 and 80 have a romantic partner and of those 54% are sexually active.

Close to two-thirds of those 65 to 80 say they’re still interested in sex whether or not they are sexually active.

Women were less likely than men to be sexually active — 31% overall, compared with 51% of men — but were more likely to be extremely or very satisfied with their sex lives.

SOURCE: https://www.aarp.org/health/healthy-living/info-2018/sex-after-50-survey-results.html

One in three 50-somethings is having sex at least once a week.

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Finding Your MATCH

A look at the world of dating after 50

BY CARI SCRIBNER

Back in the day, if you were single and ready to min gle, the advice was to casually look around the grocery store, the gym, your church or the library. Fast-for ward to today, when everyone is rushing and/or wearing headphones, and reading books on Kindle, and meeting someone IRL (that’s “in real life” for those who are not up on their texting lingo) can seem as elusive as getting that date to the prom in high school.

All is not lost, however. Singles of all ages are looking for love in all the right places, and the dating pool is large, espe cially if you’re willing to dip your toe into the pool of dating 21st century-style.

According to an AARP survey, 56% of grandparents are either in the dating game or open to the idea. What they are seeking, however, depends on gender. A full 45% of female grandparents are looking for companionship, versus 25% of

men. And 17% of grandmas want a partner, as compared to 30% of grandpas.

Knowing what you’re looking for is critical to dating in general, no matter your age, but it’s especially important if you’re going to try dating online. Online dating apps allow members to create profiles with photos and a narrative. They can then scroll through other singles nearby. They swipe right to indicate interest, while a left swipe is a no thanks. If you both swipe right, it’s a “match” and it’s time to begin the virtual introduction to see if they’re interested in talking to you and maybe, eventually, meeting in person.

While the process can seem cold and impersonal to people used to meeting at places or events, the virtual meeting room, if you will, can help eliminate the wheat from the chaff, so to speak. Courtney Rubin of East Greenbush used the dating app Bumble to try to meet new people, and was matched

ONLINE DATING GLOSSARY

• Catfishing: luring someone in with a photo that’s 10 years old, or worse, not you at all. Yes, it happens.

• Hatfishing: when someone wears a hat in all their photos, usually to hide their lack of hair

• LTR: long-term relationship

• BAE: when someone chooses you before anyone else.

• Ghosting: after exchanging a few messages or even going out, your date disappears without warning

• Mosting: when your date makes you feel like the most incredible person in the world…then ghosts you

• Submarining: your date disappears, only to resurface and say nothing about their absence

• Swipe Right: indicates you are interested in someone’s online profile

• Swipe Left: indicates no interest. Next.

with the man who became her future husband, Bob Maggio. “I got really good at swiping left before we met,” Rubin says. “But after meeting Bob, we quickly took our profiles down.” After dating for years, the couple married on Father’s Day this summer.

Michele Rutland of Wynantskill considers herself an on line dating dinosaur. “Back in 2005, I was one of the first people I know to try online dating,” Rutland says. “When people asked where I met someone, I would whisper ‘on line.’”

All told, Rutland says she met about 25 men, not all of whom were good matches. “I kissed a few frogs before find ing my prince,” Rutland says about her husband, John Brod erick.

But apps aren’t the only online dating option. Virtual speed dating has taken off in leaps and bounds. Once done in person before social distancing became the new normal, the Zoom “meet and greet” allows singles to connect with up to 12 potential matches in a flurry of about 90 minutes. Participants have approximately 10 minutes for each conver sation, which tends to be the usual “Where are you from?” and “What do you do?” If you’re on the shy side, organizers

can supply a handy list of questions to ask your candidates. Then, you send in the list of daters you’d like to see again, and if they also indicated interest, voila, you’re both sent con tact info.

Meetup.com is another site that provides interested singles with a chance to discover new friends or, perhaps, partners. The site is organized by interests, including everything from Reiki training, happy hours at area restaurants and swing dancing to walking tours of local sites and taking in current movies. These events take place in various settings; check the Meetup calendar online to give it a whirl.

Of course, plenty of couples still meet their sweethearts sans technical help. “I met my girlfriend the old-fashioned way,” says Sam Capuano of Lake Luzerne. “A guy walks into a bar…”

Or, you could marry your kindergarten sweetheart. Kel ly Hughes and Jeff Barcomb of Colonie were friends in ele mentary school and had their first kiss playing Spin the Bot tle. Then they drifted apart and both married other people. Flash-forward a couple of decades when the couple met by happenstance.

“I was at his restaurant in Albany planning our 30th high school reunion, and when I saw Jeff, I was instantly in love,” Hughes says. “It was literally like a lightning bolt.” She and Barcomb have been together for 12 years, married for 7. n

SAFETY TIPS FOR DATING IN TODAY’S WORLD

• Video chat before meeting

• Research their name on social media

• If you agree to meet someone, tell a friend or family member where you are going

• Meet in a public place

• If something feels wrong, follow your instincts

• Have your own transportation

• Stay sober

• Wait to share personal info

• If someone asks for money, walk away

Cari Scribner of Ballston Spa has a published humorous novel about online dating after 50 titled A Girl Like You. The sequel, A Place Like This, will be released in November.

Safety illustration: Cherednichenko.

TALES FROM AN ONLINE DATING WARRIOR

Hi, I’m Cari, and I’m an online dating veteran.

My time-consuming, ego-stomping and en tertaining journey began a few years ago following my divorce. There are too many dating apps out there to even mention, but suffice it to say I was on most of them at one time or another—some times simultaneously.

Being a writer, you’d think penning a profile would be simple. Not so! Profiles are designed to make people seem intriguing, intelligent, unique and downright ir resistible. Most of all, they have to make you stand out from the crowd.

A bit of advice if you are venturing into the rocky waters of online dating: Write about interests other than walks on the beach, kayaking and camping, because the majority of profiles list these as favorite activities.

Upload a dozen photos, ideally showing you doing

something other than kayaking. Also, enter your desired age range, location and a couple other smaller details.

Then, the search ensues. I must have sent more than 200 messages to men with well-written profiles and photos that appeared au thentic.

Most were ignored (ouch) but some ended up as first dates. I went bowling, played tennis (badly), hiked and biked, had coffee, crepes, ice cream, dinner or drinks.

I sat through one-sided con versations about annuities, fixing clothes dryers, motor cycle club trips and details about family trees.

But I gritted my teeth, squared my shoulders and refused to give up.

My foray into online dating paid off big time when I met my current serious signifi cant other a year ago.

Online dating is not for the faint of heart. It is, ulti mately, for the hopeful at heart.

Primary is

Photo courtesy Cari Scribner.

Keeping Your RelationshipFRESH

BY BRIANNA SNYDER

The kids have gone to college and are moving into adult hood. The nest is officially—and finally!—empty. It’s a time for rediscovering yourself and finally being able to do the things you and your partner have put off for all those years of child-rearing and career-pursuing and more.

There’s just one potential glitch: Who is that person staring at you across the kitchen table? Do you still have anything in common? And if you don’t, what can you do about it?

While you may feel alone in your discovery, the statistics suggest otherwise. According to Pew Research, the divorce rate for people in their 50s has nearly doubled over the past 25 years. Globally, the rates of so-called “gray divorce” are right now at their highest, according to Forbes.

Dr. Nicole Bromley, a psychologist at Albany Medical Col lege, says routines are partially to blame for couples navi gating lives side-by-side but not entirely engaged with each other. Couples often fall into domestic routines, splitting du

ties and designating responsibilities around work and money management as they raise a family together. Once the kids aren’t there anymore, incongruence or general fatigue comes to the surface.

“Some people honestly adjust very well,” says Bromley “because they have a lot of other things going on in their lives. They might have a good social network or other family they spend time with, or maybe a lot of hobbies and inter ests, and for them it’s not that much of a loss to have those kinds of changes. For people that don’t have those systems already in place, it’s a lot more of a challenge.”

Couples often find that they’ve leaned on each other for support—that they are their primary sources of social, emo tional and intellectual connection. Or they’ve fallen into a routine that doesn’t make sense anymore.

“We can have gender roles that stay in place and it’s pos

How to get reacquainted with your partner and yourself

sible the woman in the couple was primarily taking care of the home and kids,” says Bromley. “Maybe both people in the couple are working and now things may feel more equal in terms of time, and therefore there may be a change in ex pectation when it comes to those kinds of at-home things. Even with same-sex couples, there’s still those things that get negotiated through a relationship. Someone’s going to be a primary caretaker, maybe not all the time, but when the caretaking goes away, there’s a gap.”

Physical changes can also impact relationships at this life phase. Menopause, medical disruptions, deaths of parents and other traumas can all throw lives into major transition. Bromley says sometimes physical impairments can literally get in the way of couples listening to each other.

“People with hearing loss can have really bad problems,” she says. “They start bickering because one can’t hear the other. That creates a huge barrier. So even things like physi cal changes that people might go through can lead to having to renegotiate and the realization that things aren’t going to stay the way they’ve always been. So you really need to eval uate where everybody is.”

Bromley emphasizes that all couples of all makeups and orientations experience turbulence in these transitional days. So communication—and establishing your vision for your selves as a couple—is more crucial now than ever.

The key to getting reacquainted in this life phase is to ad just your expectations. You’re not who you were 20 or 30 years ago. Your partner likely isn’t, either. Recognizing that you and your partner have each evolved over the years, Bromley says, is important to learning the ways in which you

can each support your independence now and your oppor tunities as a couple.

As we get older, our attitudes, ideals, tastes, sensitivities, and libido evolve, sometimes beyond recognition to our selves or our partners. So it’s important to get on the same page about who you are now, in this moment. Asking ques tions—of ourselves and with our partner—can help provide guidance about next steps to take. Questions like:

• How do I want to spend my time?

• Are we on the same page about our future vision and goals?

• Are we compatible about our needs for affection and sex?

