Smag24july2016

24 July 2016

Down to earth Why clay is the ultimate beauty secret

A vintage year Alan Titchmarsh’s guide to the grapevine

Beach party Your most stylish holiday ever

Going for gold Meet three inspirational Paralympians

Contents 24 July 2016

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5 Get this!

This week’s must-haves 8 Focus Why fabulous floral frocks are summer’s growing trend 10 Hippy, hippy chic Itsy-bitsy bikinis, kaftans and shell jewellery for a laid-back beach vibe 32 In the closet TV presenter Kate Thornton reveals her style secrets

22 Conquering heroes Meet three brave and inspirational Paralympians who are aiming to strike gold at Rio 28 Hot to trot In racing silks by Vivienne Westwood, S Magazine’s intrepid Victoria Gray is put through her paces at Glorious Goodwood 57 My favourite photo Comedian Joe Pasquale recalls being tickled pink on the set of the hilarious musical Spamalot

Lifestyle

Regulars

30 Something for the weekend Check out Europe and the UK for short but sweet breaks 38 Victoria’s best Victoria Gray makes scents with fragrant home diffusers 40 Interiors Make summer a breeze with colourful alfresco accessories 42 Food Add vanilla to your sweets for the essence of the season 49 Wine Jamie Goode casts his net far and wide for unusual vintages 50 Gardens Alan Titchmarsh has grape expectations for growing vines at home in the garden

7 First look The hottest tickets in town 16 Beauty It’s a mud lark with clay-based masks to perk up your complexion 36 Agony aunt Your sexual, emotional and medical problems solved, by Jane O’Gorman and Dr Rosemary Leonard 52 Criminal minds Gripping thrillers you won’t want to put down 55 Fiction An exclusive short story by novelist Emma Hannigan 59-74 Switch on The week on TV and radio 77 WIN! WIN! WIN! A holiday of a lifetime to Las Vegas and UK breaks could be yours 79 Mindy Hammond School’s out for Willow, but it’s our columnist and her friends who are in the mood to party...

81 Stars Lori Reid predicts your week 82 The £1,000 crossword Pit your wits against our prize puzzle, plus the £50 Mystery Word Bonus

Fashion

People 18 Life as I know it With Olympic gold-winning cycling champion Laura Trott 20 Ferne McCann The TOWIE star turned TV presenter on meeting Hollywood A-listers, mishaps and making time for dating

Editor Margaret Hussey Art Director Greg Anderson Supplements Picture Editor Karen Vowles Picture Editor Sarah White Production Editor Jan Brierley Features Editor Nicole Carmichael Lifestyle Editor Victoria Gray Fashion Director Paula O’Connor Deputy Fashion Editor Sally-Anne Argyle Commissioning Editor Laura Mulley Literary Editor Charlotte Heathcote Feature Writer Kirsten Jones Deputy Production Editor Neil Porter Fashion Assistant Sian O’Donnell Sub Editors Bridget Rowan, Richard Trenchard, Claudia Shipley Contributing Designer Tim Holland S Magazine is published by Express Newspapers, Fourth Floor, Northern & Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN. © Express Newspapers 2016

Follow us on Twitter @SMagazineUK and on Instagram @smagazineuk

22 Left: Bikini top, £55, Lisa Maree (lisamaree. com.au); briefs, £18, Urban Outfitters (urbanoutfitters.com); necklace, £49, Tamarzizt (tamarzizt.com); bracelet, £30, Pebble London (pebblelondon.com); bangle, £60, Stella & Dot (stelladot.com); bangle, £135, Very Exclusive (very.com); clutch, £16, Boohoo (boohoo.com)

The things they say...

“All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much” George Harrison (1943-2001)

31 On the cover: Bikini, £190, Heidi Klein (heidiklein.com); cover-up, £40, River Island (riverisland.com); necklace, £185, Nocturne at Very (veryexclusive.co.uk); bracelet, £135, Very Exclusive (as above); choker, £99; Daisy London (daisyjewellery.com)

Get this!

There’s something for every budget in this week’s must-have selection compiled by laura mulley

PlumP uP the Volume wunderkiss lip-plumping gloss, £24.95, wunder2 (020 3130 6792, wunder2.co.uk)

aPPles of your eye highlighter pens, £7.99, amazon (0800 496 1081, amazon.co.uk)

out to lunch lego lunchbox, £12.99, Very (0844 822 2321, very.co.uk)

edito ch r’s oice

Bling and Buy metropolis cross-body bag, £225, furla (furla.com)

fire and ice Patrón Xo cafe incendio liqueur, £32.95, the whisky exchange (020 8838 9388, thewhiskyexchange.com)

riPPing yarns Enid Blyton’s Summer Stories, £6.99, express Bookshop (see page 81)

wall of fame Plaque plate, £42.50, Product of your environment (07775 621255, productofyourenvironment.co.uk)

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home and dry Pack of two tea towels, £17.95, Victoria eggs (020 7704 2840, victoriaeggs.com)

roBot wars uBtech alpha 1s robot, £399, toys r us, amazon and costco

full circle necklace, £14, m&co (0333 202 0720, mandco.com) 5

first

Getty ImaGes / NatIoNal trust ImaGes / JohN mIllar / kNowsley safarI

look

It’s game on this week watching the world Cup 66 at wembley, seeing animals in the wild and meeting the stars at Countryfile live Compiled by Kirsten Jones

SEE

Join the crowds at the sse wembley arena on saturday to relive england’s dramatic victory at the fIfa world Cup 1966. Celebrating 50 years since england lifted the trophy, world Cup ’66 live invites football fans back to the pitch for match footage, live music and nostalgia with special guest sir Bobby Charlton. Presented by Jeremy Vine and louise minchin, the live event will be on radio and screened in selected cinemas from 2.30pm. tickets cost from £40. Cinema prices vary.

Visit wc66.org.

EAT

Get a taste of Venice at london’s Columbia restaurant, bar and terrace this summer. terrazza on the thames, its riverside pop-up in the heart of the Docklands, offers a Venetian-inspired menu of prosecco, tapas and live music, in gondola-style booths with skyscraper views. It’s open all week until september 30. for more details, visit columbiarestaurant.co.uk.

Go To BooK

Get your tickets now for the brand-new rural festival, Countryfile live. taking place from august 4 to 7 at Blenheim Palace in oxfordshire, the event will celebrate the British countryside, playing host to more than 500 exhibitors of food and crafts, 60 working farm vehicles and adam henson’s famous farm. Quiz Countryfile presenters matt Baker and John Craven, watch the animals at work at the Dog & Duck show and enjoy family entertainment from tug of war to morris dancing on the Village Green. advance family tickets cost £72.60 from countryfilelive.com.

MuST haves Blast into space, enjoy a romantic read and catch up with a crime drama this week s maGaZINe ★ 24 July 2016

Star Trek Beyond stranded on a hostile planet in unchartered space, Captain kirk (Chris Pine), spock (Zachary Quinto) and the enterprise crew face a mysterious alien enemy who puts everything they stand for to the test. also starring simon Pegg, it’s in cinemas now.

take a drive on the wild side at knowsley safari Park in Prescot, merseyside. the family-friendly “drivethru” experience invites visitors to get up close and personal with wildlife from around the world. see the lazy lions, catch a glimpse of Nomvula the baby rhino and watch the baboons make mischief in the woods. take a ride in your own car or catch the Baboon Bus with your very own guide. you can also transform your little ones into tigers at the facepainting station and enjoy an animal encounter with the elephants. a family tickets costs from £55. Visit knowsleysafariexperience.co.uk.

The Trouble With Henry And Zoe meeting just four months until Zoe plans to board a plane alone, will her short romance with henry change her mind? the new heart-warming novel by andy Jones is out on thursday, price £7.99. see express Bookshop on page 81.

Gomorrah: Season Two Catch up with the second season of this gripping Italian crime drama, as a backstreet war unfolds against the savastano family. Based on roberto saviano’s bestseller, it’s out on Blu-ray and DVD tomorrow from £19.99.

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Wild at heart

Flaunt your florals this summer and make sure they’re bold and beautiful Compiled by Sally-Anne Argyle Top row, from left: Blue and white, £14, George at Asda (0800 952 3003, george.com) Rose shift, £24.99, New Look (0344 499 6690, newlook.com) Red and green print, £27.99, New Look (as before) Bottom row, from left: Black wrap-over, £55, Topshop (0344 984 0264, topshop.com) White and pale pink, £60, Wallis (0344 984 0266, wallis.co.uk) Black with coral flowers, £29, Very (0844 822 2321, very.co.uk) White wallflower print, £60, River Island (0344 576 6444, riverisland.com) Pale pink, £90, Laura Ashley (0333 200 8009, lauraashley.com) Pink and green, £69.50, Oliver Bonas (020 8974 0110, oliverbonas.com)

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Focus From left: Bandeau dress, £65; bangles, £4 for a set; prom dress, £65; ring, £6.50 for a set, all Miss Selfridge (0344 984 0263, missselfridge.com)

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Embellished cover-up, £40, River Island (0344 576 6444, riverisland. com); bikini, £190, Heidi Klein (020 7259 9424, heidiklein.com); silver moon choker, £99, Daisy London (020 3214 3175, daisyjewellery.com); silver shell ring, from a selection at F Zeen Retreat (020 7183 5383, uniquekefalonia. com/boutique-hotel); statement necklace, £185; marble-effect bracelet, £135, both Nocturne at Very Exclusive (0344 755 1000, veryexclusive. co.uk); silver bangle, £60, Stella & Dot (stelladot.com)

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Soul Start with the swimwear, then let your accessories do the talking Styling by Paula O’Connor Photographs by Neil Marriott

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

fAShIoN

sister

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Shirt, £30, Miss Selfridge (0344 984 0263, missselfridge. com); Virginia bikini top, £85, Paolita; marble-effect bracelet, £135, Nocturne, both at Very Exclusive (as before); Luna pompom sandals, £99.99, Me, Myself & Jonny (memyselfandjonny. co.uk); silver shell ring; silver spike shell ring, both from a selection at F Zeen Retreat (as before); silver bangle, £60, Stella & Dot (as before)

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The astonishing story of Sophie Blyth’s BIG knickers They don’t get out much these days.

Not since Sophie switched to drinking a2 Milk™. The bloated tummy seemed to just disappear.

Turns out it didn’t like the A1 protein in most regular cows’ milk. So now she can wear underwear that flatters rather than flattens. And have a cuppa without feeling a bit, well…pants.

Sophie shared her story at a2milk.co.uk/ a2tonishing Why not try it yourself?

a2 Milk™ is not suitable for cows’ milk protein allergy. If you have been medically diagnosed with ANY milk intolerance, seek advice from your doctor before use. Customer’s name has been changed to protect her modesty.

fAShIoN Swimsuit, £20, Asos (asos.com); scarf (worn round waist), £175, Sevda London (020 3290 7006 sevdalondon.com); necklace; copper bangle; silver shell ring; silver spike shell ring, all from a selection at F Zeen Retreat (020 7183 5383, uniquekefalonia. com/boutique-hotel); marbleeffect bracelet, £135, Nocturne at Very Exclusive (0344 755 1000, veryexclusive.co.uk); Alexa Arm Candy bracelet, £48.99, Me, Myself & Jonny (memyselfandjonny.co.uk); friendship bracelet, £8 for four, Accessorize (020 3372 3052, accessorize.com)

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fAShIoN

Stylist’s assistant: Sian O’Donnell Photographer’s assistant: James Rees Hair and make-up: Carolyn Wren using Christophe Robin and Urban Decay (carolynwren.co.uk) Model: Tenna at Premier Shot in Lourdas, Kefalonia, Greece Above: Bikini top, £18, Topshop (0344 984 0264, topshop.com); shorts, £95, RI Studio at River Island (0344 576 6444, riverisland. com); pompom leg ties, £6, Boohoo (boohoo. com); sandals, £30, Next (0333 777 8000, next.co.uk); bead necklace, £60, Shh by Sadie (shhbysadie.com); pompom necklace, £15, Portobello Road (portobelloroad.co.uk); silver bangle, £60, Stella & Dot (stelladot. com); Alexa Arm Candy bracelet, £48.99, Me, Myself & Jonny (memyselfandjonny.co.uk); silver shell ring; silver spike shell ring, both from a selection at F Zeen Retreat (020 7183 5383, uniquekefalonia.com/boutique-hotel); friendship bracelet, £8 for four, Accessorize (020 3372 3052, accessorize.com) S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Right: Floral tie-up, £32, Urban Outfitters (urbanoutfitters.com); bikini bottoms (part of a set), £35, Lavish Alice at SilkFred (silkfred.com); espadrilles, £29.99, Zara (0800 030 4238, zara.com); shell necklace (worn as belt), £225, Pebble London (020 7262 1775, pebblelondon. com); bag, £8, Primark (primark.co.uk); copper bangle; silver shell ring; silver spike shell ring, all from a selection at F Zeen Retreat (as before); friendship bracelet, £8 for four, Accessorize (as before) 15

Laura Mulley

Mother earth Give your skin and hair a super-smooth finish with glorious mud treatments

GETTY IMAGES

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aturally rich in minerals such as calcium, zinc and magnesium while being excellent at drawing out impurities, the beautifying properties of clay have been known for centuries.

On a recent trip to Iceland’s Blue Lagoon, I slathered my face in silica mud pulled straight from the bed of that famous geothermal spa pool.

While I’m not sure if it was the clay, the heat of the water or the glass of prosecco I enjoyed while floating around, my face was definitely glowing when I left.

Steaming-hot springs are hard to come by in Britain, but you’ll 16

be able to find your daily dose of the grey stuff much nearer to home.

You’ll most commonly find clay in face mask form (you know, the ones that harden as they dry then crumble as you crack a smile), which are typically suited to oily or blemishprone skin due to their oil-absorbing properties. But the products here prove that everyone can benefit from a good dose of magical mud…

A mask with a difference, Clinique

City Block Purifying Charcoal Clay Mask + Scrub (£29; 0370 034 2566) has the added benefit of exfoliating silica beads for an even deeper clean and soft, refined skin.

Leave it on until it dries and turns

from grey to light blue, then gently massage in the grains. This one’s specifically aimed at unclogging nasties that come with city life, but in reality skin from all corners of the country will love this.

And why stop at the neck?

Create your own relaxing home spa treatment with The Body Shop

Himalayan Charcoal Body Clay (£16; 0800 092 9090), which

draws out toxins from the body as it dries and has a zingy minty scent.

It’s a little messy, so stick to areas prone to congestion, such as the back, chest and upper arms.

BareMinerals’ new range of lotions and potions is as skinfriendly as its mineral make-up.

Clay Chameleon Transforming Purifying Cleanser (£18; 0800 652 3362) is made from Brazilian

red clay, unlike most of the grey ointments here, plus vitamin-rich sea salts, papaya and bamboo.

It turns into a gentle cream when applied with water, making it suitable for all skin types, not just oily.

Afterwards, soak a cotton pad in Fresh Umbrian Clay Purifying S MAGAZINE ★ 24 juLY 2016

Facial Toner (£27; 020 7486 4100) and sweep over the face.

The clay in this one was apparently even used by the ancient Etruscans for its health benefits. Used day and night, it balances the skin and absorbs excess oils without leaving it feeling dry and tight.

It’s another exfoliating face mask, but Marks & Spencer Pure Super

Grape Miracle Glow Clay Mask (£12; 0333 014 8000) is a

glow-getter rather than a heavy decongestant. To Cornish clay, the miracle ingredient of resveratrol has S MAGAZINE ★ 24 jUly 2016

been added, which is an antioxidant, anti-ageing substance extracted from grapes during the production of M&S’s own wines. The perfect excuse to buy another bottle, in my opinion.

Haircare brands have harnessed the powers of clay, too. L’Oréal

Elvive Extraordinary Clay Re-Balancing Shampoo (from £2.99; 0345 070 8090)

addresses a normally troublesome hair issue – oily roots but dry ends.

Three different types of clay in the formula cleverly know where to absorb oil and where to add

Beauty

extra moisture, leaving hair looking healthy, soft and swish-able.

For deeper, once-a-week nourishment, try SenSpa Lava

Clay Hair & Scalp Masque (£6.95; 01590 623551). It’s

made from ingredients including lava or rhassoul clay, found only in the Atlas mountains. It gives the hair and scalp a deep cleanse and an infusion of minerals, plus a gorgeous long-lasting scent thanks to jasmine, cedar and ylang ylang essential oils.

And for seriously scientific skin refinement, try NIOD Flavanone

Mud (£28; 0800 389 8195) from

Victoria Health. It goes on like a face mask but it’s much smarter than that.

It not only sucks out impurities but also “solubilises” them and destroys them for good, rather than keeping them sitting on the skin’s surface. It also creates a shield against pollutants and preserves a healthy dermis.

Expect a tingling sensation for a while afterwards, which is your circulation getting a boost. I take this as a sign that the product is actually doing something, but it’s maybe best avoided for sensitive skins.

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Life as I know it

Laura Trott

Cycling champion Laura, 24, lives in Manchester with her fiancé Jason Kenny Words by Kirsten Jones

Not a lot of people know this but I’m very good at… trampolining. I used to be good as a kid, now maybe not so much. My best friend and I used to do synchronised moves together.

My best friend is… my sister Emma. We had the typical argumentative relationship as kids but as we’ve grown up, we’ve become much closer through cycling together.

My nickname is… Squid. My dad created it but I have no idea what it was about.

The bravest thing I’ve ever done is… compete for my country in front of thousands of people. I don’t see it as brave and it’s part of my job but people tell me it is.

My favourite TV show is… EastEnders. I’m a massive fan. It’s a huge guilty pleasure and I’ve been watching it for years. If I’ve missed an episode, I get so excited to watch it the next day. They keep changing the actors, though – it’s just not the same.

My perfect evening is… Evenings are time for rest after training. I love sitting at home on the sofa with Jason and having a nice meal. Everyone thinks that it’s just the training and the time I spend on my bike that count towards success, but rest is just as important.

I’d like to say sorry to… my mum for being a pain in the bum when I was growing up.

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My first kiss was with… I don’t kiss and tell!

My biggest regret is… I don’t have regrets.

Everything happens for a reason and I learn from my experiences.

The one thing I’d change about myself is…

I don’t think I would change anything. People should feel happy and confident with what they’ve got.

The best thing my parents taught me was… to never give up.

The last time I cried was… at a training session. I give everything but I don’t always have good days – I’m not a robot. If something goes wrong, it does make me sad.

The first record I ever bought was… a NOW CD but I’ve no idea which number. I also got dragged to concerts by my parents and ended up with an obsession with Bruce Springsteen.

My greatest weakness is… the fact that I never give up. I will push myself until I can’t go any more and can get myself in a right mess. I also love chocolate – I think everybody knows that.

If I could pass any law… I would get girls into sport during their lunch breaks.

It’s really important for them to have sporting opportunities. It should be a choice, not a force.

I drive… a Land Rover Discovery Sport.

INTErvIEw

“I want to show girls that you should never give up”

The shop I can’t walk past is… Miss Selfridge.

I’m addicted to all the pastel colours. I also love Mulberry bags, but doesn’t everyone?

The most expensive thing I’ve ever splashed out on is… my bike. Team GB ride Cervélos.

My perfect Sunday is… Sunday is my day off.

I have a lazy morning, eat a cooked breakfast and take the dogs for a walk. I love a Sunday roast, whether it’s from the pub or made at home by Jason.

My favourite place in Britain is… we stayed in an Airbnb in a place called Flash near Buxton.

It was an alpaca farm and we absolutely loved it.

My last holiday was… in Tenerife with my mum and dad. It was absolutely boiling.

I’m currently reading… I’m not a big reader – I like Tv series. My favourite is Nashville.

The best day of my life was… winning a gold medal at the Olympics – it put me into a whole new world. I became a role model to girls and I want to show them that you should never give up.

If I had half an hour left on Earth I’d… spend time with Jason and the dogs. I certainly wouldn’t ride my bike.

Laura is partnering with the Always #LikeAGirl campaign to help girls build and maintain their confidence through puberty, by encouraging them to Keep Playing #LikeAGirl.

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A new leaf

From humble hairdresser to TOWIE celeb, actress, TV presenter and author, Ferne McCann’s star is rising – and she wants more... Simon Button reports

H

aving transitioned from reality star to TV presenter, with a stint in a musical and an autobiography under her belt, Ferne McCann can’t stop pinching herself.

“Well, not literally as it might hurt,” laughs the Essex girl.

For Brentwood-born Ferne, life’s been a whirlwind since she came to fame on The Only Way Is Essex three years ago. Still only 25 years old, her feet haven’t touched the ground. “I can’t believe some of the things I get to do and some of the people I’ve met,” she says, sounding breathless.

Amazingly, Ferne was fairly shy when she was tiny.

“But from around eight onwards I was mad,” she giggles. “There was no one I wouldn’t talk to. When I was 14 I was working in the hairdresser’s every Saturday and every Thursday night and I was having grown-up conversations whilst shampooing people’s hair. I’m very inquisitive and I like to know a lot about people, so it was the perfect job for me.”

As documented on TOWIE, she went on to become a full-time hairdresser. However, the reality show was a stepping stone to greater things. “But it’d be a shame to just dismiss it as that. It was a massive part of my life and I thoroughly enjoyed it. looking back I think, ‘Thanks to TOWIE,’ because I always wanted a TV career and it’s given me that. If it wasn’t for TOWIE I wouldn’t have got I’m A Celebrity... and if it wasn’t for I’m A Celebrity... I wouldn’t have got This Morning. It’s been a snowball effect.”

Ferne says presenting This Morning is a dream job. “But when I started working there I was a nervous wreck,” she laughs. “It was something completely new. you can’t just say, ‘I want to be a dentist,’ and rock up to a dentist’s surgery and just be one – it’s the same with presenting.

“A lot of people say, ‘I want to be a presenter’ but I really had to learn how to be one and This Morning has been an incredible place to do that.

They’re really patient, they have an amazing team and it’s a really happy place to be, but I’ve made loads of mistakes,” Ferne says. “My phone went off

live on air the first week I was doing the show – I’d forgotten it was in my pocket.”

Then there was the time she re-enacted Cruz Beckham performing the Cups song his dad posted on Instagram. “I learned the song, then completely messed it up on air. And I’m always getting people’s names mixed up. I get the one direction boys confused. But that’s the fun of doing live TV; you have to roll with it and think on your feet.”

Ferne doesn’t get starstruck, just nervous, like when she did red-carpet interviews at the Dad’s Army premiere and got a bit giddy about the prospect of interviewing Michael Gambon and Catherine Zeta-jones. “I’ve met everyone from the guys from MasterChef to big Hollywood stars,” she marvels. “It’s crazy.”

Have there been any cringey moments?

“Absolutely! There are moments where I watch myself back and wince, but then there are moments where you just laugh. It’s all part of it.”

Ferne loved being in the jungle in I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!. She, her mum and her sister had been glued to the show since it first started, then suddenly she was there in Australia having the time of her life. “I’m real outdoorsy so I loved being outside, living in a hammock,” says Ferne, who came third. “The trials were difficult but I just did the best I could.”

But there were Twitter trolls to contend with, who commented on her bikini body being bigger than normal. “I didn’t know about it at the time and I was on such a high when I got out of the jungle, nothing could really touch me,” says Ferne. “But it’s not nice and I don’t think it’s fair. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion but it can be hurtful. I’m lucky that I’ve got a great group of friends and an incredible family around me, so I have a great support system. you just have to grow a really thick skin.”

The comments certainly weren’t warranted as she tries to go to the gym at least three times a week and enjoys boxing, spinning, weights and working out with a personal trainer. And she

dAVId oldHAM / ITV / rEx FEATurES

“I’d love an action role, like Wonder Woman.

I want to do everything”

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always seems to be the epitome of glamour – although she disagrees. “oh my God, not at all. last night I was in bed, no make-up on, in my pyjamas, watching TV with a cup of tea. When I’m at home I’m all about wearing comfies, the hair stacked up, really casual. I’m not 100 per cent glam. often, when I’m out and about, you’ll see me being papped with no make-up, in my trainers and my gym gear, but I do love to glam it up as well.”

Ferne is now fronting the CB12 mouthwash and chewing gum Show Stopping Confidence campaign. “For me, confidence is about doing little bits and bobs to make sure when you’re on a night out, at work or wherever it may be that you’re fully prepared and nothing can go wrong.

If you’ve got fresh breath too you’re never going to have any awkward moments.”

For Ferne, whose personality is the key to her success, confidence is also about just being herself. “It’s not about comparing yourself to anyone else,” she says. “There’s only one you so it’s about embracing what you’ve got and working with it. Knowing that and being happy in yourself really gives you that confidence boost.”

But the woman who made her name on reality TV, then the I’m A Celebrity jungle and now This Morning gigs adds: “I’m pretty confident at work too. I thrive off doing things I enjoy. I love my job.

I love presenting on This Morning. I loved doing the Gatsby musical, which was on my list of things to do – I always wanted to do theatre as a child and to get to live that dream was just incredible.”

After playing Myrtle in Gatsby, Ferne hopes to do more acting. “My dream role would be something really gritty, like a Martina Cole thriller or something like Peaky Blinders. That’d be seriously cool. But I’d also love to play a real action role, like Wonder Woman,” Ferne laughs. “I want to do everything.”

Not surprisingly, Ferne doesn’t always find it easy to relax, saying: “I love being busy and I love being in company. I’m dating when I have the time, but I haven’t had a lot of time for that recently.

Her autobiography, Cross My Heart, is out now and she bats away the idea that, at 25, she’s a bit young to be penning her autobiography, pointing out: “It’s just the story so far.”

For more information about CB12’s Show Stopping Confidence Campaign visit cb12.co.uk.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

interview

From top: Ferne in her TOWIE days with co-star Billie Faiers; facing one of the trials on I’m A Celebrity...

Get Me Out of Here!; presenting the Showbiz Gossip slot on This Morning 21

Dreaming Teenagers at the top of their game were destined for sporting glory when their hopes were shattered by illness and injury. Now Paralympians, they have their sights set on success in Brazil – Fiona Duffy meets three inspirational heroes

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GoldEN GIrlS

of Rio S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Even worse, although incredibly rare, I suffered a ‘mirror image’ effect. just six days after the amputation my right ankle felt sprained. To my horror, it followed an identical pattern right down to the colour and temperature changes of skin.

Watching it deteriorate was freaky and terrifying – like déjà vu. Two years later doctors amputated my right leg.

The condition continues to affect what is left of both legs. I’ve had three more amputations over the years and there is very little of either leg now.

Slowly, I realised that staying active took my mind off the constant, gnawing pain. So when a local sailing club set up Sailability for disabled people, I joined. Founder member Eddie Pickering, a paraplegic following an accident as a teenager, needed a racing team-mate. he taught me to sail and live independently again. Together we won the national and world championships – and got engaged. Sadly, Eddie’s health failed and he died in 2012. I miss him terribly, but his legacy lives on.

After reaching the top with sailing, I switched to paracycling. Pushing myself in training and racing flooded my body with endorphins, helping me cope with the unbearable pain.

In 2007 I was spotted by a British cycling disability coach and joined the GB squad. Within just 12 months I became national, then world champion and won olympic gold at Beijing in 2008.

Standing on the podium while the union flag rose and national anthem played was the most incredible feeling. All the blood, sweat and tears shed since the accident rushed through my head in an instant, like my life playing in fast forward. I still get a cheesy grin thinking about it.

I was set to defend my title at the london olympics. But with six weeks to go, while out training, I was hit by a car at 70mph, dislocating my shoulder and cracking a bone in my skull.

Thanks to an incredible physiotherapist I made the starting line and battled excruciating pain to win bronze. It was so hard to see the gold slip away.

But today the bronze actually means more because of what went into it.

Afterwards, my physiotherapist suggested rowing in the gym to strengthen my injured shoulder. The GB Para rowing Squad agreed I showed potential and, after winning trials, I joined the team.

I’m currently silver world medallist and a gold medal at rio de janeiro would be incredible. I’m lucky to have excelled in three different sports and would love my achievements to encourage others to chase goals and dreams, too.

Mine was to be an olympian, but for other people it could be standing on the starting line of the school sports day 100m race or playing in your first match.

Every cloud has a silver lining is one of my favourite sayings. you might not see it at the time but something good always comes out of something bad. If an obstacle gets in the way of your dreams you just have to work around it and get there another way.

I’m living proof that you can get there.”

PhoToGrAPhS: STuArT Wood

“You may not see it at the time, but something good always comes out of something bad”

Twisting her ankle had horrific and life-changing repercussions for teenage sprinting champion Rachel Morris. Although a double amputee, 36-year-old Rachel, of Farnham, Surrey, is now preparing to take part in her third Paralympics.

“As a child I dreamed of being an athlete and would write, ‘I want to win a gold medal at the olympics’ in schoolwork. When the 400m olympic silver medallist roger Black visited my school it made me even more determined.

At 16-plus I was sprinting at county level and at 18 I was representing Great Britain on the track.

And then I twisted my left ankle on a dry ski slope.

It was an innocuous injury but the consequences were huge.

My ankle swelled up painfully and I used crutches to get about. But as weeks passed with no improvement I sensed something wasn’t quite right. The swelling never eased and my leg became hypersensitive. Even a breeze or the lightest brush of fabric against the skin was agonising. It would change colour and temperature, going from red and hot to cold and dark blue.

I’d developed a rare and aggressive condition called reflex sympathetic dystrophy (rdS), now known as Complex regional Pain Syndrome (CrPS), a malfunction of the nervous system that causes extreme pain and inflammation.

Today far more is known about it. The key is prompt physiotherapy. As soon as the pain patterns become ingrained, causing the body to ‘reject’ the limb, it is much harder to treat.

By the time I was getting the right treatment the condition was advanced. damaged circulation led to cracks and ulcers in the skin and my leg literally rotted away. When life-threatening septicaemia developed in 2002 there was no alternative but to amputate from the knee down. losing my leg was hard. Not only did it end my olympic dreams but I felt I’d lost my identity.

I wouldn’t be able to walk, let alone play sport.

And things were about to get worse. I still had horrendous pain from the CrPS and phantom pain from the amputated leg.

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Young footballer Lauren Jones dreamed of playing for England until a fall from a tree left her paralysed. Now 21, Lauren from Worthing, Sussex, is a GB wheelchair tennis champion.

“I have no recollection of the fall that changed my life. It was June 13, 2009, a month before my 14th birthday, and I was climbing a tree with my best friend, Kirstin, on a day out with her family.

I was in high spirits, looking forward to my trials with Brighton & Hove Albion FC two days later.

My dream was to play for England.

From then on memories come in brief flashes. In one I’m lying on my back unable to move, in another there’s a glimpse of light and a deafening noise, which I now know was the air ambulance. My next clear memory is of lying in a hospital bed while a doctor gravely told me I’d never walk again.

As strange as it sounds my first reaction was to laugh. Some nurses were crying and it was all so intense, like a scene from a movie. I honestly thought they were joking.

Then I saw that my parents were crying as well. Looking up at Dad, I asked, ‘Will I be able to go on a plane?’ I’ve no idea why. But it’s ironic, now, considering how much time I spend travelling to competitions.

When it comes to breaking your back I’d done a thorough job.

Normally, patients break the cartilage, spinal cord or bone. I broke all three.

Falling forwards I’d ‘banana-ed’ over a thick branch (my spine literally came out through my back) before falling 20 feet and hitting the ground.

The impact of that split second left me paralysed from the waist down.

When I was left alone and the enormity of it all sank in, I cried. My football dreams were over. But there was never a point where I sulked or wailed, ‘Why me?’ From the word go I was thinking of what I could – rather than what I couldn’t – do.

After six weeks I was transferred from Southampton General Hospital to the spinal unit at Stoke Mandeville Hospital for rehabilitation and physiotherapy. I worked hard, determined to get my life back to as near to normal as it could be.

Between physio sessions I’d screw up bundles of paper and aim them at the wastepaper basket in the corner of the room. Eventually, amused 24

“David Beckham sent me a signed shirt saying ‘stay strong’”

GoldEN GIrlS nurses fashioned a basketball net from a drip stand for me to use.

As well as relieving boredom the exercise helped reactivate my core muscles and built upper body strength. doctors were impressed at how quickly I progressed. After mastering sitting up, eating and getting dressed, I learned how to get around in a wheelchair, manoeuvring up and down kerbs.

A huge part of rehab revolved around being active and within three months I was playing wheelchair sports like basketball and table tennis. Physiotherapists told me I had potential and arranged for me to attend a Paralympics trial day. others nudged me towards wheelchair football, but I liked the idea of developing my own style and techniques with wheelchair tennis, which is played in manual, rather than electric chairs.

I quickly discovered you needed far more than good hand-eye co-ordination. I was up against people who had been disabled since birth and who had developed brilliant wheelchair skills.

I was overwhelmed to learn that my football team had started fundraising after the accident, with star players sending shirts to be auctioned. The whole community became involved, raising £40,000 for physio, a specialised wheelchair and tennis lessons. david Beckham sent me a signed shirt saying ‘stay strong’.

Early in 2010, while on a training camp, I was spotted by a Team GB coach. just 12 months later I was national junior girls’ champion and finished 2011 with my first national senior doubles title.

After becoming world junior singles number one and world champion in the World Team Cup I turned professional. I compete all over the world for Great Britain and travel with an assistance dog called Koda.

Back at home I’m an ambassador for Sussex Tennis and also support spinal patients at Stoke Mandeville.

Earlier this year I broke my hip falling out of my wheelchair but I’m back competing and hope to make the team for the rio Paralympics.

Winning a medal for Great Britain would be a dream come true.”

Lauren’s sponsors include Tennis Sussex (LTA), the Tennis Foundation and Pets Corner.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

GoldEN GIrlS

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

“Inspiring others to realise their dreams is most important for me”

I’ve learned MS hates extremes of temperature, stress, anger and negativity and immediately worsens under those conditions. The best way of keeping it ‘happy’ was to stay well, follow a healthy diet, take regular exercise and think positively. It’s still with me every day but I’m able to manage it.

As my confidence came back I began to teach swimming at the local pool. Adrian was one of my pupils and we fell head over heels in love.

He suggested I competed again.

I’d laughed off the suggestion, insisting I was too old and fat, but he kept encouraging. Gradually, I realised he was right.

I worried about coming off the MS drugs but knew I had to do this on my own. After 10 years, I started training again. I was aiming for london 2012 so was staggered to qualify for the Beijing olympics 2008 just weeks later.

I didn’t win any medals but it was a dream to be competing and representing Great Britain again, supported by my family. The icing on the cake was when Adrian proposed on the Great Wall of China.

At the london Paralympics I won four silver and one bronze – more medals than any other GB athlete. At the time it was a huge disappointment that none of them were gold, until people told me how inspiring my performance had been.

Adrian and I married in 2013 and in that same year I won four world champion titles in Montreal.

Now I’m looking forward to my third Paralympic Games in rio. Swimming keeps me so well I’d like to be still racing when I’m 80.

A gold medal would be a dream come true. But inspiring others to chase and realise their dreams is still the most important thing for me. At 34, I feel I’ve lived three lives and it is hard to believe I’m the same person. Those early years with MS were horrendous but they’ve taught me valuable lessons and made me a better person. I honestly think that is why I was given MS – to lose that easy, perfect life and become stronger and kinder.

