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One of the pillars of the Baltimore community was a man named Leo (Moshe Aryeh) Storch, z”l, a philanthropist, attorney and real estate developer who had been among the school’s founders. He and the administrator, Henry Cohn, took charge of the efforts and quickly realized that they needed professional help. Both men were consumed with the day-to-day operations of the school and were already spread thin.

“Against my better judgment, I will sign the contract,” Leo said. “I don’t see any other way.” The fundraising drive would begin with a parlor meeting. The professional team would then organize a campaign, arrange meetings, write letters, make lists, handle the publicity and recruit volunteers to go out collecting. But they

Leo Storch with Rav Moshe Feinstein

themselves wouldn’t solicit any pledges. The team had privately explained to the organizers that potential donors would gauge the size of their donations against whatever amount Leo Storch contributed to the campaign. He wasn’t the wealthiest person on the planet by any stretch of the imagination, but he was known as an exemplary baal chesed. Four or five others would match his pledge, and everyone else would give proportionately. In other words, his response would all but determine the success of the campaign. Leo knew it too. He was familiar with the school’s finances and understood the responsibility of his position. He and his wife, Hannah, did some soulsearching as well as accounting. She was a true eizer kenegdo and supported him unwaveringly in all of his endeavors. When the parlor meeting was about to begin, Leo was ready. The appeal was made, and he immediately stood up. “Because of the dire necessity of the hour, Hannah and I have decided to extend ourselves beyond our means,” he said. “We pledge $2,500.” He sat down to a stunned silence. There was a pause as the others in the room began to revise their expectations. Then the contributions began to roll in. Nobody matched the Storches’ donation

The next morning, Leo and the other administrators met to review the results. The fundraising team had crunched the numbers, and it was clear that they still needed more money Without hesitation, Leo picked up the phone and called his wife. “If this campaign is going to do something, we’re going to need much bigger pledges than what we got last night,” he said. “Can we go up to $5,000? I know it’s a lot of money, but Hashem will take care of us.” Mrs. Storch did not hesitate. Within 24 hours they had another five pledges of $5,000, and their goal was in sight. By the end of the summer, the team had raised $135,000 (equivalent to $1.3 million today) to restore the building and purchase a new property. Today, as Leo Storch’s 50th yahrtzeit approaches on 19 Shvat, the Bais Yaakov of Baltimore is a thriving mosad chinuch for over 1,500 students, with multiple campuses for its elementary, middle and high schools. Not every member of the community knows about its humbl beginnings, and the sacrifice and adversity that were endured along the way. But those who do recognize their tremendous debt of gratitude to a man who was oseik b’tzorchei tzibbur be’emunah, standing up and leading the way in a time of need. This article was written by Rabbi Yoel Gold in Aha! Moments in the January 19, 2022, issue of Ami Magazine commemorating the 50th yahrtzeit of M. Leo Storch, a”h. Reprinted with permission from Ami Magazine.

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But hiring a fundraiser required money—money that the school didn’t have. If the campaign was successful the fee would not be an issue, but that “if ” hung over their heads like a dark cloud. They looked into agencies, narrowed down the options and interviewed candidates, finally meeting in the home of a board member. The school would have to invest $6,000 with a goal of raising $100,000, and it was very late when they finally reached a decision.

that night, but there were pledges of $1,500 and $1,000. Others who were less well-off made smaller pledges but agreed to donate their time and energy towards the growth and rebuilding of the school. The campaign had begun on a strong and promising foot.

JANUARY 27, 2022

In June of 1955, on the night before graduation, the Bais Yaakov of Baltimore was destroyed by a fire. Some sections of the building were completely gutted, and the rest of it was heavily damaged by smoke. In the 13 years since it had opened with two students, the school had been growing rapidly, and there were hopes of adding a high school. The fire, with its devastating impact, set it back by many years. With no professional fundraisers on staff, the school suddenly needed to launch an emergency building campaign.

sacrifice to rebuild

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Fiery Faith

LEO STORCH’S

CONTENTS COMMUNITY Dear Editor . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6

JANUARY 27, 2022

Around the Community . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8 Community Calendar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

JEWISH THOUGHT

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Rabbi Zvi Teichman. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32

PEOPLE 613 Seconds . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT Centerfold. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56 Notable Quotes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58

LIFESTYLES My Israel Home. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40 Parenting Pearls. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 42 NEW

Teen Talk. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48 Common Cents. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 Mental Health Corner. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54

Dear Readers, This past week the Baltimore community was graced with the presence of the Viznitzer Rebbe of Montreal. It was an opportunity for the community to experience a Shabbos in full Chassidish form. Over 150 Chassidim travelled to Baltimore from mostly Montreal and Monsey to accompany the Rebbe and were graciously hosted by families in the greater Greenspring neighborhoods. For a couple of days the Ranchleigh neighborhood was transformed into a mini Boro Park. Flocks of Chassidim walked the streets wearing their “shtreimelach,” creating a beautiful scene rarely experienced in our neck of the woods. The base for this Shabbos was Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah (Rabbi Eichenstein’s shul) where traditional “parenchas” (AKA bleachers) were constructed on both sides of the Bais Medrash. Chassidim and Baltimoreans alike stood on the parenchas flanking the regular seats in the shul for davening and for multiple “tishim.” There was a palpable buzz during the events of Shabbos hearing the fervent pitch of the tefillos and zemiros. It was hard not to leave Shabbos without feeling inspired with a renewed respect and appreciation of our brothers. The Viznitzer Rebbe of Montreal was a worthy beneficiary of the large crowd that gathered to spend Shabbos with him. He’s a scion of the previous Viznitz Rebbe of Monsey, the Toras Mordechai, and is one of eight Rebbes (along with his brothers) who carry on the lineage; each one carrying this prestigious mantle in cities throughout the world. For those who had the opportunity to see him, there’s an obvious air of royalty that is evident in his company. The Rebbe has the presence of a king with a warm smile that connects and puts people at ease, easily connecting to those who seek a bracha or his guidance. While the Viznitzer Rebbe’s stay in our city was relatively short, the impression he left on the city will certainly have a lasting impact. Aaron Menachem

Dating Dialogue. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62 Your Money. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 70

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NEWS Israel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18 That’s Odd. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

Send your news to BJH! Send us your: community events, articles & photos, and mazal tovs to editor@baltimorejewishhome.com to be featured in coming editions!

The Baltimore Jewish Home is an independent bi-weekly newspaper. All opinions expressed by the journalists, contributors and/or advertisers printed and/or quoted herein are solely their opinions and do not reflect the opinions of BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME, their parent company or affiliates, and may have been previously disseminated by them on television, radio, Internet or another medium. The Baltimore Jewish Home is not responsible for typographical errors, or for the kashrus of any product or business advertised within. The BJH contains words of Torah. Please treat accordingly.

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Dear Editor, I am writing to share a lifesaving situation thanks to a device that everyone should know about and have! My husband, Arnold Begleiter, was diagnosed with an underlying condition in April , 2021. Because he is immune suppressed and has a life threatening condition, I have been very nervous about him possibly getting Covid. Arnold was vaccinated, boosted and had a flu shot. On Monday, January 10, 2022, through a home Covid test he tested positive. His doctor immediately made arrangements for him to receive monoclonal antibodies that night. I was also given the antibodies prophylactically because of the probability that I was exposed to him and I could possibly test positive. His oxygen saturation was at 90% at the time of getting his antibodies, but upon awakening Tuesday morning I checked his oxygen level and it had dropped to 87% and thanks to the pulse oximeter that I used to check his oxygen level it revealed an unsafe level and reading in his oxygen saturation. Without the pulse oximeter to check his ox-

ygen level, I would NOT HAVE KNOW THAT HIS OXYGEN LEVEL WAS DROPPING. Many thanks to Hatzalah for arriving so quickly. When they monitored his oxygen level with their monitor his oxygen level had dropped even more to 82% and he was taken to the hospital immediately for lifesaving intervention. Diagnosed with Covid pneumonia. bacterial pneumonia and heart failure, he was placed on a regimen of drugs, IV’s, oxygen and telemetry. IF I DIDN’T HAVE A PULSE OXIMETER TO CHECK HIS OXYGEN LEVEL, THE OUTCOME COULD HAVE BEEN VERY DIFFERENT. Thanks to Hashem and quick intervention, Arnold was discharged from the hospital 5 days later. The pulse oximeter is extremely important and an inexpensive device to have to monitor oxygen levels, heart rate, and respirations, for saving a life! Mary Begleiter,R.N., B.S., M.S. (wife of Arnold Begleiter)

Dear Editor, As an avid reader of Baltimore Jewish Home, I wish to comment on a regular feature, Mental Health Corner, by Rabbi Azriel Hauptman. For some time, now, I have found myself drawn to each bi-weekly article, regardless of the subject matter. I can recall reading such topics as: Sleep patterns/dreams, Empathy, Overdependence on therapy, Hypnotherapy and others. Until very recently, I never wondered why this column resonates so strongly with me. After all, I am not the type of person who requires therapy on any regular basis. By now, I understand. Each of the topics is intended for general audiences with the goal of providing strong, relevant educational guidance. Doesn’t it make sense? Everyone appreciates the importance of attending to ones physical health. Ones state of mental & emotional health should be of no less importance. Truly, each of these essays is very carefully crafted & delivers a big emotional boost. In addition to the referral and support functions that Relief Resource provides, the educational function herein presented serves a vital purpose which can only benefit all of us, individually and collectively. This is especially critical nowadays as we all acknowledge that whatever issues are “out there” impact frum, Jewish communities, as well, in full measure. For a wealth of additional information please visit Relief Resources’ web site. Howard Elling

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Around the Community

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Celebrates Special Event Honoring Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose By: BJLife/Beth Adler

nai Jacob Shaarei Zion was filled with almost 300 people celebrating the installation of Rabbi Daniel and Yocheved Rose as Rav and Rebbetzin of BJSZ. Although the installation had been delayed because of Covid, Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose have been leading our shul for the last 18 months, rising to the challenge of assuming the leadership during the pandemic with exceptional warmth and caring. The evening of appreciation began with a reception during which people lined up to personally thank Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose for the influence

that they have on their lives. The evening then continued with a dinner, at which the guests were continuously entertained by the wit of the MC, the renowned Shimon Marciano. The program included a dynamic and stirring performance by the well-known performer, Yehuda Green, as well as a beautiful video tribute to Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose. A highlight of the evening was when Rabbi Moshe Hauer, the Rabbi Emeritus of our shul, delivered inspired and meaningful remarks prior to the presentation of the Ksav HaRabbanus to Rabbi Rose by Rabbi Hauer and Rabbi Yaakov Hopfer, president of the Vaad HaRabbanim. The program culminated with

heartfelt remarks and a Siyum HaShas by Rabbi Rose, after which all those in attendance broke out with spirited dancing by the kehilla with Rabbi Rose. The crowd seemed to want to dance all night. Every speaker noted that Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose are building on the foundation established by the beloved Rabbi and Rebbetzin Hauer, who made BJSZ into a shul which serves not only its members, but also the broader Jewish community, with Torah and Tefilah every day, all day. The Roses exude warmth, simcha, and grace. All these qualities were on display Motzei Shabbos. The theme of the special event was

“Blossoming a New Era,” heralding the energy and creativity that Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose have brought to the shul’s youth and family programming and demonstrating our focus on building a strong future for BJSZ and the broader Baltimore community. The special event for Rabbi and Rebbetzin Rose concluded an unforgettable, special Shabbos at BJSZ during which Yehuda Green led the tefillos with passion and inspired song. It was a Shabbos and a special event to remember, in classic BJSZ style. If you have not experienced it, we invite you to come join us at BJSZ and see what we are all about!

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JANUARY 27, 2022

Bais Hamedrash and Mesivta Middle School Chavrusa Program

ach Tuesday evening more than seventy-five 6th, 7th and 8th grade boys from the community converge on the Bais Hamedrash and Mesivta of Baltimore for it’s popular chavrusa learning program. Now in its 19th year, the program pairs middle school students and Mesivta talmidim to learn together each week. Following the learning session, refreshments are served. “We are thrilled with the level of participation from the community,” says Rabbi Ari Soloff, Director of Development. “This is a wonderful opportunity for our Talmidim to serve as role models and mentors, and it provides the attendees with their first taste of the Mesivta experience.” For more info contact the yeshiva at 410-486-0006 or at office@bhmb. edu.

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JANUARY 27, 2022

OCA Students Celebrate Tu B’Shevat and Honor Martin Luther King, Jr. with a Day of Service

CA students connected to the community with special Tu B’Shevat programming and a day of service in honor of MLK Jr. Day. Students enjoyed a delicious Tu B’Shevat Seder and got a sneak peek at this year’s Brachot Campaign! Students also learned about MLK Jr., his life, and his teachings. MLK Day has become a National Day of Service that transforms Dr. King’s life and teachings into community action for volunteers of all ages. OCA students prepared hakarat hatov packages for police officers, Hatzalah members, firefighters, hospital personnel, and postal workers. It was a great day of learning, connecting, and community building.