• Are we happy with the way we divide household roles and responsibilities?

• If we could rewrite our lives, would we still write them together?

• Who am I, who do I want to be?

These questions can be hard to answer and harder still to confront. But without tackling them, the two of you can be left guessing, judging, and misunderstanding each other.

“Whether it’s a lot of assumptions people have been making over the years or just the lifestyle changes that are happening, it’s a really good time to come together and re establish the individual self and the couple and see where they want to go from there,” Bromley says. “And sometimes it doesn’t fit. For some people it’s not fixable and you realize you had a partner that was really good for a period of time in your life and may not be a good partner for another period of your life. And that realization can be a gift.” n

Photo: Creative House.

Warming

Hot toddies for a cold weather win

BY BRIANNA SNYDER  PHOTOS BY ZOÉ FISHER PHOTOGRAPHY

My first hot toddy was served to me on a winter night in an unceremonious mug containing hot water, Evan Williams bourbon and a squeeze of bar-top lemon. I’m not telling you this for sentimental reasons. I’m establishing that a hot toddy can be many things, and even in its most stripped-down form, it is so ultimately craveable.

We do have some consensus on the basic ingredients that make a hot toddy a hot toddy: hot liquid, strong dark-col ored spirit, spices, and citrus. But what is the best—nay, perfect —combination of these things? It’s all about what you like.

The hot toddy originated in British-occupied India in the 1610s. The word “toddy” comes from the Hindi word “tad dy,” which, according to Douglas Harper’s Etymology Dic tionary, translates as “a drink made with fermented palm sap.” Eventually, it evolved to be defined as an alcoholic drink made with hot water, spices, and sugar.

These days, hot toddies are thought to be a balm for win ter illness or maybe a sleepy fireplace nightcap. Either way, they’re pretty much synonymous with “cozy.”

We talked to two mixologists in the region—Rhys Buf ford, head bartender at Wm. Farmer and Sons in Hudson, and Amanda Baker, bar manager at Nighthawks in Troy— and each had fairly different, but equally tasty, approaches to the drink.

“We make our hot toddies using fresh-squeezed lemon juice and house-made honey syrup,” Bufford says. They of fer a choice of bourbon, rye, or Scotch, and they garnish the drink with a lemon wedge and grated cinnamon.

“I generally suggest using good-quality spirits, without breaking the bank,” Bufford says. “It’s helpful to keep the proof on the lower end, as heat increases our perception of alcohol. Save the bottled-in-bond and cask-strength expres sions for sipping or cold cocktails.”

Baker has a different take: “This would be a good use for high-proof spirits,” she says. “They often have more intense flavors that stand up well in a hot toddy. Because the water

dilution is much higher than a typical cocktail, weaker spirits can get lost. Also, chai spices tend to be very strong and can benefit from a high-proof spirit for the same reason.”

Both are strong arguments. Pick your poison.

For spirits, Baker also recommends modestly priced, but still good-quality, liquor. “I recommend a bourbon or rye, like Old Grand-Dad, Four Roses or Old Overholt.”

Bring water to just below a boil, then steep tea to your liking. Add whiskey, syrup, honey, and a squeeze of lemon. Garnish with a cinnamon stick.

*Chai syrup, according to the Spruce Eats food blog, is a simple syrup made with chai spices like ginger, cinnamon, cloves, cardamom, and black pepper, but can also include other aromatic spices, like fennel, coriander seeds, and vanilla.

At Nighthawks, hot toddies are made with tea and chai syrup, allowing a more robust flavor of spices. n TODDY RECIPE HOT TODDY RECIPE

Combine ingredients in a heatproof mug. Add hot water. Grate cinnamon over the top and garnish with a lemon wedge.

*Honey syrup is 3 parts honey, 1 part hot water.

INGREDIENTS

• 6 baking apples, preferably Fuji or Gala

• ½ cup (packed) dark brown sugar

• ¾ teaspoon ground cinnamon

• ⅛ teaspoon ground nutmeg

• ⅛ teaspoon salt

• 1½ tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into small chunks

• 1½ cups apple cider or apple juice

• 2 tablespoons brandy or bourbon (optional)

• 2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice, from 1 lemon

• Vanilla ice cream, for serving (optional)

INSTRUCTIONS

1 Heat the oven to 350°F and set an oven rack in the middle posi tion.

2 Using the smaller side of a melon baller or a sharp-edged measur ing teaspoon, remove the core, leaving the bottom ½ inch of the apples intact. (Do not use an apple corer, as it’s hard to prevent the corer from going all the way through the apples.)

3 In a small bowl, mix together the brown sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt.

4 Place the apples in a 2- to 2.5-quart baking dish (they should fit snugly). Spoon the

brown sugar mixture evenly into the apples. Top each apple with a chunk of butter.

5 In a liquid measuring cup, com bine the apple cider (or juice), brandy (if using), and lemon juice. Pour around the apples. The liquid should come about 1 inch up the sides of the baking dish. Add more cider if neces sary.

6 Bake for about 45 minutes, until the apples are tender when pierced with a sharp knife. Let cool for a few minutes, then carefully transfer the apples (and some of the cooking juices, if you like) to serving bowls. Serve with vanilla ice cream, if desired.

Photos courtesy of Once Upon a Chef.

INGREDIENTS

FOR THE FRENCH TOAST

• One 1-pound challah or raisin challah

• 5 large eggs

• 1½ cups half-and-half

• 3 tablespoons maple syrup

• 2 tablespoons bourbon (optional; replace with apple cider or halfand-half if desired)

• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

• Heaping ¼ teaspoon salt

FOR THE APPLE TOPPING

• 4 tablespoons unsalted butter

• 4 large Granny Smith apples, peeled and thinly sliced

• ¼ cup + 2 tablespoons packed dark brown sugar

• 6 tablespoons maple syrup

• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

FOR SERVING

• Confectioners’ sugar and/or maple syrup

INSTRUCTIONS

FOR THE FRENCH TOAST

1 Butter a 9-by-13-inch or 3-quart baking dish. Slice the bread into ¾-inch-thick slices.

2 In a large bowl, whisk together the eggs, half-and-half, maple syrup, bourbon, vanilla, and salt.

3 Dip each slice of challah into the custard mixture for about 5 seconds, then arrange in an over lapping pattern in the prepared baking dish. Be sure the entire bottom of the dish is covered with the bread. Pour any remain ing custard over the bread. Set aside.

FOR THE APPLE TOPPING

4 In a large sauté pan, melt the but ter over medium-high heat. Add the apples, brown sugar, maple syrup, and cinnamon. Cook, stir ring frequently, until the apples

are softened and the sugar-syrup mixture is thickened, about 8 minutes. Spoon the apples and sugar-syrup mixture evenly over the bread, making sure not to leave any of the syrup behind. If not baking immediately, cover the dish with plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight. Otherwise, proceed with the recipe.

5 Heat the oven to 350°F and set an oven rack in the middle posi tion.

PUTTING IT TOGETHER

6 Cover the baking dish with aluminum foil and bake for 25 minutes. Remove the foil and continue baking until puffed and golden, about 20 minutes more. Remove from the oven and, using a fine sieve, dust with the confectioners’ sugar. Serve with maple syrup.

INGREDIENTS

FOR THE APPLE FILLING

• 5 large baking apples (about 2½ lbs), peeled and sliced ¼-inch thick (see note)

• ⅓ cup granulated sugar

• ⅓ cup (packed) dark brown sugar

• 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour

• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

• 2 tablespoons butter, cut into small pieces, plus more for greas ing the pan

FOR THE BISCUIT TOPPING

• 1½ cups all-purpose flour, spooned into measuring cup and leveled-off

• 7 tablespoons granulated sugar, divided

• 1¾ teaspoons baking powder

• ¼ teaspoon baking soda

• ¾ teaspoon salt

• 1 stick (½ cup) cold unsalted butter, cut into small chunks

• 1 cup buttermilk (see note)

FLAVOR NOTE

For the best flavor, use a combination of tart and sweet baking apples, such as Granny Smith, Honey Crisp, Gala, Jonagold, Jonathan, and Golden Delicious. (Don’t use all tart or all sweet, or the flavor won’t be balanced. I typically use 2 Granny Smiths, 2 Golden Delicious, and 1 Honeycrisp.

APPLE COBBLER

FOR SERVING (OPTIONAL)

• Vanilla ice cream or sweetened whipped cream

INSTRUCTIONS

1 Heat oven to 375°F and set an oven rack in the middle posi tion. Grease an 8-inch square or 2-quart baking dish with butter.

2 Make the Apple Filling: In a large bowl, combine the apples, gran ulated sugar, brown sugar, flour, and cinnamon. Toss until the apples are evenly coated. Trans fer the mixture to the prepared baking dish and pat into an even layer. Dot with the 2 tablespoons butter.

3 Make the Biscuit Topping: In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, 6 tablespoons of the sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Add the cold butter and smoosh with your fingers (or cut in with a pastry cutter) until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs with pea-sized clumps of butter within. Add the buttermilk and stir until just combined and

evenly moistened. It will look lumpy; that’s good. Do not over mix.

4 Using a large spoon, dollop 8 to 10 spoonfuls of the biscuit batter over the apples, allowing the filling to show through in spots (most of the filling will be covered). Sprinkle the remain ing tablespoon of sugar over the batter.

5 Bake until the fruit is bubbling and the top is golden, about 45 minutes (keep an eye on it during the last 10 minutes; if it looks like it’s getting too brown, cover it loosely with aluminum foil). Let the cobbler cool for 15 to 20 minutes, then serve with vanilla ice cream, if desired.

MAKE-AHEAD INSTRUCTIONS:

The cobbler can be made one day ahead and kept, covered with foil, at room temperature. Reheat, covered with foil, in a 300°F oven for 25 min utes, then remove the foil and con tinue reheating for 15 to 20 minutes more, or until warmed through.