I’ve heard there’s another athlete with MS in the Paralympics this year. I hope it was me who inspired her.”

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STEPHANIE’S AuToBIoGrAPHy PAyING THE PrICE IS AvAIlABlE FroM STEPHANIEMIllWArd.CoM, £11.99

Stephanie Millward’s dreams of swimming for England at the Sydney Olympics were shattered when, at the age of 17, she was found to be suffering from multiple sclerosis.

Now, 34-year-old Stephanie is in training for her third Paralympics. She lives in Box, Wiltshire, with her husband, Adrian, 50. “until I was diagnosed with MS my life was perfect.

My talent for swimming had been spotted and developed at a young age. At 15, I became English schools’ swimming champion and national age group champion, breaking records both times, and began training with the GB olympic team.

The following year I was selected to swim for England in World Cup meetings abroad. The olympics in Sydney 2000 was a dead cert.

Then, while competing in China in 1998, I began to feel nauseous and wobbly and a ‘bounce’ in my vision left me tripping over and walking unsteadily. I was favourite to win the race – but came eighth.

I then developed a pain down my left side, as if my body was trying to break through too-tight skin.

When an MrI scan showed swelling and scarring on the brain doctors said it was either an infection, lupus or multiple sclerosis. I’d never heard of the last two conditions and insisted I was fine. I’d still go to the olympics. But my condition worsened.

I’d swim into the pool wall while training and was too weak to climb out afterwards.

Four days after my 18th birthday, in September 1999, doctors confirmed I had the relapsing remitting form of MS, an autoimmune condition of the central nervous system. Nerves in my brain and spinal cord had become damaged, disrupting the transfer of signals to the rest of the body.

Symptoms vary from person to person and usually wax and wane. But mine were continuous and even doctors were shocked at my deterioration.

I was in constant pain, struggled to walk, talk, see and move, with terrifying spells of blindness and complete paralysis.

After failing my A levels and losing my university place, I survived on disability benefits. I couldn’t bear to watch coverage of the 2000 olympics.

Consumed by anger and rage, I sank into depression, drank excessively and self-harmed.

I believed that I had done something wrong and this awful illness was my punishment.

Steroid treatment made little difference and I had to fight for a treatment which finally brought the symptoms under control after four horrendous years.

In 2005, Mum suggested swimming would help with my weight issues – I’d gone from a size eight to 18 – and helped me into the pool. on land I could barely function but in water it was like coming home. I continued to swim and, with the help of a personal trainer, learned to walk independently. I also took up tae kwon do, which improved my balance and core strength.

Anger management calmed me and with holistic therapy, like reiki, I learned to accept rather than battle the MS. It was a part of me for life and I could either make it my friend or my enemy.

Victoria is put through her paces on the Equicizer by former professional jockey John Reid and (above) Victoria in her racing silks with mentor Hayley Turner and Taxi

PHoToGrAPHS: HAMISH MITCHEll

O

n Thursday I will be pulling on my riding boots to compete in the prestigious Magnolia Cup on ladies’ Day at Qatar Goodwood Festival. The Magnolia Cup, now in its sixth year, is a women’s charity horse race ridden over five-and-a-half furlongs (about half a mile) on the beautiful, yet challenging, Goodwood racecourse in the heart of West Sussex.

This year the riders chosen to compete are all professional women in an array of occupations from banking to fashion. But we all share one passion – horses. We aim to raise money and awareness for Goodwood’s chosen charities, World Vision and Best Beginnings.

The charity race is the inspiration of the Goodwood team and over the past five years it has raised an incredible £1 million for worthy causes. And beauty brand Dove, which is supporting me, has made

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me its ambassador for real women – no pressure then.

Each jockey will be sporting bespoke silks designed by high-profile women fashion designers, including Amanda Wakeley, Beulah and jasmine Guinness. Mine have been created by the doyenne of British fashion, Vivienne Westwood, and feature pink and yellow roses on a beautiful turquoise background.

But don’t be fooled into thinking this is a mere frivolous fashion parade. Project Runway it is not.

Although I competed in last year’s race and know what to expect, getting fit enough to take part is as difficult as ever, and the nerves and adrenaline around riding a racehorse never subside. Horse racing is an extreme and dangerous sport and my desk-based job and weekend pony rides were not going to help me get into physical shape this year.

All aspiring jockeys must pass a gruelling fitness and riding

Bla zing Sporting designer silks, S Magazine’s Victoria Gray gears up for the ride of her life assessment at the British racing School in Newmarket, Suffolk, to ensure we possess the strength and skill to hold ourselves safely on a racehorse. Senior jockey coach richard Perham, whose long and illustrious career has seen him ride winners for top owners, including the Queen, explains what we are letting ourselves in for.

“This will probably be the most exhausting thing you have ever done in your life,” he warns. We will be riding in front of a crowd of between 35,000 and 40,000 spectators and although our race will last for only about 75 seconds, we could be travelling at speeds of up to 40 miles an hour.

If that is not enough to make our

blood run cold, we must also master the Goodwood pull up. The racecourse ends rather abruptly and past years have seen a couple of amateur jockeys fall off.

Fitness is a hugely important part of riding a racehorse and without incredible strength around your core you simply can’t stay in the saddle.

My personal trainer, logan Phillips, an award-winning judo competitor, is on hand to put me through my paces in the gym and push me through the pain barrier with a three-minute plank and several sets of agonising squats.

Next on the agenda was to find a racehorse trainer. Thankfully, Natalie lloyd-Beavis, who is based in the Berkshire village of East Garston, was prepared to take me on as S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

lIFESTylE

And she’s off… Victoria on Tax Return takes on jockey Ryan Clark as she trains for her Goodwood race Right: Victoria and new friend Taxi

a trail a pupil to improve my riding and get me ready for the challenge. Natalie has worked with horses most of her life and has been training racehorses for the last six years. She has 13 horses at her yard and each has a tailor-made training programme.

“I like to get to know a horse and figure out what makes it tick. This ultimately will produce the best results,” she explains.

Riding a thoroughbred racehorse is a completely different discipline from any other equestrian sport. These horses are incredibly sensitive, yet extremely powerful, and as a jockey it is all about learning the technique needed to stay in the saddle.

Natalie introduces me to Tax Reform – Taxi to his friends – a six-year-old beautiful bay gelding with a white star on his forehead.

His owner, Michael Baldry, has given permission for me to ride him in the race. So it is time to get to know him.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

“He’s a gentleman and knows his job,” Natalie says. My first ride on Taxi also proves he’s fast – very fast.

Six weeks before my race, Goodwood announces that Hayley Turner OBE, the most successful female jockey in the history of British racing, is the Magnolia Cup ambassador and our mentor. Hayley has clocked up 764 career wins, including three Group One – the highest level of stakes races – successes. She is racing royalty, so this is like David Beckham agreeing to coach the local five-a-side team.

With fellow Magnolia Cup riders Shadi Halliwell, group marketing and creative director at Harvey Nichols, and Emily Baxendale, creative director and founder of Emily-london milliners, we meet Hayley in the historic racing village of lambourn at Oaksey House, the Injured jockeys Fund centre that helps with the rehabilitation and fitness training

of riders after illness or injury.

Here, Hayley coaches us on the Equicizer, a mechanical horse designed to improve our race riding positions. john Reid, a derby-winning jockey, is also on hand to help us perfect the short-stirrupped stance.

After an exhausting session Hayley suggests we form a WhatsApp group to keep in touch with each other and where she will be on hand to answer questions and give advice and tips.

Although we are all competitive and have, I’m sure, imagined holding the Magnolia Cup aloft, there is a strong sense of camaraderie among us.

We all have extremely demanding full-time jobs and have to fit the riding and fitness training around working hours, which means very early mornings and late nights. But the exhilaration of riding a thoroughbred is completely addictive and nothing prepares you for a busy day at work like a 6am blast up the gallops. Our

WhatsApp group pings with advice and suggestions from Hayley about gym exercises – and the excitement and nerves begin to mount.

Dove has sponsored Tax Reform for the race and I discover he will be renamed for the day as The One Hundred Coloured Horse in honour of the company’s Self-esteem Project, aimed at helping women to become more confident.

So on Thursday, after a good night’s sleep, following the ultimate training session and kitted out in my beautiful silks, all I need do is stay in the saddle and ride like the wind.

Support World Vision and Best Beginnings by visiting justgiving.com/ fundraising/gloriousgoodwood magnoliacupladiesrace and bestbeginnings.org.uk/fundraisers/ qatar-goodwood-the-magnolia-cupladies-race-2016-1028. For information, visit goodwood.com.

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Mini marvels

With treasures at home and in Europe, you don’t need to travel far and wide, as our writers show

Liverpool The grand buildings that line the streets from the docks reflect liverpool’s past wealth and you can see why English Heritage has described it as the country’s finest Victorian city.

Even though trade has diminished hugely, the docks and the Mersey are liverpool’s lifeblood and there’s still a huge buzz here. We took the ferry across on a very blustery day and the bursts of Gerry and the Pacemakers warmed the cockles. yes, it’s cheesy, but what the hell...

We stopped at the Albert Dock, home to Tate liverpool, the Merseyside Maritime Museum and International Slavery Museum. The latter two are well worth visiting, providing a fascinating insight into the city’s history and the melting pot of comings and goings. Even better, entry is free.

We also spent hours at the Walker Art Gallery – an architectural gem with art works from lucian Freud to David Hockney. It’s also free to visit. liverpool is really easy to walk around, so after the morning’s art and culture, we headed to Hope Street, home to the city’s coolest restaurants and bars and beautiful Georgian buildings. The street links the Anglican Cathedral and the Catholic Metropolitan Cathedral, which celebrates its 50th birthday next year. Both are hugely different in style – the Anglican a lofty behemoth of a building versus the “modern” Catholic one, yet both offer peace and tranquillity.

We also visited that other place of worship in liverpool – Anfield. The tour of the stadium is fantastic, even if you aren’t a football fan. The ground is undergoing a revamp with 13,000 extra seats and the tour guides were funny and passionate about the Klopp effect on The Kop. With tours done and feet aching, we retreated

to the city’s Titanic Hotel – a former warehouse at the Stanley Dock and the first part of a major multi-million pound investment. The area has a real grittiness and attitude, but I love that about it. The hulks of buildings here are being put to good use as music studios and used as film and TV locations. Peaky Blinders fans take note.

The hotel rooms are enormous with metal pillars and steel girders. The bar and restaurant overlook a waterway and at night-time, it comes alive with a fantastic three-course menu for £25.

The hotel is a good 20-minute walk from the iconic liver Building, but it’s a key destination for clients such as the Borussia Dortmund team and the Southampton FC squad, who brought along their own masseurs.

We, however, visited the Maya Blue Spa in the bowels of the hotel. It has five treatment rooms, a small hydrotherapy pool, steam room and sauna and my deluxe facial was totally unique. With a seaweed poultice mask and seaweed leaves, the maritime theme just kept on going…

Margaret Hussey

The iconic Liverpool skyline from the Mersey and (above right) the Titanic Hotel Liverpool

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A three-course meal and one-night stay at Titanic Hotel Liverpool costs £145 per couple, Sunday to Thursday. The deluxe facial lasts 90 minutes and costs £105. For more details, call 0151 559 1444 or visit titanichotelliverpool.com.

Single fares from London to Liverpool start at £15.

For more details, call 08719 774222 or visit virgintrains.co.uk.

The pool at Purobeach and (below right) the exotic garden view from the Kempinski Bahía Hotel

Marbella, Spain Forget the recent association with fake tans and Essex accents; Marbella has long been a favourite Brit hot spot. More than 300,000 live here and the appeal is obvious. Marbella has over 300 sunny days a year, hip beach clubs and fine food, washed down with Andalusian charm.

My latest visit to this part of the Costa del Sol brought me to the five-star Kempinski Bahía Hotel, located two miles east of the coastal town of Estepona and around 15 minutes drive from the diamonds and dramas of Puerto Banus and Marbella’s golden mile.

Arriving at the hotel’s vast reception area, we were met with a warm greeting by staff who were exceptional throughout our whole stay. After speedily dropping off our luggage we were lured to the hotel’s lush sub-tropical gardens and swimming pools. Here, with piña coladas in hand and soaking up a temperature of 28°C, we dreamily watched a wedding then took a siesta that was discreetly interrupted by the pool attendants at 7pm. Pure relaxation and no signs of our hectic london lifestyle – a good start.

Meanwhile, waiting patiently back at our room were tempting afternoon cakes and a balcony with a sea view to die for.

The hotel has an impressive 132 rooms and 15 luxury suites, all with views of their exotic gardens and the sea. Even in high season and at full capacity the hotel still feels calm and intimate.

The Kempinski Bahía is, as its name suggests, a beach hotel, which means you have the best of both worlds: lying by the pool while watching the waves lap up on the shore.

If you’re the kind of person who’s longing for beach vibes combined with chilled Balearic tunes, the Purobeach Marbella has the answer. It’s a beach club with white beds that immaculately line the pool and rows of palm trees complementing the views of Gibraltar and the mountains of Morocco. We took no time slipping off our wedges and taking the two-minute walk from the hotel along the golden sand to this beautiful luxurious haven.

Purobeach is one of the classier beach clubs of Marbella – with its own coordinates for anchoring S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

TRAVEl Bergerac, Dordogne

yachts on its menu. We enjoyed a super-relaxing time people-watching: families, young couples, older ones and groups of friends – a rich tapestry.

During our day we were presented with thoughtful little treats that made the experience even more special, such as sorbets to refresh the palate ready for the next strawberry mojito, ice-cold towels to keep the cool people even cooler and tiny bottles of aftersun to take away.

The restaurant at Purobeach is superb. It serves all kinds of beautiful food all day, from sushi to steak, and gets crazily busy, so booking early is advised. I’m still dreaming of their hot duck sushi rolls and the beautiful goat’s cheese salad.

From mid-day to late evening staff at Purobeach are paying attention to every detail, servicing you with cocktails, straightening your bed towels and generally making you feel like a superstar.

Obviously, there are many other pleasures to experience in Marbella: some of the best golf courses in the world, horse riding in the Sierra Nevada, and there’s shopping in the stunning Plaza de los Naranjos or Orange Square.

But my time here was limited, so on this trip I chose to stay close to the beach and channel my inner ursula Andress.

Sarah White

Overlooking the grounds of the Château des Vigiers, from my terrace, I felt to the manor born.

It’s not every day you stay in a French château so I lapped up the grandeur of the 16th-century stately pile, set among acres of vineyards.

After trying out the luxurious freestanding bath with lots of bubbles, I was off to meet my friends at the brasserie to sample the local wines and duck, which is a local delicacy.

We had flown in earlier from london City airport to Bergerac, which is the perfect base to explore the Dordogne on a short break. The flight is one hour 35 minutes and you get from airside to kerbside in 15 minutes.

While the loire may be famed for its châteaux, the Dordogne has its own gems. Billionaire Abram Abramovitch thinks so – he has one as a holiday home.

But my favourite château was the Château de Bridoire, a medieval castle dating from the 15th century in the heart of the vineyards of Monbazillac. The vaulted kitchen with rows of brass pans and the king’s room and chapel are highlights but it’s also a treasure trove of old-fashioned games. They’re there for all to try both indoors and outside, from chess and crossbow shooting to boules and the goose game. We girls got a tad competitive and I turned out to be a champ at skittles.

While much of the Dordogne is sleepy, the medieval town of Sarlat is a honeypot for tourists, especially the Saturday market.

I loved the hustle and bustle of the colourful

market with its displays of local cheeses, wines, duck, foie gras and strawberries.

Another popular tourist spot is the gardens of Marqueyssac, which has more than six kilometres of paths, edged with 150,000 boxwoods aged more than 100 years old. until you see the splendour of the symmetry and shapes, it would be hard to imagine just how beautiful boxwood can be. The park offers panoramic views of the Dordogne valley, too.

While enjoying a lunch of salad and walnut tart on the terrace there was another treat in store as the resident peacocks came to join us, showing off their iridescent plumage.

From the gorgeous Marqueyssac, we travelled through the Vézère Valley, which is a wealth of prehistoric sites. We headed for the most extraordinary of grottoes, the lascaux cave, which has prehistoric paintings of wild animals depicted in vivid colours.

The story of their discovery is the stuff of dreams. In 1940, four boys were out with their dog when the pooch ran off, disappearing down a hole. Happily, the dog was rescued and an underground cave with paintings was unearthed.

Because human breath damages the paintings, a replica of the main section has been painstakingly reproduced for the public to see.

Though they are replicas, they feel so authentic and proved the highlight of the trip.

In December, a new complex is opening at lascaux and we all agreed it was the perfect excuse for a return visit.

Jan Brierley British Airways has a new summer-only service from London City to Bergerac with four flights a week until September. Each-way hand baggage fares cost £57, based on a return journey.

Book at ba.com/londoncity. Prices at the Château des Vigiers (vigiers.com) start at £105 per room per night. At hotel Mercure Perigueux Centre (mercure.com), prices start at £68 for a double room. For information about the Dordogne, visit enjoydordogne.co.uk.

The bustling market at Sarlet and (above left) Château Monbazillac set amongst attractive vineyards

Rooms at Kempinski Bahia Hotel start at £233 per night for a deluxe room. For more details, visit kempinski.com/en/marbella/hotel-bahia. For more information on Purobeach, visit purobeach.com/ purobeach/purobeach-marbella.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

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In the closet with

Kate Thornton The TV presenter loves to bling up her look for glam events but goes casual at home Words and styling

by Tricia Welch Kate, 43, was the first presenter of The X Factor and has also presented This Morning, Loose Women and the live Strictly Come Dancing tours. She is currently fronting new shopping platform TBSeen. Kate lives in south london with her son Ben, eight.

How would you describe your style? Random. As a working mum I’m led by comfort and anything labelled “dry clean” seems like too much work. First thing, I put on my work-out clothes for my run after dropping off my son at school. Then I dress for work, but as soon as I get home I take off my professional togs and put on something comfy, preferably with an elasticated waist.

Which colours and shapes suit you best? I’ve never been skinny – I wouldn’t want to be – and have a womanly figure. My shape has changed through the years, and my style with it – my days of wearing white jeans are long gone. Now, I like to emphasise my waist, but not my legs. As for colour, black and white is my go-to but I also love bright-red and I’m partial to a bit of animal print and a bold shoe.

Do you prefer to be underdressed than overdressed? yes – and my everyday wardrobe reflects that. But I do have some fabulous evening gowns for my TV and arena work, 32

“Vintage doesn’t work for me.

I just look like Pat Butcher”

“I feel like Jessica Rabbit in this dress,” says Kate about this red sequin gown by Rachel Gilbert, which she first wore to host one of the Strictly Come Dancing tours. “It clings in all the right places.”

Teamed with black high heels from Office

which I love. I hosted the Strictly Come Dancing tours for five years, and got to wear the most spectacular outfits.

Because of that I’ve never felt I missed out on an amazing wedding day gown – I had it through work.

What is your favourite fashion era? The 60s. Hemlines went up, inhibitions went out the door and creativity ruled. It was such a game-changer. The freedom we have in fashion now is a result of that.

What are your favourite highstreet brands? All of them. But I’m an online girl. I do my shopping at 9pm with a glass of wine in one hand and my laptop in the other. Which is how I got involved with TBseen.com.

It’s all about buying the brands you already love, plus some you haven’t heard of yet. Not just fashion but groceries, holidays, even your utility bills. you can buy everything for a great discount, plus get money back – an average of five per cent – on everything you buy. It’s a no-brainer.

Who is your favourite designer?

I’m not a designer shopper, but if money were no object it would be Roland Mouret because he knows how to carve an amazing silhouette.

Do you have a style icon? Christy Turlington, Cindy Crawford and Helena Christensen, the original supermodels.

They were healthy women with curves. What happened? Now it’s all about size zero. Why would anyone aspire to nothing? I just don’t get it.

What is your best beauty secret?

As you get older, when it comes to make-up, less is definitely more.

Get as much sleep as you can, and drink more water, to stop your skin feeling like a dried-out raisin.

Do you like vintage? It doesn’t work for me. I just look like Pat Butcher.

How many shoes and handbags do you own? An embarrassing amount. Over 20 bags, at least 20 pairs of trainers and more shoes.

What is the best piece of fashion advice you have ever been given?

Don’t be led by fashion but by what works for you. you don’t know that until you are at least in your thirties.

What is your current favourite outfit? My Kooples blazer and skinny trousers. I wore them for the ad campaign for TBseen.com and got a discount. I’m always looking for a deal.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

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Above left: This black jacket with cummerbund by Alexander McQueen is a favourite Kate wore when she presented The X Factor.

Her silver shoes are by Gina Above: Kate is a fan of monochrome and animal prints.

This black-and-white top is from Topshop and the black and white dress by Brave Soul is a recent £12.99 bargain from TK Maxx Left: Kate bought this zebra-print jumpsuit on holiday in Ibiza. It’s pictured here with Tom Ford sunglasses and her favourite fragrance, Jo Loves Pomelo

by Jo Malone Right: This smiley T-shirt from Boxpark in Shoreditch, east London, was a sales bargain Below: Kate’s go-to everyday bag is this leather duffle from Asos, shown here with Adidas trainers

Above: Kate models a jacket and trousers from The Kooples.

Her animal-print top is from Equipment and the heels are from Office Far left: Mainly a fan of black and white, Kate also loves red.

“It’s a good colour for blondes,” she says. This dress

by Pinko was an airport buy

To sign up for cash back deals on your shopping go to TBSeen.com.

34

s MaG MaGaZinE nE ★ 24 JULY 2016

PhotoGraPhs: GEMMa DaY / hair anD MakE-UP: JULia WaDE

Is there an old favourite you turn to in a wardrobe crisis? if in doubt, jeans, a well-cut jacket, a rollneck and boots, preferably all black.

How much do you spend on clothes each month? not a lot. a couple of hundred quid. the last dress i bought cost £12.99.

What is the most expensive item in your wardrobe? a designer handbag i bought from sharon osbourne – she has clothes sales to raise money for charity. i nearly bought a Balenciaga motorcycle handbag at the end of the first season of The X Factor, but i felt so guilty i took it back. i figured i could put two children in africa through school for a year for the same money, so i did that instead.

What is the best fashion gift you have ever been given? Years ago, Madonna hired me to host the launch of her album Music at Brixton academy. the set was designed by Dolce & Gabbana and Madonna wanted me to wear their clothes. so i went to the store and Domenico Dolce and stefano Gabbana were there, and after i’d chosen an outfit they gave me more options plus a bag and coat too. then, at the end of the gig, they insisted i kept it all. how good is that?

Have you a favourite little black dress? a simple shift dress from Jaeger, which i’ve had for seven years and still looks great.

What item of clothing could you not live without? My school run/football sidelines Canada Goose jacket – when you’re standing there for 90 minutes you need to be warm as toast.

What is your favourite piece of jewellery? i don’t really have a favourite, not since the engagement ring and eternity ring that Ben’s dad bought me were stolen. nowadays, i tend to wear costume jewellery.

What item of clothing would you save from a burning house? i would save the pyjamas my son wore after he was born. he was premature and tiny, just 5lbs. funnily enough i was at my mum’s the other day and found a teeny matinee jacket of his that she’d kept. Like me, she would never let it go.

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Beautiful

Jane O’Gorman

Our agony aunt gets to the heart of your relationship problems

His treats make me feel obliged There’s no escaping the fact that my new partner earns a lot more than I me. I’m more than happy for him to pay for meals and buy me gifts, but I feel very uncomfortable every time he puts money directly into my account for “a treat”. It feels like I’m being bought. Three times now, I’ve gone to the cash machine and discovered that large amounts (£250, £300 and £200) have been secretly deposited. Of

Can I really trust my elusive boyfriend?

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My boyfriend doesn’t like to be questioned or tracked. He kicks off if I dare to keep tabs on him or ask him where he’s been. He likes to think of himself as a free spirit, which is all very well, but I’m the one left behind worrying about where he is. He says I can trust him and that he’ll never let me down, but how can I be expected to relax when I don’t know where he is half the time? you’re entitled to have your say. If you don’t like the way your mysterious boyfriend behaves and treats you, then why should you sit on your

course I always thank him and tell him that he doesn’t have to do this, but it’s becoming a habit.

It also means I feel obliged to do certain things (in bed and out of it) that he wants. I accept that he’s probably trying to be generous and kind, but this is just not my style. How do I express this without sounding ungrateful?

I worry that your partner is a manipulative individual who

hands and keep quiet? I accept that life is tough and that we all need to work hard, but why can’t he send a simple text if he’s going to be away for hours or even days? Does he have someone else or something to hide?

Tell him that you have to know where you stand because his inconsiderate behaviour is causing stress.

Dad’s new wife just ignores my children

My father’s new wife isn’t interested in my kids. Her daughter, from a previous relationship, has a son who is her world. When she comes to my home, she totally ignores my three children and spends

Sex matters I know that people of a certain age invariably carry emotional baggage and realise my man had dated and lived with several women when we first started dating. But I didn’t expect him to brag about his old flames.

We went to my parents’ for lunch and he spent ages talking about the many women he’d loved and lost. I was embarrassed and my parents were furious. He also brags about his sex life when he’s had a few drinks and we’re with friends. How do I quash this habit?

Clearly this man is very proud of his sexual prowess and considers himself as something of a stud and a player. Where does that leave you? Are you simply another notch on his bedpost? Another name along the way? Perhaps you should ask him precisely what you mean to him at this stage of his life.

My take is that life is too precious to be thrown away on someone who isn’t completely right or totally respectful. I suspect your parents and friends believe that you could do a lot better for yourself and I’m inclined to agree.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

JANE’S BRAND-NEW ADvIcE LINES knows exactly what he’s doing.

By depositing cash directly into your account, he instantly makes you beholden to him. In my mind, he crossed a line the day he went into your personal belongings to find out your bank account details.

Now he has the upper hand and you suddenly find yourself out of your comfort zone. tell him today that this practice has to stop. unless he can understand and respect the fact that you have certain boundaries, you and he may not have a long-term future together. then state that you intend to pay back every single penny – and make sure that you do. this is about respect.

Do you have a sexual or emotional problem? Need to improve your relationship or sex life? Call these new phonelines for jane o’Gorman’s friendly, expert advice.

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hours gushing about how advanced her grandson is.

I just find this so rude. I’ve no idea if my father notices, but I certainly do. How do I broach this without blowing my top? you describe this lady as your father’s new wife, therefore resist the urge to say anything until you’ve all got to know each other a lot more and things have settled down. Maybe she and your father could have your children to stay in order to get to know each other better. ultimately, you may just have to have “the chat” in

% 0905 789 3419*

* Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s network access charge and last approximately four minutes.

If you would like to have a problem answered by Jane, text SMAGJANE followed by a brief explanation of your problem to 87080. texts cost 50p plus your standard network rate.

SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390. Please note that jane cannot respond to individual messages and not all problems will be published.

order to clear the air and let your feelings be known. Whatever you do, don’t criticise her to your father because he may then feel he has to choose between you – and you could end up the loser.

Thinking ahead

Contact Jane at S Magazine, Fourth Floor, Northern & Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN or email jane.ogorman@express.co.uk. Jane regrets that she cannot reply personally to your letters.

Doctor, doctor

PhotoGrAPh: rCD1

Dr Rosemary Leonard MBE is a GP with many years’ experience working in London’s top teaching hospitals

The joints on my fingers have become larger and are sometimes stiff in the morning, but otherwise don’t hurt. I managed to get my engagement ring off a while ago, but can’t get it back on, and my wedding ring is stuck. Should I get it cut off and enlarged or will the swelling go down?

I’m in my mid-fifties.

It sounds like osteoarthritis and the swelling is due to deformity

of the ends of the bones. unfortunately, this is usually permanent, so it’s unlikely your fingers will return to their previous shape. your doctor can confirm this and if so, I suggest that you get your wedding ring cut off and both rings enlarged to slide over the joint. If they are too big for the base of your finger, as is often the case, a good jeweller can fit sizing beads to stop them swinging round your finger.

Contact Dr Leonard at S Magazine, Sunday Express, Fourth Floor, Northern and Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN, or email dr.leonard@express.co.uk. Dr Leonard regrets that she cannot reply personally to letters. Read her column every Tuesday in the Daily Express.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

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S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Bright & breezy

Freshen up your outside space with colourful accessories and chic furniture, says Victoria Gray

Harlequin’s bright and beautiful Fauvisimo collection of fabrics is inspired by the vibrant colours and bold brushstrokes of the early 20th century’s Fauvist art movement and features pretty birds, flowers and landscapes. Prices start at £57 per square metre for the fabric and the cushions cost £70 each (0845 123 6815, harlequin.uk.com) 40

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

INtErIorS

Clockwise, from top left: Add a touch of style with Marks & Spencer’s bronzecoloured Jaipur platter, £25, and set of three posy vases in grey, clear and blue, which costs £12 (0333 014 8000, marksandspencer.com) Get some outside edge with this blow-the-budget Kumo garden sofa designed by Lionel Doyen for Manutti, which costs £11,810 from Go Modern. The comfortable collection takes its name from the Japanese word for “cloud”. The modular sofa has adjustable and removable armrests and backrests, allowing you to transform part of the sofa into a single chair or sun lounger (020 7731 9540, gomodern.co.uk) This Orseno dining furniture set includes a round table with a removable lazy Susan plate and three surrounding curved benches that can seat up to 12 people. The aluminium frame is woven with an all-weather rattan, making it ideal for outdoor use. It costs £3,500 from Oka (0844 815 7380, oka.com) Made from hard-wearing jute and coloured with vegetable dyes, Cuckooland’s indoor-outdoor rug is as eco-friendly as it is eye-catching and costs £355 (01305 231231, cuckooland.com)

COMPETITION

ENtrANtS MuSt bE 18 or ovEr. thE CoMpEtItIoN CloSES At MIDNIGht oN july 30 AND thrEE worKING DAyS lAtEr for poStAl ENtrIES. wINNErS wIll bE SElECtED At rANDoM froM All vAlID ENtrIES. thE EDItor’S DECISIoN IS fINAl. for full tErMS AND CoNDItIoNS, SEE ExprESS.Co.uK/CoMprulES. by rESpoNDING to proMotIoNS, offErS AND CoMpEtItIoNS you AGrEE thAt NorthErN & ShEll AND S MAGAZINE MAy CoNtACt you by poSt, SMS AND/or EMAIl wIth offErS, GooDS or SErvICES thAt MAy bE of INtErESt to you. to Stop rECEIvING SMS MESSAGES, plEASE tExt “NS NoINfo” to thE orIGINAtING NuMbEr. ExprESS NEwSpApErS/NorthErN & ShEll rESErvES thE rIGht to offEr thESE proMotIoNS IN ItS portfolIo of tItlES. prIZES ArE SubjECt to AvAIlAbIlIty. IMAGES ArE for rEprESENtAtIoNAl uSE oNly. Sp: SpoKE – 0333 202 3390.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

one reader will win this rattaneffect lA Kingston corner garden dining unit, worth £1,350 from Debenhams. Call 0344 800 8877 or see debenhams.com.

Call 0905 789 3471 (80ppm)* or text SMAGDEBEN followed by your email address, name and address to 86660 (£2)**. *Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s network access charge and last 2.5 minutes. **Texts cost £2 plus your usual network rate. Or to enter by post, send your name, address, phone number, email address, age and gender in a sealed envelope to: Debenhams Furniture Competition, PO Box 12581, Sutton Coldfield B73 9BX. One entry per letter.

41

The essence of summer Savour the flavour of sweets enhanced with the subtle taste of vanilla

Styling by Victoria Gray Photographs by Winfried Heinze Vanilla ice cream

Keep your cool with the classic taste of vanilla ice cream 42

Preparation time: 45 minutes plus 3-4 hours’ chilling Makes 1 tub 4 free-range egg yolks 1 tbsp Nielsen-Massey vanilla bean paste 570ml (1 pint) whole milk 50g (1¾oz) skimmed milk powder 90g (3¼fl oz) unrefined golden caster sugar l Place the egg yolks into a bowl with the vanilla bean paste. l Pour the milk into a large pan then add the skimmed milk powder and 2 teaspoons of sugar. l Bring to the boil then turn the heat down and simmer for 5 minutes. Take off the heat, cover and leave for 20 minutes to infuse. l Add the rest of the sugar to the egg yolks and whisk with an electric whisk until pale and thick. l Pour the egg and sugar mixture over the milk mixture, beating all the time, ensuring it’s well mixed. Heat slowly, stirring continuously, until the custard thickens. But be very careful not to boil it as you will scramble the eggs. l Take off the heat and cool.

Chill in the fridge for 3-4 hours. l Churn in an ice cream maker until frozen. Alternatively, pour into a container and place in the freezer, mixing a couple of times an hour until frozen.

New York baked vanilla cheesecake

Serves: 12 Preparation time: 30 minutes Baking time: 1 hour For the base: 50g (1¾oz) unsalted butter, plus extra for greasing 140g (5oz) plain white flour 1 tsp baking powder 50g (1¾oz) unrefined golden caster sugar 1 free-range egg yolk For the filling: 900g (2lbs) full-fat cream cheese 190g (6¾oz) unrefined golden caster sugar 1 tbsp Nielsen-Massey vanilla bean paste 4 free-range eggs l Preheat the oven to 150°C/130°C fan/300°F/gas mark 2. Grease and line the base of a 23cm (9in) round springform tin. l Place the butter, flour, baking powder, caster sugar and butter into the bowl of a mixer and beat together until you get a fine crumb consistency. Mix in the egg yolk. l Tip this into the prepared tin, spread evenly across then press down firmly using the back of a large spoon or your hand. l Bake in the oven for 20-25 minutes to set the base. leave to cool while you make the filling. l Beat together the cream cheese, S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Serve New York baked vanilla cheesecake with beautiful berries

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

43

James Martin’s pick of British berries I’ve chosen to work with Asda because I believe that together we can provide the best summer food for everyone.

And who doesn’t love a strawberry at this time of year, with that sweet, juicy flavour you get? Simple, quality produce like Asda’s berries really makes all the difference. So make the most of them in my simple summer Swiss Roll recipe.

James Martin

serves 8

35-40 min.

Did you know Asda’s British strawberries are expertly handpicked to ensure the freshest taste?

Photography shows serving suggestion. British strawberries not available in Northern Ireland.

For this recipe and more, search Asda James Martin

food caster sugar and vanilla bean paste until the mixture is very smooth and thick, taking care not to over-beat. l Add the eggs, one at a time and mixing after each. you should end up with a smooth, creamy mixture. l Spoon this into the tin on top of the baked base then spread it evenly across the base. l Wrap the base of the tin with foil, place it in a deep baking tray then fill with water to halfway up the side of the tin. Bake in the oven for 35-40 minutes. The top of the cheesecake should still be wobbly in the centre – it’s important not to overcook it. l Remove from the oven and leave to cool in the tin before carefully removing, then leave to cool completely in the fridge. Serve on its own or with fresh berries.

