AWOL Issue 97

Page 1

PROPERTY THAILAND

Hua Hin’s ONLY Buyer’s Broker ABSENT WITHOUT LEAVE FOR THE EXPAT IN ALL OF US What’s happening, and might be happening, in and around Hua Hin

Contact us via AWOL on: 081 649 8361 / 081 614 8728 property@awolonline.net

GET RACING FROM ONLY 400 BAHT! OPEN EVERYDAY 10.30AM - 7PM, LATE NIGHT BY APPOINTMENT www.gokarthuahin.com

Call 032 547 199 (Office) or 081 817 3000 (Mobile) Soi 2, Phetchkasem Road opposite Hua Hin Airport

In The Swing New army golf course wins expat plaudits

hua hin, thailand Opened at the start of September, the Suan Son, or Sea Pines Golf Course south of Hua Hin and on the edge of Khao Takiab, has been wowing the local expats as they have tried it out over the last two weeks. New golf courses often need time to ‘bed down’ but the almost universal response to rounds played at this course are that it is already going to give many of the other courses in the area a run for their money, particularly as the indications are that it will be cheaper than most. Although the club house is not expected to be finished until November, the course condition has been described as excellent by many of the local golfers. The only real criticism made so far has been that the sand in the bunkers round the greens is too hard. Not all the tees are available at time of writing

but are expected to be operational soon, and there have been some remarks about the standard of the caddies but these are likely to be just teething problems. Some rumours have been circulating that the Prime Minister will be coming to the official opening of the course but as yet these remain unconfirmed. Prices at the course are currently following the Golf Festival pricing of 800 baht green fee plus caddy fee (250 baht), but normal prices are expected to be in the 1500 to 2000 baht range.

Memberships will also be available and the unconfirmed prices we have obtained are 30,000 baht for one year or 100,000 baht for five. All in all it appears that the Sea Pines course will be a great addition to the already impressive collection of courses in the area, with the added bonus of being right by the sea, so may also appeal to non-golfing partners. It can only be hoped that sense does prevail on the pricing of the course and that it is also a universal price.

INSIDE AWOL Local listings English corner Horoscopes Quick Xword Classless action

17 September 10

‘CASHBACK’

Buying a Property or Business here? Up to 5% paid to ALL Buyer’s through

FREE WEEKLY


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WWW.THAIPROPERTYDIRECT.COM Property and Lifestyle Check us out THAI Security Pro BAR & RESTAURANT SOI 102

Established in Hua Hin since 2006 Take Away Free Local Delivery

Contact us on 087 917 9579 Open 4pm ‘til late Free Wi-Fi, Pool, Darts, Live Sports

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HUA HIN Now Open Get Peace of Mind 7am to Midnight at Affordable Prices

Choose from Standard Security System packages at 9,000, 19,500 or 39,000 baht or a Tailor Made System for your home. Call 081 614 8728 or email property@awolonline.net for more information all day breakfast Perfect Opportunity burgers, wings Land For Sale! hot dogs, chili 5.3 Rai only 10 min walk from Black Mountain Golf Course. air conditioning Sweeping mountain views, next to new road with 5/2 soi selekam electricity and water.

2 million baht/ rai or offers. Telephone 081 614 8728 or

email property@awolonline.net 2

The tavern

nfl live every weekend morning


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Weather, Money, Information brought to you by Local Forecast

Day Conditions Temp °C Low High Saturday Heavy thunderstorms pm; mostly cloudy 27 31 Sunday Heavy pm t-storms; shower am; cloudy 26 32 Monday Afternoon t-storms; Partly sunny 26 33 Tuesday Partly sunny; a thunderstorm in the pm 26 34 Wednesday Partly sunny;a thunderstorm in the pm 26 34 Thursday Times of clouds and sun 26 33 Friday Clouds and sun with a thunderstorm 26 33

World Forecast

Friday 17th September 2010 City Min Max Weather Amsterdam 22 23 Rain Athens 23 32 T-storms Auckland 23 32 Mist Beijing 28 34 Cloudy Berlin 25 34 T-storms Buenos Aires 25 31 T-storms Chicago 25 34 T-storms Copenhagen 25 32 T-storms Dubai 20 28 Cloudy Dublin 11 24 Fine Geneva 10 18 T-storms Helsinki 10 18 Fine Ho Chi Minh 8 15 Showers Hong Kong 17 33 Fine Islamabad 10 16 Showers Jakarta 10 13 Showers Jerusalem 5 15 Fine Jo’burg 12 19 Cloudy Karachi 18 27 Cloudy Kuala L’pur 7 16 Bright London 18 23 Rain Madrid 13 18 Rain Manila 11 19 Cloudy Mexico City 17 26 Cloudy Moscow 11 16 Cloudy New Delhi 11 21 Showers New York 15 24 Rain Oslo 18 25 T-storms Paris 16 23 Cloudy Perth 11 18 Cloudy Phnom-Penh 15 28 Fine Rio 28 39 Clear Riyadh 10 14 ?Rain Rome 26 33 ?Rain San F’cisco 20 32 ?Rain Singapore 4 13 ?Rain Stockholm 7 22 Sctd Clds Sydney 24 31 ?T-storms Tokyo 27 41 Clear Vientiane 8 14 ?Rain Yangon 23 31 ?T-storms Zurich 24 31 ?T-storms

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Exchange Rates

At Thursday 16th September 2010 (mid-market rates) Currency Value(Baht) US Dollar 30.69 Pound Sterling 47.75 Euro 39.99 Japanese Yen 35.64 Malaysian Ringgit 9.03 Singapore Dollar 22.84 Brunei Dollar 22.12 Chinese Yuan 4.51 Indonesian Rupiah 3.03 Indian Rupee 0.57 Korean Won 0.02 Australian Dollar 28.65 New Zealand Dollar 22.14 Swiss Franc 30.56 Danish Krone 5.37 Norwegian Krone 5.04 Swedish Krona 4.35 Canadian Dollar 29.71 UAE Dirham 6.73 Bahrain Dinar 55.04 Omani Rial 54.27 Qatar Riyal 6.63 AWOL makes no warranties, express or implied, regarding these rates and shall not be liable for any losses or damages incurred in connection with them.

Get the latest Weather and Exchange rates on our website

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Lin’s Cafe

‘noted for fresh air and fun’

Lin’s Cafe

Open Every Day from 7.30am Big Breakfasts - Low Price Roast Beef Dinner only 160 bt Tel: 082 2512473 Phetkasem Road, near Soi 80

Useful Numbers

Emergency Calls Police 191 Crime 195 Fire 199 Traffic Control Centre 197 Highway Police 1193 Tourist Police 1699 Tourist Service Centre 1155 Missing Persons 02 282 1815 Hua Hin Police Station 032 511 027 Cha-Am Police Station 032 471 321 Hua Hin Hospital 032 511 743 San Paulo Hospital 032 532 576 to 585 Hua Hin Red Cross 032 512 567 Other numbers Hua Hin Municipality 032 532433 Hua Hin Tessabahn 032 511 047 Hua Hin Immigration Office 032 522 656 Hua Hin Bus Terminal (non air-con) 032 511 230 (air-con) 032 511654, 032 512543 Hua Hin Railway Station 032 511 073 TAT 032 513885 Tourist Information Centre 032 512 120 Hua Hin Electricity 032 512 215 Hua Hin Water 032 511 677 TOT 032 519 000/001 TT&T 032 532 018 British Embassy Consular Correspondent: Steve Ketteringham 086 7933461 or e-mail on steve@ketteringham.com


English corner

Bobby’s British Breakfast Foods

served up by Do you wonder why we say certain things, or what they really mean? Each week we will examine a different word or phrase and tell you how UK Sausages, Ham, it came about. Bacon, Pies, Teas etc. This week it is.. Pigs might fly / When pigs fly A humourous/sarcastic remark, used to indicate the unlikeliness of some Call 087 155 7737 or 089 985 7473 event or to mock the credulity of others. For example, “I might make a start on papering the back bedroom tomorrow”. “Yes, and pigs might fly”. The original version of the succinct ‘pigs might fly’ was ‘pigs fly with their tails forward’, which is first found in a list of proverbs in the 1616 edition of John Withals’s English-Latin dictionary - A Shorte Dictionarie for Yonge Begynners: Pigs fly in the ayre with their tayles forward. This form of the expression was in use for two hundred years as a sarcastic rejoinder to any overly optimistic prediction made by the gullible, much as we now use “...and pigs might fly”. Why pigs? Other creatures were previously cited in similar phrases - ‘snails may fly’, ‘cows might fly’ etc., but it is pigs have stood the test of time as the favoured image of an animal that is particularly unsuited to flight. It is probably the bulkiness of the creatures and their habit of rooting in earth that suggests an intensely ramping nature [...and it’s nice to have an opportunity to sneak in the little-used ‘ramping’, which means no more nor less than ‘unable to fly’]. Thomas Fuller, in Gnomologia, 1732, was the first to explicitly single out the pig as a ham-fisted aeronaut: That is as likely as to see an Hog fly. The first example found of the currently used form is from The Autobiography of Jack Ketch By Charles Whitehead, 1835: Yes, pigs may fly, but they’re very unlikely birds. Flying pigs appeared in print in the UK quite often throughout the rest of the 19th century. The Illustrated Times referred to them in an issue in August 1855: “...pigs might fly. An elephant, too, might dance on the tight-rope,” Lewis Carroll also conjured one up in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, 1865: “I’ve a right to think,” said Alice sharply... “Just about as much right,” said the Duchess, “as pigs have to fly.”

