Arbor Vitae - Twenty-sixth Edition

MEDICAL AFFAIRS

WORLD ISSUE

CREATIVITY

Nightmare: What Have We Known?

How COVID-19 is Hurting The World Economy

Check out wonderful digital illustrations, poems, and intriguing short stories!

26th Edition/March 2020

THE OFFICIAL MAGAZINE OF AMSA-INDONESIA

D

uring all stages of sleep, the mind and brain are working to process new memories, consolidating them into long-term storage and integrating recently acquired information with past experience.

They are an enduring source of mystery for scientists and psychological doctors. Why do dreams occur? What causes them? Can we control them? What do they mean?

Much that remains unknown about dreams. They are by nature difficult to study in a laboratory, but technology and new research techniques may help improve our understanding of dreams.

Although some researchers believe dreams are just a byproduct of sleep, others think dreams are important for memory consolidation or conflict resolution. There are several theories about why we dream. Are dreams merely part of the sleep cycle, or do they serve some other purpose?

The third Arbor Vitae on this tenure is finally released with the theme “The Secret Life of Sleep: Unraveling the Mystery of Dreams”. Find all the information about this issue in Current Medical Affairs. Don’t forget to check the #AskTheReader Section to know who is the winner of the previous quiz! We also introduce “Creativity” Section on this edition and have gotten a lot of positive response!

Please check out wonderful masterpieces including digital illustrations, poems, and short stories created by AMSAIndonesia’s members!

We would like to thank every contributor of this edition.

You guys are all awesome and full of ideas! Keep inspire and share your thoughts through this magazine!

I hope you guys are excited as I am. Enjoy reading!

Best Regards,

Ignatius Evan Santosa Editor-in-Chief

26TH EDITION | MARCH 2020

Ignatius Evan Santosa Editor-in-Chief Elisa Wulur Medical Affairs Editor

Rani Permata Creativity Editor

Prasista Ariadna Kusumadewi World Issue & Creativity Editor

Pierre Harold Aristo Creativity Editor

Amelia Minarfah Music Editor

Raina Maharani Tasyandita Photography & Creativity Editor

Nadya Halida Creativity Editor

Michelle Putri AMSA Events Editor Rani Permata Cover Illustrator

Get in touch with us!

Jeanette Sefanya Yefta AMSA-Universitas Kristen Krida Wacana

Ester Septalyna AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Michelle Gracella AMSA-Universitas Jambi

Diah Lubis AMSA-Universitas Jambi

Alifa Hasna R. Fachly AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Anastasiabella Christophilla AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Matthew Guillaume AMSA-Universitas Gadjah Mada

Vanny Shafiera AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Yuliana Bernadetha Patangke AMSA-Universitas Hasanuddin

Galuh Mahendra AMSA-Universitas Gadjah Mada

CONTRIBUTORS

Barii Ikraam Majiid Ahmad AMSA-Universitas Tarumanagara

Kasilda Pasha AMSA-Universitas Hang Tuah

Stephanie Kurnia AMSA-Universitas Sriwijaya

Sandy Hasan AMSA-Universitas Sriwijaya

Anis Rohmasari AMSA-Universitas Padjadjaran

Josephine Alicia Bierhuijs AMSA-Universitas Tarumanagara

Claudia Valoryn Iona Rombe AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Elsie Levina Aisha AMSA-Universitas Trisakti

Cyndi Christina AMSA-Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Nadya Intan Alyssa AMSA-Universitas Trisakti

CONTRIBUTORS

Dewi Permata AMSA-Universitas Muhammadiyah Malang

Michelle Joshalyn Natasha AMSA-Universitas Kristen Krida Wacana

Dhea Anisa Yuri Lubis AMSA-Universitas Jambi

Giovanna Renee Tan AMSA-Universitas Gadjah Mada

CONTRIBUTORS

CONTENTS

MEDICAL AFFAIRS Lucid Dreams: A Medical Perspective Nightmare: What Have We Known?

Let’s Sleep & Explore the Dreamland

WORLD ISSUE MUSIC Monsta X’s All-English Album: All About Luv Love Song For Earth Selena Gomez’s Comeback: Song Lyrics That Represents Her Heart Kenangan Manis Permulaan Tempat Kembali

How Covid-19 Is Hurting the Global Economy

PHOTOGRAPHY

CREATIVITY

DONE

MINDS Surya Misery Fine.

Deprivation

AMSA EVENTS Tamasya Budaya 2020 Build The Sense AMSA-UKI 2020

Deep-dark red.

Wildest Dream Manifestasi Masa BMW E28 M5 and Lil Spaceship Unknown; Half of Our Hopes How a Dream Saved My Life Malam Ini E A Journey Lost

by Matthew Guillaume AMSA - Universitas Gadjah Mada

T

he global economy has been steadily growing over the past few decades.

According to the International Monetary Fund, the world economy, comprising 193 economies, in 2019 is projected around US$86.60 trillion. The global economy has expanded from US$11.39 trillion in 1960 to US$82.63 trillion in 2018, a 7.25x increase.

China, a large contributor to global economic activity over the past few decades, has experienced exponential growth ever since it broke the barriers of its old centrally-planned

closed economy and evolving into a manufacturing and exporting hub to the world.

Often referred to as “The World’s Factory” given its huge workforce in manufacturing. Back in 1980, China was the world’s seventh-largest economy, with a GDP of US$305.35 billion.

Since its market reforms in 1978, the Asian giant has seen economic growth averaging 10% annually. In recent years, however, the growth of China has since then decelerated but remains relatively high compared to its neighbouring peers.

