RETAIL RANDOMS

BEFORE YOU GO: VALENTINE’S DAY CARDS / OVERWEIGHT CYCLISTS

SPICE UP YOUR VALENTINE’S DAY SELECTION

Valentine’s Day is always a good opportunity to shift some greetings cards as absent-minded shoppers forget that they really should have got their significant other something special, but they’ll just have to settle for a naff card and a bunch of past-their-best flowers from the local convenience store. Well, if you’re looking for something a little more left field to liven up your Valentine’s Day card offer, take a look at the range available from a company called Thortful. Reader discretion advised.

FAT LAD AT THE BACK: WE ALL KNOW ONE

One of the more unsavoury consequences of lockdown has been a spate of new MAMILS (middle aged men in lycra) investing in shiny new pro-standard £3k bikes and squeezing themselves into unreasonably tight shorts to make better use of their extra time at home. We all know a few ageing cyclists with Pelotons, Garmins, those awful knee-high socks and those silly wee peaked caps that point up at the front.

Anyway, we’ve done you all a favour by finding the perfect gift for the new cycling fanatic in your life: a range of ‘Fat Lad at the Back – Powered by Pie’ cycling attire.

Built for the more generously proportioned cyclist, the range is perfect to spare the blushes while still allowing the budding Lance Armstrongs out there to get all the gear and still have no idea.