Property Marketplace

If you are interested in these properties please email us on property@awolonline.net or call 081 614 8728 A modern classic right on the beach! Beachfront properties like this don’t come along too often, and this one in Sam Roi Yod also has its own private swimming pool, 24 hour security and comes tastefully fully furnished. Ref No.: HS0410202 4 Bed / 4 Bath Living: 375 sqm. Land: 1100 sqm

Sale price Was: 22 M

Now: 15.5 M A beautifully decorated and fully furnished house in Hua Hin with a sea view and a huge garden is now available at a much reduced price. Also within easy travelling distance from the Banyan Golf Club. Ref No.: HS0410196 Less than 10 min to the beach 2 Bed / 2 Bath Living: 190 sqm. Land: 1000 sqm

Sale price Was: 7.5 M

Now 5.4M!! 5

He’s

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%

O F

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C B ut A v a W o uf t li n f h 2 O y a is 3 d L o l c / u 0 n u o o r T u 9 t /1 il m av p 0 e e o a r n l n o (d f u r o t in r a k a nd s 1 n 0 % pr o t d es in is e c c n lu o t d u n at e t d )

Visit www.awolonline.net

Public House and restaurant

all day breakfast from 8.30am sunday roast available every day daily specials childrens menu draught english cider happy hour 4.30 - 6.30pm (bottled beers from 50 baht, wines and spirits at discounted prices) Luxurious suites overlooking the beach, large outside sun terrace and free WIFI

Located on the corner of Chomsin/ Naresdamri rd by the fishing pier Ample parking nearby For bookings or more information call 032 530087 or 086 603 5335

Weird News Louisiana, usa

Naked woman steals cab, falls asleep A woman who took her clothes off in a taxi cab then stole it after the cab driver drove to a police station to complain. Then she had a little nap. The incident occurred in Covington, Louisiana, at about 2am, when the woman (at that point fully clothed) asked to be taken to Michigan. The cab driver declined to take her to Michigan, probably on the

grounds that Michigan is roughly 1,200 miles away from Covington, Louisiana. This upset the woman, who responded by taking her clothes off in protest. When she refused to get out of the cab the driver drove to the nearest police station. 6

Unfortunately the driver forgot to take his keys with him when he leapt out of the car upon arriving at the station - giving the woman the perfect opportunity to steal his car from in front of him. The woman drove a few blocks, parked, and fell asleep naked in the back. The woman - identified as 29-year-old Jennifer Gille (pictured left) - was arrested and charged with exposing herself and stealing the vehicle. According to a police spokesman, Gille ‘was probably under the influence of some type of chemical.’ bangkok, thailand Thai senators fight in front of Parliament Two senators from Thailand ended up trading blows in public - but rather than a political grudge match gone violent, they were taking part in a scrap to promote Thai kickboxing, otherwise known as Muay Thai. 59-year-old Payap Tongchuen and Direk Tungfang, 64, went two rounds in front of Parliament in trunks and gloves. A boxing ring was set up especially for the event in front of the parliament building in Bangkok. Tongchuen joked: ‘It’s good that I can still stand!’ Direk added: ‘The aim is to market Thai boxing, as Muay Thai at the international level. It is also to campaign for the younger generations to maintain this traditional sport.’ The referee avoided any arguments by declaring the two politicians - both former professional boxers joint victors.


AWOL Sudoku

Terrace 90 Deli Now Open

Solutions on a platter at Terrace 90 Deli with Meats, Salads, and fine Each week we will present you with two Sudoku puzzles; an easy one Wines at “Supermarket Prices” and a hard one. Just fill in the empty squares so that each horizontal and See Ad p 15 and terrace90.com for details vertical line has all the numbers 1 to 9, as well as each section.

Puzzle 1 (Easy)

Puzzle 2 (Hard)

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PHOENIX BAR come and choose from the best and largest selection of music in town Big screen TV, Pool and Darts Make it your hideaway in Hua Hin

Puzzle 2 2

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Strictly

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Local Listings Brought to you by Get listed here and online from only 48 baht a week! Email sales@awolonline.net or call 081 649 8361

Prices: 1 year (52 issues) ฿2,500; 6 months (26 issues) ฿1500; 3 months (13 issues) ฿1000

Bars / Pubs

Page

10 032 536970, 087 599 1913 23 085 425 1185 10 089 586 1700 23 087 155 7737, 089 985 7473 21 089 046 9505, 085 930 7232 24 032 522418, 083 317 3008 17 085 383 5387, 082 244 1911 14 087 037 7731 20 086 178 1550 7 3 9 085 429 0378 086 174 6165, 089 913 7926 11 2 & 10 089 049 2141, 089 548 8003 2

British Breakfast Foods Buffalo Tavern Captain’s Fish & Chips Chameleon Hua Hin Ham & Bacon Kom Hom Lin’s Cafe Lost Cafe S & S Indian Restaurant Terrace 90 William Tell

5 6 11 13 1 2 & 15 4 10 10 7 & 15 23

Restaurants / Food

Activities / Services

AWOL Braze Head Tattoo 20 Construction Gang 18 The Dartman 22 Go Kart Hua Hin 1 Hua Hin Motorcycles 9 Observer Group 14 Refurbish Business 20 Siam Cons. Insurance 11 Thai Security Pro 2

Property

Bar For Sale Borfai House Nong Kha Land Perfect Land Property Marketplace Property Thailand thaipropertydirect.com

@ www.beeroclockclub.com bobsclobber@hotmail.co.uk bobstanley21@yahoo.com huahindick@hotmail.com gardols@netzero.net www.lolitashuahin.com aknabe@gmx.net www.playsportslounge.com kevinmilke@yahoo.co.uk lord_webb@hotmail.com www.thetavern-bkk.com

087 155 7737, 089 985 7473 032 530087, 086 603 5335

bobstanley21@yahoo.com info@buffalobillshuahin.com jim_coconuts@hotmail.com

032 513144, 086 161 9342

www.hamandbacon.co.th sadington@hotmail.com

085 291 1926 081 378 0592

087 917 9579 082 251 2473 032 511624 081 455 5298 032 516587

085 817 3642, 032 534448

081 614 8728, 081 649 8361

086 739 8645 081 614 8728

087 155 7737, 089 985 7473 032 547 199, 081 817 3000 086 2845055, 080 9993403 032 547450, 081 986 4759

081 614 8728

085 962 2232, 032 512075

081 614 8728

www.lost-cafe.com narai68@hotmail.com www.terrace90.com

www.awolonline.net brazeheadtattoo@hotmail.com property@awolonline.net bobstanley21@yahoo.com info@gokarthuahin.com soldbkk@gmail.com info@observergroup.net property@awolonline.net franckphuket@hotmail.com property@awolonline.net

18 080 991 8565 property@awolonline.net 9 081 614 8728 property@awolonline.net 20 081 614 8728 property@awolonline.net 2 081 614 8728 property@awolonline.net 5 081 649 8361 property@awolonline.net 1 Contact via property@awolonline.net 2 & 16 www.thaipropertydirect.com

Miscellaneous

Hutsadin Elephants 21 Punchline Comedy Club 19 8

&

Beer O’Clock Club Boapa’s Place Bob and Noks Bobby’s Bar Dick’s Office Dizzy Dolphin Dolphin Bar Lolitas Lucky Shot Phoenix Bar Play Sports Lounge Railway Tavern Sabai Bar The Lord Webb The Tavern

Hot Sponsor coming soon!

032 827098, 081 199 0798

032 533533

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AreaHA! HA!

555 HA!

Railway Tavern HUA HIN

PUB & CAFE

Send your jokes to submissions@awolonline.net and get your name in print! Brought to you by The Railway Tavern

SOI 88

085 429 0378

Paraprosdokians (with thanks to David) A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect. • Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. • Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. • The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list. • Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. • If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong. • We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public. • War does not determine who is right -- only who is left. • Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. • To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research. • Dolphins are so smart that after a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the edge of the pool and throw them fish. • I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted pay checks. • A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. • I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you. • A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. • You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. • Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. • A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip. • Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were. • Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with. • You’re never too old to learn something stupid. • A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it. • If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child? • Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

House For Sale

Four bedrooms/Two bathrooms on a 400 sq.m plot in small (36 houses) sought after development in Borfai. 7.5 million baht For more information please call 081 614 8728 or email property@awolonline.net

Hua Hin Motorcycles Soi 80

BIKES - BUY, SELL & RENT Scooters for rent and sale

Rents from ฿3,000 a month/ ฿200 a day; Sales from ฿ 20,000

Many scooters in stock Auto and manual Visit our shop or contact us for more info and weekly rates 086 2845055 or 080 9993403 (Thai/Eng) Email: soldbkk@gmail.com

9

Rhythm

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Visit the village - discover Khao Takiab

Bob & Noks Bar

Home of Khao Takiab Golf Society Motorbike / Car Rentals Club hire 089 586 1700

SPORTS GUESTHOUSE BAR R E S T A U R A N T

International Wines, Bottled & Draft Beers Two satellite systems showing live sports Tel 032 511624

032 536970 or 087 599 1913

Get your business on the map!

Got something to sell? Looking for a bargain?