Vanilla crème brûlée

Cooking time: 40 minutes Preparation time: 10 minutes plus 2 hours’ chilling 450ml (15¾fl oz) double cream 150ml (5¼fl oz) whole milk 1 tsp Nielsen-Massey vanilla bean paste 6 medium egg yolks 50g (1¾oz) golden caster sugar, plus an extra 2-3 tbsps for the topping l Preheat the oven to 180°C/ 160°C/350°f/gas mark 4.

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Impress your guests with tasty vanilla crème brûlée l Bring the cream and milk just to the boil in a saucepan with the vanilla bean paste. Meanwhile, whisk together the egg yolks and sugar in a bowl then pour on the hot cream while continuously whisking. l Strain the custard into 6 small oven-proof ramekins and put them all into a large deep-sided roasting tin. Cover each loosely with foil, making a hole in the centre for steam to escape. Make

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

a bain-marie by pouring hot water from the kettle into the tin to halfway up the side of the ramekins. l Bake in the oven for 30-35 minutes or until the custards are just barely set in the centre (check after 25 minutes). Remove the ramekins from the oven and dispose of the water. Take off the foil and cool on a wire rack for 5 minutes. Cover with clingfilm and chill in the fridge for 2 hours or until needed.

l When ready to serve, cover each custard with a thin layer of golden caster sugar using the back of a large spoon. Sprinkle with a little water to just dampen the tops and caramelise using a cook’s blow torch. Alternatively, cook for 4-5 minutes under a very hot grill until all the sugar has melted and turned a lovely golden colour. l Serve when the brûlée is firm or within an hour or 2.

45

food Serves: 6 Preparation time: 20 minutes Baking time: 10 minutes For the sponge: 250g (8¾oz) unsalted butter 250g (8¾oz) unrefined golden caster sugar 250g (8¾oz) ground almonds 30g (1oz) plain white flour 4 free-range eggs ½ tsp Nielsen-Massey almond extract For the topping: 250ml (8¾fl oz) raspberry purée 3 tbsps unrefined golden caster sugar 4 gelatine leaves, soaked in cold water then drained 250g (8¾oz) mascarpone cheese 150ml (5¼fl oz) vanilla custard 300g (10½oz) fresh raspberries 1 tbsp elderflower cordial 3 tbsps kirsch cherry brandy Icing sugar, for dusting l Preheat the oven to 200°C/ 180°C fan/400°f/gas mark 6 and line a baking tray with baking paper. l Cream the butter, 250g (8¾oz) of sugar, ground almonds and plain flour together with an electric whisk.

Add the eggs, 1 at a time, and keep whisking after each addition. Add the almond extract and mix well. l Spread the sponge mixture on to the lined baking tray and bake for 10-12 minutes until golden

brown. once cooked, remove from the oven and leave to cool. l Heat the raspberry purée and 3 tablespoons of sugar in a saucepan and when it comes to the heat, add the gelatine and stir to dissolve. l Pour this jelly mixture into a deep baking tray lined with clingfilm and refrigerate to set. l In a bowl, soften the mascarpone cheese then add the vanilla custard.

Stir, mix well and keep aside. l In another bowl, add the raspberries and elderflower cordial.

Gently stir to coat the raspberries. l Cut 4 large and 4 small discs out of the sponge using round pastry cutters. l In each of 4 individual glass bowls, put the smaller sponge discs at the bottom and drizzle with some of the kirsch. Add some mascarpone cream mixture, followed by the raspberries.

Add another layer of cream, then a layer of sponge, more kirsch and finally more cream on the top. Spoon some raspberries in the middle and any remaining juice. l Take the jelly out of the fridge, place a piece of greaseproof paper over the top, invert and carefully peel off the clingfilm from the jelly. Cut the jelly into cubes and place them on the cream around the raspberries. dust with icing sugar and serve.

Recipe courtesy of Eric Lanlard

Serve moreish mango purée with vanilla, coconut and cardamom panna cotta

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Raspberry and elderflower trifle is a classy take on the traditional dessert

Vanilla, coconut and cardamom panna cotta

Serves: 4 Preparation time: 25 minutes For the panna cotta: 12 green cardamom pods 3 gelatine leaves 150ml (5¼fl oz) double cream 75g (2¾oz) unrefined golden caster sugar 200ml (7fl oz) coconut milk 200ml (7fl oz) whole milk 2 tsps Nielsen-Massey vanilla bean paste For the mango purée: 2 mangoes l lightly crush the cardamom pods with the flat side of a large knife to split the seeds. Gently scrape out the seeds and discard the pods. l using a pestle and mortar, crush up the seeds until they’re powdery. l Soak the gelatine leaves in cold water for 5 minutes. l Add the crushed seeds, cream, sugar, coconut milk, whole milk and

vanilla bean paste to a large saucepan, whisking gently to avoid any lumps. l Heat the cream mixture to a simmer then remove from the hob. l Squeeze any remaining water from the gelatine leaves, add to the mixture and allow to dissolve. l once the gelatine is fully dissolved, pour the mixture into 4 ramekins. l leave to cool then chill for 3-4 hours or until set. l Peel the mangoes then slice up the flesh. Keep aside a few chunks for added texture when serving. l Blend the remaining mangoes to make a smooth purée and serve alongside the panna cotta.

Home economist: Dominic Hoile Flowers by Bloom & Wild (020 7352 9499, bloomandwild.com) For more information, visit nielsenmassey.co.uk.

RECIPES CREATEd By THE BAKING MAd TEAM

Raspberry and elderflower trifle

47

WINE

Jamie Goode

Our expert goes on a voyage of discovery to find bottles from exotic places

T

he wine world has grown and flourished over the last couple of decades. As well as the classics from France, Italy and Spain, we have New World wines from California, Australia, Chile, Argentina and New Zealand.

And then there’s South Africa, where there’s a mix of the old and the new. But of late we’re starting to see bottles from more exotic locations such as Macedonia, Georgia, Greece, Romania, Turkey and Israel. So this week’s super selection includes a Romanian pinot noir, a shiraz from Israel and a sweet red from Macedonia. Enjoy!

Waitrose Pinot Noir 2015, Dealu Mare, Romania £5.99, Waitrose, 13% alcohol It’s rare to find a good, cheap pinot noir but this one is supple, fresh and juicy with simple, direct cherry and berry fruits, with a bit of sweetness on the finish.

Recanati Shiraz 2014, Upper Galilee, Israel £14.99, Waitrose, 14% alcohol Although the Israeli wine industry is small, there are some tasty bottles emerging, such as this floral, aromatic, vivid shiraz bursting with pure sweet berry fruits.

Tbilvino Qvevris 2014, Kakheti, Georgia £9, Marks & Spencer, 12% alcohol About half of this wine is made in a super-traditional Georgian way in large clay pots called qvevri, which brings out the flavours.

Full-yellow in colour, it has moreish apple pie and lemon fruitiness with some exotic apricots, too.

It’s gorgeous stuff.

Wine Atlas Feteascã Regalã NV, Romania £4.97, Asda, 11.5% alcohol Feteascã regalã is the grape variety here, and it has fashioned a white

wine that is grapey and bright with a hint of sweetness. Rounded, juicy and pretty, this wine is highly drinkable and a bargain at under a fiver.

Vinkara Öküzgözü 2013, Turkey £7.75, thewinecociety.com (01438 741177), 14% alcohol I love this Turkish red, which is fresh, sweetly fruited, soft and textured with cherry fruit and some stony undercurrents. It’s stylish, warm and rounded.

Nassiakos Semeli Mantinia 2015, Greece £9.75, The Wine Society (as before), 12% alcohol Made from moschofilero grapes grown at high altitude where it’s a bit cooler, this has floral aromas of rose petals and attractive fresh lemony flavours. It’s bracing, dry and food-friendly.

Tikves Barovo Red 2012, Macedonia £22.50, bbr.com (0800 280 2440), 14.5% alcohol Sweet and vivid, this Macedonian red has bold, ripe berry fruits with spicy notes. It’s one for those who like their reds luxurious, concentrated and rich.

SAVE OVER 50% when you join the The Express Wine Club, powered by Virgin Wines, is delighted to offer readers a massive £54 saving on this pick of 12 delicious bottles – the perfect introduction to the Virgin Wines Discovery Club*!

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£4.1 17 a bottle!

224 1020 quoting EX2038 or visit www.virginwines.co.uk/ex2038

*Ts&Cs Apply: Offer available to new Discovery Club members only. Important – your future cases: Every three months and at Christmas, you will be notified in advance of the next Discovery Club selection. You will receive this unless you request otherwise, and the appropriate sum (currently £89.99 + £6.99 p&p) will be charged to your credit/debit card. You have no commitment whatsoever and may opt out from the Discovery Club at any time. All wines supplied by Virgin Wines. Company registration number 03800762. You must be 18 or over to purchase alcohol. Calls may be monitored or recorded for training purposes. For full Ts&Cs please visit www.virginwines.co.uk/ex2038

Also available as an all-red or all-white selection.

Alan Titchmarsh

Every week in S Magazine

you don’t need a garden bathed in Mediterranean sunshine for grape growing. Find a warm, sheltered spot and it’ll be a vintage year, says Alan

T

he Romans cultivated vineyards in Britain 2,000 years ago and today’s warm summers are again making vine-growing a very practical proposition. Growers have been quick to take advantage of the changing climate to produce local plonk but at home the reason most people want to grow grapes is simply to eat them.

It is not difficult to do and vines give the garden a delightfully Mediterranean atmosphere with their architectural foliage and bunches of fruit. But you do need the right spot – your warmest, sunniest and most sheltered corner, ideally against a south-facing wall where the soil is well drained. It is also worth growing grapes on a free-standing trellis, pergola or gazebo if you have a very sheltered, sunny spot.

To enjoy ripe, sweet fruit you also need the right type of grape. Most of those sold in garden centres are wine-making varieties and are too sour to eat, or they are ornamental types that are grown for their foliage rather than their fruit. So to be sure of getting a really good dessert variety go to a specialist nursery.

Each variety of grape has its own likes and dislikes. Some do reasonably well in a warm, sheltered spot out in

the open and a few are fine for pots on a patio, but most need the protection of walls, since brick or stonework act like a giant radiator that is almost, but not quite, as good as growing in a greenhouse.

The best time to plant a vine is while it is dormant between November and early March. If it hasn’t already been pruned by the nursery cut it down to three leaf-joints above ground level when you plant it.

This might seem wasteful, but believe me it helps the new vine establish itself well and it will soon make lots of new growth when it gets going the following year. you can plant vines while they are still in leaf in summer as long as they have been grown in pots. If you do plant in summer, though, wait until the following November or December before cutting them down hard. They bleed if you cut them in growing mode.

Before planting a vine you need to prepare the soil exceptionally well.

Dig out a big trench at least 3ft (1½metres) wide and 2ft (61cm) deep and bury as much organic matter as you can in the bottom.

A couple of barrowloads is not too much as grapes need plenty of moisture-retaining material underneath them, especially if you

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S MAGAZINE ★ 24 July 2016

GArdENING Best of the bunch

phOtOGrAphS: GEtty IMAGES / AlAMy

dAndy

are growing them against a wall. put up netting or trellis for tying the long floppy stems on to – it will make life so much easier later – then mix more organic matter in with good topsoil and plant your vine at least 12in (30½cm) from the wall or fence.

If you are putting in several plants, space them 3ft apart. the next spring, when the vine starts to grow, you can take the easy route and let it ramble naturally over the wall, but space out the stems and tie them in for support. From then on just shorten the main stems and remove weak, overcrowded or unwanted side shoots every december to keep the plant tidy. It will look good as a decorative climber and produce some useful fruit. but if big, serious bunches of grapes are your objective, it pays to train a vine properly. It may seem complicated when it is described but it is much easier to do than it sounds.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 July 2016

In spring, select the two strongest shoots and nip out all the others while they are still small. Allow the chosen shoots to grow upwards. In december, prune them back to within three leaf-joints of the base – the aim is merely to strengthen the plant for now. In year two, leave three strong shoots to grow and nip out the rest. prune off two more at 2ft high in december and cut the third off at three leaf-joints above the ground.

Clusters of Léon Millot grapes are great for eating and (left) vines create a delightful Mediterranean atmosphere in the garden

In the spring of year three train the two long shoots out horizontally, one each side of the plant about 18in (45¾cm) above ground level. these should each carry one or two bunches of grapes that summer. let a couple of shoots grow up from the base of the plant and prune these off at 2ft high in december. Cut off the fruited stems a bud or two from the main plant stem, then in spring tie the two 2ft shoots in their place. do that

rEAdEr OFFEr Make a sensational spring show in your garden with this RHS award-winning single early tulip “Apricot Beauty”. The strong, long-lasting tulips bloom in April and have unusual, light apricot-rose coloured, cup-shaped flowers. The flowers are very good for cutting and make excellent floral arrangements.

every year afterwards. you will have fewer but bigger and easier to reach grapes. to ensure the fruit is a good size, remove one in three grapes from all over the bunch once they have reached the diameter of a pea.

Growing grapes is a real feather in your cap. put some in a blender with other fruit to make smoothies or feed them through a juicer for fresh grape juice. you can keep it in the freezer, so nothing goes to waste.

You can buy 15 10cm-11cm (4in) bulbs for £7.99 or get 60 for half price at £15.98. All prices include p&p. Order online at www.shop. express.co.uk/EXP211, call 0871 988 8356 or send a cheque, made payable to Express Newspapers, to Express Offer EXP211, 14 Hadfield Street, Old Trafford, Manchester M16 9FG. Delivery is within 28 days.

51

wE rESErvE thE rIGht tO SubStItutE ANy vArIEtIES FOr OthErS OF EquAl Or GrEAtEr vAluE

Vine &

Interlaken – these sweet, golden-yellow seedless grapes will grow well on a south-facing wall or on a fence around a suntrap patio.

Black Corinth – with small, sweet, red seedless grapes, these do well in pots and the fruit can also be dried to make currants.

Brant – this reliable old faithful is ornamental and edible with great autumn-tinted foliage and small bunches of sweet, black, but pippy grapes.

Gloire de Boskoop – A dual-purpose vine with crops of sweet black grapes and colourful foliage.

Léon Millot – this black grape is good for eating or for grape juice. It has slight autumn tints.

Strawberry – A large, vigorous, prolific vine with pink grapes that have a faint strawberry flavour.

Vitis vinifera Purpurea – this is the classic purple-leaved vine that is usually grown as an ornamental climber. but in a sunny spot it also bears crops of sweet, purple grapes.

Charlotte Heathcote

Every week in S Magazine

Law & order

Dark crimes and devious minds come under scrutiny in jake Kerridge’s pick of the most gripping new crime thrillers

I See You ****

by Clare Mackintosh (Sphere, £12.99) Mackintosh won huge acclaim for her debut novel I Let You Go, a thriller that pulled off the rare combination of making readers’ heads spin with its twists and turns while landing emotional blows that got them in the solar plexus every time. It was a memorable study of a mother grieving for a lost child as well as an irresistible page-turner.

Her second book is another blend of the domestic and the outré. The heroine is Zoe Walker, the matriarch of what seems an averagely dysfunctional family, and Mackintosh is very good on the squabbles and minor emergencies of family life. But this sense of normality makes it all the more terrifying when the story lurches into nightmare, with Zoe spotting a photo of herself in the classified ads of a newspaper. It turns out that her image is being used to advertise an extremely sinister website and she has to convince the police that her life is in danger.

Mackintosh is an ex-police officer and writes particularly well about the way police interact with each other and with the victims of crime: the exchanges between Zoe and the dynamic PC Kelly Swift, who is determined to break any rule to keep Zoe safe, feel unusually authentic. A sub-plot in which Kelly tries to atone for failing to save her sister from a sexual assault years earlier provides the most moving moments. There is a lot of what feels like hard-won wisdom in this book.

But there are times when the main plot, which often stretches credibility to breaking point, doesn’t quite do the characters justice. This is another page-turner for sure but it doesn’t pack the same emotional wallop as Mackintosh’s first book.

Lie With Me *****

by Sabine Durrant (Mulholland, £14.99) The narrator of Durrant’s eighth novel is Paul Morris, a writer who was once a literary wunderkind but

Walk on the wild side

ANDy CARSoN

Step into someone else’s shoes with Caroline Sanderson’s choice of the most exciting new biographies and memoirs

Les Parisiennes

by Anne Sebba (Weidenfeld & Nicolson, £20) This is an elegant, enthralling and richly illustrated account of how the female residents of the French capital survived the Second World War and its aftermath with Parisian panache. It collects the experiences of dozens of women from all walks of life including novelist Irène Nemirovsky, racing driver Violette Morris and Resistance operative jeannie de Clarens. Even as the swastika flew from the Eiffel Tower and in a climate of “constant 52

moral ambiguity”, women found myriad ways to put on lipstick and carry on.

The Staircase Girls

by Catherine Seymour (Pan, £7.99) Seymour, descended from generations of “bedders”, documents the hitherto uncelebrated lives of these doughty workingclass women who looked after university of Cambridge students from the 1920s to the 70s. As well as making beds and dusting

now in his forties finds himself a forgotten failure, constantly cadging off friends with promises of repayment from the royalties on books he hasn’t got round to writing and trying to impress much younger women with the last tatty remnants of his fame.

I have encountered a few Paul Morrises in real life and Durrant captures with pinpoint precision their characteristic tone of self-satisfied superiority mingled with emotional neediness. In real life, I would try to avoid Morris-types like the plague but, thanks to the magic of fiction, I felt bereft when I had to part company from Paul at the end of this book.

Lie With Me opens with the penniless Paul being forced to move back in with his mother and desperately seeking someone with a spare room.

A chance meeting with some old university friends leads to him being introduced to a comely lawyer called Alice and he starts to inveigle his way into her life, to the disgust of her teenage children.

desks, the likes of joyce, Nance, Maud, Rose and Audrey also found themselves mothering, chastising and even covering up for their “boys”, all while enduring domestic dramas aplenty of their own. It’s both heartwarming and humbling.

Dear Michael, Love Dad

by Iain Maitland (Hodder & Stoughton, £16.99) “I’ve never told my son Michael I love him.” After leaving home for university, Michael Maitland developed depression, obsessivecompulsive disorder and almost fatal anorexia. This book of letters written from father to son is by turns acidly funny, exasperating and poignant, painting a moving portrait both of mental illness and of a father in denial. By the time Iain realises how ill his son is, it’s almost too late.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

BookS

The action soon shifts from upmarket london to Pyros, a (fictional) Greek island where Paul crashes Alice’s family holiday and gets mixed up in the decade-old mystery of a teenager’s disappearance.

There is no doubt that schadenfreude plays a part in the enjoyment of this book as, thanks to Durrant’s clever construction of her plot, every lie that Paul tells to save himself from some minor or major inconvenience ends up redoubling on him. But despite Paul’s awfulness, he is oddly irresistible and will gain readers’ sympathy even though he manifestly doesn’t deserve it. I doubt there will be a better beach read out this summer.

Blood Wedding ****

by Pierre Lemaitre (MacLehose Press, £12.99) Forget the authors of Nordic noir: if you want to read a crime novel that chills you to the bone then

But paternal love – albeit undemonstrative and mostly unspoken – shines through.

The Girl Who Beat Isis

by Farida Khalaf (Square Peg, £14.99) As recently as summer 2014, Farida was a lively teenager, leading a happy family life in a northern Iraqi village. But her yazidi community of “infidels” became a target for invading Isis jihadists, who murdered her father and brother before taking Farida and the other women prisoner.

She endured beatings, rapes and being sold as a sex slave until one day she took a chance and led five younger girls to freedom through the Syrian desert. It’s a shattering, brave, enraging book but also a stirring story of survival.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

go for the French. The writer Pierre lemaitre strikes me as having a block of ice where his heart should be, so mercilessly does he heap misery upon his hapless characters.

The central character in Blood Wedding is mild-mannered Sophie, a former PR high-flyer reduced to working as a nanny after suffering from mental illness. Mysterious and violent deaths seem to occur whenever Sophie is around and one morning she wakes after a blackout to find that her bratty six-year-old charge has been strangled with the laces from her walking shoes.

I suspect that, despite themselves, most readers will find themselves rooting for Sophie as she goes on the run and she proves surprisingly adept at building a new identity, turning out to have “a nose for finding unlicensed studios, unauthorised sublets, cash-in-hand jobs, in short, all the little tricks she needs to settle into a new town”. The novel is a fascinating account of the ways in which determined people can make themselves disappear but unfortunately for Sophie, she is being followed by somebody who knows all about her past.

Although lemaitre is far too subtle a writer to dwell on the grisly details of the multiple murders in his story, his depiction of the mind of a serial killer is deeply disturbing. What could have been melodramatic in the hands of a lesser author seems all too real in lemaitre’s deliberately flat, unsensational prose, ably translated here

by Frank Wynne. Not recommended for those of a nervous disposition, this is a thoroughly frightening account of how easily and how badly an ordinary life can go wrong.

Dog Medicine: How My Dog Saved Me From Myself

by Julie Barton (Bluebird, £7.99) “I believe that when I was suffering most dearly, the universe sent me a healer in the form of a dog.” In this engaging and beautifully written memoir, a young American writer charts the anguish of severe depression and breakdown then the road to recovery that came in the seemingly unlikely shape of a golden retriever puppy called Bunker. Although unsentimental and definitely not cute, it’s still a shining testament to the remarkable capacity of animals to bring healing into our lives.

To buy the books on these pages, see Express Bookshop on page 81.

Top fives TTop five fiction 1. After You

by Jojo Moyes (Penguin, £7.99) 2. The Girl On The Train

by Paula Hawkins (Black Swan, £7.99) 3. Get Even

by Martina Cole (Headline, £7.99) 4. Fool Me Once

by Harlan Coben (Arrow, £7.99) 5. Where My Heart Used To Beat

by Sebastian Faulks (Vintage, £8.99)

Top five non-fiction 1. Lean In 15: The Shape Plan

by Joe Wicks (Bluebird, £14.99) 2. Lean In 15

by Joe Wicks (Bluebird, £14.99) 3. The Road To Little Dribbling

by Bill Bryson (Black Swan, £8.99) 4. Tanya Bakes

by Tanya Burr (Penguin, £16.99) 5. Skyfaring: A Journey With A Pilot by Mark Vanhoenacker (Vintage, £8.99)

Top five children’s 1. The World’s Worst Children

by David Walliams (HarperCollins Children’s, £14.99) 2. Tom Gates: Super Good Skills (Almost…) by Liz Pichon (Scholastic, £10.99) 3. Awful Auntie

by David Walliams (HarperCollins Children’s, £6.99) 4. All The Bright Places

by Jennifer Niven (Penguin, £7.99) 5. Gangsta Granny

by David Walliams (HarperCollins Children’s, £6.99) 53

fIctIoN

Café Society

though a singleton, tilly was good at doling out love advice... By Emma Hannigan

GEtty IMAGES

T

hey say the best way to a man’s heart is via his stomach. that notion might have worked for countless generations, but tilly jackson had given up on all prospects of men long ago. She wasn’t unhappy with her lot. At least, she hadn’t realised she was until Archie entered her world.

When her mother Meg’s health failed, tilly took full charge of the beachside café they ran. It wasn’t a massive step by any stretch. She’d worked there baking scones, cakes and pastries for as long as she could recall. While school had been a necessary evil, Meg had never pressurised or actually encouraged tilly to do well. Nor had she particularly minded if tilly had missed a day here and there. “the sun so rarely shines in the west of Ireland. you may as well make the most of it.”

With no father, brother or uncles, tilly was understandably awkward around men. the all-girl’s school she attended was old-fashioned and so she never exactly learned how to woo men, either. By the time she reached 40, tilly had resigned herself to the life of a spinster. trips to Galway, the nearest city, were few and far between and most of the time, she wasn’t overly bothered about going. Hers was a simple existence where the customers came first and the café provided a way of paying the bills while keeping her amused. tilly wasn’t what any man would have described as a siren. She didn’t own make-up or high heels and wouldn’t entertain faddy diets or S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

passing fashions. But she was never short of conversation. over the years, she became something of an agony aunt for the tormented souls of the village.

When Meg passed away, tilly found the evenings in the flat above the café to be endlessly lonely. on a whim, she closed the café early one rainy and grim afternoon and drove to the city. In a computer store, she approached the least threatening looking sales assistant with her heart thudding. An acne-spattered, weedy young fellow with a coat-hanger type of frame listened patiently as she expressed an interest in a laptop.

“It needs to be a foolproof one.

It’s for someone who is learning,” she whispered.

When the fellow quizzed her about broadband speeds and other such matters, she managed to bluff her way through as sweat trickled nervously down her spine. Knowing she could ask Archie for help – one of the local fellows who frequently sat in the café with his laptop – she made her selection and drove home. the following morning, when Archie pitched up for his usual cappuccino and scone, she whispered that she’d like to offer him a trade-off.

“Would you help me to organise broadband and set up my computer and I’ll give you free breakfasts for a month?”

Archie agreed readily and within a week, she was up and running. the offer of free Wi-fi brought new customers flooding to the café.

“If I’d known how much of a draw it was, I’d have done this years ago,” she said in astonishment to a grinning Archie.

He was incredibly kind and seemed anxious to offer as much technical support as possible. “otherwise, I’d feel too guilty to accept those delicious breakfasts for free.” the evenings seemed less empty as tilly browsed through all sorts of websites from fashion to factual.

Her newfound love of all things online led to even further conversations with the customers, and parcels began to appear as she became a dab hand at internet shopping.

All the while, the problems of the village were continuously discussed at her counter.

“I think you should tell that girl to sling her hook,” tilly told a strickenlooking young lad. “you deserve better and I’m furious with that little minx for treating you so shabbily.”

As she handed over endless pots of tea and mugs of frothy coffee, accompanied by sweet and comforting bakes, her sensible words were always appreciated.

Archie surprised her one morning by ordering a second cappuccino.

He appeared to be waiting for the prework rush to die down.

Sensing his need for a chat, tilly approached, hoping she wasn’t looking foolish with her smoky-eyed make-up (learned from a fabulous fashion blog) and her newly delivered, high-waisted jeans. “can you sit for a moment?” he asked.

She perched opposite him.

“I’ve been watching you for quite some time now, tilly,” he said. “I’m

not sure if you’re aware of what I do for a living?” He raised an eyebrow. “you work for a newspaper, don’t you?” She smiled as he nodded.

“I’m one of the main editors of The Irish News, as it happens.

“How would you feel about being our new agony aunt?” he asked.

“I’ve noticed how many people come to you with issues and how easily you dole out solid and helpful advice. Do you think you could do it on your laptop and email it to me?” tilly’s hand went to her mouth as she looked at him oddly.

“But I barely leave this village. Who am I to solve people’s problems?” “you’re the best candidate I could imagine. you’ve grown up listening rather than preaching, tilly. that’s rarer than you realise, especially in this day and age.” once she got the hang of typing, tilly’s column took off like wildfire.

She invited Archie to dinner with no other intention than to thank him for all he’d done. But nobody was happier or more surprised than tilly when he admitted his feelings for her.

As he kissed her, she knew her life was about to take on a whole new meaning.

She may have been a late bloomer, but tilly had a hunch that the best was yet to come.

Emma Hannigan’s new novel, The Perfect Gift (Headline Review, £7.99) is out now. See Bookshop on page 81.

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GEtty IMAGES

INtErvIEw “thIS photo was taken last year at the closing night of Spamalot in wimbledon.

I’m with Eric Idle, Sarah Earnshaw, Professor Brian Cox and my son, joe. joe played Patsy and I played King Arthur. It was the first time my son and I had worked together and it was brilliant, but I had to take our personal relationship out of the picture and treat him like another actor. that was a weird sensation.

I enjoyed two west End runs and a six-month tour of Spamalot. It was hard work. Every week someone new would play the role of God on a pre-recorded video, as voted for by the audience. we had Eric, Barbara windsor and other Monty Python actors. that night the audience voted for Professor Brian Cox and because he was in the area, he made an appearance on stage.

I was so pleased to meet him as I’m studying for a degree in Earth sciences with the Open university. we talked at great length about it after the show. I think he’s a legend.

As for Eric Idle, I grew up watching Monty Python. My dad said it was too rude for me because of the cartoons of topless women. But when he worked night shifts my mum would let me watch it. In those days there was no such thing as a video recorder, so I only saw the odd episode.

I was so thrilled to be in Spamalot.

Eric even came to see us and we had a little do afterwards – lots of sausages on sticks. he was such a gracious man and it was a pleasure to be in his company. there was a lot of singing involved in the show. I’m no

Michael Ball; we won’t be releasing a duets album. the nature of the show was comical. It was no Les Miserables. Eric was very complimentary of my singing and portrayal of the role. Even if it was awful I don’t think he’d have said.

Comedy wasn’t my first calling.

I wanted to be a geologist but when I was 13 years old I got run over and broke my leg badly and was in hospital for most of a year. I missed the chance to choose my subject options at school and ended up with woodwork, home economics, cooking and German. I was miserable. I finally got to fulfil my childhood wishes and take up my degree as an adult.

I never wanted to get up in the morning and do a proper job. I found

a new job at a holiday camp, calling the bingo and refereeing wrestling in the early 80s. that’s when I found my passion for comedy.

I remember my first appearance on New Faces in 1987. I didn’t even have an act. I turned up with a tiny little guitar and performed a Spanish folk song called Amoosh Sadoo Agee.

I smashed up the guitar and the judges killed themselves laughing.

I won the heat, came second in the grand final and never looked back.

I’m well-known for my roles in panto. It gets my head down for six weeks, with two shows a day. It’s like a marathon really, but I enjoy it. I’m allowed to throw the script out of the window, which isn’t quite as fun for my fellow actors. the audience loves

the lunacy, and so do I. My favourite panto role has to be Buttons from Cinderella, but you can’t beat Spamalot. It’s a work of genius.

I do all this because I realised my own mortality a few years back. we’re not here forever. I take any opportunity that I can learn things from.

My new tour is coming up. One Man And His Bog will see me on stage with my psychic twin, raynard. we’ll do mind-reading, painting and singing – expect two hours of nonsense. It never feels like work.

My dad told me to find a job that I’d do for nothing, and here I am!”

One Man And His Bog runs from August 2 to September 4. For more information, see joepasquale.com.

My favourite photograph by comedian Joe Pasquale Stand-up star and actor joe, 54, recalls playing it for laughs on the set of the much-loved musical, Spamalot and meeting his hero Eric Idle words by Kirsten jones S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

57

watch What to

Magical music, robots, cooking – John Marrs reveals the best on the box

Programme of the week BBC Proms 2016: David Bowie Friday, 10.15pm, BBC4

Fans of the late, great David Bowie will love this wonderful Proms tribute to the Thin White Duke.

Following his shock death in january, musical tributes have already taken place at the Brits, the Grammys and Glastonbury. Now Berlin-based musicians’ ensemble Stargaze will be reinterpreting songs from Bowie’s extensive 50-year back catalogue live from london’s iconic Royal Albert Hall. And they’ll get a little help from Bowie’s biggest musician fans. look and listen out for Marc Almond, laura Mvula, john Cale, Paul Buchanan, Conor O’Brien, Amanda Palmer and counter-tenor Philippe jaroussky as they bring new life to some of the greatest songs of all time.

Robot Wars

Dragon’s Den

Celebrity MasterChef

Dara Ó Briain and Angela Scanlon are the new hosts eagerly watching over the carnage as 40 teams of amateur robot-fighting enthusiasts battle it out to become the champs. But as well as hoping to knock out each other’s robots, they must also beware of the house cyborgs that are on a mission to destroy.

After a few tumultuous years that saw the line-up change more often than X Factor judges, things have settled down for this new season. Evan Davis presents the business ideas contest while Deborah Meaden, Peter jones, Sarah Willingham, Touker Suleyman and Nick jenkins are panellists.

After six weeks of tough challenges, 20 celebrity hopefuls will be whittled down to just one as MasterChef reaches its gripping climax. But before one of Friday night’s final three is crowned, they’ve got to impress some of the country’s top chefs, then come up with a faultless three-course meal.

tonight, 8pm, BBC2

Soap watch

David is unnervingly upbeat tomorrow, insisting on returning to work. But he’s clearly still deeply troubled and by Friday, he’s telling Sarah he’ll avenge Kylie’s death. Elsewhere, after finding out leanne is pregnant, Michelle tells Steve they should have a baby of their own.

Ben reveals to his dad this week that one of the attackers is now in custody, but Phil is shockingly unsupportive. later comes news that the suspect is out on bail, prompting Ben to consider taking matters into his own hands. Meanwhile, lee is still horrified at the prospect of becoming a dad.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

Friday, 8.30pm, BBC1

Mike Ward tunes in and catches up on the latest in the wonderful world of soapland

Coronation Street

EastEnders

tonight, 9pm, BBC2

Emmerdale

Andy ends the week behind bars after lawrence is gunned down at Home Farm. It’s actually lachlan who’s pulled the trigger (right) but protective mum Chrissie, out for revenge after Andy’s latest betrayal, is determined to protect her troubled d son.

Hollyoaks

Neeta is promising to be more considerate of Mac’s feelings. But she panics on Friday when posters arrive of her modelling for Adam and jesse’s new salon.

Neighbours N

P Paul puts together a plan to buy back lassiters and he delights in telling b TTerese she’ll be the first out of the door.

Elsewhere, Steph fears Elly has her eyes E on Mark while Paige soon regrets how o ffar she’s gone to get over jack.

Home And Away H

Nate bows to the inevitable tomorrow, inviting Brax to Summer Bay to speak to Ricky. Brax then takes the opportunity to put a life-changing proposition to his ex.

Doctors is on its summer break.

59

BBC 1

Fake or Fortune? 8pm 6.00

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Sunday Morning Live (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 Wanted Down Under (rpt) (T) (W) 12.00 Bargain Hunt (rpt) (T) (W) 1.00 BBC News, Weather (W) (HD) 1.15 Homes Under The Hammer (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 2.15 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.00 Animal Super Parents (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 4.00 Eat Well For Less? (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 5.00 Lifeline (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Songs Of Praise (T) (W) (HD) 5.45 Pointless Celebrities. Quiz show. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

6.30 bbC NEWS Latest national headlines. (T) (W) (HD) 6.50 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 7.00 CouNTRyFILE An episode from Cumbria marking the 150th anniversary of Beatrix Potter’s birth, in which Matt Baker visits the places that inspired her work and Naomi Wilkinson meets an artist who depicts inspirational women of the region.

Includes Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) 8.00 FakE oR FoRTuNE? (2/4) Fiona Bruce and art expert Philip Mould visit a B&B in Aberdeenshire to pick up where the owner’s late husband left off in proving that a painting is the work of 19th-Century French artist Paul Delaroche. (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 THE SECRET agENT (2/3) Verloc leaves the city for Michaelis’ Kent cottage to prepare his bombing plot, taking Stevie with him.

Back in London, the Professor prepares to take action against Inspector Heat. (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 bbC NEWS Latest news headlines. (T) (W) (HD) 10.20 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.30 LIVE aT THE apoLLo (6/8) Sarah Millican hosts the stand-up show recorded at London’s Hammersmith Apollo, introducing routines by Australian funnyman Steve Hughes and awardwinning comic Russell Kane, who both give their own take on modern life. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) FoR SCHMuCkS (2010) 11.15 FILM dINNER An ambitious executive hopes to win a mean-spirited contest held by his bosses to find the most ridiculous dinner-party guest for everyone to mock. He thinks he has found the perfect winning entry when he meets a dim-witted taxidermist.

