maternity & infant by Ashville Media Group

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MATERNITY & BABY STYLE FINDS

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1 SPRING 2017

Win!

Contents

TWO-NIGHT GETAWAY IN DUNBOYNE CASTLE HOTEL & SPA, CO MEATH! PAGE 61

On The Cover

THE BURNING TOPIC: MATERNITY LEAVE We reveal the results of our reader survey on maternity leave and look at why parents of preterm babies are looking for an overhaul of the system.

HOW TO GET PREGNANT You mightn’t have given your monthly cycle much thought before trying for a baby, but knowing what’s going on can help you get pregnant faster. Here’s all you need to know.

SLEEP DEPRIVATION We’re in total agreement – losing sleep on a regular basis is a form of torture. One reader tells us her experience and gives us her top tips on getting through it.

GETTING RID OF SOOTHER In an exclusive extract from her new book, GINA FORD gives us her advice on getting rid of the soother (or dee-dow as it’s known in our house – Ed) KIDS & WEIGHT ISSUES We have a problem with childhood obesity in Ireland – but how do you raise the issue of weight with children without making them paranoid?

MI Spring 2017_Contents.indd 1

31 Features

Style

MATERNITY From spring’s nautical trend to stealing Molly Sims’ pregnancy style, we have all the best maternity pieces here.

BABY & CHILD The very best first outfits and cool toddler denim style, this is your guide to dressing your little ones this season!

YOU It’s all about the ruffles!

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT... PREGNANCY & SMEAR TESTS What happens when your smear test letter arrives when you’re pregnant? Should you have a test after giving birth? Find out with our must-have guide here.

PLANNING A NURSERY Probably the most exciting part of planning for a baby is designing his/her first room! We talk to the experts about what you need to know about planning a nursery.

ADDING TO YOUR FAMILY JEN HOGAN looks at some of the things you have to consider when planning a new addition to your family. Plus, how do you know when your family is complete?

PRODUCT GUIDE TO: DOUBLE TRAVEL SYSTEMS Whether it’s twins, ‘Irish twins’ or even siblings, a double buggy is a necessity for many families these days. The good news is that there’s more choice than ever before!

08/02/2017 14:42

2 SPRING 2017

Contents

THE BREAST ADVICE NUK breastfeeding advisor CLIODNA GILROY on the importance of Vitamin D for our kids, whether you’re breastor bottle-feeding.

BLOG WE LOG What made us laugh or cry in blogland this season.

Regulars

67 52

A-Z OF SUPPLEMENTS Did you ever wonder what those mysterious names were on the back of your multivitamin? Find out in our ultimate A-Z guide to vitamins and minerals. DATE NIGHT AT HOME Baby too little to leave? No babysitter for the older kids? No worries! There’s no need to let your relationship suffer once you’ve nailed the art of a date night at home! HOW MOTHERHOOD HAS CHANGED The more things change, the more they stay the same – they could have written this about motherhood, as we found out when talking to different generations of mums.

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30 Opinion

A DOCTOR’S PERSPECTIVE DR SINEAD BEIRNE looks at the subject of pelvic floor exercises.

MUMMY MY WAY One reader tells us her experience of pregnancy after miscarriage.

DAD’S DIARY A fairy has taken over NICK WILKINSON’s house – and mind...

TOP TEN What’s on our shopping list this season.

NEWS All the latest news, reviews and products.

COMPETITION TIME WIn a luxurious two-night getaway to Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa!

ANNABEL KARMEL Make your own healthy versions of fast-food favourites.

76 77

STORE DIRECTORY A list of fashion stockists. SPRING HEALTH SPECIAL All your spring health advice in one place.

26 08/02/2017 14:42

3 EDITOR’S LETTER

Welcome! As I write this, there’s a wind howling outside and I’m slowly defrosting after dropping the kids to school and crèche. On days like this, it’s hard to think of brighter days ahead – and indeed, spring fashion and outdoor activities. But just when it seems that winter is never going to end, suddenly those birds are chirping more than ever, daffodils begin to appear and I’ll be able to get through an entire GAA session without having to sit on the radiator for at least two hours afterwards. This is our spring issue, and as usual, it’s packed full of information to help you make the most of the new season. From the top new season fashion for you and your little ones (including the most ADORABLE first outfits in our newborn trend – see page 30), to our spring health section (which features a special on chickenpox – rampant at this time of year), this is your must-have guide to Spring 2017. We also have some really great features for you this issue. If you’re planning a baby, our guide to fertility and conception on p34 is a must read, while those of you already

THE TEAM

expecting can start planning for the new arrival with our guide to designing a nursery on p40. On p44, we look at the subject of family size, and when you know that enough is enough! Plus, we have more personal experiences than ever before. On p46, read mum-of-one Carla Gower’s experience with a baby that just will not sleep (we’ve all been there), and her expert advice on how to get through it. We also welcome two new experts to our panel of advisors – see our health section on p77 for top advice from paediatric dietitian Cathy Monaghan and dentist Lyndsey McTavish. I hope you enjoy the read – remember that we’re there for you, 24/7, on our website www.maternityandinfant.ie, with daily features and news, weekly competitions and much, much more. Sign up to our weekly ezine to make sure you get all the latest straight into your inbox. Have a fabulous spring, and see you again in the summer!

Penny Gray Editor

Editor: Penny Gray Editorial Intern: Ellen Flynn Editorial Manager: Mary Connaughton Creative Director: Jane Matthews Design: Antoinette Sinclair, Jennifer Reid Photography & Illustrations: Getty Images, Thinkstock Production Manager: Mary Connaughton Sales Director: Paul Clemenson Email editorialdesk@ashville.com or write to maternity & infant, Ashville Media, Old Stone Building, Blackhall Green, Dublin 7; Tel: (01) 432 2200; Web: www.maternityandinfant.ie All rights reserved. Every care has been taken to ensure that the information contained in this magazine is accurate. The publishers cannot, however, accept responsibility for errors or omissions. Reproduction by any means in whole or in part without the permission of the publisher is prohibited. © Ashville Media Group 2017. All discounts, promotions and competitions contained in this magazine are run independently of maternity & infant. The promoter/advertiser is responsible for honouring the prize. ISSN 2009 1931

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MY PICKS THIS ISSUE 18

CLASSIC RHYMES

TRAVEL IN STYLE

PRETTY IN PINK

I have a bit of a weakness for classic children’s books, and thankfully it seems that publishers agree with me. This beautiful set of nursery rhymes is joining other classics like the Flower Fairies and Winnie the Pooh on my bookshelves this spring.

I can’t get over how much double travel systems have changed in the few years since I was buying one. One that caught my eye was the brand-new Cúpla Duo (€599) from Baby Elegance, which is designed to suit whatever combo you have – twins, Irish twins or toddlers!

My best friend just had her first baby, a little girl, so we’ve all gone a bit crazy on the newborn baby girl clothes. I just can’t get enough of little dungaree sets – how cute is this pink number from Mothercare (€17.99).

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Announcing the arrival of Our bigger & better baby range!

Made with top quality organic ingredients, our delicious Lidlâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Uns IMPORTANT NOTICE: Breastfeeding is best for babies as it is perfectly suited to nourish infants and protect them from illnesses such as ear infections, stomach upsets, diabetes, eczema and obesity.Follow-on milk is only for babies over 6 months, as part of a mixed diet, and should not be used as a breastmilk substitute before 6 months. If you wish to use this product before 6 months, we advise that you consult your healthcare professional. It is recommended that all formula milks be used on the advice of a doctor, midwife, health visitor, public health nurse, dietitian, pharmacist or other professional responsible for maternal and child care, based on babyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s individual needs. Growing up milk should be used as part of a healthy balanced diet.

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fruit purees are ideal as a tasty breakfast or snack for your little ones.

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08/02/2017 30/01/2017 17:19 17:30

10 TOP PRODUCTS

M&I

d e t n a Mo s t W What’s on our shopping list this spring…

SLEEP SOLUTIONS One of the most popular subjects here is sleep – and most importantly, how to get baby to sleep! So it’s no surprise that our very own sleep expert Lucy Wolfe is writing her own book. Entitled The Baby Sleep Solution, and published by Gill Books, Lucy’s practical advice-led book on solving sleep issues is published on 24th March. See our next issue for an exclusive feature!

PREPPING FOR SUMMER It may be freezing outside but we’re looking ahead to the brighter days of summer. The new range from Frugi is inspired by long, lazy, hazy days at the beach (we can but dream), and is full of bright prints in organic cotton for both boys and girls. Put simply, this collection makes us smile! See welovefrugi.com for the full range.

3 TOYS ONLINE We’re always on the lookout for something a little more special than the usual plastic toys, and Irish website www.mykid.ie fits the bill perfectly. With a mission to sell ‘quality toys for quality kids,’ the site sells top European toys and games for babies and children,

MATERNITY ESSENTIALS

including plush toys, wooden puzzles

We spend a lot of time at M&I HQ

and educational games. One of our

discussing maternity style, and the

favourites is Discoverer’s Meadow,

best places to pick up items that are

an innovative toy for babies that

fashionable yet functional during

stimulates the senses – plus, if you pull

your pregnancy. But when to comes

an animal on one side, the animal on

to the crunch, the maternity clothes

the other side moves too! Cute and

that will get the most use are the

clever and only €18.99! See the full

comfy, stretchy ones – those pieces

range at www.mykid.ie

that you will live in for the first few weeks of motherhood too. So hats off to Mothercare who have produced a wide selection of fab yoga pants, leggings and stretch jersey tops. We love these yoga pants, only €23.99.

HELPING OTHERS Hats off the JoJo Maman Bébé, who are starting up once again collections for their From a Mother to Another (FAMTA) initiative in February. The aim is to reduce the shocking levels of clothing waste that ends up in a landfill whilst helping those in need in the UK and Ireland with distribution via Trussell Trust food banks in the UK and Cross Care in Ireland, and thousands of Syrian refugees living in Lebanon. Stores in Cork and Dublin are collecting; for full details of how to donate visit http:// www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/FAMTA

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08/02/2017 14:52

BABYMOON IN FARNHAM

7 TOP PRODUCTS

HEART YOUR CARDS Looking for a cute gift and a way to recycle/keep those gorgeous cards? A Heart Your Cards frame is a unique way to display all the cards you receive from big occasions like a baby’s birth. Aisling at Heart Your Cards simply takes the cards and turns them into a piece of art. Choose from a variety of styles and customise with colours, names, and dates. Even better, pre-paid gift boxes are available. See www.facebook.com/heartyourcards or email Aisling at heartyourcards@gmail.com

We reckon we’ve found the best spot for a fab babymoon – the gorgeous Radisson Blu Farnham Estate in Co Cavan. Most of the treatments in the stunning spa can be modified when pregnant and there’s even a menu of pregnancy specific treatments. We’d recommend you make a weekend of it by booking into the hotel and enjoying dinner at the gorgeous Botanica restaurant that night.

For more information, visit www.

farnhamestate.com.

BRIGHT EYES We’re big Clarins fans here at maternity & infant, thanks to their fusion of very wearable colours and innovative products. We love their spring collection, which focuses on gorgeous skin and cheekbones, and dazzling eye makeup. The standout product has to be the 4 Colour all-in-one Pen (Limited Edition), €36, which reminds us of

NATURAL FEEDING

SNEAK PEAK...

Breast is best when it comes to

At the end of March, urban pushchair brand

feeding baby, but if you decide to

Quinny will be launching the Zapp X, a range

move on or take a break by feeding

of highly compact and comfortable pushchairs.

with expressed milk, you’ll naturally

The Zapp Flex Plus and Zapp Flex are both

want to find the most breast-friendly

beautiful and functional, whilst the Zapp Xpress

teat possible. NUK’s First Choice+

provides the perfect on-the-go solution. The

those BIC multi-colour

bottles are contoured for easy

entire collection features a comfortable seat

biro from yesteryear – in a

grip, but it’s the NUK First Choice+

that reclines both ways, four large puncture-free

good way! Available from

teat that deserves the headlines.

wheels, a closed handlebar for easy one-hand

Clarins counters now.

Asymmetrically shaped like a nipple,

steering and 16 standard colour packages to

they’re so close to nature that

choose from. Available to buy direct from www.

babies take to them immediately.

quinny.com at the end of March.

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8 ONLINE

maternityandinfant.ie SPRING HAS SPRUNG!

Every day we post up new topical features on everything from entertaining your kids during the holidays (midterm and Easter are looming) to dealing with seasonal health woes (chicken pox, we’re looking at you!). Log on to our home page each day for the latest, or keep up to date through our Facebook page! www.maternityandinfant.ie

WHAT’S TRENDING? @maternityinfant

C omp et i t i ons g alore!

We just can’t get enough of these hilarious parenting tweets!

Each week we post a brand-new competition for our readers – recent prizes include vouchers for Smyths and Argos, breastfeeding sets from MAM, a spa trip to Farnham Estate, and an iCandy travel system! www.maternityandinfant. ie/competitions

@DadandBuried When my 6yo gets home from school he’s somehow too tired to do his homework but NOT too tired to talk - nonstop! - for five straight hours. @ReasonsMySonCry “I’m only going to say this once” is something that I like to say 8 or 9 times a day.

FR E E w eek ly ez i ne! Sign up to our weekly ezine to be the first to hear about our latest competitions, offers and features, delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday evening! Sign up through our homepage, www.maternityandinfant.ie, today!

CONNECT

CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF US? WRITE OR EMAIL maternity & infant, Old Stone Building, Blackhall Green, Dublin 7. editorialdesk@ashville.com Facebook.com/maternityandinfant Twitter.com/maternityinFant

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@ramblinma Before kids: I want to travel the world. After kids: I just want to get through one meal without someone talking about poop.

HEALTH ADVICE A mainstay of the maternity&infant website is our top health advice, from fertility to pregnancy to baby & toddler illnesses to nutrition and yummy recipes. We get the best advice from the top experts – and it’s available to you 24/7! www.maternityandinfant. ie/lifestyle/food-health

MUM QUERIES

If you have a question you’d like to put to our experts or our mum readers, go on to www.maternityandinfant.ie/ask-m-i. We post our questions anonymously on our Facebook page for input from our mum readers. Look out for our new Ask The Expert section, coming soon to www.maternityandinfant.ie!

@simoncholland I opened the dishwasher and it’s full of clean dishes and I’m scared my wife is going to know that I know. @MamaFizzles 11yo said he can’t wait to grow up so he won’t have to do chores anymore. I had forgotten how cathartic it is to laugh until you cry. @UnfilteredMama Despite my 100% track record for accuracy, nobody in this house believes me when I say, “Careful someone’s going to get hurt!” @TheCatWhisprer There should be a Fitbit to track how many times you bend over to pick up the crayon your toddler dropped at the restaurant.

08/02/2017 14:57

M&I

ESSENTIALS: 9 THINGS

9 SURPRISING FACTS ABOUT A NEWBORN

NATURAL SWIMMERS Newborns instinctively hold their breath when underwater, and even splash with their arms and legs SHORT SIGHTED

Very small babies can only see about 20-30cm in front of their

faces, the rest is a blur of colors.. THEM BONES... Babies are born with about 300 bones; an adult has just 206. TINY TUMMIES

A newborn’s tummy is the size of a hazelnut. Bubbles of wind take up valuable space, hence the need to wind regularly.

5 NATURAL SMELLS Your familiar natural scent is loved by your baby, so be sure to avoid strong perfumes after giving birth.

SLEEP TIME A small baby needs up to 18 hours of sleep a day, taken as a series of short naps.

7 ADDICTED TO YOU The smell of a newborn triggers the same sense of craving in a mum as food does when hungry. HEART TO HEART

When a mum and a newborn look at each other in the eye, their heart rates coordinate in seconds.

BRAIN POWER A newborn’s brain takes up 10 per cent of his total body weight when born.

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09/02/2017 14:56

10 ESSENTIALS: PREGNANCY

CAN I KEEP RUNNING DURING PREGNANCY?

HOSPITAL BAG ESSENTIALS

So you’re pregnant – congratulations! You know that exercise is good, but if you’re an avid runner, can you keep up your usual routine? Yes, but with some adjustments, says DR JOANNA HELCKE. If you are a regular runner or jogger then the likelihood is that when you fall pregnant you will wish to carry on with the form of exercise that you love. You will recognise the benefits of exercising outdoors; being able to slip out of your back door and straight into your workout whatever the time of day; building up your stamina so that running becomes a time for mental space rather than a physical chore. Maintaining cardiovascular fitness throughout pregnancy will help you through labour and enable you to recover more rapidly postnatally. All these qualities stand true in pregnancy just so long as running is still right for you, your body and your baby in pregnancy.

What to watch out for: ✹ Running is tough on the body: your joints are more vulnerable during pregnancy and you are more prone to injury. So if you carry on running but become aware of niggles you have not experienced before (perhaps the knees or the hips) then this is a sign to ease off and take things down to a brisk walking pace. ✹ Remember pregnancy exercise rule #2: you should avoid overheating when exercising in pregnancy. Running and jogging can make you sweaty and breathless so moderate your speed to avoid this happening. ✹ Pregnancy places a great deal of strain on the pelvic floor muscles and so do running and jogging. If you choose to carry on jogging through part of pregnancy then be doubly sure to do daily pelvic floor exercises (which you should be doing anyway). If you start to notice that jogging makes you need to dash to the loo then it is time to remove the impact and stick to power walking. ✹ However much you wish to keep up running in pregnancy you are

MI Spring 2017_News Pregnancy.indd 10

All the attention is on baby’s first clothes, but what about you? Here are four essentials you must pack in your bag:

Robe and nightdress, €39.99, Mothercare For walking around in early labour

going to have to simply listen to your body and when the tell tale signs say that enough is enough, it’s time to move on to other forms of more gentle exercise. ✹ As your bump grows, have a look into buying a pregnancy support belt. This will enable you to carry on running without the discomfort of your bump being bounced around on impact. A support belt may well give you a precious month or two extra of running in pregnancy.

Any alternatives: ✹ Deep water aquajogging is one of the best alternatives to running because it mimics the same movement pattern but without any impact given that you are suspended in deep water. This is why it is widely used by injured athletes who need to maintain their fitness levels without adversely affecting their injury. To aquajog you will need a specialist flotation belt that ideally goes around your waist although as pregnancy progresses you will have to allow the belt to ride up under the arms so as to leave space for your bump. Make sure that you stay

very upright in the water and avoid the temptation of tipping forwards. To keep this upright position you will need to use your deep abdominal muscles to help you stabilise. The beauty of this alternative to running is that you will not overheat as the water will take away the excess heat from your body leaving you cool, even if you are working at quite an intense level. ✹ Power walking is another excellent option when running becomes too much. To help maintain your fitness levels, include hills and vary the speed so that it becomes a gentle interval workout.

Christy Supreme Hygro Towel Range, from €14, Littlewoods Ireland Go for a dark colour – trust us...

Nursing pjs, €27.99, Mothercare For post-birth and the inevitable visitors!

Dr Joanna Helcke is the author of The Little Book of Making You Exercise Safe For Pregnancy, £7 from www. fitbumpbox.com

Boob hi-cut maternity brief, €24.53, www. naturalbabyshower.co.uk Again, dark colour is a good idea!

09/02/2017 15:52

11 ESSENTIALS: PREGNANCY

WAYS TO EASE BACK PAIN IN PREGNANCY Back pain is very common in pregnancy, especially as you enter the third trimester, thanks to the weight of your growing baby and the hormone relaxin, which causes your ligaments to loosen. But there are a number of ways to ease an aching back... There are two types of back pain in pregnancy: lumbar pain and posterior pelvic pain. Lumbar pain is similar to the lower back pain experienced by women who are not pregnant. This type of pain usually increases by prolonged posture positions like standing, sitting, or repetitive lifting, and tenderness may also be present in the muscles along the spine during pregnancy. Posterior pelvic pain (in the back of the pelvis) is four times more prevalent than

lumbar pain in pregnancy. It is a deep pain felt below and to the side at the waistline, and/or below the waistline on either side across the tailbone. Posterior pelvic pain can be brought on and heightened by rolling in bed, climbing stairs, sitting and rising from a seated position (such as getting in and out of cars, bathtubs, bed), lifting, twisting, bending forward and running and walking. Try these five ways to help ease back pain:

Exercise

Strengthening exercises like Pilates, swimming and aquanatal classes can help prevent, ease and control your back pain by working to strengthen your core abdominal muscles to hold yourself better. However, if you were not used to exercise prior to your pregnancy, consult your doctor before trying any exercise.

Be mindful

Being careful of what you are lifting while pregnant will also help reduce potential pain. If you have to lift something, hold it close to your body, bend your knees rather than your back and try not to twist.

Change your sleeping position

Sleeping on your side with a wedge-like pillow under your tummy may help ease pain. A warm bath may also relieve back pain.

Improve your posture

Trying not to slump over when sitting, twist when lifting or staying in the same position for too long and generally being aware of your posture will help ease and help control back pain. You can use a lumbar roll or cushion for your back when sitting, and standing or sitting up straight and arching your back now and again as much as is comfortable, as well as taking regular breaks to walk around, will also help prevent and control any pain.

Have a massage

A massage is also a great way of relieving any back tension and pain. Ask your partner to gently massage your lower back, or visit a qualified massage therapist. Remember to tell the therapist that you’\re pregnant so he/she can bear that in mind when using certain types of massage moves and aromatherapy oils.

NUK is a registered trademark of MAPA GmbH, Germany * For optimally combining bottle and breastfeeding. Moral et al. BMC Pediatrics 2010, 10:6. For further information go to http://nuk.com/research

Fully satisfied without the tummy pains. Inspired by

NATURE

Helps to prevent colic thanks to improved vent:

the NUK First Choice+ Baby Bottle. Inspired by nature: the NUK First Choice+ Teat is modelled on a mother’s nipple as she breastfeeds and therefore optimal for everyone who wants to both bottle and breastfeed naturally. It has an extra-soft baglet which adapts perfectly to the palate and is particularly well accepted by infants – that is even clinically proven*. Its improved vent helps to ensure a natural flow of liquid, along with satisfied babies with no tummy pains. Find out more at nuk.com

NUK. Understanding Life. www.nuk.com

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06/02/2017 17/10/2016 10:20 13:58

09/02/2017 15:52

12 ESSENTIALS: BABY

HOW I SURVIVED THE FIRST WEEK OF MOTHERHOOD

HOW TO SOOTHE A CRYING BABY

It’s exhilarating, exhausting, terrifying and awe-inspiring – all in equal measures! We ask some of our readers how exactly they managed to get through the first week with a brand-new baby… “Everyone tells you to sleep when the baby sleeps, but I found I was too wired for the first week or two to do this. But I was also exhausted from the birth. My top tip would be to accept all the help you can get. My partner used to take over for a few hours at night to let me have a few hours’ rest. It was invaluable.” Joanne, mum of two

There’s nothing worse than hearing your baby crying. Obviously if there is a physical issue, talk to your GP or public health nurse. But if it’s general fussiness, try one of these remedies:

“Don’t be afraid to tell people you need a little bit of time to get into a routine and to postpone visiting for a week or two. Bringing a baby home for the first time is a massive, massive thing and it’s not easy. Give yourself a few weeks to get used to your new life and don’t feel under pressure to ‘entertain’ people if they pop over.” Mary, mum of three “If you’re reading this and pregnant, the best piece of advice I can give you is to stock the freezer up with ready meals and easy stuff to eat in the fridge. Think soups, crackers, cheese, eggs – anything you can grab and eat. You’ll be too busy and tired to cook, but unless you’re lucky enough to have someone with you 24/7, you’ll need to feed yourself (especially if you’re breastfeeding). Easy stuff that you can bung into the oven is invaluable.” Marie, mum of one “Get any thoughts of routines out of your head, at least for the first few weeks! Adjusting to motherhood is a huge deal for you – but can you imagine how your baby must feel, adjusting to life outside the womb? Do whatever your baby needs to be soothed. If that means being attached to you for 24 hours a day, so be it. Don’t even think about ‘spoiling’ or ‘bad habits’ right now. Plenty of time for that!” Penny, mum of two

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Give a warm bath The warm water instantly soothes many babies; try a gentle massage afterwards too.

Hold your baby close Nothing soothes your baby like your presence. Hold your baby close to your chest, or perhaps try a carrier.

Go for a walk or drive “Don’t be a hero. If you’re struggling with lack of sleep, get help. If you’re struggling with breastfeeding, talk to your public health nurse or enlist the services of a lactation consultant. If you’re feeling down in the dumps, talk to your GP. Nobody expects you to be perfect straight off the bat. Just like everything else, motherhood needs to be learned and it’s tough going. I have four kids and I’m definitely still learning.” Jo, mum of four “Focus on your baby for the first few weeks. You’re going to be feeding around the clock, and getting used to tricky tasks like changing and bathing. Don’t worry about silly things like cleaning or thank you cards. If those tasks really

bother you, get someone to do them for you. But no one expects you to do anything but look after your baby and yourself for the first few weeks.” Wendy, mum of two “I was completely unprepared for how tired and sore I’d be after the birth. In fairness, I had a long and hard labour, and I was fairly bruised and battered afterwards. But I don’t think I was unusual in feeling sore for the first few weeks. Don’t forget to look after yourself. If you’re prescribed painkillers, take them. Use pillows, stay in bed if you have to, and get some help in lifting and carrying baby and tricky things like car seats. You’ll bounce back in no time, don’t worry, but you must take the time to heal and recover.” Tracey, mum of two

The movement and fresh air can be soothing for both you and your baby – and some babies fall straight asleep in the car.

Sing or dance Lullabies are a tried and tested way of soothing a baby. Or try holding your baby close and gently swaying or dancing (be sure not to shake your baby though)

Distraction Try showing your baby a toy or a bright book to take his mind off whatever’s bothering him. A mobile above the cot can also help.

08/02/2017 16:28

REASONS TO TAKE BABY TO SWIM LESSONS

The Apologetic Tooth wants to say “sorry...”

Drowning is a leading cause of accidental death among children and toddlers, so it’s essential that you teach your children the basics about swimming. You don’t have to wait until they can walk – babies naturally love the water and can pick up valuable skills before their first birthday! For instance, younger children are usually less resistant to floating on their backs, a key life-saving strategy.

Swimming improves cognitive functioning The action of swimming requires your baby to use both sides of the body in cross-patterning movements, which helps to grow the part of the brain that governs communication, feedback, and spatial awareness. A four-year study of over 7,000 children in Australia found that swimming children were more advanced in physical and mental development when compared to their non-swimming peers.