Viznitz Rebbe of Montreal visits Baltimore

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his past week, the Viznitz Rebbe of Montreal spent Shabbos in Baltimore. The Rebbe visited many community Rabbonim as well as local Yeshivos and local day schools. Shabbos was spent in Ranchleigh where the Rebbe presided over Tefillos and Tishim that took place at Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah. Over 150 of his Chasidim joined him in Baltimore.

Photo Credits: Eli Klein and Yirmi Weberman

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Around the Community

he excitement for learning and connection to family and friends continued at Torah Institute of Baltimore with their third annual Grandfather, Father, and Son Melava Malka. On Motza’ei Shabbos, Parshas Yisro, TI’s 5th and 6th graders enjoyed a special learning seder with their fathers and grandfathers followed by a Melava Malka with live music and a special game. The event, which was held at Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion, started with energetic learning as the talmidim, fathers, and grandfathers filled the main shul to capacity. The crowd then moved into the social hall for a Melava Malka coordinated by Details by Dena and catered by the Knish Shop. Participants were met by beautifully set tables and a slide-show of photos of the boys “through the years” as they entered the hall, setting a mood of nachas and nostalgia. Dr. Elie Portnoy, event coordinator, opened the seudah with remarks that highlighted the boys’ commitment to Limud HaTorah and menchlichkeit. Rabbi Shimon Hirsch, Menahel, sha-

red divrei bracha and thanked the entire crowd for helping to create a flourishing Cheder. After a heartwarming video presentation, Dr. Dani Sova led the attendees in a trivia game, which brought excitement to the room. Dr. Sova then surprised the boys with an exciting save the date video for the upcoming TI Siyum Hadoros to be held on March 13th. Dr. Dovid Daniel captivated the boys as he drew the winning tickets for the raffles. The boys then received special pekalach with candy and a set of kugelach to take home. In school, the boys are talking about how much they enjoyed the evening, days after the event ended. The hallways are full of happy boys play-

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What caused you to enter the field of milah? Milah has been in my family for generations, as many of my relatives have been successful, sought-after mohelim. I have found that this field fits me like a glove, as I am someone who strives for perfection. And the fact that I am very adept with my hands doesn’t hurt, either (no pun intended!). The more that I learn about the significance of this very special mitzvah, the more thankful, humbled, and excited I become to have the opportunity to perform it. As a mohel I have had the opportu-

nity to study hematology, the science and behavior of the blood, as well as learning about other complex organs. Through learning milah I never cease to be amazed by the inner workings and perfection of the human body. Finally, I have always been fascinated by the story of Eliahu Hanavi and this mitzvah which is associated with him has always interested me. Tell us about your experience in the field of milah. I have had the opportunity to study under a number of seasoned mohelim for close to 3 years. Amongst them are R’ Eliahu Tendler, an uncle of mine who was the primary mohel in Columbus, Ohio for a number of years, and Harav Yosef Berger to whom I turn for halachic guidance. In addition, I have traveled to Europe to perform circumcisions under the guidance of expert mohel R’ Josovic., where I had the opportunity to perform 68 circumcisions under his guidance, in addition to the bris of my own son. Impressed with my work, R’ Josovic granted me semicha (certification). Many mohelim and medical professionals have viewed my work and endorse my skills. Readers can contact me for references. What are you offering that is unique? I am very gentle and sensitive to the needs of my patients, ensuring that

every baby receives the highest level of care possible. I make every effort to minimize discomfort to the baby while still remaining within the parameters of halacha. To that end, I take extra steps such as soaking bandages with novocaine and other techniques to reduce pain. My experience has granted me professionalism and confidence in my work. I am there for the parents at all times: before, during, and after the procedure, and make myself available by phone to discuss anything from possible concerns to an in-depth explanation of bris milah. In order to add meaning to their son’s bris, I often study the classic sources of this very special mitzvah with parents. In addition, should par-

ents ask me to, I am very happy to share a thought about milah before the actual procedure. Is there anything else that you would like to share with our readers? As a communal service, I am delighted to answer any questions that parents of the community may have regarding milah, whether they are clients of mine or not. I can be contacted at 443 360 1900. Additionally, I can travel almost anywhere to perform this very special mitzvah. Thank you for your interest. I look forward to sharing simchas with the greater Baltimore community and beyond!

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Please tell our readers a little bit about yourself. I was born in Yerushalayim and was raised here in Baltimore, where I have deep roots. In fact, I am a 6th generation Baltimorian! Some of your readers may know my grandparents, Rabbi George and Brenda Strum. My mother’s parents were Rav Yoseph and Esther Tendler, the menahel of Ner Israel’s Mechinah for 48 years and the nurse for Bais Yaakov elementary for many years, respectively. My father is a rebbe in R’ Shlangers yeshivah and my mother is a shadchan for the Shidduch Center of Baltimore. I currently learn full-time at Ner Israel’s Kollel Avodas Levy, as well as give a weekly shiur at Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim.

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The Week In News

Saturday night. Less than a day later, on Sunday afternoon, a second quake shook the same region, this one measuring 3.6. According to the Euro-Mediterranean Seismological Center (EMSC), the quakes measured 4.1 and 3.9, respectively. The quakes were felt both in Israel and Jordan. Jordan felt at least 10 aftershocks.

Earthquakes Shake the Holy Land

Compensation for Meron Tragedy

Two earthquakes shook northern Israel on Saturday and Sunday. The first quake, which, according to the Geological Survey of Israel, measured 3.8, had its epicenter under the Jordan River, just south of the Kinneret (Sea of Galilee). It occurred late

Israel’s government ministers on Thursday agreed to provide 500,000 NIS ($160,000) in initial aid to each of the families of the 45 people who died in the Meron disaster last year. The proposal still requires government approval. In a statement, Finance Minister Avigdor Liberman (Yisrael Beytenu) and Justice Minister Gideon Sa’ar (New Hope) said, “The pain cannot be

eliminated, but we will do everything in our capabilities to provide the maximum response for the families and we will take all precautions to prevent the next disaster.

“The tremendous loss experienced by the 45 families in Israel and the Jewish Diaspora cannot be compensated for. The least the government can do is make sure that a case like this doesn’t happen again and to economically assist the families that were harmed.” Liberman added, “The catastrophe that happened at Meron is of a national magnitude and the feeling of deep loss and pain are experienced first and foremost by the families and, with them, the State of Israel. The financial assis-

tance plan we’ve put together is necessary and important.”

Deri Resigns from Knesset MK Aryeh Deri, who chairs the Knesset’s Shas party, submitted his resignation to Knesset Speaker Mickey Levy (Yesh Atid) on Sunday morning. The resignation took effect within 48 hours. Despite his resignation, however, Deri will maintain leadership of the Shas party.

Under the plea deal, Deri pleaded guilty to minor tax offenses and will pay a fine of 180,000 NIS

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The Week In News ($56,541.91). Though he resigns from the current Knesset, Deri will not be required to serve jail time and will be allowed to run in the upcoming elections. In addition, the issue of moral turpitude will not be pursued. In 1999, Deri was convicted for bribery, fraud, and breach of trust, and served three years in prison. He returned to the Knesset in 2012.

Bibi: I Won’t Sign Plea Bargain Former Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu on Monday evening responded for the first time to reports that he might sign a plea bargain.

Turning to the Israeli public, Net-

anyahu said, “Dear and beloved citizens of Israel, in recent days you have proven once again that I do not walk alone and that millions of you walk with me. You moved me greatly. I will continue to lead the Likud and the national camp to lead the State of Israel – on your behalf. “The entire public sees what is happening in court and how the investigation against me was conducted. It is enough to close the cases against me right now, but it has not happened yet. In recent days, false allegations have been made in the media about things I allegedly agreed to, such as the claim I agreed to admit to moral turpitude. This is not correct.” He added, “Your mobilization and tremendous support has warmed my heart and the hearts of my family members, and it gives me more strength to continue to lead you and fight for our path, truth and justice.” Had Netanyahu agreed to admit to moral turpitude, he would be forced to resign from the Knesset and barred from running in elections for seven years.

UN Adopts Holocaust Resolution

The United Nations (UN) General Assembly on Thursday adopted an Israeli resolution to combat Holocaust denial, making it the second time that an Israeli resolution managed to pass. The resolution uses the International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance (IHRA) working definition of Holocaust denial and provides expectations for actions that signatories agree to take in order to address the phenomenon. It also demands social media networks remove posts which

fall under the IHRA definition. The resolution passed with 114 in favor. Only Iran directly opposed. Introducing the resolution, Israeli Ambassador to the United Nations Gilad Erdan said, “Holocaust denial has spread like a cancer. It has spread under our watch. It has spread because people have chosen to be irresponsible and to avoid accountability.” He added, “As the number of Holocaust survivors diminishes, Holocaust denial is growing at a terrifying speed. “As the number of survivors dwindles, the younger generations are being indoctrinated on social media to doubt reality and trust deception.” The resolution, which was introduced and passed on the 80th anniversary of the Wannsee Conference organized by the Nazis to coordinate the implementation of Hitler’s Final Solution, has no enforcement mechanism. But Erdan hopes that it will set an “international standard” for what constitutes Holocaust denial and how social media companies are expected to respond.

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The Week In News

JANUARY 27, 2022

Justice Naor Dies

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rael’s history, including striking down legislation that sought to delay drafting ultra-Orthodox Jews into the army; barring the state from deporting African migrants against their will; allowing mini-markets in Tel Aviv to operate on Shabbat; and forcing the government to recognize private conversions to Judaism for the sake of citizenship. “I will remember Miriam Naor as someone who insisted on demolishing homes in [the West Bank settlements and outposts of] Ofra and Amona and Netiv Ha’avot,” MK Bezalel Smotrich told Radio Galey Yisrael after Naor died. He also criticized her decision to refuse to send a judicial representative to a state ceremony in 2017 marking 50 years of the settlement enterprise. “In short, just another [Supreme Court] president in a long line of those…who destroyed a once glorious institution,” Smotrich added, saying: “It’s hard for me to be hypocritical.”

China is Israel’s Biggest Importer China became Israel’s largest source of imports in 2021, surpassing the United States, according to data released by Israel’s National Bureau of Statistics on Thursday. Last year, Israel imported $10.7 billion in goods from China, compared with $7.7 billion in 2020, a nearly 40% increase.

Israel’s imports from the United States, previously its largest import source, totaled $8.2 billion, a slight increase from 2020. The United States remained Israel’s largest ex-

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Hundreds of mourners gathered to pay their last respects to former Supreme Court chief justice Miriam Naor as she was laid to rest on Tuesday after dying earlier this week at the age of 74. Prime Minister Naftali Bennett began his eulogy, “Words of the wise, spoken quietly, should be heard.”

of our time.” President Isaac Herzog said, “A little over four years ago, when she left the Supreme Court, Miriam said the following: ‘Even today, as the decades have passed and I have served in all the courts, I am grateful that my path led me to being a judge.’ “Now that we say goodbye to you prematurely, we can fully say that you have fulfilled your role to the end, spreading light into the distance. You will be remembered by the future generations of Israel as the queen of justice.” Naor, who was appointed to the Supreme Court in 2003, served as head of the court from 2015 to 2017, when she retired. In recent months, Naor was serving as head of the state commission of inquiry into last year’s Meron disaster, during which 45 people were killed in a crush at a religious festival, in the worst civilian disaster in Israel’s history. During her 14-tenure on the Supreme Court, Naor oversaw some of the most significant cases in Is-

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The Week In News port destination. Israel’s largest trade deficit was also with China, totaling $6.6 billion. The new data comes shortly after Israel vowed to keep the Biden administration in the loop on any major trade deals with China, in an effort to avoid further tensions. Both the Biden and the Trump administrations have expressed concerns about the warming relationship between Israel and China as the latter’s ties with Europe and the United States have soured.

Defeat the Mandate March Several thousand people marched in Washington, DC, on Sunday against vaccine mandates. They called for “freedom” against the “tyranny”

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of forcing Americans to procure the Covid-19 vaccine. A number of major U.S. cities including D.C., New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, Minneapolis, and Boston have implemented citywide rules requiring residents to show proof of vaccination at certain establishments, such as restaurants and gyms. The peaceful protest started around noon at the Washington Monument and headed first to the Lincoln Memorial, where it remained while a series of speakers took to the steps to share their experiences of the past year and their reasons to call for an end to the vaccine mandates. “Mandates and freedoms don’t mix, like oil and water,” one speaker said. “Breathe. Inhale G-d, exhale fear,” another said. Between 30,000 and 35,000 people attended the protest, demanding an end to vaccine mandates and passports and a call for reasonable debate and the power of informed consent. “You’re going to hear a lot of people talk about on the left say this is a big, anti-vax rally – it’s people coming

in to deny science,” march organizer Will Witt, an author and political commentator for nonprofit PragerU, said last week before the rally. “But this march is about the mandate, and this march is about the Draconian measures that we’re seeing all across this country right now, especially in places like D.C., New York City, Los Angeles, San Francisco.”