Comedy, with Steve Carell and Paul Rudd. (T) Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) 1.05

BBC News. The latest national and international news and sport headlines, plus the weather. (T) (W) (HD)

BBC 2

dragons’ den, 9pm 6.15

The A To Z Of TV Gardening (rpt) 7.00 Great British Garden Revival (rpt) 8.00 Gardeners’ World (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.30 Countryfile (rpt) 9.30 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites (rpt) 11.00 A Cook Abroad: Rachel Khoo’s Malaysia (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 Lorraine Pascale: How To Be A Better Cook (rpt) 12.30 Inspire: The Olympic Journey. Gabby Logan meets rowers Helen Glover and Heather Stanning, and Darren Campbell talks to Taekwondo hopefuls Jade Jones and Bianca Walkden.

(T) (W) (HD) 1.00 Hitchcock’s Leading Actors: Talking Pictures (rpt) (T) (W) 1.30 FILM: Rear Window (1954) Hitchcock thriller, starring James Stewart. (T) (HD) 3.20 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.45 Flog It! (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 4.30 New Zealand: Earth’s Mythical Islands (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 5.30 Clare Balding Meets Heather Stanning And Helen Glover

6.00

STEEL (2011) In the future, boxing FILM REaL matches between eight-foot robots are one of the world’s biggest sporting draws. A washed-up human prizefighter finds an abandoned android and sets about restoring it to become a potential champion, a project that reunites him with his estranged 11-year-old son. Sci-fi drama, starring Hugh Jackman, Dakota Goyo and Evangeline Lilly. Edited for daytime broadcast. (T) (W) (HD) NEW RoboT WaRS Dara O Briain and Angela SERIES Scanlon host the revival of the series in which radio-controlled robots created by teams of amateur engineers battle it out in an arena. The machines have to make it through an initial group stage, then head-to-head rounds before the heat final. The first show features students from Reading and a family team from Caithness, as well as a memorable robot from the original series. (T) (W) NEW dRagoNS’ dEN Evan Davis presents SERIES the business ideas contest, with the panel considering the potential of plans for miniature pencils, giant beanbags and boot-cleaning machines.

FIxINg dad Two brothers document their efforts to ensure their father adopts a healthier lifestyle, as he struggles with various conditions linked to diabetes that threaten his life. (T) (W) HoRIzoN: SpoRTS dopINg – WINNINg aT aNy CoST? Dr Xand van Tulleken investigates the world of performance enhancing drugs. (rpt) (T) (W)

8.00

9.00

10.00

11.00

12.00 Sign Zone: Countryfile (rpt) 12.55 Sign Zone: Holby City (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 1.55 This Is BBC Two (T) (W) (HD)

IT V

Quantum of Solace, 8pm 6.00

CITV: Fort Boyard Ultimate Challenge (rpt) 6.20 Pat & Stan (rpt) 6.35 Dino Dan (rpt) 6.45 Dino Dan (rpt) 6.55 Signed Stories: Share A Story (rpt) 7.00 Sooty (rpt) (W) 7.15 Super 4 (rpt) (W) 7.30 Oddbods (rpt) (W) 7.35 Thunderbirds Are Go (rpt) (W) 8.00 Teen Titans Go! (rpt) (W) 8.25 ITV News (W) 8.30 Weekend 9.25 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) 10.25 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) 11.20 Judge Rinder (rpt) 12.20 ITV News, Weather (W) 12.25 Rebound (rpt) 1.25 Long Lost Family (rpt) (W) (HD) 2.30 Love Your Garden (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.30 Midsomer Murders (rpt) (W) 5.30 Masterpiece With Alan Titchmarsh. Alan and co-presenter Rachel Houston-Holland visit Parham House, West Sussex, where they invite teams of enthusiasts to compete to find the most rare and valuable items. (rpt) (W) (HD)

6.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional forecast.

6.45 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER National headlines. (W) 7.00 THE CHaSE: CELEbRITy SpECIaL (13/14) Astrologer Russell Grant, Atomic Kitten singer Liz McClarnon, Loose Women’s Sherrie Hewson and entertainer Des O’Connor compete to win thousands of pounds for charity by pitting their general knowledge against one of the show’s resident trivia experts. However, they must work as a team to build their prize pot and stay one step ahead of the Chaser. Bradley Walsh hosts. (rpt) (W) (HD) 8.00 oF SoLaCE (2008) FILM QuaNTuM James Bond sets out on a personal mission of vengeance as he pursues the secret criminal organisation Quantum. His search leads him to the head of an ecological corporation, who is plotting to orchestrate a coup in a Latin American country to get his hands on a precious natural resource. Spy thriller sequel, starring Daniel Craig, Olga Kurylenko, Judi Dench, Gemma Arterton and Mathieu Amalric. (W) 10.05 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.15 aM LEgENd (2007) A Manhattan-based FILM Imilitary scientist finds himself immune to a virus that turns humans into ferocious vampire-like creatures. After the disease has swept across the world, wiping out an estimated 90 per cent of the human population, he devotes his solitary existence to finding a cure by unlocking the secret within his blood. Sci-fi thriller, starring Will Smith. (W) (HD) 12.05 River Monsters (rpt) (W) (HD) 12.30 Jackpot247 (W) 3.00 Motorsport UK (W) (HD) 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD) 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (SL) (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

bbC2 SCoTLaNd As BBC2 except: 4.30-5.30 River City. Stella’s life is turned upside down when she gets a surprise visitor, while AJ tries to save his marriage to Annie now he knows about her affair. bbC2 NoRTHERN IRELaNd As BBC2 except: 10.00 War of the Three Kings 11.00-12.00 Fixing Dad. Two brothers document their efforts to ensure their father adopts a healthier lifestyle.

Security guard Geoff Whittington suffers from a variety of conditions liked to type two diabetes, which nearly resulted in him having to have a foot amputated and which have left him resigned to a premature death. However, his sons refuse to accept this.

ITV MERIdIaN As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-

6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV WESTCouNTRy As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV aNgLIa As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV yoRkSHIRE As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV TyNE TEES As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV boRdER As ITV except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

ITV WEST As ITV except: 6.30-6.45 Local News. Headlines.

ITV WaLES As ITV WEST except: 12.24-12.25 Local Weather 6.30-6.45 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather S4C 6.00 Cyw 8.50 Penblwyddi Cyw 8.55 Pen-Blwydd Pwy? 9.00 Becws 9.30 China 10.00 Her Yr Hinsawdd 10.30 Dal Ati: Dal Ati 11.30 Dal Ati: Dal Ati: Cwmni + Pigion y Sioe 12.30 Elim Ras Ryngwladol yr Wyddfa 2016 1.30 Y Babell Lên 2015 2.30 Llangollen 2016: Cyngerdd Gala 4.00 Seiclo: Le Tour de France 6.45 Newyddion 7.00 Dechrau Canu Dechrau Canmol 7.30 Cofio Gyda Cefin Roberts 8.00 Y Sioe 2016 9.00 Cymry Rhyfel Cartref Sbaen 10.00 Seiclo: Le Tour de France 10.30 Gwlad Beirdd. Tudur Dylan Jones visits Yr Hendre, the farm owned by Dic Jones until his death in 2009. 11.00-11.35 O’r Galon: Tu ol i’r Graith

CHANNEL 4

Finding nemo, 5.30pm 6.15

Shipping Wars (rpt) 6.40 Shipping Wars (rpt) 7.00 The King Of Queens (rpt) 7.30 The King Of Queens (rpt) 7.55 Frasier (rpt) 8.25 Frasier (rpt) 8.55 Dare To Believe: Natasha Baker (rpt) 9.00 Sunday Brunch (HD) 12.00 Formula 1: Hungarian Grand Prix Live. Coverage from the Hungaroring (Start-time 1.00pm). (HD) 3.30 Anniversary Games Athletics 2016 (HD) 4.00 Dare To Believe: Jordanne Whiley (rpt) (HD) 4.05 A Place In The Sun: Winter Sun (HD) 5.05 FILM: Toy Story That Time Forgot (2014) Premiere. Short animated comedy, with the voices of Tom Hanks and Tim Allen. (HD) 5.30 FILM: Finding Nemo (2003) Animated adventure, with the voices of Albert Brooks and Ellen DeGeneres. (W)

CHANNEL 5

Cricket on 5, 7pm 6.00

Milkshake! Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.05 Toby’s Travelling Circus (rpt) 6.15 Angelina Ballerina: The Next Steps (rpt) 6.30 Bob The Builder (rpt) 6.40 Wanda And The Alien (rpt) 6.50 Zack And Quack (rpt) 7.05 Pets (rpt) (HD) 7.10 Noddy In Toyland (rpt) 7.20 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 7.35 Little Princess (rpt) 7.45 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 8.00 Blaze And The Monster Machines (rpt) (HD) 8.30 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.45 Shimmer And Shine (HD) 9.10 Jelly Jamm (rpt) 9.30 LazyTown (rpt) (HD) 9.55 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (rpt) (HD) 10.30 Access (rpt) (HD) 10.40 Now That’s Funny! (rpt) (HD) 11.40 Now That’s Funny! (rpt) (HD) 12.40 FILM: RV: Runaway Vacation (2006) Family comedy, starring Robin Williams. (W) (HD) 2.30 FILM: Dennis The Menace Strikes Again (1998) Family comedy sequel, starring Justin Cooper. (W) (HD) 4.00 World’s Strongest Man 2015 (rpt) (HD) 5.00 World’s Strongest Man 2015 (rpt)

7.30 ChAnnel 4 newS National news headlines.

8.00 SAddAm goeS To hollywood Documentary about a disastrous movie bankrolled

by Saddam Hussein in the 1980s, which was to tell the story of the founding of Iraq. War with Iran disrupted filming, while the movie’s star, Oliver Reed, horrified the locals with his heavy drinking. Although the film was completed, the tapes were subsequently lost – only to be recovered years later. Cast and crew are reunited to watch never-before-seen rushes and behind-the-scenes footage. (HD) 9.00 SeCreT lIFe oF wAlTer FIlm The mITTy (2013) Premiere. An ordinary man seeks solace from his mundane life by drifting into daydreams where he is a heroic figure. When he and a friend are faced with unemployment, he is propelled into a globetrotting adventure in real life.

Comedy drama based on James Thurber’s short story, directed by and starring Ben Stiller. With Kristen Wiig, Adam Scott and Shirley MacLaine. (W) 11.05 FrIdAy nIghT dInner Dad accidentally invites someone he hates to come round for dinner, and has to find a way to get rid of him. Fourth series of the sitcom, starring Paul Ritter. (rpt) (HD) 11.40 dAre To BelIeVe: hAnnAh CoCkroFT (2/7) A profile of the British wheelchair athlete. (rpt) 11.45 FormulA 1 2016 hungArIAn grAnd PrIx hIghlIghTS Steve Jones presents the best of the action from the 11th round of the season. (HD)

6.00 world’S STrongeST mAn FInAl 2015 Action from the Grand Final of the competition, which took place in Malaysia, as the ten competitors who made it past the heats went head to head for the trophy. Last in the series. (rpt) (HD) 6.55 5 newS weekend The day’s headlines. (HD) 7.00 CrICkeT on 5 England v Pakistan. Mark Nicholas presents action from day three of the second Test, as captain Alastair Cook leads the team out to do battle at Old Trafford. (HD) 8.00 PuPPIeS mAke you lAugh ouT loud 2 Compilation of internet videos featuring dogs doing bizarre and humorous things. Narrated by Iain Lee, with contributors Dave Spikey and Zoe Lyons. (HD) 8.55 5 newS weekend The day’s headlines. (HD) 9.00 BIg BroTher Daily round-up of highlights as the remaining housemates start their final week under the all-seeing eye of Big Brother. (HD) 10.00 lIP SynC BATTle uS: STAr Trek SPeCIAl Star Trek Beyond stars Zoe Saldana and Zachary Quinto take part in a mime-off. (rpt) (HD) 11.00 20 momenTS ThAT ShoCked PoP (2/3) Countdown of performers, songs or occasions that impacted on the genre, including 1985’s Live Aid, which redefined how society donated to charity. (rpt)

12.45 FILM: Escape From Alcatraz (1979) Fact-based prison drama, starring Clint Eastwood. (W) (HD) 2.40 Born On The Same Day (rpt) (HD) 3.35 Superfoods: The Real Story (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Posh Pawn (rpt) (HD) 5.00 Kirstie’s Fill Your House For Free (rpt) (HD) 5.15 Fifteen To One (rpt) (HD)

12.30 Lip Sync Battle (rpt) (HD) 12.55 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Now That’s Funny! (rpt) (SL) (HD) 4.50 Wildlife SOS (rpt) (SL) 5.15 Wildlife SOS (rpt) (SL) 5.40 Angels Of Jarm (rpt) (SL) 5.50 Roary The Racing Car (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

5STAr

5uSA

6.00am Teleshopping 8.00 Access 8.10 That ’70s Show 8.55 My Wife and Kids 1.40pm 8 Simple Rules 4.00 Big Brother 5.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away 7.00 100 Per Cent Hotter 8.00 Benefits: Can’t Work, Won’t Work 9.00 On Benefits: Life on the Dole 10.00 When Kids Kill 11.00 The Soap Star Killer: Countdown to Murder 12.00midnight Wentworth Prison 1.00 Wentworth Prison 2.05 Wentworth Prison 3.05 Wentworth Prison 3.55 Access 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping. Home retail.

9.00am Catch a Contractor 9.30 Diagnosis Murder 10.30 Mr & Mrs Murder 1.30pm Film: Columbo: Mind Over Mayhem (PG) Drama, with Peter Falk. 2.55 Film: Columbo: Murder by the Book (PG) Drama, with Peter Falk. 4.35 Film: Columbo: A Matter of Honour (PG) Drama, with Peter Falk. 6.00 NCIS: New Orleans 8.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 11.00 CSI: NY 12.00midnight CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 2.00 CSI: NY 3.00 Law & Order 3.50 Access

Sunday 24 July 2016

ITV2 6.00am The Cube 6.50 Emmerdale 10.00 Coronation Street 12.50pm Take Me Out 1.50 Catchphrase 2.30 Film: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989,PG) 4.20 Film: King Kong (2005,12) 7.55 Film: The Wedding Planner (2001,PG) 10.00 Family Guy 11.30 Bordertown 12.00midnight American Dad! ITV3 6.00am Movies Now 6.10 On the Buses 6.35 Wycliffe 7.30 Heartbeat 9.35 Inspector Morse 11.55 A Touch of Frost 2.10pm Film: Agatha (1979,PG) 3.15 FYI Daily 3.20 Film: Agatha (1979,PG) 4.10 Film: Blue Murder at St Trinian’s (1957,PG) 6.00 Sunday Night at the Palladium 7.00 Doc Martin 8.00 The Booze Cruise 10.10 Film: Steptoe and Son (1972,PG) 12.15am Wire in the Blood 3.00 May the Best House Win 4.45 On the Buses ITV4 6.00am Tommy Cooper 6.25 Ax Men 8.55 MotoGP Highlights 9.55 Monster Carp 11.00 The Motorbike Show 12.00noon Tour de France Highlights 1.00 Tour de France Live. The final stage of this year’s race. 7.00 The Wine Show 8.00 Storage Wars 9.00 Tour de France Highlights 10.00 Film: Unforgiven (1992,15) 12.40am Motorway Patrol 1.10 Tour de France Highlights 2.10 Hell on Wheels 2.50 ITV4 Nightscreen BBC Four 7.00pm BBC Proms 2016: A Child of Our Time 8.15 Playing Beethoven’s Fifth 9.00 Classic Albums: The Beach Boys – Pet Sounds 10.00 Arena: 1966 – 50 Years Ago Today 11.00 Definitely Dusty 12.00midnight The Secret Life of Waves 1.00 Yellowstone 2.00 Classic Albums: The Beach Boys – Pet Sounds 3.00 Arena: 1966 – 50 Years Ago Today 4.00 Close Sky 1 6.00am Hour of Power 7.00 Monkey Life 9.00 Futurama 11.00 WWE: Raw 12.00noon Star Trek Beyond: Special 12.30 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 1.00 Don’t Tell the Bride 2.00 Four Weddings 3.00 Battle of the Brides 4.00 Modern Family 6.00 The Simpsons 8.00 The Last Ship 9.00 Zoo 10.00 Ross Kemp: Extreme World 11.00 The Force: Manchester 12.00midnight Brit Cops: Law & Disorder Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am The Petrol Age 7.00 Networks of Power with Sir Christopher Meyer 8.00 The West Wing 1.00pm David Attenborough’s Kingdom of Plants 2.00 Without a Trace 6.00 Cold Case 9.00 Ray Donovan 10.10 Film: The Normal Heart (2014,15) 12.50am Curb Your Enthusiasm 2.00 Cold Case Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Maya the Bee Movie (2014,U) 7.35 Star Trek Beyond: Special 8.05 Solace (2015,15) 10.05 Maya the Bee Movie (2014,U) 11.40 Ant-Man (2015,12) 1.50pm McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 4.05 Alex Zane’s Cinecast 4.25 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 6.00 Ant-Man (2015,12) 8.00 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 10.15 Crimson Peak (2015,15) 12.20am Tangerines (2013,15) FIlm4 11.00am Sunshine on Leith (2013,PG) 1.00pm Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989,U) 2.50 Dunston Checks In (1996,PG) 4.35 Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian (2009,PG) 6.45 Ender’s Game (2013,12) 9.00 Die Hard (1988,18) 11.40 The Others (2001,12) 1.45am Cedar Rapids (2011,15) 3.35 Close CBS ACTIon 8.30am Tomorrow’s World 9.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 2.00pm The High Chaparral 4.00 Dr Quinn: Medicine Woman 6.00 Film: The Gambler, the Girl and the Gunslinger (2009,PG) 8.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 9.00 NCIS 2.00am Nash Bridges CBS reAlITy 6.00am Teleshopping 7.30 Tomorrow’s World 8.00 The Key of David 8.30 The Lord’s Challenge 9.00 Judge Judy 5.00pm Unsolved Mysteries 7.00 Hoarders 9.00 Snapped: Killer Couples 3.00am Teleshopping 4.00 Rapid Response 4.25 Heir Hunters Sky SPorTS 1 6.00am Football Gold 7.00 World Matchplay Darts 10.00 International Champions Cup Football 11.00 Sporting Triumphs 11.15 Sky Scholars: Mark English 11.20 Sky Scholars: Olivia Breen 11.30 Live Formula 112.00noon Live Formula 1 12.30 Live Formula 1 3.30 Live Formula 1. Updates following the Hungarian Grand Prix. 4.15 Sky Scholars: Mark English 4.20 Sky Scholars: Olivia Breen 4.30 Premier League 100 Club 5.00 Time of Our Lives 6.00 Darts Gold 7.00 Live World Matchplay Darts 9.00 Darts Gold 9.30 Sporting Triumphs 9.45 Sky Scholars: Mark English 9.50 Sky Scholars: Olivia Breen 10.00 Live International Champions Cup Football 12.00midnight World Matchplay Darts

BBC 1

EastEnders, 8pm 6.00

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 9.15 Countryside 999 (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 Neighbourhood Blues (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 Bargain Hunt (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 BBC News At One, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 1.30 Local News, (T) Weather (W) 1.45 Red Rock (T) (W) (HD) 2.25 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.25 Garden Rescue (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Flog It! (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Pointless Celebrities. Alexander Armstrong presents a Blue Peter edition. (rpt) (HD)

6.00 BBC NEWS aT SIx, WEaTHER (W) (HD) 6.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (T) 7.00 THE oNE SHoW Topical reports, hosted

by Alex Jones and Matt Baker. (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 RIp oFF BRITaIN The team unravels an elaborate con that saw a woman tricked into believing she was working undercover for the police to help catch the very fraudsters targeting her money. (T) (W) (HD) Followed by BBC News, (T) Local News. (W) (HD) 8.00 EaSTENdERS Louise tries to take pressure off Phil by looking after the Arches, only to realise she is out of her depth. Mick and Buster guide Lee through his concerns about fatherhood. (T) (HD) 8.30 BRITaIN’S MISSINg youNg pEopLE – paNoRaMa Darragh MacIntyre reports on the hundreds of young people who go missing in Britain every day, meeting families searching for clues to the whereabouts of their loved ones. (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 FoRCES oF NaTuRE WITH BRIaN Cox (4/4) The physicist examines the effects of light interacting with the Earth, revealing how the different rays from the sun transform the plains of the Serengeti. (HD) 10.00 BBC NEWS aT TEN, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.45 HaVE I goT oLd NEWS FoR you (4/9) Michael Sheen hosts an edition from October 2015, with comedian Jon Richardson and Ruth Davidson MSP joining Ian Hislop and Paul Merton to poke fun at that week’s events. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.15 HaVE I goT a BIT MoRE oLd NEWS FoR you (9/11) Charlotte Church hosts an extended edition of the quiz from December 2012, with Miles Jupp and Richard Osman joining regulars Ian Hislop and Paul Merton. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) (HD) 12.05 BBC News. All the latest headlines. (T) (W) (HD)

BBC 2

only Connect, 8.30pm 6.00

Right On The Money (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 6.45 Garden Rescue (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 The Hairy Builder (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 Sign Zone: Close Calls: On Camera (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 8.30 Sign Zone: Gardeners’ World (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 Nature’s Miracle Babies (rpt) (T) (W) 1.00 Pressure Pad (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.45 Sailing (T) (W) 2.45 Coast (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 2.50 An Island Parish: Falklands (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.20 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.45 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Michael Palin’s New Europe (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Antiques Roadshow (rpt) (HD)

IT V

Coronation Street, 7.30pm 6.00

Good Morning Britain (W) (HD) 8.30 Lorraine (W) (HD) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.30 This Morning (W) (HD) 12.30 Loose Women (W) (HD) 1.30 ITV News, Weather (W) 1.55 Local News, Weather (W) 2.00 Judge Rinder (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (W) (HD) 3.59 Local Weather (W) 4.00 Tipping Point (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.00 The Chase (rpt) (W) (HD)

6.00 EggHEadS (80/100) Jeremy Vine hosts the quiz show in which the winners of famous gameshows work as a team to tackle a new set of challengers hoping to win a cash prize. (T) (W) (HD) 6.30 THE HaIRy BuILdER Dave Myers helps restore Sunderland’s Roker pier and lighthouse, discovering the perils of restoring a round building and climbing to the very top to polish the lantern. (T) (W) (HD) 7.00 gREaT aMERICaN RaILRoad JouRNEyS (1/8) Michael Portillo examines the history of the US rail network, beginning on Manhattan Island and travelling from Grand Central Terminal to the site of Ground Zero. (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 uNIVERSITy CHaLLENgE (3/37) Liverpool takes on Warwick. (T) (W) (HD) 8.30 oNLy CoNNECT (3/37) Three PG Wodehouse fans take on a trio of wordsmiths. (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 THE SoMME 1916 – FRoM BoTH SIdES oF THE WIRE (2/3) Peter Barton examines the battle from the middle of July to mid-September, revealing that the slowness of the Allied advance led to the emergence of a new German tactic. (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 RHod gILBERT’S WoRk ExpERIENCE (3/4) Rhod attempts to coach a rugby union team. (HD) 10.30 NEWSNIgHT, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) 11.15 THE WoMEN’S FooTBaLL SHoW Tina Daheley reflects on the best of the weekend’s action from the FA WSL. (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 RoBoT WaRS Revival of the series in which radio-controlled robots battle it out. (rpt) (T) (HD)

6.00 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 7.00 EMMERdaLE Chrissie is furious after finding out the truth about the shooting, but later decides to try and make peace – but by this point, Andy is drunkenly seeking solace in Bernice’s arms. (HD) 7.30 CoRoNaTIoN STREET Leanne suffers stomach pains and Simon is concerned it is the baby, while Jenny decides to give Johnny another chance, but is gutted by his decision. (W) (HD) 8.00 WILd FRaNCE WITH Ray MEaRS (3/6) Ray travels to the Camargue in the south of the country, a vast wetland that includes ancient salt pans, huge expanses of river delta, inland salt-water lakes and reed beds. (W) (HD) 8.30 CoRoNaTIoN STREET Michelle confides in Steve about Leanne’s pregnancy and suggests they should have a baby, while Johnny is jealous when he spots Jenny having a drink with a client. (W) (HD) 9.00 BRIEF ENCouNTERS (4/6) At a recruitment fair at the community centre, Steph chats to the caretaker and agrees to go to his house to talk to his wife about hosting a party – a decision that may have far-reaching consequences. Dawn has to think seriously about her future when Russell tells her he can’t cope with all the fuss she is making over their wedding preparations, while Nita puts her family first and gives Kieran an alibi for the hit-and-run. (HD) 10.00 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.35 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.45 BENIdoRM (3/7) Liam decides he has fallen in love with Bianca, Donald and Jacqueline receive sad news about their friend Big Donna and Martin Weedon arrives at the resort for a stag do. (rpt) (W) (HD) 11.45 IN pLaIN SIgHT (11/13) Mary protects a deeply remorseful army veteran. (rpt) (W) (HD)

12.45 Sign Zone: Celebrity MasterChef (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 1.45 Sign Zone: Mr Vs Mrs: Call The Mediator (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 2.45 This Is BBC Two. Upcoming programmes. (W) (HD)

12.30 Jackpot247. Live interactive gaming. (W) 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.55 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD) 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (SL) (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

BBC1 WaLES As BBC1 except: 7.30-8.00 X-Ray on Holiday 10.40 City Road 11.10 Have I Got Old News for You. Actor Michael Sheen hosts an edition of the quiz from October 2015, with comedian Jon Richardson and Scottish Conservatives leader Ruth Davidson MSP joining Ian Hislop and Paul Merton to poke fun at that week’s events. 11.40 Have I Got a Bit More Old News for You. Singer Charlotte Church hosts an extended edition of the quiz from December 2012, with News Quiz presenter Miles Jupp and Pointless co-host Richard Osman joining regulars Ian Hislop and Paul Merton to take a sideways look at the news from that week.

12.25 Weather For The Week Ahead 12.30-6.00 BBC News

ITV WaLES As ITV WEST except: 8.00-8.30 Wales This Week.

Nicola Hendy joins fire crews to see the dangers they face due to deliberate grass fires in the South Wales valleys and looks at what is being done to try and stop the arsonists.

S4C 7.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 7.10 Cyw: Heini 7.25 Cyw: Ty Mel 7.35 Cyw: Sbridiri 7.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 8.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 8.15 Cyw: Bla Bla Blewog 8.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 8.40 Cyw: Boj 8.50 Cyw: Bing 9.00 Cyw: Twt 9.10 Cyw: Y Diwrnod Mawr 9.25 Cyw: Tomos a’i Ffrindiau 9.35 Cyw: Marcaroni 9.50 Cyw: Nodi 10.05 Cyw: Y Dywysoges Fach 10.15 Cyw: Y Brodyr Coala 10.25 Cyw: Cwpwrdd Cadi 10.35 Cyw: Sara a Cwac 10.45 Cyw: Dwylo’r Enfys 11.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 11.10 Cyw: Heini 11.25 Cyw: Ty Mel

11.35 Cyw: Sbridiri 11.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 12.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 12.15 Cyw: Bla Bla Blewog 12.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 12.40 Cyw: Boj 12.50 Cyw: Bing 1.00 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 1.05 Fy Nhad y Swltan 2.00 Prynhawn Da 2.55 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 3.00 Pethe: Stori Coronau y ‘Steddfod 3.30 3 Lle 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: Newid Byd 5.25 Stwnsh: Dreigiau – Marchogion Berc 5.50 Stwnsh: Angelo am Byth 6.00 Pobol y Cwm 6.25 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 6.30 Ysgol Ddawns Anti Karen.

The dancers attend the Urdd Eisteddfod in Flint, with Karen having high hopes for under 12 team Fflamau’r Ddraig. 7.00 Heno 8.00 Pobol y Cwm 8.25 Cefn Gwlad 9.00 Newyddion 9 a’r Tywydd 9.30 Ffermio 10.00 Euro 2016: Merci Cymru 11.00-12.05 Yr Ynys

CHANNEL 4

eden, 9pm 6.10

Dare To Believe: Lauren Steadman (rpt) 6.15 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 6.40 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.05 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.30 Frasier (rpt) 9.00 Frasier (rpt) 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 9.55 Dare To Believe: Ali Jawad (rpt) (HD) 10.00 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) 10.30 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.00 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.30 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 12.00 Channel 4 News (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 2.05 Dare To Believe: Georgie Hermitage (rpt) (HD) 2.10 Fifteen To One (HD) 3.10 Countdown (HD) 4.00 The Question Jury (HD) 5.00 Couples Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD)

6.00 The SImPSonS Mr Burns denies his employees any more free medication, so Homer whisks Grampa away on a drug-smuggling mission to Canada. (rpt) 6.30 hollyoAkS Sienna tries to stop Warren leaving the village by tempting him with the thought of Maxine being sent to prison. (HD) 7.00 ChAnnel 4 newS Latest headlines. (HD) 8.00 how SChool BoSSeS SPend your mIllIonS: ChAnnel 4 dISPATCheS Antony Barnett investigates the finances of the academy school system and discovers large salaries and generous expenses being paid out of trusts funded by taxpayers’ money. (HD) 8.30 SuPerFoodS: The reAl STory (5/6) Kate Quilton tests the muscle-healing properties of cherries with players from amateur American football team NY Predators. She also investigates if spinach really can boost biceps like in Popeye. (HD) 9.00 eden Anton is confronted by some of the group for spending too much of his time building his cabin, while there are further differences over how much work people are prepared to do. (HD) 10.00 new nAked ATTrACTIon Dating show SerIeS hosted by Anna Richardson in which two singletons choose a date from a selection of six. (HD) 11.05 rAmSAy’S hoTel hell (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Bodyshockers: Nips, Tucks And Tattoos (rpt) (HD) 12.55 Dare To Believe: Jack Rutter (rpt) (HD) 1.00 The Secret Life Of Brothers And Sisters (rpt) (HD) 1.55 Our Guy In Latvia (rpt) (HD) 2.50 Grand Designs Australia 3.45 Superfoods: The Real Story (rpt) 4.15 French Collection (rpt) 5.10 Kirstie’s Vintage Gems (rpt) 5.20 Fifteen To One (rpt) (HD)

CHANNEL 5

neighbours, 1.45pm & 5.30pm 6.00

Milkshake! The WotWots (rpt) 6.10 Chloe’s Closet (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Lily’s Driftwood Bay (rpt) (HD) 6.30 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 6.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.45 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Little Princess (rpt) 7.10 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Thomas & Friends (rpt) (HD) 7.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.05 Wissper (HD) 8.15 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.25 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.35 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Toot The Tiny Tugboat (rpt) (HD) 9.00 Bananas In Pyjamas (rpt) 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD) 11.15 To B&B The Best (HD) 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (HD) 12.15 Big Brother (rpt) (HD) 1.15 Home And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 NCIS (rpt) 3.15 FILM: Perfect Seduction (2015) Premiere. Thriller, starring Adrienne Frantz. (HD) 5.00 5 News At 5 (HD) 5.30 Neighbours (rpt) (HD)

6.00 home And AwAy Nate invites Brax to Summer Bay after realising his marriage to Ricky is over, Evelyn is staggered when Josh confesses his guilt and Ash betrays Kat to help him go underground. (rpt) (HD) 6.30 5 newS TonIghT Latest headlines. (HD) 7.00 CrICkeT on 5 England v Pakistan. Mark Nicholas presents action from day four of the second Test in the four-match series, which took place at Old Trafford. (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 8.00 PolICe InTerCePTorS unleAShed (2/10) Vinnie Jones introduces clips of high-speed police chases, featuring an off-road runaround and a drink-driver who crashes his car into a house. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 9.00 CAn’T PAy? we’ll TAke IT AwAy: BuSTed (10/20) Steve and Ben visit a tenant who owes £14,000 in unpaid rent, while Brian and Del chase a debt of over £10,000 owed to a van rental business for damaged vehicles. (HD) 10.00 BIg BroTher Marcus Bentley narrates a round-up of the latest events. With the final just around the corner, the reality residents who have made it this far start to celebrate their time together and look back on their shared experience. (HD) 11.05 BIg BroTher’S BIT on The SIde Rylan Clark-Neal looks ahead to the final. (HD) 12.05 Autopsy: Bobbi Kristina Brown (rpt) (HD) 1.00 SuperCasino 3.10 Person Of Interest (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Violent Assault: Caught On Camera (rpt) (SL) (HD) 4.45 Divine Designs (rpt) (SL) 5.10 House Doctor (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

5STAr

5uSA

6.00am Teleshopping 8.10 That ’70s Show 9.10 Film: Madeline (1998) (U) 11.00 That ’70s Show 12.00noon My Wife and Kids 12.30 My Wife and Kids 1.00 Dance Moms 2.00 Big Brother 3.00 Neighbours 3.30 Home and Away 4.00 8 Simple Rules 5.00 Big Brother 6.00 Neighbours 6.30 Home and Away 7.00 Dance Moms 8.00 On Benefits: Life on the Dole 9.00 Film: Jumper (2008) (12) 10.50 Film: Takers (2010) (12) 1.00am The Magicians 1.55 Strip Date 3.00 Yosemite Park Slayer: Born to Kill?

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Mr & Mrs Murder 10.00 Access 10.10 Film: Broken Trust (2012) (15) Thriller, starring Laura Vandervoort. 12.00noon CSI: Miami 1.00 NCIS 2.00 Person of Interest 3.00 Person of Interest 4.00 NCIS 5.00 CSI: NY 6.00 CSI: Miami 7.00 NCIS 8.00 NCIS 9.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 10.00 NCIS: New Orleans 11.00 NCIS: New Orleans. A top pilot dies when her state-ofthe-art aircraft crashes. 12.00midnight CSI: Miami 1.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 2.00 CSI: NY 3.00 CSI: NY

Monday 25 July 2016

ITV2 7.10am The Ellen DeGeneres Show 8.00 Emmerdale 8.30 Coronation Street 9.30 Psych 10.20 Royal Pains 11.15 Dinner Date 12.15pm Emmerdale 12.45 Coronation Street 1.45 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 7.00 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed! 8.00 Two and a Half Men 9.00 Family Guy 9.30 Bordertown 10.00 Family Guy 10.30 American Dad! 11.30 The Cleveland Show 12.30am Two and a Half Men 1.20 The Vampire Diaries 2.10 The Hot Desk: Ella Henderson ITV3 6.25am Heartbeat 7.30 Where the Heart Is 8.25 The Royal 9.25 Judge Judy 10.50 Murder, She Wrote 11.55 Love Your Garden 12.55pm Heartbeat 2.00 The Royal 3.00 Where the Heart Is 4.10 Doctor in the House 4.40 On the Buses 5.15 Man About the House 5.50 Heartbeat 6.55 Murder, She Wrote 7.55 Wycliffe 9.00 Secrets from the Asylum 10.00 Law & Order: UK 11.00 Liverpool 1 12.15am Blue Murder 1.10 Marchlands ITV4 6.00am Gunsmoke 6.50 Minder 7.45 Ironside 8.50 Quincy ME 9.50 Ax Men 10.45 The Chase 11.45 Gunsmoke 12.50pm Tour de France Highlights 1.50 The Saint 2.50 Minder 3.55 Quincy ME 5.00 Ironside 6.00 The Saint 7.00 Pawn Stars 8.00 River Monsters 9.00 Film: Escape from New York (1981,15) 11.05 Film: Open Range (2003,12) 1.50 Motorsport UK BBC Four 7.00pm World News 7.30 The Wonder of Animals 8.00 Timeshift: The Nation’s Railway: The Golden Age of British Rail 9.00 Norman Wisdom: His Story 10.00 The Real White Queen and Her Rivals 11.00 The Joy of Data 12.00midnight A History of Art in Three Colours 1.00 Who Were the Greeks?