Lessons may save your life

Swimming lessons teach life-saving skills as well as confidence in the water. They also teach respect for the water, which is very important. Younger children tend to be less naturally fearful of the water, so the earlier you start, the better.

Swimming improves confidence

The social aspect of swimming helps your baby develop confidence, as well as the valuable skills. In a German study, children who had taken swim lessons from the age of two months to

four years were better adapted to new situations, had more self-confidence, and were more independent than non-swimmers.

Lessons are a great bonding experience

It’s widely documented that mum and baby classes are great for bonding and socialising with other mums – classes like Waterbabies and Turtle Tots are no different.

Swimming is great exercise…

…for both you and baby! Swimming strengthens your baby’s lungs, while stimulating the five senses – taste, smell, touch, sight and sound.

Always read the label

He knows he sometimes makes your baby cry, so he wants you to know about Nelsons® Teetha® Teething Granules with soothing Chamomilla.

The natural choice for Mums. Available from all good pharmacies and health food stores. Homeopathic medicine for teething pain relief.

242023_2P_Teetha_MI.indd 1 MI Spring 2017_News Baby.indd 13

03/02/2017 09:39 08/02/2017 16:28

14 ESSENTIALS: TODDLER

FUN ACTIVITIES FOR YOUR CURIOUS TODDLER Toddlers love exploring their world. In an extract from her new set of activity cards, DR PIXIE MCKENNA explains five fun activities to do with your toddler – and they don’t require fancy equipment or lots of money!

FIVE OF THE BEST: RAIN JACKETS

Floral jacket, €26, Next

2B colour block jacket, €13, Penneys

Go on a nature walk

Lastly, let them lick the bowl! Top tip: Safety is key. Set up ‘no-go zones’ eg hot oven, sharp knives.

Indoor play is fun, but it’s great to get out and explore, and a wonderful way to tap into the senses! Toddlers can become observers of nature and love to interact with their surroundings. They can collect daisies, leaves, feathers or any other treasures they can find. Sometimes I hide a chocolate coin in the grass and the excitement when they discover it is incredible! Make sure they don’t touch or eat anything dangerous and wash hands thoroughly on your return. Top tip: Make a collage with the treasures found!

Here’s a good way of putting stray buttons to use! Start with two different colour options for your toddler to sort into different colour groups, sizes and patterns. Children soon realise that things can be both alike and different. Once they have mastered two colours, add a third. Incorporate counting – the first stepping stone towards maths – foster active learning! Supervise it to avoid things going in their mouths! Top tip: Egg boxes are great places to stash the buttons.

Bake a cake!

If cooking skills are limited, choose something you have mastered before like a basic sponge. Get your little chef to break the eggs, cut the butter (with a butter knofe) or sift the flour. They’ll use numerical skills for ingredients and fine motor skills for moxing and pouring. Working through a recipe together shows them where food begins. They’ll learn the concept of concentration, time and patience.

MI Spring 2017_News Toddler.indd 14

Get sorted!

Shhh... it’s the library

A visit to the library is not lazy parenting, but hugely beneficial! Explain to your toddler what they should expect before you visit. As well as the fun things, they have to respect the rules of speaking quietly, walking (not running) and being patient. Listening to stories helps speech and language development and use of phonics. A toddler will begin to understand letters even if

they’re unable to read or write. Plus, the exposure to lots of different books is invaluable. Top tip: The presence of other children helps with socialisation and play.

Tidy up time

This doesn’t sound like much fun, but it can be! It’s educational and encourages toddlers to sort things and place them in order. Communicate what needs to be done in words and actions and don’t aim for perfection. Give them a few minutes’ warning so they know to expect it and work together. Cleaning up teaches them problem-solving skills and a sense of responsibility. If a child is old enough to get a toy out, he is old enough to put it back. Top tip: Use a timer to make it more competitive: on your marks, get set, tidy! Dr Pixie’s Activities Your Toddler Will Love & Dr Pixie’s Activities Your Baby Will Love each contain 40 flashcards for on-the-go inspiration. Published by Igloo Books (www.igloobooks.com).

Colour block lined jacket, €23.99, Little Bird @ Mothercare

Fisherman’s jacket, €49, JoJo Maman Bebe

Girls’ bird-print raincoat, €43.75, Hatley @ Childrensalon

08/02/2017 16:36

15 ESSENTIALS: FAMILY

THE ART OF DECLUTTERING Keeping your house free of clutter is believed to be as important for your mental health as it is for your surroundings – and when you’re pregnant or have young children, it can be even more important than ever as FIONA HALL from Consciously Clearing explains... There is a lot to do when you’re expecting a baby. You have to pick a buggy, assemble your cot, find the perfect baby bag, stock up on blankets as well purchase those teeny, tiny clothes for your bundle of joy to wear. Then there is the matter of where to put everything! Decluttering your home before the birth of your child clears out much needed space for this new chapter in your life. Letting go of those possessions that you no longer like, wear, use or even need creates space in your life for what matters now and space for what is to come. ✹ Items needed for a newborn quickly seep into EVERY room so you will need varying degrees of space in every room. Decluttering now before the baby comes will mean you are not constantly shifting furniture, moving objects or tripping over items. ✹ It can be exasperating and disheartening after another night of broken sleep to not be able to find what you need to get the day started. Decluttering before the birth and putting simple strategies in place can help you going forward to locate what you need, when you need it so you can focus on what really matters.

Binning tiny things Decluttering with parents of infants is definitely a more emotional experience. Little bibs, hats and babygros, now outgrown, remind you of how time is passing so quickly, too quickly. Beautiful outfits, again outgrown, remind you of many wonderful memories and special occasions. As an accredited pyschotherapist/ counsellor and mum of two, I understand that these clothes are more than just possessions, they are your hopes, your dreams and a whole lot more. Sorting through what should go and what should

MI Spring 2017_News Family.indd 15

WAYS TO BOOST YOUR FAMILY FINANCES

Track your spending

Write down everything you spend in a week, including little treats and coffees. You’ll see immediately where your money is going and where you can cut back.

Give yourself a spending budget

The easiest way to keep those little purchases to a minimum is to give yourself “pocket money” each week or month. Once that’s gone, there’s no more money for miscellaneous purchases. stay can be hard but decluttering does not necessarily mean that everything needs to be given away.

Little masterpieces Another particularly emotive issue is how to manage the growing collection of masterpieces being produced by your budding artist! Their pictures and drawings are like a view into their little inside worlds, a window into their thoughts and feelings. However, if your child produces just one drawing a day that is 352 pieces of art per child per year. This is excluding the crèche and Montessori masterpieces too! I recommend the following: ✹ When you receive the latest creation, invest a few minutes in exploring with your child what the picture is about, praising them on their effort and picking some points to particularly mention such as choice of colours. Who doesn’t appreciate praise!! ✹ Pin up the artwork in your own family art gallery for a week so your child can see you value their work.

✹ At the end of the week, you then have a choice to keep the work or not. If you choose to keep it, a simple solution I recommend is a glue stick and a scrapbook. The scrapbook can be as elaborate or as plain as you chose and have a separate scrapbook for each child. ✹ Date the artwork you are keeping and glue it in, maybe mentioning a few key details such as what your child said the picture was about or where they did it. It is that simple! ✹ Keep the scrapbooks within easy reach so you can regularly look through them or show them to grandparents. Too many memories and treasures lay forgotten in attics! Consciously Clearing is a fun and mindful decluttering service designed to help clients clear clutter out of their homes and re-energise their space. See the Consciously Clearing Facebook page for more.

Shop around

Experts recommend that you shop around for items like insurance, utilities, TV, phone and broadband services regularly to ensure you’re getting the best deal. Ring up your providers and don’t be afraid to ask for a new deal. This applies to your bank account too – are you paying unnecessary fees? Can you switch to a free account?

Keep your loose change

Get a big jar or vase and put your loose change in it at the end of each day. You’ll be surprised how fast this will fill up – and the amount you have when you empty it!

Pay off any debt

Sit down with your budget and make any debt a priority. Pay off credit cards each month to avoid any high interest charges. Then, put what money you were using to pay debt into a savings account you can’t touch on a daily basis.

08/02/2017 16:33

ESSENTIALS: TOYS

SENSIBLE TIPS WHEN PICKING BABY’S FIRST TOY Toy shopping for your newborn can be overwhelming, it’s difficult to know what to look for. There’s a huge push for toys to be educational these days, but how can a newborn begin their education just by playing? ELLEN FLYNN investigates...

For the first few months it’s common to think that a baby will do nothing but sleep, eat, poop, repeat and that wouldn’t be too far off the mark. But the truth is, play is a child’s work and toys are the tools they need to learn and process huge amounts of information that they receive in their first year of life. Here’s a quick guide on what to look for when buying those first few baby toys.

Mouthing off

As we all know, babies tend to experience new things with their mouths. This is because they have more nerve endings per millimetre in their mouths than in any other part of their body. The mouth is their window to the world. Through it, they discover what softness, hardness and firmness feels like by letting it explore different objects (or fingers). Toys that will help your child’s mouth get ready for complex eating are ideal, as well as anything that can soothe those pesky teething pains.

How does that feel?

Get a whiff of that!

Babies will enjoy and notice the differences in the textures surrounding them, even without the dexterity to scoop, pour and mould material. Most babies will prefer soft, warm textures, but this can change as their curiosity grows. Look for toys that present a variety of textures to the child, letting them discover the differences between them through play.

From as young as three days old babies can recognise their mother’s scent. Comfort objects such as blankets or teddys that are infused with Mom’s smell will soothe your baby and can also trigger a smile when coming across them unawares.

Look, what’s that?

Children’s eyesight can take a few months to develop, but in order to help it along, toys with strong contrasting colours (black and white, red, blue and yellow) are best for your baby. In their first 12 months, your baby’s sight will develop from seeing objects that

are ten to 13 inches in front of their face, to recognising objects and people from across a room. Get them started on their vocabulary early by pointing out the different colours and shapes of their toys.

Did I make that noise?

All children love making noise. The pots and pans you’re trying to cook can suddenly become your toddler’s brand-new drum set and the same instinct can be found in your baby. Rattles and shakers encourage self expression and babies discover that by manipulating

their toys, they can create a variety of sounds in different ways. Don’t forget to applaud and cheer your baby on when they successfully produce noise from their toy.

Growing with your child

Children are expensive, and the last thing we need is our children’s toys booting up the bill any more than they already do. So it’s imperative to look for toys that will grow with our children. Toys with add-ons or reconfigurations that can develop with your baby monthto-month are ideal investments.

TOP TOYS FOR NEW BABIES

Guess How Much I Love You Lullaby Hare, €31, www.argos.ie

ELC Blossom Farm Touch and Feel Cubes, €16.99, Mothercare

Cuddleduck, £7.99, www.cuddledry.com

MI Spring 2017_News Toys.indd 16

My First Peter Rabbit soft toy, €20, Debenhams

Lamaze Olly Oinker, €14.99, Smyths Toys

09/02/2017 15:00

17 ESSENTIALS: TOYS

YES! YOU CAN PLAY WITH A NEW BABY! New babies might sleep and eat a lot, but after the first month or two, you’ll find that they’re up for a bit of craic too. Here are some simple games to coax those adorable first smiles from your little one. Once you’ve got over the first few weeks of dealing with a newborn, it’s time to relax into parenthood and start enjoying the newest member of your family. You may find that your baby is becoming more alert by the day – and that’s a sign that you can make more of their “awake” times, lengthening these out so the naps get longer in length as the months pass by.

Get dancing! You may have noticed that your baby is soothed when you walk

around with her in your arms. Try turning the walk into a gentle waltz-style dance, complete with slow twirls and turns. Just make sure to keep your baby’s back and head well supported throughout, and avoid any jerking or shaking movements.

Rhymes and stories Go for baby books in bright primary colours, and point out the objects in the pictures. Soft cloth books are great for baby to grab and to play with by herself.

Show and tell Your baby will find all sorts of objects fascinating, from an empty plastic bottle to a kitchen utensil. Introduce your baby to different objects and let her touch and feel them. Just make sure the object is non-harmful for your baby.

Tickle time Your baby loves your touch, and gently tickling her tummy will get

a great reaction, especially as she gets older. Kisses and tickles are the quickest route to those beautiful first smiles.

Kiddie games Games like Itsy Bitsy Spider and This Little Piggy appeal to baby’s sense of hearing and touch. If you need reminding of the words and actions, do a search on the internet.

Scientific research proves ClevaMama® ClevaFoam® reduces Positional Plagiocephaly a disorder that affects a baby’s head seats, for instance, and this is a time when the baby’s skull is softest and most easily moulded into a different shape and causing Positional Plagiocephaly. Doctors still recommend that babies sleep on their backs as the benefit of reducing SIDS far outweighs any dangers due to Positional Plagiocephaly.

ClevaMama® caring for your baby from pregnancy right up to toddler. New research from world renowned University at Trinity College Dublin Ireland, has found that using a ClevaMama® ClevaFoam® product can significantly reduce Positional Plagiocephaly in infants. Plagiocephaly, also known as Deformational Plagiocephaly or Flat Head Syndrome is reported to affect up to 50% of babies under the age of one, in particular premature babies. of babies are effected by Flat Head Syndrome

The primary reason for Positional Plagiocephaly is due to pressure from the outside part of the skull that’s caused by the baby’s sleeping or resting position. Since the ‘back to sleep’ campaign was introduced in the early 90’s, doctors have recommended that all babies sleep on their backs to reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS or ‘cot death’). As a result babies now spend much of their early lives lying on their backs, while sleeping, while being carried about or while in car

During the two year research scientists found that ClevaFoam® helped reduce the pressure on an infant’s skull which aggravates Flat Head Syndrome by up to 50% and increased support by 80%. The study also found both lower stress distribution on a baby’s head and lower strain energy density when using ClevaFoam® products ensuring natural growth and development, becoming the only product scientifically proven to reduce the pressure on the back of your baby’s head helping to prevent Flat Head Syndrome. Made using open cell low resilience polyurethane foam ClevaFoam® is lightweight and more breathable with reduced heat retention when compared to other mattresses. Using Airflow™ technology coverings on all products also helps increase airflow and draws away moisture from your baby. ClevaFoam® can be used from birth, with the upper age limit depending on the product. Products from our range include a 10 in 1 Nursing Pillow, Cot/Cot Bed Mattresses, Moses Basket/ Pram Mattresses, Toddler Pillow, Head Support as well as our ClevaSleep+ Positioner. Products are widely available from: Smyths, Mothercare & Independent Retailers.

For more information visit clevamama.com and check our page at facebook.com/ClevaMama

MI Spring 2017_News Toys.indd 17

09/02/2017 15:00

18 ESSENTIALS: BOOKS

TELLING TALES

Reviewed by maternity & infant editor Penny (mum), Danny (6) & Ellie (4)

PICK OF THE PILE

+ years

Classic Nursery Rhymes

Illustrated by Dorothy M Wheeler; foreword by Chris Riddell (Bloomsbury) Illustrated by Dorothy M Wheeler; foreword by Chris Riddell (Bloomsbury) I’ll admit to being a bit of a sap when it comes to beautiful, timeless children’s books. Beatrix Potter, Winnie The Pooh and Flower Fairies are among the books undoubtedly I care about more than the kids. I’ll admit that this gorgeous version of classic nursery rhymes appealed more to me at first – but Ellie loves the whimsical rhymes and the original artwork from 1916. So much so that I’m thinking of finding some of the prints for her wall now... We like… The stunning illustrations They’ll love… The classic rhymes and songs that appeal to all ages.

NEW FAVOURITES

3By+ the yearsLight

+ 3Happy yearsHooves – Yuk!

+ 3Molly yearsMaybe and

+ 2Watch yearsOut For

By Tom Percival (Bloomsbury) Stories really come into their own when they’re used to help guide a child through a big change, such as a new sibling or moving house – the latter is the subject of this gorgeous magical book. Ivan finds his new house strange and he can’t sleep. While lying awake he is visited by a creature called a Moji who takes him on a fabulous night-time adventure – and along the way, he shows him that soon the new house will feel like home. We like… The clever message. They’ll love… The exciting adventures of Moji.

By Anna Bogie and Rebecca Elliott (Fat Fox Books) The third in a series about a set of animal friends and their adventures, Happy Hooves – Yuk! Is a tale of friendship, kindness and disgusting food! Pig wants to treat his friends to a lovely treat, but his cooking doesn’t go down well. Can he save the day with one last treat? The best aspect of this book was the colourful illustrations, which had both kids memorised. There’s no white space, so the kids wanted to linger on every page to take in every aspect of the drawings. We like… The lovely tale of friendship. They’ll love… The colourful pictures!

By Kristina Stephenson (Simon and Schuster) From the creator of Sir Charlie Stinky Socks comes Molly Maybe’s latest adventure – this time when she discovers three little monsters making a stink because they’ve lost their kite and are too scared of the Ghoulie Gumpus to get it back. Can Molly show them they’ve nothing to be scared of? Or are they right to be scared? I liked the feisty personality of Molly Maybe – a worthy heroine for any little girl! We like… The strong female character. They’ll love… The stinky monsters!

By Ben Faulks; illustrated by Ben Cort (Bloomsbury) What do you get when you bring together Cbeebies award-winning presenter Mr Bloom and the illustrator of Aliens Love Underpants? A pretty good book! This is a lovely simple story of a little boy who loves to jump in puddles – but some puddles can be more surprising than others! The illustrations are stunning and really set off the simple text that appeals to all kids from the very small upwards – and inspire imagination for your next muddy walk! We like… The easy story. They’ll love… The fun of the hero jumping in the puddles!

of the Moon

MI Spring 2017_News Books.indd 18

the Ghost Train

Muddy Puddles!

08/02/2017 16:32

19 PRESCRIBING ADVICE

Sometimes advice is easier said than done, writes our resident GP columnist DR SINEAD BEIRNE – but when it comes to your pelvic floor exercises, the advice really should be heeded...

Importance of pelvic floor

ometimes giving advice is a hell of a lot easier than heeding it. I’m forever advising my patients to take more exercise, stop smoking and lose weight. I tell my pregnant patients and postnatal mums that it’s so important for them to do their pelvic floor muscles exercises to ward off problems in the future. This is when I must confess that even though my first child is nine months old, I’ve done little in the way of pelvic floor exercises. It flies in the face of my usual behaviour: I love a challenge even if it’s doing something that I find unpleasant. I know the rules. If you’ve gone through childbirth you need to put the work in now in order to strengthen the pelvic floor or else you risk problems with incontinence and prolapse in the future. The pelvic floor muscles lie across the base of your pelvis to help keep the pelvic organs – bladder, uterus and bowel – in the correct position. If the muscles are working well they should react automatically to help control your bladder and bowel. They also provide support to the vaginal wall. If you have a problem with your pelvic floor, you may find that you leak urine when you cough, sneeze or exercise. You may also get a sudden urge to go to the toilet but can’t always get there on time. You might find that you have a prolapse, which can feel like something coming down in the vagina. I often diagnose women in their 60s with vaginal prolapse. The vast majority of these women will have gone through childbirth. Less often I’ve seen similar problems in women in their late 30s and early 40s who’ve had big babies. One of the most common reasons for the pelvic floor muscles to become weakened is childbirth. The

risk is increased again if you have had an assisted vaginal birth, an episiotomy or significant tear or a very large baby. There are a few other causes for a weakness to occur in the pelvic floor including chronic constipation, heavy or repeated lifting, high impact exercise, being overweight, smoking and the menopause. Pelvic floor exercises involve tightening (squeezing) the muscles around the back passage, as if you’re trying to stop yourself passing wind. While you hold this squeeze, try to tighten around the vagina and urethra (the place where urine comes out), as if you’re trying to stop yourself from passing urine. Hold for a count of five, then relax. You’ve now completed slow pull-ups or long squeezes. Then try to do the same exercise quickly and immediately let go again. These are called fast pull-ups or short squeezes. The aim is to do a long squeeze followed by ten short squeezes, and repeat this cycle about ten times. The whole cycle takes about five minutes. The advice from the experts is to aim to do this sequence at least three times a day. Sounds easy, right? Yet I can’t help but think that if my stunt double could do the exercises while I reaped the benefits…that would suit me just fine. If you struggle like me and have a mental block when it comes to pelvic floor exercises there’s a great little app that you can buy for £3.99 from the NHS called Squeezy, which is designed to help you remember to do them. I may have missed my first two five-minute pelvic floor exercise sessions today because the alarm on my Squeezy app wasn’t set up properly (shameless cop out, I know!) but tomorrow’s a new day and it’s never too late to make a fresh start.

Dr. Sinead Beirne is a GP in Irishtown in Dublin and the resident doctor on TV3’s Ireland AM and Newstalk Breakfast. She is a presenter of TV3 series Doctor In The House. Follow her on Twitter: @DrSineadBeirne All content in this column is for general information only and should not be treated as a substitute for the advice of your own doctor. Always consult your own GP if you are concerned about health matters.

MI Spring 2017_GP Column.indd 19

08/02/2017 16:14

20 THE BURNING ISSUE

didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t experience any problems applying for maternity leave

OUR SURVEY We surveyed 100 maternity & infant readers to get their opinions on Irelandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s maternity benefits scheme.

Did your workplace top up the statutory maternity payment, either partly or fully?

MI Spring 2017_Maternity Leave.indd 20

% YES

Do you think six months is enough time for maternity leave?

% YES

Were you offered the option of extending your maternity leave past six months?

% YES

08/02/2017 16:17

21 THE BURNING ISSUE

DOES IRELAND’S

MATERNITY BENEFITS SYSTEM NEED TO BE OVERHAULED?

Do we get enough from the government in terms of leave and pay when we have babies? Does the new paternity benefit go far enough? And what about extra leave for parents of premature babies? PENNY GRAY takes a look at the burning issue that is maternity leave in Ireland today...

Would you like the option of splitting your maternity leave with your partner?

MI Spring 2017_Maternity Leave.indd 21

% NO

will be the first to admit it – I paid little heed to maternity benefits before I was pregnant with my first child. In retrospect I wish I was as sensible as a friend of mine, a public health nurse, who told me her mum had encouraged her to go for a job with defined maternity pay and leave options if she was planning on having a family. Instead, I was faced with the dilemma that faces the majority of people in the private sector – 26 weeks on statutory maternity pay of 230 a week, plus the option (if my employer agreed to it) of a further three or six months unpaid leave. For a young couple with a mortgage and careers still in their infancy, losing full pay for six months was a blow. To make matters worse, my pregnancy became high-risk and I had to stop working at 30 weeks, so I had eight weeks on a minimum amount of sick pay before the maternity benefit kicked in. When it comes to maternity pay, us Irish are firmly in the middle when compared to other countries. New mums are entitled to 26 weeks of maternity leave together with 16 weeks additional unpaid maternity leave. Under the Maternity Protection (Amendment) Act 2004 at least two weeks have to be taken before the end of the week of your baby’s expected birth and at least four weeks after. You can decide how you would like to take the remaining weeks. Generally, employees take two weeks before the birth and the remaining weeks after. If you have enough PRSI contributions, you can receive benefit of 230 a week for the first 26 weeks. Some employers “top up” their employees’ benefit so they don’t lose out on salary when on leave – this is purely up to the em-

ployer, and in the private sector, it is becoming more rare by the day. You are also entitled to take up to a further 16 weeks’ additional maternity leave, which begins immediately after the end of maternity leave. This period is not covered by Maternity Benefit, nor is your employer obliged, unless otherwise agreed, to make any payment during this period. Over the course of your maternity leave (including the additional 16 weeks, you are entitled to any holidays accumulated or public holidays that occurred during your time away from work. When compared to other countries, Ireland tends to fare okay when it comes to maternity leave and benefits. We are a long way from Sweden, which offers a whopping 480 days of paid maternity leave, together with a whole host of benefits and aids for parents of young children. Yet we are far ahead of many other countries, including the US, which offers a measly 12 weeks’ mandatory maternity leave.

Paternity pay Last year, Minister for Social Protection Leo Varadkar introduced Paternity Leave for the first time, which entitles new parents (apart from the mother of the child) to two weeks’ statutory leave (at a rate of 230 per week) following the birth or adoption of a child on or after 1st September 2016. However, figures for the first three months of the scheme (to the end of November 2016) shows that 3,581 claims had been approved – which is low enough considering that more than 16,000 babies are born every quarter in Ireland, even allowing for those who don’t have sufficient

08/02/2017 16:18

22 THE BURNING ISSUE

READER COMMENTS “Maternity leave needs to be longer. A six month old is too young, and still developing physically & emotionally, and with huge mile stones coming, one on one time with a parent is essential. Also the current rate of maternity is unacceptable. For a woman to be in a part-time/full-time job, paying tax, PRSI & USC they should b entitled to more. It is not the employer’s job to ‘top up’. “ “Longer maternity leave option; if you have twins/triplets maternity leave should be extended; both parents should be able to avail of maternity leave; statutory maternity leave sum to be increased, v difficult to survive on current amount if not topped up by employer.“ “Benefit paid should be based on PRSI contributions for those who get nothing from employers. There should also be a mandatory minimum contribution from employers. “ “I’d extend maternity leave for parents of premature babies. They should get paid from the date of birth until six months from the baby’s actual due date. Too many mothers have to either go back to work too early or have to take unpaid leave or leave their jobs when they have a problem. “ “Given not all employers do a wage top up the benefit should not be taxed. Maternity is based on PRSI contributions so those mothers who work and contribute to society by paying their taxes should not be financially penalised for starting a family. “ “Unpaid leave should be extended to 26 weeks. It’s time to start solids at six months so it’s a silly cut-off time. Also makes it difficult to extend breastfeeding.“ “I would make it a year at least with the option to take two years if you want. A year’s maternity pay with the option of spreading your payments over the two years if you want.” “Fathers have just as much right to stay at home if they want to and some women would like to go back to work and let the men run the household.“

MI Spring 2017_Maternity Leave.indd 22

PRSI contributions to qualify for the payment. But Minister Varadkar says he is pleased with the figures, and points out that fathers can take the leave any time in the first 26 weeks after their child’s birth, so even those born on 1st September would have until the end of February to take it. The figures have led to many equality campaigners concerned that the leave does not go far enough to encourage or allow fathers to take paternity leave. And while few people would argue against the introduction of paternity leave, many would like to see the system ramp up to a more equal position in years to come. In Sweden, which is often cited as the most progressive country in terms of family rights and aids, each parent is entitled to 240 of the 480 days of paid parental leave. In addition, each parent has two months specifically reserved for him or her. These two months are NOT transferable. As a result, men in Sweden take nearly a quarter of parental leave, and the government is looking to improve on this figure still – even offering an extra daily payment if 270 days of the paid parental leave is divided equally between the two parents. Looking at this, it appears we have some way to go when it comes to paternity leave.