A Taste of Tuscany

BY ALISON & CHRIS MICHAEL

Google “top spots to see in Tuscany” and you’re like ly to get suggestions like Siena, Pisa and Florence. What likely won’t come up is Campiglia Maritti ma—which is too bad. An ancient town that sits high in the hills of the Etruscan Coast, this off-the-beaten-path destina tion is not for the first- or even second-time traveler to Italy because it’s a little more difficult to get to. The beauty and Old World charm this town offers, however, outweigh any effort required to get there.

It had been a good 25 years since my last trip to Italy. This trip was going to take on a new meaning as I was returning to a place I had frequented as part of my previous career. Now I was taking a multigenerational vacation with my husband, our son, and my in-laws.

We stayed with a longtime family friend from Italy I met years ago while working in the textile industry, who now owns and runs a charming, Tuscan decorated four-bedroom,

Campiglia Marittima is a hidden gem worth seeking out

bed-and-breakfast named CivicoUno Campiglia in Campiglia Marittima.

Part of Tuscany’s Maremma region, Campiglia Marittima is located in the Province of Livorno, about an hour and a half southwest of Florence by car and just inland from the Mediterranean Sea. Surrounded by nature parks, this historical village perches high on the hill around the Gherar desca Castle overlooking a breathtaking view of the entire valley. Campi glia comes from the Latin campus, or “field.” In 1862 the word marittima (from Latin Maritima) was added to reflect its belonging to the Maremma, the area by the Tyrrhenian Sea.

From the moment we arrived, I felt transformed to a place where time stands still. I lost track of time, and days blended into nights. It was au thentic and real, a glimpse into what once was, what life used to be 2,000 years ago. By the second day there, neither my husband nor I knew what day it was, nor did we care—a true sign that we were on vacation!

Here are some highlights of this wonderful adventure, in case you want to visit. If you love Italy, I recommend you include this area on a future trip. It’s a place where you feel the magic of a true Tuscany gem.

Campiglia Marittima

This is a perfect destination for those who love the sea, beaches, nature, sport activities, and plenty of good food and wine. With a pace of life that encourages relaxation and unwinding, the area is close to a beautiful coast sprinkled with beaches as well many nearby small hilltop ancient villag es just a short drive away. The area is full of cultural and landscape at

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tractions, and you can spend time mountain biking, trekking or just walking through the steep alleys and ancient narrow streets.

Don’t visit here expecting large American hotels. B&Bs and boutique hotels are more the norm. Nor will you find a lot of American tourists. Instead, Campiglia Marittima is filled with vacationing tourists from Germany and Switzer land, as well as other Italians. Come expecting an authen tic immersion into Italian life that you will not experience in larger, tourist-crowded spots. While we were there, my husband and son took a bike ride through the old mining camps overlooking the Mediterranean, the vineyards and cork trees, the sunflower fields, olive trees and villages. My husband said it was a top 10 moment in his life.

Also high on the list of natural wonders during the summer months here: the incredible display of the migratory swifts as they zoom in and around the red-tiled rooftops for hours on end. These unique and highly aerial birds, migrating from South Africa, eat, sleep and drink while in flight. They make

a loud, high-pitched, chorus-like sound as they swoop ac robatically with magnificent grace across the morning and evening skies. A typical swift will fly four million miles in its lifetime, the equivalent of going to the moon and back eight times. They are a sight to behold.

Populonia

A small hamlet in Piombino, Populonia is an ancient walled city that overlooks the Baratti Gulf with beautiful views of the island in the Tuscan Archipelago. After a morning at the beach, dine alfresco under ancient olive trees at La Taverna Di Populonia, followed by a stroll along the main street for some shopping in wonderful local artisan shops.

Suvereto

Suvereto is home to many vineyards and wineries, most of which are open for tours and tastings all year round. We

55+ Life publisher Alison Michael’s Italy adventure was a multigenerational trip with (pictured above, from left) her son Luke, husband Chris and in-laws Phyllis and Rod Michael, columnist for “The Vine.” Along the way they stayed at a B&B in Campiglia Marittima owned by family friends Luca and Simonetta Vitellozzi and spent time on the hidden beach gem Spiaggia di Fetovaia on the island of Elba.

had the opportunity to take a late afternoon guided winery tour at Tenuta Casadei, a unique bio-integral wine-produc ing company that sits upon an expansive garden estate with vines surrounded by century-old trees, wild olives, maritime pines and picturesque hills. International grape varieties like petit verdot, cabernet sauvignon, muscat, syrah, mourvèdre, and grenache are grown here and used to make award-win ning Suvereto DOCG red and white wines.

Dating back to before 1000, Suvereto is considered by some to be one of the most beautiful medieval villages in Italy and is located in the Maremma area of southern Tuscany. This village is a gem of ancient walls that protect its characteristic medie val streets, stone houses, historical buildings and churches. The rich landscape surrounding the area makes it ideal for growing cork oak trees, olive groves and vines. The name Suvereto, in fact, comes from sughero, which in Italian means cork oak.

As in much of Tuscany, Suvereto has many interesting his torical sites, including the ruins of the ancient Rocca tower and the Suvereto Castle, built in the 10th century but taken over and heavily fortified by the Aldobrandeschi family. The Suvereto City Hall is in an impressive medieval building dat ing back to 1200. We dined in Suvereto in a courtyard direct ly next to the City Hall and were treated to a typical Tuscan meal of wild boar and local wines.

San Vincenzo

This local beachside town and vacation destination is a pop ular spot for water activities and dining. We ate at La Con chiglia, situated along a stretch of beach that extends eight miles along the Mediterranean sea. We were probably the only Americans—but with a little bit of Italian and lots of smiles, it was not difficult to navigate our way with the many locals enjoying their meals. We had a delicious lunch of fresh seafood while taking in the beautiful views of the islands in the Tuscan Archipelago.

Baratti Bay in Piombino

Also known as the Caribbean in Tuscany, the Gulf of Barat ti is a patch of unspoiled nature between the Tyrrhenian and Ligurian seas, situated a stone’s throw from Piombino. Since we had visited one of the local beaches in Piombino earlier that day, we skipped the beach. Instead we drove to a lovely seaport harbor called Porto di Baratti, or Port of Baratti, located on the far left end of the bay. We enjoyed Italian-style seafood at a waterfront restaurant called La Pergola. With a terrace overlooking the harbor, the restau rant was a wonderful spot to watch the sky turn from day to night in a beautiful sunset.

Below, the family on the grounds of Tenuta Casadei, a garden estate in Suvereto that produces organic wines. Opposite page, from left: a medieval castle in Populonia; the Oratory of Santa Lucia, a 16th-century religious building that stands over a lake fed by the hot springs of Venturina Terme; and signs pointing to the village of Bolgheri. YOU

Elba

An hour’s ferry ride from the mainland, Elba is the biggest island of the Tuscan Archipelago and the third largest in Italy after Sardinia and Sicily. The ferry ride was a great time to think about the island and imagine Napoleon exiled there, knowing that he saw all the same beauty that we were see ing. The island is filled with winding roads that climb moun tains and hug high sea vistas. One spiaggia, or beach, desti nation of the many to explore on Elba is a hidden gem that few American tourists see called Fetovaia. This gorgeous beach has crystal-clear water and a stunning view. You can rent umbrellas, lounge chairs and head to the water. When we visited, many people were swimming, and we snorkeled the cove and enjoyed the natural beauty around us. It was a spectacular place and one that is worth experiencing.

Bolgheri, Castagneto Carducci

Tuscany is filled with beautiful and picturesque drives on roads lined with wineries, grapes growing in vineyards, and olive trees. The real gem is the cypress-lined road leading to the village of Bolgheri.

Upon entering the walls of the village you pass the church—every village has one, and we suggest you visit them

all as each is unique and filled with art and interesting ar chitecture. Bolgheri is a quaint village with many shops fea turing local artisans and goods and restaurants. We bought many gifts for friends and family, and every restau rant looked so enticing it was hard to choose where to eat. We tasted ribol lita for the first time, a classic Tuscan soup that we will be making at home this fall and winter. At the top of the village is a spot to see the mountains and sea and snap some photos.

Venturina Terme

Before heading out to Rome, we end ed our time in Campiglia Marittima at a lovely spa and resort called Cali dario Terme Etrusche, one of several popular thermal springs located in the heart of the Etruscan coast. The alka line waters here are rich in sulfates and have been a popular destination since Etruscan and Roman times.

Calidario Terme Etrusche is set on

a peaceful hilltop just outside Venturina and features its own natural hot springs with waterfalls and a bathing area, as well as hotel rooms and dining. Our bodies soaked up some much needed relaxation after all the walking and excursions of the week. We swam in the natural waters and rejuvenated ourselves on our last night in Tuscany. Afterwards we ate at the on-site restaurant called Aquolina, which sits on the terrace overlooking the natural spring with a view framed in the classic green hills of the Tuscan coast. Our meals were delicious, made with seasonal, lo cal fresh ingredients, and we sipped some of the many great wines from this region. All of us agreed that we wished we had come to this incred ibly relaxing place sooner, as it was a most amazing all around experi ence. As we left, we visited the small church on premises that overlooked the spa under the Tuscan stars, and we were left with a wonderful mem ory and feeling as we headed back up the winding roads to Campiglia one last time. n

See more of the photos Alison and Chris Michael took on their vacation of a lifetime at 55pluslifemag.com.

The Impact of Being a Caregiver

BY BRIAN M. JOHNSON, MBA, CLTC | DIRECTOR, ADVISORS INSURANCE BROKERS

It’s no secret that Long-Term Care services such as Inhome care, Assisted Living, Memory Care and Skilled Nursing is expensive. Depending on the need, these costs can easily surpass $10,000 per month. The high cost means that not everyone will be able to get professional care. In those cases, who will provide care and what does that mean for those care providers? Today’s care environment is both a challenge for giving and receiving care. Whether by necessity or preference, care is often provided by loved ones (informal, unlicensed) at home.