Sky 1 6.00am Monkey Life 8.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 9.00 Futurama 10.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 12.00noon Hawaii Five-0 1.00 Supergirl 2.00 The Flash 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.00 David Attenborough’s Galapagos 9.00 A League of Their Own 10.00 Film: Underworld: Evolution (2006,18) 12.00midnight NCIS: Los Angeles 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am The British 7.00 The Guest Wing 8.00 Cold Case 10.00 The West Wing 11.00 House 12.00noon Without a Trace 1.00 Blue Bloods 2.00 Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets 3.00 Cold Case 5.00 The West Wing 6.00 House 7.00 Without a Trace 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 Ray Donovan 10.10 Last Week Tonight with John Oliver 10.45 Requiem For The Dead: An American Spring 2014 12.05am Ray Donovan Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 7.35 Wolves (2014,18) 9.10 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 11.20 Maya the Bee Movie (2014,U) 12.55pm Solace (2015,15) 2.50 Ant-Man (2015,12) 4.50 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 6.25 Wolves (2014,18) 8.00 Ant-Man (2015,12) 10.00 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 12.15am Jeruzalem (2015,15) 1.55 White Bird in a Blizzard (2014,15) FIlm4 11.00am Millions (2004,12) 12.55pm August Rush (2007,PG) 3.10 Mysterious Island (1961,PG) 5.15 The Perfect Catch (2005,PG) 7.20 Vehicle 19 (2013,12) 9.00 Die Hard 2 (1990,18) 11.20 Lawless (2012,18) Tom Hardy stars. 1.35am Crash (2004,15) CBS ACTIon 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 JAG 10.00 MacGyver 11.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 12.00noon Star Trek 1.00 Bonanza 2.00 NCIS 4.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 5.00 JAG 6.00 Star Trek 7.00 MacGyver 8.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Bad Girls 10.50 Walker, Texas Ranger 11.45 NCIS 2.30am The Streets of San Francisco 3.30 Walker, Texas Ranger CBS reAlITy 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Judge Judy 10.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 11.00 Unsolved Mysteries 12.00noon Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction?

1.00 Judge Judy 3.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 4.00 Unsolved Mysteries 5.00 Judge Judy 7.00 Medical Detectives 8.00 Troubled Teens: Jail Shock 9.00 Cold Blood 10.00 24 Hours to Kill 11.00 Medical Detectives 12.00midnight I Survived 1.00 Cold Blood Sky SPorTS 1 7.00am WWE: Raw 8.00 World Matchplay Darts 10.00 Darts Gold 11.00 International Champions Cup Football 1.00pm Premier League Years 2.55 Live Test Cricket 10.00 International Champions Cup Football 12.30am Premier League Years

BBC 1

The Living and The dead, 9pm 6.00

6.00 6.30 7.00 7.30

8.00

9.00

10.00 10.30 10.45

11.50

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 9.15 Countryside 999 (rpt) (HD) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 Neighbourhood Blues (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 Bargain Hunt (rpt) (HD) 1.00 BBC News At One, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 1.30 Local News, (T) Weather (W) 1.45 Red Rock (T) (W) (HD) 2.25 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.25 Garden Rescue (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Flog It! (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Pointless Celebrities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

BBc NEWS aT SIx, WEaTHER (W) (HD) LocaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) THE oNE SHoW Live chat and topical reports. (T) EaSTENdERS Phil learns the truth about recent events, Billy tells Jay he cannot help at the Arches and Lee admits his fatherhood fears to Martin. Jack tries to iron out Richard’s bad habits. (T) (W) (HD) Followed by BBC News, (T) Local News. (W) (HD) HoLBy cITy (42/52) Ollie is contacted about a job in Pakistan, but when he clashes with Guy on another case and Mo refuses to take his side, he begins to ask some serious questions about his place – and his future – at Holby. Morven braces herself for her first day back at work following Arthur’s death, and her confidence receives a knock when one of her old patients turns up on the ward.

Meanwhile, Essie urges Dom not to let his past experiences hold him back. (T) (W) (HD) THE LIVINg aNd THE dEad (5/6) Murderous apparitions stalk the village as All Hallows Eve arrives, and an increasingly unhinged Nathan believes only the bitterly sceptical Reverend Denning can save Shepzoy. (T) (W) (HD) BBc NEWS aT TEN, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) LocaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) Followed by National Lottery Update. (T) (W) IMagINE – gEoRgIa o’kEEFFE: By MySELF The arts documentary retells the story of Georgia O’Keeffe, America’s first great modernist painter, and the subject of a major new retrospective at the Tate Modern. (T) (W) (HD) FoRcES oF NaTuRE WITH BRIaN cox (4/4) The physicist examines the effects of light interacting with the Earth, revealing how the different rays from the sun transform the plains of the Serengeti. (rpt) (T) Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead. (HD)

12.55 BBC News. Catch up with all the latest headlines. (T) (HD)

BBC 2

New Zealand: Earth’s Mythical Islands, 9pm 6.00

Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 6.45 Garden Rescue (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 The Hairy Builder (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 Sign Zone: An Island Parish: Shetland (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 8.30 Sign Zone: An Island Parish: Shetland (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 The Super League Show (T) (W) 12.45 FILM: Merrill’s Marauders (1962) Fact-based Second World War adventure, starring Jeff Chandler. (T) (W) (HD) 2.20 Africa (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.20 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.45 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Michael Palin’s New Europe (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Antiques Roadshow (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

6.00 EggHEadS (81/100) Quiz show. (T) (W) (HD) 6.30 THE HaIRy BuILdER Dave Myers visits Bramall Hall in Stockport, Greater Manchester. (T) (W) (HD) 7.00 gREaT aMERIcaN RaILRoad JouRNEyS (2/8) Michael Portillo heads east from Manhattan to Brooklyn, and takes the Long Island Railroad to Queens. He then visits Oheka Castle before concluding this leg at Montauk lighthouse. (T) (HD) 8.00 NEW INSIdE THE FacToRy: HoW ouR SERIES FaVouRITE FoodS aRE MadE (1/6) Gregg Wallace and Cherry Healey return with the series shedding light on the production of Britain’s favourite foods, begin with breakfast cereals. (HD) 9.00 NEW ZEaLaNd: EaRTH’S MyTHIcaL ISLaNdS Sam Neill reveals creatures including hyper-intelligent parrots and snails with teeth ensure in some of New Zealand’s wildest locales, including the Southern Alps on South Island. (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Mock THE WEEk (2/13) Guests James Acaster, Dane Baptiste, Rob Beckett, Ed Byrne and Holly Walsh join host Dara O Briain and regular Hugh Dennis for the topical comedy show. (rpt) (T) (HD) 10.30 NEWSNIgHT, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) 11.15 dRagoNS’ dEN (1/16) Evan Davis presents the business ideas contest, with regular panellists Deborah Meaden, Peter Jones, Sarah Willingham, Touker Suleyman and Nick Jenkins returning to assess the profit-making potential of the contestants’ grand plans. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 The Refugee Camp: Our Desert Home (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.15 Sign Zone: Celebrity MasterChef (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 2.45 Sign Zone: Exodus: Our Journey To Europe (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 3.40 This Is BBC Two (T) (W) (HD)

IT V

Love your garden, 8pm 6.00

Good Morning Britain (W) (HD) 8.30 Lorraine (W) (HD) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.30 This Morning (W) (HD) 12.30 Loose Women (W) (HD) 1.30 ITV News, Weather (W) 1.55 Local News, Weather (W) 2.00 Judge Rinder (W) (HD) 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (W) (HD) 3.59 ITV Local Weather (W) 4.00 Tipping Point (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.00 The Chase (rpt) (W) (HD)

6.00 LocaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 7.00 EMMERdaLE Lachlan leaves the house abruptly on his birthday morning, but returns carrying a loaded shotgun, determined to make Lawrence apologise to Chrissie. However, the confrontation goes tragically wrong. Holly displays her photos, but something in the background of one image reveals a secret. Harriet and Rhona try to push Marlon and Carly together, and Rakesh is tempted to finally tell Priya the truth. (W) (HD) 8.00 LoVE youR gaRdEN (5/6) Alan Titchmarsh and his team visit Eastleigh, near Southampton, to transform an uneven patch of lawn into a cruise ship-inspired pleasure garden complete with a patio shaped like the prow of a boat. The project is intended as a “thank you” to paediatric nurse Rosie Mitchell, whose nominees claim she has gone above and beyond the call of duty for 30 years in support of her young patients. (W) (HD) 9.00 NEW HoLIday HoRRoRS: caugHT oN SERIES caMERa Jamie Theakston narrates cringe-worthy clips of relaxing getaways that turned sour, beginning with a walk in the woods that suddenly became a fight for survival. (W) (HD) 10.00 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.30 LocaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.40 daVINa MccaLL: LIFE aT THE ExTREME (4/4) Davina travels to the Costa Rican jungle, observing sloths, poison dart frogs, tarantulas and tapirs and spending a night in the treetops of the rainforest. Last in the series. (rpt) (W) (HD) 11.40 IN PLaIN SIgHT (12/13) Mary discovers witness Grace Haddick is pregnant by her gangster ex-lover and poses as the woman’s life partner to protect her from the mobster. (rpt) (W) (HD) 12.30 Jackpot247. Live interactive gaming. (W) 3.00 Loose Women (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD) 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (SL) (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

BBc1 WaLES As BBC1 except: 10.45 Countryside Cops 11.25 Imagine – Georgia O’Keeffe: By Myself 12.30 Forces of Nature with Brian Cox 1.30 Weather for the Week Ahead 1.35-6.00 BBC News BBc1 ScoTLaNd As BBC1 except: 8.00-9.00 River City BBc2 WaLES As BBC2 except: 7.00 Welsh Heartland: The Llyn Peninsula 7.30-8.00 Cardigan Bay Coastal Lives BBc2 ScoTLaNd As BBC2 except: 7.00-8.00 The Scottish National Trail. Cameron McNeish starts a journey along a new route linking Kirk Yetholm in the Borders with Cape Wrath, the most north-westerly point of the mainland. In the first of two programmes he walks the southern half of the 470-mile trail.

BBc2 NoRTHERN IRELaNd As BBC2 except: 10.00-10.30 Minding Our Language. Tim McGarry explores the history of the Scots language, going back to its origins in dark ages Northumbria. He discovers how this minority dialect became the dominant language of the previously Gaelic-speaking Scotland in the 14th Century.

S4c 7.00 Cyw: Cled 7.10 Cyw: Straeon Ty Pen 7.25 Cyw: Octonots 7.35 Cyw: Ben Dant 7.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 8.00 Cyw: Popi’r Gath 8.10 Cyw: Meic y Marchog 8.25 Cyw: Cymylaubychain 8.35 Cyw: Sam Tân 8.45 Cyw: Peppa 8.55 Cyw: Pingu 9.00 Cyw: Cwpwrdd Cadi 9.15 Cyw: Stiw 9.25 Cyw: Tomos a’i Ffrindiau 9.50 Cyw: Abadas 10.00 Cyw: Y Dywysoges Fach 10.10 Cyw: Mwnci’n Dweud Mwnci’n Gwneud 10.20 Cyw: ABC 10.35 Cyw: Igam Ogam 10.45

Cyw: Pentre Bach 11.00 Cyw: Cled 11.10 Cyw: Straeon Ty Pen 11.25 Cyw: Octonots 11.35 Cyw: Ben Dant 11.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 12.00 Cyw: Popi’r Gath 12.10 Cyw: Meic y Marchog 12.25 Cyw: Cymylaubychain 12.35 Cyw: Sam Tân 12.45 Cyw: Peppa 12.55 Cyw: Pingu 1.00 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 1.05 Heno 2.00 Prynhawn Da 2.55 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 3.00 Llangollen 2016 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: FM 5.25 Stwnsh: Pat a Stan 5.35 Stwnsh: Arwyr 999 6.00 Pobol y Cwm 6.25 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 6.30 Lle Aeth Pawb? Tarsans Trawsfynydd 7.00 Heno 7.30 Y Tyrchwyr gyda Iolo Williams 8.00 Pobol y Cwm 8.25 Stori Allison 9.00 Newyddion 9 a’r Tywydd 9.30 Her Yr Hinsawdd 10.00 Y Sioe 2016 11.00-12.05 Codi Gôl

CHANNEL 4

Child Genius, 8pm 6.15

3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 6.40 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.05 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.30 Frasier (rpt) 9.00 Frasier (rpt) 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 10.00 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 10.30 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.00 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.25 Dare To Believe: Natasha Baker (rpt) (HD) 11.30 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.35 Glorious Goodwood: Channel 4 Racing (HD) 4.00 The Question Jury 5.00 Couples Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD)

6.00 The SImPSonS A health inspector eats a pickled egg at Moe’s and instantly drops dead, prompting the authorities to threaten closure, so Homer decides to offer his friend financial support. (rpt) 6.30 hollyoAkS Warren pushes Maxine for more information, while Peri and Nico are trapped n a bunker. Meanwhile, Marnie cancels the model for the photo shoot at the salon. (HD) 7.00 ChAnnel 4 neWS Latest headlines. (HD) 8.00 ChIlD GenIuS (3/4) Richard Osman hosts as the 10 remaining contestants enter the semi-finals, which include a ‘Language & Comprehension’ round and a gruelling spelling test. (HD) 9.00 The JoB InTerVIeW Cameras follow interviewees as they apply for jobs with On Air Dining, which caters for the private jets of millionaires, and Birmingham-based digital marketing company Wowzone. (HD) 10.00 CeleBrITy FIrST DATeS Four more celebrities go in search of romance with members of the public. Brad Simpson, lead singer of boy band The Vamps, Atomic Kitten’s Natasha Hamilton, fellow pop star Ritchie Neville, the father of her fourth child, and Bernie Clifton, mainstay of 1970s and 1980s TV, are all looking for love. (rpt) (HD) 11.05 999: WhAT’S your emerGenCy? (rpt) (HD) 12.10 Music on 4: Live From Abbey Road Classics (HD) 12.40 Music on 4: Lovebox Festival 2016 1.35 Dare To Believe: Jordanne Whiley (rpt) (HD) 1.40 KOTV Boxing Weekly 2.05 The Grid (rpt) 2.35 Gillette World Sport (rpt) 3.00 Tenerife Bluetrail (rpt) (HD) 3.30 British Rally Championship (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Dare To Believe: Georgie Hermitage (rpt) (HD) 4.05 French Collection (rpt) (HD) 5.00 Countdown (rpt) (HD) 5.40 Kirstie’s Fill Your House For Free (rpt) (HD) 5.50 Draw It! (rpt) (HD)

CHANNEL 5

The Dog rescuers With Alan Davies, 8pm 6.00

Milkshake! The WotWots (rpt) 6.10 Chloe’s Closet (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Lily’s Driftwood Bay (rpt) (HD) 6.30 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 6.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.45 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Little Princess (rpt) 7.10 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Thomas & Friends (rpt) 7.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.05 Wissper (HD) 8.15 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.25 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.35 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Toot The Tiny Tugboat (rpt) (HD) 9.00 Bananas In Pyjamas (rpt) 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD) 11.15 To B&B The Best (HD) 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (HD) 12.15 Big Brother (rpt) (HD) 1.15 Home And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 NCIS (rpt) (HD) 3.15 FILM: A Bone To Pick: An Aurora Teagarden Mystery (2015) Mystery, starring Candace Cameron Bure. (HD) 5.00 5 News 5.30 Neighbours (rpt) (HD)

6.00 home AnD AWAy Josh resolves to hand himself in for murder, Ricky decides to leave Summer Bay and start afresh with Brax and Casey, and the Morgan brothers make their presence known. (rpt) (HD) 6.30 5 neWS TonIGhT Latest headlines. (HD) 7.00 CrICkeT on 5 England v Pakistan. Mark Nicholas presents action from day five of the second Test in the four-match series, which took place at Old Trafford. Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 8.00 The DoG reSCuerS WITh AlAn DAVIeS (6/16) Annie Simmonds investigates when an underweight and heavily pregnant dog is brought in to the hospital, and Anthony Pulfer catches up with an American bulldog re-homed last year. (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 9.00 BIG BroTher: lIVe FInAl Weeks of confinement come to their natural conclusion, as Emma Willis reveals which of the housemates will be crowned the winner. Last in the series. (HD) Includes The Health Lottery draw at 9.55pm.

10.50 BIG BroTher’S BIT on The SIDe Rylan Clark-Neal talks to the winner and runners-up about their time in the BB house and Emma Willis drops in to give her thoughts on the final. (HD) 11.50 BoTCheD uP BoDIeS (1/3) Some of Britain’s leading plastic surgeons work to rectify more botched cosmetic procedures. (rpt) (HD) 12.45 Lip Sync Battle (HD) 1.10 SuperCasino 3.10 Person Of Interest (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Fire Starter: Caught In The Act (rpt) (SL) (HD) 4.45 Great Scientists (rpt) (SL) (HD) 5.10 House Doctor (rpt) (SL) 5.35 House Doctor (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

5STAr

5uSA

6.00am Teleshopping 8.10 That ’70s Show 9.10 Film: Another Cinderella Story (2008) With Selena Gomez.

11.00 That ’70s Show 12.00noon My Wife and Kids 1.00 Dance Moms 2.00 Big Brother 3.00 Neighbours 3.30 Home and Away 4.00 8 Simple Rules 5.00 Big Brother 6.00 Neighbours 6.30 Home and Away 7.00 Dance Moms 8.00 Film: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) (PG) 10.00 Wentworth Prison 11.00 When Kids Kill 12.00midnight The Last Hours of Amy Winehouse 1.00 The Magicians

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Diagnosis Murder 10.00 Access 10.10 Film: My Family’s Secret (2010) (12) Thriller, starring Nicholle Tom. 12.00noon CSI: NY 1.00 NCIS 2.00 Person of Interest 3.00 Person of Interest 4.00 NCIS 5.00 CSI: NY 6.00 CSI: Miami 7.00 NCIS 8.00 NCIS 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 11.00 Castle. A detective’s stolen gun is used in a murder.

12.00midnight CSI: Miami 1.00 CSI: Miami 2.00 CSI: NY 3.00 Rookie Blue 3.45 Access 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping

Tuesday 26 July 2016

ITV2 7.10am The Ellen DeGeneres Show 8.00 Emmerdale 8.30 Coronation Street 9.30 Psych 10.20 Royal Pains 11.15 Dinner Date 12.15pm Emmerdale 12.45 Coronation Street 1.45 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 7.00 You’ve Been Framed! 8.00 Two and a Half Men 9.00 Mom 10.00 Celebrity Juice 10.45 Family Guy 11.45 American Dad! 12.45am Two and a Half Men ITV3 7.30am Where the Heart Is 8.25 The Royal 9.30 Judge Judy 10.55 Murder, She Wrote 11.55 Love Your Garden 1.00pm Heartbeat 2.00 The Royal 3.05 Where the Heart Is 4.15 Doctor in the House 4.50 On the Buses 5.20 Man About the House 5.55 Heartbeat 7.00 Murder, She Wrote 8.00 Midsomer Murders 10.00 Law & Order: UK 11.00 Wire in the Blood 12.40am Inspector Morse ITV4 6.50am Minder 7.45 Ironside 8.50 Quincy ME 9.50 Ax Men 10.45 The Chase 11.45 Gunsmoke 12.55pm Pawn Stars 1.50 The Saint 2.50 Minder 3.55 Quincy ME 5.00 Ironside 6.00 The Saint 7.00 Pawn Stars 8.00 Monster Carp 9.00 Film: Universal Soldier: Regeneration (2009,18) 11.00 Film: Born to Raise Hell (2010,18) 12.55am Film: Escape from New York (1981,15) BBC Four 7.00pm World News Today 7.00 Weather 7.30 The Wonder of Animals 8.00 Sacred Wonders of Britain 9.00 Tutankhamun: The Truth Uncovered 10.00 Inside Claridge’s 11.00 Fossil Wonderlands: Nature’s Hidden Treasures 12.00midnight Sacred Wonders of Britain 1.00 A History of Art in Three Colours Sky 1 6.00am Supergirl 7.00 The Flash 9.00 Futurama 10.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 12.00noon Hawaii Five-0 1.00 Supergirl 2.00 The Flash 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.00 Stop, Search, Seize 9.00 Agatha Raisin 10.00 Don’t Tell the Bride 11.00 A League of Their Own 12.00midnight NCIS: Los Angeles 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 2.00 Forever 3.00 Arrow Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am Fish Town 7.00 The Guest Wing 8.00 Cold Case 10.00 The West Wing 11.00 House 12.00noon Without a Trace 1.00 Blue Bloods 2.00 Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets 3.00 Cold Case 5.00 The West Wing 6.00 House 7.00 Without a Trace 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 Ballers 9.35 Vice Principals 10.10 Film: The Wolfpack (2015,15) 11.55 Ballers 12.30am Vice Principals 1.05 Curb Your Enthusiasm Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 7.35 White Bird in a Blizzard (2014,15) 9.20 Maya the Bee Movie (2014,U) 10.55 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 12.30pm Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (2015,15) 2.05 Ant-Man (2015,12) 4.05 Wolves (2014,18) 5.45 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 8.00 Ant-Man (2015,12) 10.00 Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (2015,15) 11.40 Wolves (2014,18) 1.15am Jeruzalem (2015,15) 3.00 Solace (2015,15) FIlm4 11.00am The Rugrats Movie (1999,U) 12.40pm Dragonball Evolution (2009,PG) 2.20 Summer Holiday (1963,U) 4.40 Rat Race (2001,12) 6.55 Tower Heist (2011,12) 9.00 Out of the Furnace (2013,15) 11.15 Law Abiding Citizen (2009,18) 1.25am Gloria (2013,15) CBS ACTIon 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 JAG 10.00 MacGyver 11.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 12.00noon Star Trek 1.00 Bonanza 2.00 NCIS 4.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 5.00 JAG 6.00 Star Trek 7.00 MacGyver 8.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Bad Girls 10.50 Walker, Texas Ranger 11.45 NCIS 2.30am The Streets of San Francisco 3.25 Walker, Texas Ranger CBS reAlITy 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Judge Judy 10.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 11.00 Unsolved Mysteries 12.00noon Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction?

1.00 Judge Judy 3.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 4.00 Unsolved Mysteries 5.00 Judge Judy 7.00 Medical Detectives 8.00 Troubled Teens: Jail Shock 9.00 Cold Blood 10.00 24 Hours to Kill 11.00 Medical Detectives 12.00midnight I Survived 1.00 Cold Blood Sky SPorTS 1 7.00am WWE 8.00 ATP Masters Tennis 9.00 Spanish Football Gold 9.30 Sporting Triumphs 10.15 International Champions Cup Football 1.45 Football’s Greatest Teams 2.15 Football Gold 2.30 Football’s Greatest Players 3.00 ATP Masters Tennis 4.00 Live ATP Masters Tennis 4.00am Football’s Greatest Players

BBC 1

Saving Lives at Sea, 9pm 6.00

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 9.15 Countryside 999 (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 Neighbourhood Blues (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 Bargain Hunt (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 BBC News At One, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 1.30 Local News, (T) Weather (W) 1.45 Red Rock (T) (W) (HD) 2.25 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.25 Garden Rescue (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Flog It! (T) (W) (HD) 5.10 Pointless Celebrities. Fast-paced quiz show. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

6.00 BBC NEWS aT SIx, WEaTHER (W) (HD) 6.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Latest stories. (W) 7.00 THE oNE SHoW Hosted by Matt Baker and Alex Jones. (T) Followed by BBC News, Local News.

8.00 EaT WELL FoR LESS? (3/4) Gregg and Chris visit a household in Leicestershire, where mother Lindsey’s baking obsession, coupled with her fear of the cupboards being empty and her love of brands, mean the family’s spending on food has spiralled out of control. With a food shop that is over three times the national average, the presenters introduce the family to some new recipes to shake their bad habits.

9.00 SaVINg LIVES aT SEa (3/4) In Cornwall, the station’s newest recruit, 18-year-old Shaunna, is following in the family tradition and her grandfather’s footsteps. After a successful first rescue of a teenage holiday maker, she hopes to become Newquay’s first helmswoman. Meanwhile, on the West Coast of Scotland, the remote fishing village of Oban also has a new 18-year-old recruit, Andrew.

However, he and the rest of the crew are given a painful reminder of the dangers all lifeboat volunteers face when they are woken in the middle of the night to rescue a fishing boat that is sinking. (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 BBC NEWS aT TEN Latest headlines. (W) (HD) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional stories. (W) Followed by National Lottery Update. (T) (W) 10.45 a QuESTIoN oF SPoRT Sue Barker asks the questions in the light-hearted quiz, with celebrity guests joining Matt Dawson and Phil Tufnell.

11.15 RooM 101 – ExTRa SToRagE (4/8) Frank Skinner welcomes comedian James Acaster, journalist Kirsty Wark and celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal to discuss their pet hates. Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 BBC News. The latest national news and sport. (W) (HD)

BBC 2

The Hairy Builder, 6.30pm 6.00

Fake Britain (rpt) 6.45 Garden Rescue (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 The Hairy Builder (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 Sign Zone: An Island Parish (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 8.30 Sign Zone: An Island Parish (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 Lifeline (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 12.10 FILM: Pride And Prejudice (1940) Period drama, starring Laurence Olivier. (T) 2.05 Coast (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 2.25 Super Cute Animals (rpt) (T) 3.25 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) 3.45 David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities (rpt) (W) 4.10 Michael Palin’s New Europe (rpt) (HD) 5.10 Antiques Roadshow (rpt)

6.00 EggHEadS (82/100) Jeremy Vine hosts the quiz in which the winners of famous game shows including Mastermind and Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? work as a team to tackle a new set of challengers hoping to win a cash prize. (T) (W) (HD) 6.30 THE HaIRy BuILdER (13/15) Dave Myers helps restore a church in New Brighton, Merseyside. (T) 7.00 gREaT aMERICaN RaILRoad JouRNEyS (3/8) Michael Portillo follows America’s iconic River Hudson, beginning at New York City’s Penn Station, before sampling ale and meeting the State Senator.

8.00 MaSTERMINd (3/30) Specialist and general knowledge quiz, with John Humphrys. (T) (W) (HD) 8.30 gaRdENERS’ WoRLd (18/31) Monty Don tackles his espaliered pear trees. (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 VERSaILLES (8/10) While Louis proposes an audacious alliance with England, along with an unexpected envoy to negotiate it, the normally brazen Beatrice fears her secrets being revealed.

The period drama depicting the early reign of King Louis XIV continues. Followed by Inside Versailles.

10.00 Boy MEETS gIRL (4/6) Pam tries to convince Leo and Judy to hold the wedding reception at a hotel. (T) 10.30 NEWSNIgHT Presented by Emily Maitlis. (T) (W) (HD) Followed by Weather. (T) (W) (HD) 11.15 PEoPLE JuST do NoTHINg (3/5) Grindah and Beats find themselves short of cannabis.

Spoof documentary, starring Allan Mustafa. (T) (W) 11.45 INSIdE THE FaCToRy: HoW ouR FaVouRITE FoodS aRE MadE (1/6) Gregg Wallace and Cherry Healey shed more light on the making of Britain’s favourite foods. (rpt) (T) 12.45 Sign Zone: Exodus: Our Journey To Europe (rpt) 1.45 Sign Zone: Saving Lives At Sea (rpt) 2.45 This Is BBC Two (T)

IT V

Coronation Street, 7.30pm 6.00

Good Morning Britain (W) (HD) 8.30 Lorraine (W) (HD) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.30 This Morning (W) (HD) 12.30 Loose Women (W) (HD) 1.30 ITV News, Weather (W) 1.55 Local News, Weather (W) 2.00 Judge Rinder (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (W) (HD) 3.59 ITV Local Weather (W) 4.00 Tipping Point (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.00 The Chase (rpt) (W)

6.00 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 7.00 EMMERdaLE Chrissie learns that the police are searching the grounds of Home Farm and tries to cover up any evidence of Lachlan’s guilt – but later decides to use the situation to get revenge. (W) (HD) 7.30 CoRoNaTIoN STREET Todd and Billy agree they need to work out how to break the news of their relationship to Sean, with David giving his views on the subject as well. (W) (HD) 8.00 NEW WILd aNIMaL REuNIoNS SERIES Cameras follow animal keepers and caregivers as they embark on an adventure, aiming to reunite with the iconic wild animals they have forged deep bonds with. Narrated by Caroline Quentin.

9.00 LoNg LoST FaMILy (3/7) Fifty-year-old Deborah Ozturk has spent years longing to find her birth mother and thank her for the sacrifice she made when she gave her up as a baby. Meanwhile, 74-year-old Ray Jones from West Sussex realised as an adult that there was a void in his life, after he was separated from his mother and younger brother at the age of two. However, during his search for his family the previous year, he accessed his case file and is now haunted by a missed opportunity. Presented

by Davina McCall and Nicky Campbell. (W) (HD) 10.00 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional news. (W) 10.45 HoLIday HoRRoRS: CaugHT oN CaMERa Jamie Theakston narrates cringeworthy clips of relaxing getaways that turned sour, beginning with a walk in the woods that suddenly became a fight for survival. (rpt) (W) (HD) 11.45 IN PLaIN SIgHT (13/13) On the day of Brandi’s wedding, maid of honour Mary must protect a witness from hired mercenaries. (rpt) (W) (HD) 12.30 Jackpot247 (W) 3.00 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD) 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show.

Warring families tackle each other. (rpt)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

BBC1 WaLES As BBC1 except: 10.45 Battling with Benefits 11.15 A Question of Sport 11.45 Room 101 – Extra Storage 12.25 Weather for the Week Ahead 12.30-6.00 BBC News. Latest news.

BBC1 SCoTLaNd As BBC1 except: 10.45 Holby City 11.45 A Question of Sport 12.15 Room 101 – Extra Storage 12.55 Weather for the Week Ahead 1.00-6.00 BBC News. Latest headlines.

BBC1 NoRTHERN IRELaNd As BBC1 except: 10.45-11.15 Keepin ’er Country. Two weeks in the life of star Nathan Carter.

BBC2 WaLES As BBC2 except: 7.00-8.00 Great American Railroad Journeys. Michael Portillo follows America’s iconic River Hudson, beginning at New York City’s Penn Station.

BBC2 SCoTLaNd As BBC2 except: 7.00-8.00 The Scottish National Trail. Cameron McNeish walks the second half of the 470-mile route from Kirk Yetholm to Cape Wrath.

ITV WEST As ITV except: 6.00-6.30 Local News. Latest headlines.

ITV WaLES As ITV WEST except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather 6.006.30 ITV News Wales at Six. Latest regional news and sport.

S4C 7.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 7.10 Cyw: Yn yr Ardd 7.25 Cyw: Ty Mel 7.35 Cyw: Sbridiri 7.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 8.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 8.15 Cyw: Sbarc 8.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 8.40 Cyw: Boj 8.50 Cyw: Bing 9.00 Cyw: Twt 9.10 Cyw: Do Re Mi Dona 9.25 Cyw: Tomos a’i Ffrindiau 9.35 Cyw: Ty Cyw 9.50 Cyw: Nodi 10.05 Cyw: Y Dywysoges Fach 10.15 Cyw: Wmff 10.25 Cyw: Cwpwrdd

Cadi 10.35 Cyw: Sara a Cwac 10.45 Cyw: Tecwyn y Tractor 11.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 11.10 Cyw: Yn yr Ardd 11.25 Cyw: Ty Mel 11.35 Cyw: Sbridiri 11.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 12.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 12.15 Cyw: Sbarc 12.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 12.40 Cyw: Boj 12.50 Cyw: Bing 1.00 Newyddion 1.05 Heno 1.30 Dechrau Canu Dechrau Canmol 2.00 Prynhawn Da 2.55 Newyddion 3.00 Y Sioe 2016 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: Sinema’r Byd 5.15 Stwnsh: Gogs 5.20 Stwnsh: Lois yn Erbyn Anni 5.30 Stwnsh: Llond Ceg 6.00 Pobol y Cwm 6.25 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 6.30 Bro: Caerffili 7.00 Heno 7.30 Pum Merch, Tri Chopa, Un Cwch 8.00 Pobol y Cwm 8.25 Only Men Aloud 9.00 Newyddion 9.30 Pethe: Twm Morys a’r Fenni 10.00 Taith Bryn Terfel: Gwlad y Gân 11.00-11.35 Bois y Bins

CHANNEL 4

The Three Day nanny, 8pm 6.15

3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 6.40 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.05 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.25 Dare To Believe: Hannah Cockroft (rpt) (HD) 8.30 Frasier (rpt) 9.00 Frasier (rpt) 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) 10.00 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 10.30 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.00 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.30 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 12.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 1.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.35 Glorious Goodwood: Channel 4 Racing. Live coverage of the second day of the Glorious Goodwood festival. (HD) 4.00 The Question Jury 5.00 Couples Come Dine With Me (rpt)

6.00 The SImPSonS (9/21) Bart disobeys Marge’s wishes and attends a rap concert. While returning home, he realises how much trouble he will be in – so he decides to fake his own kidnapping. (rpt) 6.30 hollyoAkS Maxine is taken to the station, while Sienna realises Peri and Nico are missing.

Plus, Mac confides in Neeta about his insecurities.

7.00 ChAnnel 4 newS National headlines. (HD) 8.00 new The Three DAy nAnny SerIeS Kathryn Mewes helps the Scott family get to grips with things in Northamptonshire, where she witnesses extreme behaviour by three-year-old Bobbie and two-year-old Freddie. (HD) 9.00 24 hourS In A&e A 12-year-old girl is airlifted to St George’s after falling from a cliff near her home in Hastings, and CT scans reveal she requires emergency brain surgery. (HD) 10.00 mAn Down (3/6) Brian meets the woman of his dreams. Comedy, starring Greg Davies. (HD) 10.30 8 ouT oF 10 CATS DoeS CounTDown Sean Lock and Rob Beckett compete against Jon Richardson and Cariad Lloyd in the panel show, while Jamie Laing helps out in Dictionary Corner. (rpt) 11.35 eDen The 23 men and women must now learn to live with one another. Anton spends more and more time building his cabin in the woods, which leads to a confrontation with some of the group. (rpt) (HD) 12.35 Dare To Believe: Lauren Steadman (rpt) (HD) 12.40 Naked Attraction (rpt) (HD) 1.35 FILM: The Reader (2008) Drama, starring Kate Winslet. (SL) (W) (HD) 3.35 Dare To Believe: Ali Jawad (rpt) (HD) 3.40 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under (rpt) (HD) 4.35 French Collection (rpt) (HD) 5.30 Countdown. Words-and-numbers panel game. (rpt) (HD)

CHANNEL 5

GPs Behind Closed Doors, 8pm 6.00

Milkshake! The WotWots (rpt) 6.10 Chloe’s Closet (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Lily’s Driftwood Bay (rpt) (HD) 6.30 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 6.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.45 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Little Princess (rpt) 7.10 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Thomas & Friends (rpt) 7.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.05 Wissper (HD) 8.15 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.25 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.35 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Toot The Tiny Tugboat (rpt) (HD) 9.00 Bananas In Pyjamas (rpt) 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD) 11.30 Big Brother: The Final (rpt) (HD) 1.10 5 News Lunchtime (HD) 1.15 Home And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 NCIS (rpt) (HD) 3.15 FILM: Secret Liaison (2013) Thriller, starring Meredith Monroe.