Premature births There is one very obvious issue with Ireland’s maternity/parental leave rights – and that’s for parents of premature babies. Maternity leave can be taken as early as 16 weeks before the due date of the baby; to do so, simply get a letter from your GP and send it to the Maternity Benefit section of the Department of Social Protection, confirming the date the baby was born and that the baby was born prematurely. The problem here is that the leave cannot be extended – which means the mum of a baby born three months early could be heading back to work only a few months or even weeks after her baby was discharged from the neo-natal unit. Mandy Daly, one of the founders of Irish Neonatal Health Alliance (INHA), which supports and educates families coping with preterm birth, while working together with various health professionals and organisations to promote positive preterm healthcare, explains that the law at present can present huge problems for parents dealing with the complications of having a premature baby. As a result, the INHA has launched a petition to lengthen maternity leave for parents of preterm babies, which they plan to present to Leo Varadkar early this year. “We had a lot of people coming to us talking about maternity leave issues,” Mandy explains. “They might be saying things like ‘my baby is still in hospital and my leave it nearly up’, or they’ve had to take unpaid leave. The definition of maternity leave

is time to care for your new baby – but that’s not possible when you have a preterm baby. For instance, my own daughter, who was preterm, was so sick that I couldn’t touch her for four weeks. Even when we were discharged after three months in hospital with a medically fragile baby, I wasn’t able to be mum – I was an extension of a group of carers for her – but my paid leave was just about up. There is also a high instance of post-traumatic stress disorder and depression among mothers of preterm babies – having to go back to work is just compounding an already fragile situation. Finally there’s the practical matter of how much care a preterm baby needs, even the sheer number of appointments, never mind that they might be unable to go into a creche.” The petiton is not just for preterm babies too. “We’re looking at extending maternity leave for any mother whose baby has to be cared for in hospital after birth,” says Mandy. “Ideally we would want maternity leave not to start until they’re discharged, but it can be complicated, for instance, some babies might be transferred to Temple Street or somewhere else. The situation differs from country to country – in Sweden, leave starts when the baby is discharged, while in others, there might be an extra 10 or 13 weeks given. So we’re not sure how it would work, but we’re looking for some sort of extra provision given to mums of preterm babies – obviously we’re looking for the best provision possible.”

FURTHER READING The INHA petition is available at www.change.org. Search under Irish Neonatal Health Alliance. For information on the INHO and resources for the parents of preterm babies, log on to www.inha.ie. For information on maternity leave, see www.citizensinformation.ie.

08/02/2017 16:18

23 MUMMY MY WAY

NIAMH DOYLE set up her blog after suffering a silent miscarriage in September 2015. Unexpectedly she became pregnant again and her beautiful boy was born in July 2016. Here she talks about the strange experience of being pregnant again after a miscarriage.

midst the struggle following my miscarriage, I found out that I was pregnant again and really had no idea what to feel. Pregnancy after miscarriage, life after death, was a whole new learning. I want to say I was happy, I felt lucky, I had hope but I didn’t. I wasn’t sad, of course it was good news – but only if the baby survived, which there was no way of knowing would be the case. I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to suffer another loss, I really didn’t want to have to be. On our first pregnancy I set up the scene of telling my husband, it was beautiful. I will never forget the look on his face. On this pregnancy I told him when we were changing the sheets on the bed. I whispered it and then we went to meet friends for the night. For the next few weeks we discussed very little about it, my choice more than his. He was happy but he knew….a positive pregnancy result can mean nothing at all. I felt a lot sicker with this pregnancy, I was exhausted all the time. From 2pm until I gave up and went to bed I was sick. My appetite was insatiable, my boobs were sore and heavy. All signs of a good pregnancy and as the days and weeks continued a little bubble of hope was growing. At 8.5 weeks we had a reassurance scan, the name itself comforted me. I couldn’t look at the monitor for fear of what I wouldn’t see but there it was, a beautiful blob with a spinning top in the middle that our midwife said was our baby’s heart. It spun around hypnotising us as it did. We had never seen our first baby’s heart beating so here was the first indication for me that things were different. We left the appointment and I saw that face again. The joy of pregnancy, of a future, of our dreams realised. It was there on my husband. He kissed me under the Christmas lights – he held me tight, brought me into him and kissed me hard. It was a kiss to breathe the life back into me, to show me that together we had been through the worst and here was the best. The scan gave me the hope I needed to accept the sickness and know that this time it may not end with pain. We told family and friends over Christmas but I was still apprehensive. I didn’t want to be imprisoned by the fear that my miscarriage had left me with and sharing the news seemed like a step towards breaking free from it. I told people with my eyes slightly squinted though, as if I was telling bad news. I still couldn’t believe that I wasn’t. I planned for how we would follow up when the pregnancy ended again, I had conversations to this effect in my head so that I could be more prepared this time. On January 7th we had a 12 week scan as part of our booking appointment. There on the screen appeared our baby. It was a tiny miraculous human dancing for its Mom and Dad. Its little legs kicked up to meet its waving arms. It moved so much the sonographer got different measurements each time. A happy baby was what we were told from a laughing consultant, our happy baby. We left the appointment and for the first time in my pregnancy I rubbed my belly. I spoke to my child that had danced for me. I thanked it for showing us just how alive it is. I thanked our first baby for preparing my body to welcome its sibling, for showing me through its own death that without any doubts I desperately wanted, and was ready, to be a mom. Maybe this time I will get a rainbow from the storm.

“I THANKED OUR FIRST BABY FOR SHOWING ME THROUGH ITS OWN DEATH THAT WITHOUT ANY DOUBTS I DESPERATELY WANTED TO BE A MOM”

See more at www.wehoneybear.blogspot.ie

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08/02/2017 16:18

24 DAD’S DIARY

FAIRIES AND

FAIRYTALES A simple fairy door has brought no end of imaginative adventures into NICK WILKINSON’s house...

ike many families keen to make use of extra space, we have welcomed a lodger into our home. It’s handy because she has her own entrance, so comes and goes as she pleases. On the downside, she’s not paying any rent and eats her bodyweight in sugar every day. So, it’s lucky she’s a fairy and doesn’t weigh very much. Like so many kids across the country, my daughter has a fairy door. One of our neighbours very kindly gave it to her last year. For a few months now, Poppy has been in regular correspondence with a young fairy called Greenheart. They exchange letters about about the issues of the day – news, current affairs or family events. Let me be clear. I do not read my daughter’s letters. Although her reading is very good, she needs help with Greenheart’s letters. Fairy writing is difficult to read. For starters, fairies write very small and the handwriting is quite intricate. Then there is the style of the language itself. I don’t like to criticise people whose English is not their first language, but Greenheart, like most fairies, has quite a florid prose style. But it’s the content of her letters that I find most interesting. Greenheart’s first letters were very apologetic. When Poppy was given the door, her friend explained that she should leave a little bowl of sugar beside it. The fairies would come through the door and gobble it up. The bowl should then be replenished to encourage them to keep coming. Several weeks went by before Poppy came down to the kitchen one morning, very forlorn. It appeared that no fairies had come to partake of the sweet offering she had so kindly left out. I gave my wife a look. It was the first we’d heard about it. “Did you cast a spell over the sugar, when you left it?” I asked. My little girl shook her head. The sugar was duly blessed with a spell and left at the door. Sure enough, the next morning, all of the sugar was gone. My daughter was thrilled. But after a few days of sugar-scoffing fairies clearing out our larder, she came down once again, very disheartened. “None of the fairies have replied to my letter.”

I looked at my wife. They write letters? We did not know that. “Which fairy did you write the letter to?” we asked. “All of them.” “Well there’s the problem right there. You need to address the letter to one fairy.” My daughter ran away to compose a letter to Greenheart. The next morning, there came a prompt reply, apologising for all the confusion and promising regular correspondence in future. My daughter was over the moon. She’s in touch with Greenheart every day now. Her fairy appears to be delighted with her new pen pal. However, she now has quite a responsibility to keep up the stream of letters. And she must be a very busy fairy because she doesn’t always reply immediately, which can leave our daughter a bit put out. She has asked that Greenheart make sure she checks for new letters and responds promptly. For Greenheart, it must be a bit like getting stern notices from the TV license inspector. But Greenheart takes it all in good humour. Even after a hard day in the forest, collecting nectar for her pet bee, or casting spells on sleeping woodcutters, she makes sure she pops her head through our daughter’s fairy door to check whether there is a letter waiting. If, God forbid, Greenheart is so tired that she forgets to check, she always writes a very apologetic note explaining her tardiness. And recently she has taken to managing my daughter’s expectations a little better. Apparently, this weekend, she has to venture into the bramble forest – to look for the golden thread from an ice spider’s nest. It’s the only material that can help mend a fairy’s wing. (One of her friends had a nasty encounter with a thorn bush recently.) Greenheart hopes that Poppy understands, but she won’t be able to send any letters until Monday. Then she’ll visit for a feast from the sugar bowl and to deliver a letter telling Poppy all about her epic adventure. If her last encounter with the ice spider is anything to go by, I can’t wait to read it.

“She must be a very busy fairy because she doesn’t always reply immediately, which can leave our daughter a bit put out.”

MI Spring 2017_Dads Diary.indd 24

08/02/2017 16:06

25 TREND

MATERNITY

Half-sleeve jersey tube dress in dazzling blue, €21.99, Mothercare

Style Preparing for a baby can be a scary time in many ways – including for your bank account! Few of us have the funds to splash out on a whole maternity wardrobe, especially when there are more pressing concerns like buggies and cots to buy. But unless you’re going to lock yourself away or live in sweats (neither of which we’d recommend) it’s worth investing in some classic maternity pieces to see you through the nine months and beyond. With this in mind, we’ve concentrated on some classic looks for this issue’s maternity fashion pages. In Trimester Trends, we look at dressing up – or down – a simple pair of black trousers, a staple in any maternity wardrobe. On our Maternity Trend page, we take a fresh look at stripes, mixing it up with some splashes of red and navy. Finally, model and actress Molly Sims gives us a masterclass in giving a simple black stretch dress an edge with some animal print boots on p28.

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09/02/2017 15:01

26 TREND

Trimester Trends

A pair of maternity black trousers is well worth the investment when you’re expecting. This season, anything goes – cropped, tailored, jeans-style or loose, just choose your favourite!

JEANS GENIUS

BUMP ENVY

COOL CROP

61 2

2 2 3 3

5 5

6 6

1 Sunglasses, €4, Penneys 2 Anaise maternity print top, €85, Isabella Oliver 3 Suedette hobo bag, €32, Accessorize 4 Black skinny over-the-bum jeans, €65, Seraphine 5 Light-Up lip gloss in Misty Mauve, €25.07, Artistry 6 Wedges, €55, J by Jasper Conran @ Debenhams

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1 Velvet & metal choker, €20, V By Very @ Littlewoods Ireland 2 Red short-sleeved wrap top, €36, JoJo Maman Bebe 3 Under-thebump formal trousers, €39.99, Mothercare 4 PS Pro Colour lipstick, €3, Penneys 5 Emily colour-block mini bag, €19.90, Accesorize 6 Como leopard-print shoes, €99, Dune

1 Phoenix Geo stud earrings, €6.90, Accessorize 2 Green tunic, €49.99, Mamalicious 3 Anklelength over-the-bump trousers, €17.99, New Look 4 Sì Huile de Parfum, €90, Giorgio Armani @ Brown Thomas 5 Crossbody bag, €34, V By Very @ Littlewoods Ireland 6 Back and white backless loafers, €45, Miss Selfridge

09/02/2017 15:03

27 TREND

N au t i cal Nice

Nautical stripes are always a popular choice for maternity wear. Go for the classic Breton stripe or shake up the look with red and navy.

12 5

Main: Dress, €34.99, and jacket, €69.99, both Mamalicious 1 Fashionably Silver Rose Gold chain bracelet, €165 Folli Follie 2 Red blazer, €70, Topshop 3 Masai necklace in navy, €35, Arnotts 4 Nia tie dress, €119, Isabella Oliver 5 Swimsuit, €44.99, Mamalicious 6 Mono stripe cross-body bag, €34, V by Very @ Littlewoods Ireland 7 Straw hat, €12.99, H&M 8 Stripe mules, €25, Next 9 Red mini backpack, €19.99, New Look 10 Masie maternity striped long-sleeve midi dress, €14, Boohoo.com 11 Berry leaf pearl drop earrings, €118, Enibas 12 Red stripe maternity top, €11.99, New Look 13 Betty Barclay scarf in blue, €45, Arnotts

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09/02/2017 14:48

28 TREND

STEAL HER

STYLE Model and actress Molly Sims shows us effortless day to night maternity style with a simple stretchy black dress that can be given an edge with on-trend accessories. Having just given birth to her third child, actress and model Molly Sims knows a bit about maternity style. The 43-year-old star admitted to being nervous and stressed throughout her third pregnancy, but that didn’t stop her making the very most of her beautiful bump on the red carpet and when out and about. Molly proved she wasn’t scared of flashing the bling on the red carpet, but it’s her everyday style that inspired us this issue. Rather than sticking to casual jeans and a top to get her through the days, Molly opts for a comfy stretchy black dress and lifts it with some great animal-print ankle boots, shades and a big bag. Add a nonmaternity moto leather jacket (and leave it open) for extra edge and to keep you snug on chilly days. This is the perfect style to take you from day into night, and from winter into spring.

Guess sunglasses, €94, Sunglasses Shop

Burgundy leather jacket, €119, F&F @ Tesco

Eldon maternity midi dress, €71, Isabella Oliver

GETTY IMAGES

M&I

Drop earrings, €13, Marks & Spencer

Joli Rouge Brilliant in No.32 Pink Cranberry, Clarins

Pebbles leopard print ankle boots, €155, Dune @ Littlewoods Ireland Hobo bag, €110, Nine by Savannah Miller @ Debenhams

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09/02/2017 15:02

Home is the place where memories are made. There are 5,000 people homeless in Ireland. One in seven people accessing homeless services is a child. By remembering Focus Ireland in your Will, you can provide more people with a place to call home, a place to create their own happy memories. We understand that when making your Will, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll want to care for those closest to you first, but once you have, any contribution to Focus Ireland can make such a big difference. Please contact Pauline Costello in Focus Ireland, in complete confidence, on 01 881 5900. Thank you.

1850 204 205 www.focusireland.ie

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09/02/2017 25/09/2015 11:00 27/05/2015 15:13 10:43

30 TREND

Perfect First Outfits Think soft fabrics, snuggly accessories and and pastel colours when choosing your baby’s very first outfit for wearing home from hospital. BLUSH PINK

1 Pink lace-print hat, €25.30, Liu Jo @ Childrensalon, 2 Newborn hooded velour-lined cardi, €23.50, Mothercare, 3 Sheep comforter, €14, JoJo Maman Bebe, 4 Newborn pink rabbit dungaree set, €17.99, Mothercare, 5 Blush stripe blanket, €65, Seraphine

MI Spring 2017_Baby Trend.indd 30

BABY BLUE

1 Knitted top and trousers set, €65, Emile et Rose @ Brown Thomas, 2 Velour novelty hat hat, €7.99, Mothercare, 3 Sheep baby socks (2 pack), €5.99, JoJo Maman Bebe, 4 Star print swaddling blanket (2 pack), €40, Aden & Anais @ Brown Thomas, 5 Newborn interlock mittens (2 pack), €4.50, Mothercare

SOFT GREY

1 Knitted blanket, €96.60, Stella McCartney @ Childrensalon, 2 Velour wadded pramsuit, €28.99, Mothercare, 3 White & grey embroidered babygro, €73.60, Tartine et Chocolat @ Childrensalon, 4 Star embroidered baby hat, €7, JoJo Maman Bebe, 5 Jellycat bashful polar bear, €25, Brown Thomas

09/02/2017 14:47

31 BG denim jacket (0-3 years), €12, Penneys

TREND Hairband, €6.99, H&M

Long-sleeved badge t-shirt (3mths-6 years), from €8, Next Hat, €9.99, H&M

COOL BADGE PE bag, £7.99, beckyandlolo.co.uk

C ool

Pink heart tactel tights, €6.99, Mothercare

FOR PRESCHOOL

Dinosaur jeans (3mths-6 years), from €15, Next

HIPPIE DENIM

Floral dress (3mths-6 years), from €10, Next

Embroidered trainers, from €22, Next

Green tricot jacket (2-8 years), €19.99, Little Bird @ Mothercare

Double Velcro runners in navy, €15.99, Mothercare

Caleb trilby, €8.50, Monsoon

Pink zip-through hoody (3mths-5 years), €11.99, Mothercare Denim ruffle blouse (3mths-6 years), €10, Next

FLOWER POWER

Slogan long-sleeved t-shirt (3mths-6 years), from €6, Next

Dark wash jeans (2-8 years), €9.99, Mothercare

RETRO LOOK

Sunglasses, €5.99, H&M Mini Girls shoes, €17, River Island

BG floral twill trousers (0-3 years), €7, Penneys

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Runners, €34.99, H&M

09/02/2017 16:32

32 TREND

STEAL THIS

Cap, €8, Next

TRENDY TOT’S

STYLE

His mum Kate Hudson is famous for her effortless style, so it’s no surprise that BINGHAM HAWN BELLAMY has developed quite a springtime style of his own.

Jersey-lined mac, €22.99, Mothercare

Let’s Go Fishing mini backpack, €9.95, Dotcomgiftshop

GETTY IMAGES

Just because it’s raining outside doesn’t mean we have to be grey and miserable – at least that’s obviously Kate Hudson’s motto when it comes to dressing her son for the changeable spring weather. We love Bingham’s colourful jacket and sunshine yellow trousers, guaranteed to brighten up any rainy day. Add in a sturdy pair of wellies and you’ve got a perfect outfit for jumping in muddy puddles, a la Peppa Pig.

Yellow stretch twill trousers, €11, Penneys

Dino wellies, €16.99, Mothercare Sweatshirt, €17.99, H&M

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09/02/2017 15:02

Big Comfort, Tiny Prices! Compromise on price not on quality!

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08/02/2017 30/01/2017 17:21 17:30

34 FERTILITY

ALL ABOUT

OVULATION & FERTILITY A Many of us barely think about fertility until we decide to start a family – and then it can feel like a minefield! Here we answer some of your frequently asked questions about your cycle, ovulation and fertility – and when you should think about consulting the experts...

MI Spring 2017_Ovulation and Fertility.indd 34

s women, we are only too aware at times of our cycle – perhaps we’re going through stages of pain and PMT, our period is late for whatever reason, or perhaps it decides to hit just as you’re heading off on holidays. But while we know essentially what our cycle means, many of us don’t think about our particular cycle and what it means

for our fertility – until we decide to start trying for a baby. It is a good idea to get to know your cycle, however, so at the very least so you know what’s normal for you. If you’re taking the contraceptive pill, it’s a good idea to know what’s what for when you decide to stop taking the pill and try for a baby. Here we answer some of the common questions regarding your cycle and fertility.

08/02/2017 17:01

35 FERTILITY

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS...

What is my cycle?

A menstrual cycle is counted from the first day of a period to the first day of your next period. The average cycle is 28 days, but can range from 21 to 35 days in adults, and 21 to 45 days in teenagers. During the first half of your cycle, levels of the female hormone, estrogen, begin to rise, and the lining of the uterus grows and thickens so it can nourish an embryo if conception happens. At the same time, an egg matures in an ovary before it is released (ovulation). Upon release, the egg travels along the fallopian tube to the uterus. If the egg is fertilised, it attaches to the uterine wall; if not, it will break apart. Hormone levels fall and the thickened lining of the uterus is shed, resulting in your monthly period.

What is ovulation and when does it occur?

Ovulation occurs when a mature egg is released from one of your ovaries, pushed down the fallopian tube, and is made available to be fertilised . In an average 28-day cycle, ovulation usually occurs 10 to 16 days before the start of your next period. Counting from the first day of your last period, your most fertile time is likely to be between Day 12 and Day 17. However, many women ovulate early or late some months, and some might not ovulate at all some months. When the egg is released, it lives only for 12-24 hours; however, sperm can stay alive for up to five days, so there is a window of about six days each months when you can technically get pregnant if you ovulate.

MI Spring 2017_Ovulation and Fertility.indd 35

There are some physical signs of ovulation. The most obvious of these is an increase in vaginal discharge, which changes from white and creamy to clear, stretchy and slippery, a little like raw egg white. Other signs of ovulation include breast tenderness, bloating, mild abdominal pain, slightly increased body temperature and increased sex drive. Tracking your body temperature using a special highly sensitive thermometer can tell you when ovulation is about to occur. Alternatively, ovulation testing kits can be useful in predicting ovulation; they test for the luteinising hormone (LH) in your urine; in many women, the amount of LH in the body surges approximately 12-36 hours before ovulation occurs.

How will I know if I’m pregnant?

There are lots of old wives’ tales out there about timing sex for conception, but many of them are misleading and frankly untrue. Sperm does not become more “potent” if you save it up for the right time. In fact, research suggests that the longer sperm stays in the testicles, the higher the risk of DNA damage, which can result in difficulties in conceiving. The general belief is that sperm should be “fresh”. According to the experts, couples who have sex every two to three days throughout the month, daily during your fertile period (about five days before ovulation to two days afterwards), conceive more quickly than those who have sex only twice a week.

A missed period is the most obvious symptom. Before you start trying for a baby, you should track your periods and if they are regular, you should know pretty much the exact day your period is due. Remember that stress and lifestyle factors could delay your period. Knowing your cycle will also help you pinpoint when you ovulate (see above). Other early signs and symptoms of pregnancy include tender and swollen breasts, nausea and vomiting, increased urination, fatigue and sensitivity to strong smells. Just to confuse you even more, sometimes the early symptoms of pregnancy feel like your period is on its way; you may even experience cramping and spotting when the fertilised egg attaches to the lining of the uterus — about 10 to 14 days after conception, so just when your period could be due!

ing?

“Sperm does not become more “potent” if you save it up for the right time... research suggests that the longer sperm stays in the testicles, the higher the risk of DNA damage...”

If I want to get pregnant, should I only have sex when I’m ovulat-

Will I know when I’m ovulating?

Are home pregnancy tests accurate?

Gone are the days of having to go to the doctor to make sure you’re pregnant; in fact, some of the ones you can buy in the chemist can be even more sensitive than the ones in a doctor’s surgery. A home pregnancy test measures the amount of hCG, the pregnancy hormone, in your urine. Some tests are more sensitive than others, but to minimise the trauma of a false negative result, try to wait until the day your period is due to test (usually two weeks after you ovulate). If you get a negative result, wait three days and if you still don’t have your period, test again, as you may have ovulated later than thought.

I’m pregnant – so when is my due date?

Your due date is estimated from the date of the first day of your last period – another reason why it’s important to make a note of your periods. Believe us, you’ll be asked that date many, many times over the next nine months. Count 40 weeks from the date of your last period and that’s your estimated due date. You will probably be offered a “dating” scan at some stage, which will measure your baby and give you a more accurate due date. However, remember that the average pregnancy can last anything between 38 and 42 weeks, so the chances of your baby arriving on your actual due date are small enough.

08/02/2017 17:01

36 FERTILITY

FERTILITY

SOS

So you’ve tracked your period and you’re trying for a baby but nothing is happening – should you be worried? We answer some of your questions regarding fertility issues and getting help...

Does age really matter?

According to data, 52.7 per cent of first-time Irish mums were aged 3039 in 2013, making Irish women some of the oldest mothers in Europe. More and more of us are waiting to become mothers for a number of reasons: career, financial and even social. Plus, older celebrity mothers such as Janet Jackson (expecting her first child at 50) make it seem that conceiving when you’re older is easy – but unfortunately biology doesn’t back this up. The fact is that fertility starts to decline for women from about the age of 30, dropping down more steeply from the age of 35, and even more steeply again from 40. The chances of infertility and miscarriages rise sharply after the age of 35, even more so after the age of 40. If you are trying for a baby, the general advice is that if you are aged under 35 and have no diagnosed fertility issues, seek help if you have not conceived within a year. If you are over 35, or you or your partner have been diagnosed with any fertility issues, seek help if you have not conceived within six months.

I have endometriosis; could this affect my fertility?

Endometriosis refers to a condition in which the tissue that normally lines the uterus grows outside it. Cysts or scar tissue develop and cause the surrounding area to thicken. Classic symptoms include pain before and during your period, or when having sex. It affects up to 10 per cent of women, and it’s estimated that about a quarter of sufferers can have fertility issues. If you have been diagnosed with endometriosis or suspect you may have it and want to try for a baby, talk to your GP.

Can polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) or fibroids affect fertility?

This is a difficult one to answer as these conditions affect every woman differently. Both can affect fertility, but there is treatment available if you are experiencing difficulty in conceiving. PCOS occurs when a woman’s hormones are out of balance and can result in irregular periods, reduced fertility, excess hair growth and

MI Spring 2017_Ovulation and Fertility.indd 36

weight gain. Treatments include weight loss, contraceptive pill or medicines such as clomifene or metformin if you are trying to conceive. Fibroids are benign tumours that grow from muscle cells in the uterus. They’re most common in women ages 30 to 40, and symptoms can include heavy or painful periods, discomfort in the lower abdomen, constipation or more frequent urination. Generally, fibroids don’t require treatment (they tend to go after the menopause due to changing hormone levels), but if they are interfering with fertility or impacting on your life, your doctor may recommend treatment through surgery or medication. The key is to always talk to your GP and/or specialist about your condition if you are concerned.

I’ve been trying for a while, but still nothing. Where do I get help?

Your first port of call is your GP, who can run some initial tests or advise you on where to go next. If after talking to your GP, you decide to seek help from a fertility clinic, rest assured that there are some excellent clinics in Ireland, many of which are pioneers when it comes to fertility treatments. Ask your GP for recommendations, but remember to do your research yourself too. If you know of other people who have

battled fertility issues and are willing to share their knowledge, open up to them about your own needs. When you have located a clinic that could be right for you, call them and ask any questions you want – if a clinic doesn’t answer your answers satisfactorily, then maybe it’s not the right clinic for you.