According to “Long-Term Care in America: Americans Want to Age at Home” and a 2020 study by AARP, 88% of Americans would prefer to receive ongoing living assistance at home, 70% of people who provide care do so out of neces sity, and 21% of Americans are currently caregivers. As the Baby Boom generation ages, these numbers are only going to increase.

The emotional impact of caregiving. According to “Caregiving in the U.S.,” AARP, 2020, 36% of caregivers re port high emotional stress and more than half of caregivers report financial strain from caregiving. This includes an end or pause to saving for their own future, taking on more debt, using personal savings and paying bills late or sometimes not paying them at all. In 2018 report by the Harvard Business School, it’s estimated that if a caregiver is of working age, there is a 32% chance he/she will have to leave the workforce altogether due to their caregiving responsibilities. If a care giver remains employed, his or her work often suffers as they are typically tired, stressed and not able to fully concentrate on their job.

So what are our solutions? There’s no “silver bullet” here, but there are tools that can help Americans finance their po tential need for care so they’re not a burden to those they love.

MEDICARE AND MEDICAID

Pros: It’s a government funded program.

Cons: The system is difficult to navigate and getting more

restrictive. Medicare generally only covers acute care on a short-term basis (less than 100 days). Medicaid typically pays for care in a nursing home and requires an individual to financially qualify.

PERSONAL SAVINGS / RETIREMENT ASSETS

Pros: If care is never needed, assets remain intact, creating a legacy for heirs.

Cons: If care is needed younger in life, there are steep penalties for accessing tax-deferred retirement accounts ear ly. It can disrupt retirement plans or greatly impact a spouse’s standard of living if assets are needed to pay for care.

INSURANCE (LONG-TERM CARE AND HYBRID)

Pros: These policies often have robust benefits to pay for Long-Term Care services and will typically last longer than using one’s personal assets.

Cons: There are few companies offering such coverage, premiums are often cost prohibitive for most Americans, premiums in many cases are not guaranteed and qualifying medically for coverage can be difficult.

HOME HEALTHCARE PLANS

Pros: These policies are a new innovation in planning and act as more of a subscription-based plan, like AAA. There’s no medical underwriting, premiums are much more afford able than Long-Term Care insurance and subscribers get up to a maximum of 10,000 hours of home healthcare.

Cons: These policies only pay for home healthcare. If as sisted living or nursing home is needed, these plans do not pay.

So where do you go from here? Many of us have experi enced the impacts of care firsthand. Whether it’s seeing the financial cost of care for a family member or witnessing the strain put on a friend caring for a loved one, the care cri sis is all around us. The question is: what will we do about it? There are options, but one size does not fit all. To learn more, call our office and ask for our FREE planning guide, 518-688-8154.

BY SHERYL NANCE-NASH

Oui, Oui MONTREAL!

Want to experience a taste of Europe without jump ing on a plane? The magic of Montreal, with its combination of Old World charm and hip, cos mopolitan chic, is just a few hours’ drive up the Northway.

The 380-year-old city that is home to nearly 2 million is the second largest French-speaking city in the world. (Don’t worry if you don’t speak French; English is spoken every where.) Montreal also has the highest number of restaurants per capita in Canada, and in North America is second only to New York City. In other words, leave your diet plan at home. With restaurants featuring the cuisines of Algeria, France, Haiti, Iran, Italy, Korea, Lebanon, Morocco, Portu gal, Thailand, Tibet, Vietnam and more, visiting Montreal can be a mini global cuisine tour.

Old Montreal and Old Port are must-see parts of any vis it, with blocks of narrow, cobblestone streets reminiscent of Europe. One of the top spots to visit is Notre-Dame Basilica of Montreal, a Gothic Revival-style church whose beauty is renowned. You can take a tour of the church alone, but it would be a mistake not to also try to take in AURA, a mul timedia extravaganza video, light and music show that de fies description. The show occurs twice daily in the evening. Tickets are available for the church or show individually or as packages.

A taste of Europe is just a short drive away

To get another perspective of Old Port, consider check ing it out from the air—specifically zip lining via the MTL Zipline. The zip line, which is 1,200 feet, gives a bird’s-eye view of Bonsecours Island.

Saint-Paul and de la Commune streets in Old Montreal are home to historic buildings as well as boutiques, restaurants and nightclubs. The Pointe-à-Callière Montreal Museum of Archaeology and History Complex is the perfect place to get familiar with Montreal’s history. Located on the site where Montreal was founded, it includes a glass floor overlooking the remains of Fort Ville-Marie as well as traces of an Aboriginal hearth. The museum also features new exhibits annually.

Walking tours, of which there are many options, are anoth er way to explore Montreal. Take a historic tour through Old Montreal or consider a nighttime ghost walking tour. Art lov ers might consider the two-hour street art tour along Montre al’s Saint Laurent Boulevard to enjoy over 100 works of art.

Need an arts fix? Downtown Montreal offers plenty of ac tion as well, from the theater to the symphony. The cultural epicenter is the Montréal Museum of Fine Arts in downtown with concerts, events and shows.

VENTURE INTO THE NEIGHBORHOODS

Montreal has vibrant, unique neighborhoods full of person

ality and worthy of visits. Mile-End, with its bookstores, cafes and murals, is reminiscent of Brooklyn’s hip Williams burg section. Plateau-Mont-Royal is more bohemian, featur ing colorful houses with outdoor staircases, vintage shops, boutiques, and great finds like cool $5 earrings, scarves and more. With the plethora of restaurants and coffee shops, you won’t go hungry.

For an artistic vibe, check out Mont-Royal, home to many of the city’s artists. Mont-Royal Park features 400 acres of park space and 600 acres of cemetery. In the winter, it’s a prime locale for ice-skating, and in the warmer months, cy cling and jogging. The Outremont neighborhood is all about mega mansions, with parks and upscale shopping.

Saint Laurent Boulevard is the place to be and be seen for shopping, dining and profiling in this fashion-conscious city. Saint Denis Street is home to some of Quebec’s homegrown designers’ clothes, while Laurier and Bernard av enues are for all things French—clothes, gourmet shops, bakeries and more.

Other gems to check out include Ex-Voto in Little Italy where you can find candles, jewelry, and vintage clothing; and Boutique Stockmarkt, a shop in Little Burgundy that carries quality seconds, like last season’s to-die-for items. If

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you want some quiet time, Place Kate-McGarrigle, a small park and public square near Querbes Avenue on Laurier Av enue, is a good place to chill. The PHI Centre is a VR (virtu al reality) cinema where reality, artistry and surprises come together for a unique experience.

No need to rent a car when visiting Montreal. You can go just about everywhere on the Metro, by taxi or by renting a bike. Nor do you need to worry about visiting Montreal in the winter. Life bustles in its Underground City with more than 1,000 stores, spas, restaurants, and movie theaters all located underground.

WHERE TO EAT

In a city of thousands of restaurants, how do you begin to choose where to eat? Taking a food tour to get a rich sam pling of the good eats is one option. Here are some favorites to consider as well. Fleurs et Cadeaux (1002 Rue Saint-Ur bain) serves up Japanese cuisine in a former flower and gift shop. Feast on temaki (hand-rolled sushi), creative bento boxes, artisanal sakes, natural wine and more.

For more than 40 years L’Express (3927 Saint Denis St.) has been one of the city’s go-to French bistros. Try the steak tartare, duck foie gras, chicken liver pate, grilled salmon, frites and other French delights. Like wine? The collection has some 11,000 bottles.

Moccione (7495 Saint Denis St.) is a favorite for Italian food. It was the Eater Montreal Restaurant of the Year in 2019. The gnocchi and tiramisu are among the dishes that get rave reviews.

In Old Montreal, consider Monarque (406 Rue Saint-

Jacques), known for its lobster thermidor, escargot, and fish and seafood bouillabaisse. Toqué! (900 Pl. Jean-PaulRiopelle) keeps a spot on the Top 10 in Canada’s 100 Best list. Order the scallop ceviche, heirloom tomatoes with goat cheese, almonds, currant dressing and basil or the duck con fit and you’ll know why. Joe Beef (2491 Notre-Dame St. W), beloved by Anthony Bourdain, is another must-eat restau rant. The lobster spaghetti and foie gras are winners.

WHERE TO STAY

This November, Hyatt Centric Hôtel Gare Viger (621 No tre-Dame St. E) opens in the historic Place Gare Viger that was built in 1898 in the traditional British railway hotel style. Anticipate stately rooms and lounging on the rooftop pool in the heart of Old Montreal.

Vogue Hotel Montreal Downtown (1425 Rue de la Mon tagne) is newish to the hotel scene. It’s on the elegant Golden Square Mile, near shops, museums, and parks.

The Ritz-Carlton, Montreal (1228 Sherbrooke St. W) is the only AAA Five Diamond property in Quebec. A bonus is the restaurant Maison Boulud on-site, and pets are allowed at the hotel.

The stylish Hotel William Gray (421 Rue Saint-Vincent), in a former 18th century greystone in Old Montreal, is an other option. Everything about it is chic and sophisticated.

Also high on the elegant meter is Hotel Place d’Armes (55 Rue Saint-Jacques), situated in four 19th century neoclassical buildings across from the Notre-Dame Basilica, and near the Old Port. I felt like royalty staying there. Enjoy the spa and the rooftop terrace for panoramic city views. n

 The AURA experience at Notre-Dame Basilica. Photo: Moment Factory

Decorating with Houseplants

Tips from the pros on greening up your home

BY REBECCA GATTO

The way we decorate our homes can influence our emotions, our self-expression, and even our health. But it can be hard to know how to make an interior space truly sparkle. Adding houseplants, professionals say, is one of the simplest and most effective ways to elevate a space from almost-right to absolutely perfect.