Covid-19 or the novel coronavirus disease outbreak that originally started in China is ravaging through countries, damaging local economies and, as a whole, the global economy. The disease first came to light when patient zero was reported by health officials at Wuhan, China on the 31st of December 2019 and since then, the number of cases reported has skyrocketed. Origins of the virus have been pinpointed to a wet market in Wuhan, China and have since then spread across the Chinese mainland and over 100 countries in the world, including 1 international conveyance.

Based on data from the World Tourism Organization, China has been the largest contributor to overseas tourism expenditure at about 16% which totals at around $180 billion. However, because of recent travel bans and flight cancellations put in place since the emergence of the new coronavirus.

The UN’s International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) predicts that Japan could lose $1.29 billion of tourism revenue in the first quarter because of the drop in Chinese travellers, while Thailand could lose $1.15 billion. The outbreak has also impacted airline carriers across the globe as the airline stock market has dropped by 30% as fears of mass customer defection in part to the new coronavirus disease outbreak. A prolonged outbreak of this virus is projected to worsen many airline companies globally.

In the trade sector, China is the largest importer of commodities such as iron ore, soybeans, electronic parts such as integrated circuits and oil. The Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OAPEC) and its allies including Russia have considered the possibility of cutting total oil production

because of diminishing demands caused by the recent outbreak. The demand for oil is expected to fall by 435,000 barrels year-on-year in the first quarter of 2020, making it the first quarterly contraction in over 10 years. Huge importers of China such as Japan and the U.S has seen significant reductions in imports. This is caused by the shortages in products and parts from China as factories have delayed production after the Lunar New Year and advised workers to stay home in a bid to help reduce the spread of the virus.

Apple’s manufacturing partner in China, Foxconn, is facing production delays.

Several carmakers including Nissan and Hyundai have temporarily ceased productions outside China because they couldn’t get parts. The pharmaceutical industry is also experiencing disruptions to global production. Besides that, many trade shows and sporting events in China, Asia and across the world have been cancelled or postponed.

Currently, Covid-19 daily infections within China have decreased compared to last month. However, infections in other parts of the world have only either begun or skyrocketed reaching peak levels. Many countries such as Japan, South Korea, and Italy have reached an economic slump and more countries are projected to follow.

A prediction by Bloomberg states that if China can quickly get the outbreak under control, and factories rumble back to life by the second quarter of 2020, the impact on the rest of the global economy could be mitigated. Failure, however, is predicted to result in an economic recession as the world’s biggest economies suffer a slowdown as they struggle to contain the domestic spread of the virus. The best thing the world can hope for now is the effectivity on the containment of the spread and the quick development of a vaccine.

Tamasya Tamasya Budaya Budaya 2020 2020

Written Written by: by: Galuh Galuh Mahendra Mahendra [Universitas [Universitas Gadjah Gadjah Mada] Mada]

Tamasya Budaya, atau disingkat TamBud, adalah program tahunan dari divisi Art and Culture, divisi yang hanya ada di AMSA-UGM. TamBud kali ini diadakan pada 29 Februari 2020 di Desa Wisata Pentingsari, Sleman dan diikuti oleh 48 peserta dari berbagai divisi AMSA-UGM. Kegiatannya meliputi belajar menari tari Gambyong, memainkan gamelan, dan membuat janur sederhana.

Pertama-tama, peserta dibagi menjadi 2 kelompok besar. Kelompok pertama belajar menari dan kelompok kedua belajar gamelan selama setengah jam. Setengah jam berikutnya, mereka bertukar tempat dan kegiatan. Setelah itu, semua peserta bersama-sama belajar membuat janur sederhana berbentuk pedang.

Acara ini bertujuan untuk mengenalkan budaya setempat, khususnya kebudayaan Yogyakarta, kepada member AMSA-UGM yang berasal dari berbagai daerah di Indonesia. Selain itu, kegiatan ini juga bertujuan agar peserta saling mengenal satu sama lain dan semakin akrab dengan diadakannya games setelah makan siang.

Di penghujung acara, semua peserta berfoto bersama. Acara selesai pada pukul 14.00, ditutup dengan turunnya hujan lebat. Seluruh peserta pulang dengan gembira.

Build The Sense AMSA-UKI 2020 Written by: Vanny Shafiera & Anastasiabella Christophilla [Universitas Kristen Indonesia]

Waktu begitu berharga ketika kita bercengkrama dan mengurai keceriaan namun begitu sia-sia ketika kita tidak dapat bercengkrama dalam kebersamaan. Seperti itulah analogi kebersamaan.

Membahagiakan ketika bersama namun rapuh ketika berpisah.

AMSA-UKI merupakan organisasi yang dapat mengajak member-membernya untuk turut berpartisipasi aktif dalam kegiatan-kegiatan di AMSA-UKI. Dengan tujuan mempererat hubungan antara member baru dengan member lama, AMSA-UKI mengadakan kegiatan Build The Sense dengan tema “THALASSOPHILE-through solidarity and share happiness together� yang diadakan pada tanggal 1-2 Februari 2020 di Mutiara Carita Cottages, Anyer.