(HD) 5.00 5 News At 5 (HD) 5.30 Neighbours (rpt)

6.00 home AnD AwAy Kat warns Josh not to let Andy take the blame for Charlotte and Jake, Phoebe realises Dom is still in love with his wife and Tori’s brothers adjust to their new surroundings. (rpt) 6.30 5 newS TonIGhT Latest news and sport. (HD) 7.00 SeCreTS oF GreAT BrITISh CASTleS (5/6) Dan Jones explores the history of Stirling Castle, which has long been one of the most important castles in Britain and guards the gateway to the Highlands. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 5 News Update.

8.00 GPS: BehInD CloSeD DoorS (41/50) Doctor William Laird gives a rugby player advice on his blackened toenail, while Nurse Sarah Maloney gives a medical student a crash course in skin tag removal. (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 9.00 ulTImATe CeleBrITy Power CouPleS 2016 Celebrating the world’s biggest celebrity couples of 2016, with a definitive countdown based on the stars’ reported wealth and media impact.

Featuring interviews and insiders, the programme explores what makes a successful celebrity partnership, before revealing which duo will be crowned Ultimate Celebrity Power Couple 2016.

Includes The Health Lottery draw at 9.55pm.

11.00 on BeneFITS: lIFe on The Dole (19/24) The documentary meets claimants in Yorkshire, including a 45-year-old trying to make it as a DJ. (rpt) 12.00 Nightmare Neighbour Next Door: Living In Fear (rpt) (HD) 1.00 SuperCasino 3.10 Secrets Of Underground Britain (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Now That’s Funny! (rpt) (SL) (HD) 4.45 Great Scientists (rpt) (SL) 5.10 House Doctor (rpt) (SL) 5.35 House Doctor. Property advice show. (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

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8.00am That ’70s Show 8.45 Film: James and the Giant Peach (U) Fantasy. 10.20 That ’70s Show 11.20 My Wife and Kids 12.20pm Dance Moms 1.20 Big Brother: Live Final 3.00 Neighbours 3.30 Home and Away 4.00 8 Simple Rules 5.00 Cats Make You Laugh Out Loud 5.55 Access 6.00 Neighbours 6.30 Home and Away 7.00 Dance Moms 8.00 100 Per Cent Hotter 9.00 Film: Safe (15) Thriller, with Jason Statham. 10.55 Celebrity Big Brother: The Best, The Worst and the Unforgettable. 12.50am Teen Wolf

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Diagnosis Murder 10.00 Access 10.10 Film: Abducted: The Carlina White Story (2012) (12) Fact-based drama, starring Keke Palmer. 12.00noon CSI: NY 1.00 NCIS 2.00 Person of Interest 4.00 NCIS 5.00 CSI: NY 6.00 CSI: Miami 7.00 NCIS 9.00 Chicago Fire 10.00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. Warrick is accused of murder.

12.00midnight CSI: Miami 1.00 CSI: Miami 2.00 CSI: NY 3.00 Ironside 3.45 Access 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping

Wednesday 27 July 2016

ITV2 6.20am Dinner Date 7.10 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 8.00 Emmerdale 9.00 You’ve Been Framed!

Gold 9.30 Psych 10.20 Royal Pains 11.15 Dinner Date 12.15pm Emmerdale 1.15 You’ve Been Framed! 1.45 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 7.00 You’ve Been Framed! 8.00 Two and a Half Men 9.00 Hell’s Kitchen 10.00 The Vampire Diaries 10.55 Family Guy 11.55 American Dad! ITV3 6.35am Heartbeat 7.35 Where the Heart Is 8.35 The Royal 9.40 Judge Judy 11.00 Murder, She Wrote 12.00noon Love Your Garden 1.00 Heartbeat 2.05 The Royal 3.05 Where the Heart Is 4.15 Doctor in the House 4.50 On the Buses 5.20 Man About the House 5.55 Heartbeat 7.00 Murder, She Wrote 8.00 Agatha Christie’s Marple 10.00 Law & Order: UK 11.00 Wire in the Blood 12.35am Inspector Morse 2.30 Teleshopping ITV4 6.00am Gunsmoke 6.50 Minder 7.45 Ironside 8.50 Quincy ME 9.50 Ax Men 10.50 The Chase 11.50 Gunsmoke 12.55pm Pawn Stars 1.45 The Saint 2.50 Minder 3.55 Quincy ME 4.55 Ironside 6.00 The Saint 7.00 Pawn Stars 8.00 British Superbike Championship Highlights 9.00 The Motorbike Show 10.00 Film: Firefox (1982,15) 12.45am Film: The Big Lebowski (1998,18) BBC Four 7.00pm World News Today 7.30 The Wonder of Animals 8.00 Yellowstone 9.00 Masters of the Pacific Coast: The Tribes of The American Northwest 10.00 Ocean Giants 11.00 Burma, My Father and the Forgotten Army 12.00midnight The Real White Queen and Her Rivals 1.00 Timeshift: The Nation’s Railway: The Golden Age of British Rail 2.00 The Toilet – An Unspoken History 3.00 Masters of the Pacific Coast: The Tribes of The American Northwest 4.00 Close Sky 1 7.00am The Flash 9.00 Futurama 10.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 12.00noon Hawaii Five-0 1.00 Supergirl 2.00 The Flash 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.00 Don’t Tell the Bride 9.00 Karl Pilkington: The Moaning of Life 10.00 Ross Kemp: Extreme World 11.00 A League of Their Own 12.00midnight NCIS: Los Angeles Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am Fish Town 7.00 The Guest Wing 8.00 Cold Case 10.00 The West Wing 11.00 House 12.00noon Without a Trace 1.00 Blue Bloods 2.00 Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets 3.00 Cold Case 5.00 The West Wing 6.00 House 7.00 Without a Trace 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 Game of Thrones 11.35 Dexter Sky CInemA PremIere 7.45am McFarland, USA (PG) 10.00 Star Trek Beyond: Special 10.30 Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (15) 12.15pm Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (PG) 2.00 Ant-Man (12) 4.00 McFarland, USA (PG) 6.15 Wolves (18) 8.00 Ant-Man (2015,12) 10.00 Four Corners (15) 12.15am Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (15) FIlm4 11.00am Diary of a Wimpy Kid (PG) 12.50pm Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules (U) 2.55 Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea (U) 4.55 Bridge to Terabithia (PG) 6.50 Footloose (1984,15) 9.00 Knight and Day (2010,12) 11.10 Filth (2013,18) 1.05am Sex and the City (2008,15) CBS ACTIon 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 JAG 10.00 MacGyver 11.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 12.00noon Star Trek 1.00 Bonanza 2.00 NCIS 4.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 5.00 JAG 6.00 Star Trek 7.00 MacGyver 8.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Bad Girls 10.50 Walker, Texas Ranger 11.50 NCIS CBS reAlITy 9.00am Judge Judy 10.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 11.00 Unsolved Mysteries 12.00noon Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction? 1.00 Judge Judy 3.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 4.00 Unsolved Mysteries 5.00 Judge Judy 7.00 Medical Detectives 8.00 Troubled Teens: Jail Shock 9.00 Cold Blood 10.00 24 Hours to Kill 11.00 Medical Detectives 12.00midnight I Survived 1.00 Cold Blood Sky SPorTS 1 8.00am ATP Masters Tennis 9.00 Spanish Football Gold 9.30 Sporting Triumphs 10.00 Sporting Heroes 11.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold 11.30 Darts Gold 12.00noon Sporting Triumphs 1.00 ATP Masters Tennis 2.30 Football’s Greatest Teams 3.00 International Champions Cup Football 5.00 Football’s Greatest Teams 5.30 International Champions Cup Football 12.30am International Champions Cup Football

BBC 1

Hugh’s War on Waste: The Battle Continues, 9pm 6.00

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 9.15 Countryside 999 (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 Neighbourhood Blues (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 Bargain Hunt (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 BBC News At One, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 1.30 Local News, (T) Weather (W) 1.45 Red Rock (T) (W) 2.25 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) 3.25 Garden Rescue (T) (W) 4.10 Flog It! (rpt) (T) (W) 5.10 Pointless Celebrities (rpt) (T) (W)

6.00 BBC NEWS aT SIx, WEaTHER (W) (HD) 6.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 7.00 THE oNE SHoW Matt Baker and Alex Jones present the live magazine show. (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 EaSTENdERS Tension grows at the Mitchells and Mick and Lee have a heart to heart about the latter’s parenthood concerns. (T) (W) (HD) Followed by BBC News, Local News. (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 CELEBRITy MaSTERCHEF (11/12) The hopefuls have been whittled down to four finalists, who now face their toughest challenges to date as they vie for this year’s title. The last two days of competition begin as they replicate John Torode’s Korean fried chicken with Asian salad, identifying the ingredients by taste only. They then have to rustle up two courses of their own design for four of the country’s most feared restaurant critics – and the stakes are high as one of them will be hanging up their apron.

9.00 HugH’S WaR oN WaSTE: THE BaTTLE CoNTINuES Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall continues his mission to reduce waste, finding out how many cardboard coffee cups are being recycled.

10.00 BBC NEWS aT TEN Latest headlines. (T) (W) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.45 MaTRoN, MEdICINE aNd ME: 70 yEaRS oF THE NHS (1/5) Lucy Alexander is the first of five famous faces examining the history of the NHS, with the TV presenter being reunited with staff who helped save her daughter’s life. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.30 FaSTER, HIgHER, STRoNgER: kaTaRINa’S oLyMpIC dREaM Former Team GB Olympic athlete Darren Campbell presents a profile of Katarina Johnson-Thompson, the Merseyside heptathlete hoping to succeed Jessica Ennis-Hill as Britain’s Olympic champion in Rio this year. (rpt) Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) 12.05 BBC News. Latest national and international news. (T) (W)

BBC 2

The Refugee Camp: our desert Home, 9pm 6.00

Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 6.45 Garden Rescue (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 The Hairy Builder (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 Sign Zone: The Great British Sewing Bee (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 Nature’s Miracle Orphans (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 Golf: Women’s British Open. Day one of the Major. (T) (W) (HD) 5.15 Antiques Roadshow (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

6.00 EggHEadS (83/100) Jeremy Vine hosts the quiz in which the winners of famous game shows, including Mastermind and Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? work as a team to tackle a new set of challengers hoping to win a cash prize. (T) (W) (HD) 6.30 THE HaIRy BuILdER (14/15) Dave Myers travels to Ampleforth monastery and college in North Yorkshire, where he hangs out with the monks and helps restore the art deco Bolton House. (T) (W) 7.00 gREaT aMERICaN RaILRoad JouRNEyS (4/8) Michael Portillo travels across New York state, discovering how General Electric also leads the way in rail technology. He then visits Buffalo and ends with a trip to Niagara Falls. (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 FuLL STEaM aHEad (2/6) Historians Peter Ginn and Alex Langlands work as navvies, who built the railway tracks in all weather conditions and Ruth Goodman finds out what impact the railroads had on the cottage industries. (T) (W) (HD) 9.00 THE REFugEE CaMp: ouR dESERT HoME (2/2) The second part of the documentary is about Zaatari, a refugee camp in Jordan and focuses on what the future holds for the 80,000 Syrians who have made this desert city their home. (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 QI (7/18) With Jimmy Carr, Aisling Bea and Danny Bhoy. Stephen Fry asks the questions. (rpt) (T) (W) 10.30 NEWSNIgHT Analysis of the day’s events. (T) (W) (HD) Followed by Weather. (T) (W) (HD) 11.15 THE SoMME 1916 – FRoM BoTH SIdES oF THE WIRE (2/3) Historian Peter Barton concentrates on the second phase of the battle, from the middle of July to mid-September, revealing that the slowness of the Allied advance led to the emergence of a new German tactic. (rpt) (T) (W) 12.15 Sign Zone: Britain’s Missing Young People – Panorama (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 12.45 Sign Zone: Exodus: Our Journey To Europe (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 1.45 Sign Zone: Shop Well For Less? (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 2.45 This Is BBC Two (W) (HD)

IT V

Real Stories With Ranvir Singh, 7.30pm 6.00

Good Morning Britain (W) (HD) 8.30 Lorraine (W) (HD) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.30 This Morning (W) (HD) 12.30 Loose Women (W) (HD) 1.30 ITV News, Weather (W) 1.55 Local News, Weather (W) 2.00 Judge Rinder (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (W) (HD) 3.59 ITV Local Weather (W) 4.00 Tipping Point (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.00 The Chase (rpt) (W)

6.00 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 7.00 EMMERdaLE Andy fails to convince the police of his innocence. Gabby tells Liv that she has permission to borrow Victoria’s new dress, but intends to break in to Keeper’s Cottage and steal it. (W) (HD) 7.30 REaL SToRIES WITH RaNVIR SINgH (3/6) The parents of judo champion Stephanie Inglis talk about her near-fatal motorcycle accident in May. A criminal-turned-businesswoman reveals how she is helping other ex-cons by training them as bakers.

8.00 EMMERdaLE Lawrence regains consciousness, giving Andy hope that the truth will come out.

However, Chrissie pressures her father into keeping quiet about what Lachlan did to him. (W) (HD) 8.30 BRExIT – WHaT’S youR HouSE WoRTH? ToNIgHT Jonathan Maitland investigates the housing market in post-Brexit Britain, asking whether it provides a chance for millions to own their own home – or if a price crash is on the way. (W) 9.00 THE INVESTIgaToR: a BRITISH CRIME SToRy (3/4) Mark Williams-Thomas continues his investigation into the disappearance of Carole Packman, looking deeper into the relationship of her husband Russell and his mistress Patricia. (W) (HD) 10.00 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 10.40 dRIVE (2/5) Vernon Kay puts eight celebrity racing rookies, including Professor Green, Johnny Vegas and Angus Deayton, through their paces. Jason Plato offers expert advice and introduces the group to their second challenge, off-road buggy racing. (rpt) 11.40 MuRdER, SHE WRoTE (8/21) Jessica puts her investigative skills to the test once more, this time delving into two suspicious deaths at a vineyard.

Starring Angela Lansbury as the slueth. (rpt) (HD) 12.35 Jackpot247 (W) 3.00 Brexit – What’s Your House Worth?

Tonight (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.25 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD) 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show. Talk show. (rpt) (SL) (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

BBC1 NoRTHERN IRELaNd As BBC1 except: 10.45 True North: Wonder Women. Documentary. 11.15 Matron, Medicine and Me: 70 Years of the NHS 12.00 Faster, Higher, Stronger: Katarina’s Olympic Dream 12.30-6.00 BBC News. Latest headlines.

BBC2 SCoTLaNd As BBC2 except: 7.00 Flog It! 7.30-8.00 The Beechgrove Garden. Chris Beardshaw works on an exotic border.

ITV yoRkSHIRE As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.00-6.30 Local News. Latest headlines and sport.

ITV WaLES As ITV WEST except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.00-6.30 ITV News Wales at Six. Regional bulletin.

10.40 Eisteddfod 2016 11.10-11.40 Wild France with Ray Mears

ITV TyNE TEES As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.00-6.30 Local News. Latest headlines and sport.

ITV gRaNada As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather. Latest forecast. 6.00-6.30 Local News. Latest headlines including sport.

S4C 7.00 Cyw: Cled 7.10 Cyw: Yn yr Ardd 7.25 Cyw: Octonots 7.35 Cyw: Ben Dant 7.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 8.00 Cyw: Popi’r Gath 8.10 Cyw: Meic y Marchog 8.25 Cyw: Cymylaubychain 8.35 Cyw: Sam Tân 8.45 Cyw: Peppa 8.55 Cyw: Pingu 9.00 Cyw: Cwpwrdd Cadi 9.15 Cyw: Stiw 9.25 Cyw: Tomos a’i Ffrindiau 9.35 Cyw: Tili a’i Ffrindiau 9.50 Cyw: Abadas 10.00 Cyw: Y Dywysoges Fach 10.10 Cyw: Mwnci’n Dweud Mwnci’n Gwneud 10.20 Cyw: ABC 10.35 Cyw: Igam Ogam 10.45 Cyw: Cei Bach 11.00 Cyw: Cled

11.10 Cyw: Yn yr Ardd 11.25 Cyw: Octonots 11.35 Cyw: Ben Dant 11.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 12.00 Cyw: Popi’r Gath 12.10 Cyw: Meic y Marchog 12.25 Cyw: Cymylaubychain 12.35 Cyw: Sam Tân 12.45 Cyw: Peppa 12.55 Cyw: Pingu 1.00 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd.

News and weather. 1.05 Heno 1.30 Cefn Gwlad 2.00 Prynhawn Da 2.55 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 3.00 Taith Bryn Terfel: Gwlad y Gân 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: Dim Byd 5.10 Stwnsh: Dennis a Dannedd 5.20 Stwnsh: Jac Russell 5.40 Stwnsh: Drewgi 5.55 Stwnsh: Bernard 6.00 Pobol y Cwm 6.25 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 6.30 Dudley ar Daith 7.00 Heno 7.30 Y Ty Cymreig 8.00 Pobol y Cwm 8.25 Pobol y Cwm 9.00 Newyddion 9 a’r Tywydd 9.30 Difas Yr Eisteddfod 10.30-11.35 Cymry Rhyfel Cartref Sbaen

CHANNEL 4

999: What’s your emergency? 9pm 6.15

3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 6.40 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.05 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.30 Dare To Believe: Jordanne Whiley (rpt) 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.30 Frasier (rpt) 9.00 Frasier (rpt) 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) 10.00 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) 10.30 The Simpsons (rpt) 10.55 Dare To Believe: Natasha Baker (rpt) 11.00 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.30 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 12.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 1.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) 1.35 Glorious Goodwood: Channel 4 Racing. Live coverage of the third day of the Glorious Goodwood festival. 4.00 The Question Jury 5.00 Couples Come Dine With Me (rpt)

6.00 The SImPSonS (10/21) A hillbilly’s tirade about Springfield prompts Mayor Quimby to legalise same-sex marriage in the town. (rpt) 6.30 hollyoAkS Cameron, Leela and Sienna team up to find Peri and Nico and a stressed Alfie offers to help look for the pair as a distraction from worrying about the imminent arrival of his PET scan results.

7.00 ChAnnel 4 neWS Latest headlines. (HD) 8.00 InSIDe ouT homeS Zac Monro updates an ex-council house in south London by demolishing it and starting again. He also adds a garden office and new kitchen to a Newcastle home. Last in the series.

9.00 999: WhAT’S your emergenCy? The care and support of people with mental health issues, including a man who believes he is possessed by the devil and PC Karl Dickin answers a 4am callout to a young woman in desperate need of help. (HD) 10.00 rAmSAy’S hoTel hell Gordon Ramsay checks into the luxurious Lakeview Hotel on Lake Chelan, Washington, where the hotel’s business is failing.

11.00 DAre To BelIeVe: JACk ruTTer (5/7) A profile of the captain of Great Britain’s disability football team, who will lead his team at Rio 2016. (rpt) 11.05 24 hourS In A&e Twelve-year-old Tulsi is airlifted to St George’s after falling from a cliff. (rpt) 12.05 The Job Interview (rpt) (HD) 1.05 Dare To Believe: Georgie Hermitage. A profile of the parasport athlete. (rpt) (HD) 1.10 Saddam Goes To Hollywood (rpt) (HD) 2.05 Child Genius (rpt) (HD) 3.05 How School Bosses Spend Your Millions: Channel 4 Dispatches (rpt) (SL) (HD) 3.35 Food Unwrapped (rpt) (SL) (HD) 4.05 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under (rpt) (HD) 5.00 Dare To Believe: Natasha Baker (rpt) (HD) 5.05 Countdown (rpt) (HD) 5.45 Draw It! (rpt)

CHANNEL 5

on Benefits: life on The Dole, 8pm 6.00

Milkshake! The WotWots (rpt) 6.10 Chloe’s Closet (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Lily’s Driftwood Bay (rpt) (HD) 6.30 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 6.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.45 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Little Princess (rpt) 7.10 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Thomas & Friends (rpt) 7.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.05 Wissper (HD) 8.15 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.25 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.35 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Toot The Tiny Tugboat (rpt) (HD) 9.00 Bananas In Pyjamas (rpt) 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD) 11.15 To B&B The Best (HD) 12.10 5 News Lunchtime (HD) 12.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (rpt) (HD) 1.15 Home And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 NCIS (rpt) (HD) 3.10 Rosamunde Pilcher: The Unknown Heart. First of a two-part romantic drama. (rpt) (HD) 5.00 5 News At 5 5.30 Neighbours (rpt)

6.00 home AnD AWAy Phoebe and Justin agree to pretend their drunken encounter never happened, Matt comes home to find Roo passed out and John is devastated when he learns about Skye. (rpt) (HD) 6.30 5 neWS TonIghT Latest headlines. (HD) 7.00 SeCreTS oF unDergrounD BrITAIn (2/6) Rob Bell goes on a subterranean adventure under the streets of London, discovering a labyrinth of tunnels, vaults and secret places the general public is not meant to know about. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. Latest headlines and sport. (HD) 8.00 on BeneFITS: lIFe on The Dole (20/24) People coping with medical and financial difficulties, including a family of four from Whitby whose problems include a father with Tourette’s and an autistic child. (HD) Followed by 5 News Update.

9.00 neW CeleBrITy BIg BroTher: lIVe SerIeS lAunCh Emma Willis invites a fresh group of famous faces to move in together, ready to have their every word and move recorded for the enjoyment of the viewing public. (HD) Includes The Health Lottery draw at 9.55pm.

11.05 neW CeleBrITy BIg BroTher’S BIT on SerIeS The SIDe Rylan Clark-Neal presents the live spin-off show, inviting the audience and guests to comment on the new housemates and how they will cope with CBB life, who will get on with who and which housemates are likely to ruffle a few feathers.

12.05 SuperCasino 3.10 Benefit Beauty Queens (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Now That’s Funny! (rpt) (SL) 4.45 Great Scientists (rpt) (SL) 5.10 House Doctor (rpt) (SL) 5.35 House Doctor (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

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8.00am Access 8.10 That ’70s Show 8.55 Access 9.05 Film: Big Momma’s House (2000) (12) 11.00 That ’70s Show 12.00noon My Wife and Kids 12.55 Access 1.00 Dance Moms 3.00 Neighbours 3.30 Home and Away 4.00 8 Simple Rules 5.00 Dance Moms 6.00 Neighbours 6.30 Home and Away 7.00 Dance Moms 8.00 Sing It On! 9.00 The Magicians 10.00 American Horror Story: Asylum 11.00 Autopsy: Bobbi Kristina Brown 12.00midnight Celebrity Big Brother: Live from the House

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Diagnosis Murder 10.00 Access 10.10 Film: Damaged (2014) Thriller, starring Chris Klein.

12.00noon CSI: NY 1.00 NCIS 2.00 Person of Interest 3.00 Person of Interest 4.00 NCIS 5.00 CSI: NY 6.00 CSI: Miami 7.00 NCIS 8.00 NCIS 9.00 Chicago PD 10.00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. A man goes on a killing spree. 11.00 Law & Order. A TV reporter is murdered.

12.00midnight CSI: NY 1.00 CSI: Miami 2.00 CSI: NY 3.00 The Mentalist 3.45 Access 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping

Thursday 28 July 2016

ITV2 7.10am The Ellen DeGeneres Show 8.00 Emmerdale 8.30 Coronation Street 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! 9.30 Psych 10.20 Royal Pains 11.15 Dinner Date 12.15pm Emmerdale 12.45 Coronation Street 1.15 You’ve Been Framed! 1.45 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 7.20 The Hot Desk: Ed Sheeran 7.30 You’ve Been Framed! 8.00 Two and a Half Men 9.00 Film: The Bourne Identity (12) 11.20 Family Guy 12.20am American Dad! ITV3 7.30am Where the Heart Is 8.30 The Royal 9.30 Judge Judy 10.55 Murder, She Wrote 11.55 Love Your Garden 1.00pm Heartbeat 2.00 The Royal 3.05 Where the Heart Is 4.15 Doctor in the House 4.50 On the Buses 5.20 Man About the House 5.55 Heartbeat 7.00 Murder, She Wrote 8.00 Endeavour 10.00 Law & Order: UK 11.00 Wycliffe 12.05am Inspector Morse ITV4 6.50am Minder 7.50 Ironside 8.50 Quincy ME 9.50 Ax Men 10.45 The Chase 11.45 Gunsmoke 12.50pm Pawn Stars 1.45 The Saint 2.50 Minder 3.55 Quincy ME 4.55 Ironside 6.00 The Saint 7.00 Pawn Stars 8.00 The Motorbike Show 9.00 Film: Octopussy (PG) 11.40 Film: Renegades (18) 11.55 Monster Carp BBC Four 7.00pm World News Today, Weather 7.30 Top of the Pops: 1982 8.00 Masters of the Pacific Coast: The Tribes of The American Northwest 9.00 Roger Bannister: Everest on the Track 10.00 One Night In 2012: An Imagine Special 11.40 Sinatra: All or Nothing at All Sky 1 6.00am Supergirl 7.00 The Flash 9.00 Futurama 10.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 12.00noon Hawaii Five-0 1.00 Supergirl 2.00 The Flash 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.00 Duck Quacks Don’t Echo 9.00 Don’t Tell the Bride 10.00 Modern Family 11.00 A League of Their Own 12.00midnight NCIS: Los Angeles 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 2.00 Forever Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am Fish Town 7.00 The Guest Wing 8.00 Cold Case 10.00 The West Wing 11.00 House 12.00noon Without a Trace 1.00 Blue Bloods 2.00 Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets 3.00 Cold Case 5.00 The West Wing 6.00 House 7.00 Without a Trace 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 Band of Brothers 11.35 Last Week Tonight with John Oliver 12.10am Vice Principals Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Wolves (18) 7.35 Alex Zane’s Cinecast 7.55 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (PG) 9.40 Swelter (15) 11.30 Ant-Man (12) 1.30pm McFarland, USA (PG) 3.45 Star Trek Beyond: Special 4.15 Wolves (18) 6.00 Ant-Man (12) 8.00 McFarland, USA (PG) 10.15 Swelter (15) 12.00midnight Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (2015,15) FIlm4 11.00am Dunston Checks In (PG) 12.45pm Sunshine on Leith (PG) 2.45 Picture Perfect (PG) 4.45 The Death and Life of Charlie St Cloud (12) 6.45 The Three Musketeers (12) 9.00 Unknown (2011,12) 11.15 Hellboy (2004,12) 1.35am American Movie (1999,15) CBS ACTIon 9.00am JAG 10.00 MacGyver 11.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 12.00noon Star Trek 1.00 Bonanza 2.00 NCIS 4.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 5.00 JAG 6.00 Star Trek 7.00 MacGyver 8.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Bad Girls 10.50 Walker, Texas Ranger 11.50 NCIS 2.35am The Streets of San Francisco 3.35 Walker, Texas Ranger 4.20 Flashpoint CBS reAlITy 9.00am Judge Judy 10.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 11.00 Unsolved Mysteries 12.00noon Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction? 1.00 Judge Judy 3.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 4.00 Unsolved Mysteries 5.00 Judge Judy 7.00 Medical Detectives 8.00 Troubled Teens: Jail Shock 9.00 The British Woman on Death Row 10.00 24 Hours to Kill 11.00 Medical Detectives 12.00midnight I Survived Sky SPorTS 1 8.00am ATP Masters Tennis 9.00 Spanish Football Gold 9.30 Football Gold 10.00 Sporting Heroes: Steve Harmison Interviews Kevin Keegan: Part One 11.00 Sky Sports Boxing Gold 11.15 International Champions Cup Football 11.30 Football Gold 11.45 International Champions Cup Football 12.15pm Live International Champions Cup Football 2.45 Football Gold 3.00 Premier League Years 5.00 Sporting Triumphs 5.30 International Champions Cup Football 6.30 Sporting Triumphs 7.00 Live USPGA Championship Golf 1.00am International Champions Cup Football

BBC 1

EastEnders, 8pm 6.00

6.00 6.30 7.00 7.30

8.00

8.30

10.00 10.25 10.35

11.35

1.25

Breakfast (HD) 9.15 Countryside 999 (rpt) (T) (HD) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (rpt) (T) (HD) 11.00 Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 11.45 Neighbourhood Blues (T) (W) (HD) 12.15 Bargain Hunt (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 BBC News At One, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 1.30 BBC Local News, (T) Weather (W) 1.45 Red Rock (T) (W) (HD) 2.25 Escape To The Country (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 3.25 Garden Rescue (T) (W) (HD) 4.10 Flog It! (rpt) (T) (HD) 5.10 Pointless Celebrities (rpt) (T) (HD)

BBC NEWS aT SIx, WEaTHER (W) (HD) LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) THE oNE SHoW Hosted by Alex Jones. (T) (HD) a QuESTIoN oF SPoRT Sue Barker asks the questions in the light-hearted quiz, with celebrity guests joining Matt Dawson and Phil Tufnell. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) Followed by BBC News. (W) (HD) EaSTENdERS Whitney panics when the doctor tells her she has chlamydia. A crisis at home leaves Louise fearing the worst, and Denise tells Kush they can no longer see each other. (T) (W) (HD) CELEBRITy MaSTERCHEF (12/12) The remaining three competitors’ penultimate challenge is the toughest and most daunting of the competition – the Chef’s Table, hosted by Michelin star chef Atul Kochhar at Benares, where they must master new techniques and unfamiliar ingredients to impress some of the best chefs in the UK. Judging the food are Cyrus Todiwala, Alyn Williams, Sabrina Ghayour, Romy Gill and Ed Baines. Back at headquarters, the finalists are tasked to present a faultless three-course meal for John Torode and Gregg Wallace – their last chance to prove that they have what it takes to be crowned champion. Last in the series. (T) (W) (HD) BBC NEWS aT TEN, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) Followed by National Lottery Update. (T) (W) NEW TRICKS Sandra reopens an investigation into the apparent suicide of a Foreign Office diplomat, whose body was found in a frozen lake after a government laptop was stolen from her home. (rpt) SENTINEL (2006) A secret service FILM THE agent is framed for murder as he tries to expose a neo-Nazi militant. Spy thriller, with Michael Douglas and Kiefer Sutherland. (T) (HD) Followed

by Weather For The Week Ahead. (T) (W) (HD) BBC News. Catch up with all the latest headlines. (W) (HD)

BBC 2

Live Challenge Cup Rugby League, 7.30pm 6.00

Fake Britain (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 6.45 Garden Rescue (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 The Hairy Builder (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.00 Sign Zone: Eat Well For Less? (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 9.00 Victoria Derbyshire (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live (T) (W) (HD) 12.00 Nature’s Miracle Orphans (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 Golf: Women’s British Open. Day two of the Major. (T) (W) (HD) 5.15 Antiques Roadshow (rpt) (T) (W) (HD)

6.00 EggHEadS (85/100) Jeremy Vine hosts the quiz show in which the winners of famous gameshows work as a team to tackle a new set of challengers hoping to win a cash prize. (T) (W) (HD) 6.30 EggHEadS Quiz show. (T) (W) (HD) 7.00 THE HaIRy BuILdER (15/15) Dave Myers visits Friars Mill in Leicestershire, to witness the 18thCentury derelict wool mill being brought back to life by being transformed into offices. (T) (W) (HD) 7.30 LIVE CHaLLENgE CuP RugBy LEaguE Wigan Warriors v Hull FC (Kick-off 8.00pm). Mark Chapman presents coverage of the opening semi-final from the Keepmoat Stadium in Doncaster.

Both teams have enjoyed excellent Super League campaigns so far and claimed an away win apiece in the meetings between them, meaning this is expected to be a closely fought and high-quality encounter. With commentary by Dave Woods. (HD) 10.00 CLaRE BaLdINg MEETS LouIS SMITH (3/5) Clare Balding sits down with British Olympic gymnast Louis Smith at the Huntingdon Gymnastics Club to discuss his career to date and his preparations ahead of the Rio Olympics. (T) (HD) 10.30 NEWSNIgHT, WEaTHER (T) (W) (HD) 11.00 aRTSNIgHT – LyNN BaRBER MEETS JoHN LydoN Lynn Barber meets up with punk icon John Lydon, who discusses his life, legacy and songs, reflecting on how 40 years of life on the road has changed him. (HD) Followed by Weather. (T) (HD) 11.35 KEITH RICHaRdS: THE oRIgIN oF THE SPECIES In a documentary directed by acclaimed film-maker Julien Temple, the Rolling Stones guitarist looks back at his formative years in the aftermath of the Second World War. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 12.35 FILM: Tomboy (2011) Drama, starring Zoe Heran. (W) (HD) 1.50 Sign Zone: Forces Of Nature With Brian Cox (rpt) (SL) (T) (W) 2.50 Sign Zone: Trust Me, I’m A Doctor – Summer Special (rpt) 3.50 This Is BBC Two (T) (W) (HD)

IT V

The Nutty Professor,10.40pm 6.00

Good Morning Britain (W) (HD) 8.30 Lorraine (HD) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.30 This Morning (W) (HD) 12.30 Loose Women (W) (HD) 1.30 ITV News, Weather (W) 1.55 Local News, Weather (W) 2.00 Judge Rinder (rpt) (W) (HD) 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (W) (HD) 3.59 ITV Local Weather (W) 4.00 Tipping Point (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.00 The Chase (rpt) (HD)

6.00 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 7.00 EMMERdaLE Ashley and Laurel realise that Gabby was the thief who broke into Keeper’s Cottage.