Sheldon Silver Dies at 77

Former New York Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver died in federal custody this week at the age of 77. An Orthodox Jew and Democrat who represented New York’s Lower East Side, Silver died at a hospital

near Otisville Correctional Facility in upstate New York, where he had been serving a 6 1/2-year sentence on federal corruption charges. He had been treated for cancer and recently had back surgery at a federal prison hospital in Massachusetts. Silver had been serving time for using his clout in state government to benefit real estate developers, who rewarded Silver by referring lucrative business to his law firm. Silver’s 2015 arrest and conviction sent shockwaves through New York’s Jewish establishment, where he was well-known and generally highly regarded. Silver received an honorary degree from Yeshiva University, where he obtained his bachelor’s degree in 1965. Silver first won a seat representing Manhattan’s Lower East Side in 1976. He became Assembly speaker in 1994, a powerful position that made him one of Albany’s “three men in a room” negotiating annual budgets and major legislation with the governor and state Senate leader. He was known to observe Sabbath even during the marathon negotiation sessions that

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The Week In News preceded annual budget deadlines and the end of legislative sessions. In all, Silver served as speaker during the tenure of five New York governors, from Mario Cuomo to Andrew Cuomo. “For more than two decades, he held back a tide of repressive legislation while advancing an agenda that provided equity, justice and opportunity for all,” Democratic Assembly member Kevin Cahill of the Hudson Valley said in a statement. Silver gave up his leadership position following his arrest in January 2015 and lost his legislative seat upon his first conviction that November. Silver was furloughed from prison for several days in May before federal authorities denied him home confinement.

Changes to the SAT

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The College Board on Tuesday announced a slew of new changes to its SAT college admissions exam. As of November, the test will be given completely online.

“The digital SAT will be easier to take, easier to give, and more relevant,” said Priscilla Rodriguez, vice president of College Readiness Assessments at the College Board. “We’re not simply putting the current SAT on a digital platform –we’re taking full advantage of what delivering an assessment digitally makes possible. With input from educators and students, we are adapting to ensure we continue to meet their evolving needs.” Additionally, the new test will take two hours to complete instead of three. Students can use calculators for the entire Math portion. Previous versions prohibited calculators in some sections. The passages featured in the Reading section will be shorter and will include only one question each. They will more closely resemble works that students are taught in their classrooms. In another change, scores will be made available to students and their teachers in days instead of weeks. The new digital-only version of the SAT will begin being distributed internationally in 2023, with U.S. distribution beginning in 2024.

Sinema Censured

The Arizona Democratic Party’s executive board on Saturday announced that it would formally censure Arizona Democratic Sen. Kyrsten Sinema for voting to maintain filibuster rules. Sinema and West Virginia’s Senator Joe Manchin were the only two Democrats to join Republicans in upholding the Senate’s 60-vote threshold to overcome a filibuster on legislation. The other Democrats had attempted to change Senate rules to allow legislation to pass with 51 votes. In a statement, Arizona Democratic Party Chair Raquel Terán said, “While we take no pleasure in this announcement, the ADP Executive Board has decided to formally censure Senator Sinema as a result of her failure to do whatever it takes to ensure

the health of our democracy.” She added, “I want to be clear: the Arizona Democratic Party is a diverse coalition with plenty of room for policy disagreements, however, on the matter of the filibuster and the urgency to protect voting rights, we have been crystal clear. In the choice between an archaic legislative norm and protecting Arizonans’ right to vote, we choose the latter, and we always will.” Sinema’s spokesperson Hannah Hurley responded, “During three terms in the U.S. House, and now in the Senate, Kyrsten has always promised Arizonans she would be an independent voice for the state – not for either political party. She’s delivered for Arizonans and has always been honest about where she stands.”

Judge: NYS Mask Mandate Not Legal On Monday, New York State Supreme Court Judge Thomas Rademaker ruled that the state’s mask mandate cannot be enforced, noting

to be inspired..

MEET

Kaitlyn

Kaitlyn started attending Rabbi Flamm’s Judaism classes, and eventually traveled to Israel on a Birthright trip that he led. That trip solidified her sense of Jewish identity and her interest in the Jewish people’s connection to the land of Israel.

Jeremy JEREMY DOCK MOVED TO BALTIMORE IN JULY 2020 FOR HIS ORTHODONTIC RESIDENCY. He knew he would grow professionally, but thanks to Etz Chaim, he has grown Jewishly, too.

A Cincinnati native, Jeremy was always involved in Jewish life. He grew up attending synagogue, participated in a Jewish youth group, and joined a Jewish fraternity in college. Until recently, however, he had never really connected with Judaism’s spiritual side. Shortly after Jeremy arrived in Baltimore, a friend from his fraternity introduced him to Chana Grove over Zoom. After speaking with Chana, Jeremy got involved in Etz Chaim’s JCare program for young professionals. “JCare introduced me to parts of Judaism that I had not previously explored,” Jeremy says. “I had never realized how beautiful Judaism is.” Jeremy traveled to Israel in August as part of his JCare fellowship. One of the lucky few who were able to travel to the country during the pandemic, Jeremy found the experience deeply meaningful. Although he contracted COVID-19 on his trip and had to extend his stay in quarantine, he says he wouldn’t change a thing. Jeremy looks forward to resuming JCare programming in person and seeing the friends he has made. He is also excited about

MEET

Randi Abramson “WARMTH, FRIENDSHIP, AND A SENSE OF COMMUNITY.” ACCORDING TO RANDI ABRAMSON, THAT’S WHAT ETZ CHAIM GAVE TO HER AND HER FAMILY.

Randi grew up in Baltimore in a modern Orthodox family. She attended day school at Beth Tfiloh, as do her 13-year-old daughter and 14-year-old son. Randi’s first experience with Etz Chaim was on a Momentum trip to Israel that Elana Pomeranz led in winter 2019. While Randi had been to Israel before, Momentum—which brings Jewish moms and dads to Israel for eight transformative days of learning and community-building—was different. Randi was amazed by how quickly she bonded with the other moms in such a short amount of time. “All the walls came down,” she says. Praying and experiencing Shabbat with her group made her think about what kind of person and parent she wanted to be. After returning to Baltimore, the Momentum group committed to meeting every month. It’s been two years, and they still gather—in person or on Zoom—to continue learning from Elana and one another. “Elana always makes us feel like equals,” says Randi. “She gives a modern spin to traditional messages.” Randi and her family are grateful for everything they have found in the Etz Chaim community.

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After graduating from Towson in 2020, Kaitlyn stayed in the Baltimore area, beginning a graduate program in industrial organizational psychology at the University of Baltimore. Together with Sivan and another friend from her Towson days, she joined JCare and started learning over Zoom with Chana Grove. “Chana always has answers to my questions,” says Kaitlyn. In 2021, Kaitlyn traveled to Israel with JCare. She loved the connections that developed among her small group and found the experience to be profoundly meaningful and emotional. More than ever before, Kaitlyn wanted to deepen her Jewish experience with Etz Chaim and continue her journey of learning. Since the trip, Kaitlyn has been attending a biweekly women’s learning evening and participating

MEET

sharing the joys of Judaism with everyone around him. “Etz Chaim is truly a tree of life,” he says. “It laid the foundations for everything I have experienced.”

JANUARY 27, 2022

GROWING UP IN LIVINGSTON, NEW JERSEY, KAITLYN KNEW HER MOM WAS JEWISH. However, Kaitlyn didn’t identify as Jewish herself or know much about Jewish traditions until 2016, when she started at Towson University and met her proudly Jewish roommate, Sivan. Sivan was a regular at Rabbi Efy Flamm’s famous Shabbat dinners, and urged Kaitlyn to join her. When Kaitlyn finally tagged along one Friday night during her sophomore year, it was the start of a Jewish journey that continues to this day.

in Shabbat dinners (in addition to her JCare meetings, of course). “Thanks to Etz Chaim, I know I’m not alone,” Kaitlyn says. “Judaism has made me a better person.”

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that the Department of Health didn’t have the legal authority to do so. The Mineola judge added that it is up to the state Legislature to decide. In response, Rep. Elise Stefanik (R-N.Y.) and Rep. Lee Zeldin (R-N.Y.) hailed the ruling, which essentially scrapped the order reinstituted by Gov. Kathy Hochul amid concerns about a winter surge of COVID-19 cases. The mandate, which remains in effect until February 1, covers businesses and venues and schools, public transit, homeless shelters, correctional facilities, nursing homes, and health care settings. Nassau County Executive Bruce Blakeman recently signed an executive order earlier in January telling local school boards to vote on the mandate, instead of blindly enforcing it in area schools. New York Republican Rep. Stefanik, the influential No. 3 GOP leader in the House of Representatives, slammed Hochul and called the ruling a “win for small businesses, parents, students, and the freedom of all New Yorkers.” “(The) authoritarian mandates were crushing New York small businesses that already have faced unprecedented challenges throughout the COVID-19 pandemic,” she said in a statement. The decision will now go to an appeals court and from there to the state Court of Appeals, which is the highest court in New York state. Gov. Hochul vowed to fight the

ruling and pursue all options to reverse the legal decision. “My responsibility as governor is to protect New Yorkers throughout this public health crisis, and these measures help prevent the spread of COVID-19 and save lives,” she said. Zeldin, who is running for governor, accused Hochul of being on a “power trip.” “Hey Kathy, Masks are OPTIONAL!” Zeldin tweeted. The state plans to appeal the decision. The mandate will remain in force until higher courts rule.

2M Migrants Caught on Southern Border A record nearly two million migrants have been apprehended attempting to illegally enter the U.S. from Mexico in 2021. Of those, 178,840 of them were apprehended during the month of December 2021, official figures showed. The number of migrants arriving in the U.S. dropped during the start of the COVID-19 pandemic but picked up later in 2020. It then jumped again following U.S. President Joe Biden’s entry into office. Though the summer months usually mark a drop in the number of attempts to cross the border, approximately 200,000 attempted to illegally

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The Week In News cross from Mexico into the U.S. over the course of July 2021, the U.S. Department of Homeland Security said. The arrivals pose a challenge to U.S. authorities, especially since the current administration has promised not to send unaccompanied minors back to Mexico.

Donation Doughnuts

In an effort to encourage Americans to donate blood, Krispy Kreme doughnuts announced that it would be giving away free pastries to those who

donate the life-saving liquid. This week, the chain will give away a dozen original glazed doughnuts to people who donated blood to the American Red Cross. The promotion comes after the organization recently announced that it’s dealing with the worst blood shortage in over a decade, with the organization seeing a 10% decrease in donations since the start of the pandemic in March 2020. To receive the free dozen, customers have to order in-person at a Krispy Kreme shop and show their donation sticker or confirmation of their donation on the Red Cross blood donor app. Donating to other blood donation organizations besides the Red Cross will also qualify for the free dozen of doughnuts. This is not the first time Krispy Kreme used its doughnuts as an incentive for Americans. Last March, the chain began its giveaway to encourage people to get vaccinated with a free doughnut a day. It gave away nearly 4 million doughnuts in its effort. Sounds like you can have your cake and eat it, too.

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Fake burgers beware. There is a new vegan sandwich in town. Finnebrogue Artisan, a U.K. meat producer in Northern Ireland, broke the world record for the largest vegan burger in November. The company, which also sells vegan and vegetarian products, used its “Naked Evolution Burger” recipe for its world record. According to the press release, the world’s largest burger is the equivalent of 1,274 regular-sized “Naked Evolution Burgers.” Meat-eaters take note. According to Guinness World Records, all the ingredients of the 358.3-pound burger were verified as vegan. But this was no ordinary burger. The toppings on the fake burger included 22 pounds of tomatoes, 10

pounds of lettuce, 15.4 pounds of cheese, 4.4 pounds of tobacco onions, 11 pounds of pickles, 11 pounds of vegan bacon slices, and 11 pounds of “Naked Burger” sauce. It took Finnebrogue Artisan almost nine hours to cook the burger patty. The vegan bun was provided by a local bakery. “We were set a target weight of 100kg (220 pounds), but we knew from the outset we wanted to exceed that,” Sean Kearney, Finnebrogue Artisan’s innovation process manager, shared. “The team included representatives from NPD, marketing, and engineering; and together we designed and built everything, including a swing to aid [in] turning the patty during cooking. That was perhaps the most challenging part of the record as we didn’t want to break the patty.” After recording the feat, the company distributed the giant sandwich to the homeless. No word on if they added fries on the side. Enter your email to sign up for the Stress, but less newsletter.