Untuk persiapan mobilisasi menuju lokasi acara, para anggota-anggota AMSA-UKI berkumpul terlebih dahulu pada jam sepuluh pagi di AMSA-UKI. Lalu, BTS dibuka secara resmi pada jam tiga sore di Mutiara Carita Cottages, Anyer diawali dengan sambutan dari dr. Louisa Ariantje Langi, M.Si., M.A, selaku WADEK III Fakultas Kedokteran Universitas Kristen Indonesia, Ida Romasta Novyanti, selaku representative AMSA-UKI serta Dimas Hafizh Mahendra, selaku ketua acara dari BTS AMSA-UKI 2020. Setelah acara pembuka selesai, para panitia mengadakan pembagian kamar dan kelompok dengan yel–yel terbaiknya masing-masing.

Acara dilanjutkan dengan sharing session bersama AMSA-Indonesia tentang pengalaman-pengalaman selama di AMSA-Indonesia yang diwakilkan oleh Jason Phowira, Christina Wunardi, serta Ignatius Evan Santosa. Usai sharing session, diadakan ISHOMA dan makan malam.

BTS dibuka kembali dengan sharing with senior session, dimana semua anggota AMSA-UKI, baik para senior maupun yang baru, duduk berdampingan membentuk lingkaran dan sharing tentang pengalaman masing-masing di AMSA-UKI dengan harapan untuk memberikan semangat melalui

Malam di hari pertama setiap member akan dibentuk dalam kelompok untuk menunjukkan bakat-bakat mereka melalui talent show. Diacara talent show tidak hanya member baru saja yang turut berpartisipasi namun, member lama juga turut berpartisipasi dalam kelompok tersebut yang membuat suasana semakin menyenangkan. Acara talent show diadakan bersamaan dengan api unggun yang membuat suasana semakin hangat. Waktu yang paling menyenangkan adalah saat kita bercengkrama, menjaga hangatnya kebersamaan dan menggulirkan banyak waktu dalam keceriaan.

Diacara talent show banyak penampilan-penampilan menarik yang diajukan kepada member baru seperti drama, bernyanyi, dan masih banyak penampilan lainnya. Setelah talent show setiap member akan menulis wish mereka dalam kertas dan ditempelkan di lampion lalu diterbangkan secara bersamaan. Wish tersebut diterbangkan bersama lampion dengan harapan impian-impian setiap member akan membawa harapan ke langit untuk dikabulkan dan meningkatkan semangat setiap member untuk dapat menggapai mimpi-mimpi yang lebih tinggi lagi.

Di hari ke 2 sebelum games dimulai peserta dapat bersantai menikmati deburan ombak serta angin pantai yang sejuk sambil bercengkrama dengan peserta lainnya. Disinilah yang awalnya hanya pernah melihat, pernah mendengar menjadi tahu dan menjadi dekat satu sama lain.

Peserta juga akan bermain games yang tentunya sangat seru dan menguji kekompakkan antar kelompok. Setiap kelompok akan dicampur dengan angkatan senior dan junior agar menciptakan hubungan yang erat antara senior dan junior dan juga untuk bersenang-senang dan melatih untuk bekerja-sama. Kenapa harus bisa melatih kerja-sama? Karena kelak ketika menjadi seorang dokter kita merupakan teman sejawat yang akan terus bekerja-sama dalam situasi apapun, serta menjadikan teman sejawat adalah keluarga.

Kebersamaan dapat membuat kita bekerja lebih efektif dan efisien seperti itulah teman sejawat yang saling bahu-membahu meningkatkan semangat sesama teman sejawat untuk melayani masyarakat dengan baik dan dapat bekerja lebih baik lagi. Kebersamaan itu indah melebihi apapun. Seperti pada tujuan dari Build The Sense yaitu menciptakan kebersamaan sehingga menjadikan keluarga. Di games tersebut peserta akan lebih mengenal satu sama lain. Yang mulanya hanya sebatas pernah melihat, pernah mendengar, menjadi tahu, menjadi dekat, peduli satu sama lain dan menjadi sebuah keluarga.

Acara penutupan serta coffee break dimulai pada jam 11.30, lalu dilanjutkan dnegan pengukuhan anggota secara resmi serta pembagian divisi anggota-anggota baru ( rincian anggota-anggota baru terdapat pada gambar di atas ) setelah itu seluruh anggota AMSA-UKI foto bersama.

Pada jam 12 siang, semua peserta dan kepanitiaan mobilisasi bersama-sama kembali pulang.

DEPRIVATION DEPRIVATION

By Kasilda Pasha Devanda

WI LDEST EST D DREAM RE AM WILD

By Josephine Alicia Bierhuijs

BM W E28 E28 M5 M5 AND AND LIL LIL BMW SPACESHI P S P ACESHI P

By Nadya Intan Alyssa

Assalamu’alaikum Wabarakatuh

Warrahmatullahi

D

o you know, what love is? Love is a feeling that is conveyed by the heart through talking mouth that talks and becomes the deepest bond.

But, my story could not be finished smoothly, and only to the extent of the heart needed, and still holding on to everything. Yes, how am I? Love is not just for a partner but it can also be against, whether to your Lord, His Messenger, your parents, your friends, and even the closest people you don’t know.

by Dewi Permata

Yes, this is my love story when I go to college, I am a child who does not know what the department I chose, the department that many students want, the most sought-after prospective senior candidates, hehehe When I listened to the results if I was accepted, I was very happy, remembering that I was also very accepting, it was indeed their choice and my goal to enter the faculty. After hearing the announcement, I immediately left from my hometown for the cold city. The city for me is small, I want to go there.

Finally, I was able to go there to pursue the ideals that I longed for since childhood. My story starts when I want to be a college student.

The love story starts from the time of the chairman election until the time he chooses someone else who is more in line with his criteria.

