Retail Randoms

B&Q: SQUIRREL STEALS NUTS AND BOLTS

It’s bad enough that grey squirrels are driving their much cuter red cousins to the brink of extinction and wreaking havoc in Britain’s woodlands, but it now appears the pesky tree rats are taking their antisocial behaviour to a whole new level.

Police in Norwich had to take a break from sweeping up drunks on Saturday night (July 23) when the intruder alarm at a local B&Q store went off.

Investigating officers then found a squirrel in the Outdoor & Garden department helping itself to wild bird food.

Despite having a paunch full of peanuts, the bushytailed bandit managed to evade the pursuing flat-foots – who were no doubt distracted by the prospect of getting 25% off some spa accessories for the station jacuzzi – and made its escape out the store and up a nearby tree.

At which point the cops handed the case over to their colleagues in Special Branch.

MELTDOWN MOONSHINE

You couldn’t make it up. Apparently, a social enterprise led by a team of UK and Ukrainian scientists is producing high quality artisan spirits (or “moonshine” as the makers describe it) in the part of Ukraine abandoned after the Chernobyl nuclear reactor meltdown.

The Chernobyl Spirits Company is not a joke, but the result of an experiment studying the transfer of radioactivity to crops on land that can’t officially be used for agriculture in the main exclusion zone around the reactor.

And it has started producing spirits under the – wait for it – ATOMIK brand. These are available from The Whisky Barrel.

At least 75% of profits from sales will support wildlife conservation efforts in the area and help rebuild communities impacted first by the Chernobyl accident and now by Russian aggression.

That should give you a nice warm glow inside and out.