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Torah Thought

Vulnerability Is Strength By Rabbi Zvi Teichman

n the realm of healthy human interaction one of the most vital traits for survival is compassion. We must be sensitive towards other people’s needs and feelings. Especially when someone else is in pain or facing a challenging ordeal we must sympathize with their plight. But what is even more critical in developing meaningful relationships is our ability to empathize, to actually ‘feel’ their suffering and anguish.

Although there are myriad of laws that define the responsibility we have towards one another in helping each other, there is only one law that specifically calls for our ‘fitting into another’s shoes’ and actually ‘feeling’ the emotional pain of someone else. When someone is in need of a loan we are commanded to lend him the money he may need. In describing the attitude, one should have when rendering this kindness to a borrower, the Torah states: When you lend money to My people, — ‫העני עמך‬to the poor person who is with you. (‫כב כד‬ The Midrash Tanchuma sees in this expression, ‘to the poor person who is with you’, not merely a description of the geographical location of the borrower who is part of your community, but rather as a directive to the lender to empathize with the dire straits of the borrower and for the lender to visualize as if the poor person ‘is with you’, i.e. is you! Of all the numerous injunctions we have to extend compassion to the indigent, whether it be widows and orphans, converts, or charity to the poor, only here are we instructed , ‫הסתכל בעצמך‬ ‫כאילו אתה עני‬, to imagine yourself as the one in need. What is unique to this situation that specifically calls for empathy? In this phrase ‫תלוה |אם כסף‬, there is a ‫פסיק‬, literally a ‘stop’ between the word ‫כסף‬and ‫תלוה‬. It is as if the Torah were

stating: ‘If you have money — Lend My people...’. It would almost seem to de-emphasize the money as being merely tangential to the cause, with the stress on the word ‘lend’. But isn’t it the ‘money’ that is being lent the objective here? Truth be told, the word we use for ‘lending’, ‫תלוה‬, doesn’t really mean ‘loan’, but rather to ‘connect’. When Leah bears a third child to Yaakov, she expresses her hope that in lieu of her worthy contribution to Yaakov’s legacy, This time my husband, ‫ילוה‬ — will become attached to me... (‫כט לד‬ What exactly is the Torah trying to teach us here? A person who is seeking a loan is someone who clearly intends to make restitution. He evidently has a skill or profession that brings him an income but nevertheless finds himself in need of cash. While until now he felt secure and confident in his ability to provide for himself and his family he suddenly discovers he is vulnerable. It is extremely difficult for an individual to share one’s vulnerability, it is often accompanied with a sense of shame and personal failure. At this critical juncture it is not enough for a likely lender to simply sympathize with the plight of the borrower. Sympathy has the potential to cast an aura of distance and blame. How often do we react when we hear about another’s predicament with a body language that bespeaks, ‘Oh you poor thing’, intimating perhaps the victim’s poor choices or circumstances that brought him to that point? We at times instinctively offer instant advice on how to solve the situation or try to point out how despite their predicament it could have been worse. Although our responses may stem from pity and compassion, nevertheless this sympathy alone will not provide the

support for the petitioner in his time of need. Only if we are brave enough to identify with the other’s pain by drawing from our own personal experiences, when we too were vulnerable and frightened and at a total loss as to what to do or where to turn, can we ‘connect’ with our friend in strife. Sympathy allows one to project a sense of superiority. In our need to feel secure we dupe ourselves into thinking we are different, protected and invulnerable. That attitude merely ignites distance and at times even disdain. Only when we are ready to concede our vulnerability can we expect to connect and effectively support those we truly care about in conveying a sense that ‘I am in this with you’. So it is not the money that is really important in this command to lend, as much as it is the sincere empathic connection we make with others in fortifying them in trying times. Might it be that in Leah’s naming of her first three children in the context of her precarious relationship with Yaakov that was due to his disappointment in the switch that took place on that fatal night of his ‘assumed’ wedding to his ‘beloved’ Rachel, she was attempting to teach us how she succeeded in restoring her vital ‘connection’ to Yaakov? Upon the birth of her first son Reuven she calls him such to commemorate G-d having ‘seen my humiliation, for now my husband will love me’. She sets the stage for reconciliation by first drawing attention to her pain. Despite her tough exterior she courageously displays her vulnerability to Yaakov so he may begin to sympathize with her plight. The next child is named Shimon to memorialize that G-d ‘has heard that I am unloved. He has given me this one also’. It is not enough to merely ‘see’ the pain, she intimates, but one must ‘hear’ it, subtly suggesting to Yaakov to identify more deeply with that sense of ‘distance’ she felt. Perhaps her use of the specific term ‫שנאה‬, literally hatred, in her describing how, ‫כי שנואה אנכי‬, ‘for I was hated’, was a powerful hint to Yaakov to contemplate his own experience with his ‘hateful’ brother, Esav, hoping he would utilize that familiarity in ‘empathizing’ with Leah’s sense of painful isolation. Finally when she begets Levi, whose name represents how ‘now my husband will become attached to me’, she achieves her goal in restoring the instinctive bond she had with Yaakov. In the naming of the former children

the Torah informs that Leah herself bestowed those names, whereas by Levi it states clearly ‘He called his name Levi’, referring to Yaakov loudly attesting to his now exquisite connection to Leah. Dr. Brene Brown, a renowned scholar and therapist who has done extensive research on the topic of empathy writes: “No one reaches out to you for compassion or empathy so you can teach them how to behave better. They reach out to us because they believe in our capacity to know our darkness well enough to sit in the dark with them.” “Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” When the Torah calls on the lender to be responsive to the need of the borrower before him by ‘visualizing as if he is the impoverished’ perhaps it is not simply about imagining as if he were him, but a summons to realize our own ‘vulnerabilities’ and utilize that reality to lower our guard and enable ourselves to identify with those who desperately seek connection. The word empathy doesn’t seem to have a counterpart in the Hebrew language. The word we use for compassion is ‫רחמים‬, usually implying mercy. There are many who suggest that the word ‫רח־‬ ‫מים‬finds its root from ‫רחֶ ם‬,ֶ the womb of a woman wherein a child is formed and bestowed with unparalleled motherly compassion and concern.

But perhaps in a more profound sense it reflects on that absolute ‘connection’ that exists between a mother and her fetus, where one is subsumed totally by the other. Isn’t that the essence of empathy? May we always be attuned to those who are willing to expose their vulnerabilities in allowing others to connect with them. May we permit ourselves the brutal honesty we need to admit our own weaknesses that empower us to connect and identify effectively with others in restoring the unity that bonds us as the children of the Almighty. If we succeed in bonding with each other, we will merit that G-d, who too is called ‫אישי‬, my Husband, will ‘attach’ Himself to us in fulfillment of the verse, ‫הפעם ילוה‬, This time my husband will become attached to me...! You may reach the author at: Ravzt@ohelmoshebaltimore.com

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME JANUARY 27, 2022

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B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

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3. HEADS ABOVE THE REST

Sary or Irene wig (non-lace top) of your choice with cut from Yehudis Wigs sponsored in part by Norm & Cheryl Gras

4. DISNEY DREAM

Two-night stay at the Hilton Orlando/Altamonte Springs Hotel $500 gift card to Disney sponsored by Harborview Capital Partners

5. WANNA GET AWAY?

Studio apartment in Park City, Utah for a mutually agreed upon week donated by Susan Bonowitz $500 gift card to Southwest Airlines sponsored by Harborview Capital Partners

6. IT’S A DATE

$200 gift card to Sushi Sakura $180 gift card to Taam Thai $180 gift card to Serengeti sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld $100 gift card to Yesh $100 gift card to Accents $100 gift card to Dougie’s Above two sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld

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Masterbuilt Gravity Series 1050 charcoal grill + smoker sponsored by Adam & Phran Edelman Case of Herzog Alexander Valley Cabernet wine donated by Josh Phillips & Royal Wines $100 gift card to Shlomo’s Meat Market sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld $100 gift card to Wasserman & Lemberger sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld

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TCL 70" LED UHD Smart TV and Xbox series S with Fortnite & Rocket League bundle sponsored by Richard & Jennifer Berman Recliner from Price Busters Furniture

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Six tickets (1st and 2nd rows behind dugout) for a mutually agreed upon Orioles game in 2022 donated by Josh Fidler & Larry Macks Two tickets (50-yard line seats) for a mutually agreed upon Ravens game in 2022 donated by John Davison Cal Ripkin autographed 2131 consecutive streak game ball donated by Isaac Dwek Ravens & Orioles merchandise from Baltimore Sports & Novelty sponsored in part by Simcha & Leah Kossman

12. WASHINGTON REPRESENTATIVE

Four Club tickets for a mutually agreed upon Nationals game in 2022 Four great seats for March 2 MD Terps vs. Minnesota game donated by Rachel Klein MD Terps merchandise from Baltimore Sports & Novelty sponsored in part by Simcha & Leah Kossman $100 gift card to Al Ha-esh $100 gift card to Oh Mama Grill $100 gift card to Max’s Kosher Café Above three sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld

13. SHOPPING SPREE

$500 gift card to Amazon sponsored by Yaakov Resnick in memory of Shmuel ben Yaakov and Rabbi Moshe & Carol Kosman

14. SHOW ME THE MONEY

$500 cash sponsored by Mark & Frayda Prince

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

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Four passes to Hershey Park 10 tickets to an Orioles game 10 passes to Guppy Gulch $120 gift card to Chef Dan $100 gift card to Playa Bowls $100 gift card to Caramel’s Pizza sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld $90 gift card to Goldberg’s Bagels $90 gift card to Mama Leah’s Lunch for four at David Chu’s $50 gift card to Milk & Honey Bistro $50 Fun Pass to Adventure Park USA Four passes to KID Museum

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JANUARY 27, 2022

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Custom-made men’s suit with premium fabric from Gage Court Clothiers $100 gift card to Hat Box $100 gift card to Men’s Wearhouse

8. HOME SWEET HOME

$500 gift card to Klein’s ShopRite Crystal pedestal vase, challah tray and cover, candle sticks, havdalah set and more from Gifts By Gilda One-of-a-kind alcohol ink Hadlakat Neirot print with resin overlay from Abstract Life Studios $100 gift card to Shabsi’s Judaica $100 gift card to Knish Shop $100 gift card to Parisers $100 gift card to Seven Mile Market sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld $100 gift card to Market Maven sponsored by Howard & Shirley Blumenfeld $50 gift card to Candy Store $50 gift card to Giant Six-month water cooler rental with three jugs from Blue Mountain Water

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AUCTION

Shevat 28

Shevat 21

Sunday

Shevat/Adar Alef

Adar A 21

Winter Break

Adar A 14

Adar A 7

‫ראש חודש‬

Shevat 29

Shevat 22

Monday 24

Adar A 22

Adar A 15

Adar A 23

Adar A 16

Adar A 9

Adar A 2

Shevat 24

Wednesday Wednesday 26

Etz Chaim Campaign see page 25

Adar A 8

‫ראש חודש‬

Adar A 1

Shevat 23

Tuesday Tuesday

2022 January/February

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

30 Rofim Rofim International International Bikur Bikur Cholim Cholim Workshop Workshop @12 see page 19

Adar A 20

Adar A 13

Adar A 6

WITS WITS Parent Parent InfoInfo Session see Session page 40

JANUARY 27, 2022

5:36 PM

Adar A 25

5:28 PM

Adar A 18

5:20 PM

Winter Break

Adar A 11

5:12 PM

Adar A 4

5:04 PM

Shevat 26

Friday Friday

Shevat 27

Adar A 5

6:14 PM

Shevat 12

6:21 PM

Adar A 19

6:36 PM

Adar A 26

‫פרשת ויקהל‬

‫ פרשת כי תשא‬6:29 PM

‫פרשת תצוה‬

‫פרשת תרומה‬

‫ פרשת משפטים‬6:06 PM

Saturday Saturday

Community Calendar

Adar A 24

Adar A 17

Next BJH Issue

Adar A 10

Adar A 3

Next BJH Issue

Shevat 25

Thursday Thursday 27

Next BJH Issue

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Become a Holocaust Educator.

