I'm not a carer

Why would it matter if people identify as carers or not?

BY PAUL KOURY AND RAELENE WILDING

In Australia today, there are around 2.7 million people looking after a family member with a disability, medical condition, mental illness, or frailty due to age. Most do not see themselves as carers. Instead, they think of themselves as children, parents, partners, relatives or friends who are caring for someone close to them. Those with a more sensitive nature can even feel insulted at the thought of someone trying to label them as a carer.

Why would it matter if people identify as carers or not? It matters because carers have specific needs. It matters because the staggering number of people who do not see themselves as carers do not realise that as carers they can access a wide range of supports and resources. Taking on the label of carer is a proactive choice. It is about being open to the available resources. It is about being empowered to access and use the supports available to them.

CARE IN THE PAST

Before the Aged Care sector existed, people relied on their families and communities for all of their care needs. The need to care for others was an unquestioned duty and an obligation. Family households would often have multiple generations living together and caring for each other. Women took on most of this unpaid work. As good women, they were expected to care for children, the elderly, and people who were sick or disabled. This expectation was deeply embedded in their sense of self as good and moral people. They were assumed to provide care from a sense of gratitude, love and respect for their families, neighbours and friends. In the past, it would never have entered anyone’s mind to label themselves as a carer. Governments didn’t provide social support because it was assumed that there was no need. Women were expected to perform their ‘natural’ role and provide any care that was needed, with occasional contributions from some men and children in exceptional circumstances. There was no need or reason to count or categorise people as carers.

WE LIVE IN DIFFERENT TIMES

The world today, however, looks very different. We are less likely to live in extended family households. More commonly, we live in nuclear families. In fact, most people have siblings, parents and children who are living and working far from us, including interstate or overseas. Why would it matter if people identify as carers or not?

Perhaps more importantly, women can now access education and employment. While this has helped everyone to live a much more independent life, it has also created a so-called ‘care crisis’. While women now participate more often in paid work, we are not seeing an equal shift in the number of men taking on family care responsibilities. Indeed, both men and women struggle to balance paid work and care, because most workplaces don’t make it easy to maintain this balance. Employers expect their workers to be available at all times. This is not a good match with the life and work of a carer, who also needs to give care around the clock. Sometimes, it seems that a person has to decide whether to be a paid worker or to give care to their loved ones – it is difficult to be both at the same time. When we make that difficult decision to reduce our hours of paid work, or give up paid work altogether, we tell ourselves that this is so we can ‘spend more time’ with our loved ones, be a good husband or wife, be a good parent, or be a good son or daughter. We don’t tell ourselves that we are giving up paid work to become a carer.