Finding Yourself By Tiffany Kameni
What city are you in? What state are you in? Look around you. What street are you on? What's the atmosphere like there? Do you like it there or do you believe it to be just another pit stop in your life? You need not answer the questions, but they were placed there to make a point. Look out of your window. Check out your neighborhood. It is ranked a low crime area, if it is in a suburban area where working class citizens live. Rent does not exist in most suburban areas. You either buy, or commit to a purchase or you can't live there. It is ranked a high crime area if the location is urban, the property is allowed to be rented out, etc. A neighborhood's value is ranked by so many factors including location, market access, surrounding neighborhoods, medium income and neighbor cooperation. For example, in high crime areas, people don't exercise neighborhood watches frequently out of fear of being retaliated against, but in low crime zones, neighborhoods are planked with signs warning any possible 'crime types' that they are active in keeping their neighborhood crime free. Now, let's go off into you. What state of mind are you in? Look around you. Where are you? What is your destination? What is your atmosphere like? Are you joyful, stressed, anxious or determined? Check out your associations. What type of people call and/or visit you? Are they GOD fearing men and women who love the LORD? Or are they gossiping, backbiting, malicious souls with friendly ways? Are they stable? Or do they move around from place to place? How about you? Do you jump from friend to friend? These questions are routed in helping you to locate who you are and where you are. From time to time, we do get off our normal selves and get into a place that we are unfamiliar with. But, let's talk about your consistency for a moment. Where do you live? In the morning, what is your mood like? Your atmosphere (mood and surroundings) can tell you a lot about yourself. Mood I once met a woman who was always grieved and angry. Every time I talked with her, she was going through something. I can not remember one day of talking to her that there was no drama unfolding in her life. So many enemies and people after her, I had to think, “Am I doing something wrong? Because if this is her reward for being righteous and I'm over here at peace, could it mean that she has taken up her armor and stepped on the battlefield for the LORD, while I'm over here surfing the Internet? I prayed for her and the LORD had to open my eyes to see. She was a contentious woman. She knew what the WORD says, yes. She was surrounded by the WORD, yes. But, she was on the battlefield with the WORD, not wanting to surrender to the LORD. And she had bad weather on every side. What about you? What's your common mood? Are you mostly angry, feel like people are 'wronging
you' or easily offended? Or are you a happy individual who flees the scene at the very sight of strife? When there's fight in you, most of the time, it is because you are fighting with you and resisting the LORD. You can't be at peace on a battlefield. Even your naps are short lived because you are bound by so many things. You are beating at the wind and anyone that comes into your presence is in danger of your flesh. You can always tell the type of bird it is when you find it's eggs. A mockingbird is tiny and lays small eggs in 3-10 feet of shrubbery. But, an eagle will lay it's eggs at the top of the highest tree or on a mountain top. A sparrow lays it's eggs in bushes or small trees, as well and line their nests with hair and plants. While a ducks are ground nesters. The size of the eggs, coloration and the details of the nest tell you a lot about the bird type. Just as whatever is being born from you tells you a lot about you. You see, GOD doesn't need to see the egg because HE is your Creator. HE sees your heart. But, what you birth is evidence of what you are. Associations You go to work and there is this lady there always trying to 'locate' you and speak to you from that place. You talk about the LORD, she talks about the LORD. You talk about the boss. She talks about the boss. One Sunday, she's in the lounge ministering to anyone that will listen, because she's fresh out of church and still 'feeling it.' But, come Monday morning, she's back with the gossiping bunch, talking about any and everyone with a pulse. Most of us have known this character. Some of you have been this character. You could recognize a wolf by the pack it hangs out with, as well as it's howl. Even though she devoured many with her gossip, there are many who believed she was a 'woman of GOD' because she spoke of HIM. But, her settings (high crime area of friends) should have alerted you to what she was. Associations can tell you a great deal about a person. They can be dancing around the church every Sunday, but if they are with a bad crowd every other day, you must understand that they are with that crowd by nature. They are in the same realm as that crowd. They come to church because they are afraid of the wrath of GOD! Who's comfortable around you? Who's calling you often? If people curse openly in front of you, it's because their spirit is comfortable with your spirit. If people feel comfortable with gossiping to you, it's because they can detect that residue in you. A criminal would never go to a cop and detail his criminal behavior unless he knew that cop was dirty. Common Run Ins If you're from a small city, like I am, you would be all too familiar with running into people that you know, some that you're happy to see and some that you zig and zag hoping they don't see you. Your infrequent common run ins tell you if you're in a large city (common place) or a small town (uncommon place.) Now, what about your walk in CHRIST or wherever you are. What kind of run ins are common to you? An individual full of strife will always run into strife filled people and situations. I don't care if they are the local neighborhood thug or the Minister of Music who still has some fight left in him. Since we live, spiritually in a certain neighborhood, our eyes only fixate on our neighbors. Sure, you may 'see' others in the natural, but you are more 'in tune' with people that live in the same realm as you, so even though you see them in the natural, you can relate to them. And that is why you are drawn to or repelled from them. A good example would be that man or woman who you know that goes to church faithfully, sometimes more than you go, but every time you look up, they are fighting in the streets, fighting with their spouses, cursing someone out, etc. This is commonplace for them. Because it is where they live. Even
