Anaverde Magazine Volume I Issue II by Anaverde Magazine

Vol. I Issue II | November 2020

Choosing to

Love Your Body Eliminate Closet Odor for Good

Delightful Thanksgiving Recipes Everyone Will Enjoy

How This Pandemic Will Leave Us Forever Changed

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Contents

Vol. I Issue II | November 2020

Features

Letters to the Editor

Dealing with Messy Neighbors

12 16

Editor’s Picks

Book Recommendations That Add Value to Your Life

Night Frights

Helping Your Child Overcome Recurring Nightmares

34 55

Your Body

How to Feel Better About Your Temple

Just in Time for Thanksgiving

Stuffing Recipe That Won’t Disappoint

56 42

Time to Refresh Your Space Simple Techniques to Zap Funky Closet Odor

Black Friday Deals

Ways to Be Strategic on Your Hunt

A Time to Reflect

What the Pandemic is Teaching Us About Gratitude

42 4

Airport Travel During COVID-19

What Can You Expect and How to Plan

On the Cover:

In this issue, we take some time to reflect about the pandemic and what has changed in the lives of our Anaverde Magazine readers. The feature story reminds us to enjoy and appreciate the simple things now and forever. Photograph by Genor Chiomento

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Letter from the Editor Life altering situations have a way of quickly reminding you that things can change just like that. I have always heard that there is a silver lining in every situation. No. Matter.What! If something that is less than favorable happens to you, be still and look for the good because it is in there. That is exactly what happened to me. When there were no more distractions on my path to launching the magazine, it got launched. That was my silver lining. We were all required to stay home. Stay inside for a solid three months. That was exactly what I needed to buckle down and focus on bringing this publication to life. Mind you, the idea for Anaverde Magazine was born in 2018 but it did not come to pass until 2020.

rateful Now!

Cheers to the beauty of the seasons. I’ve come to appreciate just about all of them. There is something about fall and the Thanksgiving holiday. It is as if we are given that extra push to be grateful. At least that is what this time of year has always allowed me to reflect upon. Gratitude. Things to be grateful for. Looking at how good things really are. Even in the midst of the pandemic, there is so much to be thankful for. Having to wear a mask in public has really shown me how wonderful fresh breathing air is. Before the mask requirements, I enjoyed taking deep breaths throughout the day, it calms me. Now, I am reminded how good we once had it without having our breathing constricted with a covering over our nose and mouth. Grateful now. That is what I choose to focus on. As we enter into the Thanksgiving holiday, it is a good time to look around and acknowledge just how blessed we truly are. We are here! If you are reading this magazine, that means that you live in one of the most beautiful communities that I’ve ever known - Anaverde. I am so happy to call this place home. There is so much going on in this world and it is easy to get caught up in what is not going right but what about the things that are going well? That could be our focus. That has been my focus. You know, as I mentioned in last month’s letter, the magazine has been a passion of mine for some two years. A lot of back and forth. Making calls, talking to potential sponsors and advertisers. It seemed like I would never get the publication up and running. I would set a launch date only to watch it pass like the changing seasons.

Then COVID-19 hit and the world shut down. This is what helped me realize that we simply do not have forever to realize our dreams. March 2020 was my turning point.

Not only was it incredible to have the world slow down so that I could catch up to my vision, but it was also a gift to be with my family, uninterrupted. No more coming and going, running around to different events. We are at home. We can breathe a sigh of relief and relax even in the midst of chaos. Our home is our haven. The pandemic is still very present. The world has slowly opened up but things are not the same. I am not sure if they ever will be. One thing that I am sure of is that we get to be grateful now. The holidays really allow us to stop and reflect on joy. The truth of the matter is, we can do this at any time. It does not have to be Thanksgiving to be grateful. You do not have to wait until the holiday season to be in a good mood. Each day, you get to choose your mood and that comes from within, not from what is going on on the outside or what date the calendar says it is. You get to choose. That is your gift. This is the beauty of life. We all get to be grateful now. That is something that I will never take for granted...just like the ability to breathe fresh air, freely. This Thanksgiving holiday, whether you get to be with your family and friends around the dinner table or not, choose gratitude. Even if things are not exactly the way that you wish they would be, just know things could be a lot worse than what they are. We have so much to be thankful for. Pick one and focus on its goodness. You are so loved and it is my Thanksgiving wish that you will stop to feel the love that is all around you. It is there. You just have to focus your attention on it. Be grateful now. Happy Thanksgiving!

Malena Jackson

PUBLISHER Anaverde Magazine, LLC FOUNDER & EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Malena Jackson EDITORIAL Managing Editor: Lori Callaway Associate Copy Editor: Katie Johnson ADVERTISING SALES Chris Lewis DESIGN Layout & Art Design: Madison Reynolds Graphics: Rameshwar Chawla 38713 Tierra Subida Avenue #128 Palmdale, CA 93551 Tel: 661-463-8061 Visit us online: www.anaverde-magazine.com Anaverde Magazine (ISSN 2691-7009) is published monthly for the Anaverde Hills community. Please note that the advertisements in the magazine are paid for by the advertisers, which allows the magazine to be free to the residents of the Anaverde Hills community. Limit of one free copy per household. Additional copies may be purchased for $5.99 per issue. Visit the website to order additional copies or send an email to hello@anaverde-magazine.com to request additional copies. Unless specifically noted, no advertisers, products or services are endorsed by the Magazine. Editorial submissions are welcome. Anaverde Magazine copyright 2020. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without permission is prohibited.

Hey Anaverde Business Owners!

Your Ad Belongs Here! Call today to reserve your ad in next month’s magazine. 661.463.8061

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Letters to the Editor you can’t really catch the perpetrator.

My Yard is a Potty for Dogs Dear Anaverde Magazine! I don’t know how much more I can take. My house is the last house on the street and it seems to be the perfect place for dogs to poop. I’ve done everything that I can to get the word out, even posted it on the Nextdoor app with videos, nothing is happening. I really don’t understand why people would let their dogs poop in my yard and not clean it up. This is ridiculous and it is driving me crazy! What can I do? Please help. Tired of Dogs Pooping in My Yard, Ana K. Dear Ana, I totally understand your frustration with dog owners not picking up after their pets.. This one is a doozy because unless you are on alert 24 hours a day,

This is going to sound very callous of me but I am going to say it anyway. Just let it go. I know, I know, what in the world am I talking about? That is insane! Yes, it is. Seriously, life is challenging enough and now to have to deal with tracking down those who are letting their dogs relieve themselves in your yard will prove stressful. I can sense the stress in your tone while reading your letter. True, this is not fair to you and it is so disrespectful. I am a believer in whatever you give your energy to gets more power. Taking the time to create a sign could possibly exacerbate the problem. Take deep breaths and envision your yard free of dog poop. Focus on that. Even if dog poop is in your yard, just focus on your yard being free of it. Then, craft a plan on how you will handle the poop that is there. Will you go and clean it up once a month or will you allow it to naturally go away? Either way works. Whatever you do, stop posting it on Nextdoor, stop talking about it and just let it go. It is out of your hands. Focus your energy on a beautiful yard that is free of dog poop. This is your way of turning the other cheek to gain your sanity back. Life is too long to be running after folks trying to get them to do right by you. Let people do what they do and watch how things shift in your favor.

The Yard Filled with Weeds Next Door Dear Anaverde Magazine, As you may already know, we have a code here in Anaverde that clearly states that our yards are not to be infested with weeds. For some reason, my next door neighbor refuses to tend to their yard. It is such a bad look. I have called the HOA and complained. They assured me that they have sent letters asking my neighbor to clean up the yard. It seems to be getting worse. I believe that they are just ignoring the letters and possible fines. I really wish that they would take pride in their home and keep the yard looking nice. I do not like looking at that mess. How would you handle this situation with a neighbor if it were you? I wish to remain anonymous. Thanks in advance for your feedback. Dear Anonymous, I receive quite a few letters dealing with neighbor issues. The challenge is that many people forget that this is a community. All of us working together as a whole, makes Anaverde one awesome place to live. I get that not everyone is going to be on the bandwagon and we just have to let them do what they do. Similar to my previous response, just let it go. You did your part by reporting this issue to the Homeowners Association (HOA) and that is all that you can do. However, you could offer to clean up the weeds for them, but

then that would get weird. You don’t want to be stuck with this responsibility every month. Just tend to your yard and lead by example. Try not to have an attitude with the neighbors. When you see them, smile and say hello. Whatever you do, don’t try to “fix” the situation. We must remember that we live in this development and there are pros and cons to this living situation. Make sure that your yard is nice and clean. If it bothers you to look over at your neighbor’s house, then don’t look over there. Put your focus someplace else. My guess is that after a while, if they see that your yard is always nicely put together, it will encourage them to put more effort into sprucing up their space. That is my hope.