Contact sales@awolonline.net or call 081 649 8361

Your STARS

Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 19 After becoming a routine victim of bedbugs, you’ll make history as the world’s first victim of chair-, wall-, and all-over-the-catbugs. Aquarius Jan 20 – Feb 18 It comes down to whether or not you can play an instrument or drive a car, but no, you won’t get the girl this time, either. Pisces Feb 19 – Mar 20 You’ve always said that if you were king, you’d make college free, but there won’t be time between your coronation, the palace coup, and the beheading. Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20 Your daughter’s memory will still haunt your dreams, but it’s a welcome change from all the relived failures and sweaty former scoutmasters. Taurus Apr 21 – May 21 Just when you thought it couldn’t possibly get any worse, the stars confirm that you are correct and it is pretty much as bad as possible. Gemini May 22 – June 21 You’ll take a long trip on a luxurious passenger train and meet a diverse group of travellers, all of whom will later collaborate to murder you. Cancer Jun 22 – Jul 22 Ultimately there will be nothing your friends can do for you, putting you in the position of having to find more competent friends. 10

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Indian restaurant Soi 94 Eat in or Takeaway 081 455 5298

Leo Jul 23 – Aug 22 The stars say that this week will be a time of reflective contemplation, so postpone your plans to rollerskate around naked except for the gas mask. Virgo Aug 23 – Sep 22 Just when all hope is gone, you will find a secret stash of Digestives that actually makes up for quite a lot Libra Sep 23 – Oct 23 You’re through giving advice to people, to the vast relief of the park rangers tasked with pulling their charred husks out of the volcanoes. Scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 21 You’ll lose both legs in a railroad accident next month, but luckily they’ll only be prosthetic replacements for the ones you’ll lose at the zoo this Thursday. Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 21 No one will be able to figure out your enigmatic last words, and the fact that you’ll live in silence for three more years after uttering them makes that somehow cooler.

Count

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Sabai Bar Open every day from 12 Noon‘Til Late

Relax with an ice cold beer and a friendly welcome from Noi and the girls Get updated on the Hua Hin Golf Society with Kevin Play pool with the many regulars

He

TA K E I T E A S Y AT

Find us at 5 Soi Selekam, Hua Hin - from the Hilton go north along Naresdamri Road, take the first left and then the first right, and we are 40 m along on the right

Contact us: Noi 086-174-6165 Kevin 089-913-7926 email kevinmilke@yahoo.co.uk Visit Myanmar - Play golf in the Golden Land Escorted CustomTours - Enquire within

Balloon Chasers Guide

Parties, special offers, regular events, celebrations and more; if you want it in AWOL email info@awolonline.net or contact Noi at Sabai Bar (Tel: 086 174 6165) by Wednesday noon every week. Or join the AWOL forum (www.awolonline.net/forum) and post details of events there. NEW This week and coming soon Beer O’Clock Club First Birthday Party! Saturday 18th Sept. from 7.30pm; booze, birds, band, buffet etc - All welcome Terrace 90 - Mexican Buffet every Tuesday in September (ad p 15) Regular Events Terrace 90 Every Friday / Saturday Live Music from 7pm; Every Friday 6 - 8.30pm 199 baht Buffet; Special Sunday 199 Baht Buffet 6 - 8:30pm (ad p 15) Curly’s Bar Every day Happy Hour - 1 - 6pm all beers only 50 baht per bottle plus all day English breakfasts from 95 baht (see ad p11). William Tell Restaurant - All day breakfast 99 baht (see ad p 23) Dolphin Bar - Western food 85 baht, choice of 4 dishes (see ad p 17) Dizzy Dolphin - Happy Hour between 3 and 7pm; buy three beers get one free; gin, vodka and rum mixed drinks only 55 baht Bobby’s Bar, Soi 102. Free Buffet Dinner, Monday to Friday 4 - 6pm. Friday is always Fish and Chips, other nights, full menu, ie, BBQ Chicken, Roast Beef, Pork, Irish Stew, English Bangers, all with Mash, carrots, Gravy etc. Leo Draft, glass 45 bt, English pint 65 bt, Jug 135bt or if you can handle it, a 3 litre Tower of Leo, 399 bt. Leo Draft prices are all day everyday (from open till close). British Breakfast all day, Only 99 bt. KomHom, Soi 102 4 to 6pm - Beat the Bar for cheap drinks! (ad p 18) Buffalo Tavern Happy Hour 4.30 - 6.30pm (ad p 6) White Swan Pub & Restaurant Every Friday from 7pm Farang BBQ,Ribs,Steaks,Burgers,Buffet table, all you can eat, ONLY 99 baht, After dinner Pool competition, Parties of 6 or more please reserve table call 08958 76743. On the A4 Petchkasem Rd just before Pranburi Flyover Cheap Charlie Happy Hour noon - 7pm, buy 2 get 1 free Down Town Bar, Soi Selakam Buy 2 drinks have 1 FREE at any time, every day. Headrock First Friday every month - Pub Quiz; Mondays -10am til close - 55 baht all beers/selected spirits Dick’s Office Fridays - open darts 7.30pm (ad p 21) British style Sunday Roasts available at: Lin’s Cafe, Phetkasem Road between Sois 80/78 - (ad p4); Jungle Juice, Soi Selekam (ad p 20); Dick’s Office, Soi 80 (ad p 21); Ye Olde Buffalo Tavern, Chomsin Rd (ad p 6) Scandic Bar, Cha Am, open darts evening from 7.30pm . FREE return transport from Dick’s Office departs 7pm - please call 089 745 3992 (Anne) or 089 894 4310 (Mack) 3 hrs before to book transport

SIAM CONSULTING

HUA HIN CO. LTD. EXPAT INSURANCE SOLUTIONS

Health (up to 85), Car, House, Commercial. Complete medical cover for expatriates in S. E. Asia Schenghen and other visas travel insurance specialist Soi 94, last unit on left before railway

085 962 2232 or 032 512075 franckphuket@hotmail.com CUT OUT AND KEEP! ✂

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Don’t Miss This Week

• ‘Prak’ at Cicada Market. Saturday 18th September, performance begins at 7:30 pm. A dance interpretation of the Mae Nak legendthe story of a beautiful young woman who lived by the Phra Khanong canal in Bangkok with her husband, Mak. With Nak pregnant, Mak is called off to war, and is severely injured. While he is being nursed, unknown to him both Nak and the child die during childbirth. When Mak eventually returns home, he is cast under a spell and finds his loving wife and his new child waiting for him and nothing wrong. Neighbours who try to tell Mak that he is living with her ghost meet with grisly ends. And it gets better from there. • Pichet KlunChun Dance Company presents “Chui Chai“, an original dance theatre, at Vic Hua Hin. Saturdays 18 and 25 September starting at 7:30 pm. Tickets 1000, 800, 500 baht. Students 50% off.

Upcoming

• Breaking News! Jam Party at Ray’s Place. Monday 27th September from 7pm. First of the season. Be there. • Punchline Comedy Club: Live Stand Up Comedy at Hot Property, Thursday 14th October. See ad on page 19 for details.

Ongoing

Stage Shows and Special Performances • Cicada Market and Performing Arts Fair. The Venue@Suansri. Fri/Sat evenings from sunset to 12 pm, Sundays from 4pm; Dining, shopping, art, performances, and films in a beautiful park-like setting. A wonderful place to spend an evening. • SASI Dinner Theatre. SASI Restaurant. Nightly at 7:00 pm, Dinner with Thai Contemporary theatre performance. Recommended. They have their own theatre troupe, who are quite good. • Hua Hin Magic Show, Hilton Hotel. Thur. to Sat. at 8:00 pm; A full professional magic show. Adults 400 Bt. Children 200 Bt. Tel. 083 503 0999 • Cabaret Show, Blue Angel Cabaret. Every night 8pm and 9:46pm. Midnight show on weekends. Something a little different.

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the hua hin arts guide

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Nightly Music

• Ricardo Dioso, Classical Guitar Virtuoso: Fri/ Sat/Sun. nights 7 to 10pm @The Duke’s Restaurant • Jazz 4 Dinner with the Hua Hin Ensemble: Friday and Saturday nights from 7 to 10 pm @ Rest Detail Hotel • Bossa Nova and Thai Popular Music. Every night@Thonglor Pub Soi 51 between Petchkasem and Naebkehardt Rds. • Piano Duo, Standards and Thai Songs Nightly from 8pm @Leelawadee Pub and Restaurant. Great fun, expect a crowd. • 100 Pipers Band. 100 Pipers Pub. Nightly exc Mon., starts 11 pm; High-energy Thai country and rock. • Live Jazz and Popular Music. Dusit Resort. House band play nightly in the Polo Bar, exc. Tues, starts 8pm. • Live Music at Terrace 90 Restaurant. Every Fri/ Sat Night from 7 PM - No Cover Charge. • LukNam Band, LukNam Pub. Thai Country and Rock. Nightly 10pm until very late. It rocks. • Soft, Sophisticated Jazz with Mr. Uri (guitar) and Maria (vocal). Coco 51 Restaurant. Nightly 7-10 pm; Soft vintage and contemporary jazz. These guys are good. • Popular, Country, and Oldies. Nokkachan Restaurant and Pub. Nightly from 9pm • Smoriang Band, Smoriang Pub. Thai Country and rock. Nightly 10pm. Great fun, expect a crowd. • Stoned Head Band. El Murphy’s Hotel, Irish Bar, and Restaurant. Nightly from 10pm. Classic rock with Hua Hin’s most venerable band. Classic Pop and Rock. Stone Head Tavern. Nightly from 9 pm. A talented group of Hua Hin veterans keep it swinging • Thai Acoustic Music, TauMai Restaurant. Nightly from 7pm. Tunes from talented singers and guitarists. • Thai Acoustic Music, Plearnwan Vintage Village. Fri/Sat from 8 pm. Khun Oh and Chat come down from Bangkok to regale us all. They are quite good, and often have guest artists. • Modern Thai Popular Music, Thonglor Pub. Every night, from 9 pm ‘til closing