Jessica Caccamo knows what it’s like to agonize over a room’s design—she remembers when her bedroom, in par ticular, had her stumped. After spending hours choosing and hanging the perfect full-length mirror, she expected to be ec static, but something still wasn’t right.

“I hung it up and I thought, I don’t know,” she recalls. “It just feels a little bit dead.”

Luckily for Jessica, her mom, Lynda, has more than 25 years of experience in the design world. “Mom was like, ‘You

just need some plants,’” Jessica says. After placing a leafy ZZ Plant (short for zamioculcas zamiifolia) on a stand and a smaller plant nearby on the floor, the area was completely transformed.

Today, Jessica and Lynda, aged 35 and 63 respectively, have created an interior design firm that helps others trans form their houses into stylish oases. Branded as JL Cacca mo Design, they work with homeowners, renters, real estate agents, and people looking to downsize their homes. Their goals are to create spaces that are functional, comfortable, and beautiful—and they rarely leave a space without adding a houseplant or two.

“It’s a great way to bring that natural element into your home and really make your home look loved and cared for,” Lynda says.

Denise Maurer, a master gardener in Rensselaer County, agrees wholeheartedly that plants can work wonders for any home. In fact, she’s proudly cared for a ficus she purchased on her honeymoon for 43 years—a feat that many new plant parents can hardly fathom. The secret, she says, is to learn a little about your houseplants’ origins.

“The one basic rule of maintaining plants is to try to maintain the same growing conditions they experience out side,” she says. For example, spiky succulents need lots of sun and not too much water, and therefore thrive best near a southern or western window. Ferns, orchids, and other plants that naturally occur in the undergrowth of shady for ests can thrive with less sun—although they can’t be com pletely in the dark.

“I always stress that they do need a source of light,” Maurer says. “It’s only going to be a slow death if you don’t give the basic needs.” (Want to learn more? Maurer’s class, House plants 101, is available for free on the Troy Public Library’s YouTube page.)

Maurer adds that plants can also clean the air they interact with. She recalls inheriting one houseplant from a smoker, and when she treated the roots with clean water, it leached brown tar for three days—toxins that were captured when they were removed from the previous owner’s indoor air.

In short, filling your space with plants can be a nice way to bring visual interest, texture, and life to the space, all while giving a boost to your mental and physical health.

As Jessica of JL Caccamo Design says, “When in doubt, try a plant!” n OlgaMiltsova. following houseplants can be kept in indirect sunlight. Make sure to research how frequently your plants need to be watered.

DECORATING TIPS FROM THE PROS

Consider light

“If you want a houseplant to bring life to your space, the worst thing you can do is put a houseplant in a place where it’s going to die,” Jessica says. “You re ally have to consider the natural light conditions you have in your home.”

Supplementing with a grow light is one solution for poorly lit rooms. It doesn’t need to be anything too fan cy. Maurer has kept her ficus alive for more than four decades, partly by add ing an inexpensive utility lamp from a hardware store that she hooked up to a timer. It shines on the little tree for six hours each day, keeping it healthy.

Pay close attention

It’s OK if you’re not sure exactly where a new plant should be placed; just keep an eye on it to see whether it succeeds.

Even with a good deal of experience, Jessica Caccamo says she nearly killed a rubber tree that wasn’t getting the right amount of light. “We moved it to a new spot and it’s just been thriving ever since with really minimal care,” she says.

Group your plants

Maurer says placing plants together, near a window, will make sure they all get enough light—but it does more than that. “Grouping plants is very import ant because they support each other,” she says. When multiple houseplants share a space, they create a microcli mate that helps them all to thrive.

Vary the size

Arranging houseplants in a group is great for the health of your greenery, but it’s also good design. Using a vari

ety of heights, sizes, and textures adds a professional-looking touch to any room. Try using a plant stand to add some height until you feel confident enough to add something larger (and more expensive).

It’s OK to cheat a little

Jessica says she uses a mix of fake and real plants in her home. For example, she put a faux snake plant in a dark corner. Not only would a real one not get enough light, but she worried that her cat would chew a real one—and snake plants can be toxic to pets. Just remember to dust the impostors now and then. “If you have to go up and touch it to see if it’s the real deal, that’s a good test,” Lynda Caccamo says. The mother-daughter design team recom mends afloral.com for realistic-looking faux houseplants.

Discover Forest Grove & Waite Meadows

New single-family homes & twin homes

This amazing new-home community has something for everyone with homes ranging from luxury, twin homes to a variety of single-family homes, all located on heavily wooded lots. When completed, Forest Grove will offer more than 300 homes and a breadth of amenities, such as a fully furnished clubhouse, a massive fitness center, a beautiful outdoor pool, pickle-ball, and more.

Designed to encourage residents to get outdoors, Forest Grove features sidewalks, street lamps, a dog park and several miles of walking trails, some paved for strollers, bicycles and easy walking and others that are natural forest floors. Over 300 acres of open space, donated by Belmonte Builders to the Town of Wilton, makes these trails possible.

• Homes in all sizes with many options to choose from

• Saratoga Springs address, low Wilton taxes

• Saratoga Schools

• Five minute drive to downtown Saratoga Springs

• A beautiful community with amenities for all ages

• Homes starting in the $500’s

For more information, contact Sharon Byrne 518-527-4914 or sharon@belmontebuilders.com

Conveniently located just off of Route 146 in Clifton Park, Waite Meadows is an exclusive new 34- home community happily situated in the country. Located just a short drive from downtown and the Northway, Waite Meadow’s quiet, picturesque setting is minutes away from great shopping and dining.

A welcoming boulevard and three large estate lots greet you as you enter Waite Meadows. Large lots, public water and sewer, extensive green space, a dedicated walking trail, street lights and access to the renown Shenendehowa school district make this beautiful community the perfect place to call home.

• Community walking trail & green space

• Shenendehowa Schools

• Great location, close to downtown Clifton Park

• Variety of floor plans in our Portfolio and Prestige series of homes

• Homes starting in the $600’s

For more information, contact Spencer Lewis 518-512-9646 or spencer@belmontebuilders.com

To learn more about Belmonte Builders’ Communities and Floor Plans, visit: www.belmontebuilders.com

In neighborhoods with a Homeowner's Association, Homeowners will be subject to all HOA covenants and design guidelines and will be required to pay HOA dues. For complete details see your sales representative.

Roads were made for journeys.

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Repair

Replace?or

What you need to know about the lifespan of your appliances

BY CAITLIN MANNER

New appliances can feel like a fresh start, but they can also be a huge investment, one many of us typically put off as long as possible. Most major home appli ances have a lifespan between 10 and 15 years. So how do you know when you need to replace something, as opposed to get ting it repaired? We talked to Alan Ayers of Crisafulli Bros. Home Services and Gary Cornwell of Cornwell Appliance, both in Albany, to get the scoop on how to tell the difference.

Cornwell Appliance has been in business since 1948, while Crisafulli Bros. was established in 1939. When the appliance was built is a critical marker, says Cornwell. Many older ap pliances were designed to last, or at least to be something relatively easy to repair. You can’t really say the same about the newest iterations, says Cornwell, who has been in the family business for as long as he can remember. “It’s sad, re ally. If you remember years ago, you know, my parents had their washing machine for 20, 30 years,” he says. “But now,

for the quality they make for $599, they call me within a year on the new ones.”

Ayers agrees, citing hot water heaters as just one exam ple. “Hot water heaters used to last a lot longer, but over the past few years the lifespan has decreased significantly. That happened for a number of reasons, but now they need to be replaced much, much sooner than they used to, like every seven years or so. We as consumers are at fault, really, be cause we want to cut costs and save money, so the products just aren’t built as well,” he says.

So the question remains: When do you repair a major ap pliance versus replace it? Cornwell offers this advice: When you start to notice something is off—such as a strange new sound or your water bill creeping up—it’s time to call an ex pert. Get an estimate for a repair, and then follow the 50/50 rule. If the appliance is more than halfway through its typical lifespan, and it will cost half as much to repair as to replace

it, just replace it. Or at least, that is true about any appliance bought within the last decade or so. If it’s one of those solid workhorses from a previous generation, you could have a good shot at a lasting fix, Cornwell says.

As with many objects, the best way to save money is to focus on maintenance. The cost of a technician coming to di agnose a problem can seem prohibitive, but a few small fixes over the years is still cheaper than buying a new appliance every time an issue develops.

With some appliances, keeping track of when you last replaced the item is another important step. Water heaters, for example, will need replacing regularly and a lot sooner than you may think. Waiting for a water heater to fail before taking any action can end up costing you more, as a burst tank causes a big mess and costly cleanup. Ayers says people should “start budgeting for a replacement after about seven years, which may feel really quick—but waiting for much longer will cause issues.”

Ayers recommends that people—particularly those 55 years and older, who may not have a house full of people anymore—opt for the tankless option when replacing their water heaters. “They do require a little bit more maintenance, but the energy savings and efficiency will end up saving you money and last a few years longer as well.” n

Cornwell says that one of the most common problems he sees is refrigerators straining to keep things cold, especially in the summertime. Sometimes, it’s an easy fix you can do your self. “You should periodically take the grill off the front of the fridge, at the very bottom. It’ll pop right off and you can see that it’s loaded under there with dust and lint and pet hair,” he says. “That’s gonna burn the motor compressor out, because the air can’t get through. It’ll save you $500, doing that quick maintenance instead of having to replace a whole motor.”

• MICROWAVES are relatively afford able, so it’s usually cheaper to replace one than to pay to have it repaired. The same goes for coffee makers and other smaller kitchen appliances.

• DISHWASHERS should have a lifes pan of about 10 years, but the level of cleanliness they can achieve will slowly decline over time. If yours starts making loud noises, leaking, or emitting a funny smell, it’s time to call in a technician for an evaluation.