What can I expect from fertility treatment?

Fertility treatment is highly individualised, so what’s right for you might not be right for everyone. Broadly speaking, fertility treatment can be grouped into three – fertility medicines that help with ovulation issues; surgical solutions, such as treating blocked fallopian tubes, which can stop pregnancy from occurring; and assisted conception, such as IUI and IVF, which can help with sperm issues or unexplained infertility. IUI is much less invasive; the sperm sample is “washed”, with the more mobile sperm inserted into the woman’s cervix. Often the woman is given a low dose of fertility drugs to enhance ovulation as well. IVF is when the egg is extracted from the woman and fertilised with sperm from the man. The embryo is then inserted into the woman. Again, these treatments are not for every couple, and there are many more out there; the key is to seek help from the experts if you think you need it.

08/02/2017 17:01

37 HEALTH

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT…

SMEAR TESTS & PREGNANCY It’s not something you generally think about when trying for a baby, but what happens if your smear test letter arrives through the letterbox while expecting or breastfeeding? We take a look at what you should do...

Why do I need a smear test? Cervical

screening, or a smear test, looks for for changes in the cells of the cervix (neck of the womb). Changes are common enough; a smear test can pick up early changes so they can be either treated or monitored. The earlier any abnomality is picked up, the easier they are to treat. Early detection and treatment of changes can prevent cervical cancer. Women aged between 25 and 60 who have ever been sexually active should have regular smear tests, continuing after the menopause. If you have never been sexually active, then your risk is smaller and you may decide to turn down the invitation for a test for the moment. If you are not currently sexually active, but have had partners of either sex in the past, then you should attend for smear tests. According to CervicalCheck, evidence to date indicates there is no additional public health benefit in screening women under the age of 25, as although minor changes are common, invasive cancer is extremely rare among this section of the population. If you’re not sure if you should have a test, contact CervicalCheck on Freephone 1800 45 45 55.

I’m trying for a baby; should I have my smear test? If you think you are not pregnant, then

you should attend your smear test as usual. According to CervicalCheck, occasionally women may have slight bleeding after having a smear test in pregnancy, but a smear test will not increase the risk of miscarriage, so don’t worry if you find out you’re pregnant after the test. If you are registered with CervicalCheck, you can check when your next smear test is due. Alternatively, on the website, www. cervicalcheck.ie, you can fill in your PPS number and date of birth to find out when your next test is due.

My last smear test was not normal. Will this affect my pregnancy? A previous

smear test that had a “not normal” result will not affect your pregnancy. If a repeat test is due, discuss with your doctor or nurse as to whether you should proceed with it or wait. A smear test can be done safely during pregnancy and is usually taken in the second trimester (weeks 13-26). If you have been recommended to attend colposcopy you should attend your appointment. Again, if you need more information, simply discuss with your medical team.

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If I’m called for my smear test and I’m pregnant, should I do it?

If you receive your regular letter calling you for your smear test and you’re pregnant, opt to delay the test until three months after you give birth. To do this, called the CervicalCheck Freephone number on 1800 45 45 55 and explain why you need to defer.

Do I need to have a smear test after having a baby or a miscarriage? Unless you are

due a test as normal, you do not need a smear test after giving birth. If you have suffered a miscarriage and due a regular test, wait three months before having one. Also, if you have had a miscarriage, you do not need a smear test unless you are due one.

For more information on smear tests and cervical screening, see www.cervicalcheck.ie

08/02/2017 15:29

38 BROUGHT TO YOU BY CELLNUTRITION

MINERALS

INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF Conception Making sure you are not deficient in the minerals and trace elements our body needs to function optimally is an important consideration if you are trying for a baby. Here’s why Quinton is an ideal supplement if you are trying for a baby, pregnant or a new mum...

aving children is the most natural thing that couples can do, yet as more and more women seek to delay having their first child until they have an established career or are more financially stable, usually into their 30s, infertility is on the rise. As a result, a recent report predicted that the global fertility services market is expected to exceed $21bn by 2020. There are simple steps that all couples should take to ensure that they give themselves the best opportunity for the woman to become pregnant and carry their baby to fullterm with as few problems as possible. The stresses and strains of work and social habits; bad diets and the long-term use of birth control pills, antibiotics and some modern medicines; the prevalence of oestrogen-mimicking chemicals, heavy metals, and toxins in our environment can all negatively impact both the male and female reproductive systems. Even with a healthy diet, the foods we eat are largely deficient in the minerals and trace elements that our cells need to function properly. Government figures have indicated that trace elements can be as little as one third of the levels they were just 40 years ago. Whether they are present in our food or not, the cells throughout our body still require them for optimal function.

Supplements from the sea Although these minerals and trace elements are virtually impossible to source through land-raised food, such as meat or vegetables,

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the fertile areas of the seas and oceans still contain all the minerals and trace elements that our cells need to be healthy. The action of phytoplankton and zooplankton makes these elements bioavailable to us so our cells, including those involved in reproduction, can use them. This mineral-rich and bioavailable sea water is harvested and cold micro-filtered to pharmaceutical grade for you as Quinton marine plasma. Your local pharmacy or health store has entire shelves dedicated to fertility and pregnancy health. Yet the effectiveness of these supplements and indeed all nutrients are greatly reduced if you don’t have the correct balance of minerals and trace elements in your body. Research has demonstrated how all the minerals and trace elements are interdependent and reliant on each other. It is impossible to supplement with just one or a few without impacting others in the body too. In practice, this means that in order for the body to be able to create what it needs for the cells, minerals and trace elements should all be presented together in the right proportions and fully bioavailable, in other words accessible to the cell. The importance of getting the right balance of minerals and trace elements in your body and cells was proven during the early 20th century when pioneering doctors in France found that by giving couples Quinton marine plasma, women who had previously struggled with conception and pregnancy were able to conceive naturally and carry the baby to term

with a reduced risk labour. This success was repeated so many times that many babies of a certain age were termed “Quinton babies”.

New research Fast forward to the 21st century; now pioneering American naturopath, Dr. Roy Dittman, author of Brighton Baby, advocates the use of Quinton as a central element to helping couples conceive. Ideally, if both partners take Quinton on a daily basis for at least three months prior to conception, the health of developing eggs and sperm can improve and increase the chances of a successful and healthy conception. Both the male and female reproductive organs rely on having healthy cells. Women are born with all their eggs present, but they must mature correctly for healthy fertilisation. Sperm are generated and mature within the testes so the health at the time of production and maturation is essential. For the eggs and sperm to be healthy their cells must be able to replicate and divide accurately and produce the correct hormones in the right ratios. Additionally, for sperm

08/02/2017 17:41

39 BROUGHT TO YOU BY CELLNUTRITION

ABOUT QUINTON

WHAT IS QUINTON? Quinton is mineral-rich seawater harvested under strict conditions from a plankton bloom, which naturally occurs in a pristine, internationally protected part of the Bay of Biscay in the Atlantic Ocean. This life-supporting seawater contains 78 minerals and trace elements minerals all present in the perfect proportions that the human body needs to be healthy.

WHY SHOULD I TAKE IT?

“A whole new branch of medicine...has found that having healthy cells that are nourished with the minerals they require will enable your developing baby’s cells to reach their full genetic expression...” the structures responsible for movement must function correctly if the sperm are to swim without circling and then be able to penetrate and react with the egg when it is encountered. A whole new branch of medicine called Nutrigenomics that studies the effect of nutrition on genetic expression has found that having healthy cells that are nourished with the minerals they require will enable your developing baby’s cells to reach their full genetic expression too. This modern research has shown that nutritional deficiencies during pregnancy can increase

your unborn child’s risk of diabetes, obesity and heart disease later in life. Optimum nutrition improves a baby’s health into adulthood too. Other research has also suggested that it is the health of the grandmother during pregnancy that is a main factor in the health of her grandchild, which puts a responsibility on women that stretches across generations. It is imperative that couples maximise their health before conception and during pregnancy to optimise the health of our future generations, and Quinton plays a key role in this.

FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT WWW.CELLNUTRITION.COM

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Quinton Isotonic is a mineral supplement that supports fertility and the chances of a successful conception. For pregnant women, it ensures your baby receives all the minerals and trace elements they need while in the womb. This product is also 100 per cent natural and 100 per cent safe. Quinton Isotonic also gives your body the resources it needs to maintain optimum health after childbirth.

WHAT ELSE CAN QUINTON DO? Taking Quinton every day helps counter frenetic modern lifestyles where poor nutrition combined with stress can frequently lead to a shortage of minerals in our bodies and stressrelated diseases. Quinton Isotonic is perfectly safe for every age. There is a second product, Quinton Hypertonic, which provides your body with a more rapid re-mineralisation that is ideal before, during and after any type of physical exercise, and mental or emotional stress, and to boost your immune system.

HOW DO I TAKE IT? Quinton products should be taken on an empty stomach at least 10 minutes before eating. Swirl the Quinton round your mouth for at least 30 seconds to help with dental issues and because there is good absorption of nutrients through the gums and mouth. Then swallow.

08/02/2017 17:41

40 PLANNING FOR BABY

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41 PLANNING FOR BABY

BABY’S

FIRST ROOM

Technically, you don’t need a fully decked out nursery for a new baby – but if you have the space and the time, creating your baby’s first room is hugely exciting. Follow our tips to make sure your nursery is safe, well designed and doesn’t break the bank!

et’s get one thing straight here – you do not need a huge nursery with handpainted murals and the best of furniture for a new baby. All a newborn baby needs is a safe place to sleep, a method of feeding, practical care like nappy changing and bathing, and – most importantly – your love and attention. It’s also recommended that baby sleeps in with you for the first six months for safety reasons but also for practical reasons – believe us, you don’t want to move too far from your bed for those night feeds. All of that said, if you have the space and the time, planning your baby’s first room is hugely exciting, whether you’re doing it when pregnant or just before baby is ready to move out from your own room. Choosing a colour scheme, cute pictures or wall stickers, curtains and lights with your little one in mind is great fun, but it can be daunting when you see the amount of choice out there – and the huge cost of some of it. But don’t be put off – keep things simple by following our tips.

Look at your space Your first consideration is your space and where it is in relation to the rest of your house. For instance, is the nursery just for nights or will your baby nap and be changed there too? If the nursery is easily accessible then it might be worth setting up a changing station for dressing and nappy changing, and a seat for feeding. If it isn’t, you may be better off with a portable changing station, such as a box for your supplies and a simple changing mat.

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Think needs not wants This is especially important for people on budgets. Yes, sets of nursery furniture are lovely and great if you can afford it, but realistically, you don’t need a changing table and a rocking chair for feeding. They are great additions if they are important to you, but for others, a simple set of drawers or a table (or even the floor on a mat) is fine for changing, while an ordinary chair is all that’s needed for feeding.

Look to the future Babies grow very quickly into opinionated toddlers, so what might have been really cute for babies mightn’t be appropriate for growing children. Keep the decor neutral and instead add colour and personality through easily replaced accessories like wall stickers, pictures, lampshades and curtains.

Think about storage and upkeep While a small baby mightn’t need that much in the way of clothes storage, a growing toddler will need so much more. Think ahead by planning in storage such as wardrobes and drawers; this will enable you to tidy away clutter to keep your nursery looking neat and tidy. Upkeep is an important consideration too. Wooden floors are the most practical ground finishes for small children as they are easy to clean if accidents happen – and you can be sure that they are clean and hygienic. A washable rug can add softness to the floor. Use a nontoxic washable paint on the walls to deal with any messes – or marker at a later time!!

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42 PLANNING FOR BABY

NURSERY ON A BUDGET Want a nursery but on a budget? No problem! GO SECONDHAND If you have a big room and want to fill it on a budget, then check out your local DoneDeal or Adverts for secondhand furniture. Have a look at Freecycle too if your budget is tiny, or ask around friends whose kids are a little older. DON’T SKIMP ON IMPORTANT STUFF Remember that the most vital purchase is a new mattress for your baby to minimise the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, or SIDS. Don’t ever be tempted to save money by borrowing an old mattress or buying secondhand – the risk is not worth the money saved. THINK AHEAD If your budget is limited, spend your money on items that will last; for instance, a new baby can happily sleep in a full-sized cot, rather than investing in a Moses basket or crib as well as a cot or cotbed. DON’T BE A SLAVE TO BABY LABELS At the end of the day, a chair is a chair and a wardrobe is a wardrobe – look at baby brands and other furniture brands for what you need and go for the pieces that are the best quality at your price range. WAIT UNTIL LATER Who says you have to have a fully functional nursery by the time you return from the maternity hospital? Realistically, you probably won’t use the room until your baby is six months old, and it will be many months after that when your baby will be in a bed and able to roam the room by himself. Make sure you have the basics before you have the baby and slowly add other items like a monitor, storage furniture and safety gadgets as your baby gets older.

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Shop around for a monitor

Prioritise sleeping area

It can be hard for the parents when a baby moves into his own room. To give peace of mind (and hopefully a peaceful night’s sleep!), consider investing in a baby monitor so you know immediately when your baby needs your attention. Monitors range from the traditional audio-only models, which generally can be picked up for as little as 25-30, right up to ones with video monitors and sensor mats. Think carefully about what you need from a monitor – do you want a sensor mat that might tell you if your child stops breathing? Or do you want to be able to look at your baby on a screen? There are also a lot of other “add-ons”, for instance, light shows to help your baby fall asleep, a temperature monitor or two-way microphone so you can soothe your baby without having to go into him. Consider, too, important aspects like range and battery life. Opt for a reliable brand like BT or Motorola and you won’t go far wrong.

The most important piece of furniture in the room is the baby’s bed. Moses’ baskets and cribs are great for the first six months, but for a nursery, go for a full-sized cot or cotbed that will last. There is a massive safety aspect to your choice too. Laura Ward from Mothercare says that safety should be the key aspect when choosing a cot. “Little limbs can easily get caught in gaps at the sides and ends of cots. That’s why we always recommend that any gap should be no more than 3cm.” Check out the corner posts too - they shouldn’t have any decorative knobs or other elements, which could snag your baby’s clothing and lead to strangulation or other serious injuries. Check (and regularly recheck) the screws, bolts, and mattress supports to make sure they’re not loose or broken. Laura also reminds parents not to place cots near hot radiators, sunny window, shelves, ledges or appliances. “And never place it beneath a wall-hanging frame (especially one with glass or a mirror).”

Safety Tips! The most important consideration when planning a nursery is making sure your baby’s surroundings are safe. While you might be most concerned about the cot and bedding when your baby is tiny, pretty soon you’ll have a whole host of other safety concerns such as blind cords and potentially dangerous free-standing furniture. If you are putting time and effort into planing your nursery now, it’s a good idea to keep these considerations in mind from the off.

Safe sleeping

Layer bedding

“Never let your new baby sleep on an old mattress," explains Mothercare's Laura Ward. "Get a new one as the interior of a used mattress may have been permanently compressed by the previous baby’s weight, making it less comfortable and less safe.”

For babies under the age of 12 months, Laura recommends layers. “The amount of bedding depends on the room temperature (18°C is ideal) and what your baby is wearing, but we recommend a mix of sheets, blankets and a coverlet so that you can add or remove layers. Or try a baby sleeping bag.”

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Watch the cords

Keep furniture away from the windows. If it’s too close, your baby could reach the window cords – a major strangulation hazard. Use cord-safety devices.

Store away toys

Store toys in bins or boxes without lids. If your toy chest does have a lid, it should also have a spring-loaded mechanical arm for safety.

Use safety devices

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Watch the decorations

Install alarms

Invest in a starter pack of safety accessories, such as plug protectors and corner cushions. If you want to use a door barrier, go for a gate that screws into the wall or doorjam.

Think carefully when accessorising the room. Avoid heavy pictures and mirrors, or decorations with long ribbons or cords.

Anchor furniture

No matter how sturdy you think your furniture is, make sure it is anchored to the wall with braces or anchors. You’d be surprised how babies can make even the heaviest of furniture tip over – and the results could be deadly.

Finally, install smoke and carbon monoxide alarms throughout your home and check them regularly. Thanks to Mothercare for some very useful tips in this feature.

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43 THE BREAST ADVICE

WINTER

SUNSHINE

Sunshine is hard to come by this time of year – so make sure you’ve stocked up on the Vitamin D whether you’re breastfeeding or not, writes NUK breastfeeding advisor CLIODNA GILROY.

don’t know about you but I’m a bit nervous about the next heating bill coming into my house as I strongly suspect it is going to be the size of a phone book – but that’s the fun of the winter and those long long nights. Do you know what is making those nights even longer? My children. More specifically my children coughing up a lung in their sleep while I pace the floors waiting for them to wake up and whinge. Thankfully I was at NUK HQ a little while back and had the good sense to take home a few of the magic cups so now my children go to bed with non-spill cups of honey, lemon and warm water (my husband slapped the brandy out of my hand before I could add it, apparently it’s not the done thing). This is helping, but life these days seems to be an endless run of snotty noses, barky coughs and grey faces and I think everyone in the house (Mammy included) needs a tonic. There is nothing more stressful that the phone call from the school; you panic, thinking it’s a trip to the children’s hospital, and it is a massive relief (a minor irritation) when you have to collect your little one from the school because they are a little bit unwell. In fact, you get the suspicion that the teacher is also being driven demented by the barking cough, rather than it being an urgent need to send them home for the good of their health. I was recently at a seminar about children’s health and learned that due to our Irish winter sun, or lack thereof, we cannot make Vitamin

D between the months of October and April. So much for sending the kids into the garden in their pants to get a bit of sun. But this explains the grey faces and is why I have added Vitamin D to daily life in the Gilroy household. As many of you will know, there is a HSE policy to give your baby Vitamin D for the first 12 months of your baby’s life. It is important to remember that while breastfeeding is great, it’s not a source of Vitamin D and whether your baby is breast- or bottle-fed this policy applies and you should stick to it. I personally feel that 12 months is not enough and I include the supplement in daily life in my own home during the winter months. Now, for those of you expecting your first baby you may be taking note and buying some Vitamin D for your nursery. My advice is to get a Vitamin D that doesn’t have to live in the fridge so that you can leave it beside the nappies and wipes, somewhere you will be every day and therefore will remember to give it to your little one. Sticking with it is the key. For those of you reading this, who already have a little one, do you remember to give your baby Vitamin D? I was a little haphazard about it on my first and often wonder if that’s contributed to a slight bow to his legs now. I was far more diligent on my second two children and now I have kept up the Vitamin D during the winter months. The alternative is to book a sun holiday, chance would be a fine thing though!

“My advice is to get a Vitamin D that doesn’t have to live in the fridge so that you can leave it beside the nappies and wipes, somewhere you will be every day.”

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09/02/2017 14:47

44 PARENTING

THE MORE THE

MERRIER How do you prepare for more children? And when do you know you’re done? JEN HOGAN, herself mum to seven children, looks at what you need to consider before adding a new baby to your family, and talks to some parents who knew when they had reached their “number”.

aving a baby is a life-changing experience for which nothing can prepare you. The lack of sleep and me-time coupled with the abundance of love, poo and necessary clothes changes involve quite an adjustment, but that love I mentioned means that one day, you might possibly consider adding to your numbers! Knowing the right time, or even how many times to do this, if you’re lucky enough, is a very personal choice, but there are many things worth considering before taking the plunge into outnumbered-dom and beyond. So what are the things to consider? Is two really twice the fun? Are three thrice as nice and is four-plus just today’s parenting equivalent of no-man’s land?

Age gap between siblings There is no right or wrong age gap to have between children but there are very different experiences to be had when bigger or smaller age gaps occur. With a smaller age gap, babyhood can be very laborious on very little sleep, but the upside is that siblings can grow up with

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similar interests and similar activities that can keep both occupied at the same time. With a larger age gap, there is the advantage of having a sibling who understands what’s going on, is possibly less demanding and may even be somewhat of a help to their parents. The flip side here is that the children are unlikely to have very similar interests as they are not at a similar stage of childhood. Saying all this, however, life doesn’t always go as we might plan and our own personal “ideal” age gap may well not materialise for many different reasons. Whether siblings are close or not is much more likely to be influenced by their personalities than their age gaps and as any parent of more than one child knows, the same ingredients can still produce very different results!

Mounting costs There’s no denying that children are expensive. The good news about having a second or subsequent child is that you’ll probably already have a lot of the baby equipment such as a cot, pram and car seat. If you have the same gender

– you’ll even save on clothes! However, adorable little babies grow into equally adorable but much more financially demanding children. Afterschool activities, equipment and school books can all be surprisingly expensive. Then there’s the luxuries of holidays, family outings and treats etc. None of us have a crystal ball and it’s difficult to know what our financial position will be by the time these expenses come around, but it is important to have a sense of realism about them before taking the plunge. As individual as every child is, so is every parent and what’s important to one is not necessarily important for another. Prioritising expenses and what matters to each family is essential. This mumof-many is eternally grateful for progressive sibling discounts in a variety of afterschool activity options. And as for college – will it really harm them to have a part-time job to help with the expense?

Childcare The financial cost of childcare, while potentially substantial, is really only one aspect

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45 PARENTING

TWO, THREE, AND FOUR... AND HOW THEY SLOTTED IN! Two children PAULA FROM KILDARE HAS ONE GIRL AND ONE BOY “Irrespective of whether or not I’d had two girls or two boys, I was stopping at two,” she says. “My daughter was two and half when my son was born and she was old enough, I felt, to understand that he was a baby and couldn’t be dragged around like one of her dolls. Once we knew the sex of the baby we prepared her with a storybook called My New Brother. I was more relaxed on number two.” Paula adds: “His bottles weren’t heated and he was put in the cot to sleep as opposed to holding my daughter’s hand until she fell asleep. But two was plenty – I wouldn’t have gone through pregnancy and birth again for anything!”

Three children

for consideration. Working outside the home means a practical element also has to come into play and this very much depends on the nature of your work. Working 9-5 may make crèchebased childcare an option, but those working shift hours may well need to look elsewhere for their childcare solutions. Costs and availability of flexible options can be a deciding factor when it comes to adding another child to your brood. Staying at home may or may not be an option but that in itself brings about many changes. A definite myriad of things to consider here!

Existing demands Most of us have great ideas about the types of parent we’ll be – and then we actually have children. Parenthood tends to be very different to how we imagined it and while absolutely nothing beats the feeling of love you have for your child, the huge workload cannot go unnoticed. More children means more laundry, more cooking, more cleaning, more sleepless nights and in due course – more dreaded homework!

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In spite of all this, I don’t really subscribe to the notion that two is twice the work of one, that three is three times the work or even that seven is seven times the work of one. Subsequent children need different things from their parents to a first born. With a first born, you are your child’s sole playmate, comforter, protector and fixer of all things – and they are your guinea pig. With a second or subsequent child you are likely to be more relaxed. Your older child, in the meantime, is ready to assume that role of playmate, and will definitely be more enthused by the prospect of playing with Peppa Pig than you, knows how to make the toys work, and might even be able to distract your younger child long enough for you to finish your coffee! Balancing the demands of your existing children, work commitments and extended family commitments is no mean feat. Only we know how stretched we are by our own respective demands, which often run well beyond the number of children we have, and so it really is impossible to look at others and compare.

PAMELA FROM OFFALY HAS TWO BOYS AND ONE GIRL “I always thought I’d have four children until I had one!” says Pamela. “But after my daughter was born I still felt someone was missing. When my second son was born, I knew I was done. Number three just slotted in and went with the flow and I was much more relaxed. Three just felt right. I felt it was big enough to be a family and small enough for us to cope with. I can organise three. I knew if I had more, things would be a little more chaotic and that’s not for me.”

Four children PATRICIA FROM DUBLIN HAS FOUR GIRLS “I always thought I’d have four children but I found being a parent to one very difficult so I left a few years between my first and second child,” says Patricia. “Child Two, Three and Four came along in quick succession and were very much reared together. My eldest daughter helped me manage with buggies when they were all small together. I was more nervous with my fourth than I might have expected because she was so small at birth – much smaller than her sisters. She was probably a little more spoilt than the others. I knew four was my magic number, as I knew I would struggle to manage any more. I never cared that I had all girls, though people often asked if I wished I’d had a boy. I knew how lucky I was to have had four healthy daughters.”

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46 EARLY DAYS

Surviving

SLEEP DEPRIVATION They say it’s the worst form of torture, and having gone through the pain of a non-sleeping baby, CARLA GOWER, a clinical psychologist in Temple Street, would agree. But she’s survived to tell her story – and gives us her top tips for getting through the pain of sleep deprivation...

expected tiredness. But I’d worked nights on a helpline, done all-nighters in college. I’d trained as a clinical psychologist. I knew about sleep; I taught parents about sleep. I could do this. When I think back, I could weep at my naivety. Because nothing could have prepared me for the effects of almost a year of sleep deprivation. If you’re going through something similar, you’re not alone. In a recent survey of over 7,000 parents by Netmums and The Children’s Sleep Charity, 35 per cent described themselves as “regularly sleep deprived and exhausted”, 23 per cent stated that lack of sleep was affecting their wellbeing and mental health and 22 per cent said it impacted on their relationship. I’d like to share my own experience of parenting a sleep thief and pass on what I’ve learned. Initially, things were good. Once we were over the blur of the initial weeks and our wonder at why anyone allowed us be in charge of a tiny, helpless, actual human, James began sleeping five hours straight at night. That plus the discovery of the “side-lying” position for breastfeeding in bed meant that overall, we were coping pretty well. He struggled to fall asleep by himself so there was lots of rocking, but if that was all we had to worry about, we could manage, right? Those five hours were everything. Life, and we, began to feel almost normal. Then, when James was four months old, all hell broke loose. Maybe it was the four-month

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sleep regression, maybe his newborn naps on my chest had given him bad habits, or maybe karma was biting me in the bum for my earlier optimism. Whatever the reason (and I’ve long since given up on finding one), it seemed like one day James just stopped sleeping. We tried rocking, singing, co-sleeping, his own cot, swaddling, white noise, silence, a rock-solid bedtime routine. But every night, we battled to get him asleep while he battled to stay awake. Finally he’d nod off and ninja-like, I’d slowly lower him down. But as soon as he hit the mattress his eyes would fly open and he’d begin screaming; horrible, panicked sobs that wracked his entire body until he was picked up. And so the cycle would begin again. And again. Eventually, he’d become so exhausted he could be lowered without waking. I’d creep into bed, peel back the duvet and…“wahhhhh”. Sleep-deprived parents will know that heartsinking moment. We were slowly falling apart. If you’ve experienced those middle of the night wakings, you’ll know how lonely they can be. There were times when we were awake from midnight until 5am, when he closed his eyes only as the sun came up, nights when my husband walked the streets with him in his sling, afternoons when I openly cried as I walked through the park willing him to nap, even for ten minutes. Days and nights rolled into one and all I could talk, think and worry about was sleep. I was so tired I couldn’t think straight. I remember sit-

ting in the car as the lights went green and just blanking. My brain couldn’t function through the fog and it wasn’t until someone beeped that I remembered how to work gears and pedals together. It was torture. And through it all, I had no choice but to keep caring for, and loving, this beautiful and utterly dependent little guy. I never for a moment blamed him, but became pretty skilled at blaming myself. I thought of all the things I should have done

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47 EARLY DAYS

TIPS FOR MANAGING...

differently and compared myself endlessly to other mums whose babies slept through and – the Holy Grail– went down awake and settled themselves. The thought of James doing that seemed like an impossible dream. But you know what? He’s just turned one and over the past month, he’s cracked it. He goes into his cot (awake!) clutching his teddy and with white noise in the background. He rolls around, then just closes his eyes. It’s

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amazing to watch on the monitor and the novelty hasn’t worn off; I keep sending friends photos of myself drinking tea announcing “he’s been asleep 40 minutes! He’s down an hour!” He sleeps through the night and, more importantly, so do we. He’s a funny, mischievous kid with a great personality and I’m finally seeing just how amazing motherhood is. So if you’re struggling with sleep deprivation, I feel for you, I really do. It will get better!