Being a restaurant, fun is easy.

Yes, it must pass first, heheheh. C’mon what’s the name? Yes, PESMABA. PESMABA (New Student Participant) is the initial sequence before becoming this university. My PESMABA started very well, because I met great friends and wanted to fight together at this PESMABA.

Well, maybe he didn’t know my previous feelings for him.

How does he not know I like him. I can only go through feeling without permission. Yes, only through prayer to Allah SWT, love in prayer.

Yes, this is my love story when I entered My love story begins at the election college. of a new class leader. During the election, we decided to close our eyes and bow Thank you for your attention. our heads and those who want to be the Wassalamu’alaikum Warrahmatullahi chair of the force must raise their hands. Wabarakatuh Yes, moving on we do not know who wants to ask the leader of our force, and who wants to be responsible in the chair of our force.

At that time, there were some students who agreed to become the leader of our generation. Yes, my friend who was chosen and who became my love story, heheheh. Love story of prospective students who are not well known, hehehe.

Who do you think? Is the new generation leader or just a candidate, hehehe. Well, answer that is the leader of our new generation. Yeah, love blossomed at PESMABA here, heheheh Yes, honestly I don’t know why I like him, maybe because he wanted to be responsible in our generation or he is a very innocent person who wants that much responsibility. But, you could say it’s my answer.

by Stephanie Kurnia AMSA - Universitas Sriwijaya

ELORA POV

‘Where am I?’ ‘Why am I here?’

‘Where is everybody?’

Those are my first question who come to my mind when I open my eyes. I think I need to see this city.

Maybe I need to explore and maybe I can meet someone that I can ask to. Ah, here we go. I found someone in the music store.

‘Well, who is this guy?’

‘Why he is the only one here in this lonely world?’

Ah maybe it’s better if I ask him directly.

DIALOG “Excuse me, do you know where I am?”

“Ah you must be new in here. Hello I am Sean. Nice to meet ya. Finally I can meet someone new here. God must be kind to me haha” “Pardon? What do you mean?”

“Well, I believe that God has sent someone to accompany me while I am here in this lonely world.

I know that you already walk through into this city, right?”

“Yes, I do. Can you tell me where I am? What do you mean dude I am serious now. Don’t you dare to do something to me. I mean it.”

“Well, relax! I don’t even know exactly what happen with me to as well. It’s been 2 hours since I came here btw. Who is your name girl? Maybe it is our destiny to meet each other in here.”

“Well, I’m Elora. I think we’re in the same situation now haha. Sorry for being rude earlier. I need to survive for myself in this unknown world.”

“Yeah me too El, maybe we can figure it out later.

Wanna go around?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Why did you come to this music store?”

“Well, I just trying to find something at least for helping me to figure it out about the reason about this city.”

“Hahaha. I must say that you have a good spirit El. You know exactly how to figure it out the problem.”

“Good to hear and meet you Sean. Why were you in the music store?”

“I love music that much. I believe, music can save all the memories. Not just the good one but also the bad one. And when I know that I will be here for a long time, all the things that I wanna do is remembering them. At least I know that I won’t be alone here. I will think that their soul is in me right now. You must be thinking that I am too freak, mustn’t you?”

“Well, to be honest, I don’t think anything about you.

Besides, I think that I need to learn something from you dude. I like the way your thinking.”

“SERIOUSLY? You’re the one who say it and you make me surprised. Really.”

“Maybe we can tell to each other about our story then.

Maybe we can make the time go faster and we can solve and go from here then.”

“What a good idea haha.”

“Well, let’s start from you then, Sean” “Okay. I am Sean, I am the freelancer. I can pick all the job that I wanna take. I always love how the freelancer works.

We can decide everything that we want and we can focus on what the thing that we do.

Ya sometimes, it’s pretty hard for me for collecting money but I have my own principle.

You may feel hard on your financial thing, but you have to put your mental health first above everything. That is the reason why I decide to take the freelancer as my job.”

“Wow. You must be good at managing your financial then?”

“I can’t say it haha. You have to ask that question to someone else haha.”

“So, why do you in that music store?”

“Well just like I said earlier, I love music so much. I spent my whole time to listen to the music especially when I need to work or maybe in the ride.

For me, music is representing something from our soul and it save a memory in it. I can remember that the song from Carpenters, Close to Me, do you know that song?”

“Woah, that song is legend dude. They long to be close to you” “You’re right! That song is reminding me with my father.

We used to sing it together in the past. That song also reminds me with my Senior

High School’s friend. We love that song because it is in the film.”

“Wow, your brain must be good Sean.”

“Well, I know and I am proud of it haha just kidding. Do you have memories in a song?”

“I don’t know for sure. But I think I have one. Do you know City of Stars from La La Land?”

“Of course! I love that movie so bad. I like the way how realistic the plot. What is the story behind that song?”

“Since I have been busy, I am wondering what is the purpose for me of doing this?

What can I get? Why do I keep doing this? Am I happy at doing this? And after I watched that movie, especially after hearing that song, it makes me think.

Maybe I need to find something to make me feel more energetic. I never need someone in my life. Even a friend. And I am wondering and waiting, when does the star will shine that bright in my life?

Can I be the stars in this dark night? And after hearing that song, I knew it that this song is really representing me.”

“Well, why don’t you take from the other prescription?”

“What do you mean?”