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

My Israel Home

JANUARY 27, 2022

Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

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By Gedaliah Borvick

Refugees on the St. Louis being denied entry to Havana, Cuba, on June 1, 1939

I B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

n honor of International Holocaust Remembrance Day, which falls out on January 27, let’s study the history of the Aliyah Bet, the code name for the illegal operation of refugee ships before, during, and after the Holocaust. Throughout the dark period enshrouding the Holocaust, refugee ships were used to help Jews escape the Nazis. This operation continued after the war, as ships transported Holocaust survivors to British Mandate Palestine in violation of the infamous White Paper, which Britain had imposed in 1939 to impede Jewish immigration. Like most important episodes leading up to the country’s establishment, streets in Ashdod, Kiryat Gat, Ashkelon, Netanya, Dimona, Lod, Ramla, and Zichron Yaakov were named in honor of the most famous ship, the Exodus 1947. Likewise, streets were named after other refugee ships, such as Pancho Street in Netanya, and streets across the country were named Aliyah Bet. Over 60,000 illegal immigrants were snuck into Palestine on refugee ships, but many of the rescue efforts were unsuccessful. Let’s focus on three

examples, which reflect activities prior to, during, and following World War II. The St. Louis In May 1939, 937 Jewish refugees left Hamburg, Germany, en route to Cuba. All of the passengers had landing certificates granting them entry into the country, but when the St. Louis arrived in Havana, Cuba’s president refused to honor the documents. After leaving Havana, the ship sailed so close to the Florida coast that the passengers could see the lights of Miami. The United States, and then Canada, turned down the captain’s many pleas for humanitarian assistance and prohibited the ship from docking. The St. Louis returned to western Europe, and within a few months, the Germans overran western Europe. Over 250 of the passengers were killed by the Nazi death machine. The Struma In December 1941, 767 Jews boarded the Struma in Romania, with plans to travel to Turkey, apply for visas to Palestine, and then continue to Palestine. When the Struma arrived in Istanbul, the passengers were informed that they would neither receive visas

Buchenwald survivors aboard an Aliyah Bet ship (WZO)

to enter Palestine nor be permitted to enter Turkey. The unsafe and overcrowded ship was confined to Istanbul’s harbor for over two months, as the British would not consent to the Struma’s continued journey to Palestine. On February 23, 1942, the Turkish police towed the Struma out to sea and abandoned it. The very next day, it sank and all but one of the passengers were killed. The Exodus 1947 The Exodus 1947 is the most famous of all refugee ships, thanks in part to Leon Uris’ bestselling historical novel, which later became a hit movie. In July 1947, 4,500 Holocaust survivors from displaced persons camps boarded the ship in France and attempted to sail to Palestine. British war ships intercepted the vessel, and a battle ensued between naval forces and the ship’s passengers. A crew member and two passengers were killed, and dozens more suffered injuries. Attempting to discourage similar future illegal activity, British forces transferred the passengers onto three navy transports, which returned to Europe. When the ships landed in France, the passengers refused to disembark,

and the French authorities similarly refused to remove the refugees. Realizing their public relations gaffe, British authorities decided to wait out the passengers, whom they hoped would eventually voluntarily leave the ship. The passengers responded by declaring a hunger strike, which lasted 24 days and made front page headlines worldwide. Mounting public protests across the globe compelled British authorities to find a solution. Exacerbating their blunders, the British government transported the refugees to Hamburg, where they were cruelly detained in British camps, causing international outrage. This unfortunate incident had a silver lining, as it played a significant role in swaying global policymakers to adopt the UN Partition Plan a few months later on November 29, 1947, which led to the creation of the State of Israel in 1948.

Gedaliah Borvick is the founder of My Israel Home (www.myisraelhome.com), a real estate agency focused on helping people from abroad buy and sell homes in Israel. To sign up for his monthly market updates, contact him at gborvick@gmail.com.

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

JANUARY 27, 2022

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Parenting Pearls

JANUARY 27, 2022

Sweatshirts and Cup Lids

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

By Sara Rayvych, MSEd

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

e tend to think of helping others and making a difference on a grand scale with great impacts. We then doubt what kind of difference we can make as a single individual. Certainly, we can doubt what our children can do being so young and seemingly less capable of performing grandiose acts. There are a few problems with this attitude. Chessed is meant to be something everyone can do. When Hashem gives us a mitzvah, it means we can do it because Hashem only gives us what is within our capabilities, even if it may seem challenging. Additionally, we don’t want to get into the mindset of thinking we are mere “grasshoppers” and sell ourselves short. Even more than that, we want to raise the next generation to act and accomplish, not naysay all potential. A few recent situations in our family brought out how powerful a small act of chessed can be in the life of an individual. We don’t need to move mountains to change someone’s day.

Scenario #1 It’s always amazing how the smallest of bodies can produce the loudest of noises. You’d think homemade hot chocolate would be enough of a treat on this below-freezing day. Sadly, the

drink is incomplete without a lid to cover it. He’s simply unable to enjoy a steaming, tasty beverage without the proper accessories, and the screaming continues. Two minutes later, my daughter saves the day when she presents to him her very own lid. He’s happy, and she asks if that chessed is deserving of a second cup of hot chocolate.

we need a serious food shopping trip but feel uncomfortable imposing that burden on anyone. A long-time family friend offers, insisting it wouldn’t be a bother, and my husband and I are relieved to have one less worry. She shops and delivers to us all we need to have a wonderful Shabbos in quarantine, and the kids discover she picks out better Shabbos treats than we do.

Scenario #2

Often, what makes the biggest difference in our day-to-day life isn’t the most earth-shattering of acts but the simplest of deeds. We can easily appreciate what someone has done for us, even as they neglect to notice the impact of their own actions. If we each took a few moments to think about how someone helped us we’d realize it’s often something seemingly minor that ends up being so meaningful. Since the pandemic started, I feel this has become even more true. So often, we’ve found ourselves suddenly dependent on one other and able to assist in the simplest, yet most substantial of ways. Despite social distancing bringing us physically apart, chessed has brought us emotionally closer. Personally, I found this to be extremely powerful. Even as limited as we may feel, we still have the ability to do greatness. Even more incredible is

I was surprised but not shocked when our family suddenly found out we were experiencing the Omicron wave. As my body forgot what it meant to maintain a normal body temperature, my shivering self was desperate for a warm, comfortable sweatshirt. I feverishly tried the online sites that offered quick delivery but couldn’t find anything appropriate with fast shipping. A quick text to my family resulted in my sister saving the day when mere hours later my new sweatshirt was handed to me. For the duration of the illness, I had something appropriate to recuperate in, and it made a tremendous difference in my personal comfort.

Scenario #3 After suddenly having our family thrust into quarantine, I realize

how empowering this can be for children. When you think about it, in the story above, just by giving her personal hot cup lid to her brother, my daughter was able to completely change her little brother’s mood. Simply reading a story to a younger sibling can create calm. There is so much our children can do, all within their limitations.

Appreciate Their Contribution Children take their cues from us. If we dismiss their accomplishments, then they will, too. But, if we point out their accomplishments and give them a sense of pride in their ma’asim tovim then they will recognize their potential and bring it one step farther. Children who feel accomplished want that feeling to continue, and they will find more opportunities to procure that invigorating emotion. A child who realizes they can put a sibling to sleep with a story may volunteer again the next night. After all, they can be a big helper. For many individuals, particularly the elderly, shoveling snow is not only difficult but outright dangerous. When a child gets praised by the neighbor for voluntarily shoveling their snow, that child can deeply feel what a contribution they made to the neighbor’s safety

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44 and well-being. When a child helps clear the table after the course, it may take them less than five minutes. To the one busy serving, clearing, and organizing, that’s one less step and frees them for the next task. Those five minutes just made the next course run exponentially smoother. These are but a small sample of possibilities. Small contributions add up, and children can readily feel pride in their input. Mitzvah goreres mitzvah can have real meaning.

maturity, and personal talents will help influence the possibilities. Sharing their toys, hot cup lid, or other treasured item is something even the youngest of children can do (depending on their mood). Many children are able to play with a bored younger

or take a desperate for fresh air little one to the park. They are nearly as capable as adults, and we need to seriously recognize what they can accomplish. I’m reminded of the post-Sandy period when our high schoolers stepped up and did everything from

Despite social distancing bringing us physically apart, chessed has brought us emotionally closer.

Make it Practical Guide children in how they can help and what possible results they can expect. It can be hard for a youngster to see where they can be of assistance. Furthermore, it can be difficult for them to see how that will benefit another. Give them practical ideas of things they can do. Show them any relevant steps; what’s obvious to an adult may be unclear to a child. Age, emotional

sibling, read a story, or help out with minor chores. They can branch out further as they grow. Teenagers are far more capable than we give them credit for. A bar mitzvah boy can be the tenth at a shiva (or any) minyan, enabling the aveilim to say kaddish. Both genders can prepare for Shabbos when Mommy is sick

food service and apartment sanitizing to assisting displaced families. Specify for them the results of their efforts. If they’ve managed to calm a screaming sibling, you can tell them how amazing it was that they can make someone else happy. If they’ve cleaned the table or an area, show them how much cleaner that location

A Healing Laugh B A LT I M O R E

B A LT I M O R E

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Using Humor to Cope with Stress

is. If they shoveled your snow, thank them for giving you a safe walkway. It’s easy for all of us to simply gloss over and minimize the impact of their actions. Making a conscious effort to not only mentally, but also verbally, acknowledge their contributions can take their behavior from “something nice” to “something special.” Only by being cognizant of the significance of their actions, and the immense benefit produced, can they appreciate that a small act on their part can yield an impressive result for the recipient. Olam chesed yiboneh. Let’s continue to do many acts of small chassadim that add up to big differences. May Hashem grant us the ability to continue to help each other in good health and simcha.

Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at RayvychHomeschool@gmail.com.

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME JANUARY 27, 2022

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JANUARY 27, 2022

Teen Talk

By Rabbi Doniel Drandoff, LMFT

Dear Teen Talk,

I have a big problem, and I don’t know how to help myself. Simply put, I am awkward. It’s hard for me to remember exactly when I became aware of

Teen Talk , column in

a new

TJH, is geared to wards the teens in o ur commu nity. Answered by a rotati ng roster of teachers, rebbeim, clinicians , an d peers (!), te ens will b e hearing answers to many que stions the had perco y lating in th eir minds wished th an d ey had th e answers for.

this, but it had to be sometime in middle school. What is awkward about me? Everything! I always say inappropriate things to people in social situations, so I usually avoid them all together. People are always pointing out buttons missing from my uniform or a tear in my skirt. Why don’t I notice? Oh, and I am clumsy, too. My parents think I am the greatest kid ever. They adore me and would never understand my feelings about myself. They think I am beautiful and smart and see my good grades as a sign that all is well. They even view my clumsiness as being cute and “part of my charm.” But you know what? I’d rather not be cute or charming! Why can’t I just be normal?

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-Baila, 16

aila, the most important message I want you to hear loud and clear is that you are perfectly normal. I am so sorry that you feel so down on yourself. I know that it can be really embarrassing to feel clumsy or spacy. And it makes you feel like you have to avoid any type of social gathering. But I want to share some insights, and some advice, that may ease your mind and begin to help you see yourself in a completely diﬀerent light. The ﬁrst thing that sticks out from your letter is your perception that “everything” is awkward about you. Now, surely there are qualities that you possess which are not awkward! I also noticed the words “always” and “never” a few times. 1. Step one is to recognize the allor-nothing, black-and-white extreme thinking. Very often such extreme

thinking is rooted in perfectionism. Do you ﬁnd that you often hold yourself to a very high standard? You make mention of your good grades. I am willing to bet that you are very studious and that you do very well in school. I am also willing to bet that when your teacher returns your test with an excellent score of 99%, your immediate thought is, “What happened to the other 1%?!” You should know that this kind of thinking is not uncommon, but that at its root it is a sign of black and white thinking. Perfectionism is dangerous because perfection is an unattainable goal. If our goals are impossible to reach, we will be living in a constant state of disappointment and perceived inferiority, so it is really important to have goals that are

fair and realistic. When Yaakov Avinu was on his way to Charan, the Torah tells us of the dream he had. Hashem showed Yaakov Avinu a vision of a sulam mutzav artza v’rosho magiya hashamayma, a ladder planted on the ground with its top reaching the heavens. There is so much to be said about this incredible parsha of Yaakov Avinu’s dream. However, I want to focus on the nature of the ladder, particularly the way the Torah describes it. The top is in heaven, but it is ﬁrmly planted on earth. As the saying goes, have your head in the clouds and your feet ﬁrmly planted on the ground! Hashem is giving Yaakov Avinu an eitzah, a mission, as he is heading into the world to face Lavan. Keep yourself grounded! You must have lofty goals

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but, at the same time, in order for success to be possible, you must remain realistic. You must be honest with yourself and know what your strengths and weaknesses are. Only then can you move forward in the world and fulfill your potential. So long as your head in the clouds is detached from two firmly planted feet on earth, you will remain frustrated by your lack of progress. 2. So how do you get there? The million-dollar question! Let’s start with something very practical. Every day, before you go to sleep, I want you to take some time to put your thoughts into a journal. Specifically, write out some of the thoughts you had about yourself that day. Do this for a week. Then, at the end of the week, look over the week’s entries and reflect upon the content and tone of your self-reflections. Were you fair to yourself? Imagine that you were writing about your close friend or sibling. Do you feel that your words are balanced and honest? Are your words a true and full reflection of re-

Are you a teen with a question? If you have a question or problem you’d like our columnists to address, email your question or insight to editor@fivetownsjewishhome.com, subject line: Teen Talk.

discount another truth. Namely, that you took a positive step. When you are finished writing the second version for all of the week’s entries, take some time to reflect upon the differences between the two versions, in both content and tone. This is the first step in changing the way that you think. I was recently speaking with an old client of mine. He was a teenager when we met, and, at the time, he was struggling with perfectionism. He had a very hard time making – and keeping – friends. He was constantly doubting himself and questioning the motives and opinions of others. He really couldn’t accept the pos-

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

You must be honest with yourself and know what your strengths and weaknesses are. ality? If not, try to write each entry over in a way that is more fair and honest. Be kind to yourself. If on Tuesday you wrote, “Once again, I made a fool of myself at recess when shmoozing with girls in my class,” maybe upon reﬂection at the end of the week you can write, “I went out of my comfort zone at recess and shmoozed with some girls. It was a good step even though I wasn’t happy with something I said.” See the diﬀerence a little kindness can make? We are not sugar-coating or making believe that problems aren’t real. Rather, we are recognizing that there is something imperfect, but we are putting it into perspective. We are laying it down against a backdrop of reality, fairness, and kindness. Maybe you said something “awkward.” That truth does not

sibility that he was likeable or that his peers would want to hang out with him. He felt that he had nothing to offer so why would anyone truly enjoy his company. I met him at a bar mitzvah a few months ago, and he is now 22 and considering starting shidduchim. He shared with me that he feels better than ever and that he remembers his journaling as a life-changing activity. Obviously, there is a lot more to his story, but journaling stuck out in his mind. It can be really powerful to process your feelings in writing, and then come face-to-face with those feelings by truly reflecting upon them and analyzing them. 3. Another point I’d like you to consider is that your perception of yourself does not necessarily reflect reality and that others may view you differently.

