Parenting Pearls

Parenting Pearls Mommy Camp

By Sara Rayvych, MSEd

Mommy camp is a classic. While most children will attend one of our wonderful local camps or venture away from home for sleepaway camp, many families will choose to have one or more children spend their summer at home. While it’s becoming less and less common for children to not be enrolled in some form of official camp, there are still many children who enjoy a summer at home.

The truth is that while it’s called “Mommy camp,” anyone can run it, and for any portion of the day, so for this article I’m preferring the term “camp at home.” Whether it’s dad who dedicates the summer to the little ones or grandparents who make that time for bonding, campat-home has many advantages and time for family togetherness. To be honest, it can also have some challenges, but many who do it will say the benefits far outweigh the difficulties.

Some parents will simply make the decision based on finances. Other children aren’t ready for an outside program, while other kids simply want to enjoy being home with their family. Most of the children who stay home for the summer will be the younger set but you will definitely find children of all ages availing themselves of this option. Round robins are another popular option for families, and many find it to be a good in-between for their child.

I will not discuss whether day camp, sleepaway camp or at-home camp is the better option for your child, since each has its own benefits. More importantly, every child is unique and what works for the majority of children may not work for your unique child. Planning your child’s summer is a great opportunity for them to grow during this fun time period, and picking the right program is a responsibility parents take seriously.

Scheduling

Creating a schedule can, and should, be based on what works best for both the adult in charge and the children “attending” camp-at-home. There are some children that require a regiment of clear guidelines of where they need to be at any given moment and what they should be doing at that time. Most kids are not like this. Take the time in advance to think of what type of schedule will best meet your child’s needs. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to this, and it’s really what best suits your individual child.

Many, if not most, kids will benefit from some structure with lots of free play. Since I think this is the most common structure, I will focus on this scheduling option the most. Schedules need not look like an army regiment but having some structure can create guidance and balance in a child’s day.

The needs of a younger child will, obviously, differ from the needs of an older child. The truth is that some of our youngest campers may not experience much of a change from their usual year-round schedule – and that’s fine. Children, especially the youngest members of the family, thrive on predictability and continuity from day to day.

Davening, meals, bath and nap/ bedtime are some of the basics to schedule in a child’s day. Just having these in place gives some rhythm to their schedule. Most likely, you already have these in place but having them somewhat set is grounding for a child. Little ones, in particular, don’t have a good concept of time but can often understand time based on these signposts. For example, a toddler won’t understand that sprinklers are at 2:00 but may happily accept the answer of “after lunch.” Knowing they can expect these familiar events daily gives some security to a child and automatic help to an adult in planning any other events.

You don’t need a trip, project or event scheduled for every day. Over-filling your schedule can lead to burnout and exhaustion, although you should definitely feed your child every day!

There are kids that may want no structure whatsoever, but, especially for older kids, there are reasons why even these kids may benefit from some scheduling guidance. Without anything to do all day, children can get restless, bored or simply accomplish nothing. Children are more motivated when they’re involved in making their schedules. The older they are, the more involved they can become. Teens, in particular, may surprise you with their creativity when given the freedom to design their daily plans.

Don’t forget the needs of the adults! Adults are people, too. Create a schedule with your own needs in mind, as well. There are parents that thrive on clear schedules, while others find that stifling. Keep your own tendencies in mind as you help build your child’s daily rhythm. Without taking your own needs into account, you risk being overwhelmed and eventual burnout. Spending time with your child should be enjoyable for both of you. Feeling like a tortured martyr won’t

help, and your children will enjoy being with a happier parent. Make it work for you, too, and include activities that you will find interesting.

Suggested Activities

There are so many things to do with your child over the summer so I’ll throw in just a few suggestions. These summer activities are actually great for after camp, summer weekends, and those days between camp and school, as well.

Water play is a classic, and there are many ways to bring this into your daily or weekly schedule. Depending on your child’s age and family’s standards, some water play will be more suited to your needs than others. Sprinklers are often the easiest way to make little ones happy on a hot day. You can get the bonus of a well-watered lawn at the same time, all without leaving your property. Some of the local parks such as Cedarhurst Park and Grant Park have sprinklers that are a treat for kids. They can get soaked and then dry under the sun while playing in the playground. It’s a formula for a happy child. Our bigger kids have enjoyed swimming at the local pool that has separate swimming hours. They’ve enjoyed the water and the friends they’ve made there. The CCRP pool with separate swimming hours is located right here on the Darchei campus. You can reach them at (718)868-2300, ext. 386 for more information and exact hours. Even our camp-attending children have enjoyed after-camp swim time there.

Parks are local, free, and fun. Take advantage of having so many in our area. Kids love being able to run, play, and just be active. It’s great for their growing bodies and developing minds. You can switch up which park you visit if you think they need variety, but often kids are happy visiting the familiar.

Arts and crafts and other projects are easy, educational, and a quick win among kids. Even older kids can find some craft or handson skills they want to pursue during their summer vacation. You can purchase pre-made kits or just buy some supplies and let the kids get creative. Make sure to set them up outside, over a disposable or easily cleaned tablecloth or similar area so the mess is contained. It’s more motivating for parents to set up crafts if you know you won’t be crying at the mess afterwards.

Trips are one of the highlights of camp and can be incorporated into your at-home camp experience as well. See what’s available and within your price range. Don’t drive yourself crazy with trip planning, but children, especially the middle and older aged kids, find trips add something special to their summer experience. You don’t need to travel far nor do you need to spend hours away from home to add a little extra excitement. Many of the staycation ideas TJH advertises will be a good place to look. Even just the local library or an outing for a smoothie at one of our local establishments can be an eventful trip for a child. Window shopping at the yearly sidewalk sale became a standard trip for our kids that they looked forward to each year. trying to take them off the planning board.

Teens and older kids can easily incorporate productive activities into their day. This will not only give them something to do but also

Children, especially the youngest members of the family, thrive on predictability and continuity from day to day.

Learning during the summer can, and should, be extra fun. It’s an excellent opportunity for a child to learn a topic that really catches their attention. It can be the Torah spark for a child that may not experience that in his/her learning during the year.

There are so many ways to make your child’s summer into a wonderful and productive experience. Finding what works for you and your child takes some thought but can turn their break from school into both an educational lesson and a time of treasured memories for all of you.

The Older Set

We have had older kids home for part or all of the day during the summer. This is a bit more challenging, but they still managed to have a productive summer. It is far less common for teens to be at home but for these situations you may want more structure than you’d include for a younger child. It’s too easy to find your sweet teenager in bed all day, doing nothing.

As mentioned above, teens will benefit from being involved in the planning of their summer but there’s no reason you can’t be involved, too. Try to phrase it in a way that your child will see it with the gentle guidance and love you intend and not as a special experience with life skills to bring into the rest of the year. Volunteering, learning with a peer chavrusa or mentor, or working at a part-time job are all options for older kids. Letting children find what fits their interests will keep them interested longer.

Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at RayvychHomeschool@ gmail.com.

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