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Venue Guide

• 100 Pipers Pub. Petchkasem Rd at soi 68. The door is about 60 metres north of the intersection. • Blue Angel Cabaret, Central Hua Hin. Located just off Soi Bintabaht. From the Hilton, go down Bintabaht and turn right at the first (no-name) street. The Blue Angel is about 50 m down on the right. • Check Cheu Club, Hua Hin south-central . Soi 86/1, next to the Grand Hotel • Coco 51 Restaurant, Hua Hin north side. Soi 51 at the beach, Hua Hin Tel 032 515597. • Dusit Resort. 1349 Petchkasem Rd. Just north of the ‘underpass’ near the airport. Tel. 032 520009. • El Murphy’s Hotel, Central Hua Hin. 25 Soi Selakam, at ‘Little 5 Points’ in the heart of the entertainment district. Tel 032 511525 • Hi4 Pub. At Hin Nam Sai Suay condominium, Petchkasem Road Soi 7. http://www.hi4pub.co.cc/ • Hilton Hotel, Central Hua Hin. Naresdamri Rd in the middle of Hua Hin’s tourist district. Tel 032 538999. • Leelawadee Pub and Restaurant, Petchakasem Soi 68/1. Hua Hin’s upscale men’s club. (Nice for ladies, too!) • Luknam Pub, Western Hua Hin. On the road to Pala U waterfall. Opposite Phoenix Bar. • Nokkachan Restaurant and Pub, Khao Takiab. Khao Takiab road corner of soi 83. Near Hyatt Regency. • Plearnwan Vintage Village, Hua Hin north side. Petchkasem Road at Soi 40. You can’t miss it. It’s a really unusual building. • The “Queen’s Garden” Park. A lovely public space on the ocean at Soi 19. • Rest Detail Hotel. Soi 19 at the beach, just North of the 19 Rai fairgrounds. 19/119 Soi Hua Hin 19. Tel: 032 547 733 http://www.restdetailhotel.com/ • Sasi Restaurant, Khao Takiab. Next door to The Venue@Suansri, on soi Khao Takiab 83. Tel 032 512488 or 081 880 4004. Web www. sasi-restaurant.com, email sasi@sasi-restaurant.com. • Smoriang Pub, South-Central Hua Hin. In the small soi that runs between San Paolo Hospital and the Grand night market. You’ll find Smoriang on the left, shortly before you hit the railroad tracks. • Stone Head Tavern. On the south east corner of Petchkasem and Chomsin Roads (at the traffic light), 2nd floor. Enter from Chomsin. • TauMai Restaurant. Petchkasem Rd on the ocean side. Two doors north of Index Living Mall. • Terrace 90 Restaurant. Soi 90 (just before Market Village when heading north on Phetkasem Road) about 250 metres up on the right. Tel. 032 516587 email terrace90@gmail.com www.terrace90.com • The Duke’s Restaurant, Hua Hin north side. Soi 51 (aka Damronrat Rd.) at the beach. Just off Naebkehardt Rd. Tel 03 251 5787. www.theduke51,com • The Venue@ Suansri, Khao Takiab. On the corner of Khao Takiab Road and ‘Soi Hyatt’ (soi 83). Tel. 080 536 606. www.cicadamarket.net. Email cicada@cicadamarket.net • Thonglor Pub. Soi 51, between Petchkasem and Naebkehardt Roads. • Vic Hua Hin Theatre and Patravadi Performing Arts Center, Nongkae (Southern Hua Hin). An astonishing complex on 30 rai of land just 5 minutes south of Hua Hin center. To get there, proceed south on Petchkasem Road past the Market Village shopping mall. Take the ‘flyover’ to Prachuab Kirikhan and Pranburi. After the flyover, pass the Centennial Park and night market on your right. The entrance is on the right, about 500 metres past the flyover. The sign at the entrance say “Patravadi High School”. The theatre itself is the large black building. Tel. 032 827815.

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DEAR MARY, I have been happily married for several years, and live with my wife on the outskirts of Hua Hin. I like to have one evening a week where I can be by myself, sometimes going out for a walk, sometimes to have a drink. If I do the latter there is a lovely little bar that I always go to which has friendly staff and a nice ambience. I tend to like a whisky and coke, but recently when I have been going there I seem to get a special glass which never empties, however hard I try - I gulp it down and almost before the glass is on the bar it is full again. Consequently I have been getting quite tipsy and have suffered some long periods of memory loss, and my wife has started accusing me of all sorts of things such as unfaithfulness. The thing is I always have a great feeling of contentment the next day after my outings, so my question is should I continue this enjoyable experience and risk losing my wife or stop and be unhappy at losing this freedom? Indecisive Ian, Hua Hin

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Relationship woes? Bar girl blues? Sexual deviant? Send your problem to Mary Ann Cotton on submissions@awolonline.net

Dear Ian, I think many men will have come to the same crossroads as you are now at, but so many of them take the wrong turn, leading to years of unhappiness and self loathing, bitterness and resentment. The decision they take at a moment such as this changes their life and whole perspective on life, love and women. I can’t stress how important this decision is, not just for you, but for your wife too. She could also be facing years of misery and constant nagging doubts as to whether she has been fair on you, and whether she forced you into the wrong decision. Only you can make the decision, and you have to make it for the right reasons. Ultimately the choice can be simplified in one of two ways; do you sacrifice years of happiness at the risk of your peace of mind, or do you tell your wife where to get off? I think the choice is obvious!


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Mexican Buffet every Tuesday in September 199 Baht with 79 Baht Frozen and 99 Baht Hand Shaken Margaritas 199 Buffet every Friday; International Food (see www.terrace90.com for details) Full Bakery - Breakfast All Day - Kids Menu (starts at 59 Baht) - Full Thai Menu Mexican - Pasta - Lamb Chops - Steaks - BBQ Ribs Deli Now Open! Daily Lunch Deals with Fresh Potato Salad, Cole Slaw, Hamburger Patties, Streaky Bacon, Back Bacon, Fresh Meats and Fine Wines at Supermarket Prices. Bottled Beer from 45 Baht All Day!

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THAIPROPERTYDIRECT.COM

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The best place to satisfy all your property needs and more

Business

General

Bar for sale 4 bedrooms, pool table, two tv’s plus projector. Large bar and kitchen with a large store room, satellite and cable. Totally refurbished in 2009, 4 years left on the lease. Located on Soi Selakam, Offers around 600k. Contact: 0885423129 Parklife for Sale or Partnership. Pranburi Parklife ( www.pranburiparklife.com ) is a multi activity centre and bar just 1.5 klms from Dolphin Bay Sam Roi Yod. Situated on 4 rai of leased land, it consists of a fishing pond, 16 hole crazy golf course, Petanque pitch, giant chequers board, and massage centre. 6 years remaining on an extremely attractive lease with option to extend. Additional space (approx 2 rai) for further development, ideal for cheap bungalows or restaurant. Only genuine interested parties need reply Jon jdinindo@gmail.com Motor rental business Complete business renting motorbikes and scooters 4 x Honda Shadow Classic 2004-2009 4 x brand new Honda Click Website Very easy business to run good profitability for more info email or call Give me an offer and you have a good business poker45@live.se. massive reduction; BAR for sale in Soi Selekam. Pool table, 2 TVs. Great location and potential. 3 rooms upstairs. Only 1.2 Million baht. Phone 084 314 7188. bar for sale, Soi Sarawat 80. consisting of 2 floors,1st floor has bar, pool table, ubc tv, bathroom and a small bedroom,2nd floor big room could make 3 rooms,bathroom and kitchen.just over 7yrs on lease no key money,rent 12,100 pm,increase 10%per year. some repairs to bar floor needed and a paint job hence reduced from 850,000 to 800,000.for more details e mail: eastern_scotsman@hotmail.com Restaurant / Poolbar for Sale. New restaurant and bar in Soi 94 for sale. Nice terrace, new pool table inside, flatscreen tv with UBC, stereo. Big kitchen with all appliances available. Inclusive bar table, chairs etc. 2 enormous bedrooms upstairs (2 floors), 14 meter garden in the back. Proven record business. Only serious offers, all options open, call 087-5289026

Nikon CoolPix 35mm digital camera. Selling this camera complete with case, charging stand,extra storage cards and mini tripod. Great camera for those who want great photos. THB 8,000. khuncoke@hotmail. com or phone 085 2236022 Sony Bravia 26” LCD flatscreen. Great condition. THB 6,500. Contact khuncoke@hotmail.com Pioneer home entertainment system - used but very good. Bought originally in the EU. Not a cheap copy!! THB 6,000. Contact khuncoke@ hotmail.com coleman igloo. big one on wheels. 3ft.by 2ft. handle allows you to wheel heavy load instead of breaking your back lifting it. paid 4200 sell 1900. like new. tiny one 1/10th size in tesco 500. call 0802446739 LAPTOP FOR SALE. Compaq Presario 2100 new 14” screen AMD ATHLON processor, Windows XP, charger & mouse. 8 yrs old, 4000 baht. Contact Bill 083 315 9710 Books to exchange - over 100 paperback books to swap. Please contact John on 083 305 4544 Panasonic 28” TV perfect condition Bht 2,000. Phone Mike 089 2024107 Dining table and 4 chairs 80 cm. X 120 cm. Light wood, modern as new condition. Can view in Hua Hin Soi 84, Can deliver. 3000 Bht. Tel. Keith 089-0702423 Wine refrigerator full of fine wines. I have a nearly new wine refrigerator full of fine wines for sale. I have had to stop drinking all together so I am offering this like new wine refrigerator with a full selection of fine wines. If you are interested come by and have a look and make an offer, or we can discuss the price. Mainly I just want to sell it all. I will only sell it as a complete unit, refrigerator and all wine included. Email ted@searescue.org camera for sale 35mm camera. olympus stylus. paid 9,500 for it 8 years ago. replaced battery 150baht. sell for 850baht. works perfect. call 0802446739 Washing machine for sale. 4 month old hardly used LG WT H950 fuzzy logic 9.5kg load capacity Washing machine for sale. All Guarantees and warranties. Bought at Tesco Market Village. New price 10 000, Asking Price 6500 -negotiable. Contact Fredrik at: 08 71 54 47 20 electrolux top range tumble dryer; new cost 25,000 baht, will take 12,000 baht. Phone 087 156 4409 (John)

