Healthy Habits to Maintain Personal Wellness

BE WELL

BY THOMAS L. AUSLEY

Throughout my years of practice and in my personal life, certain habits have contributed to maintaining an environment of personal wellness.

IN THE OFFICE

Follow the Golden Rule

The golden rule, in one form or another, is a cornerstone of all major religions. We find the Christian version of the golden rule in the book of Matthew: “Whatsoever you would have others do for you, do that for them, for that is the law.” It is almost too simple.

In the book A Team of Rivals, Doris Kearns Goodwin describes Abraham Lincoln’s relationship with his Cabinet. By acting honorably, forgiving offenses, taking blame as the person in charge, and insisting on giving others credit for successes, Lincoln formed a Cabinet consisting of his biggest political rivals. This ability to put the greater good ahead of personal gain was one of Lincoln’s greatest strengths in the supreme challenge of our nation.

Perfection Is Not Required

A common adage at our firm is, “Perfection is not required.” Our paralegals, office staff, and attorneys know that if we make a mistake, we can deal with it, especially if we know about it right away. Having that freedom and that grace encourages an environment of mutual accountability which benefits everyone.

SELF-CARE

I would have been unable to practice law for over 50 years had I not recognized the importance of self-care. If you are drained mentally, physically, and emotionally, you have nothing left to give your clients or your staff, and even less to give to your family.

Mental health professionals coined the term “compassion fatigue.” Substantial research exists about this phenomenon for social workers, police, and emergency relief workers, but in the past several years, their attention finally turned to judges and attorneys, as well as court and legal staff. In an article titled “Is Compassion Fatigue an Issue for Judges?,” a judge defines compassion fatigue as “the result of vicariously becoming worn down and emotionally weary from hearing about and dealing with situations where people have been physically and emotionally injured.” Remember that lawyers are not meeting clients at their best—clients come with anxieties and will act out and be consumed with the difficulties they are facing.

Because of a lawyer’s important role in dealing with clients who are emotional and difficult, it is even more important to practice valuable self-care. It is easy to experience burnout and fatigue so pervasive that some experts refer to it as equivalent to an environmental hazard. Consciously equipping yourself with some of the following tools for self-care is imperative to help you enjoy the practice of law:

Develop Avocations

If you do not have a hobby, get one. Take up golf or tennis or running. Learn to play an instrument. Plant a garden. Collect antiques. Get a pet. Do something that has absolutely nothing to do with the law and commit yourself to participate every week, no exceptions.

Leave on Time and Leave It at the Office

When the day is over, it is over. Go home and disengage.

Getting on your laptop in the evenings at home to work on cases is not disengaging. If you commit to end the day at 5:00 or 5:30 p.m., you will be more likely to focus your energies efficiently and get the job done. Of course, there will be exceptions to this when a mediation session runs past the stated end time, or when a deadline simply must be met; however, pay attention to how often you violate this rule.

Set Realistic Expectations for Yourself and Establish Boundaries

Many attorneys are, by nature, high achievers, and some come from families of perfectionists. Some also carry an inordinate sense of a need to “save the world.” Going overboard in dedication to the practice of law, with no sense of perspective, harms not only your clients, but yourself as well. Your actions may appear to come from genuine concern for a troubled client, but deeper reflection may reveal your own need to feel needed and valued by others, or to hear the praise of others. But those “others” will not clean up the mess of your life when you do not take care of yourself. Be realistic about what you can accomplish in the available timeframe. Overextending yourself will only lead to an ultimate burnout. Maintain balance by controlling your calendar and making time for yourself. Ensure that you have friends outside of the legal profession and spend time with them.

Take Vacations

Your expertise as an attorney is fueled by creativity. As an attorney, you problem-solve, mediate, and help others arrive at conclusions that were previously unknown to them. How can you maintain this creativity without taking time away from the stresses of your occupation? No matter how poor you think you are now, your soul will be poorer without time to reflect on the journey of life.

Maintain a Healthy Sense of Humor

Without it, you will definitely take yourself and your profession too seriously. Humility is one of the most admirable qualities of a great leader. Being able to laugh at yourself and at life’s foibles helps maintain perspective and is a reminder of your own humanity. As an attorney, you have an opportunity to model those principles and to change the public’s perception of the legal profession. If you consistently practice “being well,” you can make a difference by better serving not only your clients, but also your family, your community, and yourself. AL

Thomas L. Ausley is board certified in family law and is a partner in GoransonBain Ausley family law firm in Austin. He is thankful to have been married 58 years and is blessed with four grown children and ten grandchildren.