Even if you are a bit clumsy, it is unlikely that anyone judges you as harshly as you judge yourself. At the same time, it is unlikely that anyone notices all that you do that causes you to feel clumsy. And guess what? People who are clumsy are no less successful in life and in relationships. Because the number one indicator of success is self-esteem and self-regard. People who judge themselves favorably are far more successful than those who beat themselves up. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try to be more aware and curb the clumsiness. If that is important to you and you want to work on it, then great! But accept yourself and love yourself first. 4. If you are able to love yourself, you’ll find it easier to work on some of those aspects that you aren’t entirely happy with. But just know that you are perfectly fine as you are! Being a little clumsy says nothing of your character and your self-worth. Which brings me to another important point. Spend some time considering your strengths and your positive qualities. I know you have many! But you have gotten into a pattern of only seeing the perceived negatives, while completely ignoring what makes you special and amazing. So get to work thinking about those special qualities that Hashem bestowed upon you. In doing so you will fulfill the Mishna in Pirkei Avos which says, “Hevi dan es kol ha’adam l’chaf zechus”. Kol ha’adam means the entire person. Judge the whole you! Not just the parts you perceive as troubling. When you come to judge yourself, you must see the whole you. And I have no doubt that when you see yourself with all that makes you special and unique you will be forced to smile and say, “I’m great!”

Rabbi Doniel Drandoff is a Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice in the Five Towns/Far Rockaway community, as well as Clinical Director of My Extended Family. He works with teens, young adults, families, and couples. You can reach Rabbi Drandoff at Dndrandoff@gmail.com.

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Common

Cents

By Elliot Pepper, CPA, CFP®, MST

Cash Flow & Budgeting Simplified Ending the Endless Failure of New Year’s Resolutions! Part II

s a recent college graduate entering the workforce, married with two young children, and the proud new title of CPA after my name, I recall vividly exclaiming to my wife, “Don’t worry, you are married to an accountant, I am going to meticulously track our budget in a beautifully maintained spreadsheet and every dollar will be carefully accounted for!” I had a whole plan - every month, I was going to download PDFs of my credit card and bank statements and track all of my income and spending by category. I even had Excel formulas that would change colors depending on the direction of my cash flow for the month. I had a plan, I started to follow it, and by the end of March, I was done… Fast forward 12 years and while I have added some letters to my professional name, lost some hair, and gained a few pounds, that spreadsheet is still only stubbornly updated though March 2010. This article is not about how great it is to just “wing it” when it comes to money management nor is it about how failure to account for every penny spent every month is a cardinal sin. This article is about appreciating the fact that most people would prefer spending Saturday nights watching a movie or spending time with friends and family (or writing their personal finance blog ;)) rather than reconciling credit card statements. Yes, it is possible to get your Saturday nights back without sacrificing fiscal responsibility, and this article will tell you how.

The “Gut Check” Cash Flow: From 10,000 feet While it is easy to get caught up in the short term volatility of cash flow in our accounts, the simple rule is that, over time: Cash Inflows + Savings/Investment > Cash Spending A perfect way to test your adherence to this rule is to simply tally up the total balance in your checking

and savings account on the first statement of 2021 and then again for the last statement. Add any amounts that you transferred to another savings or investment account, but not if those were deducted from your paycheck. If the change is positive - congrats! You met the simple rule for 2021. If not, it’s time to understand why, and fix it. You have three choices, listed in order of preference: 1. Increase Inflows: Find ways to increase your income 2. Decrease Spending: Reduce spending on those items that you can 3. Decrease Savings/Investment: Ignore this step until you have honestly addressed #1 & #2 You can do this easily on a piece of paper or in a simple spreadsheet. E-mail commoncents@Northbrookfinancial.com for a copy of our very easy to use Excel “Cash Flow at 10,000 Feet” template. The Review & Automated Guardrails The Review: Review your annual credit card statement report, or download the last 3 months’ worth of bank and credit card statements. Categorize your monthly (or annual) spending by the necessary “have to”s and the discretionary “want to”s. Pay attention to these categories and cut out any unnecessary expenses you see (subscriptions you never use) and see if there are any necessary expenses that can be revisited (internet/cable, car insurance). These are the “low hanging fruit” of personal finance and are simple enough tasks that can be done once or twice a year. Automated Guardrails: Set up an automatic monthly transfer from your checking to your savings or investment account. How much? Well, for starters, consider taking the difference between income and spending and automate that as a monthly transfer. An automated savings strategy provides so many benefits: • Keeping yourself to the simple

Cash Inflows + Savings/Investment > Cash Spending rule from above: Cash Inflows + Savings/Investment > Cash Spending • Continuously purchasing investment assets, no matter the market conditions. • Shifting from cash to assets that will turn into more cash in the future • Potentially saving on taxes • Strengthening your net worth More important than the amount that you contribute is just doing it. The habit of automated savings will pay huge dividends (literally!). If you already have a fully funded Emergency Fund, start contributions to an investment account (IRA, 401K, Brokerage). Invest early, and invest often! You can use many free online budgeting apps to help with both the “Gut Check” and “The Review& Automated Guardrails” referenced above. Email commoncents@Northbrookfinancial.com for an Excel version of our “Review Template.” Tracking spending, savings, and investing is important. Being realistic about what one should do and will do is just as important. If you are having trouble meeting the “Simple Rule” identified above, then yes - getting into the weeds of your spending habits is important, but it is not a lifelong sentence. Once you are compliant with the Simple Rule, you can step back and feel good that your spending habits are not going to bankrupt you, and can use the automated guardrails

to go from a stagnant net worth to a growing net worth. While managing spending is important, the real goal is to manage cash flow today and set a foundation to accumulate wealth. By focusing on this goal, less time can be spent on tedious expense tracking, allowing for more time spent on setting financial milestones and tailoring behavior to reach them. A practical understanding of Cash Flow Management will let you stress less about money, leaving more room to just enjoy life! Take back your finances in 2022 without spending endless hours crunching numbers. Follow the Simple Rule of Cash Flow, make some tweaks and set up your guardrails and enjoy that movie with your family this Saturday night! The decision to start saving and investing is yours, but the “how” can be hard. We suggest speaking with a “fee only” financial planner operating as a fiduciary - having a CPA or tax background is a huge plus. Email commoncents@northbrookfinancial.com to schedule a free financial planning consultation with our team. Elliot

Pepper,

CPA,

CFP®,

MST

Co-Founder of Northbrook Financial, a Financial Planning, Tax, and Investment Management Firm. He has developed and continues to teach a popular Financial Literacy course for high school students.

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

JANUARY 27, 2022

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Mental Health Corner

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

JANUARY 27, 2022

The Risks of Parentification of a Child By Rabbi Azriel Hauptman Our lives can be like a roller coaster with many ups and downs. When we are going through a difficult time, we rely on our family and friends to be a listening ear and offer emotional support. However, there is one person who you should not look to for your emotional needs. That person is your child. In order to explain what we mean, let us present you with two scenarios. Scenario 1: Rachel was going through an especially trying time. One day, when she was alone in her room she felt so much stress that she began sobbing. Her nine-year-old daughter happened to be passing by in the hallway and heard her mother’s sobs. She entered the room, put her arm around her mother’s shoulder, and said to her, “Don’t worry Mommy. Everything is going to be all right.” Rachel responded and said, “You always make me feel so good. Can I ask you to put your arm around my shoulder whenever I am having a bad day?” Scenario 2: When Rachel’s daughter put her arm on her shoulder and as-

sured her mother that everything will be all right, Rachel responded and said, “Thank you so much for saying that. I want you to know that it is okay to cry sometimes when you are sad. Sometimes we are happy and we laugh, and sometimes we are sad and feel a need to cry.” You surely noticed that in the first scenario, the child is functioning almost like a parent as she provides emotional support for her mother. In the second scenario, Rachel switched into parental mode when her daughter entered the room and used this as a teachable moment to show by example how one can deal with and process a stressful situation. Rachel also absolved her daughter of being responsible for taking care of her mother. The first scenario is just one example of how a parent can inappropriately turn to a child for the fulfillment of their emotional needs. Another common example is when parents overshare with children. Discussing with your child the ins-and-outs of your issues at work or with other family

members is not an age appropriate topic for children. Additionally, it sends your child a message that they have a responsibility to be a listening ear for their parent. It is true that when a child feels that their parent needs them for emotional support, it can initially feel very exciting for them since they are being treated as an adult. However, over time this can have a devastating effect on their emotional development and is essentially a form of emotional abuse. By trying to meet the emotional needs of their parents, children are not having their own emotional needs met. They can grow up with the mistaken notion that their own needs do not count and they should only focus on taking care of everybody else. Although this sounds very noble and altruistic, in reality this type of perspective is a recipe for dysfunctional relationships. You should bear two points in mind when deciding what is appropriate to share with your child. First of all, they are mere children! There

is a big difference between age 8 and 38! In addition, your child is a separate and distinct individual and is not an extension of yourself. Just because they are around you all of the time and you provide them with all of their needs, does not allow you to lift all boundaries and share with them whatever you want. If once in a blue moon, you overshare with your child, it is unlikely to cause lasting harm. Mistakes in parenting happen, and we should try our best to learn from them. When parentification of a child becomes a pattern and the role of a child is elevated to that of a pattern, the child might become emotionally injured in ways that can stay with him or her for the rest of their life. This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals, education, and support to the frum community. Rabbi Yisrael Slansky is director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-448-8356 or at yslansky@ reliefhelp.org

Engagements Yosef Wilheim (Cincinnati) to Rena Grunhaus (Baltimore) Yehudah Leib Tendler to Chana Goldman (Both Baltimore) Shloimy Blau (Brooklyn) to Devora Shapiro (Baltimore) Chaim Krause (Queens) to Malky Weinreb (Baltimore) Yehuda Bortz (St. Louis) to Hannah Grayman (Baltimore) Moshe Majeski (Baltimore) to Shira Haberman (LA) Want to see your simcha here? Email mazeltov@baltimorejewishhome.com or text 443-675-6507 to submit your simcha!