Help Me Understand the Angle of This Magazine Dear Anaverde Magazine, I just want to say that the magazine looks great and is really well done. I did take a look at the October issue and wondered why there are so many stories about families in there? Why aren’t you all covering the election or other issues that are going on in the world? The articles that I read seem to be very light. What is the angle of this magazine? An Inquiring Mind Wants to Know, Charles M.

Dear Charles, I am glad that you have taken the time to read the magazine. That means a lot to me and the team. You raise such a great point about the content that we curate for Anaverde Magazine. The angle of this publication is to uplift, educate and empower our readers. That means, we don’t share content that is not going to do one or all of those things.

creating healthy environments for their children. This positively impacts the next generation and we are all about that. This is the future and the future affects all of us. With that said, if you have any story ideas, please let me know. I am open and willing to take your ideas into consideration as long as they uplift, educate and empower our readers.

I worked in the newsroom for over 10 years and I can tell you that there was never any intent to uplift or empower anyone. It was all about the fear factor. What is going to scare you the most to watch or to read? I don’t like to play those kinds of games. We have enough going on in our lives. Why not have a publication that is a breath of fresh air, if you will? There is hard news and scary stories all around us. Anaverde Magazine is a safe haven for the community. I want you to look forward to receiving your magazine each month. In fact, I want you to carry your magazine around and share the good news that you find in the articles. The world moves so fast and it is easy to forget that there is so much good going on in the world. You have plenty of other ways to get the heavy news: the local paper, social media, local news, national news and so on. Personally, I don’t want any part of that. How is that going to help you? It is true, we do tend to lean heavily on a family focus. That’s more of my call because I want families to be uplifted, happy and

Letters to the Editor are for informational purposes only, do not constitute medical advice and are not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice or counsel of your physician, mental-health professional, or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. By submitting a letter, you are agreeing to let Anaverde Magazine use it in part or in full and we may edit it for length and/or clarity. Need Advice or Have Something to Share? Visit anaverde-magazine.com to submit your Letter to the Editor or send an email to hello@anaverde-magazine.com.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Editor’s Picks

Book Recommendations to Gift Yourself or Friends + Family

ave I ever told you how much I enjoy reading? Not just any type of reading. Self help, spirituality and business training books are my jam. Lately, I have grown to love memoirs and autobiographies. For me, it is like getting an honest inside view of the life that a public figure has lived. This month, I want to share with you some of my favorite books so far. The following titles will make perfect stocking stuffers for the holidays. In fact, if I were to do a holiday list, books would make up the majority of the gifts. Reading is such a great escape. Whether you are into fiction or nonfiction, I highly recommend getting lost in a good book.

for you. It felt like watching a movie from beginning to end. Crawford did an excellent job unveiling all that she went through with her best friend/ lover Whitney Houston. At some points, I felt saddened to learn about the struggles that Houston faced during her journey. It almost made me wonder if things would have been different had Houston been free to express her life in the way that she wanted to. Crawford shared how Houston felt the pressure to end their relationship because an openly gay superstar was not allowed during that era.

A Song for You: My Life with Whitney Houston by Robyn Crawford Penguin Publishing Group

grew up in the 80s and really admired watching Whitney Houston’s journey. Sure, as I got older, I followed all of the tabloid stories like everyone else. I also knew that there was a lot more to her story than what the news was reporting. With that said, Robyn Crawford, the author of this juicy memoir, did an excellent job of decoding all of the ups and downs that is Whitney Houston. If you followed or were ever interested in Houston’s rise to fame and her tumble down, then, this is the memoir

The story behind Houston’s iconic rendition of The Star-Spangled Banner was exactly the detail that I long for. I had to pause my reading and take a visit to YouTube just to relive the moment. Whitney Houston performs the national anthem at the 1991 Super Bowl. Photographs by George Rose / Getty

Crawford revealed that Houston had planned to wear a ball gown for that performance and decided to change her wardrobe right before hitting the field. These are the kinds of stories that make me love Houston even more.

The Law of Divine Compensation: On Work, Money and Miracles by Marianne Williamson Harper Collins

f the pandemic has caused you any type of anxiety concerning your career and finances, I highly suggest that you order this book today! Spirituality, healing and miracles is the genre of the books written by Marianne Williamson. This pocket sized, power packed book is the perfect source to remind you of just how good you have it and to not lose track of that. Examples of feeling too old to make a good living or working to live are used to express this point. The Law of Divine Compensation was published in 2012 and it is so relevant today. Williamson dispels the myth that miracles are not real. In fact, she writes that if you are not experiencing miracles everyday, then something is off. I am telling you, this book is perfect if you want to get lifted and be reminded of your personal power. This also makes a great gift for someone, who is on a spiritual journey and is in search of their own power. It is also excellent for someone, who is not aware of the power that they have to live a life of abundance and freedom. The good news, this is a quick read and is a book that you will want to read multiple times because it feels that good.

Open Book by Jessica Simpson Harper Collins

essica Simpson most definitely stayed true to the title of her autobiography. How lovely that she is able to tell her own story and give the reader a deep, inside look at all of the drama that she went through to be a pop princess. Simpson put everything on the table. If you are a fan or you enjoy getting to the bottom of the stories that you heard about on entertainment news, then Open Book will satisfy. The diary format is a great timeline from her childhood through present day. My favorite part was during the 90s era when Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and Justin Timberlake were on their rise to fame. Simpson talks about how she felt inferior to the rising pop stars and bombed her Mickey Mouse Club audition simply because she could not fathom being in the same room with such competition. Little did I know that Simpson and Timerblake had a brief fling following her divorce from Nick Lachey. Simpson admits that sexuality played a big role in her career and how she knew that her first marriage was not built to last. It is a sad but true story. The wild thing is, I started charting where I was in my young adulthood as these events were unfolding on the pages of this autobiography. Open Book is one that you will not want to put down because Simpson is spilling all of the tea and I am here for it!

A Happy Pocket Full of Money: Infinite Wealth and Abundance in the Here and Now by David Cameron Gikandi Hampton Roads

learned about this book from a business coach. She explained that this book changed the way that she looked at money and prosperity. Now that I have read and studied the material, I get it. A Happy Pocket Full of Money is a book that is less about money and more about allowing the life that you have always dreamed possible for you. There are constant reminders to recite: I am wealth, I am abundance, I am joy. It felt strange to read this over and over again. The part that made me throw the book down was the idea that the life you crave is already happening. Yes, the life that you wish you had, is already happening simultaneously with the life that you are living. This is bananas and it is scientific. In fact, the first chapter of the book breaks down the science of our subconscious and how quantum physics plays a huge role in our lives. You really have to read this book for yourself. Let me warn you, this is not an easy read. However, it is highly recommended that you get this for yourself if you are in search of something better. This book is not for everyone. Only give this book to someone, who is on a spiritual journey and openly talks about it. Otherwise, they will say thank you and throw this book on the floor in the closet, where it may never see the light of day.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Family

Night Frights

10 Ways to Help a Child with Nightmares

by Dr. Tom Jackson

hat do you do when your little one has scary dreams? There are two issues to examine when trying to help a child who is suffering from nightmares: What to do during the nightmare or just after the child awakens from one. What to do in the child’s daily life, before and after sleeptime to help keep the bad dreams away. Another way to put it is...there is crisis management and then there is crisis prevention. First, let’s talk about how to manage a child’s nightmare when it occurs.

1. Focus on staying loving and calm, first. Whatever you do to help your child deal with nightmares, DO NOT ignore his cries in the middle of the night. If you do feel yourself becoming angry, frustrated or impatient with him (for waking you up) take a few moments to breathe deeply and calm yourself before walking into the child’s room.

The one thing you don’t want your child to feel at this critical moment is any sort of anger, frustration, impatience or other lack of support from you.

2. Go to your child immediately.

Stay alert to frightened wakings in the middle of the night, which is easiest to do if your bedroom is close to your child’s, but if not, consider installing a baby monitor. As soon as you hear your child waking up frightened (screaming, crying, whimpering, etc.), go to him immediately and reassure him with comforting words, soothing him just as you would if he became frightened by an event during the day. You can employ any number of additional strategies for dealing with your child’s nightmares as they occur.

3. Comfort and calm your child.

Cuddle with your child. Gently stroke his head or back. And listen to your child’s fears with empathy, understanding that his fears are perfectly real, and should not be

discounted under any circumstances. If your child wishes to discuss the nightmare, by all means encourage it. Then offer reassurance and comfort until your child has calmed down sufficiently to return to sleep. Keep in mind that if your child is afraid to go back to sleep, this may require your staying in the room until that time comes. If he is very frightened you will need to do whatever is required to help him calm down, possibly by reading a story or enjoying a simple, distracting and – above all – relaxing activity together. Or perhaps lie down with your child or even let him join you in your bed. You may find it helpful to provide a nightlight in your child’s room, but make sure it isn’t casting scary shadows or you’ll defeat the purpose of it being there.