Employment 2 experienced cooks wanted for new thai/ english restaurant. Good salary and working conditions telephone 0851 900 113. female staff wanted for established bar near Hua Hin centre. Pay and conditions negotiable. Please telephone 085 383 5387 or 082 244 1911. English speaking maid / housekeeper seeking work from May onwards. Reliable and hardworking. Call Ben on 0834264763 Part time teachers wanted. We are seeking part-time Native English speaking teachers. Must have credentials. Also seeking Native Thai teachers to teach Thai to English speakers. Age not important. Male or Female. Facility is licensed by Ministry of Education. Email CV with photo to: bapakdon@gmail.com Insight English Language School & Translation Centre. Thai national with advanced English skills and a minimum of 3 years teaching experience required to teach Thai, for more details contact david@ insightenglish.com

General - sports Golf Membership at Lakeview. I am selling my golf membership which is good for another 13 years. Best offer! Transfer fee not included. Contact me at khuncoke@hotmail.com COMPLETE set of ORIGINAL golf clubs. Selling a set of R/H clubs: Callaway Big Bertha Fusion irons,Callaway X (3 wood, 58 & 60 degree lob wedges), Taylor Made (R7 425, 10.5 driver with new med/flex shaft & 5 wood) 2 putters (Ping/Odyssey), Golden Bear rescue, Wilson golf bag, Mizuno bag, shoe bag, tees, balls, travel bag etc...Contact khuncoke@hotmail.com. THB 16,000

SCUBA DIVING EQUIPMENT For sale Poseidon Jetstream 1st & 2nd stage valves, contents & depth gauges, all hoses, mask, gloves 10,000 baht. Contact BILL 083 315 9710 pool cues for sale! Brand new and second hand. Please contact Andy on 086 178 1550 or come to the Lucky Shot bar and ask to view. Diamant road bicycle 2x9 speed ergopower For sale: very nice roadbike from 2002, Diamant (handmade in Belgium), 2x9 speed Campagnolo Ergopower, size is 57 cms center-top, suitable for persons from 1.75 to 1.85 cms. Asking price is 29.500 baht, including bottle cages, and a Cateye Mity 3 bike computer. The bike is in Hua Hin, pick up only please (I don’ t have a car). For more info or better pictures email khun.freek@gmail. com, telephone 080 638 0877. Or 080 160 2263 (Pa - Thai)

Motoring - 4 wheels plus The ORIGINAL TUNINGBOX! High Quality Tuning. ‘Plug & Drive’. The Tuningbox® add-on unit increases turbo diesel engine performance by 25 to 35% while at the same time reducing consumption by up to 10%. More details on www.awolonline.net/classads or contact tuningboxthailand@gmail.com Garmin Nuvi 200W GPS Around 2 years old but never been updated but apparently can be done in Bangkok. Contains full map of Thailand and has taken me all around Bangkok and many parts of Thailand flawlessly. Comes complete with dashboard/windscreen fixing kit and all original cables along with the original box and packaging. In excellent condition and perfect working order. Genuine reason to sell being have just changed cars and want a GPS that will connect to my new cars dashboard screen. Looking for around 5,000 Baht or any near offer. Contact Clive in Hua Hin on 0861692082 or email clivebaker@fireflyuk.net honda city auto 2006 honda city with 60,000kl. car in mint/ near new condition. wife’s car and she treated it like it was made of gold. honda serviced at 10-20-40-60,000kl. have honda book to confirm. 4 door gray color. we put 150,000 down and have paid 4 years at 9,500. you take over last year of payments, pay 250,000 and car is yours. call 0802446739 Hyundai Elantra 1.6 June 2542 Manual. 2 Lady owners from new, 130,000kms, 4 new tyres, Taxed until June 2554, Insured until May 2554 , Give away at 120,000Baht. Ask for Neil 081 817 3000 MAZDA TRIBUTE SUV. 2004 MAZDA TRIBUTE SUV V6 AUTO ,112000 kms, many extras ,taxed and fully insured to September 2010. Test drive available,good condition. 499000. Baht. Call :0871 633394/089 667 1312.. Toyota Vios GT for rent. 2010 White Vios available for rent. 1000bt per day, 6000bt per week or 20,000bt per mth Tel 0861 604261 Mitsubushi Colt, 1600 petrol, 4 door saloon, 118,000 km excellent condition, 2004 model, the car has been 100% reliable, 395,000 Baht or nearest offer,call David 0818469193 for more details. 2007 Toyota Hilux Vigo 4 door Auto Diesel looks and drives like new one owner 87,000 km Met Bronze only 580,000 baht. Tel 0861708720 or 0852848059

How to place a classified advert in AWOL and AWOLonline: Option 1 - email to classifieds@awolonline.net; Option 2 - write the details clearly in BLOCK capitals on paper and deliver to Noi at Sabai Bar, Soi Selekam; Option 3 - register at www.awolonline.net/classads and place your advert there. All options must be by 6 pm on the Tuesday before the printed issue you want to be included in. All adverts are free and will be included for at least four weeks automatically, except adverts by large companies - please contact sales@awolonline.net. 16


Cars & Pickups wanted for CASH!!!! CASH PAID for all late model (2004/2009) Cars and Pickups,in reasonable condition. Call Udo now :089 667 1312.

Motoring - 3 wheels & LESS honda cb 400 with book and plates; red and white 70,000 baht call Neil 081 817 3000 MOTO BIKES/ SCOOTERS for rent weekly >>>>monthly. Professionally maintained, current models. Competitively Priced Larger Models suit Farangs. Ph 085 3836633 Niyura info@thaihuahin.net BARGAIN SUZUKI A choice of two ....... Suzuki Hayate 125cc motorbikes. Well kept and maintained: 1 year old 30,000 B 2 year old 25,000 B These are really good bikes and very suitable for Farrangs Phone 0827179989 (daytime) or email chowsingcorp@yahoo.com SUZUKI SIDECAR (Sling) Suzuki motor bike (BEST) with sidecar(sling) attached... The Motorbike is fully rebuilt and sidecar is new with a “ fold down” ramp at the rear. 20,000 B Ph 08 27179989 Daytime OR email: chowsingcorp@yahoo.com Ex demo 125 cc dirt bike for sale. 4 months old, never driven off road. Baht 29,500 Tel 0818173000 Honda Steed 400cc for sale. Electric blue Honda Steed with 15,000km for sale in good condition. Serviced every 2 months. Recent new rear tyre. 85,000bt without book or 100,000bt with the book. Available to view at Play Sports Lounge, Soi 80 Tel 0861 604261 Motorbike for rent. Yamaha Nouvo Elegance for rent at 200bt per day, 1000bt per week or 3000bt per mth Tel 0861 604261 honda wave only 11 months old for sale at bargain price! 100cc, blue colour with only9000 km on the clock, just 25,000 baht. Contact 084 314 1138

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Property

land for sale 1.35 Rai on Soi 102; build a two storey house and have ocean views, Asking 3 million baht. Email wazwilliams000@aol.com or call 086 9536259 (Tao) VERY NICE LAND FOR SALE. 2 rai of land, 3 kms from Black Mountain. Near Sunny Valley project. Has water and electric. The land is split into 4 half rai plots and price is 400,000 per plot. A 5 year old fully paid up company can be purchased with the land. Please call 089 586 1700. Property wanted in Hua Hin. Two/Three bedroom townhome wanted in Cha Am, Hua Hin. Any condition taken into consideration, would like walking distance to beach Please email me with pictures, price and information to tonymoorhouse@googlemail.com CONDO FOR SALE TARA TARAA 5th Floor Mountain view , balcony , Pool and 3 min walk to the beach. In Farang name 2.850.000 bht or near offer. Tel Eng 0859308952 Tel Thi 0866655900 E.mail stephendobson911@hotmail.com Beautiful land for sale. REDUCED TO SELL This well sought after development land with beautiful views and cool breezes from the hills of Black mountain Bordered by the Royal Queens private land Minutes to over ten golf courses and only 5 minutes to Hua Hin central Excellent road access Power and water available on site This 4 rai and 60 wah plot has chanote title 1,500,000 per rai Tel : 0852629992 Furnished house/ Company Spacious detached house on the prestigious Mongkol Resort, 4 km from Hua Hin on the Pala-U Road. INTERNAL. Ground Floor: Lounge, Diner, Kitchen, Hall. Formally seperated from each other, though in a spacious open plan layout. Also guest Bathroom. Fitted kitchen - European/Bar style. First Floor: Two large Bedrooms, all furniture fitted. Master Bedroom 28 sqm, spare Bedroom 16 sqm. Large dual access Bathroom, ensuite to Master Bedroom and accessable via Landing for spare Bedroom. Teak Parque Flooring on Stairs and in Bedrooms. All doors are teak. All window frames are aluminium. Air Conditioning throughout. EXTERNAL. Integrated Car Port with storage. Balcony, Terrace and small well established garden. Residents have free use of the Mongkol Resort Hotel swimming pool. THE PROPERTY IS PRICED AT ONE MILLION BELOW VALUATION. Price Baht 3,500,000.00. Email williambattell@hotmail.com or phone 0861740871