✹ DON’T BLAME YOURSELF. Some babies sleep well, some don’t. Sure there are things you can do to help, but sometimes that’s just how they are and what worked for your sister, friend or neighbour’s cousin may not work for you. Comparing yourself to others will drive you crazy and just make you feel worse. ✹ ACCEPT HELP. Take offers of help when they come, whether it’s someone to watch babs while you nap or even just listen while you cry. Again and again I was overwhelmed by the kindness of others, and although my initial thought was to say no, accepting their kindness made a huge difference. ✹ BE HONEST. Although there’s lots of help offered with a newborn, over time that can fall away as people assume you’re ok. So if nobody is offering support, maybe it’s because nobody knows you need it. So please, ask for help if you need it. Being vulnerable with others is a powerful thing. ✹ GET OUT AND ABOUT. Even if you just want to stay in your jammies all day (and sometimes that’s ok too), try to get out once a day, just for a while. I’m lucky to have an amazing group of mum friends and our coffee dates were a lifeline. Even if you don’t know many people nearby, take a walk or find a mother and baby group (try Cuidiu or your community centre). ✹ BE KIND TO YOURSELF. You’re doing an amazing job. Sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture and with good reason; it can break you down physically, mentally and emotionally. Give yourself a break from trying to be superwoman. It’s ok not to clean or order pizza for dinner. ✹ TALK TO YOUR GP. Sleep deprivation can lead to low mood and depression. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, tearful or hopeless about the future, talk to your GP and see what your options are; maybe medication or therapy could help.

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48 PRACTICALS

Product Guide to:

DOUBLE PUSHCHAIRS

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49 PRACTICALS

Whether you’re expecting twins or are having another baby with a toddler already in the house, a double pushchair has become an essential for many families. Here’s what you need to know before investing...

nce the news of a pregnancy has sunk in, many of us start to think about the practicalities of having a little one in the house. There are certain things that you must buy or find, such as a car seat, bed and clothes, but there are other things that make your life far, far easier. If you’re planning on getting out and about with baby, some form of travel system or pushchair can be really useful. These can vary from extremely complex travel systems that “grow” with your baby, to simpler umbrella-fold pushchairs can can recline flat to accommodate a newborn. Whatever you decide upon can be dictated by budget and/or preferences. Things get slightly more complex when you are looking at two little ones. If you have twins, from a practical point of view, a twin pushchair is pretty essential, and if you’re having your second baby quickly after your first, transporting a heavy toddler and a newborn (especially if the toddler is having a strop) can feel near on impossible without something to carry them around. The solution is a twin pushchair or travel system, and the good news is that this sector of the market has developed hugely over the years so there’s more choice than ever. Here we answer some of your frequently asked questions about twin pushchairs/travel systems, and present some of our favourite models on the market.

think you might only need it for a short period of time, then buying a secondhand twin pushchair might be the answer. Just make sure the baby part reclines completely. Otherwise, getting a double pushchair that can convert back into a single one could be a good option.

size to a single buggy so fit easily in narrow passageways etc. These are available as a sturdier four-wheeler or a sporty three-wheeler, which can be easier to steer.

Are there different types of twin pushchairs?

Just like when you’re selecting a single buggy, it’s a good idea to consider your lifestyle when buying a double version. If you’re living in the city and use your buggy for shopping, then a tandem buggy might be the best option. Or if you’re going for walks in the country, then a sturdier sideby-side might be easier. Most importantly of all, check that your chosen model will fit through your front door, can store away simply and compactly in your home, is easy to fold and fits into your car boot, and can be taken on public transport, if needed. Remember that this is a big purchase for any parent, new or otherwise, so take your time and try out all available models before making your final choice.

There are two main types of double buggies – the side-by-side twins and the tandem (one in front of the other. Side-by-side pushchairs mean that both kids are treated equally, so there are no arguments over who gets to sit in front – so these might be ideal for twins. These are often easier to steer than the other option too. The downside is that they tend to be wide, so could be tricky for getting in and out of narrow doorways. Tandem buggies usually feature a seat in the back that can recline completely for a newborn and a larger toddler seat in the front, so are better for toddler/baby combos than twins. The advantage to these is that they are similar in

Are there any other features I should look out for?

Should I go for a model that changes into a double if needed? If you’re having a baby, and all things going well, are planning on adding to your family quickly, then a model that converts might be a good option. This has been the biggest development in the sector over the last few years – whereas once there were only a few very pricey models, now there are lots available at different price points and suitable for all sorts of combinations.

What about twins? If you are having twins, the key is to get a system where both seats can lie flat. Some systems are only suitable for a toddler and a baby, so make sure that your choice can hold two newborns, who must be reclined completely. If you’re opting for a full travel system, look for a model that can hold two infant carriers so you can put both car seats on at once.

How about secondhand? If you have a toddler already and pregnant again, then consider the amount of time for which you need a double pushchair. If you

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Double Pushchairs OUR TOP PICKS There are a myriad of great double pushchairs on the market – here are just a few of our favourites.

MULTI-WAY CÚPLA DUO, €599, BABY ELEGANCE Hats off to Irish brand Baby Elegance, who have revamped their Cúpla travel system into one of the most versatile around. It’s able to be used as a single buggy or pram but can also hold any combination of carrycot, toddler seat or car seat (with adaptors). Both seats can also be rear- or forwardfacing. So basically whatever you want, the Cúpla can do it!

DESIGNER PICK BUGABOO DONKEY, €1,619, TONY KEALYS A favourite among celebs, the Bugaboo Donkey can convert from a single to a double pushchair in three simple clicks. The system can house a single child, twins or even a toddler and a baby, but is still compact enough for shopping. There is also the option of a wheeled board for an older child to sit or stand.

ORIGINAL DOUBLE PHIL & TEDS SPORT WITH DOUBLE KIT, €748, TONY KEALYS One of the original double buggies suitable for a baby and a toddler is Phil & Teds, and it’s still a popular choice for those of us with babies close together in age. It’s also a great choice for zipping around town as it’s narrow enough for any doorway or shop aisle. It’s easily converted from a single to a double as your family changes.

ADAPTABLE MODEL ICANDY PEACH BLOSSOM, FROM €1,135, eire.icandyworld.com We love iCandy at maternity & infant for their sturdy travel systems that basically do exactly what you want but in a very beautiful way. The Peach Blossom is available in a wide variety of colours and can house twins, a single child, or a toddler and baby.

BUDGET BUY OUT ‘N’ ABOUT DOUBLE NIPPER, €479, TONY KEALYS One of the original sideby-side double buggies is the Out ‘n’ About, which is still compact enough for most doorways and shops. The seats also recline completely, which means it is suitable from birth for one or both children.

LIGHTWEIGHT CHOICE BABY JOGGER CITY MINI TWIN DOUBLE STROLLER, €599.99 This side-by-side model is popular among parents for its ease of steering – even with just one hand. It’s also light and narrow enough for a day around the shops. Even better, the seats can be adapted individually so children of different ages can be catered for.

FOR OLDER KIDS MACLAREN TWIN TRIUMPH PUSHCHAIR, €395, LITTLEWOODS IRELAND If you’re looking for something a little lighter than the standard adjustable travel system, then look to the wonderful Maclaren brand for older kids. Suitable from eight months, this model is great for travelling or longer trips and is great for slinging into the back of a car.

EASY ALTERNATIVE LASCAL MAXI BUGGYBOARD, €64.99, SMYTHS If you have an older toddler and expecting a baby and don’t want to go to the trouble and expense of a double buggy, then a BuggyBoard might be an answer. This model is suitable from the age of two onwards and fits onto 99 per cent of pushchairs.

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51 PARTNER CONTENT

FAMILY-FRIENDLY MOTORING WITH ŠKODA KODIAQ Coming to our shores in March, the ŠKODA KODIAQ is an impressive family SUV that boasts a number of fabulous features for growing families. March 2017 sees the launch of the eagerly anticipated ŠKODA KODIAQ, the first large seven-seater SUV offered by ŠKODA that sees the brand’s new design language transferred into the SUV segment. Based on the impressive VisionS concept shown at the 2016 Geneva Motor Show, the new KODIAQ offers an impressive combination of powerful design, generous space, great functionality, stateof-the art assistance systems and innovative connectivity solutions. Inside, the KODIAQ offers a spacious interior and possesses the largest boot within its class with a volume of up to 2,065L. In addition, class-leading rear head and legroom will further enhance passenger comfort. Based on the renowned MQB platform, the KODIAQ stretches 4.7 metres in length and boasts the largest wheel base in its class, which ensures optimal usage of the interior cabin space. The KODIAQ also offers over 30 Simply Clever features that offer practical and convenient assistance in everyday life, such as split folding and length adjustable rear seats as standard, an optional third row of seats, a crafty door edge protection system, electric child safety locks and the much loved Superb model feature of ŠKODA umbrellas fitted to the front door pockets, from the mid-spec Ambition model on. Irish Times motoring journalist Michael Sheridan took his 13-yearold son Noah on a road trip through Europe to test how the KODIAQ worked for families on long journeys and certainly wasn’t disappointed. The rear seating was a big hit with Noah – something to consider when you have a growing family. “Noah was impressed by the recline angles he could set the seat to and the comfort of the centre armrest. The optional rear seat back trays

The ŠKODA KODIAQ

with their nifty pull-out cup holders impressed too as did the rear heated seat option. By the end of the day Noah proclaimed the middle seats the most comfortable he had been in for quite some time – high praise.” Then there are the other impressive touches, as Michael explains. “The boot light is magnetic and removable so it can double up as a torch when changing a wheel, but there is also the ice scraper in the fuel filler cap and, of course, the front door mounted umbrellas. New are door edge protectors that pop out when you open the door and protect the paintwork.” The KODIAQ will be the new flagship model for the ŠKODA brand with brand new technologies available such as ŠKODA Connect mobile online services. ŠKODA Connect offers additional online infotainment services and navigation in real time, while

also providing remote access for increased connectivity and driver assistance. One such driver assistance feature is the emergency call (eCall) function that will automatically call the emergency services once an airbag is activated to ensure occupant safety. Irish pricing and specification has yet to be confirmed, however, it is anticipated that the new KODIAQ will feature a host of impressive standard specification such as 17-inch alloys and cruise control

on the entry Active trim level; 18inch alloys, front and rear parking sensors and 3-Zone Climatronic air-conditioning on the mid spec Ambition trim level, and 19” alloy wheels, LED headlights and leather upholstery available as standard on the Style trim level. “Our KODIAQ road trip proved, if proof were needed, that ŠKODA is a brand to take seriously. KODIAQ is a very impressive family-friendly SUV, after all Noah liked it,” concluded Michael.

FAMILY-FRIENDLY FEATURES • • • • •

Split folding and length adjustable rear seats as standard An optional third row of seats The largest boot within its class with a volume of up to 2,065L Front and rear parking sensors ŠKODA Connect mobile online services

FURTHER INFORMATION ON ŠKODA KODIAQ CAN BE FOUND AT WWW.SKODA.IE

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52 HEALTH

A to Z

OF SUPPLEMENTS Ever wondered what’s in your multivitamin? Or what supplement does what? Find out in our ultimate A to Z guide to vitamins and minerals this is your cut-out-and-keep guide!

healthy diet should, in theory, be all you need to keep well – but there are times in life when you really do need a supplement. Plus there are other times when you mightn’t necessarily have to take anything, but a simple supplement might make a world of difference in your energy levels or general health. We talk a lot about supplements in maternity & infant, but this issue we’re going for the ultimate – an A-Z guide to all those mysterious vitamins and minerals printed on those labels. This is your cut-out-and-keep special – but remember to always get medical advice from your doctor or pharmacist before taking any supplement, especially when pregnant or breastfeeding, as there are some supplements that could be harmful to you or your baby.

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A is for… Vitamin A Vitamin A is a fat-soluble antioxidant that plays a powerful role in maintaining healthy vision, neurological function and healthy skin. Our main talking point here is a warning – Vitamin A in the form of retinol (the animal form) can be toxic to an unborn baby in large doses. Vitamin A in the plant form (beta-carotene) is okay, although many prenatal vitamins don’t contain Vitamin A at all. This is why you should always go for a specific prenatal vitamin rather than your standard multivitamin supplement – talk to your doctor or pharmacist if in doubt.

B IS FOR… THE B VITAMINS

REFERRED TO AS VITAMIN B COMPLEX, THE EIGHT WATER-SOLUBLE B VITAMINS — B1, B2, B3, B5, B6, B7, B9, B12 — PLAY AN IMPORTANT ROLE IN KEEPING OUR BODIES HEALTHY AND WELL. EACH B VITAMIN HAS ITS OWN SPECIFIC JOB – FROM PREVENTING MEMORY LOSS, TO PROMOTING HEALTHY SKIN AND HAIR, TO HELPING US MAXIMISE THE ENERGY FROM OUR FOOD. MORE ON THESE LATER IN THIS FEATURE.

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53 HEALTH C is for… Vitamin C Fruits and vegetables are essential for good health, but in particular, the variety of vitamins and minerals in fruit and veg is useful during conception. Eating citrus fruit provides your body with Vitamin C, which is needed to help your body absorb iron. The advice generally is to eat a rainbow of fruit and veg, to ensure you get as many different vitamins and minerals, all of which are essential in keeping your body healthy. Plus, of course, C also stands for calcium, which is essential for bone health, and therefore is especially vital for growing children and pregnant women – just make sure you have your Vitamin D too (see next point).

E IS FOR… VITAMIN E

VITAMIN E IS IMPORTANT FOR OUR NERVOUS SYSTEM AND MUSCLES; IT IS ALSO A VALUABLE ANTIOXIDANT. IT’S FOUND IN VARIOUS FOODS INCLUDING VEGETABLE OILS, WHEATGERM, WHOLEGRAIN CEREALS, AND GREEN LEAFY VEGETABLES. ALTHOUGH VITAMIN E DEFICIENCY IS RARELY SEEN IN HEALTHY ADULTS, FOR PREGNANT WOMEN, INSUFFICIENT DIETARY VITAMIN E MAY LEAD TO COMPLICATIONS SUCH AS PRE-ECLAMPSIA AND THE BABY BEING BORN SMALL. A HEALTHY DIET AND THE AMOUNT IN YOUR PRENATAL VITAMIN SHOULD BE ENOUGH, HOWEVER.

Vitamin D helps you use the calcium you eat and so is an essential component for bone health. Vitamin D is made from the sun’s rays and because of the poor UV light in Ireland from October to March, Vitamin D3 cannot be made in the skin then. Pregnant women need 10ug (400IU) of Vitamin D every day. It is only found naturally in a few foods such as oily fish, some fortified cereals and fortified milks. It is now a public health policy that all infants born in Ireland must receive Vitamin D3 drops from birth until their first birthday, whether babies are breast- or bottle-fed.

F IS FOR… FOLIC ACID

THE B VITAMIN FOLATE CAN HELP PREVENT NEURAL TUBE DEFECTS LIKE SPINA BIFIDA, BUT UNFORTUNATELY IT IS DIFFICULT TO GET ENOUGH FOLATE THROUGH DIET ALONE. FOR THIS REASON, IT’S ESSENTIAL TO TAKE A 400UG FOLIC ACID SUPPLEMENT FOR THREE MONTHS BEFORE CONCEIVING TO PROTECT AGAINST NEURAL TUBE DEFECTS, AND TO CONTINUE TO TAKE THIS SUPPLEMENT FOR THE FIRST FEW MONTHS OF YOUR PREGNANCY. AS ABOUT HALF OF PREGNANCIES ARE UNPLANNED, IT’S RECOMMENDED THAT EVERY WOMAN OF CHILDBEARING AGE SHOULD TAKE A FOLIC ACID SUPPLEMENT.

K is for… Vitamin K

I is for… Iron Iron is essential when you are pregnant, as your increased blood volume and a growing baby quickly deplete your levels of iron, but too little iron at conception can not only affect your baby’s early development but also put you at risk of iron-deficiency anemia during pregnancy and after birth. Make sure you eat iron-rich foods like lean red meat and dark leafy green veg regularly, and watch your Vitamin C levels, as this helps your body absorb the iron.

D is for… Vitamin D

M is for… Magnesium Magnesium is important for regulating muscle and nerve function, blood sugar levels and blood pressure, and for making bone and DNA. Magnesium is also important for keeping cortisol (the stress hormone) levels under control, which is important when conceiving. A deficiency in magnesium can also cause muscle spasms in the fallopian tubes, which could make it difficult for the egg to travel to the uterus for implantation. Magnesium is found naturally in legumes, nuts, seeds, wholegrains, some dairy products and green leafy vegetables, and sometimes added to fortified foods like breakfast cereals.

Vitamin K is important for blood clotting and healthy bones, and is found in foods like green leafy vegetables, vegetable oils, fruits like blueberries and figs, meat, cheese, eggs, and soybeans. Newborn babies have low levels of Vitamin K in their blood, which can occasionally cause bleeding problems known as Vitamin K Deficiency Bleeding – and so all newborn babies are offered a Vitamin K injection shortly after birth.

N IS FOR… NIACIN

ALSO KNOWN AS VITAMIN B3, NIACIN IS IMPORTANT FOR THE DIGESTIVE SYSTEM, SKIN AND NERVES, AS WELL AS HELPING TO TURN FOOD INTO ENERGY – SO PLAYS A VITAL ROLE IN A MULTIVITAMIN IN BOOSTING YOUR ENERGY LEVELS. IT’S FOUND IN MILK, EGGS, RICE, LEAN MEATS, LEGUMES AND FISH, AS WELL AS IN SOME FORTIFIED FOODS. LIKE THE OTHER B VITAMINS, NIACIN IS WATER SOLUBLE, WHICH MEANS YOU MUST HAVE A REGULAR SUPPLY OF THE VITAMIN, AS ANYTHING LEFT OVER IN THE BODY LEAVES THROUGH YOUR URINE.

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54 HEALTH O is for… Omega-3

P IS FOR… POTASSIUM

Research suggests that a diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids may help regulate ovulation and improve egg quality; oily fish like salmon is the best source of omega-3 fatty acids. Some types of fish contain mercury, so if you’re trying for a baby, experts suggest that you stick to just two servings of fish like canned tuna, salmon and cod, and avoiding swordfish, tilefish, king mackerel, and shark because these have the highest mercury levels.

POTASSIUM IS IMPORTANT FOR MUSCLE STRENGTH, NERVE FUNCTIONING, AND A HEALTHY CARDIOVASCULAR SYSTEM , AND IS FOUND IN RED MEAT AND CHICKEN, FISH, TOMATOES, POTATOES, BANANAS, CITRUS FRUITS, MELON AND DRIED APRICOTS. POTASSIUM LEVELS CAN BE DEPLETED BY SODIUM, SO IF YOU EAT TOO MUCH SALT, YOU COULD BE DEFICIENT IN POTASSIUM. SIGNS OF DEFICIENCY INCLUDE MUSCLE CRAMPS AND SPASMS, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE, IRREGULAR HEARTBEAT AND FEELINGS OF LOW ENERGY AND DIZZINESS. POTASSIUM IS PARTICULARLY IMPORTANT AFTER MENOPAUSE, WHEN IT’S BELIEVED A WOMAN’S RISK OF STROKE DOUBLES THANKS TO HORMONE CHANGES.

R IS FOR… RIBOFLAVIN

ANOTHER OF THE B VITAMINS (B2), RIBOFLAVIN IS VITAL FOR THE GROWTH, DEVELOPMENT, AND FUNCTION OF THE CELLS IN YOUR BODY. LIKE SOME OF THE OTHER B VITAMINS, IT PLAYS A BIG ROLE IN TURNING YOUR FOOD INTO ENERGY. WHEN PREGNANT, IT SUPPORTS YOUR BABY’S BONE, MUSCLE, AND NERVE DEVELOPMENT – BUT YOUR GENERAL PRENATAL VITAMIN AND A HEALTHY DIET SHOULD GIVE YOU ENOUGH OF THIS VITAMIN, UNLESS OTHERWISE DIRECTED BY YOUR GP. GOOD FOOD SOURCES INCLUDE MILK, CHEESE, BANANAS, MEAT, YEAST, GREEN LEAFY VEGETABLES, TOMATOES, ALMONDS AND FORTIFIED CEREALS/BREADS.

S is for… Selenium A trace element found in meat, eggs, dairy products, cereals and seafood, selenium is important for thyroid gland function, DNA production and protecting the body from infection and damage caused by free radicals. It also plays a big role in reproduction. Deficiency can cause a deterioration in the quality and mobility of a man’s sperm, while in women, selenium deficiencies may lead to gestational complications, miscarriages and the damaging of the nervous and immune systems of the unborn baby. Too much selenium can lead to health difficulties; your prenatal/general multivitamin and a healthy diet should provide you with plenty.

T is for… Thiamin Also known as Vitamin B1, thiamin is important for helping to turn your food into energy, and for the growth, development, and function of the cells in your body. Thiamin deficiency is rare, as it’s widely found in common foods like wholegrains and fortified cereals, meat and fish, and legumes, seeds and nuts. Thiamin also helps your nervous system, muscles, and heart function normally and is essential for your baby’s brain development during pregnancy.

Z IS FOR… ZINC

ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT MINERALS FOR FERTILITY IN BOTH SEXES IS ZINC, BUT MANY OF OUR FOODS ARE STRIPPED OF THIS ESSENTIAL NUTRIENT THANKS TO PROCESSING AND REFINING. ZINC HELPS THE IMMUNE SYSTEM FIGHT OFF BACTERIA AND VIRUSES, AND PLAYS A VITAL ROLE IN THE MAKING OF PROTEIN AND DNA. DURING PREGNANCY, INFANCY, AND CHILDHOOD, THE BODY ALSO NEEDS ZINC TO GROW AND DEVELOP PROPERLY. FOODS PARTICULARLY HIGH IN ZINC INCLUDE MANGOES, PUMPKIN SEED AND FISH, ESPECIALLY OYSTERS. LOOK FOR ORGANIC, FRESH FOOD IF POSSIBLE.

SUPPLEMENT YOUR SKIN! As you emerge from your winter cocoon, you might have found that your skin is looking less than luscious. Wholefoods nutritionist NICOLA MURPHY tells us her top supplements to give your skin a boost this spring. ✹ HYALURONIC ACID Central heating, heating in cars, buses and the harsh cold air all contribute to dehydrated skin in winter months. Drinking plenty of water is vital to moisturise the skin from the inside and it helps to flush toxins away too. If you suffer from very dry skin, you may benefit from an hyaluronic acid supplement, such as Higher Nature Aeterna Gold Hyaluronic acid. Hyaluronic acid holds up to 1000 times its own weight in water so is vital to retain moisture in the skin. ✹ VITAMIN A, E, AND B Give the skin a good nutritional boost during the winter by including foods rich in Vitamin A, E, B vitamins, Zinc and Essential Fats. Fish, carrots, sweet potatoes, green leafy vegetables, berries, avocados, pumpkin seeds are just some of the foods that will provide these nutrients, or go for a supplement like Quest. Avoiding stodgy carbohydrate and sugary foods will help too as they tend to lead to sluggish bowels and poor complexion. Avoid too much salt in the diet as it will further dehydrate the body and skin. ✹ OMEGA 3 FATS Good fats act as another internal moisturiser, preventing flaky, dry skin. Consuming oily fish, nuts, seeds and avocados will all help to boost the intake of essential fatty acids, or you can supplement with a product like Eskimo Omega 3 fish oil with vitamin E to ensure that your skin is well moisturised.

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D E E N U O D Y A E N L O U R I O THE HE LIFE Y T R FO Low iron levels can leave you tired. But not everyone finds conventional iron food supplements easy to take. Spatone® is different. • 100% natural iron rich water that has been scientifically proven to help top up your iron levels. • Fewer of the unpleasant side effects associated with conventional iron food supplements.1

Feel the difference Food Supplement

Iron contributes to the reduction of tiredness and fatigue.

Food Supplements should not be used as a substitute for a balanced diet and healthy lifestyle. If pregnant or breast feeding always consult a healthcare professional before taking any food supplement. 1 McKenna, D. etal (2003).Clin Lab Haem, 18, 23-27

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56 PARENTING

DROPPING THE

DUMMY For some parents, a dummy, or soother, is a godsend for helping their child sleep at night. But what happens when the child gets older and you need to break that dummy addiction? Parenting expert GINA FORD gives us her top advice for dumping the soother.

ith babies between six months and a year, a ‘cold turkey’ approach seems to work within a few days and with older children, you can reason with them. However, I find that with children during the second year, taking the dummy away can sometimes cause even more sleep issues than it resolves. If your toddler reaches one year and is still dependent on his dummy, particularly to get asleep, my advice is to wait until he is over two and start trying to get rid of the dummy then. It’s rare that a child with a dummy dependency will give it up without a strategy and encouragement from his or her parent but the strategies outlined below are easier to implement when he gets older. If you are planning to eliminate the dummy, the following points should first be considered: ✹ DO NOT ALLOW RELATIVES OR FRIENDS TO MAKE FUN of your child for using a

dummy. In my experience, comments such as ‘only babies have dummies’ can make a sensitive child feel very inferior, causing him much stress and increasing his need for the dummy. ✹ NEVER ATTEMPT to get rid of the dummy just prior to or straight after the arrival of a new baby. ✹ YOUR TODDLER OR CHILD SHOULD BE IN GOOD HEALTH and fully recovered

from any illness when you attempt to wean him off his dummy. ✹ ELIMINATING THE DUMMY should be avoided when major changes are about to take place, for example around the time of moving house, starting nursery or a mother returning to work.