4. Remind your child that it was only a dream, but don’t expect that to settle the issue.

Remember, however, as you sleepily grope for the right thing to say, telling a very young child, “It’s only a dream,” is unlikely to help since young children don’t yet understand that dreams

at bedtime, reading and otherwise helping him to relax. A soothing bedtime ritual might also include a relaxing bath, a gentle massage, a warm mug of herbal (caffeine-free) tea, or even something as simple as being tucked in with regular hugs and kisses.

possibly lead to bad dreams? Also, monitor the television programs and movies your child watches and the video games your child plays so as to avoid those that might be too scary, violent, or otherwise disturbing.

Remind your child that he can think comforting thoughts to soothe himself as well. Suggest, for example, that he imagine the nightmare scenario ending in a happy manner. Don’t underestimate this method, for it helps teach your child to conquer his nightmares by actively imagining taking charge of the scene. This activity may also help him develop confidence, self-esteem and a sense of proactive control over his responses to issues in daily life. As in waking conflict, unpleasant dreamtime scenarios typically include stages of threat and struggle. Whatever methods you follow, look at the nightmares as an opportunity to help your child learn to use the innate tools he has for achieving resolution of his fears and confidence in his ability to face up to the frightening events of his life – both sleeping and waking.

2. Discuss your child’s dreams.

By age three, your child can begin to talk directly with you about any concerns and worries that could be triggering nightmares; then you can offer reassurance and guidance for dealing with those causes. Allow your child, at any age, to express feelings in appropriate ways. Try to assure your child that his feelings are understandable and normal. It is important to maintain open communication with him by expressing your willingness to discuss any concerns he may have, no matter how difficult or touchy the issue may be. If your child has difficulty expressing either the content of the nightmares or the concerns in waking life that could be causing them, consider exploring these issues in more creative and less explicit ways, for example by drawing or playacting.

Now, how do you prevent future nightmares?

In addition to discussing the content of your child’s bad dreams in an effort to uncover their cause, it may also be worthwhile to review the content of your child’s daily life. Might there be something happening at home or elsewhere in your child’s daily life that could be causing enough distress to

aren’t real. With children who are at least three or four-years-old, though, it may be helpful to remind them that they were dreaming, although they, too, may still have difficulty understanding the nature of dreams.

5. Empower your child to take charge of their dreams.

l. Prevention is the best cure. Prevention is the challenge, but also the best solution. Make bedtime a comfortable and safe experience for the child. Spend time with him

If your child experiences frequent nightmares (several a month), you may want to work with him during the day to try to determine what underlying fears may be causing them and then to try to resolve the trouble on that level. What is the child actually afraid of? Discussing the content of the dreams with the child can help shed insight into this critical question. Once you know what your child is afraid of – whether it’s spiders or the possible death of a parent – you can then focus your attention on that fear, rather than the nightmare. Once the fear precipitating the nightmares goes away, it is entirely possible that the nightmares themselves will as well.

3. Examine your child’s daily routine.

4. Discuss your child’s daily life.

5. Speak with a doctor if it seems necessary.

A nightmare disorder occurs when frequent and repeated nightmares continually disrupt a child’s sleep. If the nightmares continue even after you’ve employed measures to end them, it may be helpful to discuss your concern with your child’s doctor.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Family

Teach Your Children How to Have a

Healthy Relationship by Lori Bregman

hen I first saw this quote I can’t even begin to tell you how many things went through my head and rang true for me on so many different levels. Children see and pick up on EVERYTHING. We often don’t give them enough credit for the things they are aware of. Your relationship with your spouse is setting the bar for them to follow. If you are in a toxic or unhealthy relationship you are showing them that this is OK. If you and your spouse treat each other with love and respect, you are blazing a trail for them on how to be treated and how to treat others this way. If it is OK for my mom or dad to be treated this way then why shouldn’t it be OK for me? Just a little something to think about. We are the most open and sensitive to energy when we are children. Even though you might not always be fighting, children can feel your energy. They can sense when something is right or wrong. The bond between a mother and a child runs deep. My mother always told me that when I was little, I always seemed to know more than I should have. I would say things to her that I picked up on that she could not believe that I saw or felt. I am no different than the children that I see and work with every day. I once worked with a client, who had three sons. The couple were having marital problems and later divorced. The husband was verbally abusive, disrespectful and cheating on her. She was always in a state of constant fear and anxiety. Feeling her anxiety (because children feel everything) the boys started acting out. Months later, they started treating her the same way her husband was treating her.

There was another case years ago, when I was working with someone who was telling me about her husband and how toxic and stressed out his energy was. He would walk in the door each night with a black cloud above his head and then take out all of his stress on his spouse. She would get upset and either lash out or hold it in while fuming inside. I remember seeing a vision of her baby playing on the ground getting energetically hit between the toxic energy that was emanating out of the two of them. Without even knowing what was happening, the energetic foundation for relating was beginning to form in this child.Years later, this child is demonstrating similar behavioral problems.

“The most

important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” ~Rev. Theodore Hesburgh

It is a fact that everyday will not be perfect, even the very best of relationships have their ups and downs. It is important to monitor the negative energy and whether it is the constant state and pace of the overall theme of the relationship. Similar to

the 80/20 rule: It is what you do 80% of the time that makes a difference and has an impact. Personally, I am grateful to have many couples, who are positive role models. These couples demonstrate what a healthy and happy relationship is and I can clearly see how their children thrive from it. I asked the couples I admire and respect what is the formula to having a balanced relationship? Here are the three things that they shared: 1. We want each other to be happy and we do what we each can do to make this happen. 2. We have a deep love and respect for one another. 3. We are supportive of one another. It is so simple, yet VERY effective! As the parents, it is good to strive for a happy home. Children, who live in a balanced home tend to feel more secure and empowered. As their parents, you set the tone for what they will look for once they begin dating or seeking a significant other. Let’s make being in happy and respectful relationships a normal way of life.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Family

Back Talk and What You Can Do About It by Leslie Morgan Steiner

ast week, I reread the family diary I kept faithfully years ago when my first two children were little. The entries stopped rather abruptly after my third child entered the picture. For ten years, I haven’t had time to look at these notes. Most amusing: examples of the back talk problem I used to have with my middle child. Here are the things my daughter actually said to me: “Mom, I very ’pointed in you!” “Mom, I put you in storage!” “Mom, no YOU be quiet!” She was two-years-old at the time. Let’s just say, the back talk got worse after that. For about 12 years. I’m still not certain how I, or my daughter, survived the sputtering rage her increasingly sophisticated back talk inspired. My parenting wisdom today, knowing what I know now as a mom with three teenagers, is that it is essential to teach your children not to talk back as soon as they start testing out this behavior on you. If they do it at school, on the playground or basketball court, the consequences could be serious, even life-threatening. When or if you ignore their early sass outbursts, then they will use the lag time to hone their back talk skills. What the experts told me then was simple: in order to stop children from talking back (or gesturing back, also

common and equally enraging/ dangerous) parents need to find a way to reason with the child. “Reason,” in my family’s case, came in the form of punishment. Some experts don’t believe in punishing their children for bad behavior. Those people have never had kids who could talk back like mine, or had a twelve year-old give them the finger. Sure, I tried explaining etiquette to my children. I took away dessert. I sent them to their room. This was moderately successful with my oldest and youngest children. However, none of these “soft” tactics worked with my middle daughter, except to make her laugh devilishly.

According to Psychotherapist, Amy Morin, it is good to ignore attempts to get your attention when your child talks back. “Talking back often stems from a child’s desire to get out of doing something he doesn’t want to do. After all, the longer they can get you to engage in an argument, the longer he can delay doing what you’ve asked him to do,” said Morin. While tips like these are helpful in times of distress, t he most effective back talk punishment, ever, came the day her father gave her an iPhone as a birthday present. I recommend every parent get their child a smartphone at as young an age as possible, simply so you can take it away as a behavioral tool. Imagine for a second if your boss had the option of impounding your smartphone if you misbehaved at work – or your husband could appropriate it if you did not pay enough attention to him at dinner. Yep. There we go. The privilege of a smartphone is so profound, addictive, delectable and socially imperative, that my daughter used to stop speaking mid-sentence when I reached to take away her purple-cased iPhone. Which I did several times a day for years.

d e s o p p u s I m a t a h W

? ? ? o d o t

I concocted three tiers of smartphone repossession, which I learned to communicate non-verbally so I could mete them out when I was on the phone, driving, or working at my computer: Parent Holds Up One Finger = one hour Parent Holds Up Two Fingers = the rest of the day Parent Holds Up Three Fingers = 24 hours I was cold-hearted in the face of defiant back talk. My daughter quickly understood the system. I never once relented after making the threat to confiscate her iPhone. That girl could beg, scream and cry like nobody’s business. But I learned to harden my heart – for her sake, of course. Which is why the punishment worked. Surprising to me, one of the biggest problems with ending back talk can be incidental family members. My other children were not allies in my punishment scheme. They tortured their sister by dangling their own phones in her face. They also argued

with me that whatever they had done was nowhere near as awful as what she had done so their punishment had to be lesser.

and effective punishment you invent.