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JANUARY 27, 2022

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

JANUARY 27, 2022

TJH SNOW TRIVIA 1. On average, one inch of rain is equivalent to how many inches of snow? a. 10 inches b. 1 inch c. 5 inches d. 1 foot 2. Which state’s license plates have the slogan “Greatest Snow on Earth”? a. Vermont b. Utah c. Montana d. Colorado 3. What is the record for the most snowfall on the U.S. mainland over a 24-hour period? a. 38 inches b. 54 inches c. 76 inches d. 101 inches

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Centerfold 4. What causes a snowstorm to be defined as a blizzard? a. It’s an instinct. When people go to the store and buy ice cream, doughnuts, chips, and any junk food they can find because “tomorrow is an off day,” that’s when you know a blizzard is coming. b. When 12 or more inches of snow falls in a 24-hour period. c. Snowfall which is caused by an offshore front combined with a downward air mass (usually coming from Canada or the north) which causes a vortex followed by an arctic blast which causes atmospheric pressure wind system and cloud depression

Answers: 1. A 2. B 3. C- On April 14, 1921, in Silver Lake, Colorado, it snowed 76 inches over 24 hours. The storm raged for a total of 32.5 hours straight and ultimately left 95 inches (8 feet) of snow, which is the record for one continuous snowfall. Silver Lake is at 10,220 feet and about 40 miles west of Denver. 4. D 5. A- The 2007 Siberian orange snow was oily to the touch and reported to contain four times the normal level

thereby creating inflow humidity which results in surface saturation causing whiteout conditions. d. Sustained wind of 35 miles an hour winds and falling snow which causes visibility to be reduced to less than ½ of a mile. 5. What color snow fell over an area of 580 sq. miles in Siberia on February 2, 2007? a. Orange b. Black c. Pink d. Yellow 6. What is the average yearly snowfall in the New York City area? a. 9 inches b. 17 inches c. 34 inches d. 55 inches

of iron. Although an official cause for this phenomenon was never determined, it is believed that it was caused by a heavy sandstorm in neighboring Kazakhstan. 6. B Weather Report: 5-6 correct: WCBS 880’s weatherman Craig Allen better watch out for you. 3-4 correct: You are OK…a bit of brain freeze, but that’s understandable, considering the weather. 0-2 correct: When are you going to realize that these deep conversations you have with your snowman are not going to make you any smarter?

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

In Florida, people name their boats; in Michigan, the Department of Transportation names its snowplow trucks. The following are some of the real names of Michigan’s snowplow trucks.  Dr. Plow Good

 Blade of Glory

 Drift Crusher

 Blizzard Boss

 Ice Force One

 Dreams of Summer

 Shock & Thaw

 Fast & Flurryous

 Ice to Meet You

 Austin Plowers

 Flake Michigan

 I’d rather be at the Beach

 Below Zero Hero

 Almost Summer

 Ol’ Seven Fingers

 Clearopathtra

 Barry Salt-and-Sanders

 Pillsbury Plowboy

 Dolly Plowton

 Ctrl Salt Delete

 Plower Power

 Edgar Allan Snow

 It’s Snow Problem

 Polar Patroller

 Frosty The Snowplow

 Licensed to Chill

 Road Warrior

 Hipplowpotomus

 Plowasaurus Rex

 Salt Salt Baby

 Lighting McClean

 Mission Implowsible

 Snowdown Please

 Marco Plowo

 Saul T. Streets

 Storm Slayer

 Melton John

 Snow Worries

 Blizzard T Snowplow

 Will B. Snowday

 Still Shorts Weather

 Catch My Drift

 Aaron Birr, Sir.

 Weird Plow Yankovic

 Close Shave

 Clearing Present Danger

 Whiteout Wrangler

 Coldfoot

 Derek Sleeter

 ThawSome

Yankel and Moishe are sitting in shul. Yankel says to Moishe, “Oy, is it cold. I mean who would have thought that it would be 14 degrees?” Moishe replies, “Vat do you mean it’s 14 degrees? You must be getting very old? De vedder is beautiful.” Yankel says to Moishe, “Moishe, Moishe, I’m telling you I saw on the TV the weatherman standing with a thermometer outside that said 14 degrees!” “Oh, OK, maybe outside,” Moishe replies.

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 Big Bertha

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Can you think of any other president that has done as much in one year? Name one for me. I’m serious. You guys talk about how nothing has happened. I don’t think there’s been much on any incoming president’s plate that’s been a bigger menu than the plate I had given to me.

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- President Biden at last week’s press conference

You have a circumstance where people are paying more for a pound of hamburger meat than they ever paid. Well, one of the reasons for that is you don’t have that many folks out there that are ones that are — we’ve got the Big Four controlling it all. – Ibid., insinuating that there is a hamburger cartel in the U.S.

It doesn’t pay to boycott Israel. I will bless those who bless you. And I will curse him who curses you.

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– Tweet by Israel’s Interior Minister Ayelet Shaked in response to a report that Ben & Jerry’s parent company lost $26 billion in value since their boycott of parts of Israel

When the president of the United States says, “This is a pandemic of the unvaccinated,” it’s because him and his constituents – which I don’t know how there are any if you watch any of his attempts at public speaking, but I guess he got 81 million votes… But when you say stuff like that, and then you have the CDC, which, how do you even trust them, but then they come out and talk about 75% of the COVID deaths have at least four comorbidities. And you still have this fake White House set saying that this is the pandemic of the unvaccinated, that’s not helping the conversation.

I had G-d as my co-pilot . - Pilot Daniel Moore who crash-landed a medical helicopter without any loss of life last week

Asian Lives Matter - Words on some of the signs held up at a Times Square vigil for Michelle Go who was brutally shoved in front of a subway train and killed

I don’t usually play my fortune cookie numbers, but I tried them on a whim. - Gabriel Fierro, 60, of North Carolina, who won the $4 million Mega Millions prize using the numbers from a fortune cookie that he ate before purchasing the ticket

- Quarterback Aaron Rogers in an interview with Kevin Van Valkenburg of ESPN

I’ll tell you the reason I kinda said it. How I explain it is I feel like, kinda saying something like that, you gotta back it up, and so after saying that there’s kinda no other option but to go out there and make it. - Cincinnati Bengal’s kicker Evan McPherson explaining after last Sunday’s playoff game why right before kicking the game-winning 52 yard field goal he turned to a teammate and said, “It looks like we are going to the AFC championship!”

We are inspired by Hugo Chavez...Cesar Chavez. We are inspired by all of these leaders. - Rep. Hakeem Jeffries (D-NY) while advocating for the Democrats’ election takeover bill, accidentally invoking deceased Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, whose harsh socialist tactics destroyed Venezuela’s economy and turned it into a third-world country

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I’m not so sure he has, he’s certain, what he’s going to do. My guess is he will move in. He has to do something. - President Biden at a press conference last week suggesting that Russian President Vladimir Putin will invade Ukraine

If any Russian military forces move across the Ukrainian border, that’s a renewed invasion, and it will be met with a swift, severe, and united response from the United States and our Allies. – White House Press Secretary Jenn Psaki, moments after President Biden’s gaffe

Russia will be held accountable if it invades, and it depends on what it does. It’s one thing if it’s a minor incursion and then we end up having a fight about what to do and not do, et cetera. But if they actually do what they’re capable of doing with the forces amassed on the border, it is going to be a disaster for Russia if they further invade Ukraine. - President Biden at last week’s press conference

We want to remind the great powers that there are no minor incursions and small nations. Just as there are no minor casualties and little grief from the loss of loved ones. I say this as the President of a great power.

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- Tweet by Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy

I said this a few years ago – it’s what relationships are all about. It’s not always what I want, it’s what we want as a family. I’m gonna spend a lot of time with them and figure out in the future what’s next. Playing football I get so much joy from, I love it. But not playing football, there’s a lot of joy in that for me also now, too, with my kids getting older and seeing them develop and grow. - Tom Brady talking about possible retirement on the SiriusXM Let’s Go! podcast, one day after losing in the Divisional playoff round

Coming from an immigrant family, I will be the first to say that I am a member of the NYPD, the greatest police force in the world. - From an essay by NYPD officer Jason Rivera, 22, who was gunned down in Harlem on Saturday night

I know that something as small as helping a tourist with directions, or helping a couple resolve an issue will put a smile on someone’s face.

Stay in school. Don’t play with guns. Don’t rob people. Work for what you want.

- Ibid.

- A Philadelphia driver, who had a legal gun permit, talking to local TV reporters after he shot an attempted carjacker

This is the point we’ve been making for months. Look at the reaction and coverage tonight. Tear-jerker press conferences and proclamations of heroes coming soon… Being Black in D.C. is more dangerous than any job.

What a stupid question. - President Biden when asked last Thursday why he is waiting for Russia’s Putin to make the first move on Ukraine

Stupid [expletive]! - President Biden on Monday in response to a reporter’s question about inflation and lowering the prices of consumer goods

– Tweet by Black Lives Matter, D.C., hours after two young police officers were gunned down in Harlem on Saturday night

If you haven’t heard of Mr. Wittenstein, Google him. You’ll be amazed at the things that this man has done. – A Delta flight attendant during an in-flight farewell to Jerry (Gerald) Wittenstein, a frum physicist and rocket engineer who worked with NASA, who had been a regular on Delta’s New York-Florida route and who is now making Aliyah

OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

61 I told him I had the money in the house, and I figured, he’s not going to fall for that. Well, he fell for that hook, line, and sinker.

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- A Long Island grandmother, 73, talking to local news after she outsmarted a group of scammers who wanted $8,000 from her by luring them to her house and having police arrest them

Resist the pressure to act immediately. Legitimate business will give you time to make payments. Never pay with gift cards or wire money to an unknown person or business. - Nassau County PD spokesperson Richard Lebrun providing tips on how to avoid being scammed

— Jimmy Fallon

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- Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) after the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention acknowledged that cloth masks do not work as well against the coronavirus as N95 masks, an assertion that Sen. Paul made a year ago and for which YouTube suspended his account

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Does this mean snot-nosed censors at YouTube will come to my office…and admit I was right?

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A year ago, Biden pledged to address Covid, the economy, climate change and racial injustice. And good news — after 12 months of tireless effort, we’re all getting three free masks.

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

My son is eager to start shidduchim, and my husband and I are more than happy for him to start. The thing we are nervous about, though, is money. We live in a very wealthy neighborhood, but we bought our home many years ago when the market was low. We truly cannot

afford to have a wedding that is the standard of our community. But it will be a complete and utter embarrassment to have a wedding that is the kind we could afford. My husband

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is suggesting that we scrimp and save for about a year, potentially renting out our basement so that we could have some extra cash for all the expenses of a simcha. He thinks that in the meantime we should hold off on taking any ideas. If it’s meant to be, he can meet the right girl at the right time. I do not agree. I think that our son should start dating, and if he’s meant to find his bashert, we’ll figure out how to make it happen. My husband agreed to present this idea to the Navidaters for some guidance. Thanks in advance, -Not the Joneses (but trying to keep up)

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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The Panel The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.

our question is troubling on several levels but is honest. My first concern is relationships. I wonder about your communication with your son and your relationship with him as parents. He is not mentioned in your query. Are dating and an elaborate wedding only about your social standing? Either way, you have a problem on your hands. If he doesn’t need it and want it, it’s solely about you and your Jewish Jones-like social standing. It’s also unfair to do this to him. If he doesn’t need to keep up with the neighbors, consider yourself lucky that he has learned values from other sources. If he does want what you want, you have a serious family problem beyond just figuring out how to pay for a wedding. What kind of values are you living and teaching your children? I am guessing that this is your first child and you have been living above your means until now to keep up with the vacations, eating-out culture, and name brand lifestyle. Jewish parents know that family simchas will come and will cost. Responsible adults budget long-term and short-term for these as well as savings, retirement, and regular life. You probably need to have a twotrack approach, one that addresses values as well as finances. Sit down with a frum financial planner and figure things out so that you don’t fall into the trap of many frum families which neither save enough, nor plan for future needs, and live beyond their means. For decades, but especially now, Jewish media has cautioned members of the community to limit expenditures to what is reasonable within their means and have the courage to budget for regular and future expenses. As you work with a financial planner to figure out what you need to save and invest for re-

tirement, simchas, and emergencies, your need to re-examine your values will emerge. Open up to your religious mentor/rabbi and get the support you need. Obviously, if you haven’t done this until now, your need is great. Get started on this two-pronged process. You will need time and a lot of self-searching to examine the values you are living and modeling. It will be time for a reset. Your children and nearest and dearest will respect you for your courage.

The Shadchan Michelle Mond

ear Not the Joneses, Thank you for trusting our column for guidance on your conundrum. In your question, you do not state that you cannot afford a wedding. You state that you cannot afford a wedding that is up to the standards of the community in which you live. Think about this for a moment. Your husband is the one who is putting a halt on your son’s dating, not you. This leads me to believe that hubby is terrified you will cave to the pressures of the community and not settle for anything less than your neighbors’ standards, so he is trying to prevent a financial catastrophe. After all, you are the one writing in, saying that you could never afford a wedding similar to your neighbors’; however, you describe the type of wedding you could afford, to be, and I quote, “an embarrassment.” I believe your husband is putting his foot down here because he is so nervous that his wife will demand that same $20K custom gown, floating doves, and top caterer that everyone else uses. I would surmise that if you could work on your confidence and determine that you will have a wedding within your budget, when the time arises, your husband will be on board

with your son starting to date. These days you don’t have to spend a lot to have a gorgeous wedding. There are “package” weddings which are subsidized and incredibly affordable such as one that they have at Ateres Elka in Baltimore. These are absolutely stunning simchas that don’t put the parents in debt. Simple answer: don’t cave to pressure and societal standards. If there is anything we learned from coronavirus, it’s that simchas don’t have to be extravagant to be beautiful. Have we forgotten that, just two years ago, couples got married on driveways and in backyards? No country clubs. No orchard renting. No flying doves. No smoke machines. Simply a chosson and kallah under a chuppah starting their lives together. The simplicity of

Have we forgotten that, just two years ago, couples got married on driveways and in backyards?

the simcha made it that more beautiful. Those who attended truly mattered and those who did not watched from afar on Zoom. I guess what I am trying to say is, if there ever was

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a generation that understands functional, practical, simple weddings, it’s ours! Side note: Who says your son will get married right away? You are counting your eggs before they hatch, in my opinion! I hope that your son finds his bashert right away and that you and your husband have the insight to plan a beautiful wedding that is within your budget.