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If your child is above one and still using his dummy, I would restrict the use of the dummy to sleep times only and only when they are sleeping in their cot. Put several dummies into his cot so he can locate at least one without waking fully. However, if your toddler is waking several times a night between the ages of one and two, and unable to locate a dummy for himself, then you may have no option but to get rid of it entirely. If your toddler is used to having a dummy during the day as well as at night, I would advise that you get rid of it over a weekend when you will be able to elicit help in keeping your toddler busy with lots of activities. He will most probably be miserable for the first day, but getting him out of the house doing things that require lots of physical energy will help to minimise the whingeing. When at home try to involve him with finger painting, gardening and water play. It is also probably better not to attempt to put him into his cot for his midday nap as it is unlikely that he will settle without his dummy, and you do not want to get him worked up into a state. If you are out and about, he will hopefully have a catnap in the buggy or car. That evening, when you settle him to sleep, you can try introducing a special new toy that he will hopefully use as a replacement comforter, but obviously not one so small that he would end up sucking it or losing it in his cot. Your toddler will more than likely be very difficult to settle and I would recommend that you have a short-term strategy in place for comforting him while he gets used to not having the dummy. If he is getting very upset at bedtime, you may find that for the first few nights, you will need to stay in his room un-

til he goes asleep, to reassure him. After the first couple of nights, if he is settling to sleep more quickly, you can then start the gradual withdrawal method, in which the parent initially stays with the child who has been put to bed for a short spell and returning as and when necessary so the child doesn’t feel any sense of isolation when going to sleep. Every couple of nights the time spent out of the room is increased until the baby or toddler starts to fall asleep while the parent is out of the room. This approach can be used until he has learned to settle himself to sleep without the dummy. With a child over two years, one has to be much more careful in their approach

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57 PARENTING

“I would restrict the use of the dummy to sleep times only and only when they are sleeping in their cot.”

when gettng rid of the dummy. The mind and imagination of a child this age are developing very rapidly, and taking the dummy away suddenly could cause much more emotional upset than it would with a younger child. If your child is still using the dummy during the day, restrict it to being used in his room. Gradually decreasing his dependency on it will make it easier for you to persuade him to give it up. My cousin persuaded her little girl of three years to give all her dummies to the tiny babies who were in hospital ‘and didn’t have a dummy’. For being so thoughtful to these little babies she was allowed to choose a special new toy. Another good idea is to get a friend to come

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around and explain that all the shops are out of dummies and her baby really needs one. Making a nice gesture of wrapping the dummy up in pretty paper to give to the baby often makes an older child feel important. Sometimes ‘forgetting’ to pack the dummy when you go on holiday can work. The fact that children are normally so excited about going on holiday, and bedtimes are usually much later with no pressure of work for parents during the day, can help get over the first couple of days of the dummy being eliminated. Trips to the beach and extra treats of an ice cream for being such a good boy or girl managing without their dummy will also help make the first couple of days go more smoothly.

FURTHER READING

Extracted and adapted from Your Baby and Toddler Problems Solved, by Gina Ford (Vermilion). Available in all good bookshops now.

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58 HEALTH

The

WEIGHT ISSUE There’s a huge and growing problem of childhood obesity in Ireland today, but how do you discuss weight issues with children without creating self-esteem issues? With girls reportedly talking of “diets” in primary school, ANDREA MARA looks at how we can begin a healthy debate about weight.

reland has a much-publicised growing obesity problem, and it’s affecting children too, with one in four now classified as overweight. The government has launched a ten-year plan to combat obesity, and for parents who are keen to make changes, there’s plenty of information available on how to do that. But how should parents talk to children about weight issues, without damaging selfesteem? And how do you work out if your child is overweight in the first place? “There IS a need to check your child’s weight, as about one in three parents underestimates it,” says registered dietitian Orla Walsh. “In one study, 97 per cent of parents of overweight boys and 88 per cent of parents of overweight girls said their kids were

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‘about the right weight’.” The research, from NYU, found that parents failed to spot obesity because they were comparing children to peers, rather than to medical standards. But what are the medical standards and how do you find them? Walsh has a number of solutions, starting with your local doctor. “It’s advisable to encourage your GP to check your child’s weight when going to them for check-ups. Medical professionals use centile charts to assess for overweight and obesity in kids.” Even if you’re not due a trip to the GP, you can find centile charts on HSE.ie, under ‘growth monitoring’. “By plotting a child’s height and weight, you can monitor him or her over their childhood and compare their weight with their height. It’s natural for a taller child to weigh

more,” says Walsh. An easy option is an online BMI calculator, but even without measuring, there are indicators to look out for, says Walsh. “One simple way to know if your child is overweight is by the clothes they wear. Are they wearing the right age clothes, and if so, are they tight around the belly area? If a parent is having to buy clothes that are much older than their child, and tight around the chest and waist, then there is a great chance that their child is overweight.” There are some rules of thumb too. “Children should be about half their age in stone,” advises Walsh. “And when a child is over the age of five years, the general rule is that their waist circumference needs to be less than half their height.”

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59 HEALTH

Addressing the issue Establishing that your child is overweight is the first hurdle – after that comes the challenge of how to approach it. Registered dietitian Gillian Galway has experience training families on how to raise the issue of weight, and she has this advice. “I think parents should avoid the words ‘fat’ or ‘obese’, but ‘overweight’ is OK – or say ‘weight has gotten ahead of height’. BMI can be described as looking at their weight for their height.” Galway says it’s about focusing on the positive rather than the negative. “Being positive with the child is really important, and encouraging everyone to get healthy as a family. Children will follow their parents’ lead, so active days out and cooking healthy recipes can be fun, and can allow the child and parent to spend quality time together. Avoid negative comments or placing the child on a strict diet.” Of course it’s not always just about the child – you may need to look inwards too, says Harriet Parsons, psychotherapist and services manager with Bodywhys, the Eating Disorders Association of Ireland. “As a parent it’s important that you think about your own relationship and your own feelings about your body, weight and shape, because this is something that your children will hear, pick up on, and learn from.” And what about that word “fat” – is it ever OK to use it? Anecdotally, there are mixed views. Generally it has become a loaded term and has fallen out of everyday use, at least in polite conversation. But on the flip side, there are body-positivity activists on Instagram and Twitter who are reclaiming the word fat – making the point that it’s just a descriptive word like “thin” or “small”. And although it has become less politically correct to use it – and it’s certainly not common to hear parents calling their children fat – I have heard mothers use it as a warning to their children, telling them “sweets will make you fat”. Parsons’ advice is that we shouldn’t use it. “The word ‘fat’ has many different connotations, and it can mean different things to different people. It can be an extremely destructive word and one to be avoided. Parents should avoid associating their child’s self worth, their abilities, their character and personality with any one aspect of their physicality, or image.”

– eating disorders have no boundaries and they don’t care who they affect or hurt.” Byrne explains how her disorder developed. “I grew up in a family who placed so much emphasis on weight, size and image. It was talked about; family members were criticised about their weight, and food – eating it or not eating it – was an obsession.”

likely to become obese adults. The health implications for children in the short term include hip, knee and back pain, higher risk of asthma, bullying and stigmatisation, high cholesterol and high blood pressure. The long-term effects include poorer educational achievement, heart disease, some cancers, as well as a risk of developing type 2 diabetes. It’s sad to think that

“I would urge parents not to obsess over a child’s weight in front of, or to, a child. Allowing your own fears to control you when talking to a child is a big no, no.” She has this advice. “I would urge parents not to obsess over a child’s weight in front of, or to, a child. Allowing your own fears to control you when talking to a child is a big no, no. Please talk to your doctor in private about your concerns, ask their advice – they can see your child and will know your child’s health issues.” Orla Walsh sums up why it’s important to check children’s weight and to deal with it if there’s a problem. “Obese children are more

many Irish children will not achieve what they want to achieve in life due to ill-health associated with poor diet, inactivity and obesity.” When taking action, she advises focusing on health rather than weight. “Excess weight is only a symptom of a lifestyle that doesn’t support wellness. Instead of mentioning weight, discuss all the ways being less healthy negatively impacts someone’s life. Motivate them to focus on wellness, not thinness. Children have the right to be healthy.”

PROMOTING HEALTHY HABITS ORLA WALSH gives her tips for managing kids’ weight in a healthy way.

Mon Tue

Wed T hu

Fri

Sat Sun

Jack May Alan

✹ RAINBOW CHART: Keep a rainbow chart in the house and make it competitive. The more colours of fruits and vegetables each member of the house eats, the closer they should be to a non-food prize!

✹ SCREEN TIME: Try suggesting that children must earn screen time with exercise time – the more time a child spends watching TV, the more likely they are to be overweight or obese.

✹ SUGARY DRINKS: Sugar-laden drinks increase the risk of childhood obesity and cause issues with teeth. Remove them from the house and have milk and water as the only options.

✹ HEALTHY HABITS: Start by creating a new ‘norm’ in your house. Changing the way we live and eat on a daily basis will help form good healthy habits. Healthy eating, like a lot of other things, is a habit.

Self-esteem Someone who has first-hand experience of having her self-esteem eroded through comments about weight is psychologist Deborah Byrne (Deborah Byrne Psychology Services). “I know what it’s like to have an eating disorder, and I had a teenage daughter with an eating disorder. And yes I’m a psychologist

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60 HEALTH

What exercise for pre-schoolers? In the battle against childhood obesity, the HSE has begun a number of initiatives to educate parents and individuals. One of these is a website, www.getirelandactive.ie, which contains lots of tips on getting active at any age. Here’s what the HSE advises for pre-schoolers...

Babies:

Toddler:

Children:

0 - 1 years

1 - 3 years

3 - 6 years

It is just as important for newborn babies to be active as it is for toddlers and older children. Babies need lots of opportunities for free movement in a safe, supervised and nurturing play environment. Before your baby begins to crawl, encourage your baby to be physically active by reaching, rolling, pulling, pushing and learning to move their head, arms, legs and body. Babies need to be active several times a day, especially through interactive floor-based play, including tummy time. Play on a floor mat with your baby – it’s a good excuse to have a lie down and a little relax while you are at it! It’s also recommended to place your baby on his or her tummy for a short time every day too. This will help to stretch and develop your baby’s muscles. Try putting a toy just outside their reach, so they have to make an extra effort to stretch and reach for it. Always supervise your baby when playing on their tummy. Never let your baby fall asleep on their tummy. It is also important that the amount of time your baby is not active is limited to no more than an hour at a time, except when they are sleeping. This includes time spent in restricted positions in cars seats, bouncers and walkers. Time watching television is not recommended at all for children under two years of age.

Toddlers who are walking need to be active every day for at least three hours spread throughout the day. This includes light activities, such as building blocks or playing on the floor and more vigorous activities such as running and jumping. Three hours might seem like a lot, but young children are naturally active and, as you probably know already, are always ‘on the go’. Getting out and about with a young child as much as possible is a good idea for both you and the child! Try walking in the woods, going on a nature trail, heading to the playground - or if all else fails (and the weather is bad), a soft-play facility. Being active during the day means better sleep at night too. It is also important that the amount of time your young child is not active is limited to no more than an hour at a time except when they are sleeping. Time watching television or other screen-related activities should be limited to a maximum of one hour per day for children over two years of age. Rest in between active play is important too, napping and activities such as drawing, listening to stories and making puzzles all contribute to your child’s overall health and development.

All children aged over three who are capable of walking unaided should be physically active every day for at least three hours spread throughout the day. Of this, at least one hour should consist of structured energetic activity such as swimming or playing a game of chase. It does not all need to take place at once - short sessions of 10-15 minutes can be built up over the day. It is also important that the amount of time your young child is not active is limited to no more than an hour at a time except when they are sleeping. Time watching television or other screen-related activities should be limited to a maximum of one hour per day. Children need daily opportunities to play outdoors as well as indoors. Children also need daily opportunities to develop a wide range of movement skills such as using a climbing frame, riding a bike, playing in water, chasing games and ball games. Get creative as you search for activities your child enjoys. If your child is artistically inclined, take a nature hike to collect leaves and rocks for use in a collage. If your child likes to climb, head for the nearest indoor play area. If your child likes to read, walk or bike to a local library for a book. Or simply turn on your child’s favourite music and dance in the living room.

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61 COMPETITION

Congratulations to Cliodhna Martin, the winner of last issue’s competition!

WIN! A RELAXING TWO-NIGHT GETAWAY TO

DUNBOYNE CASTLE HOTEL & SPA, CO MEATH!

ake some time out and enjoy a break to the countryside with our fabulous spring competition. Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa, nestled in 21 rolling acres of historic Co Meath, is the perfect setting for a spring escape! Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa is offering one very lucky reader the chance to win two nights of blissful luxury, where you will be treated to breakfast each morning and dinner on an evening of your choice in the 2 AA Rosette award-winning Ivy Restaurant, where Executive Head Chef John Nagle creates innovative, seasonal menus based on ingredients from the abundance of local producers. Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa is the ideal location to relax and enjoy some quality time together in picturesque surroundings. Relax in the gorgeous Seoid Spa, where you will both get to enjoy time in the soothing thermal suite, restorative hydrotherapy pool and bubbling outdoor hot tub. Indulge in a little me time with the paper in a comfortable armchair or treat yourself to delicious food from Executive Head Chef John Nagle as you while away the relaxing evening. If you’re not lucky enough to win on this occasion or to find out more information visit www.dunboynecastlehotel. com or call +353 1 801 3500.

HOW TO WIN To win, simply log on to www.maternityandinfant.ie/dunboyne and answer the following question: Where is Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa situated? a) Co Meath b) Co Louth

Terms and Conditions: Prize includes 2 bb + 1 dinner with comp thermal suite access , non-transferable and subject to availability. Closing date for all entries is 27th April 2017. Prize is non-transferable. Competition is not open to employees of Ashville Media Group or Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa, Co Meath. No cash or gift card will be awarded in lieu of stated prize. If any of the items offered are unavailable, a suitable alternative will be provided. Winner will be selected at random from a draw and will be contacted by phone. Competition entrants must be resident in the island of Ireland. One entry per person. Competition is also subject to all usual terms and conditions.

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Dunboyne Castle Hotel & Spa, Dunboyne, Co. Meath T: +353 1 801 3500 | www.dunboynecastlehotel.com

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62 AWARDS

2011 Mothercare wins Best Baby Store four years in a row

2012 maternity & infant toddler event

2010

2013

The amazing Benhaffaf family wins the Special Merit Award

Our first year of Product Testing across the nation

2014 2009 Winner of Young Achiever of the Year, Susie Power, presented by Amanda Brunker

Maureen Forrest, winner of the Outstanding Achievement Award

2015 Partnered with the RTĂ&#x2030; Today show

2008 Introduced the first ever six People Awards

2007 The maternity & infant magazine Parentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Choice Awards was born!

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2016 The beautiful Lidl Mum of the Year winner, Carla Smith

2017

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63 AWARDS

CATEGORIES PRODUCT AWARDS CATEGORIES ✹ Best Baby Retailer ✹ Best Infant Car Seat ✹ Best Car Seat for age 1+ ✹ Best Buggy ✹ Best Stroller ✹ Best Baby Gadget ✹ Best Travel System ✹ Best Baby Carrier/Sling ✹ Best Feeding Product

SPONSORS We’ve worked with a lot of fantastic sponsors over the past 10 years: Sudocrem, Mothercare, Maxi-Cosi, Gaviscon Extra, Baby Elegance and Boots are just a few companies that have been involved, and we would like to say a huge thank you to everyone, all the way back to when we first launched in 2007!

✹ Best Breastfeeding Product ✹ Best Baby Food/Range ✹ Best Baby Monitor ✹ Best Safety Product ✹ Best Baby Wipes ✹ Best Bath Time Products ✹ Best Pain Relief for Kids ✹ Best Nappy Product ✹ Best Sleep Product ✹ Best Potty Training Product ✹ Best Holiday Product ✹ Best Baby Thermometer

PEOPLE AWARDS CATEGORIES ✹ Miracle Baby of the Year ✹ Child Hero of the Year ✹ Business Parent of the Year ✹ Mum of the Year ✹ Dad of the Year ✹ Grandparent of the Year ✹ Super Sibling of the Year ✹ Young Achiever of the Year ✹ GP of the Year ✹ Pharmacist of the Year ✹ Midwife of the Year ✹ Boots Outstanding Achievement Award

✹ Best Baby/Toddler Supplement ✹ Best Remedy for Baby Colic ✹ Best Skincare for Mum

CHARITY PARTNERS Over the last 10 years, we’ve raised over a whopping 50,000 for charity! We’ve partnered with many amazing charities such as Barnardos, Children’s Miracle Network, make a wish, and Rapunzel Foundation, and we’ve even had charities such as Féileacháin win our Special Merit Award in the People Awards!

✹ Best Pregnancy Supplement ✹ Best Family Brand ✹ Best Family Cleaning Product ✹ Best Family Detergent ✹ Best Time Saving Product ✹ Innovative Product of the Year ✹ Best Family Car ✹ Best Family Friendly Hotel/ Holiday Destination ✹ Best Santa Experience ✹ Best Family Health Insurance ✹ Best in Fertility ✹ Best Parenting Blog

For event enquiries, please contact Aoife, Event Manager, on 01 432 2232 or email aoife.mcdonald@ashvillemediagroup.com

maternityandinfant.ie/awards

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THE 2017 BOOTS MATERNITY & INFANT AWARDS TAKES PLACE ON

13TH OCTOBER!

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64 PARTNER CONTENT

HELPING MOTHERS SLEEP IN PEACE Imagine feeling that your baby is not safe while you sleep – this is the reality for mothers in Bangladesh night after night after night. But you can help Concern make a difference for these mothers by giving them and their children a safe place to sleep. Here’s how...

t’s past midnight and you’re exhausted. You’ve found a sheltered spot near the well-lit high court building and arranged your few belongings so that they’re all within reach. Your five-yearold daughter is asleep on the pavement beside you but you’re too scared to rest – you’ve heard that another child was taken in the night recently and you have no way of keeping her safe while you sleep. So you sit on the cold, hard ground, willing yourself to stay alert through the long hours of the night… Keeping your baby safe, warm and fed is a mother’s basic instinct, but unfortunately the scenario outlined above isn’t the stuff of fiction or nightmares – it’s part of daily life for many of the tens of thousands of women and children who have no choice but to live on Dhaka’s streets – where Concern has been helping and transforming lives in recent times.

From dreams to nightmares Every year, families from rural areas follow their hopes and dreams to Dhaka – the capital of Bangladesh – in search of work and the chance to build a better life. But even in the city jobs are hard to come by, and it doesn’t take much for those dreams to turn into a nightmare of poverty, hunger and homelessness. With no work and nowhere to live, survival for homeless families anywhere is a daily struggle. The street is no place for a child to sleep, with no protection from kidnapping or abuse, yet tens of thousands of homeless people have no option but to sleep wherever they think they will be safest. The two train stations, the high courts and the university are all popular choic-

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es as they are relatively busy and brightly lit, even at night. But there is no safety here. Violence against women and child trafficking are rife. Mothers have even been known to tie their children to them while they sleep, in an effort to stop them from being taken in the night. Rukhsana and her five-year-old daughter, Shumi, lived on the streets for three years. Every night, Rukhsana would try to find the safest place possible for Shumi to sleep but she always knew that danger lurked in every shadow. Always hungry, always tired, they were in a desperate, hopeless situation. Every parent’s worst nightmare became reality for young mother Parvin (pictured) when her baby daughter, Jannati, was kidnapped. And despite hunting day and night all over the city, Parvin hasn’t seen little Jannati again. It’s utterly heartbreaking, and sadly it’s a common occurrence in Dhaka.

Here to help We’re sure you’ll agree that no child’s bed should be a pavement. And no mother should experience the nightmare of her child being kidnapped while they sleep. There are thousands of children on the streets, and thousands of mothers in the same predicament – but there is help in the form of Concern’s centres and shelters. With help from partners, Concern runs 12 homeless centres in Dhaka and nearby Chittagong. The centres are all intensely busy, with some used by as many as 260 people every month, and 50 or so staying each night. Once they are safe, families in the centres

can do things we all take for granted, such as clean their clothes and cook a hot meal. And at the end of the day they can sleep on mattresses, rather than the cold, hard ground. You can almost feel the women’s relief at having somewhere safe to take their children. The centres can only offer basic services, but many of these families have lived for months – if not years – without them. The homeless centres are truly life-saving for people with nowhere else to turn. But they can also help restore some hope where it has been lost. Rukhsana and little Shumi found help and shelter in a Concern centre, and this has led on to other things, including work. She said, “Now I can focus on my

09/02/2017 09:51

Parvin Akhtar. Photo by: Abbie Trayler Smith, Bangladesh, 2016

PARTNER CONTENT

child’s wellbeing and work towards a better future. Most importantly, I have hope in my life. The homeless centre has taught me how to dream again.”

Can you help? The enormous generosity of kind supporters is crucial if we’re to keep our vital homeless centres open through the day and night. This spring, please think of those desperate, frightened mothers doing everything they can to keep their children from harm, and send a gift to help give them a safe place to sleep. Can you help support Concern’s homeless centres –where families can escape the danger of the streets, and find a safe place to sleep?

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RUKHSANA AND SHUMI Rukhsana and Shumi lived on the streets for three years. With no work, and nowhere to live, Rukhsana faced a struggle to survive and the daily threat of abuse and violence. It was a desperate, hopeless situation. The homeless centres run by Concern offer families the chance to sleep in safety and comfort, rather than the cold, hard streets. They are a lifeline to families who have nowhere else to turn. Photo: Sadia Hossain, Bangladesh, 2016 for more information or to donate visit www.concern.net or tel: 1850 410 510

09/02/2017 09:51

The must-have recipe app for your baby & toddler New & updated with over 250 delicious recipes, Annabel Karmelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Baby & Toddler Recipe App is the ultimate kitchen essential.

annabelkarmel.com Untitled-5 1

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67 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

FAILSAFE

FAVOURITES

Sometimes all kids want is spag bol, chicken nuggets or pizza. Tempt your tots with these delicious healthier homemade versions of kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; favourites to fill happy tummies and give them all of the nutrition they need.

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S ee O v er CHICKEN AND APPLE BALLS

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68 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

F rom p ag e 6 7 Chicken and Apple Balls Preparation: 5 minutes Cook: 10 minutes Makes: 20 chicken balls ✹ 250g chicken breast, cut into chunks ✹ 250g boneless chicken thighs, cut into chunks ✹ 1 large Granny Smith apple, peeled and grated ✹ 1 onion, finely chopped ✹ 1 tbsp chopped fresh parsley ✹ 1 tbsp fresh thyme or sage, chopped, or a pinch of mixed dried herbs ✹ 1 egg yolk ✹ 1 low-salt chicken stock cube, crumbled (for babies over 1 year) ✹ 50g fresh white breadcrumbs ✹ Salt and freshly ground pepper (for babies over 1 year) ✹ Plain flour for coating ✹ Vegetable oil for frying

Put the chicken in a food processor and pulse for a few seconds. Using your hands, squeeze out a little excess liquid from the grated apple. Mix the apple with the chicken, onion, herbs, egg yolk, stock cube (if using) and breadcrumbs and roughly chop in a food processor for a few seconds. Season with a little salt and pepper (if using). With your hands, form into about 20 balls, roll in flour and fry in shallow oil for about 5 minutes until lightly golden and cooked through.

PUFF PASTRY PIZZAS

Mini Turkey Burgers

Puff Pastry Pizzas

Preparation: 10 minutes Cook: 16-20 minutes Makes: 15 mini burgers

Preparation: 25 minutes Cook: 15 minutes Makes: 6 pizzas

✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹

MINI TURKEY BURGERS

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½ onion, peeled and chopped ½ desert apple, peeled and grated 1 tbsp chopped fresh thyme 250g minced turkey 75g white breadcrumbs 40g Cheddar cheese, grated 2 tbsp tomato ketchup A few drops of Worcestershire sauce Olive oil, for drizzling

Pre heat the oven to 200°C/400°F/ Gas 6. Put the onion, apple and thyme into a food processor and whiz until everything is finely chopped. Add the reaming ingredients and whiz again until they are all combined. With damp hands, shape the mixture into 15 mini burgers. Place the burgers on a baking sheet lined with non-stick paper and drizzle over a little oil. Bake in the oven for 8-10 minutes, then turn over and cook for another 8-10 minutes until golden and cooked through.

✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹ ✹

1 x 375g packet ready rolled puff pastry 2 tbsp red pesto 2 tbsp passata 2 tbsp sweetcorn 2 tbsp fresh basil, chopped 100g cherry tomatoes, sliced 100g Mozzarella, sliced 50g Cheddar cheese, grated

Pre heat the oven to 220°C/425°F. Line a baking sheet with non-stick paper. Roll out the pastry on a board so it is around 2mm thick. Cut out 6 rounds using a 120cm round cutter. Arrange on the lined baking sheet. Prick the bases with a fork. Mix the passata and pesto together and spread over the bases leaving a border around the edges. Top with sweetcorn, basil and tomatoes and sprinkle over the cheeses. Bake for about 15 to 20 minutes on a lined baking sheet until golden brown and crisp. Remove from the oven and serve.