Ditto for my husband. He was at the office or on business trips for most of her daily/hourly tantrum-y back talk sessions so for years he thought I was the crazy one, not her. He was constitutionally incapable of disciplining our daughter. In fact, he couldn’t even uphold my punishments.

In sum: think long and hard before you settle on a punishment that will be effective and make sure it is one that you alone can control. Back talk can be cured. My daughter is now a lovely, well-behaved, polite and mature 16-year-old angel who is a constant source of joy and delight – particularly because these days she lives 90 miles away at boarding school and it is hard for her to spout off from so far away.

So I had to get creative about where I hid her verboten iPhone – from him. Otherwise he would give it back to her. I forgave him, because he had grown up without siblings, a kind of lala childhood that meant he didn’t understand family dynamics, poor thing.

The best news for those of you struggling, as almost all parents do, with back talk: one day when they are teenagers, those same kids who drive you whack-job crazy now with their obnoxious, incessant, mind-bending back talk abilitie s , may not talk to you at all.

Here is my back talk advice: first, find an effective punishment. But equally important is recognizing it is not just about punishing the sassy mouth. You have to survey the family terrain first and look for landmines. Question whether you can count on your spouse or other family members to help enforce whatever utterly brilliant

Special thanks to my Harvard ’87 classmate — New York comedian, author and stressed-out mom Karen Bergreen for contributing to this topic.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Family

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Family

10 Things You Should Do Before You

Discuss Divorce with Your Spouse

by Lois Liberman and Marilyn Chinitz

hile you may have come to the conclusion that your marriage is over and you are eager to announce your decision, we recommend that you take the following steps before “crossing the rubicon” and telling your spouse that you want a divorce. Knowledge is power and it is important for you to be fully informed about your rights and obligations under the law before discussing the topic of divorce with your spouse:

1. Consult a Family Law Attorney

An attorney who is knowledgeable of the domestic relations/family laws in the state where you reside will be able to provide you with important information and guidance about what you can expect regarding child support, maintenance and equitable distribution and about child custody

and parental access. Don’t consult someone who dabbles in family law – consult a specialist in the field.

2. Know Your Financial Picture Be knowledgeable about your and your spouse’s finances. Summarize income from all sources. Identify assets and liabilities (both in your name and in your spouse’s name), when and how they were acquired and list what insurance coverage (medical, dental, optical and life) there is for your family. Once armed with this critical information, you will be able to obtain a clearer understanding of your entitlement under the law.

3. Understand your Monthly Expenses

Be able to articulate how much you spend on a monthly basis both on basic needs and discretionary items.

This fluency in your expenses will enable you to better understand what your needs are on a temporary and permanent basis.

4. Obtain Financial Records

Before you even utter the word “divorce” to your spouse, look for bank statements, cancelled checks, tax returns, life insurance policies, credit card statements, closing binders, loan documents, etc. and make copies of those records.

5. Open Up Your Own Bank Account

It is important to have monies in your own name in case of an emergency and in the event that your spouse attempts to reduce your access to funds and credit cards after your announcement. Having funds in your own account will also enable you to hire an attorney when you are ready.

6. Build your Credit

If you don’t have credit cards in your name, apply for them so that you build up credit. Use the cards and pay the entire balance each month. By doing this, not only will you establish your own credit, but it will enable you to document your expenses.

7. Consult a Child Therapist

To ensure that your children are protected from the stress and tension which has led you to making this decision, consult with a child therapist who can make suggestions as to the best way to advise your children about the divorce after you have discussed the same with your spouse. A child therapist can also provide you with the tools and strategies to deal with many of the issues that will arise once your children have been told and how to deal with questions that they have.

8. Safeguard Important Personal Belongings:

Hurt, anger and resentment often cause people to act out of spite.

Before you discuss the issue of divorce with your spouse, make sure to safeguard important personal belongings which could go missing or be destroyed. Open a safe deposit box or place these items with a friend or family member.

9 . Consider Your Legal Options for Resolution:

There are many options, but not all options work for all parties. Negotiation and/or litigation between two parties represented by counsel; Mediation – in which a neutral third party attempts to help the parties reach a compromise; Collaborative Divorce – where each party has an attorney, but the adversarial milieu is replaced by a philosophy of harmony and the goal of getting along. If there is one party who is very controlling or there is an uneven balance of financial power, mediation may not be the best option. If there is a party who is acting unreasonably, you could find yourself having to go back to square one in collaborative divorces because you entered into a contract in which your collaborative attorney cannot

represent you in litigation. Seriously consider the dynamic between you and your spouse when selecting your path to resolution.

10. Ensure That You Have a Support Network:

Make sure that you have surrounded yourself with people whom you trust to not only provide you with the emotional comfort that will be essential but who will also tell you the truth, even when it is hard to hear. Whether that support network is made up of family, friends and/or mental health professionals, make sure that they are in place before you embark upon your journey. Lois Liberman and Marilyn Chinitz are Partners and matrimonial attorneys at Blank Rome LLP in New York. Lois and Marilyn are litigators who handle complex divorce matters for opposite-sex and same-sex couples.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Fashion and Beauty Fashion and Beauty

How to Cover Up a

Pimple by Cyvia Lewis

here is nothing worse than waking up in the morning to discover a giant red zit staring back at you in the mirror and you have a very important Zoom meeting in 30 minutes. But fear not! You can still look great even on the days when your skin is rebelling with these expert tips for hiding imperfections.

How to Cover Up a Pimple Shift the focus:

Make another area of your face the focal point – such as your eyes, your cheeks, or your lips. For example, if you have a pimple on your chin – consider bumping up your eye makeup, using more mascara or curling your eyelashes. Taupe eyeshadows is another great glam trick.

Make it disappear:

Apply your foundation all over first. Buy a tinted treatment gel and apply it directly onto the pimple. The green will neutralize and correct the redness in the pimple. Then apply the concealer onto the center of the pimple with a concealer brush or your finger. Be sure to always sanitize your hands before applying makeup. Blend into your foundation to minimize the appearance. Then set with powder. Keep all the colors you are using on your face in the warm family. This will also downplay any redness. (Think colors in the sunset.) Voila! This should do the trick! Now, you will look great for your Zoom meeting. Say bye-bye to blemishes!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Fashion and Beauty

Creative Ways to

Wear a Scarf In Every Season by Madison Pados

very girl has a closet or drawer dedicated to her favorite accessories – from earrings and bracelets to belts and scarves.

Scarves are particularly versatile accessories and can be worn in various ways during any season. Plus, scarves can make an outfit when you need to look pulled together in a hurry. If you have a scarf collection, you may not be wearing them as much as you can. Knowing the different ways to wear various types of scarves is the key to making this accessory work every day. Experiment with these five different ways of wearing scarves to add a pop of color or extra layer to any outfit: 1. During the spring and summer, tie a thin, square scarf in a French twist to add a level of chicness to your clothes. First, fold the scarf a few times to make it thin and narrow. Then, loop it around your neck and tie a knot to the side. If the scarf is extra long, loop it around your neck twice, tying it at the front and pulling the knot to one side. You can wear a scarf like this with either a casual outfit or even a dressy one. 2. European loops are the preferred scarf style for thick scarves worn during cold weather. It is as easy as can be to tie, it lets the scarf hang down long and it effectively covers up your neck and throat. Start by folding a long, narrow scarf in half. Then, loop it around your neck, tucking the end into the loop that is formed at the fold. Pull the ends tight to make the neck snug or pull the knot down to loosen it up.