“Think out of the box. You know, you are wondering when you can be the stars in this dark night right? Why do you have to be the stars? Sometimes, we don’t need that stars to lighten up the dark night. Why don’t you became the moon which is big and not that shine, but can be shine when you know that it is the perfect time? I believe that someone has their own speciality and we can’t just push ourselves to something that not us.

Do you get it? I know that your day may be boring, but why don’t you take from another point of view?”

“Another point of view? What do you mean?”

“I mean, you can look at it from the other side. You may think that you always stuck on your work and you always think that it was the routines that you have to do. Ya you must to do it, but what about find something new like friends who will colour up your day? Or maybe a pet? Or you can go for a walk and meet someone new then?

And about the moon, to be honest, we are all the moon, we can’t be shine all the time. We have our own ability and speciality. And that’s the reason why we can be the moon. You don’t have to push yourself that hard and forget about your social life. You need to interact with others. You need to sun to improve and make yourself shine. Just like I do. Maybe you need someone to tell you that you are in the wrong way to achieve your goals. I don’t say that you don’t need to push yourself to the limit, but you need to remember there is someone who can help you. Don’t forget to interact with others.”

“Well, I never think about that. I just think that people always take an advantage from me and that’s why I always say to myself that I need to do this alone and get this done so, my goal can be fulfilled.

Thank you for reminding me Sean about what I need in my life.”

“Your welcome. You know what? I think we almost arrive at your stop El. Nice to meet you and I want you to remember this song, Hey Jude from The Beatles.

You better be sad, but don’t forget, you always someone’s shoulder to lean to.”

Hey Jude – The Beatles plays “Sean, what will happen with you?”

“Don’t worry, I’m always in your heart, El. You better go to that door El. Hurry up!”

Elora is walking through the door.

ELORA’S POV ‘Where am I?’ ‘What is happening now?’

‘Why everyone is crying?’

“Call the doctor, Elora is waking up! Hurry up!” someone say.

“Elora, you must be lucky. You’ve passed the critical period. Of the many cases like you, only 10% have regained consciousness. Maybe God has already given you a second chance to live.”

10 DAYS LATER WRITER’S POV “Mom, let’s go out somewhere, I am bored in here.”

“Okay darling, but you need to use this chair wheel, okay?”

“Okay mom.”

After passing through 4 rooms, Elora is seeing someone she pretty knew and Elora believe that he is someone important to her is in the critical period and the doctor is doing the CPR. ...

And then the monitor sounds flat. ...

Elora remembers. ...

He is Sean.

by Cyndi | AMSA - Universitas Kristen Indonesia

Dreams. A challenging subject to study, an enduring source of mystery and to this day, much remains unknown about it. There have been several theories as to why we dream, but the question remains. Are dreams merely part of sleep, or do they serve some other purpose? Some researchers believe that dreams are simply a byproduct of sleep, but for me, it is unquestionably, more than just that.Once upon a time, a dream saved my life.As a child, I had quite an active imagination.

I would dream frequently and vividly, and on top of that, I would also be able to remember them quite often. Occasionally, I could even pick what dreams I would have, much like choosing what to watch on Netflix.As I grew older, I started gaining more control over my dreams. I started becoming aware that I was dreaming while in a dream. I found that there were a few places in the “dream world” that were consistent. I also somehow move, think, do things faster and practically don’t feel pain. Time telling devices don’t work, faces are sometimes blurred, voices are somewhat muffled, but I can somehow recognize their meanings. I also can somehow return to save points, reset dreams and even exit the dream entirely.

But as awesome as it sounds, it’s quite the double-edged sword.

I’ve been on epic adventures, but I’ve also witnessed people’s deaths (which reminds me to appreciate that person even more while I still can). And even if I knew it’s just a dream, it sometimes felt so real at that moment. I still found myself getting carried away.

However, life is messy, and things fall apart. During a particularly bad bout of depression, I was plagued with frequent nightmares.

I would often wake up in tears, feeling awful like I haven’t even slept. This went on for weeks until on one of the nights, my nightmares peaked. That night, I saw a timer counting down.

I didn’t know what the timer was for, but I soon found out that it was a countdown to my end. When it hit zero, all of a sudden everything turned pitch black. I could feel myself being in a supine position, and I could see a glowing white orb from within me. Not long after, black swirls started appearing all over me.

I could physically feel my whole body completely locking up as if something was restraining me. I couldn’t move or talk, breathing got difficult, and my mind’s collapsing. I could hear a voice saying “just let me take you”, “you don’t deserve to be here anyway” and other horrible things. I honestly didn’t know what came over me, but I started fighting it. I forced myself to keep breathing, no matter how hard it got. I told the voice to go away with my mind. I told it I wanted to live.

I wasn’t sure how long everything lasted, but after struggling for quite some time, I suddenly felt as if I had been dropped from a hundred thousand miles above the ground. I jolt awake, in tears, in a cold sweat, but I didn’t die. I was still alive.

Of course, again, even in my dreams, I was too much of a coward to take my own life. I was undoubtedly miserable after that ordeal.

The night after, when I came to in the dream, I found myself in a place I’ve never been to before. The place itself wasn’t that well lit, but I could tell it was a pretty big room, and it looked quite deserted. The only light there was in that room was from a gigantic screen flashing some static in the center of the room. I walked closer to the center, approaching what seemed to be the control panel. The control panel itself was very dusty, but the thing that caught my eye was what looked like a palm scanner. As I wiped the dust off it, it began emitting a faint blue glow. I didn’t think too much about it, but I instinctively placed my right palm on top of it. It then made this beeping noise and out of nowhere a blindingly bright light shined on me.