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69 ANNABEL KARMEL RECIPES

HIDDEN VEG BOLOGNESE

Hidden Veg Bolognese Preparation: 10 minutes Cook: 50-55 minutes Makes: 8 portions ✹ 2 tbsp olive oil ✹ 1 small onion, peeled and finely chopped ✹ 1 small leek, thinly sliced ✹ ½ stick celery, chopped ✹ ¼ small red pepper, deseeded and chopped 1 small carrot, peeled and grated ½ dessert apple, peeled, cored and grated 1 garlic clove, crushed 400g tinned chopped tomatoes 450g minced beef 4 tablespoons tomato purée 2 tablespoons tomato 250ml beef stock ¼ tsp dried oregano

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Heat the oil in a large frying pan and sauté the vegetables, apple and garlic for 10 minutes, until softened. Transfer to a blender and add the tinned tomatoes, then whiz until smooth. Wipe out the frying pan with a sheet of kitchen paper, then add the mince and fry over a medium-high heat until browned, breaking up the mince with a wooden spoon. Add the tomato and vegetable sauce to the frying pan with the mince, and stir in the tomato purée, stock and oregano. Bring to a simmer and cook for 40–45 minutes, until the sauce is thickened. Serve with spaghetti.

For lots more food inspiration, discover a world of recipes at annabelkarmel.com. Plus, join the AKClub for exclusive recipes and ideas, top competitions and unmissable offers.

08/02/2017 15:30

70 RELATIONSHIPS

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08/02/2017 16:08

71 RELATIONSHIPS

If you are not ready to go out following a new addition to your family, date night at home is a perfectly acceptable alternative. GWEN LOUGHMAN discovers how going out is the new staying in when baby comes along.

o quote a very wise and anonymous presence on social media: Date nights are good for the soul and your relationship – but only if you’re able for them. Date night before and after the arrival of children are two very different realities. When you were flying solo, chances are you took your time getting ready, curling tong in hand, and usually with a glass of wine. As for the date itself? Well, the world was your oyster, wasn’t it? An impromptu visit to the pub after work. Maybe a trip to the cinema. How about an early bird? It wasn’t unusual to manage all three. So easy. So enjoyable. So possible. Fast forward a decade or so with perhaps more than one addition to the family and thoughts of date night at the end of a long week is a different concept altogether. More like slippers and a Netflix binge on the couch. Alone. Factors such as tiredness and a shortage of babysitters were cited as just some of the reasons why many parents do not go out as much as they once would have. It might also come as no small surprise to hear the results of a study carried out by Dr. Julie Wray of Salford University, which concluded that it can take up to a year for women to recover from giving birth and not six weeks as was previously thought. Not forget-

agreement and says raging hormones, lack of sleep and a shift in the dynamic of how things used to be can fuel tensions. “It’s not uncommon for couples to struggle following the arrival of a baby. It helps to realise these feelings are normal but that with a little effort it is possible to keep your relationship close.”

Us time It’s not easy to capture some “we” time after children, however, and little ones are not known for being sensitive to their parent’s need to have a little lie on the morning after. So it’s no wonder date nights at home are becoming the new going out, with parenting couples opting instead for a take-out meal and a glass of wine at their own kitchen table. This is exactly what Lisa and her partner choose to do. With both of them working opposite shifts, Lisa says it’s a treat to go to bed at the same time on her nights off. “We don’t call it date night. It’s just an unwritten Monday night rule. We get to sit and laugh together with neither of us having to rush off. It’s peaceful.” Colleen follows a similar ceremony. “The main part is candles at dinner. It sounds cheesy but they’re like a symbol for us. It makes it different to normal family meals at the table. It’s something we used to do all the time before parenthood. Simple but effective for us.”

“Date nights at home are becoming the new going out, with parenting couples opting instead for a take-out meal and a glass of wine at their own kitchen table.” ting the very real likelihood that perhaps a new mum might not want to go out and leave her baby behind. Even if the designated baby sitter is Mary Poppins cloned with Supernanny. Loretta Kennedy, mum to three daughters, is a Cuidiú Parent to Parent supporter and birth doula. She feels the fourth trimester is about spending time with your baby and both of you getting to know one another. “Nothing can really prepare you for the changes in your postpartum body and what’s normal for one person could be off the charts abnormal for another. The idea of getting back to normal can feel very pressurising when people have an expectation that you will and can just resume where you left off before you gave birth.” Counsellor and psychotherapist Caroline Bale (www.carolinebalepsychotherapy.ie) is in

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ACCORD, the well-known and respected marriage agency with over 50 years of experience in relationship counselling, says, “taking the time to communicate your feelings and thoughts builds understanding, trust and a stronger bond between two people.” Never has this been more important for a couple following the arrival of their family. Counsellor Caroline Bale explains further: “Each parent needs “me” time to recharge as individuals and “we” time to keep attuned to each other as a couple. Setting out to prioritise your relationship as a couple at this crucial stage can have lasting positive effects on your relationship. It sets the tone for what is to come.” Caroline acknowledges that it’s not easy but is of the opinion that “we” time needs to be

booked ahead of time. “It’s not about having to dress up and do something exciting. You may both be too tired in the early days for this. It’s about making your connection a priority and assuring each other you still matter to each other.” For Ciara and her partner, their big event date night is the cinema. “But our more regular date night is to send the big kids to friends or grandparents leaving us to enjoy a couple of beers, takeaway and a movie. With the baby monitor of course.” Lily-Ann says she and her partner both look forward to date night but it’s not without its fails. “When you get a random wake-up and go to resettle only to get projectile vomited on. That one will ruin the mood for sure. Or when you realise that you threw out the corkscrew with a lot of rubbish from a house move and you end up checking YouTube for alternative ways to open a bottle of wine. By the way, that shoe thing doesn’t work!” From a dad’s perspective, Chris believes that date night is important because it allows you to reconnect. “You’re worried that you are losing your partner, your friend. She is tied up in this new role as a mother. It’s easier for men to separate out the role of fatherhood because biologically and functionally they are not the primary caregiver.” Caroline Bale backs this up. “It’s important to acknowledge that although things have changed, each of you still have needs that can be accommodated. It is easy for one parent to become so engrossed in the baby – a perfectly normal and healthy thing – that their partner might feel somewhat left out. It doesn’t sound very romantic, scheduling in time for a movie or sex, but it is too important to leave to chance. When you first met, you probably prioritised having time to spend alone with each other so why not do it now? When you know you are both making the effort for each other it becomes something you both look forward to, something you can count on at the end of a busy day or week.” Days with a young family might be long but the years are short. In the blink of an eye life will come full circle again. A wise person who has been round the parenting block more than once had an important question for us: “When your kids leave the nest, will you find yourself with a stranger or your husband? You need to make the time together, not find it.” Personally, I like the idea of making it to the other side as a team with a crew member who has weathered all of the storms with me.

08/02/2017 16:08

72 PARENTING TRENDS

CHANGING

TIMES

The more things change, the more they stay the same... or so the saying goes. But is this true when it comes to being a mum? Has our experience of mothering changed all that much from our own mum’s and grandmother’s times? ANN MARIE O’DOHERTY investigates.

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08/02/2017 15:40

73 PARENTING TRENDS

y mother had her first child in 1977 and I welcomed my daughter (her first grandchild) in 2014. During that span of nearly 40 years Ireland has undergone significant social and economic changes. Being a mother, and what it means to be a mother, has evolved too. We face different issues and there are now whole new perspectives on parenting that challenge how previous generations raised their children. In particular, the advent of the internet and smart phone technology has influenced our lives immeasurably. I spoke with several Irish women, from different generations, to find out how the face of Irish motherhood has changed over the past few decades.

To work or not to work In 1970s Ireland, culturally, it was still the norm to leave work once children arrived. Mothers were not expected to remain in the workforce. Today, however, it is a source of hot debate; do you take a career break or do you go back to work? In reality, we all know that every mother works, whether at home or in the workplace, and each choice comes with its own rewards and drawbacks. Yet today this question is more loaded with strong opinions held on either side. There is the fact too that work is sometimes less a matter of choice and more of a necessity with rising mortgage rates and a high cost of living. Conversely, rising childcare costs can prevent some women returning to work. With 30 being the average age of a first-time mum in Ireland, mothers today often spend a large part of their adult lives working. Maternity leave and then a career break to mind those children can be a huge adjustment both professionally and personally. There’s a fear that you will lose your sense of self amongst the nappies and baby talk. Sophie, who took a career break to mind her two boys, now aged three years old and eight months old, feels that this is true: “I do feel a loss of identity. Our careers seem to define us until suddenly you take on a totally different role and it’s a struggle to find yourself again amongst all the chaos of parenting.” Part-time work can, for some, provide the ideal solution, allowing for a greater home/career balance. Caroline (mother of three; aged 11, 14 & 17) felt that working “made me a better mum by having that time apart” from her children. My own mother felt work allowed her a “break from the household routine”. She enjoyed the opportunity to converse with other adults and so it really was the best of both worlds for her.

The pursuit of perfection A number of the women I spoke with, regardless of generation, spoke of the pressure

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to be the ‘perfect’ mother, putting a lot of pressure on themselves. Becky (mother to a one-year-old boy) says: “I think I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect and do everything perfectly.” Yet this pressure to be the ‘perfect mother’ is not a new phenomenon. Claire, whose first daughter was born in 1975, admits she felt a lot of pressure to “get everything right.” She had no experience of babies before her first and confesses that her mother, husband and herself were all involved in that tricky first nappy change! This pressure to instinctively know ‘how to be a mum’ has not eased over the decades despite many women having little or no experience of babies when they give birth to their own.

The power of social media A huge part of the pressure we face as mothers today comes from social media and no discussion of modern motherhood can ignore its growing influence. Many of us who had our first children in the past five years or so will have turned to Dr. Google with our parenting concerns. In the pre-smartphone era mothers would have sought advice from friends or family first; for instance, Jenny, who is mum to three children, now aged seven, 13 and 16, says she would never have looked to the inter-

fidences that much easier. The internet must be used carefully but for many mothers working in the home it is a great social outlet.

The generation game Advice handed down from generation to generation used to be part of the tradition of motherhood. Yet, today, with the growing number of books on parenting, parenting blogs and other online resources, mothers don’t always seek advice from their own mother/motherin-law. There is also the reality that parenting itself changes from decade to decade. Claire, grandmother of two, says “I think that parents [today] are less strict . Maybe our generation were too strict...without even questioning why. ‘Spare the rod and spoil the child’ was often heard.” Meanwhile, some of the women I spoke with felt the advice they were given was outdated. As Sophie noted: “The challenges of parenting have changed a lot in recent years and I find we’re on different pages when it comes to raising children.” She is not alone in this and it can be hard trying to explain that times have changed when well-intentioned advice is offered. Are things easier for mothers today? Jenny believes no, that mothers today do have it tougher as many have no choice except to work to cover living costs. Claire agrees. In her time

“I do feel a loss of identity. Our careers seem to define us until suddenly you take on a totally different role and it’s a struggle to find yourself again amongst all the chaos of parenting.” net for help. Yet for many of us newer mums it is our first port of call and I think ease of access to the internet has made it that more common. True, it can provide a lot of comfort, but it can also be a real double-edged sword. Joanne (mother to two girls aged seven and two) notes that it’s great when you want advice but it is sprinkled with “too much information, or worse: sometimes contradictory information.” Joanne personally advises using the internet in conjunction with a liberal dose of “common sense, the advice of family and health professionals.” At the same time social media can be a lifeline for those at home all day. It’s not easy spending time with just small children for company and it can be very lonely. A mum of two small boys, Sophie believes that “being able to connect remotely with others who are in the same situation as you is invaluable for non-judgemental advice and support.” Parent and toddler groups are great for getting out and meeting people but sometimes the anonymity of the internet can make sharing con-

she thinks that mothers tended to make mistakes “in the privacy of their own homes.” She admits this could be isolating at times but at least any mistakes were made without fear of judgement. She feels that mothers today tend not to trust their own instincts as much especially with their first child as there is too much scope for comparison both online and in real life.

Similar experiences When I began to research this article I expected to find wide gaps in the opinions held by the various generations of women but what struck me most was the similarities. We all place huge pressure on ourselves to achieve the unattainable (perfection), we all wrestle with ‘mummy guilt’ and we all wish we had more faith in our own mothering instincts, trusting outside sources more than we do ourselves. Claire tells me that her aunt always advised that “a mother knows her own child best.” Perhaps this is something every Irish mother needs reminding of now and again.

08/02/2017 15:40

Alexander McQueen ruffle blouse, €1,095, Brown Thomas Necklace, €45, Jenny Packham @ Debenhams

TREND Mixed shape bangles, €6, Accessorize

LOOK 2

LOOK 1

Havana oversized square sunglasses, €240, Stella McCartney at Brown Thomas

Bag, €97.50, J by Jasper Conran @ Debenhams

Blush shoes, €295, LK Bennett @ Arnotts

M&I

MUM

STYLE

Innes colour-block bag, €59, Accessorize

e Main image: Dolc

bbana And Ga

Ruffles ruled the runway this spring/summer – and luckily this is a look that can be either subtle or in your face. Bag yourself extra fashion points by incorporating ruffles into another SS17 trend like pink or florals. Jet short drop earrings, €8, Accessorize

Pink frill biker jacket, €60, River Island

LOOK 3

Top, €80, Studio by Preen @ Debenhams

Shoes, €39.99, H&M

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LOOK 4

Brown tortoiseshell sunglasses, €13, River Island

Pinstripe trousers, €34, V by Very @ Littlewoods Ireland

Ruby cocoa pod lago ring, €105, Juvi Designs

Long floral dress, €18, Penneys

Pink metallic shoes, €105, Dune @ Arnotts

09/02/2017 14:49

75 CAREER ADVICE

CLAIM BACK YOUR

CONFIDENCE Your maternity leave is just about all spent, and the prospect of heading back to work looms large. Career coach SUSAN KEALY has four tops tips to make sure you get that work/life balance right from Day One.

here’s no doubt that having children changes your life completely – and that can include your work and career. While some mothers look forward to returning to work, for others it can be tinged with utter dread. The heartache and fear of leaving your precious baby along with concerns about sleeplessness, childcare and breastfeeding, can leave mums wishing they could win the Lotto rather than head back into work – even if they usually enjoy their jobs. With this in mind, it’s not surprising that recent research by Recruit Ireland found that for 77 per cent of women, the reasons for returning to work are purely financial. Taking time out to become a mother can also give you the chance to re-evaluate your working situation. If you decide to return, you may feel that you need more flexibility, or you might want to try your hand at something altogether different. But with the new stressors and priorities of motherhood, mustering up the energy needed to make yet another change can seem out of reach. So, how do you find balance without destabilising yourself?

Have the neck to negotiate A recent survey from The Working Mother Report found that 68 per cent of women with flexible work structures were satisfied with their career prospects, versus only 42 per cent of women without them. Many women worry that beginning the conversation about flexibility may make them seem less desirable to an employer and therefore have a negative effect on their career. But many companies are finally waking up to the need to accommodate mothers in order to hold on to and attract this intensely valuable candidate pool. Morgan Stanley recently launched their Return to Work Programme for exactly this purpose. There is also a dedicated

MI Spring 2017_Career Coach.indd 75

jobs search company for flexible jobs – Careers for Mums (www.careersformums.ie) is an Irish company that connects mothers with flexible jobs, and includes on their books well-known companies such as Jurys Inn, Deloitte and Northern Trust.

Plan your productivity There’s no escaping it, a successful job hunt takes time. And when time is scarce, planning is key. It’s essential that you schedule time for yourself each day to focus on your job search, even if you have to be flexible about when this happens. Set out a rough planning guide that allows you to chunk similar activities together and make sure you have to-do lists for each day. Don’t wait for the time, make it.

Claim back your confidence Confidence often takes a big hit during time out to raise children, as many women report feeling disconnected from the professional world, and worry about bringing ‘baby brains’ back to work, or not measuring up at interview. In actual fact, though, the opposite is true. Busy mothers are some of the most efficient people on the planet, and efficiency is just one skill you may bring to the table. Parents also specialise in project management, multitasking, stress-management, negotiation, empathic interaction and conflict resolution; and there’s no reason why these shouldn’t be valued by prospective employers. At interview, make the case. Recognise your achievements. Have your own back.

Acknowledge your authenticity The Recruit Ireland study found that 36 per cent of mums reported less ambition after giving birth, as priorities shift from the workplace to the home. It’s also true that for many mothers, the stakes have now changed: if they’re going to leave their children, they want to it

be for a job they love. Similarly, not all jobs necessarily lend themselves easily to the new identities we form as mothers. This leads many women to rethink their situation: What roles could my skills be transferred to? What do I care about? How do I rebrand myself for a new field? There are a number of resources out there, such as Career Craft, Solas and FindaCoach.ie, which can help you pinpoint what you want to do and even provide you with the skills needed. The labour market is increasingly fluid and characterised by dynamic career changers – there is no better time to find something that’s right for you.

ABOUT SUSAN KEALY... Susan Kealy is the head of Career Craft, which offers free blogs and guidance to people looking to find their perfect job and career, including a 28-day challenge to get organised and find your perfect role. Career Craft will soon be launching an app to match users with ideal careers.

09/02/2017 14:59

76 STORE DIRECTORY

Image: Seraphine

STORE DIRECTORY

Accessorize Stores nationwide; www.accessorize.com Arnotts Henry Street, Dublin 1; www.arnotts.ie ASOS www.asos.com

Boots Stores nationwide; www.boots.ie Brown Thomas www.brownthomas.com

Cos 6-8 Wicklow St, Dublin 2; www.cosstores.com Childrensalon www.childrensalon.com Claire’s Stores nationwide; www.claires.com

Debenhams Stores nationwide; www.debenhams.ie Dorothy Perkins Stores nationwide; www.dorothyperkins.com Dune London Stores nationwide; www.dunelondon.com

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E G H

Enibas Stocked in Kilkenny Stores nationwide Gerry Weber Stockists nationwide; www.house-of-gerryweber

Harvey Nichols 16 Sandyford Road, Dublin 16; www.harveynichols.com Hatley Stockists nationwide; www.hatley.com Heatons Stores nationwide; www.heatonsstores.com H&M Stores nationwide; www.hm.com

I J

Isabella Oliver www.isabellaoliver.com

JoJo Maman Bébé www.jojomamanbebe.ie Juvi Designs www.juvidesigns.com

Littlewoods Ireland www.littlewoods.ie L’Oréal Stockists nationwide; www.loreal.com

Marks & Spencer Stores nationwide; www. marksandspencer.ie Miss Selfridge Stores nationwide; www.missselfridge. com Monsoon Stores nationwide; www.monsoon.co.uk Mothercare Stores nationwide; www.mothercare.ie

Name it Stores nationwide; www.nameit.com Natural Baby Shower www.naturalbabyshower. co.uk New Look Stores nationwide; www.newlook.com Next Stores nationwide; www.nextdirectory.ie

Penneys Stores nationwide; www.primark co.uk Phase Eight Stockists nationwide; www.phase-eight. com/eu Polarn O’Pyret www.polarnopyret.co.uk

River Island Stores nationwide; www.riverisland.com

S T Z

Seraphine www.seraphine.com Topshop Stores nationwide; www.topshop.com Zara Stores nationwide; www.zara.com/ie

09/02/2017 14:45

77 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

It might sometimes feel that winter is going to last forever, but the days are slowly but surely getting longer. For now, however, we have to contend with changeable weather, freak storms and random cold snaps – it’s no wonder that spring is usually a terrible time for bugs and sickness. Our team of experts are here to help, however, and this issue we welcome two new experts to our panel: Cathy Monaghan, a senior paediatric dietitian, and Lyndsey McTavish, a dentist based in Swords, Co Dublin, who specialises in treating children’s teeth. Also in this issue we focus on chickenpox, a rite of passage for many kids but can be unexpectedly severe for others.

Got a question or need some expert advice in a hurry? Our website, www.maternityandinfant.ie, is packed full of great features and advice, while our community of mums and experts are available 24/7 through our Facebook page (www.facebook.com/maternityandinfant) if you have a particular question that you can’t find an answer for through our website. So get reading, get clicking and most importantly, get talking!

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09/02/2017 15:06

78 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ALL ABOUT CHICKENPOX M&I KNOWS ...

As a parent, you’re probably a bit conflicted about chickenpox – one one hand, you don’t want to wish sickness or your child, but on the other hand, you’d rather your child got a light dose when he’s young than potentially a more serious illness when he’s older. But even when your child is young, a bad dose is possible. Here’s all you need to know about the dreaded ‘pox.

What about chickenpox and pregnancy? First 20 weeks Foetal varicella syndrome is a rare condition that could affect your baby if you catch chickenpox during the first 20 weeks. The risk of it occurring in the first 12 weeks of pregnancy is less than 1 per cent. Between 13 and 20 weeks, the risk is 2 per cent. The syndrome can cause serious complications in a baby, including scarring, eye defects, shortened limbs and brain damage.

What is the chickenpox? Chickenpox is a common childhood illness that is characterised by a rash of red, itchy spots that turn into fluidfilled blisters. They then crust over to form scabs, which eventually drop off. Some children get away with just a few spots, but in others, they can affect the whole body. The spots are most likely to appear on the face, ears and scalp, under the arms, on the chest and stomach and on the arms and legs. The illness is most common in children under the age of 10; according to the HSE, it’s so common that 90 per cent of adults are immune to the condition because they’ve had it before. The period between March and May is the most common time for chickenpox outbreaks. There is a vaccination available privately; talk to your GP to see if it’s suitable for you or your children.

What are the symptoms? The most common symptoms are the red rash, but unfortunately the sufferer can have a number of symptoms even before the rash appears that can feel more like the flu coming on. These include feeling sick, a temperature of

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38ºC (100.4ºF) or over, aching and painful muscles, headache and loss of appetite. The rash starts as small, itchy red spots; after about 12-14 hours the spots develop a blister on top and become intensely itchy. After a day or two, the fluid in the blisters gets cloudy and they begin to dry out and crust over. Finally, after one to two weeks, the crusting skin will fall off naturally.

How can I treat it? Chickenpox is generally mild and requires little treatment, but there are some ways to help the symptoms. If your child is uncomfortable with a high fever, age-appropriate paracetamol can be given; avoid non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, such as ibuprofen, as there is a small risk of these causing adverse skin reactions during chickenpox. Never give aspirin, as children with chickenpox who take aspirin can develop a potentially fatal condition called Reye’s syndrome, which causes severe brain and liver damage. Talk to your GP or

pharmacist if you are unsure what is safe to give your child. To prevent dehydration, make sure your child has lots of fluids; try sugar-free ice lollies if your child has spots inside his mouth. Possibly the most horrible symptom is the itchy spots; try calamine lotion or a cooling lotion like ViraSoothe from Clonmel Healthcare. Make sure to keep your child off creche or school until all the spots have crusted over, as chickenpox is easily spread through coughing and sneezing.

After 20 weeks The risk of damage from foetal varicella syndrome falls to less than 1 per cent after 20 weeks; however, if you catch chickenpox after week 20, there is a chance that your baby may be born prematurely (before week 37).

When to get help

Around birth

Chickenpox is generally mild, but some cases can be more serious. Consult your GP if your child seems very sick with the illness or develops any abnormal symptoms such as red and painful skin around the blisters; trouble breathing or a pain in the chest; or an excessively high temperature and/or sickness. Prescription medicine or even hospitalisation may be needed.

If you are infected with chickenpox seven days before or seven days after giving birth, your newborn baby may develop a more serious type of chickenpox. In a few severe cases, this type of chickenpox can be fatal. Always see your GP if you are pregnant or have just given birth and think you may have caught chickenpox or exposed to it.

09/02/2017 15:40

79 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE FERTILITY EXPERT

ANXIETY ABOUT IVF I am about to undergo IVF with my fertility clinic and I am extremely anxious about so many things. I’ve pinpointed my questions and my clinic has answered them but I still cannot get my anxiety under control. Should I take medication or is there something else you could recommend? Firstly, please let me say that the questions and concerns that are going through your mind are all entirely normal: you are not alone in how you are feeling. In fact, anxiety, worry and stress can be extremely common

among both males and females who are in the process of having treatment in a fertility clinic; so much so that sometimes couples stop talking about it, even to each other. This is why I cannot advocate strongly enough the importance of including counselling as part of treatment for all couples and individuals. I would recommend seeing a counsellor with experience in fertility as they will be aware of what you are going through and will be able to offer insight and support accordingly. If you are in a relationship, you might consider inviting your partner to go with you. They may be feeling the same as you or in fact have no idea how you are feeling, and a fertility counselling session is a supportive environment in which to discuss all your concerns and worries.

EGG FREEZING I am 32 and not currently in a relationship. I am afraid that I will not be able to have a baby in the future if I wait too long. Should I freeze my eggs?? Egg freezing is becoming increasingly popular in Ireland and we are noticing a surge of enquiries about it from people in their early 30s, just like you. The technology behind egg freezing has improved vastly and we are seeing excellent results. In fact, at our clinic last year we had the first baby born in Ireland as a result of egg freezing. I should stress, however, that egg freezing is not a fail-safe guarantee that will allow anyone wait indefinitely to start a family. Sometimes the eggs do not survive the freezethaw process. Like with “unfrozen” eggs, sometimes they do not fertilise or develop into a suitable embryo. The risks and benefits will be explained to you in detail by whichever clinic you chose to attend. Before you make a decision,

you need to consider what the age restrictions are, both to freeze eggs and then subsequently to use them. You should also consider the three different costs that will be involved: the upfront cost of freezing, the annual storage cost, and the cost of having IVF in the end, which is how the thawed eggs are fertilised when you want to use them. For you, a good place to start would be to have a fertility assessment to give you an idea of what your fertility is like at this moment in time. A consultation would also help you to tease out the details. These measures, and taking into account the costs and other practicalities, may help you make an informed decision on whether this is right for you.

M&I KNOWS ...

Should I see my GP before trying for a baby? Unless you are on medication or have a chronic illness, there’s no need to see your GP before trying for a baby. But a pre-conception check-up can be useful, even if just to talk about lifestyle issues, existing health conditions, family medical history and your contraception choices (as it may take some time to conceive after coming off the pill) Dr Declan Keane is a senior clinical embryologist with 20 years’ experience. He is director of ReproMed fertility clinics in Kilkenny and Dublin, with a third clinic opening in Limerick this year. For more information, call Declan on (01) 685 6755 or visit www.repromed.ie

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STI screening

Cervical screening

Blood tests

If you have had unprotected sex, it’s worth testing for sexually transmitted diseases like hepatitis B, chlamydia, syphilis and HIV. Getting an STI treated before conceiving can increase your odds of a successful pregnancy.

If you’re due a smear test, have it now as it’s not recommended to have it during pregnancy. If your smear test falls due when pregnant, wait until after the birth.

Your GP may test for anemia or rubella immunity through blood tests. Depending on your genetic and medical history, your GP may also test for genetic disorders like sickle cell disease.