3. If you have a square scarf, you can use it as a kind of necklace or

an accent to your top. This works best with scarves that have a bit of weight but are not as thick as a warm weather scarf. You want it to hang down with a little weight without being too warm to keep on for the whole day. Fold the scarf in half to make a triangle and then tie the ends behind your neck. Let the third corner hang straight down or pull it to one side. 4. If your scarf is big enough and it is not at all see-through, you can tie it to wear as a shirt. Wear it alone if the weather’s warm or underneath a cardigan if it is chilly out. To start, open the scarf up all the way. Take one straight side and place it between your neck and your chest. Then, wrap it around the back of your neck, tying it at the back to create a halter top. Next, wrap the bottom part of the scarf around your waist and tie it at the back. 5. If you’re having a bad hair day, you can use your scarf as headwear. Either purchase a head scarf or take a regular square scarf. Fold the scarf in half to create a triangle. Then, place one straight side on your forehead. Take the two ends and tie them around the back or your head, over your hair, or at your neck, underneath your hair. If you only have long, thin scarves, you can wrap one around your head like a headband, tying it at the nape of your neck and letting the long ends hang loose. Using scarves as headwear is a great look, especially during the summertime when you need a quick fix for messy beach hair. California living affords us the opportunity to have messy beach hair year round. Have fun with your scarves. A pretty scarf is a great way to add a pop of color to any look. Give these looks a try to boost your wardrobe.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Fashion and Beauty

The ABCs of Bras and How to Choose the Right One by Madison Pados

re you wearing a bra? Guess what – it probably doesn’t fit! For years, industry experts have claimed that about 85% of women are either not getting enough support from their undergarments as a result of wearing bras several sizes too big or hurting their breasts by stuffing them into containers that are too small. Although we weren’t able to find any hard research to back up this stat, it is a pretty widely held perception that women are commonly mistaken about their bra size.

Before you strap on your lingerie, take a minute to find out if you are wearing the right size, style and fit. The first step in buying the right bra is figuring out what size you wear. Here’s how to make sure you have the proper measurement: ● To find your band size, use a soft tape measure and wrap it around your torso, directly underneath your breasts. Then add five to that number for your band width (if it’s not a full number, round up). For example, if you measure in at 28.5 + 5 = 34.

● For cup size, while wearing an unpadded bra, measure across the fullest part of your bust. For a most accurate reading, don’t pull the tape measure too tightly. ● Subtract that number from your band size to figure out your cup size. Typically, each one inch is equal to one cup size. Start with 00 = AA, 1 =A and so on. Once you know your size, now it is time to figure out what style works best for you. Here’s a breakdown on all the different types of support you can buy:

The T-Shirt Bra

It’s designed to provide a smooth look under t-shirts.This is the most popular style.

The Strapless Bra

This bra allows you to wear any strapless/revealing tops without losing all the support of a bra with a strap, but more support than a bandeau. However, if active, this type of bra may be inclined to slip. Beware of any potential wardrobe malfunctions.

The Backless Bra

This bra is perfect for any backless or low back tops/dresses. They tend to be adhesive in order to avoid having a band. Unfortunately, the adhesive may wear off after several wears.

The Racerback Bra

Designed with a T-strap in the back allows you to wear any racerback top or is perfect if you just prefer more movement in your back and shoulders without bra strap slippage. However, since there is more pressure on your shoulders, you can experience more neck pain and shoulder pain when wearing this style of bra.

great example of finding the perfect fit so you don’t have to wrestle with your bra.

The Push-Up Bra

This bra helps to improve the look of your cleavage by having pads inserted into strategic areas of the cup. They come in various degrees of padding so you can achieve an extreme amount of push-up or a natural looking cleavage. As an added plus, most padding can also be removed if you desire a less extreme look during the day and then reinserted for an evening look.

The Bralette

Ahh, the comfort of it all. This bra is perfect for you if you like to sleep in a bra. While some women prefer to sleep in a bra for extra support, an actual bra is not always comfortable to sleep in. Treat yourself to a bralette bra. It is lightweight, seamless and offers just the right amount of support under your tank top or pjs and will not have you bouncing around and feeling unsupported. The bralette is not recommended if you are more top heavy.

The Nursing Bra

Made to give you as much support as possible during the late stage of pregnancy and postpartum. As a nursing mom, it is a good idea to invest in a few good nursing bras. This type of support comes in handy when you are tackling nursing your little one and wanting comfort all in one. You may find that you will need varying cup sizes through your different nursing stages so be prepared to buy more than one.

The Full Cup Bra

This bra is designed to cover the entire breast for lots of support. The great thing about this bra is that it makes your chest seem fuller without having to worry about any sagging. It is ideal for women with larger busts, who are experiencing back pain. The full cup bra is perfect for relieving some pressure off your back when it is properly fitted.

The Sports Bra

Made to give your bust support while exercising without being uncomfortable. They vary in support levels so you can find the best fit for whatever activity. One con, they can be difficult to remove. This is definitely a

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Fashion and Beauty How to Feel Better About

Your Body by The Modern Princess

“Everything has beauty, but not everybody sees it.” - Confucius

ommy, I love you,” my daughter Sienna said. “And I love myself too!”

I was overjoyed to hear this healthy talk coming from my three-year-old, especially after I’d read some recent statistics on the difficulties women have in loving ourselves. As we all know, beauty issues, dieting, health and self-esteem are all tangled up in the impossible expectations we have for ourselves. These shattered images of beauty begin early in life, when media bombardment starts, targeting preschoolers with ideals of beauty that simply don’t exist. Most models weigh 23% less than the average-sized women and actually meet the clinical criteria for anorexia. Even then, swimsuit models’ figures are often airbrushed to look even more frighteningly thin than they already do. According to a recent study, moms, on average, worry more about their bodies than women who have not had children, in addition to worrying about passing on that poor selfimage banter to their children. So what’s a body to do?

1. Spend less time looking in the mirror and more time doing what you love.

How much time do women spend looking in the mirror? Datas shows that on average, women dedicate 55 minutes a day to their appearance, or a full two weeks a year. Almost double the male average of 4.5 hours a week. Guess what? So much facetime can negatively impact your self image - 60% of adult women have negative thoughts about themselves at least once a week, compared to 36% of men. The figures are higher for teenage girls. A whopping 78% reported having negative thoughts about their looks at least once a week, while spending over seven hours a week on their appearance. Reverse those numbers by spending more time actively engaged in your passions and talents, and less time looking at your wrinkles! Odds are, you’ll feel better and worry less.

2. If you are obsessing, change your priorities.

Some 67% of adult women regularly worry about their appearance, more than finances, career, health or relationships. Images of impossible beauty ideals are everywhere, and even though we are aware they are impossible, there seems to be a connection in how we see ourselves. Women obsess over body “trouble

spots” twice as much as men. Apparently, women have six “trouble spots” compared to only three for men: tummy, skin, thighs, hair, cellulite and butt. Creating healthy habits such as a nutritious diet and regular exercise will not only boost your metabolism (and your butt), it will increase self-esteem and your sense of well-being.

3. Talk yourself up, not down.

Negative talk about our bodies or age is common. Nearly 80% of women engage in what the media has nicknamed “fat talk” and “old talk.” But studies show it only makes you feel worse. Ruminating over body issues creates anxiety. Try instead to notice the wonderful things about yourself—both inside and out. Count your blessings and sing your praises, for we are all beautiful in a thousand different ways.

4. Accept yourself.

No matter what your body type is, you are the perfect you. As Dr. Seuss so wisely put it; “There is no one alive who is youer than you!”

5. Remember: you are a model, a role model.

What is the most important thing we can teach our daughters? To love themselves!!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Food

Green Bean Casserole

Stove Top

by George Larsen

hanksgiving is almost here. Now is a good time to begin planning your menu for the big day. While there a plethora of ways to make classic Thanksgiving recipes, I like this alternative way to make my annual green bean casserole. Chances are, your oven will be pretty busy roasting the turkey and browning the ham. The stove top casserole is perfect and makes a great side dish.

Stove Top Style Green Bean Casserole

Most of the cooking for this dish will be done on the stove top. The last 30 minutes are spent in the oven: When the entrée (turkey) is removed to be carved, place the prepared casserole

in and your Thanksgiving dinner will be perfectly timed!! Ingredients: ● 4 (15 oz.) cans green beans (not drained) ● 2 onions, chopped ● 2 (10 oz.) cans cream of mushroom soup ● 16-32 ounces Velveeta cheese (depends on how much cheese you like) ● French-fried onions ● Salt and pepper to taste Directions: Finely chop the onions. Place undrained beans and onions into the saucepan. Bring to boil then simmer until ½ of the bean juice is evaporated. Add the mushroom soup, cheese (begin using ½ pound – add more

later for a cheesier casserole). Add salt and pepper to taste. Simmer mixture until the cheese melts. Stir occasionally. Add more cheese if desired. Spray casserole dish with cooking spray. Pour the mixture into the casserole dish, cover with foil, and bake on 350º for 30 minutes. Uncover casserole, sprinkle French fried onions evenly over the top, leave uncovered, and bake in the oven until brown – approximately 5 minutes. Voila! Your casserole is served. Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

ad?