However, Moira thinks Simon is responsible and despite Holly’s warnings, tells him to stay away. (HD) 7.30 CoRoNaTIoN STREET Eileen’s fears about Billy and Todd’s relationship are confirmed when she eavesdrops on the cab radio, while Sarah worries about David after he snaps at her. (W) (HD) 8.00 gINo’S ITaLIaN ESCaPE – ISLaNdS IN THE SuN (4/6) Gino D’Acampo arrives in Palermo, the capital city of Sicily, where he has an unexpected encounter at the street food market and meets a man who stood up to the Mafia. (rpt) (W) (HD) 8.30 CoRoNaTIoN STREET Eileen insists that Todd should tell Sean the truth about his relationship with Billy, while Gail and Sarah pressure David to let Gemma attend Kylie’s funeral. (W) (HD) 9.00 doC MaRTIN (4/8) Louisa and Martin have their first therapy session together – though neither of them was expecting they would be given homework – while Morwenna is not happy about it when a teenager on work experience starts trying to boss her around in the surgery. Mrs Tishell is surprised when her husband Clive returns and tells her he wants to give things another go, and Louisa has to call Martin when one of her pupils collapses during a school excursion. Comedy drama, starring Martin Clunes and Caroline Catz. (rpt) (W) (HD) 10.00 ITV NEWS, WEaTHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.30 LoCaL NEWS, WEaTHER Regional bulletin. (W) NuTTy PRoFESSoR (1996) 10.40 FILM THE A shy, overweight professor invents a potion that transforms him into a slim, loud-mouthed charmer. Comedy remake, starring Eddie Murphy, Jada Pinkett Smith and James Coburn. (W) (HD) 12.25 Jackpot247. Live interactive gaming. (W) 3.00 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) (SL) (HD) 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (ad) audio description (SL) Sign Language (Hd) High definition

REgIoNaL VaRIaTIoNS

BBC1 WaLES As BBC1 except: 7.30-8.00 Weatherman Walking BBC2 SCoTLaNd As BBC2 except: 11.30 T in the Park 2016 ITV MERIdIaN, ITV CENTRaL, ITV WESTCouNTRy, ITV aNgLIa, ITV yoRKSHIRE, ITVN TyNE TEES, ITV gRaNada As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather 6.00-6.30 Local News: Regional news headlines. Followed by weather.

ITV BoRdER As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather 6.00-6.30 Local News: Regional news headlines. Followed by weather.

ITV WEST As ITV except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather 6.00-6.30 Local News: Regional news headlines. Followed by weather.

ITV WaLES As ITV WEST except: 3.59-4.00 Local Weather

.00-6.30 ITV News Wales at Six: Regional headlines. 8.00-8.30 Coast & Country. Ruth Wignall explores the Gower coastline by boat and Andrew Price goes fossil hunting at Lavernock Point S4C 7.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 7.10 Cyw: Hafod Haul 7.25 Cyw: Ty Mel 7.35 Cyw: Siliwen 7.40 Cyw: Enwog O Fri, Ardal Ni! 7.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 8.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 8.15 Cyw: Bla Bla Blewog 8.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 8.40 Cyw: Boj 8.50 Cyw: Bing 9.00 Cyw: Twt 9.10 Cyw: Llan-ar-goll-en 9.25 Cyw: Tomos a’i Ffrindiau 9.35 Cyw: Marcaroni 9.50 Cyw: Nodi 10.05 Cyw: Y Dywysoges Fach 10.15 Cyw: Y Brodyr Coala 10.25 Cyw: Cwpwrdd Cadi 10.35 Cyw: Sara a Cwac 10.45 Cyw: Bach a Mawr 11.00 Cyw: Holi Hana 11.10 Cyw: Hafod Haul 11.25 Cyw: Ty Mel 11.35 Cyw: Siliwen

11.40 Cyw: Enwog O Fri, Ardal Ni! 11.55 Cyw: Ti Fi a Cyw 12.00 Cyw: Guto Gwningen 12.15 Cyw: Bla Bla Blewog 12.30 Cyw: Syrcas Deithiol Dewi 12.40 Cyw: Boj 12.50 Cyw: Bing 1.00 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 1.05 Heno 1.30 Ffermio 2.00 Prynhawn Da 2.55 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 3.00 Garddio a Mwy 3.30 Y Ty Cymreig 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: P’Nawn da Bawb 5.15 Stwnsh: Dan Glo 5.40 Stwnsh: Oi! Osgar 5.45 Stwnsh: Gwboi a Twm Twm 6.00 Pobol y Cwm 6.25 Newyddion S4C a’r Tywydd 6.30 Pobol y Cwm 7.00 Heno 8.00 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol 2016 8.15 Cyngerdd Agoriadol Eisteddfod Genedlaethol Sir Fynwy a’r Cyffiniau 9.45 Pethe: Stori Coronau y ‘Steddfod 10.15 Pum Merch, Tri Chopa, Un Cwch 10.45-11.50 Gwawr Edwards yn Ohio

CHANNEL 4

Friday night Dinner, 10pm 6.10

Dare To Believe: Ali Jawad (rpt) (HD) 6.15 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 6.40 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.05 3rd Rock From The Sun (rpt) 7.30 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.30 Frasier (rpt) 9.00 Frasier (rpt) 9.25 Dare To Believe: Hannah Cockroft (rpt) (HD) 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 10.00 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 10.30 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.00 The Simpsons (rpt) 11.30 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 12.35 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.35 Glorious Goodwood: Channel 4 Racing (HD) 4.00 The Question Jury (HD) 5.00 Couples Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD)

6.00 The SImPSonS (13/25) The family is brainwashed by a religious cult – except for Marge. (rpt) 6.30 hollyoAkS Nancy is annoyed when Darren allows Maxine and Minnie to stay with them, while Adam, Jesse and Neeta worry about the new posters bearing her photograph. (HD) 7.00 ChAnnel 4 newS Latest headlines. (HD) 8.00 new AmAzInG SPACeS SheD oF The SerIeS yeAr George Clarke begins his annual quest for 2016 by turning his attentions to those sheds in the Unique and Historic categories. (HD) 9.00 CeleBrITy FIrST DATeS Presenter Sian Lloyd, actor Daniel Brocklebank and reality TV stars Jess Woodley and Musharaf Asghar go in search of romance with members of the public. (HD) 10.00 FrIDAy nIGhT DInner (2/6) Dad’s annual hinge oiling evening arrives, but when he spills some of the commodity on Mum’s beloved carpet, it’s a race against time to clean it up before she finds out. (HD) 10.35 ruDe TuBe (5/8) Alex Zane counts down the top 50 pranks from the worldwide web, featuring a memorable drive-through stunt and a trick played on film star Zac Efron in his own limousine. (rpt) (HD) 11.35 mAn Down (3/6) Dan struggles to get his “news” taken seriously, while Brian meets the woman of his dreams – and the children of his nightmares. (rpt) 12.05 Dare To Believe: Hannah Cockroft (rpt) (HD) 12.10 FILM: District 9 (2009) Sci-fi drama, starring Sharlto Copley. (W) (HD) 2.00 Peep Show (rpt) (SL) (HD) 2.30 I’m Spazticus (rpt) (SL) (HD) 2.55 Dare To Believe: Jordanne Whiley (rpt) (HD) 3.00 Location, Location, Location (rpt) (HD) 3.55 George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces (rpt) (HD) 4.50 Draw It! (rpt) (HD) 5.10 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under (rpt) (HD)

CHANNEL 5

It’s not me, It’s you, 10pm 6.00

Milkshake! The WotWots (rpt) 6.10 Chloe’s Closet (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Lily’s Driftwood Bay (rpt) (HD) 6.30 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 6.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.45 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Little Princess (rpt) 7.10 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Thomas & Friends (rpt) 7.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.05 Wissper (HD) 8.15 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.25 Peppa Pig (rpt) 8.35 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Toot The Tiny Tugboat (rpt) (HD) 9.00 Bananas In Pyjamas (rpt) 9.15 The Wright Stuff (HD) 11.15 Celebrity Big Brother: The Launch (rpt) (HD) 1.10 5 News Lunchtime (HD) 1.15 Home And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 NCIS (rpt) (HD) 3.10 Rosamunde Pilcher: The Unknown Heart (rpt) (HD) 5.00 5 News At 5 (HD) 5.30 Neighbours (rpt) (HD)

6.00 home AnD AwAy Alf forces Roo to admit she needs help, VJ makes it clear to Billie he wants to build a family with her and Hunter is stunned when he finds out Andy confessed to killing Charlotte. (rpt) 6.30 5 newS TonIGhT Latest headlines. (HD) 7.00 FunnIeST FAIlS, FAllS & FloPS (16/20) Gravity takes its toll on a succession of the unwary, a ferry crashes into a jetty and a vehicle delivers its passengers straight through their hotel doors. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 8.00 20 momenTS ThAT roCkeD The 90S Cold Feet star Helen Baxendale presents a countdown of memorable moments from the 1990s, including the death of Diana, Princess of Wales and the chart battle between Blur and Oasis. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 5 News Update. (HD) 9.00 CeleBrITy BIG BroTher Highlights from launch night as a fresh group of familiar faces make their way down the staircase into the house that for some will be their home for the next few weeks.

(HD) Followed by The Health Lottery draw.

10.00 IT’S noT me, IT’S you (5/8) Relationship-based comedy panel show, with Eamonn Holmes. (HD) 10.30 CeleBrITy BIG BroTher’S BIT on The SIDe Rylan Clark-Neal presents the spin-off show, featuring gossip, chat and features from the house.

Including a debate on the burning issues. (HD) 11.35 lIP SynC BATTle (6/20) Hayden Panettiere and Eva Longoria take part in the music challenge. (HD) 12.00 SuperCasino 3.10 Celebrity Big Brother (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Lip Sync Battle US: Star Trek Special (rpt) (HD) 4.50 Chinese Food In Minutes (rpt) 5.10 Angels Of Jarm (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

5STAr

5uSA

8.00am That ’70s Show 8.20 Film: Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007) (U) 10.15 That ’70s Show 11.05 My Wife and Kids 12.00noon Dance Moms 1.00 Celebrity Big Brother: Live Launch 3.00 Neighbours 3.30 Home and Away 4.00 8 Simple Rules 5.00 Dance Moms 5.50 Access 6.00 Neighbours 6.30 Home and Away 7.00 Dance Moms 8.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away 9.00 Film: The Count of Monte Cristo (2002) (PG) Swashbuckling adventure.

12.00midnight Celebrity Big Brother: Live from the House

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Diagnosis Murder 10.00 Access 10.10 Film: Deadly Isolation (2005) (12) Thriller, starring Sherilyn Fenn. 12.00noon CSI: NY 1.00 NCIS 2.00 Person of Interest 3.00 Person of Interest 4.00 NCIS 5.00 CSI: NY 6.00 CSI: Miami 7.00 NCIS 8.00 NCIS 9.00 Rookie Blue 10.00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 11.00 CSI: NY 12.00midnight CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 1.00 CSI: Miami 2.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 3.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 3.45 Access 4.00 Teleshopping

Friday

29 July 2016 ITV2 6.00am Planet’s Funniest Animals 6.20 Dinner Date 7.10 Ellen DeGeneres 8.00 Emmerdale 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! 9.30 Psych 10.20 Royal Pains 11.15 Dinner Date 12.15pm Emmerdale 1.15 You’ve Been Framed! 1.45 Ellen DeGeneres 2.35 Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 6.50 The Hot Desk: Adam Lambert 7.00 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed! 8.00 Two and a Half Men 9.00 Film: Fast & Furious (12) 11.10 Family Guy 12.10am American Dad! 1.10 Two and a Half Men ITV3 6.00am Doctor in the House 6.25 Heartbeat 7.25 Where the Heart Is 8.25 The Royal 9.30 Judge Judy 10.55 Murder, She Wrote 11.55 Love Your Garden 12.55pm Heartbeat 2.00 The Royal 3.05 Where the Heart Is 4.10 Doctor in the House 4.45 On the Buses 5.20 Man About the House 5.55 Heartbeat 6.55 Murder, She Wrote 8.00 Birds of a Feather 9.00 Paul O’Grady: For the Love of Dogs 10.00 Law & Order: UK 11.00 Wycliffe 12.10am Film: Steptoe and Son (PG) ITV4 6.00am Gunsmoke 6.50 Minder 7.45 Ironside 8.50 Quincy ME 9.50 Ax Men 10.50 The Chase 11.50 Gunsmoke 12.50pm Pawn Stars 1.50 The Saint 2.50 Minder 3.55 Quincy ME 5.00 Ironside 6.00 The Saint 7.00 Pawn Stars 8.00 Film: A View to a Kill (PG) 10.45 Film: Awake (15) 12.30am Film: The Big Lebowski (18) BBC Four 7.00pm News 7.30 BBC Proms 2016: Haitink Conducts Mahler. Mahler’s Third Symphony. 9.15 Sounds of the Eighties 10.15 BBC Proms 2016: David Bowie. A celebration and reinterpretation of the music of David Bowie. 12.00midnight David Bowie – Five Years in the Making of an Icon 1.30 The Genius of David Bowie Sky 1 6.00am Supergirl 7.00 The Flash 9.00 Futurama 10.00 Ninja Warrior Women Tournament 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles 12.00noon Hawaii Five-0 1.00 Supergirl 2.00 The Flash 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.00 Modern Family 9.00 A League of Their Own 10.00 The Last Ship 11.00 Zoo 12.00midnight NCIS: Los Angeles 1.00 Hawaii Five-0 Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am Fish Town 7.00 Urban Secrets 8.00 Cold Case 10.00 The West Wing 11.00 House 12.00noon Without a Trace 1.00 Blue Bloods 2.00 Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets 3.00 Cold Case 5.00 The West Wing 6.00 House 7.00 Without a Trace 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 The Fall: Decker vs Budd 10.50 Oz 1.20am Curb Your Enthusiasm 1.55 Cold Case Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Maya the Bee Movie (U) 7.45 Ghostbusters: Special 8.15 McFarland, USA (PG) 10.30 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (PG) 12.15pm Ant-Man (12) 2.15 Burnt (15) 4.00 Maya the Bee Movie (U) 5.45 McFarland, USA (PG) 8.00 Burnt (15) 9.45 Ant-Man (12) 11.45 Swelter (15) 1.30am Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (15) FIlm4 11.00am Swiss Family Robinson (1960,U) 1.30pm Fast Girls (2012,12) 3.15 Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989,U) 5.00 Millions (2004,12) 6.55 Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986,15) 9.00 The Transporter (2002,15) 10.45 Oldboy (18) 12.50am 12 Rounds (15) CBS ACTIon 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 JAG 10.00 MacGyver 11.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 12.00noon Star Trek 1.00 Bonanza 2.00 NCIS 4.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 5.00 JAG 6.00 Star Trek: A Captain’s Log 7.20 The Twilight Zone 8.00 Star Trek: Deep Space Nine 9.00 NCIS 10.00 Bad Girls 11.00 Walker, Texas Ranger 12.00midnight NCIS 2.45 The Streets of San Francisco CBS reAlITy 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Judge Judy 10.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 11.00 Unsolved Mysteries 12.00noon Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction?

1.00 Judge Judy 3.00 It’s a Miracle with Roma Downey 4.00 Unsolved Mysteries 5.00 Judge Judy 7.00 Medical Detectives 8.00 Troubled Teens: Jail Shock 9.00 Contract Killers 10.00 24 Hours to Kill 11.00 Medical Detectives 12.00midnight I Survived 1.00 Contract Killers Sky SPorTS 1 6.00am Football League Gold 6.30 WWE Main Event 7.30 ATP Masters Tennis 8.30 Live Super Rugby 10.30 Sporting Triumphs 10.45 Live International Champions Cup Football 1.15pm International Champions Cup Football 1.45 Football’s Greatest Players 2.15 Sporting Triumphs 2.30 ATP Tour Uncovered 3.00 ATP Masters Tennis 4.00 Live ATP Masters Tennis. The Rogers Cup. 10.30 Sporting Greats 11.30 Live ATP Masters Tennis. The Rogers Cup

BBC 1

The getaway Car, 5.55pm 6.00

Breakfast (T) (W) (HD) 10.00 Saturday Kitchen Live (T) (W) (HD) 11.30 Home Cooking Made Easy (rpt) 12.00 BBC News, (T) Weather (W) (HD) 12.10 TBA 1.30 Inspire: The Olympic Journey. Gabby Logan catches up with diver Tom Daley as the Rio Games draw near, while Darren Campbell meets sprinter Dina Asher-Smith and Kat Downes interviews gymnast Max Whitlock. (T) (HD) 2.00 TBA 2.45 TBA 3.30 TBA 5.05 Now You See It (T) (W) 5.35 BBC News (T) (W) (HD) 5.45 Local News, (T) Weather (W) 5.55 The Getaway Car. This week’s contestants on the driving challenge include a pair of flatmates from Hertfordshire, plus a father and son who are always competing with each other. (T) (HD)

BBC 2

Proms Extra, 7pm 6.15

The Women’s Football Show. A look at the biggest issues in the women’s game, focusing on matters at both club and international level. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 6.45 TBA 8.25 TBA 10.00 TBA 10.45 TBA 11.00 Sportswomen (T) (W) 11.30 TBA 12.00 The Hairy Bikers’ Northern Exposure. Si King and Dave Myers circumnavigate the Baltic Sea in search of the most exciting food in Europe.

The sea is surrounded by nine countries, which are home to more than 85 million people, so Si and Dave set out to sample the produce of the vast region. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 1.00 TBA 2.00 Golf: Women’s British Open.

Hazel Irvine presents live coverage of the third day of the Major from Woburn Golf & Country Club in Milton Keynes. South Korea’s Ko Jin-young and Taiwan’s Teresa Lu both shot rounds of 69 at this stage last year, to lead the way by a single stroke heading into the final round. With commentary by Peter Alliss, Ken Brown, Maureen Madill and Andrew Cotter. (T) (W) (HD)

6.45 PoiNTLESS CELEBRiTiES Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman present as famous faces take part in the general knowledge quiz in which they try to come up with the least likely correct answers to a series of questions posed to members of the public. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 7.35 THE NATioNAL LoTTERy: FiVE STAR FAmiLy REuNioN A UK family and their long-lost overseas relatives must work together in order to win a once-in-a-lifetime reunion in a five-star location. The overseas family must answer questions to win time for their relatives in the UK studio, who will then individually answer questions against the clock. Nick Knowles hosts. Includes the all-important weekend draw. (T) (W) (HD) 8.30 THE muSkETEERS (9/10) Death arrives at the Louvre, and Treville takes controversial steps to protect the vulnerable Dauphin from the unholy alliance of Grimaud, Gaston and the Duke of Lorraine. However, his secretive tactics further isolate the Queen at court, and even threaten to drive a wedge between his loyal Musketeers. With the disbanded Red Guards at Lucien’s disposal, Constance and Sylvie work together to hide the young prince within a Paris crawling with spies.

Meanwhile, Treville hopes to wield his new sword – politics – to divide the opposition. Swashbucking drama, starring Hugo Speer. (T) (W) (HD) 9.25 CASuALTy Hospital drama with the staff of Holby’s accident and emergency department. (HD) 10.15 BBC NEWS, WEATHER Latest headlines. (HD) 10.35 TBA 11.30 TBA Followed by Weather For The Week Ahead.

6.00 TBA 7.00 PRomS ExTRA The focus falls on Tippett’s A Child of Our Time this week, as Katie Derham presents another edition of the Proms’ weekly companion show. She also turns attention to Vaughan Williams’ The Lark Ascending, which has long been considered Britain’s favourite piece of classical music. Plus, David Owen Norris hits another Chord Of The Week. (T) (W) (HD) 7.40 gARDENERS’ WoRLD Classic comedy chronicling the misadventures of the hapless members of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard during the Second World War. Starring Arthur Lowe as the overbearing Captain Mainwaring, with supporting roles from John Le Mesurier, Ian Lavender and Clive Dunn. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) 8.10 TBA 8.40 DAD’S ARmy Classic comedy chronicling the misadventures of the hapless members of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard during the Second World War. Starring Arthur Lowe, John Le Mesurier, Ian Lavender and Clive Dunn. (rpt) (T) 9.10 TBA 10.10 TBA 10.40 VERSAiLLES Period drama depicting the decadent and turbulent early reign of Louis XIV. (rpt) (T) (W) (HD) Followed by Inside Versailles. (T) (W) 11.40 TBA

1.05

1.05

BBC News. Catch up with the latest headlines. (T) (HD)

TBA 2.30 This Is BBC Two. Upcoming programmes. (HD)

IT V

Crank, 10.15pm 6.00

CITV: Fort Boyard Ultimate Challenge (rpt) 6.25 Pat & Stan (rpt) (SL) (W) 6.35 Dino Dan (rpt) (SL) (W) 6.45 Dino Dan (rpt) (SL) (W) 6.55 Signed Stories (rpt) (SL) (W) 7.00 Sooty (rpt) (W) 7.15 Super 4 (rpt) (W) 7.35 Thunderbirds Are Go (rpt) (W) 8.00 Ninjago: Rise Of The Snakes (rpt) (W) 8.25 ITV News (W) 8.30 Weekend (W) 9.25 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) (HD) 10.25 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) (HD) 11.25 Who’s Doing The Dishes? (rpt) (W) (HD) 12.25 ITV News, Weather (W) 12.40 The Wine Show (W) (HD) 1.45 Wild Animal Reunions (rpt) (W) (HD) 2.45 Doc Martin (rpt) (W) 3.45 Big Box Little Box. Tom Baker narrates the consumer show, which sees members of five households across the length and breadth of Britain take delivery of a batch of the latest gadgets and gizmos before sharing their thoughts on the items. (rpt) (W) (HD) 4.15 Britain’s Favourite Dogs. A countdown of the nation’s 10 favourite breeds, based on a survey of 1,000 dog owners, discovering how the favourites have changed over the years. (rpt) (W) (HD) 5.15 The Chase. Bradley Walsh presents as four contestants answer general knowledge questions and work as a team to take on ruthless quiz genius the Chaser and secure a cash prize. (rpt) (W) (HD)

6.15 LoCAL NEWS, WEATHER Regional bulletin. (W) 6.30 iTV NEWS, WEATHER Latest headlines. (W) 6.45 you’VE BEEN FRAmED! Harry Hill narrates a comical selection of mishaps filmed by viewers, featuring everything from giddy grandmas, cute kids and crazy animals to below-the-belt mishaps, practical jokers and painful-looking accidents. (rpt) 7.15 CATCHPHRASE Stephen Mulhern hosts the gameshow, asking three contestants to “see it and say it” as they try to guess the familiar phrases.

After the first elimination, the two remaining players battle to reach the Super Catchphrase round, where one of them could win £50,000. (W) (HD) 8.00 TBA 10.00 iTV NEWS, WEATHER Latest headlines. (W) 10.15 (2006) An assassin faces a race FiLm CRANk against time when he learns a rival has poisoned him with a drug that will kill him if his heart rate drops below a certain level. As he sets out to take revenge on his enemies, he has to resort to increasingly desperate acts to keep his adrenaline pumping. Action thriller, with Jason Statham, Amy Smart and Jose Pablo Cantillo. (W) (HD) 12.00 Jackpot247. Live interactive gaming. (W) 3.00 Murder, She Wrote (rpt) (SL) (HD) 3.50 ITV Nightscreen (W) (HD)

l (1/3) Episode Number (W) Widescreen (rpt) Repeat (T) Teletext (AD) Audio Description (SL) Sign Language (HD) High Definition

REgioNAL VARiATioNS

BBC2 SCoTLAND As BBC2 except: 10.40-11.40 TBA BBC2 NoRTHERN iRELAND As BBC2 except: 7.40 Greatest Gardens. Designer Diarmuid Gavin and broadcaster and plantswoman Helen Dillon visit gardens around Northern Ireland.

8.10 Gardeners’ World. Horticultural advice. 8.40-9.10 TBA iTV mERiDiAN As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV CENTRAL As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather. Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV WESTCouNTRy As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather 6.15-6.30 Local News. All the latest headlines and sport from

across the region. 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast. iTV ANgLiA As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather 6.15-6.30 Local News. Latest headlines and sport. 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV yoRkSHiRE As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV TyNE TEES As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV gRANADA As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather.

Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV BoRDER As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather. Latest forecast. 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV WEST As ITV except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather 6.15-6.30

Local News. Latest headlines and sport. 10.14-10.15 Local Weather iTV WALES As ITV WEST except: 12.39-12.40 Local Weather 6.15-6.30 Local News 10.14-10.15 Local Weather. Latest forecast.

S4C 6.00 Cyw. Entertainment and fun for children. 8.00 Stwnsh Sadwrn. Lois, Tudur and Barri present fun, games and competitions.

10.00 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol. Live coverage from the Pavilion in Abergavenny, as the first full day of the 2016 Eisteddfod gets under way. 2016 1.30 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol 2016. Continued coverage from Abergavenny. 3.00 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol 2016. Further coverage from the 2016 Eisteddfod. 6.15 Newyddion a Chwaraeon 6.30 TBA 7.00 Noson Lawen 8.00 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol 2016 9.00 TBA 10.00 Ar y Dibyn 11.00 Eisteddfod Genedlaethol 2016

CHANNEL 4

The Superhumans Show, 11am 6.05

Gillette World Sport 6.30 World Endurance Motorsport 2016 (HD) 6.55 Dare To Believe: Ali Jawad (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Swansea Triathlon (HD) 7.30 Mini Challenge (HD) 8.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 8.30 Everybody Loves Raymond. The Barones watch Geoffrey having trouble getting the hang of a game, but Ray learns the hard way that his son’s lack of ability should not interfere with his enjoyment. (rpt) 9.00 The Morning Line (HD) 10.00 Car SOS. Presenter Tim Shaw, master mechanic Fuzz Townshend and a team of experts head to Eastbourne in East Sussex to take on an iconic French front-wheel drive car. The vehicle in question is a 1954 Citroën Traction Avant belonging to former watchmaker and classic car lover Andrew. Last in the series. (rpt) (HD) 11.00 The Superhumans Show. Alex Brooker and Iwan Thomas present the sporting magazine show providing coverage of all things Paralympics, including the latest news from qualifying events around the world, and profiles of established and emerging competitors who will be seeking glory in Brazil later this summer. (HD) 11.30 The Big Bang Theory. Sheldon presses Leonard and Penny to choose a date for their wedding, while he also has to deal with dramatic changes in his own relationship with Amy. Comedy, starring Johnny Galecki, Jim Parsons and Kaley Cuoco. (rpt) (HD)

12.00 The BIg BAng Theory Leonard and Penny attempt to prove Sheldon wrong when he claims that he and Amy have a superior relationship. (rpt) (HD) 12.30 Come dIne wITh me A&E doctor Sukhi Bhullar, support worker Louise Woodward-Styles, boxer Shinny Davenport and HR manager Fiona Morris host dinner parties in Salford for a chance to win the £1,000 prize. The week includes high-minded conversation, probing questions and a Jewish-style Friday-night dinner. (rpt) (HD) 1.30 ChAnnel 4 rACIng Live coverage. (HD) 4.15 A PlACe In The Sun: Summer Sun (HD) 5.15 TBA 5.20 ChAnnel 4 newS Latest headlines. (HD) 5.45 FormulA 1 2016 germAn grAnd PrIx QuAlIFyIng hIghlIghTS Steve Jones presents the best of the qualifying from the 12th round of the season at the Hockenheimring. (HD) 7.30 TBA 9.00 TBA 11.30 TBA 1.30

TBA 1.35 TBA 3.25 Hollyoaks (rpt) (SL) (HD) 5.25 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under (rpt) (HD)

CHANNEL 5

The Saturday Show live, 9am 6.00

Milkshake! Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 6.10 Wanda And The Alien (rpt) (HD) 6.20 Pets (rpt) (HD) 6.25 Noddy In Toyland (rpt) 6.40 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 6.50 Little Princess (rpt) 7.05 Pip Ahoy! (rpt) (HD) 7.20 Blaze And The Monster Machines (rpt) (HD) 7.50 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.00 Shimmer And Shine (HD) 8.25 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (rpt) (HD) 9.00 The Saturday Show Live (HD) 11.00 Police Interceptors (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Police Interceptors (rpt) (HD) 1.00 Police Interceptors (rpt) (HD) 2.00 Police Interceptors (rpt) (HD) 3.00 Can’t Pay? Final Demand (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (rpt) (HD) 5.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away (rpt) (HD)

6.00 CAn’T PAy? we’ll TAke IT AwAy (2/13) Kevin Stokes and Brian O’Shaughnessy get into a doorstep confrontation with a debtor who wants to prove her family business is bankrupt. However, when tempers flare Brian is assaulted and the agents call the police. Elsewhere, Paul Bohill and Steve Pinner face evicting three properties owned by the same landlord in north London, and Brian and Delroy Anglin collect £2,000 debt owed to a vet. (rpt) (HD) 7.00 nCIS: loS AngeleS (12/24) A taxi driver recently released from prison is murdered just hours after sending an e-mail to an old alias that Callen used when he went undercover to investigate three marines who stole $5million. Resuming the persona, Callen goes in search of the gang, one of whom is killed in a drive-by shooting. (rpt) (HD) 8.00 nCIS (24/24) The team investigates a global terrorist group that is recruiting teens via the Internet, following a deadly bombing overseas. (HD) 8.55 5 newS weekend The day’s headlines. (HD) 9.00 CeleBrITy BIg BroTher Highlights of the famous housemates’ past 24 hours under the all-seeing eye of Big Brother, as they try to get used to living alongside one another. (HD) Followed by The Health Lottery draw.

10.00 TBA 11.00 The rylAn Show The best of the week’s late-night entertainment, hosted by Rylan ClarkNeal, giving viewers a chance to catch up with the host’s celebrity guests, music and games. (HD) 12.00 SuperCasino. Live interactive gaming. 3.10 Celebrity Big Brother (rpt) (HD) 4.00 TBA 4.50 Divine Designs (rpt) (SL) 5.20 Nick’s Quest (rpt) (SL) 5.45 Angels Of Jarm (rpt) (SL) 5.50 Roary The Racing Car (rpt) (SL)

l All programme details are correct at time of going to press

5STAr

5uSA

6.00am Teleshopping 8.00 That ’70s Show 8.30 That ’70s Show 9.00 My Wife and Kids 9.30 My Wife and Kids 10.00 My Wife and Kids 10.30 My Wife and Kids 11.00 My Wife and Kids 11.30 My Wife and Kids 12.00noon My Wife and Kids 12.30 My Wife and Kids 1.00 My Wife and Kids 1.30 My Wife and Kids 2.00 Celebrity Big Brother 3.00 TBA 5.20 TBA 8.00 TBA 10.00 TBA 12.00midnight The Magicians 1.00 American Horror Story 2.00 Sing It On! 3.00 Ridiculousness 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping

6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Catch a Contractor 9.30 Diagnosis Murder 10.30 Diagnosis Murder 11.30 Mr & Mrs Murder 12.30pm Film: Abducted: The Carlina White Story (2012) (12) 2.30 Film: Deadly Isolation (2005) (12) 4.30 The Mysteries of Laura 5.30 Film: Columbo: Murder by the Book (1971) (PG) 7.00 Film: Cradle of Lies (2015) (PG) 9.00 NCIS 10.00 The Mysteries of Laura 11.00 The Mysteries of Laura 12.00midnight CSI: Miami 1.00 CSI: NY 3.00 Chicago Fire 4.00-6.00 Teleshopping

Saturday 30 July 2016

ITV2 6.00am Emmerdale 9.00 Coronation Street 11.30 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed! 12.30pm Ninja Warrior UK 1.30 Film: Batteries Not Included (1987,PG) 2.30 FYI Daily 2.35 Film: Batteries Not Included (1987,PG) 3.35 Film: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989,PG) 4.35 FYI Daily 4.40 Film: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989,PG) 5.25 Film: King Kong (2005,12) 6.25 FYI Daily 6.30 Film: King Kong (2005,12) 9.00 Film: Hot Fuzz (2007,15) 10.00 FYI Daily 10.05 Film: Hot Fuzz (2007,15) 11.20 Family Guy 12.55am American Dad! 1.50 The Cleveland Show 2.45 Teleshopping ITV3 6.20amWhere the Heart Is 8.00 Inspector Morse 10.25 A Touch of Frost 12.40pm Film: Blue Murder at St Trinian’s (1957,PG) 1.40 FYI Daily 1.45 Film: Blue Murder at St Trinian’s (1957,PG) 2.30 Jane Eyre 4.55 Midsomer Murders 7.00 Doc Martin 8.00 Lewis 10.00 Foyle’s War 12.00midnight Inspector Morse ITV4 6.00am Ax Men 7.25 Motorsport UK 8.25 The Saint 9.30 Shed and Buried 10.30 Storage Wars 11.30 Pawn Stars 2.05pm British Superbike Championship Highlights 3.05 Film: The Land That Time Forgot (1975,PG) 4.15 FYI Daily 4.20 Film: The Land That Time Forgot (1975,PG) 5.00 Monster Carp 6.00 The Motorbike Show 7.00 The Hand of God: 30 Years On 8.00 Film: Open Range (2003,12) 9.15 FYI Daily 9.20 Film: Open Range (2003,12) 10.50 Film: Unforgiven (1992,15) 11.50 FYI Daily 11.55 Film: Unforgiven (1992,15) 1.25am Minder 2.15 Ax Men BBC Four 7.00pm Roger Bannister: Everest on the Track 8.00 Tutankhamun: The Truth Uncovered 9.00 Beck 10.30 TBA 12.00midnight Roy Orbison: One of the Lonely Ones 1.00 The Kinks at the BBC 2.00 Cilla at the BBC 3.00 Top of the Pops: 1982 Sky 1 6.00am The Dog Whisperer 7.00 Ashley Banjo’s Secret Street Crew 9.00 The F1 Show 9.30 What’s Up? 10.00 Futurama 12.30pm Finding Pixar 1.00 Modern Family 7.00 The Simpsons 8.00 Guitar Star 9.00 Agatha Raisin 10.00 Film: Underworld: Evolution (2006,18) 12.00midnight A League of Their Own 1.00 TBA 3.00 Road Wars 4.00 Border Security: Canada’s Front Line 5.00 Gordonstoun: A Different Class Sky ATlAnTIC 6.00am The Petrol Age 7.00 David Attenborough’s Conquest of the Skies 8.00 Cold Case 11.00 David Attenborough’s Kingdom of Plants 12.00noon Blue Bloods 5.00 Without a Trace 9.00 Game of Thrones 11.35 Last Week Tonight with John Oliver 12.10am Curb Your Enthusiasm 1.30 Cold Case 2.30 Six Feet Under 4.00 The Petrol Age 5.00 David Attenborough’s Conquest of the Skies Sky CInemA PremIere 6.00am Wolves (2014,18) 7.45 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti (2016,PG) 9.30 Ant-Man (2015,12) 11.30 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) 1.45pm Minions (2015,U) 3.30 Swelter (2014,15) 5.15 Ant-Man (2015,12) 7.15 Minions (2015,U) 9.00 Burnt (2015,15) 10.45 Scouts Guide To The Zombie Apocalypse (2015,15) 12.20am Wolves (2014,18) 1.55 Burnt (2015,15) 3.40 McFarland, USA (2015,PG) FIlm4 11.00am Captain Ron (1992,PG) 1.00pm Sister Act (1992,PG) 3.05 Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules (2011,U) 5.05 Napoleon Dynamite (2004,PG) 6.55 Tower Heist (2011,12) 9.00 Predator (1987,18) 11.10 Terminator Salvation (2009,12) 1.25am TBA 3.45 Close CBS ACTIon 6.00am Teleshopping 8.30 The Key of David 9.00 Star Trek 12.00noon Star Trek: A Captain’s Log 1.20 The Twilight Zone 2.00 The High Chaparral 4.00 Dr Quinn: Medicine Woman 6.00 Gunsmoke 8.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 9.00 NCIS 1.55am Film: Gunsmoke: One Man’s Justice (1994,PG) CBS reAlITy 6.00am Teleshopping 9.00 Judge Judy 3.00pm Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction? 5.00 Unsolved Mysteries 7.00 Hoarders 9.00 Forensic Investigators 3.00am Teleshopping 4.00 Rapid Response Sky SPorTS 1 6.00am Football Gold 7.00 Sporting Rivalries 7.30 ATP Masters Tennis 8.30 Live Super Rugby 10.30 Super Heroes 11.00 ATP Masters Tennis 12.00noon Live Formula 1 2.35 The Fantasy Football Club 3.30 International Champions Cup Football 4.00 The Boys of 66 5.30 Live International Champions Cup Football 8.30 Live Fight Night 12.00midnight International Champions Cup Football

sUNDAY

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.00am Dev. 10.00 Matt edmondson. 1.00pm Alice Levine.