When I opened my eyes, the room changed. It looked like a modern control room, and everything looks brand new. There were a lot of floating holograms along with a handy AI to guide me. It told me that I could try to “simulate” my life.

The first simulation I had it run was “what if I didn’t exist”.

When I opened my eyes, the room changed.

It looked like a modern control room, and everything looks brand new. There were a lot of floating holograms along with a handy AI to guide me. It told me that I could try to “simulate” my life.The first simulation I had it run was “what if I didn’t exist”.

In that simulation, I wasn’t there. In that timeline, both my parents were still together. They were happy together with their kids. At that point, I said something along the lines of “I guess it would’ve been better if I didn’t exist”. And the AI replied with “but you’ve already existed in this timeline, removing yourself from this will cause massive changes”. The AI then showed me a simulation in which I took my life, and God, it was excruciating to watch. I didn’t see how I took my own life, but I could feel their agony. My mom sat there, hysterical. My sisters refused to believe that I was gone. My friends were at a loss for words. I could tell they were all hurting. All because of me.

It’s as if even my subconscious is telling me not to take my own life. It’s trying to remind me that I have to keep going and not give up. And I have to say it’s doing a great job at it. That night, I swore to myself that I would never take my own life. I started getting the help I desperately needed. It definitely has been a rough ride, but here I am today, at a much better place, writing this as proof that sometimes, things do get better.

End.

Surya itu benci panas. Lihat saja dia, mengelap keringatnya, menatapku dari spion, saat kami terjebak macet di Jalan Kaliurang. Jakal. “Panas, Yak?“ dia bertanya sambil menyeringai. Di bawah teriknya matahari Jogja, keringatnya terlihat mengalir, bulir-bulir besar. Agak lucu Surya kepanasan di bawah matahari, yang merupakan arti namanya sendiri. Meskipun begitu, wajahnya yang bergaris tegas tetap terlihat bak Adonis. Aku bersembunyi dari teriknya matahari di balik bahunya, mendelik.

“Aku opo keliatan kayak lagi kedinginan, Sur?“ “Siapa tau, Yak. Marah-marah mulu,“ dia terkekeh.

Bibirku mengerucut, namun membentuk senyum. Kami baru saja makan diMcDonald dekat sini, dia ngidam makan burger jadi aku menurut saja.

Habis ini kami ada rapat. Aku punya rapat untuk kepanitiaan pentas di sekolah. Dia, akan rapat organisasi luar sekolah. Tadi aku mau langsung rapat saja, tapi kata dia, gak asyik kalo gak telat. Jadi lah kami makan dulu, ngobrol dulu ngalor-ngidul sampai akhirnya aku mulai merasa tidak enak kalau telat lebih dari ini.

Dari depan dia tertawa melihat wajahku, lalu menggenggam tanganku yang melingkari badannya.

“Pegangan, ya, Yak.“ Surya kalau naik motor itu ngebut banget ••• Aku benci durian. Surya tahu itu. Tapi dia nembak dengan pesta serba durian. Percaya atau tidak. Waktu itu, suatu hari bulan November, kelas dua SMA, dia pagi-pagi bawa durian. Ke kelas. Banyak banget. Lima, kalau tidak salah. Lalu tiba-tiba dia nyanyi lagu norak The Changcuters yang I Love You Bibeh. Norak banget. Lalu dia memberiku es krim durian.

Aku marah-marah, tapi tetap saja bersemu merah. Antara malu, senang, sama ingin muntah.

Opo (Jawa) : Apa Ngalor-ngidul (Jawa) : kemana-mana; tentang apa saja

Habis itu dia langsung menelpon Mama, katanya, “Tante, pinjam anaknya sebentar. Masuk rumah sakit karena durian, obatnya suruh jalan-jalan sama Surya.“ Aku tidak tahu Mama respon apa, yang jelas hari itu Surya berhasil bawa aku sampai ke Bukit Bintang. Aku sempat takut dimarahi Papa, tapi dia bilang akan sampai rumah pukul sembilan. Aku ingat waktu itu pukul setengah sembilan, dia masih main gitar di tengah restoran disana, menyanyi Love of My Life-nya The Queen.

Aku sempat berpikir, duh, pulang jam berapa?

Tapi dia bilang, “Tenang wae , Yak.“ Gitu.

Nah, ternyata emang Surya kalau naik motor itu ngebut banget. Sampai rumah aku juga masih ingat kalau Papa kaget liat anak perempuansatu-satunya diantar sama cowok. Tapi Surya langsung turun dari motor, parkir, salaman, lalu bilang ke Papa, “Pak, saya kira rumah Bapak di kahyangan, Pak. Ternyata bisa ya bidadari asalnya dari Prawirotaman?“ Papa suka banget sama Surya, karena Papa suka gombal.

Surya itu hobi banget nyari hantu. Gaktau kenapa. Katanya dia indigo.

Aku sih penakut dari janin, paling gakbisa ngurus hal-hal ghaib. Dia juga tau itu. Kebetulan sekolahku itu horornya minta ampun. Dia sengaja banget minta ditemani ke kelas, katanya ada barang ketinggalan.Malem-malem, habis ada kerja kelompok. Dia menggandeng tanganku, kalau ini mah aku senang-senang saja. Lalu tahu-tahu ada suara perempuan tertawa. Aku sudah deg-degan banget, gak kebayang kalau nanti ada yang tiba-tiba muncul.

Otakku bisa kebalik.

Namun Surya malah terkekeh, berhenti, menatapku.