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Food

Thanksgiving Leftovers: The Best Way to Organize Them by Alicia Rockmore

he first thing to consider is if you will have a large turkey and a large family get together, we suggest you give as much away to them in disposable cartons as you are comfortable doing. This gives them leftovers for sandwiches and snacks too! Don’t forget the sides! If you made too much food for your family to eat in a couple of days – realistically speaking – you should let your guest take some home as well. Yes that includes the leftover mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, macaroni and cheese, collard greens, rolls, bread, stuffing, yams – the works! If you are hosting this year, once you are done eating, entertaining, playing cards and laughing with your family, dealing with the leftovers will be the last thing you want to do. If you only do one thing, make sure to cover the turkey in aluminum foil and place it in the refrigerator to keep it moist and fresh. The next day, once you are well rested,

you can organize your leftovers. If you are going to use some of the turkey leftovers for sandwiches, then cut the meat into sandwich size slices and wrap for storage in individual serving sizes – enough for one sandwich. You can actually make those sandwiches now and just pop into a sandwich bag and leave the condiments off. That way, when someone wants a sandwich they only need to add the mustard, lettuce and tomato for a wonderful snack! Be sure to take the dressing out of the turkey prior to storing – I suggest you line the inside of the turkey with cheesecloth before stuffing. Then when the turkey is ready, all you have to do is pull on the cheesecloth and ALL the dressing comes out. It is super easy and makes sure your turkey is safe and ready for storage. If you are going to make leftover dinners with your meat and vegetables, divide the leftovers by the meal you will be making. For example, if you are going to combine all the veggies and meat into a stew or casserole, determine how much you will need and package

that amount together for storage in your refrigerator. Don’t forget the bones will be great for a soup base! Pull all the meat off the bones and use the meat for the soup or other dishes. Freeze, freeze, freeze! If you really don’t want the food to go to waste then package it up and freeze it. You can even make your own homemade “frozen dinners” with your leftovers. If you don’t have enough freezer-type containers, use paper plates and make sure they are wrapped securely to avoid freezer burn and waste. Pop a label on your leftovers if you are going to use them for a specific dish so hungry folks won’t take from the wrong container. There you have it. It is good to begin thinking about how you want to organize your leftover food before you even begin cooking the Thanksgiving meal. As with anything, you will find that it will be a lot easier to get this done, when you have a plan.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Food

Hearty Thanksgiving Stuffing Recipe by Chef Michelle Karam

ne of the side dishes that I look forward to most on the Thanksgiving Day dinner table is stuffing! Seasoned stuffing, mushroom, andouille sausage, southwest style, cajun… seriously, I could pull a Forrest Gump here and name a million and one different kinds of stuffing that I love. But my no-fail, delicious, easy and I’m always coming back for seconds recipe for Cranberry Stuffing has gotta be me and my family’s favorite! This recipe has everything rolled into one! It is vibrant! It is colorful! It is all things autumn! It includes cranberry, mushrooms, celery and onions. Although the cranberry is included in the dressing, it is good to serve the cranberry sauce on the side as well. I mean, it is Thanksgiving after all, so let’s not skimp on the good stuff.

Cranberry Stuffing Recipe Ingredients:

● 1 small onion, diced ● 1 cup of diced mushrooms ● 3-4 stalks of celery, diced ● 1 stick of butter ● 1 package of seasoned stuffing (I use Mrs. Cubbison’s) ● 1-2 cups chicken broth or water (per box instructions) ● 1 package of fresh cranberries (may use canned if fresh unavailable) ● Fresh thyme

Directions:

Melt the butter and add the onion and celery. Allow to sweat and turn translucent. Add mushrooms and cook for another 3 to 5 minutes on medium high heat. Add the fresh cranberries. Don’t worry about the cranberries cooking down too much… you’re not looking for them to turn to mush just yet! They’ll cook down once they’re in the stuffing. Just give them about 3 to 4 minutes to cook. Now add the stuffing mix straight outta the box. Any brand that you happen to like. I usually use seasoned stuffing mix…it adds more flavor. Add broth and combine thoroughly. Transfer mixture into a Pyrex or baking pan that has been coated with non stick spray or butter. Sprinkle the top with some of the fresh thyme and bake in the oven covered at 375 degrees for about 30 minutes. During the last five minutes, remove the cover and allow the top to become golden brown. Happy Thanksgiving!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Home Design

How to

Draw the Odor Out of a Closet by Claire Siemsen

losed closets can be hosting a variety of strange, musty smells when you finally open the doors. This is especially true in a room belonging to a child. Remind the family that dirty clothing should be tossed into the laundry bin instead of being shoved into the closet. Cleaning the closet, airing out the clothes and removing shoes with offensive odors can go a long way toward removing the odors.

Masking Odors

You might not always have the time to try out these great tips and tricks from this article. In that case you will have to mask the odors. Usually, dryer sheets hidden in the closet can mask any unpleasant odors for the short term. You might use a cotton ball soaked in a little vanilla or use a bit of potpourri in the closet until you can get in there to clean.

Vinegar

Vinegar doesn’t have the best smell on its own but it is an amazing agent to soak up and neutralize weird odors in the closet. Fill a cup or bowl with

white vinegar. If you have apple cider on hand, that will work too. Leave it on the floor of the closet overnight. Remove it in the morning and allow the closet doors to stand open for a few hours. The smell should be gone.

offending shoes to remove the odor. Leave the baking soda in the carpet for a bit before vacuuming. This method can be used long-term. Change the baking soda box every few months.

Coffee Grounds

Activated Charcoal

A great way to rid yourself of unpleasant odors in a closed space like a closet is to use fresh, unbrewed coffee in a bowl on the closet floor. Leave a bowl of grounds on the floor overnight. This works great for smoky clothes that have left a lingering odor. The coffee grounds will absorb the odor but they cannot be left in the closet indefinitely.

Baking Soda

This is one of the most well-known methods for removing offending odors in small spaces. You likely have some baking soda in your refrigerator since it works so well getting rid of smells. The box of baking soda should be placed on a shelf in the closet because it works best when air is circulating around it. You can also sprinkle some on the carpet or inside

While this is one of the most expensive methods on this list, it is also the most effective. Activated charcoal is made from regular charcoal, which is highly porous and is used for a variety of ways to remove odors as well as contaminants. Charcoal is used in filters and air masks because it is so porous. It needs air flowing through it to work properly, so try to add it in a way that allows for air movement. You can purchase activated charcoal from your local pet store. Lastly, it is important to keep your closet nice and tidy. Vacuum, declutter and dust regularly to ensure that the closet is not filled with items that will result in or contribute to the odors that we work so hard to get rid of.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Home Design

DIY Your Own

Green

Bathroom Cleaning Products by Cindy Young

despise cleaning the bathroom. I am not proud to admit that I have actually gone months without doing it. Most of the time, I wait until we have company over and then I rush to do some last minute cleaning of the sink and toilet so that no one will judge me.

I decided to take the next step and make some of my own cleaning products and I was amazed. The combination of three household ingredients wiped off the soap scum with almost no effort. I want to share my favorite bathroom cleaning products that you can DIY:

It isn’t just because I don’t want to deal with the toilet. I mostly hate cleaning the bathroom because it’s hard to find good natural cleaning products. To make matters worse, we have well water so the toilet bowl has this impossible-to-get-rid-of orange stain from the iron in the water. The bathtub gets a thick layer of soap scum. The shower curtain is covered with mildew and I can’t remember what color our tile grout was.

Tub and Tile Cleaner

I tried all of the conventional cleaning products. I tried scrubbing with bubbles, soaking with bleach, foaming it all away. Most of these products worked pretty well but not great. And they left my bathroom smelling terrible. When I was pregnant, I couldn’t stand to even go into the bathroom because of that chemical smell. I decided to give green cleaning products a try, but I was convinced that something made out of things you can eat couldn’t possibly clean soap scum. Turns out I was wrong! Natural cleaning products worked as well as if not better than the toxic stuff I was used to using.

Creamy Soft Scrub Recipe Ingredients:

● 2 cups baking soda ● 1/2 cup Dr. Bronner’s Liquid Castile Soap (I prefer peppermint) ● 4 teaspoons pure vegetable glycerin (can be found online or in most natural foods stores) ● 10 drops essential oil (choose an antibacterial oil such as peppermint, cinnamon, tea tree, lavender or clove) – see this NIH study on the antibacterial properties of essential oils

Directions:

Mix ingredients together and keep in a glass jar. Use a spoonful of soft scrub on a damp washcloth to clean sinks, toilets, tile, tubs and showers. For tough stains, sprinkle the surface with baking soda or salt before using the soft scrub. For extra-tough stains, I like to wrap my washcloth with one of those plastic net bags that lemons and limes come in.

All-Purpose Spray Cleaner

All-Purpose Antiseptic Cleaner Ingredients:

● 1 teaspoon washing soda or baking soda ● 1/2 teaspoon Dr. Bronner’s Liquid Castile Soap (I prefer peppermint) ● 2 cups hot water ● 15-20 drops antibacterial essential oil

Directions:

Combine all ingredients in a spray bottle (a reused one works great) and shake to mix. Spray on surfaces like the bathroom counter and toilet to clean and disinfect. Wipe clean with damp washcloth. Let it sit for 10 minutes to get extra antiseptic impact.