• STOVES AND OVENS typically should last up to 15 years, or even longer in the case of gas ranges. That said, you shouldn’t take any chances with any thing that can catch fire. Many stoves and ovens come with warranties, and it could be well worth your time to pay for parts and labor rather than invest in a whole new setup.

• REFRIGERATORS are a necessity, and if they’re not working properly it can end up costing you a fortune in spoiled food. Most models should last up to 13 years, but many will develop some common problems over time. Changes to look for include visible condensation, excessive noise, frost buildup in the freezer, and whether or not the back of the refrigerator is hot to the touch.

• WASHERS AND DRYERS should also last about a decade, but it’s easy to tell when they aren’t working well anymore. For the washer, call a tech nician if there is water leaking on the floor, excessive noise, or if water no longer fills the drum. For dryers, call someone if the clothes aren’t drying, or if there is a burning smell when it’s in use. Dryers are another appliance that you don’t want to take chances with, because they are one of the most common causes of house fires.

• WATER HEATERS are tougher to gauge. Generally, they last 10 years or so, but if you’re noticing a problem odds are that it’s time for replace ment. Problem signs include leaks under the water tank, water discol oration or odor, weird sounds, or an inability to maintain a steady tem perature.

• FURNACES OR FORCED-AIR SYSTEMS have an average lifespan of about 15-20 years, depending on maintenance and usage. Typically, signs they are nearing their expira tion date include poor air quality in the home (excess dust or humidity), rising energy bills, odd noises, and needing frequent repairs for mal functions.

WHETHER TO REPLACE OR REPAIR AN APPLIANCE depends a bit on the appliance itself. Here’s a cheat sheet for weighing your decisions.

Putting Your Best Foot forward

How to keep those tootsies in top shape

BY BRIANNA SNYDER

It’s easy to take our feet for granted—especially in our younger years—but as we get older, they can be just one more source of discomfort and pain as ligaments slacken and muscles lose their elasticity.

A 2016 study reported in U.S. News & World Report found that foot pain affects 1 in 4 adults after age 45. In at least two-

PLANTAR FASCIITIS

thirds of those cases, that pain can be debilitating. And that can be dangerous: U.S. News also reports that foot pain in older adults is associated with a 62 percent increased risk of recur rent falls, according to a study in a 2017 issue of Gerontology Here are a few things to look out for—and get ahead of—as your feet enter their 50s and beyond.

What it is: “One thing that we see a lot in older folks is plantar fasciitis,” says Dr. Steven Lam of Capital Region Foot Care in Albany. As we get older, we lose tightness in the muscles of our feet and the fascia, a ligament located at the bottom of the foot, can become more easi ly inflamed. You might experience this as heel pain or arch pain, which are the early signs of plantar fasciitis.

What to do: Stretch, stretch, stretch. “You can easily take care of plantar fasciitis discomfort by stretching,” Lam says. Grab your toes, for example, and pull them up. While sitting on a chair, step your foot onto a water bottle or a foam roller (or anything else firm and cylindri cal) and roll your foot back and forth on top of it. For particularly uncomfortable days, a fro zen water bottle or soda can may provide even more relief and help reduce swelling.

BUNIONS

What it is: A bunion may look and feel like a growth, but it’s actually the result of your bones migrating inward. “Bunions are a progressive disorder,” says Lam. “The big toe starts to drive closer to the second toe, then the bone behind it starts to drive in the opposite direction.” That can cause an uncom fortable protrusion on the inner side of your foot that’s easily irritated by tight or ill-fitting shoes.

What to do: Bunions can be genetic and they can also result from certain types of shoes or foot gear. Dress shoes can ex acerbate things, as can shoes that aren’t wide enough. “Our feet tend to swell by the end of the day,” Lam says. “So shoes that fit earlier in the day may not fit anymore by 3, 4, 5 in the afternoon.” So make sure your shoes fit you well, and offer a little room for longer days on your feet.

“In some instances, bunions can be painful enough that they require surgical removal,” Lam says. If that sounds familiar, it might be a good idea to consult your doctor or podiatrist.

Embracing Innovation to Improve Care and Provide Peace of Mind

At The Pines at Glens Falls, we know that providing exceptional care requires superior technology. The introduction of Circadia Health’s Contactless Remote Patient Monitoring System allows our teams to enhance the level of care our residents receive.

The symptoms of many illnesses such as pneumonia, bronchitis, COVID-19, and UTIs can be detected 2-3 days earlier by utilizing this remote technology that is placed in every patient room.

The FDA-approved system is supported by a panel of clinicians who analyze the data and medical records for each patient to look for patterns. It alerts our staff members when changes in condition occur.

INGROWN TOENAILS

What it is: While people of all ages may have to contend with an ingrown nail at some point in their lives, older people are more prone to them. Caused by snug-fitting shoes or trauma (say you stub your toe in the middle of the night, sending your nail digging into the skin of your toe), ingrown nails can be quite painful and difficult to treat on your own, especially because toenails grow thicker as we age, and bending down to tend to them may be more difficult for some.

What to do: Routine hygiene of your feet—cleaning and nail-trimming—is key to prevention. Don’t cut your toenails in a curve; cut them straight across. Again, wear shoes that fit and wear the proper footwear for the proper activity. Ath letes, particularly runners, should keep their nails short.

The benefits of this technology include:

• Early detection of changes within residents that may not yet be visible to the eye

• Enables early intervention and treatment to be conducted in-facility

• Reducing and/or preventing admissions, readmissions, and emergency department visits Ridofranz; 3xy.

170 Warren Street | Glens Falls, NY 12801 T: 518.793.5163 | F: 518.793.5165

www.PinesGlensFalls.com

CALLUSES

What they are: Thicker patches on the soles and sides of your feet may become tough and uncomfortable as we age.

What to do: Keeping your feet clean and using a pumice stone to wear down calluses are reli

able ways of minimizing discomfort from cal luses. But Lam says sometimes they can grow thick enough that you’ll need medical interven tion. “Take care of your nails monthly,” says Lam. “Look at the bottoms of your feet period ically to make sure no calluses have built up. If you notice anything strange or uncomfortable, you should probably consult your podiatrist.”

So how often should you see a podiatrist? Dr. Lam says lots of people, particularly ones who are active and on their feet regularly, likely won’t need to check in very much with a podiatrist—unless they have one or more of the chronic issues mentioned above. Certain medical conditions, such as diabetes, also might require more frequent checkups.

Mainly, though, good foot hygiene, stretching and the right shoes will go a long way.

And, by the way, Lam recommends against those trendy “foot masks” that can cause dramatic skin peeling when used on feet. “You have to be really careful with those,” he says. “They’re chemicals that are built to take off the outer layers of your skin. If not applied appropriately or applied too long, they can cause minor burning. Plus, if you remove a lot of those outer layers it’s easier to get irritation [such as] blistering and things like that.”

“There’s nothing wrong with applying lotion to the feet at night. Use a pumice stone a couple times a week and very rarely will you need a peel like that,” he adds. “That’s more of a fad than anything.” n

Artwork: iStockphoto.com. Photo: Ridofranz; illustration: 3xy.

As advocate

Exercise as a Pill

The aging process brings about many changes to the body, but that doesn’t mean you should stop or not start to be active, no matter what your age. Activities of daily living can become more chal lenging and strenuous, which generally brings about a de cline in physical activity. Phys ical activity is the ultimate drug to combat many diseases. Ex ercise has shown to be an al ternative to prescription drugs for many conditions, including heart disease, anxiety, depression, diabetes, and certain types of can cer. Men were estimated to gain up to 2.6 hours of life per one hour of moder ate activity and 5.4 hours of life per vigorous activity. On the other hand, women were estimated to gain up to 5.6 hours of life for moderate activity and 11.3 hours of life for every hour of vigorous activity. Exercise is one of the only drugs that does not have side effects.

In a 2016 study, the American College of Sports Medicine suggests that every person should be physically active for a minimum of 150 minutes weekly, as little as 30 minutes 5 days a week, of moderate-intensity physical activity; if that is too difficult, 150 minutes of light-intensity activity. Additionally, as you age it’s important to also do exercises that help with increasing or maintaining flexibility and strength so that you can keep doing your activities of daily living without becoming dependent on others. Aim for two to three days a week.

Incorporating exercise into life if you are sedentary can feel overwhelming or recognizing you need to incorporate more of it into your routine for those already active can be an eye-rolling moment, but exercise in general makes you feel stronger, more confident and yes, healthier — because you’re doing something good for yourself, your body.

To help break down the prescription of exercise as we age, exercise goals can be categorized into three levels/categories: bronze, silver, and gold.

Aim for 150 minutes a week of light-intensity activity. Things like walk ing, swimming, or cycling are good examples.

• Silver: This is for the person who has been exercising consis tently and reaching their mini mum cardiovascular activity. The aim should be to include strength and flexibility train ing. Examples could be things like squats, push-ups, planks, and including some form of stretching or foam rolling work.

• Gold: This is for the person that has been exercising consistently, including cardio and strength-building exercises. You may want to add plyometric strength and power exercises (e.g., medicine ball work, jumping, hoping, and ballistic kettlebell movements). These types of exercises help combat a de cline in neuromuscular function as we age, which can help activities of daily living and movement capacities. Whichever category you fall into, the ultimate exercise pill is movement. If you are engaging in that already, then push it to the next level. It can feel overwhelming and the initial investment is hard, but starting a long-term program with a fitness expert who can customize a plan for you might be your next step. The most important part of any form of exer cise plan is it should be something you enjoy by yourself or with other friends and family.

REFERENCES:

• Bice, M., R., Hanson., N., Eldridge, J., Reneau, P., & Powell, D., W. (2011). Neuromuscular adaptations in elderly adults are task-specific during stepping and obstacle clearance tasks. International Journal of Exercise Science, 4(1), 278-286. http://www.intjexersci.com.