Nice 56sqm apartment 1 bedroom for sale in Hua Hin. 500m from the beach and 5 min from town. Only 2 years old. Fully furnished : kitchen, living room, 1 separate bedroom, bathroom, terrace, TV, air con., many cupboards. Located in superb complex with big swimming pool 25X10, fitness, restaurant, pool house, private parking, 24hr security, garden, laundry .. Asking price : 2.900.000 Bth. For further info/photos please contact email philippe.rooman@gmail.com or tel. 080 659 6395 land on highway with house for sale in Pranburi across from Makro (296 sq wah) 1 bed, 2 bath, 3 million baht. English spoken, phone 081 378 3436

Condo for lease: Beautiful Palm Pavillion, next to beach, 2 br 2 bath, 128 sq. meters, magnificent sea views, two large balconies, gated entrance, 24 hour security, cctv, building wi-fi, large swimming pool, 5 minutes from center of Hua-Hin. Across the road from Hua-Hin Toyota. 30,000 baht per month. Owner will reduce rent if paid year in advance. Call 086 104 9412. Rent house. 4br/2baths, large living room, large kitchen and Den. 2 balconies - both large, front and back. Comes furnished. 15,000 month. 4 km from town centre. Call 080 244 6739.

PERSONAL & SERVICES THAI LESSONS FOR Foreigners. Email mikekaye80@hotmail.com or call 0817632113 ranong visa run: “Friendly Car Service” includes your visa fee paid plus boat trip and ham roll. Price 2500 baht. Phone Ae 087 166 9489 (Thai & English), emailmanotip2008@live.com, or visit our new office opposite Hua Hin railway station. Golf Lessons available on simulator. Have an issue with your golf swing and just can’t put your finger on it? Let us put you on our golf simulator and we can show you where it is going wrong. Don’t just go to the driving range and practice a bad swing. You can see every swing analyzed right here at Play Sports Lounge in Soi 80. Lessons available at 750bt or simply use the range here for 100bt per 30mins. Proven technique has reduced a player from 1.7 to 0.9 in just 3 weeks!! Call 0861 604261 TAXIS BANGKOK AIRPORT Pattaya at very competitive prices. Call Kannika on 0837336695 BOAT TOURS FISHING snorkelling tours to suit your needs from 1850 to 2300 baht p/p. Private charter available at very good rates. Call for more details 0837336695 Kannika affordable security systems for your home. Contact property@awolonline.net or call 081 614 8728

085 383 5387 082 244 1911

Rentals

Room for rent in guesthouse. Room 4,000 baht a month. Great security system, finger print scanner, air conditioner in every room,water heater, TV (cable extra), fridge, wardrobe ,dressing table,large car park,laundry service,free high speed internet wifi, minimart, swimming pool. Off Soi 6, Ideal for the budget traveller. Contact tonymoorhouse@googlemail.com or call 0861 -776994 Comfortable studio apartment in the centre of Hua Hin in boutique condominium block. 5 mins walk from night market, 10 mins from city centre, shops, bars and nightlife and the beach. King sized bed, flat screen TV/DVD player and selection of films, balcony with table and chairs, air con, free Internet on communal computers in reception, large pool with sun beds, fitness room and sauna. 24 hour security and reception, car and motorbike parking. nickargles@yahoo.co.uk 0897 213 384 3br/3bath house brand new home. located on Palau road and intersection of highway 4. 10 kl. from town. small living room and kitchen. 1 bedroom you can change to den/computer room. Long term rental only at 5,000baht month. 2 year payment up front. 120,000baht. Unfurnished. Huge lot next door included perfect for garden with plenty of room for veggies and flowers. Home and lot enclosed with fence. Call 080 244 6739 Beautiful 3 Bed/2 Bath Villa Hua Hin. Very close to city centre and beach. Fully furnished with Thai decor, A/C, full western kitchen, Plasma TV, DVD, stereo, and a swimming pool out the front french doors. Sleeps six comfortably. Available for rent by the day, week or month. Contact Craig by email, craigchapman@shaw.ca. brand new house 5kms from Hua Hin centre. Spanish style, fully new furnished - Summerland residence, 2 bedrooms with air, 2 baths, European kitchen, living room, cable TV, LCD TV. Private swimming pool, security. Available by weekend, week, month or long term. Contact franckphuket@hotmail.com Beachside Condo Khao Takiab. Brand new 2 bed/ 2 bath apartment in the Breeze. 85 Sq m fully furnished. Rental Baht 1,200 to 2,100 per day depending on duration. Min stay 1 week. Email peterandwasana@ yahoo.co.uk More pictures and details at www. b307thebreeze.weebly.com

Wanted Wanted 2nd hand Iphone or Ipod. Looking for 2nd hand Iphone or Ipod, must be in good condition and working. If you feel you may wish to upgrade to a new one and sell your old one, please contact tony@layangardens. com. Basically I need a phone that has email capabilities and has wifi for internet. anything considered with the above two features. Looking to buy used restaurant equipment. Just starting so I need pretty much everything. I particularly need a Griddle, Slushy Machine, and Refrigerators. But if you have counters, chairs, tables, A bar, ect. please call. Albert 087 092 1614

17

To

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Cryptic Crossword

Across 7 Laver returns to reportedly employ rates again (8) 9 Get away from some bloke’s cap easily (6) 10 Tie dimples all over the place - don’t go any faster! (5,5) 11 Storage tower is back to blue, almost (4) 12 Leo takes insect to shed (4-2) 13 Sociable expenditure? (8) 14 Turn in a ring - maybe a weapon (3-3) 17 Festival of the orient before mid-term? (6) 19 Had an impact on new deft face (8) 21 China’s first Romeo has some headgear for Kings? (6) 23 Stepped back into mud or trash (4) 24 Funny Mel enters instant part-payment (10) 26 Fast train starts to move at great lick, entering Vienna (6) 27 Increases guns with meat destruction (8)

The solution is on page 20. If you are interested in sponsoring this or any other section, please contact us on sales@awolonline.net or call 081 649 8361.

Bar For Sale

Two storey premises which has bar area, three bedrooms and three bathrooms, plus four air conditioning units. Located in busy town centre street.

Low price of 1 million baht for quick sale

Please contact 080 991 8565, 081 614 8728 or property@awolonline.net for more information and details. 18

Down 1 Place to worship part of your head? (6) 2 See 17 3 Demolish and pluck feathers? (4,4) 4 Music group playing eastern texts? (6) 5 S. Rossi returns with empty cross cutters (8) 6 Open clue to provide wealth (8) 8 Sign of hearing an instrument? (6) 15 Hellish plant surrounded by broken nail (8) 16 Grasping, grasping - I left in a grasping sort of way (8) 17/2 Switch value - what you get for your money abroad! (8,4) 18 Some characters from Rhodes sail for European city (6) 20 Eve hit out at Rob (6) 22 Number of men in etymology (6) 25 Come across flesh, we hear (4)

...STOP PRESS!...

RELIABLE, HONEST, TALENTED & HARD WORKING CONSTRUCTION GANG FOUND IN HUA HIN. ANY JOBS UNDERTAKEN, ANYWHERE, FROM LEAKING PIPES TO COMPLETE HOUSES.

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Disclaimer: All articles are published in good faith and based on information available to us at publication, No responsibility is accepted other than that stipulated by law. Although the information in this publication has been obtained from sources believed to be reliable, AWOL cannot guarantee accuracy in all cases. Any opinions expressed are those of the contributor and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher. All materials copyright. All rights reserved and no part of this publication may be reproduced in part or in full without the previous written consent of the publisher. Neither can any part be stored in a retrieval situation, nor transmitted by electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or any other means. AWOL is printed by Petchpoom Printing, and we can be contacted on info@awolonline.net or 081 614 8728. Please send any other communications to Mrs Chukamol James, Managing Director, AWOL Co. Ltd., 136/229 Emerald Hill, Soi 6, Mooban Borfai, Hua Hin, Prachuap Kiri Khan, 77110, THAILAND.