4.00 Cel Spellman. 7.00 Rock Show.

10.00 Phil taggart. 1.00am Monki.

4.00-6.30 Nick Bright. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 6.00am Sunday hour. 7.00 Clare Balding. 9.05 Steve wright. 11.00 Michael Ball. 1.00pm elaine Paige. 3.00 Johnnie walker.

5.00 Paul o’Grady. 7.00 Claudia on Sunday. 9.00 Clare teal. 11.00 Don Black. Midnight After Midnight. 3.005.00 Sounds of the 60s. RADIO 3

the British Isles And Beyond. 7.00 News. 7.10 Sunday. 8.00 News.

8.10 Sunday worship. 8.48 A Point of View. 9.00 Broadcasting house.

10.00 the Archers. 10.30 (Lw) test Match Special. 11.15 (fM) Desert Island Discs. Noon (fM) News.

12.04 (Lw) test Match Special. 12.04 (fM) I’m Sorry I haven’t A Clue.

12.30 (fM) the food Programme.

1.00 (fM) the world this weekend.

1.30 (fM) Power of the whips: the Silent enforcers. 2.00 (fM) Gardeners’ Question time. 2.45

(fM) the Listening Project. 3.00 (fM) Drama: Primo Levi’s the Periodic table. 4.00 (fM) Drama: Primo Levi’s the Periodic table. 4.25 (fM) the Listening Project. 4.30 (fM) Adrian Mitchell: to whom It May Concern. 5.00 (fM) file on 4. 5.40 (fM) Profile. 5.54 Shipping forecast.

5.57 (Lw) test Match Special. 6.00 (fM) News. 6.15 Pick of the week.

7.00 the Archers. 7.15 Drama: Primo Levi’s the Periodic table.

7.30 Clap Clap: A Brief history of Applause. 7.45 the Crime writer

At the festival. 8.00 feedback. 8.30 Last word. 9.00 Money Box. 9.30 Analysis.10.00 the westminster hour. 11.00 the film Programme.

11.30 Something Understood.

Midnight News. 12.15 thinking Allowed. 12.48 Shipping forecast.

1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.205.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am wake Up to Money. 6.00 Sunday Breakfast.

9.00 Sportsweek. 10.00 wake Up to Money. 11.00 Raising the Bar with Rob Rinder. Noon 5 Live

Sport. 1.00 5 Live formula 1. 3.00 5 Live Sport. 6.00 5 Life. 7.30 the 5 Live hit List. 10.00 Stephen Nolan.

1.00am-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.02am our Story. 6.30 New every Sunday.

7.04 Cathy Macdonald Gets Personal.

7.32 the kitchen Cafe. 8.00 Good Morning Scotland. 10.05 Richard holloway. 12.05pm Sportsound. 5.05 take the floor. 7.05 travelling folk.

9.05 Classics Unwrapped. 11.05 Billy Sloan. 1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

MONDAY

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.30am the Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat.

1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James.

7.00 huw Stephens. 9.00 Radio 1’s Playlists: University of warwick’s Musical Interrailing Playlist. 10.00 Phil taggart. 1.00am friction. 4.006.30 Adele Roberts. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 5.00am Suzi Perry. 6.30 Chris evans. 9.30 ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Mark Goodier.

5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Paul Jones.

8.00 Ana Matronic. 10.00 kiki Dee: I’ve Got the Music In Me. 11.00 the Art of Artists. Midnight After Midnight. 3.00-5.00 Johnnie walker’s Sounds of the 70s. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 6.30am Breakfast.

9.00 essential Classics. Noon Composer of the week: Brahms.

1.00 News. 1.02 BBC Proms Chamber Music. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In tune. 6.30 Composer of the week: Brahms. 7.30 BBC Proms 2016. 10.15 Proms extra Late. 11.00 Jazz Now. 12.30am-6.30 through

the Night. RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 farming today. 6.00 today. 9.00 the Long View. 9.30 In therapy. 9.45 (Lw) Daily Service. 9.45 (fM) Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 10.00 woman’s hour. 10.30 (Lw) test Match Special. 11.00 (fM) the Untold. 11.30 (fM) way out east. Noon (fM) News. 12.01 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 12.04 (Lw) test Match Special. 12.04 one to one.

12.15 (fM) You And Yours. 12.57 (fM) weather. 1.00 (fM) the world

At one. 1.45 (fM) Shakespeare’s Restless world. 2.00 (fM) the Archers. 2.15 (fM) Drama: Brief Lives. 3.00 (fM) Counterpoint. 3.30 (fM) the food Programme. 4.00 (fM) with Great Pleasure. 4.30 (fM) the Infinite Monkey Cage. 5.00 (fM) PM. 5.54 (Lw) Shipping forecast.

5.57 (Lw) test Match Special. 5.57 (fM) weather. 6.00 (fM) News.

6.30 (fM) I’m Sorry I haven’t A Clue. 6.45 (Lw) I’m Sorry I haven’t A Clue. 7.00 the Archers. 7.15 front Row. 7.45 highLites – Natural

Bounce. 8.00 the Corbyn Story. 8.30 Crossing Continents. 9.00 Natural histories. 9.30 the Long View. 10.00 the world tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Dirt Road. 11.00 word of Mouth. 11.30 the Design Dimension.

Midnight News And weather.

12.30 Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 12.48 Shipping forecast. 1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.20-5.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am Morning Reports.

5.15 wake Up to Money. 6.00 5

Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily.

1.00pm Afternoon edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 the Monday Night Club. 9.00 the tuffers And Vaughan Cricket Show. 10.30 Phil williams.

1.00am-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Good Morning Scotland. 9.00 kaye Adams. Noon John Beattie. 1.32 Personal Best. 2.05 Janice forsyth.

4.00 Newsdrive. 6.30 Bryan Burnett.

9.05 Vic Galloway. 11.05 Roddy hart.

1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

tUesDAY

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.30am Nick Grimshaw. 10.00 Clara Amfo. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 Scott Mills. 4.00 Greg James. 7.00 huw Stephens. 9.00 BBC Radio 1 And 1Xtra’s Stories. 10.00 Phil taggart. 1.00am Annie Nightingale.

4.00-6.30 Nick Bright. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 5.00am Suzi Perry.

6.30 Chris evans. 9.30 ken Bruce.

Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve wright. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Jamie Cullum. 8.00 Ana Matronic. 10.00 here we Come, the Monkees

At 50! 11.00 Nigel ogden. 11.30 Listen to the Band. Midnight After Midnight. 3.00-5.00 Sounds of the 80s. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 essential Classics. Noon Composer of the week. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In tune. 6.30 Composer of the week. 7.30 BBC Proms 2016. 10.00 Proms Composer In Conversation. 10.45 the essay. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am-6.30 through the Night. RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6

MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 farming today. 6.00 today. 9.00 front Row: the Cultural Response. 9.45 (Lw) Daily Service. 9.45 (fM) Book of the week. 10.00 woman’s hour. 10.30 (Lw) test Match Special. 11.00 (fM) Natural histories. 11.30 (fM) Marc Riley’s Musical time Machine. Noon (fM) News. 12.01 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 12.04 (Lw) test Match Special. 12.04 (fM) one to one.

12.15 (fM) Call You And Yours.

1.00 (fM) the world At one. 1.45 (fM) Shakespeare’s Restless world.

2.00 (fM) the Archers. 2.15 (fM) Drama: the Vicar, the Automaton And the talking Dog. 3.00 (fM) Short Cuts. 3.30 (fM) the human Zoo. 4.00 (fM) the Inevitable.

4.30 (fM) A Good Read. 5.00 (fM) PM. 5.54 (Lw) Shipping forecast.

5.57 (Lw) test Match Special. 6.00 (fM) News. 6.30 (fM) the Missing hancocks. 6.45 (Lw) the Missing hancocks. 7.00 the Archers. 7.15 front Row. 7.45 highLites – Natural Bounce. 8.00 the Battle for the US Constitution. 8.40 In touch. 9.00

Inside health. 9.30 front Row: the Cultural Response. 10.00 the world tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Dirt Road. 11.00 the Infinite Monkey Cage. 11.30 the Design Dimension.

Midnight News. 12.30 Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 12.48 Shipping forecast. 1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.20-5.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 wake Up to Money.

6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily. 1.00pm Afternoon edition.

4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport.

8.00 9.00 5 Live Sport. 10.00 5 Live Sport. 10.30 Phil williams.

1.00am-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Good Morning Scotland. 9.00 kaye Adams. Noon John Beattie. 1.32 Cathy Macdonald Gets Personal.

2.00 Bulletin. 2.05 Janice forsyth.

4.00 Newsdrive. 6.30 Bryan Burnett.

9.00 Bulletin. 9.05 Ricky Ross. 11.00 Bulletin. 11.05 the Iain Anderson Show. 1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

WeDNesDAY

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.30am the Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Scott Mills. 10.00 Adele Roberts. 12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 the Matt edmondson Show. 4.00 Greg James. 7.00 huw Stephens.

9.00 the Surgery with Gemma & Dr Radha. 10.00 Phil taggart. 1.00am Benji B. 4.00-6.30 Adele Roberts.

RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 5.00am Suzi Perry. 6.30 Chris evans. 9.30 ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve wright In the Afternoon.

5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 the folk

Show with Mark Radcliffe. 8.00 Ana Matronic. 10.00 Joan Collins – A Life In Lipstick. 11.00 the People’s Songs.

Midnight After Midnight. 3.00-5.00 Pick of the Pops. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 6.30am Breakfast.

9.00 essential Classics. Noon Composer of the week: Brahms.

1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 3.30 Choral evensong. 4.30 In tune. 6.00 Composer of the week: Brahms.

7.00 BBC Proms 2016. 9.30 New Generation Artists. 10.00 the Day

of the Locust: LA Apocalypse. 10.45 the essay: the five Photographs that (You Didn’t know) Changed everything. 11.00 Late Junction.

12.30am-6.30 through the Night.

RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 farming today.

6.00 today. 8.31 (Lw) Yesterday In Parliament. 9.00 Bringing Up Britain.

9.45 (Lw) Daily Service. 9.45 (fM) Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 10.00 woman’s hour. 10.56 the Listening Project.

11.00 the Corbyn Story. 11.30

Guilt trip. Noon News. 12.01 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 12.04 one to one. 12.15 You And Yours. 1.00 the world At one. 1.45 Shakespeare’s Restless world. 2.00 the Archers.

2.15 Drama: Black And Blue. 3.00 Money Box Live. 3.30 Inside health.

4.00 thinking Allowed. 4.30 the Media Show. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 6.00 News.

6.30 I’ve Never Seen Star wars.

7.00 the Archers. 7.15 front Row. 7.45 highLites – Natural Bounce.

8.00 the Moral Maze. 8.45 David

Baddiel tries to Understand. 9.00 Caravans In Space. 9.30 Bringing Up Britain. 10.00 the world tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Dirt Road. 11.00 expenses only.

11.15 Domestic Science. 11.30 the Design Dimension. Midnight News. 12.31 Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 12.48 Shipping forecast. 1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.20-5.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 wake Up to Money. 6.00 5 Live

Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily. 1.00pm Afternoon edition. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 7.30 ’66: that was then, this Is Now. 9.30 5 Live Boxing. 10.30 Phil williams.

1.00am-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Good Morning Scotland. 9.00 kaye Adams. Noon John Beattie. 1.32 our Story. 2.05 Janice forsyth. 4.00 Newsdrive. 6.30 Bryan Burnett. 9.05 the Jazz house. 11.05 Iain Anderson.

1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

tHURsDAY

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.30am the Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Scott Mills. 10.00 Clara Amfo.

12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 the Matt edmondson Show. 4.00 Greg James. 7.00 huw Stephens. 9.00 Radio 1’s Playlists: Netsky. 10.00 the Residency – heidi. Midnight the Residency – Logan Sama. 1.00 Jamz Supernova. 4.00-6.30 Adele Roberts. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 5.00am Suzi Perry. 6.30 Chris evans.

9.30 ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine.

2.00 Steve wright In the Afternoon.

5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Bob harris Country. 8.00 Ana Matronic. 10.00 the Radio 2 Arts Show with Jonathan Ross. Midnight After Midnight.

3.00-5.00 the Craig Charles house Party. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 6.30am Breakfast. 9.00 essential Classics. Noon Composer of the week: Brahms. 1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In tune.

6.30 Composer of the week: Brahms. 7.30 BBC Proms 2016.

10.00 A Secret Life: Uwe Johnson In

Sheerness. 10.45 the essay: the five Photographs that (You Didn’t know) Changed everything. 11.00 Late Junction. 12.30am-6.00 through the Night. RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 farming today. 6.00 today. 9.00 the Global Philosopher. 9.45 (Lw) Daily Service.

9.45 (fM) Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 10.00 woman’s hour. 11.00 Crossing Continents. 11.30 An obsessive type: the tale of the Doves typeface. Noon News. 12.01 (Lw)

Shipping forecast. 12.04 one to one. 12.15 You And Yours. 1.00 the world At one. 1.45 Shakespeare’s Restless world. 2.00 the Archers.

2.15 Drama: Black And Blue. 3.00 open Country. 3.30 open Book.

4.00 the film Programme. 4.30 BBC Inside Science. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 5.57 weather.

6.00 News. 6.30 Simon evans Goes to Market. 7.00 the Archers. 7.15 front Row. 7.45 highLites – Natural Bounce. 8.00 the Briefing Room.

8.30 In Business. 9.00 BBC Inside

Science. 9.30 Lives In A Landscape.

10.00 the world tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Dirt Road. 11.00 Daphne Sounds expensive. 11.30 the Design Dimension. Midnight News And weather. 12.30 Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 12.48 Shipping forecast.

1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.205.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 wake Up to Money.

6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily. 1.00pm Afternoon edition.

4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport.

9.00 5 Live formula 1. 10.00 Phil williams. 1.00am-5.00 Up All Night.

RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.492.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Good Morning Scotland.

9.00 the kaye Adams Programme.

Noon John Beattie. 1.32 the kitchen Cafe. 2.00 Bulletin. 2.05 Janice forsyth. 4.00 Newsdrive. 6.30 Get It on with Bryan Burnett. 9.00 Bulletin.

9.05 Best of the Quay Sessions.

11.00 Bulletin. 11.05 Vic Galloway.

1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

FRIDAY

24 – 30 July

(FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 7.00am Breakfast.

9.00 News. 9.03 Sunday Morning.

Noon Private Passions. 1.02 BBC Proms Chamber Music. 2.00 early Music Show. 3.00 Choral evensong.

4.00 BBC Proms 2016. 6.15 words And Music. 7.30 New Generation Artists. 8.00 BBC Proms 2016. 9.40 Drama on 3. 10.30 early Music Late. 12.30am-6.30 through the Night. RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 Profile.

6.05 Something Understood. 6.35 on Your farm: A Journey through

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.30am the Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Scott Mills. 10.00 Clara Amfo.

12.45pm Newsbeat. 1.00 the Matt edmondson Show. 4.00 the official Chart with Greg James. 5.45 Newsbeat. 6.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Greg James. 7.00 B.traits. 10.00 Pete tong. 1.00am heidi. 4.00-6.00 Radio 1’s essential Mix. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 5.00am Suzi Perry. 6.30 Chris evans.

10.00 ken Bruce. Noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00 Steve wright In the

Afternoon. 5.00 Simon Mayo. 7.00 Desmond Carrington: the Music Goes Round. 8.00 friday Night Is Music Night. 10.00 Sounds of the 80s. Midnight After Midnight. 3.006.00 huey Morgan. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.2-92.4MHz) 6.00am Breakfast.

9.00 essential Classics. Noon Composer of the week: Brahms.

1.00 News. 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. 2.00 Afternoon on 3. 4.30 In tune. 6.00 Composer of the week: Brahms. 7.00 BBC Proms 2016. 9.00 world on 3: womad

2016. 10.15 BBC Proms 2016.

11.45 world on 3: womad 2016.

1.15am-7.00 through the Night.

RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz) 5.30am News. 5.45 farming today.

6.00 today. 9.00 Desert Island Discs. 9.45 (Lw) Daily Service.

9.45 (fM) Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 10.00 woman’s hour. 11.00 Down the Generations. 11.30 Start/Stop.

Noon News. 12.01 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 12.04 (fM) one to one.

12.15 You And Yours. 1.00 the

world At one. 1.45 Shakespeare’s Restless world. 2.00 the Archers.

2.15 Drama: Strangers In the Night. 3.00 Gardeners’ Question time. 3.45 the 29th of July. 4.00 Last word. 4.30 More or Less.

4.55 the Listening Project. 5.00 PM. 5.54 (Lw) Shipping forecast.

6.00 News. 6.30 the Museum of Curiosity. 7.00 the Archers. 7.15 front Row. 7.45 highLites – Natural Bounce. 8.00 Any Questions? 8.50 A Point of View. 9.00 Promises, Promises: A history of Debt. 10.00

the world tonight. 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Dirt Road. 11.00 Late Night woman’s hour. 11.30 A Good Read. 11.55 the Listening Project.

Midnight News. 12.30 Book of the week: Van Gogh’s ear: the true Story. 12.48 Shipping forecast. 1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.20-5.30 Shipping forecast. RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am Morning Reports. 5.15 wake Up to Money.

6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 10.00 5 Live Daily. 1.00pm the friday Sports Panel. 2.00 kermode And

Mayo’s film Review. 4.00 5 Live Drive. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 8.00 5 Live Sport. 10.00 Stephen Nolan.

1.00am-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Good Morning Scotland. 9.00 Stephen Jardine. Noon John Beattie.

1.32 Breaking the News. 2.05 out for the weekend. 4.00 Newsdrive.

6.31 1619 Broadway: the Brill Building. 7.05 Ricky Ross. 9.05 the Jazz house. 11.05 the Music Match.

1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

sAtURDAY

best RADIO of the week

RADIO 1 (FM: 97.6-99.8MHz) 6.00am Dev. 10.00 Jordan North.

1.00pm Alice Levine. 4.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Danny howard. 7.00 MistaJam. 10.00 the Rap Show with Charlie Sloth.

1.00am DJ target. 4.00-6.00 Diplo And friends. RADIO 2 (FM: 88-91MHz) 6.00am Anneka Rice. 8.05 Sounds of the 60s. 10.00 fearne Cotton And Martin kemp. 1.00pm Pick of the Pops. 2.50 world Cup ’66: Minute By Minute. 5.30 Liza tarbuck. 8.00 trevor Nelson’s

Rhythm Nation. 10.00 the Craig Charles house Party. Midnight After Midnight. 3.00-6.00 Bob harris Sunday. RADIO 3 (FM: 90.292.4MHz) 7.00am Breakfast. 9.00 News. 9.03 Summer Record Review.

12.15pm New Generation Artists.

1.00 News. 1.02 Saturday Classics.

3.00 Sound of Cinema. 4.00 Jazz Record Requests. 5.00 Jazz Line-Up. 6.30 the early Music Show. 7.30 BBC Proms 2016. 9.30 world on 3: womad. 1.00am-7.00 through the Night. RADIO 4 (FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz)

5.30am News. 5.45 IPM. 6.00 News.

6.07 open Country. 6.30 farming today this week. 7.00 today. 9.00 Saturday Live. 10.30 (Lw) test Match Special. 10.30 Punt PI. 10.30 (fM) Punt PI. 11.00 tBA. 11.30 from our own Correspondent. Noon News.

12.01 (Lw) Shipping forecast. 12.04 (Lw) test Match Special. 12.04 Your Money And Your Life. 12.04 (fM) Your Money And Your Life. 12.30 the Museum of Curiosity. 1.00 News. 1.10 Any Questions? 2.00 Any Answers? 2.30 the Penny Dreadfuls

Present: the Curse of the Beagle.

3.30 Marc Riley’s Musical time Machine. 4.00 weekend woman’s hour. 5.00 Saturday PM. 5.30 IPM. 5.54 Shipping forecast. 5.57 test Match Special. 5.57 (fM) weather.

6.00 News. 6.15 Loose ends. 6.45 (Lw) Loose ends. 7.00 Profile. 7.15 Saturday Review. 8.00 Archive on 4: Lenny Bruce – his own, Unheard, words. 9.00 Drama: the Last Days of troy. 10.00 News. 10.15 the Moral Maze. 11.00 Counterpoint.

11.30 (Lw) Adrian Mitchell: to

whom It May Concern. 11.30 the echo Chamber. 11.30 (fM) Adrian Mitchell: to whom It May Concern.

Midnight News. 12.30 A Message of Unknown Purpose. 12.48 Shipping forecast. 1.00 As BBC world Service. 5.20-5.30 Shipping forecast.

RADIO 5 (MW: 909/993 kHz) 5.00am 5 Live Science. 6.00 Saturday Breakfast. 9.00 the Danny Baker Show. 11.00 fighting talk. Noon 5 Live Sport. 1.00 5 Live Sport. 2.50 world Cup ’66: Minute By Minute.

5.30 5 Live Sport. 6.00 1966 – 6-0-

6. 7.00 ’66: that was then, this Is Now. 9.00 Stephen Nolan. Midnight 5 Live In Short. 1.00-5.00 Up All Night. RADIO scOtlAND (FM: 92.4-92.7MHz, MW: 810 (Dumfries 585) kHz) 6.00am Bulletin. 6.02 Personal Best. 6.30 out of Doors. 8.00 Good Morning Scotland. 10.00 Shereen.

11.32 Breaking the News. Noon Bulletin. 12.05 off the Ball. 1.59 Sportsound. 5.35 off the Ball. 7.00 Bulletin. 7.05 take the floor. 9.00 Bulletin. 9.05 Pipeline. 10.05 Billy Sloan. 1.00am-6.00 As Radio 5 Live.

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S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

77

Mindy Hammond

Every week in S Magazine

If there was a degree for partying, our columnist and pals would be in a class of their own. School’s out, so bring on the dancing girls... Illustration by Susan Hellard

SuSAN HEllArd c/o ArENA

I

t’s the end of an era in the Hammond household and it’ll be very strange leaving the girls’ old school behind us. Both started there in the nursery class, Izzy at two and a half and Willow at three years old. At the beginning, it was just a couple of half days a week, then as time passed they went through the school. Izzy left a couple of years ago and now it’s Willow’s turn to move on, heralding the emotional end of a 13 year relationship. It’s going to be emotional for all of us.

The kids are all ready to take on the challenge of senior school, but what about the parents? judging by the events of the last week, I think we can unanimously agree – we’re not quite mature enough yet.

It all started with the leavers’ play premiere.

It was a lovely event, with kids and adults alike dressing in black tie and posh frocks. We had a green carpet (it was a play loosely based on robin Hood and Sherwood Forest), there were photos, non-alcoholic champagne, VIP arrivals and, for the adults, a bit of an afterparty. When I say “a bit”, I mean rather a lot. The following day was hard going for some of us, but we knew we’d have a “quiet” get-together for Helsy’s birthday at the weekend. The teenagers were having their post A-level party in a friend’s barn, so why not have a dinner party for the boring parents in the house?

After eating, the men snuck off to the kitchen so the girls decided to put on some tunes and that’s when it started to get silly.

Izzy was not pleased at the sight of her mother and friends dancing like loons beneath Sarah’s multicoloured revolving disco light. She shot me a look of embarrassed horror as she scowled, “I think we should leave.” “yes, in a minute,” I grinned and winked at her mischievously. “oh God, it’s going to be one of those nights,” she sighed and returned to the barn.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016

We loved it. Mamma Mia never sounded so good, although some of Sarah’s easy-listening tracks made us wonder whether she spent every hour away from us in a comfy cardy and slippers, nodding over her knitting in a creaky rocking chair.

Eventually, the far more sensible menfolk reappeared and began the tedious job of separating their sashaying spouses from the rhythm of the night. But when a girl’s gotta dance, a girl’s gotta dance, and these girls were definitely in the mood for dancing. It took a few more songs before we started to disperse and, looking at Izzy’s ever-deepening brow furrows, I decided I should remove myself so left Helsy and Sarah spinning into the dawn.

It was leavers versus parents rounders and cricket the following day, so a rather bleary-eyed Mindy did her best (not very good) mucking-out job possible after four hours’ sleep and almost forgot to load the car with ice, plates, napkins etc for the picnic.

Thankfully, Izzy was on hand to help gather everything and after dropping Iz at her friend’s house, I drove into school to find Willow and her classmates even more tired than the adults after their traditional night walk over the Malvern Hills.

“I’m sooo tired!” she moaned. “We didn’t get to bed till four.” “oh pish! I wasn’t in bed till 3.38am and I was up at half seven. you’ve had eight hours’ sleep – you should be raring to go,” I smirked.

She rolled her eyes and sighed, “Partying parents, was it?” “yep.”

Shaking her head in mild disbelief, she left to get changed for rounders and I joined in with setting up the picnic headquarters.

The girls were very kind to us in the match.

After an unbeaten season, they’re rather good, and purposely missed catching us out, made dramatic misses at stumping posts, and ensured the bowling was slow enough for us to see the ball coming without specs. Even Mrs B, coach extraordinaire, called a no ball each time a batting parent swung and missed, just to give us a less-embarrassing defeat.

We thoroughly enjoyed every moment and were sad to leave our little darlings, who were setting off for a week at camp.

Their last week together. luckily, friendships won’t all be lost despite the children setting off to different schools as a result of their parents enjoying the occasional party and though they may cringe at our dance moves, the kids love their regular parent-driven reunions.

I doubt we’ll ever feel old enough to act our age when the music plays and, as it turns out, that suits our children just fine. life may move on but hopefully they will see that friendships can stay the course, even when the school gates are a distant memory.

79

LLeoori Reid What does this week hold for you?

Libra

JULy 24 – aUg 23 Matt LeBlanc July 25, 1967

With a little extra work, projects you started earlier in the month can be brought to fruition. you’re feeling full of enthusiasm and energy, so sort out your home affairs and get jobs done early in the week. By Wednesday you’ll be aching for unusual adventures and a few thrills and spills.

When the chance to travel comes up, you’re ready to grab it with both hands.

Heading for the sun means you’re heading for happier times. getty images

sePt 24 – OCt 23

this week puts piquancy into a relationship or if you’re single, a chance encounter could prove promising. Watch out for extra expenses – it’s easy to go over budget when you’re having fun.

Pisces

FeB 20 – maRCH 20

Familiar routines are temporarily up in the air, but you’ll benefit long term. a new moneymaking opportunity is coming your way and a relationship reaches an understanding.

For a more in-depth weekly reading, call 0907 181 2961 (07)

What does the month ahead have in store? Call 0907 181 2961 (12)

Scorpio

Aries

%

OCt 24 – NOV 22

it’s time to gather the harvest of your hard work. target Wednesday to make your pitch then on Friday, the spotlight is on friendship. socially, that’s when life comes alive.

%

maRCH 21 – aPRiL 20

as long as you don’t go on a mad spending spree, this is the sort of week that delights you with surprises, pleasing news and unexpected events. it’s all systems go from now on.

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Sagittarius

Taurus

%

NOV 23 – DeC 21

the world looks different this week with its unusual outings, imaginative projects and lucky breaks. you’ll be notching up a fair few miles as you seek out adventures further afield.

%

aPRiL 21 – may 21

Home and family make you happy. But if you make that big decision, by midweek others won’t get the chance to change their minds. get ready to entertain guests and swap memories.

What does your love life have in store?

Call 0907 181 2961 (05)

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Virgo

Capricorn

Gemini

%

%

aUg 24 – sePt 23

if life has been dull, hold on to your hat because all that is about to change. Wednesday’s small windfall perks you up. your confidence blooms and a lively weekend lies ahead.

If you would like a tarot reading, call 0907 181 2961 (06)

% Express Bookshop

We offer a postage-free (UK-only) mail-order service for any book in print and available in the UK, including those mentioned in this issue. Send a cheque/postal order, payable to Express Bookshop, to Express Bookshop, PO Box 200, Falmouth TR11 4WJ, order online at www.expressbookshop.com or call Express Bookshop on 01872 562310.

Lori’s live lines

give old practices and routines the boot and go for a radical overhaul. Whether you’re moving or improving, opportunity is knocking at your door. But if a break is overdue, grab the chance.

may 22 – JUNe 21

invitations, social engagements and gettogethers with friends lead to unexpectedly exciting twists and turns this week. Now strive to reach that personal goal.

If you would like a tarot reading.

0907 181 2961 (10) Call

For a more in-depth weekly reading, call 0907 181 2961 (03)

Aquarius

Cancer

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JaN 21 – FeB 19

meetings, discoveries and brainwaves highlight your week with pleasing and far-ranging results. Love, money and relationships are set to benefit. But don’t delay making decisions.

For a more in-depth weekly reading, call 0907 181 2961 (11)

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JUNe 22 – JULy 23

an ambition moves you into top gear this week.

Unveil a business plan or big idea now before people go off the boil. and remember: the higher you aim, the better you’ll do.

What does the month ahead have in store? Call 0907 181 2961 (04)

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Will you find love this season?

Medium and Clairvoyants is a loved one who has passed over into the spirit world trying to contact you?

Call 0906 150 5814**

DeC 22 – JaN 20

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Tarot Readings my tarot readers “interpret” the energies of the cards and how these affect you.

Call 0906 150 5817**

Love and Romance my team will help you find the answers.

Call 0906 150 5815**

Text a Psychic text SMAGPSYCHIC followed by your questions to 87776** and one of our psychics will send you an answer. (2 x £1.50)***

**Calls cost £1.50 per min plus your telephone company’s network access charge. Calls are recorded for your protection. Maximum call duration 19 minutes. ***Each text message received costs £1.50. You will receive two response messages per question. Total cost £3. Standard operator rates apply for all messages you send. You must be 18 or over. Lines are open from 8am-1am every day, calls made outside of these hours will be charged. Booking line open 9am-5.30pm, Mon-Fri. Available in UK only. Customer service: 0333 202 3392 (9am-5pm). This service is for entertainment only and is regulated by PhonepayPlus. Service Provider: Spoke.

s magaZiNe ★ 24 JULy 2016

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£1,000 Crossword

Post your solution to Competition 16072 Sunday Express General Knowledge (£1,000) Crossword, PO Box 12577, Sutton Coldfield B73 9BS, to arrive by 23:59 on Friday. you can order the Sunday Express Crossword Dictionary 2nd revised edition for £6.99, with free uK postage and packing, from the Express Bookshop (see page 81). Spellings and definitions are taken from the Collins English Dictionary (12th edition out now, price £45), which is also available to order from the Bookshop. For full terms, go to www.express.co.uk/comptc.

Name________________________________________________________________ Address______________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________ Winners will be announced in the Sunday Afternoon section of Sunday’s newspaper in two weeks

Solution for july 17 B I R R O N C C U R E T A I I N

L L S T S M W E C V H E N A T E A P E R L P W S I G K G O E A R K A L D E B U N M I N D O L E U N M E N O R A

82

I K E L L L E C R L O O U D O

E S C H I S A M A T J I U C D C H I T E O R G H K I N C E R T H R A

R H U B A O O E R M I T A Q S O U T H W A A A N I L S H A C N X E O E L T A N T I D O O O N S U E R N A H J S O A D I C T A T E E O S P B E R R

R B R G E A R K E R K S H T E R D E F O O R D Y

WIN

£50 MySTERy WORD BONuS Call 0907 181 2738 for a chance to win £50. Give the answer to 34 Down, leaving your name and address. Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s network access charge and last no longer than two minutes. usual Express rules apply. for full terms go to express.co.uk/ comptc. the winner will be chosen from all correct entries received by 23:59 on Saturday. the editor’s decision is final. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390.

ACROSS

DOWN

1 A small cupboard or recess (6) 5 A group of related sciences including algebra, geometry and calculus (11) 10 Derbyshire town that gave its name to a famous tart and pudding (8) 11 Dizzy _, 20th-century uS jazz trumpeter (9) 12 Shrub with oval serrated leaves and edible rounded brown nuts (5) 14 The capital and largest city of Guinea (7) 16 Affected manners intended to impress others (4) 18 _ lily, southern African plant with a white funnelshaped spathe and a yellow spadix (5) 19 The coil of earth left by an earthworm (4) 20 A variety of peach tree, the fruit of which has a smooth skin (9) 23 A mountain range in southwest Russia, between the Black Sea and the Caspian Sea (8) 24 Tall ornamental towers that form the superstructure of churches, temples etc (8) 25 A powerful circular current or vortex of water (9) 28 In Greek mythology, the god of war; son of Zeus and Hera (4) 29 Another word for the jack playing card (5) 31 The rendered fat from a pig, used in cooking (4) 33 _ Eco, Italian novelist whose works included 1980’s Il Nome Della Rosa (The Name Of The Rose) (7) 35 A reproductive body that is produced by bacteria, fungi, various plants and some protozoans (5) 39 A person who imparts knowledge about a thing, a subject being studied etc (9) 40 _ Bonaparte, French military and political leader of the early 19th century (8) 41 A military position of salute (7,4) 42 Extended areas of land (6)

2 A domesticated South American cud-chewing mammal, used as a beast of burden (5) 3 Device consisting of a container with a mesh or perforated bottom (5) 4 A layer or level (4) 5 A port in southern Sweden, in Scania province (5) 6 Ernst _, German aircraft designer and member of the Nazi party (7) 7 19th-century Irish secret society (5,8) 8 Opera in three acts by Giacomo Puccini, first performed in 1900 (5) 9 The artistic distribution of light and dark masses in a picture (11) 12 Peter _, former MP for Neath who was nominated for a life peerage in 2015 (4) 13 A brittle, bluish-white metallic element used in alloys (4) 15 City in southeast France, on the Mediterranean; a leading resort of the French Riviera (4) 17 labour MP for Manchester Gorton; the current Father of the House (6,7) 19 Irish dish of mashed potatoes and spring onions or leeks (5) 21 The _, 1902 classic piano rag written by Scott joplin (11) 22 A lock of hair (5) 25 A river in northeast England, flowing to the North Sea at Sunderland (4) 26 A state of the central uS, in the Midwest on lake Erie (4) 27 The fleshy lower part of the external ear (4) 30 A republic in southeast Europe, on the Balkan Peninsula (7) 32 The scum formed, usually by oxidation, on the surfaces of molten metals (5) 34 Armoured combat vehicles moving on tracks and armed with guns etc (5) 36 19th-century Bohemian dance with three steps and a hop (5) 37 A place, perch, branch etc, where birds rest or sleep (5) 38 A pointed rod on which meat is skewered and roasted before or over an open fire (4) S MAGAZINE ★ 24 july 2016