• Moore G. E., Durstine, L., J., & Painter, P., L., (2016). ACSM’s Exer cise Management for Persons With Chronic Diseases and Disabili ties-4th Edition

• Sallis, R. (2014). Exercise is medicine: a call to action for physicians to assess and prescribe exercise. The Physician and Sportsmedicine, 43(1). https://doi.org/10.1080/00913847.2015.1001938 DEMETRIOU, M.S. |

ch-ch-ch-

Why embracing change is a good idea

BY BENITA ZAHN

Humans hate change. Plain and simple. Even if we don’t like where we are, the thought of moving on can be both frightening and daunting. It’s not a character flaw; it’s human nature. Change is scary.

Even if we’re yearning for change, we often balk at making the move because we know what we have. Research finds we shy away from change because we fear loss of control, fear of the unknown, worry that the new won’t be better than the old—and then we resist doing the work required to change.

It’s often said that “Change occurs when the pain of re maining the same is greater than the pain of changing.” But why wait? Why experience and endure that pain? Isn’t it bet ter to experience the “pain” of change before the pain associ ated with the need to change becomes unbearable?

How do you know if you’re ready for change? In 1977, re searchers James Prochaska and Carlo Di Clemente created the Transtheoretical Model of Change, which outlines five stages of change:

Stage 1 precontemplation

Stage 2 contemplation

Stage 3 preparation

Stage 4 action

you’re no longer making the change; you are living it. So how to change? Here are some steps to get started:

• Set the goal. Decide what needs to be changed.

• Make a plan that is SMART … specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound. In short, don’t de cide to run a marathon in a month. It takes, on average, 20 weeks to train for that run. So you have to decide on the “what” and then break it into realistic steps with an achievable timetable. As the great lyricist Stephen Sond heim wrote, “step by step, putting it together.”

• Enlist a coach or other support person. Research finds that when we have a partner, we are more likely to stick with and achieve our goals.

• Review and revise your goals as you proceed. Is the change still relevant? Is it too easy? Can you do more? Do you need more time?

• Plan celebrations along the way. Waiting until you’ve reached the maintenance stage may be too long to wait. We need encouragement even before we get there. Celebrate the little victories. Perhaps it’s losing the first five pounds of an overall goal of 50 or running a 5K on your way to a half marathon or cleaning out one closet of the home you’re planning to sell.

Stage 5 maintenance

Talking with a counselor or spending some quality time reflecting are good ways to test your readiness for change. In precontemplation change may be a fleeting thought. But once you hit the preparation stage, you are making plans to embrace something new. Action is making the change, while maintenance is living the change.

Yes, despite our best plans and intentions we may relapse. Some experts suggest relapse is a sixth stage. Understand that relapse doesn’t mean failure. It provides an opportuni ty to reevaluate, make adjustments and resume the “change journey.” After all, if change was easy, everyone would do it. Once you achieve your goal and move onto maintenance,Benita Zahn photo by Kris Qua Photography.

• Don’t change because someone says you should. Change has to come from within. Remember when you were a kid and you were told to go clean up your room? Odds are you dug in your heels and became angry. But if you wanted to clean up your mess, nothing could stop you. That doesn’t change as we age.

• Take stock as we move toward the new year. Do you want 2023 to be a repeat of 2022? Are there changes you’ve been contemplating? Like every great journey, change starts with the first step. Happy travels! n

BENITA ZAHN is a certified health and wellness coach working in the Capital Region. Visit benitahealthcoach.com.

Worried About ‘Senior Moments’?

BY REBECCA GATTO

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, colloquial wisdom indicates that a puzzle a day keeps the senior moments away. But do focused activities like Sudoku or the Wordle really help protect your memory as you age?

According to Dr. Rebecca Stetzer, geriatric specialist at Albany Med, they might—if you enjoy them and they chal lenge you. But they are worth much more as part of a ho listic approach.

“The best way to engage cognitively is to be learning new things,” says Stetzer, who is an associate professor, assistant dean, and part of the faculty for the Geriatric Fellowship program, in addition to seeing patients of her own aged 75 and older.

Stetzer says if you do love puzzles, multifaceted ones are best, especially if they’re also social. Bridge is a good example. “You have to keep track of strategy and you’re interacting at the same time so you’re doing multiple things at once,” she says.

Stetzer cited a favorite study showing that learning new things can actually increase people’s brain matter volume. In the study, MRIs of participants learning to juggle showed similar growth whether they were 20 years old or 60—and

whether they actually became proficient at juggling or not.

THE MIND-BODY CONNECTION

One important way to keep your mind sharp is to keep your heart healthy. Dr. Roberta Miller, an internal medical spe cialist who just recently retired from private practice, devot ed much of her career to caring for homebound individuals, first through the Veterans Administration and then through Homedical Administrative Associates, founded by her hus band Dr. David Hornick in 2004.

“I think that one of the things that’s very important is that there has to be healthy living prior to aging because it’s all connected,” Miller says. “It’s very important people are aware that dementia is a slowly progressive illness and there may be ways to forestall it or prevent it by having a healthy lifestyle, for sure.”

Follow these doctors’ tips to sharpen your memory iStockphoto.com/Drazen Zigic.

Miller suggests regular visits to a primary care provider to screen for issues such as hypertension, which can lead to brain damage and dementia in the future. She also says it’s important to have your pharmacist and primary physician monitor medications for possible interactions, since confu

PLAYING BRIDGE is a good example of a memory-boosting activity that both keeps your mind engaged and encourages social interaction.

sion can be a side effect of some drugs. One helpful resource is the American Geriatric Society’s Beers Criteria, which lists medications, including over-the-counter varieties, that can be dangerous to the aging brain.

And then there are the drugs Miller says no one needs. The brain-enhancing supplements that populate television info mercials and online pop-up ads are a waste of money, in her experience. “There are a bunch of them on TV to improve your memory,” she says. “There’s absolutely no proof by sci ence that these are helpful. They haven’t been peer-reviewed.”

Stetzer also emphasized the effect of cardiovascular health on cognition. She recommends following a Mediterranean diet, which is characterized by high consumption of olive oil and plant foods, moderate wine-drinking with meals, moder ate intake of fish, seafood, poultry, eggs, and fermented dairy products such as yogurt and cheese, and a small amount of red and processed meats and sweets. “You can always feel good about it when you’re putting lots of olive oil in your food,” she says.

FRIENDS MAKE LIFE MEMORABLE

One often-overlooked component of brain health is simply to have some fun, especially with friends. Stetzer says exer cise is even more beneficial if you’re socially active. Tennis, in particular, has been shown to be helpful because it’s stra tegic, requires quick reactions, and is social. Table tennis, for that matter, is a great choice as well. Even a walk with friends is better than walking solo.

“The people that I see age well are those that are interest ed and engaged and have a reason to get up,” Stetzer says. “They’re volunteering or they’ve got a busy social schedule.”

Miller advises staying on top of regular screenings for hearing, eyesight, and cognition as one way to avoid the pit falls of isolation. “As we age, our world tends to get small er, and people tend to get more isolated,” she says. “And we have sensory loss, such as visual and hearing, and those all contribute to isolation and so it’s very important that those things are looked into.”

ENHANCING THE AGING BRAIN

While Stetzer’s patients may be aging, that’s not a bad thing in and of itself. “There’s so much negativity about it, but one of the things we see with aging brains is that with time, you have more neural connections. And also, you see more use of both hemispheres of the brain,” she says.

So while some minor lapses in memory may feel frustrat ing, Stetzer says there are upsides. “Circuits run a little slow er and it’s harder to run multiple circuits at once”—think of walking from one room to another and forgetting why you went there—but “you’re able to make deeper connections, you’re able to have that wisdom of experience and the capac ity for complex thought,” she says. “The privilege of working with older adults is (that) I see so many of those benefits.” n

Helping Seniors Live Their Best Lives

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Family Affair

Coping with an adult child’s mental illness as a parent

BY THERESA SULLIVAN BARGER

Before attending a family wedding a few months ago, Lisa Trudeau emailed all her siblings urging them not to ask her 25-year-old son whether he was working or in school. Her son is living with mental illness and, she told her siblings, if they ask these questions, he’s going to feel badly about himself.

As any parent of an adult child with mental illness knows, the role is challenging enough without friends’ and family members’ judgment, uninformed advice and interference. Those well-meaning questions would have likely triggered a downhill spiral, says Trudeau, a retired Albany resident.

“I get a lot of the, ‘You’re too easy on him. You need to dis cipline him more,’” she says. There are no simple life hacks for parenting an adult child with mental illness. “It’s a matter of being there for him,” she says. She has learned that when her son, who has anxiety and schizoaffective disorder, is up set, she has to wait for him to settle his emotions; only then can they discuss what happened.

While it may feel as if you’re alone as a parent of a young adult living with a mental health issue, you’re not. Data from June 29 to July 1 from the U.S. Centers for Diseases Con trol and Prevention’s Household Pulse Survey shows 43% of adults ages 18 to 29 experienced symptoms of an anxiety or depressive disorder in the previous two weeks, while 37% of those 30 to 39 reported feeling anxious or depressed in the past 14 days.

The pandemic has taken a significant toll on young adults, many of whom grew up practicing active-shooter drills in school and who now live with financial uncertainty, a na tion divided and extreme weather events. According to the American Psychological Association’s 2020 Stress in Ameri ca survey, 34% of those 18 to 23 said their mental health has deteriorated compared with before the pandemic, and 19% of millennials reported a decline in their mental health from the previous year.

Whether your adult child struggles with anxiety, depres

Photo:

sion, bipolar disorder, an eating disorder, schizophrenia, or another mental illness, parents face trials that challenge their wisdom, patience, and their own mental well-being. While circumstances vary depending on the severity of the adult child’s mental illness, parents have to walk a fine line between supporting their adult kids to be as independent as possi ble and enabling them in a way that makes them financially or emotionally dependent, mental health experts say. And sometimes, despite expressions of love and parental support, adults with mental illness make choices that upset us.