See p37 for more.

09/02/2017 15:40

80 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE OBSTETRICIAN

PREP FOR DADS I’m pregnant with my first baby and my partner is really stressed about his role in the labour room. Can you reassure him that he won’t be in the way and that there will be a role for him? What would you recommend dads to be to do during labour? It’s often difficult for husbands in the labour ward setting, all the emphasis is on you as the mum to be and partners can feel a bit left out. We do try to include them in what’s happening and the midwife looking after you will go to great lengths to make sure your husband is very much part of what is the biggest day of both your lives. The important thing for both of you is not to get stressed. It’s very much in both your interests to be able to relax as much as you can. It will help greatly if you can both go along to the antenatal and birth preparation classes. You will learn some relaxation techniques and he can learn how to help you. It’s very important to feel secure and well supported in labour and he can have a very important role in achieving that. The antenatal education classes will provide you with lots of useful information and will ease some of your anxieties, you will also get an opportunity to go and see the labour ward before you need it and this familiarity will also help you both. It’s natural for you both to feel anxious and stressed but good preparation and some useful familiarity will be very helpful.

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THIRD TRIMESTER ITCHES I’m six months pregnant and I’m frequently really itchy. I wake up scratching sometimes! Someone mentioned it could be a sign of a liver problem. Should I be worried?

M&I KNOWS ... Signs of labour Labour is different for every woman, and it can be difficult sometimes to know if you’re in labour or not, especially if it’s your first. There are some signs and symoptoms to look out for as your due date approaches:

Persistent lower back pain You may feel cramps in your lower back or abdomen, a little like your period is on its way.

Feeling itchy is a very common complaint and can happen both in and outside pregnancy. Mild allergies or a heat rash can cause an itch or various skin conditions can also be itchy. There are conditions that arise in pregnancy that are associated with an itch and sometimes a rash as well. It sounds like from your description, the itch is at night because it wakes you up – if so, this is probably just a heat rash at night. But you should still go along to your doctor and explain what’s happening, as there is one particular condition that’s important to know about. A simple blood test to check your liver function is all that is required to outrule it.

SPD & BIRTHING I’ve been told I have the start of SPD, and I’ve been recommended to go to a physiotherapist. But I’m worried about how this is going to affect labour. I was hoping for a natural birth but will this mean I’ll need a section? Pain in the joint between the two pubic bones during pregnancy is called SPD and is very common, it can be very painful and quite debilitating. It is caused by pregnancy hormones softening this joint and allowing some movement in a joint which is usually fixed. You are right to go and get some advice from the physiotherapist and this will help to reduce the discomfort but will not take it away completely. The only real cure is delivery and usually within a few days your symptoms will get better very quickly. You don’t need to worry about which way you deliver, this condition will not stop you delivering normally and having a normal delivery will not make it any worse. In fact, whichever way you have your baby the SPD will recover at the same rate. The physiotherapist will guide you on how to minimise the effects of SPD.

Broken waters Not every woman experiences a “gush” when her waters break; it may be just a trickle. Labour may not start straight away but you must contact your maternity unit to let them know what’s happened.

A “show” A brownish or blood-tinged discharge may occur that could be the mucus plug that blocks the cervix giving way.

Other symptoms Dr Sam Coulter-Smith is a consultant in obstetrics and gynaecology, former master of the Rotunda Hospital in Dublin, and a clinical professor of obstetrics and gynaecology at the Royal College of Surgeons. Visit www.rotunda.ie

Some women report an upset stomach or diarrhea; feeling emotional or moody for no reason; or insomnia shortly before labour begins.

If in doubt, always talk to your GP or medical team.

09/02/2017 15:06

81 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE PHYSIOTHERAPIST M&I KNOWS ...

FOOTACHE AFTER BIRTH My new baby is just three weeks old. In the last few weeks of pregnancy, my feet swelled up so much that it became uncomfortable to walk. The swelling has gone since the birth, but now I notice aching in my feet and it’s stopping me from getting out walking as much as I would like. Is this normal? This is not unusual and a visit to your Chartered Physiotherapist will solve this for you. There are a few things to consider with this type of pain. The alignment of your feet and legs could be putting pressure on your arches, especially if your feet are very flat. An insole or an orthotic can successfully ease that pressure to make walking comfortable again. There may also be a trapped nerve causing your pain, although this is less likely if it is in both feet and without pins and needles. Diagnosing and treating this as soon as possible is key.

IFollowing birth it’s normal to experience some symptoms, such as bleeding, tiredness and discomfort. However, it’s important to keep a close eye and seek medical help IMMEDIATELY if you experience any of the following:

Sudden & heavy blood loss Increased bleeding or heavy blood loss could be a sign of postpartum haemorrhage. It may be accompanied by signs of shock.

Severe headache

POSTNATAL EXERCISE My baby is four months old and I have been attending a high intensity workout class, for the past month that is aimed at new mums. One of the exercises is a double leg lift and it hurts my back every time I do it. The instructor tells me it’s just because my muscles are weak, but I am worried about hurting my back. Stop doing double leg lifts. Double leg lifts are challenging at any time, let alone in the months after having a baby. It should not be part of a post-natal workout, and you should attend a class where the instructors are trained to know this. The reason for your back pain is that your tummy muscles cannot counteract the weight of your legs when they are lowered, and your hip

Postnatal symptoms you should NEVER ignore

flexor muscles (which attach to the lower back) are strongly contracting instead causing you to arch your back excessively. While we’re discussing highintensity postnatal classes, please ensure that you are checked for DRAM by your GP or Chartered Physiotherapist before starting. DRAM (diastasis of the rectus abdominal muscles) is a split in the centre of your ‘six-pack’ muscle, which occurs

in approximately 30 per cent of women after having a baby. If you have DRAM, you should not be doing sit-ups or crunches, and you should be rolling when getting into and out of bed. If you have a gap of three fingers or more on testing, your Chartered Physiotherapist can work with you to close that gap through targeted, appropriate exercises.

A bad or persistant headache may be a side effect of an epidural or spinal anaesthetic, but within 72 hours of giving birth it could also be a sign of pre-ecalmpsia if it’s accompanied by blurred vision, nausea, vomiting and raised blood pressure.

Upper abdominal pain If you gave birth in the last 48 hours and are experiencing extreme tiredness, vomiting and tenderness or pain in your upper abdomen, you may have HELLP syndrome, a rare disease that affects your liver function and blood clotting.

Breathlessness or chest pain Both these symptoms could nothing, but they could also be signs of pulmonary embolism, or a blood clot in your lung. Calf pain can also indicate deep vein thombosis.

Very high fever (above 38°C) Jenny Branigan is a chartered physiotherapist and partner at Total Physio in Sandyford, Co Dublin, and sees many women during and after pregnancy, treating issues like pelvic girdle pain. She is also mum to Jamie and Holly. Jenny runs pregnancy pilates courses through Total Physio. For more information see www. totalphysio.ie These answers are not a substitute for a full assessment by your chartered physiotherapist. If you are suffering with any pain or injury, please contact your local chartered physiotherapist who specialises in treating pregnant and postnatal women. It is vital to deal promptly with these aches and pains and they will only get worse as your bump and baby get bigger and heavier.

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High fever accompanied by shivering and abdominal pain could be the sign of an infection, most commonly around your perineum, a Caesarean wound, your urinary system or your uterus.

Suicidal thoughts If you are having dark or morbid thoughts, or thinking of harming yourself, get help immediately.

09/02/2017 15:41

82 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE DIETITIAN

BIG BABIES & WEANING My fourth baby is bigger than the others were at five months. I’m wondering does that matter when deciding to introduce solids? It is best to look at each baby individually and not judge introducing solids based on size alone. In Ireland we recommend introducing solids for full term babies ‘at around six months (26weeks) and never before 17weeks’ (FSAI 2011). Not every baby develops at the same rate so not all are ready at exactly the same time. We know that all babies should be on solids at six months as their stores of many of the nutrients that they were born with are depleting yet their

M&I KNOWS ... nutritional requirements are increasing. Also, 6-12 months is considered the ‘feeding window’ where we shape a child’s intake to eat the foods and flavours that we want them to eat, setting a good foundation for life. You don’t say if you are breast or bottle-feeding. If milk feeds are going well and your baby is satisfied then continue as you are. If your baby is waking more than usual over the space of a few days/week, if they are sitting up and have good head and neck control, if they are just not satisfied, you could consider introducing solids. Sometimes going back to work when your baby is 26 weeks is a consideration for parents. If you do introduce solids before 26 weeks it is best to take things slowly until they are 26 weeks.

What is the best yoghurt for babies?

There are no nutritional aims in the first week or two of weaning and you should not reduce their milk intake. It should be a relaxed and enjoyable experience for you and your baby. Let them get messy. Choose savoury flavours like vegetables before sweet flavours (fruit). Your baby was born with a sweet tooth and in weaning we are trying to help them develop a taste for more savoury flavours. After 26 weeks you can progress through different flavours and textures.

FOLIC ACID My baby is 12 weeks old, and I am considering having another child over the next year or two. When should I start taking a folic acid supplement again?

If you are planning more children, continue taking your folic acid supplement. Folic Acid is a B vitamin that is essential for the development of the foetus. It is a water-soluble vitamin, which means it is not stored in the body and so needs to be taken daily. Research has

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shown that up to 70 per cent of Neural Tube defects (NTDs) can be prevented by an adequate folic acid intake. NTDs arise at the very early stages of pregnancy – in the three to four weeks after conception, when many women don’t realise they are pregnant (FSAI 2011). Since 1993, all women of childbearing

age are advised to consume a daily folic acid supplement of 400mg/d prior to conception and for a minimum of 12 weeks after. Even if you are not planning another pregnancy right now, if you are sexually active, continue taking a folic acid supplement.

When buying a yoghurt for your family look at the ingredients list. The ingredients list is listed with the largest ingredient first and the smallest ingredient last. In general, babies should follow a no-added-sugar diet. Choose a yoghurt where sugar is not an ingredient or at the very least is near the end of the ingredients list. Always choose full fat yoghurts for baby as this helps provide the fat soluble vitamins A, D, E and K. Please be aware of the other forms of sugar such as coconut sugar, agave syrup, maple syrup etc; these are all ‘sugar’ and we aim to keep these to a minimum. A plain full-fat adult yoghurt is fine for a baby.

Cathy Monaghan has been a practicing Paediatric Dietitian for nearly 10 years. Her website, www. weaning.ie aims to teach parents about the nutritional needs of their baby, with the aim of preventing many of the common nutritional problems of childhood. Cathy runs weaning classes in Dublin; find details on Facebook/ Instagram/Twitter @weaning.ie

09/02/2017 15:07

83 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE SLEEP EXPERT M&I KNOWS ...

SPRING TIME CHANGE ADVICE

How to deal with nighttime visits!

Last year the clocks going forward really disrupted our daughter’s sleep – is there anything I can do to make this a smooth transition? This year the clocks go forward on the 26th March. I have to say that I generally don’t find this time change as punishing as the clocks going back in October and for those of you whose children wake on the early side this can be a bonus! However, it can take a few days up to a week and more for their body to adjust to a different mood lighting caused by losing an hour and the fact that our natural body clock is being challenged. I tend to encourage parents not to over-think this transition as I find as parents we have enough to contend with. Firstly, ensure that your child is well rested in the run up to this weekend. Aim for adequate naps and optimum night time sleep; then on the day of the change either: Do nothing: Slot them into the new time; adjust your clock to reflect the new time and by and follow your typical daily routine, with everything pushed ahead by one hour. This way your child will lose an hour and this will mean that bedtime is potentially a whole hour earlier than the night before and you may encounter a struggle, so respond accordingly as they process the change with the aim that within the week you are back to normal, not expecting anything to be any later or earlier than the previous week but more or less the same time structure that you have been observing.

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Waking during the night is a normal part of sleeping, but many toddlers and preschoolers haven’t learned the ability to falls straight back asleep – and so they might choose to pay you a visit! Here’s how to stop those nocturnal visits:

Put in a clock Split the difference: If you feel that this is too much of a jump then you can spilt the difference between the new time and the “old” time for the first few days with the notion of getting back to your original bedtime within a few days. Match your feeding schedule to this change. For example. If bedtime is usually 7pm, aim for 7.30pm “new time”, this in reality would be 6.30pm before the change. This way you may alleviate some of the struggle of not being sleep ready and still allowing their body to adjust with minimum upset to your daily routine. If you really find that it takes your child time to adjust to any changes then you could consider bringing timings forward from Wednesday 22nd March onwards. Adjust bedtime 15 minutes earlier on Wednesday evening and follow this through over the next few days, gradually changing nap times, meal times and of course bedtime by 15

minutes so that by Sunday you will already be on the correct clock. This way you are preparing in advance and offsetting any of the potential struggles that you may have had in the past. REMEMBER: Decide on which option suits you and your child/ren best to help with this transition Continue to pay attention to your child’s tired signals and act accordingly Ensure that the room is dark enough at both bed-time and on wake-up and also for naps You may need to use black out blinds, if you are not already Be flexible, it takes a good few days for or bodies to adjust to the change; that applies to adults as well as children Have a consistent response if they are struggling to sleep and avoid ingraining habits that you may need to address in the future.

Lucy is a paediatric sleep consultant and mum of four. She runs a private sleep consulting practice where she provides knowledge, expertise and valuable support to families across the country. Visit www.sleepmatters.ie.

A Gro Clock or a normal clock with a marker on it can tell your toddler when it’s okay to leave the bedroom. Let her then into your bed for snuggle time. This will give her the closeness she wants (and you want!) without the bad habit.

Lose the soother If your child needs a comforter, soother or favourite toy to fall asleep, consider phasing it out. If she wakes in the middle of the night and can’t find it, it’s guaranteed that she will find it hard to sleep and will go looking for you.

Be strict When you’re tired, it’s tempting to let your little one crawl into bed beside you – but soon it becomes a habit. You need to grit your teeth and bring your child back to her own room and tuck her in with a kiss. Repeat as necessary. If you want to bend the rules in time of sickness, consider camping out in their bedroom instead of introducing the habit.

09/02/2017 15:07

84 EXPERT HEALTH ADVICE

ASK THE DENTIST

FIRST DENTAL VISIT How old should a child be when he first goes to the dentist? How often should he visit and what can we expect? Opinions vary on the recommended age for a first dental check-up. Within my own practice, I recommend parents bring their child along for their first visit before the age of three. Before this I also encourage parents to bring their child along when having their own routine check-ups. This helps to normalise the experience and lets me have a quick look. A first dental visit should be fun. Tell the child that

they will get a ride in the magic chair and that they will have their teeth counted. Bringing a favourite soft toy along can be very helpful. I often examine a teddy or doll’s mouth first before I look at the child’s. Seeing what will happen beforehand can help the child understand what is involved. Sitting on a parent’s knee can also help relax them. It is important to be as positive as you can in advance of the visit. There are several books about visiting the dentist that can also be helpful. We have copies of ‘Topsy and Tim Go to the Dentist’ in the waiting room. I am happy to see most children once a year for a check-up unless there is a specific problem or issue which I would like to review sooner.

CLEANING FIRST TEETH My six-month-old baby has just got his first tooth! How do I look after the first teeth? Your baby’s first tooth is an exciting milestone for both you and your child. When the first tooth appears you should start tooth brushing as soon as possible. Use a small headed soft toothbrush, which is specifically made for babies. Mains water supply in Ireland is fluoridated, so just putting water on the toothbrush is enough until your child is two years old. Your baby may find the sensation strange at first, but will soon get used

to it. Try to make it fun. It’s often easier to clean your baby’s teeth if you are behind them. Good positions to brush your baby’s teeth include on your knee or in a baby chair/ highchair. Bath time is often a good time to introduce tooth-brushing for the first time. You also need to think about a healthy diet. Drinks and snacks can have a particularly high impact on tooth health. Never put sweetened drinks into a baby bottle. Finally, make sure you are looking after your own teeth well. Children watch us all the time and will take their lead from us.

M&I KNOWS ...

Baby’s teething timeline Your baby’s teeth are developing even before he is born, but you can expect teething to begin at about four or five months. After that, you can expect his teeth to follow this rough order (but remember it’s common to “cross-cut” cutting teeth in a different order):

Six months: First teeth appear, usually bottom central incisors, Seven/eight months: Upper middle incisors appear Nine-16 months: Upper lateral incisors start showing, 14 months: First molars appear on both the bottom and the top 18 months: The sharp canine teeth show through, 26 months: The back second molars appear; usually the bottom and then the top By the age of two of three: Your child should have a full set of 20 primary teeth.

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Dr Lyndsey McTavish is a general dental practitioner at Swords Dental in Co Dublin. She has a special interest in treating children and anxious patients. Lyndsey is a mum of three. For more information visit www.swordsdental.ie.

09/02/2017 15:07

85 PROFESSIONAL HELP

Support & Advice Need some expert help and advice? Our directory of useful contacts will make sure you locate the right resource.

CHILDBIRTH, BREASTFEEDING & NEW MUM SUPPORT

Childminding Ireland,

HSE, Oak House, Millennium Park,

Email: info@childminding.ie

Naas, Co. Kildare. Tel: (045) 880400

Web: www.childminding.ie

9 Bullford Business Campus, Kilcoole, Co. Wicklow. Tel: (01) 287 8466

LONE PARENTS

Miscarriage Association of Ireland,

Doras Buí – A Parents Alone Resource Centre ,

Carmichael Centre, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Bunratty Drive, Coolock, Dublin 17. Tel: (01) 848 4811

Tel: (01) 873 5702

Email: info@dorasbui.ie

LoCall: 1850 24 1850 Email: infoline1@hse.ie

Early Childhood Ireland,

Web: www.hse.ie

Hainault House, Belgard Square,

Web: www.dorasbui.ie

Tallaght, Dublin 24.

One Family, Cherish House,

Cuidiú – Irish Childbirth Trust,

Tel: (01) 405 7100

2 Lower Pembroke Street,

Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7.

Email: info@ earlychildhoodireland.ie

Dublin 2. Tel: 01 662 9212

Tel: (01) 872 4501

Web: www.earlychildhoodireland.ie

Email: info@onefamily.ie

Web: www.cuidiu-ict.ie Home Birth Association of Ireland,

LoCall Info Line: 1890 662 212 Web: www.onefamily.ie

DEPRESSION AND MENTAL HEALTH

Tel: 087 164 0847, (0906) 405267

Treoir 14 Gandon House,

Email: info@miscarriage.ie Web: www.miscarriage.ie

MULTIPLE BIRTHS Irish Multiple Births Association, Carmichael Centre, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7. Tel: (01) 874 9056 Email: info@imba.ie Web: www.imba.ie

SUPPORT FOR CHILDREN AND PARENTS UNDER STRESS

Email: enquiries@ homebirth.ie

Aware, 72 Lower Leeson Street,

Web: www.homebirth.ie

Dublin 2. Tel: (01) 661 7211

Custom House Square, International Financial Services Centre, IFSC, Dublin 1.

LoCall Helpline: 1890 303 302

Tel: (01) 670 0120

Email: info@aware.ie

LoCall Info Line: 1890 252 084

Web: www.aware.ie

Email: info@treoir.ie

Barnardos, Christchurch Square, Dublin 8.

Aware conducts support group meetings across the country. Manned by trained volunteers, their Depression Helpline is a listening service that operates Monday to Friday, 10am to 10pm. Aware also provide an email support service. Please visit their website for more information.

Web: www.treoir.ie

Callsave: 1850 222 300

La Leche League of Ireland, Please refer to your local telephone directory. Email: leader@ lalecheleagueireland.com Web: www.lalecheleagueireland.com Maternity Benefit Section, Department of Social Protection, McCarter’s Road, Ardarvan, Bincrana, Co Donegal. LoCall 1890 690 690 Email: maternityben@welfare.ie

Post Natal Depression Ireland,

Web: www.welfare.ie

Administration Building, Cork University Hospital, Wilton, Co. Cork.

CHILDCARE SERVICES

Support Line: (021) 492 2083

The Childcare Directory Ltd, 98 Foxrock Avenue, Foxrock, Dublin 18. Tel: (01) 201 6000 Email: info@childcare.ie Web: www.childcare.ie

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(Tuesdays & Thursdays, 10am to 2pm) Email: support@pnd.ie Web: www.pnd.ie Monthly support meetings are held on the last Tuesday of every month at Cork Maternity Hospital, Wilton, Cork.

Tel: (01) 453 0355

MISCARRIAGE AND CHILD LOSS SUPPORT

Email: info@barnardos.ie

A Little Lifetime Foundation,

Childline, 24-hour Freephone

18 Orion Business Campus, Rosemount Business Park, Ballycoolin, Blanchardstown, Dublin 15. Tel: (01) 882 9030 Email: info@alittlelifetime.ie Web: www.alittlelifetime.ie First Light- Irish Sudden Death Syndrome Association, Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7. Tel: (01) 873 2711 LoCall Helpline: 1850 391 391 Email: support@firstlight.ie Web: www.firstlight.ie

Web: www.barnardos.ie

Helpline: 1800 666 666 Text: ‘TALK’ to 50101 (2pm-10pm daily) Web: www.childline.ie Parentline, Carmichael House, North Brunswick Street, Dublin 7. Tel: (01) 873 3500 LoCall: 1890 927 277 Email: info@parentline.ie Web: www.parentline.ie

08/02/2017 17:05

86 PARTNER CONTENT

HELPING FAMILIES

IN HONDURAS Trócaire is on the ground in Honduras helping families who have lost everything due to severe flooding. Local resident Miriam tells us how the floods have affected her life with her daughter Maria...

iriam and her young daughter Maria live in constant fear; they are affected by life threatening floods up to five times a year. Rising seawater has depleted much of the coastline on the peninsula in Honduras where they live. After each flood, the sea ends up closer to their home & the rest of their village, trapping them on the soggy sandbank that their home stands on, until the next storm hits. “I panic when I hear the water is coming. I feel fear for my daughter” says Miriam. Honduras is located in Central America. Apart from having one of the highest crime rates in the region, it is also the most susceptible country to humanitarian disasters such as flooding & hurricanes, which both have devastating consequences. What was once a buzzing farming community, is now a small cluster of families living day by day, clinging to what remains of their humble homes, too poor to move, with land too wet to farm on. “From the moment we know the storm is coming, we know we will lose something. We can’t eat. We can’t sleep. We’re so worried”. During a storm, the only way to safety is by boat. Safety canals, built and maintained with the support of Trócaire, lead to dry land and security.

After surviving a flood, they must begin again. Miriam & Maria must salvage whatever hasn’t been destroyed and rebuild their simple home. The other families in their community face the same struggle, day after day, year after year. With your support, Trócaire can continue to help communities in the poorest of places by providing early warning systems, classroom training for children

and construction materials to prevent flooding, amongst other vital activities. Thousands of people all over the world are affected by storms, floods, droughts, earthquakes, famine and conflict as part of their daily lives. It is the poorest of people whom these disasters affect the hardest. For the most vulnerable like Miriam & Maria, it is a question of if – not when -

they will survive the next disaster. By supporting us this Lent, you can help respond to humanitarian crises in countries where natural disaster or conflict has put people’s lives at risk. Long after the TV camera’s have gone, your donations enable us to stay and support families “before, during and after” a storm - so that they are less vulnerable to future emergencies.

VISIT US TODAY AT WWW.TROCAIRE.ORG OR CALL 1850 408 408. ALTERNATIVELY, YOU CAN PICK UP A LENT BOX FROM YOUR LOCAL SCHOOL OR PARISH.

Charity numbers: ROI Charity No: 20009601. NI Charity No: NIC103321.

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09/02/2017 09:49

WITH YOUR SUPPORT, MARIA CAN HOPE FOR A BRIGHTER FUTURE... Maria, 6, Honduras

PLEASE DONATE: www.trocaire.org Return your Trócaire box 1850 408 408 (ROI) 0800 912 1200 (NI)

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Connect with us:

Charity No: 20009601 (ROI), NIC103321 (NI) Maria José Gonzáles Campo, Honduras

09/02/2017 09:20 09:07

88 BLOG WE LOG

NO MUM IS AN

ISLAND Hi, I’m JODIE and I blog over at www.thismumbusiness.com. Here I write about how sometimes us mums are our worst critics – maybe we should be more understanding...

’ve just been spending some time with a dear friend of mine and it has really got me thinking of how as mums, we are our harshest critics. Think about what we put ourselves through at times. Being a mother is at times, one of the loneliest things in the world. When your children arrive, your life takes a back seat. You are now solely responsible for the happiness and well being of a new life and the world expects you to do so with a dazzling smile and a perfect hairdo. Congratulations on the birth of your baby! You have automatically been entered into ‘mum competition’!! You will be expected to now make your parenting decisions based on what is deemed as acceptable by other mums and your work will be judged by a panel of other mums. There are no right answers but plenty of wrong ones. Am I saying it’s wrong to judge? No. It’s human nature to judge others. Parenting is just one of those emotional subjects that everyone has their own stance on in terms of the best way to do things. Maybe as mums though we should try to understand other’s situation a little more too. Give that frazzled mum a smile as she lugs her pram laden down with shopping bags through town.

Sometimes admitting to not being OK can be the best thing in your child’s interest. It’s OK not to be OK. It’s amazing that we all experience these times and yet we struggle to reach out to other mums for fear of being judges as ‘not coping’. As alone as we may feel at 3am whilst trying to get our crying babies back to sleep there is a whole other network of other mums doing exactly the same, be them rich or poor. That time in the dead of the night can feel like the loneliest time of your life and I have to admit, I have rocked my baby in my bedroom window, tears rolling down my face, wondering how much time I would get for suffocating my husband, the resentment of his sound sleeping all too much. When I realised I’d missed the new series of The Fall, I took my knee off his windpipe with a sigh. It’s a pity we couldn’t invent our own howl (one that sleeping babies can’t hear obvs) like the dogs all had in 101 Dalmations so that mums all over the country can feel connected in the still of the night. It is in that hour that we as women are all stripped back to our primal beings. We are not fancy prams, expensive cots, wraps, bottles, breasts or pristine nurseries. We are mother. They are child. We are all equal members of the greatest club in the world.

FOLLOW JODIE’S PARENTING ADVENTURES ON

w w w . t h i s mu mb u s i nes s . com If you’re a parenting blogger, we want to hear from you! Email us at editorialdesk@ashville.com

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08/02/2017 15:36

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