HHAD
6 November 09
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HUA HIN AFTER DARK.COM FREE
WEEKLY
ABSENT WITHOUT LEAVE FOR THE EXPAT IN ALL OF US What’s happening, and might be happening, in and around Hua Hin
You Fat, Lazy Slobs! New study reveals shocking truths about Hua Hin foreigners’ lifestyles
hua hin, thailand Over the last few weeks, unknown to the expat population, a secret survey has been carried out on the lifestyles and health implications for expats living in the area. AWOL obtained a copy and we can now exclusively reveal the stunning findings; • An estimated 60% are alcoholics or borderline alcoholics; • Drinking alcohol is a daily activity for 90%; • 80% have minimal or no exercise every week; • The average expat spends 5 hours a day sitting at their computer; • 50% who play golf only walk to the cart and the bar; • The average age of expats is 56.7 years old, although this is 10 years younger than the last such study in 1999;
A typical Hua Hin expat? On the plus side, most expats eat reasonably healthily, with most opting for the cheeseburger rather than the Whopper or Big Mac, and a higher proportion than average take regular ‘stress relieving’ massages. The study was commissioned by an insurance company to assess whether premiums for expats
should be changed, and doctors advising the company are convinced that the dangerous combinations outlined are a severe risk. A self proclaimed expat spokesman, Mr Marvin Hank (pictured left), rubbished the study, stating ‘its not worth the paper its written on’ before ringing the bell and falling on the floor. The study is due to be published online soon at www. youvebeenspoofed.com.
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