“I say to parents, you can be supportive, but when you push or overstep boundaries, it can backfire,” says Jennifer Trudeau-Brown, a licensed mental health counselor with One Roof Holistic Health Center in Saratoga Springs.

Charlene Hewlett has a close relationship with her 22-yearold daughter and her daughter knows her parents believe in her and will be there if she needs them. When first diagnosed with anxiety as a teen, Hewlett encouraged her “not to let her anxiety keep her from living her best life.” Her daughter fulfilled her goal of traveling around Europe after graduation and is waitressing while researching graduate schools.

When her daughter was gripped by depression while in college, Hewlett drove the two hours from their Warren County home to comfort her and provide redirection. For tunately, her daughter kept seeing her therapist and taking her medications. Not all young adults with mental illness are as compliant. 71 

While most parents naturally worry about their children, regardless of their ages, Hewlett says, “I need to have con fidence in her and trust that she’s going to continue to stay the path. I can’t hold her hand forever.” She learned from her own experience losing both her parents 11 weeks apart the importance of looking forward, she says. Her daughter “ran a half marathon a few months ago. Now she’s thinking about running a full marathon. She’s setting big goals so she has something positive to focus on.”

While her daughter is in a good place now, Hewlett says she learned the value of setting goals while earning her de gree. “No goal is too big or too small. Getting out of bed on a bad day can be a goal to feel good about,” she says. “If you are in that really low place, that’s all your goal needs to be.”

If parents and their adult children live in the same place, Trudeau-Brown advises starting the conversation with a hug and making eye contact. Don’t ask a lot of questions, she says. Acknowledge that you see them struggling and tell them you’re there for them if they need you. For those whose adult kids live elsewhere, she suggests parents ask an open-ended question such as, “I was wondering what you’re up to and if you need anything.”

Either way, she recommends parents attend support groups such as those offered by the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), receive individual therapy for them selves, and consider family therapy, if their adult kids agree. You’re in a better position to think clearly if you make time to care for your own mental and physical health.

When Trudeau adopted her son at 10 months old, the single mother knew he faced health challenges. She considers herself lucky her son received a diagnosis as a child, so he had already learned that taking his medication made him better.

After graduating from a special school, he volunteered there as a peer mentor, but Trudeau says she has not been able to find appropriate work programs for adults with disabilities. He lives with her and helps with chores, earning a monthly allowance. She has learned to prioritize when to intervene, asking herself whether it’s a matter of her son’s safety, some thing important such as personal hygiene and completing his household chores, or things she just has to let go of.

“Try to separate what you want from your kid from what you need from your kid. That has been my driving philos ophy all along. It’s not about you. It’s about them,” Trudeau says. “Try to stay connected as best you can. You’ve just got to hope at some point they’re going to come to the realization you’re not trying to control them.” n

7Things $ocial You May Not about $ecurity Know

Back payments, parents’ benefits and how to get your questions answered

BY CHRIS HARRIS

So, you’ve busted your hump for decades and now, retirement is fi nally on the horizon. That means it’s time to start preparing for your postwork life. Part of that planning will inevi tably involve decisions about your Social Security benefits, including the best time to start collecting them. The choices you make will directly impact your future, so the more you know going into the pro cess, the better off you’ll be.

“There’s lots of misinformation out there in the general public as well as the media about Social Security,” says Ben Stump, public affairs specialist for the New York Region of the Social Security Administration, adding that you’re never too young to start prepar ing for retirement. With that in mind, here are five things you should know about Social Security before even thinking about filing for those benefits.

1CREATE A PERSONALIZED ACCOUNT NOW

Stump recommends all covered workers create a personalized account on the SSA website. “Anyone can create one, no matter their age, and it provides

a breakdown of what you’ve earned and what benefits you would receive,” Stump says. “I check mine once a year, so if there’s ever a discrepancy in my earn ings, I can see it in real time, and make sure what’s on my W2 matches what was posted for last year’s earnings.”

The benefits you receive after retire ment will be based on a calculation us ing your highest 35 years of earnings. “When you retire, you really want to make sure they have the correct earnings amounts to gauge your best 35 years,” Stump says. “Sometimes, it’s hard to fix someone’s earnings record when mis takes are made, especially if they were made during the 1980s or ’90s.”

2WAIT, BUT NOT TOO LONG

Everyone knows you should try to wait until you’re fully vested before filing for Social Security. But Stump says don’t wait too long. “Any covered worker can choose to retire anywhere between age 62 and age 70,” he explains. Those that retire at 62 re ceive less monthly in Social Security payments than those who wait until 65 or 67—what the SSA deems “full retirement age.” Stump says that after

67, those who remain in the workforce will receive “delayed retirement cred its” (translation: increased benefits) for each month they work up until their 70th birthday. “I have seen peo ple come in past age 70 to file for their benefits, and they stopped receiving those extra credits at age 70,” Stump says. “Essentially, they lost benefits just because they didn’t come in when they should have.”

3RETROACTIVE BENEFITS ARE POSSIBLE

Stump says workers who do make the decision to delay filing for their benefits upon reaching full retire ment age, in order to take advantage of those delayed retirement credits, can change their minds at any time, at which point “they can apply and be paid for up to six months of retroactive benefits” in one lump sum, he says.

The SSA does not, however, pay ret roactive benefits for any month prior to full retirement age, or beyond six months in the past. “This can take some pressure off people when deciding the best time to file, because they’re not locked into what may seem like a onetime decision,” Stump says. “Those who

initially choose to delay receiving retirement benefits at full retirement age have a six-month period to change their mind and receive all the benefits they would have received if they had chosen not to delay.” The lump payment can be thousands of dollars, depending on your earnings over the course of your career, so knowing this option exists can translate to a hefty one-time deposit once you do decide to take benefits.

4YOU CAN COLLECT BENEFITS FROM THE EX

So long as you and your ex-partner were married for more than 10 years, Stump says individuals can collect bene fits from the SSA based on their former spouse’s employment record. He notes that two years must have passed between the finalization of the divorce and the application for bene fits. The former spouse also must be between 62 and 70, “but not necessarily collecting,” says Stump. “And the amount the divorced spouse is collecting has no effect on the worker’s amount—what that ex should be getting, or what their cur rent spouses receive. It’s totally separate.”

5YOU CAN COLLECT AND CONTINUE WORKING

Stump says there is a common misconception that those who collect Social Security need to stop working. “That’s only if you collect early,” Stump explains. “If you col lect before 65, we sort of expect you to be retired.” But file after 65, “and there’s no limit to how much you can earn, and still get your Social Security benefits,” Stump says

6PARENTS’ BENEFITS: THEY EXIST

Stump says few people ever file for them, but parents’ benefits are real. According to Stump, any parent of a covered worker who is 62 or older and receives half of his or her income from that child “is potentially entitled to ben efits.” The benefits can even be split between two parents, he says. However, if a parent decides to remarry, they lose those benefits, he says.

7ADVICE AND HELP IS AVAILABLE THROUGH SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS

According to Stump, anyone who has questions about Social Security can get answers through the agency’s social me dia platforms, including Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube. “We have resources available for people who are planning for retire ment, as well as real people who respond to the comments.”

tump suggests posting a question in the comments of any SSA social media post and then wait. “It may take a day or two, but a real person will go there and answer your ques tion,” he says. “It is a great resource only a small amount of people are aware of.” Noting the amount of fake look-alike accounts on social media, Stump says the official SSA pages will include the agency’s seal. n is that acts on behalf of another person persons, putting their ahead of their own, with a duty to preserve good faith and trust.” ALL FINANCIAL ADVISORS ARE

BY ROD MICHAEL

Italy…or Bust!

This summer our family took the trip of a lifetime to Italy. We had planned this trip years ago so it was so wonderful to finally depart for Europe.

Experiencing the beauty of Italy with the love of family around you is an experience beyond words. We stayed with friends of my daughter-in-law in a part of Tuscany that many people do not get to experience. They own and run to perfec tion a bed-and-breakfast, and we could not have enjoyed bet ter hosts. The architecture of the village of Campiglia is beyond words and their hospitality made us feel like family. We sampled lovely cooking and enjoyed some local bianco and rosso vino.

Every day the five of us, as well as local residents, would carefully wend our way down the winding stoned streets to the Piazza Della Repubblica, the local town square. We would all sit, sip drinks, enjoy appetizers and fill our souls with happiness. Joining the locals every day was a wonder ful experience. The sky was always filled with sunshine and swifts, birds that migrate each year from Africa to raise a new family. The town is a getaway spot even for those who live elsewhere in Italy and once there, you truly understand why. We were the only Americans in the village and truly immersed ourselves in Italian culture.

Day trips to the countryside and interactions with the lo

cal people were wonderful, as was the cuisine. Many places left us speechless. We bathed in the ocean and spent a love ly afternoon in a mineral bath. The museums and churches house some of the greatest artistic treasures in the world and experiencing the genius of the hands of Michaelangelo in person was chilling. What perfection. To stand that close to something he created is truly breathtaking.

On a trip like this you are on the go every day and we truly did not have enough time to see it all. We all came away with a different appreciation for life and a memory that we get to share. That is what a multigenerational vacation is all about. We saw the visions and handiwork of geniuses and created our memories amongst those masterpieces.

It was a perfect trip that I got to spend time with my beau tiful wife, wonderful son and daughter-in-law, and my awe some grandson. To my family I say thank you for the mem ories—and to my newfound Italian friends I say, Grazie! n

Above, from left: Rod Michael is pictured on his family’s travels in and around Tuscany, with grandson Luke, daughter-in-law Alison, and son Chris. Second photo from right is his wife Phyllis with Luke at the family’s last stop, the Calidario Terme Etrusche resort and spa in Venturina Terme.