PEARLS OF WISDOM: Money Talks

For many, the subject of money carries a certain stigma in social settings, especially when discussing income, retirement savings or other personal financial details. The taboo, plus intimidation or embarrassment can prevent us from talking about money and improving our circumstances. As wages continue to stagnate and the income gap continues to widen, talking and learning about money is crucial for change.

Although there are good intentions behind avoiding the topic, not talking about money can put people at a disadvantage when it comes to financial wellness— especially women. By being open to conversations about money, you can put yourself in a position to be even better informed about financial matters and pay those skills forward. Here are five reasons to start talking about money:

1. Learn helpful budgeting tools and tricks.

The more comfortable you feel discussing topics like retirement plans, student loans and budgeting, the more opportunity you have to learn from each other. From learning about a helpful mobile app or online budget calculators to practical savings tips for a major purchase, learning how your friends manage their money can be incredibly insightful. A simple question like asking how your friend keeps track of thier monthly spending is a great way to start the discussion. Not every strategy your friends use will work for you, but the discussion will help you both be more educated about financial matters.

2. Take aim at the glass ceiling.

Income transparency—especially with others in your job field—lets you know where you stand relative to other industries and empowers you to negotiate for a higher salary. Talking about income—even if you aren’t comfortable referencing exact numbers—with friends, family and even a close coworker, can help you make a strong case for higher pay or a push to look for a different job.

3. Hold yourself accountable.

Sticking to a budget isn’t always easy—especially when it comes to resisting temptation of eating out or charging too much on your credit card while shopping with friends. If you're struggling to save—or even make ends meet—set and be up front with your financial goals. If your friends invite you out for happy hour, simply let them know you're cutting out restaurant cocktails for the next three months so you can meet said goal, such as paying off your student loans or saving a down payment for a car. By being honest, your friends will be less likely to put pressure you to go out—and they may even help you find budget-friendly ways to have fun.

4. Know where you stand.

While there are some definite financial benefits to sharing expenses with another person, fighting about money can make or break a relationship. Nearly 25 percent of divorced couples ages 25–44 cite money as the primary reason. Unexpected spending habits, disproportionate amounts of income or debt and navigating shared expenses can lead to hard feelings—and sometimes even feelings of unfairness or distrust. Full transparency and setting mutual goals with your partner will help you get on the same page, prepare for unexpected expenses and build a foundation for healthy conversations surrounding finances. Consider keeping a shared spreadsheet of login credentials to household bills, financial statements and account balances. This will allow you both the necessary info should one of you become incapacitated. Start talking about money early—don't wait until the U-Haul is outside ready to move you in together! While it may seem weird to launch into a financial quiz on the third date, asking questions such as "When do you see yourself retiring?" is a fun conversation starter that can help you navigate deeper conversations when the time is right.

5. Be prepared.

Regardless of age or health, a time will come when difficult decisions will need to be made. Whether it's caring for aging parents, an unexpected medical diagnosis or loss of employment for you or your partner, the weight of these scenarios will be magnified if you don't have access to the information you need. Nearly 70 percent of seniors will require some type of long-term care service as they grow older so it is important to discuss early and understand who will provide the care and how it will be paid for. Having financial conversations with your spouse, partner, children or parents now will be easier than during a time of crisis.