Toilet Bowl Cleaner Ingredients:

● Borax or Baking Soda

Directions:

I simply sprinkle about a 1/2 cup of either borax or baking soda in the toilet, let it sit for an hour and then clean with a toilet brush. It works great!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Home Design

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Home Design Seven Ways to

Get Organized Before the Holidays by Linda Sovich

all is a great time of the year to get organized for the holidays, before everything gets too hectic. The following fall organizing tips from the experts at Major Mom are sure to help get you started on the right track for the upcoming holiday season. 1. Start with the entrance closet by replacing the pool bag, flip flops and windbreakers with coats, hats and winter boots. If you left the winter clothes in the closet all summer then it is a good time to purge what no longer fits or makes you feel good when you wear it. 2. It is time to change all the beds in the house with flannel sheets and extra blankets. This is also a good time to purge all the linens you did not use over the summer. 3. Replace the summer clothes with the winter clothes. Depending on the space in your home, you can remove the summer clothes and transfer to another closet in the home that is not used frequently or if space is limited use canvas box organizers to replace summer clothes with winter. You can put these boxes on the floor or on a shelf above.

4. Replace your air filters so that your heating unit will work properly throughout the winter months. 5. Place the pool and water play toys, garden tools, etc up high to make room for the winter gear and snowboards. Use hooks and shelving to organize your garage. That is the key, no point in throwing everything in the garage. Take the time to put everything properly in its place. 6. Have a service come in and blow out your sprinklers so your pipes don’t burst during the winter. 7. Time to put a scraper, hand warmers, mittens and a hat in your car trunk just in case we get a nice layer of snowfall this year. There. These are easy tasks that do not take a lot of time and will make a world of difference when the winter months come rolling into the Antelope Valley. Now is a great time to get organized and eliminate unnecessary stress during the holiday season.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Lifestyle Tried and True Signs It Might Be Time to Buy a Pair of

Reading Glasses by Anaverde Magazine

o you ever feel like you look like you’re playing the trombone when you are reading a book or trying to decipher the small text on your cell phone? It goes something like this: you look at the print up-close, then adjust the distance several times until the words come into focus. If this new method of reading is becoming a habit, it might be time for reading glasses. Here are five signs that it might be time to invest in a pair of reading glasses:

1. You are over the age of 40.

Everyone’s eyesight changes at a different rate, but most people develop presbyopia in their 40s. Presbyopia is a condition in which the eyes strain to focus on nearby objects. This is different from farsightedness, or hyperopia, a condition in which you can see distant objects clearly, but objects nearby may be blurry. Hyperopia is usually present at birth, but presbyopia develops during the aging process.

2. You need brighter light when reading.

If you never seem to have enough light, regardless of the room type or the number of lamps you have turned on, it may be time to get reading glasses. According to a study, a 60-year-old requires three times as much light as a 20-year-old to do the same tasks.

3. Your eyes get tired when reading or working at your computer.

Do you find yourself dozing off at your computer or do your eyelids get heavy when you read or do detailed work? If you are developing presbyopia, your eyes are working harder and straining more than they normally would. A temporary solution is to blink more often, take more breaks or adjust your screen to reduce glare. Another option would be to get some reading glasses, pronto!

4. You seem to experience more headaches.

Consistently straining your eyes to read or focus on crafts could give you headaches. A headache right behind your eyes could be indicative of hyperopia. It is important to remember the 20-20-20 rule: every 20 minutes, look at something at least 20 feet away for 20 seconds. True, this might be tough to remember with all that is going on in your life, however, If your headaches persist, you should visit your eye doctor for a comprehensive eye exam.

5. You see halos.

When your lens cannot focus light into your retina, it makes your vision appear blurry. You may see glowing circles around light bulbs or car headlights. Glasses often solve this problem, according to an article in Readers Digest, this may also be an early sign of cataracts

Remember, it is important to stay current with your comprehensive eye exams. This is the best way to know when you need your first pair of reading glasses, or “readers.” At each visit, your eye doctor will test your distance vision and your near vision so your prescription can be adjusted and fine-tuned to your eyes’ needs. If it has been more than one year since your last comprehensive eye exam, call your eye doctor to make an appointment.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Lifestyle

How To Maximize Savings This Black Friday by Bethany Hollars

ovember is here and that means...BLACK FRIDAY is upon us!

This year may look a little different, but one thing is for sure, the savings will start early. We must be prepared. Black Friday is all about snagging great deals and saving a ton of money. This is the time to buy the brands that rarely go on sale during the rest of the year and to maximize your savings on everything else! Here are my top six saving strategies for Black Friday:

1. Save big on LEGO at Walmart.

It is very rare to find steep discounts on LEGO products. Walmart has offered great savings on LEGO during past Black Fridays — over 50% off! Look for LEGO sets that are offered as doorbusters or Special Buys for the biggest savings.

2. Shop for Apple at Target.

Discounts on Apple products are super rare. Take advantage of Black Friday deals to save 25-35% on iPhones, iPads, and even iPods. Keep an eye out for deals that offer gift cards when you make an Apple purchase, as this is where you normally see the biggest savings. Shop for your Apple gear at Target and use your Target RedCard to save an additional 5% off your entire purchase. Stay tuned to your Target Cartwheel app for additional Black

Friday savings.

3. Buy your toys and video games at Kohl’s.

Most retailers will sell high demand toys and video game consoles for the same price on Black Friday. Kohl’s wins the retailer war though, due to their Kohl’s Cash program. During Black Friday, Kohl’s offers $15 Kohl’s Cash for every $50 you spend. Kohl’s Cash can be used during a set timeframe in the upcoming weeks towards any purchase. That means that the Xbox console that is $200 everywhere is actually only $140 at Kohl’s (after Kohl’s Cash). Plus, Kohl’s has offered amazing savings on name-brand toys in Black Fridays past — such as 50% off and higher on name brands such as Fisher Price and Melissa & Doug.

4. Huge discounts on clothing at JCPenney.

JCPenney has offered some amazing savings in Black Fridays past, including handing out mystery coupons instore that gave customers a chance to save up to $500 off of $500! Aside from a chance to score a free shopping spree, you can find great discounts on clothing at JCPenney — usually around 60% off!

5. Stock up on makeup at Ulta and Sephora.

Department stores will often roll out makeup promotions for Black Friday, but they usually entail making a minimum purchase in order to receive a complimentary gift set or additional

products for free. Shop instead at Ulta and Sephora for huge discounts on high-end makeup brands like Urban Decay, Morphe, Anastasia of Beverly Hills, and more. Plus, expect to see great discounts storewide — usually around 40%!

6. Amazon Prime is your go to for online shopping.

People love to hate Amazon but we got to hand it to the online retailer, they have it all. You must start early if you want to get the best deals before they sell out. The array of inventory and the discounts on this site is endless. Shipping is free for prime members. However, it is interesting to note that many stores will offer free shipping during the holidays. If you are not already a prime member, there is no need to join now. Amazon just may offer special incentives to get you to become a member. Just keep your eyes peeled to the deals and start early. Black Friday is an exciting time, especially given the state of the world. Shopping for deals is actually exciting. While I consider myself an expert when it comes to Black Friday savings, never forget that time with your loved ones is most important. Keep your cool while you are searching for the best deals. Remember to make it fun and stay fluid. If you get the deal, great. If not, that is fine, too. Happy shopping!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Lifestyle A Moment to Reflect:

How Will the Pandemic Change You for the Better?

by D.M. Simmons

rowing up, I spent a lot of time at my grandparents’ house. They lived about 10 minutes away and their place was my second home. I went there after school as a child, and in high school, nearly every night to call my friends who lived in their phone prefix. In those days, long-distance was a real pain in the you-knowwhat and we did not have Facebook or texting. We did not get to speak until the next day, at school, in many cases and (gasp) that was way too long. Especially when you were dating someone. But I digress… I spent so much time with my grandparents that I knew them as well as my own parents. My grandma, specifically, I spent a lot of time with and there isn’t a day that passes that I do not think of her. She was in many ways my best friend. She knew how to make my favorite sandwich, wash and comb my long red hair and filled her candy bowl with my favorite sweets. She was my comfort and love

and safety whenever the world felt upside down. Some of my favorite memories of being with her is sitting in the kitchen watching as she cooked. I thought nothing of the old ham tin she put food scraps in next to the sink, Cool Whip containers that doubled as her Tupperware, or the jelly jars she drank wine out of. It was normal. This was how she did things. It wasn’t until I was older and started buying my own homeware that I really began to understand what those eccentricities really were. Reminders of a time long since passed, but no less ingrained in my mind.