“Kamu jangan dengerin.“ “Dengerin apa?“ “Itu setannya lagi nembak aku. Nanti kamu cemburu.“ Aku menatapnya tidak percaya.

“Ngawur e kamu, tu. Beneran ditempelin aku gaktau ya.“

Hari berikutnya dia tidak masuk, dong. Katanya sakit. Aku telpon Mamanya, kata Mamanya Surya ketempelan setan.

“Kamu punya kenalan orang pinter, gak?“ tanya Mamanya.

“Enggak, Tante. Yang saya kenal ya Surya itu, Tan. Coba, deh tanya Tan, pasti tahu setannya kenapa nempelin dia.”

Surya habis itu tertawa bilang kalau aku cemburu sama setan. Ya enggaklah. *** Surya itu matahari bagiku.

Rekor naik motor tercepat Surya adalah tiga menit dengan jarak 6 kilometer.Kecepatannya 120 km. Coba saja hitung. Surya ngebut karena hari itu aku jatuh dari motor. Aku jatuh 6 kilometer dari sekolah. Dalam waktu tiga menit, dia datang.Namanya emang Surya, ya, jadi saat dia datang, duniaku terang benderang. Aku lega banget. Aku merasa aman saat dia mendekat, wajah panik, lalu memegang pipiku. Ucapan pertamanya, “Aku ganteng, gak?“ Aku agak bingung harus jawab apa. Tapi aku mengangguk. Dia tertawa.

“Nah, ini Ayak kebentur kepalanya bisa ngomong Surya ganteng.”

Waktu itu dengan tangan berdarah-darah dan kaki keseleo, Surya bilang, “Makanya, Yak, kalo jatuh jangan ke aspal. Sakit. Jatuhnya mending kemana, Yak?“ Aku berpikir. Ini anak biasanya gombal.

“Hatimu, Sur?” “Ih, pede banget!” dia terbahak.

Aku mencibir. “Terus kemana?“ Dia bilang, “Hatiku, Yak.“ “Lah, bener dong?“ Aku protes.

“Salah, lah. Tadi kamu bilang kan ‘hatimu‘, bukan ‘ hatiku‘, ya kan?“ Meskipun kesal, aku cuma lega bisa bersandar di bahunya. ***

Waktu itu mau ujian nasional, aku duduk-duduk dengan Surya di pantai Parangtritis. Aku sempat protes karena tidak dibawa lebih jauh ke Gunung Kidul, tapi dia bilang, “Kok kamu pilih kasih sama pantai?”

Karena aku gakbisa jawab, aku menurut saja. Iseng, aku menanyainya kenapa dia kok menyukaiku.

“Eh, kamu merendahkan Suryatama Adibrata, ya?“ “Loh, kenapa?“ “Harusnya kamu tanyanya, kenapa aku mencintaimu, Yak. Suka itu untuk lelaki lemah tidak bisa komitmen.“Aku tertawa.

“Apa, sih, Sur! Kamu kayak mau ngelamar aja!“ Dia tidak tertawa. Aku menatapnya. Dia balas menatapku.

“Kamu kenapa, Yak,kok mau sama aku?“ Aku mengerjap. Kenapa, ya? Mau ngomong, emang butuh alasan? Tapi tadi aku juga nanya dia soal ini. Lagian klise banget kalo ngomong cinta gak butuh alasan. “Gaktau, Sur,“ aku menatapnya lekat-lekat.

“Tapi tiap kamu dateng tuh, tiba-tiba hidupku kayak terang, gitu Sur. Kayaknya namamu sangat berpengaruh ya. Surya. Matahari. Aku jatuh hati aja sama kamu tiap kali kamu ngomong dan hadir.“ “Berarti kalau aku lagi gak bisa nerangin kamu gimana dong?“ Aku menatapnya lagi.

“Tapi manusia selalu mencintai matahari bahkan ketika dia sudah tenggelam, kan?“ “Manusia. Kalo kamu, Yak?“ “Ya, sama. Kalo kamu ditelan naga, aku juga masih cinta.“ “Loh, kok jadi mitos Cina?“ dia terkekeh.

“Kamu masih penasaran gak kenapaaku cinta?“ “Masih, masih!“ aku tersenyum lebar. Kalau jawabannya Surya, aku harus siap-siap biar tidak terlalu bahagia. Nanti meledak.

Dia menatap jauh.

"Karena Ayak tulus," dia menatapku.

"Ayak suka sama Surya yang terik kering kerontang, gak adem kayak hujan."

Ayak nyengir.

"Hm, gombal."Surya hanya tertawa.

Semanis-manisnya Surya waktu itu denganku, kadang hidup berkata lain.

Hari ini Surya sedang tersenyum sumringah, masih terang seperti matahari, namun matanya bukan lagi bersinar untukku.Yah, kadang hidup memang begitu.aku menyelipkan amplop di kotak tamu, tulisannya besar Suryatama Adibrata x Marliana Dewi, lalu menerima es krim yang disodorkan padaku.

"Makasih, Mas," senyumku sambil menatap jemari lelaki yang dilingkari c incin yang sama denganku. Aku menarik napas. Kadang memang hidup begitu.

End.