The Zaidy Dr. Jeffrey Galler Of course, your son should start dating now. I’m sure that my fellow panelists will discuss how you needn’t feel that you have to keep up with the Joneses, how there is nothing wrong with a modest wedding, how a simple wedding is even more appropriate in these COVID times, how potential in-

Pulling It All Together The Navidaters

laws will certainly understand your financial limitations, and how you mustn’t impede a young man who is ready to begin the shidduch process. I’d like to focus, instead, on two issues: First, forgive me for pointing out that you may have been negligent in preparing for this moment. If you have a rentable basement, why didn’t you do so five years ago?! Why haven’t you been planning financially for this eventuality? Second, there are many organizations that offer interest-free gemach oans to help families like yours. For example, my shul, the Young Israel of Lawrence-Cedarhurst (516569-3324), has such a

The driving force here has to be what is in the best interest of your son.

program. (A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” His father replied, “I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it.”) Preparing for a simcha is certainly stressful but thank Hashem that you will have a wonderful simcha in your future!

Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

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hank you so much for writing into our panel. I will never forget the lecture on the subject of “shame” given by my favorite graduate school professor. We feel shame when we believe that another person has seen something inside of ourselves that we find personally embarrassing or reprehensible. It is something we do not want others to see or know because we ourselves are not comfortable with it. The professor, quite successful in his own right, had gone a little yacht cruise with incredibly wealthy people, all talking about their yachts. Never one to care about yacht ownership, he shared that his cheeks turned red, and he felt suddenly ashamed that he did not own a yacht. Believe me when I tell you that if this brilliant, successful man felt shame, then we all do from time to time…and what it is that shames us only makes us human…perfectly human.

Living amongst seemingly wealthy people who seem to be able to pay for tuitions, vacations, food, restaurants, expensive clothing, extracurricular activities for the kids, shul memberships, holidays, simchas, etc., all while living in extravagant homes can really be tough on people who don’t have the money to keep up. No one should feel ashamed for having the perfectly human emotions of jealousy and shame that often come along with living in an affluent area. There are so many people who leave because the lifestyle is simply unaffordable or they want to be exposed and/or expose their children to a different set of values. And some people are stuck in these affluent areas for various reasons (schooling, family, etc.). Onto your situation…. I don’t think you should put a stop to your

son’s dating because of this. I have worked with many young people who are very frustrated because their parents are forbidding them from dating for their own personal reasons. If your son wants to date, think of his potential frustration. If he wants this and he’s ready, it’s really unfair to him. As painful and embarrassing as this wedding may be to your husband (hello!), the driving force here has to be what is in the best interest of your son. I think that you and your husband should check into couples counseling for a bit because you will need emotional support to get you through this. Shame doesn’t go away because we tell it to. Shame needs a loving witness to disappear. It needs validation. And it is likely to keep popping up as, G-d willing, your son finds his potential soulmate, you meet her parents, and plan an engagement and then a wedding. It will be wonderful to have a professional to speak with to both support you, help with the em-

barrassment factor, and coach you through this. Not that what I am about to write is the crux of the issue here, but there are many wealthy people who wouldn’t spend frivolously on a wedding. There are many ways to create a meaningful and beautiful wedding on a budget. The most important part of the wedding is the celebration of the marriage and the love and happiness of the couple. Wishing your son an easy dating journey and wishing you both shalom bayis through this decision… and really hoping that as long as you make your son’s needs the top priority, you will make all the right decisions! I know it’s so very hard to keep our anxieties away from our children (none of us are perfect!) but as best as you can, try to keep this anxiety away from your son and between the two of you. All the best! Sincerely, Jennifer

Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and certified trauma healing life coach, as well as a dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY. She also teaches a psychology course at Touro College. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 718-908-0512. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email JenniferMannLCSW@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

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Dirshu Historic Bipartisan “Caucus for the Advancement of Torah Values” Launched in Washington Rav Dovid Hofstedter, Nasi Dirshu Addresses Leading Members of Congress By Chaim Gold

“Today, the inauguration of the “Torah Caucus of the United States Congress” shows the vitality of American democracy. The fact that, less than a century after the Jewish people were almost obliterated, here in Washington, lawmakers are coming together to advance Torah and its ideals is nothing short of remarkable. This development is great for the Jewish people, but it is also great for America!” Those were the powerful, poignant words of Rav Dovid Hofstedter, Nasi of Dirshu, at a historic and momentous event in Washington earlier this month in which the Torah Caucus was launched. The Torah Caucus, short for its full name, “Caucus for the Advancement of Torah Values,” is an amazing development that promises to be a great force in ensuring the preservation of Torah values for the Jewish community and beyond. It is a bipartisan, new caucus that has pledged to advocate on behalf of Torah values in the corridors of American power and beyond. The bipartisan group of lawmakers at the inaugural event, included congressional stalwarts such as Congresswoman Kat Cammack of Florida (R), Congressman Brian Fitzpatrick of Pennsylvania (R), Congressman Henry Cuellar of Texas (D), Congressman Don Bacon of Nebraska (R), Congressman Brian Steil of Wisconsin (R), and Congressman Dan Mueser of Pennsylvania (R). The chairman of the event highlighted the event’s unique character. “We are here to inaugurate the Congressional Caucus for the Advancement of Torah Values - a Congressional Member Organization for the 117th Congress. We live in a world filled with darkness. Not only because of the Coronavirus; but also because of the moral decay and erosion of values we continue witnessing around us. Values that all decent people cherish and hold dear. This is a concerning trend that

Rep. Don Bacon, Rav Dovid Hofstedter, Rep. Henry Cueller, Rep. Daniel Meuser, Rep. Bryan FItzpatrick

needs to be properly challenged. And it’s through this very darkness that Rabbi Dovid Hofstedter, the leader of Dirshu, the largest Torah organization in the world, has chosen to play an instrumental role in helping establish a caucus dedicated to ensuring these very same values are preserved.” The Urgent Need for a Bipartisan Caucus The vital importance for a bipartisan caucus of this sort and the need to mobilize a force in Congress that is dedicated to preserving Torah values has perhaps taken on even more urgency in light of the increasingly poisonous political climate that emboldens anti-Semites on both the far right and the far left. Additionally, it is no secret that there are forces in the United States that are dedicated to assaulting religion and eroding the freedom of religion that has been such a hallmark of American life since the establishment of the United States of America. We need only to look at the recent past when shuls and yeshivos were closed, often in an arbitrary way. We saw how easily long-standing religious freedoms were compromised by power hungry politicians and executives who had little appreciation for the lifegiving ideals provided by religious institutions.

Rav Hofstedter: “Every Nation Is Based On Its Values!” Perhaps, however, the remarks of Rav Hofstedter at that inaugural meeting were most significant because they highlighted the role that the caucus must play beyond anti-Semitism and that is trying to protect the moral values upon which the country was built and that are today under assault. He began by praising the unique democracy that is the United States to the congressmen and many of their congressional aides who attended the event. “Nevertheless,” Rav Hofstedter cautioned, “when we look at the United States today, we see a nation with a tortured soul. Is its heritage a source of pride or shame? Today America struggles to protect the ideals upon which it was founded and the dreams of its youth. It seems unsure of whether to continue leading the world or to withdraw into itself? “Why is it undergoing such a struggle?” Rabbi Hofstedter explained that it is all about values. “Every nation is based on its values. Those values build nations and reflect its aspirations. The values of the great nation of the United States – many of them values that are rooted in the Torah – are under assault and attack. This has been going on for years. Basic values upon

which this great nation was built such as deep respect for religion, for human dignity, honesty, charity, compassion and empathy, have been under attack for years. These attacks undermine the very foundations upon which America was built,” exclaimed Rav Hofstedter emphatically. “A country that does not combat hate and anti-Semitism is not America! A nation that does not fight for religious freedom and to allow those institutions that promote religion and religious teachings to flourish, is not America! A nation that does not stand by its friends with devotion through thick and thin is not the United States of America!” An Extension of Dirshu’s Mission Although at first glance, askanus in Washington seems a bit inconsistent with Dirshu’s primary mission of promoting and facilitating limud haTorah and yedias haTorah at the highest levels, in truth this is just an extension of that mission. It is becoming increasingly clear that as America descends into moral decay, without trying to stem the tide by cultivating Torah values with lawmakers who can make a difference, our very ability to live as frum Jews keeping Torah and mitzvos and learning uninhibited by government decrees and fiat is in jeopardy. Dirshu’s establishment and promotion of the Caucus for the Advancement of Torah Values will better enable the American Torah community to combat the forces of moral decay and anti-Semitism that threaten the longterm viability of the Torah community in the United States and beyond. Reaching out in a bipartisan way to those with influence is a manifestation of hishtadlus that will empower many more Shas Yidden and Shulchan Aruch Yidden to thrive in this country uninhibited by religious persecution and hate and appreciated for the moral values that they represent.

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

‫אברהם דוד בן משה ז״ל‬ Avrahom Dovid Sauer, Z"L

JANUARY 27, 2022

Hatzalah joins the entire community in expressing our sorrow at the untimely loss of its founder,

May Hatzalah's continued efforts to help the community be a zechus for his neshama and for his entire family. The Board, Responders and Dispatchers Alvin S. Mintzes Hatzalah of Baltimore

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Offensive Tax Interference

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

By Allan Rolnick, CPA

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fter eighteen long and grueling weeks, the NFL is finally into the playoffs. The Cincinnati Bengals proved they could finally win a playoff game after 31 years. The Buffalo Bills proved that the Patriots without Tom Brady are just another football team. And the Tampa Bay Buccaneers proved that any team is a contender with the GOAT at quarterback, even if said GOAT is reaching an age where other men start contemplating Crestor prescriptions and AARP discounts. Gamblers across the country look forward to this time of year with the same excitement as a dog with his head out a car window. They’ll dig through all sorts of statistics to squeeze out an edge: “team defensive yards per pass attempt allowed,” “average defensive starting field position,” and “penalty yards per penalty.” But would you believe “home state tax rate” can help predict winners and losers? Let’s go to the tape! NFL teams play in 22 states, with tax rates ranging from zero in several states all the way up to 13.3% in California. Player salaries start at a $435,000 minimum, with an $860,000 average and a $45 million top end for Kansas City QB Patrick Mahomes. Those state and local taxes are enough to intercept a real chunk

of any player’s salary. For example, when Tom Brady signed his $50 million contract with the Bucs, playing in zero-tax Florida saved him an immediate $2.5 million that he would have turned over to his previous home state of “Taxachusetts.”

found an R-squared value of 0.0385, whatever that means.) FiveThirtyEight offers one reason why home-state tax rates may not have much effect. Specifically, most states (and cities with earnings taxes) impose “jock taxes” on visiting

When Tom Brady signed his $50 million contract with the Bucs, playing in zerotax Florida saved him an immediate $2.5 million that he would have turned over to his previous home state of “Taxachusetts.”

So, do those taxes really make a difference? In 2011, the Journal of Sports Economics published an article finding that NBA free agents performed better after moving to lower-tax teams than higher-tax teams. But a more recent study by the data aggregators at FiveThirtyEight.com found no correlation between average top income-tax rates and pro sports championships. (The regression test

players, which means they pay the same as if they were playing for the home team. Even a Miami Dolphin or Jacksonville Jaguar can pay tax on up to half of their games. The same rule applies to out-of-state training camps as well. And they don’t just apply to players! Coaches, trainers, and even broadcasters face the same challenge, except with lower salaries to pay for high-priced help. Negotiating the jock tax rules

can be like trying to return a punt through a crowded backfield. Imagine living in tax-free Florida, playing for the high-tax Buffalo Bills, and visiting to play the average-tax Patriots. That was just “the day after the holidays” this year for running back Frank Gore. In 2018, Sports Illustrated reported: “One All-Pro’s 2016 filing was 400 pages long. He spoke with his tax accountant on a neardaily basis, calling before scheduling a bye-week vacation to income taxfree Florida that saved him $20,000. And this is a guy who has played on the same team his entire career.” The good news here is that, come game time this weekend, you’ll be able to focus on the stats that matter. It’ll be much more fun to watch the 10-7 Bengals take on the 12-5 Titans than it would be to watch the 13.3% 49ers take on the 7.65% Packers. And if you win enough on the game to make a difference on your taxes, we can help with that, too!

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

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