The Great Depression.

The worldwide economic downturn took place in the 1930s for 43 months, leaving a quarter of the world’s workforce unemployed. For grandma, that meant moving with her parents from the city (Oakland) to

the country (Napa), where they lived off the land — growing and raising everything they needed to eat. It is from this time of financial destitute that millions learned to do more with less and waste was not tolerated. Everything was saved and reused and repurposed. It wasn’t due to personal choice. It was because they had to. That’s where my grandma’s compost ham tin and Tupperware line of Cool Whip tubs was born. She told me about the Depression before when I didn’t finish a meal or tossed something in the trash that wasn’t yet garbage. But I never really got it …until now. The COVID-19 pandemic will change us. As people. As parents. And as a society. Millions have lost their jobs and more will continue as shelter in place orders restrict people from being able to work, due to business closures. Not since WWII has a generation been forced to pull together for the sake of their fellow countrymen (yeah, my grandma did

that too – she was a Rosie the Riveter). While I see the spirit of community, I don’t quite feel it the way I believe the country did in those times. People are still flocking to public spaces. College coeds still flocked by the hundreds to Florida for Spring Break – coronavirus be damned. It has already changed me. When this ends – and it will, I believe, as “this too shall pass” as my grandma always said – I plan to be:

do what I like to do and I am lucky. It has afforded me the ability to work from home and care for my children and have money in my pocket during this crazy time. I need to remember, however, that a career does not define you or your heart. I will work to live, not live to work.

More purposeful with my time outdoors. I was raised in the Sierra Nevada Mountains and moved to the Bay Area after college. I do not spend nearly as much time in the great outdoors as I once did and I miss it. I love this planet and am fiercely protective of it and the creatures that call it home and I need to remember this and instill the same love and appreciation for nature in my children.

More appreciative of the small moments and less stressed by the big ones. Endless bedtime routines at night that seem to stretch on for forever have been a stress point for months, but I will no longer groan, but relish and appreciate those times because those moments will pass and my children will grow up and one day no longer need me to tuck them in, turn on the light or get them a glass of water. The bottom line, they are healthy and every breath we breathe is a gift.

Less worried about the corporate ladder. I have a good career. I have been doing the same thing for 23 years and have had good moments and bad ones. I get paid decently to

Less of a consumer. I have gone without my morning Starbucks latte and mani/pedi now for over a month now and you know what? I didn’t even flinch. No one cares about my toes

and my hands have been washed so many times, the polish would have long since chipped and sitting on the deck at home with my own coffee, breathing in the fresh air, is fine. Actually, it is more than fine, I’ve saved more money than I thought I would and it’s embarrassing how much those things cost now looking back. Now, I am more appreciative of the small things. We’ve baked, watched more movies and shows than normal and yes, had our share of fights given the close quarters. But I am convinced these moments will help strengthen the bonds of my boys and give them something to look back on when life forces them to question their own wants and needs. For that, I am forever grateful. This pandemic has changed my outlook on life. What about you? How will COVID-19 change the way you work, live, parent or love? Let us know. Submit a letter to the editor – we would love to hear from you!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Travel

COVID-19 Travel:

What to Expect at the Airport by Expedia

irports around the world are putting new features and processes in place to help protect you and staff at the airport. Given the number of new safety measures, we recommend getting to the airport earlier than you normally would. Before you depart, make sure you find out what regulations might be in place at your destination. Check for any updates for the airports you’ll be traveling through, too. We also encourage you to check health, safety, and travel advisories often, as circumstances may change.

Social Distancing and Reduced Capacity

Many airports have made modifications to allow travelers and staff to avoid close contact. Features such as contactless check-in, contactless baggage drop-off, and social-distancing floor markers may have been added. In many cases, airport restaurants and shops are still closed, while others have opened with social distancing measures and reduced capacity rules in place.

Sanitization

Many airports have introduced enhanced sanitizing protocols and installed hand sanitizing stations. You may also want to bring your own personal supply of sanitizing wipes so you can wipe down seating, tables and other surfaces you may have prolonged contact with as you travel.

Personal Protective Equipment

You may see airport staff wearing face masks and gloves, especially when it’s difficult to maintain recommended social distancing measures. In some cases, travelers are also required to wear face masks and gloves. We recommend bringing a mask and gloves with you in case they’re required along the way.

Staggered Boarding and Disembarkation

More social distancing when boarding and disembarking means that it may take more time to get on and off your flight. We recommend you get to your gate earlier than you normally would and allow yourself extra transit time during layovers and when you reach your destination.

Temperature Checks and Additional Screening

Some airlines and some destination governments require that you undergo temperature checks or additional screenings before you board. These measures are in place to help slow the spread of COVID-19 and aid in COVID-19 contact tracing. We recommend allowing extra time when you get to the airport to ensure you’re able to comply with any new requirements that may have been put in place. Some airports are offering COVID-19 tests for relevant destinations. Check with your departure airport for more information.

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Travel

Looking Your Best After

Airplane Travel by Courtney Scott

efore COVID-19 and travel restrictions, travel was considered to be glamorous. Especially traveling by airplane. In fact, passengers in the 1960s would dress up for the occasion. Fast forward to 2020 and well, I can’t think of anything less glamorous than the feeling you have after eight hours on a plane. Stiff neck, swollen feet, dehydrated, sleep-deprived and now being stuffed into a mask for the entire flight. Yuck! The truth of the matter is, while the pandemic is not over, many of you have gotten the courage to book a flight to somewhere. With the holidays coming up, I thought it would be good to share a few traveling tips that will leave you looking and feeling great once you land at your destination. Try these suggestions on your next flight, if you want to feel refreshed and

confident when you arrive.

Choose a Disposable Mask for the Flight

It is tempting to stock up on the masks that are all blinged out or ones that match your look, don’t do it. Instead, it is best to be more practical. The baby blue, medical disposable masks are best for travel. Once you arrive at your destination, you can dispose of the mask without the hassle of having to wash it. Besides, if you are on a really long flight, I suggest changing out your mask, midway to feel extra refreshed. You can always wear the fancy mask on the trip while you are out and about.

Chug Water Before You Head to the Airport To prep your body for hours in the air, I recommend downing at least 20 ounces of water before you even

get to the airport. Then, once you pass security, purchase another large bottle of water for the flight.Those tiny cups passed out by the flight attendants are not going to keep you properly hydrated. Usually, you would be able to refill at a filling station. Due to COVID-19 restrictions, many of those refill stations will be out of service.

Use a Night Cream

For long flights I like to apply my night cream on my face rather than my daily moisturizer. It’s thicker and can stand up to the dry air. Apply it once before you board the plane and then re-apply during the flight if needed.

Opt for Minimal Makeup

Mascara and eyeliner can fall into your eyes while you snooze on your flight, causing potential irritation and infection. I like to fly with just some under-eye concealer, brow filler and a pop of lip color, but nothing that will clog pores or bother my eyes.

Wear Spa Socks and Foot Cream

At home, put a generous amount of foot repair cream or heavy ointment

on balls and heels, then treat your feet to some spa socks which are made with olive oil, aloe and other nourishing oils. Take your shoes off inflight so the swelling doesn’t become painful. Your feet will feel silky soft and ready to go.

Get Up and Walk the Aisle

There is nothing like sitting for an entire flight. It is essential that you get up and walk every hour or so. This is a good way to keep the blood flowing and stave off swelling in your feet. It is easy to incorporate your walk into your routine whenever you have to go to the restroom. Choose the restroom that is farthest away from your seat so that you can get a few steps in.

Apply an Oxygenating Mask

Upon arriving at your destination, do a quick 3-5 minute oxygenating mask. Your face will feel instantly energized and your skin will look bright and glowy. No one will ever know you just spent the last eight hours confined to an 18’’ airplane seat. Happy Holidays & Safe Travels!

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Travel

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Crossword Puzzle

Join the Conversation

Visit us online at www.anaverde-magazine.com Anaverde Magazine | November 2020

Snapshots

A Photo Gallery for the Community

by the Community

Anaverde was pkin patch in m pu h h to ug ro th The drive ts came throug e 300 residen m n. io So s. at br es le cc a su ce ce e social distan experience th Jackson nt ra G sy Photo Courte

Haunting at the Gr oves this Hallowe en was not cancelled in the An averde commun ity. However, there were far les s people who cam e out to see the creative, cree py displays. This is wh at makes Anaverde Hills an epic place to live. Photo Courtesy Gr ant Jackson

op good spot to st od bike path. A ho or . hb ig de er ne e av Th beauty that is An and take in the Grant Jackson ur Photo Co tesy Are you an aspiring photographer or simply love to take pics of the Anaverde community? Share them with us! We would love to feature your work. Send to hello@anaverde-magazine.com

Anaverde Magazine | November 2020