19


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LUCKY SHOT BAR

Hua Hin’s only pool bar with THREE 9’ tables Ask about our drinks specials and other special offers Contact Andy on 086 178 1550 27/3 Poolsuk Road, Hua Hin

Ball In Hand Brunswick Hua Hin & Khao Takiab Ladies League Results Week 21 13th September 2010 No match - Railway Tavern Sports Bar 5 - 7 Dara Bar Sunset B’d : 4 - 8 Bobbys Bangers Talk of the Town 6 - 6 Kom Hom Thaiwaii 8 - 4 Bob and Nok’s The Lord Webb 5 - 7 Garden Bar 2 League Table Team Bob / Nok’s Garden 2 Dara Bar Kom Hom Thaiwaii Railway T Talk / Town Bobbys Bs Sunset B’d Sports Bar Lord Webb

P 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 19 20 19

W 13 12 12 9 9 9 6 5 5 5 4

D 3 3 1 6 3 1 4 4 3 3 1

L 3 4 6 4 7 9 9 10 11 12 14

+/30 54 32 8 18 16 -4 -34 -32 -38 -50

Pts 29 27 25 24 21 19 16 14 13 13 9

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 22 20th September 2010 No match - Sports Bar Bob and Nok’s v Talk of the Town Bobbys Bangers v Thaiwaii Dara Bar v Sunset Boulevard Garden Bar 2 v Railway Tavern Kom Hom v The Lord Webb

Pool Leagues Hua Hin Pool Billiard League Results Matchday 4 10th Sept. 2010 Curly’s Bar 7 - 1 Return Bar Dick’s Office A 2 - 6 Eagle A Eagle B 4 - 4 Thaiwaii Bar JW Red 4 - 4 Sunset Boulevard Lucky Shot B 3 - 5 Oasis Play Sports 6 - 2 Dick’s Office B Sugar Cane 7 - 1 Lucky Shot A Talk Of The Town 4 - 4 JW Black League Table Team Eagle A Oasis Play Sports JW Red Thaiwaii Talk / Town JW Black Lucky Sh B Sugar Cane Eagle B Sunset B’d Lucky Sh A Curly’s Bar Dick’s B Dick’s A Return Bar

P 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4

W 4 4 3 2 2 2 1 1 1 1 0 1 1 0 0 0

D 0 0 0 2 1 1 2 2 2 2 3 1 0 1 1 0

L Diff. Pts 0 18 8 0 14 8 1 10 6 0 4 6 1 4 5 1 2 5 1 4 4 1 4 4 1 2 4 1 0 4 1 -4 3 2 -6 3 3 -6 2 3 -12 1 3 -16 1 4 -18 0

FOR SALE

5 RAI LAND IN NONG KHA NEAR THE ROAD OPPOSITE HUAY MONKOL PRICE 2,000,000 BAHT 250 SQ. WAH LAND IN KHAO DANG PRICE 2,000,000 BAHT (8,000 BAHT/SQ. WAH) CALL 081 614 8728

Refurbishing your bar? Refitting your business? Reliable, efficient workers available NOW! Contact Tel. 081 614 8728 email: property@awolonline.net

20

Body Art By Cha In Poolsuk Plaza on Poolsuk Rd Mob. 086 739 8645

Email: brazeheadtattoo@hotmail.com

This Week’s Fixtures Matchday 5 17th Sept. 2010 Dick’s Office B v Eagle B Eagle A v Oasis JW Black v Curly’s Bar Lucky Shot A v JW Red Play Sports Lounge v Lucky Shot B Return Bar v Dick’s Office A Sunset B’d v Talk Of The Town Thaiwaii Bar v Sugar Cane Next Week’s Fixtures Matchday 6 24th Sept. 2010 Curly’s Bar v Sunset Boulevard Dick’s Office A v JW Black Eagle B v Play Sports Lounge JW Red v Thaiwaii Bar Lucky Shot B v Eagle A Oasis v Return Bar Sugar Cane v Dick’s Office B Talk Of The Town v Lucky Shot A

Now online! All the local sports results as soon as they are available on our website, www.awolonline.net Just click on ‘Local Sports’ and then the sport of your choice

Cryptic Crossword Solution


Pool Leagues brought to you by Lucky Shot Bar Ball In Hand Brunswick Hua Hua Hin Social Pool League Mr Dan’s Hua Hin 8-Ball League League Table Hin & Khao Takiab League Results Results Team P W L +/- Pts Week 8 15th September 2010 Week 22 15th September 2010 DicksB 11 - 1 Maria Bar Jungl Juice B 34 31 3 166 62 Bob and Nok’s v TNT Bar n/a Komhom 11 - 15 Eagle Bar PP 33 29 4 157 58 Bobby’s Bangers 8 - 10 Thaiwaii MrDanA 6 - 6 DicksA 34 23 11 86 46 Dara Bar 12 - 6 Sunset Boulevard JW Red Play Sports v Boapa’s Place n/a King Bar Men 33 22 11 25 44 Dizzy Dolphin 10 - 8 Sports Bar Garden Bar 2 11 - 7 Railway Tavern Jungl Juice A 32 20 12 34 40 League Table 32 19 13 22 38 Oasis Bar 10 - 8 Play Sports Lounge Limelight Team P W D L +/- Pts League Table Team Play Sports Dara Bar Oasis Bar Sunset B’d Thaiwaii Garden 2 Dizzy Dolph Railway T Bobby’s Bs Bob / Nok’s Sports Bar TNT Bar

P 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 22 21 22 21

W 18 15 14 15 11 11 10 8 7 6 1 0

D 2 2 3 1 7 3 1 3 2 1 3 2

L 2 5 5 6 4 8 11 11 13 14 18 19

+/102 64 78 68 54 34 -2 -22 -44 -34 -124 -174

Pts 38 32 31 31 29 25 21 19 16 13 5 2

Next Week’s Fixtures The season is over!

HUTSADIN ELEPHANT FOUNDATION

Help the Elephants of this area - many are now unable to be kept by their owners due to ill health, age or being unable to work any more. The Hutsadin Elephant Foundation will take care of these animals but needs both volunteers and donations to do so. Please help these gentle giants, or just visit them at the Foundation on the Pala-U Road. Tel: 032 827098 or 081 199 0798. email: wut611@hotmail.com

Sabai Billys JW Black Int/l Butterfly Lazy Daze A Headrock U-Turn Red Bar London Bar Lazy Daze B King Ladies Billy’s Babes

32 31 34 33 33 32 31 32 31 32 30 31

18 16 15 15 13 12 11 11 10 10 8 7

14 15 19 18 20 20 20 21 21 22 22 24

34 9 -20 -31 -23 -30 -61 -70 -41 -92 -68 -97

36 32 30 30 26 24 22 22 20 20 16 14

Next Week’s Fixtures There is an end of season presentation and meeting being held at King Bar next Wenesday 22nd September from 7.30pm to hand out the gongs and discuss any possible changes. Please come along to cheer and choose.

Check out the AWOL forum Join up and start a discussion about your league! www.awolonline.net/forum

Dick’s Office

Bar/restaurant open daily Best Sunday Roasts now with NZ Lamb every week, extensive menu, good music, pool & darts competitions, big screen projector for live sports, Nintendo Wii, quiz nights, parties and more!

Eagle Bar Komhom Boapa’s DicksB MrDanA Play Sports Maria Bar DicksA

8 8 6 8 8 6 8 8

8 6 4 2 1 1 1 1

0 0 0 2 3 3 2 2

0 30 16 2 16 12 2 6 8 4 -2 6 4 -6 5 2 -8 5 5 -16 4 5 -20 4

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 9 22nd September 2010 DicksA v Boapa’s Place Eagle Bar v DicksB Komhom v Play Sports Lounge Maria Bar v MrDanA Mr Dan’s Hua Hin 9-Ball League Results Week 7 13th September 2010 Dicks A 14 - 12 Mr Dan A Dolphin 17 - 8 Dicks B Eagle Bar v Play Sports n/a Kom Hom 11 - 15 Eagle Bar 2 League Table Team Eagle Bar 2 Kom Hom Dolphin Mr Dan A Play Sports Dicks A Dicks B Eagle Bar

P W D 7 5 1 7 5 0 7 4 0 7 4 0 5 2 1 6 2 0 7 2 0 6 1 0

L 1 2 3 3 2 4 5 5

+/- Pts 36 11 20 10 20 8 -1 8 16 5 -20 4 -49 4 -22 2

Next Week’s Fixtures Week 8 20th September 2010 Dicks B v Dolphin Eagle Bar 2 v Kom Hom Mr Dan A v Dicks A Play Sports Lounge v Eagle Bar

Located on Soi 80 (Sarawat) Tel: 089-046 9505, 085-930 7232 email: huahindick@hotmail.com

21

Cry Or

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Darts Leagues

on the oche with

Results 14/09/2010 Division 1 CAT House 3 - 15 Scandic Bar A JW Black 11 - 7 Paradise Jungle Juice 9 - 9 Lazy Daze Lucky Shot 10 - 8 JW Red Thaiwaii 5 - 13 CAT A

Division 2 Dick’s Office B 16 - 2 Scandic C Kom Hom v Kom Hom Ladies n/a Play Sports 2 - 16 Jaew Bar Sabai Bar 11 - 7 Dick’s Office A Scandic Bar B 9 - 9 CAT Jiggapik

Division 1 League Table

Division 2 League Table

Team Scandic A JW Black CAT A Jungl Juice JW Red Paradise Lucky Sht Lazy Daze Thaiwaii CAT House

Team Sabai Bar Scandic B Dick’s B Jaew Bar Scandic C Kom Hom KH Ladies Dick’s A Play Sports CAT Jiggap

P W D 4 4 0 4 3 0 4 3 0 4 2 1 4 2 0 4 2 0 4 2 0 4 0 2 4 0 1 4 0 0

L +/- Pts 0 46 8 1 18 6 1 12 6 1 8 5 2 18 4 2 8 4 2 -6 4 2 -16 2 3 -40 1 4 -48 0

P 5 4 3 5 5 2 3 3 4 2

W 4 3 2 2 2 1 1 1 1 0

D 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1

L 1 0 1 3 3 1 2 2 3 1

+/- Pts 20 8 34 7 14 4 4 4 -20 4 -2 2 -8 2 -10 2 -24 2 -8 1

Fixtures 21/09/2010 Cup - Preliminary Round JW Red v Thaiwaii

Dick’s Office B v Jaew Bar

Sabai Bar v Scandic Bar C

CAT Jiggapik v Scandic Bar A

Hua Hin Golf Society

Results: 14th Sept. - Kaeng Krachan C-B St’ford 7 entrants. 1st Tomas Chueanil 14hcp 34pts. 2nd Robert Bird 10hcp 34 pts. 10th September - Palm Hills St’ford 28 Entrants. 1st Bernard Morgan 23hcp 40pts. 2nd Nitha Dittkuhn 14hcp 40pts. 3rd Gary Cooper 8hcp 38pts. 4th Kari Matti Mannikko 8hcp 37pts. Near pin hole 8 Timo Ripatti. Hole 15 Robert Laminit. Next week’s fixtures: Tue 21st Black Mountain Golf Society Masters Fri 24th Banyan Stableford

