POSITIVE VIBRATIONS When family, cancer and Indigenous culture intersect by Mark Beamish.

QAAND Top of Mind Positive Vibrations

A mother and daughter discuss Indigenous culture, cancer, and the true value of life. Mark Beamish

KAHN-TINETA HORN WANEEK HORN-MILLER

She’s always been dedicated to promoting Indigenous heritage and communities – a passion she shares with Waneek, her three other daughters and extended family. At various times, she’s been a film actress, political activist, fashion model and civil servant. In 2010, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s a strong, Mohawk woman raised in the Kahnawake Territory near Montreal. Her athletic resume includes co-captain of Canada’s Olympic water polo team at the 2000 Sydney Games, torchbearer at the 2006 Winter Games; and a member of Canada’s Sports Hall of Fame. Today, she calls herself a ‘Warrior Woman’, motivator and businesswoman. Recently, our LGFB team chatted with the mother-daughter duo.

What was your reaction to the cancer diagnosis?

K: When they called me from the hospital and told me the results of the biopsy, I just went blank. I didn’t know what to think, I didn’t even know what to do.

W: I found out my mom was diagnosed with cancer from my oldest sister, It was like this sudden shock went right through my whole body.

How did your family and community act as Caregivers?

W: I'm really lucky. I come from a big family: there's four sisters, but we have a lot of other extended sisters and nieces, and my husband also was in medical school at the time….

So, it wasn’t just me. My oldest sister really took the lead…. And she said, ‘Mom needs to be around happiness, she needs to be around life.’ We had to be strong, like she was always there for us…

Talking to my sisters, we all said we need to show up as a team and I think, hopefully we did that. We all tried to be there for Mom – and each other.

K: I sat quietly for a couple of days, and when I came to terms with the diagnosis I said, ‘Well I'm getting these vibrations from my children, my grandchildren and they're all dealing with it well, and I realized this was the solution.’

We share these vibrations, this connection. I've always told my kids this is our power. This is the power of the family. The power of the people…. We’re given that by creation. That helped me a lot.

I also asked my best friend, ‘Do you think you could come with me to my treatments?’ and she said yes.

Click here to see our full interview with Waneek and Kahn-Tineta.

Having someone you love be so close to the edge, reminds you that life is so precious.

What kind of self-care did you practise?

K: My oldest daughter was the one that said, ‘Well now you must start exercising.’ I said OK, and I did it. Then I said, ‘I will try and write one story a day, for a year.’ And I tried to do that – I didn’t succeed completely, but I did a lot of great stories. That probably did me a world of good.

One of my grandchildren asked me, ‘Do you have any secrets to life?’ I said, ‘Well I never abuse anybody, I never let anybody abuse me and I take care of my appearance.’

What would you say to anyone beginning their journey?

K: I like to give them my complete cancer story and explain everything that I did, and then I say, ‘OK, now you have to figure it out for yourself.’

W: I would ask, ‘What can I do for you?’ because really that's all you can do. Be that person that helps. And that's how families get through cancer diagnoses—whether family by blood or family by choice.

My mom is always full of encouragement – no matter what someone is going through. She always has a story and this way of making me feel like I can handle it. All my life, she would say to me, ‘Be good to yourself, be kind to yourself.’ Trust that you have the knowledge or the energy to support each other. Start saying to people, “You’ve got this!”

How has your Mom’s journey changed you?

W: One of the greatest gifts, if there can be a gift from this experience, is that it made me stop and do regular check-ins with my friends.

That's what cancer teaches you: don't wait until someone gets sick, send them a card, call them...because having someone you love be so close to the edge, reminds you the value of life and life is so precious.

We all came together to help our mom and now she's in her 82nd year and as vibrant as ever. She keeps telling me ‘I’ve another 20, 25 years to live’, she says. ‘What am I going to do for 25 years?’ I'm like, ‘I don't know, cause a ruckus, I'm sure!’ (Laughter).

Mukluks are an important gift in many Indigenous cultures that signifies a new journey in life. Waneek gave this beautiful pair of warm, Manitobah® Mukluks to her mom for her cancer journey. She proudly wore them during every radiation treatment. “It got me through it,” Kahn-Tineta remembers.