Y R DIA

A Journey Lost By : Giovanna Renee Tan Under the shine of glittering constellations Sea waves beckon me to come, Follow the quivering needle of the compass I hold To a land which promises nothing more than an end, To an overdue journey I hold onto Though layers of mist blindfold my eyes, I cannot sleep on the hope of liberation For my ship is old and unloved Unfit to contain the vast dream I hold Sail on, To the island of whispered promises Of treasure or of condemnation I fear nothing, For I have exhausted everything for this vain journey Without a map, a crew, nor fresh water My ship sails soullessly through conviction

Fine By : Cyndi Everything’s gonna be fine There will be day after dark No matter how dark your night might be; Morning is yet to come Maybe there’s so many struggle People start to laugh at your dream Stop stressing over it Just let it be Keep doing your best And if you fall, Try again and again Keep on reaching to the top Shock them Sometime, It might be hard Just please Don’t stop.

Manifestasi Masa By: Elsie Levina Aisha Lourent

/ma•ni•fes•ta•si/ /maniféstasi/ n : Suatu perwujudan atau bentuk dari sesuatu yang tidak kelihatan. /ma•sa/ n : Waktu; ketika. ................................................................................................ /1/ Teruntukmu, 2020 paling ku tunggu Rintik hujan mulai turun di penghujung Desember di pergantian tahun 364 hari berkubang dengan rindu tapi tidak lebih buruk dari tahun lalu hal menarik terus muncul dari yang masih berkutat dengan sendu sampai ternyata bisa menemukan cara diri sendiri untuk bisa tersenyum

/2/ [Desember, Hujan, Petrikor] Datangmu diawal bulan itu, tanpa kata-kata Tanpa isyarat, praduga atau tanda Datangmu ibarat mendung yang di bawa oleh segumpal mega Sederhana dan tiba-tiba Lalu Kamu turun Enggan mereda Memaksa ku untuk kembangkan payung Berdansa dibawah derasnya basahmu Memaksa ku untuk menerima keadaan Bahwa seperti ini sungguh menyenangkan

Tidak lama, Kamu berakhir Pertanda bulan Desember mulai tersingkir Tidak ada merah, jingga, kuning dan yang lain Hanya tersisa genangan dengan penuh kenanga

Saat tepat pukul 00.00 nanti, akan terdengar riuh gembira dilengkapi berbagai warna-warni kembang api berhamburan diangkasa kesunyian yang biasanya terasa, hilang seketika diterpa banyak tawa yang menggema menggeletik telinga

Desember, Kamu, kini hanya menyisakan aroma petrikor Di setiap suduh ibukota Di lemari minimarket Di atap warung nasi bebek Di sela kursi bioskop yang sedikit robek Merata di seluruh bagian

Harap-harapku di tahun yang datang di januari yang akan terlangkah ada celah untuk bisa lebih kuat ada kesempatan untuk bisa lebih bahagia

Begitulah fase diri Sejak Januari yang penuh petir hingga bertemu desember yang penuh gemercik Banyak hikmah yang bisa di petik Banyak komitmen yang terbang terbawa angin, t menepati janji Penuh lika-liku yang pelik Hingga akhirnya membawaku di posisi seperti in Baik-baik, namun menginginkan jauh lebih baik

Semoga saja semua akan berganti Tak lagi berpeluk pilu Tak lagi berteman sendu dan semoga semua duka akan berlalu Terbawa jauh oleh angin berhembus lalu dibalikkanlah tawa dan canda dalam tiap hirup Tak lupa ku ucap terimakasih untuk tahun ini Terimakasih untuk yang sempat hadir, Mengajarkan hal-hal yang menyebabkan pedih Membuatku paham merintih karena perih Terimakasih pula untuk yang pernah singgah, Membuatku belajar bagaimana agar seseorang betah Agar diamnya tak mudah berpindah

Semoga, Injakku di Januari yang baru Dapat menguatkan seluruh bahu Yang begitu berat menopang amanat yang ditan Menjadi tahun yang di warnai gemuruh tawa buk Dan semoga, melesatnya kembang api di langit n Tepat pukul 00.00 Dapat menjadi simbol Bahwa seluruh kesedihan dan beban dapat ikut melesat jauh Sama seperti kembang api yang kita lepas utuh -

an

k air

tidak

ni k

nggung kan sendu nanti pergi

/3/ Manifestasi Masa

Aku memaknai tahun ini sebagai: pelajaran.

Setelah sempat sekarat, aku bangkit lagi Membawa pesan pengharapan, serta belajar kembali bersyukur Mungkin, tahun ini bukanlah tahun yang sangat berat untukku saja Melainkan kamu-kamu yang sedang membaca juga Memang, kian lama hari kian berat rasanya, semakin banyak guncangan dan hambatan Namun, dibalik semua itu, Aku dengan segudang keterbatasanku mencoba bangkit Menghalau gelisah dan putus asa Mencari makna emas yang terkubur dalam 2020, aku akan datang bergandeng tangan Berbekal makna didalam tempat makan Aku datang, tidak sendirian Aku datang dengan tambalan-tambalan luka, serta lebam di mata, juga senyuman setulus-tulusnya Mari, kita berdamai dulu Sebelum kau buka pintu, amatilah aku Betapa luka-luka itu sama sekali tidak membuatku jatuh Tahun baru, pegang janjiku; sekejam apapun hidup, aku akan tetap bangun -BakwanMidnight-

Hello!

Publication and Promotion Team AMSA-Indonesia 2019/2020 Amelia Minarfah Michelle Putri Rani Pertama Raina Maharani T. Prasista Ariadna K. Pierre Harold A. Elisa Wulur Nadya Halida

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CROSSWORD PUZZLE

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It is good to have an en but it is the journey th

nd to journey towards; hat matters, in the end.