Got a golf membership to sell? Looking for some new clubs or want to trade up? Try the free AWOL Classifieds in this paper or online at www.awolonline.net/classads

AWOL - For The Swinger In All Of Us! 22

For all your darts supplies 087 155 7737

10% OFF FOR DARTS LEAGUE PLAYERS

Individuals (not updated) Top 10 Division 1 1 Oil Jungle Juice 2 Ball CAT A 3 Mark JW Red 4 Rune Scandic Bar A 5 Dicky JW Black 6 Dick Paradise 7 Golf Scandic Bar A 8 Cop Scandic Bar A 9 Doug Jungle Juice 10 Tie CAT A

49 42 42 40 39 38 37 36 32 28

Top 6 Division 2 1 Stue Scandic Bar B 2 Daeng Scandic Bar B 3 Ankana Scandic Bar C 4 Jim Dick’s Office B 5 Derek Sabai Bar 6 Mack Scandic Bar B

60 49 44 43 41 35

Butterfly Rock Golf

Results: September 15th Landcorp Trophy Lakeview AD - Ryder Cup Format Eng vs ROW 48 players Doubles event ROW 7 / Eng 5; Singles event ROW 12 / Eng 12. ROW win 19 to 17. Thanks to Captains John Callaghan (ROW) and Howard Lewis (England) Sept. 13th Lake View CD - stableford 10 players 1st - Geoff Batt-Rawden (8) - 44pts, 2nd - Reto Vorburger (7) - 35pts, 3rd - Brent O’Bell (6) - 34pts Sept. 10th Lake View AB - stableford 13 players 1st - Barry Fitzgerald (9) 39 pts, 2nd - Greg Dickinson (19) 37 pts, 3rd - John Anstee (23) 36 pts September 10th Palm Hills - stableford 8 players Front 9 - 18 pts - Klaus Kristensen. Mark Moore (Guest), Back 9 - 19 pts - Klaus Kristensen Overall - 37 pts - Klaus Kristensen Sept. 8th Palm Hills - 2 man betterball 6 teams 1st - Phil Simons & Don. Bayley - 41 points 2nd - Dick Owen & Klaus Kristensen - 40 points Sept. 6th Lake View AB - strokeplay 10 players 1st - David Baker (8) - nett 72, 2nd - Paul Williams (1) - nett 74, 3rd - Bill Malone (17) - nett 74 Forthcoming Fixtures Mon Sept 20th St’ford/Skins Lake View AB from 10am Wed Sept 22nd Stableford Springfield AB from 10am Friday Sept 24th - Palm Hills


Premier League News

Fixtures and predictions (all times Thailand) Saturday, 18 September 2010 Stoke v West Ham, 18:45 The Hammers have officially made their worst ever start to a season and they need some sort of result here. Given their failings dealing with hig balls into the box we can’t see them getting it. Home win. Aston Villa v Bolton, 21:00 Villa will finally have Gerard Houllier installed and we expect a reaction immediately. Home win. Blackburn v Fulham, 21:00 Mark Hughes returns to one of his old clubs, who we don’t think will do him any favours. Home win. Everton v Newcastle, 21:00 The Blues will have been bouyed by their dramatic comeback last week and suspect that they will roll over the Barcodes. Tottenham v Wolves, 21:00 Tough one to call; Spurs have major injury worries and European matches while Wolves have made a good start, A shock away win. West Brom v Birmingham, 21:00 Eleven places but only two points seperate these great rivals and we think the Baggies will get one over the Blues on this occasion. Sunderland v Arsenal, 23:30 Even at this early stage the Gunners need to keep pace with Chelsea but this is a tricky fixture; we think a draw. Sunday, 19 September 2010 Man Utd v Liverpool, 19:30 As True Visions like to somewhat inappropriately call it given the political divide here, the Red War 085 817 3642 032 534448

Open

everyday 9am - 11pm

International & Thai Food

Swiss specials - Jagerschnitzel (170฿) & Zueri Geschnetzelel (190 ฿) S O I 5 6

CANAL ROAD

PETCHKASEM ROAD

Premier League Table Team P GD Pts 1 Chelsea 4 16 12 2 Arsenal 4 10 10 3 Man Utd 4 6 8 4 Blackpool 4 0 7 5 Birmingham 4 1 6 6 Fulham 4 1 6 7 Aston Villa 4 -3 6 8 Man City 4 2 5 9 Wolverhampton 4 0 5 10 Sunderland 4 0 5 11 Tottenham 4 0 5 12 Bolton 4 -1 5 13 Liverpool 4 -2 5 14 Newcastle 4 1 4 15 Blackburn 4 -1 4 16 West Brom 4 -6 4 17 Wigan 4 -9 4 18 Stoke 4 -3 3 19 Everton 4 -2 2 20 West Ham 4 -10 0 is always compulsive viewing. Liverpool were inept last week while United unexpectedly let Everton back in. Draw. Wigan v Man City, 21:00 City seem to be living proof that you can’t buy success, while Wigan are as unpredictable as they come. Another draw. Chelsea v Blackpool, 22:00 The tangerine dream is alive and well but we think it will get a good kicking here. Chelsea won in second gear last week and this could be a heavy home win.

kicked off by

155 Bobby’s Bar 087 7737 or

And Restaurant

089 985 7473

Darts,Pool, All Day Breakfasts Soi 102, Hua Hin (200m on right after railway)

Fantasy League & I Know The Score AWOL Challenge Top 10 Team TW Tot 1 LOST CAFE 49 244 2 Beeblebrox 63 238 3 Tahitian Queen 35 237 4 mongkolmuppets 49 227 5 Mr ChaAming 39 226 6 Event Horizon FC 25 219 7 Hua Hin United 50 216 8 play it again 35 202 9 Pride Of Africa 69 196 10 Wanderlust United 33 186

1 2 3 4 5

AWOL Pundits Top 5 Player Tot TW sfirish 245 +20 awol99 230 +50 triplepeel 195 -5 tonyh29 175 +25 steviewanderlust 90 -20

You can still join both these leagues and still have a chance to win, although every week you leave it reduces your chances. Just email us on info@awolonline. net or visit www.awolonline.net/ forum for details.

BOAPA’S PLACE The first farang establishment in Borfai Now with new Pool table European and Thai food Kjøttkaker og Lapskaus Open from 11am 085 425 1185 (Pa)

Garden bar and restaurant

23

Sing

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No More Scandals? Stars unite to keep their dirty laundry hidden

london, england A group of current and former sports superstars are preparing a shock class lawsuit against the world’s press, claiming that their lives and careers have been significantly affected by the media’s lascivious reporting of their private life sex, drug, drink, gambling and violence problems. Newspapers, magazines, television broadcasters, internet sites, and Jeremy Clarkson have been named in the press release read out by publicist Max Clifford this week, who only on Monday was defending his client Ricky Hatton from press revelations about his drink and drug problems. Following these revelations Hatton coincidentally entered a rehab clinic. Among the group of superstars are Tiger Woods, John Terry, Wayne Rooney, Hatton, Steven Gerrard, Rio Ferdinand, Paul Gascoigne, David Beckham, Ashley Cole, Frank Lampard and Gary Lineker. When asked why Lineker, former England and Spurs striker and now presenter of the BBC’s Match of the Day programme, was involved, Clifford told reporters that he was fed up of the jokes about his mammoth

Gary Lineker models for the Armani job jug ears, which had prevented him becoming the ‘Armani Man’ and having to settle for being the ‘Walker’s Crisps Man’. Apparently Robert Green wanted to join the group on the grounds that his career is in ruins due to media reporting, but was refused as the others were worried that in court he might ‘drop the ball’. Other sporting and non-sporting celebrities, including George Michael (right), Hugh Grant, Britney Spears, Graham Le Saux, Bill Clinton, George Clooney, Tom Cruise and William Hague are apparently considering joining the class action as well but all Clifford would say was “Hmm, well, maybe Spears and Clinton, but all the

rest....they’re a bit, well, you know...” Professor Jock Strap from the University of Studies in Willenhall specialises in sports psychology and had this to say about the action; “I think they are all nuts. Most of them have had big payouts from papers like the Sun or News Of The World over the past few years and it is quite clear that the vast majority of the public don’t give two hoots about where Wazza waves his willy or what Hatton honks up his hooter. They’ll still pay to see them punch someone else’s lights out. Mind you, Lineker has got massive ears.” More as we get it.

“The local establishment with local prices” Be served by the hostesses with the mostest!

Happy Hour Every Day from 3 - 7pm

Excellent Thai & Western food Cajun/Louisiana style & Nightly Specials Our regulars recommend the BBQ Spare Ribs & the King Pork Chops

Thai & International Satellite channels Pool Table, Darts

To find us, travel north on the canal road past the traffic lights and turn left at the bridge after the petrol station and right immediately over it. We are on the right. Tel. 032-522 418, 083-317-3008 12/10 Soi Samoprong, Hua Hin 24


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