though they are surrounded on every side by the WORD of GOD, they have not fully surrendered to the WORD. They are still trying to negotiate, wanting to keep some flesh alive and sacrifice only what they feel they can live without. They keep running in to strife because they are drawn to it. Whatever you keep running in to is speaking to you as to where you are. If you are running into blessings and love, you're in a good place. If you run into opposition, you still may be in a good place, just going to a better one. But, if you keep getting into arguments, fights, heated debates, if you keep losing your job and you keep seeing turmoil, it is more than likely because you're in a place of turmoil. Your Surroundings When I kept my home half clean, it was because my heart wasn't spotless. Sometimes, the graffiti surrounding us tells us a lot about ourselves. Let's think of urban areas. You know when you're approaching a high crime area because you begin to see run down buildings and a lot of graffiti. You also see a lot of people hanging out, or loitering. (Remember, in low crime areas, you are amongst working class citizens.) You see a lot of people, because there are less people working and where there's little work, there's much crime. Are you surrounded by graffiti? Is your home in chaos? How many people in purpose are around you? Do you sit around people who like to reflect on the 'good-ol-days' because their present days aren't so good? Whatever manifests around you tells you what neighborhood you are in. Getting To a Better Place I don't know about you, but no matter how good my neighborhood is, I want to go to a better one. Because in CHRIST, we continue to elevate. And many people who come into the church have a destination and once they feel they have reached it, they become content and immobile. Don't want to be shifted from their comfort zone. But, if the bird doesn't leave the nest and fly to a better climate during the winter months, it will freeze to death. Therefore, no matter where you are in CHRIST, you should always seek to move higher until you've lost yourself in HIM. How do you get to a better place? Print this checklist to help you from day to day. 1. First, you have to recognize where you are. 2. Be prayerful. Be specific. Whatever you struggle with, lay it at the LORD's feet. 3. Name your struggle and fight back. How so? Whatever hits you, hit it with the WORD of GOD. That is, learn what the scriptures read about that area. If you are a compulsive liar, learn scriptures about lies and liars. This will help to convict you when you're wrong and cause you to challenge you when you're wrong. Trust me, you won't like the feeling, but that's a good thing. People comfortable in their sin are headed towards an uncomfortable eternity. 4. After naming your struggle and learning scripture, every time you are tempted or you act out, speak out loud against that spirit. Speak the WORD of GOD at it. If you continue to do this, that spirit will flee from you. 5. Cut off all wicked communications. Don't know how to tell gossiping Sally that your FATHER says you can't talk to her anymore? Try ministering to her. Don't listen to her gossip, don't listen to her curse, complain or whine. Every time she does, minister to her. Don't baby that spirit. You will begin to see that she will become more agitated with you because she is a baby on milk and you keep putting meat in her belly and it's aggravating her system. And you never know. You just may win that soul for the LORD, but if she resists you, dust your feet and move on. 6. Your mood is like your spiritual temperature. If you're running a fever, something is wrong. If you're in the wrong mood, well, something is wrong. Pay attention to your moods and ask yourself
'why?' Sometimes, it is better to question ourselves than the people that we perceive to be wrong. Often times, you will find your error. The greatest error that brings reproach is expectation. Maybe you expected someone to do something and they did not do it. That wasn't their error, it was yours, since the bible tells us that when we give, don't look to receive. When you see error in you, challenge it and overcome it. Pray on it. Be adamant about winning. If you have to write it down every time you stumble, do so and write down what you did to fight back. After a while you will begin to build better habits and get into better habitats. 7. Keep GOD first. One of the keys that seems to get lost in the hearts of man is positioning. They wake up in the morning, brush their teeth, shower and it's off to work. After a frustrating day, they come home to the same routine. GOD is at the bottom of their list of things. Talks with HIM are reserved for Sundays and Wednesdays only. GOD is the Head. The body cannot function without the Head. Therefore, if you place the head where the belly is, will you not fall? There has to be order in GOD's people and that order is GOD first. Never ever allow yourself to get into the habit of being without HIM. HE's the First, the Last, Alpha and Omega, Beginning and the End. In all things, give HIM of your abundance. That's not just monetary, but that's in all things. You're breathing? Let everything with breathe praise the LORD. You're standing? Stand on HIS WORD? You can talk? Speak of HIS goodness and mercies. Talk to HIM often. You sing? Sing praises unto HIM. And let all this be first. We have to get our eyes off the things of this world, that big house and car that we dream to have. The traveling, the riches and the happiness can all still be hours. But, our eyes should not be fixated on the things of this earth, instead, they should be fixated on storing up treasures for ourselves in Heaven. If you can't see past what you want on earth, you are short sighted. Remember, your location depends on where you choose to live. Make today the day that you choose to live in CHRIST.